#i was about to say oh woe is me i didn't have any college friends back during my birthday

[skitskatdacat63]

1, 13, 15?

1. "Song of the year?"

Definitely "I Want The One I Can't Have" - The Smiths, specifically this one live version. It makes me insane, I've listened to it so many times, and it still makes me super happy

13. "How was your birthday this year?"

I realized the other day that I literally couldn't remember at all what I did on my birthday, and I had to look back at my pictures 😭 I think I just had dinner with my parents? I don't even remember what I ate....Birthdays are a lot less momentous and fun when you're an adult and all your irl friends live at college 3 hours away </3

15. "What’s a bad habit you picked up this year?"

Technically I picked it up last year but definitely my red bull addiction 😬 I drink way too many, way too often

[brucewaynehater101]

I have a really soft and cute au for Lesbian Janet that could work in any universe but I think works best in the Young Justice TV Show Universe.

See, everyone gets really confused when Tim talks about his Mom, sometimes referring to her as Mama. Tim thinks that using two different titles like that should make it Obvious that he has Two Moms but well. The Bats may be Super Geniuses but they are still Idiots. Tim is also an absolute Mama's Boy with Both his Moms. He loves them both So Much.

Oh, where is Jack you ask? He doesn't actually exist. He's the fake name and personality that Tim's Mama came up with and used Magic to disguise as so they could get Legally Married For Tax Benifits. Also to get his Mama a legal identity. Why would she need one of those? Well... as was mentioned, Tim's Mama has Magic with a Captial M. This by extension means Tim is Magic With A Capital M as well. Totally has nothing to do with Janet and his Mama sculpting him from clay and breathing life into him. Woes of pregnancy who? Not Janet that's for sure.

Also Tim does Not tell anyone that he has Magic and he doesn't show it off. The only reason the Bats found out about it is because Tim came to a meeting with Bruce and Diana went "you. Your Magic is Familure but I don't know from where." And Tim was sweating while saying, "Magic? What magic??" And after getting questioned by Diana and Bruce he Caves and tells them a half truth, "fine. I was made from Clay, like you. My Mom didn't want to go through the struggles of Childbirth but still wanted a child. Instead of adopting like any sane and rational person, she made a deal with a God or Godess. I don't know all the details but she owed them something in exchange for Me. I do know the debt has been paid already though."

The debt was simply a tea spoon of blood for the ritual and A Kiss. Janet over paid the second part by a lot.

As for how Janet met and wooed A Goddess? Well, she was on a dig in Greece when her boat she was using to get to another island was caught in a storm and washed up on a different island. The Goddess was expecting violence or anger at being stranded, perhaps even Sorrow. But no, Janet took one look at the Temple in the distance and was pushing past her saying she needed to get to the Temple because it's clearly in *amazing* condition and could bring So Many insights into Ancient Greek culture and building practice. For the first time in decades, as this Random Woman ran her hand along a pillar and started rambling about the design and what the type of collums were called, Circe felt herself blushing.

CIRCE?!?!?

FUCK YEAH.

Anyways, this is absolutely adorable. Fuck. I would love an entire fic of Janet. Here's a general plot line:

Janet hasn't ever really been interested in romance. She's tried dating a few guys in high school for appearance sake, but she usually broke the relationship off when they became too affectionate.

This is when others started referring to her as "cold." She wasn't, but few people got close enough to her to listen to her rambles about ancient civilizations, archeology, and sociality impacts of culture. She enjoyed other stuff, but nothing quite lit her up like those topics did.

In college, she did find and make a few friends with similar interests. This is where she figured out she was into women and not men. The relationships lasted longer, but she was single by the time she graduated with her bachelor's.

Her master's ends up as some sort of work study where she travels the world. She's more invested in her studies and work than relationships at this point. She enjoys learning about people's lives and cultures but doesn't seek out more than friendship.

I'm not sure if Janet has already or is working on her doctorate by the time she ends up lost on an island (or really how archeology even pays bills).

When she arrives on the island, there's a beautiful woman there as well. Janet notices this, but doesn't give a flying fuck in comparison to the architecture.

And Circe? Finds herself amused and confused by this woman who, although is into women, doesn't care about Circe's looks. Janet just keeps asking questions about Circe's life, the temple, the plants, the culture, etc. It becomes endearing watching her work late into the night with her research.

Janet is so enthralled in all that is going on that she doesn't notice Circe's continuous flirting. It's so fucking frustrating for Circe, but makes her unbearably fond as well. Janet starts to consider this drop dead gorgeous woman a close friend of hers as they "work" late into the chatting about ancient Greece, their past experiences, and their lives. Janet, who has some experience with romance but not much, even flirts back. After all, women call each other beautiful all the time and hold hands and shit. Surely Janet can platonically cuddle with her friend while Circe compares Janet's eyes to the night sky.

It's only when Janet is ready to leave that she realizes that she's willing to give up everything she's worked for, all of her findings and education, to have more time with Circe. Janet is in love with her best friend.

Also, Circe is able to get a fake ID as "Jack" due to magic and Janet's connections

[pupintransit]

I'm gonna try not to have this be a self-indulgent "woe is me" sort of post. I'm probably not gonna succeed. I might not even hit post once i'm done. But i wanted to at least try to write about how i'm feeling, if for no other reason than to read it back and see if i agree with myself.

The goal of posting pics and stories of myself online, much like any other social media influencer, is to engage with folks and build an audience. My content is largely self-published pornography, so there's an additional goal of being an attractive sex object. And while i'll never be an overnight sensation the feedback I've gotten has been really positive, and i've made a few genuine friendships because of it! It's also incredibly affirming to have so many people comment positively on my body. I love feeling desired and i'm really motivated to start a JustForFans after surgery.

Now, as seems to be the theme of these posts lately, I'm feeling weird about a positive circumstance that should instead summon joy. Part of me is waiting for the other shoe to drop and reveal that this experience has been an elaborate prank.

I was never popular as a kid, nor was I particularly popular as a younger adult early in college. I didn't like how i looked back then and feedback from others, most notably getting asked out as a prank pulled on someone else, fed into that. Throw an abusive (now ex, thankfully) partner into the mix who sneered and bullied rather than talking about his feelings honestly, and a handful of other anxieties I don't know how to describe accurately, and bada-bing bada-boom i'm left with more self-esteem issues than most folks i know.

Over time it got easier. I dunno if I had a glow up, fell in with kinder people, or both, but i don't have nearly the same shame put upon my body as i used to. As modest as my following is, people still tune in regularly and have wonderful things to say about me and how i look. The friendships i've made also feel warm and genuine, and i can share so much of myself with them. But it's hard to accept it all as real sometimes, and i don't know how to finally overcome that.

Now you might be thinking to yourself "What, you had a bad time in high school and now you're scared to have people tell you how great your nudes are? Oh, the tears of the chad! I wish I had your problems." And I just.... do you though? I don't revel in second guessing every nice thing somebody tells me, or worrying if my friends will one day start being snide instead of honest. Somehow i don't think you do either.

I may want to phone my therapist.