#i was gonna draw some of their scared/scary expressions too but. got sleepy. be seeing u

[livvy-art]

finished watching my best friend play this game and wanted to sketch some of my fav siffrin faces. i tried to do them justice!

[friendlylocalwhumper]

“There you go, darling. Breathe. In and out.”

Lux tries to curl in on himself, whining when he’s pulled to sit up and a hand presses against his sternum to keep him upright. He’s pulled into someone’s lap, his back held up against a broad chest, and the familiar smell of the Hunter somehow registers among the suffocating metallic stench of blood. Lux’s weak choking sounds become actual coughs again, blood spilling from his lips.

“Good boy,” The Hunter says approvingly, rubbing his chest, and Lux shudders. He wants Emory back, doesn’t want to be in the Hunter’s lap again, to die with obedient thoughts in his head.

But fingers wind into his hair to keep his head up, and a glass of water is tipped to his lips, and his horror is replaced for a moment by stunned gratitude. The taste of blood washes away if only for a second, and he can swallow again, and breathing becomes a manageable task again.

“Tha-ank you,” The warlock rasps. He tries to tip his head back onto the Hunter’s shoulder, too tired to do anything but flop, but the grip on his curls tightens.

“You’ll choke if you do that,” His old captor explains, and Lux whines. He gets so whiny when he’s pliable under the Hunter’s hands, because it’s so scary, and he just wants Emory, wants to be away from hands that twist and crush and punish.

“Ple-, -ease, heal m-me.” Blood bubbles up in his throat, thick and dense. As soon as he starts to choke on it, he’s dipped forward, his chest pressed against, and with the help of gravity he coughs it up. He’s pulled back up to lean against the Hunter, dizzy and gasping.

“I can’t, little one. The poison affects me too. Damn feds didn’t tell me… but I wasn’t born with magic like you were, I’m not disgusting and wrong like you.” The Hunter’s hand comes up to Lux’s throat in a threat to cut off his air manually if he fails to earn mercy with obedience. Lux’s eyes flutter and his stomach twists at the disgust, the assertion of his wrongness that sounds so true. Even if Lux could be healed, he wouldn’t deserve it.

“They’re killing warlocks, just like I do,” The Hunter continues with a thrill of joy at Lux’s staggered, reedy breaths. “But I can’t let you die, my light. You’re my little warlock, my favorite. I’ll keep you breathing one way or another.”

Lux frowns as he tries to tip his head up to escape the hand around his throat. Why choke him when he can just be left to choke on his own blood? The Hunter is scared of him dying, wants to save him, but he won’t be able to counteract poison with will alone. Lux is still going to die.

“I-I don’t want, want you t’have me,” The warlock whimpers. “I, wanna, hhhh, die alone. Le-eave me alone.”

The Hunter is about to grip tighter and cut off his air, he knows; the hand in his hair has already twisted to make him gasp, and he can feel the Hunter’s muscles coil up in his fury. But more blood bubbles up in his throat, and this time it feels like he’s clogged all the way from his lungs to his tongue, and shudders turn into involuntary, full-body struggling. He can’t breathe. All the maneuvering that might help him breathe a bit longer, the borrowed time, it’s all used up. Lux can feel himself being bent forward to try and let gravity do the work again, can feel hands on his chest and throat, but the blood stays, and air doesn’t come. His lungs burn, his throat aches, he’s scared, so scared… but the darkness swarming around his vision and numbing his body? It’s kind of comforting. The Hunter’s hands are on him, and the big, confident, controlling man can’t do a thing to save his precious little light, to force Lux to stay with him. It feels good to die in an act of rebellion, to know he can’t back out of this and beg and be called good. He’s bad, and he’s proud of it.

~

Emory is heaving air into his stinging lungs by the time that he gets to Cole’s family’s house. The roads were clogged with cars and ambulances and cop cruisers, people trying to drag bleeding, suffocating warlocks to hospitals and police stations and dumpsters and alleys. But Lux said save Cole, not try to save every half-dead warlock you see along the way. So he ran past it all.

He slams through the door, wheezes his way down the hall, clutching at his chest. The door painted blue with white trim, little clouds on it where Lux painted them with Cole on one of Cole’s sad angry days, it’s left ajar.

Emory pushes it open to see a cop sitting on the bed, hand to Cole’s forehead. The black boy freezes and stares; Colten is alive, but clearly was poisoned like all the other warlocks. The cop isn’t dragging the little boy out of bed, just watching over him.

Coleten looks up at Emory, taking a second to focus, and in a little cracking voice, he asks, “Lux?”

The cop looks up sharply. He seems disappointed to see someone other than Lux. At the name on his uniform, Holt, Emory sighs. Just the only cop Lux has ever expressed that he trusted - Grant.

“Lux isn’t here, I’m sorry, Cole,” Emory says gently, walking in. “Grant… how is he breathing?”

The officer holds up a glass vial, half-empty. “The cure. Antidote. Standard for officers to be given it, give a dose to a warlock before bringing them in. Supposed to keep as many alive as possible, if they comply. I stole extras.”

Emory could faint. A cure. “And Cole? Why’d you start with him? How do you even know him?” Emory kneels beside the bed, checking on Colten’s temperature himself. Not nearly as hot as Lux. If the little boy looked any more stable, Emory would grab Grant and drag him out to bring him to Lux.

“Well, Lux gave me this address, described Cole. Months ago. Promised to kill me if I let anything happen to the kid. If something like this happened, I swore to come help Cole first.”

“Sounds like Lux.” Emory smiles at Colten, who looks downright miserable. He wonders if the boy’s mom and dad are here, if they’re alive.

“Is Lux okay?” The boy squeaks, cheeks still flushed from the fever.

“No. I need to borrow Officer Grant here to come make Lux better. You wanna come with, Cole? I’ll carry you, make sure you have an adult nearby. You can sleep on our couch until you feel up for some chicken noodle soup.”

At the boy’s sleepy nod, Emory scoops him up carefully, and Grant tucks the vial into his pocket. “More in the car,” He explains briefly, then leads the way out to his cruiser.

~

“It’s okay, Cole, you sit right here, I’m gonna go check on-“

“Who the hell are you?”

Emory startles and looks over toward the bedroom at Grant’s exclamation. Lux should be in there, only Lux.

“Stay right here, Colten,” Instructs Emory quietly. He stands and walks over to the bedroom, starkly aware that he has no weapon and no magic. Grant has to take care of the situation if there’s any threat.

The Hunter. He’s sitting in the bed, holding Lux, looking up at Grant. “What, you’re here to arrest a dead warlock?” The torturer asks, voice rough with anger. He sees Emory and his grip tightens around Lux’s chest. There’s no movement from Lux, not a flinch, not a breath.

“He’s got the cure,” Emory informs, tipping his head toward the cop beside him. He takes a shuddering breath, furious and hardly containing himself, before he adds, “Let go of Lux so I can hold him. If you want to kill me for it after, you can, but he’s not gonna wake up to you.”

The Hunter’s eyes flick to the vial in Grant’s hand, and he lets Lux flop limply onto the mattress, standing away from the bed. “He’s no fun dead,” The torturer comments, and the genuine worry, the fear, can’t be hidden behind the cruel words. Emory doesn’t care what the mindfucker feels as he brushes past and climbs onto the bed to pull Lux into his lap, sit him up, hold him. Lux isn’t cold, but he’s not breathing. If he was too far gone to be saved, he thinks the Hunter would have slaughtered half the town in retribution, so he has to hope that the man’s willingness to step aside is a good sign.

Grant’s hands are steady as he injects the solution into Lux’s arm. Emory can’t breathe as he waits for any sign of life from his boyfriend.

“I could help if I had my magic,” The Hunter contributes from the sidelines. “Give me that antidote. My magic will recover quickly. I’ll help him take his first breath. Or watch him die, I guess - he’s close.”

“Give it to him,” Emory growls, tucking his cheek against Lux’s. This can’t be the last hug he gives his Curls.

The Hunter flexes his magic as soon as he can, a rush of energy filling the room. Emory holds Lux as tight as he can when the mindfucker sits on the bed to face Lux, placing his hands on the warlock’s chest.

Magic is pressed into Lux, something shifting inside. “Vanishing the blood,” The Hunter explains as he concentrates. “From his lungs. Breathe, little one, breathe for me.”

Emory is too busy listening with his fingertips and forearms and cheek pressed against Lux for a breath, a cough, a heartbeat. Lux jolts, and shudders, and then draws a deep, ragged breath. A raw sob tears out of him as he chokes down air, hands coming up to weakly pull at Emory’s arms around him; he whines, shakes, struggles to breathe, blinded by tears.

“Lux, Lux! Honey, it’s okay, I’ve got you. I can’t let go, I’m so sorry, I need to hold on.” The Hunter is too close, Emory can’t let Lux be yanked away and dragged off to be hurt. “Curls, it’s me, I’m right here, you’re okay. I love you, I love you, it’s okay.”

The panicked sounds dissolve into whimpers in between jagged gasps. Emory can tell when Lux opens his eyes and blinks away the tears to see the Hunter, because his boyfriend jerks and tries to shove himself backward, pulling at Emory’s arms now to pull them tighter around himself.

No more blood drips onto Emory’s arms, and that’s a blessing.

“Welcome back, sweet one,” The mindfucker grins, and Emory’s had it.

“Grant, put your gun to that fucker’s head and make him leave.”

The Hunter laughs, deep and warm; Lux trembles like the sound vibrates straight through him and grates against his bones. “I’ll leave. Let my light recover. I’ll check in on him later.” The man tries to tap a finger to Lux’s temple in a promise to invade his mind later, but Emory knocks the hand away. The mindfucker’s eyes go to Emory in silent annoyance.

“Cole,” Lux chokes out, and Emory notices the boy standing in the doorway, pale as a ghost and looking like he’s staring up at his worst nightmare. The Hunter turns and stands, taking a step toward him in interest; Grant grabs Colten under the arms and hauls him up, holding him away from the Hunter.

“D-don’t, don’t,” Sobs Lux. Emory doesn’t think Lux even knows his magic is crackling against his arms, recovering enough to be used. It doesn’t occur to him to use it.

The Hunter smiles at Cole, who clings to the cop holding him. “Don’t worry, my light. I won’t take him again. Not without you, at least! You are so sweet when you have someone to protect, so obedient.”

“Ple-ease…” Lux’s begging subsides as Emory shushes him gently, rubs his arms and stomach over his sweaty shirt to soothe him. The Hunter steps away from Colten.

“Just go so he can rest.” Grant meets the Hunter’s eyes as he tucks Colten’s face to his shoulder so he doesn’t have to see the man that scares him so badly. “You probably kept him alive long enough so we could save him. He’ll remember that.” It hurts, sometimes, catering to both sides.

“Yes, he will.” The mindfucker looks fondly over to his favorite warlock, then sighs. He turns to leave. “Watch his breathing,” He offers as parting words, then walks out. The front door closes after a few tense moments.

Colten pushes against Grant’s chest until he’s put down, and Lux stiffly pries himself from Emory’s embrace. “C’mere,” He says to the youngest, patting the bed and opening his arms for a hug. Cole climbs up onto the bed and buries himself into his friend, mumbling incoherent words against Lux’s chest. The little boy doesn’t mind the blood staining the shirt, or his friend’s skin; he never has.

“Did you bring Officer Grant and Emory here, Cole?” Lux asks, tone light as he ruffles Colten’s hair. “Did you save me?”

“N-no,” The boy bemoans sadly. “I’m, I’m sick. Emory carried me.”

“You carried Emory?” Lux squeezes Cole’s upper arm gently. “Your muscles, oh, they got so big! How’d you do that?”

“Stop,” Whines Cole, tucking himself closer. Lux rubs his back and stops teasing him, quits poking fun.

“You two should lie down and rest.” Emory guides them to lean over and lie on their sides, pulling the blanket over them. Cole stays huddled up against Lux. “I’m gonna watch over you, okay? And Grant is gonna go help other warlocks.”

“I could use some help,” The cop interrupts. “Save twice as many.”

Emory hesitates, then rubs Lux’s shoulder over the covers. “Okay. Lux, honey? You okay being alone, watching out for Cole?”

“Yeah,” Lux answers, scrunching his shoulder up by his ear. He doesn’t want to be alone, he’s scared and exhausted and hurting, but there are people dying just like he was, and they need Emory more right now. “I’ll protect Cole.”

“I’ll be back soon, okay, Curls? ‘kay, Cole?” Emory pats Colten’s shoulder, frowning at the flinch. Lux knows better than anyone what Cole needs, what will help with that.

“Em, sa-, save my friends,” Lux whispers, guilty for asking. “An-, Anders first. Resistance leaders. Then, hhnnn, Alex, and Kiara and Eli and, nnnh, and then, kids in safehouses.”

“I will.” Emory leans down to press a kiss to Lux’s cheek. He knows how hard that was for Lux to ask, to put the lives of his friends above those of strangers who don’t deserve to die.

Emory will take on that guilt. If he’s too late, if people die before he gets to them, he’ll take that on himself. Lux has suffered enough for one day.

[hopeishappinessff]

Holding Onto Hope: Chapter 26

Hope

I lay snuggled against Chris’s chest as he sat on my bed with his back against the wall and his legs spread wide to accommodate me. We were supposed to be watching some movie on Netflix on the large screen of the smart tv on the other side of the room, but I was entirely too focused on trying not to slip into a quiet slumber with the way Chris gently massaged the tips of his fingers against my scalp. It’d been nearly a week since we got back from Thanksgiving break and I was surprised to say the least when we got back to school and he made more than an effort to constantly spend time with me. It was almost overkill how much we hung out together, but he didn’t seem to mind and because of that… neither did I. Like today for instance, even after I told him that Destani and I had invited Angel and Cammie over for some girl time to catch up after the break, he still insisted that he come over to “chill” with us because he missed me… even though we’d just spent an entire week together at my dad’s. I didn’t argue though… I simply made sure to answer the door when he came knocking with Taylor right behind him.

“Shit! What the fuck ya’ll niggas got us watching?” Cammie squealed from her seat beside Chris and I on the small bed. She was wrapped up in one of my fluffy blankets and she had created a small fort around herself and still kept a pillow in her lap to cover her eyes when necessary.

“Bruh, this shit ain’t even scary… what you jumping for?” Taylor laughed from his strewn position on Destani’s bed. He was lying flat on his stomach facing the tv and Destani sat up against the wall with her legs tossed lazily over his butt with her own small fort formed around her and yes… a pillow smashed right up against her face.

“Tuh, not scary… babe did you not see this old lady hop all in front of the camera like that? Like how did she even know that shit was there?” Destani said as she continued to press the pillow against her face. “Got damn I don’t know, but gimme a pillow puta… this movie is outta line right now!” Angel fussed from where she sat perched up against Destani’s bed on the floor. Ever since the very first time they’d visited our room, she’d taken some strange liking to the shag hipster rug near the side of Destani’s bed and she insisted on laying on it through the duration of the movie. Barely peaking over the side of her own pillow, Destani snatched one up from the head of her bed and tossed it down right on the top of Angel’s head which turned out perfect for her because she simply tugged it down over her head.

I could feel the vibration of Chris’s raspy laughter, but again it was a struggle for me to even keep my eyes open so I ignored it and kept my face snuggled against his firm chest.

“You scared too lil bitty?” He mumbled with his lips pressed against the top of my head.

“Huh?” I muttered, briefly snatching my eyes open in an effort to understand what he’d just said. He flexed his chest out a bit and I could feel him looking down at me, but I simply clung onto the sides of his shirt like a child and weaseled around into a more suitable position.

“Are you even watching the movie girl?” He asked quietly.

“No… I’m sleepy.”

He laughed softly again and a short tingle shot from my scalp to my toes as he slithered his fingertips along the span of my back “You weren’t sleepy when I got here. Don’t fall asleep on me now babe… wake up.”

“What are we even watching?” I asked in a sleep laden voice.

“The Visit.”

“Ugh, why?” I pushed myself up from him and with a yawn, ran a hand through my unruly hair.

“Because…” His voice trailed off and I glanced over at him to see him watching me as he nibbled into the corner of his bottom lip.

With a playful roll of my eyes, I made a move to get completely off the bed only to be stopped by the feeling of him tugging me back to him.

“Where you going?” He asked.

“Now I have to pee.” Politely snatching away from him, I finally made my way off the bed and moved toward the bathroom. I wasn’t sure if he thought I was tricking him and moving away to sit somewhere else or what, but his stare never left me and I could feel it burning into me until I was around the corner and locked away in the small restroom. After handling my business and quietly sitting there for a moment attempting to overcome my sudden fatigue, I finally finished up and reached to pull the door open only to flinch and jump back about a foot when I spotted Chris perched up on the cramped counter space right outside the bathroom door.

“Gosh, you scared me… what are you doing?” I asked breathlessly with a hand pressed against my heaving chest.

“Waiting for you.” He mumbled.

“You couldn’t have waited right where you were on the bed?”

He shook his head abruptly and quickly swiped his tongue out over his lips “It’s too crowded over there.”

With a shake of my head, I ignored him momentarily as I made my way to the sink to wash my hands. Of course the entire time I did so, I could feel his golden eyed stare on me.

“You know I hate when you stare at me like that.” I mumbled, not bothering to lift my gaze from the towel I used to dry my hands with.

“And you know I can’t help it.” As soon as I finished drying my hands, he had a hand wrapped loosely around my left arm and he tugged me over until I was wedged comfortably between his parted legs. He lowered one hand to rest at my side while he slithered the other through my hair, tugging it back slightly so I could look up at him.

“You think they’ll notice if we…” “No Chris, not with all our friends right around this corner.” I fussed before he could even finish his question, practically snatching my head right out of his grasp. He only chuckled softly, but caught my head and pulled me right back to him… this time quickly latching his plump lips against the side of my neck. I gasped aloud before I could catch myself and gripped onto his thighs as he kept his lips hooked on my neck and swirled his hot tongue against my skin. The hand that he had planted against my side continued to pull me closer to him than I thought possible and soon, I could feel the most prominent erection pressed against my stomach.

“Mmm, what are you doing?” I moaned softly.

“You feel that shit?” He groaned as he slithered his lips around to the other side of my neck, “That’s all you baby.”

“What is wrong with you?” I whispered.

“You do this to me. I can’t help it.” He said. Sure the last time we’d done anything sexual had been a week ago when we got caught at my dad’s, but I figured what we’d done in that basement was enough to hold him over. It’s like I couldn’t even be in the same room as him without some type of sexual tension building between the two of us. I didn’t even have time to respond back to him… he’d already moved up past the front of my neck and latched his moist lips onto mine, leaving me to moan right into his mouth. He kissed me slow, gripping onto the side of my neck and barely rotating his head from side to side as though truly trying to appreciate every second he kept his lips against mine. I held onto the front of his shirt with one hand and continued to grip his thigh with the other, all while silently praying that I wouldn’t moan out too loud and draw any attention to us.

We kissed for what felt like forever and the air around us seemed to get hotter the more he touched me… and boy were his hands roaming. He had a firm grip on my left breast at this point and I was sure it was his hand that’d become entangled in the hair at the nape of my neck… so I didn’t immediately recognize the sensation of another hand palming my butt. It wasn’t until I felt warm air against the back of my neck that I realized Chris clearly wasn’t the only one fondling me, so I quickly snatched away from him and swiftly swung around to find Cammie only a few inches away from me with the slyest smirk on her face.

“Cammie, what are you doing?” I whispered harshly. I definitely didn’t intend on drawing any attention to this situation.

“I’m just tryna get my lil feel in too.” She giggled, stretching a hand out once again to grip my butt. Reflexively, I slapped her hand away from me and turned completely so that my back was to Chris and I was fully facing her.

“What do you mean get your feel in?” I asked, unsure of whether this girl was joking or not.

“Ya’ll just looked like you were having fun and I wanted to join in again.” The smirk hadn’t left her face and the horror-stricken expression hadn’t left mine. Again? What did she mean again?

“I told you.” Chris had leaned in close to the side of my face and he whispered in my ear just loud enough for me to hear. My eyes instinctively rolled at the thought of what he had indeed tried to explain to me about our last “encounter” with Cammie, but even standing in the girl’s presence with her attempting to fondle me I was going to continue to deny it. I refused to believe that I had done anything sexual at all with my friend… my girl friend.

“Listen, Cammie… I really don’t know what you’re talking about. But I’m not, really… into that.”

She chortled softly through her nose as her eyes danced over my frame and she crossed her arms up over her chest.

“Into what?” She asked, “Fucking other girls? Because if my memory serves me correctly, you’ve pretty much already done that.”

Chris snorted behind me and by the time I swung around to glare at him, he’d already slapped a closed fist up over his mouth and his face was obviously red from fighting back his laughter. I could feel the heat rising in my own cheeks at this point and I almost regretted turning back to face her... she was about to call me right out and I was not ready for that.

“Look love, I kinda already figured you out at this point. I’m not gonna lie and say I didn’t have a little hope that I could have my way with you, because truthfully I’m really attracted to you. But obviously,” She paused to cut her eyes over at Chris then bit into her bottom lip as her eyes dropped to his right hand which was hooked protectively to my hip, “I can’t always have my way.”

I had no clue what to say at this point. From the moment I met Cammie, I’d always considered her a friend and a close friend at that. Sure I had my suspicions about her when we met, but I chose not to outright judge her and I brushed my assumptions off. I was left almost speechless from her brashness and for a while I really didn’t know how to respond to her.

“Cammie… are… are you gay?” I asked quietly, subtly gripping onto Chris’s knee. She stared at me for a moment and thoughtlessly swept her pierced tongue out over her lips then she dropped her head and giggled.

“I don’t like to consider myself gay. I think of it more as… exploring my options, I guess. I don’t know… I’m attracted to men, but I just have my preference.” She explained calmly. Though I was almost completely sure of it before, hearing it from her mouth directly still caught me off guard and my brows shot up momentarily with shock before I quickly regained my composure.

“So you prefer women?” Chris chimed in, nearly making me flinch because I almost forgot he was even behind me. Cocking her head to one side, she swept her gaze over to him almost lustfully and I realized I couldn’t even be mad at her for looking at my boyfriend in such a way right in front of me… I’d already learned that Cammie’s personality was that of a natural seductress and she simply couldn’t help it. Not to mention her squinted and slanted eyes and constantly smirking, pouty pink lips kind of made her look like she was literally always flirting.

“Primarily.” She answered with ease.

“Nice.” He muttered.

“But I’m sorry for, you know… coming onto you or whatever,” She sighed through her nose, slithered her tongue out over her lips once more, and switched her weight to one leg with her arms still crossed over her chest, “I think you’re very beautiful, but I’ll just continue to live with the memory of the one night we did get to share… it really was amazing. But I promise not to try to touch anymore… unless you want me to.”

In some weird and awkward way, she made me feel a bit more at ease about her now exposed sexuality. It just felt nice to not have to assume anymore and though I knew it would take some time to get adjusted to the thought of her being attracted to me, at least she’d put it out on the table that she was interested and I’d made it very clear that I was not.

“But I have to tell you… I don’t know that I’ve ever experienced a couple quite as freaky as you two. And I certainly don’t know no bitch who can squirt like a got damn fire hydrant like you Sy. I was hoping I could see that one last time…”

“We can make that happen!” Chris blurted, prompting me to nudge my elbow into his stomach and playfully roll my eyes.

“Cammie…”

“I know, I know...” She giggled, “A girl can only dream right?”

   Chris

“So, how was your Thanksgiving break?” Dr. Yates asked with that infamous warm smile on her face.

“It was good… really good actually. How was yours?” I asked as I leaned back in my good ole lounge seat across from her desk.

She stared at me for a moment, as if shocked that I was actually openly engaging in a conversation with her, then blinked a few times with that smile still on her face “It was very well, thank you for asking. But tell me about yours… what was good about it?”

I quickly noted that she hadn’t opened up her notebook yet, so perhaps she genuinely wanted to know how my break went.

“Well, I got to spend some much needed time with my family and friends… that was great. I got to see my son,” I said, instantly smiling from ear to ear as I thought back to Jaylen’s bright and beautiful little face, “I didn’t wanna let him go… he’s literally like, the best baby ever.” She laughed softly and tilted her head curiously “That’s great. How’s that little handsome guy doing?”

“He’s doing really great. He barely cried the entire time… he’s such a good boy.”

“Aww, it sounds like someone is head over heels for their little one. That’s wonderful Christopher… he sounds like an absolute delight.” She beamed.

“Yeah, he is…” My voice trailed off and so did my attention as I sat there reminiscing on the short time I got to spend with Jay. I missed him, I definitely couldn’t deny that. Besides Hope, he was really the only other person who could bring me an extended peace of mind. Having the both of them together for a whole week was like the fuel I needed going back to school and now I could proudly say I hadn’t even come close to having any incidents in the near week we’d been back at school.

“Was Hope with you during the break?” She asked.

“Yeah, she was there… along with her aunt. We were all at her dad’s house.”

“And what was that like?” She was opening the little notebook now and I stared at it as she smoothly slid a drawer open on her desk to retrieve a pen. I was almost beginning to resent that thing. It held some of my deepest and darkest secrets and I always knew the moment she pulled it out, she was preparing to force me to dig even deeper into my mind and soul which was something I wasn’t used to.

“It was nice, but it didn’t start out that way.” I mumbled, barely loud enough for her to hear.

“Why do you say that?”

“She was upset with me before the break… really upset… and I actually thought she’d broken up with me.”

“What happened that would make her upset enough to have you under the assumption that she’d broken up with you?” She asked, scribbling occasionally in the book.

“I got in an altercation and it pissed her off…” My voice trailed off again because this was one of those moments where I didn’t really know if I wanted to share specific details with her out of fear of her snitching to the authorities on my ass.

“Yes, I am aware of the altercation,” She said, not even bothering to stop writing, “May I ask why?”

I stared at her for a moment, completely stunned that she was already well aware of my fuck up.

“Um… I…” Pausing briefly, I released a sigh and dropped my gaze away from her, “Well I was at a club for one of my teammate’s birthday and at the time, Hope and I weren’t really talking because of what we talked about in my last session.” She nodded in understanding, which I was grateful for because I did not wanna have to go into detail to make her remember that dreadful ass day.

“So we showed up separately and when I got there, I noticed that she was with my roommate… the one who I’d already gotten into a brief confrontation with about her. He was drunk, I could tell, but I guess she couldn’t. I sat back and watched them go out to the dance floor and she didn’t seem comfortable with him… at all. He was very touchy feely with her and she looked honestly uncomfortable, so before I could think to stop myself… I pounced on him.”

Slowly sitting back in her chair with her elbows lifted onto the armrests of her leather chair, she crossed her hands together beneath her chin and stared at me long and hard.

“You pounced on him?” She repeated softly. I only nodded and kept my head down because I was too embarrassed to look her in the eye as I confessed to what I’d done.

“The prescriptions I’d written for you… were you utilizing the medication at the time?”

“Yes…”

I glanced up at her and for the first time since I’d started my sessions with her, I saw a hint of shock on her face. I wasn’t sure why, but it’s as if she was surprised by what I’d said. She quickly regained her composure and within the blink of an eye her poised demeanor was right back in place.

“Well, I believe I owe you an explanation as to why I was already partially informed of this incident. I am in constant communication with your basketball coach, as you may already know, and I am required to provide him with reports of your progress throughout our sessions. Everything remains confidential and by law he is not permitted to have access to your file. However, I must provide him overall prognosis on your progression… and he has agreed to provide me with your progression there on the court, as that is indeed an environment that induces nearly all of your emotions.”

Well do you keep in contact with Hope and keep secret cameras in my room too… shit! I thought to myself.

“You may feel as though this is an intrusion on your life in some way, but I assure you Christopher… that is not the intention at all.” She said, speaking my thoughts right out loud which left me wondering if I’d just accidentally spoke what the hell I was supposed to be thinking.

“No, I understand… it’s for the best.” I muttered, sinking further into my seat. She remained quiet after that and eventually I glanced over at her to see that she was sitting there smiling at me.

“Now… back to your break. You mentioned that it was nice, but that it didn’t start out that way… at what point did it become enjoyable?”

“We talked… Hope and I. She tried to avoid me for a while, but Destani and her sister kinda set it up so that we were forced to talk.”

“Her sister? I was under the impression that she didn’t have any siblings.”

“Oh, um… well Tawny,” I said, noticing the immediate surprise and sudden delight on Dr. Yates face, “That was like the Thanksgiving surprise from her dad. Surprising them both while they were together. That didn’t actually start out too smoothly either, but I think Hope is kinda coming around to the concept of Tawny being her sister.”

“Very interesting,” She mumbled, of course scribbling away in her notebook at the same time, “Excuse me for interrupting… please continue where you left off.”

“Well we talked and just kinda came to an understanding. And after that, it just turned out really nice and I felt good pretty much the rest of the time I was there.”

“Have you had any incidents since you’ve been back?”

“No… I haven’t.” I said with a proud smirk. She nodded her head and jotted down one last note before easing her little book shut and pushing it off to the side of her desk. She slipped her glasses off her face and after placing them down on the desktop, she crossed her hands regally on the surface of the desk and smiled at me.

“You had a minor setback regarding what happened with your teammate and I must admit, I was a bit shocked when I learned of that incident. But unfortunately, that is the direct result of your love for Sy’Diyah, which is something that you cannot control. I am pleased with where you are now… and from what I can tell, your time spent together with family and friends was well worth it and very necessary.”

I nodded as she spoke because she was absolutely right… I really didn’t realize it til now, but my time spent with my family and friends was almost vital to me. I can personally say I treasured every moment of time spent at Hope’s dad’s house and I was almost relying on that one week of solace to help me hopefully avoid a blackout anytime soon. After a “job well done” from Dr. Yates, she bid me adieu and I was soon on my way out of her office in a better mood than I’d ever been after any appointment with her.

I marched out the building with my head held high and my swag on ten, feeling like a million bucks. I was on my way to Hope’s room and since she still had a couple of afternoon classes, I planned to spend a little time with her then take a nap in her room while she was in class until it was time for me to head to practice. This is exactly how I intended for things to be between us and it felt amazing knowing that I was finally on the right track to getting better for the sake of my relationship.

Fuck that relationship

I damn near tripped right over my own feet as that feeling washed over me. A dreadful feeling… that felt like it knocked the wind out of me and surged like a dynamite from my chest, through the rest of my body. No… this couldn’t be happening now. I was perfectly fine mere seconds ago and then… no! With a huff from my nose, I shook my head and blinked a few times then continued on toward my destination.

By the time I reached Hope’s dorm, I’d already almost blacked out three different times and my heart was racing with anticipation. I needed to get to her fast to avoid losing myself and I still had to get to the second floor. I was tempted to close my eyes and attempt to feel my way there, but with the lack of damn elevators in the building I would quickly bust my ass going up the stairs. So with a sigh, I tilted my head down and kept my eyes focused on the ground to avoid having to make eye contact with anyone along my route. I managed to make it to her floor unscathed and I breathed a sigh of relief when I realized I only had to cross half the hall before I reached her room.

But of course, with my luck… I glanced up at the last minute and watched in complete horror as a door literally two doors down from Hope’s opened and out stepped a glossy tan leg. It was toned to perfection and my dick twitched as my eyes danced up that thick leg and past the plump ass attached to it. My sights landed on this girls face as she faced the door and locked it... I realized she was a Latina with beautiful wavy black hair that cascaded over her shoulders and stopped just below her perky breasts. I couldn’t decide if I wanted to keep my gaze on her exotic looking profile, her immaculately toned stomach, or her perfectly glossy toned legs showcased nicely in her booty shorts. She looked like she was on her way to work out and just as she reached up to adjust her earphones in her ears, she raised her gaze and locked her eyes on me. 

We held a stare down for a few seconds until she finally cracked an adorable smile and visibly gawked at me from my face, down to my shoes, and back up again.

“Hi.” She greeted in even an adorable voice. Within the blink of an eye, it happened. Looking down at her body had nearly sent me over the edge but the moment she spoke and I blinked, it was over…

“How you doing beautiful?”

Her cheeks flushed almost immediately and she smiled all timidly… with her cute ass. I eased closer to her and leaned against the wall, smoothly dropping two fingers beneath her chin to lift her head so she could look at me. There was no need for her to act shy now… I’m sure she already knew the deal the moment we locked eyes. I was about to assist her with a nice, strenuous work out right here in her room which would surely save her a trip to the gym.

“I’m fine.” She mumbled as she stared longingly into my eyes. Her breath was beginning to hitch already and I hadn’t done more than touch her chin… my, my, my was I gonna have fun with her.

“Good, good. Were you… going somewhere?”

“I… I… I was going to go workout, but…”

“But I think we both know I can help you with that.” Smirking at her, I reached around to the back of her head to grab a handful of her hair and tugged, revealing her evenly tanned neck. Leaning forward, I latched my lips onto her neck and listened to the sound of her heavenly moan and just imagined how much louder she would be in just a matter of minutes.

“Unlock the door baby.” I demanded as I slithered my tongue around to her ear. Her body shuddered against me and I openly caressed her right breast right there in the hall while she fumbled with her keys. I was truly very horny, didn’t give a fuck, and had a point to prove. I don’t know what the fuck this nigga thought this was, but he clearly had shit all twisted if he thought I was just about to sit back and let him continue to walk around stuck all up in ole girl’s ass like that. That shit got real old, real quick and though I let him bask in his little moment with her for over a week during Thanksgiving, I was back now and with a fucking vengeance at that.

Little Latina was still struggling to get the door open and just to add fuel to her fire, I eased a hand along the front of her toned belly and slipped it down into the front of her tight ass spandex shorts. It wasn’t long before I found her treasure and I couldn’t help but chuckle at how wet she already was. Keeping my face tucked in the crook of her sweet smelling neck, I pushed myself off the wall and gently tugged the keys out her hand. On the first attempt I managed to slip the right key into the lock and once I twisted the knob and successfully allowed us entry, I walked her backwards right back into her room. I was done playing these games with bitch boy and ready to make my presence a bit more known. So from now on, it was my way, or the highway.

[torn-and-frayed]

Fragments - Part 3

Word Count: 1837

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Warnings: Canon typical violence, canon divergence

A/N: The next couple parts are probably gonna be similar to this. It’s mostly flashbacks. Getting to know the reader and her past relationship with Dean and the other characters. Constructive feedback is always appreciated. If you’d like to be tagged you can add yourself Here

Fragments Masterlist

“C’mere Pumpkin.” Bobby hoisted you up from the ground onto his lap in the recliner. “I wanna talk to ya for a second.”

“Ok, Daddy.” You turned to face him, looking him in the eyes.

“Remember I told you we were gonna have some guests over? Sam and Dean?” You nodded and smiled, excited to have someone your age coming over. Your dad told you Sam was just a little baby but Dean was the same age. Having someone to play with excited you but made you nervous all at the same time. You never had any kids your age around. “I need you to be nice to Dean, ok? He doesn’t talk much or at all.”

“Why not?”

“Well, Dean’s mom…she died.” You let out a tiny gasp and widened your eyes. “Kinda like your mom.”

“You mean a monster killed her?” Bobby nodded sadly and ran his hand through your hair, saddened that you knew about monsters at such a young age. You didn’t know all the details yet, but you would some day. A demon possessed your mother and Bobby had to kill her. You only knew that much because you’d seen the changes in your mother, including her black eyes staring you down.

“So my mom’s dead too, then?” You looked up at Dean’s face and he sighed, running his hand over his face and nodding his head.

“Yeah. She’s been gone since you were really little.” He explained. “A demon possessed her and Bobby…Bobby had to kill her before she killed you. From what you and Bobby both told me…you didn’t talk for awhile either. You were traumatized. You had night terrors and shit. You still did, even after I met you. I think that’s why you understood me so well.”

“No two kids should have to deal with so much…” you murmured, absently playing with a frayed piece of blanket and letting a few tears slide down your face. “It isn’t fair.”

“You’re right. It isn’t.” Dean agreed. “Do you want me to stop for now? Is it too much?”

“No. No keep going.”

“They should be here soon.” Bobby said and you slid off his lap, crawling up into the kitchen chair and grabbing your crayons and a piece of construction paper.

“Dean doesn’t have to talk if he doesn’t wanna.” You shrugged and started drawing two stick figures hugging each other and a giant heart. “Daddy?”

“Yeah, Pumpkin?”

“How d’you spell Dean?” You drew an arrow and labeled one stick figure ‘Y/N’ while Bobby walked toward the window and peered through the curtain. You drew another arrow and waited, tapping your crayon.

“D-E-A-N.” Bobby said, pulling the curtain back. “They’re here.”

“What if he hates me?” You were suddenly worried, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth and chewing.  

“Y/N…” Bobby knelt down, taking your face in his hands. “He’ll love you. Everyone does, Pumpkin. You’re just like sunshine.” Bobby made his way to the door and let them inside. You followed behind, slightly nervous but slightly excited for the possibility of a new friend.

John entered first, carrying baby Sam in his arms. You barely noticed them. Your gaze instantly fell to the little boy who trailed just slightly behind John. He was dirty blonde with green eyes and bowlegs and just looked so sad.

“Y/N.” Bobby put his hand on your back and pushed you forward a bit. “This is John Winchester. That’s Sam and that’s Dean.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Y/N.” John knelt down to your level with Sam and extended his hand for you. You shook it, just like your father taught you.

“Nice to meet you too, sir.” You said, remembering your manners.

“This is Dean.” John pushed Dean forward. “Dean, are you gonna say hello?” Dean looked slightly panicked and you smiled at him, extending your other hand with the picture you’d drawn for him. You didn’t say anything at all, simply handing it over. He unfolded it and looked at it for several seconds before looking back up at you and giving you a half smile, which you returned instantaneously.

John and Bobby made more small talk before John finally left, leaving Sam and Dean. “Dean, I imagine you’re hungry.” Bobby said. “Y/N can show you to the kitchen and get you a snack if you want.” Dean nodded his head and you reached out your hand for him. He took it and you led him into the kitchen, grabbing some food and juice from the refrigerator.

You showed him to his room shortly after that. Sam was sound asleep in the crib and the two of you sat there, just watching Sam sleep.  

“Dean?” You questioned after sitting in silence for awhile. His eyes moved up to yours, showing you he was listening even if he didn’t answer. “My daddy told me about your mommy. My mommy sorta died the same way.” You said. “Can I give you a real hug? Sometimes it helps.”

He just barely nodded and you opened your arms, wrapping him up and squeezing hard. He didn’t know how to react at first, but then he melted into you. He wrapped his tiny arms back around you and rested his head on your shoulder, unwilling to let go. Bobby found the two of you wrapped up together, sound asleep on the bed when he came to find you for dinner.

“You still didn’t get to the I love you.” You hummed against Dean’s chest. He promised to tell you everything, and so far he had delivered. It was taking all night, but you didn’t care. You wanted to know everything about your life and you’d stay here forever if you had to.

“I’m getting to that. Stop being impatient.” Dean fake scolded. “I had to tell the whole story of how we first met before I got to that.”

“Alright, alright. I’m sorry! Continue your story.”

“So…we were only there about two days on that first visit. I didn’t see you again for about a week and that time we stayed longer.” Dean’s expression changed to a soft smile at the memory.

“Daddy?” You padded into the room Sam and Dean were staying in, rubbing your sleepy eyes. “I heard a noise.”

“Go back to bed, Pumpkin. S’ok.” You squinted, letting your eyes adjust to the room and saw your dad putting Dean back to bed. His face looked wet, like he’d been crying.

“Is De ok?”

“Go on back to bed, Y/N. Everything’s fine.”

You waited in the hallway, pressed to the wall until your dad went back to his room before you took a few steps inside the boys’ room. Dean was on his side, facing the door with his eyes open. The blanket was clenched in his fist and pulled up under his chin, like he was holding onto it for dear life. “De? Can I come in?” He nodded and you walked inside, pulling yourself up into his bed. “Are you sick?” He shook his head no and sniffled. “Bad dream?”

Dean didn’t do anything at first, but you waited, watching him. You laid down in the bed next to him and he finally nodded his head, pulling himself closer to you. “About your mommy?” He nodded again. “I have those too sometimes. ‘Bout mine. Her eyes were black and she was yelling at me and it was really scary but Daddy saved me.” You reached out to Dean, putting your hand on his face. “Daddy said dreams aren’t real and they can’t hurt you, no matter how scary.” You patted him again and started to slide away, heading back to your room when he grabbed you and pulled you back. You turned around and his eyes were wide, like he didn’t want you to leave. “Stay?” You asked and he nodded hard, swallowing the lump in his throat. “K.” You nodded and crawled back in the bed, lying next to him under the covers.

He inched closer, hugging you tightly to him. You hadn’t known each other long but in that time you’d bonded over your similar pasts. You were practically joined at the hip, even though he’d never actually said a word to you. He pulled back a little, looking at you and working up courage he had yet to have around anyone in a little over a month. “I –“ Your eyes widened at the sound of his voice and you stared at him in awe. “I love you.” Dean said, his voice a little hoarse from disuse.

“You talked.” You gasped, a bright smile lighting up your face. “I love you too.”

“Are you crying?” Dean chuckled, brushing your hair back to expose your face. You let out a laugh through your tears and Dean wiped your eyes for you, shaking his head and smiling. His smile was gorgeous. You hadn’t really noticed it yet. He hadn’t had much of a chance to show it yet since you’d been here but now that everyone was back in mostly one piece and safe, the genuine smile he gave made your heart skip a beat.

“Are you making fun of me?”

“Maybe a little.” Dean shrugged.

“So…we’ve been a thing ever since, right?” You asked. “Like cliché childhood sweethearts to adult lovers kinda thing? Never been apart…until you know…I died?”

“Nope.” Dean smirked. “We didn’t get together officially until we were 22.”

“What?” You half shrieked. “You have to be kidding. Did you not satisfy me sexually or something?” Dean’s eyes widened and he shoved your shoulder half-heartedly.

“Maybe you didn’t satisfy my needs.”

“Not a chance. I’ve seen me in the mirror, I’m probably awesome in the sack.” Dean rolled his eyes and laughed but didn’t disagree. “No, really…just…why?” You rested your head back on Dean’s chest, putting your ear against his heart, listening to the steady rhythm.

“Well, I guess it was more the cliché of we didn’t wanna ruin the friendship for one thing.” Dean said. “Another thing was I was scared to death of your father killing me.” You let out a small chuckle at that. “And another thing was…we’re both hunters. Hunters don’t get the apple pie happily ever after stories that civilians get. So I guess we just wanted to spare each other the pain of losing each other but as it turns out, it hurt worse to be apart, ya know? Y/N?” When he didn’t get any response he glanced down and huffed a laugh when he saw you passed out cold on his chest. “I guess I’ll tell you some more tomorrow.”

He couldn’t help but take the chance now to really look at you. As light as he could he ran his hand over your face, tracing every contour and outline. He pulled you close, burying his nose in your hair and inhaling the familiar scent he hadn’t smelled in two years, making a silent promise to you to bring all of you back no matter what it took.  

Fragments - Part 4

[ssugawarakoshii]

Random stuff no one cares about (fuck u jo)

@mysmoldarkfictionalsons told me to do this so it here it is 1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? Milk than cereal

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? Yes

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? Pages of homework, pens, tickets, earphones

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? Alone or with really little milk

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? Yup

6: do you keep plants? Two cactus

7: do you name your plants? Nope

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? Does editing count?

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? Yes

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? All three? But I’ll say side?

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? “Stitch”

12: what’s your favorite planet? Uranus

13: what’s something that made you smile today? Talking about 80s voltron with Ce

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? It’d be small, full of our stuff and a comfy sofa for us to cuddle

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! There is a planet that may be made entirely out of diamonds

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? Spaghetti carbonara

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? Rose gold/purple/blue

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. When they got drunk in the village party and they tried jumping to the river from the bridge and I had to take care of them all (I am the one to bring this up btw)

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? Kind of? And just random ideas and stuff (ok and also dates and shit)

20: what’s your favorite eye color? Green

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. It’s blue with starts on it and it’s completely destroyed by now, the zip doesn’t even work anymore and it’s all full of scratches rip

22: are you a morning person? Depends tbh

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? Watch a movie/show/anime, read or edit

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? I think yes?

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? An old house… I don’t usually break into places

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? My Panama jack shoes rip

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? Berries

28: sunrise or sunset? Sunset

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? When she’s nervous, Eva is always trying to grab someone’s hand without realising AND IT’S SO CUTE

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? Yup

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. I like socks, but not that much? In winter and all they’re great but in summer I prefer my feet to be free

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. A guy in the village party (again) kept following us around, so Angel went and asked him what happened. The guy then just turned around like half pouting and handed us his empty hand and was like “I wanted to give you cookies”. And we ran. The lesson is, kids, never drink or do drugs if you don’t want to end up like that man

33: what’s your fave pastry? Orejas de carnaval con chocolate

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? It was called Eric and it was a white dog with brown spots and it’s somewhere in my room, im pretty sure

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? Yeah but in the end I always end up using the most normal stuff

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? Oh wonder

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? Clean

38: tell us about your pet peeves! I hate it when people like crack their knuckles? Nope don’t do that in front of me I beg you. Also people that walk slow… move dammit

39: what color do you wear the most? Black

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? The chain my grandmother gave me for my communion. It has an image of virgin Maria as a child and my name engraved and she told me my grandfather had always wanted to give me a chain like that one

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? El laberinto de los espíritus

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! Not really

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? Silvia…

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? Like a week ago? Lmao it didn’t last long

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? Yup.. doesn’t mean they work

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. Are you a son of Poseidon? Cause you got me all wet (I’m gonna go bury myself now)

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? Cauliflower. Take it away

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? My biggest fear was the world suddenly ending… yep…. I was weird. Maybe it isn’t the same but yoU CAN’T TELL ME THAT ISN’T SCARY

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? Yes but I usually cant buy them which leads to the part where I can’t remember which one was the last I bought

50: what’s an odd thing you collect? Do snow globes count? I have some of them and I love them

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? I’m not mentioning the person but photograph

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? The glasses one? Is that from this year or last? Ah fuck it

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? No, yes, no, yes Weird af but strangely great

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? Grandma

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? Breaking a pencil (the thing we were discussing was that I didn’t have enough strength to break it okay so I got all hulk mode and broke it)

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? people that do a lot of hand gestures (they remind me of myself tho)

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? It makes me feel like a psycho murdered :’) nah kidding it makes me feel nostalgic AND WHO DOESN’T RE-ENACT THE LYRICS SMH

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? Jandro is the Vodka aunt and Jo is the wine mom (although she is Vodka but she is way more mom so fuck it)

59: what’s your favorite myth? Persephone’s myth or Icarus one

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? I love it and my fave authors (cause I can’t choose poems) are Bécquer, Góngora, Rubén Darío and Pablo Neruda

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? I’ve never given really stupid gifts? My gifts are good *gasps* and my cousin gave me a clown nose once

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? Sometimes I drink orange juice

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? I am very fussy and it’s the one thing I’ll always have tidy af

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? Ugly grey ugh

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? Do my online friends count? Maybe?

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? It’d have blue and white that’s all I know

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? Sleepy. That’s it.

68: what’s winter like where you live? Cold and grey but with snow tho

69: what are your favorite board games? To be honest I don’t know?

70: have you ever used a ouija board? Nah (I was going to, then backed down you see)

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea? I don’t know, I’m more of a coffee girl

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? Yep

73: what are some of your worst habits? Biting my cheeks/lip until it bleeds and scratching my scalp and ears until it bleeds too (que sanguinolenta por favor)

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. Love

75: tell us about your pets! A bird, his name is Winnie and he’s a little shit but I love him

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? Studying history

77: pink or yellow lemonade? Yellow (I’ve never had pink lol)

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? I’m neutral ground

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? Joana’s video for my birthday

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? Violet and white and yes I chose it because they’re two of my faves colours there’s nothing feel about it

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. Beer bottle

82: are/were you good in school? I am good thanks very much

83: what’s some of your favorite album art? Idk

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? Idk

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? Yes and here’s a thing about me I cannot by the sake of my life choose favorites in anything don’t make me do it

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? Depends?

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? Tbh I’d say the Godfather (can’t really think of any other rn rip why do you put me in such compromises?)

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? No??

89: are you close to your parents? Meh

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. All I have to say is it has history, culture and it’s beautiful sorry I don’t want to make this long

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? Dublin lololol

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? Drown it in cheese bitch give me all of it

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? Ponytail/bun

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? A classmate on the 28th

95: what are your plans for this weekend? Doing my Spanish project and editing

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? Procrastination my dear

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? INFP, cancer, Ravenclaw

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? I’m not sure? Sometime in December with my father and yes

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. Light by sleeping at last100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 5 years into the future, I don’t want to relive my past thanks

I don’t have anyone to tag (my only friends are the tagger (fuck you) and the other person she tagged ( @nekolance why) So bye bye do it if you want to