#i will pour syrup into your shoes. i will steal exactly half of your socks. i will wash your whites with your coloureds on hot

[connanro]

the only thing that really makes me hammer that block button is people who unironically ship batjokes. of all the many problematic ships in the dc universe that is the one that REALLY get my goat. Enrages me. makes my blood boil. the first time i ever blocked someone was because they reblogged a batman post of mine and made a comment about batjokes on it. that was nearly six years ago and it still fills me with the desire to Smash. with Absolute Rage. with Murderous Intent. get thee behind me, satan

[bunyoul-blog]

title: 4am (I’m really hoping you will stay) pairings: xiaohee  summary:  All Dongyeol wanted to do was wash his shirt length: 2k extra info: based on the prompt 'you're lying on the floor of the 24/7 laundromat at 3am, it's not my fault that I stood on you' ao3 link

It’s all Jinwook’s fault.

Dongyeol comes to that conclusion pretty quickly as he leaves his dorm room at 3am, hood pulled over his head to block out the cold and his costume for the upcoming theatre production rolled up in his bag. If only his older roommate had been less enthusiastic about singing into his cup of blackcurrant squash, or taken more care to avoid tripping over his phone charger instead of dumping the contents of his cup all over Dongyeol’s costume.

With his dress rehearsal coming up in approximately eight hours, a late-night-come-early-morning trip to the laundromat was in order.

The true College experience.

Dongyeol curses Jinwook and his poor sense of balance as he makes his way quietly down the corridor, fully aware of the fact that waking anyone up- or disturbing a late night study session- would likely get him drop-kicked down the nearest staircase.

He sighs as he steps out into the cold air, the street lamps doing little to illuminate the pavement in front of him. Dongyeol thanks every higher power he can think of for the small mercy that the laundromat is little more than a five minute walk from his accomodation.

It’s eerie wandering the streets so early in the morning. Dongyeol is used to the sight of people rushing to-and-fro: the busy atmosphere of daylight. He prefers to stay indoors past 11pm to avoid the cold, so usually misses out on the sudden stillness of the early morning.

He walks a little faster.

The Laundromat appears deserted when Dongyeol arrives- of course it is, who else would get up at 3am to wash clothes- and he’s grateful for the lights that flicker on as he enters, spreading a murky sort of warmth across the room.

As he heads for one of the machines at the back of the room, Dongyeol’s foot lands on something that definitely isn’t the linoleum floor. At the same time as Dongyeol recoils, the thing he stepped on lets out a muffled noise of distaste.

The thing on the floor is a person, Dongyeol soon finds- a boy with brown hair and a sweater that looks far too big for him, lying face down on the floor of the laundromat. At 3am.

“You stood on me.” The person’s voice is muffled as he speaks, not lifting his head up from the ground.

“You’re the one lying on the floor.” Dongyeol retorts before he can stop himself. “It’s your fault.” Great, you initiated conversation. Now he has permission to fight you.

“Should’ve been looking where you were going.” Fortunately for Dongyeol, the person on the floor doesn’t seem to be in much of a mood for fighting, not moving from his position.

“I wasn’t exactly expecting a person to be lying there.” Dongyeol is tempted to poke the boy with his foot to see if he would respond or not. “Why are you even down there.”

The person shuffles in what seems to be an attempt at a horizontal version of a shrug. “I have an essay on effective vocal warm-ups due in tomorrow and I haven’t started it.” he explains. “So I came here to embrace death.”

“Why the laundromat though?” Dongyeol is invested now; glad for any form of entertainment as he takes his shirt out of his bag and throws it into the nearest machine.

“My roommate told me that I wasn’t allowed to lie on the floor because I was getting in his way, and then Wooseok told me that if I laid down in his room he would call the police.” Another horizontal shrug. “So I’m here instead.”

Dongyeol covers up a laugh as he adjusts the settings on the washing machine and lets it start cleaning the blackcurrant juice stain off his costume.

“You stepped on me so now you need to buy me food.” There’s movement from behind Dongyeol and the boy on the floor sits up. His hair is messy and there’s a red mark on his face from where it’s been pressed against the ground- he looks a little like a kicked puppy and Dongyeol almost feels bad for him.

Almost.

“I’m not buying you food.” Dongyeol is only there to wash his costume.

There’s more movement, and the person from the floor stands up. He’s a little bit shorter than Dongyeol, and his sweater is definitely a few sizes too big for him, the sleeves covering his hands so only the fingertips are visible. There’s an earring in the shape of a star hanging from one of his ears. Dongyeol refuses to call him cute.

“Please?” The person asks again, the same kicked puppy look passing across his face. Dongyeol sighs. He’s always been a dog person.

“Yeah, okay then.” At Dongyeol’s agreement, the boy grins, jumps, and hits his foot on one of the washing machines. Dongyeol doesn’t cover up the fact that he’s laughing this time. “Idiot.”

The statement earns a semi-offended pout from the boy. “My name is Hwanhee, not Idiot.”

“Okay, hi Idiot, I’m Dongyeol.” He lets his laugh upgrade to a grin as Hwanhee whines in response, kicking his foot at the edge of the washing machines again. Dongyeol can practically hear Yein berating him about talking to strangers- yet here he is doing it anyway.

They talk more- Dongyeol finds that Hwanhee is older than him by seven months, that he’s a vocal performance major (a conversation topic that branches into Hwanhee climbing on top of one of the driers and breaking out into a rendition of the Circle of Life.), and that his friend Wooseok is looking for an opportunity to sell him to Satan. Hwanhee finds that Dongyeol is younger and spends a full ten minutes lording it over him, that he’s studying theatre, and that his roomate Jinwook is Clumsy and Insufferable and Doesn’t know how to hold a cup of squash.

Dongyeol transfers his shirt to the drier, glad that the front is no longer stained and smelling of blackcurrant. Hwanhee watches him as he does so. “You didn’t tell me you have a double life as a Victorian-age vampire.” He gestures at the shirt as Dongyeol starts up the drier, pointing out the ruffles and fancy edges.

“It’s for a production I’m part of,” Dongyeol explains. “Dress rehearsal is tomorrow so Jinwook decided to pour his juice all over it while trying to hit the high notes in ‘I will always love you’.”

The drier whirrs quietly in the background, and Hwanhee takes off his shoes, finding that he can slide on the laundromat floor in his socks. Dongyeol joins him after little hesitation. Someone walks past the window, peering in at the two college students racing each other around the washing machines, shaking their head and walking on as Hwanhee waves, face scrunching up in a wide grin. The passerby steps out of view, and both collapse into a fit of laughter, Hwanhee grabbing onto Dongyeol’s arm to keep himself upright as his mismatched socks slip on the floor.

It all feels startlingly natural.

The drier finishes up with a shrill tone, surprising Dongyeol out of his dramatic retelling of the time his friend Sungjun got stuck up a climbing frame in the kids playground. As he fetches his shirt, folding it up and placing it back in his bag, Hwanhee leans over his shoulder.

“You owe me food now.” Ah. Dongyeol had forgotten about his earlier promise to apologise via offerings of food.

As good as Hwanhee’s company is, Dongyeol didn’t expect his quick trip to the laundromat to be followed up with walking around the streets at 4am, the roads deserted and the time too early even for partygoers to be walking around. More than anything, Dongyeol is tired- he wants nothing more than to sit down somewhere and maybe drink an entire bucket of coffee. A glance to his right tells him that Hwanhee is also tired, yawning loudly and reaching up to rub at his eyes with the edges of his sleeves.

The star earring swings as Hwanhee walks. Still not cute; Dongyeol reminds himself.

They find a 24 hour diner, the neon sign above the door not fully functional and the seats a little worse for wear as they drop down into them- but neither of them are complaining. There only seems to be one person working there, and she appears both tired and bored as she walks over to take their orders. Hwanhee empties a criminally large amount of sugar into his coffee once it arrives, and Dongyeol steals some of his pancakes despite having a plate of his own.

Conversation is minimal; both of them too concentrated on refueling their energy to bother with speaking. Dongyeol laments that he’s going to be dead on his feet for his rehearsal, and Hwanhee sighs, announcing that he has accepted his fate that his professor is going to violently murder him.

Dongyeol may be starting to regret his life choices. Staying up till 3am the day before a performance for an impromptu karaoke session was a bad idea in itself; but wandering around the streets at night and winding up eating pancakes in a 24 hour diner was a whole other level of poor decision making.

He glances at Hwanhee across the table, his sweater sleeves threatening to slip down his hands and fall in his golden syrup. At least he has company.

One of the diner lights flickers overhead, and a car passes by outside, its headlights reaching in through the windows like a searchlight, casting a brief patterns of shadows and highlights on Hwanhee’s face. Hwanhee- with his loud laugh, his messy hair, his star-shaped earring.

Who no longer feels like a stranger.

“We should split the cost of the food.” Dongyeol speaks up, pulling his bag onto his lap to search through it for coins. Hwanhee looks down to examine his pockets.

“I-” He glances off to the side, sheepish. “Don’t have enough money.”

Dongyeol halts his search of his bag. “And neither do I.”

They take a look at their plates, pancakes fully eaten, and the minimal selection of coins that they’ve each managed to pull out, not even reaching half the cost of their food. Another glance, towards the sole member of staff at the diner reveals that she looks half asleep- not concentrating.

“We could sneak out?” Dongyeol whispers his idea, hesitant, towards Hwanhee.

“We don’t really have any other choice, do we?” They use a pen lying in the bottom of Dongyeol’s bag to scribble a hasty ‘sorry’ on one of the napkins, then crouch down on the floor of the diner and shuffle out of their seats, deciding that the best way to avoid detection would be to crawl around the booths then out of the door, relying on the diner staff being too dead to the world to notice them leaving.

Hwanhee has a firm grip on Dongyeol’s wrist as they shuffle along the floor, turning around to press a finger against his lips in an attempt to hush the younger when he threatens to start laughing at the sight of Hwanhee nearly slipping on a biscuit wrapper. When they’re close to the door, Hwanhee starts quietly humming the mission impossible theme, and Dongyeol reaches forwards to clamp a hand over Hwanhee’s mouth to shut him up. Dongyeol can feel Hwanhee grinning against his hand, eyes scrunching up. They keep moving.

The moment they get out of the door, Dongyeol grabs onto Hwanhee and runs, sprinting down the street as the other laughs and stumbles to catch up, tripping on the pavement.

“We just broke the law,” Hwanhee speaks, breathless, once they’re far away from the diner, leaning up against a lamppost to catch his breath. “We’re partners in crime now.”

All Dongyeol came out to do was wash his shirt.

The time on Dongyeol’s phone reads 4:23am, and the coffee is only just taking the edge off his tiredness. Hwanhee yawns next to him, stretching his arms into the air and announcing, “I should go home now.” He digs around in his pockets, evidently searching for his keys.

“I should head back too,” Dongyeol responds. “If I don’t get back, Jinwook will-”

“I didn’t bring my keys with me.” Hwanhee cuts him off, voice filled with a sense of dread that is honestly far too dramatic for the situation. “I can’t get back to my dorm.”

Dongyeol expects Hwanhee to pull out his phone and maybe call his roommate, or ask a friend if he can sleep at their dorm. What he doesn’t expect Hwanhee to do is sit down on the pavement and burst into tears.

Truthfully, Dongyeol is more taken aback than anything else. One moment Hwanhee is laughing and kicking at an empty soda can on the ground, and the next he’s sitting in the middle of the street, sweater sleeves pressed against his face and his breath coming out in hiccups.

Dongyeol doesn’t know what to do, so naturally he calls Yein.

He knows Yein probably won’t be too happy about it- his mom friend duties only apply from 7am till 10pm- but Dongyeol is desperate.

The phone rings once, twice, then Yein picks up, voice sounding sleepy and confused. “Dongyeol it’s 4am.”

“I have an issue.” Hwanhee is still crying next to him, saying something about how he’s never going to get home again, and a car drives past, the driver giving them both strange looks as they pass by.

“Was that a car? Are you outside?” The worry kicks into Yein’s voice. “Dongyeol why are you outside right now? Are you okay?”

“What do you do when a human version of a puppy who you’ve known for approximately 2 hours sits down on the pavement and starts crying because he can’t find his keys.” Dongyeol already realises how ridiculous the situation is, but it sounds even worse when put into words.

There’s silence from Yein’s end of the line, then an exhausted sounding “It’s too early for this.” before he hangs up.

And so Dongyeol is on his own with this one.

“Hey Hwanhee, you can sleep at my dorm for tonight if you want?” Dongyeol crouches next to Hwanhee, placing a hand on his shoulder in what he hopes is a comforting manner. The other boy looks up from between his fingers. His eyes are red, and he looks tired, tears smudged down his cheeks, catching the light from the overhead streetlamps slightly.

There’s a small nod from Hwanhee, then he pulls himself to his feet, rubbing at his eyes with the corners of his sleeves. “Could I?”

“Well I wouldn’t have asked you if I wasn’t okay with it.” Dongyeol laughs, poking Hwanhee’s shoulder. He leads Hwanhee in the direction of his dorm, back along the deserted streets and past the laundromat, its lights turned off once again. Once again; he can feel Yein berating him for talking to strangers.

This is what happens when I’m left to make my own decisions. Dongyeol muses to himself, glancing across at Hwanhee, who looks like he’s about to fall asleep where he stands. What harm could he do anyway.

They enter the dorm quietly, making their way up to Dongyeol’s room with light footsteps so as not to wake anyone. Jinwook is asleep on his own bed, half buried in his duvet, and Dongyeol turns to Hwanhee to signal for him to be as quiet as possible. In his half asleep state, Hwanhee mimes zipping his lips closed and throwing away a key.

“There’s nowhere to sleep except for my bed,” Dongyeol whispers. “I hope you don’t mind sharing.”

In response, Hwanhee kicks his shoes off and sits down heavily on the edge of the bed, shuffling over to the side closest to the wall and curling up to leave room for Dongyeol. He’s asleep by the time the younger joins him. Dongyeol lies down and closes his eyes, hoping to make the most of the two hours sleep he has time for. An arm lands on top of Dongyeol’s stomach, and he soon finds a sleeping Hwanhee crowded into his personal space.

Of course he’s a sleep-cuddler.

Dongyeol sighs, turns over and attempts to fall asleep. Hwanhee can be a problem for his future self to deal with.

-

“Dongyeol, why is there a boy in your bed with you?” Dongyeol wakes up to Jinwook standing over him and Hwanhee’s face lost somewhere in the spot between his neck and his shoulder.

“I found him at the laundromat last night and now we’re partners in crime.” Dongyeol explains sleepily, waving his hand as if to shoo his roommate away. Jinwook is silent for a while, before speaking.

“Does he want breakfast?”

“I don’t know,” In response, Dongyeol shrugs and rolls over to face Hwanhee. He’s still asleep- his hair has somehow become even more messy overnight and he’s drooling on Dongyeol’s pillow a little bit. He wrinkles his nose up and makes a small noise of distaste as Dongyeol pokes him in the cheek to wake him. Still not cute. “Do you want breakfast?”

“Yeah.” Hwanhee untangles himself from Dongyeol and sits up, stretching and yawning loudly. “Maybe not pancakes though.”

-

One successful dress-rehearsal later, Dongyeol receives a text from an unknown number.

[unknown]

i ate wooseok’s cereal and now he’s trying to kill me

please help

this is hwanhee btw

i got your number from your roommate

hope you don’t mind

anyway i fear for my life please help

Save contact as [puppy] ?

[dongyeol]

you remember where my dorm is right?