#i want to put them in a meat grinder and make cheeseburgers out of them

[festering-bacteria]

jfkonfucius brainrot.,.they r so real and canon

[astralikacastle]

For some reason, I feel like replicating the list based on my own experiences, which are admittedly quite limited.

When you're ordering a sandwich at Subway, you're getting a sandwich built-to-order at the little sandwich bar behind the glass, rather than simply from a cash register waiting for the folks in the back to make it. This means you're describing the sandwich in order of operations, as they make it, rather than having a sort of baseline construction you might describe modifications to (e.g. Double Cheeseburger, No Pickles, Extra Ketchup.)

This doesn't mean there aren't baselines to work from. If you're simply ordering a Sandwich, the beginning of your order is a combination of Three Parts: How Long the Sandwich Is (there's only 2 options here, six inch or footlong, which determines whether they use a whole loaf of bread or half of one), The Kind Of Sandwich (which mostly just covers the meats (e.g. A Subway Club is Turkey, Ham, and Beef, a Spicy Italian is pepperoni and salami), and the Kind of Bread (e.g. Wheat, flatbread, Italian (white) or one of the kinds with stuff on top, like Monterey Cheddar, or Herbs and Cheese). Example starter here, they ask the usual "What can I get you," I'd normally start out, "Yeah I'd like a footlong Subway Club on Italian Herbs and Cheese," and since I'm only getting the one sandwich, I choose to stop there. If you're getting more than one sandwich, you usually want to get all of your bases described at the same time, so that all the sandwiches are being assembled at the same time.

At this point, the person working there will get the bread set up for their sandwiches, and will usually ask as they put the meats on what kind of cheese you want. Usually it's American or Cheddar, sometimes they have Swiss. Obviously, if you're unsure what cheeses they have just by looking, ask "What kinds of cheese do you have?" This is also the point at which you can ask for bacon, if you'd like. There might be other addons at this step, but bacon's the big one. It costs a little extra, but if you like bacon on your sandwich, it's worth it, IMO.

Once they finish the meat and cheese assembly, they'll ask if you want your sandwich toasted. This gets the meat warm and the cheese nice and melty - usually both of these are chilled. Thankfully, this is just a very simple "Yes" or "No". If you get it toasted, you'll hafta wait a few seconds, but if you don't, you move quickly to

The Veggies step. On busier days you may end up with a new person at this step, as the person from the first half Admittedly, as I do not get most any toppings, I am less familiar with the variety they have, though again, there's a clear pane so you can see what toppings are available. Just ask for each topping, letting the person making your sandwich get towards the end of that step before asking for the next one. Veggies come first, then

The Sauces and Seasonings step. Same as above, though this is a tad quicker per beat, and most folks only get one sauce and/or one seasoning. This is another step where it doesn't hurt to ask what's available, since the bottles, shakers, and grinders aren't always clearly labeled or obvious in their contents.

At this point, your sandwich is done! They'll start wrapping it up in their paper wraps, and the person working the cash register will ask if it's just the sandwich or if you want chips and a drink. You can also get a cookie - I haven't had their cookies in a while but I remember them being pretty alright. Simply say yes or no, or state what extras you want, and then pay as you would at any other fast food register. (If you need instructions for that step this is unfortunately not the guide for that.)

And that's pretty much it! Ordering some of the other foods on their menu are pretty similar (even the salads, I believe!)

[islesblogger]

Islanders: From Snow's Steak Chalet to Lou's Burger Barn

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It’s February 13th 2019, and the NY Islanders are in first place in the Metro. How did we get here, what do burgers have to do with it, and what does that mean in terms of where are we going?

Prime Cuts

What are we gonna be?

I look at this as a process that began in June of 2008. That’s when Garth Snow started building a steakhouse out of what was a LI Diner. Garth didn’t have the budget or the staff to support the expansive menu of a classic dinner, whose biggest attraction is giving everybody in the most eclectic party of 10 a menu choice. He was going to focus on the three things that make a great steakhouse; steak/offensive talent, wine/defensive talent and service/goaltending. He was going to have to do this all through the draft, because in that period, and through his whole tenure he had very limited access to quality UFAs. Maybe the best UFA he signed from outside the organization was the bottle of Mark Streit vintage 2008.

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Building A Franchise Without A Building

He was given 10 years to build a clientele. There was some success, but even though he had some very good years of fine aged beef, he was never able to accumulate a top notch wine list and a four star staff. By the time the wine was ready, his beef distributor was failing to deliver, and staff was harder to keep, and keep happy every year.

Plated

This could best be exemplified by the 2015-18 seasons. In 15-16 they had just about everything working. He had added a decent wine list with Leddy and Boychuk with affordable bottles of deHaan and Hickey. Their beef was coming into their own with Tavares, Okposo, Bailey, Lee and Nielsen topping the menu selections… and when their head waiter went out for a smoke, Thomas Greiss made sure that all the entree’s were served accurately and hot.

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The Terrible Twos

It’s hard to keep that going. In 2016-17 they lost a good portion of their aged beef in Okposo, Nielsen, and Matt Martin. By the time they fixed most of the problems that caused the head chef was let go. A little kick in the pants and some freeing up of some offensive aggressiveness got them to within a point of the playoffs. Maybe the worst thing that could have happened.

Manual Transition

In 2017-18 the former sous chef was handed the kitchen… good lord was that a mistake. It was fine as long as everything remained the same, but the whole place became a nightmare as soon as the first problem arose… and there were plenty of secondary problems to follow. It was time to end the dream of having a Ruth’s Chris franchise.

The Meat Grinder

The one thing a good restaurateur knows is how to take inventory, find a market, and make corrections before they lose their business.

Now Hiring

The first thing they did was hire a new manager, Lou Lamoriello. Lou said, “we are not a steak house… and I don’t want to be a steak house”. Lou had built one of the better burger joints in the northeast, and he knew that Snow had accumulated enough beef to make it work.

Burger Meister, Meister Burger

Lou then replaced his chef with a guy who knew burgers, and how to put together a top notch burger menu. The biggest transition was trading in a few cases of wine, for six taps of the finest craft beer.

Classes Starting In October

Then it was time to prepare the staff. If you have the right menu, servicing the customer is basically about making sure everything is delivered correctly, hot, and with the proper attitude. Mitch Korn and the Piero Greco may be the best trainers in the business.

When it was time for Lou to re-stock he didn’t look for the most expensive prime beef, he went out and got the best burger cuts money could buy.

USDA Prime Chuck

You wouldn’t find Komarov, Filppula and Kuhnhackl on the menu at Morton’s. They were staples at Lou’s Burger Barn. These were guys you could stuff with assorted cheeses and wrap with bacon and make world class burgers. They were easy to prepare, and they would pair nicely with the beer inventory you had, and you were building.

Stake And Shake

Lou first previewed this new direction in October to mixed reviews. Most of the folks who had gotten used to the decent steaks rejected a burger platform. In fact, pub food made some point their nose in the air and walk away.

Not for long. Nobody can resist the smell of a good bacon double cheeseburger with some jalapeno washed down with a tasty lager and served by two vets who know how to keep the customer happy. Well maybe a vegan… but those kinda people ate in Manhattan anyway.

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Winner Winner Wimpy’s Dinner

So here we are. It’s February and we have the best burger joint in the league. What do we add to the menu?

I don’t think we want to start serving filet mignon (Duchene/Panarin). How about a nice shaved ribeye (Jeff Skinner), or a keg of Carolina Stout (Justin Faulk).

It may be more important to keep the meat distributor happy by signing Lee, Nelson and Eberle. There is also the fact that one of your waiters is making minimum wage. These are the things that need to be addressed to keep Lou’s Burger Barn in business for a few more years.

I have a feeling Lou’s is finally pointed in the right direction. The inventory has transitioned well. The guy is out there looking for new meat and ales are doing a fine job, and the wait staff under proper training seems to be in great shape.

I’ll take a Killer Bee burger (Jalepeno stinger and a touch of honey BBQ sauce), with a tall (25oz) Toews IPA  Mr. Lehner if you please.

*  Sorry Mike. You gotta beLIeve, but I gotta be me.

Islanders: From Snow’s Steak Chalet to Lou’s Burger Barn was originally published on islesblogger.com

[ecotone99]

[SP] (First post!) Found a fantasy sort-of story from 5 years ago... Should I try continuing?

There is a room. There is a scream. I can hear it on the other side of the door, a big wail of a scream that can only come from someone who would rather put each of their limbs through a meat grinder, attached, than endure that kind of pain. I know what is coming; I have seen it before. People would be rescued from the Square and come here to be mentally evaluated and physically examined before being released back to society; or so they thought. I know this because I have been here so long I have named the specks of dirt on the wall - Becky is my favourite because she has nice hair.

The scream doesn’t dissipate but instead grows more intense. Damn, she’s really getting the full treatment. Most people that are returned from the Square don’t have many limbs to speak of because they are torn off by the Reapers. You’d think that if they wanted to keep the entertainment going they would try to keep the remaining Nephilim fodder alive.

I'm jealous of the source of the screams though - not many Nephilim still have mouths because they are deemed “vestigial”. All my room has is an IV drip; inhuman beings don’t need human niceties and besides, who misses cheeseburgers anyway? Totally not me, of course.

As soon as I start up my usual conversation about cheeseburgers with Becky I can hear the click clack of heels. She’s baaack, I trill in my mind. I think today I’ll be a tiger. As she nears my cell I crouch and stalk towards the door. When the clicks stop I launch myself at the window as I feel my well worn muscles spring and she collapses to the floor; best part of the day.

Stiff and sentry-like, the guards enter and chain me to the spot on the wall covered in claw marks - sometimes I get too much into my cat act. I nod a hello to them as per usual but of course no mouth equals no response. I still think I’m going to get a nod back. The heeled woman follows them in through the small doorway and now comes the worst part of my day.

“Good morning, Seraphina. I hope you’re well because, as you know, we have the eight-hour marathon starting at 10 and I cannot have my champion going off to Heaven now can we?” She laughs an I-own-you-but-you-should-laugh-anyway kind of laugh - she says the same derogatory joke daily. I’d rather die than listen to her dribble but the fact that she’s talking means I’m closer to my opportunity. This marathon will guarantee my death - my ticket to release. I hate that joke but today it becomes ironic - I will finally be rid of her.

She’s still talking but I've tuned out her shrill voice as I’m being dragged down the hall by the guards - why would I want to make it easier for them? I float down the river lazily, hearing the gushes of water crashing into the rocks and the glacial water permeating my back until I shiver in pain and pleasure. The river twists and turns and now I hear the buzz of bees as they bounce from lily to lily - gathering sweet nectar for the honey I ache to taste on my tongue. Buzz, buzz, buzz. There’s a voice that tells me to shut up and suddenly there’s a much louder buzz as I float gently away.

My river dries up momentarily and now I stand in the launch room, shuffling my feet and bouncing on them; anxious to kill and anxious to die. I can see the remains of my fallen Nephilim brethren and all I can be is envious. I’m too strong for my own good.

The screen above the loading bay displays the last of the commercials for the Alliance and a timer with only five minutes remaining. As I feel the familiar grip and weight of my signature double bladed staff I cannot help that my eyes light up with a fury. I will kill all the Reapers today; I will not hold back anymore. My grip tightens on the staff until my claws break my skin.

“Remember Seraphina, you will not die. I do not care if I have to hybridize you like a mutt.” Heel Lady sneers at me and I am placed behind the gate too soon - the tiger in me roars with disgust and I have to agree.

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[salutethepig]

A Brock-burger

This; just this. By @hseanbrock

Ladeeeeez & gennnelmun, allow me to present to you. The one. The only <long, tense drum roll please>…

…The Husk Cheeseburger.

Yes, I know. Every person and their canine has written about this. And some time ago at that. It’s not exactly the latest news. But so what? Two reasons I’m posting this (a) it’s still a great recipe and (b) it speaks to the care shown by Brock and other chefs in continually tuning and re-tuning recipes and how they present on the plate.

  And unless you’re just microwaving shop bought ready meals all the time, there’s something to learn in here for everyone who cooks, small or large, often or not so. And that’s me. I know, ‘cos Val told me so 🙂

We start off with the man himself running through his methodology:

And then describing his thinking process to Eater:

OK, broken down via these diagram numbers:

1. The Bun

The Husk bun is all about squish. Brock decided on the house-made buttermilk and benne seed bun because it stayed moist and soft, even after toasting gave it a good crunch. The sliced buns get a spread of butter and beef fat and then are griddled. One of the secrets of the Husk bun is that before all that happens, the bun is steamed. Steaming is a recent development in the prep which Brock says lends “industrial squishiness to a handmade bun.” The bun is also critical to the burger’s structural integrity. It readily soaks up juices, but doesn’t fall apart.

2. The Patties

The two Benton’s bacon-infused patties on the Husk cheeseburger have become burger legend. While Brock used to use a ribeye-brisket-chuck blend, he has recently switched purveyors and is now using 100% chuck. Brock sears the patties on a Keating griddle, which is nonstick and incredibly hot. The heat gives the burgers their crust, and when the burgers are finished they are scraped off the griddle “diner style.”

Brock’s inspiration in grinding hickory-smoked Benton’s bacon into the beef came from a frustration he had with that seemingly inevitable moment when the bacon strip falls off the burger. Not only did that “wrestling” annoy Brock, but it left the flavor balance of the burger off. Brock went with the supremely smokey Benton’s because he wanted the elemental Southern flavors of wood, charcoal, and smoke in his burger. Cooking the burger over charcoal wouldn’t create the crust he was looking for, so Brock opted to add smokiness with bacon. Roughly 5% of the total mass of the patties is bacon.

3. The Cheese

There is only one rule at Husk: No other cheeses besides American cheese will ever be served on the cheeseburger. Ever. Brock picked American cheese for its meltability. Because the product is basically a milk gel, Brock explains, it melts into a “goo” that no other cheese can match. The three slices of gooey cheese grab onto the patties without falling off into a liquid, which appeals to Brock’s sense of burger structure. Brock also says the flavor of American cheese reminds him of being a kid, which is part of what makes his burger comfort food.

4. The Toppings

As with every element of the Husk cheeseburger, the toppings contribute to sound burger structure. White onions are shaved onto one of the patties after it’s been flipped, and are then steamed below two slices of American cheese, leaving them somewhere between raw and cooked. By the time the burger gets to the diner, the onions, cheese, and patty become almost like one mass. Bread & butter pickles give the burger an extra acidic note, since Brock drains the brine and then holds the pickles in straight white vinegar before adding them to the bottom bun of the burger. Brock puts the pickle on the bottom because of the squeeze factor: the pressure exerted by the diner’s four fingers on the top of the burger can cause pickles to slide off, whereas the thumbs holding the bottom of the burger don’t squeeze as hard, keeping the pickle in place. When, and only when, local lettuces and tomatoes are in season, Brock adds them to the burger as well.

5. The Sauce

Inspired by the classic secret sauces of burger masters like In-N-Out and Shake Shack, Brock created his own “special sauce.” The sauce is basically every condiment Brock wanted on a burger including (but not limited to): ketchup, mayonnaise, mustard, pickles, and jalapeños. By mixing “every condiment you could want” into the sauce, Brock aims to further streamline his burger. A “tiny bit” is added to each side of the bun, leaving the diner with a burger that needs no additional dressing when it hits the table.

Until finally, courtesy of the fine folks at Food Republic who blagged all this detail directly from Chef Brock, here’s the recipe in all its majesty:

First, the burger ingredients

Cheeseburgers

1 (3-pound) fresh boneless chuck roast

12 ounces fresh flank steak

3 ounces bacon, preferably Benton’s

3 tablespoons unsalted butter, at room temperature

10 burger buns, preferably potato rolls

1 cup white onion, shaved

20 slices American cheese

50 Bread-and-Butter pickles

Next comes:

Special Sauce

1 3/4 cups mayonnaise, preferably Duke’s

1 1/4 cups yellow mustard

5 tablespoons ketchup

1/2 cup Bread-and-Butter pickles, drained and cut into 1/8-inch dice

1/4 cup pickled jalapeños, drained and cut into 1/8-inch dice

grated zest (use a Microplane) and juice of 1 lemon

1 tablespoon Husk hot sauce

Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste

2 tablespoons pepper vinegar, preferably Texas Pete brand

And finally, the prep work:

For the sauce:

Combine all of the ingredients in a large container and stir together to blend well.

Cover and refrigerate. (Tightly covered, the sauce will keep for up to 5 days in the refrigerator.)

For the cheeseburgers:

Grind the chuck, flank steak and bacon through a meat grinder fitted with the large die into a bowl.

Mix gently to combine.

Then run half of the mixture through the small die. Mix the two together.

Portion the meat mixture into twenty 3-ounce patties, about 1/2-inch thick (each burger gets 2 patties).

If not cooking right away, arrange on a baking sheet, cover tightly with plastic wrap and refrigerate. (The patties can be refrigerated for up to 1 day. Remove from the refrigerator about 30 minutes before you’re ready to cook; it’s important that the patties are not ice-cold when they hit the hot pan.)

Generously butter the tops and bottoms of the buns.

Toast on a griddle until nice and golden brown. Reserve.

Heat two 12-inch cast-iron skillets until as hot as possible.

Divide the patties between the two hot pans.

When the patties are nice and charred, about 2 minutes, flip them over and cook for 2 minutes more for medium.

Place the onion slices on 10 of the patties.

Place a slice of the cheese on all of the patties and allow it to melt, about 30 seconds.

Stack the non-onion patties on top of the onion patties. Remove from the heat.

Smear both sides of the buns with special sauce.

Place 5 pickles on the bottom half of each bun. Add the burger patties and top with the top halves of the buns. Serve at once.

A Brock-burger was originally published on Salute The Pig