#i will draw this. eventually. winter break is soon and i am so fixated on gem rn

[mee1414]

Hmmm caribou Gem. Canadian deer. Also the only kind for females to also have antlers. Also theyre fluffy. Also their hooves are really interesting and make them really good swimmers and able to walk on snow which idk maybe has some significance cause iirc in secret life she got away a few times by swimming?? Maybe?? I havent watched in a while i may be insane

[pandawritespoorly]

With Time: Chapter 25 - Confrontation

Author’s Note: So, I know I promised angst, but while rereading this chapter I realized it really isn't super angsty. Mostly at the beginning, then it's a bit calmer. Also, this is the first time in a while but we've got a (drumroll please)...

Strong language warning!!! I guess that should be a sign of angst incoming.

This chapter includes the words 'bitch', 'asshole', and 'bitch' again. Enjoy!

Chapter Summary: Marinette sketches outside.

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Marinette is sketching outside. She isn’t quite sure what led to this, as it’s only late January and she really doesn't like the cold any more than usual.

Snow may be terrible, but it’s certainly pretty. Hence, the whole sketching-outside-thing. She’s bundled up with all her winter gear, though she’s had to forgo the usual thick gloves because she’s got to draw. Nothing spectacular, but enough that when she’s awake again in a few months she’ll have something decent to work with.

“Marinette?”

She looks up, taking a moment to adjust to looking at an actual person. Eventually the dark clothes and general appearance clue her in to the fact that Felix is standing in front of her.

“Hi.” It’s really all she can manage. She’s only capable of one (preferably simple) task at a time. It’ll take her a moment to speak properly.

“Is it wise for you to be outside in this weather?”

Her shrug is lost in her layers, so she gestures at her sketchbook. 

He only raises an eyebrow, ”Could you not sketch someplace warmer?”

A single blink is all he gets in response, so he sighs, pulling out a book, “In that case, I will be reading here. I will also inform the others that you’re outside, seeing as I still do not believe this to be a good idea.”

She nods, returning to her sketches, happy to have avoided switching tasks. They sit together in a comfortable silence as they enjoy their individual activities.

“It is you! Did you think you could show up around here without me saying something?! I have some choice words for you bitch!” A voice carries across the otherwise empty park. A third person has joined them.

Felix notices how Marinette immediately stiffens beside him - the fact it’s noticeable even through her layers is especially concerning. He looks up to see the source of the voice.

Oh. Her.

The group can easily recognize Marinette’s old classmates. Once they learned what had happened they wanted to be able to identify them in case she ever ran into that class with them. Alya is the easiest though, having met her in-person once.

“I think you should leave, Ms. Césaire.” He speaks harshly, having no patience for her.

“I don’t know who you are, but if you’re with her you’re either a bully or completely in the dark. Maybe she’s deceiving you too. I missed the signs.” Alya is wavering between fury directed at Marinette and sympathy for Felix.

“Neither of those are the case, you are misinformed, due to your blatant ignorance and inability to follow basic journalistic procedure.”

“Oh, a bully then. Birds of a feather flock together,” any sympathy is gone, and her face is hard.

“Neither of us are bullies. We do not deserve you coming after us in this manner-” “I know what she is-”

“We will be leaving now.” He stands, helping Marinette to her feet. She’s recovered from her surprise and is focusing on the ground. It’s honestly a relief her house is so close.

“She’s a manipulative, two-faced, liar, who beats up anyone that stands up to her and tries to ruin her facade-” Alya is picking up steam.

Marinette mumbles something, but it’s lost to the yelling. Felix continues to try and direct her to the house. The others were already planning on coming over, so they really just need to get past her.

“I regret that I ever called her my best friend, because she only ever does things for herself. The class is better off now that she’s finally gone and-” Marinette speaks again, but it’s still too quiet to be heard over the yelling.

“She’d been dragging the whole class down the entire time she went there! She’s worse than Chloe! At least she’s left to be with her own kind now! I bet she’s found a bunch of like-minded assholes to run her new school with.” Felix can see the other approaching, realizing what’s happening and hurrying. Even Adrien is exiting from fencing. Marinette won’t move. At least the others are here now. “Playing her little mind games and ruining lives behind the scen-”

“Would you jus- You’re wrong!” Marinette doesn’t even yell, but she speaks evenly, in a firm voice that startles Alya into a temporary silence. Marinette is barely holding herself together. She’s both physically and emotionally exhausted and has reached her limits.

Allan and Claude are at her side. Allegra leaves them to it, and turns to Alya. Felix sticks with Marinette as well, though keeps an eye on Allegra - her self-control may not be doing so well. Adrien arrives a little later, but he goes to Marinette without hesitation.

They all usher her inside, up to her room quickly. She’s hyperventilating, her breaths coming in short quiet gasps as she tries to pull herself together. Somehow she and Adrien’s hands have been linked, and she’s gripping his hand like a lifeline.

Allan is making quiet comforting noises, “It’s okay. It’ll be okay, ‘Nettie.”

Claude and Felix sit back, not wanting to crowd her.

Allegra arrives, looking incensed. She pushes that down in favor of focusing on Marinette.

“Oh, Mari, sweetie…” She sits near Claude and Felix, entirely capable of waiting for Marinette. Can’t this poor girl catch a break?

Marinette is really trying to do this right. She’s supposed to breathe. Why isn’t she breathing?

Because you’re stupid, and can’t do something simple.

No, no, no. She just told Alya that none of that is true. She’s fine. She shouldn’t be this upset. Why is she so upset? Idiot.

Obsessive.

Creep.

Untrustworthy.

No! She’s fine now, she’s better. None of that is true, that’s what she told Alya. Alya…

She yelled at Alya. What kind of friend…

Can’t do friendship properly.

Her head is spinning and she knows none of this is true, but it must be true. She’d backed it up with facts.

This is all her fault. She’s supposed to be reading it nightly, but she hasn’t read it since…

Since… 

The fact that she can’t immediately recall is a sign of how much she’s failed. She remembers now though. Last time was when Adrien found it.

No one was supposed to find it.

Failure.

She needs to get to her notebook. Things will make sense then. No one can know though. Adrien would be disappointed, and they’d all be disgusted by her horrible inability to follow such simple rules.

The notebook is near her bed. If she can get there…

They’d probably put her in her bed if she’s asleep.

She feels the pieces of a plan fitting together. Marinette gives into the exhaustion, but not entirely. It isn’t hard. With Allan and Adrien right beside her though, she only has to be careful not to slip too far. 

She’s barely awake. She has to keep her eyes closed, which only makes it harder. Loosening her grip on Adrien’s hand, and letting herself go limp, she lets herself float right on the edge of sleep. 

They don’t even let her reach the floor, supporting her as soon as she’s ‘sleeping’.

There’s murmuring, whispering as they talk amongst themselves. She really hopes they’ll follow the plan. She can’t check the notebook if this doesn’t go according to plan.

Marinette needs that notebook. The lists will explain everything, everything will be fixed.

Maybe she needs to sell it better?

She focuses on making her breathing even steadier, which really makes the whole not-actually-falling-asleep thing that much harder.

Nobody comments. Adrien’s hand finds her hair, combing through the tangles gently. Brushing it is too much work in the winter.

They’re mumbling, the soft conversation constantly mindful of her presence. Why haven’t they moved her yet? Why are they still here? Because they like you. They care.

What an odd idea. She likes it better than the lists.

The lists.

She needs to get to the lists.

She moves slightly, before remembering that she’s not supposed to be awake. Following the plan will solve this, so that’s what she does.

At her movement, there’s a brief silence, as though they’re waiting. After a moment, Adrien’s hand continue working through her hair, and she can tell he’s purring softly.

She loves him so much. He’s so sweet.

That’s not important right now. You need the lists.

The low voices continue, she still doesn’t bother to actually listen. That takes effort and she’d have to be less asleep.

“She isn’t sleeping yet,” Adrien confirms.

“Poor girl. It must be all the stress.” Allegra shakes her head.

“She’ll have to sleep eventually. She’s barely awake as it is.” Claude adds. “It’s time for you to rest, sweetie.” Allan tells her.

“I doubt she will be able to last much longer.” Felix agrees.

“That’s what you said last time.” “We all know that I am correct this time around.”

“Well duh, look at her. I’m almost convinced.” “Why are we so certain that she’s faking it? Is there any chance she’s actually asleep?”

“Her breathing isn’t quite there yet. She keeps twitching her eyes as if she’s about to open her eyes up and look around.”

“This girl.”

Marinette is so confused. Everything makes less sense when she’s tired, especially in the winter. Why isn’t she in her bed yet? Why was she trying to get there again? Something she’s supposed to check on…

While she’s trying to focus, she ends up fixating on the hands in her hair.

Adrien.

He had something to do with the thing, right? Focusing on him would help her remember. She’s sure.

The thing is, with her eyes closed all she has to focus on for Adrien is the fact that he is carefully and deliberately combing through her hair. He’s purring too. 

She’s always loved his purring.

Focus! She can’t remember her goal, so now she has a second goal, and now she will do it.

This plan is foolproof.

…

“Yeah, she’s definitely sleeping now.”

“Good!”

There’s a pause, then Allegra breaks the silence, “Oh, that horrible girl!” Her hands are clenched into fists, and she looks the picture of wrath.

“What’d you even say t’ her?” Allan asks.

“The truth. That she and the rest of her classmates are a bunch of bullies that can’t be bothered to do a google search to see what’s right in front of them!” She breaks off into a bunch of unintelligible angry muttering.

“Good.” Felix nods, “That is probably nicer than she deserves.”

“She walked away before I could say much. Ooh, I just-” Allegra cuts herself off, taking a moment to calm down, she turns to Adrien, “Is she going to be mad?” 

“Oh, I’m a dead man tomorrow. How dare I comfort Marinette.” Adrien groans, rolling his eyes, “Alya will kill me, if Lila doesn’t get my father to do something first. I think Lila suspected I still knew Mari when she saw us at the museum, so here’s her confirmation.”

“How does she even get away with all this? Don’t the teachers have to do something?” Claude interjects.

“I’m not experienced with how school is supposed to be, but Chloe says that this one is ridiculously hands off. They don’t get involved in things that they should, and when they do, it’s not the right way.” “What’s that supposed to mean?” “Whenever Chloe bullied Marinette, no one would talk to Chloe about it. If they did she’d just threaten to call her dad. If Marinette got upset, someone would take her out to the hall to tell her that she’s supposed to be the example for Chloe, so she shouldn’t get upset.”

“Excuse me?!”

“That’s not how it works!” “How is this school still running?”

“What kind of nonsense-” The others break into indignant protests on their friends behalf.

“I guess that explains a lot.” Claude sighs.

“Mhm.” Adrien nods.

“Poor baby.”

“She has us now.”

“And you still have to go there. All the time.”

“Yeah…”

“Murder. I’m going to do murder.” Allegra throws her hands in the air exasperatedly.

“Illegal.” Felix chimes in, “If you must, be sure no one knows it was you.”

“Guys. There won’t be any murder happening.” Allan warns.

“Not even a little?”

Allan shakes his head regretfully.

“Fine.”

“Can I say, that I’m just so proud of Mari? She stood up to Alya!” Claude is bouncing happily where they’re sitting.

“Three times, actually.” Felix corrects, “I doubt you could have heard from that distance, but that was her third attempt at speaking.”

“Even better!”

“After all that it’s no wonder she’s sleeping, poor thing must be exhausted.” Allegra sympathizes.

“We gotta’ make sure she knows that. The whole bein’ proud thing.” Allan adds.

They all nod in agreement. Marinette needs to know how important that was. She’s made so much progress.

“Should we move her to her bed? Or the chaise?” “That’d probably be good, but I’d hate to leave her. Also, she’s not exactly the easiest to remove from… anyone really.” Adrien points out.

“Not to mention the emotional toll!” Claude agrees, “She always looks so sad when you move her!”

---

Marinette comes to slowly, blinking a few times before she tries to sit up. As usual, she ends up resting heavily on Adrien.

“Hi, Mari.” Adrien says as she continues to adjust to being awake.

“Hi.”

“Do you want to talk?” Allan asks.

“Not yet.” She needs time to think.

She needs time to check the notebook.

“That’s fine.” He nods. “We are proud though!” Claude interjects. “What?”

“You stood your ground! You defended yourself from her and her nonsense!” Allegra agrees. “You recognized that she was incorrect, and you said as much to her.” Felix adds.

“Oh.” She blushes lightly, and smiles at them softly.

“There’s that wonderful smile of yours!”

---

It’s late now. The others have left - it is a school night after all. Tikki is asleep at her spot on the desk, and Marinette is sleeping in her bed.

Except she isn’t.

She sits up quietly, ignoring how the exhaustion she feels makes her head spin slightly. She really needs the notebook. Then things will make sense, and she can figure out what to do. How to fix things.

What is she fixing? Did she really do something wro-

You always do something wrong. This isn’t an exception.

She yelled at Alya. That’s right.

Opening the journal, she’s taken aback by the handwriting that is distinctly not her own.

 No Rules, Just Reminders-

You don’t have to smile all the time, it’s okay if you aren’t happy.

Crying is perfectly fine.

Apologizing is fine, but remember that not everything is your fault.

If you want to help someone, just remember that it’s okay to prioritize your needs too.

It’s perfectly fine to ask for help, people are more than willing to give it.

If someone asks how you’re doing, the answer doesn’t have to be ‘good’.

It’s okay to be tired, it’s okay to be sick, people care about your health.

Akumas are unpredictable, there’s no telling how long they’ll last, just try your best.

Akumas are no one’s fault but Hawkmoth’s, you aren’t to blame.

Honesty is a great thing, but sometimes it’s alright to lie, you have good intentions.

The people in your life care about you. They don’t ‘put up with you’, they love you, and you deserve that. 

No one is going to abandon you for a small mistake.

You aren’t a bad person, no one in their right mind thinks that.

You can make mistakes, the important thing is that you acknowledge them and learn from them.

You are trustworthy, and deserve the opportunities you earned for yourself.

You are a very likeable person, not a bad one.

Paris is lucky to have someone as spectacular as you as a hero.

If you attract an akuma, that’s okay. You’re allowed to have negative feelings.

You don’t have to carry the weight of the world alone, there’s no shame in asking for help. No one will look down on you for it.

People love you, Marinette. They’re not crazy, they’re right.

Be kind to yourself, you more than deserve it.

♡

 These aren't her rules. These aren't her lists.

This is Adrien’s handwriting, she recognizes it now. When-? What-? How-? Why-?

There’s a knock at her balcony, and she opens it hurriedly.

“Sorry to bother you, it’s just that I wanted to check on you- Claws In-” Plagg flies down to nap near Tikki, “‘cause it was such a stressful day, and I-” He notices her confused face, “...was worried. Wait, what happened?”

She only blinks at him, utterly baffled. He notices the notebook in her lap.

“Oh, Mari, Princess.” He quickly figures out what must have happened. She hadn’t checked the notebook since before he’d changed it. Old habits die hard, and today had clearly been stressful enough that she’d decided she had to resort to that.

“I just. The rules. I…” Marinette is still catching up.

“Why did you decide you needed the rules?” He barely catches himself from telling her that the rules were nonsense.

“I messed up today? I think? I’m confused, so I wanted help?” She gestures with the notebook helplessly.

“You could have talked to us.”

“But the notebook has facts, and I didn’t wanna’ bother you guys…”

“The notebook did not have facts. You wouldn’t have bothered us. We’re worried about you.”

“You’re not suppose’ to be worried about me! That’s against the rules! I think…?” she flips through the pages helplessly, as though hoping to find the answer.

“It isn’t.” he rests his hand on the notebook, drawing her attention back to him, “There aren’t any rules that you’re supposed to follow anymore. We’re worried because we care about you and you had a stressful day.”

“There are rules! I can’t break them.”

“Marinette. Remember? The rules are wrong. You and I went over that notebook.”

“Right.” She hesitates, “But that was before today. I yelled at Alya.”

“She was yelling at you.”

“But I des-” she cuts herself off, “I’m sure she had a reason?”

He sighs in relief that she doesn’t think she deserved that, “Even if she did, you’re allowed to stand up for yourself.”

She nods reluctantly.

“I think you should talk with the others too though. They’re worried. They want to be able to help you too.” “…what about you?” She's looking at him strangely. It’s vaguely familiar, but he can’t place it.

“Of course I-”

“No. You have to go there tomorrow. Alya will be mad. Will you be okay?”

“I’ll be fine. I’ve become a houseplant to them. I’m background noise - Lila’s armrest.” He shrugs, this is his norm.

Marinette doesn’t seem to have taken the same approach, “That bitch.” Adrien startles, at this, “All of them need to treat you better. This isn’t okay.”

“So they aren’t perfect, good people?”

“No! They’re mean to you!” She sounds indignant, “They just let Lila harass you and only encourage her! They shouldn’t be supporting that!”

“So maybe they were unfairly mean to you too?” he suggests.

“I… I don’t know,” she turns her head away, “It’s different.”

Placing a gentle hand to her cheek, he makes her face him once more, “I’m not so sure it is.”

A few tears escape, but she remains silent.

“How about this? The last thing you need now is to dwell on people who aren’t worth your time, so if you want to, we can put this conversation on hold until you’re ready.”

She nods.

“So what shall we do, princess? This loyal knight is at your service.” He bows dramatically as best he can while sitting on her bed.

The soft laugh he gets out of her is music to his ears.

“I don’t think I’m up for much,” Marinette admits sheepishly, barely getting the words out before a yawn over takes her. Her face flushes slightly.

A very Chat grin takes over Adrien’s face.

“No. Don’t.” Marinette glares at the boy, the look on her face finishing the thought for the both of them.

“Don’t what?” He is the picture of innocence.

“Don’t make a pun about-”

“A pun?! Why, prrr-incess, you wound me!” he puts his hand to his chest in mock offense, “I would never. Everyone knows that most puns are just pointless yawn sequiturs! I would never, ever, waste yo-”

He never gets to finish his sentence, as Marinette cuts him off by hitting him over the head with a pillow.

He squawks in affront, ducking under her next assault.

“How could you attack a defenseless kitten like that? And your best fur-end at that!” He reaches for a pillow, not about to let her get away with this. Not without a fight.

“Not with puns like that you aren’t!” Marinette aims the pillow at him again, but he just barely shifts out of the way in time to dodge the hit.

“Marinette!” He admonishes, “You shouldn’t insult a pun, especially before it’s fully groan! That could really hurt its shelf esteem,” he gestures beside him to her many shelves, grinning like his cheshire namesake.

His momentary distraction is all it takes for her to land another attack, wiping his smirk off with another pillow to the face.

Adrien takes his opportunity, dealing a blow to her side while she’s withdrawing her arms.

Their fight devolves from there. Swinging their respective pillows at each other wildly, they do their best to take the other down, despite being somewhat restricted by staying in the loft.

Eventually, they’ve both exhausted themselves - not that either of them would admit it, of course. As partners they are evenly matched and know each other far too well to give either of the pair a step up.

They sit on their knees on her bed, facing each other. Pillows rest in front of them, fight put on hold while they caught their breath.

“My first pillow fight,” Adrien manages between pants.

“Heh,” Marinette manages, “Congrats.”

“Which means I intend to win!” Before she can even truly register his words, he jumps towards her, scooping her up and holding her tightly.

“I won!”

She giggles, booping his nose, “That you did, mon minou.”

He bleps at her in response, and she returns the gesture. They both break down into a shared fit of laughter, one that doesn’t seem likely to stop anytime soon.

That is, until Marinette breaks into a yawn.

“Aww! Is the princess tired?”

She glares at him, sticking her tongue out defiantly, “No, I’m just-” she’s cut off by another yawn.

He grins, “Oh, is that so? Well, if that’s the case, then it’s my job as your partner to enforce your bedtime.”

“Adrien,” she gives him a look, but he doesn’t bat an eye. He puts the pillows back where they belong, though keeps her held close.

Turning around he flops onto the pillows, keeping himself propped up slightly. He tugs her hand lightly, trying to convince her to rest.

“Hugs? Purr-ty please?” He bats his eyes at her, “I’m touch starved and all that!”

Marinette gives a long-suffering sigh, the kind that only comes from having a superhero partner like him.

Adrien tugs her hand gently once more, and she flops forward onto him. She knows that if she could see his face he’d have that look. When he’s all too proud of himself for having gained the upper hand. Instead, she shifts herself to be more comfortable, resting her head against his chest, listening to his heartbeat. She drapes her arm across him, and he holds her closer to him with a strong arm on her back.

“Alley cat.” Marinette mutters with false bitterness.

He purrs and runs his hands through her loose hair, “I’m your alley cat though.”

“You are.”

She hums happily when his purr picks up at her words. The world begins to get fuzzy as she starts to get closer to the edge of sleep.

She thinks he may have shifted slightly to put a blanket over them, but they’ve returned to their original position before she can make her complaints known. This is probably the warmest she’s ever been, in or out of winter. Marinette can’t imagine how she survived last year, only seeing Chat and being able to cuddle with him during patrols.

Her mind floats around, not focusing on anything in particular. For now she is perfectly content to enjoy the moment. Adrien’s steady pulse and untroubled purring in her ear.

With snow coming down all the time, she is never fully able to relax. There is always that voice in the back of her mind telling her that she should be hibernating. That she’s not safe while she’s out and about.

And yet, now the voice is silent. Maybe drowned out by the purrs or just because she’s resting and inside.

She feels safe. That much is clear. And warm, not just because of the blanket. Adrien is a gift.

It’s unfair that he doesn’t know how great he is. He deserves to know just how much he matters to her.

“Kitty?” her voice is soft, barely audible even to her. She reaches over and grips his free hand in her own just to be sure she has his attention.

Little did she know she’d never lost it.

“Yes, Bugaboo?” He keeps his voice soft, having heard the sleepiness in her voice.

“I love you.”

He squeezes her hand, “I love you too, ma chérie.”

Evidently thinking the conversation is over, Adrien returns to combing through her hair.

“Kitty,” she starts again.

“Yes?” He’s patient and her heart swells.

Despite the fact that she isn’t at her most eloquent when on the verge of sleep, she tries her best, “Love you. Y’ make me feel safe… An’ warm… An’ you’re nice when I do som’thin’ dumb, and …you ‘re alw’ys patien’ wh’n I stutter’d… n’ you’ purr good...  Gab’iel is mean but you not, an’ you…” Marinette is talking herself into sleep, slowing down and stumbling over her words over, but Adrien hangs on every word, “an’ you re’lly good, an’ ‘re the bes’ par’n’er…” from there Marinette seems to attempt to say more, but it only comes out as mishmashed gibberish.

Adrien sits for a moment. Stunned. He already knew that she loved him - there wasn’t any doubt - but there is something different about someone listing off all the reasons they love someone.

He quickly realized he had been a fool, thinking he couldn’t possibly love her more than he already had.

“Thank you, Mari,” he manages. She gives a simple response of a light hand squeeze, humming happily. It’s not long until she’s properly asleep.

Adrien sits against the pillows, staring at the ceiling. He knows he has to leave eventually, but Marinette only just fell asleep. He’d hate to wake her up. She deserves the rest. Besides, there’s no harm in staying a little longer right?

He can feel her soft breathes from her spot on his chest, and his advanced ears can hear every inhale and exhale. Her soft hair is still tangled around his fingers. Everything reminds him of her, and he almost feels as though he’s going to choke on the love flooding his being.

Is it too early to think about his wedding vows?

---

Author’s Note: How about that ending? It was originally shorter and different, and, as much as I liked it, I felt like I could do better. Maybe I'll post the 'deleted scene' (if you will) some other time. Anyways, I really liked how that turned out.

What do you think of the 'No Rules, Just Reminders'? I based them mostly off of the original rules, as well as sprinkling in a few other things Marinette needed to hear.

As you can see, Marinette is definitely doing better. I like to think of the winter as a 'reset' for her. Pre-winter, she's focussed solely on how terrible she is. Of course, it's hard to focus on that and simultaneously stay awake and functional. Not that it fixed her, but it's easier to teach her healthier thinking patterns when she's barely able to think of how she's supposed to disagree. Does that make sense? I can clarify if necessary. I'm prepping this update again the night before (first time in a while) and listening to a true crime podcast at the same time. Tired + typing while listening = nonsensical results.

The next chapter takes place the next day, so we'll see how Adrien deals with school after this incident. There's a special surprise at the end of the school day that will definitely be... notable.

Thank you all for commenting so much! Also, if any of you checked my tumblr and are concerned (*cough*Claude*cough), I 100% guarantee that all these precious characters are definitely, completely, totally fine.

Anyways, I haven't been writing in so long, so that ending rewrite was a nice practice. I hope you enjoyed!

Thanks for reading! Feel free to leave any thoughts, theories, constructive criticism, or anything really in my ask box, in replies or through reblogs. I love seeing what you think!

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