#i was so....idek yesterday that i cut of 5 inches of my hair
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tootsienoodlestan · 2 months ago
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#I'm gonna talk into the void for a second#it's been so weird. like. idk how else to describe it#i drove home from work in a daze bc my best friend called to tell me the news#i ate then i locked myself up in my room and cried#now it's been a few days and that's become routine#i was so....idek yesterday that i cut of 5 inches of my hair#i miss him#and it's complicated bci know what he did to others but i also know what others did to him#he was just a kid when he was thrown into fame and with all the pressure and lack of adult guidance or help he didn't stand a chance#he was gobbled up by something bigger than himself and wrung out for money when he was still a kid wanting to please everyone#idk everything just feels weird#the sadness is really ugly and strange#having to compartmentalize has been tough#i had to let some of my students know that i was a huge fan of 1d so they'd shut up bc they were going on and on about him#they're good kids and immediately stopped talking about it but they were speaking so callously about a person's death#i avoid tumblr unless im home because you all get it#i feel so incredibly alone in this in real life#my best friend has been amazing and listened to everything i have to say but she doesn't get it. how could she? her idols are still alive#so i only come on here when i can completely feel everything#I've spent a couple of hours everyday on here crying with all of you because you all get it#this ugly weird thing. you all feel it too#it's been the way it was when the fandom was at it's most active. all of us discussing and feeling and being *together*#I'm so grateful to you all for always being here or for coming back and for understanding it#idk if i would have had a genuine place to go to for this outside of tumblr#and i think thats a testament to all we've been through and the kind of online spaces the boys cultivated#especially liam who always seemed to be so happy to interact with fans and fanart#im going to stop now or im going to keep rambling forever#rest in peace liam and thanks for everything#lp#❤
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1996babes · 7 years ago
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92 Things ✨
I was tagged by @zigisbisexual thanks hun! THE LAST: 1. Drink: Lemonade 2. Phone call: My mom 3.. Text message: “I saw that😭” that was my reply to my cousin (a marvel fanatic like yours truly ☺️) who has sent me an instagram post of mark ruffalo talking about how we will never get a Hulk movie.
 4. Song you listened to: Fetish by Selena Gomez
 5. Time you cried: I think like two days ago when I watched the live premiere of Dunkirk and saw how happy Harry Styles was and his smile and happiness just literally made me cry. ❤️
HAVE YOU: 
 6. Dated someone twice: I have. Once. I’m glad it happened bc we definitely got more closure after the breakup the second time around. I believe that sometimes you have to go back to the the past to move onto the future.
 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: No, absolutely not. 
 8. Been cheated on: Yes
 9. Lost someone special: Yes. Um, my dad passed three years ago. In fact, his birthday was two days ago (July 14) I miss him all the time. 💔
 10. Been depressed: I went through a short period of depression when my dad passed away. But I am SO happy to say that I feel great now. 
 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: Of course! 😂
LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS: 
12. Amethyst (Pisces rule! 😝)
13. Teal Blue 
14. Jet Black
IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 
15. Made new friends: In real life and as well as on Tumblr. 16. Fallen out of love: Nope
 17. Laughed until you cried: Oh totally. Every day. 
 18. Found out someone was talking about you: Nope. 
 19. Met someone who changed you: Yes
20. Found out who your friends are: Yes, but I also did that awhile back, too.
 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: I have a fb but I only made one to use for games and to sign up for stuff faster. I don’t use it, so no.
GENERAL: 
22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: None.
23. Do you have any pets: Not at the moment.
24. Do you want to change your name: When I was younger, I used to hate my name because I thought it was a boy’s name 🤦🏽‍♀️but I figured now if I change that would be doing to much.😂
25. What did you do for your last Birthday: Went out to dinner. 
26. What time did you wake up: Today? At like 12:45 pm lmaoo
27. What were you doing at midnight last night: I was up all night reading Steve Rogers fan fiction. 😂😂😂
28. Name something you can’t wait for: I can’t wait to see Dunkirk so I can rep for my baby, Harry. I’m shook for Thor: Ragnork, Chris Hemsworth slays me. More books from Choices.
29. When was the last time you saw your mom: Yesterday, we went shopping.
30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: Too many things to even name. 
31. What are you listening right now: The Law and Order: SVU theme song. Can you say…ICONIC? 
32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Nope.
33. Something that is getting on your nerves: My life 😂but really, I can’t think of anything right now. 
34. Most visited Website: These past couple of weeks? Tumblr. Overall? Twitter.
35. Mole/s: Three small ones, actually. I have a small one on the side of my right thigh. The second one is a few inches under my knee or my right leg. The last one is on my ankle on my right foot. I always forget that they're there. 36. Fav song (at the moment): Definitely War of Hormone by BTS. Been listening to that bop on repeat. [this one was missing so I made this one]
37. Childhood dream: I want to be a singer. Still do. 
38. Hair color: Jet Black 
39. Long or short hair: Long
40. Do you have a crush on someone: Besides celebrities, no. 
41. What do you like about yourself: I like my smile, people are always complimenting me on it and that makes me happy. 
42. Piercings: Besides my ears, none…yet.
43. Blood type: I actually don’t know, but I going to get my blood drawn tomorrow so I will find out. 
44. Nickname: I have a lot but I dont feel like typing all of them.
45. Relationship status: Single 
46. Zodiac: Pisces 🌟
47. Pronouns: She/her 
48. Favorite TV Show/s: Supernatural, Grey’s Anatomy, Teen Wolf
49. Tattoos: I have quite a few so I’ll talke about two. “If you’re going through hell, keep going.” Across my right forearm and “To be loved; to be in love” on my right hip 50. Right or left hand: Right
51. Surgery: No
52. Hair dyed in different color: I dye the tips of my hair every once in awhile. Right now, they are a dark blue.
53. Sport: I play lacrosse but I love watching football.
54. Favorite Food: Macaroni and Cheese 😋( this was also missing)
55. Vacation: Last year, my friends and I went to Vegas to celebrate our friends 21st bday!
56. Pair of trainers: Um, I don’t have one.
MORE GENERAL: 
57. Eating: Nothing currently but I’m definitely thinking about macaroni and cheese right now.
58. Drinking: Nothing atm 
59. I’m about to: To do nothing 
60. Marvel or DC: Marvel, all day every day! 🔥but Wonder Woman was badass 👏🏼👏🏼[this one was missing as well]
61. Waiting for: Life to cut me some slack 8232;62. Want: to meet all the members of One Direction 
 63. Get married: In the future, yes 64. Career: I work on my college campus in the cafe. 8232;65. Hugs or kisses: kisses 💋 66. Lips or eyes: Eyes. 8232;67. Shorter or taller: I’m 5'8, so I love my height just the way it is 
68. Older or younger: I don’t date people younger than me. Not saying I won’t because I can’t tell the future but I just prefer them to be the same age or older. 69. -Missing-
70. Nice arms or nice stomach: This is the weirdest and most random question, Idek how to answer. 
71. Sensitive or loud: It depends, I can be both. As a Pisces, I’m very in touch with my emotions. BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN WE CRY ALL THE TIME BC WE LITERALLY DONT. Tbh, we are one of the most ruthless signs out there. 😂😂And as you can see above, I can get loud. 
72. Hook up or relationship: I love hook-ups. They can be really fun and totally chill and relaxed. Overall, relationships.
73. Troublemaker or hesitant: Definitely Troublemaker but I do think about the consequences before doing said “troublemaking things” I think before I do/talk.
HAVE YOU EVER: 
74. Kissed a stranger: Hell yeah, how do yal think a hook up starts? 😂😂😂im kidding but yes, I have. 75. Drank hard liquor: Plenty. I had another “hook up” joke but I thought, “nahhh, better not.“
76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: I don’t wear glasses.
77. Turned someone down: Yea
78. Sex in the first date: This is weird, but none of my first dates ever led to sex or a second date even lmao. Usually hooks ups were just once or twice and then gone.
79. Broken someone’s heart: Yup
80. Had your heart broken: Of course
81. Been arrested: Welllll….I was held for a period of time in a place where police officers work while in handcuffs.😂GUYS KIDDING AGAIN but no I have not and I don’t want to be.
82. Cried when someone died: Definitely
83. Fallen for a friend: I have.
DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 
84. Yourself: Eh 😂but on a good day yes
85. Miracles: Sometimes 
86. Love at first sight: Sometimes 
87. Santa Claus: I did when I was little bc those Santa Claus movie with Tim Allen movies were LIT AF 
88. Kiss on the first date: Always. I believe that if we don’t have enough chemistry/didn’t have a good enough time on the first date, we shouldn’t be going on another. 
89. Angels: Yes
OTHER: 
90. Current best friend’s name: Tayla (She’s literally the Cristina to my Meredith, the Stiles to my Scott, she’s my fucking person) 
91. Eye color: Brown
92. Favorite movie: I have wayyy to many, so I’ll name my three. Footloose (2011), Burlesque, Captain America; TWS
FINALLY Done! I’m going to tag a few people, @zigbadboy @gingerjane15 @lanapowellblog @ohmymaxwell @princeleolicious @asfhdj
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