#i vividly remember when i read the books to my mom as a kid

[writingoddess1125]

Could we have more of Price with his 3 kids and his wife please?

Love your wiring btw, I don't normally go poking into other fandoms but you got me reading outside your cod stuff too

Thank you! ❤️ And I'm glad you're enjoying the other fandoms I got here!

And Also- Per request!

How Did You Know?

FemReader X John Price

OOC Sons and John Price

Micheal 15, Moses 11, Emmey 6

Family Fluff + Some very mild suggestive themes

<<< Masterlist

The Price family was having a Lazy night in.

Currently watching some random ass comic book movie, John laid across the couch with you laying on him, your back to his chest and lower body tucked between his legs. Emmey asleep on your stomach as you rubbed his back gently.

The mountain of half empty chinese take away was on the table waiting to be picked up later as Moses sat on the floor engrossed in the movie and eating the remaining of his orange chicken.

Micheal half watching the movie and scrolling through his phone laying on the love seat.

It was peaceful and at least for John a perfect night-

"Hey Dad,"

Moses suddenly spoke up snapping John from the movie, the boy tilting his head back to look at thw two of you cuddled into each other.

"How did you know you were gonna marry Mum?"

John raised a brow. "Why ya wanna know?"

Moses shrugged eating another peice of chicken, seeming the age of 'Why this and That' seemed to have kicked in.

John glanced at you with a smirk before looking back at his middle child.

"Oh, well that’s an easy one actually, It all started at a really crazy party."

Michael perked up a bit and looked away from his phone. "A party?"

John nodded, scratching his beard a bit.

"Yeah. Your mom and I met there since a mate of mine decided to throw one on his first leave after graduation and we were all doing dumb shit- And thats when I first saw your Mom- Doing Jello Shots in the kitchen"

He smiled as his hand did a arch over his head like it was a magical moment. Making your eyes roll.

"We clicked instantly, talked all night, and decided to meet up the next day for a lunch date."

You groaned a bit at the memory and start to giggle. "Worst idea ever."

"Why?" Michael asked.

"Because," John grinned, "We were both horribly hungover."

The boys giggled while you shook head remembering this vividly. "I remember I crawled down the stairs of my flat and barely made it to that restaurant."

John nodded in agreement.

"So there we were, barely functioning, sitting across from each other. We didn’t even bother making conversation- we just ordered food and got straight to eating."

He paused, smiling at the memory. "I remember looking up from my doner meat and chips, feeling like my soul was finally coming back to me, and there was your mom devouring her food like it was the last thing on earth- Not a ounce of care in the world."

You snorted a laugh. "Hey, it was that or puke on you."

John chuckled. "And that’s when it hit me I thought, Yeah. This is the one. I could look at her every damn day like this-"

The Moses shook his head at this clearly not truly understanding "That’s so weird!"

"But also kinda sweet, So you essentially knew youd marry Mum from the first time you met her?" Michael questioned.

John nodded and kissed the top of your head, smiling at you softly. "Pretty much."

You blushing softly and looking up at him with a gently smile on your face.

"And after that thought- I immediately took your Mom back to my flat and we ban-"

You smacked his arm so fast to stop him as a blush went over your cheeks. John laughing hard as Michael immediately knew what his dad was about to say and wrinkled his nose.

"Gross-"

He grumbled, John still chuckling to himself.

"Well you had to get here somehow so don't complain-"

John cackled, as Moses turned his head to the side confused.

"What do you mean? How Michael got here?"

Moses asked as you covered yohr face with your hand and giggling mostly from embarrassment. Trying to keep Emmey from walking up still as John continued to laugh, Michael looking back at his phone shaking his head.

"Wait but what does that mean??"

[salamander-spark]

My first fanfic! I'm proud of it even if it's a little rushed. I barely managed to get it out within the day. Tomorrow's prompt might just be a drawing.

Day 1:

Hug/Cabin 7/Shapeshifter

Fic below:

TW: very brief depiction of a panic attack, description of nightmare.

It had been a month since Vee's mom and sister came back from the boiling isles.

The stress Vee felt the few days it took for the return was immeasurable. A worry for her family took root in the back of her mind, it made sleep nearly impossible, and gave her nightmares.

Waiting for months, no contact, no words, no way of knowing if they are alive. No magic. She'd be found out, spreding herself too thin with Camila and Luz's responsibilities, inevitably slipping up. People from the town gazing upon her demonic form. The eyes of Belos's monsterous form looming behind everyone. her family, Luz's friends all dead they couldn't stop him THEY COULDN'T COME HOME THEY WERE DEAD HE KILLED THE —

In the present, Vee shook her head to dispel the images her imagination made. She remembers the dreams vividly, still occasionally seeing them in her sleep.

The week following their return, she found the pamphet Masha handed her. Blushing (But NOT because she remembers making a fool of herself in front of them), she decided it was time to take up their offer. 

And it turned out AMAZING, Masha's gradoise flair really fitting the tour guide gig. It was just like back at Cabin seven when They waxed poeticly about the many pagen dieties and what they did. 

Vee kept up with Masha's narration, interjecting questions when she thought of them, keeping the conversation flowing. Vee told Masha about herself, and Masha shared stories about their friends. An aching Vee didn’t realize she had in her heart began to fade talking to her friend after so long, but only slightly.

Masha didn't know that she knew them. For all they knew, they were talking to a complete stranger. The person they talked to couldn't possibly be the shy, anxious girl they shared a cabin with. She couldn't be the friend they helped bring out of her shell, who looked at all things mundane with innocent wonder. She wasn't Luz Noceda.

The insecurity persisted, became even bigger after Masha invited Vee to hang out with their friends. Diego, the tall, relaxed boy who let his hair fall onto his face and probably had a million zits on his forhead. Samantha; or rather Sam, who had a love for video games and anime, and rambled about them to the captivated audience of her friends. 

Neither of them knew her as Vee either. It was awkward, but managable, getting to know them a second time. She noticed that they were each more comfortable in conversation than when they were back at camp. They were all less reluctant to share the information about themselves that took them weeks to share at camp. Vee supposed she was also more confident, staying in a cabin with each other must have been to thank for that.

She didn't know how long she could keep lying to them, for her own sanity.

"Say," Masha began, "What about those kids you were hanging out with? They're your other friends, right?" 

Vee, lying belly down looked up from the Cosmic frontier book she was reading. "Huh? She got so invested in the plot it took her brain a while to process Masha's question. 

"Y'know, at the historical society, right before Halloween," Masha clarified. "You guys asked me about that rebus remember? That one kid was going on like, 'Grahh chop off my ear' or something," Masha giggled. 

Oh. Luz's friends. Vee knew the witches also considered her part of the group, but it was easier thinking of them as her sister's friend group.

Wait... They didn't have a proper cover story! Vee was terrible at lying on the fly, but she needed to start talking now!

"O- OH YEAH, that was Gus. H-hes pretty fun. Then theres uhhh, Amity with the pink hair, Willow had glasses, and... oh yeah Hunter too but he was at our home that day." Vee needed to stall so she could come up with something.

"Is he The Blond cosmic frontier fan?" Masha asked, which confused Vee.

"When did you see him? I don't remember him going to your job after we left."

"No, I actually saw them at the haunted hayride! oh, I guess I only told you two-" Masha points two fingers at Sam and Diego respectively "-about that since you weren't hanging out with us back then. Whoops~"

Suddenly, Diego piped up. "Wait, you said 'Our' Home. So they like, live at your place or something"  

CRAP!

"Uhhhh well... you see." Think of something Vee, just spit it out. "Foreign excange students?" she thought out loud. "-From out of state not another country!" she amended in a panic.

"O–kay?" Sam raised her eyebrow "I've never seen them at school before, and you know I watch people like a hawk." It was true, back at camp, Sam compiled a list of the campers from other cabins activities in order to know who to watch out for. 

It wasn't a skill she thought would be used agsinst her.

"Well, There are other schools in the area you know? I think they went to, yknow..." She didn't know the names of any other high schools. "...Not Gravesfield high?" She finished with a shrug. And also, they went back to their own rea-" DONT SAY REALM "TOWN like, right after Halloween, so yeah, that's why you've never seen 'em" She finished with a shrug and a manic chuckle.

How did she keep this up for thee months straight? She must've lost her touch. Then again, she considered not having to lie as a good thing.

"Sure, I'll accept that." Sam relented.

"Hold up, am I missing something, or does that like. Not make sense." Diego once again came in with his terribly timed questions. "Cause like, you said they lived in your house, why wouldn't they go to the same school?" How is he so perceptive!? It must be because he doesn't devote much energy into responding so he can listen better.

Masha put a hand on her shoulder "Hey, sorry about him Vee, if theres something you don't want to tell us, you don't have to." assured Masha. "We didn't mean to push so far." Masha turns toward the offender, "Diego." They enunciate.

Vee didn't her most of what Masha said. Where Masha tried to reassure her, Vee only heard an accusation. 'something you don't want to tell us' sounded more like 'You're hiding something, aren't you Vee.' And what did that last part mean? Could they tell she was panicking? WHY DID THEY SOUND ANGRY?

They'reGoingToForce AnswersOutOfmeNobodyTrustsMe-

Everything turned blurry, she was hyper aware of all the sounds of the room closing in on her. Her heartbeat was in her ears, everyones voices blended into a cocophony She needed to get away She's clammy and very sweaty-

It's queit, what changed, is there still danger?

She heard breathing, not her own, someone elses, not her own, and it makes her realize how quick she's breathing. She tries to slow down, matching the pace of the other person. 

When she finally steadied herself (it felt like several minutes but also less than one) She opened her eyes (They were closed?) and sees Masha sitting on her knees on the bed in front of her (She doesn't remember getting into this corner). They continued to demonstrate the breathing exercise, which they also did with their hands.

Vee thinks she remembers something like this happening at camp, but isn't sure right now. Masha gestured their hands out wide, clearly asking if it was okay if they could give a hug. 

You don't deserve one, her brain tells her. No, she shakes her hehead.

Masha sits with her, and they both breath. Such a simple act, filled with so much understanding. You doesn't deserve Masha. 

She's now aware enough to know how mean she's being to herself. She spots her other friends sitting in the middle of the room, Dego on the floor while Samantha sits in the desk chair. She gives a meek wave and they wave back without keeping eye contact. They look ashamed, Masha must've given them a talking to.

"Hi guys, sorry you had to see that," she knew she shouldn't be apologizing, but this whole situation never would've happened if she was truthful from the beginning. 

"No Vee, this wasn't your fault." Says Masha

Sam adds in "We're sorry. Diego said he should've realised before he asked that. And I'm sorry for getting so uptight about answers." Sam makes eye contact at the end, though it almost looks like she's scrutinizing Vee's face-

-She spins to look at the mirror and sees a splotchy mess of skin on her face. One could confuse it for vitiligo -a skin condition she learned some humans have- if not for the fact her face was previously a single solid shade of brown. 

Her hair is now completely blue, and a bit shorter, exposing her ears in their full glory. They must've been flapping like crazy during her panic attack.

Her sclera was blue, and took on the glossy sheen of an amphibious creature. 

None of those are human traits.

Her head snaps back towards Masha, cringing while waiting for a reaction.

"So..." They began. "I um. I like your ears?" They clerly want to say more, but refrains to be polite. "Once again, I don't wanna force you to answer. I've just got a lotta theories in my noggin right now and I would like to know the truth. But again, no pressure. Whetever the truth is, I'll try not to react badly." They finished by putting their hands up and smiling. 

Both looked at their friends who nodded. "Hey I'm cool with you being a shape-changing spirit, or some cryptid, or whatever you are. Again, I'm sorry." Sam smiles.

Diego nods and says "Ditto, what she said."

"And if you're not ready right now, we trust you. We just want you to be comfortable with us. You can talk later

Now was the time to come clean to her friends. It wasn't because she was backed into a corner. They let her keep her secrets if she really needed too.

Her eyes tear up, and the tears wetted her cheek. They trust her.

Hopefully they stayed true to their words. Here goes nothing.

"Um, Let me tell you about a place called the Boiling Isles"

She shapeshifts into her true skin for the first time in their presence.

Sam fellbackwards off her chair while Diego simply said "woah." After squeaking in a high pitch, Masha just stared, taking in the details of her true for  from her tail to her hair.

She could’ve eased the group in better, could've given them a better idea of what to expect. But flowery speeches were Luz’s deal, and Vee wanted to rip off the bandaid.

She hoped they  would share Mom and Luz's opinions on how non-threatening she looked. Masha looked far from disgusted at least, but she had no idea what was on Diego's mind.

Sam lifted her chair to defend herself, before realizing how it looked and set it down. Vee only now remembered Sam has a fear of snakes, Ophidiophobia if she's correct. 

She considered apologizing, but decided against it, given this whole thing was mostly Sam's fault. She could be petty, she deserves it. She's definitely getting around to it later though.

they let her explain herself in full, with no interruptions. She told them about the titan, demon and witches. She wasn't quite ready to tell them how she was born, but she told them she pretended to be Luz for the summer.

Everyone's eyes grew wide at the admission, and it looked like they had something to say. Then they looked in her eyes and she gave a look that said she never wanted to hurt them.

She didn't expect them to start joking around so quickly after several earth shattering revelations, but she could tell that they wanted to lighten the mood before discussing them.

They were also being super frustrating about the cute comments.

“I'm not cute. Luz calls everything cute, like. Possums, for one.” She scrunches her face, “and she didn't even bat an eye at a bunch of talking rats!” 

“Your face looks like a cat,” says Diego, his mouth curved in an uncharacteristicly mischievous grin. “But like, a bald cat that fell in a can of green paint.” He teases. 

"Hey, you up for that hug yet, Vee?" Masha smiled that pretty gap toothed smile, and Vee felt her resolve shatter. 

"Y'know what? yeah. I could use one." Vee agreed.

"Want to make it four?" They asked, to which Vee nodded.

Vee tightly hugged Masha, and they embraced. With Vees hace in the crook of their neck, she wrapped her tail around Diego who had moved behind her. "Sweet" he simply remarked.

Masha looked at where Sam sat crisscrosed, hand hovering over Vee's tail hesitsntly. "Hey, you know she's not slimy, right?" Masha indignantly asked. "She's also warmer than I expected, she barely even feels like a snake. More like what I imagine a dragon would be like." Masha blinked "Can you turn into a dragon?" Masha almost shouted.

Vee shrugged, Sam insisted "But do I have to?"

"Yeah, get over here dummy!" Vee wrapps the end of her tail around Sam's midsection. Vee thinks she looks a bit pale.

"Geez it must be 'everybody bully Sam hour' today! Really, I'm still sorry," Sam defends. 

"You were a jerk, you owe me something expensive!"

Diego and Masha laughed at Sams expression, Vee leans deeper into Masha's hug. 

"You okay Vee-Vee?" masha softly asks.

"Yeah," Vee looks around at her friends. getting an idea.

"Cabin seven!"

"HOO HAA HAA!" chorused four voices

"I love you guys." whispered the shapeshifter amongst her closest friends.

[witchy667]

TDLR- My first awakening with my wolf when I was about 9 years old.

(TW for mentions of intense Christianity and some swearing)

So I don’t know when exactly I started feeling so connected to wolves. I partially think that it’s because I’ve always been animalistic/wolfish. So there wasn’t much of a “separation” when I was young cause that’s just who I was if that makes sense. I never thought my behavior to be odd cause I just did it. I had a lack of self control with impulses and instincts as a child. That plus my wolf tendencies and natural chemical imbalance made me seem a bit concerning I guess. I started collecting stuff and making art for wolves starting at age 6. I actually taught myself how to draw because I loved wolves so much. Learned just so I could draw wolves. So by age 9, I had a good collection of wolf affiliated items. I kept them in my windowsill. Had a mask I made by hand, a tail, snowglobes, stuffed animals: you name it. Around the age of 8 to 9 I was also looking into witchcraft to figure out a spell to change me physically into a werewolf. I would memorize different spells so I didn’t even have to read it off the paper while under the moonlight of the full moon at 12 AM. So I could focus fully and send my energy. I tried this multiple times. Being a kid, not knowing that the Internet had history my dad and stepmom found out. They thought that I was possibly possessed and was worshiping the wolves as a false God or idol.

They first forced me so sit down and watch quite a few possessions along with exorcisms after they “found out”. After that semi traumatic experience they forced me to get rid of all of my wolf stuff. Legit sold everything then made me physically destroy and rip up my art. I remember vividly ripping up a mask I worked on for months that got me attention in an art show. I was bawling and so angry but I’d rather me destroy it than them. I still regret that to this day, but what choice did I have? After that my dad and step mom no longer allowed me to behave “wolfish”. No more walking on my tiptoes, no more wearing a tail, no more rough housing, no more running on all fours in any regard, no more wolf books, somehow I was blessed they didn’t take my forest privileges away completely. They deadass even took my door OFF its hinges. For like a year straight. 🥲🙏 So it’s started being a huge fight to be my full self. But I never gave up regardless of their restrictions.

(Now to the awakening, lol. Sorry it’s so long, context was just needed to understand fully this next part)

One day my dad and step mom when on an out of town trip for a few days. (I was 9 at this time) So they hired our baby sitter Jenna to watch us. She decided to take us to the zoo to do something fun. (This was in upstate NY so it was a big zoo with lots of people, NOT NYC though!! lol) We got to the zoo and walked around for a while, obviously I only cared about the wolves. But I think Jenna knew that so she wanted to look at the wolves last. We make it through a majority of the zoo and I see the wolf cage. I’m immediately excited, I noticed right away as we were approaching that there was hella people and kids around the cage howling to get the wolves attention and to come close. I also noticed the wolves on the side of their enclosure eating, I don’t remember what it was expect it being red meat. So I knew that the wolves didn’t care as they were being fed the one or two times they could be in the day. Lastly, I somehow knew in my soul; in my bones; that if I stepped up to the cage it wouldn’t matter. They would come.

Then the world kind of drowned out. I didn’t really comprehend or see all the humans around me or even notice/care about my babysitter or brother’s presence. It was like I moved without thinking and just did what my instincts told me without thinking about it as I do it. I walked up to the cage and tilted my head back and just howled with my whole being. I shit you not both wolves stop eating and came over and sat right in front of me and stared at me. I opened my eyes and see them and I almost started crying. I noticed all of the strangers staring at me in disbelief along with my brother and Jenna. I felt in that moment that I am a wolf and no matter what they take from me they can never take me from me. They can never take the wolf away because I am a wolf.

So when my parents came back from their trip and my babysitter told them about the experience, it was so validating because after everything that they tried to do to break the connection it still didn’t work. And it just helped me know that no one can take it away. And it was the biggest fuck you and the wolves are with me. And I’ll cherish that memory forever.

Sorry for the super long wall of text I just really wanted to express this here because I thought it could potentially be relatable in some aspects. Along with this is definitely a part of my wolf journey.

[monstersinthecosmos]

If it's okay to ask, when and how did you get into the vampire chronicles? Love your fics btw !!

thank you!!!!! :D

I think the short answer is: I fell asleep watching the IWTV movie when I was 10 but I always remembered it and then a few years later I stumbled onto the book and went OH THERE'S A BOOK! and then I was done for.

But I'm trying to warm up to write so I'll give a long answer too 🤓

so like, I saw some of the IWTV movie when I was like 10 or so? (I'm old so it was 1998 when I was 10.) My friend wanted to watch it, it was like my Rich Friend when I was a kid, I remember distinctly that for some reason we had the opportunity to watch it in her mom's room on the big TV LOL so we were in there. I started watching horror films when I was like 6 and my anti-censorship parents didn't believe in even restricting R rated movies in the house so that all wasn't a big deal at all, and by age 11 I knew like all the words in Fright Night and From Dusk Till Dawn from watching them so much so I was excited for VAMPIRES!

HOWEVER, this movie was like a LITTLE too grown up and dry and I didn't really get it? And I know I fell asleep!!! 😂😂😂 So I have a really vivid memory of the rat wine scene, and that was about it. I'd also seen the last minute with Tom Cruise pulling the lace out of his sleeves on HBO one night or something, and those two parts like REALLY stuck with me vividly!!!

Cut a couple years ahead, now I'm 12. I'm having a sleepover at my best friend's house and she was like my baby bat friend that we like, discovered goth stuff together and got weird together and supported each other becoming the Weird Girls in school right? And we'd have sleepovers and stay up all night lighting candles and listening to Orgy and other silly music of The Year 2000 and we'd write like little RP stories about demons and whatever.

So we're sitting in her room and I'm just kinda spacing out and I see the word Vampire on one of the books on her shelf, and my like Baby Bat radar went off and I went WHAT'S THIS, A REAL ADULT PROPER NOVEL ABOUT VAMPIRES?? I don't think I'd read any! My friend was like "Oh yeah I stole it from my mom" !! lmao.

It was the red paperback of TVL! You know, this version!

NOW! I'm very spoiler averse and always have been so like, when I opened it up and realized it was BOOK 2 I was like, oH i cannot read this, what's book 1. OMG IWTV? THE RAT MOVIE?????

idk why but that excited me SO MUCH. Like my imagination went crazy. And I don't remember how I read IWTV, I might have gone and taken it out of the library? But I went back and read IWTV first!

(as a side note, the sleepover friend died when we were in our mid-20s, I just always want to pay respects when she comes up because what a special and influential person who was in my life at the exact right time and I will love her forever !! I cried about her in the shower last night out of nowhere lol.)

And like I was SO in love with IWTV and with the writing, like the writing just really spoke to me and like, changed the way I thought about mundane things so much! I think this was during summer break and I remember while I was reading IWTV, walking to my friend's house at night became SO sensuous to me, I remember looking up at the thick green leaves in the trees and like having that Anne Rice language in my brain just had me losing my mind constantly. EVERYTHING became so poetic to me and so beautiful, I was seeing beauty everywhere I looked.

Looking back like, one of the experiences I have of VC is that because I read it so young, I've had the chance to reread the books every so often and like, as I got older I'd get more and more out of them because I was like a kid and my reading wasn't very strong so there are definitely parts of the story that went over my head, either because my comprehension just missed it or because I was too young to like understand deep complicated emotions, idk?

But I got started on them that summer! It was sooo exciting. I used to peek at the page of Anne Rice's other works at the front of the book and it had all the VCs listed and I remember like, really enjoying the book and I would just be like giddy with excitement that there were ALL THESE OTHER BOOKS and I couldn't wait to find out what was in them?

For some reason, HBO or Starz or somebody was playing IWTV alllll the time that summer so I kept noticing that it was on and I was trying so hard to resist because I wanted to finish the book first and then watch it, and I remember at one point I was like WHAT IF I JUST TURN IT ON TO SEE WHAT SCENE IT IS?! and I turned it on and saw when Armand introduces himself and I was like ARMAND??? THERE'S A BOOK CALLED ARMAND! HE HAS A BOOK, HE MUST BE IMPORTANT??!?! I wasn't up to that part of the book yet!!!That was quite exciting.

But YEAH BASICALLY. That's how it started, and I spent the next two years reading VC! Looking back I don't actually know why it took me so long, because I know like, once I got a book I'd finish it in like 2 or 3 days LOL. Probably I was saving money to buy each book or I had to wait for my mom to take me to the library or something. Merrick was the most current book, too, and I was so excited to CATCH UP and then when I went to buy it I realized it was a MAYFAIR CROSSOVER so I had to take a few months to do the Mayfair detour LOL.

So anyway!!! That's basically what happened! It was like 2000-2001 and it was also the time when I discovered fanfiction ! And I had time to like, post a single VC on FF.net before the FF.net purge where they axed the Anne Rice categories and banned porn LMAO. When fandom moved over to LJ I had gotten into writing for other fandoms so I kinda fell out with the VC fandom. I also became really upset with Anne Rice when she had the Amazon meltdown and I was very fucking done supporting her for a really long time until I was recovering from a bad breakup and one night decided to get stoned and reread TOBT and it drew me back in.

I also coincidentally had fallen out of fandoming and writing fic for like, idk 8 years or so. When LJ died I just was so exhausted and gave up writing fic, and there's a whole other story about how my creative values changed when I was in college blah blah. But then like, some years went by, it was like 2016 or something and I decided to do a VC reread (stoned again, too, oops LOL) and I had made a silly meme on FB and my friend told me it would succeed on Tumblr. I was like I DIDNT KNOW THERE WAS A VC FANDOM ON TUMBLR??? But she was right and the meme did in fact blow up but it's on my old account with my real name so no one has to know it was me. But I went OH WOW THERE'S A FANDOM! So I created this blog to join the fun. 😂

And then like, I was rereading QOTD and I had just recently discovered AO3 (because remember I've survived several fic purges now I'm like, damn where are the kids posting fic these days lol) and would you believe how scandalized and upset I was when I went to read Devil's Minion porn on Ao3 and there WASN'T ANY LMAOOOO. So I was like, goddamnit, I have to write it myself lol. And that's how I got into writing VC fic as an adult after an 8 year fic hiatus. SO THAT WAS THAT that's how that happened that's why I am here today because I made really cool friends on VCblr and I decided to stick around.

This got longer than I intended but it was nice to sit here and bullshit for a minute, sorry if this was more information than you asked for. 😂😂😂

[joyfulpeanutpirate]

Great Writers- and Me.

This being my first Tumblr post is a little scary. I actually, for what it's worth, don't know much about Tumblr. I just know it's a place I can write blogs, which I've been wanting to do for a while. Just have some where I can dump my thoughts, stress free. I suppose this is where I share a bit about myself. For one, I live in America, which is a shit pot to say the least.. but life's not bad. Just, hard. I love nature, collecting trinkets, writing, art, poetry, plants, aliens, my bed, and so much more. My favorite drink is Dr. Pepper or I suppose green tea, and my favorite color is burgundy. NOT MAROON. Ironic as someone who's colorblind I have to tell people that yes...they are different colors. I guess now I'll touch on the title for this blog. I love reading and writing. It's something I've been passionate about since I was little. When I was younger I was the kid who when they got writing assignments they'd get more paper to staple onto their original page, even back in kindergarten when creating our own gingerbread man stories. There's lots of things I remember vividly, my class assignment stretching across the class room floor because it was so long being one of them. For reading, I was competitive. I wanted to win, to read the most, and by 3rd grade I had a college reading level. Flash to now, I own so many books I feel like I'm drowning any time I pick one up. It still feels good though.. when my mom brags to her friends and our family that I'm reading this and that. I've read a lot of books, especially classical literature wise. Osamu Dazai, Edgar Allen Poe, Agatha Christi, John Steinbeck, Fyodor Dostoevsky, and so much more. With the modern day being the way it is, I don't see a future where my writing is remembered if I do publish anything. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't mean I will pursue a STEM career over my passions, I just wish someone would see what I can do and who I am. I want to be known, maybe not a great, but I want someone to read my work and feel seen.

Really seen.

With AI and it's progression, media consumption, and just the modern age... I feel hopeless. But, (yes I'm using but at the start of a sentence) I want whoever does read this to know, not to give up. It's never pointless to create. Even if it goes nowhere. For now though, it's late for me. So I bid goodnight, or goodbye, to you.

Book Rec; Out by Natsuo Kirino

Sincerely, Celia

[fortune-maiden]

Warrior Cats Reread #1: Into The Wild

Some friends decided to organize a group read of the Warriors series and since I grew up with these books and loved them a lot as a kid I decided to join in

Idk how far I'll get into this reread (my hope is to at least finish the first arc) but I thought it'd be fun to write up some thoughts as I finish the books :D

iirc I first read Into the Wild when I was in middle school after a friend convinced me to try the series and my mom bought me the first book of the og series & new prophecy during a family trip (possibly to make me less whiny since I remember being very bored on that trip and I think I was actually almost done with Into the Wild by the time we were heading back xD)

Anyway, I remember reading several of the first series books multiple times but for some reason never the first one. Which is a shame because its a great book and I remembered some parts of it pretty vividly! The conflict with Brokenstar and him training young kits before they were ready, Yellowfang's exile and friendship with Firepaw, Tigerclaw murdering Redtail and Ravenpaw being a witness and being forced to escape at the end or risk losing his life... There's a lot of good stuff!

Also Spottedleaf I guess.

Actually the #1 thing I remembered from this book is that Spottedleaf dies and it is very sudden and weird and for some reason she becomes Firestar's Lost Lenore in later books. I thought maybe they had some meaningful scenes in this book I'd forgotten that showed them building a bond or her being kind to him at a time when most of the clan regarded him with suspicion...

But nope! It's exactly as I remembered xD

Maybe most of this bonding occurs after she's a force ghost?

Although she died a lot further into the book than I expected so there is that I guess!

Other things of note:

Bluestar my beloved! I vaguely remember her being my favorite character as a kid and I still love her!

Yellowfang my other beloved! I still love you so much!

Ravenpaw is a good bean who deserves the world. And also wow was Tigerclaw determined to kill him in this volume!

And speaking of Tigerclaw killing cat-people, I could have sworn he was responsible for Lionheart's death but I guess not? Maybe?

I had completely forgotten that Wind Clan was a non-entity in this book, having been driven out. I vaguely remember them being pretty helpful in this arc and then turn into the worst clan later

There is so much murder and attempted murder and talk of murder in this children's book series and I wouldn't have it any other way <3

Overall Into the Wild is a great first entry into the Warriors series that eases the reader into the setting and the way of the clans (even if you can kinda tell things were still being figured out at this point). Brokenstar makes for a great first antagonist to be defeated at the end, while a more sinister threat looms in the background raising more questions and mysteries for Firepaw to explore in later books

[honestmouse20]

In honnor of the 20th anneversary of Evanescene's album and it now being back on store shelves, have some thoughts I have on it!

I used to listen to it, back in the day lol. When it came out. I can remember vividly my mom singing it in the car. It was one of the few things that we were allowed to listen to that wasn't 'traditional' christian music.

At the time I didn't even know what any of those words meant. I was 5 afterall lol. But growing up, my view on faith was a weird one. I thought it was a cool concept but, to me, it felt like an interesting book that I wanted to write my own twist ending for. I played pretend like *i* was the one coming back from the dead and stuff. (Yk normal kid things)

And now, looking back 20 years later, despite this album and artist being a 'christian' band, their music still holds up. To me at least, it's probably because they kept the more epic side of things. Being a literal broken person and needing help. Yk all the immagry from the song Tournequte. It still is so cool to me because, even tho I firmly don't follow any religions, the message is still interesting to me and I can honestly interpret it any way I wish. Kinda like having a friend who's christian and they get comfort from that, and me being like, that's good I'm really glad you have this thing that comforts you. yk?

I love the mesh of genres too. I'm bad with names and this is jsut a ramble so I'm doing no research to make this post. But I love how it's a good mix of grunge, early early emo, and christian rock. Like the songs Fuck and they have that signiture flare lots of rock ajacent genres had around the time it came out. The cool beeping at the end of Going Under, I think. And ofc the infamous Wake me up duet thing. I read somewhere they were pressured into that by their label, having a guy do a 'rap'. But it was very iconic and to this day is one song by them that I guarantee everyone probably knows. Or at least can recongnize. I also love how you can have heavier songs like Bring me to life and then the super soft ones like My Imortal. Which, the latter always brings me to tears bc it's so fucking beautiful and haunting and Defined my fucking emo phase.

Also, also fuck if I don't talk about the vocals I will die. I grew up listening to this album and her others. I know the words by heart. I knew them today in the car listening to this cd even tho I havn't played any of these songs since highschool (2013-2017 era). They stuck with me. I taught myself to sing by parroting these songs. And I don't think anyone would disagree with me about how fucking *amazing* of a singer Amy Lee is. She is incredible and honestly I respect her so much. She went out and wrote these songs about loving yourself and finding yourself and fuck what everyone else thinks. It's like, yeah theres the undrlining of god saving you but she also doesn't sound like the majority of the christians nowdays yk? She's not condeming anyone else. She's simply saying that she found comfort and herself through That and that's what saved her. And honestly I respect that so much.

TLDR: Despite being 'christian rock' this album and band are So good and honestly people who call it cringe clearly did not listen to the same album lol

[katriniac]

OMG you are in folk fairytales and legend Please can you tell me some of the cuteer ones you found even better if involving bears ? I loved interact with your OC too thanks fir joining and pls relax too from time to time and do not rush in answering me either 🙏🙏 I wish you a wonderful day 🤗🤗😘😘

Yesssss, I love them! Since a very young age I have been an avid reader/student of folklore, fairy tales, myths, and legends. 

Below I talk more about my personal history/feelings on the topic, and end with my three favorite fairy tales. I hope they are “cute” enough for you!

But first I wanted to answer your question about stories featuring bears.

I tried to think of one in my memory where a bear played a prominent part, but turned up empty. I mean, yes, there is the standard “Goldilocks and the Three Bears”, but I assumed you wanted to hear about something off the beaten path. 

So I dug around and found this one for you:

"The Bear in the Forest Hut". 

It is a Slavic folk tale about a prince who was cursed to take the shape of a bear, and the brave and kind woman who helped him out of that curse. She had the typical misfortune to have a stupid father and an ‘evil stepmother’ who tries to stop anything good from happening to the heroine. 

I liked this one because there is plenty of detail about the trials and tests the girl goes through in order to earn the bear’s trust and break his curse. Even more unique is how the story doesn’t just end right when the curse is broken (like so many folk tales). Instead, it goes on at length about how the two get married, travel over his kingdom, and what happens to the stepmother and stepsister.

@queengiuliettafirstlady What are some of your favorite fairy tales and myths?

How did I come to love fairy tales so much?

I think I can trace it back to my godmother, who was an amazing storyteller. She was Irish, so most of the tales she told me came from the British Isles and dated back to the 12th Century or earlier. The stories I most vividly remember her telling me were about the 3rd Century charismatic (but slightly foolish) folk hero Finn MacCool (or Fionn mac Cumhaill) and his very very clever wife Sadhbh. 

As I entered my preteen years (1990s, pre-internet era) a library was built within a 15 minute drive from our rural town. I had never had such a frequent exposure to books before that, except our small school library. My mom would take me to the new public library often and I devoured every book they had on fairy tales and legends.

When I started college, the trend of turning ancient folktales into modern, dark retelling had begun to rise in popularity. Not only was my backpack full of those every week, but now I also had access to scholarly papers through our inter-collegiate online system! I could read published research on people all over the world, those who retraced Charles Perrault’s steps, or compared similar narratives, or discovered a new translation of an old work. It was also during my college years that I discovered The Aaarne-Thompson-Uther index, which categorizes the plots and themes of fairy tales. 

When I learned about Perrault and the ATU Index, it changed my self-image.

Of course kids like fairy tales, but we are expected to grow out of those stories as we mature. I still had a deep love of folklore and myths well into my 20s and that made me feel a little silly and childish. But when I discovered that Charles Perreault (a historian in the 17th Century) believed the stories being shared in the oral tradition were important enough to be written down for posterity, that boosted my spirits. And when I stumbled across the ATU Index (begun in 1910, and continues to be updated annually still to this day), which took fairy tales seriously as anthropological artifacts, I was vindicated even more. 

These historical efforts were proof that folk lore, legends, and fairy tales weren't just for children. 

This short article is a MUST-READ for anyone who wants to have their love for storytelling rekindled and get pumped up to talk about fairy tales. It’s all about hope and courage.  I especially appreciated the excerpt from Katherine Rundell when she talks about “the hope that is sharper than teeth”

As I studied more and more obscure stories from around the world, I soon had a list of my top 4 favorites that I came back to:

Katie Crackernuts

The Twelve Dancing Princesses 

Beauty and the Beast 

The Myth of the Selkie

The middle two I have owned a few printed copies of. They are quite common and have many retellings/variations. But Katie Crackernuts was a story I could only read online; I had never seen it in print. 

There are actually similarities between parts of all three stories, which is probably why I love them so much.

I know you asked for ‘cute’ ones, but I don’t know if these really are that adorable. They all have happy endings for the heroines. Does that count? LOL

Katie Crackernuts (collected by Andrew Lange, first printed 1889)

This is a Scottish story about two sisters, one plain but clever (Katie) and one beautiful but simple (Anne). Despite this difference, they loved and supported one another as much as two sisters could. Through no fault of her own, Anne was cursed (you guessed it, by an evil stepmother) with the head of a sheep (or sometimes a donkey or goat, depending on the version) because the stepmother was jealous of her beauty. Katie put a hood over Anne to disguise her and left the house together, never to return.

They eventually came to the kingdom where there was a sick prince. His parents offered rich rewards for anyone who could heal his mysterious disease. Katie knew there had to be a reason normal medicine wasn’t working. She thought perhaps he was under a curse, too. Yep, he was going out at night in a trance to go under a hill to dance with fairies. So she watched and listened and investigated until she discovered the cure and how to administer it. Turns out the way to lift her sister’s curse was under that hill, as well!

She out-smarted the fairies, collected the items from them, and followed the instructions precisely. He grew well and discovered he loved her during all their time together while she was patiently investigating. When she used the cure on her sister, Anne’s sheep head turned back into a human one and the prince’s brother fell in love with her on the spot (of course he did). It was a lovely double-wedding. 

The Twelve Dancing Princesses (collected by the Brothers Grimm, first printed 1812)

This is about twelve sisters who are constantly tired and ruining their expensive shoes every night, and no one can find out why. The king has offered rich rewards and even marriage to the most beautiful of his daughters, but any man who steps up to the challenge either dies, fails the task, or is never seen again. Until one clever man (who has been watching this happen over and over) decides to try solving the mystery. The eldest sister (the most intelligent and haughty of the siblings) tries to stop him each time, but he outsmarts her as he follows the princesses into a fairy forest where they dance all night until their shoes fall apart and they drop from exhaustion.

Just like Katie in the story before, he is observant and waits until he has all the information and proof he needs to confront the princesses. He convinces the king, who is angry that his daughters were escaping every night. The man explains they were under a spell that compelled them to sneak out. The king offers him the most beautiful daughter (who is also the youngest and the most silly), but the man opts to marry the eldest because she was the only one who came close to matching wits.

Katie Crackernuts has much in common with The Twelve Dancing Princesses.

Both have very strict rules for entering into the world of fairies, and the “wasting sickness” that comes upon a human who spends too much time in that world (which is also a metaphor for other maladies that were rampant during those centuries, such as tuberculosis). I enjoy that theme of “Good luck if you’re beautiful because your looks won’t save you. You need to be wise, patient, and clever in this world.”

Beauty and the Beast

This was one of my favorites long before Disney made their movie. Almost everyone knows how the story goes, so I won’t make this long post even longer by summarizing it here. The bravery and selflessness of the heroine was very inspiring to me, and I loved the idea of being surrounded by talking furniture and not a single human! I was a very introverted kid. And I guess I loved the idea of a sad prince in an unloveable disguise who needed to feel loved.

Another thing I think is neat about that story is there is an actual author: Gabrielle-Suzanne de Villeneuve, published the story in 1740. Most folklore and fairy tales have a shared origin and no single creator. Not so for Beauty and the Beast. This one has a bonafide author, which makes it unique. Not only that, but the author was a woman! 

What Beauty and the Beast has in common with Katie Crackernuts is charity, mercy, humility, and selflessness.

The heroine not only saves herself, but she saves those who are entrusted to her. Who needs a prince, right?? Katie didn’t have to leave home to take care of her cursed sister, but she did. She didn’t have to agree to help the sick prince, but she did. Belle didn’t have to sacrifice herself in her father’s place in that unreasonable pact, but she did. She could have been disagreeable, rude, and throwing herself a pity party the entire time she was captive in the Beast’s castle, but instead she did her best to keep her spirits up and not hate her captor. (Readers: don’t come at me with the whole “Stockholm Syndrome” comment trying to be witty; it’s an old joke that was never funny in the first place.) Katie also tried hard to make the best of an awful situation, and she was never resentful to Anne or put her on a guilt trip. I was inspired by the important values and virtues portrayed by these two heroines.

The Legend of the Selkie

You asked for ‘cute’ stories, but this last one is anything but cute. The Celtic legend of the Selkie is heartbreaking, and there is hardly ever a happy ending. I heard briefly about it as a kid, but never found a published story to read. The oral tradition of the tale goes back to the 13th Century, but it didn’t make it into many books. Then the movie The Secret of Roan Inish came out in 1995. I was 15 at the time and didn’t have my driver’s license yet, so I begged a family member to bring me to the only theater in the entire state that was showing this independent film, over an hour away. It was magical. I bought the DVD as soon as it was available. It was the only thing I could find at that time (remember, the internet wasn’t really used for entertainment in 1995 like it is now) that displayed the Selkie myth, which is:

There are some special seals in the sea who can shed their seal-skin and turn themselves into human women. They are beautiful, quiet, and hard-working. And therefore they are much sought-after as wives by the lonely fishermen of the islands. The legend says that if you find a Selkie in her human form and take her seal-skin away from her, she is yours for the rest of your life. You can imagine the life of servitude that awaits the poor woman! She is usually desperate to turn the house inside out looking for her seal skin and return to the sea, or if she doesn’t find it she will murder her husband.

Fascinating!

Oof, okay. That post went on really long. Sorry. When I start to talk about fairy tales and folklore, I have a difficult time keeping it short, lol. And I didn't even get into the Greek myths! Yikes.

[ceterisparibus116]

4. What’s a word that makes you go absolutely feral? 7. What is your deepest joy about writing? [this one made me laugh, so I'm sending it too lol] 14. Do you lend your books to people? Are people scared to borrow books from you? Do you know exactly where all your “lost” books are and which specific friend from school you haven’t seen in twelve years still possesses them? Will you ever get them back? 19. Tell me a story about your writing journey. When did you start? Why did you start? Were there bumps along the way? Where are you now and where are you going? 24. How much prep work do you put into your stories? What does that look like for you? Do you enjoy this part or do you just want to get on with it?

Thank you so much for these!

4. PERFUNCTORY.

It's such a fun word! Say it out loud and tell me it isn't amazing! One of my friends say I use it too much in my writing but I don't care? It's amazing?

7. Already answered here. 💖

14. I do not lend books to people because they're MINE. My "lost" books are all truly lost books and I alone am responsible for their fate. Will I ever get them back? Probably not.

Actually, I'm not solely responsible for all my lost books because some of them were destroyed when my parent's house caught fire and yes, I grieved the loss of my books more than the loss of anything else (except one (1) thing).

19. Ooh, I love this ask, and since the prompt is "tell me a story about your writing journey," I'm gonna get blatantly self-indulgent here.

I vividly remember when I started writing which makes me so happy because my memory is crap.

Okay. So. I was 8 years old. I was sitting at the kitchen counter. My mom was making lunch. And I said: "Mom, I wanna write a story about our guinea pigs." And she said: "That's great."

I then proceeded to get blank yellow-ish paper (because it looked cool) that didn't have lines, and I exclusively wrote with the paper turned horizontally (why???), and I almost exclusively wrote in a tiny little "studio" I built in my closet that was just me sitting cross-legged in front of a box turned upside-down.

That said, I started storytelling even sooner. I don't even remember how young I was when I started. But I'd play with toys (mostly stuffed animals, but also Barbies and Star Wars action figures), and I'd narrate everything they did out loud. The fun part for me was choosing the right words (I'd even re-do a "scene" if I didn't narrate it "correctly") and hearing it out loud.

I was, however, absolutely enraged to discover that one of my brothers had been sneaking into my room and hiding under my bed to listen to me. In hindsight, I realize it was actually a compliment. He just liked my stories.

The main "bump" in writing was that I was initially writing stories the way that I narrated playing: literally just recording whatever the characters did, with no real intentionality and no real vision. Which is fine, except that it made it really hard to build to anything within the story, and made it almost impossible to find a satisfying ending.

But eventually, I started reading books about writing, and that really helped me figure out the mechanics of storytelling. And far from turning writing into something boring and technical, it gave me the tools I needed to actually write a story from start to finish. I completed my first story when I was 10 years old: it was called "Betsy the Pug" (inspired by my grandparent's pug) and it was a solid 40k words.

(My dad had this thing where he'd read stories out loud to my brothers and me when we were kids, and he was still doing that for us at this time, so he got really excited over the idea of reading "Betsy the Pug" out loud to everyone. I was mortified.)

I also owe a huge debt of thanks to the Warrior Cats books, which inspired my first series. I wrote five books on dog tribes and some of the later ones in the series were actually decent. This was also a great lesson for me because I sent the first book to the editor of my grandma's books (she's an author), and the editor graciously gave me feedback. Obviously it sucked to hear "this isn't publishable" (which...duh, I was like 12), but I turned right around and started trying to implement her advice. That memory probably wouldn't be so meaningful to me but for my dad (thank you, Dad) regularly bringing that moment up as an example of a time when I received discouraging news and not only didn't quit, but sought to find something good in the situation (by taking the advice).

Where am I now? Nearing the 2 million word mark of fanfiction. (I am absolutely going to throw myself a small party when I hit that milestone.) Also working on publishing some original works. More on that to come. ;)

24. TOTALLY DEPENDS. Okay, well, with all stories, I think it's important to know generally how the story ends. You want to be able to say "This is what the story is about," and it's hard to do that without knowing how the characters change. And even with short one-shots, I care about leaving characters in a different place than they started (otherwise I wonder why the story "mattered"), so I still try to know something like: "Matt accepts help" or "Foggy learns to help Matt in a different way."

On the other end of the spectrum, we have the Ella series, or my Trust fic, both of which were incredibly complicated and required very detailed outlines. Trust specifically required a lot of research as well. The whole time I was writing it, I was also researching the related issues.

That said, a lot of the things that might be considered "prep" work are things I do as I write the story. Like with Trust, where I researched both before and during the writing process. Or with the Ella series, where I'm still fleshing out the outline for Redeemed.

I find that when I force myself to do all the "prep" work up front, I run into two problems: the first is that I lose all inspiration for the story (having spent it all on prepping, instead of on writing); the second is that I get too locked into ideas that sound okay initially but are just less good than the ideas I come up with later as I'm getting to know the characters and plot elements better.

Do I enjoy the prep work? Eh. Not a ton, lol. I enjoy moments of connecting dots, which sometimes happens in prep work. But I'd rather just be writing.

[oddcryptidwrites]

15 Questions

@unmellowyellowfellow tagged me in this and I'm gonna leave it as an open tag so I can get more of these tag games done! if you see this and want to play, consider yourself tagged!

For this one, I'm feeling spicy and I'm going to switch to a different WIP. Let's meet Onila and Sursia Kina, two siblings who work with the rebel group, the Watchers. Onila is the Kain (leader) of the Watchers and Sursia is the Watcher General and former Director of DragonKnights.

(From World of Ateine! @thetruearchmagos you might want to see this one)

1. Are you named after anyone?

Onila: I was apparently named after a grandmother somewhere in my lineage. Onila is a relatively common name on Ateine though, but everyone knows me as THE Onila Kina. Sursia: Like Onila, i was named after a distant relative and Sursia is a pretty common name. However, we've made a pretty good name for ourselves. Kina is not common.

2. When was the last time you cried?

Onila: I will admit, I get emotional a lot quicker than I used to. It was probably a week or so ago. I don't remember exactly. Sursia: Three or four days ago? There was a new clutch of pygmy fire dragon eggs found near Dragonsbreath. The population has been dwindling due to poaching and the Knights were able to go in and relocate the nest further from the city. One of the older dragons I used to work with was a pygmy fire dragon from that area and it reminded me of her.

3. Do you have kids?

Onila: I have a daughter, Acceber. She's currently 8 orbits old, and currently studying in the primary school at Base Sky. She stays with me in my loft. Sursia: Unless you count the sheer amount of dragons I've helped raise and train over the years, no. I don't think I'd want any either. my niece is enough.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Onila: I use it a lot in day to day conversation, but when doing Kain-related things, I have to be pretty straightforward. Sursia: Sarcasm isn't used often in the Knight's Sign, so it's not something I naturally tend to use. I can pick it up pretty well...sometimes...

5. What's the first thing you notice about people?

Onila: Allegiance. It's easy to take one look at someone and tell by the clothes the wear, the way they hold themself, and how they react to me. Sursia: Probably if they choose to try and speak to me or if they just speak to Onila or Larepo or whoever else I'm with.

6. What's your eye color?

Onila: I'm a coreblood, meaning I have lineage from four partages, and one of them is red-blood fiend. My eyes are technically brown, but they have an odd reddish tint from that red-blood fiend partage. Sursia: Same as Onila.

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

Onila: Scary movies! Sursia: Happy endings. We have enough scary shit going on in our world.

8. Any special talents?

Onila: I am an AMAZING shot when it comes to arrows, probably the best of the Watchers but I suck ASS when it comes to guns. Sursia: I can lift over [800 pounds] of dead weight over my head, if that counts. Other than that, I think most people would say Knight's Sign is a special talent, although it's the language I use. It's shared amongst the Dragon Knights, as most of us are deaf from dealing with the dragons (which are insanely loud, by the way. I could get my hearing fixed if I wanted to.

9. Where were you born?

Onila: I was born in the Lakaj region, one of the southernmost regions on Ateine. It was the dead of winter, we were snowed in, and dad was on duty, so it was just mom and Sursia who had come to visit and help mom once I'd been born. Sursia: I very vividly remember Onila's birth because we were snowed in for the next eight days afterwards. I was born in a hospital in the Asaf region, which is in the big central mountain range on Ateine. Dad was working in the Heart of Hell at the time.

10. What are your hobbies?

Onila: I don't have time for many hobbies but I have been spending a LOT of free time trying to read through the entirety of the Holy Books. You'd think I'd be done by now but there's a LOT of them (like hundreds) and they're all super dense and super long. Sursia: I spend most of my free time at Dragonsbreath, which is about [4 hours] from Base Sky where I'm stationed. It's usually assisting the new Director or just taking care of the Dragons.

11. Do you have any pets?

Onila: His name is Rebme and he's a pygmy fire dragon from the same clutch of eggs as Sursia's Terme. He's about the [size of a Great Dane] and while he technically is supposed to stay over near Dragonsbreath...but he escapes and flies over pretty often. I visit him whenever I can and one of my old friends takes care of him. Sursia: I used to have Terme, but he was poached for his scales. He was still a baby too. I still care for many of the dragons at Dragonsbreath although I don't consider them pets, really.

12. What sports do you play/have you played?

Onila: Combat simulators are a favorite of mine, but I also played a lot of [a sport similar to soccer] when I was a kid. I rode dragons a lot while working with the Dragon Knights, but I never got into professional soldier level type stuff. Sursia: Unlike Onila, I've spent almost fifty years at Dragonsbreath and rode dragons as a Knight for many many years. It takes a lot of strength and willpower to control them. I've also done some [rodeo-]style riding to saddle break new dragons.

13. How tall are you?

Onila: [5'11"] from the top of my head to my feet, [6'5"] if you count the top of the wings and I'm holding them all the way folded. Sursia: I'm a little shorter, at [5'8"], from head to feet, but I've got larger wings, so I'm also [6'5"] when they're folded. I used to be very clumsy. That's a lie. I still am.

14. Favorite subject in school?

Onila: I actually enjoyed my religions courses most. History was a close second, but only because they related back to a lot of my religion courses. I didn't really get into politics until I got into the Watchers' government. Sursia: I sucked at academics, but if I had to choose, it'd probably be animal biology. It prepared me for some of my Dragon Knight work.

15. Dream job?

Onila: While I enjoy being Kain (leader of the Watchers) I'd love to go back and join the Dragon Knights. Or (don't tell anyone) in an alternate universe, I could have joined the Sanctum. I was super religious as a kid, but it's faded as I've gotten older. Sursia: I think once I'm done with this General thing I'm going to go back to being the Director of the Dragon Knights.

[milo-is-rambling]

Continueing the adventure of my last posts tags and reliving my childhood fears and general existence in my family which I have subconsciously packed away and literally have not been able to remember chunks of my childhood even when trying to remember what I did as a kid 👍 anyways back to it. Snuck into the bathroom. Didn’t puke. Win for drunk and high Milo. The bathroom door however is the loudest creakiest door in existence. Getting in here she for sure knows I’m awake. Now it’s her choice to attack with the trying to talk to me or to completely ignore me or to continue waiting and watching to attack her bait (me trying to exist without her involvement for like any amount of time) also there’s been a development. It wasn’t the living room or kitchen lights on making the hallway light up it was her bedroom door open with her bedroom light on. So good news bad news. Good news. She’s not in the living room. Less of a chance of her trying to talk to me. Bad news. Shes in her room and the door is exactly fully visible from the loud ass creaky bathroom door so if she’s in the main part of her room she will see me if she looks for me. I could camp out in the bathroom until her lights turn off. (Side note. All of this. Is how I legitimately thought of my life as a child. I was a mommy issues ninja. I was sneaking from room to room when her back was turned and trying to sneak away to read my book in silence or make my dolls have gay sex.) this reminds me so vividly of my childhood. My brothers bedroom had one of those humidifiers that had fish in it (not real fish they’re plastic like 2D fish) (someone please know what I’m talking about) but he had it and it kind of made like a bubbly sound and I would hear that through my bedroom wall all night and I would hear sounds of light traffic outside cause we lived in a small town it was mostly nature sounds and crickets and frogs and occasional dog barks. And the sound of my window fan going constantly on high and I would climb in and out of bed and watch the way the moon lit up the neighbors roof and I would watch the grass blow in the wind and in the morning I would walk barefoot through the dew and pick dandelions and walk to the bus stop in the cold with my cute little jacket and backpack and it felt like home and it felt safe and I was happy and I had friends I can’t believe life isn’t that anymore. I just heard my mom close her bedroom door score!!! We outlasted her. Also ps I’ve been sitting in the bathroom on the floor with the bathroom light off and the door completely closed and locked. I have mental health issues. I’m on a stealth mission my mother isn’t aware of at all and it literally just living her life and doesn’t care whatsoever what I’m doing. Anyways. Yeah. Being a kid in Maine everything just felt right and I’ve gone back to Maine and it’s just changed. We couldn’t even go inside the house I grew up in. And even if we could it would have all been different. We sold half our shit when we moved to New Hampshire when I was nine. Mom and dad couldn’t find work. But they found a job working at the same company together in New Hampshire so we sold half our shit and moved and rented a house that we went on to buy and call home for eight years. And then we moved to Florida and dad died and I went to Maine for the service. The house was different. Even from the outside. My grandmothers house no longer felt like home either. I was too tall. My head hit the ceiling fan when I walked. My grandparents were now at least six inches shorter than me and nothing in their lives had changed since I was a kid. Except for the heavy thick layer of grief and the feeling of death looming at the door. Now I know that’s dark but my grandfather is on his way out and my grandmother is losing her marbles. And both their kids died before them so like yknow I’m cutting them some slack here. They can live the same exact routine in life for twenty years who am I to judge if they get the same brand of puppy calendar every year with the same dogs in the same themed photos for every month just the

Dates are switched who am I to judge. Or when my grandfather buys a bar of hersheys dark chocolate and stores it in the fridge so it’ll break apart instead of melt in your mouth. Or how every night they watch the local news the weather then whelk of fortune and jeopardy back to back and then my grandmother puts me to bed (idk what she does now) and my grandfather shuffles his way to the dining room they never use that they only really use for storage and a singular big table and chairs set with a laptop on it (and a weird podium looking thing with a penguin candy jar on it all year round for some reason??) to watch his random shows or long ass documentary YouTube videos for hours and get seventy old person only computer viruses that we then have to help him deal with cause that laptop if the biggest source of joy in that man’s life. And then my grandmother gets ready for bed and eats a little dessert on the stool at the foot of her bed where her personal teeny tiny tv is to watch her law and order or her ncis or her bones or her whatever show is always on at night and plays the same like two seasons as reruns back to back. God I love them and their silly little simple life and I’m so glad I have that little slice of home. I will always be welcome there even if I am too big for the house and everything in it is fragile and all the furniture literally rattled when I walk bc my grandmother has weird taste that is like 70% china and 30% glass. Anyways. I love them and I love that house but I don’t feel like a kid there. I feel so so so out of place if anything it makes me sad to come back and realize that the only thing that’s changed that whole time is me. And now dad being gone obviously. And their health getting worse. But yknow. It’s there. And I’m thankful for that. I just wish I was still close with anyone there. We have my moms friend who I knew when I was a kid and don’t get me wrong I love their house and they’re so nice and goofy and redneck as fuck but the daughter I was once close friends with as a small child now doesn’t even talk to me or like look my way at all if I’m there so it also feels completely out of place now. They even fucking replaced the playground at the middle school. Like there is no where in my original home town that I can go back to and feel like a kid and it tears me up. I cannot physically describe how badly I need to go back to my elementary school in Maine and just walk through the halls and sit in the library and the computer lab and play outside on the playground. Truly the ages of 6-8 were the best years of my life cause when I turned nine we were either getting ready to move or had moved so eight was when I could still me a kid. Fuck. And then I finally felt like I was setting roots in New Hampshire and felt like I could almost breathe again they told me we were moving to a hot humid retirement / party state with alligators and sand instead of NORMAL GRASS and pine trees (sorry I am a proud sod hater give me real grass I hate not feeling like I can walk outside barefoot it is all rocks and fire ants and fake grass and spikes cactus evilness.) and now I live here. And my mom loves it. She is so happy and I just feel like I have no where else to go. I have no family or friends in the part of New Hampshire where we lived. I have no choice but to start over here. Either I start over here fully or I have to start here long enough to get out of here and start someone else to be broke and scared except also now you’re completely alone. And not even your mom who you adore but also kind of hate and you think she hates you but you know it’s just your brain saying that bc of course she loves you but also like… does she tho? Or is she holding the vow to you the same way she did to her husband. Telling anyone who would listen “I promised god and my dad that I was married to that man til death do us part” and then right after he died she’s like welp time to get back out there and she’s all happy glad about all this freedom she has now I know she’s like that with me I know she only loves me because

She has to she only loves me because I came out of her and me and my brother are all she has of my dad but my brother looks like him but acts like my mom but I act like my father and look like her so there’s that added self hatred if she looks at me and sees herself and wants to fix fix fix what isn’t hers to change about my life. And then I act like him and then there she is living alone with her dead husband again except no it’s his bitch of a daughter who will never love you as much as he did and it will forever be in the back of your mind even when you love me I will always be his child too. And you will never forgive me for that. She would leave me if I could handle it out there in the big bad world alone. I am the runt of this litter and I haven’t quite decided if I really want to survive it or not. It being life without constant attention care and devotion. And survive meaning is it better to have caused the pain now and make her proud later when I could just stop trying and let myself turn to dust in this room locked in from the outside watching shadows under doors and listening to the frogs croak outside. Summer heat settling in across my bedroom as I sneak out of bed and read my book with my flashlight until my mother walks by and yells to go to bed again. And the pink nightlight is illuminating the corner of my room with my Barbie’s and I want to play and feel like a kid again. I wish I could trade and be that kid for a day again. I want to play and feel free again and run just to run before my body started to hurt and ache and before I ever cut myself or held the gun in my hands and had to put it back down. I wish I could tell the childhood version of me that it gets better and it gets worse. You have to remember it all cause it’s gonna get lost in there. Really try to remember it all. And enjoy it. I’m proud of you for just being you.

I think I should drink every day forever actually if it makes me suddenly remember my childhood I’ve repressed for some reason that would be nice I could therapise myself thru poetry and long rambles that I throw poetic shit into and then call poetry even tho there’s really like three lines that weren’t completely off the dome. Anyways goodnight sorry for being your most annoying mutual forever ily I might delete this tomorrow

[mintybreakfast]

I remember reading a certain book when I was a kid. It was about a young boy with autism iirc, and I enjoyed tagging along with him on his adventures. It almost felt as though we were friends. In the second-to-last chapter, he died of exposure while trying to rescue someone in the snow. I cried my eyes out and Mom even comforted me through it. It had a very real impact on me.

There was no indication at the time I began reading it that anything disturbing or upsetting was going to happen. No "trigger warning" or Advisory of any kind. It caught me by total surprise.

But I wasn't mad at the publisher or at the author. Instead, I was deeply impacted by the story and by the impact that the protagonist had on his family and his friends. I still vividly remember that scene.

I think some people forget that some literature and some media is meant to be deeply uncomfortable and unsettling. It's meant to make you have a very visceral reaction to it. If you genuinely can't handle these stories then you are under no obligation to consume them but acting as if they have no purpose or as if people don't have a right to tell these stories, stories that often relate to the darkest or most disturbing parts of life, then you should do some introspection.

[the-126-family]

You are completely good! So glad the audiobook is coming out on the same day so you don’t get it spoiled!! Woody Harrelson being the narrator would be so cool! I would actually try and listen to the audiobook to see if it would stick. I have a horrible track record with audio books lol I always lose track or get so bored bc the voice is slow or monotone. I honestly love all of the characters but I think my favorite book would have to be Mockingjay! I once was told it was the most boring in the series (and it may be for some and that’s ok) but I love the twists and turns and the such complex emotions from Katniss and the rebuilding relationship with Peeta? Has me screaming and kicking my feet. Favorite part about Hunger Games are the emotions specifically in the book and Katniss’s relationships with everyone. You can see the way her and Peetas love grows in real time and how she loves Gale but then watches as he turns into something darker because he’s a traumatized teen who’s being taken advantage of just like everyone else and Katniss has to make the moral decisions like losing a loved one or losing an entire group of random people and her relationship with her mother and her depression? Don’t get me started I will start screaming again because it shows the complexity of knowing her mom couldn’t control her feelings and despair of losing her love but also the bitterness because Katniss was only eleven. *distant screams* ok I went on an entire ramble there- Songbirds and Snakes was so good!!! I loved the book and the tiny details revealed that just connected everything to the main stories. The movies are always so good it genuinely impresses me. Only series i actually like as well as the books besides the Maze Runner! Don’t worry about rambling, I do it all the time and it’s fun to hear your thoughts!

UGH THE COMPLEXITIES IN ALL THE RELATIONSHIPS!!! You're so right -- I loved how Katniss and Peeta's relationship grows and develops! And how she realizes she can't live without him because he represents hope even in the darkest of times. I think my favorite book and movie was the first one, but I had such a crush on Johanna Mason in the Catching Fire movie. I was obsessed with her.

Oh yeah the relationship between Katniss and her mom was so complex! And Katniss and Prim's cat Buttercup (hey, I just realized we know two pets named Buttercup now!). I remember just crying in the movie theater watching Mockingjay: Part II when Katniss broke down and screamed that Prim was never coming back. But I love the ending with her and Peeta and their kids in the meadow. Perhaps the same meadow that Lucy Gray once took Snow to!

Speaking of Lucy Gray, The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes changed my life. You're so right about all the small details that connected to the original trilogy! It was so fun to find new stuff out. I vividly remember reading the first page and being like "Tigris and Snow are COUSINS?!?" -- it just boggled my mind. I was looking forward to that movie coming out for so long. I actually was going through some hard stuff when it came out and I was so glad I had that to look forward to. That movie changed my life. Rachel Zegler as Lucy Gray was incredible! Her singing! Her acting! Life changing!

And the character of Reaper too?! Being the first tribute to take a stand and acknowledge the shared humanity of the tributes, say "no, actually, these are all kids and they are just like me" and gathering their bodies and pulling down the Capitol flag to cover them? It being a precursor to Katniss covering Rue with flowers and Peeta painting the portrait of Rue for the judges in Catching Fire? Like the parallels!!! I'm always all about the parallels! Like how Lucy Gray and Katniss both curtseyed! I loved that!

And omg, you like the Maze Runner too?!? Those books used to be my OBSESSION! For like two or three years I literally thought of nothing else. Newt was my favorite character and I just never got over his death. Like, never.

This got long and I apologize, but it's so much fun talking about this stuff!!

[chorusfm]

Liner Notes (May 18th, 2024)

Buckle up—we have a lot to discuss this week. This week’s supporter Q&A post can be found here. If you’d like this newsletter delivered to your inbox each week (it’s free and available to everyone), you can sign up here. A Few Things * One of the recent member-only episodes of the ATP podcast was all about “computer origin stories” or “first computer memories.” I’m roughly the same age as Casey and Marco and their core memories and histories mirrored mine quite a bit. And hearing them talk about their origin stories had me thinking about mine. My first memory of seeing a computer was in first grade when there was a computer in the elementary school library. Maybe an Apple IIGS? It was too long ago and I don’t know for sure. But a found family film makes it pretty clear I spent time with it. (Cool haircut first grade Jason.) I remember playing games like Carmen Sandiego. However, it wasn’t until middle school that my memories of using a computer start to solidify. I can remember vividly the computer labs at Twality Middle School. This is where I can remember my obsession beginning. At some point my parents bought a home computer for “the family.” It was a PC running DOS and Windows 3.1. Look, I’m very clearly old. I’m 41 and remember typing book reports on a typewriter before that computer. And this is when my obsession went into overdrive. I liked playing video games, what kid didn’t?, but I loved trying to figure out how all the software worked. I wanted to learn all the tips and tricks. I wanted to know how the system worked. Which meant I broke that computer. A lot. A lot a lot. I re-installed Windows on that thing from floppy disks more times than I can count. And this was where I first started playing around with Qbasic and did my first “programming.” My first memory of seeing the “internet” was at OMSI. My mom used to take my cousin and me there during summer vacation, and they had a computer lab. I remember downloading Simpsons WAV files and Dark Forces cheat codes, so this would have had to be around 1995, and I would have been around 14. At some point, breaking the family computer became a thing my parents got sick of, and my grandparents helped them purchase my own. Windows 95 and having my computer is where the already probably unhealthy technology obsession went supersonic. And this would be when I started playing around with HTML for the first time and soon after would begin writing what would turn into AbsolutePunk. That’s, best I can remember, my computing origin story. High school was primarily spent tinkering with PCs, installing various Linux distros, and using Windows throughout college. It wouldn’t be until around 2010 that I bought my first Mac. But, that’s probably a story for another time. * Anadivine was one of the hidden gems of the early 2000s scene, and they released a new 2024 remix/remaster of their album, Zoo_. It sounds great, and even if you never checked them out back in the day, it holds up all these years later. Also, if any labels read this and are interested in doing a limited vinyl pressing of the album, I can put you in contact with the band. Just let me know. * Aaron Mook, a contributor to AbsolutePunk and Chorus, has launched a GoFundMe to raise emergency medical funds for his cat. Please take a look if you’re able. In Case You Missed It * Review: Dua Lipa – Radical Optimism * Review: Keane – Hopes & Fears * Review: Broadway Calls – Coming After You * Review: Cold Years – A Different Life * Rise Against Announce New Tour * The Blood Brothers Announce Tour * Interview: Tony Lovato of Mest * The Used Announce B-Side Album * Alice Wallace – “Imposter” (Video Premiere) * Head Automatica – “Bear the Cross” * One OK Rock Announce World Tour * Avril Lavigne Announces Greatest Hits Album * Albums in Stores – May 17th, 2024 Music Thoughts * Lot’s of music to catch up on! Origami Angel released a new single, and it rules. I’m absolutely ready for a new Gami album. Their last… https://chorus.fm/features/articles/liner-notes-may-18th-2024/

[gayslutbehavior]

i really admire the way my mom raised me when it comes to books. she always let me pick what to read, and she usually read the same books along with me so that we could talk about them. she likes reading YA, so that helps. i remember she really liked a series of unfortunate events and would help explain some of the funnier lines that might have gone over my head.

if there were books that either of us thought might be upsetting or hard for me to read, she would read them first and tell me what she thought. she wouldn't say i could or couldn't read them, she would just give me a heads up about things that might be challenging. for example, when i was about 10ish i wanted to read the sixth harry potter book, and she told me (with permission wrt spoilers) that an important character dies and that she found it really sad and thought i might too.

there were also books that she read before me and said she thought would be fine and then i ended up feeling uncomfortable about it for some reason and stopped reading. so she knew she could trust that i would take care of myself when reading. i had a panic attack when i read mockingjay for the first time because the war felt so real, and i took a break, calmed down, and came back to it later. but i'm still really glad i read that book because i think it was really good and taught me a lot.

it was the same way with movies - i watched little miss sunshine for the first time when i was pretty young, and she didn't try to keep me from seeing the more inappropriate parts, but she did explain things that i didn't understand. the only part she warned me about was when the brother realizes he's colorblind and can't be a pilot and gets really upset. she said he's going to yell and it's really sad. it wasn't the sex or the raunchy humor that she focused on (she knew that i knew what sex was), but the parts that were upsetting or scary, which makes sense to me.

pulp fiction is one of her favorite movies and we had a poster of it on the wall in our living room, so of course i wanted to watch it, but she told me that i should wait until i was older, not necessarily because it was inappropriate, but because it's the kind of movie that's hard to follow and requires a lot of cultural context to understand. i listened and when i ended up watching it for the first time i totally agreed that i wouldn't have understood it when i was younger.

she used to watch house when it came on and most of the time i didn't watch it with her even though she never said i couldn't because i really didn't like the parts where it would show the inside of a body. if i did want to watch, she would fast forward through those parts for me. i vividly remember watching house with her when thirteen comes out as bi. she paused the show to explain bisexuality to me and it was a huge moment for me as a queer person! the fact that she didn't brush past it or try to hide it from me helped me to learn and grow in my own identity.

the point is, the times when i was most confused or upset or alienated by a piece of media, it was rarely because there was sexual content. having warnings from my mom helped me to be prepared for things that might be beyond my expectations, and with her help i learned how to process and move through those things instead of ignoring them. i also learned that it was okay to feel like i wasn't ready to watch/read something. and i think that's a much safer approach to consuming media than trying to prevent kids from seeing or reading anything challenging until they're a certain age. it's all a process of growing and becoming ready for that kind of thing imo

I keep seeing aggressive "don't let kids read Wicked, it's inappropriate!!!" posts, and they're deeply irritating.

Would I recommend the novel to a random 12 year old I don't know? Probably not! But I first read Wicked at 12, and it's not like it permanently scarred me. It's not like I couldn't follow the plot. I didn't understand all the sociopolitical and religious commentary at 12, but that's why I went on to re-read it multiple times throughout my life. I get more from it each time.

There's sex and violence, yes, but I knew what sex was at 12, and I was seeing violence and war on the news every day. Why's the fictional sex and violence worse? Why should a kid not challenge themself with a book outside their comfort zone? Every kid deserves the chance to wig themselves out with a weird book they don't fully understand yet, and Wicked was mine.

My wife is very fond of a Mitch Hedberg quote I think is relevant here: "Every book is a children's book, if the kid can read."

(Also I think it's weird that people fixate on the puppet sex and the BDSM club, and not the parts where Elphaba bashes someone's skull in, or Turtle Heart gets lynched, or the soldiers abduct Fiyero's entire family as political prisoners. The "sex is evil, violence is fine" moral panic is eternal.)

[luvdivy]

Nostalgia

Lately i've been experiencing so much nostalgia almost in a painful way. Videos have been popping up on my Instagram and Tiktok of my childhood, the late 2000's and 2010's and I've been looking back at old pictures and videos, cartoons, remembering old memories and toys. Elementary school projects, cooking creations, old music, and just remembering what my childhood was like. Vivid memories.

I know im really young still, but i remember my childhood so vividly. Everything felt so bright. When did it stop feeling that way? There is so much about life to love, but why can't things feel the same lighthearted-ness as it used to? Summer days and rain feel different now. Everything feels different. I can look at the same blue sky and still feel as though that blue sky from 2012 was bluer. Idk if anything im saying makes sense, but everything feels so isolated now. Idk, everything seemed so peaceful back then. Smiley, free, lighthearted, endless. Bright. Im a teenager, I have so much to enjoy and love about life. But I can't help but think about how things will never be what they used to be. I know that everything changes with time. But i miss it. and I wonder if we'll ever be able to recreate childhood again.

Elementary school, box tv's, cereal commercials, cartoons, music with lyrics we were too young to understand. Conversations that made zero sense, endless excitement, no pressure. Chapter books, disney movies, dvd's, recess, playing every single sport and having a blast, becoming friends with people just because they like the same color as you. Colorful cups and plates and bagged lunches, the excitement of your mom making your favorite food, wii video games with siblings and playing with chalk. Public pools and dairy queen in the summer, making up random games to play with the neighborhood kids, scholastic book fairs and dollar store bubbles. Summer sunshine and breeze, playdates, playgrounds, bike rides, gym class, school buses, sprinklers and weekday morning cartoons. Even watching the snow fall was different. This was my carefree childhood.

I love life, but it feels so isolated now. Im endlessly grateful for the amazing and bright childhood I had, but life doesn't feel the same anymore. And I really want to feel that feeling again. We all wanted to grow up so fast, but nobody ever talked about what being a teenager in an era of phones would do to the simple life we lived when we were younger.

Kids born today won't have the same childhood I had. That's not necessarily a bad thing, every generation is unique, but its just sad that something that isolates the world now may isolate children today.

Maybe one day i'll look back and cherish my teenage years, but nothing will be like my childhood. Recreating it is so difficult. I just can't believe how fast time is moving, I want it to slow down but it won't. That's something that's hard to accept. I guess all there really is to make the most out of the time we have. One thing they never tell you about growing up is the pressure and worries you put on yourself. It doesn't have to be that way, but for almost everyone it is. But I guess we have to look at the positives.

This rant probably made zero sense, and I hope someone can relate to me. There is so much to love about life, but sometimes it doesn't sit right with me that things won't be the same as they used to be. Hopefully, I can find peace with that in the future. Thanks for reading this long and messy rant <3