#i was gonna finally put this in the queue but you know what. happy valentine's day. hitmen in love

[shunsuiken]

DON’T FORGET WHO’S TAKING YOU HOME (and in whose arms you’re gonna be).

pairing(s). kaeya, childe, ayato, kaveh, neuvillette x fem!reader

genre. fluff

wc. 200-400 for each character

an. AND SING WITH ME 🎤🎤 SO DARLING SAVE THE LAST DANCE FOR MEEE michael buble literally left no crumbs with this song i had to write about it omg + ALSO happy valentines day everyone !!! i may not have a valentine this year but im happy to post this for anybody feeling a little lonely today !! you are so so loved okay ?!!! come and collect a kiss from me before reading on 💋 MUAH have a lovely valentines day !!! <33

kaeya alberich

you’re really good at hiding, kaeya thinks to himself with a huff and a smile on his lips. searching all over the plaza for you was making him break a sweat in his navy blue tuxedo. with another turn around the corner he decides to remove his tuxedo jacket for the time being, folding it over his arm to carry instead.

“no, no, no klee! stop it! you can’t play with your things here, if you blow things up-”

“-master jean will put me in solitary confinement…”

oho, kaeya recognises these two voices very well. he finds it so hilarious that at the end, his feet lead him right to you! not even a single thought was processed as he turned the corner two seconds ago but here you are.

he hides behind the large potted plant, listening to the conversation you and the beloved spark knight share. he stays there until it becomes quiet between you two.

“kaeya, you peacock, i know it’s you.”

kaeya lets out a baffled noise, finally showing himself from behind the plant, offended by the ridiculous nickname you gave him. “snowflake, how dare you?”

“klee, don’t eavesdrop on people like this man when you grow older, yeah?” you point animatedly at your lover, who’s folding his arms and scoffing at you.

klee only giggles, nodding her head. “i gotta go find albedo now!” you watch as she skips off towards the plaza, waving goodbye.

you then turn towards your next problem that stands behind you. “i thought you were out dancing?”

“i was, but they’ll start playing the last dance soon and how can my last dance not be with you?” your lover walks towards you, pulling you closer by your waist with his free arm. you immediately wrap your arms around his neck, smiling softly at his intentions.

you hear an announcement echoing from the plaza before you can reply, and you figure it might have been mika because of how timid the voice sounded.

“good evening everyone, please bring all your friends and company over for the last dance of the night!”

“sounds like our queue.” you slide your arms off his shoulder to grab his hand, pulling him with you without warning.

“oh snowflake, hold on-” kaeya almost trips on air and the sounds of your laughter bounce off the concrete floor and walls as you drag him down the staircase leading to the plaza.

childe

you can never refuse ajax’s request for a dance, because he won’t take no for an answer. especially when it comes to dancing. your feet hurt so much. you’re so ready to just fall on top of your bed and go to sleep. but the only thing that keeps you wide awake, heart pumping and everything is the look on your lover's face.

his gaze usually has this inhumane and dull look to them, but you find that whenever he looks at you or when he participates in something he loves, his gaze finally twinkles. it works so miraculously too. like all of a sudden life was returned to him and he could see.

the smile on your lips grows when you think about this. you think it’s sweet how you’re one of the reasons that the life in his eyes returns.

ajax notices the tighter grip you hold on his forearm, making his lips curl in curiosity. “what’s going on in your head, baby?”

you zone in on the situation, you’re still dancing, and you shake your head in response. “nothing, ajax.” you want to keep your thoughts to yourself but when ajax smiles at you like that, with the most expectant look on his face, you can’t help yourself. “actually, i just thought about the dance.”

he twirls you around to the music before connecting arms with you again. “you just thought about the dance?” his brow quirks in amusement.

“no, no not like that,” you say with a sheepish chuckle before continuing, “i just thought that this number is the longest one so far.”

“well of course,” ajax responds with an eye smile. “it’s the last song.”

“it… is?” you look up at ajax while trying to fight the urge to look anywhere else.

if this is the last song… and you’re dancing with him… then that can only mean-

when the choreography allows ajax to pull you against his chest, he leans down so he can whisper in your ear, “you will be my final dance partner tonight.”

kamisato ayato

these few days at fontaine have been strumming the strings of your heart like a guitar—ayato has been spending so much time with you that you’re beginning to think of such ridiculous conclusions. his eyes that linger on your face, his hand that hovers on the small of your back when leading you out of a hall and it’s just these little things that he does with you that makes you want to claw an entire curtain off its rod. one time he even poured you a glass of wine before taking a sip with the same glass—it’s like he’s forgotten he’s the yashiro commissioner!

thoma and ayaka barely bat an eye. but also, they’ve known ayato for much longer than you have since you were a recent (and lovely) addition to the little family. so… perhaps this is just how he acts?

“uh-huh, when he’s courting someone that is.”

the sentence that thoma said offhandedly is the only thing that rings through your mind. but your thoughts must’ve shone through your expression because ayato is quick on his feet to smoothly guide you off the dance floor, gloved hand still holding yours as he brings you to a less crowded area—the balcony.

“you appeared to be distracted, that’s why i pulled us away,” ayato breaks the silence and your train of thoughts.

he’s still holding my hand—is what you’re repeating in your head. your eyes can barely focus on a single object within your field of vision. your bottom lip quivers at the revelation you’re carefully starting to uncover.

“i am not distracted,” you inhale sharply when you accidentally meet ayato’s gaze. “i…” your brows crease as you try to get words out of your mouth.

ayato brings your hand up to his lips, placing a chaste kiss on the back of your hand and you can physically feel the blood rush up to your fingertips. “would my lady like to return to the hotel?”

your voice leaves your throat in but a hoarse whisper, “what did you just call me?”

you hear a chuckle from ayato and it makes you snap your head around in embarrassment. this new term of endearment rolls off his tongue way too easily, the rascal must have been practicing!

“oh no, no, no, my lady, you must look at me,” a grin appears on ayato’s face at your attempts to hide your expression and when he finally gets you to look at him, you’re caged between his arms.

“why would you call me that?” you whine at his teasing.

“well i just couldn’t keep it to myself anymore,” ayato murmurs, a dust of pink decorating his cheeks. “will you allow me to call you that?”

kaveh

three hours. it’s been three hours since you and kaveh decided to learn a cute couples dance routine ‘for funsies’. whose idea was this again? weren’t you two supposed to be just friends? doesn’t kaveh have a client meeting tomorrow that he should be preparing for?

“so we do this—then this and then we’re supposed to oh—!”

the silence is deafening. the song playing in the background fades as you both stare at each other, even mirroring the same expression. eyes as wide as saucers. lips just inches from connection.

kaveh’s breath fans over your lips and you can hear the audible gulp he makes at the closeness. he’s also entirely aware that the red in his cheeks has reached his ears by now. while you, on the other hand, have started hearing the percussion of your heart in your own eardrums.

“o-oh…” your legs are frozen in place and hang on a second, why haven’t either of you let go?

his hand is respectfully sat on your waist, while the other is occupied holding your hand. you hear him inhale and it grabs your attention before you can get anymore lost in his gaze. his gaze observes your lovely face, eyes flickering from one feature to another as he whispers, “has anybody ever told you you’re pretty up close?”

you shake your head ever so slightly. “no.”

kaveh likes this answer, humming as he ponders for a moment.

your eyes sparkle when that handsome smile of his appears on his lips. he chuckles shortly at your expression, your palm feels so warm when connected with his.

“i’m glad i’m the first to tell you.”

neuvillette

“oh dear, neuvillette,” you chuckle softly, walking towards him as he takes another sip of his water. he stands in a more secluded corner of the hall, briefly greeting guests with a nod of the head. which is why he stands out like a sore thumb—arctic white hair, designer blue suit and a piercing gaze.

but that gaze doesn’t fool you. the dragon sovereign is probably pondering on retiring for the night and is only still present to keep up with appearances.

“yes, lady y/n?” it’s to nobody’s surprise that he heard you from metres away.

when he turns around, your eyes immediately land on the problem you’ve sensed since you returned from the dancefloor.

“your tie,” you reply, standing in front of his figure, nonchalantly raising your hands in preparation to adjust the garment. “will you allow me to fix it?”

the gears in neuvillette’s mind pause abruptly at your question. he certainly has no problem readjusting his own tie. his hands aren’t holding anything else other than his cup of water—which he can definitely put down on a nearby table!

but why can’t he bring himself to say no?

the ‘of course’ leaves his lips faster than he would have liked, but that’s no matter, your expression shows no sign of displeasure. instead, he watches your sweet smile brighten.

when your fingers reach the tie, neuvillette notices how you tiptoe to reach him. so he does what any normal person would do—he leans down.

it catches you off guard, the tips of your fingers just slightly grazing against his neck in the process. you profusely apologise in whispers to which neuvillette can only chuckle at.

“it is no trouble lady y/n, i appreciate the kind gesture.” the corner of neuvillette’s lips curve, his hands neatly tucked behind him as he allows you to redo his tie.

neuvillette’s lips only seem to further break into a smile as he watches you pat on the tie in completion.

“there, all finished.” you look up at the iudex, chuckling, “you ought to learn how to do this yourself.”

neuvillette hums, “perhaps you could teach me.” he takes your hand, gently brushing his lips against your knuckles before kissing it. “but for now a dance shall suffice, would you care to join me?”

[empiriical]

with a shiver of delight, ladd closes his eyes as claire whispers against him. "you'd better not go easy on me," he growls, bearing his teeth. slipping his fingers between claire's, he raises their entwined hands && presses a kiss to claire's knuckles. "i hope we can respect each other more than that."

stepping back, their linked hands remain the only point of contact, but ladd's smiling even as he drops that too. "after all! that's what love's all about, right? an equal exchange? in this case — i try to kill you, && you try your hardest to stop me. && however long it takes..." he shrugs, spinning around in place && spreading his arms wide. "well, that's what 'til death do us part means, right?"

then, in a seemingly unprompted mood shift, he snaps his fingers with a sudden thought. "let's go get dinner. let me take you out. lua too. it'll be good for all three of us."

Claire submits to his whims, a rare display of pacisifm. He's not the sort of person who folds easily, but a combination of desire and genuine love seem to tame him a little, if only here and now.

He returns Ladd's kiss, unable to stop himself from smiling even during it. It's not the first time they've kissed, despite that it hasn't even been a week since they first met, but Claire feels the same sense of warmth and delight he did when it was the first time, hidden away in the bloodied conductors' compartment of a train he's left behind forever.

"Don't get your hopes up," Claire warns, barely pulling back. Despite the somewhat serious tone, he's still smiling delightedly, as if something about Ladd's murderous intent still makes him want to smile. "You'll never kill me. You're gonna spend your whole life wanting to, but I'll always be one step ahead. And I'll accept your love whole-heartedly every time you try."

He reaches up, his own hand covering Ladd's, and moves it to the side so he can lean in on his own terms, delivering a short kiss of his own.

"Maybe," he says, just centimeters from Ladd's skin this time, "I'll even let you draw blood, once or twice. That'd really frustrate you, wouldn't it? Getting so close to killing me, only to realize I'm just goin' easy on you..."

[tigerkirby215]

5e Rakan, the Charmer build (League of Legends)

(Artwork by Riot Games)

Happy day after Valentine's Day friends. I wrote this build in August, and a lot has happened to my little bird twink during that time. Along with a damn good new skin (and you know: new season) he’s become one of the more sought out supports in pro play. Also I got him to Mastery 5 at time of writing (December 13th, 2020.) Who knows: I might update this little blurb to say I got him to a higher mastery.

Sadly I don’t have a Xayah to duo queue with. But I’m always ready to be the support that you need~ 💓

GOALS

Am I not magnificent? - Rakan’s title is literally “the charmer.” Of course we’re gonna need some charms.

War is in the dance - With an ability called “Battle Dance” we’ll need to be quick on our feat, dashing around our foes and popping them up with a Grand Entrance.

Nothing's fun without risk - While he may not be the best enchanter Rakan has a ton of heals and shields for both himself and his allies.

RACE

Rakan is half bird, but he doesn’t do a lot of flying which leaves Aarakocra out of the picture. He’s also incredibly chatty (holy shit have you seen how many voice lines Xayah and Rakan have?) so Kenku is definitely not an option. So when in Rome as a furry look no further than a Shifter.

All Shifters have Darkvision and their Shifting ability to gain temporary hitpoints, but everything else is determined by their subrace: to be ever quick and ever charming go for a Swiftstride. As a Swiftstride Shifter your Dexterity increases by 2 and your Charisma increases by 1. You are Graceful and have proficiency with the Acrobatics skill, and your Shifting feature lets you get down with The Quickness, moving 10 feet faster and being able to move 10 feet as a reaction if an enemy ends their turn within 5 feet of you, all while not provoking oppertunity attacks!

ABILITY SCORES

15; WISDOM - Rakan is all about the spirit of the wild and the subtle magic of nature. Wait Nature and Arcana are Intelligence skills? Uhhhhh... 

14; INTELLIGENCE - Rakan certainly doesn’t show that he’s smart but Nature and Arcana are Intelligence skills. That, and this is a requirement for a very particular class.

13; CHARISMA - A charmer of course needs to be charming. (Feel free to swap this with CON if you want more health but worse RP.)

12; DEXTERITY - Even if Rakan is normally shirtless this is enough for good ol’ Medium Armor thanks to our Racial stat increases.

10; CONSTITUTION - Even though Rakan plays up close and personal he’s certainly not a tank.

8; STRENGTH - You wouldn’t risk ruffling your feathers by doing heavy lifting.

BACKGROUND

While Rakan didn’t start out a rebel like Xayah he gladly joined her cause, and while a background like Entertainer might make more sense for him he’s without a doubt a Freedom Fighter now... unfortunately there’s no Freedom Fighter background so Faction Agent is the next best thing.

You get proficiency with any Intelligence, Wisdom, or Charisma ability and naturally we’ll be going for Performance. You also get proficiency in Insight but we’re actually going to be replacing it with Arcana for knowledge of the magic of the wild. Additionally you can learn two languages of your choice: unfortunately Aarakocra isn’t an option but Auran (or rather Primordial) is. And to learn the ancient language of Ionia I’d recommend Sylvan.

As a vastayan rebel you can gain access to a Safe Haven for you and your allies. By using secret signs and passwords you can identify other rebels who can bring you to a safe house, give you a free place to stay, or assist you in finding information. They won’t risk their lives for you but as long as you remember the password they’ll be willing to help. You... did remember the password, right?

(Artwork by Riot Games)

THE BUILD

LEVEL 1 - CLERIC 1

Starting off as a Cleric, the king of supports. As a Cleric you get proficiency in two skills from the Cleric list: this is actually where we’ll be grabbing Insight proficiency from along with Medicine to keep Xayah safe.

Clerics get to choose their subclass at level 1 and there are obviously a lot of options to go for: Peace to bond with Xayah, War to better your battle dance, Nature or Arcana to further your connection to natural magic... Bet you wouldn’t expect the choice to be the Order Domain from Guildmasters’ Guide to Ravnica! (Also reprinted in Tasha’s Cauldron.) (I’ll go over why Order whenever we get abilities important to the build.)

For a start Order Clerics get proficiency in Heavy Armor as well as either Intimidation or Persuasion; Xayah’s got the scary part down so go for Persuasion, since someone’s gotta be the smooth talker! You also get Voice of Authority, letting you set up for an ally with a Grand Entrance. If you cast a spell with a spell slot and target an ally they can use their reaction to make one weapon attack against a creature of your choice. You have to be able to see the enemy you want them to target, and if you target multiple allies with a spell only one of them can use their reaction to attack. But setting up for friends to cut through foes is what you do best!

Speaking of spells and set-up Clerics get access to Spellcasting! You can learn three cantrips at level 1: for a Gleaming Quill grab Sacred Flame which does Radiant damage (not Fire damage!) to a foe. If you’re getting surrounded however Word of Radiance will let you shine on your foes for more Radiant damage! And to be a good support and help your allies out of combat Guidance lets you add a d4 to ability checks.

You can also prepare a number of spells equal to your Wisdom modifier plus your Cleric level. As an Order Domain Cleric you have Heroism and Command as part of your Domain Spells, meaning that you don’t have to prepare to be the hero and force your enemies in line. For a close range heal look no further than Cure Wounds. For a shield grab Shield of Faith to make it harder for enemies to kill your allies. And to set up for your friends grab Bless, making it easier for them to hit and survive.

LEVEL 2 - CLERIC 2

Second level Clerics can Channel Divinity once per short or long rest, invoking the power of the gods to help them. All Clerics can Turn Undead, forcing undead within 30 feet to make a Wisdom save or run away from you. However Order Clerics can charm their foes with Order’s Demand. You can charm (yes charm!) anyone of your choice within 30 feet until the end of your next turn, or until they take damage. Additionally you can force them to drop whatever they’re holding so they don’t shoot Xayah!

This is one of the many abilities I wanted out of Order Domain. A big AoE charm that also stops enemies from hitting you and your friends is right up Rakan’s alley.

You can also prepare another spell and while Rakan doesn’t have a ranged heal in-game Healing Word is just too good to pass up on as an Order Cleric. Bonus action let your friend whack an enemy!

LEVEL 3 - WIZARD 1

Didn’t take Rakan as the bookish type, did you? Well, he isn’t, but we need some abilities from Wizard that we can’t get elsewhere except Clockwork Sorcerer which makes even less sense for Rakan. Regardless Wizards also get Spellcasting. You learn 3 cantrips from the Wizard list: for a more direct autoattack grab Firebolt because I like having a variety of damaging cantrips, to add some pizzazz to your dance Prestidigitation will let you add a bunch of funky visual effects as you please, and for some coordination in Team Chat grab Message! "Did you notice the sky?" "It's lovely." "Not as beautiful as you."

You can prepare a number of spells equal to your Wizard level plus your Intelligence modifier, but when you multiclass into Wizard you can learn 4 spells to put in your spellbook. You can only prepare spells in your spellbook is the long-and-short of the class. Anyways: to bedazzle your foes grab Color Spray and blind them with your beauty. For a little owl companion take Find Familiar. To run when you need to Expeditious Retreat will help. And finally to detect the magic of the world take... Detect Magic...

Wizards also have Arcane Recovery, letting them recover a spell slots of a combined level equal to half their Wizard level rounded down. In short every spell slot counts the same number of “points” as the spell’s level, and you can recover a number of spell points equal to half your Wizard level. So a third level Wizard can either recover a 2nd level spell or two 1st level spells. Oh and you can’t recover spell slots past 5th level.

LEVEL 4 - WIZARD 2

Second level Wizards can choose their Arcane Tradition, and to protect yourself with Fey Feathers the School of Abjuration is here for you. Along with being an Abjuration Savant (letting you learn Abjuration spells in half the time for half the cost) you have an Arcane Ward to shield you: when you cast a leveled Abjuration spell you can also create a magical ward on yourself that lasts until you finish a long rest. The ward has a hit point maximum equal to twice your Wizard level plus your Intelligence modifier. (So currently 6 HP.)

Whenever you take damage, the ward takes the damage instead. If the damage reduces the ward to 0 hit points, you take any remaining damage. Whenever you cast an abjuration spell of 1st level or higher, the ward regains a number of hit points equal to twice the level of the spell.

You also learn 2 more spells so how about some Abjuration spells? Shield is a reaction Abjuration spell to protect you from melee attacks, while Absorb Elements is a reaction Abjuration spell to protect you from magic. AR and MR!

(Artist unknown. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 5 - WIZARD 3

3rd level Wizards can learn second level spells but I’d actually suggest learning Alarm back at 1st level. Why Alarm? It’s an Abjuration spell you can cast as a Ritual, so you can just cast it continuously to refresh your Arcane Ward even without preparing the spell. For your other spell Mirror Image is a quick and easy way to keep the baddies from whacking you.

LEVEL 6 - WIZARD 4

4th level Wizards get an Ability Score Improvement but I’m actually going to suggest the Observant feat to increase your uneven Wisdom score. Every Support’s gotta pay attention to their wards!

You can also learn another two spells along with a cantrip: take Dancing Lights to set up a stage! As for spells you’re the loud and proud sort so to make a Grand Entrance grab Knock to make way for your party! Meanwhile if you want to keep yourself and your allies safe from ranged harm Warding Wind will do just that and more, but it will also make it harder for Xayah to hit. "What the hell were you thinking?" "Back there?" "Yes." "I wasn't. I never think. Ugh... thinking."

LEVEL 7 - WIZARD 5

5th level Wizards can learn third level spells so it’s time to grab our first mass charm: Hypnotic Pattern, which isn’t an Enchantment spell but in fact an Illusion spell (which will be important later.) If you want to get down with The Quickness however there’s nothing better than some good old-fashioned Haste.

LEVEL 8 - WIZARD 6

6th level Abjuration Wizards can finally protect their party and their girlfriend thanks to Projected Ward, letting you use your reaction to reduce the damage an ally takes with your Arcane Ward. “Thank you honey!”

You can also learn two more spells from the Wizard spell list. Xayah need to call someone? Help her with Sending. Want to go full AP for the traditional D&D Grand Entrance? Fireball.

(Artwork by Riot Games)

LEVEL 9 - CLERIC 3

We’ve spent enough time down in Nerdsville so how about some more Cleric levels? Third level Clerics can prepare second level spells like Aid to boost up your teammates with a Knight’s Vow. Speaking of Knight’s Vow Warding Bond will let you bond with Xayah so you take some damage for her.

Additionally as an Order Domain Cleric you have Hold Person and Zone of Truth innately prepared. Keep enemies at bay and let them know the truth!

LEVEL 10 - CLERIC 4

4th level Clerics get an Ability Score Improvement and I’m going to suggest further increasing your Wisdom, as it’ll help us more with our Cleric abilities which will be important later.

You also learn another cantrip such as Mending to keep your outfit in check. Additionally you can prepare two new spells with your increased Wisdom: Lesser Restoration can give you or Xayah some Tenacity when needed, but I’d suggest holding off on the other slot.

LEVEL 11 - CLERIC 5

5th level Clerics who use Turn Undead now Destroy Undead of CR 1/2 or lower. It’s unlikely that you’ll be fighting CR 1/2 enemies at level 11 but hey: it’s still useful!

What’s more useful however is that you can now prepare third level spells! As an Order Cleric you have Mass Healing Word for Redemption, or Slow to... slow the enemy. Maybe you grabbed Righteous Glory? Who knows.

Regardless the important thing is your charms so grab Fast Friends to charm single targets and Incite Greed to get a whole crowd to follow your Fey Feathers!

You may be asking why we’re grabbing Enchantment Spells of all the spells that Clerics get a third level. Well for one it’s because you’re The Charmer, but more importantly...

LEVEL 12 - CLERIC 6

At 6th level you become an Embodiment of the Law as an Order Domain Cleric. The law of dance that is! If you cast an Enchantment spell of first level or higher you can choose to make that spell a bonus action instead, and can do it a number of times equal to your Wisdom modifier. You regain these fast charms after a long rest.

This was the main reason I went into Order Domain. Being able to quickly charm foes is textbook for Rakan, which made this subclass ideal for this build.

You can also prepare another spell at this level: Dispel Magic with Mikael's Crucible in case of any strong debuffs. Also more Abjuration spells for your shield!

(Artwork by Yusuh on DeviantArt. You have no idea how hard it is to find solo artwork for these two.)

LEVEL 13 - WIZARD 7

7th level Wizards can learn 4th level spells like Confusion; something that fills my allies whenever I take Rakan into the jungle. For your other spell I’d actually suggest hopping back to third level for Counterspell to keep your allies safe with more Abjuration. Trust me it’ll be important later.

LEVEL 14 - WIZARD 8

At 8th level you get an Ability Score Improvement and despite being a Wizard we’ve kinda been ignoring Intelligence: let’s fix that with a +2 so our Ward can be stronger as can our Wizard spells.

You can also learn two new spells: more Charms? Charm Monster, so even the mighty Volibear can’t resist you. Other than that there are tons of great Wizard spells but I’m never going to say no to Dimension Door.

LEVEL 15 - WIZARD 9

9th level Wizards can cast 5th level spells like Dominate Person for charms on-par with mind control! (Because it is Mind Control.) For more combative 5th level spells Synaptic Status will let you bedazzle everyone in a 20 foot radius sphere, making it harder to hit as they’re stunned by your beauty. Rakan can have some AP; as a treat.

LEVEL 16 - WIZARD 10

10th level Abjuration Wizards get Improved Abjuration, letting them add their proficiency bonus to any ability check to Dispel Magic (such as with Dispel Magic or Counterspell.) If you wish you can also have Bless active on yourself for a d4 + 5 to any counterspell check. When you consider that the DC is equal to 10 plus the spell’s level and you have up to a +9 to the check it’s more than likely that you can be a Guardian against any dangerous spells!

You also get another cantrip at this level: do you already have too many cantrips? Yeah probably, but to get more props for your dance take Minor Illusion.

As for your two new Wizard spells Hold Monster is like Hold Person, but it works on Baron! And how about something to keep Zoe in her dimension? Banishment is a 4th level spell that works like a super CC that knocks an enemy out of the fight completely. You can’t attack them while they’re on another plane, but if they’re not native to the plane and spend a full minute Banished they go back to their original plane.

(Artwork by Riot Games)

LEVEL 17 - WIZARD 11

11th Wizards can prepare 6th level spells. Want to keep Xayah safe from a falling temple and shadow ninjas? Globe of Invulnerability blocks all spells of one level lower than you used to cast the spell. In general. The globe surrounds you but you can dive in to protect Xayah. But what if you just want to dance? Look no further than Otto's Irresistible Dance! It’s a spell that forces everyone to dance; that’s all you need to know! But seriously read the description of your spells.

LEVEL 18 - WIZARD 12

12th level Wizards get another Ability Score Improvement: seeing as we are going deep down the Wizard path it only makes sense to get a bit more Intelligence.

You can also learn 2 more spells: Contingency will let you cast a spell in case of emergency. Choose a spell of 5th level or lower that can target yourself and a trigger for the spell: when the trigger happens the spell activates. Backup plans are more of Xayah’s thing, but something like “Banish myself if I’m about to die because Xayah would kill herself if I died” is a good plan.

There are tons of other good Wizard spells; so many that I can’t choose any that would particularly fit Rakan or the build as a whole. You have a limited number of prepared spells anyways so take something you think will be useful.

LEVEL 19 - WIZARD 13

13th level Wizards can prepare 7th level spells: want to do a conjoined recall? Teleport will let you and up to 8 willing creates teleport to a location, such as your fountain. There’s a table of places you can end up which I suggest looking at for the full details of the spell, because it’s a rather overwhelming spell to explain without copy-pasting the description. But because I further suffer with what spells to give you in a high leveled Wizard build how about a fancy light show? Crown of Stars lets seven stars orbit your head which you can shoot out at enemies or light up the night!

LEVEL 20 - WIZARD 14

Our capstone is the 14th level of Abjuration Wizard for some much needed MR. Spell Resistance lets you resist all damage coming from spells and have advantage on all saving throws against spells!

Speaking of spells you can learn your final two but... pick for yourself this time! Xayah will love you despite all your faults, and I’m sure that you can make a choice for yourself. This is my way of saying I’m sick of picking Wizard spells.

FINAL BUILD

PROS

You will see my dance - You are the master of keeping your friends safe with charms to keep fights from happening and both shields and heals to keep your allies from being hurt.

Look at me now! - You are incredibly elusive: 18 AC (Scale Mail + Shield) you can bump up with the Shield spell, a 32 HP ward to protect you and your allies, and even Shifting for Temp HP and more dodging.

You put us in a cage? I put you in the ground - And of course as a caster with full caster levels you are more than capable of putting down the hurt, especially due to the added efficiency of being able to cast two spells in a turn (well a leveled spell and a cantrip) thanks to Embodiment of the Law.

CONS

I don't have to remember the plan if you do - You are essentially mixing two spellcasters who want you to use extremely dedicated spell lists. Abjuration spells to make Abjuration Wizard work and Enchantment Spells to make Order Cleric work. Sure you don’t only need to cast Enchantment and Abjuration spells but there also aren’t that many Abjuration spells to power up your ward.

I can't die looking this good! - The vast majority of your levels being in Wizard combined with a 0 Constitution score results in a health bar that’s easily under 100. You may have advantage on all saving throws but Power Word Kill has no save.

Woo! You animals are dumb! - The other problem with mixing two full casters together is that you can’t get the best of both worlds. You aren’t getting 9th level spells in general (even if you get the slots for ‘em) and both your Wisdom and your Intelligence aren’t maxed out. Sure if you aren’t using Standard Array that isn’t an issue but you’re bound to drop something.

But if you were perfect why would you need Xayah? She completes you, and you complete her. Fight along side her and together you’ll be unstoppable. There’s nothing you can’t defeat with the power of love... But a plan would also probably be good. "I think Xayah told me to improvise. At least, that's the only part of the plan I remember."

(Artwork by Riot Games)

[reckoningss]

Sickday ❤️

Summary: Staying home sick wasn’t a part of your Valentine’s Day. Lucky for you, Eddie & Co. come around to look after you.

Pairing: Eddie Brock x Reader

Warnings: Fluff. Killing Eve Spoilers? (Not really)

Wordcount: 1.5k

A/N: I’m feeling all lovey-dovey and shit so I’m gonna try to put out a few Valentine-themed fics before the big day, starting with this one. Feedback is always welcome.

It takes about a minute for your brain to spur your aching joints and muscles into action after the first knock. Finally managing to pry yourself off of the couch, you hobble to the door - the hem of your comforter dragging the floor behind you like a train. Both deadbolts slide free with a heavy thock and then the gentle click of the mortice lock and you open the door to reveal a sight for sore eyes. 

Eddie stands in your doorway sporting sweatpants slung low around his hips and that familiar beige hoodie beneath a leather jacket. Two plastic bags dangle from one hooked index finger while a backpack swings from the other and a sheepish smile ties the whole display together, complete with sleepy eyes and damp black hair. 

You have to admit, your heart melts a bit.

“Hey.” 

You sniffle, trying for a smile. “Hey.” 

Eddie looks you over and, if you had the energy for shame, you’d probably be burning up with it. Beneath the king-sized comforter you are currently wearing like a cape, you’re in a stained, oversized Morehouse tee - three days old - and scandalously short pajama bottoms. Holed fuzzy socks adorn your feet, a three-day-old twistout adorns your head and a rolled up scrap of tissue hangs from one runny nostril. Fortunately (unfortunately?) you feel too terrible to care much about your appearance. 

Eddie finishes his silent assessment of you. shoulders his backpack and sucks his teeth sympathetically. “Oi.”

You laugh pitifully, pulling him into the apartment by the drawstrings of his hoodie. “Just know that however bad I look right now, I feel ten times worse.”

Eddie kicks the door shut and pulls you in for a hug. “Ohhhhh.” You nestle your forehead into the curve of his neck and let him walk you back through the entrance hallway and into the living room - half carrying you. He sits you on the couch. “That’s why I brought some wellness essentials.”

The living room doesn’t look much better than you do. The couch is a nest of blankets beside which sits a small trashcan brimming with used tissues and microwavable soup cups. The ottoman is scattered with prescription bottles and the empty husks of over the counter medicine capsules. Other household detritus litters the hardwood floor. You remove the tissue from your nose and deposit it into the trashcan, sniffing loudly. “Show me what you’ve got.” 

Eddie exaggerates a look of revulsion before continuing. He digs into the first bag and pulls out a small box. “Mentholatum from that bodega across the street from my apartment.” He returns back to the bag and produces a tall styrofoam takeout bowl. condensation gathering on the plastic lid. “Chicken ramen from that place on Fillmore. Cough drops, more tissue, spa socks and ....” 

He digs into the backpack now with an air of importance. “Last but not least, Killing Eve.” 

The cellophane wrapping still glints on the DVD case - brand new. You gesture to the TV where SportsCenter is muted. “You know we could just watch that on Hulu, right?” 

Eddie shakes his head, holding the Season one set like a holy artifact. “Some things are worth owning. Tangibly.”

You nod in agreement. “Thank you.” 

“No problem.” Eddie stands from the couch and leans over to kiss your forehead. “I’m going to throw this ramen in a pot to heat up. Wanna queue that up?” 

You nod as Eddie leaves the room, taking the trashcan with him. 

You hum contentedly while Eddie gently rubs menthol into your back. His hands are warm. You’re desperately fighting the desire to fall asleep. Eddie presses a thumb into a tense knot near your spine and you nearly groan from the relief.  On the screen, Eve Polastri interrogates a hysteric woman.

“Thanks for coming over.” Your voice is simultaneously nasal and sleepy. “I know you wanted to go do stuff today.” 

Eddie leans forward and kisses your cotton-covered shoulder murmuring something incomprehensible and then, quietly, “just wanna do you.” 

“Oh?” You crane your neck to look back at him, eyebrows raised. 

Eddie blushes - wide-eyed - and stumbles over his words. “This. I just wanted to do this - spend time with you.” 

You laugh but quickly dissolve into a coughing fit that doubles you over. 

Eddie withdraws his hand from beneath your shirt and grabs your shoulders. “You alright?” 

You nod - coughs already beginning to dwindle - and take a few deep breaths. Through the open mouth of Eddie’s backpack, you see something red glimmer.

“What’s that?” You’re already hauling the thing out into the low light. A red, heart-shaped box rests in your hands. ‘Be Mine’ is scrawled on the lid in golden, printed calligraphy. You hug the box to your chest and grin back at Eddie. “Is this for me?” 

Eddie nods and leans back to sling his arm over the back of the couch, looking very pleased with himself. A hand goes over his stubbled chin. “Yeah. Happy Valentine’s day.”

“You open the lid to reveal two dozen artisanal chocolates smiling up at you from between crepe paper sleeves. “Thank you. It’s really sweet.” 

You think about sampling one but your stomach roils a bit at the thought of eating something so sweet. You hold the box out toward Eddie. “Happy Valentine’s day, Venom, from the bottom of my heart.” 

Eddie chuckles and Venom finally makes an appearance. Strings of globulous black matter bubble up between the stitches of Eddie’s hoodie and grow into a distinctly inhuman head over Eddie’s left shoulder - long and cylindrical, oblong eyes completely white, wide grinning mouth replete with rows of yellow teeth. You stifle a shudder and smile instead, you still haven’t gotten completely used to this part. 

“Hi.”

Venom observes you, twisting his snake-like head and stretching closer. “Hello.” 

You hold up the box of chocolates. “I got you something.” 

Behind Venom, Eddie rolls his eyes dramatically. You just shoot him a shit-eating grin. Venom’s tongue slithers out of his mouth - the length of your forearm and dripping - and you very nearly drop the box. You’ve been making an effort to befriend the otherworldly being your boyfriend shares a body with - you really have - and you’ve made some progress too, but that doesn’t make it any less weird or unnerving. Venom selects a piece of chocolate with his tongue and flicks it into his cavernous mouth. 

“Good?” 

“MMMM” Venom’s voice is like gravel in a washing machine. You set the chocolates down on the ottoman and let him have at it. 

Four episodes later, you’re spooning broth out of your bowl of ramen while Eddie picks out chicken and clumps of noodles with lightsaber chopsticks. Venom, having finished the chocolates three episodes back, is now content to look around your apartment and float silently over Eddie’s shoulder. 

You yawn. “Thanks for taking care of me today.”

Eddie shrugs. “That’s what I’m built for.” He holds up his hand and clicks the tips of the chopsticks together - Obi-Wan And Darth Vader clashing weapons. “These hands? Made to take care of you.” 

You snort. “Oh yeah?” 

Eddie places the bowl of ramen on the side-table at the end of your couch. “Hell yeah.” He scoops you up and drags you into his lap, burying his face in your neck as he tickles you. 

You squeal and push him away. “Stop! I’m sick and gross.” 

Eddie cradles the back of your head and looks down at you. “You know what?” His voice takes on a whispered, conspiratorial tone. “That’s why I have this thing that keeps me from getting sick and makes me, like, super fast and strong an-”

You whisper too. “Sounds rad. Can I get some of that?”

Eddie’s leaning in again, eyes on your lips. “I’ll have to talk to my guy.”

“Ohhhh, your guy.”

“Yeah.”

Eddie moves to close the gap but you flinch back, cringing.

“Sorry, I just can’t with him watching.” You incline your head to the right in response to Eddie’s quizzical look. Venom hovers off to the side, staring impassively, expression unreadable.

Eddie blinks at the alien, unimpressed. “Bye Venom.”

Venom narrows his eyes - first at Eddie, then at you. Your hands fist possessively in the front of Eddie’s hoodie.

“I gave you chocolate, now give me my boyfriend.”

Venom’s tongue flicks one more time - for your benefit, you think - before he disappears back into Eddie’s shoulder.

Eddie chuckles at something you can’t hear and tisks at you. “You’re making him rethink liking you.”

A playful grin and an “I’ll make it up to him,” are your only response.

Eddie’s eyes are on your lips again and he presses in to brush his nose against yours. “Now where were we...”

It’s starting to drizzle outside. Eddie strokes your cheek as you lie with your head in his lap. You yawn and snuggle closer. Pausing, Eddie looks down at you and tucks a curl behind your ear.

“Tired?”

You yawn again. “Mhm.”

“Gonna take a nap?”

“Most likely.”

“Ok.” Eddie reaches for the throw hanging in the back of the couch and drapes it over you. “Go to sleep. I’ll be here.”

You catch one final glimpse of Eve staring intently at a picture of the assassin as your eyes flutter closed. “Hmm... you know they’re in love.”

“Eddie resumes running his thumb carefully along your cheek. “Who, us?”

“Eve and Villanelle.” You’re drifting now. “Us too.”

Tagging: @kingniazx

[saxonspud]

Untitled OC RDR2 fanfic

Thought I would give first person POV a try. If I continue, this will be chapter one.

Dutch lose’s his pocket watch and ruby

As I approached the house, something didn't feel right. Everything looked normal, but I had a feeling. Call it a gut instinct.

The sun was beginning to set, as I approached the small cabin.

I led Chance, my appaloosa mare, into the barn.

“Don’t get too comfortable, we’ve got to go out again in a while,” I whispered.

She nudged me.

“I know old girl, but I need to make some money,” I sighed.

Leaving the barn I headed towards the house. It was shrouded in darkness. That was what was wrong. My Daddy, even when he was drunk, wouldn’t sit there in the dark.

I opened the door, tentatively. Looking inside I allowed my eyes to become accustomed to the gloom. There was still a little light filtering in from the dying sun. It didn't take me long to see the body of my father, propped against the edge of the chair.

It wouldn’t have been unusual for me to find him semi-conscious. Usually passed out drunk, but not usually on the floor. That was strange.

“Daddy?” I called out. No response.

I grabbed a lamp from the table, and lit it.

I could now see what had happened.

He had a bloody nose, and bruises starting to appear on his face. No sign of a bottle of whisky anywhere. I rushed over, and managed to man-handle him onto the chair. He groaned. I let out a sigh of relief. He was drunk most of the time, these days. Ever since we lost mama. But I loved him just the same.

“Daddy? What happened.” I asked, as he started to come round.

He groaned, “Jesse, they took it...I couldn’t pay so they took it.”

Tears started to trickle from his eye.

“What Daddy, what did they take?”

I glanced around the cabin, only just noticing the ransacked state it was in. Cupboards flung open, draws thrown on the floor.

“Her wedding band, they took your mama’s wedding band.” he sobbed.

I flew into a rage, “god-damn money lenders,” I growled.

I was angry. Angry with my Daddy, for stooping that low. Angry with myself, because I couldn’t make enough money. But more than anything, angry with the money lender, for preying on people who couldn’t pay him back, then sending the muscle round.

“C’mon Daddy, lets get you to bed.”

I eased my father to his feet, he put his arm around my shoulder and I helped him to bed.

Once he was laying on the bed, I covered him with a blanket.

I turned to leave him, but he grabbed my hand. “I...I’m sorry,” he moaned.

I rubbed the back of his hand. “Don’t Daddy, its not your fault… Whoever did this is gonna be sorry...real sorry,” I hissed.

I walked out of his room, and gently closed the door.

I looked out of the window towards the barn. I needed to head into town, to try and make some money. I’d also see if I could find out who did this to my Daddy.

I didn’t really like the idea, of leaving my Daddy, but I didn’t have much choice. Doing what I was about to do, I liked even less. But with little work to be had, and no food on the table, I had little choice.

I went to the barn and lead Chance out. I quickly mounted her, and headed off at a trot.

It didn’t take long to reach the local town, and I headed to the large saloon.

Valentine, the livestock town always seem to smell of pig shit. I hated the place, but it was a good place to make money. At least for me. People stopped here, just passing through. I could relieve them of their valuables, and never see them again.

I walked through the doors. Eddie the owner of Smithfield’s, glared at me from behind the bar. He looked run off his feet. The saloon was unusually busy.

“Jesse! You’re late,” he growled.

I walked behind the bar, “sorry Eddie, some lowlife beat up my Daddy.”

His expression softened, “real sorry to here that, Jesse. Your Daddy didn’t deserve that. But we’re hellish busy tonight.”

I nodded, “so I see. This might lighten the load.” I handed him a money clip.

Eddie raised his eyebrows, and nodded to the table in the corner.

“That table have ordered some drinks, smart dressed fella over there should be right up your street,” he chuckled.

I smiled, and patted Eddie on the shoulder, and quickly removed my coat, and hung it on the hook in the store room.

I grabbed a tray and some glasses, carefully filling each one with some whisky.

We had a nice little deal going, Eddie and me. I would wait tables for him, relieve the patrons of there valuables, they would be none the wiser.

After taking them to the nearest fence, Eddie would get 15%. He would also pay me the going rate, for a waitress. Which was usually a lot less than the 15% he made from me.

If I got caught, then he’d claim to know nothing about it.

Eddie would always point me in the direction of strangers, who looked like they were just passing through. We never lifted anything from the regulars, that would be too risky.

I adjusted my dress, so that I was showing enough of myself to be a distraction, and let my blonde hair, cascade over one shoulder, leaving my neck bare the other side. I picked up the tray, and headed towards the corner table.

There were three men sitting there. An older gentlemen, smartly dressed, with blond hair, beginning to go grey. He was clean shaven. The second man, was dark. Dark hair, dark clothes, very smartly dressed, younger than the first. But my eyes snapped to the gold rings, and the ruby hanging off his waist coat. The third man, looked rough. Rough clothes, a rough beard, but his eyes. They looked like sapphires.

“Sorry gentlemen, for the delay. We’re a little busy tonight,” I said, smiling as sweetly as I could. I placed a glass in front of each of them.

“Oh it was worth it, but only if you promise that only you will bring us our drinks tonight,” the man with the ruby said, flirtatiously.

I giggled, but inwardly felt nauseous. These city folks were all the same.

“Why don’t I bring you another round,” I suggested.

He slid some money across the table. As I went to pick it up, he put his hand over the top of mine.

“keep the change,” he purred.

I smiled again, “thank you sir!”

I beat a hasty retreat, and headed back to the bar.

“Well?” Eddie asked, as I returned.

I opened my mouth, and poked my finger in it, pretending to vomit. “the usual creeps, but one of them is loaded,” I whispered.

“Just be careful,” he warned.

I nodded “I may need a little assistance for this one,” I added, before I loaded the tray with glasses again. I gave it a few minutes before I headed back to the table.

I had just reached the table, where I placed down the tray, before removing the empties, and replacing them with the filled glasses.

As if on queue, my stooge arrived. Billy, a friend of Eddies. When we needed to lift something that needed a little more distraction, he was always happy to lend a hand, for a cut.

Billy grabbed me from behind, playing the drunk.

“Jesse, where have you been, sweetheart.”

I shrieked, “No, Please get off.”

As if on queue, the dark haired man stood up, “I think you need to unhand the lady,” he growled.

Billy, shoved me into the man, he was knocked slightly of balance, enough for me to lift what I wanted from him. Sliding it into Billies pocket.

Eddie came rushing over and grabbed Billy, “get out, he yelled. I’ve told you about keeping your hands to yourself.”

He manhandled Billy to the door, as I turned on the fake water works.

Eddie came back, put his arm around my shoulder.

“I hope she’s ok?” the man asked.

Eddie nodded, “she’ll be fine,” he said as he escorted me a way from the table.

It was at that point, all hell broke loose. The man stood up, and grabbed me by the shoulder.

“so you think you can steal from me, do you?” he growled.

Eddie turned around, “what the hell are you talking about!” he hissed, “she’s just been molested, and you’re calling her a thief!”

I started to sob, blinking and making big brown doe eyes, allowing the tears to run down my face. I was such a good actress.

“I’m not a thief, I haven’t taken anything.”I sobbed

The man looked angry. Maybe lifting from him had been a mistake. He grabbed hold of my arm, his fingers digging in roughly.

He shoved his hand into my skirt pocket, searching around for his stolen pocket watch and ruby. He pulled out a picture in a small frame.

“What’s this!” he hissed.

Eddie glared at him, “that’s her mama, she died last month.”

I did miss my mama, but if we ever got caught, this always made the victim feel bad. Like right now.

I increased the volume of the sobbing, quite dramatically.

“I’m sorry,” the man said, “I must have been mistaken.”

Eddie grabbed the photo off of him, and escorted me back to the bar, then into the store room at the back.

“That was fucking close!” he hissed. “you better stay here, until closing time.”

I nodded, the last thing I needed was for them to follow me.

“What’s Billy done with the goods?” I asked.

Eddie chuckled, “usual place, in the metal box in your barn.”

I nodded, and watched as Eddie returned to the bar.

I hated this part the most. Sitting on my backside for two hours, pretending to be distraught. Eddie wasn't too keen either, as it meant he had to tend the bar by himself.

Finally Eddie came back, “They’ve left, they’re still trying figure out, who lifted it,” he chuckled.

I pulled on my coat. “I better get home, I need to go check on Daddy.”

Eddie nodded, “hope your Daddy is ok.”

“If you hear anything, let me know, I intend to find the bastard that did it,” I sneered.

Eddie nodded, “what do you reckon tonight’s little haul’ll fetch?”

I chuckled, “a few hundred, I’ll get you and Billy’s share back to you as soon as I’ve dealt with the fence.”

Eddie smiled, “stay safe Jesse.”

I nodded, and headed out the door, to where Chance was hitched.

I quickly looked round, making sure no one was lurking. It was pretty late, and dark so I quickly mounted up and headed for home.

[lovinmullen]

Nothing Could Beat This Perfect Day...

Here’s my Valentine’s Day Gift Exchange, for the lovely @scientifthicc . Hello, i’m Leo(the locker boy). ‘Tis I, you’re valentine and i hope you’re having the most amazing day possible. I hope you enjoy this fluffy lil one-shot i’ve put togther for you, it’s Tyrus, with background of Bandi and Wonah, at pride !! ++ if you don’t like it i’ll more than happy make you something else because i don’t actually know if this is good or not sksksk,, i’m sorry if it’s bad but ilysm,, i hope you enjoy it and happy valentine’s day💘❤️

also !!! here’s a quick thank you to @swingsetboys for organising this absolutely lovely event !!! thank you endlessly for creating such a wholesome and lovely idea, i hope you have an amazing day !!💝💗

Also quick notes, i’m from UK and like not a big part, at all. i literally saw a tumblr post once where some geezer thought my city didn’t actually exist soooo sksksk... BUT we still do have a pride parade and that is the only pride i’ve ever been to because my parents don’t like me going to the really big ones like in London or Manchester ect. so i just wanted to give some context, because thats the only pride i’ve been to, so that’s what this fic is based upon. firstly, you march through the centre of town until you reach this massive fucking park / field and it is held there. there’s stalls where you can by flags, get face paint and have good, there’s a massive stage we’re bands and drag queens perform and then their are some roller coaster like rides. i’ve heard its very different in America so i thought i would just clear that up sksks sorry to be annoying💌

——————————<3

‘Boo’, TJ whispered jokingly into Cyrus’ ear as he engulfed the smaller boy in a back hug and then followed the action with a kiss to his boyfriend's cheek.

‘Watch the glitter Teej!!’ Cyrus complained, giggling while a pout ghosted his lips. He turned around to see Tyler in all his beauty. His hair was fluffy and soft with no product in it, just how Cyrus liked it, he had his bulky yet adorable glasses on, rainbow pride flags painted across his cheeks and the biggest smile plastered on his face. He truly did look perfect, as always, Cyrus reminded himself fondly, a proud smile arriving at his lips. TJ was, his boyfriend. Cyrus Goodman was dating, the Tyler Joseph Kippen. Wow, Cyrus thought, happily. That boy truly was so whipped and so far gone. TJ and Cyrus or CJ, no, Tyrus, as Cy liked to call them, had been dating for almost a year now and the thought of the dirty blonde boy, even liking him back, let alone dating him, still makes the younger boy ecstatic.

‘Are you ready to meet the others?’ Cyrus questioned standing on his tiptoes to press a light kiss to TJ’s lips. The kiss was soft and tender. It was filled with so much love and Cyrus, honestly, couldn't be happier.

Cyrus and TJ walked to where the march would take place, hand in hand, lovingly without a care in the world. They were safe, happy and two boys in love, who couldn't wait for the pride parade to begin.

As they got closer to the meeting place of the march, they were met with Buffy and Andi sitting on the ground peacefully playing with each other's hands laughing loudly to one another over a joke Jonah had said, sitting across from them. Andi and Buffy were draped in Andi’s pansexual pride flag, sitting as closely together as possible, Andi honestly, should have just sat on Buffy's lap. Across from them, Jonah and Walker were sat horizontally from one another cross-legged with Jonah sitting as still as possible while Walker carefully painted an elegant and beautiful bisexual pride flag, in the shape of a heart across Jonah's cheeks. The paint was smooth and thick but it still failed to hide Jonah's blindingly pink blush that appeared when the artistic boy caressed his cheeks lovingly and placed a short but sweet peck to his boyfriend's lips.

-

When Cyrus and TJ finally came into view of the others they were swarmed with hugs and screams of excitement from their friends.

“Come on you slowcoaches let's get going !!!” Buffy screamed giddily grabbing the hands nearest to her as she tried to drag her friends along.

“Slowcoaches??” TJ questioned pulling his hand out of Buffy's grasp, “Is that a challenge Driscoll?” TJ asked mischievously, a smirk falling onto his lips.

“Oh God, not here too” Andi and Cyrus pleaded and then sighed in unison, rolling their eyes playfully at their significant others, before bursting out into a laugh.

“Yeah, a challenge you’re gonna lose!!”

“Oh shut up Driscoll I-”

“Let me guess” she sighed now mimicking TJ’s voice, “I CoUlD dO tHaT ShIT iN My sLeEP” “Bold of you to assume I actually sleep...” TJ states, lifting an eyebrow.

Walker tried to intervene but he was too late. He blinked for one second. BLINKED and they were already off, playfully shoving each other as they ran through the crowd, daring each other to run faster until one gave way.

-

Cyrus was sat on TJ’s lap with his head against the jocks chest as they tangled their hands together. Tyler was tapping their intertwined fingers lightly against Cyrus’ legs, to the tune of the blaring music filling the field.

They were watching the drag queens dance from the distance while Buffy and Andi were up close screaming their hearts out, dancing while throwing their linked hands in the air, bouncing uncontrollably. Jonah and Walker were watching them sweetly from the queue for milkshakes, placing bets on whos drink would go flying first. A bet which Walker ended up winning.

“Jonnnnneeee, stop laughing!!” Walker pleaded jokingly as he chuckled, hitting Jonah's arm lightly, “it's not polite”

Jonah stuck his tongue out to blow a raspberry before replying “Walker, you’re a great person and I love you but come on!! THE Buffy Driscoll just not only spilt a pint of Coke over some random dude but she is also apologising!!! We have to savour this moment! Someone, I beg, get a camera.” “I’m on it,” Walker said reaching for his phone before screaming “you’re doing great sweetie!!” 

Which caused an abrupt burst of laughter from everyone but Buffy, who simply death stared until she couldn't hold her own laughter in anymore.

-

“I love you so much, and I am so lucky to have you in my life, you know that right?” TJ whispered into Cyrus’ ear as he hugged him tighter smiling softly to himself.

The smaller boy turned around to his boyfriend to give him a quick kiss. “I love you more, Teej, always and nothing's gonna to change that, okay? I promise.”

Cyrus always knew what to say, he was always amazing with words,  and it was like he could read minds, the others found it annoying from time to time but TJ loved it and had never been more grateful for someone. Cyrus could see those words where what he needed because TJ gave Cyrus another kiss, but longer this time, a kiss with an underlying feeling of comfort and safety, one filled with so much love. The taller boy smiled into the kiss before pulling away and jumping up to his feet.

“Come on Underdog, let's go to some of the rides pwetttyy pweasseee!” TJ was giving Cyrus those puppy dog eyes that he knew his boyfriend couldn’t resist.

“Race ya there!!” Cyrus mumbled as he perked up and started sprinting away.

“Cy, babe, you don't even know where you’re going” TJ screamed as he ran to and then very quickly caught up with the Jewish boy. When he finally reached where Cyrus was, he picked him up and spun him around. Both of the boys erupted with playful laughter. They truly were, at that moment, happy and whole. This may only be the first pride parade they have been to but both the boys could tell, it would be the best by far because nothing could beat this perfect day.

[ineffablecolors]

New Tales from the Old Forest

So this OS+sequel is officially it’s own separate verse now. 

First, thank you all so much for the enthusiasm. Second, thanks so so much to @katie-dub for keeping me motivated and for the gorgeous banner below. And, third, have a Valentine’s Days installment.

New Tales from the Old Forest; ~ 2, 300 words; FF.NET || AO3

It’s not that she’s not used to being alone on this day. She has been alone on every single February 14th for the last ten years. And the one before that, on which she wasn’t, she doesn’t like to think about. Not about the stolen bracelet that was probably a present for someone, a gesture of love and affection, meaningful in ways it wasn’t in her hands. She doesn’t like to think about the fancy restaurant in which her palms kept itching and she felt like she was sitting too straight the whole time. One of the last bills they’d ran out on but not the first by far. One of the first charity shop skirts she’d torn but not the last by far.

Emma doesn’t like to think about any of that. And she doesn’t like to think about Valentine’s Day all that much either. She doesn’t hate it – not because of missed opportunities or past sullied experiences. She doesn’t even mind the hearts and the pink and all that over-the-top jazz. What frustrates her is the unnecessary hassle – the longer queues in her favourite coffee shop, the multiple questions of whether she’d like the red velvet Valentine’s cupcake instead, of whether she’d like their 2for1, 2forLove promotion, of whether she wants her bear claw in a heart shaped box. No, no and what even?

She wouldn’t mind the day one bit, if only it would mind itself. And keep out of her face for a good, old-fashioned, grey, just-that-bit-too-chilly-to-be-bareable February day.

So no, it’s not that she’s not used to being alone and it’s not that she hates the holiday. It’s just that it’s kinda hard to completely ignore a holiday that’s all about love and romance when you’ve found yourself in a sort of… budding romance. When you can actually picture a hand holding one of the numerous roses sold on the corner before Granny’s. When you can see yourself taking out two glasses instead of just the bottle and the corkscrew. When you can just imagine putting on something cheesy and as over-the-top as everything else and tucking your feet under someone’s thigh.

When you can close your eyes and conjure up that particular shade of blue that-

“MOM!”

For a bail bonds person, the way she jumps out of her skin is an embarrassment and then some.

“Jesus fuc- Kid! Easy on the eardrums, would you?”

Henry gives her that patent look every kid knows how to give an old(er) person. That inimitable ‘are you serious? is old age getting to you?’ look. It’s not her favourite one, to be honest.

“I’ve been knocking on the window for a solid minute,” he deadpans.

Emma opens her mouth to reply but realizes the reason she was so out of it and decides to save herself any additional embarrassment. Instead she reaches over and opens the passenger door so Henry can finally get in.

“I’ll make it up to you by letting you choose dinner.”

“Can I save that for future usage?”

“Huh?”

“Miss Blanchard is throwing a Valentine’s party for all her students.”

“A Valentine’s party. For 10-year-olds,” Emma gives him her own ‘are you serious?’ look.

“It’s not so much Valentine’s as it’s fairytales and lots of Disney.”

He says it with his most mature tone, no doubt in an attempt to convince her of Miss Blanchard’s sanity but Emma can see his eyes sparkling. A fairytales party, for God’s sake.

“And I may or may not have promised to bring my book.”

She doesn’t even have to ask which book.

“Henry.“

“Killian said it’s fine!”

Of course he did. Killian will probably say it’s okay, if Henry wanted to organize the party in his house. Will probably fly the whole class to Storybrooke, Nowhere, Maine. Giving Henry his skype had been a huge mistake.

“I wonder what Regina would say,” she mutters but turns around and starts the engine anyway.

If Killian wants half the population of NY to have read his book before it even hit the bookstores, that’s his own damn business. The thing would probably be a hit regardless. And she could just imagine him telling her not to get her knickers all twisted up over it.

///

It isn’t lying per say. Miss Blanchard is organizing a fairytale party with lots of Disney binging and a NTOF reading. Was it her idea? Not precisely. Is she doing it? Yes. So Henry thinks he is on the lighter side of that particular grey area.

Plus, he thinks his mom and Killian will hardly take issue with the plan he formed almost as soon as Killian told him he planned on coming to New York for Valentine’s Day.

///

She makes it to 9:36pm when Henry texts her that Miss Blanchard invited him and a couple of other students that live far to stay over. Emma takes it as a sign from the universe. A sign saying ‘fix your hair, pour yourself a glass of red and call him’.

So she does just that. She touches up her make up as well while in front of the mirror. Checks there’s no laundry in the range of her laptop’s camera, logs into Skype and shoots Killian a quick text.

Wanna Skype?

Emma nods to herself. Good, chill, casual (to the point where she knows he might cringe). Perfect for their not-really-a-relationship-cuz-we’ve-only-seen-each-other-once-but-kind-of-a-relationship-because-we-text-every-day-(all-day)-and-skype-every-weekend.

Tomorrow perhaps?

Oh. Emma stares at her phone screen, confusion dominating her senses while reality tries to realign with her expectations.

It’s fine, of course. Perfectly fine. He is probably busy. At 10:10pm. On Valentine’s Day. It’s fine. She is not gonna think about it too hard. It’s fine.

She texts him precisely that (It’s fine.)  and goes to the bathroom to remove the day old make-up that suddenly feels like it’s suffocating her.

///

He honest-to-God bangs his head against the desk. Why is writing for Emma Swan so bloody hard?

Not writing about her. Oh, no, writing about her is Killian’s new favourite pastime. Whether he is writing her dry sense of humour into one of his more cynical characters or writing the colour of her eyes into his (undeniably poor) attempts at verse, writing Emma Swan is both exhilarating and liberating.

Writing for her is a whole different ballgame. He honestly thought that first short story had been so damn hard because he hadn’t had a clue how she’d react to receiving it. Over the last week he’s realized that it had a lot to do with not knowing how she’d react to it.

As fascinated (and absolutely smitten) as he is with Emma, there is still a hell of a lot that he doesn’t know about her. And trying to write her a bloody poem (for bloody Valentine’s Day no less) is slowly but surely giving him a case of proper anxiety.

Would she think it too cheesy? Too frivolous? Too old-fashioned? Ridiculous? Over the top? How is he to write anything, if his head is full of more question marks than words?

His phone pings again and Killian sends a silent prayer to goddamn Cupid, or whoever is on call for poor bastards like him, that it’s not Emma again because he can only exercise so much self-control when faced with the chance to see her face. Even if just on his computer.

Just about 20 hours or so and you’d get to see her in the flesh, mate. Touch her. Perhaps… kiss her.

Bloody hell. Those thoughts are worse than the doubts in his head when it comes to productivity. So whether to torture himself further or to shake himself from his daydream (is it still a day dream, if it’s night but you’re still awake?), he grabs his phone.

It’s not Emma and the mix of relief and disappointment is one of the strangest sensations he has ever experienced. And that’s saying something.

It’s Regina of all people. Texting him a picture of a huge bouquet of all things. His confusion lasts for all of three seconds before her second text comes through.

‘Happy Valentine’s, Jones. I guess gratitude is in order.’

He can just picture Regina’s face, pinched in discomfort, shooting poor Robin fiery looks at he nudges her to keep typing after every word.

And then the confusion is back.

Why the hell are they wishing me a happy holiday a day early?

His eyes fly to the little numbers above the digital clock on his phone with well-calculated dread and his stomach starts plummeting before he has even registered what he is seeing.

Tue Feb 14

14th.

“Bloody buggering fuck!”

He starts opening and logging into Skype so fast he can almost hear his laptop sputtering in indignation.

///

She is already in bed. Old pjs, hair up in a loose bun she can fall asleep in, if she so pleases, her second glass of wine on the nightstand and Donna Tart’s first novel in her hands (if it feels a bit like cheating on Killian, well, maybe she has no issue with that right now).

Speaking of which-

Her Skype suddenly comes to life with a jarring ringing which is that much more annoying and loud thanks to the quiet in her bedroom. After a lifetime of one too many neighbors complaining about the crying baby she couldn’t seem to bounce to sleep, Emma’s body seizes in discomfort from being the source of noise so close to midnight. Then she sees Killian’s face on her screen and her everything seizes for a whole different reason.

Seriously?! seems to be today’s motto.

Emma glances down to make sure there are at least no peanut butter stains on her t-shirt and then hits the green button with a frustrated sigh. However, her put-togetherness (or lack thereof) is quickly pushed to the backburner when an obviously distressed Killian Jones, if the way he is pulling at his hair is anything to go by, appears on her screen.

“Killian?”

His head snaps up so fast she can almost hear his neck pop, expression sliding from mortification into unadulterated relief in a millisecond.

“Swan,” he breathes it out in a way that already has him half way to forgiven for not humouring her earlier.

“What’s u-“

“I’m so so so sorry! Bloody hell, love, I swear I thought it was the 13th. I’ve been struggling with this… thing for the last week and I completely lost track of the whole space-time continuum. Please, forgive me, I can’t believe I ju-“

“Killian, slow down. It’s fine,” she says on a half-laugh and means it for the first time tonight.

Babbling Killian just made the top 5 of her favourite Killians.

“It is most certainly not. I cannot believe I buggered this up. I was going to come down to New York tomorrow. Today. Bloody- I’m so sorry, Swan. I didn’t want to speak to you in case I let myself slip up and-“

“Killian. It’s alright. It’s not a big deal. I just thought…” she shrugs one shoulder. “You know… wouldn’t be too bad to see your face today.”

“It’s marvelous to see your face any day, Emma. I swear I was just afraid I might-“

“Seriously, you need to stop explaining yourself. Though…”

It’s only now that his explanation actually sets in and Emma feels her insides vibrate a little at the thought of seeing him again. For the first time since… whatever it is they started doing.

“Though?” he asks and she can practically feel the anxiety radiating from her computer screen and pulls it a little closer on pure instinct, gives him a little smile, just on this side of coy and that side of reassuring.

“Well… since you had it all planned and everything, and I’m guessing you can afford to take a day off to- I mean, if you can’t, it’s fine but you said-“

“Swan,” he is the one sounding amused now and Emma realizes her gaze has dropped to her keyboard. “Please, don’t misunderstand me. I may have miscalculated but I still very much plan to see you tomorrow. Face to face.”

She swallows and watches his smile dip a little as his eyes soften.

“If you’ll allow me.”

She nods dumbly before realizing he’d probably like a proper answer.

“Ye-yeah. I think that can be arranged.”

“Wonderful!” Killian beams at her and for a minute they seem to just stare at each other, reacquainting themselves with their faces, the way only people who haven’t seen each other much but really really want to can. “I hope I didn’t wake you… If you have to go to bed-“

“No, no,” Emma hurries to reassure him, maybe embarrassingly fast, but she finds that her embarrassment tolerance rises with the hours she’s been awake. “I mean, I’m already in bed so-“

“So I can see, love.”

“Hey! You are the one who called me at-“ she checks the time on her phone only to realize it is barely past 11pm. “Whatever. You don’t get to complain.”

“Believe me, Swan, you will never hear me complain about seeing you in bed.”

She gives him her and Henry’s ‘are you serious?’ look just to bring it all full circle. It doesn’t seem to faze him much and her treacherous mind singsongs that he’ll fit right into their routine.

“Whatever. How was your day?”

[sablelab]

Roses for Valentine’s Day 1/6

DISCLAIMER:

This AU Valentine story is a complete work of fiction and as such is an entirely fabricated tale created in my imagination.  

SYNOPSIS:

Claire Beauchamp’s friend Geillis Duncan has persuaded her to have a night out on the town at a nightclub because she has been down in the dumps missing her boyfriend. Her friend is dying to meet Claire’s elusive man, and in turn Geillis introduces her to that someone special in her life, which only exacerbates her best friend’s melancholy so near to Valentine’s Day.

CHAPTER 1

 Love is missing someone whenever you're apart, but somehow feeling warm inside because you're close in heart. ~ Kay Knudsen

The two friends stepped outside into the cold night air and walked quickly down the street towards Sub Club where they were going for a night out on the town. Clutching her coat tightly around herself, Claire Beauchamp walked along the pavement deep in thought for several minutes. Her friend Geillis Duncan was chatting to herself in high spirits oblivious to the fact that Claire wasn’t returning her conversation. She looked around her at the street at people passing by, and suddenly realized that tomorrow was February 14th … Valentine’s Day… that special day for lovers, but it didn’t have the same excitement as it usually did, for she was unsure whether she would see Sam or not.

Slowing their pace, the two women looked at the store fronts as they passed them by. Almost all of them were decorated in various shades of red and white, with hearts and Cupids hung all over the place advertising the fact that Valentine’s Day was imminent. Claire did a double take when she saw a tall, red headed man heading out of one doorway holding a heart-shaped box of chocolates and a teddy bear with a red bow around its neck in his hands. He had the same height and colouring as her Jamie and she felt her heart skip a beat thinking that it was him, that is until he turned around to hail a cab and she knew that it was not.  Disappointment swept over her like a blanket of fog and she sighed.

“You okay Claire? You look like you just saw a ghost,” Geillis asked a little concerned at her friend’s pallor.

“No … No … I’m fine.  I thought I just saw somebody I knew.”

“Yeah, I noticed that guy too. Handsome devil.  Someone is a lucky woman.  Did you see what he was carrying?”

“Sorry, no I didn’t notice,” was her noncommittal answer.

She had however seen what he was carrying and it made her think about last year when she and Jamie had shared some late night macaroons for Valentine’s Day. She noticed everything, especially the couples everywhere she looked … holding hands, dining together, or just gazing adoringly into each other’s eyes. Claire sighed, feeling a little pang of longing in her heart. When she saw all these happy people her thoughts inevitably turned to the man she loved. Closing her eyes, she let herself drift into their fantasies for several seconds. They had been just like these couples, doing things they were doing tonight and enjoying each other’s company.  They walked together on the street, holding hands. They would sit in a coffee shop sipping coffee, talking together and looking into each other’s eyes. Oh, how she wished she could just feel Jamie’s arms around her now … to kiss those sensual lips of his and to drown in that perfect body and the beauty of his eyes. She missed him … she missed them … so terribly much and her friend Geillis had noticed her melancholy over the last couple of days and that’s why they were here tonight.

Opening her eyes suddenly, Claire tried in vain to erase the memories of Jamie’s touch and especially his unique scent from her mind. She wondered what he was doing and if he was missing her as much as she was missing him. He’d been working overseas for the last few months and hadn’t been able to get time away from the court case he was working on. It was dragging on longer than expected and although they’d been in contact constantly, it was not the same.  Claire tried to convince herself that it was just the fact that it was a special day tomorrow that she was feeling so down in the dumps. It was just hard to imagine being on her own for Valentine’s Day that had really seemed to strike a nerve. Her friend Geillis though, had been a godsend. Tonight, was her way of helping her get over missing her man.  

Nonetheless, Claire continued to walk slowly down the street, lost in her thoughts, until Geillis’ voice broke her from her musings. “Hey! There’s the nightclub … It’s just up ahead.  I hope you are as pumped as I am Claire?”

“I’m always thrilled when we do things together,” was Claire’s candid reply to her friend, hoping that her voice sounded much better than the way she actually felt.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Neon lights advertising the nightclub lit up the surrounds in the still night air as Claire and her bestie made their way toward the venue. Sub Club appeared to be the place to be seen for all the hip young Glaswegian clubbers who frequented this type of night life scene. The atmosphere outside the club was buzzing for a Friday night and Claire could only imagine that inside would be the same. There was a long line of patrons waiting outside on the pavement for admittance and the two women joined the queue and stood in line waiting to get in.  “Exciting hey?” Geillis exclaimed looking around at those gathered then at her friend next to her. “Yeah … I’m glad I came. It might just be the tonic I need.”

“You’ve been moping around for days Claire Beauchamp.” She exclaimed.  “I’m glad you decided to have a girl’s night out with me. It will be fun.  This place is the place to be in Glasgow any day of the week.”

“You’re right … I did need to get out.  I can’t sit at home waiting for my boyfriend to return from his work-related trip to the States.  But I do miss him so.”

“All the more reason for you to enjoy tonight. When are you expecting this mysterious man … the one I have yet to meet … home?”

“Soon, I hope. I really hope he gets back for Valentine’s Day.”

“I’m sure he will move mountains to do that. Don’t worry.  He’ll be back for that special day,” she replied encouragingly.

With a small smile Claire cast her friend a side look but inwardly her heart was breaking to think that Jamie may be held up and wouldn’t be home for Valentine’s Day tomorrow. Her friend though was full of beans tonight and Claire couldn’t help but notice that Geillis was beaming.

“What has got you so keyed up tonight?”

“Oh, I’m so excited … I so want you to meet my new guy …  He works here you know.”

“Really? So, is that why you invited me out and why we’re at this particular nightclub?”

“Maybe,” was Geillis’ coy reply before her face lit up with animation once more.  “You’re gonna love him Claire … he’s a dreamboat.”

“Sounds like you really like this one.”

“Oh, I do … I do. I think he may be the one.”

“Well, my curiosity is peaked now my friend.  I can’t wait to meet him.”

“I hope your man returns soon too Claire so that I can meet him as well.  Even though I’ve heard a lot about him, I sure do want to put that image in my head to a real face.”

Claire gave her an enigmatic smile that she hoped Geillis would accept as her response to her friend’s joy at being here tonight. Although she was happy for her buddy, at the same time she couldn’t help but feel a little envious of her happiness. She missed Jamie dreadfully and just the mention of his name sent thrills coursing down her spine. She was a little worried though because she hadn’t heard anything from him over the last few days and that made her anxious.  He always called to say how his day had been but the silence had been deafening and she couldn’t help but think the worse.  Valentine’s Day was tomorrow night and the thought of spending it alone really cut to the quick.

Lost in the personal thoughts coursing through her head and trying to shake off her reverie, Claire managed to give the impression that she was indeed happy to be here tonight for some fun.  The two women stood side as they slowly moved closer and closer to the front of the queue, waiting for their signal to enter the nightclub.

“I think the line is getting shorter, we seem to have moved up a fair bit Geillis.”

“Yeah, you’re right Claire,” her friend replied looking back at the meandering line which now stretched for nearly a block. “I’m excited. Are you excited?”

“Of course.  Thanks for bringing me tonight.  I’m sure we’ll both have a fabulous time.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Finally, it came to their turn and after being given the once over by the security people at the door, the two women made their way inside.

The club atmosphere was dark and edgy. Walking down a few steps into the nightclub, they made their way through the crowd sashaying across the floor to the beat of the music with Geillis leading the way. The nightclub was full of smoke, and light, reflected off the large mirror ball hanging from the ceiling danced across the walls. People were dancing on three different levels to pulsating live music. It had a real warehouse, rage club atmosphere this evening with wire cages and a hard-core S & M crowd in attendance. 

“Every week they have a different theme … looks like tonight is for the steadfast patrons.”

“True, it sure looks that way,” Claire replied casting her eyes around the venue. She took in the crowd gathered as well as noticing where the security guards were posted around the dance floor should she wish to leave early or if anyone became overtly obnoxious towards her. 

In the throng of the crowd, the two women got separated from each other. As Claire drew parallel with one of the couples dancing and tried to pass by; a man broke away from his partner. He stepped in front of her grabbed her hands and began to shimmy up against her gyrating to the music. He twirled Claire around the dance floor then brought her flush to his chest simulating erotic moves rotating his hips back and forth. She managed to break away just as Geillis came to her rescue, dragging her to a table situated near the band.

“You okay Claire?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Some of the guys can be jerks … you have to watch out or they’ll grab you.”

“So, I noticed.”

“Hey look … there he is! There’s my guy!” Geillis excitedly announced pointing towards the stage where a live band was playing. 

“Which one?”

“The lead Guitarist … The good looking one with the goatee beard. Isn’t he a spunk?”

“Ahhh! I see.”  “Well? What do you think?” “He’s okay I guess.” “Wait until you meet him. He’s a honey.” They ordered a drink then watched the people on the dance floor while they waited. Couples continued dancing until the band’s medley came to an end and they took a well-earned break. Taped music took over from them until the new replacement band had set up their instruments. The band members dispersed to meet up with the groupies hanging around or girlfriends who were waiting. Geillis waited for the lead guitarist to finish putting away his instrument, then she ran up to him and threw her arms around his neck and kissed him passionately oblivious to those around them. Claire watched from a distance as the two embraced once more then headed for the quiet seclusion of the table she had procured. Dragging him by the hand towards her friend Geillis gushed, “Claire … this is Dougal.” She smiled. “Hi … I’m Claire.” “Hey … Nice to meet you.”

For a lead guitarist, Claire thought he was quite shy and reserved.  He was quite tall and dark haired but she could see that he had heart eyes for her friend. Dougal had left his hand on Geillis’s back as they were introduced and she could see the reciprocated looks she too gave her man.  Taking her cue from their body language that they wanted to be alone, Claire asked, “Hey how about some more drinks? … My shout,” she offered.

“Thanks,” they said in unison but with eyes only for each other.

“Okay then … I’ll be right back.”  ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  The three friends sat at their secluded table and engaged in animated small talk in the dimly lit nightclub as they waited for the replacement band to begin their bracket. The new group finally belted out a rock tune, and the throbbing cadence of the music was so loud and pulsating that they could barely hear themselves speak.

“The music is a bit loud isn’t it?” Claire stated leaning towards Geillis.

“What?” she queried. A little louder she repeated her statement. “I said the music is a bit loud.” “Yeah … it is a bit …” Geillis replied raising her voice to make herself heard too before turning her attention back towards her beau.

Claire watched as Dougal and her friend sat with their heads close together oblivious to everything and everyone but each other. She and Jamie would do that too and Claire had to look away as she felt a tear well in her eyes.  She couldn’t let the happy couple see her sadness and shrugged off the negative melancholy with a more positive feeling of her love’s return. Claire knew he would be back but when was the question she couldn’t answer. She missed him something fierce and longed to feel his arms around her and taste the sweetness of his kisses, just as Geillis was receiving from Dougal.    

Feeling like the third wheel, Claire nonchalantly scanned the room looking from one side of the nightclub to the other. Couples were on the floor dancing to the music while others were sitting with people having drinks. She observed several young Scottish men flirting with their girlfriends and that too made her think of the banter between her and Jamie.  He would flirt with a lamp post but she always gave as good as she got as well.  They were perfect for each other and their flirting was a prelude to the foreplay that inevitably led to lovemaking. Sighing, Claire took a long swallow of her favourite whisky. She had not seen her lover for months and thought it was time she pulled herself together and got over her sadness of missing him. Tonight’s outing was why Geillis had brought her here … to reconnect with life, to have some fun and to forget her missing the love of her life.  Her friend was right. Jamie would be home for Valentine’s Day.  She just knew he wouldn’t miss this special anniversary.

When Dougal eventually turned away from his girlfriend and reached for his glass of beer, Claire engaged him in conversation while he had a sip of his beverage, taking the opportunity to find out a little more about him before the band began a new song.  

“So, Dougal … How long have you worked here?”

“Since the club opened. Why?” “I heard that a guy called Steven Cree owns Sub Club. Does he ever come here?” “Sometimes.” “Is he here tonight?” she enquired enthusiastically. “No he’s not.” “I’ve also heard he’s a very funny comedian … Is that correct?” Dougal smiled, “Yeah … you could say that. He does a stand-up comedic routine from time to time.  The patrons love him. He’s hilarious. He’s doing a gig next Saturday week I believe.”

The music had the crowd soon rocking again and Claire watched the patrons enjoying themselves dancing and moving to the beat.  The pulsating rock music went on for several more songs until the band members also took a well-earned break. When the music stopped playing all was quite except for voices in laughter and conversation as people returned to where they were sitting for a drink and a rest.

“Oops there’s my cue. Sorry girls … duty calls.”

Their conversation came to an abrupt halt as Dougal rose to leave for the band’s next bracket. Geillis gave him a sad look as she rested her hand on his arm savouring that last touch before he had to leave. Leaning down he gave her a quick hug and a kiss before returning to join his other band members on stage.

“Enjoy the night girls … See ya later babe … ‘Bye Claire, nice meeting you.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* to be continued

[simplyadorkable-blog1]

Season 6, Episode 16 - “Operation: Bobcat”

On Valentine's Day, Jess tries to convince everyone she's happy being single; Schmidt competes for a promotion; Winston's plans to propose to Aly are expedited.

Happy Valentine’s Day, roomfriends! And what a Valentine’s Day we get! Nick, Schmidt, and Winston are sitting at the dining room table when Cece runs in playing The Cupid Shuffle. Schmidt and Winston get up to join her in the dance and even Nick bobs a bit in his chair. They instantly stop when Jess gets back to the loft with the mail. Jess assures them that they don’t need to feel bad for her because she’s single, she has a fun day planned. She’s finally going to use the celebrity chef dinner she won and clean out her purse. Nick asks if there’s any mail from Raisin since she’s in Minnesota and they’re going to exchange gifts. Jess asks if he’s going to do what he did for her—a nudie card with a $20 bill stapled to it—but he says he’s actually going to put in effort. Wow, Nick, low blow. But he’s so proud of himself and humbled by love that he feels five feet tall. I’m five feet tall, Nick, and I do not feel humbled by love. Jess continues to search the mail and it’s clear that she sent herself a Valentine, so sad. But she tries her best to convince them she isn’t sad by singing and dancing to The Cupid Shuffle by herself.

Despite that enthusiastic display, Cece and Schmidt are unable to spend Valentine’s Day together. Schmidt has been killing himself to impress his boss, Kim, so they don’t have time to celebrate the first time they made love. Or as Schmidt calls it, their “bone-iversary.” In the living room, Winston plops down next to Jess while she’s cleaning out her purse. He’s really overdoing his interest so Jess tells him to go do something with Aly. Winston says she’s not big on V-Day. He also fills us in that he’s only on phase six of his 21-phase plan. He’s still months away from proposing and not under budget, by thousands of dollars. What the hell is he doing that costs that much? Jess tells him to go do something for Aly anyways and she is left alone to sort through her frozen yogurt cards. She has to start going to the same place, or else she’ll never get a free one!

At the bar, Nick reveals his romantic Valentine’s plan to Cece. It’s actually really sweet and involves copious amounts of roses being sent to Raisin. Cece is proud of Nick and names him “Big Boy Cupid.” When Nick asks what she’s doing for the day she admits that Schmidt didn’t have time to plan anything for their bone-iversary. Nick encourages her to just take the situation into her own hands and plan something herself. But he does tell her her top is terrible and that she needs to add sparkles. Sparkles are in!

Meanwhile Winston and Aly are having a cute meal at her house. Winston presents her with a koala, “I thought it would be nice to spend some koala-ty time together. G’day mate. What’s a fit Sheila like you doing with this sticky joey?” Thank goodness for closed captioning. They continue to be super cute together and we all grin widely at our screens at home. They are so cute that even they can’t handle it and Aly spontaneously proposes. Since Winston is in the beginning phases of his own proposal plan, he panics and answers, “Nah…”

Back at the loft, he fills in Jess, informing her he’s going to compromise on his dream and accept her proposal. She tells him he deserves an amazing engagement, he’s America’s sweetheart for goodness sake! She encourages him to expedite his proposal plan and pop the question right away since Aly is probably worried about their relationship. “Tell your son of a bitch cat of yours that he’s gonna get a new mommy, cause we’re going to propose tonight!” It’s amazing how quickly Winston’s proposal has turned into Winston and Jess’ proposal.

The pair sit down with Winston’s binder of phases, and Jess starts tearing out unnecessary phases including erotic skywriting, a special performance by the LA Children’s Choir, purchasing the ring in Atlanta—though it is America’s more affordable big city—and Operation: Bobcat. Before Jess can tear out that last page, Winston interjects to convince Jess to keep it, “When Aly and I were first partners we got called to break up a drug deal in a bus station bathroom. When we got there, wasn’t nobody in there. Just a bobcat. Like, a bobcat running around. I shrieked. Of course, I was afraid for my life. But Aly—she just laughed. Laughed and laughed and laughed. And, you know, it was that moment that made me realize I wanted to make her laugh for the rest of her life. And so, the plan was to recreate that moment.” Jess acquiesces, knowing that Winston already bought a bobcat costume before he got a ring because he really toes the line between sweetness and insanity. Winston must have purchased the costume last episode when he was at the costume shop. He is really married to this idea!

Schmidt heads to his office at Associated Strategies to grab hard copies for Kim. When he opens his door he sees Cece laying on his desk. He panics and slips in, trying his best to hide that his wife is in his office. Cece explains that she brought their bone-iversary to him and he tells her that he doesn’t have much time so he’s going to stay dressed and poke out like a cuckoo clock. Have fun trying to erase that image from your eyeballs. Cece turns down that sexy offer, informing him that she has it all planned on the roof. On the roof, Cece has lights strung up and a large blanket set down for them. Before they can make any moves a sudden gust of wind blows their clothes off the roof. What is it with these two getting stuck naked places?

At the loft, Jess and Winston are talking to her ring guy, while she trims his hair and he tries to negotiate a price. It’s hard to pay attention to anything that Trevlo says other than, “Stay blessed.” Stay blessed. Jess briefly explains to Winston that she knows Trevlo from when she rear-ended him in parking lot and he gave her his card. Stay blessed. Winston, growing frustrated, lashes out at Jess for messing up his fade, “I look like if Lebron James turned around!” He’s clearly stressing out about the proposal. Nick interrupts his breakdown by entering the room and greeting Trevlo—he was in the car when Jess hit him. Stay blessed. Nick tells the pair he has to go help Schmidt and Cece because he’s now “Big Boy Cupid” and he’s in love. Winston catches a look of sadness wash over Jess’ face. After Nick exits, Winston tells Jess that the proposal is off. He thinks he’s being a bad friend because he saw her face when Nick said he was in love. He tells her she’s sad and to “stay blessed.”

Nick quickly hauls over to rescue Schmidt and Cece, but not before jumping around behind a reporter to get on the news. Unfortunately, he brought Schmidt’s giant suit from college graduation and Cece’s wedding dress. Classic Nick, he didn’t even notice it was her wedding dress, but at least knew it looked familiar, he just didn’t realize that was because he was at their wedding. Before the couple can further chastise Nick, Kim comes out onto the roof and begins crying. Thankfully she can’t see them over one of the vents. “This is the start of a very long cry. As a bartender, you really get to know the human cry… So what else is going on with you guys?” Queue Schmidt/Cece synchronized eyeroll.

Since Winston bailed on the proposal, Jess decides to use her celebrity chef dinner alone. She sits at the table while Gordon Ramsay prepares scallops and tells her she’s sad. Upon further questioning, she admits that she’s just mad that Nick decided to finally be a great boyfriend and she never got to experience that side of Nick. I beg to differ. She also feels bad that Winston cancelled his proposal because of her. Ramsay tells her to do something about it so she calls Winston to tell him that she’s going to help him.

Schmidt and Cece somehow manage to get dressed without Kim noticing, but are unable to escape. Nick offers to handle it, but Schmidt points out that he wouldn’t be able to explain his sudden presence without giving them away. “I work here and I’m a window washer and I finally got to the top floor,” and “I’m a traffic guy and I fell out of the news chopper,” just won’t do. Cece takes responsibility for their situation, apologizing to Schmidt. But he tells her that she means more to him than any job ever will, shouting “I love Cece!” loud enough for Kim to hear. Cece follows up with an “I love Schmidt!” before Kim storms over to confront them. Nick, unprompted, pretends he’s a chimney sweep, gives up, and asks Kim if she’s crying. We gloss over her saying she just met her birth mother because she asks Schmidt why he’s dressed like a Little Rascal and that description is too spot-on to ignore. Schmidt explains what’s going on and he would understand if he got fired, but Kim appreciates the honesty and tells him she’s noticed him working his ass off.

Now it’s time for the sweetest scene in the entire episode. Jess shows Winston the public bathroom where she strung up lights and negotiated the ring price down for him. She also called the station and they are sending Aly down on a public disturbance call. Winston thanks Jess for her help in the most Winston way possible, “If I didn’t propose in a public bathroom wearing a bobcat costume I would have regretted it for the rest of my life.” They hear Aly coming so Jess hides, turning off the lights, and Winston puts his bobcat head on. Aly enters the bathroom and calls out, searching for the reason for the call. Winston suddenly jumps out of a stall and ends up getting kicked into a wall.

Jess and Aly rush to Winston’s aid, but he definitely has a concussion. Aly asks what’s going on and Jess turns on the lights. She’s very confused and Winston pulls out a paper to begin reading his speech, but has to have Jess take over because his vision is blurry. Jess begins, prompts the police choir, Protect & Swerve, to enter and begin singing Alison. They’re actually pretty damn good. Jess reads, “Aly, I’m in love with you. I love your face, your mind, and your butt. As a young black man, I never thought I’d feel safe with a police officer. When I met you, I threw away all my shoes cause they made me feel like I was walking on air. You’re the most amazing woman I’ve ever met and I have something to ask you. But first, I’m gonna describe in vivid detail our first sexual encounter.” She cuts herself off and skips ahead. “I have a complicated relationship with God. No.” She skips again. “I don’t think anyone on Earth gets to feel as proud as I do just to call you my partner. And now I want to ask you to be my partner for the rest of my life.” She can barely get out that last part between her tears. Aly can’t understand what she’s saying so Winston takes it from there. “I want you to be my partner for the rest of my life. Officer Nelson, will you marry me?” “Of course I will, Officer Bishop.” She answers and they kiss and we all pause our televisions to wipe our tears.

Back at Associated Strategies, Schmidt shows Cece his new office complete with tickets to something called the Clippers and an automatic door close button, a la Parks and Rec. Schmidt tells Cece he got the promotion and the two can finally celebrate their anniversary in peace. At least I assume that’s what they do because we are shifted back to the loft where Jess finds Nick in his room. Nick tells Jess that his gift from Raisin finally got there and it was a necklace. He clearly didn’t want a necklace and is disappointed. The episode wraps up with a small Jess and Nick moment—“Happy Valentine’s Day, Jess.” “Happy Valentine’s Day, Miller.” Sorry, I have to wipe my tears again—and then they all gather in the living room to toast Winston and Aly.

Originally Aired 2/14/2017