#i used 2 let ppl refuse 2 giv me ny at all
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wham wham wham wham
wham!
heartbeat heartbeat y do u keep me here
#txt#urggghhhhhhhhhhhh#brain wrms#ughhhhhh#lays face dwn on th ground#man#smetimes im lik#y am i so timid abt tlkn abt stuff i lov#y do i assume tht im bein a bothr so wuickly n readily#n thn i thnk bck 2 alla th times i bn arnd ppl who did see me as a bothr n tht ddnt care abt what i had 2 say#n i rmbr alla th times i was tlkn excitedly abt smth only 2 b shut dwn#n my heart curdles at it ykno#n lik idk it hurts n so its bcme rly scary 2 share th stuff tht mke me excited#n its easy 4 me 2 shy away n wanna stop#b4 i rly startd wrkn on it n allowing myself 2 demand space 2 tke up#i used 2 let ppl refuse 2 giv me ny at all#n its so simple n clear whn i tlk 2 my mom n stuff abt thngs tht she doesnt deem ‘imprnt’#thngs tht r imprtnt 2 her r Her Interests n also imprnt big decisions n also thngs tht mke her feel useful#but outside of thht its not worthy of her attn#i rmbr a coupla months ago i was tellin her abt my day#n lik#fckn mid sentence she pulls out her phne n strts scrollin vidoes on insta or fb or smth#lik she had alrdy bn since checkd out of wht i had 2 say#n she was th 1 tht askd me abt it#lik…… if i wna tlk abt smth tht doesnt get her immediatley n 1 of her categories#she chcks out n its lik she 4gets im there#it mkes me sad ig#n its nothng new#othr ppl hve dne it but not scenarios i wnna tlk abt
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