#i want to keep believing in us and if you tell me to

[tonycries]

BUTTER

Synopsis. First time cúmming inside = first time losing his mind.

Pairings. [SEPARATE] Gojo x Reader, Sukuna x Reader, Choso x Reader, Geto x Reader, Nanami x Reader, Toji x Reader

Content. MDNI, fem! reader, creampíes, PÚSSYDRÚNK JJK MEN, breéding, cúmplay, men whímpering, virgínity loss (Choso), overstím, ínnapropriate use of jujutsu, GOJO’S POWERS, proposals, full nélson, true form Sukuna, dp, spítting, p slápping, p talking, limitless, oraI (fem rec.), pet names, swéaring.

Word count. 5.9k

A/N. Hope y’all have a lovely week <3

♡ TOJI FUSHIGURO - Earned it.

“I-is she really tellin’ me to hah- f-fill her up inside, doll?” Toji breathes, dazed eyes locked down at your stuffed entrance. And he can barely focus his gaze - barely even try to sound like himself right now. “I-is this real?”

Ragged rasps just about half as ruined as he feels, lilting up in pitch. In strain. Sharp intakes of breath becoming so labored when his entire hulking body wracks with a heaving shiver. 

And Toji’s scrambling his thick fingers to latch roughly onto your face, your waist - anywhere and everywhere that might help him keep an ounce of his sanity.

But it was too late.

“Heh, did I hngh- fuck the rationality outta ya? You really want me t-to-” Head throwing back, he can’t even think of finishing his sentence. Of doing anything other than curling one set of fingers around your throat. Biceps flexing when he shoves you even harder onto all fours on the silken sheets, he cranes over to place a line of pretty pecks down your teary cheeks, panting, “Well…wh-whatever my girl wants- she gets, right?”

And he meant it.

Oh, he couldn’t even believe it. Toji had your pretty pussy overfilled with all of his thick, thorough inches - slamming his hips drunkenly against yours when you’d babbled to cum inside. Fuck, it’s so real.

And that’s all it takes for him to clamor up one of his staggeringly muscular thighs up onto the plushy bed. To messily slip and slide across the saturated puddle of your sweet, sweet dripping juices and press his foot down shamelessly on your head. Like he couldn’t get enough.

The new angle nestles his hefty cock disruptively, dredges of his sweltering hot precum splat! against every inch of your clingy cunt.

“Oh yeah- th-this is the stuff.” His dark, dewy eyes veer to the very back of his head, hissing when his achy cock expands open your gummy walls. Throbbing head swelling plumper to curve even deeper, “Let me- l-let me hear ya, ma-”

Your trembly fingers rake a reddened line down his calf. Gasping for air at the way the rotund end of his angry, strawberry-pink tip kisses against your g-spot so snugly. “W-wan’ it so badly- please.”

“Want what?” Toji’s teasing tone rumbles from behind, and he’s gyrating his hips ever-so-slightly slower. Making sure to draw out those wet, translucent glides down your tight channel, “Can’t- can’t hear you-”

Honestly, he had absolutely no idea whether it was because of your honeyed tone breaking out into the cutest of whimpers, or because Toji’s ears were popping. Swatting a wet smack! at your beading clit to get you to yelp, his drawling mouth moves all by itself. “Already asked- t-tell me now unless ya want me to cum outside-”

“No! No no no-” And that was all the threat it took to have you careening unsteadily onto your elbows, fully forgetting the mean restraint of Toji’s foot on top of you. “Please- need you to cum inside please-”

“Louder.”

You’re sneakily shivering your hips down every one of his rummaging inches. “Toji-”

“Ohhhh- my bad.” With a slight snicker, his tongue glissades a wet gloss down the very edges of his scar. Leaving rounded circular bruises at your bobbing throat just how harshly Toji was jostling you with the vice-like embrace, and you can only manage out a few sniffles when he drags by one strong arm to crash the recoil into his ruthless hips. Dangerously stopping you in your tracks. Humming, “Stop fuckin’ running, I w-was talkin’ to ya pretty pussy.”

Your bleary eyes snap open, “What–”

“Shhh, doll- stop whining so much–” he’s cooing in a syrupy slow cadence. “Jus’ needa- needa hear it from her.”

Slapping down his leaky cockhead along your sloppy hole every few strokes, having you drooling a glossy sheen down his thick shaft like you were painting him. So much of it that the dripping wet noises were resounding in Toji’s ears, dancing around his melty mind like his new favorite song. 

Oh, he loved to hear it. Over and over and-

“S-so soaked.” he’s groaning out like a mantra, darkened eyes grifting together. Mouth can all but lift his drunken maw slack open at every tightening clamp of your syrupy pussy, “You want me to cum inside this badly, doll?” 

And you feel your puffed-up pussy lips get even more soaked at the utter pussydrunk look on Toji’s usually smug-features. “Because I’ve been thinking about this e-ever since the day I met ya-” He’s craning over - hunching, more like.  Baring you with his most crazed gaze, “To breed ya- to fill you up ‘ntil you think you’re gonna hah burst. To make ya a pretty momma so-” Back muscles flexing, abs aching with fatigue, lips dragging a sopping wet kiss. “-please let me cum inside.”

Ah, who was Toji Fushiguro against you?

Because as soon as your head even dares to move within the inch of that half-delirious nod you send his way, Toji’s sopping your insides sloshing wet with his cum. For the first time. In awe. Load after load being fucked up into you - white flashes behind your eyes when you feel it knock against your womb, trickling down over your cervix.

And there’s so much of it.

“Gonna have yer g-gorgeous eyes-” he slurs, crushing you with his full body weight. “-n’ your smile fuck- my love for ya-” It won’t’ stop - Toji can’t stop, can’t reel back the weepy curving divot of his head. “M’thinking four- no- five.” Still oozing out a milky gloss even when he’s dragging his fat cock out of your hole. 

Still cumming. Smearing every nook and cranny of the sheet below white as he flips you around and plants a sudden smack! on your overspilling pussy, gushing out obscenely when Toji’s urgently bringing his face down, down, down.

“Oh. Fuckin’ delicious.” His eyes droop half-lidded at the heavenly sight - shit, he could get used to this. Mouth watering, his feverish breath wafts all over your sensitive pussy. “I earned this, didn’t I, ma?”

♡ NANAMI KENTO - Happy wife, happy life

“Ken-”

“...”

“Ken.”

But oh, Nanami Kento can’t even hear his pretty wife right about now. Can’t do anything but shove his greedy tongue down the ends of your sopping wet slit, pooling your syrupy juices all the way down to his throat.

In fact, the only response you’re being gifted with is a furious pull on his dangling work tie - barely even bothering to change out of it - to be able to swipe his nose down more freely in a long kiss down your puffy clit. More, more, more-

Keening, your fingers tangle into Nanami’s blond strands - tugging, dragging, but shit, he couldn’t - wont. It hurt for him to even think of pulling away. Roughened palms scissor past your folds, and he pants, “P-please- fuck- just a bit- more-”

He was addicted. Gone. 

“B-but Ken-” Couldn’t register anything past the way your voice was dipping into a whiny territory right now that made him twitch dangerously. That is, until- “Wan’ to cum w-with you- to have you ah- cum inside-”

Oh.

If you thought that Nanami was drunk on you before then you were completely unprepared for the way that singular babbling plea make him still. 

It makes him gasp, honeyed eyes widening, feverish breaths spilling out in heaving puffs of condensation - once, twice. Before your back is suddenly slamming down on the counter, legs splayed out shamefully by Nanami’s sturdy forearms, and your cunt-

Fuck, in a few split-seconds, you were being stuffed so thoroughly open. Nanami’s reddish cockhead springing down to gift a wet thwack! thwack! thwack! on your puffed-up clit, he’s swiping down the ends of your drooling lips. 

“I-inside?” he breathes, a few octaves higher than usual.

You’re nodding, your fingers twirling around his haphazard tie. “Inside.”

“Anything…” Nanami breathes, and he sounds like he doesn’t even know that he’s saying the words. Barely ripping his gaze from you to scramble for your left hand - before placing a sweet, sweet peck on that cool wedding band on your ring finger. “Anything f-for you, my love.”

You’re almost crying at that ruthless stretch of his globular tip poking at your insides, he’s caving in a way open - and even after so many years, you’ve never gotten used to how staggeringly big Nanami’s girth was. How his curved divot was steaming out a thick wad of precum that already made you feel so full.

Now, you two had discussed kids - but never acted upon it like this. This needy. This frenzied-

“Wh-whatever you want, y’know-” He’s humming depravedly into your mouth like a mantra,  thumbing past your pouty lips to spit into your mouth. And that very sight of those translucent splatters makes his hips stutter mindlessly, “Anything for you- anything for the future momma of my kids-”

Shit, you throw your head back as soon as he’s grazing two digits down the very hood of your neglected clit - only for Nanami to jostle your head over his hands.

“C-careful-” he murmurs, hand dipping down to massage your neck. Your shoulders - all while his fat cock was rummaging every nook and cranny of your insides. “-don’t wan’ you to hurt your- hah-self, darling. S’not good f-for the-”

Baby.

Nanami doesn’t think he can even bear to say that simple word right about now. 

Risking losing whatever’s left of his sanity, he’s wrapping one beefy arm around your middle to crush your body to his. And before you know it, you’re being hastily jostled off of the counter and dangled midair - all while your gentle husband barely even breaks a sweat. Utilizing the lewd properties of gravity to let you bounce down onto his long length and back upwards. His voice cracks, “-baby.”

“Ah-” your trembly hands wrap their way around his neck, giving Nanami the perfect angle to pepper peck after sultry peck onto your bouncing tits. “D-don’t hah- drop me, Ken, m’kay?”

Drop you?

Drop you?

God, he lets out a slight chuckle at the very thought. Angling to rut his inches even deeper upwards, every tiny massage of your elastic walls around his painful cock makes Nanami nod. So fervently that stray strands stick to his prespired forehead. Such a pretty mess of your sensible husband. “Mhm- w-won’t drop you, I swear- I swear-”

Hips speeding up in such a sloppy way now, but even how you’re tightening his tie won’t make Nanami stop - slow down.

“Promise?”

Slowly, his dribbling cock gushes out even in even more velvety ribbons, you’re watching in such delirious awe at the way those delicate strings of slick and spit stretch all down his pinkish shaft. 

“Promise-” he groans, feeling light-headed. Heavy balls thwacking in a sticky staccato against your ass. Fingers gliding up, up, up to where he was nudging your sensitive g-spot, bruising out his circumference on all your sensitive areas. Kiss after French kiss into your gooey heaven. He presses down. “-gonna f-fill you up right here- won’t miss. Swear I won’t m-miss-”

And he doesn’t.

God, he grows sullenly quiet to hear all those delicious squelches the very moment Nanami’s steaming hot cum is spilling into you. Warming you from the very insides- and your own orgasm has you seeing stars. 

Sloshing around in his favorite little swivels, he can’t help but let his hips gyrate slowly to feel it coat a creamy gloss down his sensitive cock. To feel your tiny whimpers and whines when his seed dredges down your womb. Drip! drip! dripping onto the kitchen tile in an echoing splatter from your slobbery slit. 

You leave a wet peck at the ends of his curled lips, “W-wan’ keep it all inside, Ken- all of it-”

God, you were going to be the death of him.

“M’gonna marry you all over again- s-swear and- and…” And just then, he shudders so violently that you fear for a split-second, legs around his toned waist tightening. “-o-oh, my love- m’gonna cum again.”

♡ GETO SUGURU - “U-use me.”

“I-I’m so close-”  Geto finds it in himself to grit his teeth, to force his jittery fingers up to pinch your plump clit. “-gonna cum- fuck, s-stop riding me, honey- unless ya want me to fill you up heh-”

It’s said so low and sultry and even through your hazy mind, you know that it’s a simple tease coming from your boyfriend. You know that he didn’t mean anything by it - but that certainly doesn’t stop the way that your hands grasp around his shoulders, knocking your heads into a messy French kiss. “But, I want you to, Sugu.”

Oh. 

Geto Suguru can’t hide the way his chest heaves with a choked-up moan, how his head throws to the very back of his silken pillowcases when his hips rut upwards into you like a fucking animal.

It’s like he was out of control. Ears ringing with the words, it takes the cult leader below you every shred of will in his entire body to groan out, “D-don’t joke like that- fuck- gonna give me a heart attack, y’know-”

“M’not joking.”

Shit, his eyes widen. Straying down to where your puffy pussy lips were bulging around his fat girth, swallowing up every greedy inch that you were being drilled with. Throat dry, every sound that comes out of him now is painfully raspy, “Y-you fuckin’ mean it? Better not be fuck- talking outta this naughty-” Swat! Coming down to kiss a punishing smack against the edges of your drooling cunt. “-pussy.”

You couldn’t fake the way that makes you glissadingingly drenched even if you wanted to. Nails raking down Geto’s curvaceous pecs to steady your stuttering hips, your bounces grow frantic. 

“Please- c-cum inside-” begging. Maybe you were cockdrunk already, pouting in a way that has his hefty, cum-filled balls squeezing. “Jus’ want you all inside-”

And when Geto thinks back to this situation, he doesn’t know how he was ever supposed to stand a chance. Because with a gasping ricochet of his fat, curved cock onto your most precious g-spot, he’s surging stringy wads of seeds that trickles down your inner thigh. Cumming and cumming so hard - it’s never felt this good - that he almost forgets it’s too early.

That is, until you’re gasping a soft “Baby, did you-”

“Sh-shut up-” And you swear your big, strong boyfriend whimpers. He’s furiously blinking away those glittery globular tears at the ends of his eyes. A tiny pout smeared across his rosy pink lips when you’re being flipped.

One hand around your throat, the other plugging back creamy dredge after dredge into your drooling cunt. Almost as if it was offensive to him to catch that syrupy drizzle, he’s making such a fucking mess. 

“Such a filthy girl- n’ a filthy cunt-” He sputters out, and Geto felt like he was burning a bright red blush all down his pretty features. Matching the angry way your hips were being slammed into his, “Think you s-sooo fuckin’ fuck- fuck fuck fuck-”

And shit, he can’t even finish his sentence before those moans are petering out into speechlessness. A singular tight squeeze of your gummy walls encircles his hot girth. And it’s enough to make him whine, “Please- fuck, how are you doing this-”

Sounding so genuinely in disbelief, you watch as Geto’s mouth drops lewdly at the way every pearlescent bead of his cum was directed towards your cunt. Seeping out through the edges of your sopping lips.

You’re giggling in a drunken way that makes him flinch, “S-something wrong, Sugu?”

“Don’t-” he bares you with a feral grin. Heavy limbs throwing apart your limp legs to jostle his hips into you even harder, and it’s like Geto was spearheading into your lungs. Swiping up translucent wet splatters of his fat head in delicious drags down your spongy cervix. Hissing that even the slightest bit of recoil had him parting from the melty depths of your pussy. “-don’t call m that ‘nless you want me to- oh-” His dewy eyes roll to the back of his head, leaving another unapologetic smack! on your peaked clit. “-t-too late. M’gonna cum- fuck fuck fuck- n’ s’all your fault-”

“Awww–” Teasingly, your fingers drag through his long curtain of hair, scratching lightly at Geto’s scalp in a way that makes him purr. “-how can I hah- make it up to you, Sugu?”

The only thing he wanted right now was to cum inside you again. Once more. Twice. Thrice. Again and again and-

“Use me-” Geto gasps, and he’s careening his head down for what you assumed would be one of his favorite messy kisses - only to wrap those pinkish lips around your tongue and suck. “Use me use me- ohh please, use me- honey- make me a daddy. D-don’t even care anymore-”

And when he cums, Geto’s filling your already sloshingly drenched cunt with heavy loads of his seed. Sticky and honeyed enough that it’s next to impossible for him to pull out and sheath his rock-hard dick unforgivingly into your pussy. 

One of the biggest threats to jujutsu society - whimpering when he spews out a stream of wet swears into your open-mouth, shivering at every one of your milking clamps to drag out something delicious from him. 

He’s curling his hulking body into yours, dripping fingers glistening all the way down to Geto’s wrist with just how much of his loads he’d shoveled all the way back inside your cunt. Giving your sloppy hole a languid circle around the diameter with his slender fingers, before popping them into his mouth. 

And Geto can only see stars behind his eyes, he can only moan at the taste, “I think…” Peaking out a hazy eye at your squirming figure - where the hell did you think you were going? He’s hypnotized, dragging you back into his clutches with a hand curled prettily around your throat. “-that w-we’re not done until m’cumming b-blanks, honey.”

♡ CHOSO KAMO - Marry you…

One swipe - just one swipe of Choso’s fattened, blushing red tip down your slit is all that it takes for his stupidly pussydrunken eyes to run to the back of his head. For his drooling mouth to slack open with all the utter need of a virgin, “Please-”

You’re humming through your moans, arching your body just right for him to feed you more and more of his half-flaccid inches. “Tell me what you want, baby-”

Fuck, he’s winking open his eyes to peer down at you. Hands traveling their way to roughly jostle your pliant body into one of the meanest mating presses you’d never thought your dear inexperienced best friend possible.

“N-noo–” Choso’s whining, pressing wet pecks down your lips. “Don’t call me that, baby- or else m’gonna…”

Choso’s handsome cheeks burn a shameful red when his eyes drift down to the gooey splatters of cum smeared along your stomach from not too long ago. Just the prospect of being able to put it in too much for his fried brain to handle.

And you’re finding your fingers darting across the glossy sheen sticking to your skin, bringing those drippingly wet digits up, up, up for Choso to gladly wrap his lips around. Sucking. 

“But I want you to, Cho–” Watching as his eyes widen, mouth dropping into a soft oh! Your voice drops into such a hum that makes his swollen tip twitch startlingly. “Want you to c-cum inside m-”

Shit, he doesn’t hear the rest of the sentence - and he doesn’t want to. 

Not unless Choso wants to make an even bigger fool of himself in front of his pretty best friend that oh-so-kindly suggested taking away his virginity. Not like there’s anyone else he’d even dream of giving it to.

Thick, sculpted thigh hiking up, he’s slamming his hefty cockhead down until your swollen folds were kissing up in a sweet, sweet pucker against his thick hilt. Grinding in slow, sultry gyrations upwards like he still wanted to stuff you with more, more, more- 

“I-I can can cum inside?” Forehead beading with sweat, lower lip wobbling with the sheer effort that it took to merely hold back the way that his achingly hard cock was straining for release once more. Hissing at the almost sizzling drag of precum down your bulging g-spot. “For my first time? Inside? R-really inside?”

And despite the way that he was so patiently waiting for your answer, Choso couldn’t help the way the greedy curve of his thumb swipes down your peaked clit. Rolling in lazy circles - low, and slow to make your gummy walls clench in that particular way he’s slowly gotten addicted to. 

You’re nodding with a smug smile at how pretty he looked all fucked-out like this. Darkened eyes all droopy and half-lidded like he was blinking through syrup, muscles twitching mouth-wateringly, hair browner than usual with his sweat-dampened streaks. You can’t help but wring your fingers through his locks and tug, in a way that makes him hiss. In a way that makes him gasp. 

In a way that has him spurting out a thicker stream of precum into your gooey cunt - close. So close. “Mhm– let it a-all out inside, baby.”

Oh god, and then he does-

He does and Choso’s sure he sees the pearly gates of heaven right then and there, and he knows you’re his very own angel.

“Move your pretty fingers, baby– I wan’ you to t-take it all-” It’s not even mean the way he swats away one of your hands subconsciously cupping your split pussy - it’s just desperate. So that he can place pound after filthy pound to fuck you into the soaked sheets. 

Whining out, “Yeah please- fuck-”  Snapping his flexible body down until you were folded helplessly in half, every languid second is spent with such velvety ropes of cum being stuffed down to the bottom of your pussy. “Wan’ this forever- forever please-” Thick, stringy wads that stick and slide down your walls - that overspills when it’s too much for your snug channel to take. “W-want this…”

And just one look of his greedy gazy downwards And Choso’s gasping like he couldn’t even believe he could cum this much - couldn’t even believe he could stop at this point.

“Marry me-” he’s sputtering, eyes clearer with the sudden idea. As if he’s imagining it already. Hips shifting to lazy down his sloppy staccato into something more thorough. “B-be my wife- have my kids- please-” Something that has your toes curling with pleasure, branding every ridge and thumping vein down his shaft into your walls contorting around him. Hiccuping - little sobs curling at the back of his throat, “Please- please I need you to marry me-” 

It’s overspilling - adding to that little milky pool from below. He’s barely even thinking before swiping a hand through some of those creamy remnants of cum. Sucking. Taking your own - popping that ring finger of yours into his mouth.

Drool drips down the side of his sodden lips, moving to mewl softly. “D-did that really just happen?”

The words come out nothing but a whisper, strangled and strained from the very depths of his rumbling chest. And Choso’s peering down at you like you were everything - his softening cock sending sparks down his spine with every slight rub down your sopping wet folds. 

“Mhm–” your hands make their way down his pecs, rubbing over pert, pink nipples. Something that makes him let out a low shudder, reddened divot bursting in a few more wispy strings of seed. “N’ you did so hngh- good, Cho.”

“D-did I? Was I your oh- good boy?” he stutters, before letting out a keening pout. “B-but I need to have you cum, too, baby- need to have you cum-” And you’re so at his ravenous mercy when Choso swipes a wet thumb over and over down your throbbing clit. “-and then- then can we get married?”

♡ RYOMEN SUKUNA - MESS!

“What the fuck-” The king of curses breathes - he heaves - like never before, even in that human form of his right now. “Wh-what the fuck have you done to me, woman-”

And all the foes in the world had nothing against your honeyed whines. Absolutely no match for the way your elastic walls were clinging around his throbbing cock so tight. No match for your cockdrunk babbling that drove him insane.

“Such a filthy mouth you h-have-” he groans, leering over his inhumanly powerful body to bend over yours. You’re gaping when one of his big, beefy arms jostle you upwards into a headlock. Even shapeshifted from his true form, he was still so strong. Spitting, “Do you dare to- fuck- move those pretty lips of yours n’ repeat those words back to me, brat.”

As if you could do anything else. 

“I-I said-” you’re choking out, panting in feverish gasps of the heady air. “-said I want you to c-cum inside-”

Oh. 

In a split-second, you’re feeling your tautly stretched walls expand to limits you weren’t even sure were possible. The very bottom of your pussy being ravaged with two circular brandings - two. Two matching rock-hard cocks jostling around you. 

And the stretch of Sukuna’s devilishly true form opening your cunt to its very limits is so maddening that it takes you a second to realize that the rest of him had shapeshifted, too. 

Suddenly bigger, suddenly more towering, suddenly the king of curses. 

His strong forearm curls even tighter around your throat, knocking the remaining gasps out of your lungs. “Seriously? L-look where talking outta ya slutty pussy hah- got me-” Sukuna chuckles. Deep and rumbling from his bulging pecs, “-c-can’t even hold a n-normal form- you made me do this- fuck-”

He was fucking you like it was your fault.

Solid inches upon inches that were bruising. And if you thought that Sukuna’s size was staggering in whatever human form he’d conjured up for the safety of your poor pussy - it was absolutely incredible with both his twin girthy cocks. Bigger, thicker. The slightest ruts and grinds into your gushing cunt having him knocking into your lungs, painting down a hefty load of steamy precum. 

Messy.

“Messy-” you hear a primal rumble from above you. Shit, did you say that out loud? Condensed breath heady and hot against your ear, “Heheh- you think this is m-messy, lil’ human? Wait until I-I- hah-”

“Y-you’re really gonna cum inside, Kuna?” you’re batting your teary lashes up at your king, a delirious smile smearing itself all over your face. 

Wobbling when his snapping hips purposefully slow down to mere gyrating squelches, every push and pull feeding your slobbery pussy languidly. You have him hypnotized, maw slacking open with every lazy drag of his heavy cocks back and forth back and forth back and- “Mhm- gonna fill ya up. Breed ya u-until you’re begging that ya can’t take it. Until y-you’re all round n’ glowing with my heirs.”

God. He was out of control.

“I-I can take it-” Your nails rake airily down his ever-tightening forearm - nothing but mere kitten scratches to Sukuna. “Promise Kuna- I can-”

“Tch- this damn naughty m-mouth of yours.” he smirks in a sleazy way - just about all that Sukuna can do to not let his voice break out in whimpers right now. All he can do to hold back his building high, curvaceous tips of his thickened cocks spazzing out tight, voluminous globs of wispy white. He’s covering your prattling mouth with one hand, “Take it then- take it- but ya better make an equal mess f’me. Heh-”

Even through your bleary mind, you already knew what he wanted - to have you squirt all down Sukuna’s weepy cocks. To make a mess. 

Always his favorite.

“Th-think ya can do that?” He snarls down at you, twiddling a few sopping wet digits to toy with your pulsing clit. Third and fourth arms snaking around your waist to keep from your pathetic scrambling. To stop your escape when his hips jackhammer away harder. “Can you- my queen?”

Oh, he cuts himself off with a whimper.

Because all of a sudden your gushing cunt is surging out in waves of translucent slick. It sticks to his rubbing cocks - and all the way to his washboard abs -like a gloss, stars behind your eyes when Sukuna’s fucking you through your high. Praises slipping out in a way that would’ve tarnished the king’s reputation if anyone found out.

But right now, he didn’t care. 

Not when he’s all but bursting from his bawling tips - such thick rivers of cum that knock mercilessly into your gummy spots. The force of both his fat heads streaming out relentlessly is enough to leave your forbidden sweet spots all bruised and battered. 

Inflating your snug channel until Sukuna only had to slide a hand down to about halfway down your abdomen, pressing down at that nudge. “Heh, s’right at h-home-” 

And now that he’s filled your pretty pussy with seed, Ryomen Sukuna doesn’t think it’s possible to cum anywhere else. With a shuddering hiss, he’s dragging his cocks out, spying down with hooded eyes at the way your sloppy entrance was molding and constrictign around him - like you were trying to milk the fucking soul out of him.

But Sukuna had other plans - plans that included letting his second tongue loll out, rough tastebuds sweeping a long lick down your leaky slit. Creamy cum trickling down the pinkish muscle, and he could feel his mouth grinning. Something he’s been wanting to do since he moment he fucking saw you.

“H-hey-” you’re turning your head to huff back at him. 

Smack!

“Ahh, stop yer whining-” Sukuna’s smoothing one hand down over the raised bumps of all five digits on your ass, another one of his hands guiding his fat bases to drive up your sopping crease. Pooling the milky remnants on his rotund tips. “-because m’not done breeding this cunt properly yet, my queen.”

♡ GOJO SATORU - Limit(less)

“This time-” Gojo’s heaving out a dragging shudder, his face burying hotly within the tender crook of your neck. Spitting - panting, “This time this time- this- time-”

Oh, it’s been just about the same thing that he’s been babbling for the past few hours now. All that he can utter after so long of his sensitively overworked cock stuffing in and out over your overspilling cunt, flickers of jujutsu bolting with every sodden drag down your melty walls.

Truly, the strongest didn’t expect to be addicted the first time he filled your drooling pussy with thick globs of his seed - it was an accident, the first trial of trying to use limitless for its…unintended purposes. 

But right now, Gojo had absolutely no clue if this was the nth trial or whether he was simply addicted to breeding your pretty cunt.

“T-Toru–” Your fingers scramble backwards to bury in his snow locks - difficult, with the way that your boyfriend was wrangling you into a tight full nelson. Feeling the push and pull of thick cursed technique in the air - inside you. “-s’not gonna work.”

God, just the sear of your grip on his scalp is enough to have Gojo’s hips rutting up in a perfect curve off the plush king-size mattress. Fucking up into your cunt so thoroughly that you gasp at the syrupy slosh of his cum from before inside you. 

His hiccups, voice cracking into a whine at the very end. “D-do you hate me, sweetheart?”

“No?” you’re breathing out in exasperation. But shit, you underestimate just how crazed this tiniest sentiment would drive him, choking back a strangled cry of your name when he’s sending a buzzing smack! down to the hood of your plump cunt. “Fuck- why would you think-”

“Th-then let me use limitless as a- hah- condom, pretty girl-” he’s whining. And you jolt at the wet splatters of a few stimulated, pearlescent tears slipping their way out of Gojo’s eyes. “It’ll work- this time- m’the strongest- s’gonna hah- w-work- a-and if not m’jus’ breedin’ my girl’s cute cunt, r-right?”

But even as he’s prattling on and on about this, you’re feeling the flickering falter of jujutsu around Gojo’s hefty girth. Molding your gummy walls taut around his fat circumference, your spine arches with electricity. 

“Heheh-” Goosebumps prickle down your spine at the high, humorless bout of laughter at your ear - and you crane your head to look at Gojo. Sure that he’s lost it. Already wondering just how high the kill count would be. “-didn’t think th-this pretty pussy of yours would have me so ruined, sweetheart.”

And truly - he sounded like it. 

He looked like it, with his rosy lips ajar, those cerulean eyes watery and half-lidded. Glowing with power and tiny shivers of lighting at every sodden kiss to the bullseye of your g-spot. Clashing over and over in a wet push and pull, Gojo thinks that he could almost feel the rotund indentations of his curved tip right on your sweetest spots. 

“Looks like y-you’re the one ruining me- Toru-” you whine. “Just look-”

Drunkenly, Gojo’s lolling his head to the sound of your voice. Not even looking, barely even thinking - that is, until he sees.

And Gojo can’t help but let out a slew of honeyed, pathetically cracking profanities at the heavenly sight below. Pale forearms stretching out your trembly thighs even more shamefully wide to get an even closer look. 

Of your quivering hole winking up at him glisteningly, coating his fat hilt a creamy ring of white from so many of his failed attempts. Your saturatedly wet pussy lips were practically gulping up all of his heavy inches, slobbering a slow trail of drool down the side of his strawberry pink shaft and onto his twitchy balls. Needy. 

And if Gojo’s limitless protection was unsteady before then-

“Shit-” Gojo takes in a shuddering gasp, slender digits falling down to plant a wet smack! on the very middle of your bulging slit - as if all of this was your fault. “Shit shit shit shit- I-I can’t- oh-” Sharp canines sinking down so hard into your skin that you think he might break through. Just about all that’s keeping Gojo tethered to reality when his limitless shatters. “Oh god. Th-think s’gonna be another b-baby…”

All the way into a zillion pieces of nothingness and-

And then he’s cumming. 

Cumming so hard that the dim lamps by the side of your bed flickers. Then explodes. 

Pouring out such steaming hot piles of his cum - once. Twice. Before his swollen, overwhelmed balls are clenching and then he’s shooting nothing but pathetic blanks. 

It takes you a second to register the sudden darkness - all across Tokyo, in fact. You’re gasping, “O-oh, Toru did you-”

“Run out-” he’s giggling. Giggling. “Fuck you m-made me- hah- really milked me dry, didn’t ya- Spread those pretty legs a bit more, pretty girl. Let me see.” All five rounded pads of his fingers are bruising on your thigh when Gojo’s splaying them out to confirm the sputtering way his cock was driving into you. “Can’t- can’t believe- no way, baby m’supposed t-to fill you up-”

Shit, he was babbling out his true intentions so stupidly. But luck was on his side, because with a final, jujutsu-sheened swat at your cunt, the buzzing power finally sends you over the edge. 

Crashing headfirst into waves upon waves of white-hot pleasure, the engulfing goodness made you squeal. And it made Gojo grit his teeth with a low whimper at the way the simple clenching convulse of your gripping walls wrapped around his cock made him twitch in another dry orgasm. Another. And another. 

God, his first - well, not quite first - time cumming inside you and he’s already so fucked out.

Yet, despite it all, Gojo could almost count it a success…almost. 

“S-sweetheart, y’know Yaga always taught us that science experiments have hah- twenty-five trials, right?”

“...”

A/N. Gojo’s so annoying I love him.

Plagiarism not authorized.

[megamindsecretlair]

Make Me Weak, Part 2

Pairing: Sex Therapist!Terry Richmond x Sub!Black!Fem!/ Plus Size reader

Warnings: 18+, Minors DNI, You are in charge of your own reading experience. Intentional use of AAVE. Cursing, mentions of depression, anxiety, and description of sex acts and sexual issues. Hair pulling, PIV, condom use. Power imbalance, Shy!reader. Dark!Terry. Dom!Terry, AU Terry, all consensual. Sorry if I missed some. I'm not a therapist and while I do not make light of therapy, this is purely for my own fun. Please seek real medical attention when necessary.

Summary: You followed Dr. Richmond’s instructions to the best of your ability. You spent so much time in your mind that willingly descending into your body was an experience that opened your eyes to how much you had neglected. Your second session forces you to confront more truths than what you were ready for. 

Terry reaches some conclusions of his own as he tries to shake whatever is ailing him by disappearing between Tasia’s thighs. Yet his mind is on you, on your thoughts and words. During the second session, he can’t help but push you beyond your limit.

Word Count: 5,018k

Part 1 | AO3 Link

A/N: I'n back babbyyyy. I got so inspired reading so many lovely fics. Plus the encouraging asks really helped. I had TOO much fun writing this and you will not hurt my feelings if you don't want to read this one. However, I must tag to keep my taglist updated. Forgive me, my loves. Toss a coin to your blogger by leaving a comment, gif, or unhinged ask.

You

Hot steam rolled out from the shower as you set it to your desired temperature. You faced yourself in the mirror, thinking over Dr. Richmond’s words. You supposed that there was some truth to what he had told you.

Most people did start by exploring their own bodies first. It must be so easy for guys. Close the door, grab some lotion, and rub one out. Girls on the other hand…your life was constantly spent in a state of panic.

Panic that anything on your person would make your mother snap. Harsh criticisms hidden behind “just talkin’ shit” that Black people liked to hide behind. You were too sensitive to jokey-joke with when you weren’t able to reciprocate. It’s not like you could talk about your mom. It’s not like you could throw insults back in her face and tell her to take it in stride.

Panic that you could be caught or exposed at any point. You were a grown woman, yes. You were also taught to believe that you needed to act as if someone was watching. You believed there was some kind of life after all this and so wouldn’t it stand to reason that someone or something would be looking at you? Or worse, someone would come flying through your door because your family lacked boundaries? 

Panic that you didn’t know what lay on the other side of an orgasm. How would you feel? How would you look? Surely something like that changed a person. Feeling that rush of relief for the first time had to be special. Had to be amazing. Otherwise, why would anyone ever be obsessed with sex? 

Panic that you’d never reach that peak and fall over. Never feel that rush of euphoria that everyone talked about. Porn, books, friend groups. You always felt left out and you didn’t want to anymore, dammit. 

You watched yourself in the mirror as steam overtook it, inch by inch. Until you were only staring at your eyes and the disbelief written all over your face. Would this even work? Were you wasting your time? 

“I need total, focused commitment from you.”

Dr. Richmond’s sultry voice skittered along your naked skin. Goosebumps raised on your flesh from the cold air moving through the house. You would be focused. You would be committed. This was something you wanted so badly, you were fucking desperate. 

So you took deep, measured breaths using the Box method a previous therapist told you about. You inhaled for a count of four, held for four, exhaled for a count of four, and then held it for four. You repeated the process, doing a full body scan. 

You focused on your head, starting with your scalp. You focused on your forehead, feeling the tension melt away and your eyebrows start to relax. You hadn’t even realized that you had it scrunched.

You brought your attention to your eyes, unfocusing them, and allowed them to close. You repeated the process, breathing the entire time, settling down into your body when your mind wanted so badly to escape. To flee. To leave the Horrors. 

When you felt your mind drift, you didn’t chastise yourself. You continued to breathe, focusing on your breaths until you continued with your scan. Your body relaxed fraction by fraction. Your shoulders lowered from up around your neck. Aches and pains became more prominent. 

Your belly expanded and you sighed. You hadn’t even noticed how often you clenched your stomach, never allowing yourself a full breath. You always had to be on edge. Never knew where the next danger was coming from. What new fresh hell you would encounter just around the corner. 

By the time you reached your feet, you felt more relaxed than you had in a long time. Your body prickled with your newfound awareness. Steam caressed your bareskin and you quickly hopped in the shower, letting the warm water cascade across your body.

The water felt different on your body. Each droplet may as well have been a tiny earthquake, popping all over your skin and making you tingle. This…wasn’t too bad. 

You lathered up your facial scrub and gently moisturized your face, soothing the stiff areas. Your jaw popped as it loosened and you moaned from the relief. 

How long? How long have you spent outside of your body? A stranger to it? A foreigner to this vessel you carried around? Had you truly loved your body when you were so alien to it? Or had you just learned to layer on the armor and pretend? 

God, you felt like crying. With one session, Dr. Richmond already had you re-thinking your entire life. Like the answer was there in your face the entire time and you just needed him to shine a light on it. 

You rinsed your face while you grabbed a washcloth and lathered up with your favorite soap. You added body wash and then took your time trailing the washcloth around your body. Starting with your neck, you worked your way down to your chest. 

You took your time feeling the rough cloth against your smooth, watery skin. You rounded the washcloth across your nipples and they beaded under the slow torture. Oh, this was new. This was very nice. 

You were focused, letting the water act as a sound machine, lulling you into a further relaxed state. You followed the washcloth with your hand, moving over and under your areolas and nipples. You pinched your nipples and gave it a tug. You gasped from the responding tug in your pussy.

You moved on, remembering Dr. Richmond’s words about not making it sexual. But fuck, how could you not? 

Heat flushed beneath your skin that had nothing to do with the hot water on your body. You washed your back and then moved lower, skirting your throbbing pussy and washed your legs and dug the cloth between your toes. 

On the way up, your fingers glided around your mound, your hips pushing forward. Your breathing turned rapid, feeling yourself getting more and more excited. Your brain turned to mush, retreating from your actions. Like it wanted to picture something else. You shook your head, and started up with your Box breathing again.

You stopped mid-shower to reorient yourself and get yourself back into that zone of ultimate calm. If Dr. Richmond were there…

You focused on what he might say. There was no rush. There was no rulebook for this sort of thing. There was no reason to chastise yourself. There was no test to pass or box you had to check in order to achieve an orgasm. You just needed to relax, dammit. 

Slowly, achingly slow, you went back to that calm. You continued lathering up your body and then rinsed the soap off. You repeated the process, adding more soap to thoroughly wash your body. To enjoy the feel of the cloth and water and soap on your skin. On your body. 

“This is the only body you’ll ever have so it’s time to think beyond simple body maintenance. Admire your body.”

This was the only body you would ever have. It was time you stopped treating it like the enemy. 

You turned off the water and then got out. The chill air hit the water on your back and you shrieked and shivered, quickly drying off. You went through your nightly routine, taking care of your teeth, face, and deodorant. You sat down on a decorated stool in your bathroom to apply your lotion.

As instructed, you looked at your body. Every mole, every scar, every bump, and every wayward hair. Being in your body was weird to say the least. You had to disassociate to survive your childhood and you never learned to drop those defenses. Your body never realized that it wasn't at war anymore. Or perhaps it was and this was battle fatigue. You were so damn tired.

You massaged the lotion into your skin and then slipped in your panties. You pulled on an ankle bracelet you got while visiting New York once and it made you feel extra pretty, so why not. You turned on your bedside light and pulled out a notebook.

You started a new entry and wrote about the sensations and revelations you experienced. Some of it you would discuss with Dr. Richmond and some of it was never leaving your grave. It felt good to get it all out, uninterrupted.

Sometimes, venting to someone else just gave them room to talk over you. To steer the direction back to them. Brooklyn was like that. In an effort to relate, she ended up taking over the convo and made it about her situation. Then you ended up comforting her about her issue and never feeling truly heard about yours.

In a journal however, you pretended that you were just relaying it to a friend. The type of friend who allowed you to speak. To get your jumbled thoughts out without getting mad or trying overshadow you. 

Done, you collapsed against your bed as if every ounce of strength left your body. You breathed through it, allowed your body to rest for a moment. The hell kind of voo-doo shit did your therapist put you through?

Immediately, warning bells went off in your mind. Surely, you would be whisked away to some super important task around the house. Surely, your phone would ring with some awful accident you had to attend to. Surely…nothing. You were drained. You had nothing. 

You had just enough energy to put the journal up, turn off the light, and drift off to the deepest sleep of your life.

Terry

Tasia bounced like a porn star on Terry’s dick and it wasn’t doing a damn thing for him. He felt himself getting soft the more Tasia shuddered with her pleasure. At least one of them was having fun. 

Maybe he rushed this. Too intent on getting you out of his mind that he hopped immediately into Tasia’s warm heat and didn’t consider that there was no substitution. He knew it was irrational to be drawn to you so fast. After only one session. He was conflicted on that front, but it went beyond just looks. 

Your case, your assessments, your willingness to try, and your obvious smarts was a cocktail shooting through his veins and turning his body liquid. The perfect sub was dropped into his lap and he couldn’t do a damn thing about it.

And as a man used to getting his way in the bedroom, it stuck in his craw that he couldn’t have you. That it wasn’t your pussy that his dick disappeared inside of. Would you moan loudly? Were you shy in the bedroom? Were you enthusiastic? 

What would your mouth look like taking the full length of him? How far down could you suck him? Did that same determination translate to the bedroom?

Tasia grunted beneath him as his dick rose back to life, thoughts of you turning him harder than a brick. He could build a house with how hard he was at the moment, picturing the curves on your body. The natural handles in your waist for his big hands to wrap around. To hold.

He moaned, picturing it all so clearly. His thumbs would dig into your back. The sounds you would make. His hips jerked just thinking of pounding into you. No mercy. You weren’t some fragile flower. Your insightful thoughts were like a mirror to his own. He wanted to explore with you. And the fact that he couldn’t had him pulling Tasia’s hair back.

“Call me Dr. Richmond,” he commanded.

“Yes, D-Dr. Richmond,” Tasia moaned. It was starting to piss him off. 

“Softer,” he said.

“Yes, Dr. Richmond,” she said, bringing her voice lower, softer. It was nowhere near your voice, but it’d do for the fantasy he concocted in his head. He didn’t have time for any extra tricks tonight. He just needed to get to the other side of his nut. 

He closed his eyes and thought about your case. He wondered if you were doing as you were told. He wondered how well you would take commands in the bedroom. If he even had to give commands at all. If you’d instinctively know what he needed when he needed it. Tasia used to know that. Tasia used to have him out of breath. 

Now…she was a beautiful girl with deep mocha skin, a cute face, and wide expressive eyes. She was like a little doe in a meadow somewhere. He was attracted to the overall softness of her and of her body. The natural way she seemed to know what he needed. 

Perhaps it was him that had changed. His tastes. He was no longer interested in a casual sub-relationship. Perhaps he wanted a more permanent sub. One he could explore every single nasty fantasy with and never get bored. He was getting older, getting into his early-thirties without a significant partner.

And that was what he wanted. A partner. An equal. Someone he raced home to see or spent his days thinking about how he would break her and put her back together like a puzzle box. 

Terry groaned and came into the condom, gripping Tasia’s asscheeks for dear life. It was one of the hardest climaxes he ever experienced. His release triggered hers, causing her to fall forward as her pussy gripped his dick. 

He pulled out and immediately disposed of the condom, coming back to help clean up Tasia. 

“That was…different,” she said, using the word in place of something else. He didn’t want his reputation to slacken in that regard, but hell, this whole thing had been a mistake. He still made sure she came twice before he did, but he usually put more oomph into his sexual exploits. 

He usually had Tasia popping her pussy on his face, or contorting her like a pretzel. Now…he was just over it. Over trying to impress someone that wasn’t permanent in his life. That he couldn’t play with whenever he wanted. He was no longer excited at the prospect of making many women cum. He just wanted to make one cum over and over again. He wanted to collect each one like trophies. 

Terry grabbed Tasia’s hand and kissed the back of it. “Forgive me. Tonight should’ve probably been a gym night,” he said. He smiled for good measure, but it was a close-lipped smile.

“Oh, I’m not complaining. That dick still know how to rock my world,” she said. She stood up, pulling on her sweats and sweatshirt, and slipping on her sneakers. He sat down on the bed and watched her, not feeling an ounce of desire. 

She leaned over and grabbed his chin, making him look up at her. “You take care of yourself and whatever or whoever got you in this funk. And if you need more relief, you know my number,” she said.

“Yes, ma’am,” he said with another close-lipped smile. Tasia had been one of his longest play partners, he’d be sorry to see her go. She smiled and gave him a kiss on the cheek, showing herself out. 

Terry sat in his fancy bedroom in his fancy house, staring at the empty archway Tasia disappeared through. His mind and body told him that he was ready for something more. Something tangible. Something he could hold and never let go. He only hoped he found it soon.

You

You clutched your journal to your chest as you sat in Dr. Richmond’s office. Nothing about it had changed except the man himself. He chose to wear a cream colored outfit. A soft, oatmeal colored sweater and khaki pants with white sneakers. His gold rimmed glasses flashed every so often from the light overhead and you couldn’t help catching every single thing about him. If only to distract you from your racing thoughts.

It was one thing to live in your body when you were in the comfort of your own bathroom. Your mind escaped once more, retreated to the safest place you knew. Your knee bounced with nervousness. 

“You don’t have to share if you don’t want to. This is a safe space. It’s your space. You get to decide what we do here,” he said. 

You closed your eyes to the sound of his voice. If he wasn’t so damn helpful, you’d ask for someone else. Literally, anyone else. But he was the first therapist to give you a glimpse of the other side. You wanted that more than you were embarrassed.

“No, I want to share. I need to share,” you said. You licked your lips and then cracked open your journal. You skimmed over things you didn’t want to reveal just yet. Too embarrassing for a second meeting, of course.

“I think…I think my mind is safer. I am constantly on alert that I’m “doing the right thing”, as opposed to what actually makes me happy,” you said. 

When you didn’t say anything, Terry leaned back in his seat. He rolled up his sleeves, revealing the golden brown of his forearms. Your mind emptied of any other thought until he cleared his throat. “Can you expand on that?” 

You looked up into his eyes before heat rushed to your ears. You looked back at your journal, focusing on that rather than his lush, pink lips. 

You told him more about how you reached this conclusion. That there was a standard for being Black that you never quite achieved. That at any moment, multiple mobs of people were coming for your Black card. Or, you were constantly trying to over-achieve at school. You had to work twice as hard, had to be the smartest in the class, because if you came home with a B, your mom went on a long rant about being stupid and never achieving anything real in life. Or how everyone praised you at work for going above and beyond and then got mad when you couldn’t sustain it. You were constantly on the lookout for someone else’s standard.

“I have so many fucking voices in my ear, telling me to do this or do that. And I fucking hate it. Which is wild considering that that’s what I seek in a sexual partner,” you said.

Dr. Richmond smiled and nodded. “Your mind is trying to re-contextualize your upbringing. Being submissive is actually about putting yourself in the position of power. A dom is only as good as how well he treats his sub. It’s about the ultimate act of trust on the submissive’s part,” he explained.

“Yes! And how can I trust that someone isn’t going to…take what I say or want and abuse that or make fun of me for it?” You asked. You played with the corner of your journal, not willing to look at Dr. Richmond. You didn’t need to see the pathetic pity in his steel blue eyes. 

“You have to stand resolute in what you want. You have to recognize that pleasure and sex is about give and take. Trust and acceptance. The right partner isn’t going to make fun of you, abuse you, or rush you,” he said. 

You sighed and leaned back on the brown sofa. You felt like you were chasing a unicorn. What kind of guy was willing to be dominant and care about your needs? Reassure you when you needed and took control when your body sent massive panicked waves at him? Took care of the trust you were placing in him to help you relax and cum? While also being physically attractive to you and have you be attracted to him; not a chubby chaser, not a creep, and not an abuser? 

It was impossible. Hopeless.  

“If you’re comfortable, tell me more about what you found,” he said.

You took your mind off of your dream mystery man. When the fuck was it going to be your turn? 

You scanned your journal once more, noting the sensations about actually living inside your body. “I think when I feel an orgasm approaching, I get scared. And that could be part of why I’m blocking it, but even when I’m alone, I don’t know what it feels like. Or…”

“Or…?” Dr. Richmond prompted. 

You grimaced. Fuck, this was so hard to put into words. Too hard to expose yourself like this. But did you want to reach your sixties, seventies, never having a true orgasm? Never finding your way to actual release? 

“Or, there’s no way to control the orgasm,” you said.

Dr. Richmond nodded. “The goal isn’t to control it, you know,” he said. 

“I know!” You groaned and stood up. You thought better on your feet. Or maybe when you had something to do, you were better able to regulate the jumble of emotions inside of you. No wonder your emotions were all over the place. You spent too long disassociating, too long in your mind and not enough in your body. 

“What benefit do you get from being in control all the time?” The scratch of his pen on the notebook drew your attention to him. To his pretty face, dark eyelashes, and push lips. You watched as he wrote in his notebook. Watched the lines and planes of his gorgeous face. His short curled afro. 

“If I’m in control, if I never look weak or stupid or incompetent, then I win. I win at life. And all my bullies, from school to home are all wrong. There’s nothing wrong with me because I know what to do. I know what to say. I’m not an alien,” you said, taking a deep breath at the revelation.

Whatever your insurance company was paying him, they needed to double it. You admitted things you never had in the past. Your previous therapists attacked your problem sex first, focusing on different methods you could try. Some wanted you to describe, in detail, whatever you did to get yourself off. Safe to say they weren’t practicing ever again. 

“Do you believe there’s something wrong with you?” He asked. He leaned back in his seat, giving you an unflinching stare. His face gave away nothing, revealed nothing, as you thought through his question. 

“All the fucking time. Why else do friends keep leaving me? Or guys don’t want me? Or my mom is…my mom,” you said. 

“Have you considered that you aren’t the problem?” He asked.

“How could I not be? I’m the only common denominator,” you said. You flopped back onto the couch but it wasn’t that soft. It thudded under your weight and you took a deep breath. Fuck, you wanted to cry. Tears pricked your eyes, turning them hot and itchy. You refused to cry in front of this man. 

This strange, quiet man who seemed to read you like one of the many books on his bookshelf. No wonder he had so many degrees. He could drag a full confession from a mute. 

“That may be true. But, bear with me, consider that you aren’t the problem. If you take yourself out of the equation, what are you left with?” He asked. He leaned forward on his desk and the sudden intensity of the question made your mind blank.

You had…nothing. No explanation, no back up. You were used to making yourself the problem. The issue had to be you. If it wasn’t you…

You shrugged your shoulders and looked away from him. The silence stretched on, so quiet you could hear the quiet tick of the clock on the wall. 

“Don’t shy away now, dig into it. If it’s not you, then…?” Dr. Richmond prompted. 

The question only seemed to make you clamp up. Your tongue swelled. Your throat constricted. If it wasn’t you, then what? Everyone was incapable of giving you what you wanted? Everyone just had an agenda against you? Please, that was narcissistic as hell. 

Dr. Richmond stood up from his desk and took off his glasses. He pulled out a drawer and retrieved a glass cleaner cloth. He cleaned his glasses and walked around the front of his desk.

“Consider, for a moment, that other people have deficiencies as well. That people congregate in groups because biologically, it’s safer. We seek groups to be in and when we can’t find one, we tend to think that we’re the problem. That we are outcasts, getting left out to defend ourselves. But all that means is that we haven’t found our group yet. You’re trying to fit a round peg into a square hole. You don’t belong with the squares, so no, you won’t fit in with them. 

“The same goes for sex. Everybody has their preferences. People have their kinks, their needs. When those needs aren’t meant, society teaches us to look at our own deficiencies rather than someone else’s. Perhaps the man you need sexually is far different from the men you take to bed,” he said. He waved around his glasses as he spoke, drawing attention to his massive hands. 

Seriously, they were huge. Like two lion paws that could strike down someone with one hit. He held his glasses by the frame, waving it around delicately as he spoke. You were still paying attention to his words, but fuck…he was unreal. 

“But how do I find the man that I need sexually?” You asked.

Terry

Terry inwardly groaned as you asked him that. Plenty of suggestions came to mind, each too crass to suggest. How could he tell you to go into another man’s arms? How could he send you to another man to unleash that hidden hellcat within you and he wouldn’t get to experience it? 

He needed to end this. End this before it even began. He placed his glasses back on his face and crossed a line that he never thought he would. “I think we have more work to do to adjust the way you think about sex before we get into how you attract what you’re seeking. In fact, I’d suggest you abstain from sex until we get deeper into this,” he said.

“Abstain?” You snorted and he fought a smile. Your face showed absolute disgust, like the mere thought was abhorrent. 

“Abstain. From what you’ve told me and what’s in your file, you jumped from overcoming your initial thoughts and reluctance about sex right to jumping into bed. Without really, truly exploring yourself first. Kids explore their bodies all the time right? They grow conscious of themselves and start thinking about hey, my equipment is different from someone else’s equipment,” he said.

You couldn’t help but giggle and it caused him to smirk in return. Yes, it was silly. Talking about sex was silly. But it was true. “And as you start to notice people that you’re attracted to, you start to grow conscious of hormones in your system. Brain chemistry. All the fun stuff that goes into attraction. You start to touch yourself more, explore your preferences through porn or books or experimentation.”

You cringed when he brought up experimentation. He tilted his head. “Did you go through an experimentation phase?” He asked.

You closed your eyes and sighed as if it were the last question you wanted to answer. You completely fascinated him. He had no idea what would come out of your mouth next. How you would respond to certain questions or ideas. 

He snuck a glance at the clock, he was nearing the end of the session. He flexed his jaw. This was so damn irritating. By the time you were willing to open up, it was time to end it. He wished he could carve out a month of sessions to get you to lower your defenses and let him inside. 

“No? I grew up in the wrong generation. All everyone thought about was sex and while I did too, no one was checking for the fat Black nerds unless it was a prank. And I saw everything as a prank. I was always getting pointed at, made fun of, stared at. Jesus, being exposed fucking sucks! So, no, I didn’t experiment. There was no one to fucking experiment with. 

“And it wasn’t like I could go ten feet from my mom without her up my ass about where I was going. Claiming she just didn’t want me to get snatched when all she really wanted was just to control me. To not let me end up like her. Young and pregnant,” you practically yelled, spewing way more vitriol than he expected.

He figured it was a sore spot for you by the way you grimaced, but he hadn’t been expecting…that. Again, he balled his fists thinking of every person that ever let you down. Every person that was supposed to uplift you, guide you, help you, all dropped the ball in teaching you about self love.

Every experience every kid was supposed to have was denied to you. Instead of being asked out with interest, with sincerity, boys treated it like a prank. He was wild in his youth, he wasn’t always nice to people, or he went through life like a little gremlin. But he liked to think he mellowed somewhat in high school. Treating everyone with respect. From the nerds to the jocks. He didn’t know what not trusting people’s words felt like. Like everything that someone said came laced with poisoned barbs ready to sting. 

“This is so fucking stupid,” you whispered. Your lip trembled but no tears fell down your face. 

Fuck, even now you were trying to hold everything in. Control a natural response to something painful. “When was the last time you cried?” Terry asked.

You stood up and snatched your purse and journal from the couch. “Session’s up, right?” You asked. You avoided looking at him as you rushed to the exit. The faux glass door clanged against the wall as you threw open the door and left, steps echoing on the linoleum flooring. 

He stared at the door as it lazily swung back and he wondered. And he pondered. 

Wheww, need more? The Secret Terry Richmond Files | Part 1

Taglist: You guys, ya'll gon make me cry with this taglist! Thank you!

@planetblaque @chaos-4baby @amethyst09 @ciaqui @we-outsiiiide

@browngirldominion @iv0rysoap @thecookiebratz @harmshake @00aijia00

@judymfmoody @multiversefanfics @tvchi @xo-goldengirl @superhoeva

@avoidthings @lovedlover @blackgurlnhermoods @flydotty @sageispunk

@semi-yah @halfreal-and-halffiction @motheroffae @melaninpov @pinkpantheris

@slutsareteacherstoo @blackerthings @dreamsinfocus @brattyfics @mermaidchansons

@monaeesstuff @henneseyhoe @blowmymbackout @charismablu @playgurlxoxo

@misskiki90 @miyuhpapayuh @satoruya @starcrossedxwriter @yamst3rdamctrl

@steampunkprincess147 @sweettea-and-honeybutter @theblacklewinsky @soft-persephone @notapradagurl

@thegreatlibraryofalex @amyhennessyhouse @hihellogoodbyebruh @becauseimswagman1

[red-lights-of-doooooom]

if that's the fucking case, why would i even use this platform?

mind you, i HATE social media. i hate everything about it. i hate using it. i hate having to keep up. i hate the fact that my autistic ass has no real idea of what's right and wrong, even if i can be good at guessing. i hate the fact that this is unfortunately one of the few ways that i can say something and people won't absolutely rip me to shit if they find out.

girl, i'm just trying to get by. i don't want to say anything racist. i don't wanna be some fucking creep on the internet or whatever. i don't wanna say terrible, hateful things directed at certain groups of people. seriously! i do not want to be a hurtful person in the slightest!

i'm not trying to hurt anybody, okay? well, other than myself, but that's a given. even when i'm at my angriest (or worst), i still TRY to set the bar for myself.

that doesn't mean that i'm not open to criticism. i very much am. i know what is coming my way, and if someone tells me i'm wrong, i'll accept it with grace and just step down quietly, i promise. but you can't ultimately tell other people to shut up if they think this is best for them. at the end of the day, freedom of speech is still important, and i mean that in every sense.

also, sorry that we all can't be master wordsmiths who win people over just like that. believe me, i WISH someone actually gave a fuck about what i wanted to say.

plus, this is way cheaper than therapy. seriously.

look, guys, this may seem ironic coming from a person with Verbose Disease, but I'm about to tell you the secret to winning social media: shutting the fuck up. you have a controversial discourse opinion? shut the fuck up and no one will know. can't participate in a boycott for various reasons? shut the fuck up and no one will know. you think or do something Problematic that has no bearing on anyone but yourself? shut the fuck up and no one will know. you haven't been keeping up on a pressing social issue? shut the fuck up and no one will know. your mind is a wonderful place where you can have all the bad takes in the world and they're all perfectly insulated from everyone and everything unless you try to excise them on a grand scale. you can take the mental L all by yourself without using a public platform as a confession booth and face zero repercussions and it'll be just fine. open up a damn diary and explain yourself there.

[threeacttragedy]

Entry 6 – The One Where I Explained the Claddagh Ring to My Dad

I will preface this entry with an acknowledgement to my father. He is the most intelligent, quick-witted, and level-headed person I know. He’s also a bit of a bitch and tends to be blatantly honest. Sometimes that honesty hurts but it’s also nice to know he’s the one person in this world who won’t feed me a line of bullshit. He is also the best friend we all need.

On October 16, my father called me – like he does almost every day – to chat about, like usual, absolutely nothing. But, on this day, I was quite distracted (because the Time article about Nicola had just come out), which he called me out on almost immediately. Our conversation went something along the lines of:

Dad: “I can tell you’re not paying attention to me.”

Me: “Oh, I’m just reading an article that came out today. Actually, can I ask you a question about it?”

Dad: “Sure.”

Me: “I just want to read something to you, and I want you to tell me what you think this person is saying.”

Dad: “Okay.”

I then proceeded to read him verbatim the snippet from the Times article where Nicola talks about her relationship with Luke.

Me: “What do you think she is saying?”

Dad: “That this person is her best friend, and she thinks very highly of them.”

Me: “Oh, okay.”

Dad: “Why?”

Well, he opened the door so I gave him the backstory. I explained who Nicola and Luke were. I explained Bridgerton. I explained their chemistry during the World Tour. During this 15-or-so-minute conversation, my father took to renaming Nicola “Ireland” and Luke “Thang,” because that’s how he remembers things. Then I brought up the Claddagh ring.

Dad: “Wait. Stop – STOP! – STOP!! I said STOP TALKING! Why didn’t you lead off with this ring? I change my answer. She’s saying she’s in love with this guy!”

Me: “What?”

Dad: “Whatever you read earlier – I change my answer. She’s not saying they’re best friends. She’s saying she’s in love with him.”

Me: “Are you being legit?”

Dad: “Absolutely! Now, go back to the beginning because Ireland and Thang are a thing.”

Welcome aboard the USS Lukola, Daddy.

Recently, this conversation with my father got me thinking about how naïve I have been in believing all Lukolas were aware of the significance of Nicola’s Claddagh. I mean, surely, most of us know the term and meaning of “ring truther,” right?

Maybe not.

I’ve always chucked the Jakolas and A-holes up to be Conscientiously Stupid about the ring – disregarding it because it didn’t fit their narrative. But, shit, maybe they just don’t understand the Holy Grail of the Lukola fandom. So, I figured today, I’d dedicate my entry to explaining the ring to those who have no fucking clue what we mean when we say, “we’ll die on that ring!”

If you don’t want a history lesson or my opinion on the significance of the ring, you can move along and wait for my next post. Otherwise, happy reading. Actually, it’s a rather dull read – but informative. You may just need some caffeine to keep your focus up.

GENERAL HISTORY:

The Claddagh originates from Galway – yes, Nicola’s hometown in Ireland – and has been around for over 400 years. The ring typically shows two hands holding a heart which wears a crown, with the hands symbolizing friendship, the heart signifying love, and the crown representing loyalty.

The way a person wears their Claddagh traditionally signifies their relationship status.

On the RIGHT hand, with the HEART FACING OUTWARD away from your body (and towards your fingertips) means you are single, i.e, your heart is available for love.

On the RIGHT hand, with the HEART FACING INWARD towards your body (and towards the back of your hand), suggests you are in a committed relationship, i.e., your heart is taken.

On the LEFT hand, with the HEART FACING OUTWARD away from your body (and towards your fingertips) means you are engaged.

On the LEFT hand, with the HEART FACING INWARD towards your body (and towards the back of your hand), suggests you are married.

This is not gospel so please do not finish reading this post and start running around in circles, jumping up and down, exclaiming Nicola is married.

NICOLA’S CLADDAGH:

In June, Chupi announced it had designed and created a Claddagh for Nicola and noted “Nicola reached out to Chupi recently and requested a bespoke Claddagh Ring to celebrate the third season of Bridgerton.” Nicola’s ring was custom-made and differs from virtually all other Claddagh rings in that the hands of the ring also display rings of their own.

After creating the ring for Nicola, Chupi continued to sell it through its website, noting that the heart-shaped diamond in the ring was “[h]eld in a pair of hands that honor friendship and strength, with the left hand wearing a North Star signet ring.” In its original description, and for four months following this initial announcement, Chupi never explained the meaning of the ring on the right hand holding the diamond. We will speculate on that in a moment. Further, Chupi explained that the three diamonds in the crown “represent the traditional emblem of loyalty and also symbolize the past, present & future, along with a nod to the fact this is the 3rd season of Bridgerton.” There’s that Bridgerton reference again.

Now, let’s break down the hands holding the heart-shaped diamond, starting with the left hand.

The left hand is wearing a signet ring. This one is easy to explain because Chupi described the ring the left hand is wearing for us. It is the North Star signet ring, which Chupi sells through its website as its “North Star Diamond Original Signet Ring.” Chupi explained that the ring represented “True North.” What is “true north?” Besides its literal meaning, the phrase “true north” represents your “internal compass or your personal calling” and “your authentic self.”

The right hand is wearing a ring on its middle finger. This ring has always been a bit of a conundrum. As mentioned above, Chupi never explained this ring in its original description. In fact, it remained silent on its significance until November 1. And, even after it “explained away” the middle finger ring in an Instagram story (which disappeared after 24 hours), Chupi never updated its website to confirm its meaning. Why? Well, you’ll find that most “ring truthers” believe it’s because this middle finger ring represents Luke. Luke often wears a ring on his middle right finger. In fact, in his People spread for Sexiest Man Alive released November 14, he’s seen wearing a ring on his right-hand middle finger. You can also find him wearing a ring on his right-hand middle finger throughout the Bridgerton Season 3 World Tour.

But, let’s pretend for a moment that the rings on the two hands holding the diamond heart have no significance whatsoever. That does not negate the fact the ring was made as a nod to Bridgerton Season 3. Yes, the season that both Nicola and Luke repeatedly described during interviews throughout the World Tour as their “shared experience.”

To round out this little “history lesson,” and just so I am completely up front, on November 1, 2024, Chupi reshared to its IG stories a story shared by Ashley McDonnell explaining that the right-hand middle finger ring on the Chupi-branded Claddagh represented “power” (basically, women’s empowerment). As of that date, Chupi had also removed all mentions of Bridgerton from its Claddagh ring descriptions and left only a reference to the rings being “inspired by” Nicola. However, the Claddagh could still be found under Chupi’s “Engagement” ring section and the articles titled, “Designing a Chupi Claddagh Ring for Nicola Coughlan” and “What Way to Wear a Claddagh Ring” still, to this day, reside under its “News” section. These articles still reference the ring’s ties to the third season of Bridgerton.

A BUNCH OF POINTS I’M TRYING TO MAKE:

Point 1: Nicola had the ring commissioned herself, per Chupi. We can surmise she understands the meaning of the ring based on her Irish (and Galway) heritage; thus, we can also deduce she knows the meaning behind how it is worn.

Point 2: The ring is important to Nicola. I’m not even going to use disclaiming phrases like “may be” or “seems to be;” I’m just flat out stating the “ring IS important” to her. She has been seen wearing it a lot in her personal time. In fact, on September 20, she was photographed wearing the Claddagh during the Gucci afterparty, which means she took off the “workday” jewelry she had been wearing earlier in the day to put the Claddagh back on her finger. She has not been shy about flashing it in public. From her Chupi articles to her Tatcha stories to wearing it in public (at concerts, walking about).

Point 3: Based on comments made by Chupi on June 25 in its article titled, “Designing a Chupi Claddagh Ring for Nicola Coughlan,” it took four weeks “from a sketch to sparkling reality” to make the ring. This means, at the latest, it had to have been commissioned by May 9, 2024. However, some Lukola sleuths have stated the metadata they pulled from the sketches uploaded by Chupi indicate it was as early as April 26 (don’t even side eye me; I didn’t pull that shit). Based on this information, the ring was likely commissioned during and/or between the World Tour stops in Australia and Italy.

Point 4: Nicola wore the ring publicly as early as June 6 during the Dublin premiere. At that time, she wore it on her right-hand middle finger with the heart facing inwards. The way she wore the ring was also evidenced the following day in Galway by way of pictures in Chupi’s article titled, “What Way to Wear a Claddagh Ring.”

Point 5: Nicola flashed that glittering baby in her June 15 Tatcha IG post (I’m convinced that post holds so many secrets) and continued to wear it throughout the summer months (on her right-hand middle finger) as evidenced by pictures of her at the Taylor Swift Eras tour and in her August 1 Tatcha IG post. And, let’s round out the summer with her displaying the ring in her September 17 Tatcha IG stories, on September 20 during the Gucci afterparty, and in Alex Babsky’s September 25 IG post about Nicola being “in London today.”

Point 6: On October 1, Nicola had seemingly switched her diamond Claddagh from her right hand to her left-hand middle finger as exhibited in her Choose Love IG story. This switch was further indicated (but not confirmed because she conveniently put her caption over it) in her October 5 airplane IG story (deduced from the small gold band switching to her right hand) and in pap pictures of her published on October 8. On October 11, when she posted her Olaplex IG story, it appeared the ring was on her left-hand ring finger. We can also barely see the ring in the October 21 “Polin” picture; however, it cannot be determined if it is on her left-hand middle or ring finger. We haven’t seen her “out in the wild” since so the current status of her ring is not known, but we can probably safely assume she’s still wearing it, with the heart facing in.

Point 7: I believe everyone needs to make their own decision as to whether the right hand of the Claddagh – the one wearing the middle finger ring – represents Luke. Personally, I believe it does, but it is perfectly fine if you disagree. It could very well be a "power move." I’ve always believed the left hand of the Claddagh – the one wearing the North Star signet ring – represented “true north,” or Nicola’s internal compass to choose her own path. But, please do not let my opinion cloud your own.

Point 8: Regardless of your opinion about the hands holding the Claddagh’s heart-shaped diamond, the ring was acknowledged to represent Bridgerton Season 3 and that has Luke all over it.

Point 9: From Day 1, Nicola has worn the Claddagh with the heart facing inwards, meaning her heart is taken. To the best of my knowledge, this has never changed.

MY THOUGHTS:

First and foremost, Nicola has told the world her heart is taken.

Based on the above, why would Nicola wear that ring for anyone but Luke?

My father’s response: “She wouldn’t.”

Why? Because it would be fucking weird if she did.

Let’s play pretend for a moment.

You’re dating Nicola (and, NO, you can’t be Luke in this scenario). You’ve watched Nicola’s Bridgerton press tour for the past, say, six months. You’ve watched her flirt with Luke. You’re fully aware Lukolas ship her with Luke. In fact, you’re aware several of her castmates and crew ship her with Luke. You’re aware that, by the end of the World Tour, interviewers were getting bold enough to ask Nicola and Luke about their “friendship” because they, too, were intrigued by their chemistry. You’re also aware that, “People want [her] to marry Luke.” And, you’re fully aware that Nicola had that Claddagh ring made to, at a minimum, remind her of Bridgerton Season 3, the season she shared with Luke.

Would you be okay with her wearing THAT ring to signify the state of YOUR relationship with her?

If you are, get the fuck off my page.

Now, riddle me this, Batman –

Why was this ring made during the World Tour? And, more importantly, why was it worn during the World Tour?

Why did Luke and Nicola take a special trip to Galway? And (purely speculation here), why did the meeting with Nicola’s mum seem so emotional?

Why did the ring switch hands?

Why, Batman, why?

[yuwuta]

HOW DID YOU GET USED TO THE HAUNTING, THE WILLING, THE MISSING, THE WANTING — YUUTA OKKOTSU

content, warnings. more of the knight yuuta universe yippee. i got an ask about telling him he’d make a good prince and flustering him, and that struck something in me, though this interpretation of that ask is probably a bit darker/more serious than envisioned... i will publish the ask w the other version of this scenario too. unfortunately for everybody involved i was a theater kid and i did listen to cell block tango and the first half of hamilton before i had this idea </3 i’m sorry if you can tell

more notes. set in the same universe as this drabble, which are all set in the same universe as a full fic draft i have and would love to finish some day lol. anyway, say hello to the gojo of this au 

You are not ready to be queen. As much as you resent your mother, your father, the elders in the cabinet, the system you were raised in—as much as you wish to be a ruler that creates change and peace in your court and kingdom, you know that you are not ready to hold that position. 

It shows now more than ever, with your parents being escorted to a neighboring kingdom for a meeting, and you in charge of the harvest ball. There is china to be chosen, silverware to be polished, candlesticks to be blessed, gowns to be sewn, a menu to be curated, a ballroom to be prepared—and you are sorely behind on all of your duties. 

A lackluster princess does not make for a promising queen. And distractions do not help you become anything of yourself. 

“I do not have time to discuss the lilies Sir Gojo. I am aware they are drooping and that they are your favorite, but I do not control the weather,” you sigh, handing back a scroll to a maid before turning to your head knight.

“That sounded very queenly, my little lady! You’ve been practicing,” he towers above you, with a growing smile and little care for your position. He bends forward to press the tip of his gloved pointer finger to your nose, “I too mourn the lilies, but I am afraid I agree: we have much more pressing matters to discuss. Come along, shall we?” 

You’ve learned to be wary of Sir Gojo’s words over the years. He often leads with a false timbre, or makes otherwise simple conversation into a riddle for his own amusement. Even as you’ve learned when to ignore his games, you’ve also grown appreciative of his light demeanor, and his insistence on speaking to you directly, rather than shielding you away. 

You take his arm, looping yours through his, and allow him to lead you down the courtyard steps and into the grand garden. You put your trust in him, allowing your feet to follow the path he sets, and letting your mind wander. You wonder whether you should set the gold or bronze-trimmed plates for the ball, if the curtains should remain closed or open, if the embossed or embellished silverware would leave a better impression on your guests. 

“Princess?” your knight calls for you. You focus your attention back to him, apologizing for your lapse in attention. 

You expect a smile, perhaps another press to your nose and a light scolding, but Gojo’s expression is much more neutral. “Sir?”

“I said that Lord Hajime is dead. His court will send a representative to the harvest ball, but how would you like to proceed?” 

“Dead?” your breath hitches momentarily, “Was he unwell?” 

“I do not know. The letter gave no detail. I believe the court sent an apology for not being able to deliver a suitor as promised. The family wishes to keep this private until after the harvest.” 

When you look up to him, you see no mischief in his expression. He’s serious, and you feel lightheaded, warm, and icy all at once. “I see,” you say, and pull away from Gojo’s arm, “Excuse me. I—I need a moment to myself.”

“You are sick? So suddenly?” Gojo asks, turning with your body so that his back is never to you.

“No—I… I… I need to be alone,” you confess, wrapping your arms around themselves, curling into your own body. Gojo stands firm, a short nod in understanding. He raises his hand to make a signal; an order for the knights on the periphery who can see but not hear. 

You smile, small, grateful for him. “Please, arrange our finest favors, and ask Ieiri for her favorite elixir.” 

Gojo’s smile reflects yours, albeit stained with more sympathy. “Of course.” 

“And tell the maids that I shall postpone the table placements until tomorrow morning. Should you find yourself with time to spare, let me know if you prefer the bronze to gold trim.” 

Gojo nods, taking a half-step to stand in front of you. In times like these, you feel like the little princess under his watch and care from when you were younger. His presence is frightening, overwhelming, and yet, more comforting and welcoming than your own parents. 

Carefully, he leans down to whisper, “Yuuta and his fleet have not yet returned, he will not be in the knight’s chambers. I will send him to you when he arrives.” You blink in sudden awe, and Gojo smiles, reaches for your hand and raises it to his lips to press a chaste kiss, “Do not regret too long, princess.” 

You hear him before you see him. It’s a bad habit for a knight, you think; you can always hear or feel where Yuuta is, even if you can’t see him. You think he ought to be more stealthy, more secretive, quieter; but then again, you don’t. He reserves plenty of stealth for his motives, stores plenty of secrets in his mind, keeps his words quiet or has a way of keeping other people’s quiet. 

The throne room is cold. It’s your least favorite room in the castle, but tonight, you hope it inspires you.

You don’t sit on your throne, you don’t sit on your mother’s or your father’s; you don’t sit at all. You stand, at the top of the stairs, staring at the seats and the tapestry and the paintings of your forefathers that decorate the backdrop. Behind you, at the base of the stairs, Yuuta kneels. You don’t need to see him to know; you can feel it on your palms with your hands behind your back; you can see it in the eyes of your grandfather’s portrait, you can hear it in the way his knee hits the carpet. 

“You may stand.” 

“I shouldn’t, my lady,” Yuuta replies, “Not here.” 

“You do many things you shouldn’t,” you sigh, steady, “Stand, Yuuta.” 

You hear the metal of his armor rustle against itself. You can feel when he stands; it feels like he’s right behind you, even though you know he’s ten steps below you. 

You inhale, slowly; exhale, slowly. Clench your hands behind your back, and then relax your shoulders the way you’ve seen your grandfather do. Then, you speak. “Lord Hajime is dead.” 

You turn, slowly, and wait until your cape has finished its turn, has settled behind you again before you speak again; a tactic your grandmother was fond of. “Lord Hajime is dead,” you repeat, “He is dead, and I asked you not to kill him.” 

Yuuta looks up to you. Neck craned, hands neatly behind his back, his helmet on the carpeted floor to his left. He does not look small. 

You take a step downwards. “I said this is not how I wanted matters to be resolved.” Another step down, a pause, then repeat, “I said that I do not wish to resort to violence.” Another step down, a pause, “To resort to murder.” Another step down, hurried, “I stood under my balcony,” another step, “and I told you not to murder Lord Hajime. I told you not to kill him,” another step; a pause, hysterical, “And yet Lord Hajime is dead. He is dead because—”

“I did not kill him.”

You pause your descent, four steps above Yuuta. You are only half a head taller than him like this. At this distance you can see the gray of his irises, wide and speckled with brown, without a shred of remorse pooling within them. It makes you sneer. 

“You expect me to believe that it is a coincidence that a fortnight after I catch you on your way to murder Lord Hajime, that he dies?” you question, rhetorical, “I am naive, but I am not a fool, Yuuta.” 

“You are no fool, my princess, and Lord Hajime was no saint,” Yuuta shakes his head, “He was a tyrant. He took three wives prior and treated them all as whores. He alone was responsible for the destruction of the crops in the north. He had only himself to blame.” Yuuta pauses, and you see something melt behind steely eyes. “It was a murder, yes, but not a crime.”

Yuuta’s lips wobble slightly, but the rest of him remains upright. It always goes like this: first his head, then his heart, then his body following—in everything he does. You blink, slowly, and take another step down; eye-level with Yuuta at this height. 

“You did not kill him,” you repeat, leveled with revelation, “You just gave the order.” 

Yuuta’s eyelids fall slowly, then his head follows in a shallow nod. He keeps his neck bent, keeps his head hung in front of you. You sigh. 

“Who was it this time,” you ask. He does not raise his head; you do not wait for him to speak, you dip your head so that your lips are level with his ears. “Megumi? Surely he would have hated the way Lord Hajime treated his livestock. Maybe Yuuji—he has been impatient to prove himself since recovering from his last injury. Or perhaps Toge, he would’ve done it swiftly in his sleep, without a sound.”

Yuuta keeps his gaze on the floor, keeps his words quiet. “Nobara.” 

“Dame Nobara, who strives to replace you as my first blade?” you question, “What, as some kind of test of loyalty to you?” 

Yuuta raises his head, eyes stern, brows drawn. “No, princess. To you.” 

You freeze. Your anger flares, and then subsides to only weak embers as you understand Yuuta’s motives, and Sir Gojo’s final words to you. You’re careful when you reach forward to brush your knuckle against Yuuta’s cold cheek, only the kiss of a touch between your finger and his face; even, still, he shudders, and you watch him melt from head to toe; from his eyebrows to his eyes to his lips to his shoulders to his knees. 

“You are disobedient, and indignant, and ruthless,” you list, voice soft, touch softer as you allow your fingers to graze the top of his ears, adoring the flush that follows, “And kind, and careful, and charming.”

You watch the color stain Yuuta’s cheeks and his ears, you revel in the pout on his lips, and the effort of his breathing. You only wish he were this easy to tame all the time. 

Still, he precious to you, so you are careful when you raise your opposite hand to his face, taking advantage of the difference in your status and stature to tilt his head upwards, lean down and press your words against his cheek, “You would make for a lovely prince,” you tell him, “The people would love you. Our enemies would fear you. The soldiers would respect you.” The kisses between your sentences are featherweight, trailed from the high point of his cheekbone to the corner of his lips.

You can feel him quiver when you pull back, moving a palm back to his cheek to pinch his skin between your thumb and forefinger, “If only you knew how to listen.” 

Yuuta winces, but he does not pull away. He parts his lips to steady his breath, and then to speak, strained, “Please, princess. Have mercy.” 

And for the first time in a fortnight you smile, watching splotched skin stain your knight’s cheeks when you soften your hold on him. You pull Yuuta’s head up further, lean yours down for a careful kiss; short, chaste, the kind you know he hates the most. 

“Oh, Yuuta,” you coo, grazing your thumb against his face, endeared by his wide eyes and quiet whimpers, “This is mercy.”

[spidybaby]

Ladyyyy✨ You can't just leave us like that after that amazing angst😭😭😭 can you do a part 2, pls? Like what happens after that? How does he react? What about Aurora and his family? Can we see Reader moving on? They end up being strangers? Reader can't forgive that😭😭😭

Take care of yourself, hope you have a great day!🌻🫶🏻

Seat 332 | Part Two

Summary: The time apart and the difference between his past life and his present makes Gavi realize that he lost.

Warnings: cursing.

Part one

That was your seat. He knows it, his family knows it, and even his friends. Why was she in your seat?

Pablo's eyes move from you and to Antonella and back to you. He even stopped clapping. You are looking at the back of Antonella's head.

He asked Aurora to keep that seat empty in case you came to see him. Anto was waving at him with a smile on her face.

"Venga Gavi!" Balde says, smiling at him at hugging him. "Vamoooos!" He yells.

Gavi is being moved by Cubarsi and Balde, who grab his arms and pull him to the chanting group of fans.

He turns for a few seconds, smiling at the feeling of being back. Soon, that's overturned by the feeling of worry when he doesn't see you standing at the entrance of the palco.

"Wait, guys." He tries to free himself. "Wait, I need to go."

He pulls stronger and free himself. He walks quickly to the entrance, but in the way he finds Iñigo's arms.

"Venga, Chaval!" Iñigo smiles as he grabs Gavi in his arms. He's strong enough to carry Gavi back into the chanting group.

"Madridista el que no salte." They all yell in catalan, jumping and being happy.

Gavi gives up, he won't be able to free himself from his friends. He will call you as soon as he's done with it.

The celebration goes on for a few minutes. The social media team asks for him to greet his family and friends on the field for content on his docuseries on the new barca app.

He can't help but miss you during that greeting. You were a complementary piece on his recovery. You were the missing piece now.

He's awkward when he's with Anto. If someone had told him that he would be giving empty kisses to the girl, he promised himself to be different. He wouldn't have believed it.

Once he is back in the dressing room, he takes the pictures the social media girl asks for. He showers quickly and runs to where his family is waiting for him.

"I just need to make a call, go on, and go back to my place." He says to his parents. "Here's the key. Just give me a couple minutes."

"I'll wait with you." Antonella says.

"No!" Lift his head up. "I mean, you don't have to wait. Helo me with everything at home, please." He smiles.

She nods, going back to his parents and telling them that she will help them at home while Aurora stays with Gavi.

"Me cago en la puta." He says, not finding his phone.

"Pablo, what are you doing?" Aurora asks, watching him being all desperate.

He throws his toiletry bag on the seat of his car. He's stressed. "Give me your phone." He orders.

Aurora shakes her head no. Crossing her arms in front of her chest.

"Aurora, I'm not playing." He says. "Give me the damn phone."

"What for?" She asks, mad at his brother's attitude. "Who's that important for you to be acting this way?"

"I need to call Y/n." He whines. "Please."

Aurora sighs. "Pablo, let's go home. Antonella and everybody else is waiting."

"Qué me importa un cajaro, Aurora." He yells. "I need to call her."

Aurora knows that if he does that, then it will become a big problem. Pablo will need to explain why he was with Antonella and you at the same time.

"Why don't you calm down and call her tomorrow?" She asks. "She's mad, and she won't answer like that."

He knows that you won't answer him in that state, but he also wants to know you are okay. He needs to explain to you that he did save the seat for you.

That's your seat.

Antonella didn't have any business seating there.

"Fine." He says, getting in the car.

Even if he wants to, his mind is full of worry about you. He can't focus on the conversations without disassociate after a few words.

Aurora excused him, saying it was just him being tired and that he had run out of battery after waiting for this game for so long.

The night wasn't easy. Aurora took his phone and asked him to wait. He needs to respect the fact that Antonella was in the house.

He asked Antonella to join Aurora in her room for the night. He was tired and didn't feel like talking or being with anyone.

He looked over at the clock every five minutes. The hours felt eternal. Why can't the time go faster?

You usually wake up at seven to go to the club and play tennis. He wants to call you before that. He tried to call you, and the first two calls went to voice mail.

The third time is a charm, he thinks, but it hit him with a message. He frowns. Did your phone die?

He googles what that message means because you had a voice recording for your voice mail. He sweats cold when he discovers that you blocked his number for calls and texts.

He wakes up, finding Aurora in the kitchen. "Hey, I need your phone." He says, not wanting to waste time.

"Pablo, what for?" She asks, still a little bit sleepy.

"Y/n is not answering my calls, I need to call her from your phone."

Aurora roll her eyes, she's tired of all this hit and run you two have. If it's not you complaining that Pablo is ghosting you, it's him complaining that you don't answer.

"No!" She says, passing away from him.

Pablo is quick and grabs his arm. "What do you mean no?"

She removes Gavi's arm. Looking at him like he's asking something crazy. "Pablo, I'm done with this situation. You tell me that you want to be with Antonella, but then you tell me that you need to contact Y/n. What are you playing, Gavi?"

She's not wrong, Gavi told her that he's done with Y/n, ask Aurora to help him with Antonella. Then he goes and says he needs you and that he needs to help her reconnect with you.

"I'm done with this stupid situation you got yourself into." She says. "If you want to call Y/n, then find other ways, but my phone is not up for use."

Pablo is left alone in the kitchen. The question that Aurora made him is still ringing in his head.

"What game are you playing, Gavi?"

fcbarcelona

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fcbarcelona Everybody stay calm, it's happening 😱

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aurorapaezg ❤️

antogmz 🥺❤️

gavixpedri tell me it's all a lie 😭😭😭

gavirafan06 @gavixpedri what's happening? 🤨

gavixpedri @gavirafan06 barca admin posted a video of gavi and this girl kissing 🙃

gavimylover so he's not y/n's boyfriend?

barcam3ssi10 I would have swear they were together 🤨 people on x were saying they saw them holding hand in Barcelona

Pedri Bienvenido hermano 💪🏻

randomuser1 I come to the comments and see his fans fighting over who's the girlfriend and who's the other girl 😭😭😭 why are we so unserious?

randomuser2 like fr who tf is hotter? That's the winner

- A month after Gavi's return -

fcbarcelona

Liked by antogmz, mario_rzs and 1,093,834 others

fcbarcelona Another day, another Gavi pic 📸

View all 2,274 comments

antogmz ❤️💪🏻

randomuser83 I wonder if she's the responsible one for him and his ex gf break up🤔

antoxgavi @randomuser83 she's not, that girl was Gavi's friend

ansucheesefan but Y/n follows her, so I don't think they are beefing if they follow each others

gavirafan06 he has the girlfriend glow up 🤩

antofan1 he definitely has that glow 🥺🥰

pedrimasiafan I think it's sweat 👀

randomuser1 why are his fans fighting in the comments over his love life again 😭😭😭 we are so unserious I can't

- Two months after Gavi's return -

yourusername

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yourusername ˚˖𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒✧˚.🎀༘⋆

View all 238 comments

aurorapaezg I miss you so much 🥺❤️

camihdz Miss you 🙃

yourusername open the door 👀❤️

gavifan2 why don't you answer Aurora's comment?

aurorafan1 I miss you and Aurora 😔💔

mario_rzs send me the pics maybe?

yourusername sir, I don't know you 😔

aurorapaezfan why is she answering everybody's comment but Aurora's? 😭😭😭

- Three months after Gavi's return -

yourusername

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yourusername I'm working late, cause I have finals (send help)

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aurorabelen9 Te extraño, mi niña❤️ liked by author

aurorafan1 I can't 😭 she's the only Gavira that Y/n follows

gavimylover miss seeing y/n with the paez gavira family 😔💔

antoxgavi why did you unfollow Anto and Aurora? You just create drama by doing that

pedrixgavifan stop asking her about Gavi or his family 😒 if she's not friends with them, then it's her business liked by author

antoxgavi @pedrixgavifan well she used to post a ton with them and now she expects people to not care?

lamasiafan6 what college is she on? Cause why are the skeletons on the gym? 💀

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"Let's go play some tennis." You say to your friend Camila.

You two walk to the tennis field, preparing the balls and everything for the small match. You missed playing tennis.

Since you stopped having contact with Gavi, you started doing the activities you left behind. You only had time to play tennis early in the morning because he always came after training and you needed to be there for him.

You stopped going out with your friends because he was over at your house and you wanted to spend all night with him.

Then, with his injury, you became a big help to his parents. When they needed to go back to Sevilla, you took care of Pablo.

Only leaving his side to go to class or to study for your tests. You were there for him in every step of the way.

You can't really put the blame on Pablo. He was right, he never asked you to do all that.

He never asked you to stop going out.

He never asked you to stop playing your favorite sport.

He never asked you to play nurse Nancy and help him.

He never asked you to help him with his recovery exercise.

You did it all by heart.

And that was something you won't regret. You did it without looking for a reward or a prize. You did it because you loved him, and you prioritized him when he needed you the most.

You were slowly recovering your life. You didn't depend on anyone, you don't wait on others, you care about yourself and other but always putting you first.

You can't deny that the fact that your so called friends decided to take sides on the situation between Pablo and you, it hurted you.

You noticed that only Mario was your friend. He told you that he wasn't going to take sides and that he was there for you whenever you needed to.

You are grateful Camila never left you. She knew Pablo since school, but she was your friend. Even tho if Pablo comes to her, she wouldn't ignore it.

What hurt you the most was that Aurora lied to you. She could have told you the truth, even if that was going to hurt you.

You asked her, and she chose to act like nothing happened. She expected you to go to the dinner and see for yourself that he was with someone.

You didn't fight. You didn't argue. You just left her alone. She commented on your posts and answered your Insta stories.

You didn't even open her past messages. You made it silently clear that you weren't going to engage on anything that had to do with her.

Belen and Pablo sir were other story. They called you and asked you if you were okay because you didn't come to the game.

You explain to them that you and Pablo weren't together anymore and that you don't want his girlfriend to feel weird about your presence.

They told you that no matter if you and Pablo were together, you were welcome to come and visit them, to come for lunch, dinner, or any kind of meal you want.

Belen asked you if you were coming to see her, you did. When Gavi was training and Aurora was in Sevilla. You visit her, telling her that you will be one call away.

You miss them. They were the closest thing to a family. And you'll miss having them around, hearing their jokes, their company.

You can't change what Gavi did. Nor you want to do it. You just hate to lose so much as a consequence of him.

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You noticed Aurora send you a dm. You open it just because.

You close the app, leaving her on read. You want to answer her and make things they way they used to, but you hate liars, and she was one.

It took you a lot of mind and thinking to finally come around the idea of losing the life you thought you'll always have.

It was your fault for thinking that something with no label would end up in a fairy tale story with a happy ending.

"Hey, let's go get sushi. It's on me." You smile at Cami.

˚˖𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒✧˚.🎀༘⋆

"Do you want to see a movie?" Antonella asks Pablo.

They were coming back from a "date night" as she called. But to Gavi, it was more like another dinner he spent watching his phone and hearing about Antonella's friends.

"I want to see this movie that's on Netflix." She smiles. "It's called Bride Wars."

Pablo turns his head to her. He knows that movie, maybe a little too well.

"I mean, if you want." He shrugged, laying down on the couch.

Anto takes the opportunity and lays down with him. He moves a little, uncomfortable with the closeness.

He likes the movie, he can't even deny it. It's your favorite movie. You two would watch it a lot during his recovery.

You know the funny parts, you quote the dialogue and even once mentioned that you would throw him a party like the Bachelorette party they have.

"You don't alter the Vera Wang to fit you. You alter yourself to fit Vera." He says, chuckling at that part.

"Do you know the movie?" Antonella says, pausing it.

He nods. "I mean, it's a movie." He says like it's obvious.

"Oh, I know." She giggles. "But it's a girls movie."

He frowns, not understanding what she meant. "No, it's not." He scuffs. "Plus, it's funny because she was eating butter from all around the world."

"It's a romcom, Gavi." She says, obnoxious tone. "Romcoms are for girls. Just like fast and furious is for boys."

He rolls his eyes at her. Grabbing the remote and pressing play again. He is going to enjoy the rest of it.

Antonella knows she fucked up. When Gavi sees or she does something he doesn't like. He gives her the silent treatment.

That makes her nervous, because all she wants is for him to be fine and happy with her. "Do you want me to make dinner?" She asks.

Gavi doesn't answer, he keeps watching the movie. She waits a few minutes and asks again.

"I can make you a sandwich, would you like that?"

He sighs, looking at her. "Can you make me a grilled cheese?" He asks.

Antonella nods excited, she gets up and walks to the kitchen, ready to prepare his sandwich. If only she knew that it was because of him that he had asked that.

< "Pablo, please calm down." You say, trying to find a way of calming him down.

Pablo was having a panic attack from the pain he's feeling. Even if his surgery was two weeks ago, he made a bad move with his leg and provoked a strong pain.

"I don't want to feel this way anymore." He says, sobbing. "Make it stop." He yells.

You don't know what to do. Aurora and Belen were outside, and you don't know how to deal with this alone. You never had one nor did any close friend or family member, so you are lost.

"Pablito, mirame." You grab his wet cheeks. "Can you breathe with me?" You press a little more onto his cheeks to get his attention.

You began doing these breathing exercises. Counting for him to breathe and exhale. You do different rounds of this in order for him to calm down.

Once he's calmer, you grab his pain meds and pass him the water. "Drink this, vida." You say, grabbing the glass of water and grabbing the straw, placing it to his lips.

His puffy eyes and red cheeks make him look like a kid. He's trying not to cry again. The effects of the strong medicine were quick to ease the pain he was feeling.

"I'm sorry, Pablo." You say, leaving the glass back on the nightstand, combing his hair. "I don't know how to take your pain away." You confess. "But I'm here for you, and I won't leave you alone."

He grabs your hand, placing it against his hot cheek. You know it his way of saying thank you. He's not the best at expressing his emotions, and this little acts of love are for him a way of showing that he's thankful when words are not coming out.

You spend another moment combing his hair. You were quiet, listening to the sobs that he still makes from how hard he was crying.

You bring your intertwine hands to your mouth, leaving a kiss on his skin. He smiles a little. "Don't cry, mi amor." You say sweetly. It's like talking to a little child. "I'm going to bring you your favorite pasta. Your mom made it for you because she knows that with a little bit, you would feel good." You tell him.

He shakes his head no, the grip on your hand becomes stronger. He pouts while looking at you with those puppy eyes you can't say no to.

"Amor, you need your medicine." You explain to him. "I'll just grab us a plate of pasta, and I'll be back. Five minutes."

"I-" He tries to say, being interrupted by a sob. "I don't want pasta."

You smile at him. "Do you want me to make you a sandwich?" You ask, knowing that he has to take another dosis of medicine and that he needs to eat before doing so. "I can you make an amazing grilled cheese."

He looks at you with doubt, but after a moment, he agrees. Kissing your hand and letting it go. You promise that you will be as quick as possible.

You prepared two sandwiches, one for you and one for him. You side his food with some fruit and some juice. He loves juice.

You can say that you beat your own speed record because in no time you were back in the room with him.

"I got you your favorite juice, Pablito." You say, placing the tray in front of him. "And I just remembered that Bride Wars it's still available." You bop his nose, making him smile.

You take a look at his face, the way his eyes are shining, and the way he's calmer and relaxed, demeanor gives you peace.

"Mirame." You say, grabbing his cheeks and caressing his skin. "I know it's hard, amor. But I'm here for you in every step of the way." You kiss the top of his nose.

You sea next to him in bed, always keeping a distance because you were afraid of hurting you. You eat in silence because of the movie.

"Can you get me napkin or a piece of paper?" He asks, making you nod.

You get up and walk to the bathroom, grabbing some paper because it is quicker than going into the kitchen.

"You don't alter the Vera Wang to fit you." You say at the same time as the movie dialogue. "You alter yourself to fit Vera." You imitates the voice.

"What to boys learn in school?" He finishes the dialogue, smiling.

You pass him the paper, fixing a string of hair on the way. You feel better now that he is feeling no pain and is eating. >

He goes out of this trance when Antonella places the plates in front of him. The sandwich looks weird to say the least.

"I tried, okay." She says, giggling. "Don't judge me, try it."

He does it, he takes a bite of the sandwich. "I mean, it's something." He smiles at her.

He doesn't want to make her feel bad, so he eats it all. Drinking the disgusting so-called juice she did.

"I love spending time with you." She says, kissing his lips. "Love you."

He half smiles. "Thank you." He says, patting her head. "Let's keep watching, I love that part."

˚˖𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒✧˚.🎀༘⋆

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"Do you want to try this?" You ask your cousin.

You two were having lunch with her. You love spending time with your family now that you are on vacations.

You came back to Sevilla, changing the routine a little bit. You used to stay in Barcelona because Gavi wanted you there.

And of course you chose to stay with him while everybody else was on vacations. You were waiting for him to come back from training.

You two finish your meals, happy that you got to spend time together and got to talk about all the things you needed to talk about.

You two walk back to your place, since you guys were neighbors it was funny to go everywhere together.

"Okay, see you later." You say, leaving your cousins at the door of the house.

You enter your home, lay on the couch and turn the TV on. You were too full to mind anything else.

After an hour and a quick nap, you hear the doorbell, you call your mom, telling her that you are opening the door. When you do, you find someone you didn't want to see.

"Aurora, hi." You say with a weird smile you face. "How are you?"

"I'm good, been better." She says. "I was worried about you." She confess.

You frown. "About me?" You ask. "Why?"

"Why?" She asks you back, looking at you like you just say something illogical. "Y/n, you don't answer my text, you don't answer my calls, you even unfollow me from social media." She says, naming all the things you stopped doing. "It's like I'm not even your friend anymore."

She has one hand on your arm, making the scene look a lot more dramatic than what it is. It feels like one of those simulations.

You look at her directly in the eyes. Trying to find out what she was asking was with concern or just because.

"Aurora," you say, grabbing her arm and moving it away from you. "You are not my friend."

She blinks a couple of times, confused about your reaction. She knows she was a little bit wrong by sticking to Pablo and Antonella, but she was his sister.

"What?" She asks, confused. "Y/n, that's not true. I'm your friend."

You shake your head lightly. You can't even believe that she thinks she's your friend after everything she did.

"I asked you if Pablo was seeing someone." You remind her. "And what did you do? You lie to me."

"Y/n, that's not -"

"That's not true?" You ask, scuffing. "Aurora, you knew he was seeing her. You knew Pablo had other intentions with her, and what did you do? You lied."

She shakes her head. "That's not what happened." She tries to explain.

"You knew I loved Pablo." You remind her. "When you asked me what my feelings were about your brother, I told you I loved him."

"Y/n, I -"

"You knew, and you chose to lie to me."

She sighs, "You have everything mixed."

"No." You say, stern tone. "I have my facts straight. The only thing I got mixed was that I thought you were my friend. You are not, so leave me alone!"

You close the door of your house without caring that you're literally closing the door on her face. She didn't care about you, and you don't care about her at all.

You want to open the door and ask her for forgiveness because you closed the door on her face, but you won't do it.

You have to remember that Aurora chose to lie to you. She could've been honest, you would've prefer that.

Instead, she knew Pablo didn't want you at the dinner. She knew Pablo had her over. She knew that girl was in his life.

You take a deep breath and walk to your room, wanting you to go back to sleep and forget that you have to deal with the broken pieces that he left.

˚˖𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒✧˚.🎀༘⋆

"What do you mean you can't keep seeing me?" Antonella yelled. "Pablo, what is wrong with you?"

"Nothing is wrong, Anto." She sighs, tired of her yelling.

"No, something got to be wrong." She says, angry. "Because we were fine a few days ago."

He scuffs. "You were fine, but we?"

"I can't, Pablo." She says, exasperated. "I want us to work, but you won't go past your old habits."

He shakes his head. "That why I'm telling you that I don't want to see you."

Antonella cursed at him. Grabbing her stuff and walking out of his room while slamming the door.

He's tired, very tired.

But he's free from that burden.

He took his free days and traveled to Sevilla to be done with whatever his relationship with Antonella was.

He feels better now that he's free to finally go look for you. He's ready to be with you, and he hopes that you understand that he was confused.

His parents sat him down and scolded him about what he did to you. He was raised in a different way.

His father had a long talk with him days after, about how it was not okay to play with the girls feelings.

< "If you ever become a dad, you would kill the guy who dared to treat your daughter they way you treaded Y/n. And that says a lot about you." >

That left Pablo with a bitter aftertaste. He never thinks about becoming a dad, but he knows that if that ever happens he would go to war for his kids.

And what can he expect? If a guy ever treats his daughter in that way, he can't even complain. He would be complaining over something he said nobody should mind about.

Mario invited him to a party, it was his annual vacation party. Gavi lost the last two because of games he had.

He showered and got dressed. His way of hiding from people outside of his circle is going with a bucket hat and some glasses.

He picked his phone from the nightstand and grabbed his keys, leaving to his friends house.

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You and your friends were pre gaming before going to Mario's party. You were so excited to finally be out and enjoying the time you lost.

But as your Abu says, even the saints cry over the lost time.

So, it's better to start to get it, then lose it by being all sad at home. And that's exactly what you friends will helped you about.

After about an hour or so, you find that it's time to go to the party. You check yourself in the mirror, detailing the things that needed it.

Your friend was the designated driver so you can drink and have fun. You are usually the designated one, but today is your day, so you don't worry about it.

When you got there, you went straight to Mario. He was an amazing friend and you love him and appreciate him with all your heart.

"I thought you weren't coming."

"When have I ever said no to a party?" You ask.

"Good point." He laughs. "Let's go take some shots." He grabs your hand and moves you with him inside the house.

You take not only one run but three. You grab a bottle of water, not wanting to get all bad before even enjoying for a little bit.

You walk over to your friend, she was talking with someone. You say hi and introduce yourself.

"This is Jaime." Your friend says. "He's my friend, and he's visiting Sevilla."

"That's amazing. Are you enjoying it?" You ask.

"Yes, don't get me wrong, I'm loving Sevilla, but Barcelona has its special thing."

"Oh, you are from Barcelona?" You ask excited. "I study college there."

You two make conversation around the fact that you two were living in Barcelona and you two go to college there.

"I'm going to go for a drink, but have so much fun and if you need anything we are going to be here." You smile at him.

You walk back into the house. You go to the bar table and grab something to drink now that your water is done.

You grab your favorite liquor and add some mixer. You turn back to the door, but you end throwing your drink all over someone.

"Joder, mi puta madre."

You lift your head, finding those puppy eyes. "Pablo," you say. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it."

He looks at you, surprised. He never thought he would find you at Mario's party. He tries to say something but his mouth is just open.

You want to laugh, he's dumb sometimes. You grab his arm, moving him to the side and take his glasses.

You don't even understand why you are acting this way. You should be hitting him with your heel or serving more into your cup and throwing it to his face.

But no.

You place the now dry glases back into his face. "Sorry, have a nice night." You say, leaving him there.

You don't care that he's there. You already made yourself to the idea that you two live in the same area, you have friends in common, you have a whole history together.

You aren't going to run. If he is uncomfortable, then there's the door. You already give enough care to him thar you ran out of it.

You go back to your friends with your almost to the half drink. You were going to have an amazing night with your friends, and that's all that matters.

After a few hours of you and your friends having all the fun. You danced with Mario, you danced with Javier and even danced with someone's dad who was at the party.

"I'll go to the bathroom." You say, smiling at your friends. "Don't move." You point at them.

You walk inside the house, find the bathroom, and go inside. You hear someone knocking on the door. You shrug, applying your lip oil and taking your time.

You open the door finding Gavi. He was waiting for you. "It's free now, calm down." You laugh.

You feel him grabbing your wrist. "Can we talk?"

You sigh, it really has to happen during a party?

You nod, pulling him to the front yard. There was almost no one there. It was barely any noise and people were minding their business.

You free yourself from his hold, looking at him and letting him talk. He's the one who wanted to talk, then he can do it.

"How are you?" He asks.

You roll your eyes. Was he even real?

"Pablo, go to the point." You say. "I'm not in for formalities, I'm good. Thank you."

"Okay, sorry." He lift his hands. "I want to tell you that I'm sorry that I didn't call after what happened at the game or before that game."

You stayed quiet and sp he did.

"Okay." You smile. "Thank you, now if this is all." You say, about to go away but he grabbed your arms.

"Y/n." He says, pouting. "I say I'm sorry."

"Okay?" You giggle. "I say thank you. Did you notice hear me?"

He was confused.

Why didn't you care?

"I want to tell you that I let others' opinions got to me, I'm really sorry that I hunted you and told you all those things. I didn't lie. I do like you."

You smile, nodding.

"And I'm sorry that I ever put you in second place. I thought that with Antonella, I was going to get something that I never got. You are the only one for me. You are the only one who make me feel this way."

"I was not the only one, Pablo." You say. "You had other options, and you chose her before me, even tho you say I'm the only one."

You feel like being quiet and letting him think that it was only the side he saw the correct one, it was wrong.

"And I don't know what you want me to tell you. If you didn't find what you wanted to find and you are not happy, I'm sorry, but you are an adult, and your actions have consequences."

He blinks a few times, he's confudes about why you are not understanding his point.

"I hope you find that one thing that you are looking for, I really do." You say.

You walk away from him, ready to move on with your life, but his grip on your wrist stops you.

"Y/n, I left Antonella."

You frown. "I'm sorry that it didn't work." You say.

"No, Y/n!" He says this time louder. "I'm telling you thar I left her. We can now be together."

You look at him, you focus on his features. The bushy eyebrow, he upper dimple, his big eyes, that green undertone.

You have to do something. You grab his cheeks, your lips finding his. His hands find your waist, he grips your skin.

You don't waste time and separate from him. Your eyes found his. You know what you have to say.

You grab his hands, moving them away from you. With this you earn a confused look, he's not understanding what is going on.

"I'm sorry, but I had to do that." You say.

"What?" He asks, confused. "Why?"

"I needed to confirm that I don't feel anything."

Pablo can't even digest your words. Why would you even do that when he just told you that he wants to be with you?

What did you even mean when you say you don't feel the same way about him? Is this a joke?

"You don't?"

You shake your head no, internally screaming from happiness l that the war is finally over.

"Pablo, you got yourself a girl whose only purpose was to be your girlfriend when I was there basically begging for you to give it to me, and now you tell me that it didn't work and let's just forget and move on?" You ask.

"I didn't want to lose you if something came out wrong." He whines.

"Gavi, we had so many misunderstandings. So many moments where you left my house mad or I left yours in a fury. Moments were we both question if what we had was worth it." You remind him. "And none of that ever made me leave. Because I was sure that I loved you, but you came here and told me that you needed someone else to be sure that you love me?" You scuff. "Pablo, that's not love."

Gavi shakes his head, he's not understanding why anything is going the way he ever imagined it. Why are you being so difficult?

"But, I explained everything to you." He says. "I told you I left whatever I had with her and that I regret ever treating you the way I did."

"Okay." You smile, shrugging.

"Y/n, que he dejado a Anto." He repeats. (I broke up with Anto)

You take a few steps closer. "Gavi," you call his attention. "Did I ask you to do that?"

That's when it hit him. You weren't going to be back with him.

You walk back into the house, ready to enjoy the rest of the night and not think about anything. You are finally free.

Your friends and you decide that you were finishing the night at home. With a bottle of some liquor and a truth or dare game.

Before leaving, you went to say goodbye to Mario. Thanking him for inviting you. You told him that you were finishing at home because it was safer.

"Oye, Y/n!" You hear someone calling you.

You turn, seeing Jaime walking over to you.

"Hola, having fun?" You ask.

"Mucha." He laughs, making you laugh with him. "Hey, want to take a shot?"

You pout. "I'm leaving, but it was really good meeting you, hope I see you around before you leave."

He nods, giving you a hug. "Can I have your Instagram?"

You nod, asking him to hand you his phone. You type your username and pass him the phone.

He checks it, saying thank you to you.

"Oh, shoot." He says. "You know the 6 from Barcelona?" He asks, impressed.

You chuckle. "Oh, Pablo?" You ask. "He's just somebody that I used to know."

"Nice." He smiles. "I followed you. I hope you follow me back so we can chat." He winks, waving at you and going back to the party.

You go to your group, helping one of your friends with her bag. You stopped at the liquor store, getting something for the night.

You all change into your pijamas and get unready, taking you makeup and jewelry off.

You do a few rounds off truth or drink, if you may say. And everybody was already a little too drunk.

"Okay, Y/n, your turn." Karla says. "Let me think."

They all think for a moment. "Oh, I know, Luisa says." Making you and everybody curious. "Do you still love Pa-?"

They all hit Luis in the arm or head. Making you laugh.

"Qué si-" You start. "Qué si me gusta Pablo?" You ask back. She nods. "Que va, ya no siento nada por él. Eso es cosa del pasado." You smile. (If I still love Pablo? No, I don't feel anything for him. That's in the past.)

🏷: @gadriezmannsgirl @messi88 @electrobutterfly @dessxoxsworld @jsprien213 @alexis1taylorr @pabl0andm3 @yaxkinnn @htpssgavi @emmdreams

[plush-hugger]

im gonna use this as a trivia (??) kind of thing and just answer all of them at once because why not

do you like resting your head in a boys lap, or on his shoulder?: SHOULDER i love hugs

Sweaters or hoodies?: arent those the same thing....

Netflix or clubbing on a Friday night?: a secret third option : going to the mall and buying each other stuff

Denim or leather jackets?: BOTH but i really like leather its prettier

What’s your favorite thing about boys?: eues.... eyes are so prety....aaaaa

How do you like your tea?: absolutely fucking DROWNED in creamer/milk and then like 10000 pounds of sugar

How do you like your coffee?: same as tea also i cannot for the life of me drink hot coffee its only acceptable if im cold otherwise its iced coffee all the time

Favorite fall color?: orange ^_^

Can you drive?: not yet

Do you have a crush?: my BOYFRIEND

What’s your favorite sport?: uhhhhh.h does eating count

Are you a pastel, neon, or neutral color mlm?: none of those i like muted colors and dark neutrals

Do you wear makeup?: sometimes? i dont know much abt makeup honestly all i do is mascara and a little bit of eyeshadow but i like it when my boyfriend does my makeup because he makes me look pretty :)

Do you like boys taller or shorter than you?: originally i preferred a guy as tall as me (im like really fucking short so i didnt really like taller people because like i dont like feeling small) but my boyfriend is like 9 inches taller than me and honestly i dont care because he doesnt make fun of me for my height ^_^

Do you prefer hand kisses, or nose kisses?: BOTH AND ALSO FOREHEAD KISSES THEURE SO FREAKING CUTE

What’s your favorite cologne smell?: idk.... that one blue fancy cologne i used to wear and my boyfriend snatched it from me and keeps the bottle so he can buy another bottle for me because he used the rest of it..... i have no idea what the name of it is but it smells really nice

Ideal date?: i could go on i dont care what it is as long as its with him but ideally we'd go hang out in the field by his apartment with some snacks and then go back home and watch movies and then make bracelets together and whatnot

What’s more romantic: cabin getaway, or tropical vacation?: uhhh no to both of those i dont like any sort of getaways i dont like unfamiliar places

What’s your favorite mlm movie?: i mean. its not a movie and its not explicitly stated that theyre gay but. nbc hannibal.......

Do you believe in love at first sight?: YES ABSOLUTELY

Have you ever been in love?: YES AND I STILL AM AND I WILL BE FOREVER

Do you like sitting in a boys lap, or do you prefer when a boy sits in yours?: neither because for one i feel like im crushing him if i sit in his lap and also at the same time im bony as hell so i dont wanna be uncomfortable if he sits in my lap so we just cuddle laying down

Metal or cloth bracelets?: uhhh..,. cloth but i make mine out of beads :3

What’s one of your favorite memories of being in love?: EVERYTHING HELLO but when we first met it was so cute :(

Do you tilt your head to the left or right when you kiss?: i dont pay attention enough to know

Would you like to take his last name when you marry?: FUCK no my last name will NOT be dawkins thats embarrassing :sob: we both mutually agreed that he'd take my last name he was like "yeah i dont blame you its ugly as hell"

Do you want kids?: cat children........and if he comes around to the idea maybe we could adopt an actual kid someday

Do you interlock fingers when you hold hands?: yes ABSOLUTELY

What’s a compliment you’d love to receive from a boy?: he always tells me random shit that absolutely kills me like he said my nose was the perfect shape one time like hello??? sir that is so random but also thank you?????? and he compliments my eyes a lot and bhsghfd.gs

What’s better, waking up to him in the morning, or falling asleep next to him at night?: falling asleep w him because i know his lazy ass will not wake up until like 1 pm if its morning

Any turn offs?: i am NOT answering that

What makes you blush?: i do not know how to answer this like. hello normal human things?

Coffee shop or dog park date?: field...

Big spoon or little spoon?: I WANNA BE BIG SPOON SO BAD BUT IM ALWAYS LITTLE SPOON BECAUSE IM SHORTER AUGH

What first catches your eye?: his eyes bbecause hes so prety

Would you enjoy it if he bought you flowers?: not a whole boquet because what the fuck would i do with that but if it was one flower id be like aw :( thank you :(:(

Do you think matching couple outfits are cute or cheesy?: honestly i fw those one time we matched pjs and it was some orange shirt and garfield pants i got him for christmas 4 him and then i wore some blue or white shirt and then blue star pants that he let me keep :3 we were matching pete the cat and garfield

Have you ever asked a boy out?: i mean technically he asked me out but i guess yeah

Which is cuter, him being confident, or shy?: CONFIDENT I LOVE WHEN HES CONFIDENT IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY TO SEE HIM COMFORTABLE

What’s one of your fave love songs?: a LOT but like out of our 50000 songs i might be a little biased but i like the one i wrote for him :3

mlm asks!

I never see these so I decided to make one lol~

Do you like resting your head in a boys lap, or on his shoulder?

Sweaters or hoodies?

Netflix or clubbing on a Friday night?

Denim or leather jackets?

What’s your favorite thing about boys?

How do you like your tea?

How do you like your coffee?

Favorite fall color?

Can you drive?

Do you have a crush?

What’s your favorite sport?

Are you a pastel, neon, or neutral color mlm?

Do you wear makeup?

Do you like boys taller or shorter than you?

Do you prefer hand kisses, or nose kisses?

What’s your favorite cologne smell?

Ideal date?

What’s more romantic: cabin getaway, or tropical vacation?

What’s your favorite mlm movie?

Do you believe in love at first sight?

Have you ever been in love?

Do you like sitting in a boys lap, or do you prefer when a boy sits in yours?

Metal or cloth bracelets?

What’s one of your favorite memories of being in love?

Do you tilt your head to the left or right when you kiss?

Would you like to take his last name when you marry?

Do you want kids?

Do you interlock fingers when you hold hands?

What’s a compliment you’d love to receive from a boy?

What’s better, waking up to him in the morning, or falling asleep next to him at night?

Any turn offs?

What makes you blush?

Coffee shop or dog park date?

Big spoon or little spoon?

What first catches your eye?

Would you enjoy it if he bought you flowers?

Do you think matching couple outfits are cute or cheesy?

Have you ever asked a boy out?

Which is cuter, him being confident, or shy?

What’s one of your fave love songs?

[swappermanent]

Reverse Inheritance

The first time Leo told me he could astral project, I didn't think much of it. My grandson had been living with me ever since his father—my son—went to prison, and though he was 20n now, he still had that same wild imagination he'd had as a kid.

Just last month, he'd been on about reincarnation, saying he remembered fragments of past lives. And before that, he was convinced our neighbor was running a smuggling ring out of his garage. Normally, I didn’t mind letting him ramble on. But lately, I was starting to get a bit tired of it.

Today, however, Leo seemed particularly insistent. “I’m serious, Grandpa. I can do it. Astral projection. It’s real.”

I scoffed. "Alright, then. Let’s do a little experiment."

"Sure, what kind of experiment?"

I reached over to a drawer and pulled out an old deck of cards, shuffling them a couple of times until I was satisfied. I fanned the cards out, then carefully picked one from the middle, holding it up so only I could see. “If you’re telling the truth, you should be able to ~float out of your body~ and go behind me to tell me what this card is,” I challenged, leaning back.

Leo took a deep breath, closing his eyes. His breathing slowed, his shoulders relaxing in a way I’d never seen before. For a second, I actually thought he might’ve fallen asleep. But then, with his eyes still closed, he whispered, “Eight of spades.”

I froze.  Placing the card face up on the table—the eight of spades.

I forced a laugh. “Lucky guess. Let’s go again.”

Leo gave a small shrug and smirked. “Alright. Let’s.”

I shuffled the deck again, this time picking a card off the top. “Alright, wise guy,” I said, trying to sound more confident than I felt. “What is it?”

He closed his eyes again, barely a few seconds this time. “Three of hearts.”

I looked down at the card, and my stomach did a small flip. “Alright,” I said, trying to mask my surprise. “That was another good guess, I’ll give you that. Let’s see if you’re really up to it.”

This time, I picked three cards at once, spreading them face down on the table. “No way you’re getting all of these right,” I muttered, almost to myself.

But a few seconds later, He rattled them off without a second thought. “Queen of diamonds, five of clubs, ace of spades.”

I looked at each card in my hand, and they were all correct. My jaw dropped, and I couldn’t hide it. “Shit… wow,” I breathed. “Alright, kid, you got me. I believe you.”

Leo’s eyes opened, and he gave me a small, satisfied smile. “You want me to teach you how?”

My heart was pounding a little faster than usual. “You think I could?” I asked, half-joking but more curious than I wanted to let on.

Leo leaned forward, his face serious. “Yeah. But you have to really want to do it. Like, let go of everything. All those thoughts that keep you grounded here.”

"Let go of everything…" I repeated.

---

Over the next few weeks, Leo patiently taught me to master astral projection. At first, it felt like some sort of strange meditation. But gradually, I learned how to slip out of my physical body, just as Leo did, until I could stand beside myself, looking down at the slouched figure.

Each session, Leo and I would push the boundaries a little more. We couldn’t go too far since our astral projections only seemed to last about four hours at a time, and even then, we couldn’t travel much faster than a brisk jog. But I was fine with that; I wasn’t interested in dashing across the city, only in seeing how far I could push this strange new freedom.

When we’d reach the end of our limit and weren’t back in our bodies yet, something bizarre would happen. Our astral selves would start to get get pulled back, as if our bodies had a magnetic force calling us home. Those first few times, it was disorienting, hurtling back through space until I snapped back into my skin, breathless, my heart pounding. Leo explained that it was the body’s way of keeping us tethered, that if we stayed out too long, our astral forms would dissipate like smoke, and we’d cease to exist.

“Cease to exist?” I asked him one night, feeling the weight of that warning.

Leo nodded, his face solemn. “I haven’t pushed it that far, Grandpa. And I don’t think we should. The pull back gets stronger the closer we get to that limit. But if we ignore it…” He shrugged, letting the words hang in the air, dark and final.

Still, despite the risk, I found myself craving these nightly adventures. For the first time in years, I felt alive, truly alive. As someone who’d all but resigned myself to the slow, tired rhythms of old age, it was thrilling. But as our nights stretched on, I started to wonder about Leo’s fascination with this skill. He was young; he didn’t have a curfew, he didn’t have an old, weary body holding him back. He could be out living his life instead of hovering in ghostly form around the house or strolling through empty streets with his old grandpa. What was he getting out of this?

One night, as we settled into our chairs to begin our ritual, I glanced over at Leo’s body. He’d gotten comfortable, his head tilted back, his breathing already slowing, his eyelids fluttering shut. It struck me how young and full of life he looked, even when he was so still. I felt an odd pang of longing, a desire that surprised me in its intensity.

When had I last felt young? Truly young, without the weight of decades pressing down on my shoulders? What would it be like to feel like that one more time, to feel that boundless energy I saw in Leo.

As Leo’s breathing grew steady, his astral self drifting beside me, I looked back at his empty body, sitting there, vulnerable and untouched. The thought tugged at me, and for a moment, I felt an almost irresistible urge to reach out, take his body for myself just for one fleeting moment

---

The idea had been lingering in the back of my mind for weeks now. Every time I saw Leo drifting out of his body, the temptation grew a little stronger.

He was shy about his body, sure, and I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that felt like a betrayal somehow, slipping into him without asking. But there’s no way he’d ever say yes. Besides, I would be in and out before he’d ever know, right?

Finally, I gathered the courage. One evening, Leo announced he was heading out and asked me to join. “I’ll be back in a couple hours, wanna come with,” he said with a grin as he leaned back, his breathing slowing as he began the process.

I shook my head no, feigning sleepiness. “I’ll stay in tonight,” I replied. “I could use the rest.”

As his body drifted to sleep, I waited, counting each minute until I was sure his astral form was far enough away. Then, with my heart racing, I initiated my own astral walk and hovered towards his body .

A deep anticipation rushed over me as I prepared to enter. “Just a half hour, tops” I told myself.

Taking a deep breath, I tried to slip in as gently as possible. But something was wrong. As soon as I began, it felt as if I were pushing against a wall. I couldn’t just slide in like I usually did with my own body. I adjusted my position, aligning myself more carefully with his form, and tried again. This time, I felt a bit of give, and gradually, I was able to push through, inch by inch.

First my legs merged with his, then my torso. I felt the strength in his muscles as I took on his form. I kept pushing, my hands now matching his, aligning, filling out his arms, until finally, my head was nearly there, just hovering over his own.

But then, out of nowhere, I saw Leo’s astral form float towards me from across the room, his face a mixture of shock and fear. Me entering his body must’ve attracted his astral form back as a defense mechansim. Panic flared within me. If he re-entered his body while I was halfway in… I didn’t even know what would happen, but I didn’t want to find out. Before he could reach me, I shoved my head down, slipping fully inside.

---

I blinked, and when I opened my eyes again, I realized I was fully conscious—inside Leo’s body. My vision felt sharper, my muscles responsive, and as I looked down, I took in his smooth, toned arms, the strength and youth radiating through every limb. It was exhilarating.

I hopped up, feeling the lightness in my step that I hadn’t felt in years. Each movement was effortless, as if my body itself had forgotten what it meant to be heavy. I walked around the room, flexing his hands, rolling his shoulders, feeling every inch of youth as it coursed through me.

But then I felt something odd—a light tapping on my stomach, almost like a faint punch or a persistent nudge. Instinctively, I flexed Leo’s abs, the sensation dulling a bit, and that’s when it hit me. That tapping—that was Leo, trying to get his body back.

“Leo…” I whispered, feeling a pang of guilt. “I’m sorry, kid. I’ll be out soon, I promise.”

I let myself enjoy the feeling of his body, each sensation crisp and vivid. As I explored myself, I felt a familiar tension grow in my pants, one that I hadn’t felt in years. Instinctively, I reached down to my waistband and grabbed down to tug at my new, surprisingly hairy ball sack. That was enough to get my cock to throb.

I began stroking my new, uncut cock while feeling up my smooth torso with my other hand. As I did, my mind wandered to all the hot guys I could pull in this body if Leo ever let me borrow it again. Concentrating on that thought was all it took to send me over the edge. Slowly and sensually tugging at my shaft, I spurted all over my chest, completely draining mysefl.

Finally, as I lay back into the bed, a wave of satisfaction washed over me, leaving me feeling both exhilarated and calm. The room was warm and quiet, and with the last bit of energy fading from me, I felt a sudden drowsiness settle in. I lay down, and before I could convince myself to leave, I drifted into sleep, enveloped in the softness of youth and the quiet of Leo’s room.

--

I jolted awake, my heart racing as I felt hands gripping my shoulders, shaking me roughly. Blinking in confusion, I looked up—and there was my old, familiar face, creased with panic and rage, staring down at me.

“What the hell did you do?” he demanded, his voice hoarse and furious.

It took me a second to process, my mind still foggy from sleep. I tried to sit up, disoriented, and felt the youthful energy of Leo’s body springing into action, as if the night hadn’t worn it down in the slightest.

“What…” I managed, words failing me. But he kept going, too upset to wait for me to catch up.

“I had no choice but to take your body,” he said, his voice laced with frustration. “Otherwise, I’d have just… disappeared. Astral projection doesn’t work for body swapping. That’s not how it’s supposed to go. I never told you that because I didn’t think you’d ever try something like this.”

The full weight of his words settled over me, each one hitting like a cold punch. “So… we can’t just switch back?”

He shook his—my—head, a bitter smile flashing across his face. “No. There's a refractory period before we can attempt any switch again. It’s designed to prevent exactly what you just did. We’d have to wait ten years before we could even try to go back.”

“Ten years…” I repeated, the words sinking in like stones in my stomach. My old body—now his—was 90. I knew my own heart, knew how every joint ached, knew how every year was harder than the last. The odds of it lasting another decade were slim to none.

The guilt knotted in my chest, sharp and sour. I opened my mouth to apologize, to try to explain, but the words caught in my throat. What could I even say?

But then, unbidden, a different thought crept in. In ten years, this body would be 30. That meant I had Leo’s—my entire 20s to live again, the years I’d once cherished and missed deeply. I looked down at my youthful hands, the strength and vitality I could feel coursing through every inch of Leo’s body, and felt a strange, conflicted thrill rise within me.

He must’ve noticed the shift in my expression, because his face—my old, familiar face—darkened. “Are you… are you happy about this?” he whispered, incredulous.

I shook my head, trying to fight the feelings rising up within me, but they were relentless. The shame of it burned hot, yet I couldn’t deny the excitement simmering just beneath.

I swallowed hard, trying to keep my expression steady. “Leo,” I said softly, but I didn’t know how to finish.

He watched me, a flash of betrayal in his eyes as he seemed to understand, even without me saying it. And then, with a bitter laugh, he turned away.

I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror across the room. Fuck, this’ll be fun.

[creamflix]

❤︎ — choso kamo likes it in purple !

content warnings: established relationship. soft!dom reader, very submissive bottom choso. use of "squirting" strap-on, reader "cums" inside choso. slight corruption kink? he believes he's been bred. heavy feminization (choso is referred to as "girl," and having a "pussy.") breeding kink (?). prostate stimulation. lots of praising. begging, desperation. dirty talk. reader is implied to be wearing a strap-on but can be read as having a d1ck.

event masterlist ❤︎ general masterlist

as the words leave choso’s lips — so pure and hopeful you can’t even believe he’s serious — you freeze for a moment, unsure if he’s joking or genuinely believes this. there’s a sparkle of sincerity in his eyes, the faintest blush coloring his cheeks as he waits, breath held in anticipation.

“you know… men can’t actually… get bred, right?” you try, keeping your tone soft, not wanting to break his heart if this is news to him.

his brows knit together in confusion, eyes darting to yours. “they… they can’t?” the innocence in his voice nearly undoes you, the hopeful naivete in his words so raw, so sweet. “but… i thought… you could… you know, fill me up like that.”

you bite back a smile, his innocence wrapping around you like a soft blanket, tugging at your protective side. “welll, there’s another way to do something close to that,” you say, gently trailing your fingers down his arm. “it’s… different, but it can still feel just as good.”

he tilts his head, intrigued but still a little lost. “different? what do you mean?”

you take a small breath, careful not to sound too eager, knowing how fragile this moment is for him. “it’s something called pegging, and it’s… well, i’d be the one… filling you up,” you explain, your voice dropping to a gentle, almost coaxing tone. “i’d take care of you, make sure it feels good. all you have to do is trust me.”

choso’s eyes widen a bit, the blush spreading to the tips of his ears. there’s a glint of hesitation, but it quickly melts into something else — a spark of curiosity and excitement that he can’t hide.

“so… i just have to relax, and you’ll do everything?” his voice is quiet, laced with uncertainty, yet there’s something undeniably eager beneath it, a soft flicker of desire mingling with his innocence.

“that’s right,” you assure him, brushing a thumb over his knuckles in reassurance. “just let go, and i’ll take care of everything. i promise.”

the weight of your words sinks in, his gaze searching yours with wide, trusting eyes. he’s so vulnerable, so open, like a blank canvas ready for you to leave your mark. it stirs something deep within you, a protective desire mixed with a thrill, knowing you’re about to guide him through something so intimate, so new.

“okay,” he whispers, voice barely audible, his cheeks a warm, rosy hue. “i trust you.”

you smile, a gentle yet possessive warmth blooming in your chest. “good. we’ll go slow, make sure you’re comfortable every step of the way. just focus on how it feels, yeah?”

his nod is small, but the way his eyes darken slightly, that glimmer of curiosity overtaking any lingering nervousness, tells you all you need to know. he’s yours to guide, to corrupt just a little, and he’s eager to let you.

“you’re gonna do amazing, choso,” you murmur softly, pressing a reassuring kiss to his cheek, savoring the way he melts under your touch, the way his breath hitches with excitement and anticipation.

. . . .

watching him so eagerly scrub himself is honestly one of the sweetest things you’ve ever seen.

he’s already flushed from the warm water and his own effort, his hair clinging damply to his face as he carefully makes sure everything’s as perfect as possible. the way he keeps glancing back at you, eyes wide and seeking approval, sends a warmth through you that’s hard to put into words.

when he’s finally finished, he straightens up, a soft blush painted over his cheeks as he nervously meets your gaze. “is… is this okay?” he asks, voice barely above a whisper, but there’s a tinge of eagerness hidden beneath his shy tone.

you can’t help but smile, reaching out to gently brush a stray strand of hair from his face. “you’re perfect, cho,” you murmur, watching the way his eyes light up at the praise. “you did such a good job.”

he visibly relaxes at your words, his lips curling into a small, hopeful smile. “really? i just… wanted to make sure everything’s right for you.”

“it’s more than right,” you assure him, leaning in to press a soft kiss to his temple, feeling his breath hitch at the closeness. “now, just lie back and relax for me, okay? i’ll take care of everything from here.”

he swallows hard, nodding as he settles onto his back, his body tense but willing. as you position yourself, letting your breath ghost over his flushed, sensitive hole, you can feel his whole body tense, his fingers digging lightly into the sheets. he’s already trembling slightly, his eyes half-lidded, looking at you with such trust, such anticipation.

“you look so pretty like this, y'know that?” you murmur, trailing a finger along his thigh, enjoying the way he shivers under your touch. “all flushed and waiting so patiently.”

he bites his lip, his cheeks darkening even further. “i just…wanna be good for you.”

the softness in his voice tugs at your heart, and you can’t help but cup his face, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips. “you’re already so good, cho. just relax for me, okay? i promise i’ll make it feel good.”

his nod is small, but he lets out a shaky breath, his muscles loosening slightly as he settles deeper into the bed. as you trail your hand down, letting your fingers brush over his entrance, you can feel him tense up again, his eyes fluttering closed as he braces himself.

“just breathe f'me, cho,” you whisper, pressing a reassuring hand to his thigh. “one finger first, niiicce and slow.”

he nods, exhaling as you press in gently, watching as his expression shifts from nervousness to something softer, a quiet pleasure that builds as he adjusts. “mmph… it feels… different,” he murmurs, voice breathy as he blinks up at you, his eyes dazed but full of wonder.

“good different or bad different?” you ask, your tone playful as you press a little deeper, watching the way his body responds.

“good,” he whispers, his lips parting slightly as his hips shift, instinctively pressing closer to you. “reaally… good.”

the softness in his voice sends a thrill through you, and you lean in, pressing gentle kisses along his inner thigh as you move your finger slowly, carefully, giving him time to adjust. “you’re doing so well, cho,” you murmur, feeling his breath quicken at the praise. “'m gonna add another, okay?”

his nod is almost frantic, his body arching slightly as you slide another finger in, and a soft gasp escapes him. “it’s… it’s intense,” he breathes, his voice quivering as he shifts, adjusting to the feeling.

“just relax, sweetheart,” you coo, your free hand rubbing slow, soothing circles on his hip. “let me take care of you. just focus on how it feels.”

he lets out a shaky breath, his body melting under your touch, and you watch the way his eyes flutter closed, his face flushed and soft as he surrenders completely to you. it’s a sight that fills you with an almost possessive warmth, knowing he’s given himself over to you so completely, so trustingly.

“you’re so good for me, cho,” you whisper, leaning down to press a kiss just above his navel, savoring the way he shivers beneath you. “such a good boy, letting me do this.”

his eyes flutter open at your words, and he looks at you with a mixture of adoration and desire, his voice barely above a whisper as he replies, “i… i just wanna be yours. all yours.”

but the minute the first drop of warm spit lands inside choso, his reaction is immediate — his body jolts, a soft, desperate sound escaping him as he clings to the sheets beneath him. “nnngh — ahh,” he breathes, his voice breaking slightly as your fingers continue their rhythmic, careful motion, scissoring him open with a gentle, deliberate pressure that sends shivers down his spine. his hips twitch forward, fighting the urge to bear down on your hand, every sensation building into a burning ache he’s never felt before.

“s-sensitive,” he manages, his voice soft and breathy, cheeks flushed as he fights to keep his eyes open, wanting to watch the way you handle him. but every time you move, every time your fingers press just right, his lids flutter shut as he lets out another needy, mewling sound.

“just relax, cho,” you murmur, a hint of playfulness in your tone as you lean closer, watching his expression shift with every move. “the more you relax, the better it’ll feel. promise.”

“mmph… i-it already feels… too good,” he whispers, his voice catching in his throat, a fresh bead of precum sliding down his dick and pooling on his abdomen, mixing with the rest that’s already spilled there from his endless, leaking arousal. his breathing’s heavy, labored, each inhale catching as your fingers curl inside him, stretching him open.

“that’s a good thing,” you reply, leaning in to let your breath ghost over his flushed, sensitive skin as another glob of spit lands right in his hole. it’s messy, warm, and he lets out a choked whimper, his thighs trembling as you slide your fingers deeper, twisting just enough to draw another gasp from his lips.

“a-ah… can’t… can’t believe it feels… like this,” he murmurs, his voice barely a whisper, his head tilting back as he looks up at you with a dazed, half-lidded gaze. “it’s… so much.”

“it’s gonna be even better when i fill you up properly,” you tease, nodding to the pretty, purple toy sitting beside you, glistening and ready. “think you can handle it?”

he shudders, his face going a deeper shade of red as he looks at it, his breath coming in quick, shaky pants. “i… i don’t know,” he admits, though his voice is lined with excitement, his body pressing instinctively against your hand. “but i… i wanna try.”

“that’s my good boy,” you coo, watching his chest rise and fall with every breath, his skin damp with a fine sheen of sweat. “let’s get you all ready, then. gotta make sure you can take it, right?”

“y-yeah,” he breathes, his lips parting as he lets out a soft, needy moan when you spread him a little more, pressing down on the spot that makes his whole body tense up. “oohh — nngh… right there, please… please don’t stop,” he babbles, his voice pitching higher, sounding utterly wrecked.

“don’t worry, i got you,” you whisper, savoring every little sound he makes, every shiver that wracks his body as he squirms beneath you. “gonna make you feel so good, cho. you just keep being a good boy for me, m'kay?”

his answer is a soft whimper, and when you finally pull your fingers free, he lets out a needy, desperate sound, his hole clenching around nothing, aching for more. you give him a reassuring smile, reaching for the toy, letting him watch as you slick it up, his wide, dazed eyes following every movement.

“ready?” you ask softly, positioning it just at his entrance, waiting for his signal.

he nods, his lips trembling as he bites back a whimper, his legs falling open just a little more. “please… please, i want it,” he whispers, his voice full of trust, of need.

you press forward slowly, watching his face as he gasps, his eyes squeezing shut as he takes the stretch, his breath stuttering with each inch. “oh — oh my god,” he moans, his voice breathy, broken, his whole body trembling. “s-so… so full…”

“you’re takin' it so well,” you murmur, guiding his hips gently as you sink in deeper, letting him feel every inch, watching as he bites his lip, struggling to keep his composure.

“ahh… can’t… can’t believe… feels so… so big,” he gasps, his hands fisting the sheets as he tries to keep himself together, his mind spinning with pleasure. “oh, god… i don’t… don’t know how long i can…”

“just breathe f'me, cho,” you whisper, your voice soothing as you run a hand over his trembling thigh. “you’re doing amazing. just let it happen.”

you start slow with choso, letting him settle into the feeling, easing him into this vulnerable position you know he’s never experienced before. he’s flushed from head to toe, his breath coming in soft, shaky pants as you fill him up inch by inch, your hands firm on his thighs to keep him grounded.

“you’re doing so well, cho,” you murmur, your voice warm as you lean in, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “look how pretty you are, takin' it all like this.”

his cheeks flush a deeper shade of pink at your words, but even as he squirms under you, you can feel his hands grasping at the sheets, fingers curling tight as his hips instinctively shift, pressing down on you as you’re easing inside him.

“more,” he breathes, his voice shaky, threaded with need. “please… i can… i can take it. want all of it…”

you chuckle softly, watching him struggle for composure, his soft, pleading tone making it harder and harder to hold yourself back. “you’re so greedy, aren’t cha?” you tease, leaning down to brush a hand over his cheek, feeling the heat radiating off his skin. “isn’t this your first time, sweetheart? thought we’d take it slow.”

he lets out a frustrated whimper, his hips bucking up as his fingers twist in the sheets, desperation clear in every line of his body. “i know, but… it feels so good,” he gasps, his eyes fluttering closed as he tries to rock against you. “need it harder, please… don’t be gentle with me. i can take it, i swear…”

“oh, i know you can,” you reply, voice low and teasing as you push in deeper, watching his body arch under the pressure. “you’re takin' it so well already, aren’t ya, baby? so eager, like you were made for this.” you give his thigh a squeeze, letting him feel the weight of your hands holding him down. “succhh a good lil' thing, lying here alll spread out and begging to be filled.”

he moans, his whole body shuddering as he tightens around the strap, his face twisted with a delicious mixture of pleasure and frustration. “yes… yes, just like that,” he whines, his voice trembling as his hands scramble against the sheets, trying to get a hold of something, anything, to ground himself. “please… want all of you. i’ll be good, i promise…”

“yeah? wanna be good f'me?” you murmur, pressing down harder, drawing another sweet, desperate sound from his lips as he writhes beneath you. “if you’re really good, i might just give you what you want, might just fill you up till you can’t think straight. that what you want, hm?”

he nods frantically, his eyes wild as he looks up at you, his cheeks flushed, a few strands of hair clinging to his forehead. “yes, please, please,” he babbles, his voice pitching higher as he arches his back, pressing himself against you. “wanna be filled up so bad… wanna be yours. wanna feel it all the way inside —”

“you’re already mine,” you tell him, sliding a hand down to grip his hips as you pull him closer, the friction sending a delicious jolt through both of you. “my pretty lil' thing, begging to be bred like this. look at you, so desperate, so needy for it.”

he whimpers, his eyes glazing over, his lips parting as you pick up the pace, thrusting harder, each push drawing another broken moan from his throat. “oh — oh god,” he gasps, his voice catching as his hands fist tighter in the sheets. “pleaassee… please don’t stop, i need it, need you…”

“such a greedy little thing, wanting more already?” you tease, leaning in so your breath ghosts over his flushed skin. “you love being filled up, don’t you? love it so much you’re begging for more before i’m even halfway done with you.” you punctuate your words with a firm thrust, watching as his eyes roll back, his lips trembling as he tries to stifle another needy whimper.

“y-yes… love it… love being yours,” he breathes, his voice breaking as he rocks his hips to meet your thrusts, his entire body trembling as he surrenders completely to you. “please… please don’t stop, i’ll be good, i swear… want it all. wanna be filled, bred, everything—”

“that’s my good boy,” you murmur, your voice soft and possessive as you press him down, feeling his body shiver beneath you. “gonna give you exactly what you want, gonna fill you up till you’re leaking, till you’re a mess, all mine.” your hand slides down, pressing just above his navel as you thrust, watching as he keens under the pressure, his body arching desperately.

“oh — oh god, yes,” he moans, his voice breathy and broken as he melts into your touch, his thighs trembling as he surrenders completely. “please… please don’t stop…”

the words send a thrill down your spine, and you lean in, pressing a soft, possessive kiss to his parted lips. you murmur against his mouth, your voice a low promise. “’m not stopping till you’re completely filled, dripping, and every inch of you is mine.”

the sounds spilling from choso’s lips are nothing short of desperate, his voice cracking as he whines and sobs beneath you, his hands grasping at the sheets like they’re his last anchor.

“please — please, i need it, need you inside me,” he wails, his breath coming in hitched, broken gasps as his hips try to meet your every thrust. “’m yours, just — just fill me up, please, i can’t — i can’t stand it anymore!”

your chuckle is low and dark, a rumble that only serves to make him even more frenzied. “oh, you want me that badly, huh? look at you, all spread out, begging to be filled up. such a pretty thing, a needy little mess, all for me.” you lean in, your voice a mocking purr as you bring one hand up to grip his hip, steadying him as he bucks helplessly beneath you.

“yes! yes, just like that,” he sobs, his body shaking as you drive into him, unrelenting, each thrust deep and purposeful. his own dick twitches, leaking over his abdomen, completely untouched, yet throbbing from the sheer stimulation.

“oh god, please,” he breathes, his voice climbing higher, his cheeks wet with tears as he writhes, completely overwhelmed. “please, i need it so bad, please breed me, fill me, i’ll be good, i’ll take it all—"

“you think you deserve it, baby?” you murmur, watching his reaction as you lean down, letting your breath skim over his ear, savoring the way his body arches, every nerve alight. “you really think you deserve to be bred like this? to be filled up until you’re leaking and ruined?”

he whimpers, nodding frantically as he looks up at you, his eyes glazed and unfocused, cheeks flushed as he struggles to form coherent words. “yes, yes, please, i need it,” he begs, his voice a broken whisper. “i’ll take it all, i’ll be good, i’ll be so good f'you. please, i can’t — i can’t take it anymore… need to feel you inside, need it so much…”

your fingers itch, hovering over the pump, the mechanism that’ll fill him just like he wants, but you hold off, savoring the sight of him completely undone, the way he thrashes, how utterly vulnerable and needy he’s become under you.

“then you’re gonna have to beg a little more for it, baby,” you coo, a sadistic grin on your face as you thrust into him harder, drawing another sob from his lips.

“if you want me to fill you up like that, you better tell me exactly how much you need it. every. plap filthy. plap little. plap detail.”

he chokes on a whimper, his hands scrambling to grip anything as he gasps, shuddering from head to toe. “i — i need it so bad,” he sobs, his voice trembling as his body writhes beneath you. “need to feel it, deep inside, want it so badly it hurts… please, please, i’m begging you. i’ll be your good girl, i’ll take it all, just — just give it t'me, fill me up like you promised.”

the sound of that, the desperate, feminine way he’s reduced to pleading, breaks something in you, and your fingers move to the pump, hovering as you look down at him, savoring his flushed, tear-streaked face.

“you’ll take it all, won’t you?” you murmur, pressing a kiss to his damp temple as you finally press the pump, a rush of warmth spilling into him, filling him up just as he’s been begging for. his breath catches, his whole body tensing as he feels it, his eyes rolling back as he lets out a strangled, blissed-out cry, his own length twitching uncontrollably, spilling over himself in sheer ecstasy.

“there you go,” you whisper, your voice laced with pride as you watch him fall apart completely beneath you, his body shaking, his breath coming in desperate gasps as he lies there, utterly spent and full, just like he wanted. “such a good girl, taking it all like that. you look so pretty, all filled up and ruined for me.”

he nods, a dazed, satisfied smile tugging at his lips as he reaches for you, his fingers trembling as he clings to you, his breath softening as he nuzzles into your touch. “thank you,” he whispers, his voice barely audible, exhausted and content. “thank you so much…”

you can’t help but laugh softly as you press a tender kiss to the tip of his flushed, sensitive cockhead, feeling him shudder and whimper as his hips twitch up, already overstimulated from everything you’ve put him through. he looks utterly adorable, his cheeks still pink, hair messy and sticking to his forehead. you brush a few stray strands back, catching the dopey, lovestruck grin spreading across his face as he meets your gaze.

“thank you,” he mumbles, his voice soft and full of reverence, his fingers trailing over your shoulder, warm and affectionate. “that was… that was amazing.” he hesitates for a second, biting his lip before looking at you with those wide, hopeful eyes.

“so… do you think… maybe we’ll have kids soon?” his cheeks flush deeper as he says it, glancing shyly away, clearly brimming with excitement. “i mean… i can already feel it working,” he adds, a little whisper that makes you stifle a laugh.

you smile, squeezing his hand as you help him clean up, listening to him ramble with that innocent optimism that’s so genuinely choso. “oh, yeah?” you tease, hiding a smirk as you hand him a warm towel. “think i did a good enough job breeding you, huh?”

he nods enthusiastically, his eyes lighting up, his smile wide and absolutely precious. “definitely,” he says, a look of complete certainty on his face. “i mean, with how full i feel… it’s gotta work. we’re practically guaranteed a family.” he trails off with a dreamy sigh, looking up at you with such genuine adoration that it almost makes you feel bad for not explaining the biology to him sooner.

but right now, seeing him so happy, so content, you decide to let him have this moment. “well, you certainly did a good job taking it all,” you say with a soft smile, ruffling his hair as he leans into your touch, beaming.

“i’ll be the best dad,” he murmurs, eyes sparkling as he starts rambling, envisioning the family life he’s already got mapped out in his head. “we could go to the zoo, and i’ll teach them all about the animals… oh! and we’ll have matching sweaters! i mean, maybe… maybe just for the holidays.”

“and we’ll do all of that,” you say, grinning as you pull him into a warm hug, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. “but maybe we’ll have a little biology lesson first, hm? just so we’re both, uh… prepared.”

“biology lesson?” he asks, tilting his head, curious but entirely unbothered. “doesn’t that mean more practice?”

you laugh, patting his back. “maybe it does.”

❤︎ taglist: @ghost-buddies @no-irefusetotellumyname @byerno6 @anime-s1ut @stinkarinka @aldebrana @toessssw @mima0127 @ilovyoo m sorry this one took a bit longer, hope you like it <3

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[shadowsviper]

Hello! Here to say hi! Your post appeared on my scroll and I noticed you have just one, so I figured you might be new around here! Welcome to Tumblr! I hope you find your crowd soon enough! 💖

In the meantime, do you mind telling me something about Jason Todd? I've never been too deep into DC, but I recognize his name. I'd love to hear your headcannons/thoughts about him! 💖

Hi! Thanks for welcoming me :) I've actually been lurking on tumblr for a while before I finally got the confidence to start writing.

Here's a short basic rundown of Jason: Jason Todd is the second person to take the mantle of Robin after Dick Grayson. Batman caught him stealing the wheels off the Batmobile in a dark alleyway one night and took him in. He was more rebellious and he didn't like Batman's moral code. Fans actually voted to kill him off in the series. Jason would be beaten by the Joker with a crowbar and left to die with his mother inside a warehouse with a time bomb. He would later be resurrected by Talia Al Ghul in the Lazarus Pit and took the mantle of Red Hood. He would use guns and violence when it came to crime fighting. When he found out that Batman didn't avenge him in any way, he felt betrayed and let his anger out on Gotham's criminals. He believed that they deserved a worse punishment.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Jason Todd Headcannons

He loves to bake, especially cookies. He'll bake other pastries every now and then, but his go to is cookies. It's something he'll never admit to his family, other than Alfred. He'll drop off some to his brothers sometimes with an insulting note; he would say they're poisoned just to mess with Tim

Whenever he has free time, he's in the library. Sometimes he'll be at the public library if he doesn't want to see his family. Other times he'll be in the Manor looking at whatever new books Alfred and Damian bought

It's actually canon that Jason likes to read books like Pride and Prejudice, and The Art of War, among many others

He loves to bother his brothers whenever he can

He loves to swing by GCPD when Dick is working just to mess with him. He might even go as far as faking an emergency just for the emergency to be him wanting to say a quick fuck you

Dick has banned him from coming within a 20-foot radius of GCPD. He also threatened to arrest him if he got close

It doesn't stop Jason. He has yet to be arrested because they technically can't arrest a dead man

He'll mess with Tim at any time. His things will slowly go missing; his mugs, coffee, important papers, you name it.

One time when Tim left his place unattended, Jason moved everything an inch to the left. It drove Tim crazy. More crazy than he already was considering he hadn't slept for the past two days. He'll get Jason back one day

What he does with Damian is a 50/50. Sometimes he'll spar with him for fun. Just a quick training exercise or he's actually trying to kill the demon spawn, who knows. Other times they're both reading silently in the corner of the library.

They won't talk about it after

Definitely broke into Wayne Enterprises way too many times

He had no reason to go in. He just wanted to bother Bruce or Tim. Or both

Definitely both

Has been escorted out multiple times with Bruce watching with his head in his hands

That man is stressed lmao

Definitely picks up Damian from school with white girl music blasting at full volume. The bass is cranked up to the point where you can feel it inside the school

Damian hates it so much because his classmates find Jason pretty cool and they keep trying to talk to him about Jason

Later banned from picking Damian up from school

[kadetheradio]

What is your nickname? Twist or Kade.

When is your birthday? April 23rd

What was your longest relationship? My currant one:)

What is your favorite book? The Outsiders

What is something you're insecure about? My smile

5 Male celebrity crushes none

5 Female celebrity crushes none

What is your dream job? Freelance Author

What do you consider your biggest accomplishment? Publicly coming out as AroAce is something I'm proud of.

What is a fact about you that nobody would believe? Despite everything, I am the most fem fucker in my family.

What were your highs and lows for this last month? Skip.

Where is somewhere you'd like to visit? I've always wanted to see Hawaii

How do you de-stress? Read, eating, and napping.

What are your favorite apps besides Tumblr? Ao3, Bluesky, and Youtube.

Describe yourself in one sentence. A very funny friend, but still a great listener.

What do you think makes you attractive? My eyes and my sense of humor

What is something you're really good at? Drawing

What is something you're really bad at? Baking

A time that you told a lie. Too tired to think on it.

What's a totally random and useless fact that you know? Mars' larger moon is gonna crash into it.

Who knows you the best? My Bestie. I've told him things not even my bf knows.

What is your most prized possession? I own a pretty piece of obsidian

What is your longest friendship? I don't keep track

When did you first feel like an adult? Dunno, tired

Do you/ Have you played any sports? No, but I used to watch basket ball and Soccer

How are you feeling right now? Tired

Are you an early bird or a night owl? Night Owl

Do you believe in love at first sight? Not really?

Favorite song lyrics right now? "Days seem sometimes as if they'll never end. Sun digs it's heels to taunt you. But after sunlit days, one thing stays the same, rises the moon."

What does self care look like for you? Taking a shower

Describe yourself with 3 singers. Nah

What makes you nervous? The feeling of being watched

What’s a pet peeve you have? My sisters fighting

What will always make you cry? Animal deaths

What kind of first impression do you think you make on people I normally let them tell me.

Question Game

Are we tired of these yet?

What is your nickname?

When is your birthday?

What was your longest relationship?

What is your favorite book?

What is something you're insecure about?

5 Male celebrity crushes

5 Female celebrity crushes

What is your dream job?

What do you consider your biggest accomplishment?

What is a fact about you that nobody would believe?

What were your highs and lows for this last month?

Where is somewhere you'd like to visit?

How do you de-stress?

What are your favorite apps besides tumblr?

Describe yourself in one sentence.

What do you think makes you attractive?

What is something you're really good at?

What is something you're really bad at?

A time that you told a lie.

What's a totally random and useless fact that you know?

Who knows you the best?

What is your most prized possession?

What is your longest friendship?

When did you first feel like an adult?

Do you/ Have you played any sports?

How are you feeling right now?

Are you an early bird or a night owl?

Do you believe in love at first sight?

Favorite song lyrics right now?

What does self care look like for you?

Describe yourself with 3 singers.

What makes you nervous?

What’s a pet peeve you have?

What will always make you cry?

What kind of first impression do you think you make on people?

Free Pass! (Ask any question you want that's not on the list)

[enhas-pov]

enemies by blood pt.2

summary: after sunghoon failed to kill reader, you’d think they both left it behind them, but no. they both seem to force themselves to do what their dads ordered, but why do they keep on holding back? they’re enemies after all.. right?

warnings: guns, yelling, cursing, near death experience, kissing, smut, fingering, pussy eating, unprotected sex, r4pe(not sure?) reader is against it at first but enjoys it later on.. backshots, creampie, pet names

word count: 7.7k

pt.1

════════════════════════

i was sat up with my back against the wall, still in pain after my "fight to the death" with sunghoon. yes, im still alive, surprisingly. it surely wasnt supposed to end like this, especially not with the both of us still alive breathing. one of us were supposed to go down, and he had the chance to end it all for me, but he chose not to, and i have no idea why.

"kiss me goodbye?" i said, almost sounding like a whisper. he froze like he couldnt believe what had just come out of my mouth. his grip on the gun loosened, just for a second as if he was questioning whether to kill me or not. he stared at me with his eyebrows furrowing in disbelief, unsure if i was joking or not. with the way i was looking into his eyes he could tell i was being serious when a tear rolled down my cheek. i leaned forward, my bloodied lips parting before they touched his. the kiss was soft as our lips moved together. i felt him deepening the kiss, parting his mouth as well. and with his lips still on mine, he pulled the trigger.

the gun fired, but not through my head. he fired the gun into the wall right beside us instead of at me. confused, i pulled away from the kiss to look at him, but he only lowered his head and buried his face in the crook of my neck. i let out an unexpected sob, reality hitting me that i was afraid of losing my life. "sunghoon..?" i whispered. he didnt answer me, only i could feel his heavy breath against my neck. the two of us—laying on the floor in complete silence with our bodies pressed together, a weird feeling of comfort filling the air.

“i was supposed to kill you.” sunghoon said, looking down at my weak body still sat up against the wall. he kept on walking back in forth due to how stressed he was, meanwhile i couldn’t be bothered to stress about this. “you’re supposed to be dead!” he shouted at me before he pointed the gun at me once again. “then shoot me” i simply said. his eyebrows furrowed, gripping the gun in his hand—knuckles white from the pressure. the gun trembled lightly as he clenched his jaw, he couldn’t do it. “fuck this..” he mumbled before he started walking towards me. he threw the gun on the ground, gripping both of my arms as he forced me to stand up. his touch was rough, but the look in his eyes were the complete opposite.

“can’t do it?” i asked him. he didn’t answer right away, he just looked me dead in the eye like he could see right through me. for a moment, i thought maybe he’d kill me right here with his bare hands.. but to my surprise he didn’t. “you’re not worth it” he spat, shaking his head. “i don’t give a damn anymore” he said. i swallowed hard, trying to keep myself cool and not show my weak side, “then go. leave me here”. his grip on my arms only tightened, but then just as quickly, he let go. he turned his back on me and ran his hand through his hair, exhaling sharply. his fists clenched as if he was fighting back, “get out of here” he said, his voice low. i looked at him confused, “what?”. his head suddenly snapped back around, eyes darker than they were before. “get out of here.” he repeated.

“i don’t want to see you again, understand? just fucking go” he lifted his hand up, using his index finger to point to the exit. “but-“, “go!” he yelled at me. it was like he was trying to make me believe he actually didn’t care about saving my life, or maybe he was trying to convince himself he didn’t care. i hesitated for a second, not knowing if i should listen to him or not. if i didn’t listen to him there’s a chance i could end up dead, so i had no choice but to do what he told me to do. i turned towards the exit, slowly walking away before i heard his voice again, “don’t make me regret this” he mumbled. “don’t come back, you hear me?” i froze, and i couldn’t help but to smile a little at him. “you know i will. only one of us is supposed to make it out alive after all” i said before simply turning away and walking out, leaving him all alone with the decision he made—to keep me alive.

i felt a stinging pain when the hot water came in contact with my wounds. i closed my eyes and let the water run down my face, and down to my body. sunghoon. park sunghoon. he was all i could think about. why didn’t he kill me? it was stuck on my mind.. i mean, he hated me didn’t he? is hate even the right word? that man despises me. if the roles were switched and i had the gun in my hands, i’d kill him in a heartbeat since my dad told me to do so. im not weak—i can actually do what im told unlike someone.. right? i mean, his blood on my hands? that wouldn’t bother me.. shit, i can’t keep lying to myself. i let out a big sigh, turning the water off before i wrapped the towel around my body.

i looked at myself in the mirror after my shower. you couldn’t see my wounds, thank god, they were covered by my pajamas. i couldn’t have my dad asking any questions- i quickly turned my head around at the sound of a door creaking, it was the front door. my dad wasn’t supposed to be home yet, so who was in my house? i slowly made my way out of the bathroom before walking down the stairs—keeping an eye out on anything that might seem off. “___” the sound of my name made me jump. i turned around just to see my dad stood behind me. “dad? you’re home early..” i let out a sigh of relief. “yes i am, and do you know why?” he raised his eyebrows at me and crossed his arms. was i supposed to guess why?, “no..” i mumbled.

“i stopped by the den. figured i’d help train my daughter, and you know what i see?” shit. “my men. dead. care to explain?” my dad wasn’t completely shocked, he’s had a lot of his men die before so that’s why he’s not bawling his eyes out like a baby. “i left early.. are they all dead?” i tried to lie my way out of this, i couldn’t bring myself to tell him the truth about sunghoon. “all of them” he said. sunghoon must’ve gotten rid of his own men’s bodies before my dad arrived, or else this would’ve been a whole different conversation. “i really don’t know what happened” i lied with a straight look on my face. he nodded slightly, “i’m gonna guess it was park. probably sending us a warning..” he muttered. i only nodded in agreement, not sure of what to say.

“as my daughter, i expect him to be dead by the end of this week.” he said in a serious voice. “by the end of this week?” i almost stuttered, caught off guard by how little time i had left. “yes. will that be a problem?” he questioned me. “no dad” i said, straightening my back to prove my worth. he nodded, “i trust you won’t disappoint me. you’re my only daughter after all, it would be a shame if you did” he smiled, placing his hand on my shoulder before he walked away. jesus christ dad.. always putting so much weight on my shoulders. i’m not sure how i was gonna be able to kill sunghoon by the end of this week, but i was going to get it done. i can’t disappoint my own dad, im his only daughter after all.

i was parked on the side of the road in the city of seoul, waiting impatiently for sunghoon. my dad got one of his men, jiho to find out exactly where sunghoon would be so i could be there to kill him. it kinda sucked that he happened to be in the city since there are people everywhere, so i would have to somehow get him to a non-crowded place. chewing my gum, i blew a bubble before catching a sight of sunghoon *pop* "got you.." i reached into the glove box, taking out my glock and hiding it inside the waistband of my jeans. i got out of the car and shut the door behind me before i slowly started walking towards him.

i stopped right next to him where he was buying food on the side of the street, and he didnt notice me until i spoke up. "beautiful day, no?" i said, my eyes scanning around for something delicious to get for myself. "uh, yeah-" he turned to me and froze, the small smile on his lips fading quicker than ever. "shit.." he cursed under his breath. "look- this isnt a good time for you to be here." his voice was serious and direct. i hummed in response--not taking him serious at all, "well.. its a good time for you to come with me" i said, keeping my gaze fixed on the food instead of him. he let out an exaggerated sigh, "i cant-"

"sunghoon. i will blow your brains out right here--right now, ill get out of here way before the cops-"

"sunghoon!!" a sweet and excited voice cut me off.

sunghoon and i both turned around at the same time, revealing a happy and young girl stood behind us. "who is she?" she asked him, the happy look on her face turning into confusion. i turned to sunghoon just to see that he himself had no idea what to say. "im a friend of his" i lied, answering the question he couldnt. the girl still looked confused, squinting her eyes as she looked in between the two of us. "ohhh, i get it! shes that kind of friend" the girl smiled, covering her mouth with her hands. sunghoon and i both furrowed our eyebrows in confusion, having no idea to what she was talking about. "youre dating!" she exclaimed all of a sudden.

"no-" sunghoon and i jinxed. "shes really pretty tho" she nudged sunghoon, trying to keep her voice down when saying so, but i heard it clearer than ever. she turned to me with a smile, "im yeji! sunghoons younger sister" she said. i let out a nervous chuckle, "im ___-" sunghoon suddenly grabbed me by my arm, "dont you have somewhere to be? babe.." he glared at me, the pet name making him physically cringe. i looked at his sister and then back at him, putting on a fake smile before i brought my hand to his bicep. i stood on my tiptoes, leaning in closer to sunghoon and placing a kiss on his cheek. sunghoon was taken aback, meanwhile his sister let out a giggle. "ill see you later hoon!" i waved goodbye to his sister before i walked away.

i brought my phone out and dialed jihos number, putting the phone up to my ear after. "hello?" i heard his voice from the other line say. "move it." i ordered him as i walked back to my car. "yes maam, when would you like me to move it to?" he asked me. "tomorrow" i said as i walked back to my car, "im gonna kill him tomorrow" i hung up the phone and opened the door to my car before getting in. i couldnt kill sunghoon in front of his own sister. i might not have any siblings of my own, but i couldnt imagine having someone that i love watch me die right in front of their eyes, im not that evil after all.

i walked into the entrance of a tall building along with 5 men of my dads. "here you go" jiho said, handing me a heavy sniper that i would be using on sunghoon. "youll be going to the rooftop while were on ground. give us the signal if something goes wrong, and we`ll help you right away" i nodded at him, watching as the 5 men walked out into the dark late at night. i made my way up the stairs of the building while i carried my sniper, a million thoughts filling my mind. what i was thinking about the most was his little sister, i could imagine having one and her finding out i was shot and killed. im not completely heartless? of course im gonna feel some sort of guilt.

i made my way to the top of the stairs before reaching for the heavy door and opening it. a loud thud of the door shutting behind me when i walked out on the rooftop. it was a bit difficult to see, but my sniper had a night vision mode. i leaned over the edge of the roof, watching the view of the whole city. it was pretty, but parts of it would be covered in blood pretty soon. i placed my sniper in a comfortable position before leaning in, watching the dark turn into a green-tinted glowing hue. "i dont see him.." i spoke into my earpiece with a low voice, my fingers slightly adjusting the sniper as i looked around for him. "hes supposed to be leaving his dads office in a few minutes. theres no sign of a car to pick him up, so he`ll be standing outside long enough for you to get your shot"

i hummed, catching a sight of mr. parks office. i waited for what felt like forever until jiho spoke, "he should be leaving about... now". i watched the big doors to mr. parks office open, and there was sunghoon. he was wearing a black suit with his hair slick-back, he looked good not gonna lie. he was all alone, stood outside with his hands in his pockets. "whenever youre ready" jiho said. i aimed for his chest, not feeling evil enough to ruin his pretty face. i took a deep breath, my finger hovering just above the trigger. suddenly, my hand froze with the sniper still in my grip. *ring ring* the silence broke when my phone started ringing, "what the fuck.." i mumbled, taking my eyes off sunghoon and the sniper. "is everything okay?" jiho asked me, his voice filled with concern. "everything is fine. its probably dad" i reached into my pocket just to see "uknown caller" on my screen.

my eyebrows furrowed. confused and annoyed, i placed my phone back in my pocket and turned back to the sniper. i leaned in, ready to take out sunghoon for real this time, but that was until he was no longer there. my eyes widened, "where is he?!" i shouted in irritation as i looked around for him in panic. "shit.. we lost him" jiho cursed to himself before i heard him telling everyone to spread out and look for him. i rolled my eyes and leaned away from the sniper, "where the fuck did he go.." i mumbled to myself, but then i froze. my heart pounding in my chest when i felt a cold, hard metal press against the back of my head. fucking hell sunghoon..

"tell them you found me" sunghoon whispered, his voice so quiet that jiho and the others couldnt hear. i let out a shaky breath, "i found him" i said while i looked straight ahead. "we havent been able to locate him. where is he at?" jihos voice said from the other line as i fought every bone in my body not to tell him that sunghoon was stood right behind me. "call it off. tell them you want to do it on your own" he said, his voice sharp and cold as his hands gripped the gun pointed at my head even tighter. i let out a chuckle and shook my head, no way i was going to listen to him. sunghoon wasnt having it tho. he tightly wrapped his other hand around my waist and yanked me backwards against his chest, his fingers digging into my skin with a painful force.

he moved the gun towards my temple and pressed it into my skin, threatening to blow my brains out. i took a deep breath, "call it off" i said, only receiving confused voices from the other end of the ear piece. "maam, this would be the second time youre calling it off. your dad wouldnt be happy about this" jiho said, sunghoon listening in. "and?" sunghoon whispered. "i want to do it on my own.. for dad.." my voice came out barely above a whisper, "louder." sunghoon ordered. i let out a sigh before speaking up again, "i want to do it on my own. for dad". jiho understood and agreed, him and the others packing up and getting ready to leave.

sunghoon roughly ripped my ear piece out, throwing it on the ground before he stepped on it. he suddenly pushed me away from his grip, causing me to stumble forwards. i turned around annoyed, watching him adjust his tie. i was desperate to know how sunghoon knew i was on the rooftop, and how he planned all of this? "how did you..?" i asked in disbelief, not being able to finish my question before he cut me off. "doesnt matter." he said sharply, his voice tense and direct. "dont you owe me one?" i asked him, his eyebrows raising in question. "for not blowing your brains out in front of your little sister" i said, trying to sound casual as if the situation i was in wasnt as tense as it was. "ill admit it was generous of you. but unfortunately, i dont owe you anything--though i cant say i havent thought about it" he smirked at his own last words, gross.

i watched him intensely as i waited for him to make a move, he didnt even have the gun pointed at me anymore so i was really confused. without saying a word, he started walking towards me which only caused me to back away until i felt my body come in touch with the edge of the rooftop. sunghoon only got closer, placing each one of his hands on either side of me, trapping me against the edge. he leaned in with his face close against mine, "how many times do you think we`ll find ourselves like this, hm? because ill have to admit, im really starting to enjoy this" he mumbled, tilting his head at me slightly. "cut the crap, sunghoon. what are you planning on doing this time? since.. you couldnt kill me last time" i grabbed a hold of his tie, pulling him even closer to me.

he let out a chuckle before he grabbed my hand that was playing with his tie, "maybe ill just have to get creative this time." a cocky smile curling at the corner of his lips before he looked to the side, where my sniper still was stood. i followed his eyes and let out a chuckle when i noticed what he was looking at, "you call shooting me with a sniper creative?-" he brought his hand out, shoving the sniper off the edge of the rooftop, and for a brief moment, there was only silence. a sudden woosh of air, followed by a sharp crack as the sniper collided with the ground, sunghoon turning to me with the same cocky smile that was just on his lips.

i froze for a split second, my eyes flickering from the edge of the rooftop and back to him. inside i was trembling, terrified for heights but i wasnt going to let him notice my slight fear. "is that supposed to scare me?" i said, my tone sounding a little too forced as i tried to keep it cool.. which i hope he didnt notice. "no. but i can tell it did" his hand brushed against my arm, causing me to shiver just a bit. i shook my head as i avoided eye contact, looking around for a way to get out of the current situation im in. sunghoon could push me right now and id fall off the rooftop just like that, i needed a distraction or something.. "distracted?" sunghoon asked me as if he could read my thoughts.

i looked back at him, a sudden thought coming to my mind right away. he was a man after all, distracting him would be the easiest thing to do. i looked up at him with pleading eyes, "are you gonna kiss me goodbye again?" i asked, tilting my head at him slightly. he bit down on his lower lip, "i might.." he said. "but youre not gonna like how it ends this time" his voice low and threatening as he leaned away slightly, but i only pulled him back by his tie before crashing my lips onto his--giving him no time to process it. i brought my hands up to the back of his head and tugged at his hair to which he put his hands on my waist and pulled me in closer. i opened my mouth slightly, allowing him to slip his tongue past my lips and deepening the kiss even more. while he was earning himself a boner, i was ready to end it for him once and for all.

my hand slid up his chest, and in a swift and effortless motion, i took control. i used all my strength and flipped us both around. before sunghoon could react, i shoved him--his body falling over the edge. i let out a shaky breath and turned around, not feeling like watching him fall all the way down and have his body smashed against the concrete, gross.. that was it, easier than i thought.. i just killed him, sunghoon is dead and my dad is gonna be so proud of me. my chest was rising and falling slowly as the wind was the only thing to be heard. on the outside, i looked calm and fine, but on the inside my mind was racing. i held it all in, clenching my fists before turning around to walk away.

"you bitch.." i heard a mumble. no fucking way.. i turned back around, my eyes widening when i watched sunghoon swing his leg up, pulling himself back up before his feet came in touch with the rooftop floor again. i looked at him in horror. meanwhile, sunghoon adjusted his tie calmly and clenched his jaw. "youre insane.." i gasped, slowly backing up as i knew what was coming for me. "says the girl who just pushed me off the roof." his voice was unsettling and cold, sending shivers down my spine. "dont act like you werent about to do the same" i barked back at him. and with no warning, he launched himself at me. he aimed a kick in my stomach that caught me off guard, causing me to stumble backwards.

"what the fuck?!-" he charged at me again--a swift punch aimed at my jaw. i stumbled back once again, struggling to keep my balance as i swear my vision was about to go black. he suddenly grabbed my arm and yanked me closer to him, twisting my wrist in doing so. "a-ah!" i yelped, pain taking over my whole body. i twisted myself out of his grip, turning on my heel to deliver a swift kick to the side of his knee. he groaned as he fell to one knee, slowly turning up to look at me with a glare. "is that all you got baby?" he taunted before getting back up on his feet. and with no warning once again his fist landed on my cheek, sending me almost flying backwards as my body hit the ground.

i started backing up when sunghoon was walking towards me, and i didnt notice how i was getting closer and closer to the edge of the roof. he got on top of me and threw another punch across my face, my eyes shutting close when my head threw back. my head pounding and every bone in my body hurting, i desperately tried grabbing onto something to stabilize myself--only to realize there was nothing to grab onto. i opened my eyes, my vision blurry but still able to see sunghoon hovering over me. he let out a chuckle, and as confused as i was i looked to the side--my eyes widening when i found myself hanging off the side of the roof, half of my body dangling over literally just air.

sunghoon leaned over me, a sick and twisted expression on his face. "this is it princess, already got your goodbye kiss." he growled, his breath hot against my face. he could see the panic in my eyes, it made him smirk while i was terrified for my life. without thinking, i drew back my arm and swung it with all my strength, my fist connecting with his stomach. the unexpected force of my punch took him by surpise, and he lost his grip--stumbling backwards as his back crashed hard onto the rooftop, the wind knocking the air out of him. i quickly lifted myself up and got back on solid ground. i glanced at the edge where the terrifying drop had been moments ago, returning back to reality right away.

i got up on my feet, my legs shaking with fear while my heart pounded faster than usual. my eyes caught onto the rooftop door, and with one last look at sunghoons body laying on the ground in pain--i made a quick run for it. running towards the door, i could hear sunghoon slowly getting back up on his feet which only made me panic even more. i barged right through the door and slammed it shut behind me, trying to lock it when i suddenly realized it didnt have a lock. "fuck- no.." i cursed to myself. i turned around and started running down the stairs, and i had no idea where i was going because the second i get out of the building i would be running straight into the dark.

my body suddenly froze, flinching at the sound of the door being slammed open. i watched sunghoon walk through the door, his tall and dark figure looking down at me right away. "im not done with you yet.." he said, his voice low and chilling--sending a chill down my spine. "fuck you sunghoon!" i yelled at him, furrowing my eyebrows in anger right before i started running down the stairs again, sunghoon following from behind me. i quickly glanced behind me--eyes widening with fear when i saw him close behind, closer than i thought he would be. my heart only raced faster, and without thinking i stopped by a random door near the end of the stairs and flung it open. it was an office. there was a couch, a small table, a desk with a chair, and the only light coming from a desk lamp.

i also happened to notice a drawer right next to the door, perfect. after locking the door i got behind the drawer, using all of my strength to push the heavy drawer across the floor. my hands trembled as i struggled to shove it in front of the door. it scraped against the hard wooden floor with a loud and unsettling sound, and right as i managed to push it in front of the door--the door handle started rattling. i let out a sigh of relief as i watched sunghoon struggling to open the door, meanwhile i started looking around for a way out. i walked over to the window and looked down, it wasnt any different from when i was hanging off the roof just a second ago. "come on baby.. open the door!" i heard sunghoon shout from the other side of the door, while still trying to break through.

"fuck off park!" i snapped at him, sick off all the disgusting pet names he keeps on calling me. i ran my hand through my hair, letting out a frustrated sigh as i tried to figure out how i could possibly get out of the current situation im in. i started pacing back and forth, not realizing that the sound of sunghoon trying to break through the door had stopped. i paused and turned to look at the door, did he give up? i slowly started making my way towards the door, leaning over the drawer to place my ear against the hard wood. i cant hear anything- "a-agh! f-fuck..!" i let out possibly the loudest scream ever when a sharp metal object slammed into the door with a loud *crack*, punching a hole straight through the door and right into my ear.

"youre the one to blame for that." sunghoon growled at me, his voice thick with rage. i could hear him throw away the object he basically just stabbed me with, right before his fist started punching holes right through the door like it was nothing. meanwhile i was dealing with unbearable pain. the pain had hit me instantly, like a sharp pain bursting right through my skull. it blurred everything around me for just a second as i struggled to keep my balance. "a-ah.." i whimpered in pain as blood started running down my ear. i glanced at the door, panic not being able to take over me when i saw sunghoon glaring at me through the big hole he punched in the door. i watched both of his hands fit through the door, finding the edge of the drawer before he shoved it to the side with a forceful push.

i started looking around for something to defend myself with, sunghoons fingers brushing against the door knob from the inside before twisting it with a *click* sound. i was stood frozen in the middle of the office with my heart pounding painfully in my chest, trying to steady myself but every inch of me felt too weak. the door creaks open slowly--seconds before sungoons tall figure stepped into the office. "you look.." he stepped closer to me, a smirk forming on his lips, "like you`ve given up." he said. his gaze ran over me slowly like he was savoring every second of my weakness. i shook my head and kept my chin lifted, acting like i wasnt literally about to fall to my knees and actually give up.. but i could feel the tension creeping up my neck.

with his hands in his pockets, he started walking towards me slowly. backing away would only make me look scared, and even tho i was i wasnt going to give him the satisfaction. i straightened my shoulders when he approached me, his dark eyes looking down at me while mine looked up at his.

"i can tell when youre pretending.." he said.

"what-"

"a-ah!" i let out a scream when sunghoon suddenly slammed his foot into the side of my knee, the force twisting my leg in a way its not meant to go.. i immediately fell to both my knees right in front of him, the sharp pain pulsing through it as i struggled to catch my breath. sunghoon didnt leave me be for a second before he grabbed a fistful of my hair and yanked my head backwards. i let out another painful scream, tears forming in my eyes when he kept on tightening his grip by each second that passed. "s-stop..!" i yelped, looking up at him with my teary eyes--only to see that he was smiling down at me. hes a sick fuck for enjoying this.. "wont stop until youre dead.." he mumbled, his eyes locked on me intensely.

i couldnt even process his words before my head was slammed into the wall with a sickening loud thud. the impact rattled through my skull, sharp and dizzying. before i could try and somehow defend myself, he slammed my head into the wall once again.. and again, and again. my vision went completely blurry, my head pounding in the worst way possible and i was suddenly aware of nothing.. i felt numb. before my body could crash onto the floor, sunghoon let go of my hair and caught my almost-lifeless body. i was awake, but i wasnt really there. the room felt like it was tilting--my vision coming and going and i was painfully aware of every moment. with my limp body in his arms, he threw me onto the couch with a quick and careless motion.

my body flopped awkwardly when i landed on my stomach. my face was pressed into the cushions, and i could feel sunghoons eyes looking down at me from above. i opened my mouth slighlty, trying to beg for my life.. but i couldnt say much. "hoon.." i mumbled quietly, but he still managed to hear me. he didnt answer, only i felt his hands caressing my hips. i knew what was coming.. he was probably gonna stab me in the back or something (literally). i let out a shaky breath, preparing myself for the pain of death, but to my surpise i felt him grip my hips before lifting me up. i was extremely confused to why the fuck he positioned my ass in the air, "ill make sure your last moments are filled with pleasure.. not pain." he uttered coldy, leaning down with his front against my back. "its the least i can do for you angel.." he taunted into my ear before he let out a dark chuckle.

"w-what..?" i murmured under my breath, trying to turn my head to get a glimpse of what he was doing--but he only buried my face deep into the cushions causing me to let out a whimper. "shh.." he cooed me, stroking my hair before i felt his hands tugging down my black shorts. no fucking way. my eyes widened when i realized what this horny, disgusting, sick fuck was about to do to me. i started wiggling my hips around to get away from his grip, but he held me still with one hand while the other successfully pulled my shorts down, and i let out a gasp when he did. "p-please stop.." i sobbed, trying to lift myself up--but my body gave in and i plopped back onto the couch. sunghoon let out a laugh at my struggle before he brought his hand to my ass cheek, stroking it lightly before leaving a harsh slap on my skin.

i let out a yelp when my body jolted. i thought the stinging pain would go away by itself, but it didnt when sunghoon kept on leaving harsh and painful slaps on my ass cheek, my skin turning redder and redder each time he did. "shit- sorry princess. i was supposed to give you pleasure right? not more pain.. my poor baby." he spoke gently. his hand caressed my red ass cheek--nothing but a whimper coming out of my mouth due to the fact that it was still stinging. "s-sunghoon.." i hiccuped, "you dont- you dont have to do t-this.." i begged him to let me go, or at least just kill me right away. i didnt want to die like this. he hummed, "now, why would i do that? hm?" he brought his fingers to my panty-covered clit before he began moving his fingers in a circular motion. i let out an unexpected moan, not on purpose..

"see. you like it dont you? fucking slut.. acting as if you werent the one making out with me on the rooftop." he growled at me. i felt his fingers leave my clit, and i was relieved for a second--until he tried moving my panties to the side. i hurriedly closed my legs, stopping him from going any further, but that was the wrong move of me to make. he gripped both of my thighs, forcefully spreading them apart, "keep these open" he tapped my thigh, "wouldnt want to hurt you even more." he said as if he cared if i got hurt or not. "just kill me.." i finally said, which felt ironic because i never imagined id say those words. especially to sunghoon himself.. "just kill you?" he repeated while teasing my entrance with his finger. i let out a mumble, "i dont wanna.." i shook my head.

he hummed as if he was actually considering my words, and then i felt him insert a finger deep into my tight hole. i let out a loud moan, not being able to control my reaction to the pleasure i was feeling. even tho i couldnt see sunghoons face, i just knew he had that evil smirk on his lips.. i bit down on my lip when he started finger-fucking me. he curled his fingers inside my walls, and i couldnt help but to lean into his touch. "knew it.. you fucking whore." he spat (literally). he leaned down with his face dangerously close to my pussy, right before spitting directly at my clit. my whole body jolted when he attatched his mouth to my clit and sucked on it aggressively, "m-mmh! n-not there..!" i yelped as i squirmed around uncomfortably. he ignored my words as he continued sucking on my clit and finger-fucking me at the same time.

when the tip of his long and thick finger pushed against my sweet spot, i let out a loud cry at the overstimulation. a silent scream left my throat, "i-its too much!!" i squeaked. sunghoon pulled his mouth off my clit, placing a small kiss on it before he leaned back. "so pretty.." he mumbled. "makes me want to keep you alive just so i can use your pretty little pussy whenever i want to." i cringed at his words. i then felt him pull out his finger and a sigh left my lips at the loss of it. my eyes darted around the room before taking a deep breath--a breath that got caught in my throat when i heard the sound of sunghoon unbuckling his belt. "g-go jerk off or something..!" i yelled at him, but my words were quickly muffled when he shoved my face into the cushions.

"mmm!" i tried to scream, "i will. just inside you.." sunghoon pulled down his pants along with his boxers, his cock jumping out with pre-cum leaking from his tip. he wrapped his hand around his length and started jerking himself off, groaning at the pleasure he was feeling. i suddenly let out a soft moan when he ran his tip through my slit, hating the fact that he was actually making me feel good. he lined up with my entrance--both my fists clenching as i was pressed hard into the cushions, my palms sweaty and shaking slightly. i let out a gasp when he pushed himself into my entrance, the burning sensation making me eyes water. "so fucking tight.." sunghoon groaned, forcing his cock deeper into my walls. "i-it hurts!!" i yelped but sunghoon didnt seem to care when he continued pushing in deeper.

"it`ll feel better soon. i promise baby" he mumbled, his hand moving to the side of my face before he stroked my cheek. i let out a whimper when his tip suddenly touched my cervix, his full length inside of me--pressed so tightly that i could feel every inch of him, as if i were about to burst free from the pressure. "sunghoon- y-youre too big.." i moaned, all though it wasnt supposed to come out as one.. "ill make it work- fuck.. just relax for me." his hands sneaked their way to my hips where he gripped tightly at my skin, preparing himself to start pounding into me. i let out a whine when he slowly pulled out of me until his tip was the only thing inside, and with one very harsh thrust.. he slammed his way all the way back in.

"a-ah!" i let out a silent scream when his tip came in touch with my cervix again, but this time it felt like a stab. sunghoon bit down on his lip, throwing his head back in pleasure when he started pounding into me from the back at a slow pace. maybe he really was trying to pleasure me..? "mmh.." i moaned, craving more but at the same time i hated it. it made me feel disgusted by myself, torn between what my body was reacting to and what my mind was screaming. i couldnt let him know that despite everything, a part of me was actually enjoying this. i tried to push myself backwards on his dick unnoticed, but oh did he notice.. "look at you wanting more.." he laughed at me, "you want more baby?" he tilted his head to the side. i shook my head, telling him no but him and i both knew that was a lie.

"no? alright-" he stopped his movements, ready to pull out of me before i stopped him. "no!- wait.." i blurted out, lifting my head up and slightly turning to the side to look at him. "hm?" he hummed, "tell me what you want." he demanded, his hands caressing my hips while he waited. "m-more.." i mumbled, my voice barely above a whisper. "cant hear you" he taunted me. bitch.. "i-i want more" i repeated myself, making it clear to him that i did want more and i hated myself for it. "fucking whore" he degraded me which only made me clench around his dick, "you like that?" he let out a dark chuckle before he started pounding into me again, this time faster and exactly how my body was craving it. "mhm..!" i moaned, my mouth falling open slightly while my eyebrows furrowed.

"shit-" sunghoon groaned, the sound of skin slapping filling the room every time his hips came in touch with my bare ass. he slipped one of his hands down to my lower stomach, pressing down against his bulge that was very much visible through my skin. "feel how big i am for you?" his other hand squeezed my hip as he started pounding into me even faster. i let out a cry at the feeling of it while already being a whimpering and moaning mess for his dick. when i felt myself getting closer to my high, i opened my mouth slightly, "hoon-" i tried to speak, but i only ended up choking on an unexpected moan. "youre close- i know, fuck. can feel it with how youre clenching around my dick like crazy.." his hand that was pressing onto his own bulge on my lower stomach travelled its way down to my clit, his fingers starting to move in a circular motion.

i yelped when my whole body jolted, feeling myself about to burst at any moment. "me too baby. go on, milk my cock.." he said, his dark voice making it clear that hes not asking me to--but telling. a loud and pornographic moan escaped my lips when i felt the wave of pleasure crashing over me, my back arching and my toes curling when i came all over his cock. "f-fuck..!" i yelped, my legs starting to shake at the feeling of sunghoon still pounding into me. sunghoon moved his hands to my ass cheeks, squeezing and slapping them afterwards when he got closer to his high. "shit shit shit..!" he groaned, throwing his head back in pleasure when his thick cum spurted deep inside of me. i whimpered when i felt him painting my walls white, a mix of his cum and mine leaking out of my tight hole.

sunghoons thrusts slowed down as he came down from his high, the both of us panting and trying to catch our breaths. sunghoon pulled out of me slowly, looking down at my cum-leaking hole clenching around nothing. i let out a sigh at the loss of him, burying my face into the cushions with a soft moan. sunghoons hands reached for my body, his hands gripping at my waist before gently flipping me over. he guided me onto my back, my hair falling over my face when i rolled onto my back. i looked at sunghoon sat on his knees in front of me, his eyes looking down at my body resting on the couch with my legs slightly spread open for him. he leaned down against me until his chest was pressed against mine, his hands placed on each side of my head as his eyes looked into mine.

he brought one of his hands to my face, moving away the hair that was in the way. "how are you gonna do it?" i asked him, my voice coming out as a soft whisper. he looked at me for a second, and without saying a word he buried his face in the crook of my neck, and it only reminded me of last time he failed to kill me. i felt him leave a trail of small and soft kisses down my neck before he looked back up at me again, "my dad will have to kill you himself." he mumbled, leaning in and brushing his lips against mine. "i wont let him get near you.." i froze for just a second, caught off guard by his words. my eyes blinked up at him, my hand moving up to his face before i cupped his cheek. "if my dad comes after you.." i whispered, "ill kill him myself" i said, sunghoon raising his eyebrows at my sudden words, a smile tugging on his lips.

"i know you will" he said before he pressed his lips against mine.

[jaybirdluvr73]

You're my Best Friend (nanami kento x reader)

A longer fic version of this

Best friends to lovers with Nanami Kento. Fluff, a little tiny bit of angst but a Happy ending. Mild spoilers. Set in the early 2000s. I was thinking about what to call this and became inspired by the song "You are in love" by Taylor Swift

a/n: this is my first fic like this, i hope you guys like it. Feedback is super appreciated <3

"You're a…what?", you say in disbelief, trying to figure out if your normally level headed best friend has officially gone insane.

"A sorcerer", Kento says slowly, as if he hasn't fully accepted it either. "In the world, there's cursed energy and some people, sorcerers, are capable of using it. Usually to fight curses." 

Your mouth hangs agape as you wonder if this is some prank he's playing on you. But Kento has never lied to you before. (although he's never claimed monsters and sorcerers were real either.)

"I believe you", you say finally, to Kento's relief, "I mean this sounds completely insane but I trust you."

He finally cracks a small smile before frowning as he remembers something. "That's not all"

"What? Don't tell me aliens are real too"

"They want me to go to a school that trains sorcerers" he swallows before continuing, "in Tokyo"

You feel your heart stop as you realise that means you'll hardly see him anymore. Ever since preschool, the one constant in your life has been Nanami Kento. Sitting in class, eating lunch, walking home, no matter what you did or where you were, he was always by your side. 

You can't pinpoint the exact moment you fell in love with him, you just remember waking up one day and knowing. Maybe it was when he would ask the teachers questions for you in preschool, or in elementary school when he tried to bake you a cake by himself for your birthday. It might have been when he started reading all your favourite books so he could talk about them with you or when he spent half an hour trying to win you a teddy bear at an arcade. You may not know when you fell in love with him but you do know that loving Nanami Kento came as naturally as breathing.

"Promise you'll come back to visit", you say, trying to offer a smile. He nods, swearing that he'll never break a promise to you.

Nanami Kento remembers the exact moment he fell in love with you. It was fourth grade and your tenth birthday was coming up. He spent days looking up recipes and baking tutorials so that he could bake you the perfect cake. He spent hours on it. By the time he finished, his mom joked that there was more flour on him than in the cake but it was worth it to see the look on your face when he sowed it to you. The cake didn’t turn out great, the layers were uneven, the frosting was grainy and the entire thing was lopsided. When you saw it, you immediately started tearing up. At first he started apologising because he thought it was so bad that it made you cry. But then you threw your arms around his shoulders smiling widely and told him that nobody had ever done something so nice for you before. From that moment he knew that he wanted to spend the rest of his life making you smile like that. 

“- and  I put some of the new Fall Out Boy songs on the playlist too. The new album isn’t their best but”, you stop as you see a strange look on his face. “What’s wrong Ken?” 

“Nothing’s wrong it’s just,” he pauses then says, “You’re my best friend”

“The cheesecake was good but I think next time I want to try the brownie”, you say, shivering as you step outside the new bakery Kento brought you to. “I told you to bring a jacket, " he says, frowning while he takes off his sweater to give you. 

“I didn’t think it would be this cold!” you say trying to defend yourself as you tell him to keep his sweater on so he doesn’t freeze. “I’m not feeling that cold anyway”, he says as he forces the soft material into your hands. 

You put it on, closing your eyes as you feel the warm embrace of the fabric. “It smells like you”, you say before clarifying, “in a good way, I mean.” He just laughs and shakes his head before walking you back home. 

He laughs the same way years later, when you reveal that you slept in the sweater for a week, only stopping once it didn’t smell like him anymore. 

“Kento I know you’re in there!”, you shout, knocking on his bedroom door. “Your mom told me you were home.” He opens the door with a sigh before looking down at you and asking what you were doing here. As he gazes at you, you notice the deep eyebags that weren't there before, and a hardness in his eyes that you’ve never seen before. 

“I’m here because my best friend disappeared! Because you haven’t responded to my texts, or IMs or emails for weeks and I needed to know that you were okay”

“Well you can see that I’m fine. Thank you for checking on me, but you can go now.”

“Fine? Really” , you scoff, pushing your way into the dark room. “You won’t talk to me, your parents told me that you barely say a word to them and you clearly haven’t been sleeping! I want to help you Ken. I want to be there for you but you keep pushing me away.” Your voice softens before you continue, “I know you and Haibara were really close. I can’t imagine how you must be feeling right now”

“Exactly, you don’t know how I’m feeling right now and I hope that you never do”, he yells , “I’ve seen what this life can do to people, I’ve seen the toll it takes on the people left behind. I could die at any moment while on a mission, and I don’t want you to have to feel that kind of loss! I love you too much to put you through that! It’s better this way.” 

“Better for who Kento? Because I’m already miserable without you and you don’t seem to be doing much better! I know that being a sorcerer is dangerous and that something could happen to you. But isn’t it better to have loved and lost than to live life alone, because you’re worried about what might happen?”, you feel tears welling in your eyes before you continue, “I’m in love with you Kento and I don’t care how risky your life is. I’m willing to face any amount of pain if it means keeping you in my life. I would rather have you, and risk losing you, than not have you and lose you anyway.”

Kento feels his world stop spinning as soon as the words ‘I’m in love with you’ spill out of your lips. His mouth hangs open as he tries to figure out what to say. The only words that he manages to get out are, “Can I kiss you” as he leans closer. You nod slowly as you move towards him. 

You can feel his breath tickle your face before his lips finally descend to capture yours. Something warm grows in his chest, like the first flowers of spring blooming after a long winter. The entire world around him disappears as he feels your soft lips dancing against his own. His hands move gently to cup your face as he deepens the kiss. You snake your arms around his waist, feeling the soft caress of his hands on your cheeks. Feelings left unsaid for years come bubbling up and overflows.

When you two finally break apart to breathe, you notice a familiar look in his eyes. And this time, you knew what it was. 

He is in love

a/n: I'm not a huge fan of the title banner i made but lmk what you guys think.

tag list: @jasminelee324

[ijwtbap]

ㅤㅤ★ㅤA promise — Bakugō

— Bakugō x GN! reader.

You like Katsuki, he likes you — is a fact not a maybe. He doesn't seem to believe it thought.

a/n. I had to keep my promise ig. Is VERY short so im sorry, also Im bad at english and is my first one shot so have some mercy plz.

You were going insane. Just a little bit. Well, actually, you were ready to rip out your hair and scream into the void, standing naked as flames consumed you. That's kind of insane.

Every time Bakugō referred to you as his friend—even if he only said you weren’t that annoying and didn’t mind having you around (which was close enough)—you wanted to disappear.

You had done everything but treat him platonically. Sure, you could see how holding hands, cuddling, or crying together might seem platonic. But kissing in bed and saying “I love you” in a completely serious way?

You were completely lost.

At first, you thought it was a joke, then maybe just a game to him.

But now? Now you’re convinced he’s just... dense.

You could tell Bakugō you love him dead serious while looking him dead in the eyes, on your knees and with a big sign that said 'plz marry me,' and he would still think you're joking.

And it was killing you.

"Are you going to study or what?"

You were in his bedroom, "studying." Yeah, right—studying. You just wanted to be there with him. You’d barged in without warning, and yet, he hadn’t even questioned your presence.

"No."

You knew he liked you back. There was no way he didn't, but fuck, he refused to acknowledge it.

"I like you."

His eyes widen for a second before he looks back at his notes.

"Shut up."

"I really do, tho."

"Yeah, whatever."

"I love you."

"If you don't stop, I will kick you out."

"I love you."

" __________ "

"I love you so much."

"Stop it."

"I want to marry you, one day when we're adults. Small or big wedding, or none at all, whatever you prefer."

"I'm being serious."

"So am I."

You two look at each other, him holding his pen so hard that it looks like it's about to break and you looking at him as if he were the most wonderful and prettiest dense idiot you have seen in your life.

"What do you need me to do to make you believe me?"

He ignores you. Mostly because he knows that paying attention to you would just make him more annoyed (because you clearly weren't going to stop) and because he didn't want to accept it.

"Die."

A small smile comes to your mouth. How many people would get offended by that? A lot, but you knew Bakugō didn't mean it.

"You want to recreate Given now?"

Bakugō rolls his eyes, making more notes in his notebook, but you were able to notice a small smirk.

You had forced him to watch it a couple of months ago, and he swears he didn't cry. You knew the truth, though.

"Shut up."

"Shut me up yourself, you coward."

He lets out another scoff, and he continues to avoid your eyes.

"Study already."

You loved Bakugō Katsuki, and he loved you back.

No matter how much time it would take you, you were going to make sure to take his last name and hold his hand in a not-platonic way.

One day.

"I love you."

I totally didn't use like 3 grammar online correctors, and re read this like 20 times (It will still have an issue, and I know it). I also didn't copy inspired my introduction (?) from a random post.

Anyway, hope you enjoyed my bad writing style. Im not doing this again, unless I get REALLY bored.

521 words.

[burrowkit]

because adding on personal stories is my thing, here's mine!

And it kind of turned into a rant.

Anyways, tldr; found a poster of asexuality on the wall in my high school. I then learned a lot about it, and consider myself half in the closet/up the sleeve.

People keep trying to ship me with other people, like I'm a character in their favourite TV show/book series/movie series. I don't really need or want people to do that, I just want to excitedly talk about the events of my day/life, both about what happened in the day with people or telling other people about what I did.

The Story

So, my high school decided, as something the GSA (Gay-Straight Alliance) was going to do, was post different sexualities and their definitions on the walls of the halls in the school.

It was super cool, because I got to learn about all these different sexualities! My grades Kindergarten (there's 2 years of Kindergarten for me) to Grade 7 were in a Catholic school.

Now, I'd like to point out that my Catholic school actually had a class called Family Life or something like that, which apparently led to me asking about all the details on how babies are created in Grade 1.

That school system was super on the "we're teaching our kids all about pregnancy". I remember in grade 1 they had us start doing the math (without reaching us about multiplication yet), about how it starts with 1 cell. Then 2. Then 4. And we had to do that for a bit. And then they were like "yeah, and it's still smaller than the tip of this pin".

BUT, they didn't talk about LGBTQIA+. Which, yeah, sucks, but it also meant I didn't know anything about it.

{Minor side note, but my first time hearing the word 'gay' was it being used as a slur in Grade 9 (public school, different province) because I had a bestie and we were close. And my bullies were determined to believe that anyone I hung out close to, I was dating. And therefore, not a lot of friends at the time. So my mom then had to explain what it is, and how it's not a bad thing}

Anyways, I'm walking down the hall, and I liked to read the different sexuality/gender signs because it was cool.

Then, in the hall, I pause, re-reading the poster.

Pretty sure all it said was this:

ASEXUAL

Not sexually attracted to other people

Or something like that, I can't remember. And I just paused. And I thought it over. I'm pretty sure there was more, and it also defined aromanticism (?) as well, which was eh.

And it's just like: "Wait, that's a thing?" All the other sexualities I had seen, were all super like "okay, yeah, sounds about right".

They had polysexual, pansexual, bisexual, maybe homosexual. Transgender. I think they had agender or non binary. Probably cis-gender (to explain what it means). I can't remember them all, but they were cool to learn about!

And there I stood for a moment, replaying every moment of my life. Every time I lost a friend because people starting "shipping" me with them, and they didn't like me like that (and I'm going "of course you don't, we're friends"). Things started to slowly click.

I did start to tell some of my friends at the time "hey, I think I might be asexual". I didn't run around telling everyone that.

I learned a lot from tumblr and facebook. I remember finding a site called asexual . org or . com or something. I remember seeing mention of people coming out as ace by saying they had a card up their sleeve.

Then I learned about so many more sexualities and about romanticies (okay, I'm not up on all the terms).

For the longest of time, my mom insisted that I not use ace or aro as my labels, because she wanted me to be open about changing in the future. But that's the thing.

The more I ventured into the community, the more I saw (because by that point, I was moving onto reddit) how open and accepting the ace community can be. I mean, tell them that A stands for Allies and they'll be storming the castle...

But I loved how they loved and supported each other. How they were all "you know, if this is a temporary thing, at least know that people accepted you for who you were. Maybe you were seeking shelter temporarily. It's okay. Just don't run around and accuse other aces / aros / agenders of being in a phase".

So, I had to use grey ace and grey aro when around family (which kinda hurt, but anyways).

These days? I'm not super open (in real life) about it. I mean, if anyone asks, or I'll drop hints about it, all good. Most people in my life know that I'm aro ace.

I used to use the labels as a way to keep people I suspected of having crushes on me, to keep them from asking me out. No idea if they actually did, or just people messed me up enough not to recognize f/m friendships, but anyways.

I still sometimes confuse a squish (as far as I can tell, basically a crush, but you want them as a friend not as a romantic/sexual partner) for an actual crush, which is incredibly confusing. But no, it's just a squish.

I've mostly managed to cut people out of my life who constantly ship me in real life.

Ever seen those posts from fandoms about people shipping 2 characters together for a romantic relationship? Yeah, that was me for like, Grades 10 through my community college and even my first couple/few years working in a professional environment (probably should have gone to HR/a manager, oops).

No joke, pretty much a conversation I had with a friend. I should mention this happened when I was going through school for being a developer/programmer/dev. A suspected diversity thing the college was doing, they had all the women in the program in each class. That meant 1 woman per class. Each group had the same schedule.

"Hey, so you've been talking a lot about *enter key*. So, are you dating?"

"Um, no?"

"Why not?"

"Because I'm not interested in him that way. I'm aro and ace, I told you that before. *has to explain the whole thing again because friend is confused*. We're friends."

"But you talk about him all the time."

"I also talk about *shift key* too."

"Oh yeah, so, are you crushing on him too?"

"NO!"

Like, my friend, chill, I was one gal in a class of like 20 dudes. Of course I'm going to make friends. Of course when talking about my day and what I did, I'm going to talk about the people I was with and what we all did.

This conversation pretty much repeated every time I saw her. I hung out with maybe 5-7 guys pretty regularly, about 2-3 different groups (of 2-3 guys) that I floated between to hang out with between classes.

I once vented angrily to another friend about said friend above, and their response (a guy) was "oh, yeah, you and *enter key* talk a lot. You should date"

Like... you missed the point. I do NOT like *enter key* that way. I like hanging out with him. I like hanging out with our mutual friends. I feel relatively safe around them.

I got an "oh, well what about *space key*".

Anyways, tldr; found a poster of asexuality on the wall in my high school. I then learned a lot about it, and consider myself half in the closet/up the sleeve.

People keep trying to ship me with other people, like I'm a character in their favourite TV show/book series/movie series. I don't really need or want people to do that, I just want to excitedly talk about the events of my day/life, both about what happened in the day with people or telling other people about what I did.

I need to prove a point to my mom. Reblog if you can realize you’re asexual/aromantic in your teens.

[lukolabrainrot]

Calm theory Anon here 🩷🩷🩷

Guys today has been a glorious day filled with so many gems. From Luke photo shoot to the tik tok to Nic commenting. So many great things happening. I want to touch on a couple things. First thing Luke's new found confidence when speaking. His body language and his tone showed me he was so much more confident in his speech and thoughts. That happens when you're confident in yourself. Before if we think back he would wait for Nic to speak and agree with whatever she said. I'm not saying he never spoke what he felt. But the man was holding part of himself back. He was comfortable letting Nic take charge in interviews. Now his tone is strong and his answers are well thought out. That only comes with inner growth which happens by a lot of self reflection. Our boy Lukey did the work he needed to grow. And I'm here for this Luke which just makes him hotter in my opinion. Now I wanted to touch on Luke and Nic presence online with each other. Do I believe more going on positively then we think? Yes. I think they are together. Do I know for sure? Nope I (unlike cough others cough) will never say something as fact when I'm not apart of either of their inner circles. But one thing I'm going to keep stressing is these photos are a moment in time that was capture correct. As you know a moment is fleeting and we can't really tell any type of story using moments right. So do we know what is happening BTS? Nope we have no clue but we do know from their own mouths that they have a special relationship. Do we see that online? Nope and until they come out officially as a couple we won't. We will get the likes and comments if we are lucky because let's be honest the way the fandom has treated them both we don't deserve that. They are not going to be lovey Dovey online. They just aren't. They won't until they announce that they are a couple. Now one thing we have to remember is Luke and Nic are their own people. Luke has his own projects and goals outside of Nicola. Nicola has her own goals and projects outside of luke. They have both worked their asses off to get where they are in life. But because they blew up on the same show and as a couple it's so easy for fans to link them as one. They have to show they are individuals. So yes we will get content where Luke doesn't mention Nic and times Nic doesn't mentioning Luke. This is normal and healthy. They are their own person. Also I have to remind people Nic has Luke number she knows him. She can call him and congratulate him in person. So that comment she left wasn't in my opinion just for him. It was for the Lukola fans and to show her support. She doesn't have to like or comment on his stuff. It was to show the haters that they are good. That's what they want us to know at this time.

Exactly, agreed!

Today was a great day for Lukola fans imo, and I'm still riding the high!

And I found it particularly interesting that a certain subsection had to come in LOUD with their bs today in the more positive Lukola spaces. Could everything we got today been so L/N coded that it made this subsection anxious... hmmmm, I wonder 🤔