#i want to say they are cowards but i trust them so im just gonna go with they didn't have enough episode to do just that

[ofstarsandvibranium]

Walls Are Crumbling: Part 2

Fandom: Bridgerton

Pairing: Benedict Bridgerton x F!Reader

Summary: You and Benedict announce your engagement to the rest of the Bridgerton family. They're ecstatic for you, as Benedict told you they'd be. But you still can't help but feel guilty for bringing Benedict into your mess.

A/N: oh no. i guess im gonna turn this into a mini series...

Part 1

Everyone in the sitting room cheers after you and Benedict announce your engagement. Anthony and Kate give the pair of you soft smiles and knowing looks. Of course Anthony told his wife. He could never hide anything from her.

"Well, I must say this isn't too much of a surprise," Violet Bridgerton stands from her spot and walks towards you, "We all had a feeling this was going to happen eventually."

You smile at the woman you saw as another mother, "Trust me, Violet, I'm just as surprised as you are."

Benedict gives you a nudge, silently telling you to shush. He then speaks up, "Yes, it seemed that both of us had been harboring feelings for each other for a long time. Didn't see a reason as to why we needed to prolong marriage. Therefore, in month's time, we seek to marry."

Eloise grimaces, "But that's so soon."

Benedict's hand intertwines in yours, "Well, Eloise, I've waited too long to have Y/N as mine, so the sooner we wed, the better."

"But not too soon," you pointedly say, "which is why we decided in month's time," you add, just in case someone else suggests you two marry today, like Anthony did last night.

"Did you tell your mother already, Y/N, dear?" Violet asks curiously.

You nod, "Yes, and it went as you'd expect it to."

The dowager viscountess gives you a tight lip look. She wasn't fond of your mother and how she treats you. She especially doesn't like how she viewed your friendship with Benedict as a waste.

"Second sons have nothing to offer," she's said often.

Kate approaches you, arm looping through yours, "Sorry, brother-in-law, may I steal her for a moment?"

Benedict cocks a brow at you, silently asking if you'll be okay. You nod, "I'll be back," you let go of his hand and follow Kate, whom is guiding you outside of the sitting room and into the hall. There, she asks you to tell her everything, since Anthony only gave her bits and pieces.

While you and the Viscountess talk, Anthony joins his younger brother, "Do you really think you should do this?"

Benedict looks at his brother with annoyance on his face, "If I don't, she'd be left off to her own. I can't let that happen, especially with a child on the way."

"A child that isn't even yours, brother."

He shakes his head and shrugs, "I don't care. I will love them as my own. They are part Y/N, so surely, I'd love them." He then scowls, "Lord Mattias is a coward for this."

"I'd argue that you're just as cowardly," Anthony murmurs, a hint of a smirk on his lips, "Marrying the woman you love and yet not even telling her how you feel."

Benedict scoffs, "As if I should be taking advice from you on how to handle love," he cocks a brow at his older brother, knowing the debacle between him, Kate, and Edwina.

Anthony's jaw clenches and he doesn't say another word, which leaves Benedict to chuckle. He pats his brother on the shoulder, "I'll tell her...eventually. Things are going to be chaotic for her already. I don't want to cause her any more stress. It'll be bad for her and the baby."

Anthony hums and walks away from Benedict, deciding to stand beside Colin, whom is sitting on chaise lounge chair.

__________________________

1 Month Later

You managed to have wedding dress made fairly quickly. Well, Lady Danbury definitely put in a good word for you that helped speed up the process. Your wedding, albeit not ideal, was still perfect. Although your words of love to Benedict during the ceremony were....not completely true, you still found yourself tearing up when Benedict repeated his vows to you. You thought marrying your closest friend would be weird, but throughout the duration of the month leading up to the wedding, it became less of that and more comforting.

Time and time again did Benedict reassure he wasn't going to leave you behind for the wolves, that he'd be there for you and for the baby. That you'd be well taken care of.

Post-wedding, the dinner was a bit overwhelming. So many people were congratulating you, echoing the same words everyone else had "We all knew this would happen eventually". But what exactly did that mean? Sure, a few years ago, you harbored feelings for Benedict, but did everyone see it? Benedict couldn't have seen it too, right?

"Y/N?" he squeezes your hand and you didn't even realize he was holding it.

You look up from your plate, "Hm? Sorry."

"Are you alright?"

"I-I think I'd like some air," you whisper back to him.

"Would you like me to come with you?"

You're hesitant to say yes, but your head moves before your mouth does. You're nodding and Benedict is immediately on his feet and excuses the both of you. Everyone watches the two of you exit the dining room, the chatter continues as you leave.

Benedict silently follows you to the tree that has the swings you two used to play on when you were young. once sat on one of the swings, your hand immediately going to your belly. You've been doing that a lot in these past weeks, just not in front of others beside Anthony and Benedict.

"Is something wrong?" he nods to your hand on your belly.

You shake your head, "Not with the baby, no. But I just-" you let out another deep breath, "This is all so much. I-I-" your eyes are tearing up, "I don't like that I've brought you into my mess."

Benedict kneels before you and grabs your hands into his, "Y/N, listen to me, you did not force me to do this. I offered to marry you because I care about you and I'd hate for anything bad to happen to you. You are my dearest friend. I won't let anything bad happen to you. Ever. Do you understand me?" thumbs away your tears as you nod, "Good." He stands up and kisses your head, "Do you want to go back?"

"Can we stay here for a little longer?"

"Whatever my wife wants."

"I have to get used to hearing that," you mumble as you start to slowly move yourself back and forth on the swing.

Benedict watches you with soft eyes, eventually moving himself on the swing.

[mcsm-confessions]

ok so im the same guy that mentioned the soren and lukas parallels so im gonna copy-paste my ramble from discord

first off using my headcanons for the characters im mentioning:

lukas [he/they/she]

soren [he/she]

anyway:

first off: his parallel with soren. lukas is a complete and utter coward at first, similar to soren. she usually freezes in place instead of running away, but especially when you confront lukas about his friend nearly setting reuben on fire, he deflects the blame and says that reuben seems just fine. sure, when you bring lukas with you one the wither storm is unleashed they're a little too eager to step up and lead, which COULD be seen as an act of bravery, but i see it more as lukas behaving in a way that's familiar to them. she could be a bit frustrated when anyone else is trying to lead, and literally tries to tell you and axel, the people that her friend group has been bullying for probably a WHILE now, that you axel is going way outta line when literally confronting him rightfully for this behavior. sure, the argument got a bit too heated and lukas nearly left, but lukas was really the one out of line when trying to lead a group that didnt want, nor need his lead. lukas isnt just a parallel to soren because of his building skills: its because of her, at first, cowardly nature, and their unwillingness to take the blame for anything that he's caused or at least been apart of. where this gets even more interesting is lukas' character arc, where he begins to actually get braver. she offers to genuinely help out more, instead of having this utter desperation to be apart of something familiar, like a friend group. when everyone gets into the end, they offer to lead the group to safety instead of petra, seeing as they're very sickly. while yes, he seems a Little bit desperate to do so, this more seems to be for petra's safety rather than a personal gain, like getting jesse's trust. when the wither storm dies the first time, lukas is actively wanting to go out and find her friends, and literally RETURNS with them if jesse lets her leave, helping save jesse and gang in the process. lukas' story arc is about a coward turning to bravery and selflessness, which is a direct opposite to how soren's story plays out. and i just think that's neat.

i think she's just neat. ok. the fact that she starts out as an enemy of jesse's gang and slowly becomes part of the group. while soren starts out as part of the order but distances herself and just becomes unrespectable by the others [except ivor] after running away in fear from the second wither storm fight. soren actively makes himself the victim of the situation after spending so long in isolation, a situation that HE caused, mind you. lukas, similarly, sees that he has no fault in anything at first. he's an incredibly awkward insecure loser once you get to know him, but that part is so incredibly surprising because you're immediately trained to think that lukas is an arrogant piece of shit with no interest in actually being friendly towards you. soren is ALSO an incredibly awkward insecure loser off the get-go, though can also be arrogant and comes off as a bit of a know-it-all, again refusing to take blame for anything that happens, ESPECIALLY when the formidi-bomb fails. granted soren has probably had several years alone to reflect on something like this, and especially considering he's been ALONE and soren's general personality, that could absolutely form some sort of bias towards herself. lukas was just surrounded by shitty people in a shitty situation, and once taken out of that environment, becomes a much kinder, albeit awkward person after a while. anyway all im saying is that soren and lukas have a lot in common more than just being the builders of their group because that is an INCREDIBLY shallow interpretation of their parallels with each other. i wish soren and lukas interacted with one another so we could see how they reflected on the other's attitude and behavior but its whateverrrrrrr i can imagine sick and twisted scenarios in my mind ok. lukas would see a lot of herself in soren and i think that would unnerve him just a bit, maybe cause a bit more self-reflection. maybe getting to know soren is what helps lukas dig deeper into themself and go "oh im kind of an asshole. this guy is kind of an asshole. i dont wanna be like this guy, i dont wanna hurt the people i care about" and etc etc. im just a little bit crazy. but also maybe its for the best this never happened because people would interpret them as a father-son relationship :////////////////

regardless im getting mad about fictional things. thank god im cool because i can do what i want and nobody can stop me! anyways soren couldve been a very useful plot device for lukas' own self-reflection especially after lukas leads everyone to safety and that only FURTHERS lukas' realization and change in attitude and switch from selfish to selfless. i keep repeating myself but i do genuinely think this is so underthought about. i havent talked about lukas in a bit forgive me but i have been cooking up sick and twisted thoughts in the back of my brain for a while. this hit me out of nowhere its a VERY half-baked analysis but i wanted to share this with you all because i feel like you guys would actually understand

tldr: lukas ends up surrounded by people she loves and cares for, and they love and care for him as well because he learned from their mistakes and made amends. soren ends up alone because of his own faults and refuses to reflect on herself, which lukas was dangerously close to being exactly like

~~~

[intertexts]

OKAY BECAUSE I HAVE STILL NOT WRITTEN DOWN ALL OF MY THOUGHTS AND THEYRE JUST KIND OF FLOATING AROUND VAGUELY IN MY BRAIN SOUP.... holds out my hands like a starving victorian child. tell me about your william first death thoughts <3 what the hell sent that boy over a cliff edge. how long did he stay at the bottom. what was his first glimpse of the spirit world like. etc etc etc !!!!!!

GOD. WIWI TIME. you KNOW this is going to be an indecipherable soup of thoughts. if i was saying this all in person u know i would have like. pages of notes with a billion little paragraphs going a billion directions & arrows pointing all over the place. but. let's see what we've got. i love being normal about william wisp!!!

you know my thoughts on those damn wisps. first off. like before i even get started i cannot overstate how "something alien that loves you and wants you but doesn't have any conception of how humans work or how their affection hurts the thing they want " they are to me. they are a little kid who's trying to catch a lightning bug and crushing it in their hands, except they want to crush it and they don't get how killing a lightning bug is bad. they are going oh we like this kid he's nosy and curious (and he also wants to be dead? hey, we're dead! awesome! i see no problem with this!) we want him dead :)

the thing that i guess has slowly solidified in my head as to how the hell that boy went over a cliff......... god this is going to be so incoherent. you're in for it.

i do really love the folklore of will-o-the-wisps-- hypnotically leading you astray and off paths and down places you'll never return from. i think also that the wisps actively tugging him in that direction in some form resonates in a really painful way with the "haha! william wisp everybody wants to manipulate and use you for their own goals and you keep falling victim to wanting to trust people and getting fucking hurt by it (said in the haha jonathan you are banging my daughter cadence)" thing. how many of the pivotal choices in will's life were made because *he* wanted them. how much of what's happened to him is him getting tossed around from person to person!!

simultaneously: god you know he fucking killed himself man. you know he did. i'm not even-- staring at u with a hopeless expression and my hands in my hair. like. obviously he did. william wisp boy scout. william wisp always prepared with 1 million useful tools. william wisp grew up running around in the woods. william wisp who loved hiking and was always outside. you don't do that accidentally, unless you're an absolute idiot in a very precarious situation, neither of which i think apply to him. he still... chose to follow the wisps. i think. like, that decision Was His. he wasn't hypnotized out of his gourd or something. in my mind maybe it was a bit less of a "this time i'm really gonna do it" and more of a "this is interesting and beautiful and compelling and i honestly don't really give a shit if i die? maybe that's what this means. maybe that's what the woods are telling me that i'm right and i shouldn't be here after all." actually yeah no i just arrived at this conclusion myself and im fucking. yeah. kemuri voice if you weren't a coward you'd have killed yourself already. wisps voice yeah you know how you think about bleeding out sometimes? yeah you should do that. that would be good. that's all you've good for. it would be the best thing you possibly could do right now (to them it IS. they want him dead so they can have him!!!!). yeah c'mere come this way yeah keep following me. look at that drop. look at how pretty it is.

so. i guess. there's your answer to what i think happened there!!!!! regardless of being influenced the choice was his, ultimately. i think it takes away frm his whole narrative if it was not an intentional decision. to do that. & also i think his parents & the people around him Know That. stares at his dynamic with his parents. staring at it. (also just. william wisp clinical depression. he's just fucked up that way even with good parents even outside the deadwood horrors. he's just like that. important to me. passively suicidal long b4 he fell in the deeply miserable high schooler way. god he must have been like.. fourteen fifteen? sophmore when it happened? but GOD the deadwood horrors also. growing up being absolutely alienated from everyone around u except a handful of people.....)

I HAVE NOT ACTUALLY LIKE. thought about how long he was there for very much. but i think it was quick for him and long, like, objectively. in my head i have been thinking that it just. happened while he was alone and he came back alone but i don't know if he would tell his parents. would he tell his parents? i don't know if he'd danny phantom it or if he'd come back limping and pale and brown with dried blood and go hey mom? in a choked wobbly trying to hold back tears voice & accidentally phase through her arms when she tried to hug him.

either that or i think he should come back while the cops are crouched over his body. early morning freezing cold his parents crying a couple yards away no paramedics because they couldn't make it through the forest and there's no nearby safe helicopter landing space. just open his eyes laura palmer style. the like,,,, finality of it to everyone around him. they Knew He Was Dead. not that laura palmer did that but i'm picturing that opening scene of them finding her washed up body u know.

regardless: i don't think he saw the spirit world until... god. when's the first time he did in canon. his second death? i don't think he knew Anything. i don't think the wisps gave him shit!!!! he just woke up no heartbeat no breath falling through floors and phasing through people nobody to ask about it. his parents didn't know anything he didn't either!! anyway. leaving you with this.

[bookish-phile]

fourth wing in a nutshell (i think?)

“Stop letting fear leach into your voice,” Luca snaps from behind Rhiannon. “If the dragons think you’re a coward, you’ll be nothing but a name tomorrow.” “She says,” Ridoc narrates, “inducing more fear.”

“It’s been rather surprising to watch, actually.” “Happy to be your entertainment. I’m going to bed.”

“Hell yes!” Ridoc yells, hooting from the top. “That’s our girl!”

“Get on your back?” I repeat like a fucking parrot.

“You’re making us look bad. Stop it.”

“You will not fall. I will not allow it.” “You will trust me.”

“But…” I shake my head. “Dragons value strength and cunning and…ferocity in their riders.” None of which defines me. “Please, do tell me more about what I should value.”

“For the record, please tell me the name of the dragon who chose you.” I lift my chin. “Tairneanach.” “Pronunciation could use some work.” Tairn’s voice rumbles through my head.

I belong to Tairn and Andarna…and, in some really fucked-up way…Xaden.

Tell him to ease up on you.” “Tell him to mind his own business.”

“Tairn says if you harm me, he’ll burn you,” I say as dragons to the left and right launch skyward without their riders, headed back to the Vale. But not Tairn. Nope, he’s still standing behind me like an overprotective dad.

and it’s not like Liam here is sleeping in my bedroom.” “I mean, I’m not opposed—”

“Oh, are we telling dick jokes now?” Ridoc asks from Liam’s side. “Because my entire life has led up to this very moment.”

"..but Sgaeyl does whatever she wants, whenever she wants.."

“Are we on offense or defense?” I ask Xaden. “Little busy right now.” “Oh no, am I distracting you?” A smile curves my mouth. Shit, am I flirting? Maybe. Do I care? Oddly enough…no. “Yes.”

“What did she say?” Xaden asks, gripping my shoulders to steady me. Tairn growls and a puff of steam blasts us both. “I’d take your hands off the rider,” Sgaeyl warns.

“Fuck, that stubborn, feisty look always makes me want to kiss you.”

but it’s not his position that steals my breath. It’s the saddle strapped across his back that has me gawking. “I hear it’s all the fashion,” Tairn brags.

“Third-years are taught to build wards, and at this point in the year, they’re leaving anyway.” I shrug. “May as well send them early so they can be of use.” “Point fucking made.”

Dress uniforms only.” She lifts her brows at Ridoc. He shrugs. “What else would I be wearing?” “One never knows what you’ll come up with,” Devera says, dismissing us.

“So she’s grown quite close to him out of necessity.” Out of lust and need and the ache in my chest I’m terrified to define, but sure, necessity works.

“Then what made you even think that? Have to admit, it pissed me off. I’ve given you exactly zero reasons to think I’m in anyone else’s bed.”

anyway i almost forgot to post this and i also think no one actually read till the end bc i never read long posts so im gonna assume no one else does either

also these are just some stuff i found funny

[caplanbuckybarnes]

BrokenHearts4Caplan Challenge

**ignore the graphic, i did it in literally two minutes lol.

So it's been a little while since i hosted a challenge, and since my last one sadly flopped, i ran a poll over sometime, and an angst challenge won the poll. (don't worry, im still gonna do the other writing challenge soon!)

But on the note! here's the newest challenge for you all!

----------

Rules:

It’s not necessary to follow me, but it’s always appreciated.

There are no deadlines, but please keep me updated on your fics.

Tag the fic #brokenheartsforcaplan

Also tag me in the authors notes (along with the hashtag so I know which Masterlist to place the fic when I post it)

Please tag the proper warnings before the fic

Must be MCU characters only

prompts are all up for grabs. they will not be crossed out if taken

No RPFs

If you’d like to write for more than one prompt, please make them separate fics

Can be however long you’d like the fic to be. (If it’s more than 450 words PLEASE use the keep reading feature.

If I do not respond to your fic being posted in 24hours of you posting the fic, please message me a link.

Send me an ask or a DM with your prompt and the character you’re writing for.

Prompts are down below

“I can’t pretend to love you anymore.”

“Please don’t do this.”

“I loved you, with every fiber of my being. And this is how you return the love?”

“Why don’t you trust me?”

“This can’t be goodbye.”

“Don’t come back ever again.”

“First time seeing a dead body, eh?”

“Please don’t walk out.”

“Why are you doing this?”

“We were never meant to be.”

“I just wanted to be enough for you.”

“I don’t forgive you.”

“Stop saying sorry! It’s always ‘I’m sorry’. When you really aren’t!”

“Get up and fight, you coward!”

“I know you’re lying.”

“I’m so stupid to think we had something.”

“You never cared about me.”

“This isn’t working…”

“I can’t believe you thought this was real.”

“No. We can’t… we are too toxic for each other.”

“Why me..?”

“Us? There was never an ‘us’.”

“No, we can’t- we can't do this.”

“Someone might see us- stop.”

"... What else am I supposed to do?"

“Where else can I go?”

“What do you mean, you’re dying?”

“How could you do this to me?”

“You were never supposed to survive that mission!”

“Leave them; they’re mine!"

“Did you really mean that? you don’t love me?”

“If you don’t love me, prove it to me. prove to me that you’ve never felt something towards me. look at me.”

” Is this what you wanted, huh? you could just make me fall in love with you and then just- just fucking leave? do you really expect me to be okay with that?”

“I wish we had more time.”

“This isn’t the real you talking.”

"Freedom is just a concept, isn't it?"

"I'm not some toy you can play with!"

“Don’t you love me?”

“What did you expect me to say?”

“This will be the last time you lie to me.”

“How did you think this wouldn’t hurt me?”

“I hope you're happier.”

“At least you got what you wanted.”

“I was miserable, and I still loved you.”

“Stop pretending. You wanted me like this… You wanted me broken and you got what you wanted.”

“You don’t own me.”

“I was nothing to you. I was only a toy for you to manipulate and I fell for it.”

“I spent so much time hoping you’d come back to me.”

"You mean nothing to me."

“If I leave, you will never see me again.”

“Don’t – Don’t make me fall in love again.”

“No, please, I don't want to die!”

“Why can’t you be happy for me for once?”

“We shouldn’t be together anymore. I’m supposed to hate you.”

“Why would you do this to us?”

“How could I be so oblivious.”

“Why did I even think I could be enough for you?”

“I needed to hold you once more.”

“I don’t understand... Wha- what are you saying...”

“I don’t want to say something I’ll regret later.”

“Haha! You think I love you? That’s pathetic.”

“What the fuck do you mean, you killed him?”

“You don’t get to leave and then come back after all this time and expect me to welcome you with open arms.”

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

MAC HI don't mind me i just finished the genloss founders cut and im putting my ful lreview in ur inbox bc u said u weren't gonna watch it i think but i want 2 share my thoughts with someone who will not rip me to shreds for criticizing it even slightly <3

OK. I'M NOT GONNA LIE. IT KINDA SLAPPED. maybe i just think it was really good in comparison to the original four hours of streams that dragged on. i honestly thought the original streams of genloss were longer but NO all three streams add up to about four hours???? it just felt so much longer when i originally watched it i guess!!! u can understand why i am sure. but the founders cut was like two and a half and oh my goddddd cutting out a lot of it made such a huge difference. holy shit. like i definitely did get bored and skip through a little bit but honestly i didn't skip through much!! every time i got to a part where i was like "oh fuck not THIS bit that goes on for 30-45 minutes god dammit" it ended up being like maybe ten minutes at most which was SUCH A GODSEND. i am delighted to report that they cut the half hour cooking bit in the first episode down to like 7-8 minutes <3 the best surprise ranboo could have given me tbh. like with the way things were cut down and framed differently i actually laughed at a couple points????? WILD. did not think i would find any genuine comedy here. lowkey there were points that were funny. insane

honestly with the unfunny bits being cut down, it actually let the slightly more serious lore bits shine more, and the payoff for when it got to the third episode felt SO much more deserved. like. the original streams i'd probably give a 3/10 collectively and that's being generous but i would unironically say the founder's cut deserves like a 7/10. maybe a 7.5 if i found it in myself to ignore the bad special effects. (there was still plenty of bad comedy ngl i still don't know why charlie slimecicle's face was superimposed on a towel. that scene was nothing. it was literally nothing. they could have removed it and it would change nothing but they kept it in idk why)

ANYWAY. if they had released genloss like this first maybe i would unironically be a fan of it now. tbh. i would still be making fun of the bad comedy and the horror that was barely horror but i think i would actually be like participating in the fandom a lil and i would probably find it in me to find some charm in the bad special effects. all in all Not Bad!! not good, but not like actively bad. ofc im still running on the adrenaline of the ending because episode 3 was objectively the best out of them all so maybe my perception is skewed but. kinda decent. 7/10 👍 anyway i hope ur havin a good day i hope to finish pd season one soon over the next couple days!!!!!

taking the cowards route and putting my thoughts under the cut bc a lot of my mutuals these days really enjoy genloss and i don't want them to be mad at me

(genloss crit/neg/whatever under the cut)

dude this makes me so unironically sad . why the FUCK was genloss what it was the first time around when this was obviously the better route to go from the very beginning. I am still staunchly in my "I don't like genloss" position but. I DID WATCH IT. i sat through ALL of the original streams and it was so miserable for me. im not going 2 watxh the directors cut or whatever bc i dont hate myself enough to sit through all of that again but i trust your opinion!! if only it would've been planned out thought out prerecorded videos from the start I also probably would not hate it as much as I do!!! maybe I even would've liked it !!! (<< not likely bc i do have Other Issues with it than just the fact that it was too long too unfunny too unfocused etc whatever im getting into hater territory sorry. always welcome 2 genloss fans to try to explain to my why its Good Actually so i can recommend them actual horror media)

like . the streams added absolutely NOTHING to it other than that final choice scene or whatever. and even if they wanted to do that still u know what would've been an awesome smart choice??? prerecord and edit the whole thing and then premiere THAT video on twitch- then when it comes time for the final choice you can still have people vote!! then you can have two separate endings prepared based on which way the vote was swaying. like. its that easy. it would've made the whole experience so much more enjoyable . ughhghghg the fucking wasted potential on HOURS of unfunny badly improvved bits is so devastating

personally I still cant excuse the bad effects considering the amount of times ranboo bragged about the genloss budget like. maybe you should've used your resources better and also if it would've just been prerecorded from the start things wouldn't look as rushed as they did but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ what do I know !!

anyway I'm so glad this version was better but for me it will always ALWAYS be tainted by the . misery I felt while watching the streams lmaoooo . I wanted to like genloss so bad. I tried so hard. head in hands !!!!!!!!!!!

[peppersnot]

its been 2 weeks but the bad vibes ive been sending horikoshi have not subsided. they have gotten worse. i feel like a total bitch but i absolutely wish the worst upon that man for the way he set up a story for 10 fucking years and then turned everything around on its head and destroyed it all. what did I read it for? what did i get out of it? that everything amounts to nothing? mha has given me so many trust issues i don't know how I'll ever be able to get into any series ever again without constantly thinking "is this gonna be another horikoshi?" and its maddening because as a reader and a fan, i feel like he just wasted all my time, money and energy. what did i put all that into being a fan for? i defended it against ppl who called it generic because it really truly wasnt. i bought the volumes, i bought merch, i spent so much time on this series, all for hori to turn around and say hey, fuck you, actually everything is the exact opposite of what I'd set up and none of the themes the story established meant anything after all. no arcs concluded, no growth acknowledged, it's me and my dolls who i wanted to make kiss, but im too much of a coward to even do that. what was all of that for? making fun of the people who supported you over a decade? alienating them and pandering to the most vile and disgusting part of the fanbase who dont even really contribute towards your series in any meaningful way? i don't want to be so mean about it but i genuinely hope everything he ever plans in the future flops because he doesn't deserve the attention anymore and we don't deserve the disrespect.

[cookiecomics]

Anonymous Coward asked: sometimes it’s not even just whiteness (referring to a tweet of yours) but just like how pervasive every part of it can be. ignorance of culture, policing and harassment of others, assumptions about what everyone else’ experience should be. Like sometimes it isn’t even visible but you can just… tell???? how much a space is affected by whiteness as a concept (idk if im making sense. anyways)

No, you get it lol. It isn't something you can see if you're not outside of that bubble, but you can feel it and at times it's very unbearable. White people a lot of the times do not notice how white a space is and how it trickles down to accepted idea, accepted faces, perceived kindness and grace. But I also cannot understate how people don’t find it odd how hard it is to find black folks in the same fandom spaces as everyone despite us being huge nerds just like everyone else and folks don’t think about why that is you know? They don’t see a server and ask if it’s safe for black folks, they don’t wonder these things because they feel comfortable and that’s what matters. Honestly, being in fandom feels like that time I went to a karaoke party and I was the only black person there and everyone was playing songs I had never heard in my life.

 I couldn’t relate, I couldn’t engage, I had to smile the whole time because I need to be having fun right? Even when given the power to pick a song, to play a song I know that no one else can relate to would kill the vibe. There’s always this element of ‘you compromise not us’. At that same party a song with slurs was put on and there were yt folks singing at the top of their lungs. The other half were not or skipping the slurs when they show up and they thought that was enough. They thought not being racist themselves was enough. No one asked how I was doing because I have to be fine lmao. Anyways, that’s what it’s like to be in fandom where you can hardly find people that look like you or understand you experiences while everyone else is having fun. I’ve been sitting here wishing I could talk about specifics (I do have them) but unfortunately, I do not think that’s a good idea and the last thing I want is negative attention rn, so I’ll try to be as vague as possible. 

Plus people would hella disagree with me lmao. The safest example I can talk about isn’t even p5 specific, but I spoke about this with a friend on why Geto isn’t one of my favourite characters or more broadly why I don’t ship satosugu. I like Geto just fine mind you! I think he’s cool. And I think Satosugu is a great ship. However. I invite you whoever is reading this to imagine why I, a black person, may not exactly jive with a character whose favourite insult and dehumanizing phrasing is to call people he sees as beneath him as a monkey. I’ve never even touched satosugu fic lmfao because dear lord, I couldn’t in the manga and I wouldn’t willingly subject myself to that. 

Not saying it happens, but to be in character, I imagine it would lmao. And the same goes for Morgana! I saw a tweet the other day like “I don’t trust people who don’t like Morgana.” And I see this tweet like twice a week, (different people mind u) And every time I’m like, I simply did not enjoy Morgana calling Ryuji a monkey. It made me uncomfortable, (it’s not gonna make every black person uncomfortable but I know Plum was at least taken back by it) but to open up that discussion would make me look aggressive wouldn’t it? ESPECIALLY again, Ryuji is very black coded but I’m not touching that topic with a ten foot pole. People don’t really think too hard outside of their experiences and it’s alienating. Not to mention when I brought up a conversation about experiencing micro aggressions the overall response despite having a larger account at the time was silence and disappointment, by people I thought I was closer with than that too. 

It was a wake up call and I haven’t been able to feel right in the fandom since. Absolutely nothing would happen or something minor would happen (like Hazbin releasing a fucking Slurs shirt which thanks Viz. And this is coming from someone who laughed at the joke in the show because it was *just* the show) and it would dredge all this pain up all over again. Anyways, that’s my ramble, it sucks fandom is like this but I don’t see that ever changing because as I told Plum, bringing up race in their spaces is something yt folks do not like to do so

(https://retrospring.net/@CookieComics/a/112944476253264310)

[skybristle]

im jsut gonna shamelessly dump this from dms with mac idgaf

also been thinking abt how rays and sparks were friendss..................... The dynamic must've been sooo fun........... Sparks also probably knew reefs pretty well as its head technician. Can you imagine how much she would have had to trust it !!!!

mac: "God. to have to look back on all the good times knowing now that they'd BETRAY you like that. Sparks cant ever look at them the same even if she wanted to. She TRUSTED THEM!!! she let them into her most vulnerable parts, let them take care of her and tend to her structure!!! and they then went on to hurt her! that SUCKS. for all parties involved, but especially because of how much dependence sparks had on them...."

EXACTLYY !!! !ITS SO EVILLLL

Sure her trust breaks with ancients and her creators in general. But she really never has a personal realtionship again with anyone after the expansions. I wonder how much of reefs she sees in chimes. I wonder how much her skin crawls every time she sits through him talking about his ancients and city and his 'mama'.

i think thats why out of all of them sparks likes ochre the most despite flor being relatively quiet. she doesn't have that personal hurt with amber the way she does with reefs, since amber was long gone from her project by the time everything crumbled. even as chimes is so warm and friendly she just butts heads with him instinctually and really can't trust anyone, let alone reefs creation.

Of course that changes in off string and stuff where chimes and sparks relationship becomes Immensely important but in canon they're like. estranged.

they should be family. He should be like a little brother to her. He probably would have been had reefs just gone and built an iterator withotu all fo that happening. But that's not what ever would have happened

Rays tries to tell her about chimes construction [and ochres] as hes in development. as a late apology, as news, as whatever he frames it as in their tense conversations. but she just doesn't want to hear any of it anymore

mac: "She loses the people in her life who supported her the most, they betray her horribly, and she's expected to be able to trust people after that??? fuckkk no. And god,,,,, chimes. Chimes is so so close to reefs and. Sparks just has to. Watch that. FUCK"

ESPECIALLY WITH ALL THE POLITICAL DEVELOPMENTS IN CHORUS WHERE REEFS STRONGMANS SUCH A DIFFERENT CULTURE !!! ITS THE ENVY !!! WHY COULDNT HAVE THAT BEEN HER. HOW COULD REEFS SAY ALL THAT AND HAVE DONE WHAT IT DID TO HER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! STARTS EATING GLASS

i dont think she ever hated chimes or anything its just every interaction with him is so tainted and he'll never really understand why. I think thats also why him specifically turning on her and getting into a fight with her is what sends her over.

sparks would have never TOLD him that this is what she sees, that she's been hrut like this, because chimes is a new generation past her expansions and theres no need. she doesn't need to burden him with that beyond what he already knows. i think he would have really tried to make up for it had he known. But he doesn't and so he lives his happy life as sparks just. watches with frustration

which fucks me up about off string because in my head she DOES tell him. she DOES !! FUCK !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

haah sparks you get to grow and be a better person and escape without suciide but you have to have these hard conversations and you have to put yourself out there and you have to have faith that you won't be stabbed in the back haha sparks

mac: "she HAS to learn to trust others. Which sucks. She's been betrayed so hard in the past, but part of healing is accepting that you can learn to put your faith into people again!!! she has friends!!!!!! GAGDH"

i need her to like. Get her ass beat by something and chimes [who is VERY much a coward when it comes to combat] doesnt hesitate to go in there to grab her and pull her away. I needdd a million little things to pile up to shore up the initially stringy trust she's put in her group. I need them to become her friends i need her to get better !!! RIPS SHIRT OFF

boooo shed your godhood and live the human experience and do dumb shit. fucking lsoer

[coconox]

late night ramble but ig heres my 2 cents of this poll (not directly attaching this to the poll cause im a coward LOL)

ofc, i won't put my thoughts on luci/belphe/asmo. ik we get tidbits of them through their nobles or pb's prev games but i wanna judge them based on how they actually show up in-game. i also know there's prob gonna be some luci lore later when gamigin update is out (atm its like abt 4 or so days till that update's release) but i'll just omit my thoughts on luci for now

ok now for the rest of the kings:

i should also put a disclaimer that i don't read any of the unholy board stories unless if it's mammon's, so for the other kings that aren't mammon my opinions are purely based off of main story or event appearances or how they act in comics

satan - honestly pretty ok w him. i'm kinda biased when it comes to mc being recoginized as their own person rather than purely just the descendant of solomon so i like him based on that. idk i don't have any strong opinions abt him i just see him as a very fluffy cat :3

mammon - absolutely love him. 0 flaws. wins the idgaf war. my absolute fav squeak toy. lol ok but fr tho i don't really have any complaints abt him. will spoil tf out of mc and wants to ensure their safety. also sees mc as mc and was even kinda disgusted(? idk a better word for this💀💀) by the fact that a part of solomons soul can be sensed in them, almost as if he doesnt want it to be in the way of mc. also wasnt afraid to call out the fact that sitri kept calling mc solomon. and ofc the love at first sight thing is great too but also the bodyworship (or ig faceworship bc he only just kissed mc's entire face??) before the confession like UGH... absolutely weak for that man (devil?). idk i dont rlly see that many mammon fans rlly anywhere and it saddens me hes such a good char outside of just having huge tibbies. srsly tho pb pls we get it he has huge tits you dont need to constantly bring it up the char sprite is literally right in front of us-

cant wait for the next chapter w the big lore dump abt mammon and hope we finally get a pt 2 of his h scene (hopium)

no srsly he's the only king w 1 h scene, satan and levi got 2,, WHERE IS MAMMON'S PT 2

as a side comment also i love the silly banter btwn mammon and satan like they are truly besties from the cross on their foreheads to matching skill names to the amnt of times they throw hands and still hang out and care for each other

beel - hes ok ig? i think lore-wise hes gonna be one of the more interesting ones considering how "mysterious" he is i.e. constantly wandering, almost being an absent king. like what led to the constant wandering? what did andrealphus mean when he said beel is the key to ending the war? how does his cloning work? i kinda feel bad for bael and the other nobels needing to manage everything while beels away but i don't rlly hate him for it? at least not now considering we don't rlly know the definite reason and i want to assume the best and say he has a valid reason for being absent so he could protect his region. hate is a strong word ig its more of a slight dislike towards beel, but its like this 🤏 small of a dislike im still overall neutral abt him

levi - falling into the majority from the poll i have to agree that levi is my least fav king also lol. i get where he's coming from and why he acts the way he does, i just dont like how he's written? or ig moreso how he's written in the perspective of mc. tho tbh that's more of an mc issue than a levi issue, but i got pretty tired of the story constantly reminding us how pretty levi is (similar to how we always get reminded of how big mammon is/how huge mammons tits are). idk its like a gut feeling to not like/trust him. i also just don't really vibe w him in general even before we were actually introduced to him in main story. hes a good attacker gameplay-wise tho lol

so yeah, those are my thoughts for now. ofc they could change in the future when we get more info abt all of them but we'll see

[h5eavenly]

omg i literally sent you an ask like two hours ago thinking "well this can't get any worse now we're gonna be so up from here on" AND IT SOMEHOW GOT WORSE?????? AGAIN I DONT EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START WOAH yeji having it out for y/n over something that happened years ago and that hyune obviously got over is just soooo.. like she has so many reasons to give y/n a piece of her mind for and she chooses /this/ hill to die on?? AND not addressing her directly???? babyyyy this ain't it!! i think this is also a way of evidencing how distanced yeji and hyune have grown more than the distaste that she has towards y/n, like she doesn't know about hyune and her's connection and where they stand as much as the others do bc yeosang drove her away from them all which is so sad :-( sometimes she frustrates me a bit but i have a lot of sympathy towards yeji especially in this situation bc i know how hurtful it is to feel ostracised from your close friendships due to a toxic relationship and trying to hold on to the things you knew about them while not realising that they've changed bc you haven't been there enough to witness those changes :-( idk if this was your intention when you wrote it but it's really accurate. i know there's a lot of bad blood between yeji and y/n, now more than ever with the yeosang situation 💀 but i really do wish they can have a heart to heart sometime bc both of them have been so wronged and hurt by evil men and idk if a friendship between them is possible tbh but i feel like they can find a support system in each other even if they aren't friends. i just want my girls to be happy and i know there's a long way to go but they both deserve healing smsm :-(

now WDYM MFS RAIDED HYUNE'S HOUSE OH MY GOD????? this is y/n's fuckass father FOR SURE his ass wants to play gangster so bad HE AIN'T SHIT!!!!!!! i'm so flabbergasted i swear i never saw this coming??? i never thought that bum would ever go to this length to try to impose control on his daughter like that man's crazyyyyy. at first i thought the raid was bc of yeosang but you know that man ain't got no friends and is a coward he could never pull up like this 😭 so that's why i think it's y/n's father who's behind this bc he wants to have his godfather moment for some reason 💀 yk how weird men go crazy once they realise they can't control the women they feel entitled to so i think y/n moving out made him feel some kind of way. i can't wait for that asshole's downfall i swear i'm praying on it im going to church over it im manifesting it 🙏🏻 unless hyune is onto something that we're not aware of??? which idk im not sure about that honestly but i didn't see like half the things that ended up happening coming either so you knowww im seated, hyune and hannie living with y/n will be so cute too!! we love to see domestic hyune+y/n content we used to pray for times like this 🥹 so we might be kinda up after all maybe

thank you sm for the update so soon!! you're working overtime for this and it's sooo appreciated you deserve the world fr 🫂🩷🩷

genuinely curious what made you think "its only up from here" cus... 🫡efuhhfihw fyi anon i take my angst tag VERY seriously 🧐 some may say i'm not trust worthy but i just like being unpredictable

about the whole yeji situation it is intentional yes! im so glad you noticed its kinda hard to write such subtle things in smau without it being in your face because it's one of those things that i want ppl to notice but sometimes im like ahh idk if anyone would notice, i think for her she obviously views y/n as a rival but because she's left out (hence jinnie growing more distance ever since yeo came into her life) she tries to attack y/n with the only available card she has which is "you did smth bad to my friend" bc she doesn't know anything else and she wasn't even there when it all happened she only got snippets from the story and from jinnie's side when he was still feeling resentful towards y/n and you see the difference in this specific subject between her and lix (bc lix was there) he gets their bond sm more and it's so much easier for him to not hold it against y/n

listen y/n's dad might be a little worse than her mom idk they're competing for that title rn, ty for being so kind baby as alwayys i enjoyed reading and im sorry for talking sm i just get excited about my characters🥰🥰💞💞

[ase-trollplays]

--chronicallyMousy [CM] began trolling sandstormHuntress [SH]--

--chronicallyMousy [CM] began trolling sandstormHuntress [SH]--

CM: ...hello corali... (//:3 ...how have you been?...

SH: Eh, I been better, I guess. Some fucking

SH: Coward ass chicken shit's been leaving threats at my hive.

CM: ...what???...

SH: It ain't nothing to worry about. I ain't scared a nobody that can't threaten me to my face. Little annoying notes ain't gonna intimidate me none.

CM: ...corali... maybe you s-should take this s-seriously... ...did you upset or hurt anyone recently?...

SH: Just the usual rowdy drunks at the Jackhammer and the troll whose arm I snapped in half a perigee back for stabbing me.

CM: ...do you think its him?... )//:3

SH: Unless he wants me to snap every bone in his body, it better not be.

SH: He's been banned from the bar, and I ain't seen him since then.

SH: Fucker knows he can't take me in a fight, so he's trying to scare me.

CM: ...do you think a legislacerator might help you?...

SH: Are y'all kidding? Legis don't give a shit about lowbloods unless they're arresting, beating, or putting us on trial.

SH: I might as well ask my pa for help for all the good a legi will do.

CM: ...i just dont want you getting hurt... ...what if they escalate things?... ...if they already know where you live... and your hive isnt that easy to find or get to... imagine what else they must know... D//:3

SH: Don't y'all worry your pretty little head. There ain't a troll on Alternia that can scare me. You've seen your mate, and you know me and him go at it like pit fighters and he ain't killed or seriously hurt me yet aside from the occasional broken bone.

CM: ...but danny fights fair... ...whoever this is probably wont... and you might get killed or worse!...

SH: I'm telling y'all it's fine. Everything's gonna be fine.

CM: ... )//':3

SH: Ah come on, don't make little crying faces at me.

SH: It's

SH: Fine.

SH: I promise on my sobriety I can handle whatever the fuck's going on.

CM: ...just call me and check in every night for the next perigee... ...if i dont hear from you... im coming out there...

SH: Alright, if it'll make you feel better, fine. Expect to hear from me tomorrow.

CM: ...thank you... (//:3

CM: ...have you told darius?...

SH: Of course not. She's got better things to worry about, like her dress shop.

CM: ...darius is using s-she/her again?...

SH: Yeah, says it feels "right." Whatever, I ain't gonna judge her. She's my kiddo no matter what she calls herself.

CM: ...im trying to think of how to better explain gender to varoll... ...s-she only knows about cisgender boys and girls...

CM: ...and i told her that s-sometimes boys and girls look different than you expect... and s-someone you think is a boy is really a girl... and vice versa...

CM: ...but im not s-sure how to explain people that are transgender... or arent a binary gender at all...

SH: Eh, you're overthinking it. Kids will take whatever you tell them pretty much at face value.

CM: ...varoll isnt like that... though... ...not at her age... ...s-she wants to know everything in detail... and all the hows and whys...

CM: ...if i tell her that s-some people are just 'like that'... s-she might not accept that as an answer...

CM: ...but i dont know any other way to explain other genders to her...

SH: Dar's genderweird. Just scoot Varoll her way.

SH: Get her answers right from the hoofbeast's mouth. She's the one who taught me all this gender shit in the first place.

SH: I ain't gonna say I'm an expert, but I know enough. I'm sure she'd love to talk about it.

CM: ...are you s-sure?... ...i dont want to put that on her and make her feel like s-she has to...

SH: Trust me, Dar'll leap at the chance.

CM: ...okay... ...it would be a really big help...

CM: ...hows work?...

SH: Same shit different night.

SH: Throwing out people starting fights or getting handsy or giving the bartender a little too much lip.

CM: ...i really wish you would work s-somewhere else... ...im worried with you constantly being around alcohol and people drinking...

SH: Have some faith in me. It's been, what.

SH: Seven perigees now since I quit? And I haven't had a drop. I'm still going to AA, and I got you and Dar and Arri for support.

SH: Ain't nothing gonna make me blow this.

SH: I invite the universe to fucking try it. Can't be done.

CM: ...please dont tempt the universe... D//:3

SH: Y'all know I'm just messing. ;)

SH: Anyw

CM: ...corali?...

--sandstormHuntress [SH] is an idle chum--

CM: ...im going to call you...

--chronicallyMousy [CM] gave up trolling sandstormHuntress [SH]--

[sanchoyo]

tangentially related to last text post, but kept separate bc its LONG WINDED about nothing Really, sapote is by far the funniest to just throw at other charas bc of how well she simply Rolls With The Punches. Commits to the Bit. shes a loud, funny extrovert and inflicts psychic damage on everyone's brain cells (affectionate) just by being in their proximity fr.

-her and persimmon grew up together right? like theyre cousins, and they have that dynamic of 'ohh its bully on SIGHT TARGET SPOTTED (COMING IN FOR THE ELBOW DROP)' 'NO NO GET AWAY LEAVE ME ALONE YOU FREAK' energy that comes with having older cousins (or is. that just me having a million cousins myself. sajdfsdf) shes. actually really surprised persimmon made the effort to come to earth, that shes NOT on the same side as her, and does take it a liiiitle personally and get her feelings hurt. but not enough to NOT still fight her on sight. this is not a NEW thing for them. like before leaving their planet it was still 'ohoho i see persims. going to run full speed at her and headbutt her' energy but now its just. ramped up in intensity yk.

-her and mira have the worlds longest contest of being committed to the Bit. the Bit in this case being sapote pretending to Get everything mira says and 'yes and'ing her to death. sapote really DOES love miras attitude and thinks shes sooo funny with how eager she is, and mira is just devastated sapote is being so patronizing and not taking her seriously. but like. mira commits SO hard to the aesthetic of Being a Magical girl and gets meta about it, and sapote will just. in turn match that energy and commit super hard to being a hammy cartoon villain complete with campy little outfits and speeches bc shes a messy improv theater girlie and this makes mira SOOO HAPPY. they play off each others energy SO well if its just the two of them that show up to a fight theyll just monologue at each other for 3 hours then leave w/out throwing hands at all

-sapote is Reasonably Sort Of Frightened by Aqua and Machines In General. but also sapote is one of the few ppl who CAN stand to fight aqua without experiencing Immediate Death, which is Great! she ends up fighting her 90% of the time her and cara go to earth, because, cara is Small and Sapote's Responsibility, and we cant let Mrs Murderbot over here Hurt Our Little Cara :( (aqua is asking sapote very sweetly to stop fighting during all of this btw. and sapote is like NUH UH IM NOT falling for these ALGORITHM TRICKS i KNOW as SOON as we surrender (which we will not do bc we r not COWARDS) u will Terminator Us. and aquas like omg no i wont :( btw how do u know terminator movies :( on aquas side its very much her not understanding sapote, her jokes or her mannerisms at all and also being a Little Nervous around her. the mutual 'you kind of freak me out' solidarity they could have...

-cara and sapote are THEE starting duo. for reference cara is, to sapote, a small angry teenage girl who trembles like a chihuahua and should Not Be Here, but Queen Trusted her with cara so she HAS to keep an eye on her. like. this is HER little buddy and she takes this responsibility VERY seriously. overbearingly so. sapote is, a 20s something year old disaster who by all accounts has a low sense of self preservation, NO respect for authority, or sense for whats too Far sometimes. and yet. and YET. in her mind shes like. yeah im gonna be the BEST role model :) for this teenager :) ever :)

but inwardly shes a little offput by cara. in the sense that she…worries why shes here, yknow, bc shes young, shes here on the ship ALONE with no other humans, and cara is SO closed off, QUEEN knows why cara wants to be here supposedly, and she okayed it, so sapote should trust her and not push too hard or she could scare cara into being even more emotionally closed off!!! sapote hashes out The Jokes but genuinely. is trying. very hard to get cara to LIKE her and to TALK to her (unfortunately this freaks cara out and she clams up even harder ajkdfhkj but the effort should count for something. to her credit sapote never had an angsty phase she was always the class clown when she was caras age so she has NO frame of reference but by god is she TRYING. via taking cara on fun little Villain Sprees, but STILLLL.)

cara is also inadvertently the reason sapote starts learning a lot more abt earth and its cultures bc shes trying SO dang hard to connect to her and thinks this will help. but then looking from caras side, at her Inner Thoughts its like oh :( :( [REDACTED FOR SPOILERS] just. the two of them forced to have an honest convo is so HARD bc of how much cara closes herself off ESPECIALLY from sapote, and how much shes not afraid to be a bit mean and play the 'youre being overbearing leave me ALONE' card to sapote, who wants to be the Cool Fun Alien Cara can Trust :") she wants to have fun and joke around with cara, but ironically the human she ends up being able to do that with more is?? mira??? which is. funny in a horrible way. because They Are Not On The Same Side…she wants the human on Her Side to Feel Safe and Confide In Her More :( i need them locked in a room for hours untl cara TALKS. please (and this is a Thing I can Do since They Are My Ocs. will I? well. :) )

-Queen and sapote...u wouldnt THINK they would get along bc Queen seems So Proper and Polite and Sapote has NO filter and is rowdy and obnoxious, but. the second sapote enters a room queen perks up a little, her eyes light up, and shes Speed Walking over to her after excusing herself from whatever convo she was trapped in to get the Gossip. shes one of the few ppl queen actually relaxes around and confides in aside from Arilla, which speaks volumes about sapote (and is something cara constantly is BAFFLED by, and if u ask queen shes like uhhm no I dont play favorites of course not <3 I treat all u the same <3 but sapote actually does make her Laugh which is Much Needed to put it very lightly so.) meanwhile sapote sees Queens right hand man Arilla and IMMEDIATELY also starts picking on him and queen wont help bc she thinks its kind of Funny Too even if she wont Laugh Out Loud at him bc that would be ~mean~ </3 sapote is stealing this poor mans glasses and calling him twiggy and messing up his HAIR please help him.

anyway. its also just really fun throwing Sapote Into Situations with other characters because like. she is an adult in a magical girl series where the main charas NEED adult guidance and wisdom sometimes! but she doesnt have that. because shes a disaster 20s girlie. but god does she Feel that age difference a lot of the time. sooo much silly teenage drama shes rolling her eyes about and laughing over. and then theres Adultier Adults in the series, who are in their late 30s and 40s and 50s and having her interact with them is where things get REALLY fun.

she contains multitudes shes street smart and socially smart and an extrovert and a funnygirl and a cringefail girl and the Most Worst Disaster youve ever seen and makes HORRIBLE choices and lives off junk food and beer and is fighting ILL and still bodying people and one of Queens many meowmeow warriors but wiggled up to the top ranks by being SUPER meowmeow. and is having a GREAT time doing it. and she still loves her famiwy vewy much mwawh. and comes back to the ship to run to her sister in the daycare and throw gifts from earth to the alien kids. which is nice. but she totally stole those. because she contains multitudes. she HAS the range. shes kind of blorbo shaped, but also kind of tumblr sexyman shaped. i cannot elaborate further.

also sapote is way taller than all of them so she just. leans on them. looms. t poses. that meme of the guy floating scarily in the hallway after someone else. thats her 😌

[froggo-tea]

OK OK IM THINKING- (Big ramble coming ahead, also there might be some grammar mistakes lol, you've been warned)

I’m analyzing PK’s relationship with Hornet cuz they aren’t talked about that much-

In my mind there are like two main ways on how Pk could’ve been towards Hornet:

Either he was a good father that cared or he was a piece of shit

If he was indeed a good father then he probably loved her a lot. Hornet was like a big priority for him and he cared for her, he worried for her safety, because of that Hornet probably saw him as like the hero of the story. She exaggerated her thoughts on how good PK actually was and justified every decision he took because “he’s the good guy he wouldn’t hurt anyone” and cuz “everything he does is for her sake and the sake of the kingdom”, this big love she had for him made him seem like the greatest guy she has ever met and she was putting him in a pedestal. It wasn’t until she met PV that some doubt on her innocent like 4 year old mind started to crawl inside (personally I think PK created the dreamers before the hollow knight was elected, so hornet was born before PV). 

PV looked just like her, a little kid who didn’t know anything, but that wasn’t true, PV was a vessel to be used against the infection, someone who was doomed ever since they were born, that is why Hornet probably started to doubt her father yet she chose to ignore those thoughts assuring that her father was doing this for the best. So she treated PV as a sibling, she hated how everyone else referred to them as an object because for her they were more than that, Hornet loved her sibling and it hurt her a lot to loose them and her mother.

When PV was sealed, no body told her what was actually happening, her mother lied to protect her so she wouldn’t suffer. Of course she did suffer but a little bit of hope still lingered in her mind, hope that her mother and her sibling would come back and give her the biggest hug she has ever had. I like to think that the failure of the vessel plan took some years to happen, when hornet was a pre-teen maybe, so when she turned 11 her father told her everything as the infection started to rise again. Aghh I imagine Hornet’s heart shattering in pieces as she knew that every single person who she loved lied to her, she ran from the palace and hid in deepnest. That is were all her trust issues came in, Hornet adored her father yet she slowly started to realize that he wasn’t the man she thought he was, she thought he was kind and brave but when she went back to the white palace to see nothing, she understood. No, her father wasn’t the hero in the story, there are no heroes in real life, her father was just a king who did the most horrible things he could to protect a kingdom that was doomed from the start. He lied to her, he used her sibling in the most disgusting way possible, destroying them and making them play the role of an empty vessel without any thought, he killed millions of his own children, millions of her own siblings, he took her mother away from her for a plan that was never meant to work. Hr was a coward, specially since he went to hide in his palace in the dream realm, not falling by the side of his kingdom. That is when the cruel reality struck her, she was stupid and naive to trust in such man, to love him and justify his actions with lies.

Now I don’t want to make PK the bad guy here cuz I’m a little bit of a PK apologist so I will say that he did all of this cuz he ain’t got the best mental health and his sanity was long gone, but he did care for Hornet, he loved her and wanted what was best for her. When hornet ran away his heart also broke, Hornet was not the only one to loose every person she loved, Pk also lost the people he cared for her (his children, his wife, Lurie- cough*), so he hid cuz he was ashamed of himself. 

But if we do take a look on the other way I said, well he was more selfish and had a bigger ego- still without sanity tho lol-

Gonna analyze that on another day tho I’m tired of thinking

Also the songs "Rät" by Penelope Scott and "Would've, Could've, Should've" by Taylor Swift inspired this :)

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

ohgghh i’m on the season finale. mind if i liveblog in ur inbox?? i’m doing it

this is already fucking insane. i have no idea whose side will is on. he’s giving information to both jack and hannibal before they meet for dinner. what is he doing. WHAT IS HIS PLAN

god i love freddie lounds. have i mentioned that?? i love her. morally fucked up women my beloved <3 she makes the narrative so interesting

hannibal is literally asking will to run away with him. my god. how much fucking gayer can this get. they need to make out sloppy style covered in blood right now immediately

HERE COMES JACK THIS WAS THE SCENE WE SAW RIGHT AT THE BEGINNING OF THE SEASON ISN’T IT??? OHHH HELL YEAH BABEY IT’S THE FIGHT SCENE HEHEHEHE

ALANA’S HERE ALANA’S HERE AAAAAAA GIRLIE RUN ohhhhhh no jack is bleeding from the neck oh no oh no i don’t want him dead please no :( ALANA OH NO. OH NO SHE HAS NO BULLETS. OH NO GIRL RUNNNNN oh she found more oh thank god

ABIGAIL???????

WHAT THE FUCK

SHE PUSHED ALANA OUT THE WINDOW

alana don’t die noooo no no no :( i love her i don’t want her dead!!! oh god jack is probs dying too NOOOOOOOO

omg will saw abigail,,,,,, sobbing. wailing even. screaming and crying.

“we couldn’t leave without you” okay. gayass. my heart is already shattered what the fuck am i supposed to do about this

tenderly touching the side of will’s face. dude come on

HE STABBED HIM HE STABBED HIM OH MY GOD. WHAT THE FUCK

“do you believe you could change me the way i changed you?” “i already did” OKAY. ALRIGHT. I’LL JUST SIT WITH THIS NOW. WHAT THE HELL DUDE

HE’S KILLING ABIGAIL FOR REAL. DUDE. ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS. yeah no way everyone here is surviving this. oh fuck oh fuck jack is totally dead oh fuck ok time to cry. he called his wife in his last moments. stop. i’ve cried over bella twice before i don’t need to again ok

HANNIBAL AND HIS THERAPIST ARE JUST FUCKING OFF TO SOMEWHERE ELSE?? THAT’S THE WAY THE SEASON ENDS????? MAC WHAT THE HELL MAN

^ME RN. MY GOD. I DON’T KNOW HOW MANY OF THEM SURVIVED THAT BUT HOLY SHIT I DON’T HAVE THE TIME OR ENERGY TO START S3 RIGHT NOW. UHHHH THOUGHTS: IT GOT VERY GAY VERY QUICKLY. GENUINELY THOUGHT THEY WERE GONNA KISS AT MULTIPLE POINTS AND THE WRITERS WERE COWARDS FOR NOT LETTING THEM MAKE OUT SLOPPY STYLE COVERED IN BLOOD. VERY GLAD FREDDIE IS ALIVE GASLIGHT GATEKEEP GIRLBOSS <3 FIGURED ABIGAIL WASN’T DEAD BUT WAS STILL SURPRISED BY HER SHOWING UP. WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED. 10/10 I’M GOING TO GO TO BED NOW

AHAHAHHAAAA HOLY SHIT. WELCOME TO MY WORLD. WELCOME TO MY TWISTED MIND, IM A TWISTED FUCKING CYCLE PATH BECAUSE OF HANNIBAL S2 FINALE

"you were supposed to leave." "we couldnt leave without you". will run away with me. will we can escape but only if we do it together. unfortunately i cannot trust you and you cannot trust me. we work perfectly together and thats exactly why we can never work together. the way he fucking.. caresses wills face before he stabs him and then immediately just.. holds him. girls when they say they want to be held (me im girls). "DO YOU BELIEVE YOU COULD CHANGE ME THE WAY I CHANGED YOU" "I ALREADY DID" WHSIKEY CAN YOU HEAR ME . CAN YOU FUCKING HEAR ME. THEY SHOULD HAE MADE OUT SPLOPPY STYLE. "you would deny me my life?" "no no no" "my freedom, then? confine me to a prison cell?" << this dialogue. ugh. ughghghghghghhghghhghhgh. man what the fucj. im literally always thinking about hannibal season 2 finale. any time i need to do a factory reset on my brain i pull up my favorite youtube video conveniently titled "hannibal stabs will scene". fellas is it gay to gut another man like a fish. (the answer is yes)

[flovverworks]

I LOVVEEEE CHAPTER 7 GAAAHHHHHHH

Bradley: Get this straight, Sage. We are wizards. Our lives are far longer than yours, and our strength far greater. The final decision may be yours, but we made our own call to follow you. And if the plan fails, it won’t be on you.

Bradley: Listen up, Akira. We get to decide how we want to live. We’ve made the choice to trust you from our own hearts. "Akira would never make a bad decision." None of us here think or expect that from you. If anything, we’ll gladly mess up, if it’s with you. That’s why we’re all here. Are we clear now?

Bradley: Good. Now you can stop trying to read our expressions with fear in your eyes. Don’t treat us like cowards who can only whine without making their own decisions. We have our pride. It’s offensive and infuriating to be treated like petty lowlifes. Give us a reason to be proud. If you treat us like we’re the best of the best, we’ll show you what we’re capable of. When I say best of the best, I’m not asking for rewards. I’m talking about a sense of worth — trust is a form of worth. And it can only come from you. Don’t tell us what to do while dragging your feet and apologizing. If you’re gonna entrust us with assignments, hand them out like they’re the finest jewels. Make us proud to call ourselves your subordinates. Everyone wants a role that grants them a sense of worth. And a leader’s role is to give that worth to the people who devote themselves to you. Got it?

T_______T anytime bradley talks about the sage stuff i,,...give us worth...the sage's heart....mannn i love bradley so much...ive talked about him on & on since ive read these parts, its just...augyh brad...ill collect my thoughts again once im at the sage's heart part...man faust in this part too...............akiras feelings towards handing out the journals, feeling guilty about giving them the position as leader knowing that leadership is a difficult and thankless role and you have to carry the blame if things go wrong.....akiras whos ready for silence, but cain says he's proud akira's relying on him, rustica & figaro who also responds immediately...........'i will do my utmost, but do not trust me' faust.............i love this ch so much man

HELL HELL HELL HELL HELL HELL HELL HELL