#i went to skin school to learn abt this shit and found no answers also ive been to multiple skin drs and nothin

[bittwitchy]

when it comes to my ships i need them to be bleeding bang the doldrums by fall out boy out of their pores or i'm not interested

[crimscnheadache-blog]

- ̗̀ NOW INTRODUCING: CHRISTIAN ❝ X ❞ BARNES !

hey guys !! i’m tay n i’m super excited abt this rp i can’t wait to get to know all of u & ur muses ! i work a full time job so i’m usually around in the evenings ( i’m in est ), unless i’m working from home which i do a lot bc i don’t like getting out of bed ( thnx depression ). anyway ! enough about me, here’s the basics on this monster ( ps sorry this got so long i was jus writin away ): 

[ tw: occasional mentions of drugs, emotional abuse/neglect ]

christian jonathan barnes ( they/them ) was born twenty-one years ago in montgomery alabama to deborah & jonathan barnes. the barnes are very religious people & were absolutely thrilled when their child was born marked.

christian was supposed to be their little miracle, proof that god exists & rewards the faithful, etc etc. almost all of christian’s childhood memories take place in a church, or have something to do with religion.

christian honestly tried their best to be the perfect son ( when they were still pretending to be a ‘son’ ) to their parents: being active in the church, earning incredible grades, playing soccer n running track, & volunteering in what little free time they had, but there was no way they could ever keep up with their parents’ expectations.

when they were fifteen, their parents sold everything they owned & moved to lunar grove, hoping that christian would find their soulmate. even though they never once asked their parents to do this, their parents always held it over their head in a ‘ we did all this for you, be grateful ’ way, & the emotional abuse got a lot worse once the family moved, because everyday they grew more & more disappointed that christian hadn’t found their soulmate, & blamed everything on them.

crumbling under the pressure their parents put on them, christian started taking adderall to keep up with school when they were sixteen. while the pills helped, they only managed to keep up with everything expected of them for another year or so. 

christian cut back on a lot of their responsibilities their junior year of high school, just to focus on keeping their grades up & not having a complete meltdown. this caused their parents to be even harder on them, which lead to a pretty stereotypical teenage rebellion.

christian started going by chris ( which was a bigger deal to their parents than you might think ), & started smoking weed, drinking, staying out late, sleeping around, & other crazy teenage shenanigans. they really went into a dark place, finally coming to terms with the fact that they could never be who their parents wanted & expected them to be. they also started to question the religious beliefs that they had always held, feeling as though they never really had a chance to form their own beliefs because church was always such a big part of their life, especially because of their marking.

when it came time for chris to go off to college, they were offered several scholarships at schools they had always dreamed of going to, but they were so burnt out on school & sick of doing what their parents wanted, so they turned them all down & decided to go to trade school instead. they never really saw this as a lesser path, they just knew it would piss their parents off because they saw it as throwing away their future. they kicked them out & disowned them, basically telling them that they could only return if they acted as they wanted them to. 

at this point, chris started going by just ‘ x ’, & did everything they could to get under their parents skin. they floated around living at friends houses for a while before saving up enough money to get a small place with a friend of theirs, working two jobs & learning how to be a mechanic.

now at 21, they live alone & are dying to get out of lunar grove, but can’t really afford it & has no clue where to go. their childhood left a bitter taste in their mouth when it comes to anything religious, & they’ve grown to hate the whole angels thing entirely because they partially blame the angels for the stress their parents put on them to be perfect. 

they don’t even want to find their soulmate & if you ask them why, they’ll give you some cynical answer about the angels not being that great & it’s not even important & finding their soulmate would only be doing what their parents wanted or some other bullshit, but the real reason is that they’re scared they won’t be enough for their angel, like they weren’t enough for their parents.

their label is ‘ the dirtbag ’ because they have become quite a cynical, rude, & vulgar person, & doesn’t really care much at all about anything or anyone. they tried so hard to be perfect as a kid, & now they actively try to not care about anything or anyone. deep deep deep deep down, x is caring & kind, but honestly they’re usually too unbearable to be around long enough to see that side of them. 

all they really like to do is drink, do drugs ( cocaine is their favorite, but they smoke weed the most ), & do stupid shit they really shouldn’t do ( u know.. bar fights, being an ass, reck-a-less behavior as zayn said ) 

they’re just a big ole mess really.. hate-the-world kinda grump. always has something negative to say. annoyin ass dark cloud everything sucks.. u get my drift

but honestly they work really hard & are a great mechanic & good with their hands in general & latches tf on to people when they actually let anyone in bc they don’t let a lot of people in & don’t like a lot of people, so in the rare event that they find someone they like, they firmly implant themselves up that person’s asshole

ok if u actually read all of that i love u & i’m sorry. like this if u wanna plot !