#i wanted to vote for a tomura chapter but i have too many... i almost went w/good morning! or his fight against endvr tbh

[gradelstuff]

I voted for Dabi's Dance as the best chapter in the Week 3 poll. It's still super iconic and it out-trended the US election on twitter lol. Also,, I think it's the villain chapter with the best chance of ending up on the ranking list (hopefully)

[makeste]

BnHA 323: “I Don’t Know How to Explain to You That You Should Care About Other People”

Previously on BnHA: Kacchan was all, “Izuku, I’m sorry.” Bakugou Stans were all, “[sobs for a week straight and tearfully awards him the Nobel Prize for character development].” Deku was all, “[faints in Kacchan’s arms].” Iida was all, “[trying to decide if Ochako genuinely tried to kill him a few minutes ago].” Horikoshi was all, “NO TIME FOR HUGS WE MUST GET BACK TO UA.” The civilians holed up at U.A. were all, “WE TOOK A VOTE AND DECIDED THAT WE’RE ALL GOING TO BE JERKS ABOUT THIS AND MAKE A BIG FUSS ABOUT YOU LETTING DEKU BACK INTO THE SCHOOL.” Deku was all “[stands there looking like he expected nothing less and breaking my heart more and more with each passing moment].” Ochako was all, “that does it, looks like I’m gonna have to do something about this... next chapter, that is.”

Today on BnHA: Flashback!Rat Principal is all “I just want you all to know that I spent nine million dollars turning U.A. into a giant Battleship-style grid that can burrow underground and zoom around in a giant subway maze because Horikoshi lacks a grounded understanding of both civil engineering and economics.” Back in the present day, Jeanist is all, “EVERYONE TAKE HEED, MY COMRADES AND I HAVE DEEMED IT EXPEDIENT TO CONVEY THIS AUSPICIOUS YOUTH BACK TO THIS STRONGHOLD. WE ANTICIPATE THAT WE MAY DEPEND UPON YOUR GOODWILL AND ACQUIESCENCE TO THESE TERMS.” The civilians were all, “NO.” Ochako was all, “EMPATHY, MOTHERFUCKERS, DO YOU SPEAK IT?!” The civilians were all, “oh shit.” Anyway so Ochako is a giant badass, but I’m a little worried that she’s going to get struck by lightning. Please come down from there.

so before we start this chapter, I would just like to apologize for having not posted the ch 321 recap yet, and would like to reassure everyone, and especially Iida who is staring at me with Sad Wobbly Guilt Trip Eyes, that I will get to that as soon as I can

OMG FLASHBACK??

yes please Horikoshi please show us more of class 1-A and their Deku intervention strategy jam sessions

oh dear

Iida you are too pure and good for this cruel world. [sprays the U.A. civilians with a water bottle] NO. BAD CIVILIANS! NO OSTRACIZING SCARED AND EXHAUSTED CHILDREN IN THE HOUSE

EXCUSE ME RAT PRINCIPAL WHAT’S WITH THESE MIXED MESSAGES

???

RAT PRINCIPAL: he’s free to return to us at any time!!

ALSO RAT PRINCIPAL: but it’s too risky for him to return to us

?? ??????? ?????????????????????

so now he’s going on about how strong the U.A. Barrier is, and how it’s comparable to the defensive capabilities of Tartarus. this would have sounded a lot more impressive before chapter 297 lol

OH!!!! HELLO, WHAT’S THIS!!!

A TIMELY CALLBACK TO A CERTAIN MYSTERIOUS EVENT WHICH HASN’T BEEN REFERENCED SINCE USJ? [U.A. TRAITOR MUSIC INTENSIFIES]

so now Rat Principal says he upgraded U.A.’s security systems with his own “modifications”, whatever the fuck that means. I mean look, I’ve been saying for a long time now that U.A. is the best place for everyone to hole up, don’t get me wrong. but that was mostly on account of there not being any other practical alternatives. but you’re making it sound like you figured out a way to actually make it Decay-proof or some wild shit like that

-- hold up, DID YOU ADD A FORCE FIELD. DID YOU TRICK THIS SCHOOL OUT WAKANDA-STYLE YOU CRAZY MARSUPIAL. HOLY SHIT. because that would actually be perfect

LMAO

WHAT KIND OF GALAXY BRAIN BULLSHIT. “NAH THERE’S NO NEED FOR A FORCE FIELD, LET’S JUST PUT WHEELS ON IT”

oh okay so the whole campus is basically capable of burrowing itself underground. that’s insane lol I wonder how they pulled that off. probably got poor Cementoss working overtime

blah blah blah so basically the entire campus is split into a grid and each section of the grid is capable of its own independent movement. lol this is just the Merone Base from KHR. you thought no one would notice this casual plagiarism ten years after the fact, but YOU UNDERESTIMATED YOUR AUDIENCE, HORIKOSHI

“joke’s on you imma just lampshade it” WELL ALL RIGHT THEN

“look at me I’m so fucking self-aware” fucking swear to god. I can’t believe this man is my favorite mangaka of all time smdh

“excuse me, I wasn’t finished describing all the rest of this bullshit yet,” Rat Principal breaks in impatiently. “we also added a steel wall all around the underground of the campus that’s 3000 steel plates thick. that’s fifteen fucking meters of solid fucking steel just fyi. and if anyone fucks around with any part of it the defense system will activate immediately! and also all of the plates are independently motorized, whatever the fuck that means!! in conclusion you’re gonna need a fucking tower crane to suspend all of your disbelief by the time I’m through with this paragraph”

“also Shiketsu is almost as reinforced as U.A. but not quite because we still had to make sure we were better.” but of course. and apparently the two schools are connected via a secret tunnel as Hagakure mentioned earlier

LSDKFJLSDKJFLK

“WAIT WHAT” LMAO YOU HEARD HIM, NOW INASA CAN VISIT YOU BOTH IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND TELL YOU ALL ABOUT THE WEIRD DREAM HE HAD. GOD BLESS YOU HORIKOSHI

(ETA: moment of appreciation for Shouto and Katsuki having the same thought at the same time and making Knowing Eye Contact and saying the exact same thing out loud in perfect unison like the best friends they are. what a blessed day.)

so Tokoyami is all “but wait if you engineered all this shit all the way back during the Band arc how did you even know that Tomura’s quirk awakening would become a thing, Horikoshi -- uh, I mean, Principal Nezu”

and Rat Principal is all “lol idk”

“basically I just woke up one morning and was all ‘say, you know what this school really needs? a fifteen-meter-thick underground steel wall, and the ability to break up into little pieces that individually zoom around wherever the fuck they want.’ jesus christ. lol if money and common sense were apparently no obstacle why didn’t you just teleport U.A. to the fucking moon or something. maybe I should shut up before I given him any ideas

dsfaelkjldkjgl

you heard it here first, folks, all of this cost a grand total of nine million U.S. dollars. well technically it cost “more than” nine million dollars. never has that distinction been more important lmao. are we sure this barrier was really made of steel and not cardboard? who the hell sold it to them, Ea-Nasir??

this is my favorite manga series of all time. yes I am ashamed

“in conclusion please do your best to reach Deku-kun” SO WHAT WAS ALL THAT NONSENSE ABOUT IT BEING TOO RISKY THEN. anyway thank you for this super informative and edifying flashback, Horikoshi. I will cherish it always. I don’t even want to read another translation of this absurdity lmao, there’s something special about it just the way it is. pretty sure Horikoshi just had a cracked out fever dream one night and transferred it to the pages of the manga verbatim

anyway so back to the unruly mob

not their finest moment. please excuse me while I cover poor Deku’s ears and give him a good shoosh pap

oh wow the parents are out here too

is Mitsuki trying to hold Inko back?? that’s the last thing this fandom needs right now is more Mitsuki discourse fffwlkjs. and even Jiroudad, scientifically proven to be the best dad in all of BnHA, is just standing there silently looking vaguely unhappy. way to rise to the moment you guys

MONOMA

so this settles it for me that Aizawa is not at UA. I know a lot of people have been wondering about his whereabouts, and if I had to wager a guess it would be that something happened with Shirakumo/Kurogiri. I can’t think of anything else -- even the loss of an eye and a limb -- that would keep him from his kids at a time like this

anyway but this is excellent Monoma content right here though. I love that he apparently adopted Eri after a single interaction with her. also WHERE IS SHINSOU DAMMIT. THE PEOPLE NEED TO KNOW

and Kouta’s there too looking like he wants to run over to Deku but Ragdoll won’t let him :/

it’s gotta be pretty upsetting for him to see his hero like this and not having anyone stand up for him. [taps megaphone] IS THIS THING ON. OKAY YEAH IT SEEMS TO BE WORKING. AHEM. PAGING URARAKA OCHAKO. GONNA NEED YOU TO GET OVER HERE ALREADY AND MAKE THAT BIG DRAMATIC SPEECH WHICH YOU ARE CLEARLY DYING TO MAKE. IF YOU DON’T DO IT SOON I’M GONNA HAVE TO STEP IN, AND YOU REALLY DON’T WANT ME TO DO THAT SINCE MY SPEECH WILL NOT BE VERY GOOD OR INSPIRING, AND WILL PROBABLY JUST CONSIST OF “HELLO, YOU ARE ALL STUPID, PLEASE SHUT UP AND GO AWAY”

so now Mic is telling them to calm down. at least someone’s speaking up here, geez

OH MY GOD

MY MAN JEANIST OUT HERE DOING WHAT HE DOES BEST: MAKING EVERYONE FEEL GUILTY AND JUDGED

OH MY GOD HE IS GIVING SUCH A LONG AND BORING SPEECH LMAO IS YOUR STRATEGY TO PUT THEM ALL TO SLEEP OR WHAT

truly in awe of this man’s ability to take messages which could easily be conveyed in ELI5-speak, and stubbornly convert them into incomprehensible language the likes of which you need a graduate degree in order to understand

“hey guys, so originally our plan was to use Deku as bait for the villains, but that didn’t really work and also we realized it was kinda dumb and was probably gonna get him killed, so we brought him back here instead.” was that really so hard, Jeanist. also are we all really just gonna sit back here and watch Jeanist take full credit for Bakugou’s plan just like that lmao

(ETA:

WHERE DID ENDEAVOR GO AND WHO IS THIS DIABOLICAL MASTER OF DISGUISE. lol I genuinely didn’t notice this because I was too busy digging through thesauruses trying to rewrite Jeanist’s speech; many thanks to @class1akids​ for pointing it out and making my day immeasurably better. take it easy there Dick Tracy.)

“anyway so please stop being dicks and let him fucking rest so he can save all your ungrateful asses” what an impassioned and inspiring plea. time to see if the masses will listen to reason

narrator: they did not listen to reason

oh my god finally Ochako is doing something. YEAH OCHAKO WOOOO SHOW THEM HOW IT’S DONE

hmm

this entire chapter is truly and utterly nonsensical to me lol

(ETA: on my second readthrough I’m fucking dying at how she stole the megaphone right out of Mic’s hand lmao. and how Kacchan is all “fuck yeah nothing I appreciate more than some quality fucking larceny.”)

oh I see she was jumping on top of the main building so as to scream down at them all more impressively

“ANYWAY DEKU IS PRETTY COOL ACTUALLY, YOU GUYS ARE JUST MEAN” couldn’t have said it better myself Ochako

lol uh

gotta say I did not have “Ochako reveals the secret of OFA to the entire U.A. Citizen Clown Parade” on my bingo card for this week. it’s a bold strategy cotton let’s see if it pays off

SDLFKJSL

“NO, SERIOUSLY, HAVE YOU LOOKED AT HIM YOU GUYS. YOU THINK HE LIKES RUNNING AROUND DRESSED LIKE A RUSTED OIL DRUM?? HE DID THAT FOR YOU YOU UNGRATEFUL SLOBS”

so she is basically explaining the entire Deku Angst arc to them and explaining what a good and selfless protagonist Deku is, YES, PREACH

OMG IT’S THE GIGANTIC FOX LADY

not to insinuate anything, but what exactly were you doing standing out here with the hysterical mob, Gigantic Fox Lady? you’re better than that

-- KACCHAN SIGHTING!!

sdlkfjl. thanks for weighing in with that helpful and important observation. where have you been for the last five minutes. were you asleep. was it Jeanist’s speech

never mind, now he’s yelling at the civilians so I instantly forgive him

THE FUTURE NUMBER ONE HERO, EVERYONE. THANK YOU, THANK YOU. HE’LL BE HERE ALL WEEK

“anyway so I’m just going to end the chapter here” lmao seventeen pages truly do go by so fast. at least he didn’t try to force in a cliffhanger at the end this time. dare I say, growth

so I guess the civilians are either gonna have a Kamino and/or Fukuoka-esque moment where they remember how to be decent people and apologize to this poor young man, or else they’ll remain unpersuaded, and so Kacchan will have to knock a few of their heads around until they become more inclined to be reasonable. either option is fine by me lol

[fanatic-author]

Murder Is Not On The Agenda

Rating: T (swearing) Warnings: swearing Category: Gen Fandom: Boku No Hero Academia Relationships: Dabi & Shigaraki & Toga Language: English Words: 2,162 Chapters: 1/1

Summary: Three villains go on an ice cream run in the middle of the night and absolutely nothing goes wrong. Yeah, right.

Read it here on AO3!

“Tomura, I think I’m dying.” Toga moaned where she lay spread out on the couch.  

“Shut the fuck up.” he replied, not even bothering to look at her. He had the electric fan, and everyone else could suck it.

“Tomura.” Dabi whined from his spot on the floor.

“What.”

“I think I’m dying.”  

“Sucks.”

The fact of the matter was, it was nearly 30 degrees and almost 11 o clock at night, which meant it was  hot  with no sign of cooling off anytime soon. And with 7 people sharing a space, it was getting unbearable.

“Shiggy, give me the fan. Kurogiri tell Shiggy it’s my turn with the fan!”

“Eat my ass, bitch.”

Compress was fanning himself with his mask; trench coat, top hat, and even balaclava removed in the intense heat. Spinner was no better, elaborate stain costume stashed somewhere not on his body in favor of as little clothing as possible. When questioned about why a  reptile  which was typically cold blooded had to  cool off , they were met with double fingers and a grumbled “I’m human underneath the scales.”  

The one probably faring the worst of all of them was Twice. He refused to take off his mask, and as such was gently being prodded by Kurogiri to periodically suck on ice cubes. The heat didn’t seem to have much an effect on the warper. Perks of being a living cloud, one supposed.  

“Shiggy do somethiiiiiiiiing.” Toga continued whining, one hand fanning herself and the other laying listlessly off the couch.  

“Do something? You want me to do something!? I don’t control the weather Toga! I don’t control the thermostat, or the pressure systems, or the tilt of the earth this time of the year!” he shouted.

“But you can control the tilt the rest of the year?” Dabi quipped, still lying vulnerable on the floor.  

This vulnerability was immediately exploited by Tomura who launched himself across the room to body slam Dabi, a surprised and breathless “OOF” leaving him. The two of them began rolling around the floor, slapping and pinching the other, but they quickly fell apart in the overwhelming heat.  

“I think I would give my left nut for that Todoroki kid’s ice quirk right about now.” Spinner said from his spot near the window, raising many questions regarding reptiles and nuts no one wanted to ask.  

Dabi twitched but it was Toga who said “Man, I bet he can make ice cream whenever he wants!”  

“That sounds like a hassle.” replied Spinner.

“What?”

“Making ice cream. Way easier to go buy some.”  

“How?”  

Dabi, Tomura, and Spinner all simultaneously replied “Money can be exchanged for goods and services.” Compress pinched his nose. Twice groaned in overheating agony.  

“Maybe you should participate in our stimulating economy” Kurogiri said “and fetch the rest of us some ice cream.”

“You don’t even feel the heat.” retorted Tomura, but Toga and Dabi had already gotten to their feet, and compress was rifling through his wallet for what bills he had on hand.  

“Get me an ice cream, none of that popsicle crap.” He said, giving Tomura the cash.  

“Screw you.”

In the end it was only Tomura, Dabi, and Toga going because Twice was still too hot, Spinner argued he’d attract too much attention, and Compress was paying. Kurogiri made them walk because he was an ass, according to Tomura.  

“We would attract so much attention if we warped to the 7-11 in the middle of the night.” Dabi pointed out “Like, they would call All Might out of retirement just to beat our ass.”  

“I’d take him.” Tomura deadpanned.  

“If you saw All Might’s emaciated form, you’d piss your pants running.”  

It had been like this for the last fifteen minutes they’d spent walking in the muggy heat to nearest 24-hour convenience store, which when you were hiding from any and all levels of law enforcement, was not anywhere near where they lived. Whenever the conversation seemed to slow down, Toga interjected with just enough barb to get the argument rolling again.  

“Fuck, marry, kill: All Might, Endeavor, Hawks”  

“Kill all 3.” Tomura replied.  

Toga stuck out her tongue at him “You’re no fun. Dabi?”

“Kill Endeavor, fuck Hawks, marry All Might. He’d treat me right.”  

Toga swooned “Oh he would, wouldn’t he? Always coughing up blood...”  

Tomura murmured “freak” under his breath, with only a teaspoon of malice. The three of them entered 7-11, identities hidden from the cameras (and prone to panicking cashiers) under face masks.

“Cuz this isn’t suspicious as all hell” Dabi muttered under his breath “Spinner should have had to come.”  

The argument had been made that either spinner should have to come or Dabi should be allowed to stay, but Kurogiri insisted on adult supervision for the other 2, no matter Tomura was probably the oldest of the three of them, but he didn’t count because he was Tomura. Dabi had that kind of face that one would assume is older than it actually was, probably because of the horrific scar tissue.  

The three of them gathered around the cooler, bills in hand, staring down the various cool treats.  

“This is all gonna be melted by the time we get back anyway.” Toga pointed out.  

Tomura said “Well the rest of them should have thought of that before giving us their money. Just grab whatever you want.” He proceeded to do so, plucking ice cream cones and popsicles from their icy shelves. Dabi wandered over to the slushy machine.  

Toga grabbed a misshapen SpongeBob popsicle for herself, Tomura despite knowing it was a waste had grabbed three ice creams and one popsicle (for compress), Dabi was currently filling an extra-large slushy. None of the 3 paid particularly close attention to the overhead door bell jingling.  

They  did  however, begin paying attention at the obnoxious voices that had made their way inside.  

“Alright! Uraraka you are on candy duty, Kirishima! Retrieve the slushies! Midoriya, here is the ice cream list, and I shall get chips! Does everyone else have their lists? Reconvene here once you have gotten everything, or close alternatives if the first option is not available!”  

There were various sounds of assent and agreement, which were largely missed by the two villains, too busy shitting their pants.  

“What? How?” Toga whispered, already dropped to a crouch behind the cooler.  

“I don’t know! Shut up!” Tomura hissed back, crouched behind Toga., the various treats shoved in his pockets. He had no qualms using her as a meat shield if spotted.

“Where’s Dabi?”

“He went to the slushy machine.”  

They both peered around the cooler to look where Dabi had gone. Where’d he’d standing instead sat a lone, spilt, extra-large slushy.  

“Oh my god they killed Dabi.” Toga whispered.  

Tomura nodded in agreement “Well, let’s cut our losses and get out of here.”  

“Man, fuck you guys.”  

Both Tomura and Toga shrieked as Dabi came up behind them, and then immediately shushed the other. Unfortunately for the three villains hiding behind an ice cream cooler in a 7-11 in the middle of the night, stealth was not their forte. Quite frankly, not much was.  

A nearby voice, rapidly getting louder, asked “Did you guys hear that?”  

Neither of the three villains waited for their nemesis, one Midoriya Izuku aka the second coming of All Might himself to find them. Toga dashed to hide behind the shelves of snacks in the center of the store. Tomura and Dabi weighed their options, but the prospect of getting blown through a wall at Mach 3 had them quickly following.  

Toga stood crouched in the beef jerky aisle, with the sound of The Uglier Sonic only one aisle over.

“We. Need. To. Get. Out. Of. Here.” Tomura bit, out as quietly as possible.  

“I vote we use Toga as bait.”  

“ Hey!”  

Tomura shushed them both, all three of them listening to see if their conversation had attracted any unwanted attention.  

“... and 3 bags of sour cream and onion, one of ketchup, and one of... Excuse me, Midoriya? Do you happen to know of the flavor “Chungus?” Kaminari requested a big bag of... why are you laughing?”  

Dabi looked like he was going to have a stroke trying to contain his laughter.  

“I love those stupid kids.” he said.  

“Yeah, that’s why we’re trying to kill them.” Toga agreed.  

Dabi looked to Tomura “So what’s the plan, boss? Light, and run?”  

He shook his head “No, no way. I’m not dealing with these snot-nosed brats today. I just want to go home, and bitch about the heat some more. Murder was not, and is still not, on the agenda.”  

Dabi carefully extinguished the blue flame in his hand “Ok, but we still need a way out.”  

“Alright, boy wonder is at the ice cream cooler, Dwayne Johnson is at the slushy machine, Glinda is grabbing candy 3 aisles over, and we’re less than 2 feet from a speeding bullet. Anything in our way between us and the door?”  

“No.” Dabi answered, right as Toga said “Yes.”  

“What?”  

Wordlessly she pointed, and there standing just outside the door was the worst one yet. Their homeroom teacher. Of course the kids couldn’t just go anywhere they liked off campus in the middle of the night, they had to be accompanied. He was probably making sure no one got in the store to hurt them.  

“If this was an assassination attempt, we’d be killing it right now.” Dabi said.  

Toga said “Ha. Pun.”  

Tomura wanted to pull his hair out “We’re never this successful when we’re actually trying, what gives?”  

The three of them put their heads together.  

“Think they’ll give me a nicer cell if I sell you two out?” Dabi had a hand on his chin in contemplation.

Tomura hit him.  

“I think stabbing is a viable solution.”

“I think one or more heroes is going to be scraping you off their knuckles if you try.”

“What if we got you to a wall? Make us a hole, then make a run for it?”  

Tomura nodded “I could do it.”  

The three of them began creeping towards the far end of the aisle, closest to an outer wall, when a large yelp, and a crashing sound made the three of them jump. Toga actually startled so hard she hit the shelf behind her, making a frankly impressive amount of noise considering. Thankfully it was drowned out by the sounds of alarm coming from the other occupants of the store.  

“Ow...”  

“Kirishima! are you alright?”  

“Yeah, I slipped in some...”  

“I’m coming!”  

Then there was the familiar sound of engines revving, and then a  very  impressive crashing sound, followed by two pained cries this time.  

“Dude, why?” one groaned.  

“I apologize, I did not see the slushy on the ground.” The other moaned.  

The front door bell chimed rather aggressively as the front door slammed open, a very menacing aura entering that had each person in that store reconsidering every decision that brought them there in that moment.  

“What. Is. Going. On. Here?” A gruff voice asked, belonging none other than to one pissed off Eraserhead, a voice every villain in the league was familiar with by this point. It usually precluded getting your ass kicked.

All the students gathered around their fallen friends and began clamoring to explain themselves at once, voices shouting and pointing out facts and telling wildly outlandish tales of sabotage slushies on the ground. The volume of the group rose and rose as each member tried to talk over the other.  

“Well that was easy. See ya, suckers.” Dabi said, dashing from his point of cover and out the door.  

Toga quickly followed, and Tomura hesitated but as the group remained quite thoroughly distracted, he soon followed as well. No one inside noticed the three villains taking off in to the night.  

“Holy shit!” Toga laughed outrageously, now several blocks from the convenience store, and lavishing in her nearly lost freedom. She jumped off the sidewalk, running around with her arms spread in malicious joy.  

“Just so you guys know, I wouldn’t have actually sold you out for a better cell. Just so we’re clear.”  

“Shut up while you’re ahead, Dabi”

Toga howled in joy “and I didn’t even have to pay for my ice cream!” She pulled out her SpongeBob popsicle, ripping the wrapper off to expose the misshapen face that was supposedly a cartoon character. She plopped it in her mouth with a satisfied hum.  

“Oh my god.” Tomura stuck his own hands in his pockets, pulling out the treats he’d shoved in there when this all began.  

“Oh, hell yeah!” Dabi plucked one of the packaged ice cream cones from his hand. Tomura didn’t even fight him for it, ripping open his own ice cream treat and digging in.  

He couldn’t help chuckling “Those heroes helped us rob a convenience store.”  

Dabi nodded “This is the best day of my life.”  

[makeste]

BnHA 6th Popularity Poll Reaction Post - Risky Spoiler-Dodging Edition

hey guys, so seeing as the results from the 6th popularity poll were leaked today, I figured I would do a separate reaction + analysis post this year, rather than piling it in as an extra on top of the chapter reaction post tomorrow. I figure this makes more sense anyway, since they’re really two completely different things. also this way I can write as much as I want lol.

also, just fyi, I am still completely unspoiled for chapter 293. and probably the smart thing to do to keep it that way would be to log off tumblr and hold off posting this until tomorrow, but I apparently have no impulse control today so oh well. anyway, so I’m hoping you guys will keep this spoiler-free if you don’t mind! as always, I would prefer to just jump right in completely unaware tomorrow like Troy returning to the study room with the pizza boxes lol.

okay so this first part is just going to be my predictions. fyi I am writing this part on Wednesday night, and then I’ll add on the results part on Thursday or Friday (ETA: Thursday, apparently, since I am impatient.)

okay so first of all, just as a refresher, this poll was open to Japanese voters from Aug 3 to Sep 30. meaning chapters 279 through 285. meanwhile last year’s poll took place around the tail end of the MVA arc. so between then and now we had Heroes Rising, the Endeavor Agency arc, and the War arc up to the part where the 1-A kids took on Gigantomachia in Gunga, and started battling Tomura in Jakku. so technically only a couple of arcs, but a LOT of stuff going down in them. oh and season 4 of the anime as well

so! firstly, I predict that my truculent africanized honeybee son will hold on to his crown at #1, coming off a year in which he did some internship-boosted soul searching, borrowed OFA in movie canon, and finished out the voting period as the my-body-moved-on-its-own character development MVP. like CALL ME CRAZY lol, but I’m pretty sure his title is safe. and then after him will be Deku and Shouto as usual

Aizawa should hopefully also have a strong showing because the dude had a banner fucking year. reunited with his old dead friend, took on Tomura with his hopelessly inept hero pals, and then chopped his fucking leg off. he had better be in the top 10. his fucking leg died for this, idk what else he has to do

Endeavor also stands a decent chance of doing well given the internship arc and the final episode of season 4. which I’m sure will go down just swimmingly if that does happen lmao. especially if he somehow manages to rank higher than...

Dabi, which I don’t think he will btw, but you never know. anyways though, but I’m thinking Dabi’s going to have a stronger showing than in past years (in the last poll he only got 367 votes and was ranked 19th). mostly because of his fight in the Gunga mansion, and his cheekily censored name reveal to...

Hawks, who is also going to rank pretty high here, I think. might be he loses some points for killing off Twice, but his back was basically to the wall there. and he has always been very popular, and I think season 4 will also give him a boost, along with his heavy involvement in the first half of the War arc

Tomura was already in 6th place last year and I think he cracks the top 5 this year. he’s gotten exponentially more popular since the MVA arc, and got a boost in the last poll even though his flashback had only just barely happened, and he hadn’t finished Awakening yet and all that stuff. anyway, so he’s only gotten cooler and more tragic since then so I think he makes a big play here

Kirishima, Momo, Tokoyami, and Mina should also hopefully do well, since the poll opened right in the middle of all that Gigantomachia action, and Toko had just got done being an absolute badass and protecting his birb dad. I don’t think he’ll quite make it to the top ten, but he should

and last but not least, I’m hoping that Mirko will come out and take the polls by storm, although I have no clue how popular she is in Japan lol. she’s clearly Horikoshi’s favorite though. she SHOULD be everyone’s favorite, but I mean, we’ll see how it goes

anyway that’s it as far as predictions! and so now, through the magic of writing stuff at different times, we will fast-forward to the part where we actually find out the results!

OH MY GOD YES, STEAMPUNK KHLKSLLKL. HERE FOR IT. JOLLY GOOD SHOW. 5 STARS

Kacchan looks SO COCKY and SO HAPPY and SO ADORABLE, YES I SAID IT. he is adorable as FUCK. I don’t quite know what it is about this particular Kacchan that just screams “LOOK HOW FUCKING CUTE MY STUPID, LOUD SON IS WITH HIS BIZARRE WINDOWPANE-LOOKING CONVERTIBLE SUNGLASS GOGGLES and his POORLY TIED CRAVAT”, but I think it’s because he looks like if a Digimon character and a FMA character had a baby

anyway, so it looks like most of the people present here are more or less who we expected to see. except that I can’t tell for sure if that’s Dabi or Shindou, and if it’s Shindou I’m going to punch somebody in the face so you will have to excuse me

Iida wearing a TRENCHCOAT and a TOP HAT with ENGINE EXHAUST GOGGLE ACCENTS is my new favorite Iida of all time. take note how there is no possible way he can wear those goggles with them sitting on top of his hat like that. plus he’s already got glasses on. these are just purely for aesthetic and IF THAT AIN’T JUST THE STEAMPUNK WAY

Deku out here speaking softly and carrying a lead pipe. Kacchan you best look out. seems like he’s done watching you take first place year after year while he languishes in the number two spot. your only hope is that he trips while attacking you because his boots are unbuckled

Shouto’s standing over there with the rest of the non-first-and-second-place characters, but what are the odds his results are actually within spitting distance of Deku’s same as always. anyway he doesn’t mind, though. also his outfit is by far the most sensible one here, but if you look closely he’s got some sort of fire extinguisher/jet pack thing strapped to his back that’s got a control switch on his belt. Shouto are you jetpacking or putting out fires

Kirishima out here all “I’m not sure what steampunk is so I’m just going to take off my shirt and pose”

AIZAWA WITH THE EYEPATCH SKLKSDLKFJLSKJLDFKJSLDFFJLDKSJFL:KS. SIR. SIR. also, lowkey furious that Horikoshi refuses to show us the automail leg that he is clearly sporting here but which we just can’t see, SHOUTO MOVE GODDAMMIT

Endeavor has TWO fire extinguisher-slash-jetpacks. THE BETTER TO... WHATEVER. look at you here in the top ten again. you really live for that controversy

HAWKS OUT HERE WITH HIS STEAMPUNK BEATS BY DRE AND HIS WEARING A RING ON EVERY FINGER. nice to see you’ve still got your wings there, kiddo. then again Deku still has both of his arms too so who even knows what is going on

BUT SERIOUSLY THOUGH, IS THIS DABI OR SHINDOU. as if I don’t know the truth deep down in my heart. y’all I am gonna flip lmao. it’s not that I dislike Shindou, strictly speaking. but just... I can’t explain what it is, but if you put him and AFO next to each other and told me “you can only punch one”, I would be having a serious crisis. just, THIS FUCKING GUY, idek. STOP SMILING

Tomura looks like he just wandered onto the set here by mistake and has no idea where he is or what is going on. it’s because you’re wearing a bigass severed hand that’s blocking your entire view, Tomura. just take the hand off your face my sweet murder dumpling

anyway! so I managed to also find a link to the full poll results while somehow managing to avoid spoilers, and then I wanted to compare the results to last year’s poll, and so I made... this

hopefully you can all see this. if you’re on desktop you might be screwed, but on mobile you should be able to click and enlarge it. I mean, assuming you actually give a fuck about boring poll analysis spreadsheets lmao

anyway, so there were actually 13k fewer votes cast this year which is a bit of a surprise. is the series not still growing in popularity? do people apparently have better things to do during their quarantine lol

anyways but despite this, and despite getting 8k fewer votes overall, Kacchan still managed almost twice as many as his closest competitor. well fought, Deku. please put down that pipe

I somehow always underestimate the power of ship popularity to influence these things. but for example, it looks like Present Mic got that Vigilantes Trio bump. ride that wave for all it’s worth my man! hell, you got me on board

Iida fucking Tenya somehow got some sort of POWER BOOST out of NOWHERE which I can’t explain at all lmao, but I’m here for it. NOT BAD FOR AN OLD MAN

Sero managed to get the exact same number of votes in both 2019 and 2020. clearly the most loyal fans in the business

Mirko being all the way down at #20 is, of course, a travesty, and I hereby nominate her to be the one to punch Shindou in the face

ngl though, the lack of a single female character in the top ten hurts just a bit. it’s not overly surprising, but still. the worst part of it is that even if you kicked Shindou to the curb and moved everyone else up one slot, it would still be all dudes since Mic beat out Momo by a margin of a little more than a hundred votes. hard to stay mad at Mic for too long, though. ah well

Tomura actually lost a bunch of votes which is a genuine surprise to me. I know the villain standom isn’t as dominant in Japan as it is in Western fandom, but still. you can go ahead and punch Shindou too I guess

Tokoyami lowkey doubled his vote count over the past year while hiding down there at #18. he is slowly becoming more powerful. biding his time

anyway so I think that’s it! I mean not really, but I’m getting kind of tired lol. so just, you know, insert the usual gripes at Overhaul’s ranking here, although we can be happy about Magne making her way onto the list (r.i.p.), and Mineta and AFO taking a very satisfying slide down (all the way out, in AFO’s case; good riddance you bum). Hadou also got a huge boost which is awesome. Mustard’s persistent ownership of the #36 spot will forever remain a mystery to me, but oh well

anyways, this was fun. and I really do feel like everyone is looking away on purpose so that when Deku brains Kacchan with that pipe in about two seconds from now, there will be no witnesses, oh my fucking god