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flurrys-creativity · 3 years ago

Note

Okay so I’m the anon that’s ask if your are comfortable doing a cheating fic and also the same one that ask for the sehun fic too 🙈 btw it was really good and I love it lost thank you.

Okay so the fic will be for sehun 🤫 we’re like he’s Been cheating on his girlfriend with y/n and it’s been going on for a couple of months now and one day sehuns girlfriend walks in on them having sex like reader is riding sehun on the couch and when his girlfriend walks she starts yelling and than she hits y/n so that’s when sehun gets mad and confess to his girlfriend about their affair. And also reader didn’t know he was in a relationship. with a happy end pls 🥺

I dearly hope I got the right interpretation of happy end now :D Anyway! I wrote it already!!!!(the power of me procrastinating on every other project AND work :D )

I hope you like it!

Cheat Code

Pairing: Oh Sehun (EXO) x Fem!Reader; Genre: Drama, Romance, Slice of life, Cheating AU, somewhat Established Relationship AU; Rating: nsfw, 18+; Warnings: unprotected sex, riding, kissing, slight breast play, getting caught, a furious woman, reader getting slapped, reader getting called a slut more than once and a whore, Sehun pushing said furious woman, feeling heartbroken and betrayed, showering, nudity; Wordcount: 2. 364

Summary: You were having the time of your life with Sehun when suddenly his girlfriend walked in on you two and chaos ensued.

You bit down on your lower lip, the drag of his dick inside your walls made you delirious. A moan escaped your lips when he thrusted into you, disrupting your slow and sensual pace. “If you wanted to fuck me, you shouldn’t have begged me to ride you”, you told him, brushing strands of hair out of his face.

“Couldn’t help myself”, he grinned and tightened his hold on your hips, thrusting harshly into you once more.

“Such a tease.” You leaned down and kissed him, grinning just like him. You didn’t care whether he took control or you had to take the lead. As long as you were together with him, you were content with anything.

You met Sehun at a coffee shop months ago and both of you were star struck the minute you two locked eyes with each other. At first you two only met for a regular coffee but soon enough the tension between you grew big enough that you had brought him home with you. Ever since you met each other as often as possible, sharing woes and worries, eating out together or simply enjoying the time you spent together.

So when Sehun texted you he had an especially rough day, you promised to come over as soon as you were done with work. The minute he opened his door, he pulled you against his toned body and kissed you deeply, sighing softly as his hands ran over your body. You had giggled but played along nonetheless.

That’s how you found yourself riding him on the couch in the middle of the living room. You had exchanged your shirt with his button up, leaving his upper body bare. Your hands glided over his pecs and toned muscles, your mouth salivating with the wonderful view he gave you.

His hand brushed over your skin as he moved it from your hip to your breast, cupping it with his large hand and pressing kisses on it through the fabric of his button up. “You look stunning in my clothes”, he whispered and nosed over the bare skin between your breasts.

You closed your eyes and threw your head back, letting yourself fall with his soft ministrations. A stark contrast to his harsh thrusts into you. Though you wouldn’t complain with all the attention and love he gave you. With Sehun you felt worshipped.

Sehun looked up at you, smiling softly when your eyes met. You made him feel alive, even on days where everything went wrong. You only had to hug him - no, even a smile was enough for him - to feel better and stronger than before, ready to fight again. His hands wandered to your back and shoulders, pulling your whole body down on his dick, locking you there while he thrusted harshly into you. Sehun’s eyes never left your face, seeing how it twisted in pleasure and how moans and whines fell from your lips with each thrust.

You stilled when you opened your eyes again, seeing someone standing in the doorway to the living room. You stared at the woman with wide eyes. Your mind was still clouded with lust and the confusion that spread through your body didn’t help you with reacting to her.

The woman stood there just as still, staring at you and Sehun. When he finally realised that something was wrong and turned his head towards her, she broke out of her stupor. Her nostrils flared in anger and an ear piercing scream filled the apartment.

She stormed over to you and before either of you were able to react, the woman slapped you right across the face.

Tears sprung into your eyes and the skin on your cheek stung from the impact. Your body automatically reacted with your hand touching your burning cheek in shock.

She was about to hit you again, when you pushed yourself away from Sehun and stumbled away from the woman, bringing a safe distance between the both of you. Your eyes shortly dropped towards Sehun, who looked equally stunned, before they shot back up to the woman.

You saw tears streaming down her cheeks, fury burning in her eyes while she screamed profanities at you.

Slowly you recovered from the first shock and pulled Sehun’s shirt close in front of your body, hiding your nudity. Your eyes flicked between that woman and Sehun until your brain finally decided to listen to the words the woman was spewing.

“HOW COULD YOU?!?? HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN CHEATING ON ME? WHO IS THAT SLUT? WHY AREN’T YOU ANSWERING ME? Sehun, baby!!! Please! Say something! Explain yourself!” Her screams turned down into whaling as she sat down next to Sehun and grabbed his upper arm, shaking it violently while she sobbed loudly.

“What do you mean by cheating?” You asked, confused with her antics. Your gaze shifted towards Sehun once again, who stared blankly into the distance the horror painted on his face.

The woman jumped up again upon hearing your voice, pointing a manicured nail at you. “I am his girlfriend! What are you doing with my boyfriend? How can you live with yourself knowing he has a doting girlfriend?”

You stared at her in disbelief, needing several moments before your gaze dropped to Sehun, waiting for him to say something - hoping for him to deny those words.

“HOW DARE YOU LOOK AT HIM?!” The woman screeched and lunged herself forward again, ready to attack you with her long nails.

You stepped back again, bringing the small couch table between you and her. Even if her accusations were right, you wouldn’t accept her slapping you again. Once was more than enough for you and definitely uncalled for since you had no idea.

“I didn’t know about you!” You shouted back at her, trying to reach that woman over her screaming.

“DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT ME? WE’RE WEARING MATCHING NECKLACES WITH OUR NAMES!” She grabbed the golden necklaces and showed it to you, pointing at Sehun’s name with her other hand. “How could you slut destroy our relationship?!”

You weren’t able to answer her when Sehun suddenly stood up and placed his hand on her shoulder, turning her towards him with an ice cold gaze. He had pulled his pants back up, leaving him only shirtless.

You felt like vomiting when you saw her hands wandering over his chest in a desperate plea. You tried to ignore her and focused on Sehun instead, wanting to hear what he had to say.

“It’s over between us.” His eyes held absolutely no emotion towards that woman and he slowly pushed her away from his body, not wanting her to touch him like that.

“Over?! OVER? How could you say that now? Please, let us talk when that slut isn’t clouding your mind!”

“Don’t call her that!” Sehun pushed her away, this time more harshly, ignoring her outcry while she stumbled backwards. “I fell out of love with you for a long time now. Even before I met Y/N. I’m sorry I dragged it out. I should have said something sooner.”

“Said something sooner?” You spoke up this time, looking at him in disbelief. “What do you mean by sooner? Before we started seeing each other, before we started dating or before we started having sex?” Instead of waiting for an answer you scoffed and walked around the room to pick your clothes up.

“Yeah, get lost, you whore!”

You ignored her statement, too caught up in your own thoughts. You felt like a robot with how stiff you moved around to get dressed again, only stopping in your movements when Sehun grabbed you by your shoulders. You looked up at him, feeling the tears rimming at the corner of your eyes.

“Stay”, he whispered softly, brushing a lonely tear away from your cheek. “Please.”

“Do you have any idea how used I feel right now?” Your voice cracked at the end of your question even though you didn’t speak above a whisper yourself.

Sehun shook his head. “I can only imagine. But I beg of you to stay. Please let me explain myself.”

Your mind told you to leave and take the longest and hottest shower as soon as possible, while your heart begged you to listen to him. It begged you to stay with him, begged you to ask him for a tight hug, wanting nothing more than to be held by his strong arms. You closed your eyes, contemplating your options before you sighed deeply. “I’ll take a shower”, you said in resignation and turned away from Sehun, walking towards his bathroom. Out of the corner of your eyes you saw the girlfriend fuming, ready to spew more profanities if it weren’t for Sehun’s cold voice grabbing her attention.

You couldn’t and didn’t want to listen to their conversation, undressing yourself and stepping into the shower, turning the handle to scorching hot and waiting for the water to burn your sins from your skin.

If you had known he had a girlfriend you wouldn’t have slept with him, wouldn’t have met with him. At least you tried telling yourself that, knowing full well you would have tried everything to be with him nonetheless. After all, you loved him with all your heart and soul. You watched the water run down your body and down the drain, caught up in your thoughts and self loathing. You wondered how you were able to be that blind, not noticing that he had a girlfriend already. You even tried to remember whether he wore a golden necklace the first time you two met but nothing sparked your memory.

“Y/N?”

You looked up to see Sehun’s shadow on the other side of the shower curtain. He nervously played with his fingers and stepped from one foot to another. “Are you alright?”

“I don’t know”, you answered him in a monotonous voice. You felt empty and confused, angry and maybe even heartbroken or desperate, though you didn’t want to get even lower with your pride.

“May I come in?”

You stared at Sehun’s shadow, momentarily confused with what he meant until you saw him strip out of his pants and step into the shower, hissing when the hot water hit his skin. You continued to stare at him, almost listlessly while he adjusted the heat of the water and finally turned towards you, looking at you with worried eyes.

“I’m sorry to have put you in such a situation. She’s gone now and she returned my keys as well and I broke up with her now and, and, and… I’m sorry.”

You hummed lowly, not feeling like actively engaging in that conversation. You didn’t even know why you stayed in the first place.

“It was already over with her when we started seeing each other. I was just caught up with my love for you and obviously extremely dumb because I didn’t break up with her completely. We were on a break when I met you because it wasn’t quite peachy between the both of us. I didn’t see her or anything, I honestly forgot that we were technically still together.”

“How could you forget something like that?” Your voice sounded off, as if it didn’t belong to you anymore. The tone was harsh and unforgiving, slashing Sehun’s attempts of apologising immediately.

“I don’t know. It’s dumb. I just didn’t think about it.” He ran his fingers through his wet hair, pushing it out of his face - an obvious indicator how distressed he felt. His eyes met yours, the pain vivid in them as he searched for any emotion in yours. “Please”, he begged, unsure what exactly he begged for.

“You lied to me”, you whispered, a sob breaking through your lips and tears mixing with the water of the shower. “How can I trust you again when you lied to me?”

“I’m sorry”, he said and pulled you against his chest, hugging you tightly while you sobbed into his arms. “I’m so so sorry.” He apologised over and over again, simply holding you and waiting until you calmed down. “I promise I won’t lie to you ever again! I love you, Y/N, I love you so so much. Please, please forgive me.”

You listened to his beating heart and the water dropping on your bodies. You raised your hands, placing one on your own chest and the other on his, comparing your heartbeats with each other. “I love you too”, you whispered almost inaudibly, new tears streaming down your face. Even though you felt hurt, you still loved him. You looked up at Sehun, blinking through the water to see his face.

He looked pained and worried, his arms wrapped tightly around you as if he feared you might push him away at any second.

“I need a new start”, you said loudly enough for him to hear, seeing how the hope in his eyes crashed and his shoulders dropped with despair. “I want to scratch everything and forget about this - especially what happened today.”

“I understand.”

“No, you don’t.” Your voice was stern and you knew your gaze was way too serious for your next words. “I love you and I want a new start. A start with no lies or secrets. I need a clean start. Let me fall in love with you again.” You took a deep breath, thinking over your options once more, hoping you were making the right call. “Tomorrow”, you caught Sehun’s eyes and made sure he followed each of your words, “I’ll be at the café ready to be bumped into by the love of my life and start going on dates with him.”

Sehun looked at you, needing a moment to process your words, before he broke into a teary grin, thanking you over and over again. He hid his face in the crook of your neck, shaking violently from his relieved cries.

You snaked your arms around his neck and hugged him just as tightly, softly stroking over his hair while humming a soothing melody. You loved him and despite his grave mistake you would continue to love him until you took your last breath.

Taglist: @xavi-in-kpopland

#supermnet #kwritersworldnet #kdiarynet #wkcnet #kvanity #oh sehun #exo #exo sehun #one shot #request #cheat code #call from the unknown #ask #flurry answers #thank you for the ask #ask me anything #kpop #idol

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miss-smutty · 4 years ago

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Brothers - Chapter 11

Unforgiven

Summary- You're hit with the bombshell of Chris coming home after a month away and after he left you questioning everything, completely heartbroken. How were you meant to confront him after so long?

Word count- 2K

Pairing- Chris Hems x reader

Warnings- Swearing, a smidgen of violence

18+ only!

Posted: 3rd August 2021

Taglist:- @everything-is-awesomesauce @nicolemt23 @innerpaperexpertcloud @pandaxnienke @chickensarentcheap @jjpogueprincess @longlostinanotherworld @mostly-marvel-musings @darklydeliciousdesires

Brothers Masterlist <<<

You haven't felt like this about anyone for a very long time and Chris has just made your fear of rejection all too real. You couldn't help the way you felt about him though, still feel about him. You love him and he'd told you he loved you, you'd felt it when he'd said it, you'd seen the look in his eye. So why were you even questioning it?

In the morning you finally felt the courage to check your phone - Liam had stayed with you all night until you'd calmed down enough to go to bed when the sun had rised and you were no longer taunted by your demons in the dark.

There's multiple text messages and missed calls filling up the screen of your phone.

I'm sorry I had to leave like that, are you ok? Xx

Read the first one. Your eyes scanned over the rest, mostly saying the same thing.

Y/N please answer. Let me explain myself. I didn't have time to speak to Liam about it all right then and I didn't want to leave on a bombshell.

His excuses made you feel sick to your stomach. You could understand why he did it but there were much better ways for him to go about it that wouldn't have left you feeling heartbroken.

You sighed heavily, putting your phone back onto your bedside table a little bit too forcibly and sinking back into your feather pillows. If you gave in to your impulses you would've text him back straight away but knowing deep down that would be the wrong thing to do, you restrained yourself. It took willpower but you just about managed, he'd made you feel like shit there was no way you were going to forgive him so easily.

*********

As the weeks passed by it became more and more difficult to ignore Chris, he wasn't giving up without a fight which admittedly made you feel a little bit better. You'd ignored him for so long it had become a habit and the fact he wasn't giving in told you he definitely did care about you but he'd made a major mistake and you were going to make him pay.

"Have you spoke to Chris yet?" Liam asked you over lunch.

"Nope." A sly smile played on your lips, you were kind of enjoying making Chris sweat but you'd never admit it.

"Maybe you should, he's been blowing my phone up trying to get in contact with you. You do know he's coming home this week?"

"What? You stopped with your fork in front of your lips, eyes wide. "No I did not know that, has it been a month already?"

"Uh-huh, and its gonna be massively fucking awkward for me if you two are still arguing."

"We're not arguing..." You brush your hair behind your ear, sitting up straight in your chair. " We're not even speaking."

The thought of Chris coming home fills you with dread and excitement all at the same time. You're so excited to see his face and yet dreading the thought of having to deal with your problems.

"When will he be home?" You ask, trying to be casual.

"I don't know, he just said this week. I haven't exactly been speaking to him myself, I'm still pissed off with him."

"And you didn't think to ask what day?.and why are you pissed off? He didn't do anything to you." Your voice was a little too high, it always was when you panicked. Chris could come home at any minute and you weren't mentally prepared for it.

"No, but don't you think him hurting you effects me? You've had a face like a slapped ass for a month for a start and if you want to know so badly why don't you call him?" Liam raised his eyebrows at you, unamused at the whole messenger thing he had going on.

"Pfft, I can't." You push your bowl of food away, suddenly not very hungry anymore. "It's been so long I wouldn't even know what to say."

"Your drama is honestly making me go grey." Liam runs his hand through his hair, looking at you with raised eyebrows.

"I think you'd look pretty good as a silver fox." You tease.

"I would but still, please sort it out." He gives you the glare. "Anyway, I'm going to have a little get together tonight. You up for it?"

"A get together or a party?"

"Well you know how it usually goes, it starts off as a get together but usually turns in to a party."

"Exactly, well I'm off out with the girls so we'll be there later."

You finished up your meals, Liam refusing for you to pay as usual, he was such a gentleman, you really wish his brother was a little bit more like him in that way.

*********

You help Liam greet his guests, smiling and mingling as you go. The ratio of women to men doesn't suprise you one bit, Liam was newly single after all but you roll your eyes anyway after leading yet another group of girls through to the living room.

You watched Liam greeting the girls with the most genuine smile on his face than you'd seen in a while, he was happy, finally and it brought you great pleasure.

Your heart stops beating when you hear Chris's distinctive Australian accent carry above the noise in the room, you can feel his eyes burning into your back as you turn around to find him. Your tummy fluttering when your eyes meet, unable to hide how much you've actually missed him from your face. He smiles sheepishly at you making your tummy somersault, excusing himself politely from the group of girls that had circled around him and making his way over to you, when Liam steps in his way, blocking his path.

"I don't want to make a scene here but you've got some serious explaining to do." Liam says sternly.

"I know... I... I wasn't honest with you before I left."

"That's putting it lightly. Y/N told me everything." You watched the exchange between the brothers, your nerves going into overdrive. You could hear Liam's friend talking to you but you weren't focusing on him, his words just a distant noise, your attention solely on the brothers. Brothers who looked like they were about to fight. Because of you.

"What are you, her bodyguard? If there's anyone I need to answer to it's Y/N, are you gunna let me past?" You watched as Chris' jaw tensed, the muscles in his neck becoming more prominent and you knew things were getting heated.

"If you're gunna treat her like shit Chris then yeah I am, the manly thing to do was come clean. It was a pussy move and you know it." People were starting to watch and your cheeks were burning but you were routed to the spot. Unable to move all you could do was stare blankly.

"Are you calling me a pussy?"

"Yeah, I'm calling you a fucking pussy." Liam shoved Chris square in his chest, he barely moved but his jaw clenched together, the tendons in his neck straining with rage.

Why, why, why were you stood watching this and not doing something about it? Your two favourite people in the whole world were about to fight each other and you're stood watching like it's a fucking soap opera.

You could see Chris thinking, debating about what he should do. Should he give his brother a free pass - he did deserve it, or should he fight back - he'd already called him a pussy he didn't want people actually believing it.

He decided to let it go, moving past him to get to you when Liam shoved him again, this time he wasn't expecting it and almost fell over, recovered himself and then went for Liam. Your mouth hung open, your legs started moving before you registered what was happening.

"Stop! Please stop!" You screamed, Liam's friends coming to the rescue and holding them both back. Tears in your eyes at the thought of them fighting each other

You looked up at Liam's friend holding Chris back. "It's ok, I've got him." You took Chris by the hand, leading him away from Liam, weaving through the crowd that had gathered, pissed off that they'd caused such a scene in public but you needed to get them away from each other so they could both calm down.

Chris walked into your room and you closed the door behind him, resting your head against it for a minute.

"What the fuck was that?" You question, turning around to face him.

"Don't ask me, what exactly did you say to Liam while I was gone?"

"Are you really trying to blame me? I told him the truth Chris, like you should've done." He hung his head in shame. His elbows resting on his knees and his head in his hands.

"Yeah I know but let me explain."

"I haven't got time for it now." You start shuffling through your wardrobe. "I need to get ready." You say with your back to him.

"Ready for what?"

"I'm going out with the girls." You turn around slowly, looking at him, taking him all in. You've missed him so much, why does he have to be so damn attractive.

Then he gives you that sexy smile and your knees almost cave but you remind yourself of the things he said, willing yourself to stay angry with him.

"Do you have to go? I've only just got back." You start going through your wardrobe, if you had your back to him you could distract yourself from the heavy sexual tension between you. The need to run up to him and wrap you legs around him, telling him all was forgiven while you kissed every inch of his damn fine body.

"Yeah I'm going. You don't get to treat me like that and then just come back and act like nothings happened."

"Y/N can you please stop being so stupid, this is ridiculous." He said sitting down on the end of your bed with his head in his hands.

"I'm being stupid? Are you for real?" You take off your clothes until you're left in just your underwear, turning around to look at him with your hands on your hips.

"Ok sorry that was the wrong thing to say, I've been trying to speak to you every day for a month. Did you not miss me?" He looks up, his eyes widening when he sees you in your underwear.

"You're always saying the wrong thing aren't you?" Now can you leave, I need to get ready and I want to do it in peace." You point to the door, your hand falling limply by your side when you watch Chris licking his lips, his eyes focusing everywhere but your face.

"Do you have to go? I think I can find a way of making you forgive me."

"You can't just fuck your way outta this one Chris, I'm not a toy for you to do as you please with."

"You're so hot when you're angry... I'm really trying not to fuck you senseless right now." He bites on his fist watching your anger falter.

"We're just friends aren't we?" You say rather bitterly

"We're not just friends and you fucking know it, friends don't do this shit -" he says as he moves in front of you, his hands wrapping around you and resting on your plump cheeks. "I told you I loved you and I fucking meant it. Can we please forget what I said? I didn't think about it until after I'd said it and I tried to call you straight away to apologize."

"Do what?" You reply trying to keep your calm as his hands electrify your body.

He cups your ass and lifts you into his arms, you instinctively wrap your legs around his hard torso. He lays you back onto the bed and kisses you deep, his tongue desperately finding yours as he thrusts his bulge into your tingling pussy. Your body betrays you as you let out a low moan, you feel him groan from deep inside as his prehistoric nature takes over.

"That." he says breathlessly.

"I'm still going out tonight but I'll be back later." You say between him kissing down your neck, savouring every last inch of your taste. "You can think about how you can make it up to me while I'm gone and before that you better go grovel to Liam, I think he's even more pissed off than me."

"Oh baby, you're not even going to know your own name by the time I'm finished with you never mind anything else."

"This doesn't mean you're forgiven, this means I'm giving you a chance."

#smut #chris hemsworth #chris hemsworth fanfic #chris hemsworth smut #chris hemsworth x reader #chris hemsworth x you #brothers #chris hems x you #liam hemsworth

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donutloverxo · 4 years ago

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Festive movies w/ August Walker

This is my first fic for Auggie! And second submission to happy hoelidays challenge cohosted with @navybrat817 @stargazingfangirl18 . I used the prompt 'I know a wy to warm you up'.

Warnings - 18+ only please, Smut(m/f), daddy kink, slight ddlg, cockwarming, soft!August.

Word count - 1k

7 days of ficmas

“But, daddy!” you whined, clinging to his huge bicep, putting on those princess eyes that always worked on him and an exaggerated pout.

“That’s not going to work, honey,” he seethed, trying to shaking you off of him. His heart swelled when you fell against the armrest of your couch, your eyes misty as you whimpered, calling him a ‘meanie’.

“I said I’m sorry,” you sniffled, knowing exactly what you were doing to him when you caught his face softening, and although your tears were real, so heartbroken about being rejected so cruelly, you wanted to milk his guilt and make him feel bad as much as you could. “And you’re still being mean!”

“Saying sorry doesn’t make everything okay, princess,” he shook his head.

August had told you to stay home, especially when he was gone, making you quit your job at the café where he had met you. You didn’t need it anymore anyway, he was going to take good care of you now. He needed to keep you safe, he had too many enemies, who would be happy to get their hands on something so precious to him.

He explained it all to you as nicely as he could, promising you as many stuffies as you could ever wish for when he gets back from his mission, and a nice Christmas spent together. Buying you a diamond ring, planning a proposal and a speech to go along with it to officially make you his.

Although he wasn’t much for the holidays he wanted to make it special for you as it was your first Christmas together.

But you decided it would be more fun to go out to your friends Christmas party, and then get drunk on eggnog, so naively thinking that you could trick him.

“You’re such a dumb baby,” he shook his head. “Since it’s Christmas, you get to decide your punishment.”

“Um...” you tried to think, something that seems like a punishment but actually isn’t, “You could maybe fuck me stupid with your big scary cock?” you blinked, your eyes wide and innocent as if you’d ask for something as wholesome like another scope of ice cream.

“No, that’s not a punishment. You would enjoy it far too much. I got you something from tiffanys,” although he didn’ttell you what exactly he had gotten you, he pointed to the gifts under the tree, “Maybe I should take that away? Return it?”

“NO!” you screeched, your heart hammering at such an outrageous prospect, you climbed on his lap, slobbering his face with kisses, apologising over and over again to try to make him less mad. “Please! I’ve never had any real diamonds, please,” you spoke against his moustache before kissing his lips.

“Alright, alright...” his resolve crumbled as he smiled, blowing a raspberry in the crook of your neck, “Since it’s Christmas, I can let it go for now, I’ll just have to punish you next year.”

“Okie, good! Now it’s time for the grinch,” you smiled proudly at your accomplishment, at being able to have fun with your friends and get away with it too as you put on the movie. Sure daddy would ‘punish' you, but you would just have to convince him to let you off with a few spankings.

“Ugh, I’ll forget about your punishment if you don’t subject me to this,” he threw his head back and groaned.

“Daddy, you promised. Are you going to break a promise to me and go back on your word?” He had promised to do all Christmasy things with you when he had left for his mission and you fully intended on holding him to his word.

“You’re too clever for your own good,” he said, pulling you onto his lap.

You almost wanted to tell him to pick whether he thinks you’re dumb or clever instead of going back and forth on it, but then thought better of it.

Half an hour or so into the movie August was too bored, he watched your cartoons with you sometimes to indulge you, but right now he wanted something more.

“Time to take this off, Y/N,” he said, unzipping your onesie.

“But I’ll get cold...” you looked back to him over your shoulder, not quite catching onto what he wanted to do with you just yet, his perfect innocent doll.

“Don’t worry, princess, I know a good way to warm you up,” his smirk almost predatory as he rid you of your pesky clothes, leaving you in just your socks as he took his hard cock out of his pants.

Nudging your intimate lips apart, he teased you with his leaking tip, kissing your temple to sooth the whines and whimpers you gave him.

“Daddy, it hurts...” you cried as he pushed into you, your legs spread wide on sides of his thighs, his fingers digging into the meat of your hips to keep you from running away.

Since your cunt hadn’t had any type of attention for over a month, it had grown unaccustomed to his long and thick length. It was always a struggle to fit him, but even more so now since you weren’t as prepared as you usually are, where it felt as if he was splitting you apart. You weren’t allowed to touch yourself when he was gone, or ever since you were his. That was one rule you were way too scared to break.

“Shh,” he hushed you, sitting back against the cushion once he was fully impaled inside your heat, “It’ll get better in a bit. Stay still for daddy will you? Don’t you want to be good for me?”

You whimpered, tears streaming down your face as you fought to seek more friction to your aching, swollen clit and sit still. Your pussy quivering around him and then clenching around his length, which earned you a slap to your behind.

“You better behave, princess. Be quiet and sit there like a good slut if you want your diamonds.”

You wiped your tears away, determined to be good for him, not really paying attention to the movie anymore.

“I’ll suck your cock after, daddy.” You said after some time, he hummed in response, drawing random patterns on your hips, “and maybe... you can fuck my ass? As my Christmas present to you?”

Which made him perk up and sit up straight, you hissed as his tip hit your spongy spot, “Are you serious, princess?”

It was something he had always wanted. But you were too scared to try, on account of just how fucking huge he was. And while you had gotten him a nice watch and cuffs, you wanted to make up for being a bad girl.

“Yes, daddy,” you murmured.

Laying your head against his shoulder and closing your eyes as you vaguely heard him say ‘Merry Christmas'.

Tags will be in the reblog! Click the link in the bio to be join the taglist or shoot me an ask/dm. Comments and reblogs are really appreciated! ❤❤

Dividers by @firefly-graphics

Please note that my work is not to be reposted or published anywhere other than my Tumblr or AO3 account without my permission. Reblogs are most welcome though!

#happyhoelidays2020 #august walker x reader #august walker #henry cavill x reader

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axwalker · 4 years ago

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Creep 2: I don’t care if it hurts

HIGH SCHOOL AU

Pairing: Drake Walker x MC (Lexie O’Brien) Book TRR

MASTERLIST HERE

Synopsis: Drake and Lexie are star-crossed lovers. Her father hates him and forces Lexie to stop any contact with Drake. Lost and heartbroken, he “bullies” her for two years until he discovers the truth of Lexie’s behavior.

A/N 1 This came up to me after I got an ask from @nestledonthaveone to write a fic based on the song CREEP.

I used to hear this song when I was a teenager, so when I read this ask, I immediately wanted to write something angsty but situated in high school.

A/N 2: Because they’re younger than usual, I decided to change my FC.

Words: 4,110

WARNINGS: Parental abuse, domestic violence, toxic love.

THIS IS NOT YOUR USUAL MARSHMALLOW DRAKE. He was abandoned as a boy, he’s tortured and he doesn’t know how to express his love. His behavior is not excusable.

This is a dark love story. If you’re not comfortable with it, PLEASE do not read it.

ALL MY FICS ARE 18+

TAGS ON THE COMMENTS

As this is darker than usual; I’m only tagging the people who commented in the previous chapter. If you want to get on or off the list for this fic, please do not hesitate to ask!!

DRAKE

Even if she never looks at me or speaks to me again, she’s mine. Even if I’ve been a horrible jerk to her for two years and she pales every time I pull into the parking lot on my motorcycle, she is mine. Just seeing her with him enrages me, so I walk straight toward my usual seat, directly behind Lexie, and slam my textbook down onto the desk.

Startled, Rys looks up at me, “Hey, Walker. What’s up?”

It’s not the first time he tries to make a move on Lexie. Last time –two years ago, we almost killed each other. Pretty boy might be an entitled ass, but he knows how to fight. Maybe he thinks Lexie is game again after all this time. He couldn’t be more wrong.

“Don’t you have a class this period?” I ask him. Liam cocks his left eyebrow, adjusting the straps of his backpack.

“I fail to see why that concerns you, Creep.”

My smile is murderous. “Get the fuck out of here before I break your face, pretty boy.”

I think he has a death wish because he looks at Lexie when he talks, “See you after class, Alexis, when your watchdog will be busy mowing my lawn.” Finally, he just shakes his head and gets out of the classroom. I resume my daily routine. Staring at the back of Lexie’s head, tracing the curve of her perfect neck, my cock getting hard over her perfect cherry scent.

“So that’s what you like,” I say, leaning forward to speak an inch from her ears. “You like them with blond hair and pink polo shirts. Prospects for Cambridge or shit. A huge trust fund. Don’t you? A brat like you needs someone who can spoil her. I bet you’d introduce him to daddy, wouldn’t you?”

She doesn’t respond. She never does. Her eyes stay stubbornly on the front of the class where the teacher has started writing today’s lesson on the board—my hands fist in desperation. I’m dying for her to talk to me. To look at me. Anything. “Too bad, Lexie. I’ll scare every single one of those fucking entitled boys off. You’re going to sit alone in your house on prom night, crying into your designer sheets like a baby. And I’m going to enjoy it.”

The only sign that she hears me at all is the quickening rise and fall of her shoulders. Even that tiny display that I’ve upset her is agonizing, floods me with self-loathing, but I can never stop. She ripped out my fucking heart, and I can’t deal with the consequences of that alone. I can’t let her go. I’ll never let her go. This toxic feeling is the only thing left between us. My hands shake with the urge to take her in my arms, to stop the trembling I caused. To protect her from everything. Even myself. I’d love to move my fingers up into the silky, brown hair that reaches the middle of her graceful neck. I don’t have a lot of money; most of the cash I earn as a handyman goes to food and fixing my dad’s cabin, but I’d give every last cent for her to turn and lock those soft brown eyes on me, just one last time. Sometimes when I jerk off, all it takes is fantasizing about Lexie looking at me, giving me one of those shy smiles, and I lose it. One stroke. Maybe two. Done. I can’t breathe without having her close. And I can’t breathe with her close. It’s a strange condition, this obsession, but she’s an addiction that I just can’t give up.

How could I? She’s intelligent, strong, and so damned gorgeous. Once upon a time, I thought she had a good heart too. But that was before she broke my pathetic heart only because I’m poor. I’ve been hurting since then, and I need her to hurt too. To know what it feels.

“Do you actually think that dumb rich boy would be a good choice for your first time, Lexie?” I grip my desk so tight it nearly breaks down, just thinking about her being kissed –touched by someone else. “At least that’s one thing us poor motherfuckers have going for us. We know how to fuck. If you went out with Rys for a while, you’d eventually give in and come slumming it one night, wouldn’t you? Knock on my rundown cabin door, begging me to fuck you as we both know you’d like.”

A pretty blush is starting to climb her neck. I have to take a deep breath to keep from kiss her pink cheeks. But I think if I got to touch her skin, my wall of bullshit would crumble. I’ve only fucked one girl. Since seeing Lexie for the first time freshman year, there’s been no one but her. I want no one else. She owns my cock as sure as she owns my heart. How easily she’s forgotten about both leaving me in agony.

“Stop,” she breathes. I freeze. Did she just speak to me? It’s the first time in two years that she’s even remotely acknowledged my existence.

“Lexie,” I managed to say. I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. That’s all it took. One pleading word out of her mouth, and I’m done.

“Just stop,” she says again, turning her head slightly. “Please.”

I fall back in my chair, my heart thundering on my chest. If we weren’t in the middle of class, if I didn’t feel like a monster, I would pull her into my arms right now. I’d hug her until she stopped struggling, then beg her to hit me, bruise me, make me pay for every shitty thing I’ve ever said to her. But before long, the class is over, and she’s leaving the classroom to get out of here. To put distance between us as quickly as possible—and I have no choice but to watch her because I feel physically ill. Still, I manage to get out into the student-packed hallway, my plan to apologize for being crude and a jerk and torturing her for so long.

My head is telling me not to apologize, though. It’s telling me she deserved it for being such a snob, for breaking me, for valuing money and status like everyone else. My damned heart is telling an entirely different story. It’s insisting there is an explanation for her behavior. Am I going to apologize or not? The decision is taken out of my hands when Lexie opens her locker, and the little gift I left before class falls down. It’s a picture I cut out from our last yearbook. In the photo is a gorgeous smiling Lexie above the caption Most Likely to Succeed. Except I’ve crossed out the caption and added my own. Most Likely to Be a Trophy Wife. Watching her read it, I almost get sick right there in the hallway. Usually, she’s perfectly composed, not betraying a trace of emotion where I’m concerned—a real Ice queen. I’ve always thought she honestly didn’t care. Today, though… she’s not pulling it off. Something is not okay with her, and I don’t like it. She has to bite down on her bottom lip to stop it from quivering as she puts the photo back into her locker, out of sight, her bright eyes finding me briefly, massacring me where I stand. Betraying with one single look how much she has been affected by my actions. Christ. She hasn’t been indifferent at all.

Before I can react, before I can call her name, she’s gone, vanished into the crowd of wild students excited to be leaving for the day. And I know what I have to do. I have to see her. To apologize. To get an explanation for everything. Tonight. I’ll return to her house for the first time in two years.

LEXIE

I’ve known this was coming all day. Sitting on the couch in my living room, trying to make myself as small as possible, I watch my father pace. He rants, gesticulating noisily. This isn’t new, my father’s rage threatening me. But it’s going to be worse than usual. Business has declined for him and it’s put his temper on a trigger. Dad’s new wife, Nancy, hates to be on a budget, and she’s been spending his money like crazy all over Paris --where she’s now. When dad gets home from the office, he’s rarely in anything but a horrible mood. A tornado eating up everything in its path. Completely terrifying. At least dad’s temper makes me forget what Drake told me today, the ugly words he said to me, the boiling anger in his eyes when he looks at me.

“Are you even listening?” The slap across the face comes as a shock because I’d momentarily disappeared into my thoughts, but the sting quickly brings me back to reality.

“Yes, sir,” I say, my ears ringing. “I’m listening.”

“This C on your algebra test is going to drag your whole average down.” He’s waving the test in my face. “What a disappointment you are, Alexis. Your teacher shared my disgust.” I nod solemnly, but I’m listening for the rain outside. “I guess you’re your daughter’s mother after all. A poor Mexican girl who could barely count.” It’s not true. My mom learned English and Greek by herself, and she was a great Spanish teacher in Portavira, but my father would rather die than acknowledge how smart she was.

“Don’t talk like that about her,” I retort.

My father snorts. “I beg your pardon?” He takes a step towards me, and I can see the threat in his eyes.

“I’m sorry.” I hate to be such a coward, but I know what he can do to me.” I’ll do extra credit. Something to bring my grade back up to an A.” I wet my lips. “Even if I can’t manage to raise the grade, it’s not going to show up on the college transcripts I sent off with my applications.” That’s the reason I let my focus slip a little in algebra. The finish line is in sight for everyone, and we’re just waiting to find out where we’ll be accepted for college. It’s a wonder I’ve been able to maintain my focus this long in any class, considering Walker sits behind me in every period, brooding making me feel … something. At the reminder of him, I want to close my eyes and dream about him. I replay that night in my garden when he kissed me two years ago, so tenderly and passionately, when he spoke to me so sweetly and honestly before he became the second villain in my story. Someone I dread, as much as I crave the sight of him.

At least that’s one thing us poor motherfuckers have going for us. We know how to fuck. If you went out with that punk for a while, you’d eventually give in and come slumming it one night, wouldn’t you? Knock on my trailer door, begging me to ride you right.

Should I be ashamed of the way my body reacted to those words? I grew uncomfortably damp in the hard plastic chair, the center of my body clenching, seeming to beat like a heart. His breath on my neck made me shiver, head to toe. Even the way he scared off Liam Rys did something to me. Aroused me. Deeply. It got so bad that I broke the rules and asked him to stop. I can still hear him saying my name in that tortured way after. That shocked, uneven sound. Lexie. And whether I’m ashamed of myself for it or not, I know I’ll think of it when I touch myself tonight. His voice, his hands, his eyes obsess me.

“College?” My father snorts, tearing the test in half. “You’re not going to college.”

This grabs my attention. A horrible feeling is making me cold. “I’m…what? What do you mean? I applied to nine different schools. I have a four-point five GPA.”

For the first time, I notice his red face is about more than just rage. There’s…humiliation. I’ve never seen him display that emotion.

“None of the American colleges that accepted you offered scholarships.”

“I’ve been accepted?” I gasp, sitting forward, heart pounding in my chest. “Where? I didn’t see the letters—”

“All the mail in this house goes through me, Alexis. I read them. And you failed to get academic scholarships. You failed. Not that I’m surprised.”

I don’t point out that his refusal to let me participate in any extracurricular activities is more than likely to blame for that. I’m too worried about what he’s saying, what this means. The blood is draining from my head, making the room spin around me.

“Okay, I’m sorry about that. I’m sorry. But…we have money. We can pay tuition, can’t we? Or colleges in Cordonia are almost for free. I can go to any of them; I don’t have to go to NYU.” I have to get out of here. I have to get out of here. This is my way out. College is the escape route. I counted on going back to New York, but I can stay here and go to college in Cordonia City.

“Listen to you, so quick to spend my hard-earned money—spoiled brat. And of course, you can’t go to college in Cordonia. What for? To end up being a schoolteacher like your mom? A housewife as Nancy?” He laughs bitterly. “No, you’ll stay here, and I’ll help you find someone suitable to marry.”

I shake my head. “There’s financial aid, then. Loans or I can get a job and go to college in Portavira…”

“You want to leave, just like her, don’t you? You’re all the same.”

I don’t even flinch when he yanks me to my feet, shoving me into the wall. In fact, for the first time, I took him right into his eyes. And I can see the violence burning on them has nothing to do with me. It never had anything to do with how I behave, my choices, how hard I worked in school. How welcome I made Nancy feel or cooked a roast. It’s about him and his self-loathing. It’s his sickness. Not mine. I can also see that he was never going to send me to college. Because he wouldn’t be able to control me from a distance or stop me from sharing what I’ve been subjected to since my mother died. Not like he does now. He wasn’t physically abusive all the time. Especially not when his new wife is around. But she traveled often, and then he’d push me. Shove me. Slapped me several times. I’ll graduate at the top of my class for nothing. He knew I would all along.

That’s when I realize I’m free. I don’t have money, but college is free in Cordonia. I can work, save a little and go to college in one or two years. I’ll be a writer; it’ll just take more time than I thought. “Go to hell,” I whisper.

He steps back, giving me the momentary satisfaction of his shock. “What did you say?”

Liberated, I scream it this time. “Go to hell!” From the moment I sat down to have this conversation, I knew tonight would be worse than usual, but I’ve just bought myself a ticket to hell. Usually, I can retreat to the untouchable place inside of me as he unleashes his rage, but not tonight. He doesn’t stop at one or two slaps. He punches and kicks, and I’m present for every punch and kick. Every yelled insult. Finally, I start to get scared. I’m crawling across the carpet on my hands and knees, searching for a weapon I can use in my defense when I glance out the window and see Drake staring back at me, his face a mask of horror.

Drake

What I’m seeing just isn’t possible. It can’t be real. My head won’t accept it. Not until her terror-filled eyes meet mine through the window and the truth pounds on my chest, leaves no doubt that this is real life. Lexie’s father is beating her. Her mouth is bloody, one of her eyes beginning to swell, arms and legs visibly weakened. I can barely fucking process it before my body is springing into action, desperate to protect her. To put a stop to the worst thing I have ever seen. What the fuck. Scorching hot rage takes over. I kick in the front door and throw myself between Lexie and her father. His fist is raised, but it pauses when he sees me, his momentary confusion giving me the time I need to knock him out cold. It only takes one right uppercut from someone his own size, and he goes down, his blank, glassy eyes staring at nothing, mouth opened. It’s not satisfying enough.

Nothing will ever be satisfying enough. I want to kill him, destroy him, but my Lexie is struggling for breath behind me, and she’s all I can think about. Turning, I approach her, my heart threatening to jump off my chest. As gently as I can, I catalog all of the cuts and purpling skin. No. No. Who could do this to her? Who could lay a finger on her in anything but reverence? Get her out of here. Calling her name, I reach down to pick her up, but she flinches and hurries back, bringing her body up against the wall.

“Don’t touch me!” Those words filled with fear rip the soul clean out of my body. My hands drop limply to my sides and two years come rushing back, hitting me in the chest like a hammer. Every word, every action. Everything I did to make her life harder when this is what she’s been dealing with at home? Fuck me.

“Lexie…” My voice is as kind as I can. I feel broken. “I’m sorry. I came here to apologize. For everything.”

She puffs a humorless laugh, testing her cut lip with the tip of her tongue. “Bet you weren’t expecting to see this.”

“If I knew this was happening, I would have been here a long time ago. I would have stopped it. I swear Lex.”

Her expression can only be described as stunned. Maybe even a little pissed. “You are not my savior, Drake. You are my enemy. You’ve been for two years, and I want nothing else from you now.”

“I am not your enemy.” Those words barely make it out of me, my chest hurts so fucking bad. “Don’t say that.”

Unsteadily, she uses the wall to try and stand. I try to help her, but she recoils, and it’s a dagger straight into the center of my throat. Nothing less than I deserve, though, isn’t it? Her distrust of me is entirely my fault. I’ve made her hate me. There has to be some way to fix what I’ve done. Please God, let there be away. But right now, my main concern is her physical safety. Knowing she’s been in danger all along is unbearable. I only decided to come here tonight a few hours ago. What if I didn’t? What if I arrived an hour later? The possibilities are going to haunt me for the rest of my life. From the floor, her father groans, shifting slightly.

“We need to get you out of here,” I say, anxious to get her free of this place. “Now, Lexie. I need to get you somewhere safe.”

She’s standing now. Leaning against the wall and cradling one arm to her stomach, regarding me warily. “How do I know I’m safe with you?” It’s so much worse that her question is honest. Not meant to hurt me. She honestly doesn’t know if I pose a threat. It guts me where I stand.

“You are the safest with me,” I say thickly, cursing myself. Wanting to erase the last two years so badly, my hands shake. “Please believe me. I’d die before hurting you. I’d never, Lexie. I’d never do something like that.”

Her father rolls over onto his back and slurs a few words before losing consciousness again. Still, the sound of the older man’s voice seems to scare Lexie, “I…maybe you can just give me a ride to…a motel maybe?” She pushes off the wall, her step uneven as she walks toward the stairs. “I need some things from my room.”

It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell her we don’t have time, but I’m just grateful she’s trusting me enough to leave with me, so I don’t argue. I just wait until she’s halfway up the stairs, then tie her father’s hands behind his back with my belt in case he wakes up before we leave. I have no problem knocking him out a second time, but Lexie has seen enough violence for one night. Cautiously, I walk up the stairs toward the light coming from a room halfway down the hall. This place is a far cry from my home. It’s elegant and clean, and tasteful, but it lacks any warmth whatsoever. It’s cold, like a museum. Turning the corner into Lexie’s room, it’s time to hate myself all over again. There is nothing on the walls, none of the expensive furnishings. Just four white walls, a bed, and a dresser that doubles as a desk. Several textbooks. She looks back at me over her shoulder as if judging my reaction, and I keep my features impassive, though I’m dying on the inside.

“What can I do?” I ask.

“How long do we have?”

“As long as you need.” It’s physically painful not to pull her into my arms when I’m standing this close, and she’s hurt. Sad. Yet full of more inner strength than I’ve ever witnessed in another human being. I’m lucky just to be in her presence. I fucked up royally. And if she allows me back in, I’ll never do it again. It’s probably, definitely, too much to hope for. Being allowed back in. She doesn’t even look sure about having me in her room. Let alone her heart. I was trying to protect my own heart, but I lost it instead.

“Um…” She closes her eyes to focus, a familiar trait I’ve seen in class countless times. “There is a black bag in the hallway closet. Can you just stuff anything into it from the bathroom that looks useful?”

Ask me to bring you a unicorn. I’ll find a way to do it. “Sure.” We work in silence, Lexie taking things out of drawers and adding them to the bag, which I’ve left open on the floor. I add toiletries from the bathroom, and once it’s zipped, I wait, watching her hesitate in the doorway.

“Lexie?” Conflicted chocolate eyes meet mine.

“I can’t just leave, can I?”

“You’re not safe here, baby,” I say softly, trying to keep the residual rage at bay because it’s the last thing she needs. Not to mention she’s had her fill with negativity from me. No more. “How long…how long?”

She shrugs, the saddest expression in her eyes. “My mom died five years ago. Ever since then, it’s gotten worse and worse. Although I never had a chance to talk to anyone about what happened behind closed doors, you know? I don’t think a person can evolve into a monster. It’s inside him.”

“I don’t know,” I say. “I became one, didn’t I?”

That gives her pause, forms a line between her delicate brows. “Yeah. I guess you’re right.”

She starts to walk past me, stops, standing close enough to fill my nose with cherry. “He told me if I ever spoke to you ever again, he would hurt me. Ruin you, have you evicted. Make sure you never got hired again. I didn’t mean to…hurt you. Or hurt your feelings, if that’s what happened.”

That revelation destroys me, sets me on fire. “Jesus, Lexie. You were protecting me? And I…I tortured you for it?” I twist the neck of my T-shirt, trying to calm down, but it doesn’t work. I’ll never be calm again “I’m so fucking sorry.”

She glances at the doorway, then back at me, eyes closed again in that way that says she’s thinking. “All I want from you now is a ride out of here, okay? And on Monday morning, you’ll stop.” She opens her shining eyes again. “No more bullying, Drake. If you’re really sorry, you’ll do that for me.”

Fuck. I couldn’t say one more single shitty thing to her if my life depended on it. Put me at gunpoint, and I’d rather get shot at than torture this girl for one more second. But I’m highly, painfully aware that with an end to the bullying comes an end to the possessiveness. No more scaring off guys who show interest in her. No more getting close enough in class to count the hairs on her head, to smell her sweet fragrance. And to tell the truth, I’m pretty fucking worried I don’t know how to give those things up completely. I don’t think I can physically do it. This addiction with Lexie isn’t something I can cut off. A leg would be easier to sever. But my hesitation is causing her eyes to worry. If I don’t agree to, essentially, let her go… she’s not going anywhere with me. And that means her safety won’t be guaranteed. I need it to be. More than anything.

“No more bullying,” I say, finally. A moment later, I follow her out of the room and down the stairs, trying desperately to count the hairs on her head before I no longer have the chance.

#tw domestic violence #toxic relationship #tw bullying

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physicalturian · 4 years ago

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[G] A promise of hope - Gojo Satoru X GN!Reader

Request from @waywarduniversityshepherdturtle “Hi can i request for a jealous Gojo Satoru where out white haired guys is *kinda* intimidated with his s/o's good looking ex? Can start with an angst and end with a fluff ❤“

[No pronouns used for the reader, no physical description; Everyone +18] [No spoilers from the anime or the manga]

Words: 2817 Warning: Angst, fluff, mention of death (thought he died)

It all happened because of one small thing, one joke. But it was the joke too many. I was trying to have a proper, serious discussion and he had to take it light-heartedly. He had to fool around, I loved him deeply but now was not the time. I was worried for him. Yes, he was strong, one of the strongest if not the strongest, but I could not help but get antsy, waiting for him to come back to the apartment we shared. We had promised each other to always come back, it was a stupid agreement to come to considering our line of work, but it helped us, or at least it helped me get some sort of reassurance.

Except he did not come home last night, I was left waiting alone in the apartment, anguish eating me up as I sat in the couch. From there I had a good view of the door, and I could see him if he entered, bloody, beaten or just tired. Most of the time, it was just tired, and I was glad for that, and on rare occasion there were a few scratches covering his clothes and skin. We would treat them, then go to bed.

But tonight, was not like that, I waited and waited. The clock ticking nearby reminding me of the silence that was wrapped around me, the lack of presence in my home. The lack of partner being loud and obnoxious. I just waited. Time was running by, but not quickly enough, it was painfully slow and my heartbeat was going as fast as the awful thoughts in my mind. Maybe the curse was too strong? Maybe he was working with someone and they turned on him? Maybe he was… maybe he was dead.

Those thoughts plagued my mind and never left as stress coursed through my body. I was tempted to call him, but I knew it would be too risky to call during a mission. My hands clasped on my knees did not stay there long, I kept moving, shifting on the spot, hands dry and cold. My stomach churning. I could not get any ounce of sleep that night, I simply waited, and waited some more. He never came home.

At some point during that restless night, I fell asleep. When I heard a sudden noise in the house, I was startled awake and was ready to use my power when I saw the grinning face of my partner who stood by the fridge. The door of the latter was open as he looked at me over his shoulder. Slowly, I let my arms fall to my side and felt all the tension leave my body before shuffling towards him. I did not know what to say, maybe I was overexaggerating, maybe… but I dreaded his death, and here he was, fresh as a daisy. “Heya, I didn’t want to wake you up, you seemed sound-“ “No. Don’t.” I interrupted him as I gripped his hand and made him let go of the fridge door.

I then closed it and stood by him; I do not know what I was feeling. Enraged? Relieved? Seething… Exhausted, sad… “What? Are you okay-“ “I’m not! I’m not okay, I thought- I thought you had fucking died Satoru!” He chuckled in response. He waved a hand in front of me, dismissively, while smiling. “I can’t die that easily, come on, who do you think I am? Ye of little faith-“ “You did not come home…” I breathed out. I was surprised by how weak my voice sounded as I looked at the floor, I wanted to sleep. But I was very awake, so many emotions were mixing up inside me. “Itadori let me stay at his place, I was too tired.” He explained, adding that I was overreacting.

“Am I? Am I really? … Maybe I am… but, you know you- we-“ I gulped and shook my head. “That promise of coming home, I’m holding onto that every night, because you promised you’ll come home…” He laughed, he placed a hand on my head and laughed. “Come on, it’s just a silly little thing-“ “It’s not though, I care about that a lot, so when you did not come back, I panicked.” I explained a bit heartbroken. I thought we both needed that promise, I thought it helped us both but maybe it was only to indulge me.

Cradling my face in his hands, he looked at me without ever taking off his glasses, “You got a little worried for me? How cute, look at you all-“ I slapped his hands and turned away, feeling some sort of humiliation from how he was treating me. “Satoru? Fuck you, I’m asking you to be serious for two fucking minutes and you’re being an asshole. I thought you were dead; can you get that through your thick skull? Can you at least try to understand what I’m feeling or is it too much to ask?” I had no control over the anger, the frustration, seeping through my words. I was tired.

Taking a deep breath, I exhaled in a calming manner, hoping it’d help. Once I calmed at least a little bit, I placed a hand on his cheek. “Forget it, you’re home, right? That’s what matters, right? So how about you get some rest, and I’ll go see a friend.” I tried to force a gentle smile on my face, but deep down I felt a need to let it all out. He reached out for me, but I shook my head, taking his hand a few seconds before letting go. He said he could get changed and he could come along, but I refused, telling him I just wanted to spend some time with my friend.

After getting dressed, I left the apartment in a rush and called my old friend that also happened to be my ex-boyfriend. He picked up quite fast and greeted me energetically, I tried to match his eagerness but he noticed how off it sounded and asked me what was going on. “I… I need some advice, someone to talk to- It’s okay if you’re busy though- you know what, forget it-“ “No, no, I’m just jogging in the park, let’s meet up there? How long will you take?” He asked softly, I heard the microphone rub against his shirt as he ran and it was slightly unpleasant but I couldn’t say anything, at least he picked up.

“Give me ten minutes, and I’ll be there. The usual spot?” I asked, he agreed and said we’d see each other soon, before hanging up. I arrived right on time at our usual spot, being a picnic table under a big tree by the pond in the park in which we met a few years back. I don’t regret our relationship, but we only dated because we thought that’s what was going on between us, love, except we were better off as friends.

Once I arrived, I could see him sitting on the table, not the bench around it, as he chugged his large bottle of water. He was very sweaty and no amount of slight breeze could freshen up his looks, and yet he was still pretty handsome like that. I suppose I had taste. Even though I did not feel anything for him anymore, I could observe a painting and see he had charms, that did not change. “Hi gorgeous beast.” He said as he tried to pull me into a hug, but I pulled back telling him he stank. He chuckled and patted the spot next to him, “It’s the smell of hard work, you wouldn’t know.” I would usually laugh, but right now I was not in the best mood, and he noticed.

He did not waste time and asked me right away what was going on, I was taken aback but told him, vaguely what was going on. I did not say my boyfriend was a sorcerer, nor did I tell him about curses but I mentioned we were in a dangerous line of work both of us and everything else he needed to know. “… And he always jokes around, most of the time I love it but today, I was just… I genuinely thought he had died, and he did not realize that and kept treating it light-heartedly.” I sighed.

My friend hummed pensively before speaking, “I think he’s masking his own worry with jokes, and tried to make you feel better by doing it to you too? Like, you know, like, maybe if he made it seem like he was perfectly fine, you’ll feel better? I don’t know the man, but I don’t think he meant wrong- he’s just lacking some social cues clearly.” He explained with a light tone as he drank some more. “You’re right… I just, I just wished he had sent me a text, or at least hugged me when he got home, perhaps apologize… but that one is stupid because he did not do anything wrong, I don’t know what I want…”

Huffing a laugh, he wrapped an arm around my shoulders and brought me in a side hug. “Tell him that, I’ll give you a hug, if you want you can cry too, I’m already very moist anyway so, tears aren’t going to change much.” I hit his chest playfully when he said that and draped one arm over his back as I thought. “Yeah… you’re right… I miss him, I really want hold him right now, to feel him, know he’s alright, you know?-“ “Alright there, that’s a bit too much here, touch him if you will but please don’t tell me about it.” He said jokingly as he let go of me before standing up. “But now, for real, tell him that. I’m sure he’ll understand, he plays stupid but he ain’t dumb.” “Right, right… yeah. Thank you so much for indulging in my little twists and sob stories.”

“Hey, anytime. I’m always there for you, alright? Come on, take care, see you around!” He said as we bumped our fists, before jogging off.

After that, I went back home. When I walked up the stairs, I could hear heavy footsteps inside the apartment and slowly opened the door, careful not the make noise. What greeted me was no burglar, but it actually was my boyfriend who seemed to be pacing in the living room. I knew I could not catch him off guard, so when I dropped my keys in the bowl by the entrance, he turned towards me and rushed to my side. “Are you going to leave me? He’s hot, sure- but I can do better, I swear I didn’t mean-“ “Wait wait wait, what are you on about?” I cut him off in his ramble in a confused expression.

“The man you were with-“ “You followed me? Satoru… Privacy, just privacy, I’m asking for a tiny bit of that…” He shook his head and gripped my biceps hard, “You were with another guy! Is it because of something I did? Do you want me to be more muscular? He’s hot, yeah, but is he as strong as me-“ I cut him off once more but gripping his jaw, not too tightly, but enough to purse his lips. “You’re jumping to conclusions. Do you think so low of me? To cheat on you?” “No- no cheating, like not yet but I would understand because he’s kind of looking like a Greek god-“ I sighed and let go of him, asking him to stop talking for one second.

And surprisingly, he did. I took that opportunity to measure my words, before speaking carefully. “Don’t stalk me, and don’t assume shit about me, that’s the first thing.” I waited for him to nod, then continued, “He’s my ex-“ “You’re going back with your ex?! For one joke- come on, that’s-“ “I’m not cheating on you, what the fuck? Why do you think so low of me? What do I look like to you? Wait, you know what?” I hit his chest, not too hard but enough to let some anger out, then once more, and again, and again until I couldn’t feel the need to do it anymore. “That one fucking joke, I hated it! You’re strong asshole, sure, sure, ok. But anything could happen out there! And you did not come back, okay?” I let out a shaky breath, making Satoru a bit confused as he took off his glasses and looked at me, lost.

“You might not care about that promise, but it helps me a lot… and until last night, you kept it… and in my head, the only image I could think of, was your motionless body, somewhere….” I let go of his shirt and moved away from him to sit on the floor, my back sliding against the wall. “And you laughed it off… It felt humiliating, and then, you think I’m cheating on you? No, I asked my ex, my best friend, what I should do, because I was hurt… and he just gave me good advice… As a friend.” I reiterated that part, to make sure my boyfriend understood who the man I hung out with, was.

For once, the famous Gojo Satoru was speechless and he slowly knelt down by my side. His expression had no cockiness, no pride, no joy, just pain, understanding and sorry. “I did that… I didn’t mean to, I just feel like, I have to… I wanted to make you smile, I didn’t know how, so I thought you’d laugh a bit then kiss me, I didn’t realize you were that worried… I fucked up…” He was not a man known for his great words, he also had a hard time apologizing but I could feel he was feeling bad about it, but so was I and while he was sorry, my chest still ached. “I’m sorry babe… I really hold onto that promise too, I just… I don’t know why I said that, I want to come home to you as much as I want you to come home to me safely.” He whispered as he took hold of my hand.

Sighing I looked at our intertwined hands and tightened my grasp on his hand, his slender fingers brushing the back of my hand. “You’re strong, I know that but I can’t help it Sato… And I really want to know you’re safe-“ “How can I make you understand that I’m fine? I’m peachy, I swear, want to see my hot body-“ When he started to lift his shirt, I interrupted him, “Hug me. Just hug me, please.” My words struck confusion in him. He stared at me as he let go of the hem of his shirt, then slowly let go of my hand before bringing me close to his chest and laying down on the floor with me, not letting me go.

It was a tight hug, not bone-crushing but perfectly tight. Warm, reassuring, loving…. I heard him whisper gentle words to my ears and brush his hands over my back as I enjoyed the moment. The ache in my chest was slowly dissipating, letting the heartwarming feeling of comfort take most of the space in it. But there was still one thing left to discuss.

Clearing my throat, I heard my boyfriend hum curiously. “Did you really think I’d cheat on you just because he was hot?” I asked, dumbfounded. The white-haired man chuckled nervously and looked to the side, “I mean, to be fair, he’s like super hot, so you’d be in the right-“ I hit his chest, “Never! I would never cheat on you, plus you’re so much hotter, if that’s what you were worried about.” It was one of the rare times I could see a blush on his cheeks as he looked down at me, the angle making his chin look funny. But the blush quickly disappeared, “I know I am, I’m Gojo Satoru- I could probably beat him at his jog, I have a lot of stamina- and you know about that, I know how much you like what I do with my hand when you-“ “Hey, hey, it’s a cute moment, don’t ruin it. Yes, you’re cute, you’d beat him of course, hugs now.”

He laughed and held me tight as his head hit the ground with a thud. “Don’t ever scare me like that again, I love you too much to go through that again…” I mumbled shyly against his chest. He placed a hand on the back of my head in response and kissed it gently, “I’ll try, I promise.”

Those promises were not worth much in our line of work, but they kept me hoping and hope is what makes us live, hopefully it’ll be a long life.

#gojo satoru #jjk #jjk x reader #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x reader #gojo x gn reader #gojo satoru x gn reader #jjk gojo #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #gojo

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tinyboxxtink · 3 years ago

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"Dancing With The Devil" (Abel Plenkov/The Ripper x You OS)

This one goes out to @prurientpuddlejumper for the idea. I think I'll make these like a series of OS, maybe like-- strung together? Or just taking place in the same universe? I really just don't want have to keep explaining the deal between Abel and Ripp.

Does that make sense?

Still gonna keep tagging you, let me know if I need to stop.

Tag List

@madamsnape921

@lolliepopsicle

@chasingeverybreakingwave

@milkshqke

@wanniiieeee

@word-scribbless

@gibbs274

@sassyada

@aprildecker-blog

@bookishfanfic

@stars-in-the-skies-world

@stars-trash-18

@omgsuperstarg

@objection-argumentative

@thatesqcrush

@shittanyy

@mrsrafaelbarba

-------

You were getting ready for a date with your boyfriend Abel Plenkov, he promised he was surprising you with a new place he was sure you'd love. You were excited because as much as you loved Abel, he tended to be a bit mundane, predictable. It was safe and comforting of course, but routines got old after a while. You were ready for a wild night out. Although with Abel, you didn't know how wild that could be.

However when there was a knock at your door, you swung it open to a pair of devilish emerald green eyes. Abel's body was dressed in a leather jacket and muscle shirt with tight jeans, showing off his perfect apple bottom ass. But this definitely was NOT Abel.

"Hey there sexy," a low, guttural voice greeted you.

"....Ripp?" You blinked a few times in disbelief, trying to hide your excitement. You hated that you had started to be attracted to Abel's demonic side, but he was so….enticing.

"I promised you a surprise, didn't I?" He pulled a single black rose from behind his back and handed it to you.

"....T-That was you?" Your heart was pounding as you took the rose from him.

"Well of course it was baby, you think Honest Abe would know how to be spontaneous even if his pathetic life depended on it?" Ripp raised an eyebrow.

"Don't say that!" You hit him softly. "Abel's a dear sweet man"

"....You know he's asleep right now, right baby?" He smirked. "No need to lie,"

"...He is?" You gasped slightly.

"Yes, it's just me and you tonight," He grinned evilly, pushing himself inside your apartment and grabbing you into a hungry, aggressive kiss.

Usually you'd slap him away or yell obscenities at him, but for some reason knowing you were hidden away from Abel's doe eyes awakened something in you that you kept locked away, sealed up tight.

A need for Ripper.

You kissed him back even more aggressively, ripping off his leather jacket from his body and tossed it across your living room as he picked you up and you wrapped your arms around his body. It was Abel's body, but with Ripper in the driver's seat, it felt entirely different. Dare you think...better?

His long digits caressed your body, exploring your skin in ways Abel never did. It was like being with a whole new man. His mouth moved from your lips and trailed down your neck, sucking hard as he went. He pulled your shirt off and continued his trail of hickeys down your side, massaging your breasts at the same time.

"I knew it," you heard him chuckle darkly while making his way down your ribcage.

"...Excuse me?" Suddenly your head snapped up, your pleasure paused.

"I knew if you thought your little choir boy wasn't looking you'd dance with the devil,"

"... W-What do you mean, 'thought'?" You whispered in horror.

Your blood ran cold now as he raised his head to meet yours with an evil triumphant smile.

"Aw come on now baby, you think I wouldn't let Abe have a front row seat to me seducing his lady love so god damn easily?"

"No…." You pushed him off of you, horrified tears welling up inside of you.

You didn't want to be here when Abel came back out, but you knew you had to explain.

"Don't be so upset sexy," he made a fake sad face as he placed a thumb under your chin. You jerked your face away, spitting at him.

"I can't believe I thought--"

"Thought what?" He challenged you. "Go on, say it so Honest Abe can hear it. You thought you could fuck me and enjoy it with a free pass, admit it,"

"Never" You growled.

"Fine, have it your way. We'll see what your boy scout boyfriend has to say about all of this," he cackled, as his face morphed.

"No no no…" you begged, but it was too late. You saw the heartbroken look on Abel's face.

"Abel…" You tried to hold his hand but he snapped it away.

"I...I can't even look at you," He got up and went to get "his" leather jacket off the floor.

"Abel please," You jumped up and ran over to him while tears streamed down your face. You picked him up off the floor and forced his face to look at you. His green eyes were red with his own tears.

"Are you trying to make up with me or just trying to get Ripper to stay?" He sniffled angrily.

"If I just wanted Ripper do you think I'd shove him off and get angry at him for hurting you?" You tried wiping the tears from your face, but he shoved you away.

"He didn't hurt me, you did!" He started

"Abel, please…." You grabbed him again, forcing him to look at you.

“I...I need some time,” He looked at you sadly, sadder than you’d ever seen him before.

Tears were dripping down his face, his lip quivered. You didn’t care what he said, you threw your arms around him and pulled him as tightly as you could against your body, sobbing into his chest.

“Baby I’m so, so sorry…” Your muffled apologies came out into his chest.

His left hand lifted away from you and ran slowly, gently down your back, while he sniffed your hair.

“Oh it’s alright baby, he’ll understand. In time,” The familiar eerily dark voice whispered in your ear. You pulled back and were looking into the devil’s green eyes once again.

“W-What…?” You muttered, not sure if you should be scared or relieved.

“Abel’s gonna take a little...well needed rest,” Ripp’s deep voice rumbled with evil giddiness.

“I…” You fought within yourself to be more upset about this, but at least you didn’t have to choose between the two of them right this second.

“Well...alright,” You finally let go and gave him a mischievous smile.

“That’s my girl,” He threw the jacket across the room once again as he carried you to the bedroom.

“Time to really dance with the devil,”

#abel plenkov x you #abel plenkov x reader #abel plenkov #riverton ripper x reader #riverton ripper x you #the ripper x reader #the ripper x you #my soul to take #my soul to take (2010)#raul esparza #raul esparza angst

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a-bang-for-your-bucky · 4 years ago

Text

Playin' With Fire: Into The Flames

Summary: Santiago has some shit he needs to figure out. THE MISSION. Dani has some shit she needs to figure out. Will is an angel. Catfish just wants to get home to his baby. Benny's just along for the ride.

WARNINGS: SMUT(18+), EXPLICIT LANGUAGE, Movie typical violence, people get shot, Tom is an asshole, like straight up, mention of pregnancy, because again Tom is an ASSHOLE.

Word Count: 7,453

At the bar, Santiago was outside waiting for Frankie and Dani. He didn’t know why it bothered him so much, They needed to talk, especially if they were going to work this mission together. But a part of him didn’t want them to. He remembered how close they were. He knew he was being selfish. He had her to himself for three years.

He heard Frankie’s chevy long before it pulled into the parking lot. He parked it right next to Will’s. It took everything he had not to run to her. She and Frankie walked up to the entrance, his arm slung over her shoulder. Santi’s heart all but crumbled. Why did this bother him?

“Hey, Santi.” Dani smiled, removing herself from Frankie’s hold. Frankie opened the door for her but didn’t follow.

“I gotta talk to Pope real quick. Go on ahead. Ben’s probably thinking you left the country again.” Frankie told her. She gave him the stink eye, sticking out her tongue. Dani went on inside though because Frankie was right.

Once she was in the building and the door was shut, Frankie turned to his friend. “You’re an idiot.” He blurted out. Santi tossed him a confused look.

“Wh-what?” Santi was surprised at Frankie’s blunt words. Frankie kicked a rock in front of him, frustrated that his friend is being so dumb.

“You fuckin’ idiot. You had her, man.” Exasperated with Santiago, Frankie threw a finger in his face, accusingly. “You fuckin’ had her.”

Santiago scoffed, shaking his head side to side, “You don’t know what you’re fucking talking about, hermano.” Santi shoved his hands into the pocket of his jeans, turning away from the man in front of him.

Frankie’s fingers tightened into a fist. He wasn’t gonna hit him, at least not yet. “I know she’s heartbroken. I spent the last twenty minutes talking about it.” He scoffed. Santiago was not a stupid man, quite the opposite, so it blew Frankie’s mind that he was acting like this.

“Yeah? Did she tell you that it was her idea? That she didn’t want a relationship because of you?!” Venom dripped off of Santiago’s words. He wasn’t trying to hurt his friend, but Frankie had no idea what the fuck had transpired in the last 36 months.

“She did, actually.” Frankie informed his friend. “Pope, man. What is wrong with you?” Frankie removed his ‘standard oil’ cap, running his fingers through his hair. Santiago huffed a breath.

“If you would have just stayed away from Vanessa, you two would be together; She’d be Ellie’s mom. You’re the reason she ran to Colombia with me in the first place!” Santiago’s voice echoed through the empty parking lot. Without a second thought, Frankie's fist collided with Santiago's jaw.

“Oh. I didn’t realize it was my fault you can’t keep your fucking dick in your pants!” Frankie shot back at him, struggling to hold back the anger bubbling inside him. “I know I fucked things up with her, but I got Elena out of it. She’s worth more to me than anything. Don't ever think for a second that anyone matters more, including Dani.” Frankie relaxed his fists, thinking about his daughter. “What do you have, cabrón?”

Santiago let Frankie’s words sink in. He was right. What did he have? Santiago took a seat on the sidewalk of the bar, running a hand down his face, hissing when he rubbed the tender spot on his lip. “Fuck, Fish.” Santiago sighed, looking up at his friend, eyes pleading for help. “I don’t know how to fix it.”

Frankie joined Santiago on the ground. “You tell her, hermano.”

“Tell her what? ‘Sorry for sleeping around on you, even though I’m pretty sure I’m madly in love with you. I just wanted to give you what I thought you wanted.’ I mean she’d go for that right?” Santiago rambled.

“Pope, you’ve lived with her, slept with her, and have cared for her for three years. Get your fucking shit together and talk to her." With that, Frankie walked inside to join the rest of the group. He left Santiago sitting there, mind churning over the words they had shared.

"FISH!" Benny yelled as he saw Frankie filter through the small crowd to their table. "Where's Pope?" He asked, and Frankie turned around to see Pope was nowhere in sight. Dani instantly noticed Frankie's red knuckles from where he had hit Santiago.

Dani looked up at Frankie with concerned eyes, "Where is he, Frankie?" She whispered. Frankie pointed toward the door. She shot up from the table, weaving through the crowd and out the door. She found Santiago standing by Will's truck.

"Santi?" She called out to him, causing him to lift his head. She could barely see the blooming bruise on his lip, but she knew it was there. She reached him in just a few short steps, wrapping her arms around him. He returned the gesture, holding her tightly. "Are you okay?" She whispered into his hold.

He didn't answer right away, he just pulled her closer. He nuzzled into her hair, breathing in the lavender scent. "I'm okay, beautiful. Don't you worry. Frankie was just knocking some sense into me." He mumbled against her. He was okay, as long as she was in his arms. The two of them stood there for a while, not wanting to let each other go. No other words were spoken, they only held onto the comfort that they had become accustomed to. Dani didn’t even realize she was crying until she pulled away from him, and wet stains were left in her wake.

“I’m sorry.” She apologized, wiping her eyes. “Come on,” She grabbed his hand, “They’re probably missing us.” She told him as she pulled him back toward the bar. He let her lead him, enjoying her hand in his. He had to tell her. He halted in his steps, jerking her back into his arms.

“Wha-” She started, but was cut off by his lips on hers. Sighing, she melted into his hold. Their lips moving in sync. There was no rush, but Santiago kissed her with urgency, wanting her to feel the emotion flowing through him. When they parted, she sucked in a breath, her lungs burning for oxygen. She went to speak, but before she could he placed another soft peck to her lips.

“You don’t have to say anything. Just know that we need to talk before we leave. Promise me, we will talk.” Santiago still held her hand, looking into her eyes as he spoke, “Promise me.” He said again. She nodded, telling him that she promised. With her confirmation, they walk back into the bar with the rest of their friends.

Back at the Miller house, they all stumbled through the door, laughing like children. Dani thought it was nice for them to feel so care free before the mission. She left the guys behind, wanting to shower before bed. Santiago watched as she walked away. He wanted nothing more than to follow her down the hall, strip her down, and make love to her like he should. Instead, he plopped himself down on the couch with a groan.

Will sat himself beside him. “So, Fish clocked you, huh?” He asked. No one had brought up the fact that Santi had a busted lip and Fish had a busted knuckle. Santiago nodded. “Can’t say you didn’t deserve it.” Will shrugged, crossing his arms.

“Thanks, man.” Santiago scoffed, “I know I fucked up, okay. All I want is to make it right. But I can’t.” Santi wiped his face. “She deserves so much better than me.” Will shook his head.

“Let her make that choice. You opened that door when you asked her to go to Colombia with you.” Will advised him, “I’m sure Frankie told you this already, but talk to her.” Will slapped him on the knee before heading off to bed. Santiago followed suit, walking down the hall to Dani’s room.

He was wringing his hands as he stood outside of her door. It had already been decided that they would stay with Ben and Will until they left. He knew he was welcome inside, he just couldn’t find the courage to open the damn door. With Frankie and Will’s words prominent on his mind, he raised his hand, landing three small knocks to the wood.

She opened the door, clad in a towel, blonde hair still dripping from the shower. “Santi? Why did you knock?” She asked, moving back into the room to let him in. He walked inside, closing the door behind him.

“Oh, um. I didn’t know. I mean, I thought maybe you’d want privacy, since we weren’t in Colombia.” He fumbled through the sentence. Santiago wasn’t a nervous person. He could shut down, manipulate, whatever he needed to do to complete his mission. When it came to expressing his feelings though, he was a wreck. Dani noticed his change in demeanor.

She sat on the bed, the same bed where they first slept together. “I told you, while we’re here, this is your room, too.” She wanted him to feel comfortable. He just nodded in response, still standing by the closed door. “Okay, what is going on with you, Garcia?” She asked, the words coming out a little harsher than she wanted.

“Can we talk now?” His voice was low, his head even lower as he looked at the floor. She stood up, which caught his attention. His eyes roamed over her bare legs, up to where the towel rested right below the apex of her thighs. He felt his cock stir in the confines of his jeans. No, not now, he thought to himself.

“Yeah, let me just get dressed.” She disappeared into the en suite bathroom. Santiago took the moment to adjust himself in his pants. He needed to tell her with words how he felt, not his dick. She emerged from the bathroom in his Metallica shirt, the same shirt she wore the last time they had sex. She was not making this easy for him. “What’s up, Santi?” She hopped onto the bed, crossing her legs under her, exposing her deep maroon panties to him.

He groaned and turned away from her. “Querida, please. I’m trying here.” His voice was strained. He was fighting the urge to take her right there. He heard shuffling, and she told him to turn around. She had covered herself with the blanket. He mumbled a thank you before sitting on the bed beside her. It was all so familiar. This was where everything had started between them. Santiago couldn’t help but think it was fitting for this to be where it ended.

Dani watched as Santiago seemed to search for words to say. “Dani,” He started. He almost never called her by her name. This wasn’t good. She swallowed harshly, trying to ease the constricted feeling in her throat. “You are, fuck, you are phenominal.” Santiago said, taking her hand in his. “You deserve everything that is good in this world. And I’m sorry I kept you from that.” Tears pricked his eyes. Dani’s breath caught in her chest.

“Santi, I don’t. I don’t understand.” Her voice broke. She didn’t know where he was going with this.

Santiago squeezed her hand. “I was selfish with you. I was so fucking selfish. And I hurt you in return. There aren’t enough apologies that will fix that.” Santiago didn’t cry, but a single tear rolled down his face. “I have to let you go.” He sounded conflicted, and he was. He wanted to keep being selfish, but letting her go, getting her away from him, was the right thing to do.

Dani shook her head, “No. You don’t get to make that decision for me.” She cried, “How do you know what I deserve?” The sadness in her voice tugged at his heart. She moved to sit up on her knees, still holding his hand. “Santi, these last three years with you have been amazing. You are amazing. Why would you ever think anything less?”

Santiago met her eyes. They shimmered in the low light of the bedside lamp. “I’m not capable of being who you want me to be.” He swallowed hard.

“How do you know what I want, Pope?! You haven’t asked me!” She raised her voice, the alcohol in her system affected her volume control. Santiago was sure the whole house heard her. She pulled him closer, grabbing his other hand. “I don’t know why, but I love you, you dope, I would walk through hell and back for you.” She confessed.

Her blue eyes met his brown ones. “You shouldn’t love a man like me, princess.” Santiago protested, releasing her hands to caress her face. Her skin was soft, but wet from the tears. She shook her head side to side, moving her face closer to his.

“Too late,” She whispered before pressing her lips to his. He pulled her closer if it were possible. His lips parted, tongue prying hers open. She instantly gave him access. His hands found their way down her back, to her ass. He gripped the tight muscle, pulling her into his lap. He moved them up the bed with skill as they fought for dominance. The kiss got more aggressive. He was the one who broke the kiss, only to find his way to that spot on her collarbone.

“Santi,” She moaned. He continued his way up her neck, nibbling on her ear, before returning his lips for a quick kiss. His hands hooked her panties, dragging them down her legs, as he moved off the bed. He unbutton his jeans, removing them and his underwear in one go. Once his pants were out of the way, he took his place back between her thighs. She could feel him hard against her thigh. They both knew there would be no foreplay, that this was something else. He couldn’t say the three words that were floating in the air, he didn’t know if he was capable.

Her hands were buried in his salt and pepper curls, leaving love bites on his neck. “Fuck, hermosa. I need you.” He groaned, rocking himself through her wet folds.

“Then take me, Santi.” That was all he needed to sheath himself to the hilt in one swift thrust.

The ride into the jungle of South America was bumpy to say the least. Dani had made herself comfortable in the back with Frankie, almost falling asleep a few times. Santi backed the SUV into the jungle thick, expertly hiding it from the view of the road. Santi gave Dani the bag of comms. “Pass those out.” He instructed her as he gave out weapons. Dani didn’t like the feel of a gun in her hand, she was a healer, not a killer. They separated as they stalked through the jungle up to Lorea’s house.

Dani wasn’t sure why she let herself get caught up in this as she laid between Santi and Tom on the forest ground. The boys were clogging up the comms with witty banter and stupid jokes. She was barely paying attention until she heard Frankie’s voice.

“Pope. Pope, I have kids over here. Does he have kids living with him? Cause that’s gonna make things a whole lot more complicated and is not what I signed up for.” The worry was thick in his voice. Dani only assumed it was because he was now a father himself. Thankfully, she had planned for this.

“The family’s not the problem, Frankie. They’re the answer.” She replied instantly, and Tom gave her a weird look.

Frankie asked why and Pope had a simple answer. Church. “Lorea is very devout. Every Sunday morning, He sends three guards to the 6am service. When they get back, he sends the rest of the team, along with the family.”

“That leaves him and three guards in that house with the money. That’s our window.” Dani finished for him.

“Well aren’t you guys fucking cute, finishing each other’s sentences and shit.” Tom snickered into the comm. Dani wanted to punch him.

Will stalked through some brush, making his way to his check point, “Why would he do that?”

“He’s worried about someone taking his kids, and he never leaves his money. Also, I don’t think he believes anyone would have the balls to rob him.” Santiago answered him, chuckling a little at the end.

“That’s probably because it’s a stupid idea.” Dani could hear Will roll his eyes.

Benny broke the silence, “Pope, I got your girlfriend coming up right now. Holy shit, she is beautiful.” Dani clenched her jaw. She told Santiago that she loved him, and he never said the words back. The night of Benny’s fight, she was sure they made love. It was a completely different feeling. They still weren’t officially a couple, she didn’t know if they ever would be.

“I fucking knew it.” Tom groaned, looking over Dani to Pope.

“Fuck off.” Santi growled, not missing the look he received from Dani. Santi knew that he messed things up with Dani. He loved her and instead of telling her, he had sex with her. It was different that time, though. It was more passionate, more meaningful. He knew what he was getting himself into when he started sleeping with Yovanna, but that didn’t stop him from doing it. He just hoped that one day, Dani would forgive him.

“God damn.” Will whispered, “I got an execution about to go down over here.”

“Are you at the tennis court? That’s his spot of choice.” Dani responded, knowing that’s where Lorea liked to do business. The gunshots made Dani jump and Tom sighed.

“We can’t babysit you. If you can’t handle some gunshots, maybe you shouldn’t be out here.” He growls at her. She moves to get up, but Santi grabs her arm. She looked over at him, waiting for him to say something, but he didn't.

“Shit, we got ground sensors here.” Benny’s muttered voice crackled through the comm, breaking up the tension, looking down at his feet.

“Did you hit one?” Santi asked, quickly.

“I’m not sure.” Benny replied frozen in his place. “That stock boy job at wal-mart is starting to look pretty good right now boys.” He huffs out as two guards on motorcycles approach his location, but swiftly turn around. It was a close call; Too fucking close.

“Let’s get the fuck outta here.” Will huffed, once it was confirmed that the informant made it out.

The bar was quiet, minus Benny telling some dumb story about how he almost pissed himself. Santiago tossed back his shot and Dani sat quietly, enjoying their company, nursing her tequila on ice. Will asked what the plan was and how Santiago was going to present to the agency.

Santi told the guys the real plan. He wanted to pull the job with just them. He didn’t want to involve the local government. He knew that with his team, they could get it done and take the money for themselves. The guys were pissed.

“Who paid our fees?” Will asked him, and Frankie pointed to Will indicating that he had the same question. They all had the same question.

“It’s complicated.” Santiago told them.

Tom scoffed, “How fucking complicated can it be? It’s a hundred thou-” Frankie stopped him as a group of men walked in. Dani told the guys she was getting the bill. Frankie sarcastically thanked her as she walked away.

“Well fellas,” Benny started, “This turned out to be some full on cowboy shit.” He finished before down the rest of his beer.

The guys moved back to the car. Santi was mid speech when Dani rejoined them. “You may not believe it, but I have spent the last three years of my life trying to make a difference. But it’s a fucking mess.”

“Santi’s right.” Dani spoke and the five guys turned to her. “Lorea has people everywhere. You have no idea what it’s been like for us.”

“Come on, guys.” Santi started, and pointed at Tom. “This man is a goddamn hero and can’t even afford to put his kids through college.” He turned to Fish, “You are the most talented pilot I know and you’re grounded on some bullshit coke rap.” He finally looked at Will. “How many times can your brother get the shit knocked out of-” Benny cut him off.

“I didn’t get the shit beat out of me. I won that fight.”

“Sorry, Benny.” Santi apologized.

“How many more pep talks can you possibly give, man? I’m done. Both knees are shot. That neck surgery I got last year made everything worse.” Dani had never heard Santi sound so hopeless.

“What about her?” Tom asked, pointing to Dani.

“What about me, Tom? You got a fucking problem with me being involved?” She questioned him, wanting to know what his deal was.

“I just don’t see why your involvement is necessary.” He spat at her, crossing his arms.

“This was my fucking plan. I helped with every part of this recce.” Dani growled at him, hands clenching by her side. Santi noticed and stepped between the two.

“Come on, man. I’ve trained her. She helped prep all of this. She’s in or no one is in.” Santi defended her. Tom shut up real quick. “I guess the question is, do we finally get to use our skills to our own benefit and actually change something?”

On the drive back from the bar, Tom had come up with a fool proof plan, “Sunday Soft Hit” he called it. Dani sat in the back with Benny and let the guys talk it out. Tom made it very clear that this was their area of expertise, she was just along for the ride. She watched as rain drops rolled down the window. She really hated the rain.

The next day, Pope had left to meet up with his informant. Dani tried not to let them see how much it bothered her that he went alone. That he didn’t want her to go. She tried to let Benny distract her with his silly jokes, but still in the back of her mind, all she could think about was Santiago.

They met him at a shipping container yard. He had a key to one, pulling open the doors. Santi was prepared for this moment. Every fucking gun, bullet, toothpick was sourced in-country, he was ready to pin this on a local rival gang. Santiago’s informant had come through with the recording of inside the house and promised to get an extra van into the compound.

They had everything they needed; The bird, the extra van, and Lorea confirmed inside the house with the money. Tom was conflicted about the whole situation, and that made Dani uncomfortable. She kept her thoughts to herself, not wanting to start another fight with the captain. Tom gave a speech about how they could get out now if they wanted. Dani honestly thought it was touching, but none of them were turning back; The six of them were really going to do this.

“It’s a good thing these guys are so devout.” Benny started, looking up at the sky as the rain poured down, “Our dad used to say ‘when it’s raining, it means God didn’t need us in church today’.” Dani smiled at the comment. She really missed Mister Miller.

They watched intently as the guards piled the family in the vehicle to leave. None of them caught sight of Lorea. The family had left for church, and the informant showed up with the extra van. “Damn, Pope. This lady is a keeper. Punctual, smart, and brave as shit.” Benny spoke into the comms. Dani rolled her eyes, jealousy did not become her, but she didn’t care.

She entered the house behind Santiago. Two of the three guards were subdued easily by the former Delta members, but Frankie shot the third in the knee when he walked up on him and Will. “Eyes out for Lorea. He sure as fuck heard us now.” Santiago groaned, helping Frankie bound and gag the guard. Dani quickly went to work setting off the charges in the security room.

The five men searched the house, but Lorea was nowhere to be found. They were almost frantic looking around the property. “Everyone to the office right now.” Tom growled into their ear pieces.

“What’s going on?” Dani harshly whispered into the comm but didn’t get an answer. Before she could ask again, Santi grabbed her, pulling her upstairs with him. Santiago walked into the office to see his former teammates. They were pissed.

“What the fuck?” Benny was the first to speak, tossing an empty money bag to the floor. Dani looked around the room. Something wasn’t right.

“Lorea?” Tom asked, and Santi shook his head.

“He’s gone with the money.” Will scoffed, dropping into a chair.

“Your girl gave us up, Pope.” Frankie sighed, leaning back against the desk. “We gotta get the fuck outta here.” Dani hated hearing the regret in his voice. What the fuck did she do?

Santi ripped off his hat, “No, no, no, no.” He repeated as he removed his pack. How did this happen? He looked around, distraught written on his face, before taking a deep breath. “What’s that smell like to you?”

Frankie looked up at his friend, “Like a serious fuck up.” Will chuckled at Frankie’s sarcasm.

“No,” Santi shook his head, pointing to the painting equipment by the desk. “Paint.” He scrambled to the nearest wall, running his hand down it, before drawing back and punching hard. Dani watched curiously, wondering if Santi had finally lost his mind. He punched again, breaking through the drywall.

He ripped the debris out of his way, reaching a hand into the wall, pulling out a wad of cash. “La casa es la caja fuerte.” She mumbled, “The house is the fucking safe.” She laughed, picking up on what Santiago had just figured out.

The six of them started tearing down the wall and stacks of money fell out. They quickly packed it into bags and carried them down stairs. Santiago was still concerned about finding Lorea as they pulled out more and more stacks, packing them away. The more money they dug out though, the less confident Dani felt in the situation. Tom was getting carried away, determined that they had time for “A couple more loads”. Benny assured her that Tom never missed a hard out, and here he was, making up some bullshit about a fifteen minute cushion.

“Fuck this. Time’s up, we gotta go.” Will growled, glaring at Tom. Dani finished packing her bag, handing it off to Benny.

“I want one more sweep for Lorea, alright! Then we burn it all down.” Santi all but demanded. “Tequila, stay with someone.” She nodded, and walked into the bedroom with Will and Santiago, gun raised. She opened the wardrobe door and there was nothing but clothes inside.

Suddenly, the whole thing moved, and Lorea shot at her. She returned a single shot, straight to where his femoral artery would be and the man fell to the ground. Santi walked up and fired one, two, three, more shots at him to ensure he was dead. He stood over the dead body, reloading his pistol.

“Fuck, I’m hit.” Dani and Will groaned together, Will dropping to his knees. Will was bleeding from his left side and Dani had a through and through on her left shoulder. Santi whipped around to see Will and Dani both kneeling on the floor. Blood was soaking her shirt, as he charged over to her.

“You’re hit?” Will asked, eyeing her shoulder, and she nodded. “Fuck, Teq. You shoulda stayed home.” He groaned the last word as she put more pressure on the wound. “Get me the clot kit. I’ll be fine” He grumbled.

Santi dug through the bag on Dani’s back, handing her a kit, getting one out for her as well.

“What are we shooting at in here?” Frankie yells as he walks into the room. He immediately notices that Dani is bleeding. “Fuck, Dani.” Even though he wanted to, he didn’t move toward her, because Santi was already there, applying her clot kit.

“I told you this was a stupid idea.” Will spoke through clenched teeth, looking at both Dani and Santi.

“Yeah, you did Will. Here ya go.” Dani agreed, wrapping his abdomen with a bandage. She hissed as Santiago did the same to her shoulder. Things had shifted between them. Will had never seen Santiago so attentive during a mission.

“Sunday school’s over fellas. We gotta go. Oh, holy Shit.” Benny says as he sees the scene before him. His brother was bleeding from his abdomen, Dani from her shoulder. He told them that the first shift of guards were back and that they needed to go. The rest of it was a blur. Dani barely remembered getting down stairs, let alone into the van with Frankie. She looked back to the house and it was ablaze. It was over, they just needed to get home safely.

The drive up to the meeting point for the helo was a short one. At least, it seemed short. Dani had gone into shock. “Fish, I don’t feel so good. I don’t think the bleeding has stopped.” She whimpered with her head against the window, the hand holding pressure on her wound was bloody.

“Just hold on tight, hermosa.” She heard Frankie say before everything went dark.

She woke up with someone jostling her. It was Santiago, who was carrying her bridal style out of the van. “Hey, querida. You with me?” He asked, laying her on the ground, her head propped up on a bag.

“I’m here, Santi. I should have some bandages and extra kits in my bag. I brought them in case one of you idiots needed it. Turns out, I’m the idiot.” She laughed as he dug through her bag, holding up the tool once he found it.

“This is going to hurt, hermosa. You want to take a swig first?” He asked, showing her a bottle of tequila she packed just in case. She nodded, taking a generous swig, hissing at the burn of the liquor going down. “Alright, Teq. Ready?” She groaned as he redressed the wound. It would need stitches to ensure it heals decently, but they would have to wait.

“Thank you.” She whispered when he was done. “Let me go take care of Will.” She took the bottle of liquor over to Will. “This is going to hurt like a bitch. You might want to.” She offered him the bottle. He took a quick gulp, before gesturing to her. She shook her head no. She was able to stitch Will up while the other guys loaded the helo. She looked over and saw Fish yelling at Tom as she started working on the stitches.

“If we want to get to the ocean, we gotta fly over the fucking Andes, man!” Frankie yelled about the weight issue. Dani and Will leaned onto each other as they walked toward the helo. Tom groaned about leaving two hundred million dollars on the runway. “Fine! She’ll make it. Let’s go!” Frankie ordered.

Dani was seated in the back of the helo between Benny and Will. Benny was helping her stitch up her shoulder. Dani couldn’t help it but her eyes trailed over to Santi who was staring at Yovanna, the informant. Jealousy and bile rose in her throat. “I’m good, Ben. Thank you.” She looked up and saw Tom staring at her, his eyes dropping to her hand that was splayed over her abdomen, then back to her, with a knowing look on his face.

They dropped Yovanna and her brother across the Peruvian border. Tom escorted them off the helo. Santi joined him with a bag of money and an envelope with documents. Once Santiago was sure they were good to go, they were back in the air. “She’s lying.” Tom said and Santi disagreed. “There’s consequences to this shit. You know what we should have done?” He deadpanned.

Dani couldn’t believe him. He wanted to kill her? After everything she did to help? “That’s one you wouldn’t come back from.” Will attested. Tom just ripped the headset off before moving into the cockpit with Frankie. Santi didn’t spare Dani a second glance as he laid back against a duffle and shut his eyes. She sighed, leaning into Benny, closing her own.

Frankie was constantly watching the gauges on the dashboard. It seemed as if they were going to make it, even with the weight issue. Everything was going smooth until it wasn’t. “We’re red-lining, man.” Santi’s voice was on the headset as he peered over his friend’s shoulder. Frankie was adamant that they needed to lose some weight. Dani heard Tom complain about leaving fifty million dollars in the middle of the jungle. He is going to get us fucking killed, she thought. Frankie shot back, standing his ground, asking if he wanted to make it to the ocean. Tom conceded; Will opened the door so Santi and Benny could throw out some bags.

It seemed to work for a moment. Frankie tried raising the helo up over the lowest peak he could find. There was rapid beeping and the aircraft started jerking. One of the gearboxes blew and the helo started to drop. There was a reason Santi wanted Catfish. He really was the best. He immediately regained control of the craft, maneuvering it so that it didn’t go into a spin.

“I’m losing altitude. We should land. We should land now.” Frankie grunted, trying to come up with a landing plan.

“Crash land here and we all will die.” Tom snapped at him. Frankie gripped the cyclic tighter.

“I’m trying to get her back to flat. There was a farm, not too far back.” Frankie growled back at him, trying to make sure he gets the craft to ground as safely as possible.

“Prepare for a hard landing!” Tom called the warning over his shoulder toward the back of the helo. Dani had one hand gripped to the wall, the other was attached to Benny’s leg.

“I can’t land with this thing with that net under us. We lose the money, maybe we don't die.” Frankie tried to reason with him, but Tom didn’t want to budge.

“LOSE THE MONEY OR WE WILL ALL DIE!” Fish’s voice boomed through the headsets as he tried to keep the helo steady. “Pull the external load release on the wall!” Dani looked over her right shoulder to the lever. She looked back at Santi, like she wanted permission.

“Pull the lever, Tequila!” Santi yelled, giving her the okay. She pulled it down with a struggle.

Will opened the hatch. Dani took a spot next to him, looking at the net. “It didn’t work!” Dani was terrified.

“There should be a manual override on the cargo hook.” Frankie explained. Benny crawled out the hatch and kicked the handle. The net of money fell to the earth below them. The helo jerked before Benny could climb back in, knocking him further out. Luckily, Will was able to grab him, preventing him from dropping straight to the ground. It became obvious to the man dangling from the floor of the chopper that he would die if it crashed with him barely hanging on.

“I gotta jump!” Benny yelled, releasing the grip on his brother’s arm and tumbled to the ground, just in time for the helo to crash hard. He ran back to the smoking wreckage. “Tequila! Fish!” Benny bellowed as he dodged shrapnel from the crash.

Dani groaned as she moved from where she landed on top of Santi. “You okay, cariño?” He asked her, and she remembered that Benny fell out of the fucking helo. “Benny?!” She yelled into Santi’s face, scrambling to get up.

She stumbled up to the front, where Fish and Redfly were crawling through the busted windshield. “Benny?!” She called again. He kneeled down into view, reaching for her.

“I’m good, Tequila. I’m good. Come on, I gotcha.” He said as he helped her through the broken plexiglass. She crawled out, trying to make sure no one had any lethal injuries.

“Oh, Fish.” She whispered, looking at the nasty gash on his face. She pulled some gauze out of her vest pocket and tried to clean it, but he pulled away.

“I’m okay, Tequila. Tom, they’re getting into the fucking net.” Frankie yelled over her, pointing to the villagers.

Climbing out of the overturned helo, Santiago looked over at Dani who was next to Frankie. Pushing down the bubbling jealousy, Pope asked, “What’s the plan here?”

“Benny cover us from under that treeline there, to the right. Frankie, you and Tequila take the left, while Pope and I go look as peaceful as we can.” Tom paused, “That’s cocaine they’re growing, so they probably already have weapons trained on us.” Pope was apprehensive about Dani leaving his side, but he knew she’d be safe with Fish.

“Comms are dead, so we use hand signals.” Pope informed the group before he stepped between Dani and Frankie. He caressed her face before placing a kiss to her lips. He didn't know what had possessed him to do it. They were in the middle of a cocaine field, and they just survived a helicopter crash.

“Be safe.” She whispered where only he could hear. Tom called him away and Frankie grabbed her arm, pulling her in the opposite direction.

Frankie and Dani moved into position on the left hill. She raised her rifle, peering through the scope. “Hey, put the gun down.” Fish told her, “You don’t need to do this.”

She scoffed at his words. “If it comes down to you guys or these people, I will choose you guys, no questions asked.” She trained her eyes back to the field. This wasn’t the same girl Frankie met almost five years ago. She was different, harder. Like the time she spent here changed her. Pope had changed her.

They watched as Tom and Santiago tried to reason with the Farmers. Dani could see through her scope that Santi tried to keep his hands up, away from his weapon; Whereas, Tom’s flitted above the hand gun the whole time.”Frankie.” Dani whispered, “What is that?” She asked him, seeing that one of the farmers looked like they were going to draw a weapon. All she could think about was Santi.

He hated being so far away, even through the scope, Frankie couldn’t get a good look at what was going on down in the valley. “Pope, is that a weapon?” Frankie spoke into the dead comm. Dani moved his hand off the button and shook her head. “Fuck!” Fish yelled, as shots were fired by Tom. He let off one shot before they moved down to the rest of the group.

Dani all but ran down the hillside. “Santi!” She called out for him, seeing him just beyond the bodies. He turned when he heard her voice. “Santi!” She collided with him. “You fucking scared me.” Dani's voice cracked a little. He didn’t speak, he just lifted his eyes to her. She could see the regret, the pain. Santi didn’t shoot, that much she knew.

Was it an avoidable blood bath? Probably not. Who knows though. What they did know, was that Tom fucked up. Santiago sat down with the village leader and was able to pay the ‘debt’ owed and acquire some mules to help carry the bags. Dani knew though, all the money in the world couldn’t replace the men, the family, that those people lost. As they moved away from the small village, Dani took one last look back. Her eyes connected with a young man for a split second before turning around and walking on.

Trudging through the woods was what they wanted to steer clear of, for Will’s sake, but here they were. The six of them led the mules down a beaten path. All of them stuck in their own heads until Will addressed Tom. He asked about the payment for the damage they had caused. Once Tom answered, Will stopped, turning to the man. “Which one of you shot first?”

Tom looked at his former teammate. “I don’t know.” The lie slid off his tongue easily. Dani watched from behind Santiago. Will rolled his eyes, not buying Tom’s shit.

“We need to watch ourselves here.” Will told him, before turning around, leading his mule on. Santiago nodded his head, agreeing out loud with Will’s statement.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Tom growled at Santi.

“Nothing. We just have to watch ourselves, that’s all.” Santiago responded, not wanting to stoke anymore fires. They had to get through the fucking forrest. And it t was fucking raining, again. They found a rock formation to hold up under to try and wait it out.

“How far have we gone?” Benny asked Santiago as he looked at their map.

“About twelve clicks. And it’s another day and a half to the boat.” Santi responded, putting the map away.

“How are you holding up, princess?” Tom asked, condescendingly. Dani had been quiet since the farm incident. The other guys shot Tom a look and he just shrugged.

“I’m fine, jackass.” She mumbled, turning away from him, wrapping her raincoat tighter around her.

“You shouldn’t have come out here.” Tom scoffed, shaking his head.

“I’m starting to see why Molly divorced your miserable ass.” She gritted through her chattering teeth.

“The fuck did you just say? You want to get personal?” Tom shot back, “Does Pope know you’re knocked up?” Dani stopped breathing, eyes going wide. She could feel Santi’s eyes burning into the back of her skull. “Oh, yeah. I figured that out in the helo. That’s why she looked like a sad puppy while your informant girl was around. Don’t worry, I’m sure it’s not yours. Could be Frankie’s.” He crossed his arms, and sat back against the rock. Clearly, he was proud of himself.

“You don’t know what the fuck you are talking about Tom. So, shut the fuck up, before I make you.” She stood up and whipped around to face him, ready to throw punches.

Frankie was the one that pulled her back. Tom laughed at this. “God, how is it that you leave the man when he needed you most, running off with his best friend nonetheless, and he is still wrapped around your goddamn finger.”

Dani shrugged out of Frankie’s hold and stormed away into the rain. Shit, she wasn’t pregnant. She had confirmed before they left for the recce. She never would have come out here if she thought she were. She didn’t know how long she stood in the rain before someone touched her shoulder. It was Frankie.

“Teq.” He started, but she cut him off. “Frankie, I’m not. I wouldn’t have-- I wouldn’t be here if I even thought for a second I could be. ” she sobbed. How could Tom just drop a bomb like that.

“está bien, cariño, está bien.” He whispered as he pulled her in for a hug, as her tears mixed with the rain drops on his shirt. “I think you need to talk to Santi.” He mumbled into her hair and she nodded. He walked her over to where Santiago was sitting alone. He looked up when he saw the two coming toward him. Frankie nudged Dani and she moved to sit next to him.

“Were you going to tell me?” He whispered, looking at the ground.

“If there was something to tell, yes. The test I took before we left was negative, I promise.” She tried to explain herself. Santi looked up at her.

“Why would you even come out here?” He mumbled, his eyes falling to her shoulder injury. “Fuck, you got shot, and you were in a helo crash.” Santiago caressed her face, moving his other hand down to her shoulder. “Lo siento, hermosa. I’m going to get you home safe.” He promised her, placing a soft kiss to her lips.

Frankie watched as Santi pulled Dani in for a hug, trying to push down the jealousy stirring in his gut. He had his daughter he needed to get back to, that’s what he needed to focus on. Dani lifted her head from Santi’s shoulder, her eyes meeting Frankie’s. What was she going to do?

Translations:

Hermano: Brother

cabrón: Bastard

Hermosa: Beautiful

está bien: It's okay

cariño: Sweetheart

Lo Siento: I'm sorry

Tags: @mylifeisactuallyamess @danniburgh @speakerforthedead0 @221bshrlocked

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daymansbingerecapsandrankings · 4 years ago

Text

(Originally written on October 8, 2020)

🎵Bang, Bang Bangedy Bang

I said a Bang Bang Bangedy Bang🎵

My How I Met Your Mother Thoughts

I just spent the last nine seasons in New York with the gang that spends all their time in MacLaren’s Pub. SELF FIVE! I have to say, this binge of How I Met Your Mother brought me so much happiness. I started watching this show for the first time back in high school, and I ended up watching the last six seasons as they aired. I remember loving this group of characters, and now I am reminded why. There’s so much chemistry between the five, and it makes for one of my favorite Comedies/Sitcoms of all time. If you’ve read any of my previous Show Thoughts, then you know I’ve been watching several over the course of this lovely Pandemic That Will Just Keep Going. After this rewatch, I’ve decided HIMYM is my third favorite Comedy/Sitcom, right after Boy Meets World and Scrubs.

Now, I know that the Finale is infamous. It’s in the Mount Rushmore of Terrible Endings, and people end up getting a sour taste in their mouth when they bring up the show. Well, it’s been some years. There’s been time to reflect and look back. And, while I’m not in favor of the Finale, I also don’t hate it anymore with the passion of a thousand suns. I just loved watching and growing with the gang, seeing them experience their highs and their lows, their triumphs and their failures. It just hits harder as an adult, like most of these shows assuredly do, and I cherish so many of these episodes and moments.

And now, my rankings for the seasons!

Seasons Rankings

1. Season One

2. Season Four

3. Season Two

4. Season Six

5. Season Eight

6. Season Five

7. Season Three

8. Season Seven

9. Season Nine

My rankings for the girlfriends, purely on how much I like them as a character

The Girlfriends Rankings

1. Robin

2. Tracy

3. Victoria

4. Zoey

5. Stella

6. Jeannette

And now, a ranking of my favorite episodes. From 1-50, these are the ones that stand out above the rest. I consider every single one of these enjoyable.

Favorite Episodes

1. Slap Bet (S2E9)

2. Come On (S1E22)

3. The Limo (S1E11)

4. The Best Burger in New York (S4E2)

5. Ten Sessions (S3E13)

6. The Pineapple Incident (S1E10)

7. Bachelor Party (S2E19)

8. Game Night (S1E15)

9. Oh, Honey (S6E15)

10. Glitter (S6E9)

11. The Duel (S1E8)

12. The Pilot (S1E1)

13. Arriverdverci, Fierro (S2E17)

14. The Over-Correction (S8E10)

15. How Your Mother Met Me (S916)

16. Intervention (S4E4)

17. The Magician’s Code, Part II (S7E24)

18. The Autumn of Break-Ups (S8E5)

19. The Ducky Tie (S7E3)

20. The Best Man (S7E1)

21. The Leap (S4E24)

22. Blitzgiving (S6E10)

23. Three Days of Snow (S4E13)

24. The Scorpion & The Toad (S2E2)

25. Bass Player Wanted (S9E13)

26. The Final Page, Part 2 (S8E12)

27. Duel Citizenship (S5E5)

28. Happily Ever After (S4E6)

29. Farhampton (S8E1)

30. Bro Mitzvah (S8E22)

31. Robin 101 (S5E3)

32. The Magician’s Code, Part I (S7E23)

33. Last Words (S6E14)

34. The Playbook (S5E8)

35. The Time Travelers (S8E20)

36. Splitsville (S8E6)

37. Subway Wars (S6E4)

38. Showdown (S2E20)

39. Drumroll, Please (S1E13)

40. Front Porch (S4E17)

41. Twin Bed (S5E21)

42. Who Wants to be a Godparent? (S8E4)

43. Girls vs. Suits (S5E12)

44. Something Borrowed (S2E21)

45. As Fast As She Can (S4E23)

46. The Wedding Bride (S5E23)

47. The Bracket (S3E14)

48. The Sexless Innkeeper (S5E4)

49. Third Wheel (S3E3)

50. Spoiler Alert (S3E8)

And now, just some thoughts on the show and on the gang!

Ted - I know people don’t like Ted. I don’t actually like Ted all that much. And yet, I found myself rooting for Ted just like I did the first go around. He’s not the worst person in the world, and I would be scared to see half of the decisions we’ve made in the dating game stringed together into a TV show. I know people wouldn’t like me very much for those decisions. Then again, I also don’t get super crazy about details about buildings, I don’t pronounce encyclopedia that way, and he tends to stick his foot in his mouth with this White Man confidence that I just don’t have. With all that being said, I still find Ted being a great friend, a man who is just trying to find the love of his life, and someone who really drives this story with great tales and narration (Bob Saget is the Sixth Man of the Show for just always bringing it). I think Ted does stupid things and he pretty much admits it after the fact. He learns, sometimes, and also doesn’t much like most of us. When he finally found the Mother, when he finally found Tracy, I cared. I cared so much, and I still do. Even though they just shit on her character and don’t give us enough time with her, I almost wonder if that’s a metaphor for the fact that you won’t always have enough time with your loved ones.

Robin - Let’s go to the mall! Yeah! Robin Sparkles is a Canadian Treasure, and so is Robin Scherbatsky. She is one of the best things about this show, and I love her so. Played by Cobie Smulders who I need to see in more stuff, Robin is who we all wanted Ted to maybe be with first. Then we go through all the loops of the HIMYM roller coaster, and a lot of us still wanted them to be together. I was one of them. Yet, she was more than just a romantic plot line for Ted. She was a part of the group who we got to see join it and evolve into a member of their family organically. Robin is fun, loud, full of fun quirks that we get to learn over the course of the series. I was heartbroken when we found out she can’t have children. I was loving the back and forth between her and Barney (the first time), and kind of mad at Barney about being such a crazy ass prankster the second time. Robin shows us just how amazing some gun loving, hockey obsessed Canadian news anchor can be, and how much she cares for her friends.

Lily - Justice Aldrin ends up being one of my favorite characters, even if that gets some curious looks. Yeah, she left Marshall for a summer. Yeah, she had some hesitancy with the marriage and everything. That happens. Lily was also always there for her friends, even if she ends up going a little overboard. She wants Ted to find happiness, and does whatever she can to help. She is there to listen to Robin at all times, and her and Marshall are easily one of the best relationships in TV I’ve ever witnessed. Then we have Lily and Barney which is honestly super underrated. Barney trusts Lily, even though she can’t keep a secret, with all of his emotional problems. Lily is who thought Barney could change before anyone else, and I love seeing their friendship grow from eye rolls to eye tears.

Barney - Oh, Barney. He honestly brings so much annoyance and fun to the show. He’s the friend of the gang who everyone tolerates. He’s the one in the gang who everyone ends up loving just as much as everyone else. Barney shows such a terrible face to the world, sleeping with over 250 women and lying to most of them. He has all these rules that aren’t very ethical. He gives us most of the Misogynism in this show, which is definitely prevalent and makes the show not as strong as it was in the first watch. Still, we get to see Barney grow into someone who wants real love and a happy life. Sure, they show us that his marriage to Robin only lasts three years, but at least they tried. Barney just couldn’t make it work, and that’s honestly who Barney really is. A person who just enjoys sleeping with different people. I was very warmed to see the baby reveal and that Barney becoming a dad was what would change him more than anything. Barney is an underrated friend, and his importance to the gang is legendary.

Marshall - I. Love. Big Fudge. He’s just so fun, caring, goofy, loyal, and everything that I aspire to be in life. For some reason, when watching the show the first time, I related to Ted the most. I was definitely a bit more selfish then. But now, I see that I am a Marshall. He wants to do good in the world, and it drives him so much. He only loves Lily, and his loyalty to their relationship is just Goals. He is also the most fun to watch having a crisis. He gets the big eyes and covers his mouth and just gets obviously super uncomfortable. Some of my favorite moments of the show are also Marshall’s talks with Ted about his feelings for Robin. Any one-on-ones with Marshall and someone else are probably my favorite moments. And yes, I will always root for him over those damn machines!

Last Thoughts:

Sure, the writing wasn’t as sharp or as witty in the later seasons, but I loved the story lines and seeing the gang just live.

Tracy was an amazing character as The Mother, and I truly wonder what could have been if they had given us two full seasons of story with her instead of any episodes of Jeannette.

I really can’t believe Ted told his kids all those stories. A fun premise for a show, but really, not very realistic telling them all that jazz.

Ranjit and Carl are such fun recurring characters that I always enjoyed seeing every time they popped up.

Out of all the recurring jokes and gags, which there are many (y’all said Community has so many, but HIMYM really swings for it), I love the Major/General salute joke. Idk if I just didn’t care for it the first time around or forgot about it, but I just love how silly it is and how they kept it through to the very last episode.

Watching the gang sit at their table in MacLaren’s just hanging out will always make me smile.

#how i met your mother #himym #himym finale #ted mosby #marshall eriksen #lily aldrin #himym barney #himym robin #reviews #recaps #br&r

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hatterstan-shameblog · 4 years ago

Text

Prompt My Own Damn Self #1: Non-Linear Healing

Summary: When you die in Borderland, you don’t die in real life—you simply get transported back to the real world, full memories intact. This proves to be a problem when you see a familiar face while walking down the street...

Genre: Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Enemies-to-Bromance

Warnings: ‼️18+‼️ Language, Death, Violence, Sexual Content (Mentioned)

I based this off a text post or something that was like “hey what if you just go back to your real life after borderland and you see hatter and you’re like ‘wait that’s the guy who stole my cards, slept with my wife, and left me for dead in a game’ like wouldn’t that be kinda funny?” And like...it IS funny. But also we get sad and sentimental.

(Also, yes, I AM prompting myself. What are you, a cop??? Wanna tell me where the law is that says you can’t prompt yourself??? Yeah that’s what I THOUGHT! Come back with a WARRANT)

It’s been three months. Three months since you woke up screaming on the bathroom floor, eyes streaming tears as you thrashed against the tile. Three months of night terrors, three months of therapy, three months of sedatives and breathing exercises and non-linear healing.

Healing. Today, healing comes in the form of a post-lunch stroll through the bustling streets of Tokyo. Crowds never made you nervous, before, but now... Well. Things are different, now.

You busy yourself, your brain and your eyes, looking at the swirl of colors and shapes bustling around you. Breathe in, breathe out. There are no games here, no death looming around the corner, no lasers to clip through your cranium and shoot out below your jaw.

And then, you see him. A mirage? A trauma memory? A ghost? No. A man. Slouching against the door frame of a shop, face turned up towards the sky, cigarette smouldering between his middle and index fingers. He looks content. Happy, even.

Fear hits first, like a punch to the gut. Then, bubbling rage. Of all the people, of all the miserable sons of bitches to run into on the street—

You’re weaving through the crowd now, slipping between couples and sidestepping shoppers, vision shifting red and fists clenching. You want to punch him. You want to knock the stupid hat off his head and feel his trachea crunch beneath your palms. You want—

“You wanna buy a hat?”

You freeze.

“Hatter,” you say.

He looks up at the sign above his head, then to the hats in the shop window. Then, back at you.

“Uh...yeah?”

You grab him by the lapels of his loose-fitting shirt and pull him up, noses centimeters from bumping together.

“You...” your voice comes out guttural, growling, “you stole my cards, you fucked my wife, and then you fucking shot me with a goddamn crossbow!”

“Ooooooh,” and Hatter has the decency to at least hint at remorse, his mouth turning downwards into an exaggerated frown, “You were...y’know...there.”

You shake him.

“I should kill you for what you did—“

“—Probably should, but can we just...” His eyes dart left and right, taking notice of the few people who have stopped to watch a potential altercation unfold, “Inside, please? Getting mugged outside your own shop is, uh, not the best look...”

And you let him go, only to grab him by the collar and drag him through the doorway. Then, you slam the door shut, the little bell above it chiming manic and merry as you push Hatter to the floor.

“Okay, you’re upset with me. I get it. I’m upset with me, too,” He’s still on the floor, half-reclining on bent elbows, palms open and facing outwards in an attempt to calm you down, “The card thing was wrong. It was wrong, and it was messed up, and I’m sorry.”

“You think I give a flying fuck about the cards?”

“No! No, uh,” He cowers when you kneel on the floor and grab him by the shirt collar once more, arm reeling back for a punch, “Oh! I’m also sorry for shooting you! Even though, technically, it’s the game’s fault for making rules so that—“

Your fist connects with his cheekbone with a loud smack. The hat which had been so perfectly perched atop his head is knocked halfway across the room as Hatter’s head takes the impact of the punch.

“Fuck, okay, I deserved that,” he says, “What else am I supposed to be sorry for?”

“My wife,” you seethe, “you rat-bastard....”

“Of course, the wife! What was her name, again?” He flinches as you raise your hand once more, “I want to apologize properly! So you can hit me and really make it count!”

You study his face for a moment, admire the knuckle-shaped bruises blooming on his skin.

“It’s Aiko,” you spit, venom dripping from your teeth.

“Aiko? Aiko, Aiko, Aiko...” His face lights up, “Oh! Aiko! With the short hair! And the little heart-shaped earrings!”

“Those were an anniversary present.”

“You have great taste! In jewelry and in women!” He slowly raises his hand, index finger extended upwards as if to ask a question, “I didn’t fuck her, though.”

This time, you slap him.

“No, really!” Hatter hisses from the sting, “We made out, I felt her up a little, but I did not fuck her.”

“I saw you two at the club...”

“...And she was sitting on my lap and I had my hands on her tits, but that’s it, I promise,” he sighs, “Look, man, I always admit to fucking somebody’s wife. Or husband. Or whatever. But Aiko, she saw you and she started crying. And it was a total mood-killer—“

Desiring symmetry, you decide to backhand him.

“—But the point is that she left me to go back to you! We were super drunk and she was just using me to deal with the stress of the games! Trust me, I meant nothing to her!”

Hatter closes his eyes, bracing himself for the next hit. Something in you sours. You let go of his shirt and move so you’re sitting with your back against the counter. Tears begin prickling at your eyes.

You hear something shifting, a light groan and the crack of joints as Hatter moves to sit beside you. He puts a hesitant hand on your shoulder.

“We were all just trying to survive out there. Doesn’t make any of it right, but...well, that’s what makes us human, I guess.”

Bitter tears, hot and angry and heartbroken, spill down your cheeks.

God, what a nightmare. What an awful, terrible thing to have lived through. The blood. The death. The fear. Everything rushing through you, cracking your bones and drowning out your lungs.

It hurts. It hurts so goddamn much—

“Here.”

And Hatter’s offering you a beer—when had he gone and gotten that?—green bottle glistening and cold in his outstretched hand. He has another one pressed against the side of his face—no doubt trying to take away the ache your fist had pressed into his skin.

You dry your eyes on your shirtsleeve and take the bottle, nodding a ‘thank you.’ He sits back down on the floor, but this time, against the opposite wall—out of hitting range, you notice with a chuckle.

“How is she?” Hatter asks, “Your wife. Did she...come back?”

“About a week after I did. She’s...” you take a gulp of your drink, “...coping.”

“Aren’t we all?” He smirks, “Let’s just hope she doesn’t come and beat me up, too. I bet she’s got a mean right hook.”

And you laugh. He laughs, too. It’s ridiculous, sitting on the floor and drinking with the man you had been so determined to hurt.

Two beers later and you’re walking home, sunset warm on your back, phone dialing your wife’s number. You’ve decided to invite him to dinner this weekend—provided it’s alright with her, of course. It’ll be good for you all, you think.

Maybe you can all start to heal together.

#alice in borderland #danma takeru #hatter #boshiya #alice in borderland netflix #imawa no kuni no alice #spicy boy #I’m a grown ass woman I can prompt my own damn self #ngl I kinda wanna know what would happen after this like how’s this gonna go down???#listen I love hatter but also he seems like a very punchable person

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lordseochangbin · 5 years ago

Text

seo changbin x reader— enemies to lovers, diss track au! fluff & angst

a/n: ok there were some points where i felt iffy but i LOVE this idea and omg i love this sm im 🥺

in your seventeen years of living, you never enjoyed the number of comparisons your parents made between you and the boy next door.

he was just a few years older than you were, always mocking you for still being underaged and leaving you to spit out bullshit such as “im 18!! if you count the time i spent in my mother’s womb!”

it’s like he purposely did it to rile you up, but of course you got him back everytime. changbin being the most “popular music major” at school made him very much secretive and since you two knew each other from a young age, you were his weakness. you held his secrets, his past. that’s what made you powerful in this relationship stirred up from hate and jealously.

that, and your ability to compose amazing music.

it was another day at the school’s music studio. the professor understood you and changbin had some sort of misunderstanding so it was a priority that you two never shared a room, but mistakes happen i suppose.

you sat on the black leather chair, rocking it back and forth as you found yourself lost in your thoughts. “what should i write this song about...” you thought to yourself, chewing a pen cap between your lips.

you replayed the music over and over again. it was beautifully composed and you were quite impressed with yourself, however it didn’t hit the voices nor the raps of any music majors so you decided to call it a draft.

your cursor lingered towards the “draft” button before the door could burst open, revealing a boy in his usual black tee, sweats and shoes.

“get out” you said with a stern voice, eyes focused on the screen as you could already tell who it was

“geez... okay okay. what are you working on dumbass?” he said, resting his hands on the headrest of your seat as you stared at the screen

“it’s none of your business changbin” you remarked, clicking the draft button before the track could auto-play

you quickly rushed to pause the song before changbin could grab your wrists, staring at the blank page who’s title matched the title of the track

“some shitty music this is” he smirked, slamming the pause button so hard it made you jump in your seat

“try listening to your own music” you said, shoving him to the side and hiding your lyric book

changbin grabbed the desk behind him to regain balance, hurrying over to you as he grabbed the book in your hand

“what’s this? hmm? your love songs about me?” he smirked

your pretend-gagged in your mouth, grabbing the book from his hand and slapping his arm with it.

“stop bothering me you prick!”

“stop bothering me you prick!! mehhh” he mocked, his voice in a high pitched tone as winced his eyes at you.

everyday went like this. was he destined to annoy you? destined to be the only fault in your life with no mercy. he just enjoyed the way you scrunched your nose, the way you punched his stomach, the way you kicked his shin. god, he loved making you angry and he loved seeing you struggle.

changbin dodged your book this time before you could wack him, and assuming he was done with his daily business you went back to your seat. forgetting everything that happened seconds ago before a sudden reminder could be heard tingling down your ear

“you know y/n, why can’t you just like me?” he asked, his finger teasingly caressing the side of your cheek

“every girl wants me, yet you... i just don’t get you” he continued, pointing at you to show how much “you stood out”

you rolled your eyes, not having any of it at the moment. but you had to admit it, your heart was beating out of your chest and something in you was telling you to go for it. he’s right there, just one inch away from his lips and you could-

“exactly, take a hint seo changbin. i can’t, and i won’t ever like you” you spat in his face, forcing him to seperate his hands from your heated cheeks.

“alright, alright chill” he said in a somewhat teasing voice, “but you know you want to be mine. ill make sure of it”

“me? with your cocky ass? bet”

“it’s not like i want to be with you either y/n” he said, leaning against the desk as you looked at you for any reaction. you were as still as a statue however, and this didn’t go unnoticed by changbin. in fact, he was a bit worried when he didn’t hear a response from you.

you simply blinked, your eyes drawn to the floor as his words transcript itself into your head. he never wanted to be with you, he never wanted to be with you.

“hey, y/n you good?” he said, nudging your shoulder a bit

you woke up from your sudden day dream before turning back to your computer and ignoring his presence as you always did. but changbin wasn’t finished, he pressed the play button to your recent track.

“stop it, i can’t figure out the lyrics to this yet” you said. changbin raised an eyebrow at your plain stated response before he could smirk

“ill help you out with that”

changbin waits for the beat to replay, his eyes looking directly into yours as he twirls your chair so you’re looking at nothing more than the “rap god of music school spearb”. your breath increases as you are forced to look at him in his place, where he paced back and forth thinking of lyrics before he could spit something out.

your eyes watched as changbin took over each beat, his hands moving around to fit syllables with notes and his eyes deadlocked on you to make sure you took down every word. yes, it was offensive. yes, it was beyond talented. yes, did he so fucking hot as he brushed his fingers through his hair, his eyes now on the roof as he tried to think of lyrics to continue. but what hit you the hardest was when he pointed out how cold-hearted you were in the middle of your rap.

to be clear, he said “hey y/n youre cold hearted, like elsa farted. ‘let it go’ when you’re around me,your period hasn’t started” (A/N: I AM SO SORRY SKSK I WANTED TO HAVE FUN WITH THIS LMFAOO)

these lyrics made you laugh at first, but when you realized what he meant it remained drilled in your head. as the song went on his lyrics become more and more serious, more and more meaningful. you sat back in your seat, not even paying attention to what he was saying. you just watched him. his every moment. you eyed him from top to bottom as your heart beat started to pace a little faster.

changbin poured his heart out in this moment. he wanted to let you know of these mixed feelings he was having. i mean, geez y/n, why were you always such a bitch to him? for no fucking reason? that’s why he decided to ignore his own feelings and bully you for now on. you hated him anyways. but as the song went on, he was tired of rapping about your imperfections (that he tried so hard to make up). he wanted to confess his love in words you could understand, and now that he had your attention he focused on doing just that. only until the music could stop.

“y/n... y/n? you pressed the pause button”

you turned around to find your elbow on the space bar. “oh.. oh! my bad i’m... oh what am i saying” you muttered to yourself before turning to him.

“get out!!” you said, standing up to push him out the door.

“okay, okay” changbin put both hands up in surrender

you shut the door in a hurry, your back slamming against it as you clutched onto your shirt. there was a burning pain there, it felt like your chest was collapsing upon itself. you never felt like this before. was it the fact that he was rapping about you? was it the insults? did it offend you THAT much? you rolled your eyes, your back slowly sliding down until your body met the floor as you finally met a steady heartbeat.

“it’s cause i like you, fucking idiot. and you call me cold-hearted?” you said, thinking back on his lyrics.

“we’ll see about that”

————-

a smug expression fit your mood as you walked down the halls, each step pulling you closer to lordseochangbin music school’s courtyard. changbin and his “rap” friends typically hung out around there and girls crowded them in awe of their looks.

your dark eye circles drooped down low, you spent all night in distress. did he not like you? he liked you? his words hurt your petty heart, to say the least. you wanted to come up with excuses to answer this burning feeling. what was this feeling?

it came down to feeling confused, amazed, happy, heartbroken. they all seemed jumbled up and all you could think about was throwing it into words. all night you focused on your new diss track dedicated to the one and only seo changbin. you wanted to show him you weren’t just bitching around when you said you hated him. you meant it. in all honesty you loved him, and all he did was bully you around for it.

god, to call you a bitch like that? that hit different. you pushed through the mob of girls, standing confidently before changbin as he looked up from his laptop to see you.

“y/n...” he said, unconsciously handing his laptop to jisung to give you his attention. his hands rested on his knees before he could stand up, the crowd tensing around you

“god, here goes the typical y/n and changbin stand-off. power of the two rap lyrical writers” someone said behind you.

yes it was a typical scene, you and changbin causing scenes everywhere around campus. but this one felt different. this scene felt like it would leave a rough patch.

“changbin, just wanted to return what you gave me last night” the vagueness in your words threw everyone off, including changbin’s friends

“what? a good night lyrics to complete your song?” he smirked, taking a daring step towards you.

the close proximity made you stutter a bit before you could take out your laptop from your backpack and expose a rough draft, something you found on changbin’s drive

“wait.. isn’t that my draft music?” he asked, his eyes glaring at the screen before turning back to you

“exactly, now im gonna give you a piece of your own medicine”

--------------

you slinged your backpack over your shoulder and you walked away from the crowd. god, that was embarrassing. it was different to say the least, the crowd cheered you on but their support didn’t matter. what mattered the most was the way changbin’s eyes glared at you the whole time. he didn’t bother to make out the words you were saying but he knew exactly what you were doing.

one thing changbin couldn’t get himself to realize was your motive? why were you literally spitting bars at his face?

he stared blankly as you left thinking not only did you attack his height, his rap style, and his skills-- you attacked his heart.

---------------

the next day he never came around to your studio. to ensure you weren’t sharing this time you checked the schedule for the booked room everyday but you never found his name. you knew he was around because of the gossip about him and his new single with his mates, but you never saw him on campus.

when summertime came around you were excited to come home as well, hoping to see the same boy next door but you were more than heartbroken to find out the seo family had moved out. his absence was a daily reminder of the mistake you made. you should’ve confessed way sooner.

---------------

a year passed before changbin could find himself backstage, his palms sweaty from the nervousness that had been piling over him these past few days. it was a small debut, but he knew every one of his fans were anticipating this.

you, on the other hand, had no idea what was going down until a group of girls jumped ahead of you in the lunch line.

“hey y/n! you didn’t hear about 3racha’s debut? i guess changbin was debuting first after all” the girl giggled. your mouth dropped at the sudden statement.

“changbin.. he’s..he’s debuting?!”

“yeah! his stage is tonight!” the other girl replied, “do you wanna join? i have an extra ticket”

you grabbed the palm of the girl’s hands, giving it a squeeze in gratitude. “wow, thank you. thank you dude”

“you welcome” the two girls smiled before you could exchange numbers.

today was the special day, huh? you thought to yourself. it was the day he always teased you about, the typical “just wait till i’m famous, then you’ll like me!” he always bragged

you laughed like an idiot just thinking about it.

------------

later that day you decided to pass some time on twitter, searching changbin in the small text box in order to get any information on his debut. luckily, the tag was filled with posts and articles about 3racha. you learned a couple things from this which explained so much about the past year. his disappearance: he was transdered into a popular company called jyp, which was the same company he was debuting in. the company building was also 200 miles away, which may have explained why the seo family had moved. it seemed all too coincidental however, but only left one spot blank in your unfilled answer sheet. why did he never say goodbye? (a/n: bruh “never say goodbye” is the lyrics to the stray kids ost that changbin helped write... anyways continue)

you jumped into a taxi with the two girls, all bubbly and giggly as you chit-chatted inside the car. the girls ensured you wore an outfit that was a bit out of your comfort zone, a red-shimmery bodycon dress that hugged your waist tight. your figure shined the most in this outfit, and earned the top topic in your conversation with the girls as you talked about the usual “where and how” you got your outfit.

200 miles, it took about two hours you supposed at the steady speed the taxi-driver went in. once two hours passed you couldn’t help but to ditch the conversation, a pit in your stomach slowly building as you anticipated changbin’s presence. what if he forgot about you? you thought about the question for a bit before concluding it would be best if he did forget about you.

you entered the club, finding a table nearby the stage. as the three of you got seated you noticed a face peek out behind the curtains. if it wasn’t the look on his face, god that look on his face. you could see his shocked expression as he looked at you eye-to-eye. he never expected to see you here, in fact it was the last thing that crossed his mind but instead of making him more nervous your presence made him feel more at ease, more at home.

three performances went by in a breeze, the crowd cheering on at certain parts that impressed even you. the lyrics were fun, having you jumping in your seat as swaying back and forth to the songs. but before you knew it the solo stages came on, changbin’s was up first.

the second he got on the stage his eyes scanned the crowd before they landed on you once again. a smug smirk fitted his face as the song started, chan and jisung looking over at changbin for the message that inspired the song lyrics.

“this one’s dedicated to the girl that broke my heart. there’s more to the story of course, and now that i think about it.. i think i should probably change my words up a bit” he laughed, taking chan and jisung by surprise before they could find you in the crowd as well.

“this song... it’s to the girl i loved.. and i hated the most. thank you for being there for me, whether you wanted to or not. thank you for.. dealing with my bullshit. for being my motivation and inspiration. you mean so much more than you’ll ever know, this one’s to you”

------

three minutes later you found yourself crying in the bathroom corner. you couldn’t tell if it was tears of joy or sadness. small sniffles was all changbin heard in the tiny room before he could knock on the door

“y/n, can i come in?”

“you would still come in even if i said no” you replied in the midst of tears, trying to wipe some off with your hand

“you’re right” changbin replied as he allowed the door to open by itself. he ran to you in a heartbeat, getting you on your feet and wiping the small droplets on your cheeks

“now why is my babygirl crying right now?” he laughed, leaning down to lock eyes with you

“did you really have to address me as babygirl?! seriously, you pervert!” you slapped his chest as you continued crying “i’m only three years younger, THREE” you pointed three fingers out as he softly grabbed your wrists, pulling you closer

“ it was all i could think of in the moment, i’m sorry love”

“i mean if i was there to help you-”

“are we seriously going to argue right now” changbin interrupted, resting his forehead against yours. there it was. your heart doing that funky thing again. god your brain cells were just squirming in disgust.. this feeling of excitement, love, yuck! it was disgusting! you thought. but deep down, you really loved seo changbin. with every breath you could never take back the fact that you loved seo changbin.

“no...i just missed you so much” you mumbled, a stutter in the midst as you could feel changbin’s hot breath with the close proximity

“then will you shut up and let me kiss you now? please?” he whispered, his hands cupping your cheeks before you could nod in approval

“did you brush your te-”

“i said shut up” changbin said with a smile before your lips could meet with his. you immediately fell into his hands, yours wrapping around his broad shoulders as he picked you up by your waist. your thighs met the cold stone counter-top of the bathroom, changbin fitting in between your legs as you pulled him in for another kiss. changbin leaned back to meet your eyes again, “you know how long i’ve been waiting to do that?” he gasped, trying to catch his breath

“im sure you can write a song about it” you chuckled

changbin looked at the mirror behind you before turning around to find his bags on the floor. “actually....”

he leaned down to find his laptop inside. “i kinda already did?”

#i use commas way too much #changbin #seo changbin #stray kids #3racha #seo changbin x reader #seo changbin fluff #changbin fluff #seo changbin soft hours #changbin angst #seo changbin angst #bang chan #bang chan stray kids #han jisung #jisung stray kids

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zuzallove · 4 years ago

Text

Destiel and LGBTQ+ REP: a rant

When I was 18, fresh from graduation, my best friend sent me a text. It was clearly not meant for me, as he called me “love” several times, something he had never done in 16 years (we met when we were two: best friend doesn’t really cover it, it’s more like brother). I replied “???” and he said “sorry, it was meant for a (girl)friend of mine”. I found it weird, but didn’t push. Except a minute later I get another text. “It’s ok, X, I think she bought it.” Where X is the name of my other best friend.

A guy.

I didn’t know what to do. I had no idea beforehand, and I couldn’t really believe it. After a few minutes, the third text.

“Mind if X and I come over tonight? There’s something we’d like to tell you.”

OK. So they come over, we sit in the car (they’re in the front seats, I’m behind them). They make zero eye contact. They’re nervous.

Eventually, it’s me who has to say it.

“You love each other.”

They share a nervous glance.

“Yes, but in a way that…”

“You’re in love with each other.”

I was so afraid of saying the wrong thing, of being offensive, that I didn’t say much else. Years later, we’d laugh about how for a moment there they thought I had a problem with it, because I was so still, and silent.

I was casually homophobic back then, but the idea of being an ass to my best friends in the world had never even crossed my mind. When I say casual homophobe, I mean, I didn’t know any better. I had been raised in a catholic country with zero representation, zero family members who explained this stuff to me and all I knew about being gay was that they were effeminate, they fucked like rabbits and generally speaking it was always a good topic for a booming laugh.

They forced me out of that mentality. I began reading. Talking to them. Educating myself. I still remember my father shouting when I tentatively said that I was thinking about joining an LGBTQ+ association, screaming that “I wasn’t one of them”. My friends’ coming out was an eye-opener for me, as I slowly realised everything that sounds so natural, so obvious now.

I was able to grow and watch from an outsider’s perspective, and to this day, I honestly think I’m more involved in LGBTQ+ activism than they are, especially since they’re not out-out yet, ten years later.

From the outside, certain things hit me in a particular manner. I realised one day as I proposed a movie title (“It’s LGBTQ+ themed, you’ll love it”) that apart from sub-genres and niche fiction, there wasn’t a lot of it. And thus began my interest in LGBTQ+ representation in fiction, to the point that I’ve written Uni papers on it and that I became known in my Uni circle as the “gay girl”, despite the fact that I was straight.

Now, I’ve always had a deep and profound conviction: Destiel was an accident.

Take two actors with surprising, unpredictable chemistry, put in a few awesome one-liners, a dash of innuendo, a touch of double-entendre and voila. You have accidentally created an epic romance that makes most romance novels and tv shows blush in comparison.

Destiel – I think – was never supposed to be ‘a serious thing’. They played with it, they toyed with the possibility, because in truth, the phenomenon quickly got out of hand. They found it weird, unsettling, how much the fans were involved in this, and tried their best to squash it before it could take life.

It didn’t work. They pushed, and pushed, and pushed, and now this is the breaking point.

Because with Destiel, it’s not a matter of shipping: it’s a matter of being slapped in the face for believing two men could love each other in such a simple, pure manner. They called us crazy. Visionaries. Insane. Creepy. Obsessed. But at the same time, they couldn’t resist pushing a little bit more, because we were such good fans, buying DVDs, flying miles and miles to attend conventions, filling our houses with merch. “Just a tiny bit more,” they probably thought. “Let’s exploit the crazies. Throw in a line here, a line there, give them something to hang on to.”

And then 15x18. And then 15x19. And then 15x20.

They drew us back in, only to punch us in the face so swiftly that it took a moment to realise.

I was on a discord chat the night 15x20 aired. Since I’m a spoiler hungry bitch, I went into the Canadian chatroom, where they already knew what was going to happen. So, I had the dubious privilege of watching how – in the other chats – people went from perplexed, to disbelieving, to heartbroken as the episode progressed. I saw their hope being shattered. It’s still a memory that makes me shudder, especially as I was nursing my own grief at the time.

I’m fresh out of grief, now, though. I’m angry. I’m angry for my friends, who never get to see characters like them in a proper TV show or movie without it being labelled as “gay stuff”, I’m angry for that idealistic, slightly homophobic 18-year-old who still had hope things could change, and I’m angry that people still believe you can exploit LGBTQ+ people in an attempt to grab some cash. Not anymore. Not in 2020.

I don’t care what they claim, they knew this was going to happen, but they also believed it would blow over quickly. Let’s prove them wrong.

#destiel #deancas #casdean #lgbtq #lgbtqia #representation #supernatural spoilers #supernatural #misha collins #jensen ackles

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schrijverr · 4 years ago

Text

I Wrote My Own Deliverance

Chapter 10 out of 10

Alexander Hamilton is reborn as Alex Hambleton. He is desperate not to make the same mistakes twice, but it seems he is stuck in the narrative, unable to get out. Familiar faces pop up all around him as he attempts to keep his previous life a secret and write himself out of the story.

On AO3.

Ships: none

Warnings: none, but tell me if I missed anything or if you want me to tag something!!

~~~~~~~~~~~

“- Oh my god, you have been roommates with Aaron Burr for over a year!”

Alex winced. He’d hoped everyone had forgotten that detail, but it seemed not as the entire room exploded once more. With a last “What the shit, Alex,” from Laurens the room fell quiet to look at him expectantly.

He shrugged and said: “I made my peace with Burr, he’s pretty cool.”

And with that the whole room was send into disarray again.

“How!” John shrieked, “He murdered you!”

“Yeah and he had his reasons. I hate to inform you, but I was the one that said yes to the duel and insulted him the whole way through.” Alex shot back, “Besides, I thought we had just established that this time things can be different. If I can believe in Aaron, I can believe in myself. So far he’s been nothing but civil to me, he’s just another student wanting to live his life.”

It was quiet for a moment and Alex offered: “And Betsy already punched him, so even-Steven?”

“Only you, Alexander.” Eliza face palmed.

“I try.” he grinned.

“Wait,” Angelica said and Alex was scared of what she remembered, “You already knew at the party. Why did you come if you knew you would get punched?”

“First of, I didn’t want to assume and I only put the pieces together when the fist was already flying at my face. Second, I kinda did deserve that.” he told her.

“That’s not exactly healthy.” John pointed out, but he shut up after a look from Alex, the other had too much dirt on him and John was honestly the last who could talk about fighting as a coping mechanism.

Alex stuck his tongue out, as he turned and grabbed his phone: “Speaking of the party and Aaron, I probably need to find him before he does something stupid with his self-esteem issues and blame complex, like no offense, but our last meeting was not the most important thing ever.”

“You died.” Lafayette pointed out.

“Happens to the best of us,” Alex shrugged, “Case and point.”

“Ego much.” John grumbled and Alex just smiled as he called Aaron anonymously, the man probably wouldn’t pick up otherwise.

“Ah, yes, with me, Alex, your favourite and only roommate.”

“No, I’m not here to yell at you. I would have done that already if I wanted to.”

“Yeah, naturally, I never come back on my words.”

“They’re here yeah, already yelled at me and stuff.”

“I cannot with a 100% certainty promise that you will not get punched, but I am willing to try and convince them otherwise.”

He hung up and turned to the others: “Aaron is coming over, be nice.”

“Why would I be nice.” John pouted, arms crossed.

“Because, my dear Laurens, I have forgiven him and he could use some friends.” Alex explained.

“I’m with John here, I don’t want to be his friend.” Eliza mirrored John.

Alex smiled and said: “I know, Betsy, I know, but he hasn’t had it easy either. Even more of a nay-sayer and all around stick in the mud this time around. He has no one, you know how much it sucks to have no one.”

“Theodosia?” she asked, but Alex could tell her bleeding heart was giving in.

“Hasn’t come back, yet.” he smiled sadly at her.

“Alright, I won’t punch him then.” she threw her hands in the air.

They turned to John, who moped: “Whatever, but I’m not going to be nice.”

“Oh come on, man.” Herc said, “Making fun of Burr was always fun, it’ll be like the good old days when we were right and he told us to shut up.”

“You have a warped idea of fun, mon ami.” Laf told him.

“Like you weren’t there every single time to join in.” Herc shot back as they dissolved into squabbling.

Alex smiled and finally felt like he could take a breath. He had his friends around him again and no matter what the world threw at him, he could take it. He was home.

A knock at the door shook him out of his musings and he threw a look over his shoulder as he walked over to the door. Before he opened it, he warned: “Be nice.”

Aaron was indeed standing there and Alex greeted him cheerily: “Aaron Burr, sir.”

“Alexander” Aaron greeted with a wince.

“Come on, don’t be like that. If I had known you would become more boring, I would have never written another public document to fuck with you.” Alex grinned.

“Don’t antagonize him, Alex.” Eliza called out.

“Yeah, we all know how that turned out last time.” John huffed.

The comments didn’t really help, because Aaron winced as he started to back away, clearly on the brink of running.

“Guys, please try to be civil.” it earned Alex some disbelieving snorts, “Look at him, he’s about to cry. Are you gonna make Aaron Bartow cry?”

“Oh, it’s Aaron Bartow now?” John huffed.

“Yes. Yes, it is.” Alex said, “Just like you’re John Lawson and I’m Alex Hambleton. We’re not the same people anymore and I forgave Aaron a long time ago. He deserves people who know and understand as much as the next person.”

“You forgive me?” Aaron voice sounded so small and fragile that all retorts that might have been, died before they were spoken.

“I do.” Alex told him, “I saw your face, you know? When you shot. You were bracing for a bullet and when it didn’t come you looked so heartbroken and surprised. Van Ness had to drag you away. I don’t forget easily. I know I’m abrasive and a loud mouth that has an opinion on everything, who makes rash decisions, so I don’t blame you for wanting to protect yourself.”

Aaron looked at him wordlessly, unsure of what to say.

Alex grinned: “I’m aware you have a stick up your ass, but are you going to stare at my handsome face the entire day or am I going to get a hug.”

“You’re an asshole.” Aaron told him as he clutched the other tightly.

“I’ve been told.” Alex replied, merely holding on just as strong.

It took a while before either let go, but Alex was planning to hide for today and standing in the hallway with his door open was not ideal, especially as time went on and more people got the news, so he pried Aaron off him and led him inside.

He turned back to properly close the door when it was slammed open by none other than Tom, or Thomas Jefferson, he wasn’t sure who he had in front of him.

“You.” he pointed at Alex, whose eyes grew wide as he held up his hands, probably Jefferson he thought, “You motherfucker.”

Jefferson slammed down his hand and seethed: “This, really? You and your fucking pamphlets have to- Ugh! It’s always fucking you with your big ego and thousands of words that don’t even make sense most of the time and-”

“Hey, dude, calm down.” Alex cut him off, “What got you so mad?”

“This triggered my memories.” Jefferson admitted with venom, “Not the history lessons, not my face in buildings, not my legacy fucking me over or even that stupid musical. But you and your constant need for attention.”

“Ah,” Alex is quite unsure about what to say and one look at the others confirmed that neither did they, so he weakly offered, “At least you remember?”

“Like you think that’s a good thing, I read your stupid pamphlet, Lord knows I did, and it sucks, asshole.” Jefferson snarled, “We both know that.”

“It gets better when you find people.” Alex said, gesturing to the others, who waved awkwardly.

“Maybe, but I don’t really have anybody, now do I?” Jefferson told him and Alex would’ve never thought he’d see the day where he sympathized with Jefferson, though in front of him was Tom as well, not just Jefferson anymore.

“I thought we were kind of friends?” he replied, “I like debating with you and we agree more this time and, look, I know people we knew.”

Jefferson looked at him as if he had three heads as he slowly said: “You, Alexander Hamilton, you- you want to be friends? With me? Did you hit your head? Like is there something wrong with you and are you missing your memories? You hate me.”

“No, I hate Thomas Jefferson and if I recall correctly, your name is Tom Jamesson.” Alex replied, “And if you look closely, you’ll see Aaron Bartow sitting there. Besides, I think I can handle more debating in my life.”

“Only you would keep someone in your life to fight with them.” Tom said with a faked annoyance, “Though my name is actually Thomas Jamesson, so get your fact straight.”

“Well, then, Thomas, welcome to my humble abode, now please shut the door behind you before nosy strangers come in.” Alex said when Thomas’ reply wasn’t a blunt no.

Thomas snorted: “You published your life story again and you’re worried about nosy strangers.”

“It’s about the principle of the thing, I wanna do it all official, maybe hold a press conference, get a dinner thrown in my honor, make a long speech that everyone is forced to listen to. It’ll be great.” he grinned.

“The fact that I believe you is disturbing.” Angelica piped up.

And so they roped Thomas into the fray that was their little Revolution crew as they talked about their life now and their life back then. They compared notes on what was different and what was the same.

Apparently the Schuyler sisters were now childhood best friends and Angelicas memories had triggered those of the others. Eliza remarked: “Peggy was so sad she couldn't come to slap you into next week, but she has her internship.”

“Not looking forward to that.” Alex winced, “And I thought she liked me?”

“She does, she just likes fighting more.” Angelica commented humorously, “Being able to have opinions and do stuff, has really gotten her out of her 18th century shell.”

“Good for her.” Alex nodded.

“That’s what I said!” John exclaimed excitedly.

They moved on to Lafayette, who told them it was same old French noble blood and being send off to America for better education and to explore the world. He pouted over not being as close to Washington anymore, but brightened when he told them about the tea they drank together every other Wednesday.

John didn’t say anything about his father, besides the fact that he was a Senator and still a dick, or other family for that matter, but he was ecstatic that he would be able to become a Doctor this time around and he loved his study dearly.

Thomas didn’t really say much either. He was still struggling with connecting his two identities and what that meant for him. When asked about James, he sadly said: “If I saw him, we didn’t recognize each other.”

“Hey, we’ll find him if he’s out there.” Alex comforted him, then joked, “He probably remembered and tried to stay as far away from here as possible to avoid seeing me again.”

It got a small huff of amusement out of Thomas.

Alex looked at Aaron to ask about him, when his phone rang. Nervously he picked up: “Hello, yes, this is Alex Hambleton speaking.”

“Ah, you’ve read it then.”

“I understand.”

“Within the month?” Alex asked surprised, “Then I get to keep my scholarship? Thank you so much, sir!”

He turned to the others who were waiting expectantly as he grinned: “Looks like I’m getting registered and my plan for world domination is still on track.”

“I’ll drink to that.” Herc yelled, getting cheers from the others.

Alex smiled in the midst of his friends with a future bright and obtainable. A story ready for him to write how he saw fit, unbound by mistakes of the past.

He might be an old story in a new place, but there was always room for a rewrite. They were already on the second draft anyway.

#RR writing #Hamitlon AU #hamilton #hamilton the musical #alexander hamilton #Aaron Burr #thomas jefferson #angelica schuyler #eliza schuyler #john laurens #lafayette #marquis de lafayette #hercules mulligan #I Wrote My Own Deliverance #I Wrote My Own Deliverance Chpater 10

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gustafsnightangel · 4 years ago

Text

Shattered Lives Ch 18 Pt 2

“Thank you for the pick me up today.” He murmured as they snuggled together in bed that night. He was glad the day was done and she was cuddled in beside him. His beacon in the darkness, home. She rolled so she was looking down at him.

“Don’t go where I can’t follow love.” She said gently and kissed him with that sweetness that filled his heart.

“I won’t.” His eyes searched hers for understanding and found it along with pain, this was hurting her and he wished it didn’t. “I’m not.”

He kissed her gently. “Sleep love you’re so tired.” His fingers threaded into her hair and he kissed her softly, that lingering softness that calmed her.

“I’m going to miss you. I know it’s just overnight but I’ll miss you holding me.” She whispered, she was being clingy but she was miserable.

The past weeks with a brutal workload and no sex had been a blunt slap to the face. They were both busy, equally stressed, tired, and that tended to put a dampener on the whole sex side of things. She knew he was emotionally stressed, his own anxiety high, the self doubt had started to creep back in and that’s why she hadn’t pushed. She didn’t want to stress him out further or trigger the crushing anxiety and depression she could see starting to consume him. She couldn’t help wonder if she was no good for him. She knew he was dealing with his baggage, Ana and all her shit, but she felt useless. Did she still matter to him she wondered, did her comfort and support mean nothing? Don’t be an idiot she swore silently. That was her own insecurity showing and she hated it, hated feeling it, hated questioning his feelings for her when she was just beat to hell.

“I’ll miss you too love.” He kissed her. “Sleep.” He kissed her head breathing in that scent he’d miss so much.

She was worried about him as he woke super early to dress and leave for his flight. The last time he’d gone away feeling like this he’d almost hit rock bottom. Thankfully it would only be for tonight. It was shitty timing but it was life. He had his career, she had hers, this time their schedules just sucked, there was no other way to put it.

“I’ll be back in time for the twins game.” He murmured as he stood on her threshold. It had been a while since they’d stood there to say goodbye.

“It’s ok if you can’t love, they’ll understand you’re traveling.” She kissed him longingly.

“I should be back in plenty of time.” He stroked his fingers through her hair. “Besides I promised them, so I’ll be there.”

“Go now, sooner you go the sooner you’re back.” She smiled and his hand cupped her behind the neck and kissed her so her mind was suddenly fuzzy.

Say it now you fool. “I’ll call you when I land.” That wasn’t it. “When I’m about to fly home.” Nope, that’s not it either, chicken shit. He pushed the button for the elevator.

“Don’t shut me out love.” She murmured and kissed him, tears threatened but she held them in.

“I’m not, I promise I’m not.” He kissed her tenderly. He was though, he was hurting so much he’d shut her out to protect her, protect her from him. He’d protect her from what that bitch had made him at all costs.

“Be safe please.” She nodded as the elevator dinged.

“Always.” He said stepping into the elevator.

She watched the doors of the elevator close, stepped back inside and locked her front door. Leaning her head against it the tears started. Would he tell her or was that one big fucking lie too she wondered? Together, making it work, was it all bullshit to him? “And you need to just go back to bed.” She hissed. “You’re being stupid and needy and clingy and you need to knock that shit off.”

He hit his head against the elevator wall repeatedly on the way down as if it would knock some fucking sense into him. He was irritable in the car on the way to the airport and on the plane. Pulling the new notebook from his messenger bag and looked at the three photos of Sildie and wondered what she saw in him really. Closing it he put it away and pulled out the other notebook and started to write, all the reasons why she shouldn’t be with him. When they landed in Helsinki he’d successfully emptied his mind and indicated beside each reason what ones lead back to Ana. He was digging her out a word at a time.

She was making the boys school lunch when his text came through.

I’ve landed, miss you.

It was much shorter than she’d expected but knew he was busy so she let it go even though it stung. He was working now, it was time to knuckle down. She did it and he had to as well. Then why do I feel like I’ve lost him she thought? It was on her mind though as she drove the kids to school, dropped Lily at daycare, and parked for the day at the courthouse. He had completely shut her out and it hurt.

It hurt that he wouldn’t talk, wouldn’t open up. He knew he could be vulnerable with her yet he chose to keep it all closed up inside him. She could see it was destroying him, slowly eating him from the inside out. She’d deal with this when he got back. There was only so far he could push her away before the their relationship was no longer important enough to fight for. Is that what he wants she thought, does he want me to get so angry at him I’ll just walk away? Is he done with us? Was the anniversary week just too much for him? Are we too much for him?

Well if that’s what he’s thinking he was in for a rude awakening she thought, halting anymore toxic thoughts screaming through her head. She’d fight for him, for them. “He might let Ana win but I’m sure as shit not going to. That bitch has taken enough from him and she’s sure as fuck not taking him away from me.” She spat and parked the car. “And she doesn’t get to fuck with my kids.” She stood at the doors to the courtroom and took a few deep breaths, she couldn’t bring all that baggage in with her, she couldn’t implode right before work. Steadier she opened the huge wooden door and stepped inside.

With her day done she texted him the family photo from the day in the snow, the short video Brendan had taken of Lily hitting him with a snowball, him scooping up a larger snowball and hitting her with it. She stared at it wondering what had gone so wrong that day to put him where his mind was currently at. There was something about that day that had sent him into a steep tailspin.

With the kids in bed she hammered away at her reading and notes waiting for some sort of reply that never came. By the time she’d crawled into bed she wondered if they meant anything to him at all and knew that was bullshit. She was tired and stressed which made everything blow itself out of proportion.

He stared at the family photo she’d texted him, laughed at the video and smiled through tears. Why hadn’t he said it that day he wondered? It was perfect, the perfect day. Would he get another chance like that? Had Ana fucked up the best thing to ever come into his life? More to the point had he let her fuck it up?

His sleep was fitful with thoughts of Sildie leaving, nothing but his empty apartment to come home to, no kids, no Lily. He sat bolt upright and breathed shakily, the fear trying to rob him of oxygen.

“Nothing like a 2 am panic attack to really get you in the mood for the day.” He spat looking at the clock beside the bed as he flipped the light on forcing the air into his lungs. “Breathe idiot. Just fucking breathe.” His eyes would be hanging out his head by the time they went to the interview he was so tired.

He made a coffee and sat at the small table fishing out his notebook. May as well purge as I’m up and my minds already in that mode he thought. That was his one big fear he thought as he sat and sipped his coffee, Sildie not being in his life, no kids to come home to. What if she got tired of him, tired of all this Ana bullshit before he was finished dealing with it, purging it? He thought about calling her, had his thumb hovering over her number for a good thirty minutes before he decided to let her sleep, she was exhausted and stressed enough without his shit compounding it.

He wrote for a bit and then switched gears, closing the door on Ana before the interview was essential, self preservation. He finalized their weekend getaway and scheduled the painters to take care of Sildie’s office. He still had to clean that room out when he got home, not something he was looking forward to. By the time he was dressed and staring down a microphone he was already beat to shit mentally and emotionally. He just wanted to be on a plane home to Sildie and the kids.

She sat at the twins soccer game Friday night fuming. Not at the fact his flight was delayed, that was unavoidable, the boys would understand. No, she was fuming because she had to hear it from Daisy. Every text she’d sent him was answered with silence, no reply, no answer, nothing since he’d landed yesterday. Total fucking silence like she didn’t exist. To add to it her case had blown up in her face as well today and she’d have to spend the weekend saving it.

The twins were heartbroken. Liam with his two goals and a smile plastered on his face as he came off the field and over to them. She’d watched that smile falter when he didn’t see Gustaf. He’d promised them he’d be there, and he’d broken that promise. She’d recorded it but it wouldn’t be the same. It was like they were suddenly invisible and she was about done taking his silence as an answer.

She understood that shit happened, she understood that he was busy and still adjusting to their current living arrangements, but a text to say I’m fine but I can’t make the game wasn’t too much to ask. That was all he had to say. She wasn’t one to guilt trip, but a fucking answer was courtesy, especially when dealing with seven year olds. She got the kids home and showered while she ordered pizza and sat to read. Liam hadn’t stopped crying, Finn wasn’t much better and Brendan was pissed.

“Boys look at me a minute.” She said gently and eventually all eyes were on her. “I know he promised and I know you’re upset, but his flight was delayed and there’s really nothing he could have done to get here in time ok?” She knew this was going to blow up in her face when Gustaf came through the door. She’d tried calming them down since they got in the car but it would be what it would be.

Gustaf finally got the key into the door of her apartment, home at last he thought and he was beyond tired. Turning the key and opening it he walked in on a sight that was less than happy, he’d expected it with his delayed flight. Finn ran to him in tears and hugged him around the legs. He looked at Sildie then Liam.

“I HATE YOU.” Liam screamed and ran into his bedroom slamming the door so hard that Lily cried out sharply at the sudden noise and woke up. Sildie looked to the ceiling and sighed, the day just got better and better she thought sarcastically.

She saw Gustaf kneel down as she went to settle Lily. Let him handle it she thought, she’d had enough thrown at her tonight from three angry kids and her case blowing up in her face. Sure it was dumping it in his lap but she could only do so much on her own. Brendan poked his head out of his room and said a quick hello before heading to bed to read. Gustaf could tell the teen was furious.

“Finn what’s wrong?” He asked already knowing what as he dumped his messenger bag down on the floor and hugged the kid tightly.

“You promised you’d be there.” He sobbed. “You promised and you weren’t there.” He pushed Gustaf away as he sobbed, both hands against his chest barely moving him but the gesture wasn’t lost on him.

“I know I did. My flight was delayed and I wasn’t in the air until your game had started.” He kissed him on the top of the head. “I’m sorry Finn. I really am. Is that what Liams upset about too?” He asked gently and the kid nodded.

“He scored two goals.” He sniffed and looked at Gustaf. “And you weren’t there.” He said a little louder.

Fuck he swore internally as he breathed a careful sigh out, it figures the one day I’m not able to make it. That would explain why Brendan was pissed and Sildie looked as if she was about to peel his skin from his bones. He was so fucked, he was so utterly and completely fucked.

“I’ll come talk to him in a moment ok?” He reassured the kid. Finn stomped back to their bedroom closing the door loudly but not slamming it like his brother had and didn’t come back out. He wasn’t happy with Gustaf either.

Sildie came out a little while later once Lily had gone back to sleep and closed the hall door.

“I should talk to Liam.” He said softly to her. He just wanted to pull her into his arms and breathe her in.

“I’d leave it tonight. He’s beyond upset.” She said quietly, she was fuming on the inside and was determined to give him the benefit of the doubt and not explode at him like she wanted to do.

“I’m sorry Sildie.” He felt like shit.

“Nothing you could have done.” Her smile was slight. Except maybe talk to me about whatever’s eating you she thought, her temper was still simmering. “Except maybe called me, text me. I don’t know send a fucking smoke signal.” She snapped, her voice was quiet. No not quiet he thought, wounded, he’d hurt her, hurt the kids and now he felt like shit.

“It was a mad rush love. By the time we got through traffic and on the plane, then it was delayed and...”

“Daisy with you?” She asked, cutting him off. She really didn’t want to hear the bullshit excuses. “Because she had the time to text me after I’d texted you about six times with no answer.” She was angry, and she’d had enough of being kept at arms length with him.

“I’m trying Sildie.” He sighed and scrubbed a hand over his face. He couldn’t lose his cool with her or fall apart and he felt like doing both.

“No, you’re avoiding. You’ve shut me out. You’ve shut the kids out. If you can’t guarantee you’re going to be here, don’t promise that you can. Brendan understands, the twins aren’t old enough to really grasp the concept yet.” She snapped out.

“Sildie I’m sorry I...”

“Don’t, just don’t. Unless you’re going to tell me what’s eating you, what’s been eating at you for weeks now, I really can’t do this tonight.” She said and left it at that as she walked away to sort out her case notes ready to take to the office tomorrow, leaving him standing in the middle of the room. Her abrupt end to the conversation stunned him. He’d hurt her to the point of she couldn’t stand to be in the same room as him. He could see the pain ripple off her, the shield she’d put up between them as she tidied her work at the end of the table.

“I’m gonna go.” He said half in a daze. “I’ll sleep at my place tonight, let things calm down.” He choked on those words as they didn’t really want to be voiced. Although it killed him to say it he needed time, he couldn’t handle this right now either, he couldn’t hurt her or the kids any further.

“Oh.” It felt as if he’d physically punched her in the gut. “Ok sure.” She said softly trying to keep her emotions in check as her hand gripped the back of a dining chair so she wouldn’t collapse. She suddenly felt weak and lightheaded at the thought of him not sleeping next to her tonight. She hadn’t expected him to want to just leave.

“I’m sorry Sildie I need time.” He did, he was tearing them apart and it had to stop.

“I understand.” She did, it was too much for him, but she also had to brace herself that this was the end. She watched him walk to the door, grab his bag and quietly walk over her threshold and close it behind him. Gone she thought, he had just walked out, walked away from her and the kids and it cut her so deeply she had to sit as her legs went to jelly.

She felt sick, like legitimately puke her guts up sick. The thought of him not being beside her, not waking up to that beautiful soul she adored, the kids not seeing him in the morning. She let the tears come, let them fall, had she just broken up with him, were they over?

Admittedly she hadn’t made it easy on him. She was angry and hurt and basically told him she didn’t want to hear it. How much crap was she supposed to take in one evening anyway?

“Way to go idiot.” She mumbled and let the sobs come. Her gut roiled and she had to try and breathe to stop dinner redecorating her floor.

She cried herself to sleep that night in an empty bed. He had pushed her so far away she felt she may never be able to reach him now. She was worried he’d started using again, drinking again, had Ana finally got to him that much he’d lose his sobriety over it?

Gustaf woke to a pounding in his head. No, he thought opening his eyes and frowning, that was someone pounding on the door, his front door. He got up and slipped his sweats on while moving toward the door, opening it he was forced to look down.

“Liam?” He was puzzled. It was really early in the morning. “You ok? What’s happened?” He looked at her apartment door and didn’t see any lights on. Had something happened to Sildie? Did the kid sneak out? The sobs tore from him as he hugged Gustaf’s thigh tightly.

“Hey.” He soothed and sat down pulling the kid into his lap. “Hey, little man what’s wrong?” He asked gently. He wondered if Sildie knew he was out here, highly doubtful and when she found out he’d have one furious woman on his hands.

“I’m sorry I was angry at you and slammed the door and said that I hated you and woke Lily up. I don’t hate you.”

“It’s ok.” Gustaf soothed, he understood and held onto the kid.

“No it’s not. I want my dad.” He sobbed and held onto Gustaf tighter. “I want my dad but he’s dead.”

He wasn’t equipped for this he thought as he held the boy. Certainly not now he’d walked out on Sildie. He sent a silent curse to the heavens that he was in such a state mentally and emotionally he hadn’t picked up on the grief vibes with the kid.

“You’re the only dad I’ve got left.” His cry tore Gustaf apart. It was more than not being there at the game and he kicked himself, he should have seen it. Had you not been so in your head with Ana you would have seen it you moron, he thought bitterly.

“I’m so sorry.” He murmured softly to the boy. “I messed this up Liam and I’m sorry.” He held the kid and let him purge it.

“Ama?” Finn called and shook her awake. She snapped her eyes open at the terror in the kids voice her gut dropping like a stone.

“Finn you ok love?” She asked bleary eyes and trying to surface from the partial coma she’d fallen into. Dead to the world was an understatement.

“Liams gone.” He stuttered over the sobs.

“What do you mean gone? He’s probably on the toilet or something.”

“No he’s gone.” The kid cried. “The front door is open.”

“The fro...” She threw the covers off, and scrambled out of bed hastily pulling her robe on. She flipped the light on in the living room but she didn’t need it to see the door was wide open. She checked on Brendan and though about waking him but held off for the moment.

LIAM?” Sildie called and Gustaf heard the terrified panic in her voice and looked to the ceiling, this was not going to end well.

Storming to the front door she could faintly hear a kid crying and a soft voice soothing, and let out a shuddered breath of relief. She knew that voice. Looking at Gustaf’s apartment door she found him wedged in the doorway with Liam in his arms. His eyes met hers and she felt the grief well up inside her, she saw the pain in his. Liam was safe and she breathed the fear out, though she was about to strip the hide from his ass, both of their asses come to think of it. This was the last fucking straw.

She dropped to her knees in front of Finn and hugged him fiercely. “I want you to go back into your room and stay there for the moment ok?” She wiped his eyes. “Thank you for coming to get me I’ll be next door with Gustaf and Liam.” She kissed his brow and saw the slight nods between sobs.

“Can I crawl into bed with Brendan?” He asked softly.

“Of course, but give me a little time with Liam before you come out ok?” She kissed him again and watched him walk to Brendan’s room before standing.

Gustaf knew she was going to rage at him, he could see it on her face as she walked toward them. He’d take it even though it wasn’t his decision to sit with Liam at three in the morning on his threshold.

“Liam Michael O’Rourke get up, right now.” She snapped crisply. He could hear the barely contained fury.

“Go easy Sildie.” Gustaf said softly, watching her carefully. The woman was about to implode.

“No, easy is not how this goes Gustaf. Get up Liam.” Her anger was boiling, no he thought, not anger, pure undiluted fear at Liam not being in bed tucked in safely. The kid slowly climbed out of Gustaf’s lap and stood near Sildie with his head hung and still crying. Her heart broke to do this as he clearly needed Gustaf, but his behavior was unacceptable.

“Back home. Right now.” She said that low tone rippling off her, the lawyer in her the only thing keeping her in control. “Sit at the table I’ll deal with you in a moment.”

Gustaf watched as the kid went through the front door of her apartment and his heart plummeted.

“Sildie he came to me and beat on the door...”

She held up her hand and he stopped talking, it was the smarter thing to do at this point. She was beyond reason and no doubt scared out of her mind.

“I’m not angry at you for this, Liam snuck out and I’ll deal with that in a moment. Although had you decided to sleep in our bed instead of walking out he might have just curled up with you instead of sneaking out.” She snapped, he deserved every bit of her fury because he’d done exactly that.

“Go easy on him he just poured his heart out to me.” He said calmly, he wouldn’t provoke her fury, it would only end badly for both of them. He didn’t care if she raged at him, he deserved it but he’d shield the kid if he could.

She shook her head. “No. He doesn’t get easy when he just scared twenty years off my life. Gustaf I thought someone had broken in and taken him.” She was shaking now and he reached for her as he stood wanting nothing more than to curl her into him and soothe, give her comfort, beg her forgiveness at pushing her so far away it seemed like he’d never get her back. The half step she took as she backed away crushed him.

“You’re angry at me.” His heart broke, had he lost her?

“You know Gustaf, I’m not angry at you for missing the soccer game, shit happens your flight was delayed and there was nothing you could do to change that. What I’m angry at was I had to hear it from Daisy when I got no answer from you. I hadn’t heard a peep from you since you landed in Helsinki. What I’m angry at is you’ve shut me out completely, pushed me so far away these past weeks I don’t know how to reach you anymore.” She scrubbed her hand over her face. She was tired, stressed, and angry, never a good combination to have a rational conversation especially at three in the goddamn morning after her kid had scared her half way to an early grave she thought. “You know what, I’m going to stop there before I say something I can’t take back.” She put her hand up and stepped back further as the tears started to fall.

“Sildie.” He started and backed off with the furious look she gave him. He’d made everything fucking worse.

“Don’t. I’m beyond angry, I’m hurt, my case is in the toilet, and I just had the fright of my life being woken by Finn at three in the morning beyond hysterical telling me his brother was missing and the front door wide open.” She choked back the sob that wanted to come and they would when she was alone because apparently she was now. “I can’t do this with you on top of everything else.” She whispered and sucked in the emotions. She looked at him and saw the overwhelming pain looking back. She took a steadying breath before she opened her mouth again. She was angry with him but she still loved him.

“Come over for breakfast if you want to, for the kids at least, but right now I have to go deal with Liam.” She said stiffly, letting the lawyer take over so she wouldn’t completely lose it. The kids always came first.

“I’m at breakfast with my sister tomorrow.” He said softly not wanting to add fuel to the fire and hurt her anymore than he already had. “And I forgot to send that to you.” He sighed, furious at himself for just realizing he hadn’t updated the calendar they shared and wanted to just disappear. Everything he said right now hurt her and drove that hurt deeper, pushing her further and further away.

“Of course you did.” She muttered and without another word, she turned and left him standing there, she couldn’t look at him anymore, couldn’t take anymore tonight.

She walked through the front door, closed it quietly and turned to see Liam still crying, head hung low. He knew he’d done the wrong thing. She wouldn’t lose her shit at him but he’d terrified her.

She sat beside him and lifted his chin with her fingers so he’d look at her. “You have every right to be angry at him for breaking a promise, but you don’t get to scare me like that Liam, ever. Your brother was terrified something had happened to you, so was I. I thought someone had broken into the apartment and taken you.” Her breath caught. “I love you Liam and I thought I’d lost you for good.” Her voice cracked as all that emotion came flooding back. That fear, overwhelming, totally consuming fear.

“I’m sorry.” He crawled into her lap and sobbed holding onto her for dear life.

“I know love.” She kissed his hair and settled him. “You could have come to me, we could have gone to see Gustaf tomorrow.”

“I’m sorry. I just wanted my dad.” He sobbed and her heart broke. “But he’s dead.” So he went to the only other person that had been like a dad to him. Now she felt like shit after ripping into Gustaf just now, but the guy needed to know she wasn’t putting up with being shut out of a relationship that affected more than just the two of them. It impacted the kids too, and so did him walking out tonight.

“I understand love, but you can’t run off like that, ever.” She hugged him while he let it all out. She smiled as another pair of arms came around her.

“Sorry Finn.” Liam sniffed.

“Don’t scare me like that.” The kid said softly and hugged his brother tighter. “I can’t lose you.” He cried and Sildie felt that pang of grief spear through her soul for her brother, he’d left her too.

“Ok to bed now, both of you, sleep some more, and Liam?” She said softly and the kid looked up at her. “No video games for two weekends. Chores and homework will be done without question or fuss. I understand why you needed Gustaf and I’m ok for you to go to him but your actions were not ok. Next time you let me know where you’re going.”

“Yes Ama.” He said with no argument, the kid had some smarts. “I’m sorry.” He hugged her tightly.

“I’m sorry too love. I’m sorry your dad’s not here for you.” She kissed him and he looked at her and smiled.

“But Gustaf is.” He nodded and went to his room leaving Sildie wondering what on earth he’d said to Gustaf.

She sat at the table and let the tears fall. The overwhelming fear that she’d lost Liam ripped itself from her and Gustaf wasn’t here this time to pick up the pieces, to hold her. That was its own pain. Was this the end for them she wondered? What else could she do? She couldn’t force it out of him, he had to want to tell her, he had to want to trust her and let her in but every time she gave him an opening he shut her down and shut her out. All that was left for her now was to be angry at him and she didn’t want that either.

She felt arms around her shoulders and the sobs came harder. Brendan. He’d held her, just held her while the adrenaline of the morning cried it’s way out of her.

“You ok?” He asked as he sat at the table.

“No.” She shook her head and told him about what Liam had done.

“He was pretty upset.” The teen said gently.

“Yeah and it’s understandable, I get it but he can’t run off like that. Scared twenty years off my life.” She said softly. “It’ll be ok B. I need to get showered.”

“Have some tea first. I’ll make it.” He said and went to the kitchen. “Where’s Gustaf?”

“He went home for the night he had something come up.” Like a livid girlfriend who didn’t seem to mean anything to him anymore. Was that being mean, was she being too needy she wondered? “Alice will be over in a while to sit with you guys today.” And I’ll just dip into the “Lilys bedroom fund” to pay for it she thought bitterly. Gustaf was supposed to watch the kids this weekend while she worked but that didn’t seem to matter to him anymore either. She knew he had a life, had his own shit to do and respected that, but he’d left her high and dry with no communication about anything on their calendar even after she’d told him just before he left for Helsinki and he’d agreed. She had no idea where or what he was doing so she could organize the kids around that.

She sat with Brendan, watched the sun come up and sipped tea. Brendan sat in the one seat and read his book to Lily as she played, while Sildie took a shower and readied for the day. Alice would be over soon to care for the kids while she went to the office. Life went on and Gustaf didn’t seem to care one way or the other.

She knew he was battling some dark shit. But she was left hanging between work obligations and kids when he went home last night and breakfast with his sister this morning. “So much for we’ll make it work.” She muttered bitterly as she dressed. She was being pissy and she knew it and right at this moment she didn’t fucking care. She had to get through today and tomorrow at work, deal with kids that were hurting because of Gustaf, and face her own pain, he’d left. Quinn has left and now Gustaf, she was on her own, again.

Gustaf sat at his table stunned as he scratched away in his notebook as the tears flowed easily. He was an idiot and may have just lost the best thing to have ever happened to him. She was so angry with him and had every reason to be. He’d not texted her like normal, he’d shut her out, he’d shut the kids out, and worse he’d left, he’d walked out last night and left her. With those thoughts still heavy in his mind he showered and headed to see Eija.

It was around seven that night when he knocked on her door. He figured after last night he’d tread lightly after what she’d said and ask permission into her apartment. He wanted to... hell he didn’t know what the fuck he wanted anymore or what he was doing. She’d probably slam the door in his face for real this time.

His forehead furrowed when Alice answered the door and then looked to the heavens mentally kicking himself further. He’d forgotten he was watching the kids while she was at the office this weekend.

“Hi Alice, can you hang a moment while I get a change of clothes?” He asked and hoped she’d let him in and do some of what he’d promised.

“Sure.” She said smiling. “Sildie wasn’t sure what time you’d be back from work.”

“Thanks, not really with it today, long week.” He said and went to grab his messenger bag and clothes. She’d lied to Alice for him saying he was at work, and that made him feel like shit too.

The kids were at least happier to see him. Liam hugged him and they talked. Yes he had punishment but she’d gone easy on the kid even though she’d felt like locking him up and throwing away the key if her outburst was any indication.

Brendan was happy to see him but a little standoffish. He had a feeling the kid knew something was up. Lily came to him with a dad dad and it hit him how much he loved hearing that. He got the little lady to bed, got the twins settled and came out to Brendan sitting at the table with a pot of tea.

“When is Ama due home?” He asked sitting across from the teenager, he suddenly felt like shit for the past few weeks and what he’d dragged them into. Or more to the point what he’d dragged into their lives.

“Probably around ten.” He said softly. “The big case she’s working on blew up in her face yesterday they’re doing damage control or something like that.” He shrugged.

All Gustaf could do was nod. Because he hadn’t talked to her he didn’t know what was going on with her life. No wonder she was so stressed and angry last night, his shit had only exacerbated it. Fuck, he thought, he was so fucking fucked.

“Anyway I need to get to bed. I promised I wouldn’t swindle more time from Alice so I guess that means you as well.” He snorted and left Gustaf to his thoughts.

“Night B.”

“Night.”

He poured the tea and grabbed his messenger bag, his scripts were still tucked inside waiting for his attention. He’d work on things while he waited for her. He just hoped it didn’t make things worse.

It was well past midnight when she all but fell through the door exhausted. They had somewhat saved their case. She shut the door and flipped the lock and it was only then she noticed it was very quiet. Alice must have fallen asleep, not surprising she’d had them the entire day.

She turned and stopped dead at the sight of her lanky man at the table and felt her heart stutter, that choked sob at him being here hovering ready to leap out. She couldn’t go a round with him tonight she was beat to hell and her emotions were still too raw. She wanted to fucking rage at him but knew her fiery temper would only exacerbate things.

He felt the emotional flinch at him being here and wondered if he hadn’t lost her already. He stood and went to her the silence stretching between them unbearable.

“I can...” He choked and just said it. “I can leave if you want me to.” He didn’t want to go, he wanted to curl up with her, her warmth, her scent. He’d missed her. “I just wanted to sit with the kids like I’d promise you I’d do.” Even though he’d totally forgotten and fucked that up too.

“Right now Gustaf I want to shower and pass out, I’m exhausted. If you want to stay, stay. If not, I’ll understand.” It ripped holes in her heart to say it but he’d hurt her so much and she didn’t have the emotional energy to do this, to fight for him from whatever Ana had left in her wake.

She stepped past him and dumped her work on the table noticing his own stacked neatly at the end and almost lost it.

“Goodnight.” She said softly and went to her room almost in tears. She wanted to have him stay, curled against her. She longed for his warmth, his arms around her, his smell. The tears fell as she hung up her suit and ventured to the shower. The bed was still empty when she came out and she curled up alone, again. They were fooling themselves to think this could ever work, isn’t that what this had just proved? “How do I help him Quinn? Do I need to full on go nuclear and lose my shit at him before he gets the fucking point that I love him, I care about him? I want to help but I can’t if he won’t talk to me. I can’t when I’ve got to work to feed the kids. He left, he just fucking left.” Her sobs were quiet now into the pillow as sleep claimed her.

He itched to go and lay beside her but couldn’t. He’d done the one thing he’d promised her he wouldn’t do, he’d hurt her, he’d seen it clear as day in her eyes. He packed his messenger bag and went home quietly. He now had to figure out how he was going to fix their relationship, on top of everything else. Maybe some time apart was better, let it all calm down, had they been fooling themselves he wondered?

He dumped his bag and went to his gym, wrapped his hands, slipped them into the gloves, with two gentle taps to steady the bag he breathed out and slammed his fist against it.

She read the note he left on the teapot over and over again the next morning not really believing what she was reading.

I’m sorry Sildie. I’m no good for you like this. You deserve better, the kids deserve better. Maybe we were kidding ourselves.

Not only did it enrage her it made her gut sink. Was he giving up? She didn’t know what to do, there was too much going on with work, the kids, his current emotional state, her own current emotional state. She knew she was shutting him out now but she couldn’t function if she didn’t, it hurt to think about it. She left the kids with Alice and headed back to the office, work had become her sanctuary.

He was sitting with the kids when she got home at ten and left no sooner that she’d walked through the door. During the week he came over when the kids got up and home from school, yet went to his apartment at night barely a word between them. She’d left him to his soul searching. She’d asked him to tell her, almost pleaded with him to let her in but he wouldn’t. She couldn’t force him to talk to her and he’d shut her out so completely she wasn’t sure if he ever would.

She was at the office late Wednesday when Brendan called her in tears.

“Brendan, slow down love, take a breath. What’s happened?” Her stomach clenched.

“I’m at the rink and Gustaf’s not here. He’d promised to come and was going to drive me home, he said this morning he’d be here and he’s not. Ama what if something’s happened to him? If his car...” The boy was beyond it. “What if he’s had an accident and he’s...”

“Take a breath love. Take a breath. I’ll come get you ok? I’ll come get you and we’ll figure out what’s going on ok? It’ll be fine, he probably got caught up with work.” She said quickly. If he thought she was angry on Friday he was about to learn what fucking livid looked like up close and personal she thought as she hung up and called Gustaf. She tidied her desk, grabbed her keys, and headed out. There was no answer.

“What a fucking surprise.” She muttered as she drove. She was going to flay Gustaf alive.

#gustaf skarsgard #gustaf skarsgard fanfiction #shattered lives

11 notes · View notes

markcaramel · 5 years ago

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fuckboy P.1 [m/a/f]

fuckboy!mark being a pain in your ass and trying to get you to fuck him.

GENRE: Smut, light angst and fluff.

MEMBER: Mark Lee (and some other members but this fic is about Mark so)

WORDS: 1.4k

MATERIAL: Since this is only the first part, it’s a little suggestive.

WARNINGS: Mature content, do not interact with this account unless you’re above the age of 18.

*AUTHOR’S NOTE: This was originally a one-parter, but I decided to split it so the ideas won’t get messy or anything.

♡ Mark Lee. A troublemaker you’ve had to deal with since elementary school. Ever since you graduated to highschool. He’s just been a plain fuckboy. Always getting into random girls’ pants, then acting like it never happened. He’s always tried to fuck you, but you wouldn’t budge. Some blondies that hangout by your locker are super jealous of the way he looks at you when you pass by eachother in the hallway and always give you dirty looks for it and talk bad about you, but you couldn’t care less. No one in the school knew why you always reject him, not even your bestfriends. After all, you knew that if you fuck him once, you’ll just end up like all the heartbroken girls he once hit and quit then forgot. ♡

♡ You woke up by the unthrilling sound of your buzzing alarm, slapping it with your palm to get rid of the annoying noise. It was Monday, which wasn’t very thrilling either. You got up, and did your little morning arm stretch, cracking your bones in the process. You quickly got ready to go to school, kissed your mom on the cheek and left. While eating your sandwich on the sidewalk, you see Mark on the opposing sidewalk with a phone in his hands and a bag lazily hung on one shoulder (just like you), not paying attention to anyone walking infront of him. You giggled softly when he accidentally ran into a brunette teenager, but then rolled your eyes when he winked at her. Will he ever stop? No. Would he ever stop? Obviously no. The brunette dropped the eye contact acting all flustered and quickly made her way to wherever she was heading. ♡

♡ You then moved your gaze to the sidewalk concrete floor getting lost in your thoughts when you suddenly feel someone walking next to you. “Hey Y/N.” You heard a familiar voice speak. “What do you want Mark?” you sighed. “Good morning to you too.” He semi-mumbled. “Is it so wrong that I’m trying to have a conversation?” Saying it in the most dramatic way ever. “Go start a conversation with something else, maybe a wall for starters.” You said while smiling at his stupid overreactive reaction. “Sorry I’m trying to be nice.” He said in a high-pitched tone which made you giggle, sighing right after, but of course Mark’s dirty mind heard it in a dirty way. You suddenly saw a tent build up in his pants which surprised you a lot but also didn’t surprise you because come on, it’s M A R K. “MARK!” You kind of yelled while pushing him. “WhaAat?” He yelled back. You looked at his lower body then at his eyes, then he got it. “Ooohhh, Sorry I can’t control my genitals and how they feel!” He said sarcastically. “I can’t believe you, walk alone.” you said in a slight funny and surprised tone. “You really think I’m going away that fast? Heh, you expect too much.” He admit. It was true, I mean, this is Mark Lee we’re talking about. ♡

♡ As soon as you reached the door, a blondie came running to Mark. “Hey Mark! My parents are going on a vacation, and I’m gonna be home alone for a month! Unless you wanna come over..” she said while winking. You literally gagged internally and walked away searching for your friends. The sun’s blinding rays forced you to squint your eyes and raise your eyebrows in attempt to open them and search more clearly. You continue to look around wondering where they sat this time, until you feel a hand poking your shoulder, you could’ve sworn your heart was about to come out of your mouth. “Why the hell is everyone sneaking up on me today?” you whine while facing the person who poked your shoulder. “Oh hey, Johnny!” your face lighted up at the sight of your bestfriend. “Hey! So I really need to head to class but I just came to tell you that if Mark tells you to follow him during lunchtime, don’t. Just don’t. It’s better if I don’t tell you why so you don’t murder him.” He said while giving you a smile as a goodbye. You needed a moment to process his words because he was talking as fast as the speed of light. ♡

♡ 2 periods later, while preparing your art supplies for the next class, you were very confused about the thing Johnny told you earlier. What could Mark possibly want? You thought Johnny and Mark were luring you into a prank or trap or something. He can’t just suddenly pop out of nowhere and tell you this, it just seems sketchy to you. You were knocked out of your thinking by your friend telling you that class started 2 minutes ago while you were zoned out. You let out a short chuckle and walked over to your classroom, you were fairly nervous because right after this class was lunchtime, you made yourself a plan just incase they were trolling you. “Hey uh, can we sit somewhere else during lunchtime? Like under that big tree outside or something.” You persuaded your bestfriend. “Sure, but why?” she asked, puzzled. “Oh, I don’t know, I just wanted us to have fresh oxygen while eating instead of smelling ramen and chicken while I’m eating.” you tried to sound as honest as possible so she won’t catch on. “Alright then.” she said while giggling. Fast forward to lunchtime, you felt like exploding from the amount of nervousness you were feeling, it was literally nauseating. You made your way outside hoping not to bump in Mark or Johnny, or any of their friends. The thought made you shiver. You felt relief as soon as you walked through the school doors and continued to walk to the big ass tree on the field. You sat down and let out a sigh of joy. “Wow Y/N, this place might become our official lunchtime area.” your friend admitted. You giggled in response, opening your container of salad and lemon. ♡

♡ Mark walked into the lunchroom in a confident way for what he was about to do. “You really think your master plan would work?” Jaehyun asked. “Of course it will, Jaehyun, don’t be ridiculous.” Mark answered. “As if any plan you have ever made worked, genius.” Renjun scoffed. They all sat down in anticipation, waiting for you to walk in. “I’m gonna be right back.” Mark got up and speedily walked out of the lunchroom. “Where did he go? I thought he’s was gonna use his master plan on Y/N.” Johnny said, quite confused. “You think he backed down?” Yuta asked. “Come on, you know Mark, he’d never back down, no matter what especially when it comes to her.” Jaehyun said pointing at you through the window. “So that’s where she’s been this whole time and you haven’t said a word?” Renjun said, afraid of Mark’s reaction to Jaehyun’s nonsense. “Calm down, I literally just spotted her.” Jaehyun explained, defending himself. ♡

Mark came back into the lunchroom but didn’t make it pass the door. “Yuta come quickly!” He yelled loud enough for his friends to hear him. Yuta rushed off his chair and quickly followed Mark outside. “See Y/N?” Mark pointed at you, pausing for a moment to admire how the sunlight between the spaces of the leaves illuminated your pretty face. “I need you to go to her and tell her this-“ Mark cut himself off and whispered to Yuta the rest so no one would hear them. “Got it?” Mark asked, unsure if Yuta even heard anything. “Yes, yes I got it.” The boy said, very excited. Yuta walked over to you, hands in pockets. “Y/N, Mark says he really can’t understand this stupid Biology formula and he really needs your help at the library.” Yuta said. “Oh really?” you narrowed your eyes at him. “Well then, tell him to find some other person who’s willing to teach his stupid ass.” You replied, quite proud at your response. “But everyone he asked turned him down.” Yuta tried reasoning with you. “So did I.” You took another spoonful of your salad in hope of him leaving you alone. “It’s really important Y/N, Mr. Saltzman (tvd character lol) is giving him another chance of making his grades better!” Yuta said, very very desperately. “What do I get out of this?” you asked, giving up, knowing he won’t go away until you’ve agreed. “I have no clue, ask him.. and was that a yes??” Yuta bent over so you were face to face. “Fine.. I’ll do it.” You said, completely ignoring Johnny’s warning. ♡

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what-is-your-plan-today · 5 years ago

Text

CSI: Rogers and Barnes- The Serious Cereal Serial Killer Ch10: Surprise, Surprise

Part 1

Co written with @icanfeelastormbrewing

Episode Summary: It’s the day of their date, and Steve’s a little nervous… Episode Warnings: Bad Language words. SMUT in Part 2… (NSFW) NO UNDER 18s!!!!

Episode Pairings: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

Song for Episode: Hey There, Delilah by Plain White Ts

A/N: This is another LONG chapter guys, but we couldn’t not show you their date in full so…we’ve split it into 2 parts again so you can choose to read them one after the other or pace yourselves. Part 2 will be up straight after this one.

As always we live for re-blogs and comments

CSI Rogers and Barnes Master List // Main Masterlist

But girl tonight you look so pretty, yes you do. Times Square can’t shine as bright as you, I swear it’s true…

"Good morning. How you feel, Buck?" Steve asked Bucky, raising his eyes from the files he was reading at the breakfast bar. Bucky hadn’t been home the previous night when Steve had arrived back to the flat and there was still no sign of him when Steve had switched the TV off and headed for bed, and that had been way past midnight.

"Uh, not bad, for the end of the world." Buck answered rubbing his eyes.

"There's fresh coffee and I made toast if you want." Steve offered before taking a sip from his coffee mug.

Bucky only groaned as a response. He approached the sink and bent to search for something in the cabinet below.

"Slept well?" he asked Steve, his voice muffled due to his head being partly inside the cabinet.

"Yeah, like a baby. What are you doing?" Steve asked frowning.

"Bastard" Bucky muttered "Like a baby.." he said under his breath mimicking Steve's voice.

"What are you muttering? Are you hungover?" Steve inquired watching him dumbfounded as Bucky retrieved something and left it on the counter by the sink. What exactly, Steve couldn't see from his spot at the breakfast bar.

"Yes, I am." Bucky answered turning to face him.

"You went out on a Monday?" Steve raised his eyebrows.

"Yup. Bar crawl."

"I didn't know you were going out?" Steve asked, staring at him disapprovingly. Going out on a Monday and getting drunk was too much, even for Bucky, Steve thought to himself. Clearly the case was taking its toll on everyone in his team.

"I wasn't ... but then you drove me to it." Bucky answered pointing his finger at him.

"Me?" Steve asked shocked.

"Yeah..." Bucky cleared his throat before putting on a false panting voice ‘Come on, doll…come for me…’ Does that sound familiar?"

Steve choked on his drink and blushed fiercely. He opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. He was lost for words.

"You better wipe that desk down. You dirty bastard." Bucky groaned throwing the packet of disinfecting wipes that he had retrieved from under the sink at him. "In the station of all places" he continued as he grabbed a mug from the rack beside the sink and poured himself some coffee.

"It wasn't planned. We just..." Steve began to explain once he pulled himself together, still embarrassed and red-faced. Bucky shook his head before he smirked slightly at his friend’s floundering.

"Gotta admit, Stevie, I'm a little proud." Bucky said slapping his friend’s back and stealing a slice of toast from his plate.

"It just..." Steve trailed before he took a deep breath and shook his head "Actually, I'm not explaining to you. Fuck off."

Bucky roared with laughter as he sat in front of Steve at the breakfast bar.

"Making up for lost time, huh?" he asked mischievously.

"You've seen her? I'd bang her every second of the day if I could. She's gorgeous." Steve said grinning.

"Yeah. Marking your territory after a certain spiky haired technician was sniffing around?" Bucky asked and looked at the toast he had stolen from Steve "Argh. This shit is disgusting. Why don't you put some cheese spread or something on it?" he said standing up and heading for the fridge.

"What's with you and food? And are you going to tell me what time did you come back last night?" Steve asked him.

“Told ya, punk. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. And your toast is quite..." he paused and closed the fridge door. Bucky turned to look at his friend and grinned before finishing his sentence "....stark."

"You know what, Barnes? I'm done with you." Steve scoffed.

"Sorry." Bucky said still laughing. "Wait for me? Don't feel like driving today, my head is killing me."

He chugged the rest of this coffee and rinsed the mug before putting it in the dishwasher.

"Sorry, pal. Need to be in court in an hour. I'm not showing up at the station until afternoon today." Steve shrugged.

"Oh, yeah. Right. I forgot. You know my memory hasn't been the same since Siberia." Bucky said before grabbing a plum from the bowl and leaving the kitchen.

Fifteen minutes later, Bucky poked his head by the kitchen door to say goodbye to Steve who was still going over his notes and the files of the case he was supposed to be attending in court that morning.

"I'll look after your girl for you, punk" Bucky yelled before slamming the flat's door behind him with a snigger.

Bucky enjoyed bugging his best friend but he truly loved seeing him as happy as he had been the last few days. Though there was something about Steve that morning he couldn't quite place. He was especially nervous, he kept on twitching his right leg and he had been constantly drumming his fingers on the table. Something he used to do when he was restless about something. Maybe it was because he had to be in court.

That was what Bucky was thinking when he opened the main door to the building and, surprisingly, or not surprisingly maybe, Tony pushed past him into the foyer without much as a Hey for greeting. That meant bad news, Bucky thought and decided to send Steve a warning text message.

"Incoming".

******

Steve frowned as the door banged, and then he heard his phone go off. Assuming both were from Bucky and that he had left his keys behind or something he headed over to the door, and pulled it open. The smart ass quip he had about Bucky forgetting his head if it wasn’t screwed on died in his throat as he saw Tony looking at him.

“Tony…hi…”

“Rogers.” Tony spoke, pushing past him into the apartment.

Steve took a deep breath and then blew it out through his mouth harshly before he closed the door. He wasn’t completely surprised to see him, he’d been expecting some kind of confrontation after Katie had called him later the previous evening to say she’d come clean to Tony and his reaction had been as anticipated, basically he had hit the roof. With another deep sigh, steeling himself for the inevitable he followed Tony back into the apartment where he was stood by the back of the sofa, his dark, brown eyes roving over the Captain shrewdly.

“Let’s not bother with the pleasantries…” Tony looked at him, arms folded.

“Don’t start Tony…” Steve groaned, but he was cut off as Tony made an angry noise in his throat.

“Oh I’m gonna start all right…” he glared at him. “And you’re going to shut up and listen.”

Steve took a deep breath, and folded his arms, bristling slightly. He didn’t appreciate being spoken to like that, least of own in his own apartment but he knew if Katie and him were to stand any chance of having Tony’s approval, grudgingly or otherwise, he was going to have to take whatever the man was going to give him on the chin.

“Katie was heartbroken when Ward did the dirty on her…but I don’t need to tell you that, you were there. You always have been, you’ve been her best friend for as long as I care to remember and then…well, you did her wrong too, just as much as he did, maybe in a different way but you hurt her. Enough to make her want to move to DC and…” Tony took a deep breath and Steve waited for him to finish “So I gotta ask Cap, is this serious for you or you just after getting your dick wet again?”

“Of course it’s serious for me Tony…” Steve said, his temper flaring slightly at his crass tone. “And if you actually think that little of me that you had to even ask me that...”

“My God you really are full of yourself, Rogers!” Tony cut him off, shaking his head, and Steve raised his eyebrow at the fact that Tony Stark was calling him arrogant. “This has nothing to do with what I think of you, this is about my sister. The girl I couldn’t love any more if I tried. I’d die for Katie, you got that? Die for her!”

“Well that makes 2 of us!” Steve said loudly, silencing the other man. There was a moment where no sound was heard in the apartment bar the ticking of the clock and Tony raised his eyebrows slightly as Steve looked down at the floor taking a deep breath.

“Look, I know you’re not happy about this…” Steve sighed, looking at Tony again “And you’ve got every right to be angry and sceptical, I get that. Yes, I did her wrong, I’m not proud of myself, and if I could go back and change it all I would but I can’t. I love her Tony, and I don’t ever want to hurt her again. You have my word...”

He trailed off and watched as Tony’s eyes softened, but his jaw remained set.

“You better not, because if you do, Rogers, make no mistake I will fucking kill you…slowly and painfully”

Tony’s brown eyes flashed slightly as he stared at Steve, And Steve knew, absolutely 100% that he meant it. He was surprised to find himself slightly unnerved by the threat. Hoping that his face didn’t give him away he merely nodded and then Tony’s demeanour changed completely and he turned back into the Tony Stark that Steve knew, and had to admit, quite liked after all.

“Ok, good, this was a good talk…” Tony said, clapping Steve on the shoulder.

Steve smiled as the weight he hadn’t even realised he’d been carrying was lifted off his shoulder. Having Tony’s, albeit grudging, approval would mean the world to Katie, and if he was honest, it meant a lot to him as well. Not only was Tony his friend also, but he was now the closest thing Katie had to a father, and he wanted him to be alright with the fact the two of them were together. Plus it meant there was no sneaking around outside work as well as inside, which was going to make things for them a lot easier.

He offered the man a coffee which he politely declined, stating he needed to get back to the office. The two shook hands on the threshold of Steve’s door before Tony gave him one last look, raising his index finger and middle finger of his right hand to his eyes, before turning them to point at Steve in an “I’m watching you” gesture. Steve raised his eyebrows in understanding and felt his mouth tug upwards at the side as Tony turned on his heels and left.

He retreated back to his living room and pulled out his phone. He’d been right about one thing, the message had been from Bucky. It was a single word- “Incoming…”

With a snort he typed out his response- “Incoming already came in…” before he hit send and then called Katie “Hey baby” Katie greeted and Steve smiled.

“Morning honey, guess who I’ve just had a visit from.” Katie groaned into the phone as Steve walked into his bedroom, opening his closet.

“Let me guess… my darling brother turned up to give you the shovel talk?” her tone was exasperated. “No mention of a shovel, just threatened to kill me slowly and painfully if I hurt you, and you know what? I have absolutely no qualms about the fact he would.” Steve grinned as he spoke, pulling out a crisp white shirt.

“Don’t tell me you’re actually scared of him?” she questioned playfully. “Well he seemed pretty convincing.” Steve said, dropping his suit pants onto the bed next to his shirt as Katie let out a chuckle.

“Best make sure you don’t hurt me then aint ya?” “I’ve no intentions of doing doll.” He said, honestly before he let out a breath, smiling “I can’t wait for tonight.”

“Me neither.” she replied, and he could hear the smile in her voice a she spoke.

“Ok, well, I need to get ready for court…” he sighed, pulling out a blue and silver striped tie “But I’ll see you at the Station after lunch ok?”

“Yeah, you will. Love you.” “You too sweetheart.”

He cut the call and dropped the phone onto the bed, taking a deep breath before he turned and headed for a shower

*****

“Thanks…” Katie looked at Bucky as he placed the large Vanilla Latte on her desk. She lounged back in her chair, watching him as he dropped into his seat with a groan and banged his head on the desk. She frowned “You alright Buckaroo?” “Never better Doll face.” he said, dodging the pen she threw at him at the use of the name. “Just drank too much last night”

“On a Monday?” Katie smirked “Good going…” “Yeah, well it wasn’t planned.” Bucky said, his eyes darting to Steve’s office which was locked. He turned back to Katie and arched his eyebrows “You know closing the blinds to a room doesn’t make them soundproof?”

Katie’s eyes widened as she understood instantly what he was getting at and she let out a groan which turned into an embarrassed chuckle “You heard us? We didn’t think there was anyone here.” “Clearly.” he said, sardonically “I had to come back for my phone. You weren’t exactly being discreet…”

She blushed, and then her embarrassed expression was replaced by a wicked glint as she looked at Bucky and shrugged “Those glasses he has do things to me.” Bucky snorted and shook his head “You’re a nightmare.” Katie grinned, shrugging.

“Hey Serge…both of you..” Clint’s voice rang across the room and Bucky looked up as he put the phone down, walking over to their desk. “I’m having some real trouble with this whole Rumlow thing…”

“How so?” Katie asked.

“Well, I’ve been passed from department to department.” he frowned “And no one seems to be able to give me a straight answer…one of them told me there was no record of any prisoner with that name ever having been in the prison in the first place.” Katie frowned “Well that’s just nonsense…” she looked at Clint then Bucky before she shook her head

“There must be some kind of mistake.” Bucky shrugged “An error in their system.” “Or some kind of cover up.” Katie mused, biting her lip.

“A cover up?” Clint looked at her “That’s a little…” “Far fetched?” Katie snorted “So was the idea of Ross fucking a goat but…”

“You had to bring that up…” Bucky groaned.

“Just…hear me out.” Katie dropped her voice “You know what I think about the blackmail thing. I seriously believe someone’s been yanking Ross’ chain…and if it’s to do with Rumlow, as we suspect, than Ross was high enough up in the Senate to be able to pull something like this off…”

“That’s some heavy duty conjecture.” Bucky dropped his voice “Why would anyone want to blackmail Ross into erasing the fact that Rumlow was in jail?”

Katie shrugged “No idea…but the way this case is going I’m not ruling anything out.”

Clint looked at Katie then Bucky “So what do you want me to do?” “Can you pull details of every call you made, to who, what they told you…” Katie looked at him “Then we can get all of it in order and take it to Steve. If we’re about to blow some kind of government cover up, he’s gonna need to speak to Fury…” “Will do.” Clint said, straightening up “Where is Cap anyway?” “In Court…” Wanda pipped up before Bucky or Katie could answer as she walked past with a bunch of files in her arms “Should be back after lunch.” Katie rolled her eyes at Bucky who grinned at her slightly over his coffee. “Can you check his diary Wanda?” he looked at the other woman “See what he has on this afternoon…” “I know what he has on.” she said, smirking slightly “A suit, like he always does in court…” Katie bristled slightly and Bucky groaned inwardly as Wanda continued “And boy does he look good in them…” “Well, that aside can you check his dairy?” Bucky said to her, not harshly but sternly enough to tell the woman to do it “We need an hour or so…make sure you schedule it in please?”

Wanda merely nodded and walked over to her desk, and as soon as she was out of earshot Bucky leaned forward as Katie started to grumble.

“I swear to God one of these days…”

“She can look at him in those suits all she wants…” he grinned “You’re the one that gets to take it off him tonight.”

Katie gave a snort before she shook her head “I doubt he’s gonna wear a suit on our date.” “Your date?” Bucky frowned, “That’s tonight?” Katie nodded and Bucky then understood what Steve had been nervous about that morning. It wasn’t court, it was his date. Stupid blonde punk was nervous about taking his girl on a date. It was kind of ironic really, they’d seen each other naked, fucked…yet he was nervous about a date.

But that was Stevie all over.

“Do you know where you’re going?”

“Nope.” she shook her head “He won’t tell me. Do you know?” “No.” Bucky said honestly “But even if I did, I wouldn’t tell you. He’d kick my ass.” Katie rolled her eyes before she glanced over at Clint who was taping at his keyboard, and then a wicked smile spread across her face. Bucky watched as she stood up.

“You got all the records of the phone calls?” “Yeah, why.” “Give them to Wanda.” she said loud enough so that Wanda’s head jerked up “Wanda, I need you to pull these notes into order and file them so Clint can go through and cross reference anything important.” “Me?” Wanda looked at her

“Yes, that is your job isn’t it?”

“I’m not doing that.” “Well, as your Sergeant, I’m telling you that you are.” Katie folded her arms and looked at him. “By this afternoon.” Bucky hastily looked down, trying to stop himself from laughing. This was Stark all over…wait until the moment was right, and then strike back.

“Whatever you say, Serge…” Wanda glared back at Katie before she tore her eyes away and looked at Clint “Give me what you have and I’ll sort it.” Katie returned to her desk and locked eyes with Bucky who simply raised an eyebrow at her. She shrugged innocently before she pulled her file over and began flicking through.

***** With a sigh Steve walked out of court, hastily loosening his tie and undoing the top button on his shirt. His questioning had been fairly straight forward, but still he hated this part of the job. Mind you, he could relax about it now, it was done and unless he was mistaken the perp was going down for a long time.

He turned his phone back on and it beeped at him to indicate he had a message, it was from his Ma asking him what time she should expect him for lunch. He was about to call her when the screen lit up. It was Katie.

“Hey doll.” he greeted her as he walked over to the Audi A5 the insurance company had given him as a temporary means of transport whilst they wrangled over a settlement for his.

“Hey, listen, Thor just called, he’s heading past the diner and grabbing everyone lunch. Do you want anything?” “No, I’m gonna head and see Ma.” he said, unlocking the car. “She asked me over for dinner tonight and, as I’m otherwise engaged I said I’d go and see her for lunch instead.”

Katie chuckled slightly “Ok, how was court?” “Same as usual.” he said, climbing into the car “Done now so…” “Ok, well, I’ll see you soon.” “You in the office?” “Yeah.” she replied.

“Ears?” “Everywhere.” Steve smirked to himself “Love you.” “Back at ya.” she said before she cut the call.

It didn’t’ take him long to navigate the lunchtime traffic to his Ma’s place. He locked the car and headed up the steps on the stoop, unlocking the door into the tiled hallway.

“Ma?” he called and she appeared in the kitchen door.

“Hey son.” she smiled as he bent to kiss her cheek. “You look smart.”

“Court,” he replied as means of explanation. “Something smells good?”

“It’s just chicken Caesar salad.” she said, watching as Steve undid the cuffs on his shirt and rolled the sleeves up to his elbows. “You look just like your father when you do that.” she said fondly.

Steve smiled at her and then, as she waved away his offer of help he pulled a jug of water from the fridge, setting it on the table before the two of them sat down to eat.

“I’m sorry I didn’t get over this weekend.” Steve looked at his ma “It was kind of hectic…”

Hectic as in he had spent most of it with Katie either in bed or slobbing on the couch as they ran Bucky through her ridiculous list of ex Boston, Africa or Hong Kong based boyfriends...

“Oh don’t be silly.” Sarah waved away his apologies, her Irish lilt taking on an amused tone “You’re a grown ass man now Steven, you don’t need to be visiting your ma every Sunday.” “No, I know but I like to.” he shrugged. Sarah merely smiled before she took a bit of her food.

“So, what are you doing tonight then?”

“I err…” Steve hesitated for a moment, debating brushing the question off, but he knew it wouldn’t work. His mother could always tell when he was lying. Actually, most people could, because he was shit at it. “I have a date.” he finished, a little shyly.

Sarah choked on her food slightly as she looked at him “A date? You?” Steve rolled his eyes “Is it really that hard to believe?” “I don’t mean it like that…” “Well it kinda sounds like that’s what you mean…” “No, no… I’m just…well, I’m surprised that’s all.” Sarah said, looking at him.

“You don’t look surprised.” Steve raised his eyebrow “You look disappointed.”

Sarah took a deep breath and sighed “Ok, well, maybe I was kinda hoping that you and…” she trailed off and shook her head, “actually, it doesn’t matter. I��m pleased you’re getting out there again, after Peggy.” Steve knew full well what she had been about to say and he couldn’t stop the grin spreading across his face as his Ma looked at him.

“You’ll like her Ma.” he said “She’s amazing. Bit sassy at times but, she likes apple pie…” Sarah looked at her son, frowning for a second before her eyes grew wide “No, you’re…” Steve grinned again as Sarah’s hand flew to her mouth “Star…you mean…” He nodded. “Yeah, we…we’re gonna give it a go. A proper one this time.” “Oh Steve…” she said with a slight splutter, her eyes misting up “Son, I’m…” “Ma…” he sighed, as she wiped her eyes “Come on…”

“I’m just…”she took a deep breath “Well I know how long you’ve waited for this laddy, you’ve been in love with that girl for 10 years now.” Steve flushed slightly and looked down at his plate of food. “Took me a while to realise it though huh?” “Well sometimes you have to take the long way round to reach your destination.” Sarah said wisely, squeezing Steve’s hand “Just makes it all the more sweet when you finally arrive.”

**** "V" Bucky exclaimed.

"It's not your turn!” Wanda protested, pouting "It's Clint's. Clint, go."

"V" Clint shrugged.

"Ok. There's one V." Wanda sighed and turned to write a letter V on one of the slots.

It was lunch time and they had decided to relax and have a nice time while they waited for Thor to come back with their food. Clint had suggested moving to the briefing room for lunch so that they could use the whiteboard there to play Hangman. He and Bucky had hoped a bit of bonding time with the team would put a stop at the bickering between Wanda and Katie for a while. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Would Steve have been there, they wouldn't have dreamt of going in there for lunch. But you know what they say, while the cat is away, the mice will play.

"Greetings morons!" Thor announced his presence as he appeared in the doorway "I've come bearing gifts" he added as he lifted both his hands showing the team the plastic bags which contained their subs and drinks. Everyone moved to get their food and the blonde haired officer’s eyes flicked around the room and a grin spread across his face.

"Were you playing hangman?" he asked, observing the whiteboard carefully, as his team mates ravaged the plastic bags.

"Yes" Katie said before she began to unwrap her sandwich.

“Huh…” he said, pulling his own food out of the bag. Bucky watched Thor as he looked at the letters on the board, and snorted. None of them had a clue what Wanda had written, there was no chance Bungalow was going to get it. Bucky took a bit of his sub and turned towards Katie and Natasha who were, in between bites, now discussing something they’d both seen on TV the night before, when Thor’s booming voice cut across the room.

"Is that Sokovia?" he asked, still looking at the whiteboard.

Everyone stopped eating and turned their attention to where he was sat in the far left of the room. Wanda drew a frustrated breath as Natasha spoke.

"What do you mean?"

"The word. On the whiteboard?" Thor explained himself.

"Yes." Wanda admitted, clearly a bit pissed at Thor blowing up her mysterious word. Bucky was pretty sure she had been confident no one would guess it, which meant she would win and would get her work done by whichever member of the team she picked for an entire workday.

"How do you even...?" Katie looked at Thor, an amused grin on her face.

"Yeah. And who the hell is Sokovia?" Bucky asked not trusting him.

"Where to start? Umm..." Thor began, throwing the foil from the sandwich he had already eaten to the bin by the whiteboard "Sokovia is not a person. It is a landlocked country in South-West Europe. It has had a rough history." He stopped and saw everyone was looking at him, all utterly confused and perplexed but decided to continue anyway "It's nowhere special, but it's on the way to everywhere special."

Clint and Natasha looked at one another and then at Wanda who shrugged and said "He's right."

"So..." Bucky began to say "I guess Thor has won the game."

"Yup." Katie grinned at Thor. Bucky knew she was relieved Wanda hadn't won. Everyone in the room knew who would be biting the dust if she had.

"I'd like a Bloody Mary." Thor chuckled and Katie let out a loud laugh.

"Wait there, buddy." Clint spoke "You weren't even playing so you didn't win shit."

"He's right." Natasha quipped.

“No he isn’t…” Katie began to protest, but Clint cut her off.

"I am totally right Stark. And I was the last to guess a letter so it's my turn." Clint stated standing up from his chair.

"Who says that?" Bucky asked munching his lunch.

"I didn't make the rules, Buck Buck. So keep eating and watch the professionals do their thing. All-righty, let's spice this shit up." the detective said grabbing the eraser and cleaning the whiteboard as he spoke.

"Ok. This is the last one." Wanda said "Steve will be here any minute."

Katie glared at her as the red haired woman checked the time on her wristwatch with a smile plastered on her face.

"You can't wait, can you? Bitch." Katie muttered and Bucky shot her a shut up and relax look. She sighed and folded her arms, slumping back in the chair.

"Ok. Ready?" Clint asked once he had finished drawing the lines for the letters of the word "Let the Hunger Games begin! Whosever be worthy shall haveth the power!" Clint said in a deep voice wielding the whiteboard marker.

“That’s not…that’s not the Hunger Games...” Natasha looked at him and Clint shrugged.

"Can I start?" Bucky asked.

"Please be my guest." Clint replied

"N" Bucky quipped.

"Three Ns for the gentleman!" Clint said ceremoniously as he wrote the letters. "Who's next?"

"S" Wanda said.

"Ok. There's one S, young lady. Next?"

"G" Katie and Natasha spoke at the same time, exchanging a smirk

"Oh, this is gonna be beautiful." Katie added smiling.

Bucky saw Natasha and Katie look at each other mischievously as Clint wrote the letter G in its slot.

"Thor you're next." Clint informed the man who stared at the whiteboard for a couple of seconds before asking

"Really, Barton? Cunnilingus?" Thor arched an eyebrow.

"Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner ladies and gentlemen!" Clint yelled laughing.

"Hey. That's a made up word." Bucky protested

"All words are made up." Thor offered with a smug smile.

"I mean, it isn't a thing." Bucky explained himself.

"Maybe you don't need to do it. But it is a thing." Katie told Bucky nudging him.

Bucky glanced at her as she winked at him, still none the wiser but then the joking nature around the room was shattered.

"Stark would know, she gets a lot, apparently." Wanda said, examining her fingernails.

"What the fuck did you just say?" Katie growled, beginning to stand up. But Bucky was fast and grabbed her by her arm as Wanda merely turned to her, shrugging. Natasha hastily began to divert the conversation, giving Bucky chance to calm the Sergeant next to him.

“One more wise crack, so help me God…”

"For fuck's sake, leave it. You got the man." Bucky hissed only for Katie to hear.

"He isn't a fucking prize to be won, Bucky." Katie hissed back, rather hotly.

"Well, would you just relax?" Bucky tried to appease her.

Katie sighed and her lips clamped together. She looked down at the table and Bucky saw she was fiddling with her fingers under the table.

"It's just.... I've waited so long for this and I dunno... She's coming along now and..." Katie trailed.

"I know, doll face." Bucky said rubbing her thigh "Just try to keep it cool, ok?"

Bucky saw Katie nod in agreement and both turned to look at their team mates who were now immersed in a discussion about a word in Latin not being allowed in the game.

"Cunnilingus is not just a word. It's a right." Natasha spoke up winking and Bucky heard Katie snort and was pleased to see the cheeky grin was back on her face.

"Well, hello sister." Katie said and high-fived Natasha.

The two of them began to snigger, but as Bucky watched Wanda’s entire body language changed and she jumped up off her chair, tucking her hair behind her ears.

"Oh, hi!" she said, eyes gazing towards the door, huge smile on her face..

Bucky turned around to see Steve dressed in his suit, no tie, leaning on the briefing room doorframe.

"What's going on?" he asked and then his eyes fell on the whiteboard and his face contorted as he read the word written on it. "For fuck's sake. Everybody get back to work. Now!" he hollered.

Wanda pretty much scrambled after him whilst everyone stood up immediately, Natasha, Clint and Thor sharing a look. Katie’s eyes were fixed on Wanda as she moved past Steve, smiling at him. Steve nodded in response and then turned his head to look at his girl as everyone else walked out of the briefing room. She was last to leave, and he saw her gaze flick up and down his body for a second before her eyes locked onto his. She followed behind Bucky and just as she was about to walk past him she whispered "Relax, Captain."

With a sigh Steve watched his team heading down the corridor, more or less in silence well aware he had probably just ruined any feel-good factor they’d built. Striding after them he headed into his office, closing the door behind him. He shrugged off his jacket and draped it over the back of his chair before he sank down into the black leather seat rubbing at his eyes. He’d just turned on his laptop when he heard a knock on the door. Lifting his eyes, he saw Bucky poking his head through a gap in the door.

"Can I come in, or you gonna rip my head off?" Bucky asked

"Of course you can, Buck." Steve sighed.

"You need to chill your beans, punk. It was lunchtime. Everyone has been stressed..." Bucky said sitting on the chair in front of Steve's desk. “No harm done…”

"I know... " Steve trailed as he rubbed his temples “Anyway, we made any progress?” Bucky quickly filled him in on Katie’s latest theory and that they were working it. Steve felt a small smile creep across his face, his girl was fucking clever.

“So…” Bucky eyed him “You gonna tell me what that whole Captain Ass-hat display was about? And don’t tell me you’re just tired because we both know you, and I quote ‘slept like a baby’ last night…” Steve hesitated a little before he signed, knowing full well there was no point in lying.

"I'm nervous, Buck."

"I knew it…about the date, right?" Bucky smiled fondly at his friend who looked at him frowning. "Katie told me earlier." he explained and Steve smiled back.

“Yeah, and I know it’s ridiculous, I mean after everything we’ve already…you know, and…” “Look, just relax and have a good time.” Bucky shrugged. “Make sure she's spoilt, Steve. She deserves it"

"Why do you say that? Is everything okay?" Steve asked frowning, suddenly concerned. He had only seen Katie for a few minutes after he got back but she had seemed pretty cool with him despite his little outburst.

"Well, Wanda has been pushing her buttons again." Bucky explained and Steve groaned in response. "And I don't think she's as secure about all this as she makes out.." Bucky continued but was interrupted by Steve.

"She's got nothing to worry about, Buck."

"I know that. Make sure she does." Bucky said before pushing himself up out of his chair.

Steve watched him and saw Bucky grimace in horror once he was fully stood.

"What's up, jerk?" Steve asked.

"I didn't touch your desk, did I? Steve, tell me I didn't touch your desk." Bucky said anxiously before heading for the door, shoulders shaking slightly with mirth.

Steve made a noise in his throat and grabbing a pen, launched it at Bucky. “"What makes you think it was the desk and not the chair you were sitting on?" he yelled as Bucky ran out of the office laughing.

CONTINUED IN PART 2

#csi rogers and barnes #csi au #steve rogers x original female character #steve rogers x oc #steve rogers #avengers fanfiction #avengers

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