#i tried to go to bed like an hour ago but

[sturniqlo]

out the window- shy!matt x shy!reader

summary: shy!matt and darlings first ever argument

cw: ANGST; argument, crying, resolved angst, FLUFF; comforting, kissing, cuddling

an: sorry this took for fucking ever, my mind just went blank when writing this, but i really loved the idea so i couldn't pass it up!

masterlist | shy!matt x shy!reader | join my taglist

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matt wasn't one to ignore darling- or anyone in general, which was weird when he had ignored several of her texts. he was supposed to pick her up thirty minutes ago. maybe he was on his way and his phone had died? she thought. she waited for another hour. matt would never do this- he would never leave her waiting.

she decided to send one last text.

darling 8:51pm

hi babe... did you forget about our date today? i've been waiting for a while🫤

matt 9:02pm

omg! i'm so sorry. i had made plans with the guys... i did forget, sorry

darling 9:03pm

oh okay, have fun then :/

matt 9:05pm

baby, don't be like that

darling 9:07pm

*read 9:07pm*

she was upset- actually she was pretty mad. how could he forget? they had this planned for weeks! she was disappointed because he forgot and left her waiting for almost two hours. they- she had booked tickets for a new museum exhibit that she wanted to visit- since the museum closed at 11pm she had gotten tickets for 9pm.

matt wasn't the biggest fan of museums, but he'd do anything for her so he just agreed to go with her. turns out he didn't go along with his words.

10:52pm

y/n was laying in bed reading her current book when she got a call from matt. she was still pretty mad about what had happened, but she picked up anyways. "hello?" she mumbled- closing her book and sitting up against her headboard. "hey, pretty. uhm- is the- is the museum still open?" he said with a slight smile on his face- she could hear his keys jingling in the background. he was most likely coming to pick her up.

she holds back a scoff. "it's about to close in a couple of minutes- i'm going alone next week, it's okay- don't worry about it." she sighs, throwing her comforter off of her. "so- i don't have to pick you up tonight?" he stops in front of his car. "no, matt." he heard the change in her voice.

"baby, are you mad at me? i said i was sorry- i forgot." he speaks, leaning against the drivers side door. "that's- that's the thing, matt. you forgot- we had this planned for weeks! and- and i even mentioned it yesterday when we were together. and you just... forgot?" her voice slightly changed. "it slipped my mind, okay?" matt tried his best to stay clam. he didn't know how to control this- they had never argued before.

yeah they had little disagreements about small things- very small things. but never like this- this felt serious. "if you didn't want to go with me you should've just said, not ignore me and make me wait for hours, knowing you weren't going to come!" matt sighs. "you should've reminded me if you really wanted me to go with you." this alone sets her off. "i should've reminded you? i shouldn't have to do that- if you really wanted to you would!"

"look- i didn't mean to, okay?" he throws his head back against the window- matt was starting to get irritated. "didn't mean to what? forget that we had plans? ditch me for your friends?" a hand ran through her hair, her eyes stung a bit and a knot formed in her throat. "i'm sorry- alright! i didn't think it would piss you off this much!" so he forgot on purpose? her grip on the phone tightened when she connected two and two together.

"not piss me off?! matt- i had bought these tickets so long ago because you said you'd go with me! i know museums aren't your thing, but you promised. do- did it not matter to you?" she whispered the last part. "baby- it's not like that... i- i didn't think. it does matter- i just- you know how i am about museums."

"but, matt. it wasn't just about the museum. it was about us spending time together. i chose the museum because it was a new fun exhibit- i thought you'd like it. we barely saw each other this week- and you're about to leave for a week." tears slowly started rolling down her cheeks. "baby.. i- i get that, but the guys called and i wasn't thinking. i thought we could go another time."

"whatever, matt. i'm going to bed." she scoffs- she had had enough of this- at this point she felt like she was repeating herself. "fine." he muttered- leaning off of his car and heading back to his dorm building. she didn't hesitate to hang up right away.

the next day

y/n woke up, got ready for the day and went downstairs to eat a quick breakfast. she had tried her hardest to forgot about last nights argument. she went about her day, she only had two classes today so it was an easy day. her headphones played her personal playlist, which was weird because she had forgotten certain songs that were in it since she hasn't played it in so long.

she walked into the coffee shop and was next in line. "hello, can i get a medium brown sugar cookie iced coffee, please. and tw- one vanilla scone. and a uhm- medium- sorry, nevermind, that will be all." her cheeks flushed red with embarrassment. it was almost like muscle memory to get matt's order since you two always got iced coffee and a scone together.

heading over to their usual spot and plopped down waiting for her order. she scrolled through her emails and saw that her second and last class had been cancelled. darling thought she'd go check out the bookstore and see any new arrivals.

she opened the door and the bell above the door chimed. "welcome!" the sweet front desk lady said. "hello." darling smiled at her.

darling scanned the bookshelves, but nothing caught her attention, however she was looking to get a new journal to scrapbook. she headed over to the stationery section and saw the many different journals.

as she paid, she felt her phone buzz in her bag. as the woman scanned her journal and a few other miscellaneous items, darling grabbed her phone and saw that matt was calling. "your total is $23.62." the cashier suddenly spoke. out of habit, she double clicked the side button and declined the call to pay.

matt was currently in his dorm room as he had just came back from his second class of the day. he had a two hour break until his next class. in all honesty, he wasn't able to focus on his classes from earlier. matt was busy overthinking about his argument with darling last night. she probably wants to break up with him and never speak to him again, he thought.

he tried to busy himself by cleaning up his side of the dorm room. throwing away a bit of trash here and there. using the mini vacuum, the one darling bought for him and his roommate, to clean up the carpeted floor. and he did his laundry. as he folded his clothes, one of darlings' shirts had gotten into his load.

he gently folded it and put it in her designated drawer she had in his dorm, which was overflowing. he hoped that it stayed that way. as matt finished folding up his laundry, he decided to call her. opening his recent call log, she was the most recent one.

pretty🤍 yesterday 10:52pm

"please pick up." he muttered as he sat on his bed. it went past the first three rings, no answer yet. the call was soon declined. "fuck." he sighed, tossing his phone to the side resulting in it falling in the crack between his bed and his wall. "great."

matt threw himself back on his bed and groaned in frustration. why'd he have to be such an asshole and ditch her for her friends. most importantly- why'd he leave her waiting? the thought of her being ready and excited to go on the date only for him to not show up made him feel even worse than he already did.

matt really wanted to go over and apologize, he looked at the time and saw that around this time she was already home. he wasn't one to stalk her location as often, but he just decided to check. what if he went to her house and she wasn't even home? he pulled up her location and saw that she was at her friends house. he had remembered because he had picked her up from them once. maybe later. he thought.

the night came around and she was still with her friend. not that he was tracking her or anything, but she just happened to post a story on instagram and he just happened to get the notification.

it wasn't until an hour later when he checked her location and she were finally home. matt sat up and jumped off of his bed and grabbed his car keys from his desk. he didn't bother to grab a hoodie or anything, he just wanted to go to her to apologize.

y/n was laying in bed as she had just gotten home from spending most of the day with her best friend. the two of them caught up on everything. she told darling everything about this guy had been seeing and darling told her about her little disagreement with matt. she opened up to her and told her how she thought that maybe matt was getting tired of her because he never ditched her like that. "darling, i promise you that man is so obsessed with you. he is not leaving you anytime soon or ever." is what she told her.

she had her book propped up on her chest as she caught up on reading. that was until she heard little taps on her window. for a split second she thought it was raining, but when she looked over she saw matt out her window. "what?" she said confusingly, closing her book and sitting up. darling walked over to the window and opened it. "matt, what are you doing here? outside my window!" she told him. "i- i wanted to see you. can you sit with me out here? please." she thought for a second, but quickly agreed.

before she said anything, she turned around. matt had for sure thought she had just rejected him, but she soon returned with a hoodie on. "scoot over." darling said softly. for a moment they sat in silence, the occasional breeze blowing the tree branches. the tension was there, but it wasn't so tense. the silence was soon broken as matt spoke.

"m' sorry. i'm really sorry about yesterday." his hand came to her knee. "i- i shouldn't have done that. shouldn't have ditched you for my friends. shouldn't have left you waiting." his thumb moved back and forth against her sweatpants. "i'm sorry for lashing out on you-" matt interrupted her. "hey- no. don't be sorry, pretty. you had every right to be mad. i was the one who stood you up." she pouted, he was so understanding.

"are- are you sure? i feel really bad." darling grabbed his hand and intertwined their fingers together. a gust of wind blew through and a strand of her hair came out of place. matt's empty hand came up to her face and tucked it behind her ear. "forgive me, baby? let me go with you next week, let me make it up to you." he kissed the back of her hand. she nodded.

"of course i forgive you." she smiled at him, taking her hand away from his to bring it up to his face to connect their lips in a sweet kiss. "i love you." darling mumbled against his lips. "i love you." matt smiled against her lips.

the two sat outside her window for a couple of minutes before it started to drizzle. "you stayin' the night?" she picked up her head from his shoulder. "only if you want me to." he grinned at her already knowing the answer. darling giggled and carefully stood up- matt stood up right after and guarded her to prevent anything- "come on." she crawled back into her room. matt closed the window, locking it, and immediately kicked his shoes off.

like routine he picked her up by the waist and gently tossed her onto the bed crawling on top of her. matt cuddled her, giving her little neck and shoulder kisses here and there.

soon enough, they fell asleep with her head tucked in his neck and his hand running through her hair. they weren't going anywhere anytime soon.

[lyricwritesprose]

So I've known Winter since she was a weird little goth egg who borrowed my jewelry, but she's never asked for my expertise as a large animal veterinarian before. Winter doesn't have large animals. Winter has three cats, brothers, named Sauce, High Fructose Corn Syrup, and Bobby. (Bobby is the ginger one.)

So I wasn't sure what was up when she told me to bring my "hoof stuff" and not to tell anyone, but you know, she's my friend. An hour's drive and a little secrecy is nothing.

She met me at the door and escorted me upstairs and into her bedroom, and there was a demon lying on the bed. Red. Horns. Tail. Winter's grandma's quilt over him. Very confused expression.

"He says he hasn't had hoof care for a long time," Winter explained. "Apparently conditions in Pandemonium kind of suck."

Well, that, at least, was straightforward. "Yeah, I'll take a look at them. You owe me an explanation or five."

"Not really much to explain," Winter said apologetically. "I needed help with biochem."

"There are about ten thousand ways that statement does not lead to this situation."

"Oh, come on, like you've never tried to summon a demon to do your homework."

"No, as a matter of fact, I haven't, because that's academic cheating and as a vet, it could be a life or death matter for me to actually know stuff. Also demons aren't—" You can't exactly say demons aren't real with one watching you. "Necessarily any better at biochem than I am. So you tried some spell and—oh. Ouch. Yeah, that's a gnarly looking hoof, you're going to need some treatment on that. Looks like maybe you haven't been walking around much?" That was to the demon. "Because the edges should wear down if you have proper room to move."

"I don't." His voice was softer than I expected. "What are you going to do to me?"

"Hoof trim," I said, "first of all. Have you had anything to eat? Do you need anything to eat?"

"I ordered door dash from the Indian place half an hour ago," Winter said. "Should be any minute. It's the only decent vegetarian place around here and I really don't want to deal with the whole question of which critters are acceptable to eat across cultural differences, so—yeah. See, the problem is, Asgrvanisaghl has been through a lot since some asshole 'higher demon' put his name in a grimoire, which means that we've got to find a way to block summonings as necessary or at least keep him from getting controlled when they happen."

"I don't do magic," I said, laying out my bag of tools, "I do comfortable hooves. Although, you know, you could call in Shawn. He's got that mythology special interest going on."

"I texted him. He can come by tomorrow but he's doing a thing."

I nodded. "You are probably," I told the demon, "going to have to repeat the name you want me to use for you several times before I get it. I'm not great with pronunciation. Right, so hoof trimming tools probably look different where you're from, but the principles should be the same. This is—"

"Why are you doing this?"

I shrugged. "I mean. We're humans."

"But—no. Humans want great wealth, or they want their rivals removed, or they want the love of the most beautiful woman in the land, or they want—other things—"

"Humans are bastards sometimes and they should not have treated you like that."

He didn't seem to know what to do with that statement.

"But the main thing about humans is that we clump up in groups. You wanna guess what group me and Winter were in, in high school?"

He shook his head wordlessly.

"The group of kids that didn't fit in. Queer, autistic, whatever. And believe me I'm going to call in all of us until we can make sure you're safe."

"But. I'm not one of you."

I shrugged again. "You are now."

The demon collapsed onto your bed. A vacant stare in his eye as he uttered “this is the 10,000th time I’ve been summoned. can we make it easy? Please?”

[steveseddie]

apply directly to the forehead

written for @steddieholidaydrabbles | prompt: alone | rating: t | wc: 997 | tags: hurt comfort, steve has migraines, eddie takes care of him, hand holding, forehead kisses read on ao3

No one notices when Steve slips out the front door. No one but Eddie, who tells Jonathan he’s going out for a smoke and follows him.

There are only woods around the Hopper-Byers cabin, and the only light comes from the Christmas lights hanging from the roof so it takes a moment for Eddie’s eyes to adjust to the near darkness. He sees Steve sitting on the steps with his head between his knees and taking slow, deep breaths. 

“Steve?” Eddie speaks softly, trying not to startle him but Steve still flinches. “You okay?” 

“I’m fine,” Steve mumbles, keeping his head down. 

Eddie sits next to him. “Wanna try again? That wasn’t very convincing.”

Steve groans but it’s not his ‘Eddie is being annoying’ groan, it’s a pained groan. 

“‘S just a headache, ‘m fine,” Steve insists but his voice sounds weak. 

“Look at me.” Eddie squeezes his knee. “Stevie, please, look at me.” 

Steve sighs but lifts his head. Eddie can’t help but wince at how he looks. His face is twisted into a grimace, his skin is paper-white and there are tears in his eyes. 

“Oh, Steve. It’s a migraine, isn’t it? A bad one?” He gently brushes some hair off Steve’s face. Steve gives a tiny nod. “When did it start?” 

“A few hours ago,” Steve says with a shuddery breath. “While shopping with Robin, all the lights, the music and the crowds–”

“Why didn’t you say something?” 

Steve shrugs, then winces. “Didn’t want to worry anyone.” 

“Of course not.” That’s why Steve still showed up to the Hopper-Byers Christmas party, knowing there would be loud music and even louder kids, and then forced himself to smile through his pain. Eddie sighs. “C’mon, I’m taking you home.” 

“No, Eds–” Steve protests weakly. “I can drive myself-”

Eddie huffs. “Steve, you can’t even keep your eyes open right now.”

“But the party–”

“–will carry on without us,” Eddie finishes, rolling his eyes. “Wait here, okay?” 

Steve sighs and nods, and Eddie squeezes his knee again before heading back inside. 

He finds Robin and tells her that Steve isn’t feeling well and he’s taking him home. 

“Do you want me to come?” She asks, worried.

“Nah, I got him,” Eddie says. Steve wouldn’t want someone else to leave the party early because of him. “Just tell Hopper I’ll pick up the van tomorrow, okay?” 

“Okay, thanks, Eddie,” she says with a quick hug. 

Outside, Eddie finds Steve leaning against the railing, looking like he’s about to keel over. 

“Alright, big boy. Let’s get you home,” he says, leading them to the Beemer.

“No van?” 

“Nope. You complain about how fucking loud my van is on a good day. Figured you wouldn’t appreciate it today of all days.”

Steve chuckles weakly. “Admit it, you just want an excuse to drive a cool car for once.” 

Eddie scoffs indignantly. “My van is plenty cool, Harrington.” 

“Uh huh.” 

He sticks his tongue out at Steve and starts the car. The drive to his house is quiet. Eddie turns the radio all the way off, Steve keeps his head against the window and his eyes closed, and Eddie tries his best not to jostle the car too much. 

He has to gently shake Steve’s shoulder once they arrive and then he follows him inside. 

He goes straight to his bedroom and collapses on the bed, taking his shoes off but leaving his jeans and his ugly Christmas sweater on. 

Eddie finds some sleeping clothes and tosses them his way. “Take those jeans off, Harrington.”

Steve huffs. “At least buy me dinner first, Munson,” he says, his hands working on his belt buckle. 

Eddie’s cheeks turn pink but with just the moonlight illuminating the room through the curtains, he doubts Steve can see it. “So that’s what it takes to get into Steve Harrington’s pants?”

“Usually,” Steve says, shoving his jeans off before sliding on sweatpants, keeping his movements slow to not make his headache worse. “But for a guy as hot as you, I can make an exception.”

Eddie chokes on his spit. Leave it to Steve to flirt while his head is waging a war against the rest of him.  

After changing out of his Christmas sweater, Steve falls back into bed, burrowing his face into his pillow with a groan. The mattress dips when Eddie sits next to him, his back against the headboard. Steve blinks one eye open. “You don’t have to stay, I’m–”

“-in no condition to be alone right now,” Eddie finishes, rolling his eyes.

“You should go back to the party. I didn’t mean to ruin your night–”

“Steve Harrington called me hot. Nothing could ruin my night after that,” he jokes even if there’s some truth to it. 

Steve groans– this time it is his ‘Eddie is being annoying’ groan. “I’m gonna regret saying that.” 

“Because you didn’t mean it or–”

“Oh, I meant it,” Steve says, rolling to his side and looking up at Eddie through half-lidded eyes that might not have anything to do with his migraine. “But now you can hold it against me.”

“It would be kind of hypocritical of me since I also find you hot,” Eddie says, playing with a rip in his jeans. 

Steve’s fingers find his, intertwining them. “If my head wasn’t about to explode I would suggest we do something about that.”

Eddie’s widen. “Something like–”

“Like kissing. Though I could be persuaded to do other things.”

“Jesus,” Eddie says laughing shakily. “Now my head feels like it might explode.”

“We can talk in the morning,” Steve says, shifting until he finds a comfortable position. 

“Thought you didn’t want me to stay,” Eddie teases.

“Said you didn’t have to stay, Eds. I always want you here.” 

Eddie’s stomach flutters. “Okay,” he says, sliding down until he’s lying next to Steve, their fingers still intertwined. 

“Thanks for taking care of me,” Steve whispers, half asleep already. 

“Anytime, sweetheart,” Eddie says softly, kissing Steve’s forehead. “Anytime.”

[loveandpeaceanddoughnuts]

after hours, a fluffy husband!Nanami oneshot

an: this one goes out to all the babes working through the holidays, in all forms<3

“Working late again, my love?” Nanami wrinkled his brow as he looked over your shoulder at the computer screen. “Is this the same project you’ve been working on all week?”

You rolled your neck, trying to ease some of the tension, and he took it as his cue to begin gently massaging your shoulders. “Yeah, it is,” you sighed. “I tried to tell my boss we should’ve started this months ago, but they ignored it until this week. Now I’ve got to get it all done by an impossible deadline.” You jabbed at the button to lower the brightness on your monitor. Your eyes stung, and it only frustrated you more. “It sucks.”

Nanami kept kneading your shoulders as he listened, softly pressing down when they rose up to your ears as you vented. “That sounds awful. They should have listened to you.”

“Mhm. But it doesn’t matter now, I still have to fix their problem.”

“There’s no one else that can do this? Or at least help?”

“Ha, no one else who can do it right, or on time.” You shrugged his hands off, ignoring the way it made him frown. “I’ll be working late tonight. Don’t stay up waiting for me, okay? Only one of us should have to suffer.”

He hummed dismissively. “I don’t think so. I’m keeping you company, at the very least.” He pressed a kiss to the top of your head. “You know how I feel about overtime.”

“It’s shit?”

“Exactly. I’ll be back in a moment.” 

You slumped in your chair and scrolled through a few more pages of documentation as Nanami clattered around the kitchen. When he reappeared in the doorway, he was holding two mugs of tea, with a book tucked under his arm. Your softest pair of sweatpants were draped over his shoulder. 

“What’s all this, Kento?”

He set the tea at your elbow and held out the sweatpants with a crooked smile. “Trying to help a little.” He knelt down in front of your chair. “Will you let me?”

You nodded and let your head fall back on the chair as he pulled off your trousers, your scowl easing just a bit. Kento’s touch was gentle and warm, chased by light kisses. He slid your comfy sweatpants on, smiling as you lifted your hips to let him work them up to your waist. “There we go. Better?”

“Much,” you conceded. He lifted your bare foot and pressed a kiss to the arch, like Prince Charming doting on Cinderella. But instead of a glass slipper, he adorned you in fuzzy socks.

Nanami didn’t give you a chance to protest as he pulled a chair up beside you and settled in, one hand resting firmly on your thigh. “We’ll see this through together, alright?” He opened the book he had brought in and began to read. 

His silent support made the work go faster. Though it was a miserable slog, leaning your head on his shoulder or feeling his hand in your hair reminded you that there were better things waiting for you when the work was done.

True to his word, Nanami stayed up as late as you did, microwaving your tea, massaging your aching shoulders, and murmuring words of encouragement until your monster of an assignment was vanquished. You sent your last email and slammed the laptop shut with a triumphant grin, and he scooped you up in his arms. "You're incredible. My wife, the genius. My brilliant- what is it you say?" he stopped to think for a moment. "Corporate baddie."

You burst into a fit of laughter. "Where are you taking me?"

"To a well-earned rest, my love." You smiled into his chest, feeling a familiar heat between your legs, his sweetness and strong embrace making you want to feel the rest of your him, to reward him for his patience...

Despite your grand plans, you were half-asleep by the time he reached the bedroom. He laid you gently in bed and set to work wiping the makeup from your face with a reusable cloth- he wasn't new at this. "This" being taking care of you- by far the most important responsibility in his mind.

He accepted the half-asleep kisses you pressed to his lips between mumbled promises of what you'd do to him tomorrow, in thanks.

"As lovely as it sounds, at least I think," he teased, "I don't need to be rewarded for caring for you. I seem to remember saying some vows to that effect..."

You shushed him with another kiss, already drifting off beside him. Exactly where you belonged.

[azrielslightintheshadows]

Scattered Vows (part 2)

Azriel x f!Reader

Warnings; angst, torture, death Part 1

Masterlist

“Are you sure he is ready to start going on missions again?” Feyre asked Rhys her brows furrowed in worry.

“I don’t know… it’s been a year and he is way better than I thought he would be. I didn’t think he would survive it.” Rhys responded and rubbed his jaw.

Feyre sighed and nodded  “I hope we aren’t wrong”

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

“Wow she did an excellent job” Eris gaped at your new face.

“I know” you exclaimed and stared at the foreign face who stared back at you in the mirror.

Eris straightened “Are you sure you want to do this? If you don’t want to its okay I can send someone else”

Were you sure? When Eris asked you to become a spy in the night court you thought that it was the most absurd request but after some more thought it made sense. You knew Velaris like the back of your hand, you grew up there. The guilt you felt when you accepted the offered mission was soon replaced with hatred. They betrayed you; they thought that Elain should replace you. Their tearful eyes when you and Azriel exchanged vows felt like snakes slithering your way now. How could they claim that they loved you when they were preparing your betrayal? How could they smile at you when they were covering your mate’s affair? I’m alone now. I always knew that Eris needed something from me when he so eagerly accepted me in his court and its only fair to give it to him now.

“I will do it. I have nothing to lose anymore” you stated, the words leaving a bitter taste in your mouth. Could you really do this? Look at the eyes of your family and then dig a knife in their backs? Look at the eyes of your mate while reporting back to the enemy? Could you watch him with Elain without breaking down?

The new appearance the witch of the Autumn court gave you brought you some comfort, they wouldn’t know that it is you the one who spies on them if they caught you.

When the sun set and the stars claimed the sky you gathered your things and left your new home.  

Velaris…. A sight for sore eyes. Your heart almost jumped out of your chest as you watched the busy streets of the city you once called your home.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Azriel laid the flowers over the beautiful stone he had made when he was able to think clearly again. Every morning he visited his mate’s grave. Every morning he brought her flowers. Every night he came back with more flowers. It gave him comfort; it felt like he said good morning and goodnight every day like he used to do when she was alive. No matter how far away he was, every morning he would tag the golden thread of the bond and he would smile when he would feel her tagging it back more fiercely. Every night he would do it again and the smile would come back when she would respond.

He grabbed his hair and pulled, his shadows rushing to calm him down. He wanted to scream, to tear himself apart. “Stop” he shouted to his shadows when they tried to slither between his scarred hands and his hair. How odd, a few months ago his shadows would only hiss at him and try to strangle him for what he did to their favorite creature and now they are trying to stop him from hurting himself.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

You tried to keep your breathing as quiet as you could when you reached the small cottage you and your mate created. The sight in front of you making your heart skip a beat. There he was, kneeling in front of a grave, your grave. His hands pulling his hair and his shoulders shaking with every sob. You couldn’t move. No if you moved his shadows would sense it and there goes your mission. You closed your eyes wanting to erase the heart wrecking scene in front of you. Why? Why is he mourning you?

After a few hours of crying he flew away. He is probably going back to the house of wind. Back in his bed with her…  You thought and entered the small cottage. Everything was exactly how you left it. Broken dishes and glasses from the days you spent breaking down on the kitchen floor. He obviously came here since the few things he left the day he broke your heart were gone now. Only your things were around except the dress you wore the day you exchanged your vows. That and your favorite sweatshirt well his sweatshirt that you stole and wore whenever he was away on a mission. Maybe he gave it to Elain. You thought and shook your head. You didn’t want to imagine anything else, like him keeping it because it smelled like you now, because that thought would make you fail your mission. You knew that the guilt would eat you up if you allowed yourself to forgive them. So you left the cottage and found shelter in an abandoned house you used to play hide and seek when you were younger with your friends.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

The next few days were pretty easy, Azriel was gone on missions so you could spy easily. Every morning you would winnow to the roof of the house of wind and afterwards you would hide in the shadows of the house. You watched everyone living their life without a mention of your name. You wanted to scoff every time they talked about Azriel like he was the one betrayed. You could barely control yourself every time you heard Elain worrying about him and cursing your name for leaving him. Like it was you fault that he chose her over you. You imagined how many times he held her while you waited back home with two dishes in front of you, picking up the pieces of your heart and trying to glue them back together.

You watched as the dining table filled with food and everyone took a seat. You stayed hidden and planned to leave when they finished their dinner so you could write back to Eris about the plans to enhance the security of Velaris. Familiar sound of beating wings filled the house and you felt your blood freezing. He is back.

Your eyes scanned the corridor trying to find a way to leave unnoticed before the shadows who hid you betrayed you to their master. Your hands started shaking and breathing became a struggle as he landed inside. A small shadow crawled up his body and when it reached his ear his eyes scanned the room quickly before landing on the darkness engulfing you. A bile rose to your throat, and you swallowed the acid down. In a blink his hand was around your neck, your feet leaving the ground as he carried you in the room by the neck like a filthy ragdoll.

“What is that?” Rhys growled and rose from his seat.

“I don’t know but I will find out soon enough” Azriel said, and you shivered, how you missed his voice.

In an instant the world became black.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

You blinked and suddenly you were in a cell. Rhys probably put you to sleep before they carried you here. You knew that cell very well, the cell used by the infamous shadowsinger of the night court. The cell where he broke every enemy and stripped them of their dignity. You heard his heavy footsteps and wondered for a moment if the disguise was a wise decision. He appeared in front of you, his eyes examining every detail of your face like it was familiar. Its me my love. You thought but Elain’s image in your mind made you clench your fists and scrunch your nose in disgust. The chains that kept you on the chair rattled with your heavy breathing and Azriel studied your whole body before he shook his head and grabbed truth teller. He came over you and your screams filled the silence as he begun working.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Drip, drip, drip

You stared as your blood made a puddle under your chair. One eye gone, broken ribs, broken fingers, broken hands and knees. A filthy, used, broken ragdoll but you never said a word, the ward around you never failed and Azriel was furious he couldn’t break you. You knew his patience was running thin, you knew what was coming, you knew him better than yourself. So when the door of the cell opened and he walked back inside with a feral look you smiled. It will be over soon.

“One last chance, tell me who sent you and I will let you go” he said through gritted teeth.

You kept your smile as you shook your head.

“Okay then” he said and punched you.

Broken nose you added to your mental list. He stared deep in your eyes as he grabbed a sword hanging from the wall next to him. A tear slipped from your eye as the sword entered your chest and exited through your back. You felt the wards failing and your face transforming back to your own. Azriel’s eyes widened, and he took a step back. More tears spilled and with a shaky breath you said “That’s a more fitting way to die than an arrow.”

Azriel’s body started shaking as your eye stared aimlessly at him and your chest stopped moving with your breathing.

“No this can’t be…. No no no” he screamed and grabbed your shoulders shaking you.  He ran outside and flew to the small cottage where he started digging. Nothing. Not even an empty coffin, nothing.

“No no no no” he kept repeating while hitting his head.

He flew back to the cell and was met with a tense Rhysand.

“Tell me this is some sick joke” Azriel whispered and the high lord shook his head as tears started streaming down his face.

“She was at the Autumn court. She asked Feyre to hide her and tell you she died.” Rhys admitted through a sob.

Azriel’s eyes narrowed.

“Leave” he shouted

“Az…”

“I said fucking leave” he screamed as his shadows rose like a wave and poured all over Velaris making the citizens stare at the sky in confusion.

He spent hours cuddling your cold broken body. Thinking every torture he made you endure, beating himself for not realizing it was you even though he felt something familiar when he touched you or studied your face.

Hatred. Anger. Rage. Betrayal.

That’s what he felt as he held you close and cried out loud. He knew that his cries could be heard all over Velaris. They betrayed him. They let him hurt you and then helped you run away. They lied to him. Feyre lied to him. If she hadn’t brought her sisters here you would be alive by his side. That’s what he had to do before he joined you. He had to burn their world.

He held you in his arms as he flew back to the cottage. He placed you on your bed and with a kiss on your forehead as a silent promise he left in a hurry. His eyes red and filled with tears, his hair disheveled and covered in your blood. Revenge written all over his face as he watched them all hanging out in Elain’s garden. Rhysand looking horrified as he watched Azriel descend from the sky. In an instant the shadowsinger was in the middle of them.

“Look what you made me become” he screamed “Its your fault” he pointed at Feyre.

The high lord stepped in front of her. Azriel shook his head. “This time none of you will be able to hurt me and my mate” he declared and shot to the sky while the house behind them burst into flames.

Azriel entered the cottage feeling a wave of relief and calmness. He lied next to you and closed his eyes before dropping a small candle he held in his hands on the ends of the curtains and as the flames licked the walls he kissed your cold and dry lips and smiled.

I'm back but after this I feel like you won't be happy with my return :') Credits to my best friend who helped me write it! She doesn't have a tumblr account to tag her though.

@littlest-w01f , @wallacewillow0773638 , @justdreamstars, @going-through-shit , @stargirl1714 , @steadypaperhideout , @fxckmiup , @bigcreatorwombatdreamer ,

[spiderb00]

CINDY LOU WHO

Daniela Avanzini X Reader 

“You didn't think about the consequences of your actions, and consequently, you didn't think about how Daniela's heart would be after all this” 

Genre – angst as fuck Warnings – Reader is an asshole 

fruitcake masterlist

Now playing – Cindy lou who, by Sabrina Carpenter 

Daniela was paralyzed, sitting on a bench in the park with her phone in her hand. The phone screen displayed a photo, which a news Instagram had posted, the image was clear, probably taken by a professional camera of some photographer. The first photo showed you and your ex Jenna Ortega, walking hand in hand on the streets of New York, laughing at something very funny, and for a moment, Daniela was afraid to scroll to the next photo.   

Taking a deep breath, the Latina ran her finger over the screen, her breath getting caught in her ribcage and her world slowly collapsing. You and Jenna, kissing, near the various Christmas decorations, which were now making Daniela nauseous. Tears began to well up in the blonde's eyes, and she wanted to throw her phone into the water fountain that was in front of her.   

A month ago, you and Daniela had fallen apart. No matter how hard the Latina tried, she thought she would never make you happy like your ex, but that didn't stop her from trying.   

"Where are you going?" Daniela asked, holding the sheet on her chest, leaning on her elbow and looking at you wearing your clothes. 

"I'm going home, I mean, your friends are coming and I have to work tomorrow." You said, buttoning your pants and sitting on the bed to tie the shoelaces of your sneakers.  

With a slightly worried look, Daniela sat down lightly, crawling to the corner of the bed where you were sitting, letting the sheet fall the Latina hugged your waist, putting her chin on your shoulder.   

"You don't have to go, Manon is at her girlfriend's house, and the girls don't mind having you here. I don't have work tomorrow, you can stay and I can make you breakfast." Daniela said, starting to get excited about the idea of you spending the night.   

"Dani, don't make this what it isn't." You said, letting go of the younger woman's grip and getting up to get your jacket. "You know this is not a relationship."  

 "What? Is it bad that I want to do something for you?" Daniela replies, you could tell she was about to cry with your words.  

"You already do enough." You said, still without looking at her.  

"Oh yes. I let you fuck me, sure, how did I not think of that before?" Daniela said, her cutting voice dripping with sarcasm. "You know what, it was a mistake to call you tonight." The Latina stood up, wearing the clothes you had taken off a few hours ago. 

"What's wrong with you? We both agreed that this would be just casual sex." You said, approaching Daniela, only for the shorter woman to move away from you.   

"No, you decided that on your own. You know what, you can come to me when you want to stop using me." Daniela said, throwing your car keys on your chest, walking towards the bedroom door and opening for you, a silent request to leave her alone.  

With a snort, you shook your head negatively, staring incredulously at the Latina in front of you, before passing her and heading away. 

Daniela didn't know what she had done wrong, she didn't know why you loved Jenna, why you went public with Jenna, why you had a relationship with Jenna, while you hadn't done any of that with her. The Latina felt lost, the red and green lights were now all blue, just like her.   

After the incident, you and Daniela had exchanged some messages, she had fallen again, asking you to come to her house and forget about all that fight. She didn't care if you weren't going to stay afterwards, she just wanted to feel your warmth one last time. She remembered the messages, it all seemed so vivid in her mind.   

You refused to go to her that night, you said you were discovering yourself, searching for your soul, going after your way, you told her you were getting lost in Los Angeles. Now she understands why you were so happy, you found yourself.   

Looking at the photo once again made Daniela want to throw up, the Latina's stomach churning in a bad way, and she thought it best to lock her phone screen before she had a public crisis. Feeling a hand on her shoulder, the Latina looked over her shoulder, seeing Sophia's hand and the rest of the Kats standing behind her with looks of compassion. And when the tears began to run down her eyes, Daniela thought it best to get up and go to the car.  

"'is the season, i guess." 

That's kind of small because I hate writing angst, but I found it interesting.

I think this is my first fic that doesn't have a happy ending. I'm sad for Daniela, but the requests I have for her are very cute, so they will make up for it.

xoxo, spider.

[philistiniphagottini]

Passion Flower and Rice Milk

A/N: Thank you to everyone who read the first chapter and reblogged it with nice tags and/or left nice comments. I really, really appreciate the support you have shown this story. I'm very happy and thrilled to keep posting chapters. Comments and reblogs would be very greatly appreciated if you wanna see more ^-^ Thanks again for reading, hope you enjoy

Summary: It's been two weeks since you've seen Dan Feng. And, you get an unexpected visitor in your garden.

cw. mutual pining, friends to lovers, a/b/o inspired but not an omegaverse, adult themes, female reader, chubby reader, vidyadhara reader, minors DO NOT interact

Previous Chapter

Chapter 2

It had been two weeks since you had seen Dan Feng. The last thing you remember was fleeing his garden in such a hurry you almost tripped over your own feet. You felt awful for the way you had abruptly departed, the memories replaying over and over in your head, taunting you into the late hours of the evening. It made you feel sick. You had been on the cusp of telling Dan Feng what was wrong, it was your intention on that day to spill everything. But you got scared. You were terrified to take a risk out of fear of his rejection. And so, for the past two weeks you hid like a coward and hoped to weather this unrelenting storm by yourself. Like you had always done, like the elders of your clan told you to do. It was just simpler to take your medicine, to suppress your natural urges, no matter how much it would cause you to suffer in the end, and not be a burden to others. Act like you were expected to act, the way you were taught and conditioned. And like the dumb, little girl that still craved the love and attention from neglectful parents, you obliged hoping to gain even a shred of approval.

You have been miserable without Dan Feng’s company. You refused to go see him. You were forbidden to leave. You sulked around your quarters and your estate. Your thoughts were a mess. Your emotions weren’t faring any better either. The maids and servants of the estate were ordered to stay out of your way but to remain vigilant and keep an eye on you. Not by your words. Your clan's elders. Every time you thought of them you could taste something horrible and acidic on the back of your tongue. You were moody. Your stomach hurt. Your feet ached. You were uncomfortable in your regular attire, the fabric sticking awkwardly to your skin as your back dotted with beads of sweat. You turned your nose up in the air at the sticky grossness. You tried to tend to the flowers in your garden, hoping the sweet scent of perfume would help clear your head and keep you occupied. It didn’t work. The smell you usually loved made you feel nauseous and burned every time you took a ragged breath. 

It was only midday, but you were about to pack it in for the day. You had been getting terrible sleep at night anyway and you had resorted to napping during the day to make up for it. You couldn’t tell if the rumble in your stomach was because you hadn’t eaten or because the thought of food was too taxing. You stood from your kneeling position next to your flower bed, brushing off the dirt from your robes as your hair softly fluttered in the breeze. The cool wind was a small comfort against your heated, golden scales, your tail swishing elegantly from side to side as the fur fluffed up in the breeze. The soft, silk shawl wrapped around your shoulders slipped when you fussed and you coiled it tighter around your neck so you wouldn't lose it. It was a gift, from Dan Feng. He had presented it to you only a few moons ago, wrapping the fine silk around your shoulders to warm you from the chill, night air. You had graciously accepted, the commodity of receiving a heartfelt gift a rare occasion that brightened your smile. Every time you pinched the fabric between the tips of your fingers and pressed it to your nose, you could still smell him. The scent was soothing and it was the only thing keeping you sane, even though it inevitably reminded you of what happened. 

You shook your head to dispel the thoughts before they could consume you again. A sigh escaped your lips as you gathered your gardening tools and you were intent on putting them away. Until you heard someone saying your name and you almost dropped the bucket you had been carrying.

Your eyes widened in surprise and you whipped your head to the source of the voice, your jaw dropping sharply when you spotted who was waving at you from the fence line. Bright eyes of golden honey peeked up at you from a wild mane of snow-white hair, accompanied by a wide grin and a wave of a hand. 

"Jing Yuan" you said. "What are you-?"

The tone of your voice dropped into a hushed whisper as you quickly looked around, making sure that no one had stumbled upon you yet as the young Jing Yuan clambered over the fence. You pressed your finger to your lips when the sound of his shoes hitting the gravel grated against your ears. He noticed the panicked look on your face and stopped in his tracks, hands raised in the air as a sign of peace. When you were sure the coast was clear, you quickly rushed over to him, a concerned look in your eyes as you examined the boy from head to toe. The fur on your tail bristled from your uninvited guest. The elders didn’t like unexpected visitors to the complex and you didn’t know if they would make an expectation for one of Jingliu's students. 

“What are you doing here?” you asked, your tone rushed with a hushed, sharp rasp.

Jing Yuan gave you a beaming smile, his innocence radiating off of his kind face as he looked up at you with big eyes. 

"I came to see you" he replied. "We haven’t played in ages. Are you sick?"

You sighed softly, taking a deep breath to compose yourself. You had to remind yourself that Jing Yuan was still just a kid. A cloud knight cadet but still just a kid. Of course he wouldn’t understand why he hadn’t seen you for the past two weeks. You couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at your lips as he continued to chirp like an excited bird. You could have sworn that he got a little bit taller since the last time you saw him but that may just have been your imagination. You were fond of little Jing Yuan but that didn’t excuse that he was an uninvited visitor. He was breaking the rules by being here and you tried to explain it to him as gently as possible. You stepped towards him, hands coming to rest on his shoulders as he peered up at you beneath the flutter of his pale lashes. No, it wasn’t your imagination. He was a little taller.

"Listen, Jing Yuan, while I appreciate your visit, you’re not supposed to be here" you spoke carefully, your voice soft and full of warmth.

A small pout tugged on Jing Yuan’s lips. "Eh? Why not?"

"The elders do not like it when visitors show up unannounced" you explained, telling a partial truth. 

Jing Yuan’s brow furrowed. "That’s lame. This is your house. You should be able to have over whoever you want."

You couldn’t help but giggle at his response. You wish you could see things through his eyes with such rose-tinted glasses. He was unaware of the complex world adults had to live in and it would be a futile attempt to try and explain why things were this way. Because you anticipated a rebuttal with every statement you made. 

"Are you sick?" Jing Yuan asked again. 

Another long sigh breezed past your lips as your smile fell. You tried to fix it back into place, but it slipped shortly after when you responded to him. 

"Yes and no. It's complicated little Yuan" you replied, again, telling a partial truth.

Jing Yuan’s frown only deepened. You knew that your complexion was sickly, heavy bags under your eyes and the collar of your robes tugged high over your neck that it threatened to creep over your jawline. You looked wrapped up and ready for bed, your tail hanging low and the usual shimmer of your horns dulled under the sunlight. Jing Yuan looked thoughtful for a moment as he reached up and grabbed your hands slowly, carefully gauging your reaction. You blinked owlishly at your intertwined hands, head tilted to the side curiously. A smile lit up his features and he started to tug you in the direction of the back gate. 

"Come on, let’s go for a walk."

Your brow furrowed in confusion, yet you weren’t resisting his pull as you quietly trudged behind him. 

"Why?" you questioned. 

"Because a walk is good for your health!" Jing Yuan exclaimed before you hurriedly shushed him for raising his voice.

He apologised before continuing in a quieter tone. "Master Jingliu always tells me to "walk it off" when I’m not feeling good. So, we should walk it off too. I promise, it’ll make you feel better."

When you had both reached the gate, you finally stopped in your tracks. You paused to think about what you were going to do next. Was this really the right thing to do? Being cooped up in your house wasn’t doing you any favours, but you didn’t want to go against your elder’s words. You teetered on a decision, reminding you of how you flickered between a decision back in Dan Feng’s garden. You could still feel the balmy breeze from that day and the look in his eyes when you told him you were leaving. It tugged at your heart strings. Just as Jing Yuan was tugging at your sleeves now, looking up at you with such a kind face that you couldn’t say no to. Maybe this was your hazy addled brain thinking or perhaps it was finally your breaking point of having other people telling you what to do and planning out your life for you. Whatever it was, this was the second time you would be going against your elder’s wishes and the taste that lingered in your throat as you happily followed along after Jing Yuan tasted sweet. 

Only for it to turn into bitter, rotten fruit when you found out where your destination was. You didn’t pay enough attention as Jing Yuan trotted alongside you, chatting away as you walked side by side. You were too engrossed in all the stories he had to tell you since he last saw you. He talked of the train Jingliu had been putting him through. He talked about what new masterpieces Yingxing had crafted in the forge. He regaled you with tales of the mischief he and Beiheng got into. And lastly, he informed you of Dan Feng and how he seemed like he had more of a stick up his arse than usual. Jing Yuan’s words, not yours. Though you reprimanded him for his use of language, his words made you concerned. But before you could ask for any further clarification, it seemed you had arrived at where Jing Yuan had been leading you. 

A big smile stretched his lips as he waved to the figure standing at the water’s edge, seam foam licking at the edges of his boots as he turned to greet you both. Your stomach dropped so far you thought it was going to shrivel up and die when you realised who it was.

"Dan Feng!" Jing Yuan exclaimed. "I brought her!"

[katsskzverse]

warnings:light smut, cursing -> Felix x reader

Felix was still playing with his video game, he had promised to get off 30 minutes ago. ''Felixie'' you called him, no answer ''baby'' you tried again, still focused on his game, you rolled your eyes ''Felix for fucks sake'' you raised your voice snd he finally turned to face you ''are you talking to me dear'' he said with his deep voice, fuck its hard to stay mad at him. You walked over to him ''when are you done?'' you asked. once more ''in 5 minutes baby'' he answered ''Felix you've been saying that for almost an hour'' you whined.

Your patiance was already gone, its been so long and all you want is to be next to him, hug him, ''come on dear sit on my lap while I play'' he suggested and you agreed of course. While you were sitting on his lap you kissed his neck ''honey what are you doing'' he groans quietly, you smirk against his skin and continue ''whats wrong Felixie?'' you teased, you loved teasing him and then pretending like nothing id happening.

This has been going on for a few minutes now, you could feel his boner under the clothes which only made your core so wet. You kept rubbing your core against his boner, his breath quickening, ''fuck'' he moaned, you moaned back and the stopped, he looked at you with a confused look ''w-what?'' he questioned as I got up and laid on our shared bed again ''thats what you get for ignoring me'' you blew a kiss to him and laid down, you heard him groan and beg for you.

God, its hard to resist.

[cherryblessing]

📎— 04:44 AM WITH SUGURU.

``even under the gentle moonlight, the weight of unspoken regrets lingers,

a reminder that love doesn't erase the scars—it only makes them ache softer.``

The moonlight spilled through the window, soft and silver, pooling across the floor in restless waves. Suguru sat on the edge of the bed, his back turned to you, his figure drawn sharp and clean against the pale glow. His hair fell loose over his shoulders, shadowing his face. He hadn't moved in what felt like hours, a statue carved by the weight of his thoughts.

You stirred, the rustling of the sheets breaking the fragile silence of the room. He didn’t turn, but you felt the way his attention flickered, as if he’d been caught in a moment he didn’t want to share.

“The moon’s beautiful tonight,” he finally spoke, his voice a low murmur, the kind meant more for himself than for anyone else.

You didn’t reply, though you watched him carefully. There was something heavy in his posture, a kind of weariness you couldn’t quite reach, no matter how many times you’d tried before.

He sighed, his fingers curling against his knees. “You should be sleeping.”

You didn’t miss the faint tremor in his voice, the way it wavered like a thread pulled too taut.

But how could you sleep when he was like this? When the silence around him wasn’t restful but suffocating?

Suguru’s mind churned like a storm, thoughts crashing into each other, leaving him stranded in his own bitterness. He should have sent you away a long time ago. Should have let you go before you’d gotten so entangled in the mess that was his life.

The way you smiled at him, the way your touch was so gentle—it only made the gnawing guilt worse. How could you look at him like that, as if he hadn’t already destroyed every good thing he once stood for? As if he weren’t someone who dragged blood and darkness wherever he went?

He clenched his jaw, his nails digging into his palms. He didn’t regret his cause. He’d chosen his path and would see it through to the end. But you… You were a different matter entirely.

You didn’t belong in the shadow with someone like him.

His mind drifted, unbidden, to memories of you—your laughter, the way your hand would brush against his when you thought he wasn’t paying attention. The way you looked at him, unafraid of what he’d become. It made his chest tighten, a dull ache that spread with every thought.

What was he doing, letting you stay? Letting you share his space, his time, his life? It was selfish, wasn’t it? Keeping you here when he knew he could never give you the kind of peace you deserved.

Suguru’s breath hitched. He wasn’t stupid. He saw the way you worried over him, the way you tried to shoulder his silences. You didn’t say it, but he could feel the questions lingering in the air between you, unspoken and patient.

Why does he keep pulling away?

Why won't he let you in?

He wished he could answer, but how could he explain something that didn’t even make sense to himself? That keeping you close was both his salvation and his punishment. That you were a reminder of everything good he’d once been, and everything he’d never be again.

Suguru exhaled shakily, his hands loosening as he let them fall to his sides. The moonlight softened the edges of the room, but it couldn’t soften the weight on his chest.

Behind him, the bed shifted as you moved closer. He felt your presence at his back, warm and steady, and it only made the ache worse.

You didn’t say anything. You never did when he was like this. But your hand brushed his shoulder, lingering just long enough for him to feel the warmth of it.

For a moment, he closed his eyes, leaning into the touch. His lips parted, words hovering on the edge of being spoken. He wanted to tell you, wanted to push you away and pull you closer all at once.

Instead, he whispered, barely loud enough for you to hear, “I don’t deserve you.”

You didn’t pull away. You didn’t answer. You just stayed there, your presence a quiet, unwavering thing that anchored him in the storm of his own making.

And for tonight, that was enough.

all writing, including poems are my own.

©cherryblessing.2024

[megs-1800]

Forever & Always

Summary: You and Mason have been broken up for 6 months. When you rekindle at a party, can you put your past behind you and can you overcome all the obstacles in the way?

Pairing: Mason Mount x Reader

Word Count: 7.5k

Warnings: Fluff, Angst, Swearing and Smut

I walk through my door and let the exhaustion hit me,  its been a week of hell at work and I am finally done for the weekend. I drag my feet through the hallway, and collapse as soon as I reach my bed. Hating myself for not leaving the heating on as its now ice throughout the flat on this winters night.

I tap my phone and see the time, its 9pm. I cannot believe I am getting home from work at this time. I was suppose to finish 4 hours ago but as usual everything is left to me. I haven’t even eaten dinner, I haven’t eaten all day at that. I fight with my head whether I want to make dinner or if I want to sleep. I finally agree that sleep it is, I force myself to get ready for bed as I insist on not sleeping with my makeup on. As I crawl into bed and put Netflix on, I can feel myself start to drift off that’s when my phone bings. As I tap the screen I see the text message from Paige “ Hiya Babes, I will pick you up from the train station at 11am. I cannot wait to see you!!!! I cannot wait to celebrate my birthday with you xx”. There goes my lie in, I thought, its like a 3 hour train journey to get to Manchester so nice early start for me, but quickly reply explaining that I cannot wait to see her too.

Paige is dating some kind of famous DJ, I met her at a party a couple of years ago. Her boyfriend Jason is close with the England squad so Mason always got invited to his events and parties. When Mason and I moved to Manchester, I got really close with Paige. Even since I moved back home after me and Mason broke up she was my biggest support and always stayed in touch. Due to this I agreed to come stay the weekend down at Manchester for her birthday. She is having a big birthday party that Jason is arranging. I just got to figure out how I am going to see Mason again.

We broke up 6 months ago, it absolutely shattered me. We had been dating for little over 2 years, it was a silly fight. We should of never broken up but both of us could not admit we were wrong. Mason let the stress of United get to him, and with all the injuries. I did my best to support him but he became massively distant. Due to my job, I wanted to separate my life with Mason, so people close to us knew about us but the media never knew. He always ensured to take photos of me with my face hidden. That’s when the media released that photo of Mason hugging some bird outside a nightclub. He always denied it, but where he was so distant I really thought it could be true. We had a massive argument about this and that’s when Mason accused me of cheating with one my colleagues that I had gotten close to. I tried to assure him I only wanted him and nothing more but I guess we just didn’t trust eachother. I can feel the tears in my eyes remembering that night, we both were screaming at eachother.

The next thing I know I am being woken up to my alarm, I quickly shower and get ready to leave. I can feel the cold air hit me as I walk out the train station. I quickly spot Paige standing next to her car waving at me. “y/n over here” I hear her shout, I quickly jog over to her and wrap her up. “Omg babes I have missed you so much. So tell me y/n/n whats new?”. I put my bags in the back and get in her car and we have a catch up. We go out for brunch and do a little shopping before her party. I found this dress whilst we were out, it was a tight black dress that stopped just below the bum. It was covered in lace which gave it a little detail, I never normally wear a dress like this but I wanted to impress tonight. As I walk out the changing room I can see Paige eyeing me up and down, “oh yasss y/n/n you gotta get that! You look fit as fuck. No one is going to be able to keep their hands or eyes off you.” I giggle at her reply, “well I do not want to outstage the birthday girl”. Paige shoots me a smile and rolls her eyes “as if anyone is going to ever outstage me” she laughs, I always loved her confidence.

We get ready, I pair my new black dress with a pair of red bottoms louis Vuitton’s that Mason got me when we first got together. I curled my hair and put on subtle make up. I never wore too much. Paige had a gold strappy maxi dress on covered in glitter, she had her hair curled also, she looked breathtaking. That’s when her boyfriend Jason walked through the door and stopped when he saw Paige “Damn look at you girl!!!!” and gives her a kiss. He then turns to me “you look lovely too y/n, thank you for coming” I give him a smile and thanked him for inviting me.

We turn up to the venue and people start filtering in, I feel very out of place as most of these women are famous or dating someone famous so they all look incredible. I quickly see one of Paige’s friend Jade who was her childhood friend which I get on well with so I quickly stand next to her and have drinks with her. I am scanning the room watching everyone coming, its nice to see Paige having such a good time. My eyes quickly stopped when I saw him, no he cannot be here. I cannot believe Mason is here. We quickly catch eyes and I now wish I could read minds, I am wondering what he is thinking?

Mason’s POV

I didn’t want to do go out, I have struggled to be social ever since me and y/n broke up, I do not know why I let my ego get in the way. I was just struggling with the move to Manchester and all the hate I was getting so I took it out on you. We were just constantly arguing, I never wanted to break up I just wanted the arguments to stop.

I am glad I came, it looks lively and good vibes throughout. Its Jason’s girlfriend Paige’s birthday and we all know Jason could throw a party. I am jamming with Dec and a couple of the other guys from the England squad. A lot of them came on their own without their girlfriends. Probably trying to pull I think I don’t get how they can have a perfect women at home and still trying to pull more. I could never of done that, I was always loyal. Me and y/n kept our relationship quiet as didn’t want the press to talk, I was trying to protect her in that way. But I would never even think of getting with another women, in my eyes y/n was always perfect. That’s what hurt me about that argument, we had a fight before I went out to the club you were feeling insecure and wanted me to stay home. Now all I wish is I stayed home, but I met Rachel in the club she was an agent of one the guys that I played with, nothing happened and we were just chatting about my move to Manchester. I went to walk her to her taxi and hugged her goodbye. I know it looked bad but nothing happened, I could swear on that.

My mind is taken out of my day dreaming as Dec is asking me questions trying to engage me in the conversation. I am laughing away trying my hardest to put myself into the conversation, that’s when I see her. My eyes meet her, I can feel my heart beating erratically. This cannot be real, am I imagining this?. That’s when you smile and put your head down and walk away towards the bar. I cannot believe you are here. I knew you are Paige were close when you were in Manchester but I wasn’t sure if you would stay in touch.

I keep watching you the whole night, I feel like a stalker. I can see peoples eyes on you too, I cannot blame them you look out of this world. The dress compliments your body perfectly and the way your hair curls around your face. Damn makes me realise what I have lost. I wonder if you have moved on? I wonder if you have slept with anyone since? I know I have slept with a couple of girls but that was just me trying rebound to get over you, but the thought of someone else being intimate like that with you makes me feel physically sick.

Dec turns my attention back to him “why don’t you just go talk to her instead of staring at her all night its getting creepy?”. I laugh at his comment, “I don’t even know what to say Dec, she looks so beautiful I don’t even know what to say”. I can see the pity in his eyes “Well maybe go over there and be like y/n I love youuuu so much and haven’t stopped talking about it since we broke uppppp so I think we should just start dating again”. Dec joked I laughed and rolled my eyes but I am really not in the mood for joking.  

With that I make my way over the bar, I can feel my heart beating in my chest which is getting faster the closer I get to you. You spot me and follow me with your eyes as I walk upto you. You look down all shy, but I can see the small smile creepy over your face. “What can I get you? The usual?” I offered trying to break the ice. “Sounds good thank you”.

I quickly wave the bartender over and order you a double vodka and lemonade and got myself the same, you quickly made a comment about it being a double but I hoped the alcohol will calm the nerves. You so amazing I do not know what to say. I am about to open my mouth to see if you wanna go somewhere a little more quiet to chat when this guy approaches.

He snakes an arm around your waist that makes you jump but I see you settled into his arms, obviously recognising who he is. He then looks at me, he was a colleague of yours, when we had our big fight when you accused me of cheating with that Rachel, I accused you of cheating with him. I knew he had a massive crush on you it was obvious by the way he spoke to you. What was he doing here?

“See I told you I would make it baby” he turns you around so you are facing him completely ignoring me. “Damn look at you! You look fucking sexy! I cannot wait to undress you later”.  He quickly pulls you in for a deep passionate kiss. I can see you pushing him away, you have never had a problem with PTA with me, you always loved me kissing and hugging you so I am assuming you are just not comfortable with the situation. I am not really impressed with his comment, yes I agree you look bloody incredible but I hate hearing others say that, it doesn’t sound right.

I am in shock, you are here with the guy you told me not to worry about. Did you cheat? Was I right. I quickly walked away from the situation, I cannot let myself get hurt again. It killed me when we broke up I cannot go through that again. I shoot you a smile, and I think I hear you say thank you for the drink but it was inaudible. I make my way back to the table with Dec and the boys. “That didn’t look good.” Dec tried to console me. “I just cannot believe she has actually moved on mate I guess I just loved her more then she loved me.” I sound defeated which I guess I am. One of the boys on the table I do not recognise butted in “Damn look at this peace of ass, what I wouldn’t give to get onto that”. I know he is referring to you, I shoot him a death look, I hate when people disrespect you like that. He isn’t wrong, you have got a sexy ass but you are so much more then that.

Your POV

I cannot believe Daniel is here, I didn’t even really invite him he took it the wrong way. Me and Daniel aren’t really together well not officially. He took me out for dinner, and we slept together and since then he thinks we are a couple. I am not ready for that, I am still no way over Mason yet. Seeing him there was what I needed, I need to speak to him, I need him to know how I feel. I made a comment to Daniel in the week about going to Paige’s birthday and how I was worried about seeing Mason. I was confiding in a friend and he took that as I needed him here apparently.

I quickly explain to Daniel that I need some air, and that I will be up soon. He is already socialising with others at that party so didn’t seem to bothered. I went outside and lit up a cigarette, I let my heart stop racing as I inhale the nicotine. As I take another large pull that’s when I see Mason emerge from the door, I suddenly start chocking. Mason laughs and passes me a bottle of water. “I have seen you have had quite a lot tonight so here, you will thank me for this in the morning.” I smile and thank him, I get butterflies in my stomach. Why does he have to be so nice.

He then turns to the cigarette in my hand, “you really shouldn’t be smoking that. It will kill you, you know.” I roll my eyes but quickly put the cigarette out. “Well I am not really your problem anymore Mase, so I wouldn’t worry.”

At that Mason looks annoyed, “yeah you are now that Daniel’s problem” he snapped. I can sense a little jealously in his voice. “Well I am a single girl Mason I can do what I want”. I can sense Mason’s demeanour change. “Yeah and apparently that means dating your co-workers that you told me not to worry about!”. Mason’s voice has now gotten raised and I can see some people outside listening to our conversation, I am not sure if they are press or not but Mason doesn’t seem to care.

“Whats that suppose to mean Mason?!” I am now starting to raise my voice to match Mason’s tone.  “How long have you been together?” Mason demanded. “If you are asking if I cheated on you Mason then no. We are not even together, we went out for one dinner, got way to drunk and slept together and now he thinks we are an item. We are not official Mason, but you know what I do not need to justify anything to you! You are the one who left as you couldn’t tell your ego you was wrong. So you know what go FUCK YOURSELF MOUNT!” which I shouted the last part and I stormed back inside leaving Mason in my tracks. I can see some camera’s flashing in the distance which may be paps which I know Mason will be really unimpressed with especially as we have just caused a scene.

As I stormed through the club, I spot Daniel. He is sitting there with a girl on each arm. I am not jealous not by a mile but I need to make a point with Mason. When he spots me he waves me over and introduces me to his new girls. Chances are he is going home with both of them later. He is a massive ladies man, I swore I would never sink so low to ever date a guy like Daniel that’s why I was so annoyed I agreed to dinner and allowed myself to get that drunk to sleep with him. I just wanted to get over Mason and I thought that would help but just seemed to make it worse. He acts like we are a couple at work and all that but will still go out with other girls at the weekend, its mad I know but we have no label so I cannot really moan.

“I need you”. I moan seductively into his ear. He looks confused at me and quickly explains to the girls he is with he will come and find them later and shoots them a wink. “Does that mean us is still on the table”. He looks me up and down like I am so kind of meat which makes me roll my eyes. That’s when he looks over my shoulder and sees me give Mason a look, “aww I got ya. Wanna make him jealous! I am all up for putting on a show!”. That I appreciate Daniel for, not many questions asked and he is always on board.

The rest of the night I spend dancing with Daniel, we are putting on a show all right. I can see so many eyes on us. Even Paige has mentioned that we need to get a room which makes me giggle. I am watching Mason the whole time, I have my back to Daniel as he guides my hips to the music grinding my ass into him but my eyes are locked with Mason. I can see the anger in his eyes, damn I am making him jealous. I can see him getting more and more worked up. I turn towards Daniel so we are facing eachother and we continue to dance as I can feel his hands on my ass as we deepen the kiss. I cannot see Mason’s face but I am assuming whatever I am doing is working, as I break the kiss with Daniel and turn around Mason is gone. I am guessing he cannot take the show any longer.

I whisper into Daniel’s ear that I am going to pop to the loo, as I am finished and walking back to the dance floor. I feel someone grab my waist and drag me to the side, I go to scream but I feel a had around my mouth and as I turn around I see its Mason. I quickly push him off of me. “What the hell are you doing? Do not touch me!” I shout, clearly the double vodka’s are kicking in as I do not know where I got this confidence from.

“What you want me to do just sit around all evening watching you dance with that guy, watching his hands all over you and not do anything. I know you were doing it to make me jealous, okay y/n you won! Now come on lets go home!” He comes closer to me and backs me into the wall so I am blocked in and have no where to go. I can feel his breathe on my neck which is giving me goosebumps. “Who said I was doing it to make you jealous?! I was just dancing with him, having fun?” I say cheekily, I know exactly what I was doing.

“Come on y/n/n, stop acting all innocent. I know that was all a show. You have had one too many too drink and acting all confident, okay its worked y/n I admit it now cut it out. We both know you are going to be coming home with me at the end at the night so why don’t we just cut it short and I will order a taxi now?”. At this we are stood face to face, I cannot deny him anymore, I grab the back of his neck and pull him in.

I can feel his tongue fighting for entrance which I give him, and we deepen the kiss. I can feel his hand on my bum as he pull himself closer to me. I can sense the urgentness of the kiss for us both, we needed eachother now.

Once we pull away for air, Mason is staring at you to say what is next? I explained that I needed to say goodbye to Paige and then I would meet him downstairs. Mason nodded and explained he needed to say goodbye to the boys. As I walk back into the party I see Daniel already moving onto another girl who he is dancing away at, I wave and mouth that I am leaving which he blows me a kiss and waves me goodbye. I eventually find Paige and explain that I am leaving, she forces out of me where I am going which she squeals with excitement and said for me to ring her in the morning and tell her everything which I agree.

Once downstairs I see Mason is already there, he explains that he has called a taxi but thinks it will be good if we get in separately to prevent further paps seeing anything. Once the taxi arrives he tells me to wait there and puts his jacket around my shoulders and says the taxi will do a lap round the block and then I can get in, “ring me if there is any issues. I mean anything y/n I will be like 5 mins”. I nod and the cold air is suddenly hitting me. I can feel the alcohol now having an effect on me.

Before I know it the taxi has done its lap and waiting outside for me. I quickly run and jump in the taxi hoping to warm up as I am now freezing. Once inside the taxi Mason and I cannot keep our hands off eachother, trying to remember eachothers bodies and we are fighting for air. We pull up outside Mason’s house before I knew it. I sense of anxiety suddenly rushes over me when I realise that it used to be our house.

I walk inside slowly and Mason can sense something is wrong, “whats up? You having second thoughts?” I shake my head as believe me the only thing I know right now is that I need Mason but it just feels weird being here. “I just cannot believe the last time we were both stood here together was that night. It just all feels a bit to real now”. I didn’t even know I was crying until Mason quickly wrapped his arms around me and used his thumb to wipe away my tears. “We don’t have to do anything you know. If you not comfortable, its fine honestly.”

I shake my head and give him a malicious smile, and attack his lips again. I know he needs me as much as I need him. We continue to remember eachothers bodies still standing in the entrance hall, we start to discard the clothing and Mason leads me up the stairs still not breaking the kiss. Before I know it we reached the bedroom and Mason throws me onto the bed and jumps on top, we continue to kiss and I can feel myself getting wet just by the anticipation of whats to come.

Mason starts to kiss down my body and puts my nipple in his mouth as he plays with the other one through his fingers. I try to supress the moan but I can’t. “Don’t be quiet baby, I wanna hear you.” Which makes me moan louder. He comes up and continues to kiss me, he bites my lip and then I go to his neck leaving a love bite as he continues to grind into me. I can feel how hard he is getting.

He reaches down to take my underwear off, and starts to play with my folds. He puts a finger slowly into me which makes me moan into his neck. “Damn someone is wet”. I can see the cocky smile on his face knowing the effect he has on me. “Well I cannot help what you do to me Mount”. Mason lines himself up with your core and places himself on top of you, as he slowly thrusts in the sudden change in size makes me whimper. “Fuck y/n that feels so good. I forgotten how fucking good that pussy feels”. He gives me a minute to adjust to his size and then starts to move, I cannot suppress the moans that are escaping my mouth and that is just encouraging him more. “Fuck Mason, harder please” I need him to destroy me tonight. Mason agrees with my demand and starts pounding me. “Go on baby cum for me, I know you want to. Come on I wanna feel that pussy cum all over this cock”.

The sound of Mason dirty talking me is edging me closer, Mason then hits the spot and I cannot contain it anymore and cum all over his dick. I am seeing stars trying to hold onto the duvet for dear life as I am coming down from high. “Uh right there y/n, fuck you are so perfect”. I feel his dick twitch as he reaches his high, luckily he pulls out just in time and cums all over my chest. He rolls over as we both lay there breathless. I am the first one to speak “fuck I forgot how good our sex is”.

Mason looks over at me and giggles knowing the affect he had on me, “I had to give you something, you looked breathtaking all night. I had to make you remember why you were mine”. I am giggling along with him still coming down with my high. We quickly run to the bathroom and get cleaned up. “You hungry baby girl?”

I nod agreeing, he looks at his phone and turns to me “Carlos’ is still open you fancy sharing a pizza. I think carbs will be good for you to soak up the alcohol.” The thought of Carlos’ makes me mouth water the pizza was my favourite. “Its like you read my mind Mount”. Mason began making the order on his phone.

As he is doing this I am lying in bed with one of his tops on scrolling through my feed, that’s when a news article catches my eye. Mason Mount Caught Arguing Outside Club With Mystery Women Just Days After His Date With Girlfriend VS Model Jennifer Green. My mouth drops, he has a girlfriend What The Fuck.

Mason can see that the atmosphere has suddenly become tense, “everything okay?” Mason asked. I don’t even know I am still in shock, I cannot believe it. I turn my phone around which Mason grabs a quick glance at the headline. He looks down “y/n I can explain its not what you think”. I am not even listening to what he is saying as I quickly see a pair of his joggers on the floor which I put on as I just need some clothes to leave as quick as I can. “There is nothing to say Mase, you used me to get what you want. Well you got it enough said, I just cannot believe I was that stupid”. I spat that last part defeated. I cannot believe I let Mason hurt me like that again. “Don’t call me Mason we are done”.

I can hear him shouting after me as I am walking out his house, but I just keep walking to make sure I do not give in. I cannot believe I let him get that close to me again.

The next couple of days have been back to normal, work has been non-stop stressful. Paige keeps messaging me asking what happened between me and Mason which I cannot bring myself to actually admit what happened so I just keep dodging the question. I blocked Masons number and on socials as he kept ringing and messaging me. I have been cheated on before and he knows that, how can he make me the other women? I feel awful I cannot believe he put me in the situation.

I am curled up on the sofa, it’s the first time in weeks I am actually home from work at a reasonable time. I am in my pyjamas all wrapped up in a blanket watching Netflix when I hear a knock at my door. I am so confused to who it can be here at this time. I quickly go to open it, shocked to see Mason standing there in the rain. I try to shut the door but he pushed the door preventing me from closing it. “Please y/n, I have drove nearly 3 hours. Standing in the rain, at least let me come in and explain myself please”. You give in as he has come a long way and its raining you do feel bad.

You walk him through the flat, so you are in the living room. “Do you want a drink or anything? I have your clothes that I went home in the other day if you wanna get changed out of the wet clothes?” As much as I am angry with him right now, I hate how much I care.

“I am alright, I am only wet from the run from the car. But I will take a cup of tea please.”  I nod and quickly make us both a cup of tea and settle on the sofa next to him.

“Thank you for letting me in, you blocked me on everything I have been trying to ring you. I need to explain myself it is not what you think.”

I roll my eyes, “what do you mean its not what I think. You have a girlfriend Mason and then let me sleep with you. You made me the other woman. You know I have been cheated on before, I know how it feels how could you make me do that! I hate you for that Mason” my voice is becoming a little raised and I am trying to focus on keeping it low. As I really do not want a fight right now.

“Please do not say you hate me y/n/n please. Honestly its not what you think just give me a chance to explain”. I can see the hurt in his voice so I let him continue. After all he did come a long way, “go on then Mase, explain”.

I can see the relief on my Mason’s face that I am letting him continue and not shutting him down, “thank you. Look we are not together, she isn’t my girlfriend.” I nod, but the problem is I have head that so many times before. “Have you been out with her?” Mason nods but stays silent, “have you slept with her?” He lowers his head like he is embarrassed and nods again, still remaining silent.

“Well then Mase, it seems like a bit of a relationship to me.” Mason is playing with the cup in his hands not making eye contact with me. I can see he is thinking of his next words carefully. “Y/n/n its not what you think, I was a mess after things ended I wasn’t doing anything promotion related I only left the house if it was training or games and even then my head wasn’t in it. Management thought it would be good idea if I was spotted with Jennifer. Her management team agreed thought it would be good publicity for her also to be spotted with a footballer. We spoke over the phone a little, it was nice to take my mind of you for a little if I am being honest. We went out on a couple of dates, which the paps were always called which we assumed were our management teams. It was all staged none of it was real”.

I am trying to process what Mason is saying, but something doesn’t add up. “Okay Mase, I understand the whole dating thing. So why did you sleep with her, there were no paps during that so no one would know so that didn’t need staging. So I guess that means you just wanted to have sex with her?”

I can see Mason knows I got him there, “I don’t know baby, honestly I don’t know. We went out for dinner and I don’t know it just happened. I thought of you the whole time though”. He says the last part softly. I can see he is not enjoying this conversation.

“Of course you did”. I said sarcastically and rolled my eyes. “How many people did you sleep with since we ended?” I asked, I can see he is taken back by this question, he is quick to respond with a snarky comment. “what kind of question is that? How many people did you sleep with?” he was becoming defensive.

I laughed at him “1.. I slept with one person Mase. Daniel, and that was after a bottle worth of vodka. I instantly regretted it in the morning. Your turn!” Mason looks down like he doesn’t want to answer. “5, I slept with five people. Including Jennifer. None of them compared to you though. Honestly y/n you are the best person I have ever had sex with, you are the only person I want to have sex with. Everytime I was them, I was imagining it was you.”

“Of course you did Mason, you are telling me you had a Victoria Secret model on top of you and you are sitting there imaging it was me. Fuck off Mase how gullible do you think I am?!”. Mason shuffles closer to me on the sofa and places his hand on my thigh. “Y/n you are the most sexiest women I have ever met and ever been with. Your body is incredible and you are just so beautiful inside and out. Believe me, you are the only women I want to have sex with again. You are the only one it means something with.”

I can feel the tears rolling down my face, I cannot help it. Mason looks at me sympathetically, and holds my head in his hand using his thumb to wipe away the tears as they roll down my face. He places a slow soft kiss to my lips, I kiss him back. He is like air to me, I just cannot help but breathe him in. “I know you have driven a long way Mase, but I need time. We were toxic Mason when we moved to Manchester, it all got way too much. That fight you just walked away as if I meant nothing, it was a silly fight it never should of happened but instead of staying and fighting for us you walked away like it was the easiest thing to do, like I meant nothing to you. Then to lead me on and everything and then to find out you got a girlfriend its not fair Mason. I deserve better than that.”

“I know you do y/n, you deserve so much better. I promise you, if you want to work on this again I will do so much better. I will be the guy you need me to be. I promise to always fight for us just please give me this chance.”

His words are good, but I just generally do not know where my head is at anymore. “So whats going to happen between you and that Jennifer”. He lets out a deep breathe “we are not together y/n/n I can ring her right now and prove it if you want? Honestly if you want me then I will tell my management team that we are back together and Jennifer will be out of my life I promise. Just please baby girl, I will beg if that’s what you want just please. I cannot be without you.”

My head is all over the place, I just do not know what to do. “I know you want an answer right now Mason but I cannot give you that. I am sorry you cannot ambush me and make such a life changing decision without taking the time to make a decision. So you need to give me time, but I promise I will think about it.”

“That’s all I wanted to hear thank you. I will leave you be. Just please consider us again. I love you more then anything y/n. Forever and always”. That was always our saying forever and always. We used to message eachother that all the time, after every fight that’s what we used to say when making up. It was our saying. I lean into Mason and kiss his lips, it’s a slow kiss but he deepens the kiss, trying to gain access with his tongue which I allow. I grab the back of his head pulling him closer, I can feel his hands on my hips. There is nothing more that I want right now then to continue but we can’t. If we do this it will make the decision even harder. I quickly pull away. “Sorry I got a little carried away, I just can’t help myself when I am around you”. He makes me blush.

Mason sees himself out, and places a small kiss to my lips. I just wish I knew what I need to do.

Masons POV

I haven’t heard from y/n since I went round that night, I messaged you once I was home and realised that you unblocked me, I thought that was progress but all the messages I sent to you, you read but never replied so maybe there wasn’t progress.

It was my birthday today, I woke up to a message you from you “Happy Birthday Gorgeous boy! Have the best day ever!! Get spoilt rotten”. I smile at this message out of everyone I wanted to speak to today it was you. I just wish I could see you. My family are down and me and Lewis are going golfing this morning then having dinner with my family later which will be nice. I am grateful for this, but part of me really hoped that I would see you.

We pull into the driveway as me and Lewis return home after our golf day. The house is silent and dark which is unusual as I know my family are there. Something is wrong I thought. As I open the door the lights suddenly flick on and everyone jumps out: SURPRISE!!! Everyone shouts. Bless them they have thrown me a surprise party. I am hugging everyone and thanking them for coming, it’s a mixture of friends and family and team mates. That’s when I see you. No it cannot be, am I seeing things.

I quickly walk over to you, you spot me coming up to you. You give me a big smile, “Surprise birthday boy!” I quickly embrace you in my arms to make sure you are real. “What are you doing here?” I am so confused as to what you are doing here and why didn’t you tell me you were coming.

“Your mum rang me.. she said you told her about everything that happened between us recently. She said ‘he wouldn’t want to pressure you but I know he would love to see you’, then she persuaded me saying they all wanted to see me and told me about a surprise party and you know I had to be a part of that.” I grab you by your waist and embrace you in my arms, I stand there a little longer then maybe we should just staring into your eyes. I place a kiss to your lips, I love how soft they are. “People are staring Mase”, I giggle “well let them stare” and I continue to kiss you. “come on I will introduce you”. I grab your hand and make my way around the party, I love holding your hand and talking to people with you, it feels like old times again it feels real.

People start to leave the party as its finishing, I haven’t left your side the whole time. I turn to you, “please tell me you are staying the night I cannot think of you being in Manchester and not falling asleep with you on my birthday”. You give me a smile, I can even see a sparkle in your eyes “of course I am Mase, I promised your family I would stay and spend your birthday with you so I do not break a promise. I am just going to run upstairs quickly and get changed into something more comfy I need to get out of these heals and dress”. I know how much you love your comfies, chances are you are probably going to come downstairs wearing something that belongs to me.

I find my family sitting in the front room, “Thank you” I say, they look at me confused but my mum catches on to what I am saying. “We have no idea what you are talking about” she is trying to play dumb. Lewis then buts in “you really think we wouldn’t hear about it for the rest of the year if we throw you a surprise party and didn’t invite her”. I give him a bro hug, I appreciate them all for this, I know it was a rocky start with them getting on board with y/n as she wasn’t famous they were worried that you were after my fame and money, but after they met you and got to know you they loved you, they knew you didn’t care about all that and just wanted me. My mum then speaks up “just do us a favour Mase, if she allows you back which if I were her I probably wouldn’t but we can all see how much she loves you. So if she does do not break her heart again, you always fight for that girl. You got a keeper there”. I thank my mum and quickly give her a hug as y/n walks in and we try to act normal but she can probably tell we are talking about her.

We spend the rest of the evening all curled up in the living room, having a couple of drinks and a laugh. You are curled up in my arms with your legs wrapped underneath you so you can be closer to me which I am not complaining. Everyone confirms they are going to go to bed and we discuss plans for tomorrow. “shall we go up?” I ask you. “I am actually really cold, I am going to run a bath, do you want to join me?” I smile as if there is any other answer to that question apart from yes, and I run up the stairs behind you.

I watch as you run the bath, and wrap your hair into a clip so it doesn’t get wet and watch you slowly underdress. Your body is unreal, I know you have never been the most confident but in my eyes you are the most perfect women. I slowly get into the bath, which you come and sit inbetween my legs. I am slowly running my hands up and down your arm which I can feel the goosebumps. “Well not that I am complaining sitting here like this with you, but you haven’t made a decision”. I hear you laugh as if I have just said the most silliest thing in the world. “Of course I am taking you back Mase its always been you, there will never be anyone else, its always you. Forever and always.” You turn your head to give me a kiss which I reciprocate. “Forever and always baby girl.”

“Hold on stay there” I reach out the bath and grab my phone. “Stay right there” I take a photo of you, your back is turned so no one can see anything apart from your bare back and your hair in a clip and your face is to the side so your whole face isn’t in it. “What are you doing?” I hear you ask confused. “Socials.. now that I am not single everyone needs to know. Don’t worry your face isn’t in it. Unless you want it in it, I have no problem telling the world you are mine”. I see you smile at this. “The photo is fine Mase, I like how it before I do not need all your crazy fan girls coming for me” which we both laughed at this. “I love you y/n” you turn to face me again “it will never be the amount that I love you”.

I added the photo to my socials with the caption “Best birthday present ever getting you back. #foreverandalways.”

[theneworder]

TAKING A ROADTRIP

So this isn’t the story you asked for, but it’s the one that came to me when I sat down to write. This is what I wanted to write. That should be enough.

“One week?” She had asked, unsure of why she was even contemplating this.

“Yes, baby. One week. That’s all. One week, and we can forget that any of this happened.” You flushed in shame, not just in what you were asking of her, but also the erection that had quickly followed after.

Months ago, you had messaged an online profile, someone professing to be a dom and a bull, someone who claimed to be able to corrupt women, turn them into bimbos, sluts, bitches, whatever he felt like, and whatever lay dormant within them. You professed your fantasies, talked about them for hours.. Over the days, these fantasies turned into careful planning, and before you knew it, he had turned up at your door in a white sportscar, under the pretense of being your old roommate from college, a gay man who needed a fake girlfirend to bring to his cousin’s wedding.

Of course she was furious that you would agree to such a thing without consultation, but eager to look after a vulnerable gay man, to prove her credentials as a radical feminist, she couldn’t bring herself to say no once she understood the situation. For your part, you couldn’t help but find your head swimming.. It all felt a little real when the sportscar had parked up outside. Your real fantasy had been to see your girlfriend corrupted into a leathered biker queen, and this bull’s sportscar was close enough at least, but was this what you really wanted? Your heart felt like it would explode through the meeting, the feigned catch-up, you thought you were going to be sick when they left through the front door. But when you heard the rev of the engine and your girlfriend pulling away in a stranger’s car, a quiet descended on your mind… and you felt a stirring in your crotch.

A picture arrived in your inbox a week later. You’d had a steady stream of texts from her the first three days, they slowed after that, and she left you on read by day 6.. This was day 8.

“We’ve been on a little roadtrip.”

You couldn't believe your eyes. This had to be fake? Your girlfriend was covered in tattoos, glasses gone, full face of makeup, her nails had been done, her hair tied back. She was sat in front of the same white car she had left in, but there was no way she would wear anything like that - tight, form fitting black material, and those shoes?! She looked like porn. The way she looked at the camera too, you had never seen that look before - entitled, expectant.. even aroused? Another text.

"You can't believe it can you?"

"Hahahaha you fucking loser."

"You know all she needed was to actually feel desired?"

You were reeling. Of course you wanted this girl.. But this wasn't the plain girl you fantasised about corrupting just to spice up your sex life, the same girl you shared pictures of with other men because you couldn't cum any other way, the girl you avoided having sex with because you wanted to masturbate in the bathroom instead...

No.. This was the girl that was inside her all along. But you never realised that. You were about to type a response but another text came through.. a voice note..

It started with a woman's laugh, and then: "Daddy told me all about your sick little plan~ God what a fucking loser I was dating.. You know, all this time I thought I was the problem. But daddy wanted me, I felt that the first time he put his arm around me, the first night we parked up outside that motel... He wanted me to be my best self.." The voice note trailed off into a small giggle.. "I can't believe you even thought I was yours to give away."

You felt that same sickness welling up inside you. The one you felt when the two of them left. You tried to type, but no words came to mind, you were pathetic, how could you argue with that; all you could think of to type was: "I'm sorry".

As you sat, alone, in bed that night, still in shock, you felt your phone buzzing. It was a video call from your girlfriend. Your heart started to beat again, a thousand times a second, but you had to pick up, just for a chance to say sorry, to tell her what she meant to you, to tell her that from now on you would just be honest to her.

You never got that chance. Instead he picked up, speaking before you even got the chance:

"Hhahaha, 'sup loser. So, in case you haven't realised. There never was any deal - I decided to make her mine."

You started to speak but he cut you off again:

"I decided I'll let you watch though."

And for some reason you couldn't stop watching.

He turned the camera round to reveal your girlfriend, face made up, collar round her neck, sitting on a motel bed, breathing heavily, expectantly. You saw a strong hand reach down and caress her face.

And for some reason you couldn't stop yourself getting hard.

It felt like hours. You watched another man stroke your girlfriend's face, feed her his fingers. You watched his muscles flex as he moved past the camera, the true image of a man who took what he wanted. What he wanted was your girlfriend. That much was clear when he pulled up her skirt, fondled her bare ass.

And for some reason, hearing her moan, you couldn't stop yourself reaching into your shorts.

As you watched him slide her onto his lap, now stripped to underwear you'd never seen before, as you watched her face soften, gave in to his assured touch, as you watched your ex-girlfriend melt onto his perfect cock, you couldn't help but stroke, stroke to the girl she was becoming. She was becoming someone else, someone you'd never know, but she was also becoming your dream - a woman that no man could ever resist.

You were still jerking when the video stopped.

No one hung up, you were still watching them intently, watching her moan as he tasted every inch of her, watching her body grind into his, imagining with every fibre of your being that it was you doing that to her. No, you suddenly became aware that the video stopped because they forgot about you. The phone had run out of battery after two hours. No one in that room realised you were even still there.

Every one of your sick little fantasies had come true and you had lost her. She was falling in love with another man, becoming better than you ever believed she could be, and you were still masturbating to the thought, alone, in your pathetic mess.

And that's how she found you. A week later. In a filthy apartment, you were jerking your tiny cock to that photo of her in front of that fucking car, jerking to every call she refused to pick up, and then the bell rang. She had come to pick up her things. Well, the expensive stuff.

You almost came on the spot.

[flufflecat]

Billtlest pet shop

[faaun]

procrastination is starting to have its consequences finally

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

aaanyway

[rosicheeks]

.

[running-in-the-dark]

I was asleep for most of yesterday. and today as well. like I basically only woke up to eat, watch tv for a little bit, and then I fell asleep again. I'm so tired and dizzy.

I'm really hoping it'll be better tomorrow. I really gotta start/continue writing my thesis. 😭