#i wanted to draw something drew and robbie related

[bluvlet]

i think he’s buried me somewhere. dad, please, please get me out.

[acsversace-news]

Judith Light just picked up her third consecutive Emmy nomination, this time for her heartbreaking work as Marilyn Miglin on the FX limited series “The Assassination of Gianni Versace.” The actress now has four prime-time nominations in her career, including two for playing Shelly Pfefferman on “Transparent” and another for guest starring on “Ugly Betty.”

Light recently chatted with Gold Derby contributing writer Tony Ruiz about filming “The Assassination of Gianni Versace” the day after last year’s Emmys, the importance of the series and how she feels about her life at this stage in her career. Watch the exclusive video chat above and read the complete interview transcript below.

Gold Derby: Judith Light, congratulations on your Emmy nomination. You played Marilyn Miglin in “The Assassination of Gianni Versace.” First of all, it would seem to me that you and Ryan Murphy working together would be kind of a no-brainer and yet this is the first time you two have worked together. How did this come to you?

Judith Light: First of all, thank you for the congratulations. I really appreciate it. I’m so honored. This is a kind of television spectrum that there are so many people in and I’m so honored to be nominated with all of these incredible artists, so it’s very special for me this year. I did a play in New York on Broadway called “Other Desert Cities” and it was written by this extraordinary writer, Jon Robin Baitz, and it was directed by this other extraordinary person, Joe Mantello. Robbie wrote to me, I think it was on a Friday night, he said, “Just so you know, I’m working with these amazing people, Ryan Murphy, Brad Simpson, Nina Jacobson, and their team is amazing and I want you to know them. I think a script may be coming to you.” And I was like, “Okay.” And he said, essentially, “I think you should do it.” And I was like, “Okay, I’m gonna listen to everything you say.” And I said, “My schedule in September is crazy,” ‘cause that’s when they were shooting it. The script did indeed come and it was indeed extraordinary and Tom Rob Smith is a wordsmith. Illustrious, I’d have to say, is the word that I would use to describe him and his writing. Then it all unfolded from there and the one thing that was really standing in the way that is the thing that I really love about this story, is that the schedule was completely full and the one thing that I had that I could not change was on the day that they needed me to be in Los Angeles to start doing the hair, the makeup and the wardrobe fittings. I said, “If anybody on the planet will understand this, it’s Ryan Murphy.” I had to be in Washington to open the AIDS conference for the Elizabeth Taylor AIDS Foundation, and I said, “I said I would be there. I have to be there.” They said, “Of course. Just take the plane that night,” and I did, and then I did all the rest of the work the next day, but it took somebody like Ryan Murphy to really understand that. I’m sure other people would as well but I love that about him. That was very special for me.

GD: You get this script for “A Random Killing,” which was the third episode, and what do you look at first? Do you just look at your part? Do you read the whole script front to back? What is it you look for in your character?

JL: The whole script from front to back. I need to know what frame I’m working in. I need to know what the context is. I need to know how I fit into that, because this is not a solitary affair, working in our business. This is about teams, which is what I love about it so much, so I always look in a character for a character’s flaws, the things that pain them, the stuff that’s under the surface that you don’t see, that you have to really look for, and how to get into that. And I thought that what Tom Rob Smith did, and the specificity with which he related, that was the thing that really took me and pulled me into it. So there were things that are in the show that Gwyneth Horder-Payton, who was the director, who was amazing, there’s this one moment where Marilyn is clicking her nails on a countertop and that’s what you see. That indicates so much about the character. That was written in the stage directions. So that tells you the kind of character that you’re dealing with and how much the things that were happening with her were imploding inside of her. And there’s that one moment where she does explode and you see all the cracks happen. So the way that it was structured and created, those were the things that really drew me in. And I love Mike Farrell, and I think he is remarkable to work with, so there was also that piece of it.

GD: One of the things that struck me was the relationship between you and Mike Farrell, who plays your husband, Lee. You only have one episode to convey this deep relationship and marriage and really just a few scenes between Lee and Marilyn. What did you two talk about to build that relationship, or was it just a natural chemistry between the two of you?

JL: There was a real naturalness to the whole endeavor. We had to practice dancing together and so when you do something like that, all of a sudden things come together because you’re doing something physically together and you’re in your body. You’re in your feeling. You’re in your emotion, so I think that really helped and there’s this one moment where I’m introducing him where he’s getting this honor, and it was just very natural the way we were working together so there wasn’t anything that was spoken or structured. We just knew that we were simpatico on a lot of levels.

GD: As an actor, is it more difficult to play a real person or does that even enter your mind at all?

JL: That’s a really good question. It’s difficult to play a real person, because you don’t want to caricature anyone, and that’s why I didn’t look at anything that Marilyn had been involved in. I know she’s been on home shopping networks and QVC and stuff like that, but I really wanted to stay away from all of that, because of the story and the painful nature of the story. I really felt that I wanted to be deferential to her and this great loss of this great love of her life, and to do it justice and to also be responsible and to not create a caricature is always a challenge.

GD: The episode, “A Random Killing,” is sort of bookended by these scenes of you really looking directly into the camera, starting with that first scene where Lee’s body is discovered and you just say, “I knew it.” So when you’re playing a scene like that, do you have an intention of what you want the audience to take from it or do you like it to be a bit more ambivalent for the audience?

JL: Again, I go back to the, “I’m playing a real person.” In a way that Gwyneth directed me was to not give anything away, is to allow you as the audience to really take what you believe she is saying from that. There are a lot of things that led up to that that would lead you to believe that over time she knew what was happening, lived in denial, perhaps. We do have that scene on the stairs where Lee says to Marilyn, “Please don’t go.” And she says, “Why?” So she could have sense that she knew he was saying to her, “Something’s gonna happen, please don’t go.” So there are a lot of complications and layers, which is what I love, and what I think what great writing is and great storytelling.

GD: Correct me if I’m wrong, I read or heard this somewhere, but I heard that the scene where Marilyn finally breaks down and talks about her life with Lee and their marriage and his death, that you filmed that scene shortly after last year’s Emmys. Is that true?

JL: The next day.

GD: Really?

JL: The next morning. I had to get back to New York so I only had a couple of days to be here in L.A. after the Emmys, so the Emmys were on Sunday night. They just couldn’t schedule it any other way and sometimes you’re locked into things on locations, as people know, and you can’t change them. So yeah, that’s what we did. And I said, “Well maybe not early in the morning,” and I think maybe I had to get up at five. You just do what you have to do. I like to say that I like to live my life not doing what I want, but what I think works. When you do things that work for other people and yourself, it ends up working all the way around and so I just feel very strongly about that. I used to go through my life all the time saying, “I want this and I want that. Why don’t I have that?” I’ve been talking about this recently a lot because I’ve been thinking about it a lot. There’s nothing to get in life. It’s only what you give. Just keep giving. Just do that and all of a sudden, things happen in ways that are quite remarkable, like my getting nominated. I don’t think one ties to the other, necessarily, but there’s a way in which I think life, for me, works in a much more powerful, kinder, gentler way.

GD: When you look back at your career, one of the hallmarks of your career has been your ability to go back and forth between film to television to stage. What draws you to a character or to an experience?

JL: Do they speak to me in a way that I feel that I can do something with that character to be of service, to give an eyeball into this particular person’s life, this person’s psychological trappings? What draws them? What is important to them? And when I find that, then I feel that I can connect with that character and do something with that character. It’s not about a career move or what’s a good idea or any of that stuff. It’s about, how do I connect with that human being and can I translate that feeling, that emotion, the life of that person? Can I bring that to fruition so that people will be able to take it in? And it will be illuminating for them in some way just as I hope it will be illuminating for myself.

GD: It’s interesting too because one of the themes of this series is not just about this particular murder or this particular killer, but it’s really about the failure on the part of investigators, in part because these killings involved predominantly gay men. And you’ve been such an ally to the LGBTQ community for so many years. How do you think this series resonates in the political and social climate of 2018?

JL: I think it’s a history lesson. I think it’s a reminder that if we don’t pay attention to what has gone before, if we do not learn from our history we are doomed to repeat it. I would have to say, because I’ve been an advocate for the LGBTQ community for such a long time, that there is still a great deal of homophobia in this country and around the world. When you see something like this and you point at the things that you’re pointing at about this investigation and what happened, I think this is a culturally important moment and a culturally essential conversation to be having. That’s one of things that I really respect and admire about Ryan is he takes these stories to show exactly what happened and how, in fact, this story might have had a very different ending if we related differently as human beings, to other people, and who they are and the way they are and how they are in their lives, and if this young man had been nurtured, if he had walked into a world that held him with open arms and said, “It’s fine that you’re gay. We love everything about you,” this might’ve had a very different ending and this would’ve been a very different story. That’s the sorrow, to me, about this, and what is so important to me about showing this and putting it on television, and hail to FX and Fox for doing it, because it takes a lot to present this to the public, and the public, they came in droves to see this, and that’s what I think has been the tremendous success of this. 18 Emmy nominations tells you a lot, not just about the artistry but about the compelling nature of this story.

GD: We are currently in this era of limited series where you get to tell these types of stories. Is this a format that you’d like to revisit? Tell us what’s next for you.

JL: Well, I’m leaving in a few days and going back to New York to shoot a film, so there’s that, and I just came back from Atlanta. I finished shooting a recurring part on a series for Facebook Watch called “Queen America,” with Catherine Zeta-Jones. So there is that and then there will be a couple of other things that will be coming down the pipe that I can’t really talk about right now, but there are definitely other things and I’m doing a lot of readings of plays and looking to find my way back to doing something in the theater again. Finding my way to being of real service in the work that I do and in the life that I live. There are things that really matter to me about what’s happening in the LGBTQ community, particularly in the trans community right now. I think there’s such great work being done, of course the great work that we have done on “Transparent” and now that Ryan is doing on “Pose.” So those are the kinds of things that I’m looking at and seeing and how to use the art and the artists that I get to work with to actually tell stories that are powerful and impactful.

GD: Well Judith Light, congratulations again on the Emmy nomination and just a magnificent performance. Thank you so much and best of luck at the Emmys this year.

JL: Thank you, I’m really happy to talk to you. Take good care.

[nrcssasblck-blog]

» BASICS

FULL NAME: Narcissa Walburga Black NICKNAME(S): Cissa, Cissy, Princess AGE: Twenty-five DATE OF BIRTH: August 8th, 1957 GENDER: Cis-female PRONOUNS: She / Her NATIONALITY: British ETHNICITY: Caucasian SEXUALITY: Heteroflexible

» APPEARANCE

FACE CLAIM: Margot Robbie HEIGHT: 5′7 BUILD: Slim, slender DOMINANT HAND: Right EYE COLOR: Blue HAIR COLOR: Blonde BIRTHMARKS/SCARS: Freckles atop her shoulders, a small mole on her left collarbone.

» PERSONALITY

ZODIAC: Leo MBTI TYPE: ENFP TEMPERAMENT: Choleric MORAL ALIGNMENT: Chaotic Neutral ARCHETYPE(S): Tastemaker, Royal ELEMENT: Fire HOUSE: Slytherin; ambitious and cunning, shrewd but devious WAND: 12¾", Elm & dragon heartstring, reasonably supple PATRONUS: Lioness; individualistic and self-aware, blunt and protective AMORENTIA: Freshly baked pastries, crisp leather, cherry wine, pressed white roses in the pages of an old book, cigar smoke and whiskey +/- TRAITS: tbd

» MORE INFORMATION

RESIDENCE: Malfoy Manor OCCUPATION: Socialite SIGNIFICANT OTHER(S): Lucius — tbd; Sirius — tbd; Amos — tbd; Hestia — tbd; Crouch — tbd; FAMILY: Cygnus — tbd; Druella — tbd; Andromeda — tbd; Bellatrix (npc) — tbd; 

» TIMELINE

1958: Born 1969: First year at Hogwarts 1976: Last year at Hogwarts TBD:

» HEADCANONS/BIO

ONE OF A KIND — Her sisters have always been her favorite people and she puts her family—her blood—above all else. She’s strong-willed, with a mile-long list of her own beliefs and affirmations, but she knows better than to share her ideals for a bat of her lashes and a coy smile have always gotten her much farther in life. But her mind—her thoughts, her goals, her dreams—have always been her own, no one else’s, not to be shared or judged or gawked at. They can have her words, but only what she’s willing to divulge and the rest belongs to her. 

PRIMADONNA — Her youth was spent donned in the finest clothes, littered with the most expensive things, dazzling with luxury and sophistication. To say she was spoiled would be a grave understatement for there was nothing in the world forbidden to Narcissa, and the word no was never once uttered in her direction. Can I have more? Yes. Will you buy me this? Yes. Am I the prettiest? Yes. So sweet, so tempting. So innocent, so captivating. So manipulative, so charming. She had the world wrapped around her finger, pulling it tighter and tighter whenever she pleased. She was raised a princess, given opportunities any other girl would have killed for. She grew into a lover of all things beautiful: clothes, food, people; became a master of all things elegant: Parisian travel, fine wine, satin sheets. And she did it all with a natural, wind-whipped tousle to her blonde curls, perfectly lined lips and a smile that could have surely burned Rome to the ground. The spitting image of Druella, all doe-eyed blues and champagne curls, she coasted through life on her long, sun-kissed locks and her naive smile, always drawing people near only to have them lay down at her feet. A lover of  all things posh, she keeps up with the latest trends in fashion which helps her create a quite envious sense of style. And to this day she’s Narcissa, the apple of her mother’s eye and the princess her father had always wanted; perfect in every sense of the word.

WORLD TRAVELER — At a young age, she developed quite the passion for languages, mainly those considered the languages of love: French, Italian, Spanish. She’s only mastered French, able to speak, read and write in the tongue, but her Italian is still spotty. She’s unable to read or write it, but can speak it beautifully. She’s been to each country as well, traveling to Paris for the first time at the tender age of eight where she fell madly in love with the city. And to this day, she still travels there often, begging Lucius to go along with her or even sneaking away every now and then when she needs a fresh breath of that Parisian air. Next to a quiet night at home beside her husband, Paris is her favorite place on Earth.

TOUJOURS PUR — Always pure; a mantra, a belief system, a way of life. Her family’s motto, one whispered after bedtime stories, purred among adults behind closed doors, slithered along the halls of Hogwarts. Such a thing, such a strict notion draws a line in the sand in the pretty head of a young girl, tells her who to associate with and who to avoid, lets her know who’s relevant and who isn’t, whose life matters and whose is worthless. Theirs—hers—was of the utmost relevance, their blood pure through and through, revered, worshipped as they are The Most Ancient and Noble House of Black. Royalty, and she a legacy, a descendant of the grandest heritage. Such a motto put her in certain social circles, gave her friends of similar backgrounds, put her in the crosshairs of boys whose families came of the same noble background. And all her life she’s been told the importance of her blood and in turn the inferiority of others’. It’s something that has been drilled into her mind since she was a child, so it was only natural for it to affect her own beliefs, her own ideas about life. Two words, both seemingly unimportant when separated, and when brought together they created an entire lifestyle, but she has never been too vocal about her prejudices mostly because she wouldn’t consider them prejudices. She wants no harm brought to those of mixed families, wishes no ill will upon mudbloods, but it is of her opinion that blood should be toujours pur.

ENCHANTRESS — In her youth, she enjoyed toying with the numerous men vying for her affection, always flirting her way through her social circle, not really looking for love but enjoying the occasional dalliance with a cute boy, that is, until she met Lucius though she did make him work for it. She’s never been a hopeless romantic, preferring attention-seeking dramatics and all-consuming passion over standard and boring and wholly ordinary trysts. She wants to be adored, and despite her current icy exterior today, she still demands a certain level of affection and this will never change for her ego was far too inflated as a young girl.

IRREPLACEABLE — She isn’t terribly sentimental save for just a few things. A golden ring in the shape of a slithering snake gifted to her by Lucius upon their first anniversary. It has made a home on the middle finger of her right hand and she hasn’t taken it off since the day he gave it to her. A silver sweeping necklace with a pink stone pendant cut in half of which the other half belongs to Andromeda. It is one of, if not the most precious thing she owns, given to her by her sister on her eleventh birthday, and she hadn’t taken it off since. But since her betrayal and subsequent shunning, it now remains in the jewelry box atop her vanity for safekeeping and she has never been able to part with it.

LIKES & DISLIKES — Silk dresses, fur coats, diamonds, fresh morning snow, pink champagne, stilettos, summer thunderstorms, french croissants, white roses, lace lingerie, menthol cigarettes, Chanel perfume and bubble baths are just a few of Narcissa’s favorite things. She detests mediocrity, liars, muggles, traitors, dark chocolate, white wine, waking up early, sleeping on anything but satin sheets, spending extended amounts of time outdoors and mudbloods.

TRUE LOVE — Her wedding was a grand affair, something out of a muggle magazine, a ten-page spread of glitter and glitz and glamour. Her dress was designer, fitting her like a glove. Her ring was enormous, the envy of every one of her friends. And her man was more handsome than any other. It was perfect; he was perfect, and though she’d be loathe to admit it to anyone but herself, she knew from the moment they’d first kissed that he would be her last. Though deeply in love, marrying a Malfoy came with certain expectations, numerous advantages and tremendous hardships. But in true Narcissa fashion, she navigated such uncharted waters with the poise and grace only a Black could have, taking on the merger of two noble families with the decorum of a princess turned serpentine queen. And oh, how easily she slid into this life, that of wife. Half trophy, half snake, she wore the title of Malfoy with pride, a badge of gory honor upon her chest. And though Black still coursed through her veins, she adapted far better than expected. She slithered her way around Lucius, holding the forbidden fruit in the palm of her hand, but it had been her who accepted the offer of intertwining not just their lives, but their souls, too. Equals in more ways than one, respectful in all aspects of their love—a romance she would have died for, killed for. A passionate, all-consuming kind of love that stops your breath and cinches your heart. No longer a girl, but a woman as strong-willed as the day she drew her first breath, a woman in love with a beast of man, but perhaps she’s become a beast, too.

DARK LORD — She’s never bore the dark mark, never lived to serve the evil deity that calls himself Voldemort—the Dark Lord, as Lucius calls him—and it isn’t because she doesn’t believe in the same ideals. She’s always been a purist at heart, truly believing crossing blood was a disgusting venture, abhorrent in every sense of the word, and it is this very reason she no longer speaks to Andromeda. It is such a strong belief that she’s cut off her own sister, tore flesh from flesh and renounced all relation to someone she’d idolized all her childhood. Her husband believes in these ideals so much that he’s willing to put himself in danger just to appease whom Narcissa would consider a madman with an even more demented band of cultish followers. And she’d have been a fool not to support Lucius. He’s of good social standing, handsome—a good jawline; he’ll pass that onto their sons someday—and most importantly, he adored her, and she him. But each time Lucius leaves the house, she’s terrified of what will happen, of what’s to come. And if they were to bring a child into this world, she has no idea if it would even be safe. What was supposed to be a happy and fruitful decision to bring life into the world has instead come to a screeching halt and part of her resents Lucius for prioritizing the rhetoric of a maniac over her, for doing the bidding of a psychopath. The ideals are what matter, she thinks. Not the bloodshed.

I WANT—I NEED YOU TO LIVE — As the years have passed, she’s aged with elegance, privilege still radiating from her every step, magnified tenfold with a charming flip to her curls coupled with that sweet aphroditic smile. She met, fell in love with and married the perfect boy, though as she stares at him from across the dining room table, she’d consider him a man now. Her life is a dream, save for the nights Lucius comes home beaten to a bloody pulp, ribs cracked, lips swollen. But what’s worse are the nights he doesn’t come home at all. Those are the nights she paces back and forth in the living room sipping wine and smoking one cigarette after the other, panic overwhelming all her senses. She simply cannot condone the extremism, the senseless violence and calamities this association to the Death Eaters brings. It bleeds into her daily life, takes over her every waking thought and the idea of this continuing is unbearable.

PRINCESS vs. QUEEN

I. “Primadonna girl, yeah, all I ever wanted was the world.” She floated through young adulthood like a beautiful, jasmine-scented mirage, a fever dream of pink mist and long golden curls.  Those who knew her loved her, and she would have accepted nothing less than your devotion. She surrounded herself with like-minded individuals—like-blooded—and only chose the best of friends to call her own. Adored by all, but understood by none and yet envied by everyone. Men wanted her, most of whom she indulged but only just, stringing them along and thinking very little of them. Girls wanted to be her, most of whom she paid no attention to, never really deeming their lives worth much or any of them worthy of her precious attention. A princess in all aspects. A radiant reminder of the perfection that went hand in hand with being a Black. An ethereal, utterly irresistible creature who knew just how to get what she wanted.

II. “I wish I were a girl again, half-savage and hardy, and free.” Melancholy, the air is thick with it. It hangs over them, a looming presence, a terrible reminder of another war brewing, and she can feel it in her bones—the death, the destruction. By her husband’s hands, by her own if anything were to happen to him. Lips normally curved into a knowing smile, as if she had a salacious secret on the tip of her tongue have now fallen into a sullen, straight line. Eyes usually alight with the possibilities of tomorrow, adventure just around the corner have now hardened, no longer filled with joy, only anguish and darkened by sorrow. The high walls encasing her heart have frozen solid, turned cheeks so rosy into icy alabaster and she fears things will never be the same.

LITTLE KNOWN FACTS

01. Bellatrix has called her Cissy for as long as she can remember. 02. She never really wanted to go to Hogwarts, always harboring dreams of venturing to Beauxbatons instead mostly because of her love of France. 03. Loves the color pink. 04. Sirius was her favorite cousin when she was younger and his betrayal hit her hard, perhaps even more so than Andromeda’s. 05. She’s her parents favorite, still relishing in this fact to this day. 06. Her boggart is quite traumatizing and is the theme of most of her nightmares; her family’s lifeless bodies staring up at her, Lucius included and there is nothing she could do to stop it, nothing she could do to save them. 07. Began dating Lucius in her final year at Hogwarts; they were married a few years later. 08. On her 11th birthday, Andromeda gifted her a silver necklace with a pink stone cut in half. She wore it until the day her sister betrayed their family. 09. Enjoys old black and white muggle films; Casablanca is her favorite, but she doesn’t share such an obsession as it would hurt her carefully constructed reputation to enjoy something so frivolous and human. 10. She’s scared to start a family because of all the dangers surrounding her and her loved ones as of late, but often dreams of giving Lucius a son though she’d secretly hope for a daughter to call her own. 11. Strengths: creative, passionate, generous, alluring. 12. Weaknesses: arrogant, stubborn, selfish, narcissistic.01 Bellatrix has called her Cissy for as long as she can remember; Lucius picked up on the nickname as well and uses it often. 

[imrobert-clarington]

                                                 Black Parade 

Robbie took a deep breath as he straightened the new pin on his uniform, signifying his promotion to Sergeant. At just 22 years old, the promotion had come as a shock to him, though to everyone else, it had just made sense. His dedication to the military, his natural leadership, and his good-hearted personality, it was a no-brainer. 

Beneath the smiles and small waves that he sent his brothers in arms, it was doing everything he could to choke back the nerves coursing through his body. With this promotion came a small team of soldiers that would become his charge, who would look up to him, take his orders as he looked over his day to day. He hoped that this small taste of leadership would some day lead him to enroll in Officer Candidate School to some day raise through the ranks to become a General, as his father had.

Stepping out of the gates of the airport terminal, he hiked his bag over his shoulder and started heading to the designated meeting spot outlined in his instructions. He stopped in his tracks as he saw a young boy struggling with bag, trying desperately to get it closed to reduce the total number of people who would see his embarrassing moment. By the insignia on his shoulder and the unmistakable nerves on his face, he couldn’t have been more than 19, fresh out of basic training. Robbie chuckled softly as he crossed over to him and knelt down in front of him. “Losing your first battle, I take it?” he teased gently, reaching forward to hold the lapels close so the other boy could get the zipper around it. 

The boy glanced up at him, trying to mask his nerves immediately with a scowl, until his eyes landed on the small pin on Robbie’s chest, causing his face to fall. He let out a strained chuckled and nodded. “Y-yes sir, it looks like it,” he choked out in a shaky breath. 

Robbie’s eyes softened, his head shaking with a small smile. “At ease, kid, there’s no need for the formalities just yet.” He hiked up the bag one more time as the other boy finally finished zipping it, before standing to his feet. He reached his hand out to the boy. “Sergeant Robert Clarington.”

The other boy looked at the hand for a moment in hesitation before finally gripping it back with a nod. “Private Chase Reynolds, sir.” Chase drew a breath, his shoulders relaxing as they started moving towards the front of the airport. The boy bit his lip as he looked back up at Robbie. “Forgive me if I’m overstepping, but is it too much of a leap to assume you’re related to late General? You do kind of have the exact same name.” 

Robbie glanced at him sideways with a small smile, though a ghost of sadness was peeping through. “My father,” he answered simply. “So no, not a big leap at all, good catch,” he said with just a hint of sarcasm, though not unkindly. 

Chase chuckled softly, finally trusting the air surrounding him and the man beside him. “Well, for what it’s worth, I’m sorry for your loss. My father served under him once, years ago, and he never had anything but good things to say about him. He sounds like a good man.” 

Robbie just nodded simply with a genuine smile. “He was. The best I could ask for,” he said shortly before clearing his throat to move on. “Do you have your assignments? Who are you reporting to?”

Chase took the change of subject with a small tilt of his head, reaching back around to grab a piece of paper out of the side pocket of his bag. He looked down at it, a small grin appearing on his face. “You, if you can believe it,” he chuckled, showing the paper to the Sergeant. 

He looked down at it, a small smile growing on his own face as he peered back at Chase. “Well, in that case, I think it’s fair to warn you that you shouldn’t expect special treatment, just because I helped you this time,” he teased with a small nudge to the other’s shoulder before clapping him on the back. “Well then, let’s go, Private.” 

----------------------------

Robbie lounged on his back on his cot, his knee propped up to hold his sketchbook as a pencil lazily stroked over lines in an attempt to recreate the gun that was leaning against a rack across him from him. After a couple days trek from one camp to the next, it was the only thing he had to allow him to actually relax. He always got this way during a tour, looking over his shoulder, wondering if they were going to find an ambush of some kind during simple scouting missions. So far, they’d been lucky, only facing the most routine of sweeps on the day-to-day. 

He always felt that he could breathe in the camps. They offered a bit more protection, even if they weren’t the most fortified of places. But even the curve of the tent roof offered him comfort with the illusion of a covered head. 

His lips twitched up as he heard cheers and laughter coming from the group outside. He was relieved to know that his team and the other teams traveling with them were at ease too. 

He lifted his head as another body rushed into the tent beside him. “Come on, Bobby, we need you out there.” Robbie rolled his eyes at his friend, shaking his head. Despite knowing it shouldn’t, the now couple of years of knowing each other had all but evaporated the formality between him and Chase. Long nights of comparing Army lives, talking about their interests, and having a genuine give-and-take humor tends to do that. He had made it clear though, that the nicknames and even the friendly banter stay to a minimum, lest the rest of the team start calling out favoritism, especially seeing as Chase genuinely was one of the top performers of the entire unit; he’d already been promoted to Specialist. Jealousy loves to run deep. 

“Ryn, I told you, not today. I’m exhausted, I need a chance to breathe,” Robbie groaned softly, shifting his legs to get more comfortable, his hand resting over the book. 

Chase knelt beside the cot, crossing his hands on top and looking up at his friend with big eyes. “Please, we’re getting slaughtered. Madison was a running back in high school, and it’s clear that those skills have not gone away.”

Robbie snorted softly, shaking his head again. “I was Quarterback, Chase, I’m not much good against an opposing team Running Back,” he said, glancing back down at the book to shade the butt of the gun. 

“Exactly, you were a Quarterback, we need the leadership, oh great one, we might actually-” he paused for a moment, looking down at the book.”Do you just not believe in drawing happy things, or...?”

The older man scoffed, shaking his head. “I draw what I have. Between the gun and the cot, which do you think is the better option?” 

Chase shrugged. “You at least get sleep out of the cot. Safety, at least a little bit of comfort. All you get from a gun is...” the answer hangs in the air for a moment before they both sigh. They’d both had to use their respective weapons, more times than either of them had ever wanted. But that’s what they had signed up for, defending the country and all that. “And also, I take offense to that,” the other continued, shaking the tension out of the room. “You have me.” Robbie quirked an eyebrow, staring at his friend with dry amusement. Chase cracked a grin. “Paint me like one of your French girls, Jack,” he said, his voice strained as he tried to suppress a laugh. 

Robbie pushed his face away, though his own laughter was pouring from his lips. “You’re actually an idiot, Reynolds.” 

“What! It could be cool! I could send it back to Cyn so she’d have something to remember me by,” though his grin was still in place as he righted himself again. 

“I’m not drawing you nudes to send to your girlfriend, asshole,” Robbie laughed, raising up and crossing his legs in front of him. “Be like everyone else and use a camera.”

“Woah, buddy, no one said anything about nudes. Maybe a tasteful nipple....”

“Absolutely not,” Robbie said, his laughs settling into chuckles. “I’ll try to draw happier things, deal?” 

Chase pouted for a moment before snorting softly and nodded. “Fine, I’ll take it. And I’ll try to ignore the fact that you won’t do the honor of drawing me.”

“Will you if I come play the game?” 

Chase grinned evilly and nodded. “You read my mind, Serg, let’s go.” 

---------------------------------

Robbie tried to keep the calm and level mask on as he sat in the infirmary. It wasn’t supposed to be any thing more than a scout mission to see if a nearby base reported by intelligence were still operational.  

Needless to say, it was. And just as Robbie had been giving the order to fall back, a shot rang out, hitting him square in the leg. It was no more than three men making up the opposing three, they went down easily, but not before inflicting damage on half of his team, including Chase.

As soon as they had made it back to camp, Robbie explained the situation, outlining the soldiers that needed the immediate attention, and refusing help of his own until he heard word back on all of them. 

Now he sat in a chair, close to Chase but so he could see the four wounded next to him, thinking over the attack and how to better prepare himself in the future. 

“Keep frowning like that, you’ll get worry lines,” he heard a small voice say next to him. 

Robbie’s expression didn’t change, only letting out a small breath of relief as he leaned forward. “What were you thinking, Chase? I told you to get out.” In a turn for the worse, the younger soldiers gun had jammed, leaving him almost defenseless. But instead of falling back as ordered, he had pulled out a knife and pushed forward, getting close enough to cut one guy down, but not before receiving a sharp blow to the head in retaliation. 

“That I’m one of your best fighters and I wasn’t going to leave you if there was a chance I could help,” the younger boy groaned out, digging his head deeper into the pillow. 

Robbie sighed, rubbing his face as he kept his voice low. “That’s very admirable, but do not disobey one of my orders again, Chase. I mean it. You got lucky, but there’s a saying ‘don’t bring a knife to a gun fight’ for a reason.” 

Chase rolled his eyes the best he could. “Oh my god, Chase, thank you so much for using your training and obvious superior stealth skills to kill a guy, ensuring that we could all get back to camp alive, you’re my hero.” 

Robbie reached over and shoved him softly. “Yeah, keep saying it in your head because you’re never going to hear it out loud. You’re my brother, Chase. I’ll be damned if I lose you because you wouldn’t listen to me.” 

The younger man scoffed just softly, but didn’t say anything. A silence rested over them for a moment before he broke it again. “When do you think this will be over? The war, the fighting? When do we get to go back home for good?” 

Robbie didn’t answer him, weighing each response in his head before he shook his head. “I don’t know,” he answered honestly, his voice quiet as he looked off at the other beds, other soldiers wounded but sleeping peacefully. 

“Do you still want me to draw you? For Cyn?” Robbie asked quietly. 

Chase glanced up at him, his brow furrowing. “I thought we agreed on happy things.”

Robbie shrugged. “It’ll make her happy. And it’ll make me happy if I can somehow disguise all the ugly.” 

The other boy rolled his eyes. “You’re kidding yourself if you think this bruise and swelling makes me ugly, Clarington.” 

“Who said anything about the ugly being tied to the injury?” All he got as he laughed was a feeble slap to the knee and a few quiet grumbles.  

----------------------

The day that Chase died didn’t stop playing in Robbie’s head, for lord knows how long. He lost track of the days, working only on autopilot, but not hearing anything that anyone said to him, not truly seeing. Chase Reynolds was his best friend, his charge, and now he was gone. 

The grenade, Chase running to cover it, the remaining pieces of his friend laying lifeless in front of him, his blank stare into the distance. 

It had caused many sleepless nights for him, more than usual, waking up covered in sweat and choked screams if he managed to sleep at all. No one said anything about it; they’d seen the aftermath themselves, most were dealing with nightmares of their own. Even trips to local towns for drinks of alcohol kept the dreams at bay for only a short period of time. 

His fellow soldiers learned quickly not to call him Bobby anymore; the nickname died with the person who gave it to him. 

The remains of Chases body had already been flown home, his funeral Robbie didn’t get to attend already passed, his family having already starting the painful process of grieving, a process that just 8 years before he’d had with his family in the loss of his father. 

He sucked in a deep breath as he pulled himself off his cot, and pulled himself to his desk, pulling out his sketchbook and flipping to the unfinished sketch he had of started of Chase. He already felt the tears forming in his eyes, but he took a breath through it as he grabbed his pencil and set to work using nothing but his memory to darken lines, shade crooks, add texture to the hair, and most importantly, do everything to make sure the eyes staring at him from the page were as far from lifeless as the ones that had stared at him on the ground. 

After hours of diligent work and a stiff hand, he sat back. He would never be satisfied with his own work, and the knowledge that it wasn’t for him only made the dissatisfaction worse, but he knew that there was nothing more he could do. 

He gently slid another piece of paper towards him, readying his pencil again, but all he could do was stare at the page. What would he, of all people, be able to say to make this entire process easier? He, who stood his ground in fear as his eyes fell on the grenade while Chase, only 22, the age Robbie was when he had met him, hardly hesitated to throw himself on top of it to save him and countless others. 

Robbie stifled a sob, letting it stick in his throat. He had cried enough, and though the guilt and regret would stick with him probably for the rest of his life, this was something he had to do. 

With tears rolling down his cheek, he put the pencil to paper to start writing. 

To the Reynolds family, 

My name is Robert Clarington, I’m the Sergeant of the unit that housed Private Chase. But more than that, I considered Chase a very close friend, and I would like to think that I was the same to him. 

I know there’s not much I can say to make this easier for you. It’s a hard loss to take myself, I can only imagine the what you’re going through right now. All I can say is that it was the greatest honor, knowing Chase. His wit, wisdom, skill, and heart all are things that can’t be matched, and I know that I’m not the only one in this unit that felt the affect that Chase could give off. He was the backbone of this unit, and our lives will be forever changed and better because we knew him. 

With this letter, you’ll find a sketch I did of Chase. He liked to tease me that I only ever drew things that were ‘unhappy’, just things I could find around camp or the tents we stayed in, when he was right there. I know it’s a little too late to admit, but he was right; he was probably the happiest thing I could’ve chosen to draw. 

I hope it brings you some comfort. It was originally for Cynthia, but I think it’s for you to decide what to do with it. 

I’ve nothing else to say, except to try and assure you that Chase and his service here did mean something. Without him, I wouldn’t be here, countless other soldiers wouldn’t be either, and this country should be beyond thankful, that it got the honor of a selfless and brave soldier like Chase Reynolds defending it. 

My best wishes and deepest condolences, 

Robert Clarington II

Robbie set the pencil down with a deep breath, releasing it slowly as he looked over the words. He grabbed an envelope, folding the letter and the sketch quickly and placing them in and sealing it before he could change his mind. He scribbled the address that he’d seen Chase write countless times onto the front, placing a stamp in the corner before standing up to walk it to the mail drop. 

With one last resigned sigh, he dropped it in and took a step back. He collected himself for a moment before holding his chin high. It’s almost as if he could feel Chase now, nudging his shoulder with a quick grin, whispering Stop mourning me, you asshole. Get back to work.

So that’s what he did. 

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2018 Oscars: The Best, Worst and Weirdest Moments of the Night

The 90th Annual Academy Awards aired Sunday, with Jimmy Kimmel at the helm for the second time following last year's shocking Best Picture mix-up, and the talented host deftly handled the multitude of political controversies that have rocked Hollywood over the last year, while ushering the show along with quick wit and charm.

The star-studded show was filled with some incredibly close races and a few genuinely surprising upsets, not to mention a slew of emotionally charged acceptance speeches and hilarious moments of touching comedy.

In honor of Hollywood's biggest night, here is a look at some of the best, worst and absolutely weirdest moments from this year's Oscars.

THE BEST

Classic Hollywood Intro

In honor of this Oscar's milestone anniversary, Kimmel kicked the show off in the style of a retro 1940s newsreel. Shot in black-and-white and narrated (by Kimmel) in an old-timey radio voice, he highlighted a few of the night's biggest stars sitting in the audience, including Meryl Streep, Gary Oldman, Salma Hayek and Lupita Nyong'o, who he introduced by sharing, "She was born in Mexico and raised in Kenya. Let the tweetstorm from the president's toilet begin!"

Kimmel's Politically Charged Intro

Ed Herrera

Kimmel once again proved his Oscar-hosting chops with his hilarious opening monologue that managed to nudge the envelope with jokes about a spate of awful stories of sexual harassment and abuse of power without offending everyone (a lesson James Corden could have used before hosting the amfAR gala back in October). Kimmel turned his razor-sharp wit toward Oscar himself, explaining, "Oscar is the most beloved and respected man in Hollywood, and there's a good reason. Just look at him. He keeps his hands where you can see them, never says a rude word, and most importantly, no penis at all."

Hellen Mirren Presents a Grand Prize

Kimmel also revealed that, in an attempt to keep the show as short as possible, winners' acceptance speeches would be timed and the person with the shortest speech would win a brand new jet-ski. To prove he was serious, the back of the stage opened to reveal the aquatic prize, as Oscarwinner Helen Mirren stepped out, looking as regal as ever, to serve as a Price Is Right-esque prize model, and she reminded us all what timeless grace really is.

Rita Moreno Proves She's Just the Best

The 86-year-old West Side Story star won in just about every way imaginable at this year's Oscars. She rocked the same dress she was wearing when she earned her Best Supporting Actress Oscar in 1962, she appeared to be enjoying quite a few drinks backstage and she was generally just flawless at every turn.  

Allison Janney's Great Opening Line

The I, Tonya star took to the stage after winning the Oscar for Best Supporting Actress and delivered one of the greatest opening lines of any acceptance speech ever: "I did it all by myself." After the laughter died down, Janney smiled and added, "There's nothing further from the truth," before earnestly thanking her co-stars, friends and family. This was Janney's first nomination and win, but it's still hard not to wish she stuck with her joke and walked off stage after accepting all the credit.

Tiffany Haddish Stuns in Her Favorite Dress

The Girls Trip star presented alongside Maya Rudolph during the Oscars, and she looked absolutely flawless in her gorgeous Alexander McQueen dress. In fact, she's looked flawless in it every time she's worn it, which is quite a lot. Haddish even wore it while hosting Saturday Night Live earlier this season, and explained that she loves the dress because it looks great on her and she bought it herself and she doesn't see any reason not to wear it every chance she gets. It was an absolutely perfect choice for making her debut on the Oscars stage.

'In Memoriam' Honors Late Stars

Eddie Vedder provided the emotional musical accompaniment for this year's "In Memoriam" segment, where he performed a cover of Tom Petty's "Room at the Top" in honor of the late musician. The touching segment celebrated the lives and legacies of such late Hollywood luminaries as Harry Dean Stanton, director George A. Romero, James Bond star Roger Moore, Martin Landau, John Heard, Sam Shepard and Don Rickles, among many others.

Keala Settle Slays 'This Is Me'

The amazing singer delivered a live performance of the Best Original Song nominee "This Is Me" from The Greatest Showman, and she brought the entire room to their feet (and to the verge of tears) with the amazing number. The song might not have won the Oscar,  but the performance definitely stole the spotlight at the show.

Frances McDormand Takes a Stand

The outspoken actress took home the golden statuette for Best Actress for her role in Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri, and she used her time onstage to make an important statement. McDormand asked every female Oscar nominee in the audience to stand up, and during the emotionally charged demonstration of unity, McDormand asked every executive watching to help female filmmakers and stars tell their stories on the big screen. She then finished her speech with two important words: "Inclusion rider." The term refers to a stipulation in an actor's contract that requires the cast and crew on the films they're acting in to be diverse, or risk losing the star. It was a powerful moment and one that will undoubtedly go down in Oscars history.  

THE WORST

The Over-the-Top Ice Palace Set

%Mark Ralston/AFP/Getty Images

While the Academy Awards tries something different every year when it comes to its set design, we couldn't help but feel like they were staging a production of Frozen. It looked like Superman's Fortress of Solitude got a glittery makeover, or the inside of a particularly ostentatious geode. Every time someone stood onstage, they looked like they were about to get eaten by a shark that had its teeth replaced with diamonds. It was just too much all the time.

Kimmel Brings Out His 9-year-old Self

In a joke that just fell flat, Kimmel brought out a young kid who was playing himself as a child. The exchange allowed a few funny jokes about how old the host looks (with the kid assuming Kimmel is his 60-year-old future version, when Kimmel is only 50). But given how often he joked about wanting to keep the show moving along, this felt like a very unnecessary bit that took time away from what could have been better moments.

Not Giving BB-8 His Due

Star Wars: The Last Jedi co-stars Oscar Isaac, Mark Hamill and Kelly Marie Tran took the stage alongside everyone's favorite rolling droid, but while the three stars had awkward banter that elicited polite laughter (at best), BB-8 was relegated to the sidelines. His adorable beeping would have unfortunately been better than whatever it was we got from the human stars.  

THE WEIRDEST

Lakeith Stanfield's Wonderful Awkwardness

In an ongoing effort to keep acceptance speeches short, Kimmel revealed that stars who rambled on too long wouldn't get played off by the orchestra, instead they would get chased off by Stanfield, reprising his unsettling role from Get Out, who ran out from behind the stage dressed in the same wardrobe as his character in the film, madly screaming "Get out!" The bit was hilarious, but the perpetually fascinating Atlanta star elevated the comedy to the next surreal level when he just sort of stayed onstage before slowly walking back behind the set as Kimmel laughed at his deliberate brand of awkwardness. It was a weird moment, but that doesn't necessarily mean it wasn't a strong highlight.

- Jimmy Kimmel Brings Stars to the People

In a reverse of Kimmel's stunt from last year -- when he brought random people from off the street into the Dolby Theatre to meet the night's big stars -- Kimmel filled the theater next door with people who were watching a sneak preview of A Wrinkle in Time, and then surprised them when he brought a cadre of A-listers into the theater to meet them. Margot Robbie, Ansel Elgort, Armie Hammer, Gal Gadot and others were among those who joined in on the fun by passing out movie concessions and firing off hot dog cannons (which are exactly what they sound like) into the overjoyed theater of screaming fans. While there was a certain fun, chaotic energy to the bit, it proved to be far less bizarrely fun than last year's stunt and ended up just feeling like an ill-conceived attempt at being weird for weirdness sake.

'In Memoriam' Snubs

Every year, the Oscars draw heat for the stars they forget (or choose to not include) in their "In Memoriam" segment, and this year was no different. Among the snubs that drew the most viewer anger were actors Powers Boothe, Robert Guillaume, John Hillerman, Adam West, Jim Nabors, John Mahoney, Rose Marie and Jerry Van Dyke, among many others.  

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