#i was gearing up all last night and today for this and i dragged myself out of bed for it like ugh ....whatever at least now i can rot

[fairycosmos]

plans got cancelled while i was on the way to them

[klaprisun]

One Sunny Day

(Stardew Valley)(Haley x Female Farmer)

Chapter 21: Back to Danny's POV

Before leaving Haley’s bathroom, I paused in the doorway. Haley stares at me with curiosity, her captivating, doe-like eyes radiating with innocence.

My head was rushing with a million thoughts a second. I was thinking about what could have happened last night, how it felt, how Haley must feel, and if things will go back to normal between us. But what really stuck in my mind, hanging off the tip of my tongue, was the thought of asking her if she’d want to have dinner with me sometime. The words just didn’t quite make it out of my mouth.

I don’t want to just assume that from last night she is into girls. I remember Sebastian asking her that hefty question during Truth or Dare and she never answered. The rest of the night was a blur. For all I know, all of the lipstick and hickeys I woke up with this morning could’ve been from anyone…right? I just happened to wake up on Haley and Emily’s couch. They probably just brought me back to their house to make sure I was alright and not wandering off drunk and alone.

On my walk home, my body ached with each step I took. My stomach was not feeling the greatest either, the heat and emptiness of it were not helping the cause.

Stepping off the path and into the trees, I start heaving into the bushes. I brace my arm against a nearby tree trunk and continue to stay bent over until I feel okay enough to continue home.

“I should’ve just asked her to go to dinner. What was I thinking?” I mumble to myself as I wipe my mouth on my arm.

Cautiously, I bring myself upright so I can keep walking. I don’t go too fast so as to not upset my stomach and head.

“You too, huh?” I hear a voice call from the pathway. Turning around, I see that it’s Sam looming around. It makes sense since the path we are on is right by his house.

“Ugh, yeah. Rough morning caused by a reckless night. Don’t know what I was thinking,” I reply, breathlessly. I bring the back of my hand up to my mouth to hold back another heave.

“Woah woah woah whatcha got there?” Sam bounces over through the few trees and bushes to get to where I was. “I could see those damn hickeys from all the way back there. Someone got freaky last night.”

“Can it, you,” I shot back, embarrassed.

“Who did the damage?” He wiggles his eyebrows as he waits for my response.

“Oh you don’t know her. She is from another town,” I joke. I make sure to say in a very playful tone to hopefully make it more known that I’m kidding.

“But you were with us last night..?” Sam furrows his brows, deep in thought. The joke flew right over his head.

“I know I was with you guys last night. That’s why it can’t be someone from another town. Look where I’m coming from,” I turn and point towards Haley and Emily’s house which is beside his place.

He takes a minute to think. I can almost see the gears working in his brain. Not long after, I see the moment the lightbulb lights up in his head.

“OH!” He shouts and brings his hands up to the back of his head in shock. I just give him an awkward smile. “So y’all like…?” He trails off.

“I have no idea what happened. We both blacked out. I only have these and had lipstick smears on my face to go by,” I drag my finger down my neck along the hickeys.

“Wicked,” He holds his fist out to me. To make him happy, I bump my fist against his. With that, he bounces back to the path and back to his house. He reminds me of a little puppy dog with all that energy and carefreeness of his.

When I continue back on the path to my house, I end up going by Marnie’s farm. Apparently everyone wants to be out and about and in my business because Shane and I run into each other just as he is leaving home. He and Jas live on the farm with Marnie. Of all days to run into everyone, it just has to be the day where I’m trying to hide out.

“Well well well look who it is,” Shane says to me.

“Hi Shane,” I politely responded.

“You’re looking ill today,” he examines my pale face, I notice his eyes landing on my neck. I watch as he widens them but quickly shakes it off, not saying a word about it. “Too much partying last night?”

“Yeah just a bit.”

“Feel better,” he tells me. It almost sounded like a threat but I think he was just trying to be polite.

“Thank you…” I hesitate. I turn on my heels and start rushing home, hoping not to run into anyone else.

Rounding the corner and finally reaching the small path that is located at the south of my farm, I survey my field and house from a distance. To my horror, Mayor Lewis and the governor are standing on my porch chatting. They must’ve seen my movement from the corner of their eyes, because they wave me over.

Oh my Yoba. Why does this have to happen to me? I ponder to myself.

“Hello there, Danny!” Mayor Lewis hollers across the field. I do a heavy sigh as I start shuffling over. It’s too late to run away at this point since they already have seen me.

“G’day Mayor Lewis. Governor.” I went to tip my hat at them, but I forgot I hadn’t worn it yesterday. I awkwardly go to scratch my forehead instead, hoping they didn’t catch my mistake.

“You must’ve been busy today, we kept trying to come and talk all morning!” Lewis says cheerfully.

“Yeah… Super busy… You know me!” I try to match his giddiness but I’m just not in the mood.

“We just wanted to tell you how good you made that soup yesterday with your melon. It was the perfect touch!” The governor praises me. This whole time, I have been angling myself away from them, hoping they don’t look at my neck.

“It was a really hard choice of what to bring. I even had to ask for help. You have to thank Haley for convincing me to bring it,” I point out.

“Well she has good taste, “ Lewis chimes in, “You seem like you are in a rush to get inside. We will get going now, I think the governor has a train to catch soon anyway. Have a good day!” The two start heading down the path to the East of my farm that leads into Town Square.

“I thought they’d never leave,” I huff as I slump into my bed. It’s only the afternoon and I’m absolutely drained. I still have yet to water my crops today.

Groaning, I drag myself out of bed to get it done and over with. I’m going to need a well deserved shower and rest in bed after.

“Just the person I’m looking for! What good timing!” Leah exclaims as she walks up the steps of my porch as I walk out the front door.

I freeze in the doorway as I watch her walk up the steps, knowing full well she is going to say something about my neck.

Sure enough, the next words out of her mouth after her gasp of bewilderment were just what I was expecting. “DID YOU AND HALEY HOOK UP!?” Leah squeals excitedly.

“I have no idea what happened,” I say hushed, trying to get her to quiet down as well.

“What do you mean you ‘have no idea’? You don’t remember a single thing?” She frowns at me. I shake my head. “You have to be joking? Whatever happened between you two was clearly steamy and you can’t remember?” she bellows, clearly pitying me.

“I barely remember Truth or Dare. Everything after that is a total black out.” I tell her.

“That totally sucks. I can’t imagine how you guys feel. Did you talk about it… or anything at least?”

“I had to comfort her this morning… she wasn’t taking it so well,” I sulk, reminiscing on the morning events.

“I was going to ask you for a small favor… but I think it can wait. I just wanted some wood from your chopped trees but I’ll come back another day. See ya later, Danny.” As she starts walking away, I notice Elliot making his way from the direction she is walking towards.

“Are you kidding me?!” I shout, making Leah laugh. She high fives Elliot as they pass each other, rubbing it in that another person has come to talk to me.

“And what may you want? Yes these are hickeys, yes they are likely from Haley as I woke up on her couch this morning, and No I don’t remember anything. Let’s just get that out of the way right now,” I state firmly, answering all the likely questions he may ask.

“Woooaahhh there. I just wanted to make sure you are alive after last night. You seemed pretty drunk. I guess this…” he waves a hand in my direction, “...answers all my questions. I’ll leave you with your sorrows now. See you later.” Elliot walks away laughing to himself, amused with my disheveled appearance and attitude.

“That better be everyone,” I mumble under my breath as I start watering the crops.

As I get a quarter of the way done with watering, I begin to hear footsteps coming from the north pathway. Immediately, I turn around and point in the direction of the pathway, telling whoever it was to leave. Thank Yoba it was only Sebastian. I would’ve felt bad if it was Robin or Maru, but I just can’t deal with another person asking me questions today.

Sebastian had put his hands up in surrender, backing up slowly as he understood it was not a good time. Sam must’ve spilled the beans to him at some point today and so he wanted to see for himself.

Shaking my head, I go back to watering the rest of the crops so I can finally shower and go to bed. I have a lot of thinking to do tonight.

[underthenightskydreamsneverdie]

Summary: Sebastian and Ominis cheer on a Hufflepuff MC

Pairings: Sebastian x f!reader x Ominis

A/N: Holy fucking shit this turned out so cute. I won’t be taking criticism at this or any time because I’m soft and I’ll cry. My first HL writing, hope you guys like! Special shoutout to @kirke-is-my-name for this fic idea! 

______________________________________

Sebastian turned away from the mirror and looked Ominis over. Yellow really wasn’t his color, but today was about MC. 

“Well Omi, I think we’re ready. Do you think MC will be surprised we could get our hands on this much Hufflepuff gear so quickly?” He’d woken up this morning with the brilliant, at least to him, idea to wear MCs house colors to the quidditch game. 

“As usual, Sebastian, you’ve gone overboard in this ridiculous scheme to show everyone MC is your girl.” Ominis replied as the little badger painted on his cheek growled in his ear. “You do know that badgers eat snakes, right?”

Sebastian doubled over at the unintended innuendo “We certainly know this badger does!” 

Ominis couldn't help but smile, a blush spreading over his pale face,  remembering last nights activities in the Undercroft. “That she does.” 

“Alright, mate, get your head out of the Undercroft, we’re gonna miss the teams walk onto the field, during which I plan to make a complete fool of myself cheering our girl on.” Sebastian leaned in, landing a quick kiss on Ominis’ soft lips before dragging him out of the empty dorm. 

_____________________________________________

MC landed her broom on the pitch, sweaty and screaming. Hufflepuff had won the match by fifty points, knocking Ravenclaw out of the running for the upcoming Quidditch Cup. Hearing a familiar voice over the shouting all around her, she turned to see Sebastian, clad in an obscene amount of yellow, running towards her, followed by an equally yellow clad Ominis. 

“MC YOU DID IT!!!” Sebastian screamed in your ear as he picked you up and spun around, laughing and covering you in kisses as he placed you back on the ground. You kiss him passionately, then turn and pull Ominis in for a tight hug. 

“You were incredible, darling” he says into your ear, quickly kissing your cheek before he can stop himself. The crowd draws him out of his boldness and he lets you go, taking a few steps back.

Sebastian throws an arm around your shoulders, gently pulling you to follow the crowd off the pitch. “I hope you don’t think it’ll be that easy of a match against Slytherin, MC. I certainly won’t be going easy on you because you’re my girlfriend.” 

You scoff and elbow him in the ribs. “Like I need you to!” 

He rubs his side, laughing, “No, but you might wish I did after we kick Hufflepuffs butts.”

You stop walking, letting your mouth twist up in pretend disgust, “Oh please, I could beat you with my eyes closed, Sallow!”

“Could not! I've been flying a hell of a lot longer than you, MC!” His voice begins to rise along with an angry flush of his skin.

You hardly hear Ominis grumble “Oh boy, here we go again” behind you, caught up as you are in fighting with Sebastian. 

“And yet, I play just as well as you do, Sebastian!”

“HEY!” Ominis shouts from behind you, the force of it shocking you both into silence. Ominis takes a few steps to stand in front of the pair of you, waiting until he hears the last of the straggling fans round the corner towards the castle. 

“You're both winners to me.” He pulls you both in for a couple deep kisses, a hand lingering on each of your faces. 

“Aw, Ominis, thank you.” You reach up and squeeze the hand on your cheek.

Sebastian does the same, giving him a small smile. “I hope you're still this sweet after I KICK MCs ASS!!!” 

Ominis lets out a frustrated scream, pulling his hands from yours, turns and starts making his way back to the castle, grinning as he hears you two resume your bickering. He couldn't wait to cheer for both of his loves. 

[rickmymanrick]

one rule | chapter four

[rick grimes x original female character slowburn]

summary: a supply run goes wrong and daphne finds herself reunited with an old acquaintance.

notes: i’ll be including different POVs in the coming chapters. also not sure how I’m feeling about writing in past tense. i’m better at present tense and so I feel like this is some shit writing. if i switch all of a sudden, you know why. also, we’re starting to deviate from the original storyline a bit so bare with me. also be sure to check out the important character info i added to the masterlist of the series!!

masterlist!

I wish I could say I handled the situation with a bit of dignity, but I'd be lying. 

Turns out, luck was not on my side the following morning, and Shane was up and pacing as per usual even before I woke up at dawn. Had he even gone to sleep? His hair was tousled, as if he'd been pulling at it for hours. And when I got a closer look at him albeit reluctantly, his eyes were bloodshot red. It wasn't hard to tell that he didn't get a wink of sleep.

My first instinct when I saw him was to duck back into my tent and peer at his tiny figure in the distance through the sliver of the flaps. And my anxiety nearly made me pass out when he came too close to my tent for comfort, glaring at the flaps like he could see straight through them. I held my breath until he walked away.

And when it was finally time to leave the tent, dressed and dragging an unenthusiastic and grumpy Glenn behind me, I avoided Shane at all costs. Was it fucked up to leave without saying goodbye? Abso- fucking - lutely, but my anxiety couldn't give less of a shit. I didn't usually get this nervous - I'd even consider myself a bit suave - but knowing there was actually some truth behind his teasing and flirting over the three years I'd known him was making me feel rather guilty. I'm not responsible for anyone else's feelings, but I know I shouldn't have led him on last night. I shouldn't have been so selfish.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" asked Glenn as I finished rushing through my goodbye to Lori and practically sprinted to the van. He still looked grumpy, more exhausted than anything.

I beelined for the passenger's seat, quietly calling shotgun and the others knew better than to actually argue with me. I slammed the door shut, gripping the pistol Shane gave me last night nervously. Adrenaline was surging from the tips of my toes up my legs, causing me to obnoxiously bounce the gun on my knee. Glenn gave me a side-eye. I quickly pocketed the weapon. Maybe the fact that I was actually going into the city again was making me more anxious than usual. Not Shane and this high school drama. 

"Nothing," I said defensively. "I am absolutely fine."

I could very well die. And then the kiss wouldn't even matter then, would it? At that resolution, I decided to take one last glance over at the edge of the woods, where Shane was surely standing. He wasn't, in fact, and I looked over at Lori who stood with Carl against her chest. They were both waving, the boy giving us a wide, hopeful smile. Lori locked eyes with me and suddenly glanced to the space in front of the car. I followed her gaze and saw Shane standing a few feet ahead, staring straight at the passengers side of the car. He gave me a strange look, almost guarded but also as vulnerable as I've ever seen him. It was a look only I could decipher - the pain, the longing, the regret... regret for letting me leave today or regret for even kissing me in the first place?

I didn't have much time to search for the answer in his eyes because Glenn had put the car in reverse as soon as Morales slammed the back door shut. Shane got smaller and smaller, his hands resting on his hips, as we made it a safe distance to be able to make a three-point turn out of there. The last thing I caught was the odd look Lori was giving Shane from across the camp as he kept his attention locked on the van. Glenn shifted gears and the view of the camp disappeared, the path down the mountain ahead of us and the outline of the city glooming like a dark, stormy cloud.

It was tense and silent, no one saying a single word as we drove farther away from our little safe haven and closer to the city of the dead.

Just as we all expected, Merle made not a single effort to help collect supplies. It was just the six of us rummaging through an abandoned supermarket, piling up whatever necessities we could find in a corner.

My arms burned from the exhaustion after the first hour or so. I’d been focusing on the pharmaceutical section, mostly because I was hoping to find Carl and their other kids some supplements but also because Merle happened to be lurking around the area as well. It didn’t take a genius to figure out why.

My eyes trailed over to where he was standing, finding him at the end of the aisle I was sweeping out. I furrowed my eyebrows and stomped over, hoping to get a glimpse at whatever he was scoping out before he could grab it for his stash. 

Painkillers. Extra Strength to be precise, and about four bottles untouched. 

"Excuse me," I muttered, narrowly avoiding his stature as he obnoxiously stayed in the same spot, despite my undeserved politeness. I rolled my eyes and cut right in front of him, snatching the bottles and throwing them into my shopping basket with a scowl. 

"Don't worry," chuckled Merle. "I got my sights set on bigger things."

"Oh yeah? What's that?" I asked monotonously, not even sparing him a glance as I scanned the rest of the shelves around him.

He didn't answer, not verbally at least. I forced myself to look back at the annoying fucker and instantly did a double-take...

There by the pharmacy desk -- Merle was standing with the toothiest smile I'd ever seen from him and swinging a striker hammer like it was a baseball bat. He barely gave me a second to react before he was swinging his arm back and slamming the hammer into the glass wall that separated the pharmacy prescriptions and him. The noise instantly made me flinch, the impact vibrating throughout the deserted store like he'd slammed it into a megaphone. 

"Hey!" "What the hell was that?!" "Daphne, what the fuck?"

Everyone came rushing towards the pharmacy, following the source of the sound. 

"What are you doing? You're being too loud!" Andrea said loudly.

"We're going to be surrounded by walkers if you keep that shit up!" T-Dog said angrily.

Merle acted as if he didn't hear a damn thing, banging the hammer against the crack that had already formed in the glass. 

"Have you even tried the door?" Morales said over everyone's angry protests. Glenn and I glanced at each other worriedly, knowing the place could be overrun by walkers any minute. My legs were itching to make a run for it.

"It's got--" he grunted as he swung his arm with all his strength. The wall finally shattered into tiny bits of glass. "-- a keypad on it." Merle snickered as he jumped over the counter and into the restricted pharmacy section, slamming his hammer into the doorknob on the other side and swinging it open with a proud smile. 

We all stood speechless, surprised he would even be courteous enough to open the door for the rest of us-- especially knowing his only goal to get in here was to raid the stash for any drugs he could consume recreationally. He probably figured even he wouldn't have enough pocketroom to store a whole pharmacy full of drugs in. I wouldn't be surprised if the only reason he was letting us have our pick of the litter was so he could just steal it from our stock at camp. 

Nevertheless, I shoved past the rest of the group and followed after Merle. Glenn was right on my heels, grabbing the first box of diphenhydramine he saw. He shoved it into my basket hastily. 

"Your sniffling keeps me up sometimes," he said sheepishly after I gave him an incredulous look. 

"Damn, I'm sorry," I winced. You'd think my sinuses would've gotten used to the outdoors at this point. 

"Guys, I'm gonna check the front. Make sure none of the walkers heard this psycho," said Morales.

"Yeah," grumbled Merle. "You oughta be thankin' me, boy!"

Glenn rolled his eyes and swept a whole shelf of medicine into my basket, my arm dropping significantly. 

"Dude!" I groaned. 

"Here," he took the basket from me. "We'll put it in the corner with everything else."

"Guys," Morales called from the front of the store.

"Yeah?" answered Jacqui, joining Glenn and I in the corner, placing an armful of muscle relaxers on top of the pile. 

Morales suddenly came rushing back, pale and shaking. "There's a hoard of them coming from the west side of the city. Down Peachtree. They're moving fast. We gotta go right now."

“I gotta gather up the stuff—” I muttered, making a quick move for the pile of supplies we’d spent over an hour accumulating.

”There’s no time for that!” Morales said, panicked. “This idiot attracted the whole block. We gotta go now!”

A sudden banging and chorus of growls sent us all flying toward the opposite exit, my fingers barely gripping onto one of the bottles of diphenhydramine Glenn had give me.

It was astounding how quickly the dead could move, despite being— you know, dead. It also sent a terrorizing chill down my spine and a surge of cortisol that had me nearly suffocating in anxiety.

We crossed the street in a sprint, leaving behind the supermarket, and I spared a glance back as we kept putting distance between us and the horde. 

Walkers were smashing through the windows of the store, using debris from the streets to crack the fragile glass open. Some were even capable of opening the damn doors for themselves. They were running limply, searching for us as we disappeared into the ruins of the city. 

I forced my gaze ahead, hearing Glenn’s frantic instructions and suddenly feeling very meek about our odds of survival. They were coming from all directions, running with flesh hanging off their decaying bodies, moans and screeching echoing off each building, dead sights set on us… there were hundreds.

I pushed my legs faster, despite the burn, and gripped onto Glenn’s backpack to catch up. His hand traveled down to my wrist without looking. 

Jacqui suddenly yelped and then Merle grunted. Morales cursed and T-Dog threw his head into his arms as we found ourselves pinned between a parking garage and a dead-end alley.

The walkers were coming full force, their arms extended with rotting fingers, teeth snapping as if they could already taste our untouched flesh. I dug my nails into Glenn’s arm and prepared for the worst—

A horse neighed loudly. The odd sound echoed between the buildings and effectively causing every single one of us to freeze. Even the walkers hesitated and turned toward the sound.

I held my breath.

BANG!

BANG!

I counted four gunshots. There could’ve been more but I didn’t give a fuck after the initial shock wore off because I was grabbing at Glenn’s flannel and dragging him into the garage like my life depended on it. I hoped the others did the same because I wasn’t looking back to check. My priority was our survival and as soon as those walkers started going for the bigger prey, I knew it was the only chance we’d have.

Glenn got the gist quickly and he was running beside me, heading for the closest door and hoping it was unlocked. Our prayers were heard when it flew open, all of us rushing through it without even considering the possibility of running into even more danger.

We were supposed to die mere seconds ago. Any minute we were still breathing was on borrowed time— if we ran into death now, well it was just inevitable, wasn’t it? 

The empty hallway got smaller and darker until we were hitting another door and running into the streets again. This time, a lot more empty than before. It seems the gunshots attracted all of them… thankfully.

I spotted a tourist shop just across the street. My legs sprang into motion again, adrenaline coursing through my veins. Still, I was finally starting to notice how out of breath I was becoming.

"How the fuck do you do this?" I wheezed, looking over at Glenn who, to my surprise, wasn't looking too hot either. 

"I don't," he said exhaustedly. "I'm not usually seen."

I shrugged, reaching the tourist shop first and practically slamming the glass doors open and pushing through the racks of clothes until I saw a small, dark hallway. I heard a scuffle of footsteps behind me, the group moving as quickly but quietly as possible. 

We made it into a small room, filing cabinets lining the walls, some papers thrown across the floor but otherwise untouched. And safe.

T-Dog quickly shut the other door that led into the room to another parking garage. The click of the lock made us all release a deep breath.

Finally.

Everyone heaved, some against the wall and others with their hands on their knees. Even Merle looked winded and a bit startled. I looked up at the ceiling, thanking whatever force was listening for the fact that we were still alive. 

"I gotta go back," Glenn said after he caught his breath.

"What?" "Are you kidding?" "We got away! I say we take the win!"

"I'm not asking any of you to come with me. I just - I'm gonna go see what's up," he said with his hands up. Andrea pulled at her hair anxiously and walked to the furthest corner of the room. 

The logical part of my brain was screaming at me not to go. To let Glenn be a dumbass on his own. I sighed, "Let's go." I made sure Shane's pistol was fully loaded. 

"What?!" stressed Andrea, pulling so hard her hair might just come out. Even Jacqui was starting to look a bit panicked. 

"Hey, it's okay. We'll be back. Here - " I snapped the safety back on and handed Andrea the gun, probably making a horrible decision but in all the times Glenn had ventured into the city alone, he's never taken a weapon. As long as it was just the two of us, I don't see why we'd need it if we snuck around his way. 

Andrea hesitantly took it and that's when I noticed Merle's absence... At least, there would be a gun within the group while we were gone, since Merle and his rifle disappeared. I couldn't bring myself to care.

" - you'll be safe in the meantime. Don't go outside. Don't make any loud noises. Just wait," I commanded. I made eye contact with each person and they all nodded back. 

Glenn stood by the door, waiting for me to finish my instructions quietly. Once I was done, I looked over at him, heading for the exit T-Dog had just locked. "Let's go," I nodded.

It's my downfall-- if Glenn was going to be a dumbass (which was 90% of the time), I was going to follow suit.

We climbed the staircase ahead of us, successfully evading the two stray walkers that were lingering in the alley. Our quiet footsteps went unnoticed and I followed Glenn without missing a step. We reached the roof of the building we'd found refuge in, looking out over the city. From our view of the main road, we still couldn't quite spot where the hoard had congregated. Glenn broke out into a jog, crossing a vent that connected to the next building. I followed behind him, releasing a breath once we made our way across the tall gap. We rounded the corner of the building's fire escape and climbed a short ladder that led to the very top of this taller building. It was closer to the main intersection where the gunshots had come from. 

I nearly gagged at the sight below us. The horse was currently on its side, being devoured and chewed on by a mass of walkers. Even from this distance, I could hear the tearing of flesh and guts. Thankfully, the horse had died quickly. I followed the trail of walkers to a military tank that was abandoned in the middle of the intersection. I tried to find the body of whoever had fired their gun but the only mess of intestines and blood I could find was that of the horse. 

"They must've found a way into the tank," said Glenn, crouching down by the edge. He fished through his backpack, pulling out his walkie-talkie he so conveniently neglected to use on his solo trips into the city. 

I watched Glenn curiously as he fidgeted with the knobs of the radio.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Military tanks should have radio systems. Let's hope this one's still works." He started fidgeting with the radio dials. I sighed impatiently. 

Part of me hoped he wouldn't be able to connect, just so we could get the hell out of dodge already. After about a minute of him fidgeting, I opened my mouth to scold the everloving shit out of my best friend--

The radio beeped in success. Glenn enthusiastically clicked on the talk button. 

"Hey, you," said Glenn a little too cheerfully. I sighed in annoyance and started pacing the length of the rooftop. 

It wasn't that I wanted this guy to die or anything. I just happened to have a very strong sense of self-preservation. Not just for myself but for my idiotic best friend. I watched as Glenn got closer to the edge, staring intently at the surrounded tank. I joined him begrudgingly. 

"Dumbass," he tried again. "Yeah, you in the tank. Are you cozy in there?"

"Stop fucking around, Glenn. We gotta go." I nervously looked around at the growing mass of walkers. They were rapidly multiplying and our available exit routes were becoming very slim. 

"Just hold on," He gave me an annoyed look and shook the walkie-talkie a bit. "Hey, are you alive in there?"

He's dead. He has to be. I'm reaching for Glenn, pulling at his backpack and there wasn't much resistance. Maybe, he, too, was losing hope. 

A new voice cut through the silence. "Hello? Hello?" 

We both scrambled to the edge. "There you are," Glenn sounded relieved. I guess I was too. "You had me wondering."

The southern accent wasted no time in responding, distorted by the crackle of the radio. He sounded even more desperate than us. "Where are you-- outside? Can you see me right now?"

"We can see you. You're surrounded by walkers. That's the bad news."

"There's good news?" I almost laughed at his pessimistic tone. 

Glenn deadpanned, "No."

"Listen, whoever you are. I don't mind telling you I'm a little concerned in here," he responded gruffly. 

"Oh man. You should see it from over here. You'd be having a major freak-out."

I elbowed Glenn quickly. Just because he's right, doesn't mean he had to instill even more fear into the guy. 

His only hope of survival was us. I could hardly imagine Merle giving a shit about anyone other himself and his brother. And the others... well, let's just say they lacked the sort of dumbassery Glenn was naturally born with. 

"Got any advice for me?"

Glenn and I shared a glance. We quickly discussed the best escape route for this man whom we've never even fucking met. 

"Hello?" The radio spoke.

"Yeah," Glenn said after our extensive planning. "...I'd say make a run for it." 

I gawked.

"That's it? 'Make a run for it?'" The stranger said exactly what I was thinking. 

"My way's not as dumb as it sounds. You've got eyes on the outside here. There's one geek still up on the tank but the others have climbed down and joined the feeding frenzy where the horse went down. You with me so far?"

"So far."

"Okay, the street on the other side of the tank is less crowded. If you move now while they're distracted, you stand a chance."

I grabbed the walkie from Glenn's grasp. "You got ammo?"

"Uh--" the stranger sounded taken aback. "In that duffle bag I dropped out there and guns. Can I get to it?" 

"Absolutely not," Glenn told me firmly, as if he knew what I was thinking. 

We needed weapons at the camp. Desperately. Something tells me an opportunity like this wouldn't arise again. 

"Can--can I get to it? Are you still there?"

Glenn snatched the walkie back. "No. Forget the bag, it's not an option. What do you have on you?"

"Hang on."

The line went silent. I tried to spot the bag within the crowd of walkers. Then, it was in my sights before the sheriff could respond to Glenn's question. 

It lied next to the hoard of walkers tearing the horse into shreds. Their backs were facing the weapons but I wasn't not stupid enough to believe that I could slip in and out silently. There's too many stragglers wandering about and those fuckers happen to be exceedingly fast. 

I racked my brain for some sort of solution because I refused to leave without those guns. Otherwise, we'd all be risking our lives for nothing. The supply run would be a complete fail, everyone at the camp would likely starve soon anyway, and we'd only become walker meat.

"Jump off the right side of the tank, keep going in that direction," Glenn finished explaining as I tuned back in. "There's an alley up the street, maybe 50 yards. Be there."

There. I spotted a rooftop not too far from ours and I was willing to bet I could make the jump. 

Before Glenn can turn around, I set off on a mad dash, sprinting without a second thought so I couldn't psych myself out. 

"Daphne!" Glenn yelled.

My feet left the ground and I was flying over the alleyway towards a building mere feet away from the tank. I scraped my knees as I hit the concrete safely.

I spun around squinted my eyes against the sun. "Glenn! I'll catch up with you. I swear-- just get this guy to our spot and wait for me there. I'll be in and out, I promise." It was a big thing to make a promise in this world. I hoped I wouldn't have to break it

His face twisted in frustration; he was caught between following me and rushing down the fire escape to meet with the stranger. 

I gave him a reassuring nod. "Go!"

"If you die, I'm gonna kill you," he threatened. 

"Sure, right back at you," I saluted and then practically slid down my own fire escape. 

Thankfully, the majority of the walkers were still huddled around the horse or turning to face their attention towards where the man was finally leaving the tank. 

If I had had more time, I would've take a better look at him-- the asshole who Glenn and I were risking our lives for-- but this was my only chance. I tried to swallow down my fear and with one deep breath, I let go of the yellow railings. My feet propelled me forward and I was sprinting toward the flesh fest that laid before me.

The only things in my vision were the large black duffle bag and the long-range guns abandoned right next to them.

It was taking everything in me to hold back my screams-- I tend to scream over anything really-- and I nearly scrape all the skin off my knees trying to grab the bags off the ground as quickly as humanly possible. The growls suddenly got louder and I could tell without looking that a few of the walkers climbing the tank set their sights on me.

"Fuck!" I yelped as one of the walkers suddenly turned around from the horse group and made a wild grab at me. Its decayed fingers nearly latched onto my arm and I tripped over my own feet, underestimating the weight of the man's stash.

I wildly kicked out, thankfully hitting it right in the chest and back into the group it came from. I didn't give myself the chance to look back; I took the only opportunity I had left and hauled ass. Tearing through the sidewalk, I pushed back as many of the walkers as I can, narrowly avoiding their snapping teeth by the grace of God. 

I clutched my knife and pushed my legs faster than before, seeing the building Glenn was likely waiting at. Some selfish part of me felt relieved that most of the geeks were distracted by the fleeing stranger, whom I could see had a sheriff's uniform, and then even more so when he started firing his handgun at the walkers far ahead of him. 

That kind of noise would attract more walkers, sure, but not to me. 

I should've felt guilty but that stopped happening after the first week of civil collapse. 

Adrenaline pushed me past the horrifying sight of triple the walkers I'd seen back at the tank. Even though I could hear their footsteps following behind me, my brain had somehow come to shut off the emotional wreck inside my head. 

It was part of what made me a good detective. I could flip the switch quick. 

A sudden grip yanked me back and I whipped around to find a walker right on me, pulling at the duffle bag with a concerning amount of strength. He must've died very recently. I gritted my teeth and swung the hunting knife at its face. His decaying skin sliced like old leather and I grimaced at the pus that oozed from the wound. The walker let go of the bag but just as quickly came lurching at me again. I was ready this time, stabbing him right between his eyes and yanking back before coming face-to-face with another. 

My throat started to clam up and I was panting, shoving my knife into walker after walker that came running. I got a small break and started running again, searching for any sign of that sheriff. 

I hoped he's alive and this wasn't a total waste. My odds of survival were growing devastatingly slim. 

The street kept filling up but I was almost at the emergency exit, bypassing the alley the sheriff must've met Glenn at without a glance. I could see from my peripheral that it was saturated with the dead. I couldn't afford to grieve, if Glenn was amongst that group. Not now. Not while there's still a chance I could get these weapons back to Shane. 

I'm twisting around the corner of the west side of the building, heart pounding as if it's going to give out at any moment, and I see my salvation feet away—

The ground beneath me disappears and I'm sent tumbling towards the ground. I yell in pain, gravel digging through my clothes. A walker collapses onto me. Its teeth snap at me far too close to comfort, flesh hanging off the tip of its nose, blood dried up around its exposed cheekbones. 

Horror paralyzes me and I tense up in anticipation for the bite-- BANG!

My eyes squeezed shut and I thanked any force that was listening when the walker suddenly fell limp, nearly crushing me. I sprung back up to my feet after frantically pushing the cadaver aside, quickly searching for the source of my salvation. 

I found it on the rooftop I had abandoned mere minutes ago. 

It was a delightfully familiar face; his hair was a bit longer than I remembered and his face was covered in mud. A stark contrast from the last time I'd seen Rick Grimes. A fleeting feeling of elation burst in my chest at the sight of him. 

He was staring at me from behind a pistol and I couldn't tell if he recognized me too and I had no time to decipher it because a chorus of growls reminded me just how deep in shit I was. 

I took off towards the door and yanked it open, slamming it shut behind me. I spotted the stairwell and took three steps at a time, climbing higher and higher until I saw Glenn just a few flights away. His footsteps thundered in time with a second set-- Rick's.

His eyes found mine, making my heart skip a beat.

"Daph! Go ahead! Go, go, go!" Glenn rushed, breaking my connection with the deputy. I breathed heavily and stepped back into the game. I felt an overwhelming sense of security with my best friend behind me and it slowly started to sink in how lucky I was to be alive.

I was rushing down the same steps I came up, passing the level I'd entered through and finding myself below ground level, daylight pouring in through the open tunnel of the parking garage. My heart pummeled at the sight of walkers in our path of escape.

All three of us froze. 

The door across the way opened suddenly and out came Morales and T-Dog, decked in protective gear and wielding two large poles they must've found somewhere in the building.

They each took on a walker, smacking the sticks into their heads until they were both on the ground in bloody heaps.

I rushed into the scene, jumping over one of the dead geeks and dragging Glenn behind me by the wrist.

"Come on!" I yelled. 

"Morales, let's go!" I faintly heard as I landed in Jacqui's arms. She stabilized me; I'd ran in with too much momentum and had half the sense to let go of Glenn before sending him barreling into the woman as well. 

The door slammed shut behind us and I heard a gun click dangerously.

"Son of a bitch! We oughta kill you!" Andrea growled. She shoved Rick against some pallets. 

"Just chill out, Andrea. Back off," Morales defended.

"Ease up," Jacqui said.

I stared at the scene with wide eyes, trying to gather my wits. Shane's gun was firmly pointed between Rick's eyes and I regretted giving this hothead a weapon. 

"You're kidding me right? We're dead because of this stupid asshole!"

"Andrea, I said back the hell off," Morales said slowly, hovering over the blonde.

I wasn't too nervous, Andrea could barely aim a shooting dart and besides, the safety was still on.

"Pull the fucking trigger if you're going to, Harrison," I said sarcastically. I could clearly see Rick's eyes flickering between the safety and Andrea's horrible posture. It was just as clear to him that she had absolutely no idea what she was doing.

This seemed to break her out of her foolish act and she lowered the gun with a look of utter despair.

"We're dead," she moaned. "All of us..." She fixed Rick with a harsh glare. "Because of you."

I couldn't really argue with her there. The sight of him was making me a bit nervous, the stupid feelings I had for him bubbling to the surface but I tried to force them back down, even if his presence made me act like a goddamn fool most of the time. Now wasn't the time to indulge in a stupid unreciprocated crush on a resuscitated, married man. 

Rick scanned the rest of the group and his gaze hung over me a second longer than the rest. "I don't understand."

"Look, we came into the city to scavenge supplies. You know what the key to scavenging is? Surviving. You know what the key to surviving is? Sneaking in and out. Tiptoeing. Not shooting you the streets like it's the O.K. Corral." Morales said while shoving Rick to the front of the department store. We all followed quickly.

"Every geek from miles around heard you popping off rounds," T-Dog explained. I saw the shock flicker through Rick's expression as he looked out the large glass windows into the streets of the city. 

"He— he saved my life," I spoke up in his defense. "One of those bullets saved my life, guys."

It might not have counted for much, seeing as our prospects of survival were virtually vanishing before our eyes but at least maybe Rick wouldn't die the most hated man in the room. "So we could get this," I waved the duffel bag before the group and I got a simultaneous gasp of surprise.

T-Dog and Morales rushed forward, looking at the contents with a new sense of hope. 

"It doesn't matter," Andrea panicked. "You just rang the dinner bell."

She looked at Rick as she said this but I was hoping she spared a glance toward me so I could give her a nasty glare.

"He gets the picture," Morales threw back at Andrea. He was still rummaging through the ammo like a child in a candy store.

I glanced at Rick to find him staring at the windows in horror. I followed his gaze and saw a large rock in the clutches of a walker. It was banging it against the glass. Glenn rushed to my side.

"What were you doing out there anyway?" Andrea asked.

"Trying to flag the helicopter."

I shot him a crazy look. 

"Helicopter?" T-Dog scoffed. "Man, that's crap. Ain't no damn helicopter."

"You were chasing a hallucination. Imagining things. It happens," Jacqui tried to deny politely.

"I saw it," asserted Rick. He looked at me as if asking for backup.

I shook my head.

Morales ignored the whole thing. "Hey, T-Dog, try that C.B. Can you contact the others?"

"Others?" Rick interrupted. He was starting to remind me of a lost puppy. "The refugee center?"

I couldn't sit around and listen to this bullshit any longer, my survival instinct was kicking in at full speed with every bang on the windows. "Where the fuck is Dixon?"

Not that I cared about that fucker... it was too civil right now... despite the ongoing conflict, Merle's obnoxious two-cents were very obviously missing and I feared what he would do without supervision...

As if on cue, a loud gunshot fired from above us.

"Great," I slapped a palm to my hairline.

"Oh no, is that Dixon?" Andrea fretted. 

"I got no signal," T-Dog banged the walkie against his leg. I was already running toward the rooftop access, angered beyond words and I hoped Glenn was on my trail because I needed someone to hold me back from slapping Merle Dixon into next week.

"What is that maniac doing?!" Someone yelled from behind me. 

Hot with fury, I burst through the rooftop door, immediately catching sight of the asshole with his rifle shooting wildly at the street.

"Hey, Dixon, are you crazy?!" Morales screamed.

"Put that shit down! You're attracting more of them!" I demanded, fighting against Glenn's firm grip on my shirt. 

"Hey! You oughta to be more polite to a man with a gun!" Merle smirked and pointed the rifle at me. He jumped off the edge and strolled towards us with that insufferable expression on his face. "Only common sense."

"I know you of all people aren't talking about common sense," I said nastily.

Merle pointed the gun at me dangerously.

"Man, you're wasting bullets we ain't even got!" T-Dog yelled. "And you're bringing even more of them down on our ass! Man, just chill!"

"Bad enough I got these two taco-benders on my ass all day!" He waved the gun at Morales and I dangerously. "Now I'm gonna take orders from you, 'Mr. Yo?'"

"You can take your white supremacist bullshit and shove it up your ass, you racist dick," I broke free from Glenn and put a hand on Morales's shoulder, pulling him away from Dixon. 

"It's just the new world order, baby! I'm reinforcing what should've been done a long time ago. You—" he pointed at me. "Your kind." He spat. "You should've been the first to go!"

He made a move at me.

Within the next second, there was a flurry of commotion. I was dragged a few paces back by a hand on my waist.

Glenn was standing in front of me protectively and Rick had jumped over the pole that separated us. 

T-Dog swung his fist at Dixon and the asshole ducked and slammed the butt of the rifle into his nose.

"Mother—"

Rick came flying towards Dixon next, face red in anger and I was shocked— wondering what had set him off so aggressively. Dixon was quick on his feet, for a crackhead at least, punching Rick before he could try to break up the fight and sending him flying over the pole.

I would've laughed at the dramatics if I weren't fighting against Glenn.

It was only a matter of time before this happened— Merle Dixon had been nothing but a racist prick since the moment he set foot in our camp. 

T-Dog recovered quickly and ran at him again, only to get kicked in the chest and thrown headfirst into the metal pole. Blood marked the spot his head collided with.

"Stop! Dixon, you're gonna hurt him!" Andrea had been screaming since the start. 

I broke free from Glenn, just as Morales was punched in the stomach. I went to grip onto the collar of Dixon's shirt and he swung an arm in my direction; his handgun was pointing right at my head.

"Stop this madness!" Andrea cried. "No, no, no. Please!"

I stared at him wide-eyed, trying to calculate the level of crazy in his eyes right now.

He kept switching his aim from me to T-Dog.

I heard Glenn breathing heavily behind me. I didn't dare move a muscle.

T-Dog was looking at me with a desperate look. I was silent for a minute— everyone too fearful to even breathe the wrong way.

Dixon let a smile spread from cheek to cheek. "Yeah, alright!" He looked mighty chum. "We're gonna have ourselves a little powwow, huh?"

He spat and then rose from his knees. "Talk about who's in charge!"

He raised his gun in a power stance and I took the chance to drop to my knees next to T-Dog. Glenn and Jacqui rushed to our sides, Andrea pulling at T-Dog's arms and creating some distance.

"Democracy time, y'all!"

What I would give to break his fucking nose. But with that gun waving wildly in the air, I couldn't risk it.

"Someone's gotta be in charge around here! I vote me! Let's take a vote. Raise of hands? Anybody?"

Nobody moved until Dixon raised the gun threateningly.

I watched Morales raised his hand slowly. There was movement beside me and I quickly turned to glare at Glenn. He gave me an apologetic look and I understood he was just trying to keep us alive.

Dixon noticed the nasty look on my face. "You— I'm quite sick of you. I imagine where you come from, you wouldn't know anything about democracy, would you? I said, raise of fucking hands," he pointed the handgun at me.

I didn't move. His finger curled over the trigger.

"Anybody else?" Dixon snarled.

"Yeah," Rick appeared behind him and slammed the discarded rifle against his temple. Dixon falls to the ground with a thud and Rick is quick on his feet, slamming a boot against his right arm and fishing a pair of handcuffs from his back pocket. Dixon grunts as he fights against Rick's knee.

Rick turned his chin towards us, his left cheek beginning to swell. "Ayala, help me out here."

It took me half a second to comprehend his words but I rushed into action as soon as I realized he was talking to me. I'd seen this sort of procedure a few times on the field, when criminals got a bit handsy in the detainment process. It was funny to think the last officer I'd seen in this type of action before all this started was Rick Grimes himself. Working alongside him felt natural as I slipped back into my old routine, discarding any weapons Dixon could reach for and, in this case, pocketing them instead of storing them in evidence bags. 

"Who the hell are you, man?!" Dixon snarled.

Pulling him up by the collar, Rick got right in his face. "Officer Friendly," he snarled back with just as much contempt.

"Look here, Merle. Things are different now. There's none of that foolish shit that came out of your mouth. No dumb-as-shit, inbred white-trash fools either. Only us and the dead. The only way we survive this is by pulling together, not apart."

Captivated, I watched Rick load up the handgun he pulled from his belt.

Dixon rolled his eyes. "Screw you, man."

"I can see you make a habit of missing the point."

"Yeah? Well, screw you twice."

Rick seemed to snap, suddenly pressing the gun against Dixon's temple and cocking it. He leaned over him menacingly and it was so unlike the composure I'd seen from him over the years.

"You ought to be polite to a man with a gun," he threw Dixon's words right back at him. "Only common sense."

I swallowed thickly. My throat had suddenly become dry for some reason.

"You wouldn't. You're a cop."

"All I am anymore is a man looking for his wife and son. Anybody that gets in the way of that is gonna lose. I'll give you a moment to think about that." 

Dixon was finally silenced. Rick went through his shirt pockets and pulled out a stash of cocaine. "Got some on your nose there," he mocked, flicking Dixon's nose.

"What're you gonna do? Arrest me?" Dixon snickered but it quickly stopped when Rick tossed the drugs over the edge. "Hey! What're you doing, man?! That's my stuff! HEY!"

"If I get loose, you better fucking pray— HEY! You hear me, you filthy pig?!"

"Yeah, your voice carries," said Rick tiredly as he finally walked away.

I ignored the asshole and rushed after the deputy. He side-eyed me as I leaned beside him on the edge, facing him completely as he overlooked the city. His hands were shaking slightly.

"How?" He spoke first. I furrowed my eyebrows. 

"I thought you were dead. I thought everyone was dead. I went back to the station," Rick explained.

"That's where you got the guns," I nodded at the bag he had swung over his shoulder again.

He pressed his lips in a line. His eyebrows were drawn together and he looked exhausted. 

"I'm sorry. I—" a chuckle left my lips. "I didn't think you remembered me."

I couldn't help it. It was digging at me since the moment he called my name as if we were back on the field. 

Of course I always noticed Rick Grimes but I didn't think he ever noticed me. From the amount of people he had to work with in his career at King County PD, I had to be the most minuscule irrelevant part of his job. 

Rick stared at me with an unreadable expression. His lips parted in response—

"You're not Atlanta PD," Morales joined us. "Where you from?"

"Up the road a ways," responded Rick. He was trying to read my face. Maybe he was trying to figure out whether he should expose our past or not. Smart.

"Well, Officer Friendly, from up the road a ways. Welcome to the big city."

Morales patted my shoulder and I gave Rick one more pointed glance.

"How's that signal, T-Dog?" I asked, joining the group again. Merle gave me a nasty glare. I ignored him.

"Like Dixon's brain— weak."

I smirked in amusement. 

"Keep trying," insisted Morales.

"Why?" said Andrea. "There's nothing they can do. Not a damn thing."

"Got some people outside the city is all," Morales explained to Rick. I got a jolt of realization and quickly placed a hand on Rick's shoulder. He turned towards me, confused, and I barely gave him time to cooperate before dragging him to the other end of the rooftop. I wouldn't want Dixon hearing this.

"Rick, listen... Lori, Carl—"

"Are they okay? Are they safe?" He asked desperately. I placed a hand on his shoulder, which probably didn't help because the panic in his eyes seemed to increase tenfold.

"They're safe—" I told him quickly. Relief flooded into his eyes. "God, you won't believe this. They're at our camp. Shane Walsh, he's with them too—"

His arms pulled me in, his face burying itself in the crook of my neck and I could only accept it limply. My arms were glued to my sides by his tight grip. He was warm and smelled like sandalwood.

I snuck a glance over his shoulder at Glenn. He was staring at us, confused as everfuck, and I knew once he realized exactly who Rick Grimes was, he'd be having a field day with this.

"Oh God, thank you," breathed Rick. He squeezed me one last time before pulling away with a shaky smile. "And you— how did you all end up together?"

The way he said 'you' caused a twist in my gut, partly from confusion but also from the stupid feelings I thought had been squashed away months ago.

"Guys! We need some ideas here!" Morales interrupted once again, waving us over and cutting our conversation short.

"I'll explain everything soon. I promise," I placed a hand on his bicep and then walk away, feeling his eyes on my back.

It was embarrassing how fast my heart was beating, the way I was overthinking the movement of my hips. My entire body buzzed with the aftershock of having Rick's body suddenly pressed against mine mere seconds ago...

And all I could think about was the fact that Rick Grimes was about to become a part of my new life.

next chapter...

[roseinthewindow]

Epilogue: Chapter 2.

Imani’s POV- Maddy’s Apartment.

“Do you ever think about leaving Elliot, like seriously?” Maddy asked, as I shrugged. “You didn’t leave Nate for a really long time, even though people were telling you to.” I answered, almost completely dodging her question. She’s quiet for a minute, as I fiddled with my phone. “Imani, that’s nowhere near the same thing. You’re allowing someone to drain you when you can easily leave.” She explained, and I shook my head.

“Maddy, I didn’t come here for a lecture. I just came here to relax.” I sighed, as she nodded. “I get that, I’m sorry.” She agreed, sitting next to me on her couch. “I just worry about you sometimes girl, that’s all.” She noted, hugging me from the side.

The next few hours of hanging out went smoothly, mostly us just talking and taking shots. I ended up stumbling back into my own apartment, giggling like a schoolgirl. Once I walked into my room, I saw Elliot fast asleep in my bed. Sighing, I sat on the edge of the bed, feeling him shift as he woke up.

“Y’know, breaking and entering is a crime.” I joked, noticing that his signature smile was missing. “Not a crime if you gave me a key.” He replied, his tone cold. He’s curled on the right side of the bed, quiet as a mouse now. I walked over, kneeling to his level.

“What’s the matter, El?” I asked, as he shook his head. “I don’t wanna blow my high.” He muttered, and I exhaled. “Do you need anything from me?” I inquired, seeing him reach out for me. I got into the bed, and he immediately laid on me. “You’re more comfortable than your bed.” He teased, as I giggled softly. “I’ll be sure to tell my manufacturer your feedback.” I said, rubbing his back.

“How was Maddy’s place?” He asked, as I went silent for a few moments. “It was alright, we took shots.” I answered, and he looked up at me. “Mhm, you hesitated mani.” He pointed out, as I kissed his head. “I don’t wanna blow your high.” I said, using his words to get out of it. “Mkay.” He replied, laying his head back on my chest.

“Do you like me?” He asked, his voice quiet. “You wouldn’t be on my chest if I didn’t.” I answered, feeling his body shift. “No I mean, do you like me as a person? Like who I am?” He questioned, as I looked at him. “If who you are is smart, and funny, but occasionally a pain in my ass, then I love who you are.” I said, and he looked up at me.

He’s quiet, and I could practically hear the gears in his head turning as I kissed his forehead. “If somebody doesn’t like you, fuck em.” I mumbled, trying to comfort him. He laid back on my chest, silently falling asleep.

I stayed awake for two hours, not being able to shake the feeling that something happened at home, that it was the reason he’d asked that question. The temptation to wake it up and drag it out of him was strong, but I resisted. Sighing, I forced myself to go to sleep.

Elliot’s POV- Morning

I woke up, seeing Imani fiddling with her phone before looking at me. “Good morning sleepyhead.” She said, smiling at me. “Morning.” I mumbled, as she rubbed my cheek. “Do you gotta work today?” She asked, getting a head shake from me.

“Probably gonna chill and hit up that party later with Rue. You coming?” I inquired, as she shrugged. “If Maddy goes, I’ll probably end up going. I got a paper due in a couple days.” She explained, and I nodded. I leaned into her more, being quiet for a minute.

“What happened last night?” She probed, rubbing my back. “Just shit with my dad. It’s not a big deal.” I sighed, feeling her shift. “It’s a big deal if it made you upset enough to just come and be in my bed, Elliot.” She said, her voice raising slightly. I’m quiet for a few minutes, letting the silence set in.

“That guy fucking hates me. I feel like no matter what I do, that’s never gonna change.” I stated, feeling my eyes water. Admitting that makes me feel like my chest is going to cave in, and I hate that. It gives him more power than I want him to have.

Imani’s silent, but I didn’t feel like I was done talking. “If the person who’s half responsible for me being on this earth doesn’t like me, then why should anybody else? It just doesn’t make fucking sense.” I rambled, getting off her bed. I felt angry, the emotion heightened by the fact that I’m sober.

“You probably don’t like me either, I know you don’t!” I exclaimed, and she stood up. “Elliot.” She called, slowly making her way to my side of the room. “I pay the fucking bills, I make sure that both of them can eat and all they fucking care about are the drugs! That’s it!” I yelled, shoving a vase off her desk.

It hit the ground as I curled into a ball next to the shards. I’m sobbing, my chest tight. Imani’s trying to approach me, and my grip on myself tightens. I feel like I’m not thinking, as if everything’s simply blending in and mushing together. Imani’s arms are wrapped around me, bringing me back down to earth.

“I got you, you’re okay.” She whispered, holding me tightly. It’s quiet for a bit, the sound of my labored breathing breaking it. “I’m just tired.” I mumbled, curling up against her. She’s quiet, just rubbing my back.

I have no idea how I went from that, to sitting at a party with a blunt hanging from my mouth. The music is blaring around me, filling my thoughts just like the smoke filled my lungs. Suddenly, a blonde girl appeared next to me, her eyes studying me.

“I’m not sharing.” I muttered, taking another puff and blowing smoke through my nose. “Good thing that I wasn’t asking.” She replied, pulling out a pill and swallowing it. I didn’t say anything, focusing on myself.

“You’re Elliot. Imani’s boyfriend, right?” She asked, and I looked at her again. I’ve never even seen her before, especially not with Imani. “You know, you’re really invested in my business.” I snarked, taking my blunt out of my mouth. “I can’t be well versed in the good looking guys in our community?” She responded, a small smirk on her verse.

“Take me off your list, blondie.” I said, turning my attention away. Imani walked over, her demeanor shifting when she saw the girl. “Julianna…didn’t think you were still in San Francisco.” She noted, sitting next to me.

“Just Jules now, I don’t go by my full name.” She said, taking a sip from her cup. Imani did the same, smiling a bit. “Ah, but those breaking and entering charges still follow you.” She retorted, her head resting on my shoulder. Jules was silent, using my arm to pull herself off the couch. “It was nice meeting you, Elliot.” She said, walking away. Imani kissed my cheek, and I put my blunt back into my mouth, lighting it.

End Of Chapter 2

[thessalian]

Thess vs the Sons of Prometheus

Had to leave off last night because the migraine was too bad to start in on the hyperfocus. Feeling somewhat better today, so I figured to just get a few side quests going.

Right. Runda's Rollerback salvage. And then maybe I'll go do Handa's stuff because it feels unfair. Granted, Runda really needed help whereas Handa's just ... erm ... Handa, but y'know. Fairness in all things? I guess?

Oh. Except if I'm really being fair, I should probably check on that rebel camp the delvers have been on about.

This is ... actually useful. Show myself juuuuuuuuuust enough to lead people out of camp, and then shoot them when they're out in the open. I am such an ambush predator.

Only problem is knowing exactly how much or how little is "showing myself juuuuuuuuuuuuuust enough" because now I'm in melee. Oh, fuck you, rebel shithead.

...I ... do not know how I did that thing where I rammed Aloy's knee into her attacker's face but I doubt I will be able to repeat it. No matter how much I want to. This is part of why fighting games will never be my thing. Well, that and the fibro.

And we're in the camp and ... where is everybody else? Oh. Right. I lured them all outside and killed them.

...Oooooooh, so this is how they're overriding machines. I mean, respect to them for figuring out that whole deal of pulling remote override cores out of Corrupters and then trapping machines with the intent of performing surgery on them, but still, yeesh. Also they can't be doing very well at this if there are this many machine corpses lying around.

Welp. No more of you. Stabby-stabby.

Okay. So. Where is everybody else?

Ah. There's like three of them behind this wall. How do I get in?

Oh. Okay. Gate.

And you ... and you ... aaaaaaaand you. Sorry, Son of Prometheus sniper; I am a waaaaaay better sniper than you. Now. Let's have a look.

Focus that I need to deal with back at base. Right. Okay. I had to go back there for a couple of bits and pieces of quest anyway. I guess this is important enough to drag me back there fairly soon.

Also ... can I just pretend in my head that the Oseram going along with this were just caught by the possibilities of the tech, and aren't blatantly evil? I usually like the Oseram.

...Well, there was Ulvund. Like I said; usually.

.........Maybe if I tell Erend about this, he can crack some Oseram heads and tell them to stop being shitheads. That'd be nice.

Anyway. Rollerback salvage. If I actually have to kill a Rollerback for this, I'm going to be pissed.

Oh. Okay. So it's just picking salvage out of a field and--

OFUCKSHELLSNAPPER DODGEROLLDODGEROLLDODGEROLL!

Right. So much for you, you subterranean pain in my ass. Now. ROLLERBACK. SALVAGE. Plus some extra Shellsnapper bits.

Oooh. Shiny close-range bow. This will be useful when I've upgraded it a little more. I should put together a shopping list.

(Honestly I'm really glad that whatever arbitrary time limit I've been given to get main quest shit done isn't really worth beans. I'd hate to think I doomed the world because I was trying to help an Oseram lady win an armour contest and upgrade my gear Because Reasons.)

Okay. I should head in a Handa-ward direction, but again I'm going for campfires and ... oh. Ruins. I should check those.

If there's a metal flower in there I am going to scream and punch things.

Nope. Just Firegleam. Now ... how am I doing this?

Huh. We're playing with water physics today, are we? Okay. A-swimming we will go.

Y'know, I didn't even look at what symbols this stupid holo-whatever was giving off. I have ceased to care. I am soggy and I would like out of the water hole, please.

(Why can't we go tell Drakka that, hey, if they want to go south a ways, there's a whole flooded ruin that might be a source of potable water while they wait for the Wound to fill up again? This feels like a waste.)

Right. More campfires and ... okay, that Thunderjaw looks upset. Oh, look, Oseram are baiting it again. Lemme see what I can do about this.

STOP. MOVING. NO. STOP. YOU ARE GETTING IN THE WAY OF MY SHOT-- uhoh.

SO glad I'm getting better at dodge-rolling. Smoke-bomb, dodge-roll, INTO the bush I go.

Okay. There. That's dealt with. Oseram, STOP BAITING THE THUNDERJAWS. YOU ARE OUT OF YOUR DEPTH.

What's all this now? Oh. Rebels. It's dark, I'm stealthy, and you're all doomed. Bye, rebels!

Ooh. Spikesnout. I can always use bits from them.

Okay. Just going to collect this shelter, because shelters are awesome and it's the best place to pause for the day. Though I should consider going back to Base later to drop shit off, and also to a settlement to dump some vendor trash.

Also I need to see if I can upgrade anything-- Huh. One upgrade on the shiny purple short-range bow. What do I need for upgrade 2? Ah. Greenshine cluster. I have fragments and slivers a-plenty, but no clusters. Lemme check my map.

Okay, new order of proceedings. Stop game, have food, see how much time I have before D&D, and then possibly go hunt up that greenshine cluster up in the mountains to the east.

I have more to-do lists for my video games than I do for my Being A Motherfucking Adult sometimes and it's weird. Ah well. At least it's more fun. And takes up fewer spoons.

On that note, food.

[loiswolf]

Day 1 May 24 2023 Anchorage-Palmer 74kms

Hi again everyone! Today I started my cycling tour from Anchorage Alaska.

First a little background info. I left home on May 13th and flew to Vancouver. May 15th I boarded the Norwegian Jewel to sail to Seward. This was not quite as simple as boarding the Queen Mary 2 last year. I booked and paid for the cruise early this year. A few weeks ago I was informed Shirley would not be welcome on board. Meh! I decided to bring her anyway and try to sneak her on in a box….wrapped in black plastic to unsuccessfully disguise the fact that I had a bike.

All seemed to go well at the dock. The box had a sticker with my cabin number slapped on it and was wheeled away with the rest of the luggage. When Shirley failed to appear by 9pm that night I informed the service desk that she was missing. Security claimed they didn’t have her, so an all night search of the Jewel was made by some anxious staff. I convinced myself that she had been left on the dock and made plans to return to Vancouver when the cruise ended, before finally falling asleep late that night.

However, Shirley was found and delivered to my cabin the next morning at 8:30am. Yay! Security made a couple of attempts to get her back ( she had been sent to confiscated items) but they were in such a lot of trouble for causing a huge search that they gave up pretty quickly. No way I was giving her back!!

Apart from the anxious start the cruise was very enjoyable. I made lots of friends immediately and enjoyed a balcony cabin this time. It was really worth the extra cost as the scenery was spectacular and it was light until almost midnight.

There was plenty of time to enjoy the view.

I didn’t go on any arranged shore excursions since I didn’t enjoy them at all last year. I was happy to walk around the towns ( which seemed to be 90% jewellery shops ) and at Juneau climbed to the top of the mountain.

The cruise ended at Seward early in the morning and I had to fill in the day until the train to Anchorage left at 6pm. It turned out not to be a problem. Everyone wanted to talk to me when I was disembarking and getting around town on Shirley.

However, I was glad to board the train as the wind had blown up and it was absolutely freezing in the afternoon. It even snowed while I was in Subway having lunch/dinner.

We reached Anchorage at 10pm. Fortunately it was a lot warmer there and I only had a 10 minute ride to reach my Airbnb. Easy!

I’d booked 2 nights so I had a whole day in Anchorage to explore.

First stop was a bike shop to get a couple of things on Shirley tweaked. Then I rode a huge loop on a bike track around the coast and back into the city stopping at Walmart for supplies and REI for some bear spray. Yep! It’s a new addition to Shirley’s luggage, but something I was advised to carry. I’m not sure I’d be able to get the safely catch off in time to actually spray a bear if I had to but I guess it’s better than nothing.

The whole city is surrounded by either water or huge snow-covered mountains. It’s beautiful to look at.

So finally today I mounted Shirley and we began our journey.

I headed up to the Glenn Highway as that was the only road. Of course there was a sign banning cyclists. I didn’t realise there was a path on the other side of the highway but no-one tooted and the police didn’t stop me. It was very noisy and busy so I was happy to take the alternate paths when they were available further down the road.

Eagle River was a town about 30kms out so I stopped at McDonald’s for a coffee and hotcakes. I had plenty of time so I enjoyed reading a blog by some friends who are currently cycling in Spain and now Morocco. It’s alway fun to hear how they are facing the same frustrations I did when I cycled there years ago.

It was raining when I left so I dragged out all the rain gear and put it on there where I was able to sit out of the rain. It probably wasn’t necessary because the rain stopped soon after. The clown pants are pretty cosy anyway so I left them on.

I was on and off the highway for the next 20kms when I stopped just before this bridge ( can’t see the bridge but this is a photo I took from the bridge)

I ate some biscuits before mounting Shirley again for the last stretch into Palmer. You would think with all the mountains around I would have had to do a lot of climbing but apparently that will be happening tomorrow. Today was pretty flat.

I am staying in a lovely Airbnb very close to the centre of town. It has everything I need and is perfect. Unfortunately tomorrow will be a different story. I am staying in a very rustic cabin which is classified as “camping”. 😞. I have even been advised to take my own water! There will probably be no internet so don’t assume I have been eaten by a bear if I can’t post my blog.

The photo above is of the view from the back of my Airbnb at 8:45pm. Don’t know why it went there.

[the-baddest-of-batches]

Star Wars: Dar'Aliit - Chapter One: Beginning of the End (Part 2)

“Kian!” Morgan hops down off the top bunk and lands square on his feet. I can hear the overexcitement in his voice already and it makes me want to go back to sleep. My head is heavy and fuzzy from all the sleepless nights anyway.

Morgan does not give me a chance to succumb back to slumber, though. “Kian, get up!” He’s hauling his gear out. They all are. I’m still the only one in bed. Someone climbs up and taps my shoulders harder than they should. Five credits I’ll bet it was Nyo.

“Up,” Nyo’s deep voice whispers to me. “We’re expected on deck in thirty.”

I shove him off and the momentum is what gets me up and onto my shebs as I blink my eyes.

“If I didn’t know better, I’d say you weren’t excited for our first mission,” Morgan chides. He’s tugging his sniper rifle over his shoulder. He’s already in armor.

Thirty minutes. I remind myself of the deadline and somehow my boots are on the ground before I think. Morgan is right. Today’s our first mission. I should feel excited but I’ve been sleeping with a sick feeling in my gut for days.

I know it’s probably nerves. Everyone gets nervous, right? Even trained and hardened soldiers like us. Well—I scan the room full of the faces of my brothers, each a carbon copy of the last, except our hair of course, and each beaming in excitement—we aren’t hardened soldiers yet. Just fresh faces.

Everyone is buzzing with adrenaline, though, so I smile and shrug off the icky knot in my stomach. I haul out my armor and dress, and with each plate it gets a little easier. Morgan’s entirely right and that makes me feel a bit lighter. Me, Morgan, Nyo, Nenti, Hook and Haze, we’re not going to be trainees anymore. These sleeping cells will become starship bunks and by this time tomorrow we’ll make landfall on strange new planet.

Then we’ll do what we always said we’d do.

Morgan probably notices my smile. He slings his arm over my shoulders as I join the group, each of us in shining white armor, weapons ready, faces beaming.

“You going to sleep through every mission?” Hook asks. “Or just the important ones.”

“We don’t even have a mission yet,” Nenti slams his fist into Hook’s shoulder. “Di’kut.”

I laugh and roll my eyes. “I won’t sleep through every mission,” I say. “Just the first one.”

“Hah!” Nenti busts out laughing. Nyo chuckles.

Haze levels his bright eyes on me and with a smirk says, “And I’ll bet if you did, you’d be the only survivor, Kian.”

#

Umbara. That name burns into my mind as we drag our sore battered bodies the rest of the way across the shadowy world. I’m struggling to breathe. Haze clings to Morgan, limping. Hook is okay. Nenti hadn’t been seen since we got shot down.

Nyo keeps beside me, quiet, like usual. I want to ask him what he is thinking, but I can’t get my voice to work. I fear if I open my mouth I’ll scream, or cry, or worse—I’ll be silent.

The past few hours have been nothing but hell. That is the only word appropriate left in my mind to describe them. It was supposed to be a simple mission. Land in the drop zone, take up our spots in the cover line and keep cover up until the Jedi arrived.

Nothing went right. First rule of training. Nothing ever goes according to plan. But this was worse.

I still couldn’t get the image of that face, my face, out of my head. The lifeless eyes. No helmet. Just a head.

I want to vomit. I’m going to vomit.

Nyo’s hand lands on my shoulder and I look over at him quiet.

“How far?” Haze asks weakly from behind us.

“Not far.” Nyo sounds like a real sergeant. A leader. But we’re all just rookies, nothing special, no leaders.

Still, he sounds like a leader. I wish I understood how he did it.

“C’mon,” Nyo’s talking to me now, his voice quiet. I can feel him guiding me with the touch of his hand. I’m walking in front soon enough and I can see the other clones in front of us. We’re all the same, bruised, beaten, and making our way through an unknown world. The blaster fire is behind us. I remember however the faces that weren’t clones: Jedi.

Nothing else can save us now.

A voice calls from the front and we’re told it’s not far. They’ve been saying that for hours. Maybe it isn’t far, but it feels forever in my head. I want to collapse. I want to lay down on the ground and close my eyes. I don’t want to wake up and face this tomorrow. This isn’t a training room. It isn’t a simulation. It’s real and it’s right here in front of me.

But with each thought of going back Nyo’s hand is heavier on my shoulder. It isn’t just me. We’re all here. We’re all the same.

So I keep walking, and breathing, and believing. It’s not far. We’re almost there.

#

The capitol city sits quiet. Everything remains dead quiet. Our training commander once said you shouldn’t trust silence.

But the captain told us to keep moving. Our platoon leader looks like he disagrees. I think Nyo does too. He’s still and alert. We all have blasters in our hands. We’re taking the capitol.

And we all know tis is a bad idea.

But we’re soldiers. Good soldiers. And we follow orders. Good soldiers win wars, and we’re going to win this battle, and the next battle, and eventually the war. That’s why we exist. Trust the plan, trust each other, and you’ll make it home.

I lift my blaster. I’m ready to be a good soldier.

Then the air explodes hot and loud and in a flash of green there’s a scream. I stop dead in my tracks.

“Mines!” Everyone is yelling.

I snap my blaster up, eyes scanning the shadows, but that’s all I can see. That and the body several feet away. Another mine. More screaming. Another body. I can’t look. I won’t look and instead I glance at Nyo.

“What do we do?” I know I sound panicked.

“No one move!” The captain orders.

I hold my breath and grip my blaster with shaking fingers, as if that’s enough to keep hell at bay. Every glance is a scan of our surroundings. The training commander was right. You should never trust silence.

But in just a few seconds, we’re back on the move. Cautiously, following an ARC trooper sweeping for mines ahead of us. I pick my way around every glowing spot, wondering if maybe it was possible to miss one, and if I’ll step on it next. The careful pace doesn’t last.

I don’t know if the sick feeling hit me first, or the smell of laser burnt flesh as a green flash took out the soldier in the platoon ahead of me. But I know the panic hit me last, sinking in as I jerked up my blaster and realized with a sinking stomach that the enemy fire was all around us, and there was nowhere to run from it.

“We’re caught!”

“We have no cover!”

“We’re completely exposed!”

Pandemonium. I fire back at anything that moves in the shadows, but the Umbarans are also just that, shadows. I cannot see what I’m shooting at! But I can hear the screaming, and the yelling, and the panic as men fall around me. Men who are just like me.

Our platoon leader yells for us to keep firing. I don’t know what else to do so I yell back, “Yes sir!” and let ‘em have it. I want the Umbaran’s to fall, I want them to feel the bite of my own blaster just like they’re biting down on us. I want to see their capitol burn.

It’s the sky that’s burning, though, and my nose. A sing of plasma on metal followed by the acrid smell of something unholy coming our way.

“Get out!” Our platoon leader shouts.

I see the white ball of plasma and I lunge to the right, forgetting the Umbaran’s and charging after Nyo as we run for cover that doesn’t exist.

I look back and my stomach hits the back of my throat. Haze isn’t fast enough.

“Haze!” I scream. I’m turning to grab him.

Nyo grabs me.

And with a scream the plasma lands, tearing through the ground, through Haze, and reducing him to atoms.

Haze is gone. Gone.

Nyo drags me back. “Keep firing, Kian!”

I can’t let go of my blaster, but my legs are weak. I’m going to vomit, but the adrenaline coursing in my veins won’t let me. We’re like womp rats in a barrel. I can see the other platoons running. It’s a hail of plasma and death. A trap.

“Fall back!” The captain is running past us, waving for us to follow. The platoon leader echoes the order and Nyo tugs me back.

I obey. We run and retreat. I leap after Nyo behind the carcass of an machine and we both set up cover fire. It’s the only thing I can focus on. Fire till the clip is empty, and reload.

With every bullet Haze’s scream echoes in my head. I can still see his face. I remember what he was like this morning. I remember his bad jokes on the LAAT/i.

But I can’t let myself remember right now. I pinpoint the enemy running after us. They’re out in the open now. They’re the womp rats. The targets I’ve trained all ten years of my life to hit.

And I hit them perfectly. One after another, falling to the ground. Empty a clip. Reload. It’s rhythmic.

“They’re caught!” someone whoops. “We can do this!”

“Take ‘em down!” Nyo almost sounds happy as he shouts beside me. “Let ‘em eat laser!”

I grimace and my gritted teeth become a grin. Yeah. Die like fodder.

The Umbaran’s are finally thinning out. I reload and slam the next cartridge into my blaster before mowing down another and I almost feel better, as if the fight is a catharsis. I feel like Haze would be proud of me. Of all of us. Nyo on my right, Morgan on my left, even Hook back with the wounded.

There’s reinforcements pouring down. I lose myself in picking off the last of the enemy and then without warning the world is quiet again. I can breathe again.

Morgan looks up and our platoon leader motions that it’s safe. We stand and survey the battlefield.

Morgan slaps my shoulder. “We did it,” he says, grim.

I nod.

“Regroup!” The orders trickle from above. I clamber over the debris and file in with the others as we rejoin our platoon. I feel like my head is still spinning but there’s an ecstasy mixed in. We survived.

Our first mission, and we haven’t even finished, but we’re alive. Most of us.

“I heard the General and the Captain are arguing again,” someone whispers.

Morgan looks over. “Are they ever gonna make up their minds?” he huffs. “We did great!”

“A full-frontal assault is still dangerous,” Nyo mutters. “You should be quiet, Morgan.”

Morgan huffs. Our platoon leader levels all of us with a helmeted glare and I’ve seen that look before.

Stay alert.

I keep my blaster in my hands.

“So, what is our next move?” Morgan asks. He pulls his helmet off to breathe. Nyo always hated when we did that. It got us killed in more than one training simulation.

“We still have to take the capitol,” I offer. “But maybe we can now?”

“I think the General is an idiot,” Nyo put’s in his two cents.

“You can say that twice,” Morgan says. “But hey, a little show of force isn’t so bad, right?” He lifts his blaster and pumps it in the air with a rallying cry. My eyes trail the blaster.

And I realize a little too late the world isn’t quiet anymore. The sky is filled with blaster fire. It’s coming from above. And we’re caught in it.

A green laser bolt cuts through Morgan’s face. And the last thing I see before it melts the skin is his determined smirk. Determined that we would win.

[l-e-e-woso]

Meeting The Fam - Leah Williamson

Please read notes at the bottom after reading.

Leah’s Mum = Amanda, Dad = David, Brother = Jacob 

————

The moment that you got in the car with Leah you were instantly nervous just thinking of where we were going, and Leah must have sensed that you were nervous, so she put on her spotify playlist before pulling out of the driveway. She placed her hand on my thigh as she started driving every so often, she took her hand off to change gears. 

“Are you nervous baby?” Leah asks me and you sighed because it feels stupid to be nervous to meet the four most important people in Leah’s life. But chuck me onto a huge stage in front of 90,000 people and you would be fine. 

“Yeah…I don’t get why I’m so nervous about this. I mean Jesus, I’ve sung in front of 90,000 people and I wasn't as nervous as I am right now.” You say chuckling to myself as you play with Leah fingers, it’s a nervous habit. 

“They will love you, trust me. You’ve talked to them before so calm down, you will be fine I promise you.” Leah says as she smiles at you and grabs your hand giving it a kiss while they were stopped at a red light. 

“Why don’t you try and get a little bit of sleep before we get there?” She says due to you not getting a lot of sleep last night because you were overthinking about today.

”Fineeee….” You say dragging the word out as you try to reach Leah’s jacket behind the seat so you could use it as a blanket. Once you finally find the jacket, you find that you're actually quite tired and fall asleep almost immediately. 

After forty-five minutes of Leah driving from her flat to her parents house in Milton Keynes they finally pulled into the driveway. 

Leah puts the handbrake on then reaches over to you to wake you up. Groaning you pull Leah towards you and cuddle up to her. Leah chuckles knowing that you're only like this when you are just starting to wake up or when you are over tired.

“Come on, I’m pretty sure you do not want to miss out on my Mum’s roast dinner. I may be biased but it’s amazing.” Leah chuckles as she kisses the top of your head before taking her jacket off of you so she could take it inside. 

Unfortunately, you have to get up from your rather comfortable position that you were in. “Okay. Let’s do this shit!” You said trying to hype yourself up to not be nervous to meet Leah’s family. “They will love you, okay? There’s nothing to be worried about.” Leah senses that you are a little nervous, so she tries to reassure you just a little bit.

Both of you get out of the car to get your bags out of the boot. “Babe, you brought my guitar?” You asked Leah, curious as to why she had brought it with them. “Yeah, I thought you could sing a song later, Jacob is a huge fan of your music and plus I think it’s hot when you play guitar.” Leah shrugs as she winks at you while walking towards her parent’s front door.

Following Leah with her thousands of bags that she brought for god knows what reason, you soon reach the front door and you take a deep breath to calm yourself down. Leah rings the doorbell since the door was locked so she couldn’t just walk straight in and almost straight away her Mum opens the door with a huge smile.

“You’re here! It’s so nice to finally meet you Y/n!” Amanda, Leah’s Mum, says excitedly and goes to hug you then stops because of all the bags you are holding. “Really Leah? How many bags do you need to stay for three days? Come on in dear.” Amanda steps aside to let you in so you can put the very heavy bags down and you walk in straight to what looked like a living room. 

Putting the bags down as quickly as possible because it was starting to cut off the blood circulation due to how heavy the bags were. You let out a sigh of relief and rub your hands together to try to get back some sort of feeling in them. Little did you know everyone was staring at you in amusement and then you looked up to see four sets of eyes on you.

“Ah sorry! So rude of me. It’s nice to finally meet you all Mr and Mrs Williamson and Jacob!” You blurt out nervously while still rubbing your hands and glancing around.

“Nice to meet you mate.” Jacob says walking over and dapping you up. Mr Williamson just gave you a handshake and Mrs Williamson gave you a hug.

“You two are in Leah’s old room, go put your bags up there and by then dinner should be ready. Please call me Amanda and him, David.” Amanda smiles at you and walks into the kitchen to finish off dinner.

You grab a few of the bags and follow Leah upstairs to her old bedroom. Once you get into the room you place the bags down and fall backwards onto the bed, you sigh in content. What you didn’t realise is that you started to fall asleep as Leah sorted out the bags, so they weren’t in the way. All of a sudden there was a weight on your waist. You open your eyes and look up to see the love of your life staring at you like you're the only person in the universe. Leah leans down while holding your face with one hand and the other supporting her weight. She looks you in the eyes all you could see was how much she adores you then she leans in and kisses you slowly with so much passion and love that it almost overwhelms you. You rub her thighs before resting your hands under her shirt on her lower back which causes Leah to whine and that makes you chuckle. 

“Baby we are not doing this while your parents and brother are downstairs!” This comment from you causes Leah to groan and collapse on top of you then she cuddles into you. “Fineee…but once we get back home, we are doing it on every single surface possible in the flat.” Leah smirks at you while wiggling her eyebrows.

“Sounds good to me.” You whip out your phone to take a picture with Leah and sit up against the headboard of the bed which causes Leah to move so she could cuddle you in a comfier position.

After posting to instagram you hear Amanda shout up at both of you and Leah to come downstairs because dinner is ready. The both of you get up quickly and race each other down the stairs which ends up with Leah stubbing her toe. “HA!” You shout at Leah then laugh at her clumsiness and kiss her cheek before going into the kitchen.

Three minutes later Leah limps into the kitchen making me look at her with wide eyes because obviously she really hurt her foot. “Do you have any frozen peas, Amanda?” You ask Leah’s Mum who quickly roots through her freezer and passes you the peas.

“Come on, you need to sit down.”  You wrap your arm around her helping her to sit on the sofa so she could elevate her foot and you place the frozen peas gently on her foot. 

Leah pulls you towards her and whispers in your ear. “I got you!” She gets up and starts jumping around while you sit there looking at Leah absolutely gobsmacked. You were more shocked that Leah had actually pulled a prank on you. “I thought you were injured, you melon!” You say to her playfully hitting her arm before returning the peas to the freezer.   

Eventually everyone sits down at the dinner table and god damn the roast dinner looks absolutely amazing. You start to eat your dinner while just having general chit chat with the rest of Leah’s family. Out of nowhere Leah’s Dad starts questioning you about every aspect of your life.

“So, Y/n, what do you do?” David asks plainly. You finish eating what you have in your mouth before replying to him. “I’m a singer. It’s actually how I met Leah. Two of her friends, Kiera and Lucy, hired me to sing at their wedding. Leah ended up spilling wine all over my shirt, so she gave me a spare shirt she had with her and her number. We got to talking, went on a lot of dates and now we’ve been dating for what two years now? We quarantined together as well.” You smiled fondly at Leah before giving her a kiss on the cheek.

“So, you don’t make much money then, as a singer?” David asks smugly and you just reply simply. “Actually, I have plenty of money. On average I earn about a million a year. That's mainly just brand deals. Each song I release I get £300 for which is about 40k, and I still have music coming out, so I get paid for that as well.” Leah looks between you and her Dad as you answer her Dad’s questions.

“What are your intentions with Leah?” David asks you curiously and eager to hear your response. “I intend to make her my wife at some point in the future and build our own family with each other. I love her with my whole heart and soul.” You say looking at Leah lovingly and with so much admiration. David nods his head in approval. 

-  time skip to after dinner -

Currently you are sitting in Leah’s bedroom tuning your guitar before heading downstairs. You take your coat that was hanging off the back of a chair and slip it on before heading outside to the small fire pit. 

You find an empty space next to Leah and she looks at you excited for you to play guitar as well as sing. “Guys! Y/n going to sing a song for us.” Leah says as she starts clapping from excitement. “YES!” Jacob shouts excitedly.

“Okay.” You clear your throat. “This is called How Do I Say Goodbye.” You start strumming the guitar, preparing yourself to start singing.

“Early morning

There's a message on my phone

It's my mother saying, "Darling, please come home"

I fear the worst

But how could you leave us all behind

There's so much to say but there's so little time

 So how do I say goodbye

To someone who's been with me for my whole damn life

You gave me my name and the colour of your eyes

I see your face when I look at mine

So how do I, how do I, how do I say goodbye?”

 While singing this verse you start to tear up from the overwhelming emotions from the meaning of the song.

 “When I couldn't, you always saw the best in me

Right or wrong you were always on my side

But I'm scared of what life without you's like

And I saw the way she looked into your eyes

And I promise if you go, I will make sure she's alright

 So how do I say goodbye

To someone who's been with me for my whole damn life

You gave me my name and the colour of your eyes

I see your face when I look at mine

So how do I, how do I, how do I say goodbye?”

 Leah, Jacob, Amanda and David start to tear up a little while swaying to the song.

 “And there's no way you could ever let me down

Gonna steal some time and start again

You'll always be my closest friend

And someday we are gonna make it out

Just hold the light, just hold the light

 So how do I say goodbye

To someone who's been with me for my whole damn life

You gave me my name and the colour of your eyes

I see your face when I look at mine

So how do I, how do I, how do I say goodbye?

So how do I, how do I, how do I say goodbye?”

 After you finish singing the song you slowly place your guitar down on the floor behind your chair and reach up to wipe the tears from your eyes. You take a deep breath before looking up at Leah and smiling sadly which is when Leah gets up to hug you tightly. The hug from Leah makes you start to cry more and eventually all of Leah’s family join in the hug.

 “Welcome to the family.” David says as he pats your back in an attempt to comfort you.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The song is How Do I Say Goodbye by Dean Lewis. It is about his father that passed away which is the same thing that reader has.

This is by far the longest fic I’ve written in a long time. Hope you enjoy it!

Let me know if you want to be added to future taglists!

Taglist: 

@sofakingwoso​ @dutch-gay86

[zoeykallus]

Crosshair – My Beloved Enemy 23 – Sleepy Heads And Making Up

Crosshair x Female!Reader (FF)

Warning: 18 +

Smut/Oral Giving/Oral Recieving/Fingering/ Anal Play/ Handsy Crosshair In Shower/Fluff-Fun

_______

Author's Comment:

He can be so freaking stubborn, but he is damn good at making up for it :)

_______

What Happened Before:

Part 1 - Crash Landing

Part 2 - Hot And Cold

Part 3 - Hello Kitten

Part 4 - Look Who’s Back

Part 5 - Rebel Darling

Part 6 - Burning Anger

Part 7 - Love And Pain

Part 8 - A Difficult Reunion

Part 9 - The Bitter Taste Of Blood And Failure

Part 10 - Where The Dead Ships Dwell

Part 11 - A Lonely Firefly In Space

Part 12 - Broken Wings

Part 13 - A Helping Hand

Part 14 - The Justifier

Part 15 - The Bounty

Part 16 - Trapped

Part 17 - I Love You Too

Part 18 - When The Past Catches Up With Us

Part 19 - I’ve Never Been Good At Goodbyes

Part 20 - Unexpected

Part 21 - The Question

Part 22 - Sleepless Nights

Part 23 - Sleepy Heads And Making Up

You had spent the night snuggled together. Crosshair had been unusually affectionate, holding you in his arms all night and not letting go, as if he was afraid you might leave again if he let go of you. It did not bother you, on the contrary, you enjoyed the closeness, the warmth and affection.

The next morning, however, he was already up before you and about to get dressed when you opened your eyes.

"You're already awake," you mumbled tiredly.

He looked at you and said, "It's almost noon, sleepyhead."

You cursed softly and peeled yourself out of bed.

"Why didn't anyone wake us up?" you asked confused.

"Because there's nothing to do today for once," he returned, amused.

You sighed and threw yourself back on the mattress.

"Hey" he said jokingly reprimanding you "Get up, if we have a day off we should use it".

"Good idea" you grumbled "Come back to bed".

Crosshair showed a smug little smirk.

"Later. Now come on, I want to do something with you"

Questioningly you looked at him, lying in bed all fours stretched out from you "Oh yeah? What's that?"

"You'll see. Now get up, take a shower and get dressed before the day is over."

"You said it's noon, how can the day be over soon?" you grumbled, turning around.

Crosshair, however, had no patience for your sleepy nonsense today.

"It's your own fault, you could have stayed in bed with me last night and slept longer instead of going to Tech," he murmured, grabbing your ankles and pulling you by them to the edge of the bed.

You let out a startled little cry.

"Come on now, or do I have to drag you into the refresher myself?" he asked, cocked a brow at you critically as well as questioningly.

You couldn't help but grin at him when you saw his half-serious expression.

"Kitten, if you make me, I'll put you in the shower and turn on the cold water," he threatened.

You couldn't help but just grin broadly at him.

Rolling his eyes, he shook his head.

"Unbelievable"

Crosshair grabbed and threw you over his shoulder just like last night.

You cried out in startled laughter, fidgeting as he actually dragged you into the bathroom. He turned on the water in the shower and dropped you to your feet right in front of it, standing in front of you so that you couldn't get past him in the small bathroom and could theoretically only dodge to the back of the shower if you wanted to get away from him.

You hastily wrapped both arms tightly around him and pressed yourself against him, half naked as you were. Crosshair immediately felt warmth and movement come to his loins under the cod piece of his gear.

"Damn you, Kitten," he said softly.

The next moment you felt his lips on your neck, he gently sucked your pulse, slid his tongue over it and made you shiver.

"You don't play fair" you said softly "But honestly it doesn't bother me"

He chuckled "I never claimed to be fair".

With nimble fingers you loosened the cod piece from his armor and you began to palm his hard cock over the fabric of his blacks.

He moaned softly against your neck, "You don't play fair either".

"Does that bother you?" you asked, amused.

His hand went into your panties without warning, the touch causing your juices to begin to pool in your cleft.

"No," he murmured, "I'll just adapt."

You let out a soft moan that sounds like music to his ears.

"You sound so sweet when you get horny when I touch you," he growls to you, amused.

He grabbed your panties with both hands and pulled them down, then unclasped your bra and let it fall to the floor.

"Now go take a shower, I've already showered while you were asleep, sleepy head" he said with a smug smile.

"Not without you," you pouted.

Crosshair smirked and began to undress.

„Okay, If my lady wants me so much, how can I say no?“, he mocked you with a cheeky glint in his eyes.

"Do you want me to wash you?" he asked and you could see his eyes darken with desire.

You knew he loved to soap you up, especially your breasts and ass, he always took his time and pressed his hard cock against your naked body. Of course you liked that too, so why would you say no?

You nodded and said with a grin, "Yes, you always do it so nice and thorough".

A low, aroused growl came from his lips.

He slipped with you under the jet of water from the shower, kissed you intimately and wildly, playfully bit your lower lip. Crosshair let the water run over your bodies, soaking your hair and skin.

When he reached for the shower gel, your body was already tingling expectantly. Crosshair turned the shower head to the side so he could soap you up, so the water wouldn't wash everything away immediately. He spread a generous amount on his hands and rubbed them a little to warm it up.

His aroused growl and your pleasurable sigh merged as he started right in on your breasts, pressing the tender flesh between his long fingers and stroking your hardening nipples.

Crosshair lingered long on your breasts, pressing his hard length against your belly. But he took care of every part of your body, every bit of skin, his fingers sliding everywhere, shameless, greedy and thorough.

He kneaded your butt and thighs as he soaped them, took his time with your private parts, your folds, the mons veneris, teased your swollen pearl a little. The gel was specifically for the intimate area, you had paid attention when you bought it, when you realized how much he liked to play this game in the shower.

One of his hands slid down your back as he engaged you in a fiery kiss. The hand slid down your back, into the cleft between your buns.

"Better be thorough," he murmured against your lips with a naughty little undertone as his fingers slid over your backdoor.

You gasped as one of his fingers applied a little pressure to the firm ring of muscle, slippery with gel as it advanced a tiny bit.

"Crosshair!" came the startled sound from your lips.

He chuckled, then kissed you, pressing himself even closer to you and slowly withdrew his hand.

"Don't act like that didn't turn you on," he said cheekily as he pulled away from your lips.

Your cheeks glowed as you met his gaze. You hadn't expected it, but you had liked it.

Crosshair gave you a smug smirk, he knew you liked it. He took the shower head in his hand, rinsed the soap residue from your body and hung the shower head over you again, but turned the water pressure a little lower, so that only a gentle trickle of warm water rained down on you. He got down on his knees in front of you, looking up at you with an intensity in his eyes that made you shiver.

You knew what he was up to and your pussy was already throbbing expectantly. He took one of your legs over his shoulder to get better access and support you. Your hands reached left and right for the grips Crosshair had wisely placed.

You knew how absolutely divine he was with his tongue and everything inside you tingled and hummed in joyful anticipation. When he drove his mouth onto your pussy, you gasped. His tongue was fast, warm, powerful, you had no idea how he was doing what he was doing but it was incredibly intense.

"Fuuuck," came hoarsely from your lips.

He chuckled between your legs.

"Let's intensify this a little more," he murmured against your pearl.

The fingers of one hand, wandered down the inside of your thigh to your moist heat, playing gently teasingly at your entrance. The fingers of the other slid over your buttocks, to the cleft between your buns, and wandered to your back door.

His tongue played with your pearl as he slid two fingers into your pussy. When he pushed a finger into your butt again, your pussy immediately clenched around his fingers.

Crosshair chuckled at your clit and increased the pressure and pace of his play. His fingers in both holes, his tongue wildly engaged with your pearl, made your body quiver.

"Cross... hnnngh...", you tried to talk but couldn't.

"Close?", he mumbled at your clit.

"Yeaaahaaaanggh"

You could barely hold yourself up as the climax shot through your body, making your thighs quiver and vibrated through your pussy.

Crosshair played with you gently, helping you ride out your climax, and finally broke away from you with a big grin on his face, gently withdrawing his fingers from you.

" By the sound of it, I guess you liked it".

"Huh? Uhu, yeah..." you said giddy from the orgasm that still seemed to reverberate through your body.

He stood up and looked at you with a gentle smile that was rarely seen on him, basically only when he was alone with you.

After a few heartbeats of collecting yourself, you said, "I would like to do something like that for you. However, I don't have any experience with it".

Sure you had given a few teasing kisses here and there or licked once, but never really sucked. Just the idea made his hard cock twitch with excitement.

"I just don't know how far I can take him.... I mean, how deep I can take him in my mouth," you said uncertainly.

You slowly got down on your knees in front of him.

Crosshair smiled.

"That's not really that important. Look," he said, pointing his index finger and thumb at his cock from the tip about 2 inches down its length, "that's the most sensitive part only that's really important. For the rest you can use your hand"

Surprised you looked at him, in the movies you had secretly watched, it always looked very different.

As if he had read your thoughts he said: "In the dirty movies it's always exaggerated, sure it looks good, it doesn't feel bad, but it's not really important. Do what you feel comfortable with, the rest you do with your hand".

You nodded.

"You know you don't have to do that, don't you?" he said gently, even though he would be happy if you did.

You smiled.

"I want to learn, I want to be able to make you as crazy as you make me."

He chuckled: "Alright, have it your way".

When you kissed his tip, he moaned softly and put his hands left and right on the handles, as you did before, to prevent himself from reaching into your hair. He didn't want you to feel rushed and wanted you to try it out first.

Your tongue danced gently around his tip, moistening your lips before you let him dip slowly, into the moist heat of your mouth. Crosshair sighed excitedly as you began to suck on him, your tongue pressed flat against the underside of his hard length. You took him a little deeper in your mouth than he had shown you, testing a little how far you could go. But when you felt the first gag reflex, you didn't go any further, afraid you might make noises that might displease him.

The women in the movies often did that, but you always found it a little scary.

Crosshair's hands were closed so tightly around the handles that his knuckles stood out white.

"Good girl," he cooed contentedly as your hand worked the lower part of his shaft while your mouth began to bob up and down.

One sigh and moan after another began to pass his lips and inside you grinned in satisfaction.

"Kitten...." he said a little breathlessly "Where do you want me to cum after?"

You hummed with his cock in your mouth and looked up at him.

"In... In your mouth?" he asked.

You hummed again and winked at him.

He grinned.

"You're spoiling me today, mesh'la."

Bobbing faster, you sucked a little harder, eliciting a long, sputtering moan from him.

You tasted the salty precum and you felt his hot pulsing cock against your tongue, on your lips. Your pearl swelled and quite automatically, your free hand moved down your body, between your thighs.

He grinned with a low growl when he saw what you were doing. It turned him on immensely to see you working your pearl with your fingers as you sucked him.

"Such a needy kitten today," he mocked with a grin.

You hummed in agreement. When you looked up and saw how greedily he watched you, your juices ran down your pussy. You moaned around his cock, making him moan as well.

Your fingers were getting faster and faster, as was your mouth. Crosshair was already panting and you felt that it had to be any moment now. The thought made your pussy clench for nothing.

With a moan he said, "Kitten, seeing you play with yourself makes me want to impale you on my cock and give it to you good."

Heat rose in your cheeks and your pussy was already dripping.

He smiled as you slowed down.

"Do you want me to fuck you?"

You let him slowly out of your mouth and looked up at him expectantly. You nodded wordlessly.

"Then tell me, baby"

"Crosshair, I want you to fuck me," you spoke breathlessly.

He growled, grabbed your shoulders and pulled you to your feet.

To be continued ;p

@twinkofthedink

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[oro-e-diamanti]

The one with Victoria’s boobs

Description | Victoria needs help taping her boobs for an upcoming performance. You get more than you bargained for.

Content | fluff

Pairing | Victoria x gn!Reader

Word Count | 2420

Some situations in life simply could not be dealt with without a strong cup of coffee. Heading out to an exam, waking up to a text from that ex who still grinds your gears, missing your train, and being late for work ... You, however, thought you were doing fine today, mood high and excited for the day ahead. You had slept in and left the hotel at a reasonable time. You’d do what you loved - make-up - and then watch the band play a kickass show. No additional kick needed to pump you up or help you deal with the hours ahead. You changed your mind the second you opened the dressing room door and came face to face with Victoria's tits. Actually - scratch that - you would need a drink to deal with this.

"Y/n! Finally! I need you, come here." While Victoria's face brightened up considerably as her eyes met yours, a smile spreading on her gorgeous lips, you could feel your cheeks heating up. She didn't seem to notice or mind, instead grabbing your hand and dragging you further into the room. Your bag slid off your shoulder, unceremoniously hitting the ground and staying there, forgotten and in the way. "If Damiano keeps ripping off the tape one more time to readjust, he's going to take my nipple off."

"Hey!" He objected. "I'm just trying to improve your boobs, lady!"

"You can't improve perfection, Damiano."

The bickering gave you a moment to evaluate the scene before you. The dressing room was a mess, clothes everywhere and a stylist bustling around, trying to keep the damage to a minimum. Ethan was currently admiring his reflection in the mirror, hands running through his hair, while Thomas kept rummaging around the chaos. And right before your eyes, Victoria, in satin trousers but topless, with Damiano still trying to fix the cross he had put across her left nipple, as Vic kept slapping his hand away.

"Honestly, babe, I need you," she pleaded as your eyes managed to remove themselves from her bare chest and met hers instead. "I can't do it myself because when I try to do it in the mirror it looks weird when I put my arms down. And Damiano just about managed one cross that doesn't look wonky as hell after about 43 attempts."

"I did not need 43 attempts! I was just trying to -"

"Stop it!" Vic slapped his hand away once more, harshly enough for the sound to echo. "Go gel your hair or something, I've got Y/n now."

"I'm your make-up artist, not -" You didn't quite know how to finish your sentence. You weren't what? Victoria's personal boob inspector? Professional nipple-taper?

"Exactly, which means you've got an eye for aesthetic, so please put this tape on me."

You couldn't refuse Vic either way. Not when she was staring at you with those impossibly blue eyes, silently begging for your help. With a sigh, you grabbed the tape out of her hand, slowly unrolling a bit. You had only known her for a little while, but well enough to be aware that she wouldn't back down. Vic was already reaching for a pair of scissors, but you were quicker, tearing the piece of tape off with your teeth.

"Sexy, but scary," Victoria concluded. "But mainly sexy."

You didn't have the mental capacity to deal with what she had just said. Actually, you didn't have the capacity to deal with what you were about to do, but that was a pill you'd simply have to swallow. You hoped your shaky fingers weren't giving you away, as you crouched to eye-level with Vic's boob.

You had never much thought about the feminine beauty of a naked woman's chest before, but your current angle was making you question all your past convictions.

Maybe you were into girls after all.

Maybe you were just into Victoria. It was a thought that had been lingering in the back of your mind for a while now.

As your fingers lightly touched her skin, careful to get the placement just right, she flinched. You looked up, gazes meeting, and for a second there was something in her eyes you couldn't quite pinpoint, but it was gone before you had a chance to reflect on it. Instead, she giggled, "It's way too hot for your hands to be this cold."

Way too hot indeed.

You tried to make quick work of the task ahead and not to stare at her breasts too intently. Not to touch her soft skin too obviously. Not to let your beating heart get the better of you.

"I knew you'd get it perfectly!" Victoria exclaimed, turning towards the mirror and examining her now partly covered boobs. "You just got that kind of eye, Y/n. Thank you so much."

She had thrown her arms around you before you could react. It shouldn't have come as much of a surprise, Vic always being a rather touchy person by nature, but this time she was half-naked, her chest pressed against your shirt. Your arms carefully wrapped around her back, briefly letting yourself enjoy the feeling of silk-like skin under your fingertips, then quickly letting go and taking a step back. Your heart had gone from beating to straight-up racing. You were in so much trouble.

"I'll just put on the rest of my outfit and then you can do my make-up, yeah?" Her eyes shone at you in gradients you hadn't seen before. All you could do was nod dumbly, knowing that nothing was ever going to be the same again.

***

You hadn't meant to go out drinking with the band, you really really hadn't, yet here you were, sitting in a dark corner of some trendy bar in the middle of Berlin, trying to duck out of every video they filmed for Instagram and sipping on your drink. The mood was euphoric and everyone kept singing along to the songs playing in the background, but you kept to yourself. Your mind was still spinning with images of Victoria, memories of her skin on yours, and the fact that she was standing in front of you right now didn’t help. She was beauty personified.

“Y/n! Dance with me!” Victoria pulled you out of my thoughts as she pulled you up into a standing position.

“Vic, no one is dancing in this bar.”

“So?”

She had never been much impressed with what other people were doing. You quickly downed the rest of your drink, handing the glass to Damiano, who sent you a conspicuous wink. Whatever that was supposed to mean. You were still standing a little awkwardly when Victoria took your hand and twirled you around, a heavy slap to the bum hitting you while your back was towards her.

“Come on, Y/n, let loose!”

The shock of her actions only lasted a split second, before you broke out into giggles and let her pull you further into her. Her arms wrapped around your neck, trying to move you to a beat that was much too fast to be this close and entangled. You didn’t mind. Hell, you decided, you would never mind anything she did to you ever again. You didn’t even take notice of Damiano, Ethan, and Thomas dancing along around you, too focused on the way Vic was holding you and pressing you against herself. You couldn’t tell anymore if the elation you were feeling was because of the drink you’ve had or because she was looking at you the way she was. In the heat of the moment, you pushed a strand of her from her face, fingers lightly trailing along her cheek. Her mouth was on yours in an instant, pressing a bold kiss against your lips, but it was over before it started and suddenly her body wasn’t pushed up against yours anymore and you felt lost and cold. Victoria was now slinging her arms around Thomas’ neck instead, leaving a similar kiss on him, before giving Ethan and Damiano the same treatment.

Your heart couldn’t decide if it wanted to keep beating or start breaking.

***

The next days were pure torture. It didn’t help that Victoria had developed a newfound love for going bra-less - and an appreciation for you taping her up. Her behaviour wasn’t much better. You bent over to pick something up? Slap on the butt. She walked by you? No way she wasn’t going to brush past you in some way. Sitting on the couch? She was cuddled up to you in a heartbeat, face mushed into your neck, her breath softly tickling your skin.

Pure torture.

It all came crashing down the night Victoria decided to shake up the hotel room arrangement. She would usually room with Damiano, while you shared with other members of the team that worked behind the scenes. Until you were all gathered in the lobby of your hotel for the night and she loudly announced she was sick of listening to Damiano snore every night - “What the hell, I’ve never snored in my life?!” - and instead was going to sleep with you. Sleep with you. You didn’t miss the looks and snickers of the others as she phrased it exactly like that.

You didn’t have a choice, really. You simply weren’t the type of person to protest - and Vic knew. So you followed her up in the elevator, down the corridor, and into the room like a lovesick puppy, internally debating whether you were dreading this or looking forward to it. As soon as you had both dropped your luggage, she disappeared into the bathroom without another word. You didn’t miss the fact that she did not even attempt to close the door.

Two single beds. You breathed a sigh of relief. No awkward there-was-only-one-bed situation. Or maybe you felt a bit of disappointment. Maybe- No. This needed to stop. You were going crazy. You were supposed to do a job on this promo tour, be professional, maybe make friends with the band if you were lucky, but instead, you were falling deeper and deeper and it all ended with the fact that you had never felt this way about anyone else. It pained you to think that Victoria wasn’t feeling the same. And she definitely wasn’t - you were sure of that. She was a flirty person, she liked to touch and kiss those around her, but none of it went deeper than that. And you were going to have to accept it for what it was.

You were still in the middle of convincing yourself of not feeling anything more than friendship for Victoria when she emerged from the bathroom. Wearing nothing but a pair of panties. It was in that moment you knew you would never get over her.

“VIc, you need to stop doing this.”

Her face fell immediately, going from overly cheeky - which seemed to be her default expression these days - to genuinely concerned. Concerned, and confused. She was by your side in an instant, holding you by your upper arms, seemingly searching your face for answers.

“Do what?”

The direct question was filled with a softness that almost brought tears to your eyes. For a second you contemplated taking it back, changing the topic, and ignoring how emotionally draining the past days had been, but one look into her eyes told you that you needed to be honest with her. Now or never.

“You need to stop touching me. You need to stop riling me up at every opportunity, you need to stop teasing me and brushing up against me because-” The words seemed trapped in your throat. Victoria had moved away, immediately adhering to your request to stop touching you and you hated it. You wanted her hands back on you, you wanted all of her on you. One more deep breath. “Because I cannot stop thinking about kissing you. And I’m not talking about a little friendly peck. I’m talking about kissing the ever-loving shit out of you now and forever.”

It happened so fast. Victoria was on you before you had even finished your last words, lips pressed to yours in a heated and hurried manner, arms wrapping around you to press her body against yours. You reacted as if on autopilot, as if your body knew what to do simply because it had been waiting for it. Your hands tangled themselves in her hair as you responded eagerly to her kiss, before running them down her cheeks and to her neck.

This was nothing like the time she kissed you in the bar in Berlin. That time didn’t even come close to what was happening now. If your heart had been beating before, it was pounding out of your chest now. You thought that for as long as she promised to put her mouth on yours anytime you asked, you would be invincible.

The kiss ended rather slowly. A few pecks and staying close, breath fanning on each other’s faces, eyes still shut for a while until you two managed to separate. Victoria’s smirk was back, tenfold and you couldn’t help but giggle.

“Imagined anything like that?”

“You know I did,” you admitted, feeling slightly shy all of a sudden.

“Honestly, though,” Vic said, brushing your hair from your face in the most tender motion. “I’m sorry I put you in a weird position. I think my way of flirting just didn’t work on you.”

“Oh, it worked alright,” you laughed. “I just wasn’t sure you meant it that way. Especially when you kissed me that night and then proceeded to kiss everyone.”

“Yeah, that wasn’t clever. I think I was just scared because you didn’t react so I tried to play it off.”

Victoria pushed another kiss onto your lips, sweet and short and full of reassurance, then promptly hugging you with a force that sent both of you tumbling onto one of the beds. Laughing with all your heart, you pushed her off you but made sure she never strayed too far. You couldn’t help but be amused at the state you were both in, faces heated up and giggly, you fully clothed while Victoria was still lounging in nothing but a pair of black panties.

“For God’s sake, Victoria put some clothes on,” you mocked her, even though you both knew there was no reason for you to mind it anymore.

“You know, I think it’s quite fitting,” she contemplated instead. “It started and ended with my boobs out.”

[lubdubsworld]

Insatiable

Pairing : Jeon Jungkook x OC

Rating 18+

Genre : Vampire Au!!!! , DILF! Jungkook ! Bodyguard AU! Babysitter OC!   Age difference!!!

Chapter 1   Chapter 2  Chapter 3    Chapter 4  Chapter 5

WARNINGS : THERES JUST WAY TOO MUCH FILTH HERE !!!!!!!!

A huge thank you for the banner  to @helenazbmrskai​

Chapter 6

“You sure you don’t want to take that?” Yugyeom gave me a look as i rejected the call for the umpteenth time.

“Oh..uh... Yeah.” I shrugged it off feeling exhausted. 

The whole point of going out with Yugyeom was to take a break from one Jeon Jungkook but that was impossible..... with said vampire calling me every five minutes. 

“So...anyways.... Mingyu was way out of line and I really wanted to apologize on behalf of the idiot. Although your bodyguard seems to have put the fear of God into him....Kid was trembling when he came home last night. “ Yugyeom chuckled. 

I smiled weakly.

“Yeah...he tends to do that.” I said hoarsely. 

Jungkook was the one topic I was hoping to avoid. Because having sex with him hadn’t scratched the itch the way I had thought it would.... It had merely amped my lust by a few hundred thousand times and I was ill equipped to handle it. I didn’t know what to do with myself around him and I was so fucking terrified I was going to do something awful;.

Like jump him in front of everyone. 

So I’d spent the whole day trying to be aloof but it hadn’t worked very well. 

Jungkook stuck close me , tossing lingering glances that made my skin heat up, , hands brushing mine way too often, eyes trained on me without any restraint 

And don’t even get me started on the  touching.

Hand brushing my waist when we turned a corner , fingers brushing my hair off my face when I had my hands full with the kids, an arm wrapped around my shoulder when Minhyuk had asked me out again. 

And I’m not saying i didn’t love it because it felt like Christmas and my birthday had come together but.... but... I had a job to do. With  kids.

It wasn’t the place to be fantasizing about how good your bodyguard’s cock had felt inside you. 

“Jungkook right? Jeon Jungkook ....” Yugyeom said thoughtfully. 

“Uh ...yeah...”

“Tall dude? Black hair? Looks way too intimidating and dresses like he’s just stepped off a runway?” Yugyeom prompted and I blinked.

“You know him?” I asked surprised. 

Yugyeom shook his head.

“No, but I think he’s over by the bar and he’s looking at me like he wants to tear out my jugular.” He said casually. 

My gaze snapped to the bar behind us and I felt my eyes widen in disbelief. 

Jungkook stood leaning against the bar, eyes narrowed dangerously and I groaned. 

So much for avoiding him. 

“He looks pissed.” Yugyeom commented.

“I kinda ditched him.” I muttered.

“did you tell him , I’m a friend?”

“Don’t think it would have made much difference.  Gimme a minute?” I whispered, and Yugyeom laughed, waving me off. 

I stood up slowly , bracing myself for the interrogation I knew was coming,  before turning around and walking over to him. 

Jungkook’s eyes stayed trained on me as I made my way over and I felt my throat go dry at the sight of him. He hadn’t dressed for the place today, a black turtleneck and a black jacket and black slacks with a silver belt buckle. Hair tousled all over his forehead as he stared, unsmiling. 

“Is this whole angel of death thing really necessary?” I whispered as soon as I reached him.” I’m sorry. I just needed to ...” stay away from you for a bit and last night was so amazing and i can’t stop thinking about it. 

“ You couldn’t take a few minutes to tell me where you were going?” He asked casually and I swallowed. 

“Jungkook, Yugyeom’s ...a good friend.” I muttered.

“How about you let me make that call?” He said coldly, eyes narrowed in annoyance and I felt chilled.

“I’m sorry... To be honest, I missed you. I’ve gotten used to you being around and I was going to cut the night short. I promise.” 

He scoffed. 

‘Really? I don’t believe you. For someone who spent the better part of a month begging for my cock, the novelty seems to have worn off pretty fast for you.” He said casually. 

My head snapped up , the words stunning me into silence. 

I could only gape at him. 

He gave me another lazy once over.

“And it made me wonder.....did I not  fuck  her good enough?”  

Oh, Christ. 

I felt my face turn a flame red , my fingers going clammy. 

“Jungkook, stop.” I whispered , glancing back at Yugyeom quickly. He was fiddling with his phone, 

“What’s wrong? You need to head back? YOur boyfriend’s gonna be upset?” 

I frowned. 

“He’s not my boyfriend.” I muttered. 

Jungkook grinned. 

“Right...he’s just the clown you wanted to suck off when you were younger...” 

“God, what’s gotten into you?” I groaned. 

Jungkook shrugged.

“I don’t like being ignored. It’s a character flaw of mine.” 

I gaped at him.

“I am not ignoring you.... I... I was out with a friend....It’s been less than an hour since I saw you... I literally spent the whole day with you.” I said shrilly. 

“Really? Then why’d you not pick up when I called....?” He waved his phone and I flushed, looking away. 

“Because I wanted an hour with an old friend....Without anyone interrupting.” I lied.  

Because you’re driving me in sane and I need an hour without you around so I can get my friggin body under control before I get arrested for public indecency. 

He clenched his jaw. 

“I see. “ He reached for a glass of wine on the countertop in front of him and turned around. “ Here” He held it out for me.

I took the drink, suspicious. 

“Go on , then.... I won’t interrupt...” He shrugged. 

I nodded, relieved.

Turning around I made to move away.

“Thought you’d be interested in a little gift I got you.... but if you’d rather spend time with the clown... I get that.” 

His voice was low and deep, a drawl that made the hair on my skin stand on end. 

I turned back to him, eyes narrowed. 

“What gift?” I demanded. 

He shrugged. 

“Nevermind.”

I felt my hackles rise. 

“Jungkook...”

“Are you sure.. what if that clown misunderstands... ...” he pointed a finger at my table and I glared at him. 

“Stop calling him that , God..his name is yugyeom. “ I snapped.

Jungkook’s smile was positively feral.

“Don’t know .Don’t care. So, you want it? You sure ?” He asked casually. 

i nodded, holding my hand out.

“Gimme .” I said quickly. 

He shook his head. 

“Can’t give it to your here,  angel.” 

I frowned , drawing my hand back.  

“There’s a ladies room on the fifteenth floor. It’s being renovated ... no one goes there... Meet me there in five?” 

I stared at him.

“There’s a firework show in half an hour. I don’t wanna miss it.” I protested. 

Jungkook gave me a thoughtful smile.

“You wanna watch the fireworks?”

I nodded. “ Yugyeom booked it for me. I wanna see it.” 

“Alright.. I’ll get you back in time for the fireworks.” He nodded, face frustratingly neutral. 

“Okay..then .. and I’ll meet you there.” 

“Can’t wait ...” He murmured softly. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

The restroom on the fifteenth floor was deserted like he said and looked less like the ladies room and more like a luxurious parlor. The stalls were further in and the waiting space had beautifully upholstered couches and armchairs. Ornate mirrors hung on all the walls and I found Jungkook seated on one the couches, legs spread wide as he casually browsed his phone. 

I stepped in carefully , shutting the door behind me. 

Jungkook looked up at me, smiling. 

“Lock the door.” He said casually and I hesitated.

“Jungkook, we shouldn’t be-”

“If you need to be at the firework show , you need to stop wasting time baby...” He said firmly. 

I locked the door quickly, making sure it couldn’t be opened. 

I turned back around and jumped when I ran right into Jungkook, who had crept up on me. 

He smiled at me. 

“Hi.” He said gently. 

I felt myself melt . 

“Hi.” I laughed.

“Don’t like it when you ignore me.” He muttered. bending low and nipping my jaw. 

I grabbed his shoulders, knees weak. 

“Uh... is this the gift...?” I gasped when he bit down hard, teeth sharp on the skin and he licked the little abrasion, wet and warm. 

“Not really but I’ll get to it. Before that, “ He pulled away, “ I just realized I never got to eat you out yesterday.” 

The gears in my head stopped spinning. 

I could only stare at him, stunned/ 

“But, I like to be thorough and we don’t have that kind of time right now. So I’m just gonna ask you this.....Do  You regret last night?”

I blinked. 

What even...? I couldn’t keep track of his thought process. 

“No.. no of course not...” I said harshly.

“You wanna keep doing this?” He tilted his head, eyes boring into mine. 

 Only for the rest of my life. 

“Yes!!” I said angrily and he chuckled. 

“Okay...but angel, I don’t like it when you run around doing as you please without letting me know what you’re up to. What you did today...” He shook his head. “ That doesn’t work for me.”

I flushed.

“I said I’m sorry.” I muttered. 

“But are you?” He said thoughtfully. 

“what..What does that mean...?”

“Apologies don’t mean shit if you don’t back them up with actions. I’m just saying... you ready to back up your words by doing as I say?” his eyes flashed red. 

I hesitated. 

“What do you want me to do. ?”

“Just don’t ignore me.” He shrugged.

“Okay...” i agreed at once.

“ You can do that?” He asked with a frown.

“Uh...sure. “ 

He hummed. 

“I’m not so sure... I think you need a little help with that.” 

“Jungkook , what are you even -”

“Go lie down on the couch for me. “

I stared at him. 

“Hurry up baby, your boyfriend’s waiting upstairs remember? .”  He grinned. 

“Please stop calling him that...” I whined, moving to the wide couch in the corner and lying down after toeing off my shoes.

. Jungkook grabbed an armchair, dragging it close to the couch. He sat down , close enough to touch and I swallowed.  

Jungkook shrugged out of his jacket, tossing it on the arm of the couch , near my feet. 

He spread his legs and my eyes nearly popped out of my head when he began unbuckling his belt, dragging the leather out through the hoops before fiddling with the buttons on his fly. 

“I was thinking of last night. Was your first time right angel?” He asked casually and I stared as I watched his hands. Long nimble fingers gripping the zipper of his slacks and yanking the metal down , revealing black briefs. 

“Uh... I.. yes?” I felt my thighs clench in arousal, toes curling into the fabric of the couch.

 “  I’ve been around enough women to know that I’m bigger than average. “ He sank his fingers into his briefs, hands curling around the hardened length of his arousal and I flushed when he pulled his cock out, hard and thick. 

“Jungkook!” I whimpered, moving to scramble to my feet but he pressed a hand to my shoulder, pushing me back down.

“ Stay there angel.... Let me finish” He said sternly. 

I pouted, not entirely sure if I liked this Jungkook. Where was the sweet man who wanted to let me call the shots? 

 “ This is what I’m like. “ Jungkook said , grinning as though he could read my mind “ Just because I indulged you last night, doesn’t mean I’m gonna let you walk all over me ....Running off without telling me where you went? That’s not gonna happen again angel and I’m gonna make sure of it. ” He reached out and gently gripped my chin before squeezing down enough to make me wince. 

I glared at him before my eyes slipped back to his cock and my mouth watered. It looked so good, thick and hard and he was close enough for me to see the precum beading up at the slit. I wondered what it would taste like. How it would feel,

“Can I suck you off?” I asked softly, batting my lashes. 

He gave me an amused look.

“No. You can’t.  Anyways... Like I was saying , I know you said you were a virgin but then, you also took my fat cock like you’d been doing it all your life. “ He frowned. 

Blood rushed to my face in embarrassment. 

“That’s... you...” I spluttered. 

“And that’s when I realized... Just because you’re a virgin, doesn’t mean you haven’t fucked yourself. “ He grinned devilishly. 

I buried my face in my hands.

“Oh god...” I choked.

“Guess what I found in your room...” 

My eyes snapped up to him and he was rummaging in his jacket pocket. 

I shrieked when I saw a very familiar vibrator , a pale mauve in color. It wasn’t very long but it was really thick, only a hairsbreadth smaller than Jungkook. 

I glared at him.

“You went through my things!!” i yelled affronted. 

He rolled his eyes. 

“Hardly.  It was literally on your bed when I went looking for you in the evening because I couldn’t fucking find you.. “ He snapped. 

I shut my mouth. 

“Okay...fine ..yeah I use sex toys. Big  deal.” I muttered. 

He shook his head. 

“No it isn’t. Which is why I want you to show me. “ He leaned back, casually wrapping a hand around his cock. I stared at him as he casually began stroking the hard length of his dick, after licking his palms. 

Did he really think I was too shy to put on a show? 

Boy was he in for a surprise. 

Smiling evilly, I pulled my dress up quickly, hooking my thumbs into my panties and yanking them down quickly, kicking them off. 

I gave him a smile. 

“Can I turn around? You’ll have a better view.” I smirked. 

His eyebrows shot up.

“Go ahead, princess. Better impress me.” 

I rolled my eyes at that. 

Sitting up , I sat back down against the cushioned arm rest, keeping my eyes trained on his and I bent my knees and spread my legs, utterly shameless because well... because I had always liked the idea of being watched. 

Jungkook wasn’t shy by any standards and his gaze flitted right between my legs without any hesitation. 

“Pretty.” He murmured gently and I fought the rush of embarrassment. I’d started this and I was going to see through it. 

“What am I supposed to get turned on by?” I asked innocently running my fore and middle finger up andn down my slit gently. I was really fucking wet on the inside but he couldn’t know that.  

And just for good measure, I let my gaze drop to his cock and back up, looking bored. 

His eyes narrowed. 

“How about the way I filled your sloppy little cunt last night? Remember that?  Remember how fucking wet you got, just from me licking your nipples....?” He smiled. 

I felt my throat go dry and my pussy clenched,  damp wetness seeping out and coating my hand  and my fingers slipped right in  before I could do anything about it. 

Jungkook laughed, eyes trained where my fingers had disappeared. 

He kept his hands on his cock and leaned in closer, kissing the edge of my earlobe.

“Thought so. “ He whispered right into my ears, :” My horny little slut. Bet you walk around all day with that cunt dripping wet and ready. Bet I could fuck into you with ease, anytime I want...just flip that skirt up, push your panties aside and drive my cock into you, yeah? “ He licked a stripe up my cheeks and I shuddered,  pumping my fingers into my pussy faster, “  Virgin..???  what a fucking joke... You are the farthest thing from a virgin my sweet little whore...” 

“Jungkook...” I whimpered and he gripped my wrists, stilling my fingers and pulling them out. He pulled my hand closer, right up to his mouth and I groaned when he wrapped his lips around the wet and messy digits, licking up all the wetness there.

“Sweet and spicy , just like I thought...” He directed my fingers back down between my fingers...” Get more of that wetness for me baby...want you to jerk me off with that hot slick you have dripping between your thighs...” 

:” On your knees.” He prompted and I sank down in front of him. “Jerk me off, baby...Make me feel good...” He whispered, spreading his legs and I wrapped shaky hands around his cock. I swallowed , gazing at him , licking my lips as I stroked his dick, faster. He took one of my hands and directed them down to his balls.

“Like this... This makes me feel good..”He whispered, showing me just how he liked to be touched .I nodded, following his lead and speeding up my movements, gripping a little tighter, using my thumb to trace circles on the head, rubbing the wetness around his slit and the thick vein on the underside of his cock. 

He groaned and shuddered a little. And then he leaned forward, gripping my chin. 

“ I want you to get on my lap now.... and then I’m gonna cum inside you “

I whimpered, already scrambling to my feet but before I could get on him, he gripped my waists. 

“ Let me finish, angel.I’m gonna fill you up with my cum and then I’m gonna stick this , “ He held the vibrator up, “ inside you . If you can keep your slutty little pussy tight enough for me, keep this thing  and my cum inside you till tonight...maybe you’ll get your gift. “ 

I stared at him, my jaw coming unhinged. 

 What. 

WHAT.

He pulled me closer, maneuvering me onto his lap and I swallowed. 

“I’m not... I can’t..” I whispered.

“Sure you can.. I believe you. But if you don’t want to.” His gaze softened. “ We can forget all about it.” 

I bit my lips, staring into his gorgeous face and and really, it was a no brainer. I wasn’t going to say no to Jeon Jungkook. It was just not going to happen. 

I spread my thighs and he grabbed his cock, tracing the tip on my slit.

“Ready?” 

I nodded, sinking down on the hard length easily. My breath caught , fingers curling into his shoulders as I swallowed the whimper that threatened. God he was so fucking big inside me. So hard and real and good and I wanted to sit on his cock forever. Wanted to stay locked in a room with him forever,  just fucking and teasing and fucking again and only stopping to shower or eat. 

“Don’t cum.” He said gently.” You don’t get to cum till I tell you to. You understand baby?” 

I whimpered as he fucked into me just once or twice. Warm wetness flooded my insides and I clutched his shoulders, burying my face there as he groaned, fucking me full of his release. 

He grabbed the vibrator from the couch and I swallowed when he brought it down to my entrance.

“Ready baby? Gonna pull my cock out and put this in.....Need to you clench down on it and keep my cum in... Don’t make a mess alright?” He kissed my cheeks sweetly, the affectionate gesture a complete contrast to his filthy words. 

I did make a mess... 

A little bit and the vibrator was thick enough to stay lodged in, and I felt my eyes roll back in my head as he pushed it in fully. 

“You okay?” He whispered, kissing me softly before running his palms up and down my thighs. “Gonna help you put your panties on, baby. okay? keep your pussy clenched for me. ” 

I nodded weakly, trying to keep my muscles clamped around the hard length of the toy inside me as he helped slip my bikini briefs back up my thighs. 

“You okay?” 

I nodded.

“Good. Let’s go see those fireworks, shall we?” He grinned devilishly. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jungkook stood leaning against the wall of the rooftop restaurant , arms crossed as he watched her, a smile playing around his lips as he watched her squirm, shifting her weight from on thigh to the other as she tried to sit on the hard backed chair, her eyes glassy and unfocused as the Kim vampire talked to her. 

Dude didn’t seem to realize that she was so out of it she probably didn’t understand a word he was saying. 

He stayed in the shadows because the front of his thighs was stained with cum, a little bit of white streaks, stark against the black of his slacks. She had let a little of it spill out of her when he’d pulled out...which was a little sloppy of her and usually, Jungkook would punish something like that in a partner but...well because it was the first time he would just let it pass. Besides, he was sure she would improve with time.

He trained his eyes back to her hips and his lips quirked when gripped she armrest, shivering a bit. 

This felt better,  he thought.

Watching her with other men was easier when he knew that he was the one on her mind. Knew that all she could think about was keeping his cum inside her, the hardness of the toy a reminder that he was the one she was trying to please and impress.  

He slipped a hand inside his pocket, playing with the tiny little remote . 

Should he? 

Would it be too much? 

He smirked. 

Only one way to find out. 

He thumbed the small knob at the top of the remote, eyes trained on her .

The moment he flipped it on , at the smallest setting possible, she went completely still.

And he wondered how it felt, the electric vibrations of the toy against her insides...he wished he could see it...she her pussy spread out for him, pink and wet and swollen and wrecked.... God, the things he wanted to do to her. 

It annoyed him a bit, how shamelessly she’s spread her legs on that couch, let him see the pink of her cunt without an ounce of shame .....annoyed him because he wasn’t sure if it was for  him  or because it was what she was  like.... 

Annoyed him because if it wasn’t for just him.... would she do it for other too? 

He couldn’t stomach the idea of it. 

That pretty pink pussy, so wet and wanting...he wanted it all for himself . He wanted her legs spread out on his bed, her arms tied to the fucking bedposts so he could show her just how dangerous he could be when he wanted to....

That just because he’d let her take the lead didn’t mean he would settle for anything less than her complete submission.

Smiling, he turned the vibrations up a little bit, smirking as he watched her. 

Sera gripped the armrest gently, raising her hips off the chair a bit and turning around slowly to stare right at him.

He grinned wide, relishing the shocked desperation on her face. He pushed away from the wall, sauntering over to her slowly till he was right behind her. 

“Doing okay? baby?” He whispered gently for her ears only.

“Don’t do this to me.” She said softly, nails digging indents into her part as she clenched her fists , resting her hands on her knees.

He hummed. 

Poor baby, he thought fondly. . When this night was over he would shower her with kisses. Giver all the affection. Cuddle the fuck out of her, brush her hair back and make her feel so, so , good. 

But the night was  far  from over. 

He glanced at her companion.

Yugyeom gave him a smile and nod, went back to talking about art or something. 

Sera had her eyes fixed straight ahead, glassy and unfocused. 

He leaned over to whisper into her ear.

“Don’t forget...You cannot cum.” 

And then he sauntered back over to his place near the wall, before slipping his fingers into his jacket and turning up the tempo for her. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Was fun catching up, Sera... I’ll text you, yeah?” Yugyeom gave me a light hug and I stared at him, slightly teary eyes and about a second away from collapsing into a heap on the floor. 

I was sore and tired and a little out of my mind. The fireworks had lasted fifteen minutes.

It had felt like a year. 

And I hadn’t even watched them because I had kept my eyes screwed shut, concentrating only on not cumming, because if I did, not only would I literally drip all over the chair , but I would likely scream loud enough to wake the dead. 

Jungkook had turned the toy off when the show ended but it had done nothing for me...in fact it felt worse because the lack of stimulation was even worse than the steady thrum of the toy against my walls. 

Jungkook looked entirely unaffected as he watched me bid good bye to Yugyeom and it was only when he had driven away that he lightly took my arm.

“You okay baby?” He gave a me a slow smile and I glared at him through wet lashes.

“I won’t go anywhere without you again. I promise. Please just get this out of me.” 

He cooed, pulling me into a hug. 

“Alright angel. I believe you. Come on...” 

He led me to the large black Palisade , grabbing the keys from the valet.

“Get in the back seat.” He prompted. 

I nodded, too out of it to even question it. I climbed into the seats and sat down, whimpering when the toy moved inside me, shifting in deeper. My clothes were damp , almost soaking wet and my thighs trembled. 

He glanced at me.

“Can you hold on till we get home?” He asked  gently.

I stared at him, unseeing. Tears filled my eyes and spilled over.

“Please.” Was all I could get out. 

“Fuck, okay baby. Hang on.” 

Jungkook drove quickly, pulling out of the hotel premises and into the road. But instead of taking the left like he usually did, he took a U turn, picking a side road that led away from the city’s bustle . 

I gripped the seats as he drove in further away from the crowded city light , only blinking when he took a right into secluded side road, empty except for us.

I stared in confusion as he parked the car , turned off all the lights  in the car. I watched him climb out of the front seat, slamming his door shut before prying mine open. 

“Lay back for me baby. Up against the door.” He said gently. And then when I didn’t move he climbed, in all but lifting me up and settling me down till, I was leaning against the door, staring down at him.

He didn’t waste any time, spreading my legs, and pulling my panties off before pushing my knees up and apart. 

“Gonna eat you out.” He growled and my eyes flew open, the first pang of lucidity hitting me. 

“Wha-Wait...your...there’s...inside, there’s....” I couldn’t even say it. 

“My cum? Yeah... i know my cum’s inside there...” Jungkook laughed, fingers gripping the base of the vibrating and twisting it just a little bit. “ i know angel, and now I’m gonna lick my cum out of your sopping wet pussy..” 

Jungkook pulled the vibrator out of me and I sobbed at the gush of wetness that dripped out of me. But it didn’t spill, because he chased the wetness with his tongue, curling the hard length of it inside me, scooping up every last drop of the filthy mess inside me, taking it all into his hot, wet mouth . 

He hummed a little before pressing a thumb to my clit, rubbing the nub till I began quivering already way too overstimulated to experience anything but a throbbing pain disguised as pleasure. I stared at him , vision swimming as he crawled to his knees on  the back seat, head bowed because of the car’s ceiling and I watched him fumble with his belt, pulling out his cock and lining it up against my entrance. 

He drove straight in, without any hesitation, leaning over me till his face was just a little away from mine, staring down at me, cheeks a little puffed. He fucked into me with a force that shook the car on its wheels, the large vehicle somehow shaking like a leaf from how hard he thrust into me. I felt like my body was on fire, breath getting punched out of me with every thrust of his cock inside me and I could only whimper , fingers curling and uncurling on the seat as I rode the high of being fucked into incoherency. 

Jungkook grunted, hipped my waist hard used one hand to rub my clit harshly. 

And then he bought his other hand up to slip two fingers into my mouth, prompting me to open my mouth. The digits slipped in , rubbing the flat of my tongue before pulling out. 

I stared wordlessly, as his fingers slipped down to cup my jaw, squeezing till I opened my mouth wide. I stuck my tongue out instinctively and he groaned. 

Jungkook gave me cheeky little wink, eyes flashing red before he opened his mouth, spitting the wet mess of his cum and my juices right onto my tongue just as he pulled back and drove into me, his cock going so deep I saw actual fireworks. 

I went completely still, the sheer filthiness' of the act and the force of his thrust driving me straight over the edge , even as he groaned and kissed me full on the lips, tongue swooping in to swirl the mess on my tongue all over, his fingers gripping my hair as he fucked me harder, chasing his own pleasure now. 

My body hummed, exhausted, drained, completely wrung out and wrecked. 

I went limp as he gave one last thrust, spilling into me again. 

He was panting against my neck as he came down from his high and I raised a shaky hand to gently stroke the back of his head as he shuddered against me.

When he pulled back to stare at me, brushing my damp hair off my face he had a smile on his face. 

“Did you enjoy the fireworks baby?”  He whispered.

It took me two whole minutes to even remember what he was talking about.  

Author’s note : 

Jungkook sure knows how to get her attention back on him doesn’t he? 

@ladyartemesia        @veronawrites   @alpaca1612     @bonyg    @unseejuice21  @sppvjj     @ggukkieland     @tae-by-tae      @blr1004      @yoongichild    @stussyjeon  @jellybearo  @sumzysworld   @carolsummerlove

@bunniechoon

@preciouschimine    

[narrans]

The Orion’s Factotum | Ch. VIII | Bonding over Family

The snow was drifting outside so peacefully. It was early in the morning. I could see my breath even in my bed despite the fact I stocked the fire the night before and fixed the gaps in the window in my room. If my years had taught me anything, it was that getting dressed on cold mornings was miserable. Thankfully, I had laid my clothes under the blankets with me, so they were already warm with what little heat I currently possessed.

I wrestled myself into my clothes and kept the blanket draped over myself like the tents my daughter and I used to build until the last possible second when I needed to slip on my shoes and leave. I slipped on my cloak and braced myself for the frigid air which thrashed at my frame the moment I cracked open the door.

Just before I left, I remembered something I wanted to bring and briskly walked to the small box I hid under my bed. It was something I had made before leaving my daughter - a sketched portrait. It was expensive, but well worth it as I stared at the eyes of my daughter. I usually kept this memento with me, but I had taken it out when washing my dress. I placed it into my pocket before rushing back out into the freezing wind.

The walk to the Turret seemed shorter and shorter each day as I weaved through the streets. It was amazing the amount of change that happened. The walk that used to fill me with apprehension and fear was now fascinating. The barrels made me stronger, and talking with Steele made me smarter.

Steele, I discovered, was actually quite thoughtful when he spoke, and his learning curve reminded me of when my daughter was young and learning dozens of words in no time at all. He was intelligent, even beyond what Caster suspected. He was a quick study and had enormous amounts of patience, especially when I was trying to learn words and phrases from his language.

I nodded a curt good morning to the guards who were shivering in their armor as I hurried along inside the Turret and onto The Lock. I was grateful for the air in here. It was motionless and significantly warmer than the air outside. I stepped onto The Lock and pulled the lever. The gears creaked and groaned from the cold as they began lowering me into the darkness to the lower levels. I stopped at the first level and dragged the barrels for Steele onto the platform before pulling the lever again and reaching the final level.

I tugged the door open which protested in a whining shreek while wheeling the barrels into the pitch black room. The only light present was from the torch I placed on the bolt. The oil was running low, and we would need it if we were going to practice our words today. I had almost made it out of the room when I heard the chains rattle and shift.

“R...Raina?” The way he spoke my name was mesmerizing, like hearing a stormy sky speaking my name. I turned toward the darkness and could barely see the Orion’s violet eyes in the shadows.

“Good morning Steele,” I called out, biting my lip wishing I had greeted him in his language instead of my own. I would make up for it during our lesson.

“Goood morning, Raina,” he repeated. The heavy chains rattled again. Undoubtedly, he was sitting up. “You are leave? No… leav-ing?” I shook my head.

“No. I am not leaving. We need more light - fire and oil. I will be back. Ooon mnyim.” I smiled to myself, remembering the words for, “I will return.” I had to focus more than I thought on breaking down each and every word. Slurring words together and shortening them made things confusing while he was learning.

“Good,” he replied. Though I couldn’t see in the darkness, I imagined Steele smiling. I stepped out of the room, refilled the cauldrons with oil, and carefully set them ablaze. The light danced across the slick surface and traveled down the stairs and by the platform, finally illuminating Steele who was now sitting up and slightly propped against the wall. He smiled thoughtfully as I went down the stairs and walked along the platform toward him.

This was part of our pattern now.

I would go down the stairs and ask in his language, “How are you?” He would respond in my language with one of a few different words including tired, good, well, hungry, or sick. Admittedly, he was much better at speaking than I was and, more often than not, I would spend our time together teaching him my language since he was faster.

“How are you?” I asked. Steele contemplated his response before answering.

“I Sleep… slep-t? Slept? Well,” he said. I could feel the smile spread across my face before I could even think.

“Good,” I praised, again in his language.

“You? Slep-t good?” he asked. I nodded.

“Yes. I slept well,” I said. I unintentionally began speaking in my own language, purely out of habit, though Steele didn’t seem to mind. He absorbed each and every word, his violet eyes keenly trained on me. “Do you want to eat first? Or learn words?”

“Learn words, please,” replied Steele. The gentle smile that tugged at the sides of his lips made the crows feet at the edges of his eyes deepen. It was sweet.

“Okay, we will learn more words,” I replied in kind.

I started by going through the words he learned already. We talked about his arms and how they were healing. He said the guards were leaving him alone more, which was actually a good thing. Part of the time was usually just me talking about my home and answering questions about our world. Another part of our time was him trying to describe his home. Most of the time, however, was spent by me telling him stories and things about my past. It was mainly to help expand his word base, but his questions, when he asked them, were very insightful.

Despite all I had told him, I hadn’t told him about my daughter. I didn’t know why I hadn’t brought her up. Months ago, when I invested in the idea that Steele was indeed guilty of his crimes, I dared not reveal anything about the one person who was so precious to me. Now? The growing doubt in my mind ever since Steele saved my life from the fall had become a firmly held belief.

How could such a thoughtful person, even an Orion, be capable of such violence? There was no way it was possible.

I hadn’t dared myself to ask Steele about it though. That part of me, the shy and timid part that knew my place, held me back from asking him directly what happened that day.

I must’ve fallen silent for a time because I only noticed after several seconds that Steele’s finger was right in front of me tapping on the ground. My daze was broken and I looked back up into his soft violet eyes.

“Raina? Are you si-ick? All well?” asked Steele. There was something in his eyes that harbored concern and care. I smiled quickly, perhaps a little too quickly, and nodded.

“Yes. All well,” I replied. “Sorry, I was just thinking about something.” Steele’s brow knitted together, making the dirty smudge marks on his face line his features harshly. It was then that I noticed something in his eyes, like something was on the tip of his tongue.

“Raina? May I… ask question?” asked Steele.

“Of course. Yes,” I said, realizing I echoed the same tone when my daughter asked a question of me.

“Why you be Factotum? You… choose… chose?” asked Steele. The question itself caught me completely off guard. I honestly didn’t think he would be interested in my position.

“I did,” I replied. “A friend of mine, Caster, helped me get this position.”

“Yes, and why? You fear-ed me… Orion. Orion brings fear. You brave for coin? Coin means much here?” asked Steele. I was impressed that Steele was trying to put together pieces of our society, but his words struck something in me. I knew that what he said was true. Ultimately, I was brave for the coin, but it was more than that. I looked away from Steele for a moment, an action that didn’t go unnoticed by his keen eyes, and chuckled unsurely.

“That is one way to describe it. Yes, I was brave for coin, but it’s also to provide for my daughter,” I replied. Immediately, I could see a wave of surprise and intrigue on Steele’s face. It was most likely because I used new words he hadn’t heard before.

“Dah-ter?” he asked. “What is it?”

I wanted to tell Steele about my daughter for some time, but it didn’t seem relevant until now. I looked back to Steele, suddenly very aware I wasn’t sure how to describe the word “daughter” to him.

“Um… Yes. Daughter. Um… young… small… girl.” I tried accompanying the words with gestures, all of them unfortunately vague. I gestured to myself. “Young me, but not me. Her name is Terrilyn. Terrilyn is my daughter. I’m her mother.”

“Koothaloo naterma?” asked Steele. I searched my memory desperately trying to remember if he used these words before, but was unsuccessful.

“You, Raina, and small Raina?” asked Steele. “Terrilyn?” My mind, still racing, remembered the portrait I had grabbed just that morning of my daughter.  

“Yes, Terrilyn. She’s my daughter. Here, can you see this?” I reached into my side pocket and removed the portrait, the firelight catching the image of my daughter’s eyes, and held it up. Steele stiffened and eyes squinted as he attempted to see the image of my daughter. He had this thing, which I wasn’t sure he was aware of, where he would take in a small breath and hold it before crouching down near me. Perhaps he did know and was simply being considerate, not breathing on me. Either way, I was grateful.

His immense face lowered as he squinted at the portrait. I didn’t have issues seeing the details of his face when he was further away, but now that he was closer I could clearly see the lines of age on his face and how many flecks of hair were graced with grey by the sides of his ears. Though his eyes were focused on the frame in my hands, I could gaze into his eyes and see the faint lines within his eyes.

I had been so focused that I didn’t notice his hand crest over the ledge and rest near me. My focus, now on his hand, could see his injuries had healed nicely. I smiled to myself before looking back to him.

“May I?” asked Steele, keeping his voice just barely above a whisper. My heart thumped hard in my chest. I knew he would be careful. I knew it. Still, there was the slightest hesitance in my heart. I hadn’t seen my little girl in so long, and this picture was all I had of her until I could bring her here. My trust in the Orion won me over and I stepped forward toward his hand and laid the frame on his index finger.

Steele slowly adjusted his thumb up to balance the frame’s side as he brought the frame up out of my reach. He sat up and slightly pulled away while he examined the picture. There were several moments where he brought the image closer and then further away from his face, squinting and unsquinting his eyes as he did so.

It hadn’t occurred to me until now that he may have issues seeing things from time to time. Had he always had these issues? Or was it because of his age? I wondered how old Orion could actually become when I was snapped out of my thoughts when Steele’s hand reappeared in my vision.

“Thank you,” he said with that familiar smile that made the corners of his eyes wrinkle. “She… Koonyardo vi… see? Like you.”

I had to think about which words he used to translate it in my head.

“Look? She looks like me?” I asked as I took back the portrait and pointed to my own face. Steele nodded as he retracted his hand.

“Yes, looks like you… Sylstaryn,” said Steele.

My breath hitched in my throat. Sylstaryn? I had heard that word before. It was a word I had used a few times before to describe my home and where I was from. I used it to describe flowers and sunsets. Never had I used it to describe myself.

Sylstaryn. Beautiful. He was saying my daughter was beautiful - that I was beautiful.

I wasn’t sure why this touched me and why it made my heart ache and throb the way it did. I was speechless, choked up by a simple word. Perhaps he didn’t mean it like that. Perhaps he meant a different word. Knowing him, however, made me realize that there was no way he mistook his words this time. The sincerity in his eyes was enough to let me know he used the correct word. I could only bob my head in a surprisingly bashful nod.

“Yes, she is. I think so at least.” I looked up at him. “You think I’m beautiful? Muski sylstaryn?” Steele looked keenly at me and nodded after a moment.

“Yes,” he said with a firm, encouraging tone. I couldn’t help but smile and reach out to touch his hand with my own. If we had been in the sun, I was certain I would be blushing. I remembered being called this once before, but that felt like a long time ago. Instead, I just accepted his words and looked back into those violet eyes.

“Bromidian,” I said.

“Youl-heiris,” he responded in kind.

We stayed quiet for several minutes as I absorbed his words before disturbing the silence with a question I had of my own.

“Steele?” The Orion’s attention was immediately refocused onto me. “Do you have children? Um… naterma? To a girl? Like Terrilyn?” Steele’s expression turned from thoughtful to very amused.

“Naterma? No. You are naterma. Girl. Uh… Koonyardo vi… ma ther,” said Steele. At hearing this, I looked away, partially mortified at my error. At seeing my face, Steele began chuckling, which rapidly turned into a poor attempt to stifle his laugh. It echoed against the walls of the cave, sounding like a sourceless roll of thunder. Seeing him laugh, one of the first times where he was truly laughing, made my heart lighten to the point of his laughter becoming contagious until he caught his breath.

“I understand now,” I said finally. “Mother, naterma. So, what are you? Naterma and…” I gestured to myself as I said this new word, “naterma,” and gestured to him and awaited his response.

“I am naperna,” replied Steele.

“Naperna. So, you are a father,” I said. I watched Steele mouth the word several times before speaking.

“Fa ther?” asked Steele.

“Father. Yes,” I replied. “So, you are a father?”

The joy I saw in Steele’s face at my unfortunate word confusion subtly shifted. There was a fondness in his eyes, but something else too. For what felt like a few minutes, Steele didn’t respond as he seemed to reminisce on something that I couldn’t see. Finally, I said his name again to get his attention.

“Steele?” I called. Steele inhaled deeply and snapped from his daze and looked back to me. “Do you… have a daughter? A son?”

Something had shifted in my Orion friend. There was a silence I hadn’t received from him before. There was a specific silence when he was trying to find the right words to say. There was a silence when he didn’t understand. This was neither. It reminded me of Caster. It reminded me of a handful of times when I confronted my daughter. He was avoiding the question.

“I… I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to…”

“No…” interrupted Steele. A pit formed in my gut. Did something happen? “And yes…”

What? I didn’t understand. What was he talking about? Yes and no?

“I don’t understand,” I said aloud inn my own confusion. Steele, eyes still averted and looking worn and tired now, blinked a few times as he looked into the darkness in the chamber.

“Terrilyn is a daw ter?” he asked, to which I nodded. “I have… a son. Mithos. He… Koonyardo vi… no… I… bad. Ooon bravista. Koomarno kavishki, ooon sesil strumnakoth Ombre…”

Steele continued in his language, rambling on and on seemingly scrambling for the words to say while looking frustrated with himself. He looked torn. He looked disappointed.

Still…

Of all the things he said… one word truly stuck out in my mind.

Ombre.

The name of the western town that was destroyed – supposedly by Steele himself. I recalled Caster’s conversation with me.

{“Caster? What aren’t you telling me about Steele?”

“Well,” said the elderly apothecary, slowing to a stop. “I have nothing to confirm it, but I’ve had my suspicions for some time now. Other Factotum, before they left their post, expressed Steele’s relative… neutrality toward them and how he would watch them. All left because other positions opened, not because Steele ever made a violent gesture toward them despite popular belief.”

“What are you saying?”

“As I said, I do not have anything to confirm it, but I understand that people tend to adhere to patterns regardless of where they’re from. With that said, I am not entirely certain of Steele’s guilt,” stated Caster.

“You… don’t think… he did it?”

“I do not know my dear, and you would be good to keep these things in confidence with yourself. I, personally, find it odd that such a large entity who could easily pull those chains loose from the wall, crush us effortlessly without remorse, and who could undoubtedly escape chooses to do none of those things and, instead, saves a life of his captors and elects to stay. There may be more to our Orion than meets the eye.”}

Steele was talking about Ombre – and, moments before, his son.

The look in Steele’s eyes – the disappointment and torn look in his eyes.

I felt my jaw slacken as my ears started ringing. I staggered a few steps to the side. The light that once illuminated my eyes seemed to form into pinpoints.

“Raina?” I heard my name somewhere. It was so far away. It was bringing me back from my racing mind. “Viyoo-en rhonor? Raina? You… hear me?” I felt something brush my shoulder and, in an instant, I recognized Steele’s finger brushing against me. I looked to either side of me and suddenly realized the surface I was sitting on was Steele’s hand. He had stopped talking and had lifted me slightly off of the ground toward him, now holding the most concerned look in his eyes for me.

“I… yes. Viyoo-en rhonor. I’m alright. I can hear you,” I reassured him. Relief spread across his face as he smiled, his finger delicately coming to my side and brushing against it. I leaned into the touch.

Then I looked up his arm and back into his face.

It was almost with reluctance, but I had to know.

“Steele?” I began. Did I want to do this? Did I really want to do this?

“Yes?” he replied.

“Why are you here?” I couldn’t think of another way to begin. I didn’t think any harm would come to me, but that horrible curiosity I saw so often in my daughter didn’t come completely from her father.

I looked at Steele and continued as I saw a look of confusion cross his features.

“Ombre. I heard you say the name. That’s one of our towns to the west. Ombre. It was attacked – they say it was attacked by you. They say you hurt people. You did not attack, did you?” I asked, my voice naturally adopting a tone that indicated I knew what the answer would be. I watched Steele’s features shift from translating what I said to what he knew to defensive, to reserved.

“Steele? You didn’t attack our town, but someone did. Was… it your son? Did Mithos attack Ombre?” I held my breath, keenly aware of my pulse in my ears and fingertips as well as the rapid pulse I could feel from Steele’s hand just beneath me. “I… I’m not upset. I’m not mad. Steele, please, just tell me. Please… tell me my friend. Vandri… benyahoon ne amatchi.”

As I invoked Steele’s language, I watched the tips of his fingers twitch as he looked away. The same disguising behavior I had seen in Caster and those few times in my own daughter were now in Steele. One look and I knew.

I was right.

“Ptiedier… Ptiedier… I… Ooon bravista… I am… bad… bad father, bad son… my fault.” Steele, wordlessly, lowered me back to the ledge and began to tilt his hand.

No.

It was impulsive.

I still, to this day, do not know what possessed me to do it, but I still did it.

I threw myself further onto his palm, turned, and wrapped my arms around his middle finger. I felt the shiver go through his body just as I felt it go through mine. He dared not move, and I knew it. I always knew it about him. He was too kind – too gentle – to be guilty. He had to know that. I had to tell him that.

“Steele, you are not bad. Do you hear me? Not bravista! Not a bad naperna. He is not you, Steele. He is not you. It is not your fault. Vandri!” The broken words felt like they were breaking me. My heart ached in a way I didn’t think it could again. Everything began to set in.

Was that why he was here? Was he in here because of his son? Is that why he wasn’t leaving? There were so many questions that were hammering against my head. I was overwhelmed to the point where I felt my face becoming warm and wet.

“Raina…” Steele’s voice tight, constricted. I felt the tips of his fingers brush against my back and begin rubbing, as if to soothe me. I barely registered the chains clanking as Steele readjusted. I could partially see the ledge vanish as Steele brought his hands closer to his chest.

“Raina, vandri, doshti whyr,” he said over and over; a phrase I knew meant, “please, do not cry.” I managed to get a hold of myself after several minutes of my Orion reassuring me over and over.

No.

I couldn’t leave things like this.

Nothing was resolved. I relinquished my grip around his finger and turned to face him. His violet eyes connected instantly with mine.

“Steele,” I said firmly. “You listen to me and you listen well.” I could hear the maternal authority latching onto each word. Even Steele looked impressed, eyebrows furrowing and then raising as my voice rang out against the cavern walls.

“You are good. If you were bad, you would not have saved me. When I fell from the ledge, you saved me. If I fell now, you would catch me. A bad person would not save another,” I argued. “I would not be here if I didn’t believe you were good. Trust me. Trust me, Steele.”

~~~~~^*^*^*^~~~~~

I understood many of her words and didn’t understand others.

Trust me.

There were those words again.

How?

How could she trust me?

I told her I was a horrible father; that I failed my son and wasn’t able to stop him from hurting her people. I told her this is why I was here – atoning for my failures.

Still…

This woman…

She said I was good – that she saw good in me.

Trust me…

Truly… she was an amazing person.

I repeated the phrase, feeling ready to leave this horrid topic behind us; but, at the same time, wanting to invest in everything she said.  

Was she right? I wasn’t even sure. What I did know was that she hadn’t led me down the wrong path since we met. Did she see something I couldn’t see? Or was she seeing past my failures? I feared, deep in my heart, that she was seeing something that wasn’t there. The other part of me hoped she had enough strength to believe the same about herself. I could see in her eyes that she too harbored something deep in her heart as I did; but what was it?

~~~~~

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[dream-a-little-bigger-x]

Hero | Luke Patterson

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Song Fic February Week 4: Musicals 

Inspiration: StarStruck (DCOM)

Requested: Yes/No

A/N: Anon suggested doing something with the Starstruck soundtrack, so I’m writing a whole-ass series. This is based off the plot of Starstruck but the reader was a fan of JATP until she met Luke... Basically crush to enemies to lovers! Also a modern!au.

The third installment of the StarStruck series! 

StarStruck

Something About The Sunshine

Hero

What You Mean To Me

Pairing: Luke x Fem!reader

Song(s) used: Hero - Christopher Wilde (StarStruck ST)

Warnings: few swear words, mention of car accidents, mention of child abuse, mention of postnatal depression, tiny bit of angst

Words: 8.6K

I’m almost nervous to see him again. There’s a nervous flutter erupting from the pit of my stomach and I feel hot and sweaty when it’s not even that warm out. The boy didn’t have that effect on me just a day ago and now he suddenly does? I hate this. 

“Morning,” I greet when I find Luke standing outside the coffee shop with his hood pulled far over his head and sunglasses covering his beautiful eyes. He shoots me a smile, but I don’t think he actually looks at me. Right, the whole “I can’t be seen with you”-thing. 

“Want to go grab some coffee before we go?” I ask instead, pointing at the shop. 

Luke nods his head and follows me inside where we wait in line together. The silence that hangs over us is uncomfortable for the first time. I don’t know why but his mysterious, secretive antics are making me nervous. 

“Next!” the barista calls and the two of us step forward. The twenty-something woman shoots the both of us a polite smile, not even acknowledging that Luke’s keeping his head low. This is L.A., she’s probably used to it by now. “What can I get for ya?” 

“An iced vanilla latte for me, please,” I say and then glance down at Luke. 

He coughs. “Iced caramel macchiato.” His voice is low, just above a whisper, as though he’s telling the barista and me a secret. I’m glad we’re going to be out of the city soon, so Luke can go back to his regular self. Or to the singing-on-top-of-a-car-in-the-middle-of-nowhere self. 

“What’s your name, please?” 

“Y/N…” My eyes land on Luke for a split second, and I’m pretty sure he’s not even going to answer. Luke’s a pretty generic name, I’m sure people won’t even bother to look up. “Put my name on both, please.” 

The barista smiles and then dashes off after I paid to start making our coffees while we shuffle towards the end of the counter, ready to take our drinks when they’re ready. Luke keeps his head down. He doesn’t even look up at me and the awkward silence doesn’t eb away.  

“You’re not gonna talk to me yet, are you?” I ask him as I hand him one of the two straws I picked up. He shakes his head. I try my hardest not to groan and instead, hand him the keys to my car. “Here, get yourself settled in my car, I’ll handle this.” 

His eyes peer over the rim of his sunglasses, flickering with uncertainty and gratefulness at the same time. I shoot him a smile, urging him to get out of here, which he does with a quick flash of his teeth. 

The awkwardness quickly washes off me when he’s left the coffee shop and I’m all alone, hoping everything would change once we’re all alone, away from the prying eyes of Los Angeles’ residents. 

“Iced vanilla latte and iced caramel macchiato for y/n,” the barista calls and places the cups on the counter in front of me. 

I smile at her, say, “Thank you! Bye!” and then dart out of the coffee shop as fast as I could. I weave my way through hasty people and slacking tourists towards my Toyota Yaris where a hooded boy sits in my passenger seat. He still has his hood pulled up and his sunglasses balancing on the bridge of his nose. He almost looks sad, which makes me a little sad too. I wish I could do more than let him wait in my car. 

“Here you go,” I say and hand him his coffee when I’ve settled into my seat. 

“Thank you,” he mutters, and I’m pretty sure it’s not just for the beverage. 

A smile etches its way to my cheeks as I regard him. “You’re welcome,” I say and then start the engine. As I pull out of the parking lot, Luke finally sparks up a conversation. I’m almost relieved to hear his voice again for more than two words.    

“Where’re we going?” he asks. 

I debate telling him but then decide I’d do it anyway. I’ve been researching a lot last night and have found the greatest secluded spots and the time slots when they’re mostly deserted or have the least visitors. The one I wanted to take him to today was a lot closer than the other ones, so I figured we could start with that. 

“The Old L.A. Zoo. It’s less crowded before 9am, so I figured we could go explore it a bit until too many people arrive?” The statement comes out of my mouth as a question since I’m unsure whether or not he’d like that. 

“Cool,” he replies, and he sounds honest, too. “I don’t think I’ve ever been there.” 

It surprises me a little, but I go with it anyway. “Really? I’ve been there plenty of times! It’s really cool! Kinda spooky.” Luke lets out an airy laugh at that and it makes my heart flutter a little. 

Within ten minutes, we arrive at the old zoo. Ten minutes had gone by and yet it felt like a split second. The conversation ran fluently on our way there and Luke told me things about the band and his childhood that not even the biggest fangirl on earth could possibly know. I love talking to Luke about those seemingly uninteresting, small things. 

The rest of the morning, too, goes by as if there’s no concept of time whatsoever. The two of us walk through the old, abandoned zoo and explore every single old habitat. I even find a website that tells us the entire history of each section of the zoo and as I read it, Luke listens and adds in his own commentary. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed this much in just a few  hours. This guy is genuinely funny and I just adore talking to him. Our conversations go from the ridiculous to the serious, and every subject in between. 

It’s just the perfect day that I wish would never end, but inevitably, Luke has his own responsibilities and has to go by lunch time. 

“Hey, why don’t you come with me to the studio?” he asks with a smile as we’re making our way back to the car. “I’m in there all by myself, aside from our producer, and I’m recording a few songs.” 

I open and close my mouth a few times, letting incomprehensible sounds roll out. It makes me look like a dumbfounded fish, I’m sure, but I don’t care. My brain is dysfunctioning for a moment. Luke Patterson is asking me to come to the studio with him. To watch him record some songs. Songs that are going to be on the album. 

Luke’s laugh makes the gears in my brain fall back into place. “Is that a yes?” he asks. 

A heat rises up to my cheeks. “Yeah,” I finally manage. 

“Cool,” he says and then gets into the car. 

The ride to the studio is filled with smooth conversation. We never miss a beat, there’s never an awkward silence between the two of us. Only when we arrive at the recording studio and we’re met with a huddle of paparazzi outside the door.

“Fuck,” he mutters and ducks down. I do the same, knowing he doesn’t want me to be seen with him either. “Drive around back,” he orders before fumbling into the glove compartment of my car. He retrieves a pair of sunglasses I kept there, along with a shawl of my mother’s that I didn’t know was still in there. “Put this on.” 

“No,” I reply sternly, pushing his hand with the shawl away. I do take the sunglasses from his hand though, and push them onto my nose. “Put that shawl away,” I bark. The boy obeys and stuffs the piece of cursed fabric back where it came from. 

Mental note: throw that out. 

When we finally do get into the recording studio, as soon as I’m on Luke’s side, he grabs my hand and drags me into the building before anyone could ever spot us. I nearly stumble on my own feet, but quickly pick myself back up before I faceplant the floor. 

Luke huffs. “Phew, that was close.” 

He looks at me, and for a second, I think he might bring up the shawl again, but he doesn’t and instead turns to his producer, who had gotten up from his swivel chair the second we burst in.  

“Connor!” Luke greets excitedly and shakes the man’s hand. 

He looks near his thirties, strong built with flawless dark skin and a full head of afro hair. Combined with his extremely savvy outfit, I find him really cool-looking. He’s the kind of guy that would get all the girls in high school while still being a sweetheart. 

“You brought some new flesh, I see,” Connor says to me and outstretches his hand for me to shake. I do so with a wide smile on my face while pretending not to be completely nervous about being in a recording studio for the first time. 

“Y/N,” I introduce myself. 

“Welcome to our little slice of heaven on earth, y/n.” My eyes flick to Luke, who’s giving me that look again, so I quickly turn back to Connor. “Any knowledge of recording studios, y/n?” he asks. 

“Never been in one, but my friend is a producer and he did teach me some things.” 

I hear Luke huff beside me. “I didn’t know that.” 

“Well, there’s a lot you don’t know.” I shoot him a wink as Connor beckons me towards his deck. For a while, Connor guides me through his paces while Luke gives the best of himself on this song. 

After a few takes, Luke comes out of the booth and joins me and Connor to listen to what we’d recorded thus far. “What if –” I pause, debating my thoughts. “What if we go in with some soft backing vocals on here?” I click the part of the chorus we’d recorded and sing along with recorded Luke. 

“'Cause I I can be everything you need If you're the one for me Like gravity I'll be unstoppable I, yeah, I believe in destiny I may be an ordinary guy With heart and soul But if your the one for me Then I'll be your hero”

“I think if you put Julie on those backings, it could give that duet-vibe you guys are so good at.” I notice Connor and Luke glance at each other, soft smiles playing on both their lips. 

“Why don’t you show us?” Connor asks as Luke already grabs my hand. 

“What?! Me? No! Julie.” 

Luke chuckles and drags me into the booth with him. “Yeah, but we’re gonna need a demo, don’t we?” He delicately places a set of headphones on my head before placing one on his own. He signals to Connor and no later than 2 seconds, the instrumental version of the song blasts through the headphones. 

Gazing at me, Luke starts singing the first verse of the song, and I let him. It almost feels like he’s serenading me. Almost. All that’s missing is a guitar or a boombox over his head. 

“I'm no superman I can't take your hand And fly you anywhere you want to go Yeah I can't read your mind Like a billboard sign And tell you everything you want to hear But I'll be your hero”

From the chorus onwards, I jump in with backing vocals wherever I feel like it’s acceptable without taking my eyes off of Luke. 

“I I can be everything you need If you're the one for me Like gravity I'll be unstoppable I, yeah, I believe in destiny I may be an ordinary guy With heart and soul But if you're the one for me Then I'll be your hero”

“Could you be the one Could you be the one for me” “Oh I'll be your hero” “Could you be the one Could you be the one for me” “Yeah I'll be your hero”

“So incredible Some kind of miracle That's what it's meant to be I'll become a hero So I wait, wait, wait, wait for you”

We keep our eyes locked at the high note too, smiles plastered on our faces from ear to ear. Singing with Luke gives me some kinda rush. A feeling I can’t quite describe but it’s a feeling I want to feel more often. 

“Yeah, I'll be your hero Yeah”

“Cause I I can be everything you need If you're the one for me Like gravity I'll be unstoppable I, Yeah, I believe in destiny I may be an ordinary guy with and soul But if you're the one for me I'll be your hero”

“Yeah, I'll be your hero”

“Could you be the one Could you be the one for me”

“Yeah I'll be your hero”

The music fades out in our headphones, and soon, Connor’s applause sounds through it instead. I’m snapped back into reality, away from cloud 9, away from the pure bliss that’s singing with Luke and gazing into his eyes. 

“That was amazing! Good job, guys!” Connor says, beaming. 

Luke and I remove our headphones and he grabs my hand to lead me back to the decks where Connor welcomes us with open arms and a wide smile. 

“I thought you and Julie were the most watchable duetters, but I’ve been proven wrong.” 

I feel the heat rise to my cheeks before Luke snaps me out of it again. 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever, Con. Can you send the finished product to the band and our manager? I’m sure they’d like to hear this. Don’t tell them who’s on backing vocals, though. They don’t need to know that.”

I swallow a lump in my throat and try to convince myself it’s probably not that deep. Luke doesn’t want to be seen with me. Not even by his band mates. It’s fine. It’s totally fine. 

We wrap up the recording session and I drive Luke back to the coffee shop where he looks behind him and out of every single one of the windows, just to be sure the coast is clear of paparazzi. 

“Thanks for the day, y/n. I really enjoyed spending time with you again.” 

I force a smile. Ever since his statement to Connor about not wanting the band to know about me, I’ve been going over everything in my mind and it has caused me to fold in on myself.

“Yeah, it was fun.” 

He gazes at me for a moment, inspecting every inch of my face as if detecting the lie from my eyes. When I think he’s just going to bid his goodbyes and get out, he doesn’t. Instead, he turns his body to me and reaches for his phone. I watch as he unlocks it and taps away on it before turning the device towards me. There’s a new contact form open on his screen. 

“Gimme your number. I’d love to do this again some day.” 

I furrow my brow while taking the phone in my hands. “Do you even have time to spend days with a nobody like me?” I don’t dare look at him and keep my eyes on the screen as I type my name and number. 

He doesn’t say anything either until I finally cave and look up when giving his phone back. There’s a crease in his forehead as his eyebrows are knitted together in confusion. 

“You’re not a nobody, y/n. I’d gladly make time for you. I told you, I loved spending days away from reality. Especially with you.” Fangirl Me is jumping out of my skin while Present Me tries to keep her cool and ignore all of the butterflies that erupt in her stomach. 

“Cool,” Present Me says out loud while Fangirl Me is scolding her so hard. 

Cool? Cool?! Seriously? Dude.   

“I’ll text you, yeah?” 

I nod my head in response and watch as he gets out of my car. Before I can even place my foot on the gas or shift out of park, my phone beeps in the pocket of my sweater. For the first time in forever, I smile when seeing an unknown number on my screen. 

As I look out of my window, I find Luke looking at me with his hood pulled over his head again. He shoots me a quick smile and a wave before I turn to my phone again and type a reply. 

I whip my head up to see his reaction. His jaw drops before his face turns into a scowl as he glares at me. Giggling and satisfied with the reaction, I place my phone on the passenger’s seat where Luke was sitting before and then pull out of the parking spot. 

That night, I save Luke’s number to my phone. I go between “Luke P.”, “Patterson” and “Luke ❤️” but eventually decide on the funnier option and save him as “Poo Musician 💩”.   

I stand in line at the coffee shop before 8:30 that morning and I’m a little nervous. Last night when I returned from my day with Luke, the two of us had been texting back and forth. I felt like a sixteen year old again. One of those giggly teenagers that’s texting their crush. Which is what I was, but it’s been a while since I felt like it. 

Once I have an iced vanilla latte and an iced caramel macchiato, I head outside where I find a boy waiting by my car. He’s wearing a sleeveless shirt paired with a bright blue sleeveless sweater, his hood pulled far over his head so his face is hidden from prying eyes. 

I don’t need to see his face to know it’s Luke. I’d recognize those muscles from a mile away. The way he’s leaning against the hood of my car and the way he’s holding his phone is a dead giveaway too. 

“Your coffee, sir,” I say in a serious, deep voice. 

Luke’s head snaps up, eyes wide. He looks like a deer caught in headlights until he notices it’s just me and relaxes. A smile etches onto his face as he tucks his phone into the pocket of his jeans whilst taking the coffee I ordered for him with his other hand. 

He takes a cautious sip from the beverage. “Hm, Caramel Macchiato, someone’s been stalking me.” I know he’s just teasing, I can tell by the way one corner of his mouth curls up and his eyes have that childlike glint in them. 

Making my way to the driver’s side of my car, I smile and say, “Contrary to popular belief, Patterson, I’m not a stalker. I just remembered your order from yesterday.” 

Luke’s smile tells me something I’d rather not think about. It’s like he’s saying “You remembered my order” in that flirty way only he knows how to. I simply shrug before opening my door and getting in with Luke following my example. Without missing a beat, he fishes my phone from between my fingers and grabs my free hand to use my thumb to unlock my phone. This time, I don’t object and let him. I know that it’s just to get to my music app anyway. 

While Journey’s Anyway You Want It plays through the car’s speakers, I pull out of the parking spot in front of the coffee shop and start driving to the next location I’d found during my research the other night. 

“Where’re we going?” he asks, and I flashback to yesterday when he asked me the exact same question in that exact same way. 

I smile as I place my cup in the cupholder between the two of us. “You’ll see.” I glance over, finding him tilting his head slightly and giving me that ‘Really?’ look. “I promise it’s very secluded and not a lot of people will be there.” 

“Cool,” he says and sips. “Is this where you’re going to kidnap me and hold me for ransom? I bet you could get a lot of money for a Julie and The Phantoms band member.” 

I snort at his remark. “How much do you think I could get for you?” 

He scrunches up his nose in thought, which I catch as I take a quick glance at him again. As I face the road again, I reach for my coffee and take a quick sip, awaiting Luke’s response to my question. 

“Like 10k?” 

I nearly spit out my coffee. “10k?!” I screech, and his laugh thunders through my car. “Careful or I’ll actually kidnap you and hold you for ransom if I’m gonna earn that much.” 

The laughter dies down and after a few moments of silence lingering in the air, Luke says, “How much do you think I’m worth?” 

Without missing a beat, I respond to his question, dead serious. “Not even a dollar.”  

Luke gasps, his mouth dropping in absolute disbelief while I can’t help but cackle loudly. Judging from this conversation alone, I’m positive today will be a good day. A good, fun day. 

“I’m worth more than a dollar, right?” 

“No, you’re right, I’d probably ask like a million and then no one will pay the ransom and you’ll have to stay with me for the rest of your life.” 

I let out my best maniacal laughter as I feel him watch me. I know the exact look he’s giving me. The look. The one with the glistening eyes and the slightly turned up lips. The one all girls and gays swoon for. The one I would swoon for if I’d turn my head right now. But I don’t. For once in my life, I’m smart and keep my eyes on the road. 

“You like me,” he states proudly. 

“Slightly less strong dislike.” I’m lying through my teeth, but I’m hoping Luke won’t notice. Or at least not acknowledge it because I can already feel the heat rising to my cheeks. 

“I’ll take it.” 

He reaches forward and turns the volume up as Taylor Swift’s “Blank Space” floats through the speakers. Very loudly, and very obnoxiously, the boy begins to sing along. If it wasn’t for the velvet smooth voice, I would’ve scolded at him to keep it down. But the sound actually makes my toes curl and my stomach flutter. For a verse, I let him sing by himself while I enjoy his performance but by the chorus, I can’t withhold myself and sing along with him. 

The rest of the ride is filled with belting of the road trip tunes, laced with patches of small talk. It’s the perfect car ride, and before we know it, we’ve arrived at our destination. Santa Fe Dam Recreation Area. The parking lot is practically empty, aside from two cars, which I’m assuming are the staff’s. It’s the perfect indication that I picked the right spot to go to, and I can tell Luke knows it too. 

He’s bouncing in his seat, either from excitement or the amount of sugar that was in his iced coffee, and when I turn off the ignition and turn to him, he looks at me with the widest smile plastered on his face. He almost looks like an excited toddler on Christmas morning, ready to open his presents. 

“I came here once with my parents when I was younger,” he tells me, “I love this place.” 

His confession makes me smile. “Good because I’ve been scouring the internet for the perfect place.” He shoots me the look again. “Stop looking at me like that.” 

“Like what?” 

“Like you’re going to kiss me.” 

He shrugs, “Maybe I want to.” 

“So you want me to slap you?” 

His smile fades away immediately. “Let’s go,” he grumbles and quickly gets out. 

I heave in a deep breath, recollecting myself before getting out too and retrieving the backpack I brought, filled with stuff for today. Including my itinerary – or just a notebook filled with some ideas I had. 

“How about we start with a bike ride across the park?” I suggest, pointing at the bike rental shop I found on Google the other night. 

We walk into the rental place, expecting there to be bikes upon bikes but instead, we’re met with kayaks, pedal boats and go-karts. My eyebrows furrow, creasing my forehead as I look around the space. Why’s this called a bike rental when there are technically no bikes to rent? No actual bikes. 

“I thought we were going for a bike ride?” Luke says, teasingly. I look up at him, and I think my face tells him enough about my knowledge about this place. My research clearly wasn’t sufficient. 

Deciding to just roll with the circumstances, I roll my shoulders back and put a smile on my face. “Yeah, we’re going on a bike ride with one of these!” I say and point to the large, green go-kart. One of those that look like an old-school car at the front and have children’s seats in front of the terribly cushioned seats for adults. The ones with the small plastic wheel and bike pedals for two adults. I remember going on one of those big ones for six people with my family. 

“You’re serious?” Luke asks, his eyes wide. 

Instead of answering, I shoot him a smile before stepping forwards towards the staff member at the counter. The woman behind the counter looks no older than 45 and has long, billowing blonde locks that cascade down her shoulders. Her bright blue piercing eyes glisten as they land on the two of us, clearly glad she sees some customers so early in the day. 

“Good morning,” she greets with a smile, “We open in half an hour.” 

“Oh…” My research has been poor. 

Before I can possibly think of an answer, Luke steps forward and flashes the woman a smile. I’m not sure if he’s going to use his manly charms or if he’s going to pull the “Don’t you know who I am?” card. 

“Can’t you… make an exception for us?” he asks, leaning his elbow on the counter as he looks at the woman through his lashes. The woman looks up at Luke, her face like stone. She doesn’t recognize him and doesn’t fall for his charms either. 

Shaking my head, I spring into action. I quickly change the ring on my index finger to my ring finger and wrap my arm around Luke’s bicep while the other rests on his chest, making sure the ring is as visible as can be. As I flutter my eyelashes at the woman, I let the words tumble out of my mouth. 

“Please, ma’am? It’s our one year engagement anniversary and he was going to take me on this romantic bike ride….” I then lean forward over the counter. “He’s not very good at researching our dates, but he tries.” 

The woman’s eyebrows knit together as her eyes dart from me to Luke and back. 

“Aren’t you guys a little young to be engaged?” 

Luke jumps into the improvisation spot. “We’ve been told that a lot but we’ve been best friends for years and there’s no one I’d rather spend the rest of my life with.” He looks down at me and when I glance up, too, he kisses the tip of my nose, which I then scrunch. 

I ignore the flutters in my stomach and face the woman again. She seems to have softened, her eyes less icy than it was before. Then, she turns to her computer and clicks through a few browsers before facing us again. 

“What do you guys want? The Surrey?” She points to the green bike-thing at the front of the shop. I nod my head in response. “Okay. You’ve got it for two hours for the price of one hour.” 

A smile etches its way to my face. “That’s perfect, thank you.” 

 Luke pays the woman the rental fee and then she helps us get Surrey out of the garage. After bidding our goodbyes, Luke and I pedal off on the bike. 

“One year engagement, really?” Luke asks me when we’re far enough from the rental and I switch my rings back around. 

“Well, whatever you were doing didn’t work.” 

 He scoffs. “It was working.” 

We pedal down the winding road with the wind blowing through our hair. I love how warm the breeze is and how the birds are chirping in the trees around us. This is the perfect day to go out and do this. 

“What exactly were you planning to do?” I ask him, glancing up at him. He’s focusing on the road ahead of us, a comfortable smile resting on his lips while his eyes flick from one side to another, taking everything in. 

He glances down at me, the smile turning into a smirk. “I was going to charm her with my manly wiles.” 

“And how was that working for ya?” 

For a second, we lock eyes. Luke has an annoyed look on his face while I can’t help but have my lips curl up on one side into a smirk. When he whips his head forward again, I notice the slight tint of pink covering his cheeks. 

Did I just make Luke Patterson blush? 

“So,” he coughs. “Whatcha wanna do?”

I shrug. “We could play twenty questions? Get to know each other better.” 

He nods his head in response. “You wanna start?” 

“That’s your first question?” 

“That’s yours?” 

I press my lips together, shutting myself up for just a moment before recomposing myself. I’m not going to lie, I totally Googled some questions to ask in a game of 20 questions. So, I’m prepared. 

“If you had to be trapped on a deserted island with one of your friends, who would you pick and why?” Luke’s eyes widen at the question a little. 

“Woah, straight in! I thought you were gonna start with ‘favorite color’ or something.” He chuckles lightly, and so do I. “Uhm… Not Alex, he’d probably be super anxious and pace all the way across the island and make me nervous. Not Reggie either, he’d be singing country songs the entire time, though he is a great cuddler. Maybe Julie? Though she’s gonna be miserable without Flynn….” 

With every thought he says out loud, my smile grows bigger and bigger. 

“You?” My heart leaps in my chest at his answer. “Yeah, I like spending time with you and what better place to get away from real life than a deserted island, right?” 

Without missing a beat, the next words pour out of my mouth. “It’s cute how you think we’re friends now.” I surprise myself with the words I speak. We are friends, but I like winding him up into thinking we’re not. 

“Friends who wanna kiss each other.” 

Ignoring the heat rising to my cheeks, I reply, “You mean kill?” 

Luke shakes his head, an amused smile on his face. “When are you going to admit that you like me?” 

“Never – Next question.” 

“Uhm… What was the last thing you stole or shoplifted?” he asks and I’m glad he doesn’t push any further on the fact I basically admitted that I like him. 

“Oh! A magnet in a tourist shop in Lanzarote,” I reply, giggling a little at the memory. “I was there with a couple of friends during Spring Break and those magnets cost way too much for what they are and there was like a rack outside the shop. So, I shoplifted an overpriced Lanzarote magnet.” 

Luke throws his head back as he laughs, nearly steering us into the bushes. “That’s amazing,” he cackles.  

We cruise through the entire park for two entire hours, asking each other questions, and after returning the Surrey, we walk towards the lake where we settle down onto the blanket I brought for some food. I’d prepared an entire picnic basket for us to enjoy during our lunch. 

“I find it very cute that you made an entire picnic basket for our first date.” 

I smile. “I find it very cute that you think this is a date.” 

He gives me the look again, but I ignore it and get every piece of food out of my backpack, sprawling it out around us. Sandwiches, chopped up vegetables and fruits, muffins,... All the delicious foods you’d find in a picnic. 

“Tell me more about your childhood,” Luke then says as he takes a chicken sandwich and takes a bite. “You don’t talk about it much.” 

My heart drops into my stomach. I wish he wouldn’t ask about that. Talking about my childhood means talking about my mother and I’ve been trying to avoid that for the past years. Not that many of my friends even know about that. 

“I told you plenty.” 

“You talked about your teenage years, but never about your childhood.” 

I take a deep breath. He’s not going to shut up about this until I tell him. It’s not that I don’t trust him, it’s just that I don’t love talking about what happened with my mother. It’s something I’d much rather forget. 

“There’s a reason for that,” I reply pointedly and then shut myself up by taking a sip from the box of orange juice. I’d packed one for the both of us, but I’m the only one who’s opened it already as Luke had gone straight in with the sandwiches. 

Luke stares at me expectantly, waiting for me to continue. His eyes pierce through my soul and give me a sense of comfort. They lift a weight of my shoulders and chest that I hadn’t even noticed were there. His eyes feel like coming home. Comfortable. A place to relax. A place to be me, be myself. 

I heave in a deep breath and place my juice box on my nervously bouncing knee, holding it with my hand. It doesn’t stop the bouncing, so now my whole body is practically shaking along with the movement. 

“I–” I stop myself, reconsidering my words. “My childhood wasn’t the sunshine and roses it’s supposed to be.” I chuckle nervously and when I meet Luke’s eyes again, they’re looking at me with such intent that I almost launch forward and kiss him. But I don’t. 

“Mom was… difficult to live with…” I start cautiously,  not even daring to look at Luke as I speak and keep my eyes on the still lake in front of us. “She uhm… After I was born, she kinda went into postnatal depression. She didn’t take care of me, she barely even looked at me… At one point, it went so far that she got into an accident, on purpose, with me in the back. She did it a few times, even, to the point where dad just had to report it. She was admitted to the psych ward and that was that... I was ten at the time.” I swallow to hold back the tears that are pricking behind my eyes. 

Feeling a soft brush of the hand on my knee, I glance up, meeting Luke’s eyes. They give me that sense of comfort again, that sense of home, the reassurance that I’m okay. 

“We haven’t really seen her since. She’s out of our lives…” I sniffle and place my hand over Luke’s, giving it a thankful squeeze. “I don’t like talking about it.” 

Luke carefully laces his fingers through mine, his cold rings cooling my warm hand. “I’m sorry I brought it up.” I shrug dismissively. “But thank you for telling me.” 

“So, tell me,” I lift our entwined hands for a second as though pulling us back into reality. “How did Sunset Curve-slash-Julie and The Phantoms came to be?” 

Luke chuckles before engulfing our locked hands with his other and tumbling into the origin story of the bands he was in. He talks about meeting Reggie and Alex in primary school, and then meeting Bobby in middle school. He explains how they started the band in music class and then continued playing together until Bobby moved away from Los Angeles. The story then lapses into giggles and chuckles about all the things they tried to keep Sunset Curve alive, but terribly failed. 

“But then we met Julie in high school and – the rest is history.” 

We’re clearing up our mess before making our way back towards the car. I love hearing Luke talk, especially about the band. It makes his eyes light up and he gets all bouncy and enthusiastic. It’s the cutest side of Luke I ever did see in the past few days of hanging out with  him.

I take one last look at the lake where tiny dots of humans are floating along on the lake in their tiny boats. There are just a few, so nothing to worry about, but it does make me want to go kayaking too. Mostly because I don’t want the day to end. 

“Wanna go kayaking?” I ask Luke, pulling him to a halt by tugging at our still intertwined hands. His eyes dart from mine to the lake and back. I can tell he’s debating it, but then he nods and a smile appears on his face. 

With our hands intertwined, we go back to the rental place and ask the woman for a double kayak. We pay, put on the safety vests she’s given us and then proceed onto the water. As we pedal along, Luke tells me about all the adventures he’s been on with his friends and how he used to do this all the time before his schedule got so crazy. 

Every now and again, he stops and pretends to tip the kayak, making me squeal each and every time whilst he laughs his most maniacal laugh. 

The wall I’d built around my heart was slowly crumbling. Every laugh, every touch, every glance took away a small part of the brick wall. I’m falling in love with the boy I’d had a crush on and then strongly disliked for a good five-ish days. 

Getting distracted was not a good idea as I’m not prepared for what follows next. Luke pretends to tip it over again, but this time, he wobbles too hard and actually makes the boat topple overhead. I squeal, but quickly shut my mouth as I tumble into the water, making sure not too much of the lake’s contents gets into my body. 

“Patterson!” I scowl as I crash the surface again and find Luke laughing a few feet away. His brown, shaggy hair sticks to his head, dripping small drops of water onto his face. If I wasn’t so angry at him, I would definitely kiss him right here, right now. 

“I hate you!” I splash some water at him as the words roll off my lips. Luke’s laughter abruptly stops and he stares at me. His once glistening eyes dull down while his mouth falters into a frown. 

“You do?” 

My face softens as I watch him. He looks so beautiful with his hair all dishevelled and the reflection of the sun on the water mirroring onto his face. I want to kiss him. I want to kiss him so bad. 

I swim closer towards him and stroke his wet hair out of his face. My breath hitches in my throat at how close we are but I try to play it off by keeping my hands on his face and my eyes locked with his. I notice his eyes flicking down to my lips a few times, telling me he wants to kiss me as much as I want to kiss him. 

Should I? Full throttle? Or step on the brakes? 

I don’t even get the time to think about it as Luke presses his lips to mine. Now I don’t hesitate a single moment and immediately kiss him back. Sliding my hands into his wet locks and pressing my body as close as I can, I melt entirely into him. The same sense of bliss I have when singing with Luke washes over me and I find myself on cloud 9 again.  

We pull back after a moment to catch our breath. The glint in his eyes is back and his mouth, though a little swollen and red, curls up into a smile. He presses one more kiss to my nose before helping me towards the shore. We climb out of the water and bring the boat back to the rental place, along with our safety vests. 

Grabbing my backpack I had left with the woman for safekeeping, Luke and I bid our goodbyes and leave the rental, intertwining our hands again. The feeling his hand in mine gives me will never get old. 

As we get to the car again, I yawn, feeling a sense of exhaustion wash over me. Luke smiles upon noticing this and takes the keys from my hand. Wordlessly, he presses a kiss to my forehead and then leads me to the passenger side. He opens the door and lets me get in before shutting the door and jogging to the other side. 

The car is filled with a comfortable silence, just the crackling of a song playing on the radio filling out the quietness. I rest my head against the headrest and glance at Luke every now and again as he drives Sabrina. He has that one-hand feel on the steering wheel and the other rest comfortably in mine on the gearshift. 

“I had a lot of fun today,” I mumble, unable to speak any louder. 

A smile etches its way to Luke’s face. “Me too.” He takes a quick glance at me and then lifts our hands to plant a kiss on my knuckles. “Our band’s house is closer, you want to stop there and get us dry before you go home?” 

I hum softly, letting my eyes fall shut for a moment. Luke’s thumb grazing the back of my hand almost lulls me to sleep until he curses before the car comes to a halt. He pulls his hand away from mine and when I look up, the driveway and street in front of the enormous white-brick house is filled with dozens of cars. 

“Fuck, I forgot about the album wrap party,” he grumbles and then looks over at me. I’m shivering from the cold and exhaustion. “I can’t let you drive home like that.” 

I’m unsure if he’s talking to me or pondering out loud, but I shake my head instead. “It’s fine,” I say. “My house isn’t that far away… I think…” 

“No, y/n. I’m not letting you drive home exhausted and cold.” His voice is stern, yet laced with a bit of worry. “You’re gonna come in and I’m– I’m gonna bring you up to my room. You can dry off there and maybe take a nap or something. Yeah! Yeah, that’s it!” He sounds way too excited about something so banal. 

He hops out of the car and quickly jogs over to my side whilst I’m already opening the door. Before I could react, he tugs me towards the house. I can barely get my bearings or take the time to look where I’m going before I’m pulled into a room. 

“There are shirts and joggers in the dresser over there, pick out whichever you like and then take a nap or something. I’ll be back before you know it.” He kisses my cheek and then dashes towards the door. 

“You’re just gonna leave me here?” 

He lets go of the door handle and slowly turns towards me. His eyes are laced with regret as he takes in the sight in front of him. I must look ridiculous with my hair and clothes wet and bags under my eyes. 

“Please, y/n? I can’t have people know about us, okay? I just – can’t…” 

Turning on his heel, he opens the door and leaves me in his bedroom all alone. I take a minute to let the information process in my brain before turning around and taking in the room I’m in. 

The walls are painted white, except for the one wall behind his bed that’s a muted dark blue. His bed is king size and on either side is a nightstand. I inch closer to the one that’s actually filled with stuff, which I’m assuming is the one he uses most. Nightstand contents often tell a lot about a person. His contains the band’s autobiography, “Bruce Springsteen: All The Songs” and “Beach Read” by Emily Henry, the book I started the other week and shared on Instagram Stories. 

Would he have seen that and decided to read it too? 

Shaking the ridiculous thought out of my head, I move over to his dresser and take out a pair of joggers and his Rush muscle tank I’ve seen him in many a time during gigs. I peel my drenched clothes off my body and get into Luke’s freshly washed ones. They smell of his laundry products. It’s a fresh and calming scent.

For a while, I look around his room. The books on the shelves and the pictures on the walls, most of which of the band and some of him and Carrie Wilson. There had been a rumor about him dating the Instagram Influencer, but I’d never believed it until I saw her face pop up in some of the framed photos in his room. 

I decide to go and venture about the house since all the commotion seems to be outside in the garden. I weave through hallway upon hallway, finding more photos and more things that belong to the band. The living room walls are adorned with platinum records and other awards they’d won over the two years they’d been active in the music industry. I can’t help but feel a sense of pride rush over me. That’s my favorite band right there. That’s the boy I’ve fallen in love with. 

“Excuse me – Who are you?” 

The voice makes me jump out of my skin. I thought everyone was outside. When I look up, I find the perfectly flawless face of Carrie Wilson. Her long, blonde hair cascades into curls down her shoulders and back while her round, brown eyes stare at me with intent and curiosity. 

“Oh, sorry. I’m y/n. I–” I stop myself, remembering Luke didn’t want anyone to know about us. That includes his girlfriend – or ex-girlfriend. 

Carrie’s mouth curls up into an amused, curious smile, catching onto what’s happening. “You’re Luke’s new adventure, aren’t you?” I huff out the breath I was holding. It’s a telling huff, I’m sure. “You are…” She trails off and inspects me for a second before continuing. “Just so you know, it’s not going to work. Luke’s too infatuated with this lifestyle of his. He loves his job, he loves his stardom. He loves it too much to ever focus on a partner. Believe me, we tried.” 

I exhale at the use of her past tense, but then all the other information downs on me. Luke’s life is so much different from mine. While I work several jobs to pay for college and still live with my dad, he lives by himself and tours the world. He’s too busy to start anything serious with me. Whatever happened in the last few days was just temporary. 

“You seem sweet, y/n, so I’m going to be frank. Get out before it’s too late. You’re only gonna get hurt if you’re gonna stay.” As she passes me, she places a reassuring hand on my shoulder.  

If my brain wasn’t going a mile a second about everything she’s telling me, I would be caught off guard by how sweet Carrie Wilson is. She’s always portrayed as this complete ego-centric bitch who used people to her advantage. 

The exhaustion taking over, I shuffle back upstairs and sit down on Luke’s bed but when I hear the commotion outside die down and guitar strums float through the air into the house, I grow curious. I get up from the bed and make a beeline towards the ceiling-to-floor glass doors that give out onto a balcony. I carefully open the door and step out, the summer breeze tickling my skin while Luke’s voice reaches my ears. 

The balcony looks out onto the garden, it’s just out of sight from where everyone’s huddled up around the band. I lean my elbows on the bannister and watch on as Luke’s voice floated through the air. 

“I'm no superman I can take your hand And fly you anywhere you wanna go, yeah I can read your mind Like a billboard sign And tell you everything you wanna hear, but I'll be your hero”

I smile at the memory of us in the studio yesterday. The last few days have been perfect. Just… Perfect. And now this girl has to come and ruin it by pulling me back into reality. 

“Cause I, I can be everything you need If you're the one for me, like gravity, I'll be unstoppable I, yeah I believe in destiny I may be an ordinary guy without his soul But if you're the one for me Then I'll be a hero Oh, I'll be a hero, yeah I'll be a hero”

It’s not that Carrie isn’t right. She is. Luke is way too busy with the band and his fame and everything around it. He doesn’t have time or room between those things for me. Not for an ordinary girl. Not for anyone. 

“So incredible Some kinda miracle That when it's meant to be, I'll become a hero, oh So I'll wait, wait, wait, wait for you”

Luke’s eyes meet mine as he hits that high note and his mouth curls up into that beautiful smile I’ve come to love. Once again, I’ve fallen in love with someone who would never reciprocate those feelings. If I don’t get out now, I’m going to get hurt. 

“Yeah I'll be a hero Cause I, I can be everything you need If you're the one for me, like gravity, I'll be unstoppable I, yeah I believe in destiny I may be an ordinary guy without his soul But if you're the one for me I'll be a hero Yeah, yeah I'll be a hero, yeah I'll be a hero Hero”

As the last notes of his song ring out into the night, I grab my still wet clothes and my keys Luke left on the dresser, and then leave the house. My heart breaks with every step I take, but I know it’s what’s best for me. It’s what’s best for both of us. There’s no room for me in his life. Like he said, he’s no superman, he can’t handle this many things at once. Not even a hero would be able to.  

Everything taglist:

@wanniiieeee @phantompogues 

JATP taglist:

@hannahhistorian92 @marinettepotterandplagg @thequirkybookaholic @bookdealer5 @tenaciousperfectionunknown @hemmingsness @iainttakingshitfromnobody @ifilwtmfc @angryknightstatesmantrash @kiss-themoongoodbye @charliesmountains @thedarkqueenofavalon @calamitykaty @caitsymichelle13 @wiselight @kcd15 @vicesvsvirtuesfanfic @stars-soph @kinda-really-lost @notasofti @stellasmusa @n0wornever @kaitieskidmore1 @tefilovesreading @pxperphxntom @crybabyddl @crybabyddl @headheartbellarke @authentic-gillespie @happinessinthedarkesttimes @bright-molina @rangerelik @cordeliascrown @willex-owns-my-heart @fangirlangioma @frickin-bats @flower-name @jaskiers-sweetkiss @jandthephantoms @kelpwithawhy  @the-hufflepuff-hunter @lookingthroughmirrors @buckybarnesishot310 @echocharm17618 @littlemissaddict @mystic-writings @joynerxmercer @brooke0297 @magicalxdaydream @musicianspiritsblog @bexxy @ruvaitkevicius @whitetigerlover17 @stressyanddepressysimp  @talk-on-the-street @theolivekiddo @sunsetcurvej @teti-menchon0604 @candycornmgg @gray_jato

Charlie/Luke taglist: 

@lukeys-giggle​ @gingerxarmy​ @lovesanimals​ @lolychu​ @perfectlywrongformend3s​ @luckylouiebug @camiladelrio98​ @myfriendscallmebeans​ @rachmmb​ @whitemanshoe19​ @killerqueenfan​ 

TAGLIST |  MASTERLIST 

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Of something beautiful, but annihilating🚬3

Warnings: nonconsensual sex, violence and abuse, mentions of miscarriage, mentions of death'; violence, attempted rape.

This is dark!fic and explicit. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Reader’s husband brings home an unexpected houseguest.

Note: So this is for black Friday and then I’ll be working all today and tomorrow and schedule’s are super late so I dunno when Im working after that. Hope you guys enjoy and don’t hesitate to drop by my asks.

Thank you. Love you guys!

As always, if you can, please leave some feedback, like and reblog <3

Arvin let you pick the record. You found it among the box of your daddy’s music. It was one of your favourites and you were glad he wasn’t bothered by Patsy Cline’s droll tones. He seemed to enjoy it as he sat and read a magazine and you searched for a button from your large tin to match that missing from Roy’s jacket.

“You ever listen to Elvis?” He looked up from behind the pages.

“I… I heard him on the radio but you know we haven’t got new records since Daddy died,” you said as you continued your hunt. “And Roy don’t like all that new music. He says it’s no good.”

“Well, he doesn’t seem to like much, does he?” Arvin sniffed, “I always knew he was a grouch but I just thought it was the job.”

“He’s not… He’s just stressed. He works so much.” You looked down and settled on a button that was close enough. 

“You do too,” Arvin hid behind the magazine again. “You should be the one goin’ out and doin’ what you like on a Saturday. Hell, if he ain’t gonna spend his time with you, you should do something of your own.”

“I like sewing,” you shrugged as you threaded the button, “You know, it’s not so bad. I get time to myself. A lot of people can’t say that.”

“Sounds pretty lonely to me,” he flicked the page.

You were silent. You didn’t know how to respond. He was skirting around what he really wanted to say, what you didn’t want him to talk about. The tension in the air thickened as you feared he would admit that he knew or you might confess that your husband wasn’t much of one. Hell, you’d yet to accept that yourself.

Your fears were assuaged by the sudden clatter on the porch and the hinges of the door as it was swung open. You sat up and set aside Roy’s jacket. You stood as he staggered inside. He always did like to drink when he fished, or did much of anything else. You frowned as he tracked mud in on his tall rubber boots.

“Roy, you’re making a mess,” you said as you went to the doorway and watched him stumble around the entryway.

“Keep ya busy,” he slapped a hand on the wall and wiggled his leg free of a boot. “There’s a whole pail of fish out front too.”

“Mmm,” you hummed as his cheeks glowed. You doubted he’d be awake that long. “Well, I’ll just fry those up while you sit down.”

“Agh,” he tripped over his other boot as he slipped it off and Arvin brushed by you to catch him.

“Hey, Roy,” he took his arm, “How was the fishing? Why don’t you sit down? We’ll have a beer.”

“I almost forgot about you, boy,” he shook free of Arvin and ambled closer to you, “Maybe you can hide away after dinner for a while?”

He dragged his hand up your thigh and slapped your ass as he passed you. Arvin turned as Roy clumsily traipsed into the living room and fell onto the couch. He looked at you but you couldn’t stand to meet his.

“Sure,” Arvin uttered, “I’ll just go get those fish first.”

He disappeared through the front door and you crossed your arms as you turned to watch your husband. His head lolled as he chuckled.

“You think he ever fucked a girl?” He asked, “Boy tiptoes around like a virgin.”

“That’s crass, Roy,” you reproached.

“Don’t act so innocent,” he snapped, “If you didn’t, maybe I’d… well.”

His words trailed off and he closed his eyes. He yawned and sighed loudly. You grimaced and listened to the door as it hit the frame again. Arvin continued onto the kitchen as Roy began to snore. It must have been a record how quickly he’d passed out this time.

You went through to the kitchen as Arvin drained the water from the pail of fish. You went to the drawer and got a knife. You rest it on its end as you gripped it and looked out the window.

“He’s already out for the night,” you said, “You hungry?”

“I said I’d make the fish, I meant it.”

“Nah, I’ll flay them and put ‘em in the fridge,” you swallowed, “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“That you’re stuck here with us. Sorry he’s always drunk.” You looked down at the blade. You didn’t say what you really wanted to. Sorry you were stupid enough to choose Roy.

“That isn’t your fault and you know, I don’t mind it so much.” He neared, “We’re friends now, aren’t we? That’s worth it.”

You nodded but couldn’t smile. He always tried to make things seem nicer than they were. He was much better at it than you were.

“You comin’ to church tomorrow?”

“Of course,” he answered like it was obvious.

You turned away and laid out the fish across the cutting board. He stayed behind you, the record silenced and began to skip.

“I think I got somethin’ nice I can find.” He left you and the crackle of the Victrola died.

You slice the fish, careful not to cut your fingers as you deboned it and tossed away the heads and tails. You heard Arvin speak in a low voice and a grumble. Then heavy footsteps interspersed with lighter ones. The stairs groaned and you kept on, wrapping the filets in paper and tucking it away.

You cleaned up and washed the smell off your hands. The living room was empty so you climbed the stairs and found Roy face down on your bed. You turned to the open attic and Arvin descended the ladder.

“You got him to bed?” You tilted your head.

“Wasn’t so hard. Poked him a few times.” He grinned. “So what time do I needa be ready for church?”

“We leave about twenty minutes before service. It’s at eight.” You answered, “Oh, you know what--” You raised your index finger, “One sec.”

You spun and scurried into your father’s room. It was just as it had been before he died except now there were boxes stacked along one wall. You pushed open the closet and fluttered through the clothes hanging within. You pulled out the old grey suit and white shirt that had yet to yellow. You grabbed a tie from the drawer as you passed the dresser.

You smelled them as you went back to the door as Arvin peeked in.

“For church,” you held them out, “My daddy was a bit taller but he got skinny near the end. I can pin up the pants for you and you’ll look just fine.”

“Oh,” he face paled, “You-- I can’t--”

“Roy’ll never fit into these so please,” you pushed them against his chest. “And I don’t think he’ll be up in time for church so I need you to drive.”

He smiled and took the clothes. He hugged them as if they were precious. “Thank you. I’m gonna sound like you for a moment but you really didn’t have to.”

“You think I’m gonna forget that you promised to make the fish? It’ll be a nice Sunday night dinner.” You inhaled deeply, “I think that for tonight, I’m gonna lay down though.”

“Alright,” he let you past, “You have a good night.”

“You too,” you neared your bedroom door as Roy’s snores grew louder, “Might have to stuff my ears with cotton.”

🚬

As you expected, Roy was too hungover to get up for church. You didn’t really go for the sermons but your daddy made it a habit when you were young to make sure you got to see the other kids in town. Sunday school had socialised you in the circles of the small town but they had proven less than welcoming. And since you’d grown out of your education, you went to trade recipes with some of the other wives.

Arvin was awake before you. As you pulled a cardigan over your blue dress you stopped at the bottom of the stairs and he appeared from the front room.

“Oh, Arvin,” you smiled, “That suit looks real nice on you. And the pants…”

“I sewed them myself last night,” he lifted his foot, “Remembered a few stitches.” He straightened the jacket, “You look real good too.”

“Well, aren’t we a pair?” You chimed. “Gonna have to be since Roy hasn’t moved since you dragged him to bed.”

“After you,” he waved to the door, “Think we should get goin’. My daddy woulda whipped me being late for the lord’s prayer.

You led him out the door and climbed into the truck opposite him. He turned the ignition and the engine rumbled to life. You felt calm as you smelled the early morning dew and you looked out the window as he shifted into gear. The lush green grass passed you by and trees swayed as he steered along the old country road.

As always, the church was crowded. You and Arvin squeezed in at the back. He was quiet and sombre as you entered. As you sat, you looked over at him. His jaw squared as the preacher came out and began his weekly scourge. A fire burned behind Arvin’s brown irises and he scowled for a moment before his face went placid.

You looked forward and folded your hands as you listened to Father Milton. You never cared much for his talk of hellfire and brimstone, to be fair, your daddy didn’t either, but in a small town, everyone knew when one was away from service. Roy never cared what anyone thought but you had to deal with Noreen and the other ladies at the grocer or around town about their own tasks.

When mass finished, you stood but Arvin hesitated. He stared up at the altar before he finally rose. He nodded to you and followed you and the other worshippers out into the sun.

You heard your name as you headed for the truck. You stopped and Arvin did too. You turned as Noreen, a woman older than yourself who fashioned herself to be the model for all society ladies, approached you. She wore a wide-brimmed hat over her blonde hair and took short steps in her heels.

“You promised me that carrot cake recipe. The one with the raisins.” She said. “Now I’ve been hounding you for three weeks.”

“Oh, uh,” you unclasped your pocketbook and fished out the card you’d made sure to stow after last Sunday. “Right here. I’m sorry, Noreen, but I gotta get back.”

“Where is Roy? Was he off drinkin’ again? You know, the lord did warn us all against excess.”

“Well, perhaps we can get him to come next week and you can warn him,” Arvin intoned and Noreen looked over in shock.

“Excuse me. And who is this… man you have as your escort?”

“Roy is letting the attic out to him. They work together. This is Arvin.”

“Arvin Russell,” he introduced firmly. 

“That’s an unusual name,” Noreen remarked, “You’re not from here?”

“No, but from a place like this.” He countered, “I’m gonna go get the truck goin’.”

He turned without courtesy and marched away. You looked back to Noreen as she curled her lip.

“Oh, he is a rough one, isn’t he? You have that scoundrel livin’ with you?”

“He’s a good man. Helps around the house. It’s a big place and Missy Grable has a tenant of her own.”

“Missy Grable has a farmhand to tend the fields,” Noreen lifted her chin.

You weren’t certain what to say. Noreen always found issue with whatever you said and you hated to give her further reason to.

“Well, here’s the recipe. I really ought to go.” You said.

“I understand, honey,” She smirked, “Your husband needs his caretaker… oh sorry, wife.”

You flinched but said nothing else. Your shoulders dropped as you turned away and dragged your heels through the dirt. You opened the truck and climbed in without a word. You clutched your pocketbook and stared ahead as Arvin back out of the lot.

“Pardon my saying so and I don’t use this word often, but she was a bitch,” Arvin said. “Remind me why I ain’t go to church.”

You looked down and nervously unclasped and unclasped your purse. “You didn’t have to come.”

“No, it’s your house and I wanna be a good guest,” he said, “It’s nothing to do with you.”

You scoffed and shook your head. “My daddy hated goin’ too but he didn’t want me to be ostracised, you know? He told me, near the end, that he stopped believin’ durin’ the war. He said no god would let the things happen that he saw.” You leaned against the door and watched the buildings pass. “Seein’ how these Christians act, I can’t blame him.”

Arvin was quiet as you left the main street and the house began to thin out until the country sprawled out around you.

“My sister…” he said so low you barely heard him. He cleared his throat and spoke louder. “My cousin, she was tricked by a preacher man. She was young and too willing to love. And he was just a liar. He knocked her up then refused her.” His voice was brittle and you glanced over as his hand tightened on the steering wheel. “She hung herself but it was that snake-tongued charlatan who killed her.” He shook his head. “No god would take her like that. No god would let a man sworn to him trick the innocent.” He rubbed his forehead as his eyes bore into the distance, “I’m sorry. Just been a while since I sat in a pew.”

“No, I’m… sorry. Sorry about your cousin.” You said, “I didn’t-- You can stay home next week.”

He pondered it and a little smile curled his lips. “Don’t think I will. Think I’d like to see that Noreen again. Maybe say a prayer for her soul, wherever it may be.”

🚬

Roy was still in bed when you got home. You tried to rouse him and he swatted you away. You brought him a sandwich and some water and left it beside him. You went back down to clean up as Arvin sat in the front room, As you wiped your hands, the record player buzzed and a tune rose on noontime air.

You went to the living room as Arvin stood straight and you listened to the smooth tones of Sinatra. He turned to you as you entered. 

“I like this one,” you said. 

“Me too,” He had shed the jacket and unbuttoned the top button of his shirt, his tie disposed of. He turned his palm up as he stepped away from the player. “You dance?”

You giggled and shook your head. “No, not much of a dancer. Roy wouldn’t even at the wedding.”

“Come on. It’s a good song.” He got closer and began to sing out of tune, “I get no kick from champagne. Mere alcohol doesn't thrill me at all…”

You shied away and he caught your hand. You let him draw you closer and smiled as your cheeks warmed up.

“Just follow my lead,” he urged as he moved his feet, “Don’t look down, just one, two, one, two…” 

You moved your feet around his as he swayed you and turned you on the spot. His hand settled on your lower back and you grasped his shoulders. You were jittery as you moved with him in time to the music.

“Arvin…” You breathed. 

“Every pretty girl should dance,” he said, “I’d say you’re a hell of a dancer for a beginner.”

“Thanks,” you trilled and settled into his embrace.

“I mean it. You deserve more.” He leaned closer and you felt his hot breath on you. “You deserve the world.”

You smiled as he gazed across at you. Your heart leapt as there was a sudden clamour by the stairs and you pushed away from Arvin as Roy stomped into the doorframe. His hand fell away from your back and you tiptoed over to your husband.

“Roy, you’re awake? How ya feelin’?”

“All this goddamn noise you makin’ down here,” he grumbled, “Shut off that dang thing. There’s a game on.”

You flitted away and turned off the Victrola. You looked at Arvin as he watched Roy. He looked irritated and repulsed by the man.

“I gotta do some chores,” you muttered. “You boys enjoy the game.”

“I think I’m just gonna go upstairs,” Arvin tucked his hands in his pockets. “I’ll be down to cook that fish in a bit.”

You watched the younger man leave and Roy turned the dial on the radio. Your husband flopped onto the couch as the commentator’s voice filled the room.

“How about a beer?” He demanded, not asked.

🚬

The day turned to night. Dinner was quiet and tense. Roy didn’t drink as much as the day before but the alcohol made little difference. Arvin was pensive and seemed to lose himself in thought. You were nervous as you thought of the dance and your temperamental husband.

You hadn’t done anything wrong. It was just a dance. How come Roy could spend his days drunk and dozing and you couldn’t do anything you liked?

You cleaned up after supper. Arvin retreated to his room once more as Roy sat in the living room with another bottle and you tidied up. You cleared the last of the mess and looked out into the front room. Roy belched and sneered as he saw you.

“Wife,” he beckoned you forward with two fingers, “What did you do today?”

“Went to church. Cleaned.” You edged closer. “That’s all. I was real worried about you, Roy.”

“Were you?” He snorted and stood as he dropped his bottle on the table. “You didn’t seem too bothered when I came down.”

“What do you mean?” You stopped a foot away from him.

“You and that kid. You get on real well, don’t ya?” He snickered. “You down here dancing.”

“Just a dance, Roy,” you said meekly, “I didn’t wanna be rude.”

“You just wanna be a whore,” he snarled, “Huh? What you doin’ with that boy? I’m your husband.”

“I know, I know that, Roy. I never-- I didn’t do nothing.” You pleaded as he stepped closer. “I was just waitin’ for you to wake up.”

“Shut your fucking mouth,” he hissed as he grabbed the back of your head and thrust you close to him. “You been doin’ everything but what a wife is meant for.”

He tore open the front of your dress and you cried out. “I’m gonna fuck you and let that boy hear who you belong to.”

“Stop, please.”

“Stop!? This is what you promised me, dear wife.”

You struggled with him as the smell of alcohol on his breath made you cringe. He spun you and shoved you so hard you stumbled back against the couch. You got up as he ambled after you and were knocked back by his fist. You cradled your cheek as you fell onto the cushions.

He pushed you up against the back of the couch and tried to wrench your legs apart. You squeezed your knees together and slapped at him blindly as fear bubbled in your veins. He forced your legs open and knelt on the couch between them. He grabbed your throat as you tried to wriggle away and he struck you again. He never hit your face; he didn’t like people to see what he did to you.

“I’ll show you,” he muttered, “I’ll show you, you little whore.”

He reached for his fly but his face mirrored your shock as he suddenly stilled and for a moment, he froze in time before he fell back onto the floor. Arvin stepped aside to avoid the crash and turned to hit him across the face. Roy’s brow split and began to stream with blood.

Arvin struck him a third time and pointed the gun at his head as he laid prone on the floor. Roy touched the back of his skull as he stared up barrel. The whack from the butt of the gun would likely leave a worse lump than his punches.

“Get up and go.” Arvin growled. “Or I’m gonna smear this carpet with your brains.”

“Are you crazy? This is my house!” Roy barked and pushed himself up. The pistol clicked and Arvin pressed it to his head. 

“It’s her daddy’s house.”

“She’s my wife, boy.”

“You don’t act like no husband,” Arvin said gruffly, “You think I’m scared? Think I haven’t shot a man before?”

“Sure you have, boy.”

“It’s different. You go out and you hunt your bucks and they don’t know what’s comin’, they don’t even know when they shot. But a man, oh he knows to the end. He begs, even if he can’t speak, he does. It’s in his eyes, in the way he gurgles as the life drains from his lips.” Arvin kicked Roy, “And once I pull this trigger, you’ll be begging too but it’ll be too late and there ain’t no words you can say to stop the blood. So you shut up and you go before you can’t.”

You were paralysed on the couch. Your head throbbed as you couldn’t believe what you were seeing. You trembled as Roy stood slowly and winced as Arvin followed his movement with the muzzle of the gun. Arvin followed your husband to the door and you heard the sharp whine of the other before it clattered shut. 

Crickets chirped as dirt stirred beneath feet and you heard the old truck shudder to life. The door snapped shut and locked loudly. Arvin appeared and lowered the gun. You stared at it as he came close. He set it on the table and sat beside you as he touched your face and you winced.

“Are you okay?” He asked as he pulled you against him, “I’m sorry he hurt you. I shoulda-- shoulda been faster.”

“Arv…” Your voice turned to a wisp and you let him hold you.

“Shhh, it’s okay. I got you now.”

[moral-turpitudes]

For The Family:

Masterlist | Rules | Peaky Prompts

Trigger Warnings: Swearing, Angst, Fighting/Arguing, Pregnancy, Fluff.

Word Count: 2,572

Characters: Thomas Shelby x Female!Reader

Requested: Yes

Requested by: Anon, it can be found here.

Summary: One argument and a million frazzled nerves sends Y/N running out the doors of Shelby Company Limited, causing Thomas to re-evaluate his plans and think about more than himself for once.

One minute.

One minute was all it took for her to walk out, heels stomping through the shop halls of Shelby Company Limited and to the car. Not caring that she and Thomas rode in together that morning. He was resourceful, so he could surely find another way home, if he could make it home that is.

The morning had started out as usual, her husband calling a family meeting to discuss the days events and the legitimate business. Giving them all a rundown of the numbers and telling her and Lizzie about what papers needed filing. But not long after everyone had been given their tasks, he made one final remark. “I have a plan to discuss though, before you all go.” He said, putting his cigarette out.

“God what is it now?” Polly asked rolling her eyes in Y/N’s direction. She smirked slightly, avoiding her husbands gaze as she clasped her hands in front of her, preparing for whatever it is he’d say next.

“I’m going to go after the men who trashed our pub.” He said, looking at the paper on the table that talked about the recent bombing of the place.

“They’ll just come after us again though. What if they plant bombs here aye Tom? We’ll be fookin’ blown to bits.” Arthur said looking out the window. Paranoia already setting in.

“We’ll be fine. They’re getting what’s coming to them.” Thomas said, noticing his wife tensing up as he looked over towards her, her usual relaxed demeanor long gone. The ring on her finger that she was looking at, disappearing as the tears welled up in her eyes.

Polly sighed and clicked her manicured nails against her teacup, hoping that whatever strategy he had planned was good, knowing he’d go through with it no matter who tried to stop him.

“How do you know?” Y/N asked, wiping away her tears as the thought of bombs surrounding the shop ran through her mind.

“What?” Thomas asked, his voice even and unbothered by his family’s concerns.

“How do you know we’ll be fine huh? You said that three months ago and there I was trying to keep you from bleeding out on our driveway.” She said, cringing at the thought of when he’d come home miraculously after being shot in the abdomen, mere inches away from anything vital.

“That was different. This is a another gang with different ways of doing things.” He said, dismissing her concern as the family grew antsy.

“No it’s not. They all have the same fucking goals in mind, Thomas.” She said quietly, going straight to the bathroom. Not bothering to lock the door as she’d made quite the scene.

“When do we go?” John asked, breaking the awkward silence as Thomas tore his gaze from his wife’s empty seat.

Thomas didn’t answer him as he stormed out after her, not bothering to knock as he waltzed right in. “What were you trying to do back there aye? What the hell is wrong with you?” He asked, an anger to his voice that was usually only reserved for his brothers.

“Why are you in here yelling at me? I was trying to get you to think about your fucking family. You say everything is fine, you say everything will work out but how do you know?...” She asked as he stood there without an answer.

“That’s right. You don’t. But you go along with everything anyways not bothering to think about anyone else other than yourself and your little agenda! I’m tired of it.” She spat, looking at him angrily as she realized that was one of the only times she truly yelled at the man.

“I’m doing this to protect the family!” He said, running a hand over his tired face. Y/N looked at him for a few moments, her warm eyes meeting his ice cold ones.

“You signed up for this Y/N.” He said, inching closer to her.

“The only thing I signed up for was to love you. I didn’t sign up to watch us get blown up or to be pawns in your little games. I’m done.” She said, holding her palm to her stomach, the familiar nauseous feeling returning for the third time that week.

“I won’t let them hurt us.” He said, trying to take her hand in his but feeling her turn away.

“Tommy...you don’t realize how many nights I’ve stayed up for you. How many nights I’ve seen you in your office half alive. How many times I’ve dragged myself in here not wondering if I’d ever see you again. You don’t realize who all needs you, and I’m afraid you may never realize it because we’ll all be dead because of you one day.” She said turning to face him, her face pale and her hands shaking as she wiped her tears away once more.

“Why are you so worried about everything now aye? You know I have to do this or it’ll get worse.” He said, more quietly than before.

“Because....I can’t stand the thought of losing you. I know I can’t do anything to stop that but I can’t sit around here or at the house worrying all day. I have more to think about now...more to protect.” She said, leaning against the counter as he walked over to her, putting his arms around her in a tight hug.

“What are you not telling me aye?” He asked, his voice quiet like before, a hint of genuine concern in his voice.

“I’m pregnant, Tom...Just found out last week while you were gone. I was going to tell you later today but...I couldn’t after that meeting. It made me sick thinking about all the possibilities.” She said, looking down at the tiled floor. Her heart hurt at knowing he’d leave her again when she’d only recently gotten him back from one of his “missions.”

Thomas stood there and sighed, the gears shifting in his mind as he thought about what he could and couldn’t do. All the decisions he could make put them at risk, or more so himself, but this forced him to look at things slightly differently. She needed him there, now more than ever, and blowing himself up or getting himself shot wouldn’t do the family any good. But deep down he knew he had to do something.

“You’re thinking of another plan...I can’t believe you.” She spat, walking out of the shop and towards the car, knowing the safest place to be was probably their house.

Thomas punched the counter, frustrated at the woman he loved, the impact stinging his hand as he went back into his office.

“Get your things ready gentlemen. We’re going this evening. Pol I need you to tell me when you knew.” He said quickly, John quirking an eyebrow as he loaded his shotgun.

“She told me she felt off last week, so I read her tea leaves. She didn’t want to tell you until you came back, and it wasn’t my place to tell her business.” She said.

“What’s our dear sister in law hiding aye? She left here in a hurry after all that.” Arthur said.

“She’s pregnant.” Thomas said lighting a cigarette, an expression on his face that was hard to pin down. Frustration, happiness, fear, sorrow, all of them danced around his head as he thought through his plan.

“Well let’s get this over with then brother. You have some making up to do since she left like she did.” Arthur said.

“My wife is my concern Arthur. Just get the guns, get the grenades, and get in the car.” He said sternly.

“....right.” Arthur said, giving Polly a quick hug and patting John on the back before heading out to his car.

“She’s worried about everyone, about me, about the bombs. Hell she’s the safest of all of us if she’s at home though.” Thomas said, mumbling as Polly watched him.

“Of course she’s worried Tom. You plan this stuff out on a whim and expect everyone to go along. What she needs is support and to know you’ll be okay. You’re her husband and the father of her child for Christ’s sake, at least try to not get yourself killed so you can see the poor thing. God...Planning all these things and throwing bombs whenever ya please will only get ya that much closer to your grave.” She said walking out of the room.

Thomas stood there with a blank stare, his cigarette dangling from his lips as he went over the last hour in his head. For as many things he planned, Y/N always knew how to keep him on his toes, and this by far was the best, yet most frustrating one. He wanted to be there for her, and he never doubted that for a second. But he couldn’t guarantee his safety and he knew she was right about that. So with all his will, he sauntered out to the car, telling the boys the new plan, and hauling off to finish the job, praying to nothing in particular that they’d all make it home.

As the hours passed by, the sunlight soon faded as a grenade was thrown, taking out the last three men that they couldn’t shoot down. It wasn’t his plan to start out, since he wanted to bomb their whole operation, but for Y/N’s sake, he told his brothers to use one bomb to avoid hurting themselves, and innocent people nearby. They had enough ammo to take down the rest, even if they had to take cover behind the rickety barstools and old tables.

“You sure you didn’t want to use those other grenades Tom? Just take down the whole building?” Arthur asked breathlessly as they loaded up the car.

“No. Wasn’t worth it. We can use the others some other time.” He said shortly, not wanting to discuss how he’d stopped himself from throwing the others out of love for her. Thinking it would make him seem weak.

“Alright, well let’s get back. You have some explaining to do at home.” Arthur said driving as fast as he could to Thomas’ manor to drop him off. With a small salute, they drove off, John smoking a cigar out the back as they disappeared into the night.

The house was quiet as Thomas arrived, the only light coming from his study as the door was cracked open. Music was playing lightly as he opened the door, Y/N lying on one of the lounge chairs with a book lazily in her hand. Her eyes closed and a soft snore escaping her lips as she slept by the fire.

Thomas plucked the book from her hand gently, putting it back on the bookshelf. Noticing how she shuffled around in her sleep, her brow furrowing almost in worry like a bad dream. Quietly, he walked over to his desk, taking off his coat and everything else work related until he was in his pants and dress shirt, the gun that was nestled in its holster gently placed on the desk as well.

With a swift movement, he gently picked her up, carrying her to their room. The lavish king bed greeting them both as he laid her down, Y/N almost instinctively reaching for him despite their earlier argument.

“Goodnight love. We’ll talk in the morning.” He said as he ran his hand down her back, settling in beside her.

“I love you...” She mumbled before drifting off once again.

“Love you too.” He said quietly knowing she was out. With a small kiss to her head he laid his head back against his pillow, dreams of Y/N and their child filling his mind for once instead of horrid nightmares.

The next morning he awoke to Y/N retching in the bathroom, the morning sickness finally living up to its name as the week went on.

Thomas got up in concern, lightly tapping on the door.

“You alright love? Can I get you anything?” He asked.

“No. I’m fine.” She said shortly, her brain fog from the nights sleep clearing from her mind as she remembered their fight. Her heart aching at his reaction and at his decision he’d made to continue with his plan last night.

After washing up, she finally left the restroom, haphazardly putting her clothes on as she looked at the clock. The time reading dangerously close to when they’d usually leave for work.

“We’re going to be late. Why aren’t you getting ready?” She asked.

“We’re taking the day off.” He said sitting back into the lavish pillows and lighting a cigarette.

Y/N scoffed, and sat next to him, her mind racing to how he’d be up and begging to go to work in less than an hour.

“Tommy Shelby taking a day off? That’s fucking unheard of.” She said, reaching for his hand that was now draped over her leg.

“We need it. Even if it’s only for today.” He said.

“Why?” She asked, messing with the few rings he had on his fingers.

“We need to talk about yesterday. And....I didn’t have the best reaction....so I wanted to apologize. You have me to yourself for the rest of the day.” He said, a slight smirk on his face.

Y/N sighed as she remembered, their heated argument filling the walls of the shop restroom as she tried to get him to see reason, knowing not even she could get him to change his mind, or so she thought.

“I changed my plan last night. I was going to bomb the whole place...but uh...when I looked at them....I saw you. I only used one and we shot the rest.” He said, hating he had to tell her the details but that unfortunately came with the territory of marrying a gang leader.

“Really? Only one?” She asked, her eyes flicking up to his as they laid their on the bed.

“Mhmm. Didn’t want to hurt other people ‘round there. I saw women and their children near the place...and it got me thinking of what you’d said earlier...I couldn’t use more after that.” He said, finally coming to peace with the fact he didn’t have to completely obliterate the place to get his message across, saving innocent lives in the long run.

Y/N smiled as she gazed into his eyes, trying not to drown in the ocean blue orbs as he took her hand in his and brought it up to his lips.

“I know I didn’t have the best reaction yesterday to the news...but I am happy. I can’t wait to see them. And I know you’ll be a wonderful mother. I couldn’t be happier, love.” He said softly, gently resting his hand atop her stomach and kissing her temple.

Y/N nodded, a sense of relief flowing off her as she finally knew he wasn’t upset. Even if she’d had Polly find out before him.

“Thank you...” She said quietly, the sunlight streaming in through windows as she pulled him closer to her, not wanting to let him go anytime soon.

“Are we going to lie in bed all day?” He asked.

“You said I had ya all to myself, I can think of a few other things we could do.” She said, smirking at him as she pulled him in for a kiss. Both of them looking forward to spending the day with each other, even though it was a rare occurrence.

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