#i will fight the people saying dennis is just lucky

[molliemoo3]

Dennis p17 to p5 in f2 and Callum p27 to p12 in indy is a pretty good day. And Paul and Estie Bestie podiums in f3 and f1.

[chaoticgremlinwholikescheese]

Don’t Let Go

Whump

Angst

Hurt/Comfort

Hurt Evan "Buck" Buckley

Protective Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)

I am californian and fire season is a genuine thing

AO3 LINK

Usually there's four seasons. Fall, winter, spring, and summer. In California, there's five seasons. Fall, winter, spring, summer, and fire. Fire season comes every year without fail. It's a staple of life you get used to when you live in the sunshine state. However, with climate change, the fires get worse every year. And this year is the worst one in decades.

"118! Listen up!"

Bobby's voice rings through the fire house as silence falls. Everyone gathers around him.

"As you all know, this years fire season has been bad. Our station has been assigned to fight the fires on the southern ridges. This is going to be a five day assignment, but it could go longer. We're expected to arrive by eight AM tomorrow. I know this is short notice, and I apologize, but I just found out about this myself. After shift today, please make any arrangements you need to. If you require assistance or have questions, feel free to ask me. Thank you all."

There's murmuring from the crowd, but it dissipates as everyone scatters.

"I was hoping we wouldn't be dispatched for a bit longer," Eddie sighs.

"It comes every year like clock work. Do you know if Carla can watch Chris?"

"Honestly, Buck, I don't know. I'll call and ask."

"Karen said she could watch the kids after work. Chris can stay with Denny, it'll be like a super-long sleepover," Hen interjects. "So as long as Carla can watch Chris during the day, everything should be fine."

"Hen. Have I ever told you and Karen that you two are the greatest people on the planet?"

"Yes. But hearing it again never hurts."

Hen goes off to chat with Chim, who's calling Maddie. Eddie turns to Buck.

"I was going to invite you over for a movie night tonight, but you'll probably want to pack."

"I've got everything I need at your place. I can throw it in my travel bag. Plus, I promised Chris I would make Bobby's lasagna tonight."

Eddie has this soft smile on his face. It's one that's reserved solely for Chris and Buck. Hen calls it his 'love-sick smile'. And in all honesty, Eddie knows she's right. He's head over heels for Buck. Has been for years. It's as familiar to him as breathing. Maybe one day he'll tell Buck. But for right now, he doesn't want to risk losing Buck completely. He can't handle that. He just got him back after the lightning strike. He won't lose him again just because he can't keep his feelings in check.

The alarm goes off, spurring everyone into action. Eddie forces himself to clear his mind.

*******************

Buck knows Eddie's kitchen like the back of his hand. Partially because he reorganized it while stressed, but more so because he cooks here more than he ever does in his own home. He spends more time at Eddie's house than he does his own house in general. He's become a staple in the Diaz household. And he'll forever be grateful that they want him here.

"Okay, the lasagna is almost ready. Chris, can you grab the water from the fridge?"

Chris does so, Dodging Eddie as he goes to grab the plates. The timer goes off and Buck grabs the food from the oven. He places it on the table, taking his seat next to Eddie.

"This smells amazing."

"Lucky for you, you're getting the first piece," Buck says as he serves Chris a slice.

They all dig in. They chat about their day. Chris updates them on the gossip from school. It's the domestic moments like these that Buck loves the most.

After dinner, Buck washes the dishes as Eddie dries them. Chris runs off to his room to get into PJs.

"We have to tell him we're being dispatched," Eddie whispers.

"I know."

"I hate leaving him."

"Me too."

He bumps his shoulder into Eddie's, a silent show of support. Eddie smiles at him. They stay like that as they wash the rest of the dishes. Eventually, Chris comes back in, now clad in dinosaur pajamas.

"Hey Chris, before we start the movie, we gotta talk about something really quick."

Chris shoots them a nervous look. Buck quickly assures him it's nothing bad. That seems to relax the boy a bit, but he's clearly still worried.

"You know the fires going on? Buck and I are being sent to go fight them. We'll be gone for a couple days. We have to leave tomorrow. Carla will watch you during the day like usual, and you'll stay with Karen and Denny."

"How long will you be gone?"

"We don't know. Probably about five days. I promise I'll take care of your dad, alright?"

"And I'll take care of Buck. We'll be back before you know it."

Chris nods.

"I'm not worried. As long as you two stay together, you'll both come home," he says confidently.

"Exactly. Now, what movie do you want to watch, mijo?"

*******************

Buck spends the ride to basecamp doing crossword puzzles. Occasionally he'll ask Eddie for help with a question, but on the whole his collection of random knowledge makes the puzzles easy. Eddie passes the time scrolling on his phone. He has a bunch of articles that Buck sent him, so he works his way through those. They're about a variety of different subjects. Buck tends to go on research binges, and he'll send Eddie things he finds interesting. Eddie loves it.

When they arrive, Bobby orders everyone to disembark. The moment Eddie steps outside, he's hit by a wave of smoky air. The sky is a shade of orange. It's apocalyptic. Bobby leads them over to the main tent, where everything is being organized. A woman comes out to meet them. She's rather short, but she exudes intimidating energy. Her salt-and-pepper hair is tied back in a tight bun.

"Hi, everyone. I'm Captain Hestwen. I'm the one in charge here. In a minute, you'll be getting your assignments. Over to the left is the field hospital. That tent right there is the bunks, grab naps whenever you can. A full nights sleep won't happen. Food is at the green tent, and the tent next to that is where we're storing gear. If you need me, I'll be here. I'll be seeing you all later at the briefing."

She heads inside just as Bobby comes out. He starts listing off their different positions.

"Chim, Hen, you're on med. You're going with a team from the 159 to help with evacuations and injuries. Andrews, you're joining the 35. Jefferson, you're going to help with heli-rescue. Diaz, Buck, you two are going out with the 128 to help with search and rescue. I'm staying here to help Captain Hestwen. Keep your radios on. The wind could shift, so I want to make sure I can get in touch with you all if I need to. Stay safe, everyone."

With that, everyone heads to their designated positions. It takes Eddie and Buck a moment to locate the 128. They find the crew resting around a table. There's about four of them. A young man comes up to greet them.

"Buckley and Diaz? I'm Ryan. I'm heading up this crew. That's Teri, Hartley, and Muniz."

"Nice to meet you. Call me Buck."

They all shake hands before heading over to the table. There's a map laid out, marked by red pins.

"Okay. There's a campsite that was right along the fire line. Most of the campers got out, but there's still three missing. There's a teenage girl named Jocelyn who was doing a solo trip, and a young couple, Nick and Theo. The wind is shifting fast, so we need to move faster. There's no way to get a helicopter out in this smoke, so we're taking ATVs down. We need to cover a large distance, so we're going to take different areas. Muniz, you're with me, taking the North campsite. Teri and Hartley, you're taking the east. Buck and Diaz, you're taking the west corner. You'll all get a map. Keep in mind that the fire line will be constantly shifting, so the map may be inaccurate."

Ryan leads them to the ATVs. Buck opts to drive, since Eddie is better at reading maps. It's a skill he picked up in the army. After making sure they're all on the same radio channel, they go their separate ways. Eddie directs Buck along the side trails. The road is thin and rocky. The smoke gets thicker as they head closer to the fire line. Buck can feel it settling on his skin. He calls out all three names, praying that they hear a response.

"To the left! A tent!"

Buck pulls over when he hears Eddie yell. They get out to investigate. There's two sleeping bags, so it must be Nick and Theo's. There's not much of the tent left. It looks like the fire swept through, charring everything in it's path. Buck calls out their names, even though it's unlikely the two men are anywhere nearby. They likely would have run from the fire.

"Let's head further down the trail. My guess is that they ran when the fire came."

Eddie nods in agreement. They climb back in and start to drive again. They see the evidence of the fire all around them. They're getting closer to the fire itself. When Nick and Theo ran, they didn't know the fire line would shift with the wind. They had no idea they were running straight towards it.

"Theo! Nick!"

Eddie's voice is hoarse from the combination of yelling and smoke. Nevertheless, he yells out their names again.

"Down here! Help!"

Buck abruptly stops. They run out of the ATV, heading towards the voice. They end up on a steep ridge. Down below, the two men are sitting. One appears mostly okay, but the other has a badly cut leg. Eddie can see the white of bone from where he's standing.

"The ridge collapsed! We can't get out," one yells.

"Grab the med bag," Buck orders. When Eddie returns, Buck has already scrambled down the ridge. He's putting pressure on the man's wound with the gauze from his pocket. "Throw down a rope! You'll have to pull them up, okay?"

They don't have access to their usual gear. All they have is some rope and carabiners. Eddie ties one end of the rope around a large boulder. He gives it a tug to make sure it's secure. Then he tosses the other end over the ridge, watching to make sure it doesn't get snagged on anything. Buck quickly ties it into a rescue knot.

"Theo, you need to go up. Eddie is going to help you."

"I'm not leaving Nick!"

"I promise I'll take care of him."

"Go," Nick croaks.

Theo hesitates, but grabs onto the rope. Eddie instructs him to put the loops around his legs. Once Theo is secure, Eddie uses all his strength to pull him up. Even with his gloves, the rope bites into his hands. The moment Theo appears over the edge, Eddie pulls him fully to safety.

"Are you hurt anywhere?"

"No. I mean yes, I have some cuts and a sprained wrist, but you need to take care of my boyfriend first, please-"

"Buck's got him. Go get in the ATV, we're going to get you both out of here."

The radio attached to Eddie's chest crackles to life. Bobby's voice comes over the line.

"All search and rescue teams, be advised that the wind is shifting. Fire is rapidly heading west."

Eddie swears. The fire is heading right for them. He can see it in the distance, getting closer with each passing second. They need to get out of here. He runs back to the edge of the ridge and throws the rope back down. Buck helps Nick up, carrying the majority of his weight. Buck has tied a tourniquet just above his wound. With a good bit of help, Nick gets secured to the rope. Buck gives Eddie a thumbs up.

It's when Eddie gets Nick to the top that the ridge collapses, taking the rock and rope with it. Eddie barely grabs Nick in time. Half the ridge falls, boulders tumbling down. He pulls Nick to safety before running over to check on Buck. He breathes a sigh of relief when he sees that Buck is stumbling to his feet.

"You okay?"

"I'm fine. Ankle might be broken though," Buck says. He's leaning heavily on his right side.

Eddie can see the fire getting closer. It'll reach them in only a couple of minutes. He has to get Buck up and out of here fast. Theo has already helped Nick into the ATV. Eddie searches the back for another rope, but there's none. Fuck. Eddie races back to the edge, wary of the fact that the ridge is unstable.

"You need to climb! Can you?"

"I don't think so. Eddie, you need to get Nick and Theo out of here. I'll find a different way up."

"I'm not leaving you."

"The fire is heading this way. You need to go!"

Eddie looks at Nick and Theo. Theo still has a small backpack on.

"Theo! Do you have any rope on you?"

He checks his bag, smiling when he pulls out a thin line. Eddie grabs it, testing its strength. It's enough. It has to be. He finds another hefty boulder and ties one end of the rope around it, making sure it's tightly knotted. He throws the other end down. He can feel the heat emanating from the fast-approaching flames. Buck knots the other end around himself. He looks warily at the flames, now eating through the trees only a few feet away.

Eddie begins to pull. His muscles scream at him, exhausted from all the work, but he ignores the pain. All that matters is getting Buck to safety.

The rope creaks.

It snaps.

Eddie lunges forward, grabbing Buck's hand just in time. The rope drops into the flames below. Eddie tries to pull Buck up, but he gets dragged towards the edge. The only thing holding him in place is the root his foot is lodged in, but that's about to give way too.

"Eddie, you have to let go, I'm going to pull you down with me," Buck begs.

"No," Eddie chokes out through gritted teeth. If he lets go Buck is going to fall. And if the fall doesn't kill him, the inferno waiting below will.

"Chris needs you."

"He needs you too!"

"Tell him I love him, okay? And- and there's notes for everyone. Just in case. They're in a box in my closet. Tell everyone I love them, alright?"

"Buck, please-" Eddie's cut off by his own strangled sob. The root gives way a little more.

"It's okay. I love you, Eddie."

With one last smile, Buck lets go. Eddie watches him fall.

CONTINUE READING ON AO3

[dennistanner]

It was almost like a game of cat-and-mouse between two secret agents. The last person Dennis would ever liken himself to was James Bond, but the blonde beside him made him feel far more masculine, intriguing, and dangerous than he actually was. Although he didn’t take shit when handed it, Dennis was on the shorter side and likewise lean and not very strong. He also never cared enough to get in a fight outside of a moshpit, which made him all in all, a very soft man. Just the idea that his companion felt even remotely threatened by him was laughable, but he also understood more than most men that women often lived in fear the moment they stepped out of their homes, and half of them didn’t even feel safe inside it. It was the only good quality he would credit himself for having, and it was what had him dipping no more than a toe in the water when testing the woman. 

“Why do I get the feeling it’s never just a threat with you? Not that I’m discouraging you from choking me, I’m just saying, if I don’t turn at least a little red you aren’t doing it right.” He grinned smugly. Hand on his heart, Dennis hammed up being flattered as she expressed her disgust with his reaction. It was more than fun at this point, and he was happy to get something out of going out of his way, even if it was just a moment of her company. “ You’re the one who said it, not me. I mean, I know I’m cute, but it’s still nice to hear it from you. And they said romance was dead.” He teased. 

“Seedy, but a goldmine. I might even snag a few things for myself if I’m lucky. They kinda just left this place to rot since the guy that owned this branch like…commited fraud or something, I dunno…” He shrugged, leading her in further. “ He was kind of a shady guy and I think some of this shit was supposed to go back to a warehouse or like, the franchise, but he dipped and a lot of things were ‘unaccounted for’ “ Dennis said with air quotes.” I think the only reason this place hasn’t been looted to it’s pipes is cause people are afraid or maybe they don’t wanna steal from a shady guy, but I’m sure you don’t have that problem. Plus, some of this shit probably has some reselling value on Ebay.”

As they finally reached the bay doors of the loading area, Dennis took a look around for a second before pointing out the dumpsters in the distance. They were a ways away, but not far. “I know a guy who works at the supermarket that’s in the neighboring lot — they sorta shared this back area for loading shit and sometimes the people from the store would throw things out in the dumpsters here to avoid the homeless digging through theirs and leaving them to clean up, or so cut back on costs when the trash collectors come. I’m pretty sure they’re still doing it, so you’ll probably find good stuff in there. But if you’re up for a little B&E….” Dennis smiled, nodding towards the large, shuttered doors. “ I can get in here easy. I’m sure they haven’t liquidated everything, and I know it’s worth something. All depends on how much you feel like breaking the law tonight?”

For the first time Dylan withheld from acting on her intrusive thoughts. She caught the side of his eye as it dipped to his peripheral, trying to gage her reaction. He had to know by now that it bothered her less than most, and even if he claimed he was put off by how much she was rejecting him Dylan could tell it would satisfy him just to hear another quip. It was almost endearing the way he kept coming up with things to bug her, almost tripping over rocks because he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the thrill of catching her reaction.

She kept that comment to herself, already feeding his whims with her careless and reckless mouth. Instead, she laughed. “And threaten you with a good time?” Her brows had lifted, a smile peaking on the corners of her lips. “Naughty boy.” She nearly tsked, giving him a stern look and then a smile. As she made her way through the splayed open chain fence, she made note of her surroundings despite the lack of security. It was completely empty, and even some of the overhead lights weren’t on, making it look even more dangerous than the alley he found her in.

“Yeah this place is seedy as fuck.” For what it was worth, she didn’t mind. At least there wasn’t a bunch of annoying kids or so many prying eyes to watch them as they dug through trash. Most people made their noises and comments, but there was the once in a blue moon narc on more than one occasion. “Shut up.” She groaned, eyes rolling seconds after he started in on her but she was all the more amused with the delight it brought him. She felt like she was hot and cold with him, like every so often she’d slip him a little treat.

He seemed even more delighted to rile her, and probably find out just how far a line he cross before she really was serious. But anger was hard for Dylan, because it wasn’t a primary emotion it always trickled from something else. It was a swift switch and one that for the most part remained dormant, leaving her to plateau in her indifference. “I wouldn’t get angry.” Telling the truth, she watched his eyes as they danced, like she was about to say something so wild or brash it might be worth the captivation. It caught her attention, and for a split second even at their distance she watched his breathing hitch with excitement and it delighted her, too. “I would have to choke you out, both hands, and leave you for the morning crew to handle, but that would only be cause you wasted my time and not cause you made me mad.”

[chocolate-teapots]

Façade: Chris Chambers

                              ━━━━━━━━━▲━━━━━━━━━

                             People change. 

                                        Not always for the better. 

                             ━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Warnings: smoking, mentions of death, mentions of suicide, bullying, swearing.

When you walk through the hallways in school, about a hundred faces pass you each time you pay attention and it's likely you recognise a few for being so precious in a certain period of your life but have now just drifted to a smile as they pass you, if you're lucky.

Before the wrath of high school began, there was a handful of tiny little guys that I clung to each day because it just felt right and because we were the outcasts forced together by the bad guys who were slapping us around each day just because we were a little different. It was these differences that brought us together and from that moment onwards we stuck together like superglue.

There was Teddy Duchamp, one of the most idiotic guys you would ever meet, who would do anything at all to keep the legacy of his father alive. His thick glasses were way too big for him but then again so was his heart. He tried to kill himself once, challenging a train on the tracks as we tried dragging him from there. That was a strange day.

Vern Tessio was at Teddy's side at all times despite being the inspiration for his meanest punch lines. He was an overweight kid, dressed as if he didn't belong with us, smart and nerdy. His brother was a part of Ace Merill's gang that painted our childhood years red and I didn't even want to know what went on at home so I never asked.

Gordie Lachance was one of my closest friends out of the group, he was an intellectual but too self-deprecating for his own good following his brother's death. His brother was great, everyone loved Denny including his parents, unfortunately, more than they loved their youngest. He was ignored at home so I always made sure to involve him, his big brown eyes glistening as I warmed his heart and showed him the things he never knew.  He was a talented writer, mustering the best storylines out of nowhere for those empty silences at the end of the nights.

I missed him so.

Chris Chambers was my greatest friend out of the bunch and he was the true glue to the group, keeping the peace, fighting the crime and solving the problems. In the process of monitoring, he forgot about himself until he'd go home to a drunk of a father. I don't imagine there was one piece of furniture in that dull house that wasn't thrown at his pretty head at one point and that was by his father or his older brother, another one of Ace's accomplices.

Out of all the guys, only Chris was left with us. Teddy and Vern got transferred to another school after failing all their tests, they never were the academic sort and Gordie well, let's say life got a bit too much and people cared a little less at one point so he took his own life at just 16. 16 and dead, the newspapers relished in that title while his parents only wished it was sooner.

We all had the best times, chasing each other through trees, screaming along to the radio, blissfully unaware of what was to come to our pathetic little lives. What our older selves would become was a mystery that we didn't even care to think about.

I could see Chris Chambers grinning at my goofy jokes while kicking some rocks in the dirt but now we were in algebra and he was kicking the back of my seat harder than he would those rocks.

Before you assume, it wasn't because he developed feelings for me as this was real life where people could choose to present themselves in any way they wanted so they could make someone like me feel a little shittier each day.

I didn't bother confronting him, I just relished in the boy Chris Chambers once was, who I once really liked.

People chuckle as he continues jolting me in the chair, hair "accidentally" getting tangled in his fist sometimes that were plastered in fresh cuts and bruises.

One day we just drifted as he got a little smarter than he wanted to admit. One day his cute little cigarette fad turned into sex drugs and rock and roll with a gang of guys that looked exactly like the ones who used to keep him inside his locker.

He cried over this, becoming his brother and his father and not wanting to live up to society's expectations of him and yet he has become exactly that and then some.

I was staring at my paper in the busy class, getting confused about writing letters instead of numbers in math when the teacher decides to hand out the test scores in which Chris nearly mounts my shoulder to peak after he smirks at his own score.

I had to admit 36/80 was incredibly low for my average but I had been struggling, feeling alone and mostly missing my best friends.

"If you have any questions just come and see me but remember this is your ability, your effort and there is no special treatment, especially for slackers," the teacher affirms, beady eyes glaring at us all over his thin glasses.

"Sir?"

"Yes Christopher," his eyes drifted directly behind me.

The teacher at this point was probably in shock he had bothered to contribute to the class or even show up although he never seemed to miss this class, the only one we shared- the last thing we shared.

"Does Y/N here get special treatment considering she is now a retar- oh wait that's not right," he scratches his chin plastically.

"I believe the correct name for it now is mentally challenged."

I feel a thick cloud of nicotine on my neck with chuckles in between. There is a sea of chuckles however the teacher seemed to sympathise with me as the dark teen cloud rained over me.

Class ends without further confrontation and no reply from the teacher but a couple of high fives from those faces that I once recognised. People do change, it's not true what they say.

"Oops," he whispers as his hand wipes the contents of my bag onto the ground causing a thousand pairs of converse to trample on it mockingly.

I chuckle under my breath.

"Something funny?" he asks at the doorway, teacher fleeting with his mug as an excuse.

"You know I think you're hilarious Chris," I slowly stuff my things into my bag tidy exactly where they should be, "That is if that even is your name anymore. Probably cool white snake or something like that, one could even argue Ace Merrill..."

The eyebrow lifts, and more faces reappear as they keep walking by the classroom. He closes the door behind him in their faces and I'd be lying if I said I was intimidated at this point. I heard of the things he did but the person I knew I trusted with my tiny life back in the day.

"Stop this shit, you're just jealous because you're still stuck in the dirty blue sneakers that you used to run around in," he seems to drift to the past a little, eyes gaining a little bit of blue from the pitch-black they currently were.

"Yes, of course, I am incredibly jealous of you. I admire you Chris when you say 'Oh please love me, cool people, oh please, please, pretty please drag me into hell'."

Being mocked by a woman was infuriating for any man but Chris always hated to be mocked, mocking himself on a daily basis was enough for his fragile state when he was a kid. But, I didn't know this guy, who knows how he felt.

"Do you even miss Gordie?"

He is silent, unable to look in my eyes that were currently drowning in my own grief. It was true that I missed him with all my heart.

"I do, every god damn day and the guys. And, I envy Gordie right now as he never had to see the monster you became."

Silence.

"He's dead Y/N, he's not coming back."

I finally grab my stuff throwing the strap over my shoulder, not caring if I hit him since the mental torture he had done to me was enough.

I look over my shoulder, seeing a balled-up fist strikingly similar to his old man and his brothers.

"Gordie may be gone but it is you that's dead to me."

I couldn't bear to see that vein pop out like his old man when he was angry. His bad abusive temper had been passed down the generations like the fucking flu.

I didn't care if I had to live in that treehouse forever, leaping through the wood when 33 years old with taxes. If Chris Chambers was what it meant to grow up and abandon the golden years, consider me Peter fucking Pan.

[ofswordsandpens]

oh lord I remember being in the pjo tumblr fandom when BOO came out and it was the single biggest elephant in the room that I've ever seen. solid few months of everyone just waiting around for someone to be the first person to crack and say it was awful. in retrospect I feel so lucky to have experienced it in person LOL

the atmosphere of the pjo fandom post boo release is objectively hilarious now in retrospect but I remember just how absurdly tense it was during that time. I remember I solidly was trying to convince myself I liked the book even though I was disappointed but I remember a few people even immediately after the release were like "yikes that was not good" and they were being eaten alive by everyone else. Even by the time that I finally admitted that I didn't like the book I would get these messages defending Riordan's honor like "you're being so mean to rick he worked so hard :(" which is now just like funny to think about how much I was walking on eggshells back then to be like "oh no I know he worked hard!! I just didn't like these aspects :)" and now I can just say that book was a disaster in nearly every conceivable way and rick can come fight me in a denny’s parking lot and everyone's just like "word."

[selfshippingwhore]

•House Of Ashes Edition•

Brooke: Well, well, well... if it isn’t my old friend: the dawning realization that I fucked up bad.

•••

Brooke: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming

Jason: Does anyone in this godforsaken group ever think before they speak

•••

Brooke: Hey, you want some leftovers?

Jason: What's that?

Brooke: You've never had leftovers???

Jason: No, because I'm not a quitter.

•••

Brooke, to Jason: My life is in the hands of an idiot!

Jason, motioning to themself and Salim.

Salim: No no no no no, TWO idiots!

•••

The squad is trying to con some random guy

Brooke: Um, Jason, why are you pretending I'm this guy's family?

Jason: We need money!

Brooke: You're scamming him?

Jason: I was thinking more like flat-out stealing from him?

Brooke: What?! No way!

Jason: Why not? We already stole Salim!

Salim: Hey guys

Brooke: No, we didn't. Salim can think and talk for himself, he can do whatever he wants!

Salim: I wanna steal

•••

Salim: Why are Brooke and Jason sitting with their backs to each other?

Eric: They had a fight.

Salim: Then why are they holding hands?

Eric: They get sad when they fight.

•••

*Brooke's helping Jason out after they get injured, while the others are watching*

Salim: How does Jason look?

Eric: A little better than you, actually.

•••

Brooke: You are now one day closer to eating your next plate of nachos.

Jason: That's the most hopeful thing I've ever heard.

Salim: But what if I die tomorrow and never eat any nachos?

Eric: Then tomorrow is nacho lucky day.

•••

Brooke: On the count of three, what's your favorite cake? One, two, three-

Brooke and Jason, in unison: Chocolate cake peanut butter frosting with chocolate chunks!

Salim: Our turn, Eric! One, two, three- vanilla!

Eric, deadpan: I've never had cake, what is cake.

•••

*Brooke is cooking*

Jason: Any chance that’s for me?

Brooke: It’s for Eric. I’m planning on making some bad choices tonight, and I need them on my side.

Salim: I never realized the forethought that went into being a disappointment

•••

Brooke: *Screams*

Jason: *Screams louder to assert dominance*

Salim: Should we do something?!

Eric, observing: No, I want to see who wins this.

•••

Brooke: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!

Jason: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD

Brooke: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING SALIM WITH ME

Eric, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now

•••

Brooke: On a scale from “damn Daniel” to “fre sha vaca do”, how are you feeling?

Jason: In between “it’s an avocado, thanks” and “how did you defeat Captain America”, but as a solid answer I would say “I don’t need a degree to be a clothing hanger”. How about you, Salim?

Salim: Probably “road work ahead”.

Eric: I speak many languages, and this is none of them.

•••

Brooke: You know those things will kill you, right?

Jason, pouring another glass of whiskey: That’s the point.

Salim, smoking a cigarette: We’re trying to speed up the process.

Eric: *Nods while eating raw cookie dough*

•••

Brooke: I think Eric was right.

Jason: I'm surprised they haven't marched in here to say 'I told you so.'

Salim: They wouldn't do that.

Eric: You're right, Salim. For once in your life, you're 100% right. I would never say that.

Eric: *turns around, the shirt they're wearing says 'Eric Told You So' on the back*

•••

Brooke: Good morning.

Jason: Good morning.

Salim: Good morning.

Eric: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit.

Nick: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS

•••

Brooke: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me?

Jason: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it.

Brooke: Three of us saw it, Jason. How do you explain that?

Jason: *points at Salim* Sleep deprivation. *points at Eric* Paranoia. *points at Nick* Delusional personality disorder.

•••

Brooke: Poison is a magic transmutation potion that turns people into corpses.

Jason: This knife is actually a magic wand.

Salim: Meet me in the Denny’s parking lot for a wizard duel.

Eric: *cocks gun* Magic missile.

Nick: What the fuck is wrong with you people.

•••

Brooke: You're a loose cannon, Jason.

Jason: No, I'm not. I'm a cannon maybe, but a loose cannon? Is that what you think of me?

Salim: I think you play by your own rules.

Eric: No way, they think rules were made to be broken.

Brooke: Those are all attributes of a loose cannon.

Jason: No, I'm just a reckless renegade. Nick is a loose cannon.

Nick: *smashes a chair*

•••

Brooke: Bridge the generation gap by combining old and new slang into one!

Jason: Tubular AF!

Salim: Mood to the max!

Eric, annoyed: Groovy, I hate it.

Nick, just as annoyed: If she breathes, she’s a square.

•••

Brooke, trying to convince Nick to join the group: You know... I thought it'd be good to have someone come along who's really... strong!

Jason: And loud!

Salim: And grumpy!

Eric: And oblivious to reality!

Nick:…

•••

Brooke: Are we really going to let Jason keep Salim?

Eric: We kept Nick.

•••

Brooke: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life

Jason: Self-esteem, haven't seen you in years!

Salim: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this!

Eric: I knew I lost that potential somewhere!

Nick: My moral code, is that you?

Brooke:

Brooke: I was just gonna show you this cool trunk my mother left me but do you guys need a hug?

•••

*Squad reactions to being told ‘I love you’*

Brooke: Thanks fam!

Jason: oh no

Salim: *cries* I love you too

Eric: Sounds fake but okay

Nick: *A flustered mess*

Rachel: can i get a refund

•••

Brooke: Time for plan G.

Jason: Don’t you mean plan B?

Brooke: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties.

Salim: What about plan D?

Brooke: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.

Rachel: What about plan E?

Brooke: I’m hoping not to use it. Nick dies in plan E.

Eric: I like plan E.

•••

*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker*

Brooke: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.

Everyone:

Jason: ...I did. I broke it.

Brooke: No. No you didn't. Salim?

Salim: Don't look at me. Look at Eric.

Eric: What?! I didn't break it.

Salim: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?

Eric: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.

Salim: Suspicious.

Eric: No, it's not!

Nick: If it matters, probably not, but Rachel was the last one to use it.

Rachel: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!

Nick: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

Rachel: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Nick!

Jason: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Brooke.

Brooke: No! Who broke it!?

Everyone:

Nick: Brooke... Salim's been awfully quiet.

Salim: rEALLY?!

*Everyone starts arguing*

Brooke, being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it.

Brooke: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.

Brooke:

Brooke: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

•••

Brooke: Hewwo.

Jason: Hihiiiiii!

Salim: Greetings, Humans.

Nick: Three kinds of people.

Eric: I want pudding.

Brooke: Four kinds of people.

Rachel: WHAT’S UP FUCKERS?

Nick: Five kinds of people.

•••

*The squad right before Brooke's wedding*

Jason: Well I have to go, I have a wedding to attend.

Salim: Wait... Oh! I have a wedding to attend too!

Eric: Oh, I have a wedding to attend as well

Nick: I THINK WE ALL HAVE WEDDINGS TO ATTEND

Rachel, panicked: I THINK I HAVE A WEDDING TO OFFICIATE

•••

Brooke: Bye Jason! Bye Salim! Bye Eric! Bye Nick! Bye Jason!

Salim: You said ‘bye Jason’ twice.

Brooke: I like Jason

•••

Brooke: Favorite horror movie?

Jason: It

Salim: Saw

Eric: Annabelle

Nick: High School Musical. after watching it I spent all my middle school years terrified that the entire school would start singing something and I’d be the only one who didn’t know the lyrics

•••

Brooke: *Gently taps table*

Jason: *Taps back*

Salim: What are they doing?

Eric: Morse code.

Brooke: *Aggressively taps table*

Jason: *Slams hands down* YOU TAKE THAT BACK-

•••

Brooke: Jason, I'm sad.

Jason: *Holds out arms for a hug* It’s going to be okay.

Salim: Eric, I'm sad.

Eric, nodding: mood.

•••

Brooke: I trust Jason.

Salim: You think they know what they're doing?

Brooke: I wouldn't go that far.

•••

Store Worker: Would a Miss. Brooke please come to the front desk?

Brooke, arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem?

Store Worker: points to Jason and Salim

Store Worker: I believe they belong to you?

Jason and Salim, simultaneously: We got lost :(

Brooke: I didn’t even bring you guys here with me-

•••

Brooke: Jason and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us

Salim: *Sighing* What did Jason do?

Brooke: They chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and...

Jason: Who wants a steering wheel?

•••

Brooke, tending to Jason's wounds: How would you rate your pain?

Jason: Zero stars. Would NOT recommend.

•••

Brooke: Last night I found out Jason is a sleep talker.

Salim: Oh, really?

Brooke: "The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell." Right. In. My. Ear. At 3am.

•••

*playing twister*

Salim: Right hand red.

Jason: *ends up on top of Brooke*

Brooke: You're doing this on purpose, aren't you?

Salim: I stopped spinning like 15 minutes ago. Honestly, I'm surprised you didn't notice

•••

Brooke: Wow, Jason, you want to hold my hand before marriage? How awfully lewd of you.

Jason: We literally slept together yesterday.

Brooke: That's NOTHING compared to the lewdness of holding hands.

•••

Jason: Sorry I’m late, I was doing things.

Brooke: Hi, I’m ‘things’.

[laukora1030]

Captain America: The First Avenger pt. 2

First off, spoilers if you’ve never seen the movies and you want to. And, english IS NOT my first language, so excuse me if I make mistakes.

Y’all, this specific scene reminds me of that scene where Elastigirl is trapped in all those doors and she kicks the guys’ asses. Like, tell me you saw Steve hitting this guy’s head with the door and your mind didn’t immediately take you to Elastigirl. Or was it only me? Just me? Ok, let’s keep on going.

Nvm, I found out why it reminds me so much of that scene. They’re dressed the same way!

Can we acknowledge how awkward Steve’s interaction with the imprisoned soldiers is? Who told him it was a good idea to say “I’m Captain America” to these people? Although fair, he did get them out rather quickly and he is technically Captain America, but I don’t know, it’s weird. Steeb, you liar, you haven’t knocked Hitler out at all.

I love Steve’s loyalty to Bucky. It gets annoying in the next movies, but in this movie it just shows me how alone Steve was and how important Bucky was to him, because when you have very little people who care for you, your instincts will always be to protect them. 

I love the soldiers just wrecking havoc outside. It’s a fun scene seeing them fight back and use HYDRA’s weapons. How much property do you think they destroyed? Because I keep on wondering, did this act of rebellion from Steeb help turn the tide just a little bit?

There is a similarity between Red Skull and future Steve, and that is that, when they believe there is something more important than anything else, they are willing to sacrifice everyone and everything else for that. In this case, Schmidt was ready to destroy the entire base when he realized he was not going to win, just to save the studies, and future Steve was ready to endanger thousands of people to end HYDRA (CATWS), and to save Bucky (CACW). 

I feel sad for Bucky. He was tortured back in the 40s, then for 70 years, and then he died and came back to life, how does one survive that? He is one strong man, but I just, his entire life saddens me.

I wonder what Bucky thought after he heard Red Skull call Steve Captain America. I would find it hilarious, even in that situation, but that’s just my weird ass talking. Why did Schmidt think he was Erskine’s greatest success when he looks red and Steve looks like this:

America, explain.

Another note to self: Schmidt is a bitch, but I love his car and I would go back in time to the 40s to steal it. 

Bucky is so brave, though. He was tortured, experimented on, completely weak, and still, he put on a brave face and crossed that thing (I have no idea what they’re called) at a steady face, knowing that it could have fallen way before it did. Thanks to the Russo’s I had forgotten how much I loved Bucky Barnes. He is a great character. 

Let’s talk about how pure of heart, dumb of ass Steve is. He had no idea he was gonna survive his little stunt jump, yet he did it with little hesitation because “I have to get my friend out of here”. Pure of heart, dumb of ass. 

I can’t begin to imagine Peggy’s pain when she heard Phillips say that Steve was dead. Especially because if he was dead it would most definitely mean she would have no protection against whatever punishment Phillips saw fit for her actions. And yet she just won’t back down, because she knew she did the right thing. 

The scene where Steve gets back with the 107th is such a great scene, because it shows exactly what Steve is made of. He has a strong mindset, he will fight for what he believes in, and he would do anything for others. It’s a powerful scene.

I wonder if Steve unconsciously wanted the praise he got at that moment. He was the small guy his entire life, the one who was beat and punched on a daily basis, and for once in his life he was being praised for something he thought he deserved. I think that deep down this is exactly what he wanted: recognition.

I wonder if Bucky’s face when Steve stopped looking at him was because he thought he lost his friend, because he was jealous, or because he thought he wasn’t needed anymore. Bucky and Steve grew up together, and when you see a friend you’ve always helped become something better when you’re not with them, I think that can seriously mess you up, especially if you feel like they don’t need you anymore, because, after all, they thrived after you left. I don’t believe he was that jealous, though. Yeah, he used to be the strong guy girls would look at, and now he wasn’t, but I’m inclined to believe it’s my third option. He was so used to going around saving Steve from his death wish (that’s what I call it, because I’m still surprised he survived all those years getting punched), that now he sees Steve save him and save everyone else, and he knows that, were Steve asked to go alone to a fight, he would not be able to do anything. 

Steeb, you lil’ bitch, I know you don’t like cameras and stages, but that’s a medal of valour, I think it’s very important. 

Can we talk about how hot Steve Rogers looks with his army suit? Because he does. Also, as I’ve said before, he ain’t dumb, so, if everything got enhaced with the serum, he must definitely had his intelligence amplified, and I like to believe that he has photographic memory, that’s why he could remember the map he saw when he saved Bucky. 

I’m sorry, but what the fuck Steve? Who gave you permission to look like this?

(You’re welcome)

I like his team. Steve was always a good leader (I’m not even gonna touch CACW), he knew who to trust and who to take with him. Besides, like I said before, he is a great strategist. I think that’s what makes him such a great leader. 

I guess I get why y’all ship Stucky. I don’t ship them, I love their friendship (once again, I’m not even gonna touch CACW with a ten miles pole), and I think they’re sweet, so  I guess I can understand the ship.

Peggy Carter in a red dress is all I never knew I needed. She looks like a queen that will definitely punch you in the face if you deserve it. 

I love the bar scene. The music is lovely, Bucky’s awkwardness is hilarious, Steeb and Peggy flirting is sweet as heck, and Bucky’s “I’m invisible. I’m turning into you, it’s like a horrible dream” it’s the perfect dialogue. 

Okay, how did Howard get all of that glass on his face and didn’t get more than one single cut? Is he stronger than he looks or is it just movie magic? I guess we’ll never know. 

Awkward Steeb is lovely as heck. But I don’t like the blonde. I guess it’s because I am not a fan of stolen kisses, I feel they would make someone uncomfortable. 

Note to self: finally, a movie in sepia tones that isn’t situated in Mexico!

Coming back to the movie: the whole scene with the blonde woman is so freaking awkward. It was totally unnecessary. Like yeah, I get it was to show a jealous Peggy, but ugh, I hate it. Steeb looks son out of his element, it gives me that je ne sais quoi.

Note to self, again: if I ever want to date a woman, make sure not to talk to them the way Steeb did when talking about Peggy and Stark. Steeb, you idiot. 

Gotta go back on track. 

Stark said

The scene where Peggy shoots Steve’s shield used to make me laugh so hard when I was younger. Now it makes me irrationally angry. Peggy more so than anyone should know that bullets ricochet, she was lucky she that the bullets didn’t hit someone else after hitting the shield and just fell to the floor. 

Three things about the different scenes after this last one, the one where Steve and the Howling Commandos raid all HYDRA and Nazi bases they can: Steve looks so cool on his suit, I love Red Skull’s car, and the Howling Commandos are amazing. 

This is still sweet:

Bucky Barnes with a rifle could kill me any day, thank you. Also, I love this scene, it’s such an emblematic CA scene:

Oh oh, the train scene’s coming up next. What do I do now? Do I watch it, do I cry, do I suffer in silence (evidently no)? I was not prepared for this. I regret all my decisions up till this moment.

I’m never gonna get tired of saying that Steve is an amazing strategist. Just so y’all know, if it was me over the train, I would’ve already fallen to my inevitable death. Is it already clear enough that I love James Barnes more than I probably should? No? Then excuse me while I scream into the void aout how much I love this man. Also, him with short hair? 100/10 would recommend again. 

I love how battered (I think I used the right word) Steve’s shield is. It’s a representation of his battles and it’s, I don’t know, it’s calling me. I guess I love when something shows everything they’ve gone through.

Ahhhhhh, THAT part is coming and I’m not ready!!!!! James Barnes, if you read this, I love you. It’s a painful scene to watch, if I’m being honest. Steve loves this man, in my opinion, as a brother, and seeing him at death’s door, you can see the pain on their expressions, one knows they’re gonna die, and the other one knows they’re gonna lose their brother. I don’t think I’d be the same person if that happened to me. And Steve’s cries, bitch, my heart.

That killed me, sorry. 

I still admire Zola’s intelligence, and his sneakiness with the whole SHIELDRA thing. Like, I hate that bitch and I hope he died a very painful death, but he is a great character and I enjoy his scenes. 

Who eats steak with milk? I just wanna know, find me behind the Denny’s. 

I like the whole Zola and phillips scene, it makes sense, because of course he’d want to live. But tell me how you look at someone in the eyes and expect them to believe some bullshit about gods and infinite power? At least Phillip took the whole “his goal is everything” comment, because I sure as hell wouldn’t’ve. 

Red Skull’s little speech about the Valkyrie is okay, I guess, but he mentions something that reminded me strongly of CATWS. He said “If they shoot down one plane, hundreds more will rain fire upon them.” I’m just thinking about the Helicarriers that were supposed to just, ya know, kill everyone that posed a threat to HYDRA. I think it’s a good parallel. 

Note to self, again: I’m not gonna get tired of asking who was the idiot who decided to name this division HYDRA, made their slogan “if they cut off one head, two more shall take its place” then had their logo be an octopus without two extremities. Who do I have to fight?

I love the scene where everyone is screaming Hail HYDRA, because it shows you that, like Steve, Schmidt has presence, and a powerful voice, and he knows how to make people share his ideals. I enjoy it very much.

I feel sorry for Steve. I, listening to him talk to Peggy when he clearly has been crying, telling her that he cannot get drunk, which means that he’s tried it already, it’s a painful scene to watch. Chris Evans is such an amazing actor. He can emulate feelings so easily. Seeing him cry and suffer, God, it pains my heart. I honestly didn’t remember this scene, and to watch it without warning, well, it made me sadder than Bucky’s actual death.

“I’m not gonna stop until ol of HYDRA is dead or captured.” Brings a new light to CATWS for me, what about you?

I will leave it here, mostly because this shit is getting longer than I expected it to be. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy this as much as I did. See you tomorrow.

[sinnamonn]

Welcome to Hell Ch2. “Meet Mammon”

Gia meets their new guard demon, “Mammon”. It does not go well. Also because this is my fic and I can do whatever I want Obey me is now in the same universe as It’s Always Sunny.

Word count: 1.7 K

The demon pointed an accusatory finger at the redhead.

Gia resisted the urge to bite it right off.

“Listen up, because I’m only gonna say this once!” He barked, “If you value your life then you’ll hand over all your money now! And anything else of value!”

Was this guy for real!? This bitchass was trying to rob them!? Oh hell no, Gia was not going to get robbed by some twink that still used fucking axe body spray!!

“Otherwise I’ll wipe that—“

“Fuck that and fuck you!” Gia yelled, cutting the demon off mid-threat, “Listen here, asshole, I’m not getting robbed by some twink!”

“Who’re you callin’ a twink!?”

“You, dumbass!”

“You don’t know what you’re dealin’ with, little bitch.” He spat, snarling down at them. Gia only bit back,

“I’m dealin’ with a punkass that’s about to get their shit rocked!”

“Mammon! Shut up or I’ll punch you!” Lucifer snapped, “And Gia, language!”

And then Lucifer just punched Mammon, causing him to stumble back a bit while gripping his head.

“GAH, OW! Hey, what’s the big idea!?” Mammon whined, “I thought you were actually gonna give me a chance to shut up before punching me!”

Satan gestured to his older brother, “Gia, meet Mammon, Avatar of Greed. He oversees all forms of it,” he explained, “whenever he takes a liking to someone they suddenly find themselves awash in money.”

“And he’s a masochist, that part’s important~!” Asmo added, “So I can’t wait to see you put him in his place some more!”

Ok. Ew. Gia didn’t need to know that.

“I didn’t need to know that.” Gia replied flatly.

“And it just so happens I have a job for my masochist of a brother.”Lucifer stated, only to be cut off again by Mammon.

“Quit tellin’ lies! I ain’t asked for that punch and I ain’t a masochist!”

“Mammon, you are going to be charged with seeing to this human’s needs during the exchange.” Lucifer ordered, “I expect your full cooperation.”

“WHAT!?” Both Gia and Mammon yelled at the elder demon.

“Wha!? Why me!?” Mammon exclaimed.

“Yeah, why him!? He literally just tried to rob me!” Gia argued.

“As, lucky you, Mammon! I’m so jealous.” Asmo pouted.

“Then you take them!”

Wait no, Gia got the feeling staying with Asmo might just be worse than Mammon.

“Huh? Hell no. Watching them match your energy is too funny.” He replied quickly.

“You just said you were jealous!” Mammon all but screeched.

“Just give up Mammon. There’s no getting out of this.” Satan looked at though he was holding back laughter, “You know you can’t deny a direct order from Lucifer.”

“But why me!? Why can’t Beel do it?” He whined

“If we hand Gia over to Beel we might as well just tell him to eat them.” Asmo said, now scrolling through his DDD.

“Yeah, I can’t promise I wouldn’t.” Beel agreed.

“...Mammon?” Lucifer asked lowley , his tone was dangerous.

“W-What?”

“Surely you’re not going to tell me you object to this arrangement, are you?”

For the first time, during his introduction, Mammon was quiet. He only held a sour look on his face before loudly groaning, “Ugh, I hate you guys! Fine, I’ll do it, ok!?” His attention turned back to Gia, “As much as I don’t wanna look after you, I’ve got no choice. It’s a huge pain in the ass and I’m too important for this kind of thing.”

Sure buddy, keep telling yourself that.

“But Lucifer told me to do it, so I will. But in return you better not cause me any trouble, got it?!”

Gia took back what she first thought of Mammon. He was worse than the high school boys that got stupidly mad when you didn’t stand for the pledge.

“If you can stay off my dick,” Gia sneered, “we might have a deal.”

“Fine by me, human. Just don’t forget whose boss around here.” Mammon shot back.

“Now that that’s settled,” Lucifer cut in before Gia could say anything else, “Mammon, show them to the house and try not to kill each other.”

‘No promises.’ Gia thought, reluctantly following Mammon out of the hell.

———

That lack of depth perception was really biting Gia in the ass. They felt more like a bird trying to escape a hall of mirrors, bumping into and bouncing off of walls. It also didn’t help that Mammon was practically speedwalking away from them.

“Oi! Human! Would ya pick up the pace, we don’t got all night!” He shouted over his shoulder.

“Oh sorry! Lemme just pop my eye back in and magically gain perfect vision!” They sarcastically called back, “OH WAIT! I can’t!”

Mammon stopped mid-step before turning on his heel and striding over to Gia.

“Wait...you’re missing an eye?” He questioned.

Oh great, was he gonna do that mock-sympathy schick they got more than enough back in their world?

“Damn, Lucifer couldn’t even get a human with all their parts!” He cackled, clenching his gut, as if this were the funniest thing in the world, “He had to grab some broken fucking human! That’s hilarious! ”

Broken....

Did he really just call them BROKEN?

Gia saw red, their lip pulled back into a venomous snarl. How fucking dare he! They were a lot of things but broken was not one of them.

“Oh, I’ll show you broken!”

The redhead kicked the demon’s kneecaps with all this might.

“OW! YOU BITCH!”

Satan and Asmodeus watched as the two left for the House of Lamentation, absolutely transfixed on the two’s interaction. It was like one of Asmodeus’ trashy reality tv shows came to life, neither of them could look away.

“Uh, Lucifer, they’re already fighting.” Satan said, earning a groan from the eldest. Lucifer could feel a migraine coming on, a bad one.

“Oh my god the human just kicked Mammon’s kneecaps!” Asmo laughed, he was recording the entire interaction, “Oh he’s mad!”

“Shit, do I need to intervene?” He asked with only mild concern.

“Hmm, maybe..” Satan watched as Mammon grabbed for Gia, “wait, no he’s just carrying them back to the house.”

————

“PUT ME DOWN!” Gia beat on the demons back, “This is demeaning!”

“Just be happy that the Great Mammon was kind enough to help you!” Mammon shot back, “If you think this is demeaning then imagine how I feel! Why should I have to look after some human !?”

“ Um,bitch, I got isekaied to hell without my consent and now I’m stuck with a bunch of rich boys who reek of ‘I peaked in high school’!”

Mammon gasped, “I did not peak! The Great Mammon only goes up!I’m practically a golden god!”

Why did they feel like they heard that somewhere before? Maybe...back home? Oh shit yeah, Mammon talked exactly like this one guy who owned a bar they’d always go to when they were bored. Wasn’t his name Denny or something?

“And just so we’re clear,” Mammon continued, “it’s not like I can’t say no to Lucifer, okay!?”

Gia didn’t ask.

“I only agreed to babysit you because, um...Well you know, because…...uh…”

“It’s ok, take your time.” Gia said

“Grr! It doesn’t matter! Just don’t go thinking I’m scared of Lucifer or anything! Because I’m not!” He snapped.

“Uh-huh, sure.”

Mammon finally put them down when the two got to the house.

Gia whistled, taking in just how...elegant? No, elegant wasn’t the word they were looking for? A better way to describe the house would probably be maximalist. When they entered they were met with a double stairway accented by two gigantic gargoyle statues. Purple wallpaper clung to the walls littered with paintings of people, Allistar Crowley being the only one Gia recognized.

“This is the House of Lamentation. It’s one of the dorms here at RAD.” Mammon explained, stepping forward, “Well, it's not just one of the dorms. It’s the dorm reserved for student council members….and you I guess.” Mammon prattled on, mostly about himself, “Lucifer, Asmo, and the others take every chance they can get to insult me. Callin’ me scum, sayin’ I’m a money- grabber and stuff…..”

Gia was really only half paying attention, they opted rather to try and figure out who the other people in the photos were. Cultists, perhaps?

“...In other words, I’m a big shot. A real big shot. Like, even other big shots are impressed by—hey are you even listening!?”

“Hm? Sorry, what? I got distracted by the pictures.” Gia gestured loosely to the walls.

Mammon growled, “I was just saying, don’t you go thinkingI’m just some ordinary demon. I’m nothing like those other peons walking the halls here.”

“Ok, cool. Figured as much.” Gia shrugged

“So I suggest-wait what?”

“I figured all of you were pretty powerful, why else would Diavolo leave me with all of you? Demons eat humans, so you put the human with your most powerful and loyal demons as protectors.” Gia elaborated, “So that implies that you’re the most trustworthy and capable of this task, right? Even if you did..try to rob me. But why else would Lucifer and the rest of your brothers leave me in your care?”

Mammon stared wide-eyed down at Gia, they could practically see the gears turning in his head—wait did his cheeks get darker?

He turned around before Gia could really tell, “Well-I’m—I mean!—Duh, of course the Great Mammon is capable!!” He sputtered, “B-But don’t think flattery is getting you anywhere! You’re still just some stupid human!”

“I wasn’t trying to, it’s just logic.”

“SHUT UP. Just-! Let’s just go to your room, OK!?”

Instead of lugging Gia over his shoulder, Mammon instead grabbed their wrist and began dragging them up the stairs, avoiding looking at them.

“Ow! Fine! Lay off the dragging, though!”

Gia’s room was cottagecore as fuck. That was the only way they could best describe it. The room looked like it had been taken out of a fairytale book, it wasn’t exactly Gia’s style but they could appreciate the aesthetic. Objectively, the room was very pretty. That idea was hammered in the more Gia explored it.

It was bigger than the apartment they shared with their mom. In truth, it was more like a closet that somehow fit a bed and dresser.

“Holy shit this bed is soft.” Gia commented once they flopped onto the comforter, “And these pillows! They’re not flat! I forgot they could be fluffy.”

“Oi, human, I got some advice for you,” Mammon leaned over the bed, “ If you wanna survive even a day here in the Devildom, you’d better listen real close to what I’m about to say.”

“Aight.” Gia turned their attention back to the demon.

“If it ever looks like a demon is about to attack you..run. Either that, or die.” Mammon said grimly.

“That’s...Honestly not the worst advice I’ve ever gotten.” They replied.

“How about I vote you to die, Mammon!”

Gia jumped at the new voice, shooting up out of the bed and looking towards the door frame. There stood a pissed off looking guy with purple hair, glaring daggers at Mammon

“AH..! Levi…!” Mammon exclaimed.

[datleggy]

But to piggy back on your other anon, Christopher, Harry, or Denny brings home a bad grade on a report card and one of the parents are talking about it and Buck over hears and just freaks out because he doesn't want the kids to get the same punishments that he had growing up, queue horrified realization.

Good People. Bad Parents.

tw: abuse 

Buck comes limping out of the lockers, freshly bathed, hair still wet and curly at the ends, a complete turnaround from earlier, when he’d jumped down into the sewers for a rescue mission.

“How’s the leg?” Bobby meets him halfway and despite Buck’s insistence that he’s just fine, the Captain helps him get over to the lounge, where he can sit and rest comfortably.

“I’m good.” It was just his ankle, after all, nothing too bad. Not as bad as falling face first into the filthy sewer water when the unmaintained ladder he was climbing down decided to snap in two. The drop hadn’t been too far down, thankfully, and Buck had come out of it relatively unscathed, save for a twisted ankle and some minor scrapes and bruises.

“Give it here.” Eddie gently raises Buck’s injured leg so that it’s resting atop his lap and places a cool ice pack over the inflamed ankle.

Buck hisses at the cold but doesn’t complain, letting Eddie take care of him.

Chim leans over with an alcohol swab and starts disinfecting all the little cuts and bruises on the side of Buck’s face and his elbows. “Stay still.”

Buck whines. “But it stings.”

Bobby rolls his eyes, smiling at the bickering. “Chim, be nice.”

Buck sticks his tongue out at Chim and Eddie laughs at the indignant look on his face. Hen joins the crew a few moments later, having hung up the phone with her wife, sighing as she sit down.

“Everything alright?” Bobby asks, tilting his head curiously at the sour look on her face.

“Denny stuck a piece of gum in his hair at school today.” she huffs out an irritated breath. “Karen’s pissed. She had to take him to get it cut out, it was so glued in there.”

Chim’s eyes go wide. “God, not the hair.”

“She’s gonna send me photos later, I don’t even want to see.” Hen shakes her head. “He’s in big trouble when I get home, though, you can be sure of that.”

Eddie grimaces in sympathy with her. “I don’t know what I’d do if Christopher did that. Abuela is obsessed with his hair---she’d be devastated.”

“Hey, Buck, you alright?” Bobby asks, noticing how stiff Buck has gone since the start of their conversation. Pale, too. Did he manage to catch something, trudging down there in the sewers today?

Buck blinks, “Huh?” he shakes his head. “Yeah, yeah, um,” he turns back to look at Hen, his brows knitted together in concern. “He’s just a kid, I’m sure he’s sorry.”

Hen scoffs. “He’s sure as hell gonna be; I’ve told that boy a million times to stop playing with gum, I don’t even know where he got some.”

“I mean, it’s just hair,” Buck gulps, “It’ll grow back.”

Chim shrugs. “Maybe it’s cause I don’t have kids of my own yet, but I gotta say, I agree with Buckaroo here. What’s the big deal?”

“We’re lucky he stuck that gum in his hair and not a classmates.” Hen groans. “If you let ‘em get away with the small stuff later on it’s mayhem, trust me.”

Eddie nods in agreement. “I remember I cut my sister’s hair into these ugly ass bangs when I was around Christopher’s age. It was right before picture day, too, I was grounded for like a month.”

Buck looks at him, surprised. “Just grounded? I would have gotten the hard side of the belt for something like that. Or at least made to sleep outside.”

Chim balks. “Wait, back up, your parents made you sleep outside?”

Eddie almost loses his grip on the ice pack. “And did you say the hard side of the belt?”

Buck stares at the both of them like they’re the ones who aren’t making any sense. “Well, yeah, duh.” he shrugs. “They were strict. It wasn’t that bad. Like, if I got a bad grade at school I had to sleep outside and skip dinner or something. It wasn’t always the belt.”

“They wouldn’t let you eat?” Bobby can feel his pulse skyrocketing, he’s so mad.

“No, but that’s only if I messed up in school.” Buck reasons, confused by the abject horror on everyone’s faces.

Hen is reeling. “Buck, that’s not---wait, even in the winter? They would make you sleep outside then?” 

“No, of course not.” Buck denies. “They’d just make me sleep in the basement. It was still pretty cold and they’d get mad if I tried to turn on the lights, so it was kind of scary,” he admits, “But still way better than sleeping in the snow.” the way Buck says that, sounds like he’s talking from experience.

“Buck, is that why you don’t want me to punish Denny?” she asks, soft.

“Denny’s a good kid.” Buck insists, biting his bottom lip nervously. He was a rambunctious, loud and frankly, annoying kid, he deserved everything he got. “He doesn’t deserve to get punished.”

“Neither did you.” Bobby interrupts firmly. “Buck, I think Hen meant she was going to ground him, or maybe take away a toy he likes to play with, right?”

Hen nods. “Of course. Buck, I would never hurt Denny or punish him unfairly.” she reassures him. “What your parents did to you was not ok. You know that, don’t you?”

Buck shakes his head. “I wasn’t exactly the easiest kid to deal with.”

“No kid is.” Eddie retorts. He wants to take a plane to Hershey and have a talk with the Buckleys. “That doesn’t mean you put your hands on them or kick them out of your fucking house, Buck.” 

Buck shakes his head again. “They didn’t actually kick me out, look, just forget I said anything.” He ignores the pain in his ankle and the chorus of people calling after him as he makes him way to the bunks, where he can rest in peace. They have no idea what they’re talking about.

His parents were good people. He was just a bad son.

That’s all there is to it.

---------------------------------------------------------

It’s quiet in the station when Bobby finds Buck in the kitchen, looking for leftovers. He’d fallen asleep and consequently missed dinner earlier. 

“I saved you a plate, go sit, I’ll heat it up for you.” Bobby says.

“You don’t have to, I can---”

“I want to. Now go, let me do this for you.” Bobby leads an unsteady Buck to the stool and makes him sit and take pressure off of his swollen ankle.

Buck rests his elbows on the table and leans forward. “It wasn’t that bad.”

Bobby turns around, “I’m here if you ever want to talk. You know that, right?”

Buck huffs, frustrated. “You’re not listening. I don’t want to talk, I don’t need to talk, because it really wasn’t that bad. They were a little strict, it’s not a big deal.”

“Buck, if Harry got a bad grade at school, would it be ‘no big deal’ if I decided it was fine to let him sleep outside for the night, just to teach Harry a lesson? Would it be ok for me to hit him with my belt or make him go to bed hungry?”

“No, but that’s different, Harry’s not---” Buck stops, his fists clenched on the counter top. “He’s not a bad kid...” he finishes, in an almost whisper.

Bobby walks over and rests a hand on Buck’s shoulder. “Neither were you.”

“You don’t know that.” Buck argues, though the fight is gone. 

“I do. Because I know the kind of man you are now, and that’s a good one. One I’m proud to have on my team.”

Buck bites his lip, looks up through suspiciously wet lashes at Bobby, unsure. “You are?”

“Buck, I know I don’t say it a lot, but you’re important to me and I love you.” he squeezes the shoulder under his palm. “And I’m here for you, son. We all need help sometimes, and according to what a very smart young man once told me, all you have to do is ask.”

Buck’s face crumbles and Bobby is there to wrap him in his arms before Buck can fully utter the word help.

He holds Buck tightly, one hand at the back of his head, pulling him in so that Buck’s cheek can rest on his shoulder. “You’re so good Buck. You deserve good things.”

Buck lets out a convulsive little gasp; he’s trying hard not to outright sob but Bobby’s not making this easy. He doesn’t want to risk waking everybody else up. Partly because he’s embarrassed, but mostly because he’d like just a few more minutes of this. Of being able to soak up the warmth of Bobby’s affection.

Eventually Buck forces himself to pull away, swiping at his eyes surreptitiously. “I’m ok.”

Bobby looks skeptical at best, but doesn’t say anything. Instead he takes the leftover food out from where it’s been warming in the oven and serves Buck a hearty plate. They sit together in companionable silence, Buck’s chewing the only sound. He only eats about half the plate, but it’s better than nothing, Bobby thinks, as he takes the rest and wraps it up to put it in the fridge.

“Thanks Cap.” Buck stands up, looking lost, torn between wanting to go back to bed and maybe hitting the gym. He doesn’t quite want to go to sleep just yet. But he knows if he makes too much noise this late at night he’ll risk waking up the rest of the 118.

Bobby sees right through him. “Come on, sit with me a while, I’m not tired yet.”

Buck limps over to the couch, huffing when he sits. “You don’t hafta stay up with me.”

Bobby turns on the TV, the volume low enough that they’d have to strain their ears to really hear anything. “How else am I supposed to figure out what types of forks I should be buying for the kitchen?” he nods at the infomercial playing.

Buck rolls his eyes, trying to hide his smile. “You can’t buy those. They’re so ugly.” he plays along.

“I don’t know,” Bobby counters. “The lime green really pops. Do you think Athena would let me get a set for the house?”

Buck laughs, softly. “I’d pay money to see you try.”

------------------------------------------------

Eddie wakes up before five in the morning and the first thing he does is check on Buck’s bunk, only for it to be empty. 

He panics for a moment before realizing the Captain’s bed is empty too.

Eddie quietly makes his way to the lounge area. He finds Buck and Bobby on the couch, sound asleep. Buck’s head is on Bobby’s lap, and Bobby’s hand is resting right over his shoulder and forearm, fingers grazing Buck’s chest.

Eddie breathes out a sigh of relief.

Buck is going to be ok.

They’ll make sure of it.

[autistic-stedebonnet]

Mako’s Journey in Learning to Love Theater Kids

Chapter 1/?

In which Mako does in fact, go to plays.

notes- this fic is abandoned, don’t read if you don’t like being disappointed

-----

Mako didn’t go to plays. He went to his baseball games because well… they were his games, so that’s a given. He went to Korra’s swim meets, Bolin’s soccer games (before he quit to pursue his dreams of something or other. Mako had stopped paying attention after the 7th insane ambition)  and occasionally those mind-numbing competitions for Asami’s robotics club. Ok, they weren’t really mind-numbing, everyone there was just like, really smart and kinda made him feel like an idiot. Not to mention, Varrick is the chaperone for the robotics club, and they don’t exactly get on too well. Varrick is also the theater teacher, as well as a chemistry teacher, Mako isn’t exactly sure how. Before you ask, no it’s not Mr. Varrick. Varrick insists on being called by just his last name (or maybe it’s his first name, Mako’s never really bothered to ask. Bolin probably knows) But that’s off topic.

Mako did not go to plays under any circumstance whatsoever. But Mako also didn’t disappoint his younger brother who -without consulting anyone mind you- had gone and not only joined the theater program, but gotten the lead role in the next of the school’s terribly written plays. Bolin said that it was sheer, unadulterated talent. Mako preferred to call it ‘no one else auditioned, idiot.’ So, in conclusion, Mako went to plays under ONE circumstance.

--- “Kill me.”

Korra snorted as Mako slumped down in his seat, looking much too like a disgruntled Lin than he’d ever dare admit to. Asami shot a deathly glare in her direction before patting Mako’s shoulder sympathetically.

“I’m sure it won’t even be that bad.” 

“Wow Asami, you’re a great liar!”

“Korra! Not helping!”

Mako sighed. “No Korra’s right-”

“As always.”

“-it’s gonna be terrible. You two don’t have to go to fucking Denny’s after with 3 dozen theater kids.”

Korra burst out laughing and Asami grimaced.

“You don’t have to go. Can’t you just drop Bolin off?” The latter suggested.

“No.” Mako snapped. 

Mako had a problem with leaving Bolin alone anywhere. According to his therapist, it related to the trauma he had from spending ages 8-14 on the streets, where leaving Bolin alone meant leaving Bolin to be stabbed in an alley and left for dead. Mako thought that was stupid. He didn’t have trauma. His therapist knew nothing and the only reason he still went was because it was either that, or Lin sent him to Air Temple island for a month hoping that their sickening happy-go-lucky shit would rub off on him just enough that he’d stop thinking everyone was out to kill him. 

Korra leaned over the table and stole one of Mako’s fries, not bothering to finish chewing before responding. “Boyin uh ee fine!”

“What?” Mako and Asami said in unison.

Korra swallowed with a dramatic eye roll. “Bolin’ll be fine. He’s 16, he-”

“No.” 

The subject was dropped and Bolin sat down beside Mako, out of breath and grinning so wide to the point that it was almost unsettling. “Who’s excited for the play tonight!”

“Whoopee.” Mako grumbled, resisting the urge to slam his face into the table. --- “What the fuck is that costume!?” Mako cried, staring at a smiling Bolin pictured on the front of the program.

“Mako!” Asami scolded. “It’s starting.”

Right. Think before you speak Mako. Not everything that comes to your mind is socially acceptable to say out loud, don’t- Shut UP. 

The lights faded and a horribly composed piano piece began playing. Mako was about 90% sure that someone was backstage letting a cat walk across the keys. Bolin waltzed out on stage followed by Korra’s gigantic polarbear dog, Naga, that she’d apparently volunteered for the play. Mako was pretty sure she was getting extra credit in Chemistry for doing it. And- oh.

 Mako snapped his head over to look at Korra and Asami, the former of which was holding back laughter to the point of tears while the latter slapped her hands over her mouth, horrified.

“What the hell is he wearing? It’s even worse than the one in the picture!” Mako hissed. “Is that even allowed?!”

“Raiko’s gonna have a fit!” Korra wheezed, earning several glares from the surrounding audience.

“Isn’t this set in the South pole?” Asami asked. 

Korra nodded. “Oh yeah he’d totally be dead from frost bite.”

“My brother is a moron.”

“Who was in charge of the costumes?” Asami whispered.

Korra giggled. “Probably Eska.”

Mako raised an eyebrow. “Your insane cousin?”

“That’s the one.”

10 minutes later, Korra leaned over and whispered to Mako, “If it makes you feel any better, I’m pretty sure this is satire. Remember that mover from last year that was supposedly based on Southern Water Tribe culture, but was just a whole mess of cultural appropriation?”

“The one from that weird Earth Kingdom director that dressed everyone like… well like how Bolin’s dressed, and only cast two people actually from the Southern Water Tribe?”

“Yea, I think they’re kinda mocking that. Varrick’s from the Southern Water Tribe, so it’d make sense.”

“That does explain why Bolin keeps ‘accidentally’ referring to everyone as Earth Kingdom citizens.”

“And why he’s dressed like that.”

“That too.”

“Although that might also be to distract from the terrible dialogue.” 

“Distract- Korra! Please don’t make me think that everyone in here is ogling my brother.”

Korra shrugged and Asami swatted her on the arm, shushing them both. 

“Spirits! Mako, Asami!” Korra whisper-shouted, breaking the silence that’d lasted all of 45 seconds. “That’s the kid that kept hitting on me a few years ago.”

“Who?” Mako turned to her, brows furrowed. “There’s like 5 people up there.”

“Wu. He transferred here the year after you and Korra came.” Asami explained.

“Yea ok, but-”

“He’s the spindly kid who looks like a 12 year old next to Bolin.”

“Korra!” 

“Am I wrong? And besides, he was a jerk to me when we were 14, I’ll call him scrawny as much as I please.”

Wu. Huh, he’s kinda cute. Mako’s thoughts dared to say. Wait, what?! No he’s not! I mean, I’m straight!

“I think he’s gotten better.” Asami said, but she didn’t quite sound like she believed herself. “He hasn’t hit on me since a couple years ago.”

“It’s probably internalized homophobia.” What the fuck Mako, learn to shut up dammit. 

Asami’s eyebrows shot up and she grinned all too knowingly. Korra just about broke her neck swiveling to face Mako. “Probably what?”

“In-internalized homophobia.” Mako stuttered. SHUT UP! “Y’know the whole, hitting on every girl in sight to seem like, super straight?”

“What would you know about that Mr. Heterosexual?” Korra replied.

“Nothing!” Thank the spirits it’s too dark for them to see your face, you probably look like a tomato-carrot!

“Korra,” Asami scolded, skillfully fighting back a laugh of her own. 

Mako shoved his face into his scarf and muttered a slew of profanities that’d make Lin proud. A few minutes passed before he looked up, thankfully finding both Korra and Asami focused on the play. He could get through this. Only an hour to go, plus intermission. He was gonna kill Bolin after this. --- “Mako!” Bolin cried, bounding up to Mako, thankfully dressed in his normal clothes again. He threw his arm around his older brother and grinned. “How excited are you to meet everyone.”

“Oh, so excited, ” Mako deadpanned.

Bolin stuck his bottom lip out in a pout. “Mako buddy, don’t be so grumpy! You’re gonna love everyone.” He smiled earnestly and ran out to the car, waving to about 5 people along the way.

Waving. Mako knew that his brother had more friends than him, it’d always been like that. Bolin was the friendly one, the funny one. But it was still surreal seeing him close to people Mako had never spoken to. Everyone liked Bolin. 

“Mako! Earth to Mako!”

Mako shook himself from his reverie and started the car with a sigh. “We’re leaving at 10 on the dot.”

“Awww, Mako!” Bolin whined, turning his polarbear dog eyes on Mako. “C’mon! That’s only two hours!”

“It’s two hours too many.”

---

I really hope you like chapter 1! I’m always open to feedback :)))

@chi-blocker-ty-lee @linbeifuckmeup

chapter 2

[justfangirlthings2003]

Wally loves everything about Dick - his eyes, his smile, his butt personality - but the one thing that he finds positively adorable about the acrobat was his obsession with elephants.

It was no secret that they are his favourite animal; everyone that knows him well knows that Zitka and Eleanor were his best friends back at the circus. His favourite pyjamas growing up were the elephant print ones Bruce got him (his second favourite ones were his Superman ones. 1. Because Uncle Clark is awesome. 2. Because that twitch Bruce got in his left eye whenever he wore them always intrigued him), he never went to bed without Zitka (his stuffed elephant) until he was 10, he had elephant socks, ties, towels and underwear, and even to this day, Wally can’t think about that time 9 year old Dick spent 15 minutes ranting about the ‘unfairness of hellhole zoos’ that wouldn’t allow him to pet the elephants without smiling (and when Bruce pitched in that Dick would give people heart attacks by climbing up the walls of the enclosure, he lost it). Hell, he wouldn’t go anywhere near a piano (even though he loved playing them) unless he knows for certain an elephant didn’t die for it to have been made.

After Dick moved out and was given free reign to design his own apartment. Literally everything he gets is elephant themed: matching elephant plates, bowls and cups (they are bright blue with baby pink elephants and are obviously for kids), elephant curtains and cushions and an elephant wall hanging thing (you know those dangly things with bells and feathers that look like the ends of dream catchers) (all of these things were really cheap - he got them at the sale aisle of a store) (everything else in his one bedroom apartment is very very dirt cheap [he wanted to distance himself from Bruce so he didn’t touch his trust fund but allowed Clark, Louise Lane, Barry and Diana to pitch in {read they practically forced him to take some of their money after he left Gotham} if they allow him to pay them back after he got a job {they refused to accept his money} so he allowed himself to go a bit crazy with the elephant theme - he spent eight years growing up in a cramped two-room trailer, he knows how to live on a small budget)

His coworkers at the BPD know that he loves elephants so they always gift hims something elephant themed for his office: he’s got an elephant calendar, an elephant print bean bag and a mug with a cartoon elephant on it. Secret Santa for him is really easy (one time he got a knitted scarf with elephants sewn on the edge. He wore it for four months straight). One day he got sent to the hospital for getting shot on duty and the whole precinct (by that I mean the officers that weren’t corrupt) sent him an elephant plushie (he even got a few knitted woolly ones) so that when Wally arrived, he saw his boyfriend laying in his hospital bed, in the middle of these toy elephants, looking like he was heaven.

Wally knows that it isn’t just some quirky little obsession though - his love for elephants comes from his love for the circus. All of his happiest memories came from his past in Haly’s where his life wasn’t tainted by death and murder and the horrors that Gotham had to offer. So he surrounds himself by what makes him happy - his connection to his childhood with his mother and father. So Wally hasn’t got the heart to say that it’s too much because his love for animals is one of the few things this world hasn’t taken from him, so he’ll be damned if he makes Dick lose that as well. Even if he has to buy nine canary yellow pillows with bright green elephants on them after buying an elephant themed bath curtain (the smile on Dick’s face is so worth it)

And when Wally comes home after a mission that lasts for more than one day and sees an 18+ year old Dick clutching onto Zitka in his sleep, he just smiles.

BONUS:

A few days before their anniversary, Kid Flash was in Central City fighting a bad guy when he saved a toy store that sold huge stuffed animals (you know in Hotel Transylvania 2 when it shows Dennis’ bedroom and he’s got this enormous bear that reaches the ceiling, yeah it’s like that - also in Iron Man 3 when Tony gave Pepper a giant bunny, yeah that was there). The owner was so grateful that his shop was saved, he promised to give Kid Flash anything he wanted.

On the day of the anniversary, Dick walked into their apartment to see the biggest stuffed elephant plushie in his life. It was bigger than their couch and TV (how the hell did he get it through the door) and had a red ribbon tied in a bow around his neck and a tag that said ‘Happy Anniversary, Babe’. He spent three hours clinging onto it and almost fell asleep on it.

Let’s just say that Wally was very lucky for the next few days.

[weirdagnes]

💄RUDOLF’S DRAG RACE AU 🏁

ALRIGHT SO this AU originally started in our Yeah We Outlasting discord server, artists started drawing the characters in drag and I WOKE HMSHD real shit man. So I'm making a masterpost for drag au on behalf of the server✊✊

Outlast 1 = Season 1

Outlast 2 = Season 2

Whistleblower DLC = All Stars

All of the characters and ideas for the characters were written in collab with @gothivican, @panopt1c0n, @grahaam and the rest of the lads in the server, y’all have such beautiful brains. So anyways.

Here are the judges:

Rudolf Wernicke. Lowkey bias, literally goes to the backstage and tells Miles to beat Billy Hope in a lipsync because Billy can't continue on the show for some reason. Has favoritism towards Blaire, but was forced to sashay him away by the other two judges. Also this bitch is dying, literally has a breathing tank support behind his chair.

Pauline Glick. A very sharp critic. Wore the same shoes? Call out. Oh that's your signature makeup? UGLY tone it down. Sorry, the colors don't match, you'll be in the bottom two for that.

Paul Marion. The kindest judge. He will give constructive criticism in the nicest non-offensive way possible and compliment them after (because he would feel guilty about it).

Alice as guest star. Supportive as f u c k, huge fan, she cries when meeting the queens in Untucked. She can't help complimenting the queens every 10 seconds, she gives off the Leslie Jones’ enthusiasm.

Lisa Park as guest star. Like Alice, very supportive. She’s an artist, and will break down all the reasons why they are so good from an artist’s perspective. Crushes HARD on Wyssle Blower, she might’ve given her number after the show.

Lynn Langermann as guest star. She’s a judge, and she will judge. Gives out well constructed criticisms to all queens fair and square until she saw Angel Fromm (Blake) and just says “Wow what’s there to criticize?” Sallyzekiel hates her, Valentina and Angel on the other hand loves her very much.

 Here are the queens:

Miles Upshur as Kill-O-Meter. Primarily an insult comedy and rocker queen, and specializes in dancing. She tends to be criticized for a lack of glamour on some of her main stage looks, and is one of the most dramatic, sarcastic and shady queens of the bunch. Can and will stomp on you in latex boots for money. Besties with Wyssle and Chrisel, gets into a little heated talks with (occasionally) Peacock, (frequently) Ricky and Remy. She adores Cheets’ (Pyro) makeup skills. Winner of season 1 babey!!

Chris Walker as Piggy Chrisel. A punk/grunge queen who seems to specialize moreso in dancing and lip syncing. She's a shy, gentle giant, has a little trouble speaking coherently and it affects her in the acting/impromptu comedy challenges. She will call out whores though, she will kick ass when the situation calls for it. Really good at makeup, makeup girl-friends with Cheeto and besties with Kill O Meter (Latrila vibes). Also a perfectionist and hates mess on her work table.

Rick Trager as Ricky Trix. Whore, that's all. This bitch OBNOXIOUS and shady but she's both a glamour AND comedy queen, the other queens are watching out for her since day one. Horror and '80s inspired queen, extremely good at comedy and acting and will literally stomp the competition with nearly perfect impressions and extremely expressive acting. The downfall for her seems to be glam on the occasion and singing. Rivals with Kill O Meter and Miss Tini, kikis with Remy (they throw shade to other queens the moment they get em)

Father Martin as Miss Tini. The oldest queen but she can still serve the cakes. Generally a kind person, coming from a religious background. She’s takes the drag culture religiously. She gets along with The Twinks.

The Twins as The Twinks. Was recruited as two totally separate queens, but both quit on the first episode when one of the twins were to be eliminated. The queens tell the Twinks apart by who’s bald and who’s not. They don’t vibe with other queens except Miss Tini.

Pyromaniac as Cheeto de LaFlammeo. Queen of Makeup, she has some serious skill range on it. Good in the acting department, always plays as the tragic character. Was rivals with Kill-O Meter before, but one time when she had a breakdown, Kill-O Meter was by her side when no one was. After that, they respected each other.

Billy Hope as Billy Willy. CLOWN QUEEN, huge Crystal Methyd vibes. She’s the youngest queen, very energetic, a ball of SUNSHINE but Wernicke was a bias bitch and sent her home immediately the moment she was in the bottom. She was basically Kill-O Meter and Wyssle Blower's drag child. Hailed as Miss Congeniality, is voted by majority to return for a season 2 for going home a little too early than people feel was deserved. Best at makeup and outfits, her mom Tiffany taught her to sew and make dresses out of rags and other unconventional materials and the skill proved to be helpful. Also she likes puns and everyone likes playing with her name like: Silly Billy Willy, Witty Billy Willy, etc.

....

Waylon Park as Wyssle Blower. The Mom of the queens, the most well rounded queen, and the most 'fishy' one. Probably the smartest and most humble one out of everyone, she can read through people’s bullshit well. Genuinely looks like a girl in full drag, but always does her best on acting. She's serving you a cute, nerdy and quirky style, but can serve horror when need be. Always wins the mini challenges, she's not as loud as the other girls but she does beat Blaire in a lip sync (lowkey badass lipsyncer). Winner of All Stars babey

Jeremy Blaire as Remy Coco Ainée. Pretentious fake ass queen, even her drag name is just Cocaine in fake French. A pure fashion glamour queen, she serves it at almost all the fashion challenges but there's no more personality out of her other than that and her shady attitude (she will not hold back on the shade). Is extremely horrible at singing (her voice cracks) and acting, goes home against a lip sync with Wyssle. This bitch will FLEX her wins. Kikis with Ricky, mainly rivals with Kill O Meter, Wyssle and Peacock but she made everyone her rivals bc of her bitchass attitude.

Eddie Gluskin as Edna Taylor. Fashion queen, specializes in sewing, acting and singing, but is extremely lacking in the dancing department. Has a one-sided endearment for Waylon, and consistently tries to have her attention. Is extremely manipulative too, trying to consistently trip the other queens up. Also everybody hates her mohawk signature wig but nobody says anything about it because they don’t want to be victim to Edna’s mind games.

Frank Manera as Hanni Canni Bahl. Horror queen, best at comedy and dancing. Though it is prohibited, she’s able to sneak in weed, coke (for Ricky) and snacks in the werk room. Very messy when working, her discarded fabrics are EVERYWHERE and Chrisel is fighting the urge to clean it up. She eats while working when the camera’s off, and it stains the dress she’s working on (Pauline notices it).

Dennis as Denise. Mocked as “Edna’s little helper” as she always helps with her dresses. She’s trying too hard to impress Edna, and helps her get Wyssle’s attention. Very talented in acting and sewing, but bland in fashion, lacking in concept. Her inner conflict is what got her eliminated.

Simon Peacock as Julie Peacock. Rebellious, mischievous, and an ex-glam queen gone horror and campy instead. After being insulted much by glam queens (ahemRemyahem), she just embraced it and became a horror queen, serving the judges her horror aesthetic. Best at comedy, lacks extremely on acting and dancing though. No one is safe from her constructive criticism, and she will never stop ranting to Kill O Meter and Wyssle about Remy and Ricky being bad bitches and favored by Wernicke, she thinks it's unfair.

....

Blake Langermann as Angel Fromm. Singing queen!! Good at singing, but otherwise is moreso well-rounded, she might've been eliminated earlier, hadn't it been for her also low-key successful and iconic lip syncs. But the lucky winning streak didn't last forever, she goes home later in the season because she's slowly falling behind the other queens and can't keep up anymore. Has Rococo aesthetic, unfortunately the outfits can't make up for the lack of character as a queen. Though she needs a lot of improvement, the guest star Lynn adores her very much.

Val as Valentina. Queen of SEX or moreso impersonations and comedy. She’s a terrible tailor, but likes unconventional and simple fashion designs. She’s trans and lowkey Pauline has a crush on her the moment she walked on that stage. Pure rivals with Sallyzekiel, you know that iconic Aja vs. Valentina in Untucked? They had that moment. Probably goes home earlier, not entirely prepared, but still was a season icon. Definitely dropped it low about 10 times on her lip sync.

Marta as ImMartal. GOTH QUEEN, survived about early mid season. Best at her makeup and looks, glam queen, but the judges criticize her for wearing the same wigs/having the same hairstyle for almost every looks.

Nick Tremblay as Nicky Lanterns. Another gentle giant. Very introverted, she has a difficult time socializing with other girls because she’s generally not a very loud person. Really bad at makeup, her fashion sense is somewhat okay but it’s always on the ‘safe’ level. Pretty good at slapstick comedy, writing and concepts tho. It’s a wonder how Nicky and Lard Imp became “friends,” they’re complete opposites.

Laird Byron as Lard Imp. Whore, Exhibit B. Extremely rude, louder than Remy and Ricky themselves, and has a weird love/hate obsession with Angel for some reason. Everyone hates her, even Rudolf himself, and Lard Imp isn’t her original drag name but ultimately they came to a point where they just called her Lard Imp. Constantly denies the judges’ and the queens’ critiques, very delusional about winning the season and that’s why she’s the first one eliminated.

Sullivan Knoth as Sallyzekiel. The Big Bad Bitch of the season. Ultimate rivals with Valentina, constantly bullies Angel. Marta used to be friends with her, but after talking shit on Valentina, she says fuck you and defended Val. Glam queen, has an affinity for shoes but damn girl terrible makeup and padding. Really good with speech, acting and impromptu.

So far, here are the character designs we have made!

(1) Blake and Trager by @/pan0pt1con

(1, 2, 3, 4, 5) Waylon, Chris, Simon, Eddie, Miles and Jeremy by @/gothivican

(1) Billy, Miles, Chris, Wernicke, Pauline, Paul and Alice by @/weirdagnes

[parkerwhitmore]

𝑮𝑶𝑫𝑫𝑨𝑴𝑵 𝑴𝑨𝑵 𝑪𝑯𝑰𝑳𝑫 … a parker whitmore playlist

i. american idiot — green day;     ii. normal fucking rockwell — lana del rey;     iii. loser — beck;     iv. let’s spend the night together — david bowie;     v. the ballad of me and my friends — frank turner;     vi. troublemaker — weezer;     vii. the less i know the better — tame impala;     viii. you! me! dancing! — los campesinos!;    ix. walking on a dream — empire of the sun;     x. no. 1 party anthem — arctic monkeys;     xi. pork and beans — weezer;     xii. cpr — the walnuts;     xiii. take me out — franz ferdinand;         xiv. ringtone — 100 gecs;         xv. electric feel — mgmt;         xvi. money machine — 100 gecs;         xvii. you told the drunks i knew karate — zoey van goey;         xviii. do you want to — franz ferdinand;     xix. hand crushed by a mallet — 100 gecs;     xx. compensating — amine;     xxi. dumb bitchitis — yung cxreal;     xxii. 25 bands and a gecco — 100 gecs;     xxiii. smack a bitch — rico nasty;     xxiv. blackjack — amine;     xxv. say so — doja cat;    xxvi. spiderwebs — no doubt;     xxvii. dennis — roy blair;     xxviii. money in the grave — drake;     xxix. hey ya! — outkast;     xxx. shine — amine;     xxxi. 1, 2 many— luke combs;         

( 𝑳𝑰𝑺𝑻𝑬𝑵 𝑯𝑬𝑹𝑬 )

american idiot —  green day.

“don’t want to be an american idiot, one nation controlled by the media. information age of hysteria: it’s going out to idiot america.”

norman fucking rockwell —  lana del rey.

“goddamn man child, you act like a kid even though you stand six-foot-two.”

loser —  beck.

“and my time is a piece of wax: falling on a termite that’s choking on the splinters. soy un peredor. i’m a loser, baby, so why don’t you kill me? (gettin’ crazy with the cheese whiz!)”

let’s spend the night together —  david bowie.

“i’m going red and my tongue’s getting tied. i’m off my head and my mouth’s getting dry, i’m high, but i try, try, try.”

the ballad of me and my friends —  frank turner.

“and if you’re all about the destination, then take a fucking flight. we’re going nowhere slowly but we’re seeing all the sighs. and we’re definitely going to hell, but we’ll have all the best stories to tell!”

troublemaker —  weezer.

“i’m such a mystery, as anyone can see, there isn’t anybody else exactly quite like me. and when it’s party time, like 1999, i’ll party by myself because i’m such a special guy.”

the less i know the better —  tame impala.

“she said: ‘it’s not now or never, just wait ten years we’ll be together.’ i said: ‘better late the never, just don’t make me wait forever.’”

you! me! dancing! —  los campesinos!.

“i always get confused, because at supermarkets, they turn the lights off when they want you to leave. but at discos, they turn them on. and it’s always sad to go, but it’s never that sad. because there’s only so many places you’re guaranteed on getting a hug when you leave. and on the way home, it always seems like a good idea to go paddling in the fountain. and that’s because it is a good idea. it’s like rousseau depicts man in a state of nature: we’re underdeveloped, we’re ignorant, we’re stupid but we’re happy.” 

walking on a dream —  empire of the sun.

“we are always running for the thrill of it, thrill of it. always pushing up that hill, searching for the thrill of it. on and on and on we are calling out and out again. never looking down i’m just in awe of what’s in front of me. is it real now? when two people become one.”

no. 1 party anthem —  arctic monkeys.

“and it seems as though, those lumps in your throat that you just swallowed have got you going: come on, come on, come on. come on, come on, come on: number one party anthem.”

pork and beans —  weezer.

“i’m gonna do the things that i want to do, i ain’t got a thing to prove to you. i eat my candy with the pork and beans, excuse my manners if i make a scene. i ain’t gonna wear the clothes that you like, i’m fine and dandy with the me inside. one look in the mirror as i’m tickled pink: i don’t give a hoot about what you think.” 

cpr —  the walnuts.

“and when i start to move. it’s not me, it’s just one final, desperate twitch. and when i don’t come to, punch the air and curse you god but please know it’s not your fault. you did your best.”

take me out —  franz ferdinand.

“so if you’re lonely: just know i’m here waiting for you. i’m just a cross-hair, i’m just a shot away from you. and if you leave here, you’ll leave me broken, shattered, i lie. i’m just a cross-hair, i’m just a shot, then we can die.”

ringtone —  100 gecs.

“my boy’s got his own ringtone, it’s the only one i know, it’s the only one i know. 27 missed calls, lighting up my cell phone. sending you text saying “call you when i get home.” taking off my work clothes, working in a cold one.”

electric feel —  mgmt.

“all along the eastern shore, put your circuits in the sea. this is what the world is for, making electricity.”

money machine —  100 gecs.

“hey there pissbaby, you think you’re so fucking cool, huh? you think you’re so fucking tough? you talk a lot of big game for someone with such a small truck.”

you told the drunks i knew karate —  zoey van goey.

“i am drunk and on a ladder, not the smartest way to start my night.”

do you want to —  franz ferdinand.

“when i woke up tonight, i said: i’ve got to make somebody love me. got to make somebody love me. and now i know, now i know, now i know, i know that it’s you. you’re lucky, lucky, you’re so lucky.”

hand crushed by a mallet —  100 gecs.

“i was trying to find a way to kill time. i didn’t even get to tell you goodbye. i was trying to find a way to kill time. now you’re gone and i can never say goodbye. this feeling’s going to my head, i’m thinking things i should’ve said. you’ve circled me inside my room, i couldn’t go another day.” 

2am —  bear hands.

“i would never ask you to do something i wouldn’t do. i would never lose you, at least i’d never choose to. all your friends are sober, yeah we’re getting older.” / “making love is fine but all i want is to forget how old i am. nothing good happens past 2 am. i put the ball in your court, text me back, i want a full report, i want cash in hand.” 

compensating —  amine.

“i fucked up once again, and you know that i’m never too proud to beg. it’s hard to admit that i made my bed, but you know imma always wish you the best.”

dumb bitchitis —  yung cxreal.

“i’m a dumb bitch, i ain’t done bitch. you better run bitch. ‘cause i got dumb bitchitis.”

25 bands and a gecco —  100 gecs.

“i’ve got 25 bands and a gecko, and i've got 25 cans of the pesto, and i've got 25 mans but they're dead though, and I've got 25 cans of the Red Bull.” / also. the dog bark solo. very parker. 

smack a bitch  —  rico nasty.

“she hatin' 'cause i’m up, you can tell on her face. i been eating so much, i've been saying my grace. when the times was rough, i would look up and pray: thank god i ain't have to smack a bitch today .”

blackjack —  amine.

“i’m too fly to fight, can’t afford my price. this a white tee, bitch bite me. i’m on the high, they on the low. you killin’ my vibe, get out my zone.”

say so —  doja cat.

“day to night to morning, keep with me in the moment, i’d let you had I known it, why don't you say so? didn't even notice, no punches left to roll with, you got to keep me focused, you want it, say so.”

spiderwebs —  no doubt.

“sorry i’m not home right now, i’m walking into spiderwebs, so leave a message and i’ll call you back. a likely story, but, leave a message and i’ll call you back. and it’s all your fault! i screen my phone calls.”

dennis —  roy blair.

“if you knew how many songs, i'd sing on the roof above my dad's garage. i'd probably quit it, singin men in the parks till the sunset. it was Ramadan, neighbor's rules, played hide and seek, hid underneath the poly chairs downstairs, had a swing set on the tree above my window. don't know which way the wind blows.”

money in the grave  —  drake.

“it's a big gap between us in the game. in the next life, i'm tryna stay paid. when i die, put my money in the grave.”

hey ya! —  outkast.

“now, what cooler than being cool? ice cold! i can't hear ya! i say what's, what's cooler than being cool? ice cold! alright alright alright alright alright alright alright alright alright alright alright alright alright alright alright alright!”

shine —  amine.

“i don’t wanna feel like i need ya. you’re a catch, but i’m not a receiver. i’m nervous what this might turn into, know my skin glows whenever i see you. that’s why i’m shining.”

1, 2 many  —  luke combs.

“there's no stoppin' me once i get goin'. put a can in my hand, man, i'm wide ass open. the tick-tock of that clock is like a time bomb. by half-past-ten, i’m half past tipsy. at quarter-to-twelve, man, i done had plenty. the countdown's on when the first beer hits me. 5-4-3-2-1 too many.”

[doof-doofblog]

"You're The Biggest Mistake I Ever Made!"

Tuesday 12th January 2021

Hello again everyone! Hope you're all keeping well! I apologise for this one being late, but I'm really looking forward to seeing what happens next, following yesterday's episode! I'm not going to waste any of your time and jump straight into it!

Firstly, I want to mention Frankie and Ben. With recent events spiralling out of control, poor Frankie has no idea how to cope with it all, knowing that Mick is her Dad and that her Mother is a paedophile! Ben and Callum find her at the Prince Albert and decide to stay with her to keep an eye on her as it becomes clear that she's been drinking all day! Ben seems concerned for his friend, he manages to sit down and inform her about the fight he had just witnessed outside on the Square, informing Frankie that Shirley had beaten a woman up on the Square, but refused to say who it was. Frankie seems to look suspicious, after Ben tells her this information, she takes a quick look at her phone and sees that she has many missed calls from her Mum, but chooses to completely ignore them! During her time in the Prince Albert, Frankie has been assumed as gay, first with Tina and now with this new lady working at the bar, calling her "Gorgeous!" - I mean, that does not necessarily mean that the girl was chatting her up, could be just a nice polite compliment, but Frankie seems to take it as another girl is once again chatting her up, she questions Ben why people assume that she's gay - but as soon as Ben makes a light joke, she snaps back at him, leaving Ben very surprised. He can see that his friend is struggling with something, will he manage to find out what?!

The next thing I want to talk about is Dotty's party, now there's quite a lot to cover here involving a number of characters. Firstly, that Sharon offers Dotty an olive branch and gifts her a crate of alcohol for her party. She informs the teenager that she and Dotty's Grandmother "Dot" have been close for years and she hate for them to fall out because of Dotty, she tries to inform her that she and Ian are just starting out and she should accept it and move on. However, during the party, Dotty can't seem to come to terms with Sharon's offer, it's only after some wise words from Jean that she decides to give the alcohol back to Sharon and informs her that she can't just forget what Ian did to Dennis. It would be wrong for her accept it, unfortunately, Dotty doesn't know about Sharon's knowledge of Ian's involvement in her son's death. But Dotty makes a statement, that she needs to think about who she's really married to, there is no misunderstanding and she knows exactly what Ian did! She made the very important point that maybe Ian can buy Sharon, but she can't buy her!

During Dotty's party, poor Iqra is stood on her own, but when Keegan and Tiffany ask where Ash is, she informs them that she's probably still working, the states that the girl is a workaholic! Only just a few seconds later, Ash appears from around the doorframe - it looks like she's already had a few drinks already, much to Iqra's shock! I do feel for Iqra during these scenes, as it looks as if Ash is slowly losing interest in her girlfriend. Even when Ash proposes taking the party somewhere else, Iqra questions whether it's a good idea, to which her girlfriend responds with "Well, you can just stay here!" - leaving Iqra visibly upset. Later, when Iqra and Jean find each other, Jean gives Iqra some wise words also. When Iqra informs her that Ash has changed since Jag's has been in prison, its as if she doesn't know what her girlfriend wants anymore. Once again, Jean plays the role of being everyone's agony aunt and gives Iqra some home truths to think about, also mentioning that she needs to live in the moment, she has her whole life to figure out what she wants, but while she's young, she needs to live in the now and enjoy it! But while Iqra and Jean are having this conversation, Ash, Peter, Tiffany and Keegan have gone to the Panesar's office, where they thought the party would kick off. However, it's only when Suki walks in and informs everyone to leave that it looks like the party's over. It's been blatantly obvious in recent weeks that Peter has been flirting with Ash, even before Suki comes in to ruin the party, he questions Ash on what his chances are of being with her, she looks tempted but gives him the blow that he stands no chance with her at all. But when Suki tells them to leave, as Peter grabs his coat, his wallet falls out, which of course, Suki takes pleasure in snooping at. But she seems either disgusted or stunned to find a condom in Peter's wallet. When he comes back to find it, realising that Suki has found the content of his wallet, he informs her that it's best to be safe. Suki seems interested to know that Peter is interested in her daughter, however Peter informs her that her feelings towards him are not mutual. But what happens next REALLY shocks me - Suki starts flirting with Peter! Informing him that she's just been on a date and that the obvious end result of that date has ended with her talking to him and not in bed with her date. Peter seems kind of shocked and embarrassed at the thought, but Suki informs him that passion doesn't stop at the age of 40 and drops the biggest flirtatious bomb of all and questions whether he'd like to find out!!! To say I was shocked is a total understatement!! I have no idea why Suki would even be interested in Peter, would it be simply to get her own back on Ian? Or to even cause a rift between him and Ash? Who knows?!

Also, can I just mention what an absolute inspiration Jean was during this episode! Regardless of having to deal with the possibility that her cancer is back, she puts on a brave face, with some gorgeous make-up, gets dressed into a stunning sparkly dress and attends Dotty's party with Mo! During her time there, she helps not to just one - but two people - Dotty and Iqra! Informing them to take a hold of their life, live in the moment and enjoy it while they can. Jean seemed to be really enjoying herself at the party and also seemed to be taking her own advice. When Iqra asks her what she wants, she simply gets up and says "I want to dance!" - Jean gets up onto the dancefloor and shows the young ones how to live in the moment. She's swaying her arms and legs and singing along to the music, eyes closed - actually living in that very moment! Jean was just beautiful tonight, an inspiration. I love her so so much! I want to applaud Gillian Wright for her performance as Jean, she's just a fantastic actress and plays the role of Jean so perfectly, I can't fault her at all!! Of course we don't know for sure whether Jean's cancer has returned, I pray to God it hasn't, but even so - she has given us a brilliant life lesson. Don't dwell on things, face life head on, enjoy it - because we simply don't know how long we all have on this Earth!

The final thing I want to talk about, of course is Mick and Shirley! After the events of what happened in the previous episode, Mick is panicking that his Mum is going to the police everything, about why she attacked Katy and that soon Mick's secret will come flooding out onto the Square. Linda tries to console her husband, but he states that he simply isn't ready for things to be revealed yet. I do also feel for Shirley during this episode, during her confrontation with Linda, she states that after learning the truth, she can't just stand back and do nothing! Linda pleads to Shirley not to call the police, she understands that she wants to help Mick, but doing this isn't the right way. She makes a very valid point that they are both on the same side here, they both want to be there for Mick, even though they both want to rip Katy's throat out for what she's done to him, but they have to do what's best for Mick and do things at his pace - otherwise it'll make the whole situation 10 times worse for him. Linda suggests that she goes round to their apartment and speaks to her son. It's this scene in particular which got me really emotional. Poor Shirley is in absolute bits, tears flooding down her face as she talks to her son about not being there for him and how she blames herself. She informs Mick that she didn't tell the police why she hit Katy, for his sake! She goes on to talk about not being able to be there for him whilst he was in care, she blames herself - not for putting him into care but also of what Katy has done to him. As a mother, she feels she should've known, she should've protected him. She is deeply apologetic towards her son. Mick doesn't say a word and listens very carefully to his Mother's words - it seems as this has been the words he's been needing to her, slowly and gently he leans forward to his Mum, informing her that all of this is not her fault, the only person to blame is Katy. He says those 3 small words that Shirley has been longing to hear for a very long time "I love you!" - Shirley's sobs seem to ease as finally the relationship between her and her son is rekindled. This scene almost made me cry - I also have to applaud Linda Henry for her performance as Shirley, another fantastic actress which EastEnders are extremely lucky to have! I have to be honest, Shirley is one of my favourite characters, I've loved her since she first appeared on the soap, she has so much fire about her and I love her so much!! EastEnders wouldn't be the same without her! Taking her own advice, that she wants to be there for her family, she wants to look out for her family more than ever now, she goes back to the Atkins household where Gray is waiting for her. She informs him that she's going to start looking for Tina, something isn't right and she needs to find her baby sister - the look on Gray's face is an absolute picture! Panic! Something tells me it's not going to be too long until his secrets slowly start to reveal themselves. What is he going to do now? How on Earth is he going to be able to stop Shirley from searching for her sister? What other low lengths will he go to?!

The final thing I want to mention is Max! After leaving Mick and Shirley alone to have their talk, Linda finds herself in the Vic. Max finds her sitting alone and approaches her, questioning the local gossip about Shirley beating up a lady, someone who's known to Mick. Linda attempts to ignore his questioning, informing him that it's none of his business and has nothing to do with him. Max seems really put off by this, he can't seem to understand why all of sudden, after their fling, Linda is back to being the doting wife. He asks her to please tell him, just to give him some kind of understanding as to why she's suddenly dropped him like a tone of bricks! He informs her that she doesn't have to stay with Mick out of duty, but Linda stops him before he can say anymore and informs him that it's not duty that she's staying with Mick, it's because of love. She still loves her husband very dearly. Bu Max refuses to give up and states that he can't understand that "One minute you're mine, the next -!" This really doesn't sit well with Linda and abruptly stops him once again, stating that she was NEVER his and that he was the biggest mistake she ever made, leaving the Vic and Max alone with the hurtful truth that she regrets their fling, even more so now.

Overall a very brilliant episode, powerful, emotional, inspirational! Everything you wanted really! I can't wait to see what happens next. Will Frankie be okay? Will she eventually be able to have a conversation with Mick? Who knows? I hope in time that Mick will be able to approach his daughter and they'll be able to come to terms with everything - together. What the heck is going on between Suki and Peter? Do you guys find that weird and disturbing as much as I do?! Plus, how is Shirley going to find Tina and will Gray attempt to stop her?! Oooo so many questions which I can't find out the answers to! I hope you've all enjoyed reading, I really enjoyed writing this post! Please feel free to leave me a comment, I'll always respond! Enjoy the rest of your day folks! Love you all xXx

[ireadyabooks]

The Best Summer Reads! 🏖

Even if you can’t read a book on the beach this year, it’s still summer! 

We’ve pulled together some binge-worthy summer reads that will have you swooning over an adorable romance or turning the pages of a fast-paced thriller.  

I Love You So Mochi by Sarah Kuhn

Kimi Nakamura’s mother disapproves of her passion for fashion design, and when they get into an explosive fight, Kimi's entire future seems on the verge of falling apart. So when a surprise letter comes in the mail from Kimi's estranged grandparents, inviting her to Kyoto for spring break, she seizes the opportunity to get away from the disaster of her life. And what begins as a trip to escape her problems quickly becomes a way for Kimi to learn more about the mother she left behind, and to figure out where her own heart lies. Start reading!

The Night of Your Life by Lydia Sharp

All year, JJ's been looking forward to going to prom with his best friend, Lucy. But nothing goes according to plan and the best night of their lives quickly turns into the worst. That is...until JJ wakes up the next day only to find that it's prom night all over again. At first, JJ thinks he's lucky to have the chance to get innumerable chances at perfecting the night of his life. But each day ends badly for him and Lucy, no matter what he does. Can he find a way to escape the time loop and move into the future with the girl he loves? Start reading!

Lie to Me by Kaitlin Ward

Ever since Amelia woke up in the hospital, recovering from a near-death fall she has no memory of, she's been suspicious. Her friends, family, and doctors insist it was an accident, but Amelia is sure she remembers being pushed. Then another girl is found nearby -- one who fell, but didn't survive. Amelia's fears suddenly feel very real, and with the help of her new boyfriend, Liam, she tries to investigate her own horrific ordeal. But how can she tell who's trustworthy, and who might be -- must be -- lying to her? Start reading!

Screenshot by Donna Cooner

Skye's social media game is always on point. Until her best friend, Asha, films an embarrassing video of Skye at a sleepover and posts it online. But Asha quickly deletes the post, so everything's okay. Right? Then Skye gets an anonymous message. Someone has texted her a screenshot from the video. This person threatens to share the shocking photo online . . . unless Skye does whatever they say. Skye's perfect image -- and privacy -- are suddenly in jeopardy. What will Skye do to keep the screenshot under wraps? And who is trying to ruin her life? Start reading!

Listen To Your Heart by Kasie West

When Kate’s best friend, Alana, convinces Kate to join their high school's podcast, Kate is not expecting to be chosen as the host. But to Kate's surprise, she turns out to be pretty good at the hosting gig. Then the podcast gets in a call from an anonymous guy, asking for advice about his unnamed crush. Kate is pretty sure that the caller is gorgeous Diego Martinez, and even surer that the girl in question is Alana. Kate is excited for her friend . . . until Kate herself starts to develop feelings for Diego. Suddenly, Kate finds that while doling out wisdom to others may be easy, asking for help is tougher than it looks, and following your own advice is even harder. Start reading!

Wherever Nina Lies by Lynn Weingarten

Nina was artistic, fearless, and wild. She inked landscapes onto the soles of her Converse, and covered her tank tops in portraits of people she saw on the street. She was Ellie's big sister and favorite person. And then one day she was gone. Two years later, Ellie stumbles upon a drawing of Nina's that might just contain a clue of where to find her. So she takes off on a road trip with the one person who believes she's got a chance. Start reading!

Faceless by Alyssa Sheinmel

While on a run one day, Maisie gets into a terrible accident. A hot-burning electrical fire consumes her, destroying her face. She is lucky enough to qualify for a face transplant. But with someone else's features staring back at her in the mirror, Maisie looks -- and feels -- like a stranger. The doctors promised that the transplant was her chance to live a normal life again, but nothing feels normal anymore. Before, she knew who she was -- a regular girl who ran track and got good grades, who loved her boyfriend and her best friend. Now, she can't even recognize herself. Start reading!

It’s Not Me, It’s You by Stephanie Kate Strohm

Avery Dennis is a high school senior and one of the most popular girls in her class. But a majorly public breakup with the guy she's been dating causes some disastrous waves. It is right before prom and Avery no longer has the perfect date. Post-breakup, Avery gets to thinking about all of the guys that she has ever dated. Avery decides to investigate: she tracks down all of the guys she's ever dated, and uses that information, along with the thoughts of her friends, family, and even teachers to compile a total account of her dating history. Avery discovers some surprises about herself and the guys she's spent time with just in time for prom night! Start reading!

The Beautiful Lost by Luanne Rice

Ever since her mother left, Maia has struggled with depression -- which once got so bad, she had to go to an institution for a while. She doesn't want to go back. Maia's sure that if she finds her mother, if the two of them can talk about whale songs and constellations, then everything will be okay again. When Maia sets off on a road trip in search of her mom, her crush Billy unexpectedly comes along. They drive up the East Coast, stopping along the way for lobster rolls and lighthouses. Maia learns that Billy has dark secrets of his own -- and wants to outrun his past, too. But what will the future hold if they reach their destination? Start reading!

Where She Fell by Kaitlin Ward

Eliza knows the legends about the swamp near her house -- that people have fallen into sinkholes, never to be seen again, maybe even falling to the center of the earth. But when her best friends drag her onto the uneven ground anyway, Eliza knows to be worried. And when the earth opens under her feet, there isn't even time to say I told you so. As she scrambles through one cave, which leads to another, and another, Eliza finds herself in an impossible world -- where a small group of people survive underground, running from vicious creatures, eating giant bugs, and creating their own subterranean society. Eliza is grateful to be alive, but this isn't home. Is she willing to risk everything to get back to the surface? Start reading!

Lucky in Love by Kasie West

Maddie's not impulsive. She's all about hard work and planning ahead. But one night, on a whim, she buys a lottery ticket. And then, to her astonishment, she wins! In a flash, Maddie's life is unrecognizable. No more stressing about college scholarships. Suddenly, she's talking about renting a yacht. And being in the spotlight at school is fun . . . until rumors start flying, and random people ask her for loans. Now, Maddie isn't sure who she can trust. Except for Seth Nguyen, her funny, charming coworker at the local zoo. Seth doesn't seem aware of Maddie's big news. And, for some reason, she doesn't want to tell him. But what will happen if he learns her secret? Start reading!

Truly, Madly, Royally by Debbie Rigaud

Zora Emerson is not here to play. She's enrolled in a prestigious summer program, and is ready to use what she's learning to change the world. Zora's not expecting to vibe with any of her super-privileged classmates. So she's shocked to find she's got chemistry with Owen Whittelsey, who is charming, funny, undeniably cute...and turns out to literally be a prince. As in, his parents are the king and queen of a small European country. What? Suddenly, Zora's summer is looking a lot more complicated -- especially when Owen asks her to be his date at his older brother's wedding. Can her feelings for Owen, not to mention her sense of self, survive the royal chaos? Start reading!

Maybe This Time by Kasie West

Name the occasion, and Sophie Evans will be there. Well, she has to be there. Sophie works for the local florist, so she can be found at every big event in her small hometown, arranging bouquets and managing family dramas. Enter Andrew Hart. The son of the fancy new chef in town, Andrew is suddenly required to attend all the same events as Sophie. Entitled, arrogant, preppy Andrew. Sophie just wants to get her job done and finish up her sketches so she can apply to design school. But every time she turns around, there is Andrew, getting in her way and making her life more complicated. Until one day she wonders if maybe complicated isn't so bad after all. Start reading!

Snow in Love by Melissa de la Cruz, Aimee Friedman, Nic Stone, Kasie West

It’s still summer, but we’re already looking forward to the holidays and snuggling up with a mug of hot chocolate! So what's better than one deliciously cozy, swoon-worthy holiday story? Four of them! Snow in Love is an adorable, wintry collection of four short stories about the romance of the holiday season, from some of today's bestselling YA authors. Start reading!

Fake by Donna Cooner

Maisie Fernandez is fed up with the bullies who taunt her about her size and her looks. So, one night, Maisie goes online and creates a fake profile. "Sienna" is beautiful, skinny, and confident -- and soon she's messaging the most popular kids in Maisie's school. Maisie doesn't care about being friends with them. She wants to use Sienna to take them down. But as Maisie's web of deception grows, she's in danger of being exposed. And what will happen when the actual Sienna -- the girl whose photos Maisie has been using -- shows up in real life? Start reading!

Sorry Not Sorry by Jamie Reed

Janelle and Alyssa used to be best friends. They knew each other's deepest secrets and went through the hardest times together. But that was then. Now? Their status is somewhere between frenemies and full-on rivals. Until the day Alyssa collapses and is rushed to the hospital. Suddenly, everyone knows about her declining health and race against time. And, in a stunning twist of fate, the only person who might be able to save Alyssa's life -- is Janelle. But will the girls' bitter past get in the way of their futures? Start reading!

[naturaldisasterfanfiction]

28.

Robyn is staring at me with her lower lip hanging, first she is annoyed that our baby is not coming, she seems to be ever so comfy in her stomach “I am not a child Chris, I don’t need you here with me staring” I chuckled at her, she is a brat “you are baby, you’re my baby and somebody needs to be here while I go out, so we wait for mommy” I pointed at her, Robyn huffed out in annoyance “hey, calm down” Robyn put a finger up at me, I am going out to get Robyn some gift because she deserves it. I love her with my whole heart, and I want to spoil her, but I have to wait until Monica comes down, she is taking her time. Dennis has finally arrived downstairs “nice of you to join us, the baby is upset” I pointed at Robyn “why?” Dennis sat next to her “because she wants the baby to come now but then when it’s coming she will be crying, she doesn’t know what she wants, do you want it to arrive or do you not want it to arrive?” Robyn frowned at me “this is bullying, I don’t need you here!” she is getting annoyed “I think it’s unfair you’re not telling me where you are going, you could be meeting other women” she is annoying which makes me laugh “sure Robyn, I would never take Dennis with me. I mean why would I want any other woman, who would be as beautiful as you? I am so lucky to have you, also don’t be sat there wanting compliments” that is all she wants “no, I am just saying” now she is smiling, I love her so much “I can’t wait to tell the world you’re married to me, to show that someone wanted me because the way guys assumed I was not wife material, remember that?” Robyn touched Dennis’ arm “oh, Hassan saying that you weren’t worth marriage but for fun, I do. I think that was a turning point for you. Then you went through a phase of baggy clothes because you gained weight, bad times. But now look” I don’t get why people assumed Robyn was not wife material, what do they want.

What would I do without Dennis, I keep saying that to myself because he has been really helping me in London but I am trying to get used to it myself but today I am going into the city, which is scary because I will probably get harassed “does this mean I am going to be your bodyguard now?” Dennis asked, I laughed looking over at him “not the camera again, you love doing this” shaking my head laughing “it’s cool, I understand but I don’t think this will ever change peoples opinion on me, I think the hate runs deep with them and even when someone will watch this. They will still say I am just a bad guy; I made a mistake man. I made it when I was nineteen, and I continued to fuck up, I was lost. It’s just my name alone, it worries me. With my daughter, she hasn’t ever asked me, but I think she knows that I am different, people don’t think I am, but I am and it’s a hard thing to accept, when you got problems. But this won’t change opinions, they will bring up the same thing, and it sucks” I sighed out “but we going to see a guy I have linked up with here in London, I have got Robyn some things, spoil her. She deserves it, I am going Harrods to meet him but I am trying to be the best husband I can, nobody taught me that, nobody has ever taught me how to love either but my bad, I don’t mean to make this sad” I laughed, I probably made this so negative.

Dennis put his camera down finally “I want this to be a changer for you, I want this to be a point where people say he deserves the break. I want it to be that, for you. Like I see it, I am with you every day now. You are so nice, like to be your friend is amazing. To know Christopher, like Robyn says, it’s great. I honestly think people don’t know that and they see bad and when I edited some of the clips, I am seeing that. If I see then the rest will, this is what Robyn wanted from this, she wanted the people to see the good” smiling at Dennis “appreciate it, the non-drugged up Chris. It’s hard though Dennis, like I find it hard. I get those urges a lot, my emotions do be up and down at times and Robyn knows it. I know she knows my moods; I use it to fight my emotions. I use it to mask the real issue, but I am doing this for Robyn, like nobody else. Not even me, I love Robyn more then I love myself and I was and have always been so unhappy without her” Dennis eyes widened “wow, Chris that is very deep. To say something like that, to love someone more then yourself” nodding my head “it’s scary too but it’s true. I won’t change for anyone, but her. She is the reason, when I was annoyed with her at first with this, it was just that she left me and I wanted her. I hated she wasn’t mine, to love someone more then yourself, shows that I am depressed as fuck I guess” I laughed “no, don’t say that. Just that, she is like your muse. And that is ok Chris, it happens. You will be ok, and don’t ask but I was about to hold your hand” I busted out laughing because I was thinking what he was doing “this relationship is heading to new levels, I can’t deal” shaking my head laughing, Dennis is hilarious.

Going up on the escalators to the restaurant area here, it’s so far up “oh my god, it’s Chris Brown!! Oh my god” I internally died inside, the boy started running up the escalators that were going down “please, I love you” I laughed turning around, I just want to get there and see the man about the gear, now he has shouted that people are looking “I am not about to fight off these people Chris” Dennis said, stepping off the escalator “where we going” looking around Dennis came up from behind me “over here” he pointed “please, I love you. Please take a picture” he pleaded, I really didn’t want that and he actually ran back up “man, I appreciate the effort but I need you to not do that” this boy is near enough in tears “he isn’t taking pictures sorry” Dennis said “quick, hurry” I said, I just feel bad that he made the effort “thank you, I love you so much” nodding my head placing my arm around him, taking his phone from him and taking the picture myself. He is shaking, I feel for him “thank you” taking the picture even though he is crying “thank you, come” joining Dennis as we walked off, I will not be taking anymore pictures, I just want to get the shit and go, or eat I don’t know yet.

Harrods dining hall looks so nice “he is with me” seeing Scott walking over to us as the waiter was about to come up to us “Chris Brown, welcome to England” he shook my hand “nice to meet you, I know you could have come to the home but it’s a surprise and also Rihanna is not there for inviting people as of yet” he laughed “it’s ok, I don’t mind and you are Dennis?” Scott shook his hand “I am” I am getting a few glares “come with me, I have the jewellery” following behind him, my phone started ringing in my pocket. Getting my phone out from my pocket, answering the call as it is Mel “yooo” pulling the seat out to sit down “my weed man is outside the home and nobody is answering? Shall I just tell him to go or what?” oh yeah, I forgot he was coming “no tell him that I want it, can he just come later or something. Robyn won’t answer the door, she is heavily pregnant and at the end now” I should have waited “I get you; I will tell him to come later. Where are you? You supposed to be there with her!?” she yelped out “I know, but I am just here getting shawy gifts, you know how I am trying to be. I am trying to spoil her but please tell him later, I need it” I really do, I ran out a few days ago “I will, bye” disconnecting the call “order anything, I will pay” that is nice of him “sure, I am hungry” I might as well.

Scott poured me some more champagne “it’s nice to actually meet you, to meet the Chris Brown. But I know a lot of UK artists here that I can put you in contact with, I make jewellery for them all so you just keep my number with you and then when you got time, I can start helping you” placing the glass down “appreciate it, I don’t know much people here. I am only here for you know what but if you could get me in contact with some good artists here that would be dope” he seems like a good person this guy “funny thing is when I saw Chris Brown messaging me on IG, I was like oh shit, it’s dope. I am happy to show you the chains. Of course I did how you described” watching him opening a suitcase on the table “got to be safe now, this is Rihanna’ chain. You said you wanted it short, like a choker style but not too much, when I sent you the images, I made the chain thicker” he passed me the box “that is really nice” Dennis said, looking at the diamond encrusted name chain I like the Riri x Fenty thing, it’s cute. Yes, this is how I wanted it for her” closing the box and passing him back “and yours” we swapped boxes, opening the box “I was fully expecting that to say Chris x Riri” looking at Dennis “I was going too, see you know me so well but then I was like this baby really got me doing a lot, and also it’s only right I do this” Dennis smiled at me “yes my man, Riri x Fenty. I am happy with that” taking the chain out of the box “my other half, you going to help me put it on” I snorted laughing “I joke, I can do it” Dennis was going to help me too.

I am annoyed not going to lie, Mel said the weed man can’t come and drop it off to me now. Like I have to wait when I need it now, I am sick of this shit country already, I want a fucking blunt and now I can’t, shit is fucking wack and now I got to be all nice and smiley too because I prepared a movie night with Robyn, not I don’t want it because I am moody. This hurts my soul so much, not being able to have a blunt because this country doesn’t allow it, imagine if we were in Cali, I could just go and get some. Here it’s like a drug deal, it’s dumb and I hate it. I need to make my own drug dealing friends here, actually I know Hood got some niggas here, he may know a few people “I come here and you’re frowning” I didn’t notice she came up early “oh yeah” I got up from the bar stool “I ain’t got no weed, this is painful so I am like shit. Now what? I am not feeling too myself but it’s ok. I got you a gift, come” waving her over “I went out to pick them up, I made a new friend that is going to help me get more friends here, which I need but open it. One of them is mine but it’s whatever, go on look” sitting back on the bar stool, Robyn’ eyes lit up, she was not expecting this at all “for me? Oh ok baby, I am excited now. You didn’t have too, my love is for free” I shrugged smiling, Robyn opened the box, the right one because it’s her chain “oh my god, awww baby. I love it, when I can wear my baby name on my neck, I really do love it. Thank you, and this is yours?” opening the box to mine “so we got matching ones, just mine if a little longer. I got you around my neck forever and you have it too” Robyn squealed “I love shiny things, thank you” stepping down to hug her, she kissed my lips as we hugged.

I said movie night but as soon as Robyn got comfy and these couches are very comfy, but as soon as it started she just fell asleep, shaking my head smiling to myself. Reaching over, holding onto her hand first and she didn’t flinch at all, she is just asleep but she at peace and I can’t take that away from her, I am not going to start poking her to wake up. Placing my hand on her bump, my thump lightly stroking it. I should have just let her snuggled into me and sleep, that may have been best. I smiled to myself getting my phone out, turning to her. Unlocking my phone and tapping on Instagram, adding onto my story. Facing the camera on Robyn’ hand, tapping on record “can pregnancy make you this tired, she is out” holding her hand up with my free hand and then letting it go “she is out, and this was ten minutes into the movie” stopping the recording, I didn’t record her face, just her hand. Adding on a caption ‘baby forehead coming soon’ posting the clip onto my story, I just find it funny but I can’t move now, I have to stay here with her.