#i think sarah being put in the games is too easy tbh and i think her being killed by soldiers in this au is a cool way to reflect the game

[mariatesstruther]

TLOU AU where Joel has to mentor Ellie, having survived his own and having watched his daughter die, name drawn out at just 12 after he pissed off the people in charge.

(Mentor Joel who died because he went feral in games, everyone knows it. Mentor Tess who survived by being charismatic and downplaying her abilities at first.)

oh bestie!!!! yes!! check my “hg au” tag! i have a whole world for you!! ive been playing around with these ideas so much that im definitely hoping i can work on it as a full fic for 2024.

i was thinking about mentor joel a lot today, actually, and the logistics of him having a daughter who has been killed by the time ellie gets reaped. thinking along the lines of him being like haymitch (which i think is perfect considering haymitch also apparently had a younger brother??? and a gf??? slay), he would’ve been reaped and won the second quarter quell just before he turned 18

so then where would sarah come in????? i was thinking about this today. i really doubt joel would’ve willingly had any children after winning. it’s an extremely dangerous and careless thing to do knowing that, as a victor, you and your family essentially become capital property.

but what is sarah was conceived BEFORE joel was reaped??? what if joel and his girlfriend, young and stupid with love and without reliable contraception, got pregnant before he won?? what if joel went into the games never wanting the capitol to find out about sarah at all?????

maybe the plan had been for her to be raised by her mother and taken care of by joel in secret once he won. it wasn’t uncommon for people in twelve to take care of other children in the community, and the capital wouldn’t care enough to notice joel giving away his winnings. but maybe —like most plan against the capital—it was futile: sarah’s home-birth, which in twelve were always risky for mother and child alike, had been deadly for lucy. maybe joel had been forced to publicly claim sarah has his own before she was sent to an orphanage

and maybe when the capital finds out, they’re forced to play along with it: they celebrate sarah miller as “the capital’s darling, the child of the games,” a pure and innocent reminder of the joy that came from an orderly world such as theirs. then, as revenge, they either kill her intentionally in a later games or “unintentionally” in some crossfire between rebels and peacekeepers

[laiiaaa]

NICE TO MEET YOU — JJ MAYBANK (PROLOGUE)

summary: For much of his teenaged life, JJ has had it easy when it comes to charm. You turn out to be a formidable opponent.

length: 2.7k

contains: uhhh drinking beer?? (gross tbh!), actually pretty PG, warning for JJ being a whiny little brat and a little mean to his friends and a bit of a dork (it's painful but we love him...maybe), NOT proofread ok be nice

masterlist | next

“JJ, are you gonna go up to her? Or just keep staring at her like a creep?”

He almost doesn’t hear Kiara, and maybe he wouldn’t have if it weren’t for John B hitting him in the back of the head. 

“Ah—what the fuck, man?” JJ bats John B away before answering to Kie. “I’m not staring. I don’t even know what you’re talking about.” He takes another sip from his beer and puts his weight on his free hand. 

This isn’t his usual routine—there’s a certain thrum in his veins that tells him tonight has a little more weight to it than he’s used to. His usual routine, of course, is simple: go to kegger, find a touron, flirt with her, engage in some��precarious activities, bid farewell when morning comes (or, if he gets lucky, before dawn). There’s never been any issue. It’s fun, he’s young, he’s a good-looking guy, all parties are willing.

But now you have caught his eye, and he’s not sure if this routine will be able to keep up.

“I think you do,” Sarah insists. “We all know you’re checking her out.” His face stays blank, so she pushes him further. “Come on, JJ. With the crochet bikini top and the red converse?”

“They’re brown, actually—”

“Oh, so you are staring. Got it.”

The rest of the group laughs at JJ’s expense, and he has to admit he did walk right into it. He’s just…off his game. 

He shoots up from his seat anyway, downing the last of his beer in an attempt to build up some courage. “I’m gonna go up to her.”

Pope raises his brows. “Right now?”

The blonde jumps, shakes out his limbs, gets the blood flowing. “Right now.”

“Oh,” Kie quips.

He points back at her, still psyching himself up. “Shut up, Kie, you started this.”

She lifts her hands up defensively, and John B jumps in again. “You gonna start walking over there, or…?”

JJ turns his head, eyes you sitting alone on a piece of driftwood. “Yep. Gonna do that now.” Another couple jumps and a shake of his head for good measure. A deep, exaggerated breath. He points to Kie and says, “Fuck you,” then Sarah, “Fuck you,” then John B, “And fuck you,” though there’s no real malice in his words. He starts taking hastened steps backwards, and lends a quick wave as he calls out, “Love you, Pope!” 

If the pogues say anything in response, he doesn’t hear them.

A breeze casts through his hair as he walks over to you, and his nerves are on the rise again. It takes twenty paces before he’s seriously regretting this gusto, another five before he considers turning around, a painful ten more, until he’s close enough to be officially approaching you and it’s too late. His pulse is pounding in his ears. You’re wearing a crochet bikini top as Sarah described, loose lightwash shorts covering the bottom half of the set, and have brown converse on, as he thought. There’s a glow to your skin that makes him think you came straight from the beach.

You pay him no mind until he’s looking over you, five feet away. “Hi.”

Are you talking to him? (Yes, you are—you’re looking straight at him.) 

“Hey,” he answers, gesturing to your makeshift seat. “Can I sit?” He’s more antsy now that he’s getting a close up view. He runs a hand through his hair to at least do something to hide it.

“Be my guest.” You move to the side and tap the space next to you, looking up and giving him a smile he could die for.

It takes him a second to process he’s gotten this far. “Thanks,” he says. When he does sit down, his knee nearly brushes past yours.

“And what brings you to this side of the party?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugs—lie. “You seemed…uh, interesting?” As soon as the words come out they leave a bad taste in his mouth. Since when is he so bad at this?

“Interesting? Jeez,” you laugh, “And here I was thinking I had a cute boy approach me to flirt.” You brush your hair out of your face, looking off to the ocean as a distraction. The sun has long since set, but there’s still a twilight glow to the sky.

“Wait, wait—that’s not what I meant.” He shifts his body to face you, a hand hovering by your knee as if he needs that physical connection to make you hear him. “It came out wrong. I’ve just never seen you around, y’know?”

“I guess we have that in common, huh?”

He’s sure he’s already fucked this up, and he can’t help but curse himself for it. Hidden somewhere—maybe in your snarky tone, or your emerging smirk, he also thinks there’s a chance. “Yeah,” he says, taking a deep breath. “Yeah.” He has to shoot a look over to his friends, who are oh so attentive to this initial meeting. It would be too embarrassing to return so soon. “Did I fuck this up already? Should I leave?”

It’s your turn to observe him, now. The pensive look on his face, the fidgety hands, the toned arms. What’s the worst that could happen? “No, you can stay. We can start over if you’d like.” 

He nods his head, his muscles relax. “Okay.”

“Okay,” you agree, offering him your hand and your name.

“JJ,” he offers you in return, taking your hand in his for a respectable shake. This could work, he thinks. 

“Nice to meet you.” You smile and let go of his hand. He’s cute, you think.

“Nice to meet you, too.” His hand still buzzes even after touching you. “Do you live on the island?” Please say yes, please say yes. 

“Only in the summers I do. My grandparents’ house. I’m guessing you do, though?”

A piece of his heart drops, but not entirely. “Yeah—how’d you know?”

“It’s not the type of question someone asks if they’re only here for vacation; they usually just assume your stay is temporary too.” You shrug. “Just my experience.”

“Huh.” He nods his head as if you’ve bestowed upon him a revelation. “How long’ve you been coming here, then?”

“Oh, I can’t even remember. Maybe since I was five?”

“Really.” He can’t fight off the smile that emerges, and he doesn’t even know why. This isn’t any extraordinary conversation, this isn’t something he hasn’t done before, yet he’s more nervous than he’s ever been talking to a girl. “Where at?”

You smirk, instinctively turning your body towards him the slightest bit. Much like when he first sat down, your knees almost touch. “Not far from here, two miles tops, on the water. Why, you wanna stalk me or something?”

He smiles back at you. “No—”

“Really? Even though I’m interesting?” You start to think you’ll never get tired of teasing this boy, especially if it means seeing that smile and the dimple that follows.

He turns away and ducks his head down, hiding his embarrassment. “I thought you said we could start over?”

You make a thoughtful face as if you were mulling over his words, and you can feel his gaze on you. “I did say that, didn’t I? Hm, guess I forgot.”

“Guess so,” he agrees, leaning back and putting his weight into his arms. 

“Your turn to make it even.” You push lightly against his shoulder as you jest. God, those arms. “Where can I stalk you?”

“Uh…” He laughs to himself, embarrassment more genuine this time. His eyes shoot up to the sky to avoid yours. How much should he tell? “You, uh…you don’t want to know that.” And that’s already more than enough. He doesn’t do this—he shouldn’t, really. He knows that this is how bad decisions start, and from there comes even worse consequences.

You furrow your brows. “What do you mean?” 

No answer. Sure, he’s had his share of girls over at The Chateau, but being poor isn’t necessarily something you throw at the nearest girl you’ve got your eye on. Especially, he thinks, not one with a smile like yours.

Your voice goes a bit softer, still curious. “Are you on The Cut?” You lean a little closer, dropping your head on the shoulder closest to him, nearly on his own. He smells of beer and the beach and a bit of amber. 

When he turns to face you, he’s not even six inches from kissing you. His jaw goes slack as he thinks over your question—which seems like the millionth of the night, and he’s sure he’d take a million more if time would allow—and his eyes work their way around your face, trying to burn it into his memory. If he tells you the truth, you might go, but he’s got a strong feeling that you’d find out about a lie. 

“I know we don’t even know each other,” you start, taking in a breath that seems to justify gazing at his lips for a little too long for only having met minutes ago, “But I’d hope you wouldn’t pin me as the type to judge.”

He scoffs, turning again to avoid the feeling in his gut when you hold eye contact—like you can read from him things he doesn’t know himself. “I didn’t pin you as anything, princess.” There’s an edge to his voice he doesn’t really mean, some spite in the name princess, and he curses himself again. This shouldn’t be so hard.

Before you give him a quip, you turn your eye to a group of teens, two boys and two girls, who seem to be watching you and JJ. They look at you, then to each other, point here and there, then giggle. You figure they notice your attention, because soon enough they’ve already stopped, instead stifling laughter amongst themselves. 

“JJ, I know I just said I’m not the type to judge, but I really hope those aren’t your friends over there watching us.”

This time, his heart does drop entirely. Is this a fucking joke? His first thought is that you're mistaking some nosy tourons for his flock, but lo and behold, those terrible four are his friends, and he sees for himself their scheming. 

“What the fuck…” he mumbles to himself. He gives you a sympathetic look, aware of how this might appear. “I’m sorry, I don’t know why they—they’re just really annoying sometimes.” He pauses his rambling for a moment to flip them off. “I know this looks bad, I get that—”

“Oh, it does,” you add, fueling the fire that is his panic. 

But then you’re laughing, joking about how panicked he looks, and he has another million questions to ask because why are you laughing when he looks like a fucking douchebag right now?

“I don’t really care, though, if it makes you feel better.” You lend him a smile as you check your watch. “I should be heading home, anyway.”

Fuck. “Why?” He knows how desperate he sounds, but he only just met you, and he’s already made a fool of himself. Twice.

You press your hands to your knees as you sit up. “It’s late, and I’ve got a curfew I already missed.” He’s wearing a pleasing look as you peer down on him, his hand wavering out to grab yours. “It was nice to meet you. Tell your friends I say hi.”

Why couldn’t he have talked to you earlier? He doesn’t think so much before doing it—he jolts up from his seat and grabs your hand, gently. What the fuck what the fuck what the fuck am I doing right now? “Can I at least get your number?”

You take a few steps back, testing his reach and his adamance to keep you tethered for more. This could be fun. “No,” you chirp. “I don’t give my number to strangers.” You slip your hand from his and turn around, feet digging into soft sand as you make your escape, though you’re coy enough to give him a half-turn and a barely-there wave.

You’re ten paces away when he finally comes to his senses. “What if I want to see you again?” he calls after you, trying to make himself heard over the commotion (oh, how stupid it all is to him now) and the music playing (nobody wants to hear that, anyway). He feels a force gluing him in place, like you’ll disappear if he follows.

“You’ll figure it out!” you shout back over your shoulder. You pick up your pace, leaving JJ with nothing more than a silhouette to seek and a name to your face.

He’s stuck in place, mouth open as if he were to plead for you to come back. In his hand he swears he can still feel your touch, or the electricity you left behind, at least. He pictures how close you were, how he could’ve taken your lips in his, how he could’ve cradled your jaw in his hands and made him yours for that moment.

What the fuck just happened? What is he doing?

He quickly snaps out of this daze. He had your attention for—what, five minutes? Ten if he’s generous? This isn’t like him, to be caught up on another one getting away. That’s all it was: another one. He’s sure that he’ll find another girl another night, and he’ll forget whatever this was. Was—past tense, a good old friend. 

Running a hand through his hair, he takes in the breeze again before turning back to the pogues. There’s levity in his steps, his previous anxiety gone. He figures this is a good thing, in fact—he doesn’t need his summer marred by a relationship that isn’t even meant to be.

As JJ walks closer, Pope makes a face at him, lifting his hands by his shoulders in confusion. “What happened over there?”

JJ shrugs, offers little unrest. “Nothing, man. Talked her up a bit…” He trails off, casting an over the shoulder glance to your former location.

“And…?” Sarah continues.

Kie sips her beer and smiles to herself. “We tried to see what was happening—”

“Yeah, well that much was obvious—” JJ snaps, huffing as he sits next to Pope for being the least offensive of the bunch— “She saw you guys.” He snatches up a rock by his feet and turns it in his hands.

The group knows better than to push him when he’s like this—not when they want to enjoy the rest of the night, at least. John B, Sarah, and Kie resume their conversation about some touron group they'd witnessed earlier, and JJ finds himself filled with disinterest at the thought of listening, even on its periphery. He throws the stone back into the sand and takes a helping of beer when Pope offers it.

There’s an elbow nudging his side, followed by Pope’s voice. “You alright?”

He shrugs, makes a sour face. “Yeah, she was cool, ‘s all.”

Pope’s brows twist in confusion. “That girl you met?” He waits for the other to nod his head. “You get her name at least?”

JJ nods again. “Not like I’ll see her again. She said she’s been here every summer since she was little, and it was only now that I saw her.”

“So?” He pats JJ’s back, hard enough to hopefully knock some sense into him. “You wanna see her again, right?”

He takes a sip, shrugging again. “Not really.” Another sip, a glance to and fro. 

“I mean, odds are that you will eventually run into her, might as well be expecting it.”

He scoffs, lending Pope a smile to show his incredulity. “Odds are, I won’t. And I’d prefer to keep it that way.” He tilts his head back with his cup against his lip, downing the last of his beer and the taste of a fib. Or two. Or three.

JJ accepts that he drew the short straw for the night. All he has left of you is a name and a face and a feeling, and if he knew better, he wouldn’t press his luck. Because truthfully, the odds don't seem to be in his favor.

[sungtaro]

hopefully am not too late to the kpop game 🫡🫶 so if you'll still have me, to me, you give off:

- hoyoung - verivery. he's an agent of chaos, while being such a sweetheart and you give off those vibes tbh !! ik you're chaotic to those you're friends with and close with and that's hoyo !! he'll go from sitting quietly to (fondly) pestering members (mainly dongheon bc it's fun). he's said before that he's naturally quiet and reserved but he likes to express himself with verrers, and while ik you're an extrovert, the core point stays the same, in that while perhaps you aren't as quiet or reserved, all of us - your friends, are verrers in this case to your hoyoung and we love seeing you express yourself to and with us

- dokyeom - seventeen. what can i say for him that others already haven't? you're such a sweet person, so kind and loving just like dk. always ready to put a smile on someone one minute, and ready to have a deeper conversation the next. always there actively wanting to hear about what we got up to bc you genuinely want to know and the way you talk and interact with everyone here is always full of love and comfort and sweet words

- hwanwoong - oneus. MOOD MAKER !! he's a funky lil dude<3 who is so easy to loveeeee. big smiles, comfy vibes, welcoming aura. perfect lil human. he feels like a warm, comforting hug after a long day, or curling up with a hot chocolate watching rain hit the window

- yunho - ateez. he's another mood maker, but he's also so observant. he'll be right there having fun and being chaotic and giggling, but almost unnoticeably, he's always keeping an eye on everyone and making sure everyone's okay 🫶 yuyu also biiiiig golden retriever vibes and idk i feel they fit !! (you also give cat vibes, so, like gye from vrvr and san from atz). he has a lot of feelings and a lot of love to give and that's you 🫵

sarah this is so sweet and thought out 😭 thank you for aligning me with such lovely personalities. and re: hoyoung and being reserved it's funny bc i often come off as being more quiet/reserved when first meeting but that's just bc i'm also s/sensing type and need to evaluate my environment before i open up more and get into that extrovert side that talks a lot! i definitely need to feel comfortable to express myself too so in that way i think you're spot on. and the rest of these are such nice comparisons 🥹

i want to give one back to you so i'm sitting here like WHO is the most attentive idol i know KJBDJGHB i think i have to say cravity jungmo!! he quietly takes care of everyone, really knows his members preferences and is super easygoing. just really approachable and i think a safe space for the other members 🥲

[aclosetfan]

are u still doing the ask game? can i ask for 19 or 20?

for you anon, of course! 20 is actually a really lame two-sentence note that isn't worth anyone's time, so I'll do 19!

19 is a really sad story tbh. I've always really liked the character Sedusa and it kills me that the writers never did more with her. I believe they said the reason why was because they couldn't think of many kid-friendly scenarios to put her in, which is fair lmao.

lol one of my notes for this outline is "this is my dark manifesto to [Sedusa] and it comes off like a bad CW remake," which was written way before the CW show announcement. so not to get a big ego about things, but I totally beat them to the punch. This fic is my only rated M fic (though arguably Acting Normal may also change into M just for its dark themes as well).

This story is adequately tilted "Sedusa" and it follows how a plain jane named Sara became one of Townsville's most notorious villains. The plot's below, though content warning, please don’t read if your triggered by abusive relationships, domestic violence, child abuse, sexual assault/harassment, or gore. The outline won't be detailed (and tbh the actual story won't be heavily detailed either) but i believe that everyone still deserves a fair warning :)

The outline doesn't do the plot justice, but it's all I got so hopefully people just Get It.

CHARACTER NOTES:

Canonically, I believe the Sedusa's character was supposed to represent envy and lust. So, one of the main themes I try to stick with when writing her character is the definition of envy, which is a "feeling of discontented or resentful longing aroused by someone else's possessions, qualities, or luck."

PLOT:

Sara is a sweet and mousy little girl, who tries her best to stay invisible. She's rather plain-looking except for her really beautiful long dark hair. Originally, she's not from Townsville, but somewhere in the "country" where a person could be considered a bumpkin. Sara's a smart young girl, but her intelligence is rather unrefined. She spends most of her time obsessing over greek and Egyptian mythology.

She's from a rather big family, but she's the baby. Her father is abusive. Her mother is neglectful and Sara resents her mother for just standing by while abuse is occurring. To cope, Sara dreams of running away and falls deeper into her mythology obsession--specifically Medusa. Sara feels like Medusa would understand her.

At 16, she runs away to Townsville where she tries to be a hairdresser. With no money, she ends up in a really seedy part of town and the beauty parlor she works for ends up being a front for more illicit activities. She still does hair, but really makes her money as a call-girl of sorts. Just one of those girls who gives handjobs in the back to sad old men. It's easy money (I'm pro-sex work lol so I don't make this a big deal, but she's still a minor and it's wrong), but she's disgusted with herself (and men). At this time, she isn't very good at manipulating men--it's more like they have power over her and it reminds her of her father, only making her angrier and angrier.

It is also of note that while she's working at the Parlor, she encounters Sarah Bellum via tv (Ms. Bellum is just an intern with the Mayor at this point). She's instantly fascinated by this other Sarah and forms an odd (slightly toxic) parasocial relationship with her. Sara thinks it's amazing that Sarah went to school and is just so glamourous. Ms. Bellum is really everything Sara wants to be.

*time skip*

Sara falls in love with some jackass. Still slightly obsessed with Sarah Bellum. Still working at the parlor. Sara feels stagnant and worthless. Her jackass boyfriend and a few of his shitty friends end up attacking Sara and cutting off her hair (which was her prized possession). She gets away, but not totally unscathed.

In the process of running away, she bumps into a mysterious man who promises He can fix whatever is troubling her. The mysterious man manipulates an affirmative answer out of Sara and he "fixes" her problem. The man is HIM and he transforms her into the woman we all know as Sedusa (who goes by Ima when disguised).

“And what is it that you want?” HIM tsked, almost sounding bored.

She looked back at the mirror, at her broken reflection and lipstick smeared down her face. With a sore, croaking voice she sneered, “I want my fu-fucking hair back.”

Behind her, the entity smiled, Its facing splitting wide into two, “Oh, now that I can do.”

She watched through the shattered glass how It—HIM—snapped its odd monstrous claw. HIM’s smile grew more grotesque, as a thin bead of sweat began to break out on her forehead.

“This might hurt a little bit,” the entity giggled as she began to hyperventilate, “but what is that you little humans say?" HIM paused, watching her with a tilt of Its head as pain shot through her temples, "Oh, that’s right—”

She gasped and then screamed, dropping to her knees as she clutched at her head. Something wiggled underneath her scalp, pushing harder and harder to break against the resistance of her skin. It felt as if something was pressing against her brain, trying to carve away at her skull.

“—beauty is pain.” HIM growled, appearing next to her so Its voice—now low and baritone—was right in her ear, and It grasped her by the chin forcing her to watch the mirror as snake-like tendrils sprouted from her skull. She cried out at the sight and her body trembled with the pain.

One black, oily, twisted snake after another shot out of a bloody crater on her head. She tried her best through the pain to shake HIM off—to look away—but It held her still with a twisted laugh. She thrashed and howled in agony as the blood poured down her face in rivets. HIM didn't let go. Instead, HIM forced her still, grabbing her by the chin so she'd peer directly into the broken mirror.

Sara paled right before her very eyes, from a peachy skin tone to a white paste. She tried to blink away the tears that wouldn’t stop welling in her eyes—the green of them becoming more acidic with every passing second.

“The fun should be ending soon.” HIM giggled again, Its voice back to a soprano, but she was too forgone to hear him, as her eyes began to lull into the back of her head.

Eventually, when the transformation is complete, we see this:

Sara had stayed collapsed on her knees after HIM vanished into thin air. She stared with wide eyes as blood, sweat, and tears dripped onto and rolled off her thighs. She hardly paid attention to her surrounding, all she could do was listen. She listened to her hair. She listened to the constant moving, living, mass that slithered around her head, neck, and shoulders. The coils almost seemed to be cooing at her, comforting her through her pain, offering sweet apologies for what they had done. They promised her nothing bad would ever happen again. They were a dangerous shield forged from her own body to protect her.

Her body. A vessel for this odd new life.

“Heh.” A deranged giggle escaped her mouth, “Heh. Heh ha—hahaha!” She laughed until her throat burned and tightened, her tears finally drying.

It was instantaneous. It was powerful. Sara had never known love before, but she loved them. She loved every single one of them.

And here she had thought she'd never be a mother.

Sara becomes Sedusa--taking inspiration from Medusa, her childhood fascination. She wonders if HIM knew, but she wouldn't bother asking. She feels sexy, powerful, and unstoppable. Her hair has instilled a new confidence in her and she's finally able to stand up for herself. Soon, she realizes that she's an "exotic" beauty and has men eating out of her hand. She isn't someone who kills, but if she gets bored (or feels threaten) she will.

Things are going good until the PowerPuff Girls are finally created. When she sees them for the first time, she pities them, especially when they're run out of town. She relates to them for not being loved little girls, but is completely shocked when she finds out they've won the town over. This shock turns into resentment and she decides she'll get even with the girls

Then, cue canon. Sedusa seduces the Professor. We see what happens in that episode plus a little more. Sedusa takes out a lot of her repressed childhood trauma on the girls and is plain awful to them. By the time her stint with the Professor is over, she hates them all.

Then, there's the episode with Bellum. Bellum becomes the Athena to Sedusa's medusa. Bellum is still this elevated person in Sedusa's mind, and it only makes sense to Sedusa that she should become Bellum. To become Bellum, Sedusa seduces Bellum and they end up having a brief relationship. (Sedusa pretends to be an intern at City Hall and the two ladies bond over having the same first name). Eventually, Sedusa reveals her plot and the canon events happen. (Bellum is heartbroken over Sedusa).

I'd like to emphasize that Sedusa's relationship with Bellum almost turns her "good," but her hair coils (HIM's curse) prevents her from taking those steps. Her coils prevent close loving relationships--since they're supposed to be shield that keeps people out, preventing any chance that Sedusa's heart may be broken again. [coils represent her inability to heal from the past]

Then we run through a quick montage of her other appearances.

[throughout all of this, I would write how her hair coils are making her more and more insane]

*time skip to after the events of the og show*

This is where my plot can go anywhere. I think Sedusa becomes sloppy, maybe kills a politican. She's spirialing out of control and mad that she can't find any real happiness in her life. I think it'd be interesting to show her interacting with the rrb, not necessarily to show their relationship, but to show how Sedusa would be infuriated that HIM had sons, especially sons who hurt girls for fun ( i.e. the ppg) (a real 'the enemy of my enemy is my friend' moment for her). She's also infuriated at HIM for turning her into a monster, so being mad about his "sons" is just an excuse to get even with the entity.

To hurt HIM, she decides to hurt the boys, but the girls interfere. They won't let innocent live be taken, no matter the person's moral alignment. This infuriates Sedusa even more than HIM ever could. Because again, despite all the shitty things that have happened to the Girls, they are still good as opposed to Sedusa, who ended up bad. She doesn't understand why she had to end up the way she did.

However, the girls aren't the people who finally "defeat" Sedusa. Instead, that honor is left to Ms. Bellum (Sedusa's "Athena"), who Sedusa still very much loves in her own sick twisted way. Paralleling the Sedusa/Bellum episode in the og show, the girls (while protecting the boys) are almost defeated by Sedusa until Bellum intervenes. It's revealed that Bellum had a shitty childhood too (again enforcing the parallels/differences between the two women) and believes that it's not too late for Sedusa to change her ways (it’s a real “I’m rotten work” “no it isn’t. Not if it’s you” moment) In a moment of mental clarity, where the coils (and by extension HIM) cannot affect her judgement, Sedusa releases the boys and the girls. Sedusa doesn't stay though, like Bellum pleads, she gets scared and runs away. (but does tell Bellum she’d always love her, whatever that’s good for)

[also I decide bellum to defeat sedusa to show that the girls are still to young and that adults should be the ones dealing with other adults] [and bellum has a good track record of doing just that]

Idk if she'd be gone forever, but it's implied that she hasn't been seen in Townsville for a long time. What she gets up to is left ambiguous. She can't be good because of her hair coils, but she doesn't want to be bad. idk I don't want it to have a sad ending, but I don't think it can really be happy.

-----

I try hard to play with the concept of beauty, womanhood, purity, love and how negative/positive responses to trauma affect these concepts. Idk it's really rough and needs to be thought out more, especially the end, but I think Sedusa deserves her own story.

[emidori-crossing]

Miitopia, Part 1

This game looked too cute and fun to pass up, so I started on it this past week. I have planned ahead who all I will make a part of my team, what class, what personality type, and even all their war cries.

There were aspects of a few of the personality types that work for me, but I think the airheaded is closest, tbh :P I also want to be as diverse on my team as I can, and I’m def the most airheaded of my other team members.

The wig hairstyle is pretty perfect, and I’m not a fan of some of the hats for this class anyway. I don’t wear blush, but I thought it was a good way to depict that I’m hella pale but also have a ruddy face.

I’m not planning on putting a lot of effort into the non-teammate characters. The villagers et al are just the default the game comes up with. But I thought it’d be fun if these other major characters were ladies, so I did a barebones villain-lady type face for the baddie and named her Maleficent.

In any RPG, I take on a healer role, so cleric was the natural and easy choice for my character. And like I said, the wig works perfect because I’m not crazy about those pope-style hats. If I ever get some hoods though, maybe I’ll remove the wig and be hooded.

I asked my bf what class he usually picks when playing RPGs because I wasn’t sure how to cast him, and he said the thief/rogue class. He also said if it were a RL situation, he would totes choose cleric, but...dat’s mine.

I wasn’t sure if the “lead” hero being a cleric would be the best option, but I got through the solo levels just fine, and cleric and thief make a really good pairing as it turns out, so yay!

The first time I gave Jason money to buy a fun new toy, he wound up returning with MP candy instead. I thought I was the airheaded one?

The second time, he did actually buy the new gear.

AND I GOT A COMICAL SQUEAKY STAFF YAY

I brought Deanna in as the Pop Star. It was an easy decision, because she’s an opera singer and has a great voice. I decided to make her the Stubborn type as well.

The strawberry outfit is cute, but I kinda wish I’d just carried over the stats, because I liked the original purple and white outfit better than this one. Ah well.

I’m realizing I need to adjust our heights more. Jason and I are about 5′6″ and 6′ and Deanna is shorter, but...that looks too short. Especially looking at all the space in those outline boxes, I think I’ll make all of us taller.

Another basic look for this character, but a good opportunity to use the Emidori name.

I tend to give the adventurers smiles, but I though the Great Sage should have more of a determined look.

The final member of the party this round is our friend Sarah, whom I made a Cautious Mage. We haven’t gone adventuring with her yet, so I’m excited to see what she can do!

[multimuse-rp-archived]

So apparently I have 500 followers now?!? I seriously cannot thank you guys enough! I’m so grateful for every single one of you! I never expected this blog to become what it is today. I just... thank you guys so much!

I’m going to do what a lot of other people do and give a shoutout to some specific people - I love you guys so much!

@jaimelannisterthings you were the first person I ever interacted with on my Tyrion blog. I was so nervous, especially because your writing was just AMAZING! But you’ve stuck with me from the start, and I’m so incredibly grateful for your friendship! You’re the best!

@the-stark-queen you are so sweet! You’ve always made me feel good about myself, and your portrayal of Sansa is just... *chef’s kiss* I cannot thank you enough for sticking by my side and being an amazing supporter through thick and thin!

@severityforgreatness you are seriously amazing! I love you and your writing so much! I don’t even have the words to describe it lol. But seriously, you’re incredible and one of my best friends on here! I’m so happy we get to write together and chat ooc!

@rosefromdeath where do I even start? You’re such a talented writer, and never forget it! Anyone who says otherwise is a complete fool. You’re super sweet, and I cherish all our interactions! I can’t wait to keep writing with you!

@boltxnbastard again, I just have to tell you that your portrayal of Ramsay is literally... I can’t even describe how good it is! You are also such a sweet person! Please always remember that your writing is the best of the best! Love ya!

@dumbthink / @hitundo I love your characters so much! I love our interactions, and I love the chaos that comes out of them lol. Honestly, those chaotic threads are probably some of my favorite ones to write because I can just have so much fun with them! Lol seriously though, you’re amazing, and I’m so glad we’ve became friends and interacted a bunch!

@timidstrcngth Peeta and Valerie literally give me so much life! And you’re such a nice person! I’m so glad we can both obsess over our muses and interactions and stuff! Valerie is precious and adorable and I love her so much! Peeta is incomplete without her lol. Here’s to many more awesome and cute interactions!

@amurderbutnotacrime / @wouldntlastfiveminutes we haven’t written together for a super long time, but we have a ton of awesome threads! Not many people write Beth as good as you do! And we all know Rio needs his Beth ;) thank you so much for being such an amazing writing partner! I can’t wait to see where our threads take us!

@dragvnflare I’m not even sure where to start! The way you portray Dany is so amazing, and you’re such a sweet person! I love talking to you ic and ooc. You were one of the ones that has been with me since my Tyrion blog, and I can’t thank you enough for sticking with me always!

@gangfrnd we have barely interacted, but ever since I finished watching good girls, I’ve admired your blog! I was a little nervous to approach you just because your portrayal is SO good, and I was afraid mine didn’t even compare xD but you seem like such a nice person, and your writing is amazing! Let’s definitely write more! Rio for life!

@silvcrignis / @dcusrclicta you are seriously amazing! I love your muses, I love our interactions, and I love our ooc chats! I’m looking forward to more interactions with you and your amazing muses in the future! Love ya!

@thegoodandthegreat you and I can literally obsess over ships and muses and, well, everything! It’s just so nice to be able to talk with someone who’s as excited as I am when it comes to our threads and fandoms and stuff! You’re such a sweet person, and I can’t get enough of our interactions!

@fxntasmagoria okay, I seriously love the way you write Zoe! I can tell you’ve put a ton of thought into her character, and I just think she’s amazing! Then again, all of your muses are amazing lol. I love interacting with you! We haven’t talked too much ooc, but you seem super nice! Hit me up anytime!

@galaxysought you and your muses are so amazing! I love every single one of our interactions, whether it’s with on my block muses, game of thrones muses, or anything else! Speaking of which, I’m so glad you watched on my block! Lol it’s such a good show! Anyway, you’re super sweet and super talented, and I’ll always be grateful for your friendship!

@legends-and-savages I’ve been writing with you for a long time, and you’ve honestly given me a lot of inspiration! I’ll look at some of your other threads and read them, too, just because I love your writing! You’re also super nice ooc, though we haven’t talked a ton. I’d love to write more, so I’ll probably be sending a lot of memes xD feel free to do the same! <3

@betweenthesinnersandthesaints I wrote with you back when you had Brienne on a single muse blog, and I’m so happy you have a multi now! All of your muses are portrayed soooo well! Also, I never thought I shipped Harry and Luna too much, but I do now! ;) hit me up for memes and plotting anytime!

@saltxwolf okay I know we haven’t interacted in a while, but your Theon portrayal is literal perfection! I also just love interacting with you ooc because you’re so easy to talk to, and you’re so sweet! Let’s keep in touch - I’d love to chat with you and write with you more! <3

@gloryxfades / @ladyxredxwolf I absolutely love the way you write Sansa! She’s a complicated character, and I feel like you really understand her! You’re super talented, and I love chatting ooc with you too! Crossovers are always welcome ;) love ya!

@prophecyfated when I first got into reign roleplaying and added my reign muses, your blog was the first I noticed! The way you write francis is just... *chef’s kiss* and I honestly sometimes read some of your other threads just for the quality content! Lol listen, I admire you so much, and I can’t wait to write with you more!

@ladystaarliing ahhhhh you are so incredibly sweet! I love Sarah (especially with Tyrion LOL), and I miss interacting with you! I’ll definitely try to be more active on my tyrion blog from now on so I can send you shippy memes and stuff! They’re adorable lol and you’re such a talented writer!

@villainouspassion where do I begin? I love the way you write your muses, and the way they interact with each other lol. I love it when you post those things about “muse moods” XD I think it’s entertaining to read some of your other threads, too! But listen, you’re an amazing writer, and I’d love to interact with you more again! Hmu for plotting or send memes anytime!

@armandlucienduval / @winewhiskeybloodandchocolate holy shit I can actually tag you! Lmfao. But in all seriousness, you’re an amazing person, and Armand is the best! I can’t get enough of him lol. You can talk to me anytime, whether you’re doing well or not, I’ll always be here for you!

@getlostsqdwrd we’ve interacted a bit. Not overly, but a bit. And honestly? Your muses and the way you write them? Perfection! I can’t get enough of them! You’re also just really nice ooc and a great person to talk to! I would love more interactions, so feel free to send meme spam and/or hmu to plot! <3

@starlessyonder I had so much fun playing among us with you! Our discord group is amazing lol. You’re also a super good writer and a really sweet person! I can’t wait to write with you even more - and kill you in among us lol

@smokedanced we haven’t interacted a ton, but your writing style and muses are so amazing! You’re so talented! I love getting meme spammed so feel free to do it again xD and I’ll do the same for you! Or, if you want to plot, message me! I’d love more interactions with you!

@itwcntsurviveme raven is literally my favorite character on the 100, and I have to say that nobody else can quite capture her voice like you can! I remember being so honored when you followed me back lol. I’d love more interactions with you, so hit me up anytime to plot or send memes! We stan Raven forever!

@reformed-serial-killer damon is such a hard character to write for me tbh, and I often refer to your portrayal of him to help me when I’m not feeling his muse as much! You’ve put so much thought into writing him, and it pays off 100%! You’re extremely talented, and I would love to write with you more! <3

@xchxsingcxrsx / @jxime-lxnnister you were one of the first people to ever write with me on my Tyrion blog, and I love that you’ve continued to stick with me through my vast number of blogs! Lol seriously, thank you so much for being so talented and always willing to try different things in our threads!

@blackroselovesyou you’re so sweet! Whenever I talk to you ooc, you’re always so incredibly nice and open to new ideas/interactions between muses! I love writing with you so much, and I miss the times when we had more threads! Things have been crazy lately, but come to me to plot and/or send memes anytime!

@musenssang it’s been a long time since our last interactions, and I miss you! You’re always so sweet, and your muses are awesome! You’re such a talented writer. Never forget that! I can’t wait for us to interact even more!

@thecrxmxnal we’ve hardly interacted, but I smile every time you pop up on my dash! It’s been a while since I’ve seen the Breakfast Club, but you’re really tempting me to watch it again! Lol. In all seriousness, you’re a really good writer, and I’m really excited for more interactions with you!

@thxwxlf your oc is the literal definition of a badass! I love her! I can tell you’ve put a ton of thought into her character, and it pays off! You’re an amazing writer, and I can’t wait for us to continue to make awesome threads!

@santagabriela I’m really not sure if you’re active anymore, but I couldn’t leave you out! I love your portray of Gabriela, and I think she’s amazing! I really miss our interactions. You’re super talented and really sweet ooc! Feel free to IM me anytime!

@tricksterreformed Gabriel and bobby give me life xD no but seriously, the way you write him is sooooo good! I’ll check out some of your other threads sometimes just for fun! I smile whenever I see you on the dash because you just bring such good vibes! Let’s write more! <3

@damnstory we really haven’t interacted much yet, but I have admired your blog from the start! Your portrayal of Bellamy is *chef’s kiss* amazing! Feel free to message me anytime to plot and/or send me memes! Can’t wait to interact with you more!

I feel like I’m definitely forgetting people lol. But seriously, I love each and every one of you! All of you are welcome to send me memes, reply to my opens, chat with me ooc, plot with me... anything you need, I’ve got you! Stay positive, and stay awesome! Happy writing!

[incredible-dad]

What a man, what a man, what a man, what a mighty good man...

Archetype — The Hero  Birthday — February 18, 1970 Zodiac Sign — Aquarius Sun, Aquarius Rising, Cancer Moon MBTI — ESTP Enneagram — type 2: the Helper Temperament — Choleric Hogwarts House — Ravendor Moral Alignment — Lawful Good Primary Vice — Greed Primary Virtue — Charity Element — Earth

Overview:

Mother — Sarah Parr (nee Johnson) (adopted); Jennifer Peterson (birth) Father — Theodore Parr (adopted); Unknown (birth) Mother’s Occupation — primary schoolteacher Father’s Occupation — pastor Family Finances — comfortably middle class Birth Order — eldest Brothers — William Parr (younger, adoptive, blood child of Sarah and Teddy) Sisters — none. Other Close Family — Helen, Violet, Dash, Jack-Jack; i guess that Helen’s parents are his in-laws but he’s not really close to them because Helen is estranged. Best Friend — Frozone Other Friends — other Supers (mostly deceased) Enemies — The American Government lmao Pets — none, their house is way too hectic, but he grew up on a farm so they had animals there Home Life During Childhood — rosy and idyllic for the most part, his parents were wonderfully accepting of his gifts and even though other people in town kind of shunned him a bit, he won them over for the most part eventually. plus, no one really fucked with him because he could toss you into a building. not that he WOULD but  im js he could. He also grew up quite religious as the son of a southern presbaterian pastor. Town or City Name(s) — Smallville, Kansas; New York City, New York; Astoria, Oregon; Riverside, Iowa;  What Did His or Her Bedroom Look Like — shared with his brother in their little farm house, he wasn’t ever big on decoration or anything, so just whatever his mom decorated it with.  Any Sports or Clubs — no, not officially, he liked to play recreationally, but he wasn’t allowed on any teams because of his powers.  Favorite Toy or Game — loves monopoly, he’s that person that’s really into it and has a whole strategy and everything. He’ll get like MAJORLY competitive and no one really wants to play with him because he takes it really seriously lmao Schooling — his mom was his preschool teacher, and he went to regular rural public school with the same like group of 50 kids up through graduating HS. He got a BA in criminal justice from NYU on a Magick scholarship. Favorite Subject — not really any tbh, not a very studious person, but if he had to choose one he’d probably say science because he finds it interesting. Popular or Loner — he was a loner when his powers first started developing, but by high school he’d practiced really diligently at getting them under control and so he became quite popular after that because he’s very jovial and has a warm personality. Important Experiences or Events — getting adopted, though he doesn’t remember it lol; finding out he had powers; the birth of his brother; getting into NYU; meeting Helen; marrying Helen; joining the NSA; the NSA falling; the birth of Jack-Jack; adopting Violet and Dash Nationality — American Culture — Southern Religion and beliefs — Southern Presbyterian 

Physical Appearance:

Face Claim — David Harbour Complexion — idk white? lmao not super pale, not super dark, no freckles or anything Hair Colour — dirty blond Eye Colour — blue Height — 6’3 Build — stocky and strong Tattoos — none though he always jokes about getting Helen’s name in a heart on his arm Piercings — probably had his ears pierced at one point when he was trying to be #edgy at NYU Common Hairstyle — he’s balding lol Clothing Style — he dresses like a straight white man whose mother dressed him until he went to college and now his wife dresses him Mannerisms — rubs his forehead when he’s frustrated, puts his hands on his hips, crosses his arms, fidgets, sighs when he’s annoyed at you but doesn’t want to say it outright Usual Expression — 

Health:

Overall (do they get sick easily)? — has a very resilent immune system Physical Ailments — none Neurological Conditions — depression Allergies — none Grooming Habits — he wears cologne and shaves and showers, don’t expect much more than that Sleeping Habits — up at the crack of dawn, but not by choice. Grew up on a farm, so it’s just ingrained in him. Can sometimes go back to sleep until like nine, but rarely sleeps in. Is the dad that falls asleep in the recliner watching TV but wakes up if you try to change the channel. Snores. Has to drink a lot of coffee on night shifts. Apparently I have a lot of hcs about Bob’s sleeping habits. Eating Habits — will eat anything, anytime, but Helen’s cooking is his favorite (besides his mom’s) Exercise Habits — eh he’ll go to the gym to keep up pretenses but he has to be really careful, lol. Though, if he doesn’t exercise his strength, it can easily get too amped up, so catch him in the forest chucking trees across the meadows. Emotional Stability — 6; he’d score higher but he has a pretty easily triggered temper. He is easily riled up about things and very passionate, but for the most part he’s pretty jovial and easy to get along with. Body Temperature — runs a little warm Sociability — very friendly, very extroverted, perhaps too friendly, perhaps too extroverted  Addictions — processed sugar Drug Use — none, probably smoked weed in college or something Alcohol Use — not much, will have a few beers with dinner occasionally, but tends not to drink due to his high metabolism it makes it kind of pointless except for the taste and maybe a small buzz if he drinks enough; in college it was a game to see how much it’d take to get him drunk.

Your Character’s Character: 

Bad Habits — not following the rules, being controlling, reacting to situations without thinking Good Habits — loyal, a good communicator when he’s not antsy about things, emotional Best Characteristic — kindhearted Worst Characteristic — obsessive Worst Memory — all the people he’s lost Best Memory — when Jack-Jack was born, when he got married, when he adopted his kids Proud of — his wife, his kids Embarrassed by — his own ineptitude in relating to his kids Driving Style — normal really, not a speed demon or anything; tho he used to be as young person Strong Points — intelligence, friendliness, loyalty Attitude — he’s kind of pessimistic tbh, kind of depressed so he’s always just like *deep sigh Weakness — his brashness Fears — something happening to his family Phobias — lowkey fear of heights Secrets — that he knew about the experiments on the kiddos Regrets — not turning on the NSA faster Feels Vulnerable When — people are pointing out things he has done wrong Pet Peeves — people not listening to him, talking over him, telling him what to do lol Conflicts — his brashness v wanting to take things slow Motivation — to help Short Term Goals and Hopes — none really? Long Term Goals and Hopes — be a good parent, a good husband, and help people Sexuality — straight Day or Night Person — day person, he grew up on a farm Introvert or Extrovert — extrovert  Optimist or Pessimist — pessimist Intelligence — high

Likes and Styles:

Music — dad rock Books — not a biiiig reader, but he does like some history stuff/biographies Magazines — none really Foods — will eat anything but pineapple, but prefers a home cooked meal to eating out Drinks — no preference, will occasionally have a beer w dinner or smth Animals — also no real preference lol Sports — a football fan, will probs get into soccer too, into track bc of dash Social Issues — magick rights, but he’s also Tired Favorite Saying — eh none really Color — Helen’s eyes Clothing — just a regular 50 year old straight man, Helen builds his wardrobe Jewelry — his wedding ring ofc Games — none really, but he’ll get really into playing his kids’ video games with them Websites — none?? Is on the facebook, yes he calls it “the facebook” TV Shows — mindhunters, criminal minds, anything cop related lmao probably like watched game of thrones with helen and other classic tv shows like that Movies — likes comedies best Greatest Want — to protect his family Greatest Need — to let go of the past and heal

[jlf23tumble]

1D Day, Hour Two

The file I’m watching on YouTube is much shorter than an hour (44 minutes!!), but that’s because the poster kindly removed the “VT” (shudder) from random countries (it always boils down to [insert country’s name’s] fans wilding, and there’s only so much of that I can take).

Still, hour 2 is fucking ICONIC for many reasons, the biggest being Harry’s barely constrained rage. Yes, Louis’s “done with it all” demeanor on 1D Day is (justifiably) legendary, but Harry’s right there with him (twin flames, y’all). I can’t tell if he’s coked up, genuinely angry, or just passive-aggressively petty because someone told him he had to speak more quickly, much more loudly, and with some enthusiasm, for chrissakes. Oh, he delivers, all right, so much maniacal shouting. Deets under the cut.

Hour 2 is all Lirry, and I, for one, love Lirry, so it’s 44 minutes well spent. Liam tells us, “We’re kicking it off with VT from  France, give it up for France!” (“FRANCAIS!” Harry yells), and after the missing bit of French VT, we’re back to Lirry, with Harry vacillating between murdering the French language (“Mercy boo coo to France”) and shouting “I ATE SNAILS” as his contribution to what they did in France last time they were there (Liam played football with some guys near the Eiffel Tower, fwiw).

The first guest is Dynamo (or, “DYNAMO, EVERYBODY” if you’re Harry), and he’s here for card tricks and more (“OH, SNAP” is Harry’s response to Dynamo nearly twisting his own finger off, and god, it’s horrifying). Harry’s fairly manic through the entirety of the card tricks, but I love Liam because he’s me in every card trick (“I’m glad mine’s easy to remember because I’d probably forget,” which is true of any card you take, like, ever???):

“WHO LOVES MAGIC!” Harry shouts, and there’s a needlessly complicated special interactive trick that gets introduced here, with Dynamo saying that he wrote a prediction on a piece of paper and sealed it in a box at the beginning of the day, so he needs to Harry to keep the key safe. Points if you correctly assumed that Harry will stuff that key right in next to his dick as a joke.

Because nobody rehearsed or prepared for this epic full-day live event, there are all kinds of problems with the cameras, and if you want a fun drinking game to get you hammered within 45 minutes, take a shot every time you see a variation of this (Liam looking vaguely concerned while Harry aggressively points at the sky or the camera while shouting):

A horrifically bad segment that’s a poorly disguised advert for Google Hangouts (lmaoaoaoaooaoaoa) kicks off questions from all over the world (the audio is bad, none of the visuals syncs), but we get some iconic answers to deeply important questions, like, “If you were in the Hunger Games, who would  survive the longest?” Liam says he’d hide and then kill passersby (yikes), and Harry says he’s more of a lover than a fighter, so he’d hide in a tree until it all blew over. Liam: “Oh, yeah, you’re definitely more of a lover.” Harry: “Easy there, Piers Morgan.”

The next question is from a group of girls wearing Christmas sweaters, which annoys Harry because “it’s a whole month and two days early,” but I think his issues are bigger than jumping the gun on holidays (and honestly, the UK doesn’t have the twin buffers of T’day and H’ween, so you KNOW this is just part of his general rage). Anyway, they want to know what other careers these two would be involved with, sans the D, and because they’re five, Liam says spaceman and Harry says baker.

After a series of horrible glitches, the next question is about which superhero they’d be, and me as Harry, blowing a giant raspberry as he ponders this important question with the level of exhaustion he surely must feel, three years into this band/interview technique. Liam can read the room, so he picks this one up and says he’d be Kung-Fu Panda, which makes it easy for Harry to say Hong Kong Fuey (!!!) or Top Cat.

With that mess done, it’s time to “ROLL THE VT!” (according to Harry) for Switzerland, and because the producers here are nothing if not cliché lovers, that means tiny cowbells for Harry to play with when we come back. He quickly tires of this, throws the cowbells off stage, yells “WE NEED A CAMERA,” and walks straight into the call box with the overwhelmed girls from hour 1. These girls are still weeping, but Harry says, “Thank you for listening to the album, you’re getting kicked out, sorry,” in the flattest voice possible, so good cop Liam hurries over to ask the weeping girls which song they liked and usher in two new people.

“Happily” is debuted, but we don’t get to see it, boo, but we do get ushered over to a theater with some contest winners. Or as Harry says, “We’re here backstage to meet some fans who have won a chance to be here…SHUT UP…in our VIP cinema,” and then, “You’re crying…is that because I told you to shut up? I didn’t mean it.” Liam is there again to save the day, but there are lots of sound problems, so it’s hard to tell what’s happening, tbh.

Anyway, these fans get to ask some iconic questions, such as, “What would we find in your fridge?” which gives us this classic from Harry: “I DON’T LIVE ANYWHERE, SO NO FOOD,” as the audience says, “awwwwww” in the background.

There’s a question from a lady on the screen, saying that she’s in front of the X Factor studios, and she wants to know what they would change their audition song to, if they could go back in time, and because Harry’s well aware of his various stalkers, he says, “I saw her the other day at the X Factor studios, 100 percent” (fwiw, Harry would do “Wrecking Ball” with props, and Liam would do “Mirrors”).

The last question is what they would change if they could go back in time, and Liam says probably his older haircuts, and Harry says that one day in April (and he mentions April again later in the hour, so someone investigate), he had a dodgy breakfast burrito, so he’d probably change that (he also had a dodgy batch of prawns one time, too, but that’s a different story, and god, he’s an underrated comedian). The sound is for shit, but Liam doubts this, prompting Harry to scream, “DON’T JUDGE ME, LIAM, I’M TRYING MY BEST,” and whyyyyyy is he so on fire (and why do I love it so much):

We get back to the studio with an inexplicably breathless Scott Mills (he says he ran…but from where, lmao) and do another spin to figure out who the official 1D account (????) will follow on twitter. Harry starts cheating before people start yelling at him to stop, which is a shame, really, just follow all of these poor bastards, honestly!

We don’t get to see the VT from Germany, but we do get to see Lirry bickering about camera problems and stolen lines, plus an exhaustive rundown of all the thrilling things to come, and I’m so thankful to the person who made this moment a Dua Lipa meme all those months ago:

One of my favorite segments has a really awkward setup, but tl/dr/dw, Harry brags, “I’m a bit of a chef myself, and if I’m honest, Liam, I’m pretty damned good at it,” so we get a “ROLL VT!” and an aggressive finger point, both from Harry, and a silly but charming cook off with the tour chef, who seems like a lovely lady (p.s. look at how glorious his hair was under all those tablecloths…also, he’s chewing gum in a gross way, but this whole bit is worth watching in full):

The cook off is genuinely funny and results in a beautiful pavlova from Sarah and a basic sandwich (with pickle and paprika) from Harry, judged by Mark Jarvis, Gemma Styles, and Lou Teasdale, all of whom Harry bribes. I’m more fascinated with this ring, and my head canon has it either saying ILY or JEN (both of which make me smile):

With that bit over, we move on to more rapping of random tweets, and it’s embarrassing, so I won’t get into that. But the VT of Liam surfing is something special, not only because he looks so obviously happy while he’s doing it, but also because he says some very profound things in the interview around it: “I get followed a lot, so it’s quite nice to get out in the sea where nobody can follow you […] it’s so nice and peaceful […] it doesn’t matter what you look like, you can just have a good time, it’s a bit of an escape,” and ouchhhhhh, that’s some real talk.

We head back to the studio for a fashion segment with Louise someone; a handful of lucky fans in Sweden won a t-shirt design contest, and Lirry are gonna do some modeling. Louise is happy that Harry knows where Sweden is (Harry:  “I got a B in geography…might have been a C, can’t remember”), and some poor shlub working on this trainwreck in the shadow gets dragged out on camera because he’s wearing green jeans, but he’s not there for long (Harry: “GET OUT” *shove*). Louise describes the fashion show to come, and Harry says that he’s quite good at walking in straight lines, but Liam reminds him that he tends to fall over a lot on stage and that the tiny catwalk is actually pretty shiny (god bless Liam for being so responsible).

Luckily for all of us, professional model Cindy Crawford is there to help with some tips (she’s introduced as “IT’S ONLY BLOODY CINDY CRAWFORD” by Harry, and I die with Cindy’s “Hello, boys,” and Harry’s “Hello, Mrs. Crawford”…followed swiftly by Cindy’s, “Please don’t call me Mrs. Crawford”). There’s some sexi modeling, and even though he only wears two shirts to Harry’s three (*and* Harry gets down on the ground to pose), Liam wins, according to the Swedes. He requests a model  off with Cindy as his prize, and he’s surprisingly good?

The last segment is with Dynamo, the magic man, and for some reason, Harry’s weirdly agro about his own shirt mic, like, unnecessarily so, ripping it off to speak with Dynamo before gently putting it back where it belongs. Maybe he’s just frustrated about how they have to use Google+ (lololololol) for a totally convoluted imaginary concert that ultimately doesn’t work (me as him, tbh). 

While Liam does tech support live on air (!!), Harry asks Dynamo to do some card tricks to stall for time after literally nobody says a word when he monotones, “We’re having a technical difficulty…does anybody know any jokes.” Harry pulls a card as directed, but then, for seemingly no reason, he suddenly starts yelling, “THIS ISN’T WORKING, SHALL WE SEE SOME HIGHLIGHTS? HIGHLIGHTS!!! ROLL HIGHLIGHTS [aggressive pointing]!!” and the highlights are truly awful, and I hope he’s enjoying his smoke break for hour 3, jfc.

[iphgenias]

❧ you say wicked like it’s something bad, but you still can’t help but watch me do it ❧

❝ I dream nights and girls like tigers, claws and teeth on both. ❞ LULU ANTARIKSA? No, that’s actually IPHIGENIA ‘GENIE’ ROWLE. A SEVENTH YEAR student, this SLYTHERIN student is sided with THE DEATH EATERS. SHE identifies as CIS WOMAN and is a PURE BLOOD who is known to be PETTY, VINDICTIVE, and UNSCRUPULOUS but also VIVACIOUS, CREATIVE, and PERCEPTIVE. { JANE, TWENTY TWO, NZT, SHE/HER }

here comes the demon

meet genie rowle, daughter of cadfael rowle and deianeira urquhart

in greek mythology, iphigenia is the daughter agamemnon offers in sacrifice —- this iphigenia has no intention of being anyone’s sacrifice, but she’s not opposed to the idea of anyone sacrificing themselves for her

the urquharts have like... this thing of naming themselves after greek mythological figures, but like, exclusively ones with a tragic ending

which.... ya they don’t unpack that fdshjksahj

an actual conversation cadfael & deianeira probably had abt naming genie: cadfael: how about ariadne— deianeira: too happy of an ending cadfael: she got left behind on an island by the man she betrayed her family for deianeira: what’s your point

anyway the rowles go for Welsh™ names usually but cadfael’s whole generation sorta just went fuck that and took other naming traditions, resulting in lo and wes having largely normal names, and then genie’s branch deciding to take her mother’s naming traditions (weird as they may be) & also there’s another branch that married a cornish pureblood and went exclusively w hectic cornish names

probably an only child, though it’s possible genie’s mother is her father’s second wife, and there could be an older half brother (would probably need to be younger than lo, though, who’s 24, and definitely younger than wes, 26) running around, but he’d need to be #Committed to the DE life —- we already have one rowle risking it all as a double agent, and this family (esp genie’s branch) is Too Extra™ to have multiple

genie is spoilt, petty, vindictive and has... pretty much no moral qualms. she’s generous, though, with her friends, and fiercely loyal to her family. 

when she was younger, she had a... rebellious streak might be too generous a term, because no part of her ever felt any inclination to contend with her privileged position, but there was a certain freedom to her position in the family, the youngest of the cousins and a girl —- whereas all eyes were on wes, the heir, the truth, genie was allowed to run a little more wild. nothing not befitting a rowle, of course, for that would not do, but she had more freedom to act as she pleased, to say whatever she liked, to keep her running muttered commentary going during the galas, to suggest wicked plots for her own amusement. genie rowle was always unconcerned with what was fair or right, but she was fun and clever and wicked funny, and was willing to put all her devilish tactics to the good use of entertaining a friend when the fancy took her. children are often vaguely terrible, and these privileged purebloods more than most —- genie was far from an exception, and when she was your friend, she was easy to love for it

hogwarts, though, that’s where the naughtiness thrives

slytherin through and through —- not necessarily a bad thing, but on genie, this looks like the worst thing

most frequently can be found alongside gemma gamp ( g&g! ), her partner in crime, and the rest of the mean girl gang: odilia travers, sarah’s-tbd, maddison bulstrode & leonie-tbd. also often fucking around w people

bullying tw // luvs psychological warfare and the ‘hot & cold’ method, which is what she uses against ppl like isa weasley: flusters her w her presence and prettiness & then calls her by the wrong name and says undermining things to first turn her on and then remind her how meaningless she is! ( viv vc: fuck OFF leave isa ALONE // james vc: ??? constantly amazed by how wrong some ppl are // katya vc: ah, bullying. something new and exciting from my dormmates ) // end tw

but also just. is mean. hot n cold is one fun way 4 her to garner entertainment from ppl but rly, whatever takes her fancy is how she’ll go for it

usually it’s just for fun bc she gets a kick out of it but! she’s coming 4 u annie delacour-bardon for thinking u can move in on gemma’s territory! who cares if gemma didn’t want scor anymore, obvs nobody else could have him either

also she’s part of the DEs, so her various talents are available for their use —- while she is not a leader, she’s part of the same crew as all the current leaders, which suits her perfectly, tbh? she doesn’t want to be a leader... but she does love the clout that comes with being close to them & also using her position to push people to do things to ‘prove themselves’ without them rly having a chance to push her back (ofc, they’re welcome to —- it’s just a) easy for her to prove herself bc like... she doesn’t care abt the well-being of some mudbloods lol and b) given that she’s so tight with the leaders, pushing her to ‘prove herself’ in response to her suggesting you ought to is more likely to cast aspersions on your trustworthiness than hers)

just like wes, prefers getting other people to do her dirty work for her... she’ll do all the psychological stuff and bullying for sure, but she’s less inclined towards physical violence or anything or the like —- that’s more odilia’s or sarah-tbd’s domain? also even just minor things, she likes getting other people to do things for her, it’s a power thing (not her girls — well, maybe maddison — but like... weaker people DFJHSJH)

anyway she’s the fucking worst

the mean girls r demons!

death tw // the rowles are pretty hardcore —- wes and lo are (currently unbeknownst to wes) locked in a war that. well wes is a DE and lo is doublecrossing the DEs so! anyway either lo survives the war w/o being found out or wes is gonna organise her murder when he finds out and he’ll do it by playing the long game, pretending to her face that they’re still fine, all the while plotting her death. SO. that’s one half of genie’s fam! // end tw

the other half are the urquharts, who’re known for obtaining objects for the underground market, particularly historical wixen artefacts. traditionally, the eldest male has been the ‘face’ of the family, being respectable in public and also being the one who handles transactions and makes deals and sells off their findings or obtains requests for them. either a secondary branch or a younger sibling has traditionally been the head of expeditions, sent all around the world to uncover these things for this illegal trade. crime & curse breaking, therefore, have always run in the family.

her uncle, orpheus urquhart, was recently violently attacked (he’s a DE supporter/benefactor in terms of bankrolling things so like.... he’s gross!) & catch her in the lockdown being both outraged ppl would have the audacity to attack him and have room in her naughty self to be absolutely awful to poor yuri

she’s pan w/ a pref for girls, but rly anything goes. uses sex and associated affections for two main purposes, enjoyment & manipulation

nsfw // genie vc: my pussy is a power move // end nsfw

i imagine she primarily considers the mean girls her friends now, but certainly when she was younger, going back to that paragraph i wrote above, there’s like... more room for camaraderie? like w charles, they were friends when they were younger and now... both slythersevenths but she’s a demon! so there’s room for that kind of thing, and also ya sexual situations, and genie is always down to have fucked w someone, which could absolutely be emotionally —- she’s definitely the type to use sympathy/affection/gestures associated w humanity to like... manipulate people

just. the worst

no wonder violet wants to punch her

tragically is the safest / has best chance of survvial & well-being of all my characters, which is so cursed

calls al potter “daddy” bc obvs she doesn’t consider him a viable sexual prospect ( genie vc: he acts like a 90yo man and isn’t even as rich as one??? pass, so boring ) but it makes him way more uncomfortable than it bothers her to think of him as a sexual prospect, so! prime time 4 her

she’s basically awful to everyone the rest of my characters love w their whole hearts, and then she only cares abt the ones they don’t like

she does have this like... not caring exactly but for people like charles, who was her friend once, and the other slythersevenths she considers part of their crowd (esp seeing as the girls hung out w the slytherin sports boys before gemma/scor broke up), there’s a sense of almost. possessiveness? like, she’s not nice to them, but they’re largely hers to fuck with... so watch her be a total demon to vi when varlie happens

anyway i have to be up in 6 hrs so! this will have 2 be enough, sorry abt her, she’s a demon, but i hope she can be helpful 4 plots alongside her other demon besties

[elizabethrobertajones]

Hey so, you've probably been asked this before and if so you can just completely ignore this. But. I know there's been plenty of talk about the differences of Dean and Sam's personalities and families in It's a Terrible Life, but I've yet to seen anyone (as far as I remember anyway) talk about theories of why Sam's fiancé is Madison, and not Jess? Or Sarah? Far as I've come on that theory is, maybe because of the Werewolf thing? And how it relates to Sam's own "demons"? Thoughts?

I like your optimism that I have already been asked all of *the* most obscure questions :D Hehe

The fact Sera wrote both episodes is my first port of call, and Madison would be her own character so faster to mind. I think Heart is also one of her pet favourite episodes although do not ask me how I know that because It’s almost certainly something I read 7 years ago :P 

I would also have to assume on a boring technical level that they were trying to come up with uncanny valley lives, and Dean’s fake life already collected up Bobby and Ellen and Jo, while Sam’s life was deliberately meant to be the less well-developed one because Zach had just thrown together enough to stop him realising the game was up *immediately*, while not bothering to make a complete enough backstory that Sam wouldn’t help motivate Dean because without the much bigger cracks through which their old life came, Sam wouldn’t be able to motivate him in the same way. I don’t think he made many mistakes in the set up except mildly underestimating Dean (while still getting exactly what he wanted out of him by the end of the episode - in the short term, in the long term that’s when Dean gives him the “stab you in the face” warning :P), since he would have been constantly watching them, like an ant farm, and could have fixed Sam if he WASN’T meant to poke at his own backstory. Sam was never really their focus since Ruby had him under lock down doing her side of things and the angels by that point were all aboard on starting the apocalypse.

So I think the last most obvious reason it’s Madison is because Sam was just being mocked as a disposable character, and it really comes across that way when you know the whole story and who set it up:

SAMYeah, ‘cause I only moved here 'cause I just broke up with my fiancée, Madison. But I called her number and I got a damn animal hospital.

And in that sense, Madison is really tragic for us to know was a really awful thing that happened to Sam romantically since Jess, but also has this set up to be mocked and a too-easy joke for Zach. I think if it had been Jess there would have been the danger of him remembering too much, in character, and out of character if the writing process was casting around for a love interest to have a “hilarious” joke from Zach about them, Sam’s girl of the week options are limited and Sarah and Lori from hookman in the first season were both fairly sweet and survived the episode without much interpersonal drama for Sam, while Madison was also very tragic so mocking her and what Sam went through with her, is a very blatant example from the first couple of seasons of Sam being put through the wringer - I think he cried more in that episode than he’s done for the rest of the show since :P There’s much more obvious material to make a joke from than most of his other romantic connections and the only one who he actually cared about (since season 3 had him mostly just being set up for Ruby, while lusting after Bela a little… and honestly at this point trying to think who else Sam has been linked to, the Bad Writer Voice in my brain that comes up with all the junk pile snark suggested that old woman from 3x06 who pawed all over Sam - “But I called her number and I got a damn retirement home.” … So let’s be glad it was Madison :P)

Anyways, if there’s a wider meta purpose you probably got it… Madison is one of the monsters that Sam’s been connected to romantically, and actually Dean seems to think Sam’s got together with a lot more monsters than he actually has because in 4x14 he has some line about what is it with Sam and monster chicks or something, thinking he’s sleeping with the siren (whoops) and he’s reacting to Sam saying he and Ruby are together. Madison is really the only other major example, although Dean also thought Sam had a thing for Ava who he might not have qualified as a monster at the time, but *would* have classified as like finding like if he thought Sam had a crush, since they both had psychic powers and by season 4 that’s all the backstory to Sam’s struggle with humanity. (I mean honestly, Madison seemed to traumatise them both for different reasons so I could get if she stuck out in Dean’s memory even if he seems to tease Sam for it, it would be making light of it as a coping mechanism to the awful stuff they’ve done on the job.)

I’d also get if the show wanted us to think Sam had a bigger history with this than he does - hence the line in 4x14 AND this reminder about Madison - because they like making generalisations of their history to tell the story, focusing on one or two incidents and making it sound like a life-long pattern (despite Jess being Sam’s defining romance and characterised by the normality and that he lied to her about monsters to protect a bubble of normality). We won’t find out about Amy Pond until season 7 aka they don’t write it until then, so it’s retroactively adding to the pattern that was barely a pattern in season 4, but if they want to build up the image of Sam being attracted to monsters as part of the question about his own nature, trying to remind us that Ruby isn’t his first is a good way to go about that. 

Then they end the season with Dean or false representations of him repeatedly telling Sam that he’s a monster or he isn’t human any more and Sam picks Ruby over Dean, and throws his own humanity away blah blah blah we all know the story :P (I say, blah-ing away one of the best season finales on the show.)

… TBH the show trying to set up this narrative that you are what you sleep with just reminds me that in the version of the Winchester Gospels where Sam doesn’t drink demon blood, this is all excellent supporting narrative/examples to build up the ridiculous counterpoint Destiel subtext going on on the other side :P Which is kind of a joke I make but season 4 is told a LOT through their sexual preferences and encounters. If I was going to write a serious academic paper about the show where you don’t need to make the same disclaimers about intent and interpretation as you do on Tumblr it would be excellent to examine season 4′s main arc and plot points as told through the representations of their sexuality, because the Sam/Ruby, and Dean/Cas/Anna major narrative parallel of you are what you sleep with is barely scratching the surface… It’s a huge thing. The siren episode doesn’t just *happen* to be in this season and it’s not a random isolated incident, it’s one of the many ways this undercurrent of the season shows up. And that puts the Sam and monsters subtext directly next to Dean and dudes, which lines up perfectly with playing Sam/Ruby off Dean/Cas for the length of the season. Hey and lo and behold in 4x17 Sam has a history with Madison, and Dean has a hot co-worker he hangs out with, and a deep insecurity about the idea of Sam hitting on him in the elevator (… at work), and some queercoded behaviours, and a complete lack of love life mentioned in the main text, including shoving Jo hard into the sister box in the same exchange we find out about Sam and Madison…

[survivor-tierradelfuego]

Ep. 9: “If you’re not on top, you’re on the bottom & getting played” - Maddison

Maddison

I made the merge!!! Let’s gooo baby!

Aimee

I cannot believe me the oldest person made it to merge! I’m still shaking a little bit to be honest. Haha I always see those reality tv shows where the oldest person is the first boot. Haha and I know there are other 30 year olds but this feels special to me. 

Yay merge! This lady is gonna kick it into high gear, hopefully the alliances I made and the friendships I have started help me to get far but we will see what the future brings 🌅

Olivia A.

I’m excited for merge but not sure if we’ll able to get numbers together and have a majority.

Grae G

We do be merging.... OG maola is in mini Priya so I will be spending every spare moment working my ass off to try and make as many OG Hanuha bonds as possible... 

Najwah

While I'm happy to have made it to merge, I'm actually really sad about James. I've never been this sad about losing anyone in this game before. We started off never having had a one on one chat but we just had each others backs from day one. Stuck it out. Fought together. We spoke on a video call earlier and it was the most easiest conversation ever. He was genuine and kind and I wish him everything of the best in this life. He deserves so many good things. My heart is sore. I didn't want to be here with Amy. She's unresponsive and I don't really trust her. But she told me she had a steal a vote and she wanted to give it to me before tribal because it could be used post merge. And then, she changed her mind like 15 minutes before tribal she was like no this game is a distraction for me and I want to use it tonight. And it was either going to be James or me. She was in a position of power. I think she chose to vote James out coz she has previously stated that he is good at challenges. She wants to have a secret alliance with me. I agreed to it just so that I could be. Kept in the game by her I guess. I have no intention to betray other people I am in an alliance with. Idk. I'm just still shocked. I actually cried about it on a call with Cody earlier. Cody also told me that since day 1 Ben and Zack have been bitching about me voting James out and turning on James and weakening Hanúha Tribe alliance. Like? What? I'm so annoyed. Not once have I even considered voting out James. We had a good thing going. He's just one of the best people in this game and I honestly wish he was. Here. I'm not in the mood for these two faced assholes who only care about themselves. 

Pedro A

im scared ..this can change the whole game

Sarah

AHHH, it’s Merge time! I’m so excited that I, along with most of my alliance, made it to Merge. Definitely sad about James being voted out at the last vote since he was one of my closest allies in the game but thanks for giving me coins and helping me get the idol James! 😊 Maybe Amy has put a target on her back after playing steal a vote and can be an “easy” first vote for the majority of people on our new tribe. Well, there was definitely a lot to catch up on in a week and I talked with Cody for quite awhile last night and he filled me in. He let me know that Ben confided in him and said he didn’t trust Zack fully either. Cody of course hasn’t completely trusted Zack this whole game so at some point, I’m sure everyone will vote out Zack. But for now, our alliance and former Hanuha tribe is staying strong. Like I’ve said, I feel like Cody and I are in one of the best positions in the game because of our connections with so many others. Aimee feels close to me, Najwah feels close to Cody, and Ben and Zack feel close to us. I have also had some communication with Grae and feel like I can talk with her. I do think there is an alliance between Grae, Maddison, Olivia, and maybe Amy though. This next challenge and tribal will be interesting for sure with a 6/6 tribe split. 

Olivia A

At the moment it feels like we’re in the minority (with Pedro still mad abt the John vote) but with this idol and the plan to get everyone to target Pedro I feel like we can get in a good place again. And then convincing people to turn on Zack will hopefully not be too hard.

Maddison

It seems like the boys from original Hanuha are coming after me... and there is nothing I hate more than men chasing me. Time to bring down the hammer. :) I found an idol today thanks to the help of my lovely Rox the Sox alliance. I’m happy to have it in my possession but I’m also ready to use it for whomever in my alliance may need it. I wouldn’t have found it without them anyways. 

Amy A

Made the merge 🎉🎉🎉🎉. Can’t say it has been an easy road. Almost voted out last night. Even though that was not even remotely gonna happen cos ‘Steal-a-vote’. So, definitely happy to be here but sad that I lost my advantage. Also, my alliance with Najwah seems pretty solid. I hope she isn’t just saying stuff to me just to gain my trust and then break it. I absolutely trust her. Even beyond the game. I feel like I can actually talk to her. Let’s go merge!!! Amy A. So, lies. I feel like this should be my little confessional to keep track of my lies cos 😂😂😂😂😂😂 it’s so damn hilarious to ME. I don’t even have a cat but I feel like people seem you as more trustworthy when you have a pet. I also think Grae believes I’m not aligned with Najwah cos I told her I had a mini bond w James instead. This is really entertaining. 

Zack M

"well, i got it." - valerie cherish, the comeback and by it i mean the merge. i'm here. i've accomplished what i wanted to do. now my goal is to make it to top 10. baby steps. but i feel like i'm going to be the first person voted out tbh. something is off with my tribe. the only person i feel like i can actually trust at the moment is najwah. we had like a 2 hour video call last night and compared notes. apparently cody also tried to buy the necklace with her. i'm like 89% positive that him and sarah have the idol. i really wanted to go to final two with him but 1. i don't see me making 2. if i do, i don't think i can fully trust him. it's obvious he is running around talking to everyone and it's starting to get messy. anyways, i think i will be voted out first because it's clear the maola girls are working together. maddison, grae, olivia, amy, kalle all need someone to vote out. why not the guy who was the "tribe leader" at the swap. there may be some hope IF pedro stays loyal and votes with the hanuha tribe but that would also mean that aimee and sarah have to stay with us. aimee apparently told pedro she's been on the bottom which isn't a lie but like why aimee? *face palm* if hanuha stays strong and pedro votes with us then it will be 7 /5 and i should be safe. i would like to pretend to vote amy out (#Justice4James) because i feel like alan may have gave her the idol, if they actually had one like rumor suggests. she plays the idol ... we flush it ... and take out maddison or grae. that would be dream scenario. but who knows what is going to happen with this auction coming up. stay tuned. 

Olivia A

At the moment it feels like we’re in the minority (with Pedro still mad abt the John vote) but with this idol and the plan to get everyone to target Pedro I feel like we can get in a good place again. And then convincing people to turn on Zack will hopefully not be too hard.

Pedro A

OKay so kalle basically said...."I've been on the bottom since the John vote lol....I just don't know who I can try to connect or reconnect with at this point"...so she doesnt trust them anymore....which is nice...and i kinda believe her..considering they didnt pick her to be in the swap tribe...which honestly was a mistake......Grae and Maddison..im coming for you...karma is a bitch

Pedro A

im talking with najwah...i kinda wanna know about her relationship with amy...cause amy is a snake gURL...But i feel like its too early on to ask that...but im watching you GURL

Pedro A

lets just hope we dont self destruct...cause then we will be devoured by the habuha. tribe

Olivia A

Checked in with Aimee and she’s seeming iffy about the original Hanuha people and is still interested in working with me! This is very good news :) If we get Pedro our next and Aimee sticks w us then we’ll have the numbers 6-5.

Kalle N

This first tribal is going to be a gigantic mess. Pedro now says he trusts me and asked me really nicely to not lie to him bc he's sick of being lied to, and it just made me feel really bad. I think rox the sox is still planning on voting Pedro but if I feel like I genuinely have him on my side, I could maybe try to get our alliance to vote for someone else like Zack or Ben. Ben really wants to take out Maddison or Grae but idk how much I want to rely on Ben.

Pedro 

i honestly feel like i noone is being truthfull to me

Pedro A

Honestly im scared...at this point..i just want to make it into the top 10

Pedro A

one step at a time

Olivia A.

For this challenge I’m paired with Cody. I’m not really excited about it. I don’t have anything against him but I’ve never interacted w this man before and I don’t want to help him get immunity! He seems rly nice and funny I just feel like it’s gonna be awkward and also I have 0 ideas. Doesn’t rly matter though bc we’re not planning on targeting him so if he does get immunity it’s whatever. 🤷🤷

Pedro A

Is this  a jokkeeee..I'm with graeeeee .....I'm so unlucky...I'm honestly doneeee..like wtf...what did I do to deserve this ass...gods please help..

Kalle N

I don't know if you're familiar with the show New Girl or not, but it's my favorite show of all time and I'm going to use an example from it to explain how I feel. In New Girl, Nick Miller once said "I'm so sick of the lying... and the manipulating ..  and the out-manipulating". I'm lying and holding so much different info from different people and groups of people that my brain is going to explode. Can't wait to see what Aimee will be like but oof this is getting crazy

Olivia A

I take back what I said Cody’s vibes are immaculate 🤠

Aimee

Haha I’m an idiot. I just sat there at the auction staring at the void. I think I’m still so shook I made it to merge that I just stare into the blankness instead of doing anything. Dang, I wish I would of gotten that envelope. I need that extra vote man. I don’t want that extra going to the Suite life of Zack and Cody. I feel like they are still a big threat to my game even if we are being friendly right now. I don’t necessarily believe in this old Hanuha strong alliance. I’m skeptical, the game of survivor is so complex and I don’t want to play this simple, it has burned me before. With this immunity challenge for me Kalle would be a simple vote to get out now. But now I have to work with her to get immunity. Damn. We will see how this goes. Your lady is gonna to try her best no matter what. No throwing challenges here , in this house. 

Zack M

literally fml. i didn't get anything the auction which i don't care about tbh. but now it's our first INDIVIDUAL IMMUNITY CHALLENGE but we have to work in pairs. individual immunity challenge .... in pairs. i know. seems like kindergarten knowledge that we would work alone but like whatever. i'm partners with amy. she fucked over najwah and james. i hear she doesn't respond and she didn't even complete the last challenge. i guess i will be doing this alone. flashback to high school when i did all the group projects. this is kind of mean. amy could be a sweetheart of a person. she's been nothing but nice to me. and i did reach out to her this morning because her facial expressions during tribal do crack me up. so if you read this amy, know that my frustration isn't with you personally ... it's how you've played the game so far from what i've been able to see. + that our first individual immunity challenge isn't individual at all. whatever. 

Sarah

AHHH, it’s Merge time! I’m so excited that I, along with most of my alliance, made it to Merge. Definitely sad about James being voted out at the last vote since he was one of my closest allies in the game but thanks for giving me coins and helping me get the idol James! 😊 Maybe Amy has put a target on her back after playing steal a vote and can be an “easy” first vote for the majority of people on our new tribe. Well, there was definitely a lot to catch up on in a week and I talked with Cody for quite awhile last night and he filled me in. He let me know that Ben confided in him and said he didn’t trust Zack fully either. Cody of course hasn’t completely trusted Zack this whole game so at some point, I’m sure everyone will vote out Zack. But for now, our alliance and former Hanuha tribe is staying strong. Like I’ve said, I feel like Cody and I are in one of the best positions in the game because of our connections with so many others. Aimee feels close to me, Najwah feels close to Cody, and Ben and Zack feel close to us. I have also had some communication with Grae and feel like I can talk with her. I do think there is an alliance between Grae, Maddison, Olivia, and maybe Amy though. This next challenge and tribal will be interesting for sure with a 6/6 tribe split. Olivia A.For this challenge I’m paired with Cody. I’m not really excited about it. I don’t have anything against him but I’ve never interacted w this man before and I don’t want to help him get immunity! He seems rly nice and funny I just feel like it’s gonna be awkward and also I have 0 ideas. Doesn’t rly matter though bc we’re not planning on targeting him so if he does get immunity it’s whatever. 🤷🤷

Sarah

FUCCKK. I didn’t buy anything in the auction except for a ticket with the VL (which I’m honestly thrilled about that). I definitely thought there would be 10 items, I learned my Survivor auction lesson.... So much has happened in the past hour I- Cody got an extra vote which he told me and then we discussed whether we should tell the whole group or not. I encouraged him to share it because it would keep our Hanuha tribe from getting paranoid at this first vote if they knew we had that advantage. We don’t want Zack to get paranoid and flip... So. Zack messaged Cody about Najwah sharing with him about what the necklace meant. Zack said that the necklace had to be used with an idol and would be like a super idol that can be played after the votes are read. But if Naj holds on to it, she gets a 5% disadvantage each week. Najwah didn’t message Cody about it and he was hurt and didn’t know if he could trust her. Cody asked Najwah and at first she said it was just a cursed necklace with a disadvantage and then later shared with him about using it with an idol. So we have no idea what is the truth and if Zack and Naj are closer than we think... but Zack literally wanted to vote Naj out so I have NO idea what to think anymore. I’m also worried that James shared with Naj he had shared 5 coins with me because they got close and now she may think I have an idol.... asdfghjkl. Cody also wants to start a group of 3 with Ben, him, and I but we don’t know if that will expose Cody and I and if Ben would share that with Zack. Sooo much uncertainty. Merge is CRAZY. 

Grae G

Pedros my partner which sucks for him bc of my disadvantage :///

Najwah

 I'm so happy about having Sarah as a partner in this challenge. Also awesome that I'm able to give people a 10% advantage. So Amy and I are secretly chatting. Initially I was ready to just blindside her and get her out but she's giving me the tea from the inside lmao and we are sharing ideas and hyping each other up and I love that. Pedro started talking to me too and we kinda connected. I told Amy the 10% in giving is for her and Zack and I'm telling Zack it's because I don't want to give Maddison, Grae or Olivia an advantage so Ben and Cody don't benefit from my advantage either. Aimee, Sarah, Zack, Amy and I do however and these are all people I'm willing to work with in the future. I have to play this very carefully. I THINK people trust me right now, but I suspect they're extremely weary. I don't want to be messy so I am sticking to Hanúha, Amy African Queen alliance and I'll listen and entertain Pedro if he wants to talk. He just needed to vent and I really think he's a genuine person. Not sure what he's going to be like now that he's working with someone he "Hates" and is "dead to him" yep my guy is hella dramatic. I feel for him though, I do. It's a game of survivor yes but the constant lying and betrayal affects one psychologically. It's important to still treat each other like humans and be kind. I feel okay right now. I think I'm in an okay position right now. 

Olivia A

I take back what I said Cody’s vibes are immaculate 🤠

Sarah

Cody, Ben, and I formed a three person alliance tonight and I honestly feel really good about it. Cody and I were worried that it might expose Cody and I’s closeness but we both really trust Ben and want to talk through things and work with him. Ben brought up the point of causing chaos at the first tribal so the former Maola tribe can play advantages/idols and we can flush some of them out. I think that will be a good plan. We will get more information tomorrow and then make a decision when we go to tribal. I still haven’t told Ben about my idol yet and I feel like I may but I just want to make sure sure sure that he wouldn’t tell anyone else... After talking with Ben, Cody and I called for another hour and seriously, our friendship goes beyond this game. It’s so crazy how someone can become your best friend in a couple weeks. We obviously want to get to final three/two together and don’t care about voting each other out (if there was a million dollars up for grabs yeah I would want to vote Cody out 😂). We want to go down as the best dynamic duo. 

Pedro A

really GRAE an disadvantge??????....CHILLLLEEEEE....my luck...im literally so unlucky.....anyways lets try to win either way Im so not confidente about this challenge and about the next tribal jeez...this will be a long ride

Cody A

https://youtu.be/cAF4L9RNlHg

Pedro A

me and grae did fine.....i really liked our ideia....i hope the judges like it too......IM SO NERVOUS...after this challenge chilllee...IT WILL be a mess

Olivia A

I’m excited for merge but not sure if we’ll able to get numbers together and have a majority.

Olivia A

Working with Cody on this challenge was a lot of fun!! We’re not in the same alliance but if I’m in a position where I do need to strategically work with him later on I’m confident that won’t be too difficult. Also I love what we made lol. 

Grae g

Amy got immunity which is very sexy Zack not so much but you know he’s not an active target ((yet))

Kalle N

Ok I literally had to make a chart to keep track of which lies I'm telling to which people bc this is getting WILD. Basically, Ben and I are trying to organize a Grae blindside without Grae knowing anything. If all goes according to plan, we have the numbers to make it happen without me even having to vote for Grae, which will make Maddison and Olivia still trust me. We're also trying to get Maddison to play her idol so we're pretending that her name is being thrown out. In order for this to work we NEED Aimee so tomorrow we're trying to pit her against Grae and make her think that Grae is just using her as a number and wants to get rid of her. I also have to keep talking to Pedro and just make sure he doesn't spread any info or find anything out. Bc he could topple this whole thing. I've also told everyone that I have a fake idol when it's actually real, and Grae is the only one who knows it's real. So if we vote them out and they haven't told anyone else, then that secret dies with them and I'm golden. Even Ben thinks my idol is fake. I'M OUT HERE PLAYING 11TH DIMENSIONAL CHESS rn

Zack M

to quote the great philosopher t-pain, "all i do is win win win...." dude. what?! i won the first "individual" immunity challenge?! this is so wild to me. najwah and sarah's was so cute. i want the little bead man najwah made of me. she really called me an #EMOGAY ... love to see it. back to my work though ... look ... was amy my first choice? no. literally no offense to you amy because you were actually a delight to work with because you allowed me to do what i wanted to do. the secret to a relationship with me is to let me have my way. you did and LOOK AT GOD you're safe. i know i'm a threat in this game and the second i don't win i will be in the mouths of everyone ... im including my alliances in that statement. like why would you want to keep me in this game with my track record? i guess for a shield? seems risky to me. i would 100% blindside me. i would like to take a second and talk to one of the judges from this challenge: dear raffy, lord where do i even start. this is an online game of survivor that's happening while everyone is also living real life. i'm not sure what you expected from people but like damn dude ... you were really acting like you were a guest judge on america's got talent or something. make way for TRYra banks. he called himself "a moment" in his bio. let me tell you that no people wait a lifetime for a moment like this. i can't. lol. you literally gave me a 6 for appeal but gave a computer generated buzzfeed quiz a 9. these judges should really have to explain their scores live in my opinion. ALSO JUDGES SHOULD NOT BE PEOPLE WHO ARE DRAFTING PLAYERS!!! now, i'm not saying they are cheating. (please do not edit this out because i just learned that was a thing from najwah. i will share whatever is missing from my confessions on twitter or somewhere if it isn't here when posted.) it seems a lot of this game is "in the family" and i don't like that. it's hard to be unbiased. but back to raffy ... you said i should have included the entire tribe or created a whole deck. sir ... 1. this is an INDIVIDUAL IMMUNITY CHALLENGE that i already had the displeasure of working on with someone else. it should have just been me on that card tbh. i'm tired of having everything comeback to a tribe. this isn't pre-merge. 2. create a whole deck? this was not some copy and paste art project. i did EVERYTHING including writing out the text on the cards instead of typing it out. now that that's out of my system .. jesus .. i don't even know where to begin with the vote. ben and i have decided to start floating maddison and olivia's names around. this will hopefully scare maddison into using whatever her MAYBE advantage from the auction is. let's flush that out. BUT the target i believe is going to be grae. we're not going to share that until later because we don't know if they're are any moles in the group. omg i just thought, what if her advantage is to steal immunity away from a player at tribal. i don't think that's ever been a thing but like maybe on this fucked up online version it could be. you just never know what to expect. hopefully everything goes according to plan and i just get to chill and see where everyone stands in the game .... and then i win again next time. 

Pedro A

I dont like that Amy came to talk to me.....seems suspicious...expecially because amy and najwah for sure have an allience...LOL.....i dont even know what to say..........i think im going tonight...maybe im just being paranoid....But i have this feeling....and hey its my 3rd tribal....3 times its a charm LOL

Amy A

So my little alliance with Najwah is brewing 😂. We’re super close and tell each other everything and I think this is the best move I’ve made since the game started. Also, I won immunity 🎉. Najwah’s advantage really helped. Cos that’s what boosted us. Unless no one tells me she’s the vote, she’s NOT going home tonight. I feel really great for tonight’s tribal and can’t wait to see what’s next.

Pedro A

but im 95% sure najwah..and amy are working a together...like amy came to talk to me...while najwah was online....and it seemed like shes was comparing notes ..to what i said to najwah lol

Pedro A

it feel like Najwah came to supervise me and to get me to throw out a name...LIKE GURLLLL...you think im stoopid?....I HAVE A BAD FEELING...i think its me tonight...chilleeee...which is dumb tbh....cause theres bigger fish...

Pedro A

I feel like najwah...doesnt trust me........like shes always...suspicous of me ...i dont like that....like im paranoid...but she is AN INVESTIGATOR 

Pedro A

IM going homeeee FUCKKK

Pedro A

Theory confirmed...CHILLEE...kalle told me....and Grae, Maddison, or Olivia, are planning to vote my ass out...like gurl....and apparently the other tribe was also considering voting my ass out also...wtffff...IM AT ROCK BOTTOM...and im not even playing both sides...i just want grae maddison and olivia out LOL

Pedro A

Grae´s ass better leave...i worked so mf hard on that challenge...and got a disadvantge from them ...and now they are trynna vote me out...LIKE chillleee wtf

Maddison

I! Still! Want! Pedro! Gone! Also hi Zack you’re the clear ringleader but you’ll be knocked out soon enough my guy

Olivia A

Hiii so it’s looking like we’re going for Pedro. I think we have a solid 6 and hopefully 7 if we can get Aimee to get Sarah in with us. This vote feels really important bc it’s gonna establish who has the majority. Although, anyone could flip at any time. WHO KNOWS!! 

Kalle N

So last night I was stressing and now I've actually decided to just pass away. This is getting insane. I told Pedro about the Grae vote and he's in, I just have to babysit him and make sure that he doesn't say a word about it to anyone. We also NEED Cody to use his extra vote. I need to throw away my vote on someone that Amy could vote for bc I'm gonna have to throw blame on her after this if this actually works out. The lying is really getting on top of me bc I have to say different things to different people but here we are. Very big tribal tonight

Maddison

I wish some people would realize that if you’re not on top, you’re on the bottom & getting played. 

Amy A

The votes are a MESS lemme tell you! The names are Pedro and Grae. We’re tryna use Cody as our decoy vote. The actual mess is in who we’re gonna involve and everyone tryna downplay their closeness to people on the other side. OG Maola tea-time seems to be working well together and have all agreed on Pedro. Maddison has taken a step back from the aggressive role cos I think she has seen that it’d make her a target. I honestly wouldn’t mind voting her out someday because she’s GOOD. I just want us all to get through this tribal and see where the lines fall. 

Amy A

Najwah is an actual rockstar 😂😂😂. She and I are basically a tag team at this point. Our private messages are actually lit. Nothing is off topic and literally everything I hear, I tell her. The best part is always blaming the things I know from her from our Palena swap tribe on James. I always say ‘James told me ...’ and it’s HILARIOUS. People may have doubted at the beginning but I think that now, no one even thinks we work together. We nicknames Zack and Pedro ‘Dynamic Dúo’ and I basically love her. She’s my spirit animal. 

Olivia A

Hiii so it’s looking like we’re going for Pedro. I think we have a solid 6 and hopefully 7 if we can get Aimee to get Sarah in with us. This vote feels really important bc it’s gonna establish who has the majority. Although, anyone could flip at any time. WHO KNOWS!! 

Olivia A

The vote is still Pedro but our fake-out vote is Cody. I completely trust the people I’m working with but I’m getting a gut feeling that this isn’t going to work out in our favor. Just bc the numbers aren’t quite secure yet. But I’ll just stick w the plan and stay hopeful :/

Kalle N.

kinda bummed we didn't get to pull off the Grae blindside tonight and give Pedro the idol that no one knows about :( But I'm more bummed that Zack was treating anyone the way he did so good riddance I guess. The PB & K alliance is hopefully going to be the undercover move making force that we need to keep our momentum going forward. Unfortunately I do have to work with Ben for right now since I'm definitely on the bottom of my other alliances. It'll be interesting to see what happens next

Pedro A

SOOO this was a mess....i was going homeee tonight.........this wholee situation saved my damn lifeeee.....lets hope this was only a situational thing....and next round is someone different....i doubt it...but still......im so shocked about zack...also can i say that my nº1s change every elimination ..like now its kalle and ben ...i trust them..they had my best interest in mind....im sorry to whoever is reading this...i dont like making long texts in english..and im not good with essays.. SORRY

Aimee

I’m not sure where I left off in my last confessional lol so I’ll start here It was a lot of fun working with Kalle on the coloring and poem projects. I really liked her haiku and her originality of it. I hope she becomes more confident in her creative writing. I’m happy that we got 3rd overall. This morning I heard Grae’s name get thrown around. Haha I literally almost cried when I heard that. I’m not normally an emotional person but I feel like Grae and I have such a special connection and I don’t want to lose it so soon. They are a joy to talk with everyday and I might honestly have a little crush forming. ☺️😅 Their energy matches no other that I talk to in this game. 🤩 It was so nice getting reached out to by Grae and Maddison on how they wanted to vote Pedro out. It was such a relief to finally get included in a vote. I am working closely with Ben in this game. Our main thing is that no one can know we are working together so that we can hear information from all sides of the game. He is someone that I can spill my guts to about ANYTHING game related and I know that he is in it with me for the long haul. There’s so much we know about  each other that it’s almost impossible to betray each other without burning each other to the ground! Not that I would want to! He is such a sweetheart and I love him to bits! Haha it’s hard to keep track of the days at this point. We video chat a lot and I really enjoy his company! I’m happy we both made it to merge and together we can turn this game upside down. Sarah and I call ourselves Team Casanova! The flash game queens! 👑 I love talking with her about outside of the game stuff. It’s was so great having her on Maola with me and now merge. We have built such a strong relationship and I really think she is someone I can trust through the end!!!! I really enjoy Maddison too. She seems so down to earth and easy to talk to. I’m glad she sees me as an ally and am excited to see how far she is willing to work with me. Shout out to my girl Najwah! I had no idea what all she was going through and I’m so happy that the emotional threat to her well being is out of this game. She is such a gem and I hope we get to work together more in the future. I’m honestly happy Zack is out of the game. I don’t enjoy hearing what all he was saying about contestants and the host. This game is meant for fun. I hope with him being out the game will be less stressful for us all. I’m just so sorry to hear about what people on my old Hanuha chat had to go through, it sounds even worse than how I felt about things. It breaks my heart and I’m relieved for this reset in the game where we can all air things out and come together. I love everyone here and I’m so happy Jay has decided to recruit me. These friendships I have made and continue to make have been such a joy this summer. Your lady is strong and I will keep fighting for that immunity. ✌️

Najwah

these past 24 hours have been the craziest ever and I have experienced a whirlwind of emotions, all while forgetting to eat, barely sleeping ans having not got out of bed today. Let me start from the beginning, hopefully I remember it all. Let me grab some snacks too. So it started with our first reward challenge. The auction. zack immediately asked me what I got and everyone else were sharing their bid items in the old hanuha group chat so in a panic, I told him. In retrospect, I should have lied. Anyway, zack made me doubt my trust in Cody so i decided not to tell Cody the truth about the necklace, i would learn that zack had told cody about my necklace almost immediately. But more on that later. Anyway, in a panic, i told ben too. lmao. Why? who knows? But i suppose it was an opening and Ben and i Could talk for the first time. Why am i writing this at 12 am on like2 hours sleep? who knows? Okay so then the reward challenge comes up and I am paired with Sarah. I end up having the best day ever. I had so much fun creating and chatting to sarah. We just spoke about life, absolutely nothing game related. For the first time in this entire game, I felt as though we could actually WIN and for the first time, I was having THE BEST DAY. I gave each of my 8bit survivor characters little haikus. It was funny, if i say so myself. Me? I love my silly humour. Okay this page is cutting me off I will write these in parts. 

Najwah

Before the challenge due date yesterday, Cody messages me and of course I am pleasantly surprised as I have felt like things were a bit off between Cody and I since merge happened. He said he wants to call and it ends up being one of the most emotional calls i have had in a while, even in real life. Through our call, we realised that we have basically had the same gut feelings about zack and his behaviour for a while now and we spoke about how zack has been trying to pit us against each other, how controlling and jealous and manipulative he is. We basically realised that the reason we have been so mentally exhausted was BECAUSE of Zack's paranoia. zack spoke so much game. we were constantly being bombarded and had our trust and loyalty questioned and he thought nothing about throwing My or Cody's names out. All of this just validated and reaffirmed our feelings towards Zack and we decided there and then that we would vote Zack out ASAP. As we were talking, the reultsof the challenge were released and lmao what are the chances that FRIGGEN ZACK WINS IMMUNITY URGGGHHHH. We were reeling and i so much wanted to decompress with Cody but then I had my meeting with the VL draft people so I had to reframe my mindset. Bare in mind that this is all happening at 4am and im under the blankets, with a warm bean bag because it is freezing out. NajwahI actually loved my conference call with Ellie, Raffy and Tim. What awesome people. I wish i wasn't as distracted or could articulate better because I feel as though my mind was all over the place but i also took the opportunity to ask for their advice and guidance post my call of revelations with Cody. It was still fresh in my mind and they gave me some GOOD pointers. They also told me how I should approach the game moving forward. I loved how they all had such different approaches. Raffy made me laugh so much. They told me how to deal with Zack too. So some other ish went down after this call. 

Najwah

Cody calls me and is like "lets get on a three way call with Sarah" After gushing about how much we love each other and how we have been on the same page for such a long time, Sarah throws an idea out that sticks. WHY NOT VOTE PEDRO OUT TO ISOLATE ZACK SINCE WE CANNOT VOTE ZACK. And we spent a lot of time freaking out and laughing about how we are going to do that. Cody was frustrated that everyone just assumed he and Zack were a duo and I said its because "Zack and Cody" to which Cody replied "Well this definitely aint the sweet life." Later I suggested that we call the group Mr Moseby and Cody said it was perfect as Zack was the bane of Mr Mosebys existance. Everytime i think about it I laugh. We spoke until my battery died, which was around 6am. I didnt sleep much because I was tasked to get a name out of pedro. I think i was messy there because Pedro accused me of being acting "like a supervisor and demanding a name from him like he is a ring leader" and honestly, it made me laugh so much. He is so dramatic I can't deal. Anyway, he knew what I was trying to do and he called me out and I apologised and honestly felt bad about the whole thing. In the end, I am happy we didn't vote him out. He has loose lips but he is very honest and I like that.

Najwah

So i feel as though there are so many things that happened simultaneously today. Amy L and I are working together on the side, she gives me all the ex maola tea. She told me Maddison has an idol. I haven't used this information yet and I won't now because it will raise questions. I told her that some of us are willing to vote Zack. The funny thing about our chats is that Amy keeps saying we need to share this tea with the VL. Any bit of information I have ever given her, she tells her tribemates she got from James lmao. And whenever I talk about her, I use James and Ryan too. Our alliance is so low key and its such a safe, unpretentious space. We have the best chats and we just spill tea for information's sake. Neither of us are going to use any of the tea. It's great having an in. 

Najwah

So all day Zack has been bitching about jay and Raffy and the judges and honestly, I can't even remember what else. It was as though he got a kick out of being verbally abusive. I think he watches too much trashy reality TV, there is a difference between sassy and just plain rude. I also felt that many of his comments were borderline misogynistic. also, whatever information I have given him, he used against Jay. Today was a blur and also intense and also exhausting. I went with Cody to a mall, to visit his friend at a military base, drove around with him, chatted in his room while he was drinking a whole bottle of frozen coke. Like we spoke so much and it was just Zack's constant bitching and paranoia getting to us? Like? How does one person make so many people feel uncomfortable. Cody got on a call with Ben and told him that we had been trying to vote Pedro out and ben went ballistic and said that i am being manipulated by ex moala, he didn't know that we all wanted Pedro out. It made me mad so I called Ben too and asked him why he keeps thinking I want to flip? But he gave me his word and I guess that should mean something. Today was especially exhausting because I had to pretend and entertain Zack until we voted him out. I hated every minute because usually if i find out people talk shit about me, I either talk it out or just not talk to the person at all. I couldnt do that with him. I needed him tio feel safe with me in order for us to pull of the pedro blindside. I wanted to see the look on his face when he realised wtf had just happened. Am i sad that I didn't get that satisfaction? yep. 

Najwah

Do I feel Zack should have been removed? Honestly no. I don't agree with it. I think we should have worked with everyone else and voted him out. I genuinely don't think he is a horrible person. In all honesty, I wish we could have met outside this game. I feel as though the game wasn't good for him. Not that i'm trying to justify his actions but I feel as though he got too invested and was too emotionally unstable. Most of us are here to have fun. Sure, it would be nice to win but at the end of the day it's not real life and I would much rather preserve the friendships and connections I've made in this game than win. Winning is nice but it isn't everything. Am i worried about Zack and wonder whether he will have a setback of some sort? Definitely. He has spoken about his crippling anxiety numerous times, which he has also projected time and time again. 

Najwah

So Cody feels bad and blames himself for all of this. I don't blame him. I feel bad too. I thought I would feel some sort of relief with zack gone, but it is just guilt. I mean the messages were still sent in confidence and I feel bad for violating his privacy. I also feel bad for entertaining him because of the game. I don't want to be playing so hard that I go against my values. It just feels weird with zack removed. Like he wont be on the jury. I can't stop wondering whether he is okay, as a human to another human. My husband says that the Russel Hantz of Tierra del fuego got removed. It made me laugh a little. He is a survivor super fan too so he is very invested in all of this. Sigh. I may have left some stuff out because its so late and just A LOT has happened but I will keep confessing as I think of things or remember things. Oh lol Ben said he would voted Zack out in a heart beat, Basically we all felt the exact same from the beginning, no one wanted to speak out in fear of being targeted.

Olivia A

The vote is still Pedro but our fake-out vote is Cody. I completely trust the people I’m working with but I’m getting a gut feeling that this isn’t going to work out in our favor. Just bc the numbers aren’t quite secure yet. But I’ll just stick w the plan and stay hopeful :/

Sarah

From last night.... https://youtu.be/EirlyVVXDKk

Ben Kessler

Today was eventful, so I will skip to the end. Situationally, I believe I am not in a good spot at all. There are 11 people left, Pedro will receive votes next tribal, but I would like him to stay. My former tribe it seems as though everyone is closer with others than they are with me, except possibly Aimee but that's a stretch. Today could potentially crash my game. So, what do I do? Hope is not strategy. Tomorrow, I talk to others. I ensure everybody knows how close people are. I play double agent. I make sure I am at least in important conversations to merely be there. I let people know I want to be with them in a group setting. I re-establish that I am here to have a good time. At the end of the day, this both is and isn't monopoly. Strategy is involved, but the rules aren't as specific. You don't know how much money or property people are holding. Situationally, though, it is the same. You work with the hand you are dealt and I intend to make the absolute best of this hand. People will do what they want for a variety of reasons, so I need to let things roll off my shoulders, read, and react. To end this long confessional, I am not hoping for anything. I will be doing things to affect change. If I see it doesn't work, I lay low. Read and react.

Maddison

the pink house has become my safe haven. i shall inhabit her until i can no longer. thank you, pink house, for the many blessings of coins that you have given myself and my allies.

Pedro A

Okay...so i think grae maddison and olivia are voting me....and everyone else is voting maddison (if maddison doesnt use her ring)...and im voting olivia and using kalles idol....idk at this point 2 hours till tribal..and anything can change

Sarah

Plans keep changing every minute but as of right now going into this first Merge tribal, the plan is to vote out Maddison because it seems like Maddison, Grae, and Olivia want to vote Pedro so if they vote Pedro and the rest of us vote Maddison we may could blindside her and we could get an idol out of the game. If she plays an idol, then Pedro still goes home and original Hanuha is saved... but if Pedro wins immunity, of course we will have to rework everything. We may be able to do 4 for Olivia and 4 for Maddison .

Aimee

https://elysiankardia.tumblr.com/post/625017490490179584

Is this really happening? Am I going to vote for who I ACTUALLY want to vote for for once, as a treat? And I getting what I want...and controlling the vote?! Am I in the twilight zone? The name of the game now is to get all of my potential final allies to get along with each other and play nice. My hand is in so many cookie jars I have to be careful, all my relationships trust each other. I already have an army ready to strike if anyone tries to turn on me, and I was forming those relationships genuinely and BEFORE I needed them to come through for me, not last minute where trust would be harder to earn. I literally am running this vote off of Grae and Maddison and onto a different target. Hanuha is so deadest in getting one of the “core three” out and this is the best I can do to protect those two but also not flip on people who I trust from my original tribe. For DAYS they have been so afraid of Grae and Maddison and I’m put in massive work to divert that away from them. My plan is something right down the middle, where I get to have my cake and eat it too. I love the best of both worlds; I’m Hannah Montana!

Maddison

Tonight is going to be a big one. I’ve heard my name and I really don’t want to go home with an idol in my pocket. Better safe than sorry? Olivia AI really hope this vote works out I’m NERVOUS!! Also, I worked really hard on this challenge so getting the disadvantage when I had 2 puzzles left was shitty but I don’t really need the immunity anyway. Still felt really good to finish it out regardless of if I win. :)

Sarah

Plans keep changing every minute but as of right now going into this first Merge tribal, the plan is to vote out Maddison because it seems like Maddison, Grae, and Olivia want to vote Pedro so if they vote Pedro and the rest of us vote Maddison we may could blindside her and we could get an idol out of the game. If she plays an idol, then Pedro still goes home and original Hanuha is saved... but if Pedro wins immunity, of course we will have to rework everything. We may be able to do 4 for Olivia and 4 for Maddison . 

Amy A

Tribal again and with it, ALLLLLL the drama. So I have made a ‘vote four’ alliance w Kalle, Ben and Pedro which is supposed to be secret. Which makes it two secret alliances I’m a part of 😂😂😂😂😂😂. The alliance w Najwah is definitely the one I’m most loyal to but Pedro and co seem like a really solid group I can work with. I didn’t think I’d win immunity so there’s that. About tonight’s vote, the new ‘core four’ is aiming for Grae but in order to keep the alliance a secret, only Pedro will vote for her. It’s all exciting stuff and I KNOW tonight’s tribal is going to be THE ONE. Cannot wait. 

Olivia A

I really hope this vote works out I’m NERVOUS!! Also, I worked really hard on this challenge so getting the disadvantage when I had 2 puzzles left was shitty but I don’t really need the immunity anyway. Still felt really good to finish it out regardless of if I win. :)

Aimee

Nooooo I didn’t need Olivia to win immunity. That way she is one of the “core 3 Maola” out. Oh man I don’t think I can save my game and Maddison at the same time. I got the target off Grae after merge happened. I worked so hard for that so this all wasn’t for nothing. There’s like fifteen minutes before tribal and I’m still not entirely sure what is going to happen.

[ts-hvv4]

EPISODE FOUR: “I JUST NEED ME AND MY GIRLIES TO SURVIVE.” - JAKE

I'm jumping ship because Keegan voted for me TWICE!!! Bro I'm like Kelley Frickin Wentworth, I'm gonna underdog this game. Heck yeah I'm joining Andreas, Chris, and Dennis. 

The word of the day is definitely Tinky Winky. It’s a Tinky Winky revolution and all because I couldn’t get the fucking epic rap battle line “we’re in the endgame now Tinky winky” unstuck from my brain

Literally all my best friends are on the other tribe UGHHHHHHHH Sharifa, Trent, Kurt, Lukas we will be together at some point 😞✊ And Jake tbh imma miss him I have ned, Keegan, and Malik Ned doesn’t like malik Keegan thinks I voted ned Malik would’ve been voted out if he didn’t have immunity Sitting in a burning room with a teaspoon of water but ILL GET THROUGH THIS I PROMISE

I imagine Olivia, Trent, and Keegan as the episode 2 trio of Jamal, Jack, and Molly from Island of the Idols, specifically the line "we're really impressed with ourselves." They think they're playing some mastermind UTR game but in reality literally everyone knows their schemes.

Sooooo I received a vote and it was likely from Kage so that’s annoying… BUT here are my thoughts on the swap

1) I think Lukas told Kage I was trying to get him out. The way Lukas talked to me about Emma and the way he talked to me about Kage were very standoff ish. He was clearly trying to get info and just say things that didn't give anything either way. It was a very different feel than what I got with anyone else. 2) I think there's a winners alliance between Jake, Sharifa, and Kurt. Jake told me he got along well with Sharifa and Kurt. So clearly he's hoping we target Trent. BUT Also Sharifa knew I was a winner when I talked to her and made a point to bring it up. Yet, when I asked if there were other winners she mentioned Kurt and not Jake. That doesn't make sense. She doesn't know me at all. Why would she have that info about me but not have that info about Jake? 3) I think I'm losing Lukas a bit. Before we swapped Dennis told me that Kage mentioned something about the idol no longer being where it was originally. He also mentioned that Kage told Lukas. Me and Lukas had been sharing idol information but Lukas hasn't been coming to tell me things and he DEFINITELY didn't tell me the Kage info. Now that I've said all that, I wanna debate whether or not to tell anyone about the 5 that was created on our old tribe. Dennis might not enjoy it cause it would throw him under the bus. But he's no longer on my tribe. I could use this opportunity to inch my way into the winner's alliance and surround myself with threats. Get Lukas closer to me and make him a bit more sus of Kage. AND get Matt closer to me as well. My relationship with Sarah is interesting and I think it'll stay that way. I think we've been getting along nicely but I don't think she's actively going out of her way to work with me cause she likes me. I think at best, she wants to just get info from meAGAIN, all this said, one of the BIGGEST things I've learned in the past is to trust my perception. In both real life games I've played, I had a gut feeling about all of the important things in the entire game. I knew when things were happening that were shady and was able to sus it out. BUT in both, I waited too long to act on it and tried to logic my way through issues rather than trust myself. So I genuinely think what I'm feeling about all these relationships makes a lot of sense and I'm trying to really figure out what I should do with the trust I've built. I gotta a lot of ground to make up cause of my vacation and I can feel my relationships slipping. Jake and I rn are really close. As outside friends, I trust him to work with me for a while. He’s giving me lots of info and even shared an idol clue with moi And honestly, the only person I would care to push to go home rn is Kage and even then I don't necessarily think it's smart to take him out yet 

This was actually a good swap! Me, Andreas, and Dennis are in the minority, although I felt prepared that it would go this way! I talked to everyone and actually think all of them are cool BUT Matt claimed that Olivia told him Malik was the target on their tribe had he not gotten immunity and Sarah I believe said do not trust Olivia so I want to capitalize on that somehow! Also Malik and I know one another so that's cool! But we must downplay!

Just survived the double tribal. It was way more stressful than it should have been, but thats just because of my paranoid self. I had a 1/6 chance of going home, but luckily i didn't receive any votes. There were two rouge votes on keegan who was in my alliance but jake admitted that he and ned were the votes because they both got scared they were the vote and wanted to protect themselves in case of an idol. I thought for a split second there was a much bigger alliance controlling the game and I just got played. But luckily that didn't happen. Now comes a much harder part of the game. We swapped into our original roles, classic Heroes vs Villains. This would be fun expect for the fact i'm now in a 5-4 minority.  I'm going to have to work extra hard to not get voted out, but if they choose me, theres not much i can do unless i find an idol. Lukas I sorta knew threw olivia and she was hoping all three of us could work together, so i'm hoping he can protect me a bit. NIcklas I played BB pokemon with. We were never on the same side in that game, but hopefully theres so some sort of connection there I can use. Sarah Lynn also played that but she was inactive and first boot and I dont think she remembered me. The other two i just met for the first time last night. It's going to be tough to survive, but hopefully we dont even have to go to tribal.

To absolutely no ones surprise, we have swapped! But before I get into that, let me just unpack a little bit that happened at the last tribal because I am SHOOK. So the plan was for there to be a near unanimous vote for BIRCH. With Olivia throwing an extra vote on NED just in case BIRCH had an idol and was lying about who they were voting for. All is well and good. But then tribal happens and not only does NED get two votes but I get two votes. Record scratch. Hold up. What the absolute fuck? I genuinely though I was about to be blindsided and sent home pre-merge. So the end result was five votes for BIRCH, two for NED and two for me. In the brief chats I had before we actually swapped, as well as after with OLIVIA, MALIK and NED, it appears that it was KURT and JAKE who wrote my name down. Fair enough I guess, I hardly spoke with them at all this round. But it was still a shock. As far as I can tell, the McBITCHES all stuck together with the plan. SHARIFA, TRENT, MALIK and myself voted BIRCH with OLIVIA sticking with her NED vote. BIRCH definitely voted for NED and I’m pretty confident NED voted for BIRCH which definitely leaves KURT and JAKE as the two who voted for me. Which means they are close and working together. So that’s definitely something to keep in mind. In regards to the swap it is now a true Heroes vs Villains season and we swapped into those alignments. Which honestly I am okay with because I’ve got OLIVIA with me, who is probably my #1 ally at this point. I’ve also got MALIK who I trust a great deal. And NED, well NED I’m still working on gaining his full allegiance to me. ANDREAS, CHRIS and DENNIS are the other heroes from the original Molysmeno tribe. So far they’ve been nice and I’m bonding with CHRIS over horror movies so that’s been good. However, because of the late tribal we didn’t get a whole lot of time to talk last night. Moving forward, I’d like to win immunity challenges for sure. As much as I would hate to lose TRENT or SHARIFA on the other side, I don’t trust that OG AMMONIA will stick together if we end up at tribal. And who’s to say one of ANDREAS, CHRIS or DENNIS doesn’t have an idol and idols us out even if we do. I genuinely would like to stick with OG tribes for the time being though. As of this very moment, ANDREAS I think is who I would prefer to vote out right now. He seems to be the most difficult to actually talk with at the moment. But it’s still very early in the swap so we’ll see how things progress. 

So I feel that everything is coming together. Andreas/Dennis have told Malik on the Olivia stuff and he was hurt but it is going to have him come to us. While they think Malik's going to be all for them, there is a good chance he and I can snipe! Meanwhile Malik and Ned have expressed a little concern about Olivia/Keegan. I think my ideal tribal scenarios are 5-2 or 3-2-2 so stay tuned on THAT 

Today I've spent lots of time thinking about my odds in the game while at work and tbh I feel like I can surprise a lot of these people. For me, a lot of them want to play under the radar or downplay themselves, but I feel like perhaps the fact I am so new I can legitimately do so without it not looking suspicious and unbelievable. Someone like Matt or Sarah or Dennis or Ned or whoever I feel will have a hard time with that- at least I hope they will. So yeah. Still, I enjoy so many of these people that I feel if I do lose, then I certainly won't be sad about it! Having that said, I'm here to win and plan on doing so!

The swap happened as expected after Emma left. If Emma had stayed, this swap would've been a mess and a half, but she didn't and Kage (the rogue vote) prolly put himself really low into that swap. The swaptribe is amazing. Thanks to Matt's info, I was instantly able to form a really good relationship with malik, who didn't necessarily know he was on the outs, but is SO easy to talk to. He also seemed so so sad when I told him Matt's info, like literally heartbroken and I felt so so sorry for him :(. Ned also approached me about him being on the outs and even being close to Malik, so that is good... right?! Olivia and Keegan seem really nice, but we swapped into a Minority, so I will have to work every angle I can. There are a few concerns I have and those are mainly based on the fact, that things seem way way WAY too good and this just can't be?! I do feel like tho. My connections to Malik and Olivia would EVEN if they stick together mean, that I hopefully don't get targetted and that is actually my entire premerge strategy (or atleast until we make jury). Make connections and make people depend on you/like you enough that even if they betray you, it won't be you, who gets the boot. We just have to be careful, especially depending on what awaits us at Thera. The new Idolsystem is very very interesting to say atleast. It seems multi facetted and apparently Thera plays into it, so yeah

Music. Video. Challenge. No. I hate it. However, I stupidly volunteered to edit the damn video and I'm literally wasting almost three whole days of my life editing It's Raining Men. But I'm putting a ton of effort in so even if we lose I think I might be doing enough to make people feel sorry for me and like they can't vote me out. But by golly if I ever have to do another music video in my life I am RIOTING.

So for this challenge I’m really not feeling too hot about my tribes chances. It seems like not many people are excited about it, granted I did get a score of 8 on guess who. Hopefully we can pull it together.

Omg were back to original tribes..... it’s 7 heroes and it’s 4 original Armonia and 3 molysmeno. I’m with Dennis and Chris who were in the mystery inc alliance so I trust them. But then Malik is here who is someone I played a FB BB org with over a year ago and we went to f3 together and were extremely loyal. And then we have Ned who is one of my best friends from ORGs ever. Ned caught me up to date pretty quick about how he’s been targeted by Olivia and Trent. That’s dangerous for sure. He also said that there’s a Ned/Olivia/Keegan/Malik alliance that ‘plans’ on working together.... I have a plan to break that one up.

So I broke the news to Malik that Olivia led a campaign to target him and while he was really upset, he took the news well. Honestly, this has been the most gameplay I’ve done all season and it’s weird because I’m trying to be cool calm and collected. Also, Olivia and Keegan are so hard to chat with .... they just leave me on read so often, or will just react to my messages halfway during our chats and it’s just hard to chat with them. Neither of them want to talk game at all, and I’m thinking it’s cause they believe they’re going to be Armonia strong. Further to this, Dennis and Chris said the same thing is happening to them too. Malik approached me about a me, him, Ned, Dennis and Chris alliance. That works well for me honestly. I can get behind that quite frankly. As long as Ned and Malik can play both sides for at least this round, I won’t have much blood on my hands. My only fear is about idols or double votes or what not. If we split the votes and they have a double vote it could 3-3-2. That would cause a revote so all would be fine. But as long as they don’t sniff it out we should good. This is all dependant if we can win or not.

Woo we won immunity!!!! 😄😄😄 i worked so hard and Keegan kicked ASSSSS (pun on my password lol) I’m terrified for my buddies sharifa, Trent, Kurt, and Jake because they’re outnumbered. I hope Lukas can flip or something

Things got insane after the immunity, all of the other villains were messaging me except for Kage. Suddenly everyone wants to work with me...sounds fake but okay. Matt and Sarah were ALLLLLLLLL up in my dm's talking about how they weren't going to vote for me because of how hard I worked on the challenge. Do I believe them? No. We’re all villains, someone here literally voted out Isaac on his birthday LFKJASDKJFA. But I do think it’s smart for them to work with me, taking out the target on everyone's back eventually means yours is the only one people can shoot at. Yes I'm the biggest target, but that means I'm a shield for yalls bitch asses. I'm just never gonna fully trust Matt and Sarah, they think they have the game WRAPPED around their pretty little fingers, and their final 2 is BLATANT. Then Lukas messaged me saying the same thing, but it felt genuine from him. We ended up having a lovely chat and I trust that a lot more than anything Mattrah said to me. MATTRAH AKSDLFJALSDJ. I went from Trolivia to Mattrah I'm never escaping these duos GOD. Speaking of which, Matt revealed that Kage was bringing back everything Trent was saying to Mattrah. So I gave Trent the heads up and then proceeded to throw him under the bus to Matt. Initially the plan was to get the target on Trent and then use my idol on him...and I even said that to Trent. But there’s a whole day left to play tomorrow so I have ZERO idea what I’m doing as of now. It’s a huge risk not to play the idol on myself, and everyone could just be trying to make me feel safe...but a part of me thinks I might have an opportunity to get power. The most interesting convo I had was with Nicklas. I’ve just had a feeling about that one since the swap, and we had a really meaty game talk. Not even talking about the game but just strategy in general...that one is a smart fucking cookie, I like him. He reminds me of myself in a lot of ways, the more pragmatic side. I was open that I was really fucking with what he was saying, and he seemed to be vibing me. It just felt like a lot of effort for him to put in just to make me feel comfortable but YOU NEVER KNOW. Everyone, and I mean everyone said they wanted to talk about the vote tomorrow...I feel like everyone is trying to use me in their plots and schemes, but I’m the queen for a reason. I need to figure out how to not only survive, but put MYSELF in a better position by doing what I need to happen. I have to take paranoia out of it, I have to take my personal shit out of it, forget I'm one of the pieces and step back and look at the chessboard as a whole. Tomorrow is going to be a huge day, if I go home, I’m gonna leave SWWWWIIIINNNNGGGGGGIIIING!! YOU WANT TO TAKE ME OUT YOU BETTER EARN IT!!

All that work was worth it! We won the immunity challenge! By a glorious 2 points! The only thing that worries me is whether SHARIFA and TRENT can survive this vote. KURT or JAKE can be voted out and I won’t feel any amount of sadness over it. I still feel like it’s early enough in the game that anything can happen so I’m really hoping the McBITCHES can stay whole until another swap/merge and we can reunite. I think for my own safety I’m going to try to propose an alliance of sorts with ANDREAS and maybe CHRIS, maybe bring in OLIVIA. I don’t think it would be the worst thing in the world to lose NED, but if we lose the next challenge I think it would be in our best interest to vote out DENNIS or CHRIS, depending on who OLIVIA and MALIK would rather see go.

 This week was a bad week to go to NOLA. I can tell I'm not doing so hot with the people on my tribe. Not bad, but not good. Kage apologized for "not checking up on me" after tribal today. Days after I already told him I was feeling fine about it all and just wanted to let him know since other people checked on me. Lukas has been quieter with me. Sarah and I are still talking but it took a lot to get info out of her today. People are also talking about the game without me cause Kage told Sarah that Trent was trying to target her earlier this morning as an "easy vote". And only Sarah told me that but I doubt only Sarah and Kage know about it. So I’m aware of my spot here…

Ok so update: We won the challenge by two points! The other tribe did great but we ended up getting the win! And based on what I know, Olivia was likely really trying to gun for me and said that to Matt because they were able to talk as Olivia confirmed it to me herself, and there’s no way Matt can randomly come up with that when he doesn’t even know me. So the second we lose if we do, Olivia is going home. She did great in the challenge, but if I know someone’s after me I never just let them stay in the game. I also got an alliance going with me, Ned, Chris, Andreas and Dennis! We(or I atleast) called it the teen titans and everyone went with it and we have roles. I’m cyborg, Andreas is Starfire, Chris is Raven, Dennis is Robin and Ned is Beast Boy. I love that group, they definitely made me feel at home on the new tribe!

i can’t believe we lost this effing challenge. LITERALLY ROBBED. anyways, first lemme confess about my new tribe. of course the other tribe has majority. i’m with kurt and sharifa who are the ones i trust, trent is iffy especially since i lies about the keegan vote, but came forward after to try to put it behind us nicklas is here who i trust a lot but am trying to keep the connection low because tbh idek how far he would go for me, i’ll have to see what happens in the vote to determine that. sarah might have a grudge against me idk, matt can’t even be assed to talk to me, i know lukas a bit and me and kage are eh. sharifa is worried we won’t have majority but this queen tellls me she has the idol so we might have some luck nicklas told me he doesn’t trust kage so i’m gonna try to work that angle, i just need me and my girlies to SURVIVE.

I'm so happy that we won! I get we have ideal targets but if I can go as many rounds as possible without seeing tribal, it'll increase my longevity in making the bonds I need to! Teen Titans was created (Dennis, Andreas, Ned, Malik, and myself) and I honestly love it! Between that and Mystery Inc and Andreas & The Chipmunks I feel good!

My gut has been telling me Kage is in trouble and so if he does get voted I'll feel horrible for not warning him that some people in MI think he had the idol. Hopefully he, Matt, and Sarah at least can pull through but I dunno, I have a bad feeling for one them going home

Omgggg so I had a very cathartic and explosive meltdown last night. I think this is my first time I’ve ever let like... true emotions trickle into an org. But I don’t regret it and I think it was a valuable experience. In terms of the vote tonight, I have no idea. I want to vote with Matt and Sarah because I think they will be a good lotus of power to cling to for awhile. I want to keep Kurt and Nicklas close as well, but Nicklas is kinda elusive. I assume the vote will land on Kage or Trent, which are both completely fine options to me. Both are a little unpredictable but Trent is super nice so I would feel bad.

*later on*

I feel like I’m in an okay spot! I helped launch the Kage vote (which hopefully will work) but I don’t think anyone sees me as the mastermind. I’m getting super close with Kurt and Matt. Jake seems to not hate me. Trent is def weary of me, but I’m weary of him too, so I’m not offended. My plan as of now is to just play this middle zone as much as I can!

I’m beginning to think that there’s nothing at all in the “idol system” and it’s all an elaborate ruse. Or I’m just that unlucky. I’ve also spent a bit of time on the blog typing random things into the URL in hopes of it revealing something useful but no luck with that yet either.

[american-cobrahawk]

Opinions on the Survivor 35 Cast

JP Hilsabeck: He’s my favorite right off the bat. He seems like such a great, humble guy. I also love how he wants to use the money to help those with immune thrombocytopenic purpura. I’m a little worried about his middle ground view of things. Speaking as someone who tries to stay middle ground, I know that doesn’t work as well as it should because many people nowadays have a “with us or against us” mentality. Especially in Survivor, if you don’t side with the majority, you’re on the chopping block. I wish him the best nonetheless

Cole Medders: He’s an interesting character for sure. What he does is really cool, I think I might need to do that one day. Like go with him not do what he does as a career. I think he has the survival aspect down, I don’t know about the social game so well have to see how that goes down.

Devon Pinto: I’ll admit he’s a lot deeper than I mistook him him for. As Fabio taught us in Season 21, people like him could win so I shouldn’t entirely count him out. I love what he wants to do with the money, not as much as what JP wants to do, but I respect it nonetheless. I wish he had told us a little more of his strategy, because I really don’t know what to expect from him.

Mike Zahalsky: Two words. Early boot. He talks a lot of game without realizing what he’s up against. Dude, the internet lets people watch all seasons of Survivor. Also, he seems to have this awkwardness to him (not that being awkward is bad I’m awkward myself), and that might be hard for him to make alliances. One thing I will give him is that he does seem pretty smart, but he still seems to have several deficits and I don’t think he’ll last very long.

Patrick Bolton: He seems very ambitious and with a good work ethic. Like he said his biggest problem will probably sunburn from being a ginger (his words not mine). The ambition could be good as it will make him resourceful, but it could be bad because as we’ve seen, it has put a target on people’s back. I think he’ if nothing else, make it to the merge.

Desi Williams: She looks like a definite possibility to win. Being a professor she definitely has good social skills and being a PT she’s definitely smart. She seems cautious, but serious in her game play which is a good combination. She might need some help with the survival aspect, but that’s not as important as it used to be.

Ali Elliot: Everything she says is right, like how the world is people from different walks of life and we have to respect, to the game being about lying and deceiving, to needing to do things in moderation on Survivor. I’m a little worried she’ll be like Kristina from Redemption Island, knew exactly what was going on but no one listened to her

Simone Nguyen: I get a negative vibe from her, she seems to be the villain of the season and not the likable kind like Tony, I’m sensing a Morgan (Cagayan) vibe from her like how she talked about targeting  people’s insecurities. At the same time, she was shaking a lot  so I’m questioning her confidence. I don’t think I’m gonna like her tbh.

Roark Luskin: She seems like a really nice person, but I’m not sure how she’ll do.Her idea of insidious gameplay does work as shown by Sarah last season, but I don’t Roark has it in her to play that way. I think she’ll be a fan favorite, but I don’t think she’ll win.

Jessica Johnston: She seems like a nice person but I think she would be more like an Amazing Race contestant with her brains and brawns. What she said about her talking too much is what I’m worried will do her in, that’s why I feel she’d be better on The Amazing Race, a mistake like that is less costly on TAR.

Alan Ball: Being an NFL player he’s immediately on the chopping block because people will assume he won’t need the money. He’s pretty funny but his attitude when he’s hungry, I’m worried about. I wish him the best, but I don’t think he’ll make it that far.

Chrissy Hofbeck: I sense intense rivalry between her and Simone due to their differing views on diversity. Her actuary profession I think will definitely help her a lot in the game. I do sense a bit of feminist behind her, but we’ll see how that plays out. I can see her making it well into the merge.

Katrina Radke: She has a lively spirit, and she seems like a cool woman, but I’ve seen people like her on Survivor before and they’re either ostracized or voted out early. I hope she’s not either but looking at history I feel it’ll repeat.

Laura Rimmer: Like many others, she seems adept to the survival skills. Her domineering attitude  I think will make people not like her on her tribe and make her an easy target. I think she’ll be booted before the merge.

Ashley Nolan: I don’t really know what to expect from her. I think she’ll be out of focus for the most part.

Ben Driebergen: Like Ashley I don’t know what to expect from him. I doubt he’ll win though

Ryan Ulrich: He seems like a very interesting character with his history and personality. He’s not my favorite, but I really like him. If it comes down to a bitter jury, I think he could win. I wish him the best of luck, he seems like a really great person. He gives off the vibe of the mental powerhouse so I’m not sure he’ll need luck.

Joe Mena: He reminds me of Tony Vlachos, I love Tony Vlachos so that’s a good thing. Given Tony’s reputation, I think he might have trouble earning people’s trust. I think he’s getting a little ahead of himself, but I thought the same thing about Tony and he won so I could be wrong. We’ll just have to wait and see

[missingapulse]

16, 6, 9!

which muse is most willing to fight another muse?

okay, literally, lazarus slayne will fight anything that moves, as i’m sure most of y’all know, by now. literally such an angry child, mostly bc of her horrid childhood, but angry, nonetheless!! and, like … she’s chilled out a lot but still. + coranza, salem, keiran, and narella !! they’re all easy to pick a fight w too tbh.

which one of your muses have you been playing the longest?

lazarus, actually!! she started out as a chara on an indie rp blog that i had when the first descendants movie premiered?? bc i was trash for the movie and at the time, i was super afraid of joining an rpg??? sO YEAH.

she was a chara on an indie blog, and she was originally SUPER well-mannered, expert ballroom dancer, literally so graceful, sO REGAL??? her original fc was samantha isler but she had zero resources sO. when i brought her here, i changed her fc to kat newton bc they were both from supernatural and i loved my spn girls sm bUT kat’s resources did NOT fit a regal af girl, so i just kinda ….. changed her??? made her from the isle, made her angry and tragic af???? and i am sO HAPPY THAT I DID I LOVE LAZ SM !!!!!!!

why were you drawn to each one of your characters?

oKAY Y’ALL ARE GETTIN A LIST LETSGO

LAZARUS: okay, so, like i said, she was originally so different??? and i was originally drawn to her bc at the time that i made her, the darkness aka amara in her ‘teen years’ or whatever (played by samantha isler huhuhu) had been introduced on supernatural??? and she was sO regal and badass and powerful and i just??? wanted that??? and the corpse bride seemed like she would have a regal af daughter bc idk. she would want a man to fall in love w her daughter one day??? and she believed that men only loved ‘proper’ ladies or whatever???? sOMETHING LIKE THAT. so i just lowkey ….. took amara and revised her to my liking??? also renamed her????

bUT THEN. sam had zero resources, and i rly loved claire novak??? so kat was my second option bc??? spn girls ok. and idk?? kat’s resources were all badass af. i wanted an isle child??? plus i just loved the corpse bride but i was also already an expert at writing children w deadbeat parents (i’ve been angsty writing stories since i was in like elementary school let me live) and so???? lazarus slayne just kinda????? bECAME????? pLUS i felt like a ‘doesn’t give a crap’ kinda chara was a great way to break the ice in a new rp????? tHIS GIRL HAS SUCH A BACKSTORY LEAVE ME ALONE

KETURAH: okay so after sO LONG of not being interested in wreck-it ralph, i was lowkey forced to watch it one day and i fELL IN LOVE WITH VANELLOPE VON SCHWEETZ and i had wanted to make a smol daughter of her for the loNGEST TIME, but i was like??? ehhhhh. nah. aND THEN. ally made hershey and i was still lowkey hesitant tbh?? i was like. meh i can live w/o her. bUT the more i saw hershey on the dash, the more i nEEDED this candy child???? so eventually, i made her??? and listen, i had such a hard time finding an fc for her like. i was looking for an fc w coloured hair that looked super duper sweet??? and originally, i’d been gonna use son naeun, but she was taken at the time so i settled for joy??? aND I AM SO HAPPY THAT I DID I LOVE JOY I LOVE KET I LOVE JOY AS KET BYEEEE

KASIAH: basically, i went through this period of time where every morning when i woke up, i’d be super bored so i would turn on a disney movie??? aND there are so many pixie hollow fairies movie that i would usually opt for one of those?? aND ONE DAY, i turned on the pirate fairy and i was like. ‘wow hey i don’t have a fairy anymore since i dropped olwen??? i love the fairies???????’ aND. that movie is like ….. all about dust keepers tBH so i was like !! dustkeeper would be cool !! and originally i was gonna make a child of terrance but then i was like ??????? pixie dust alchemy wtf so cool??????? and i’d been wanting to use son naeun since i’d made kitket sO THUS KASIAH WAS BORN

JUNIPER: okay so literally. i wanted an ethereal af child named juniper tBH. that’s the short version. i thought it was cute af and i was like???? wOW I NEED. and i was torn between will o’ the wisp or absolem as the parent, but cestrum was literally so cool?? and he made me realise how cool absolem was as a chara?? and i hAD to have juniper blue tbh.

also throwback to when wendy was originally her fc and it just ……. didn’t work. no one is as ethereal was yeri. literal ethereal queen

ELODIE: oKAY. so i had made elodie once before, but the must just hadn’t worked out??? basically, i just loved rowan blanchard and??? originally she’d been gonna be a hood child, but just!! i wanted a guardian kid sm !!!!! so i made her, and ended up dropping her a few months later??? bUT. then linda brought nyle and she talked me into remaking elodie and yEAH.

MILLICENT: oKAY SO. throwback to when tasha was still here zane, lilith, and poppy were all a thing, like !! i gained muse for milly when i lost muse for lilith??? bc i knew that i still wanted a halloweentown kid, just … not ….. lilith??? sO. i thought up this feisty lil girl w an old lady name and just??? when i looked at jungkook, i just saw dahyun as his sister for sOME REASON????? so i hAD TO USE HER??? aND YEAHHHH

CHANCE: oKAY. so i watched zootopia for the first time and i was like !!!!! i love nick wilde !!!!! but i originally wasn’t going to make him bc i was like??? ehhhhh. but then i dECIDED TO and he was originally supposed to be a jerk??? like. he was such a jerk in his very first ever starter ok. a jerky lowkey con artist type of guy????? bUT THEN HE MET LUNA AND HE CHANGED AND HE WAS SOFT AND NOW HE IS PERMANENTLY SOFT AND I LOVE HIM + i’d been wanting to use l.joe for a while tbh

MATILDA: oKAY SO. when i was younger, i LOVED the heffalump movie. lumpy !! was !! my !! fave !! and so one day, my sister and i watched the movie again and??? i fell in love w that smol heffalump aLL OVER AGAIN. and i tried to refrain form making this kid bUT I JUST COULDN’T TBH. i needed the smol heffalump who was always barefoot, who only wore lilac, who sang songs all the time, who couldn’t do a heffalump call !!! smol heffalump who called herself tilly bc she always used to forget her full name when she was younger !! who was afraid of the rest of the hundred acre woods bc she was afraid she’d get ‘hunted’ like pooh and the gang tried to do to lumpy !!! and yooa was the immediate choice for her fc like??? smol heffalump who has a cute british accent w yooa as the fc??? ummmm yES. (tho i tried melanie martinez as her fc for a while and that just … didn’t work out idk)

EIVUI: i wanted an alien kid again !!!!! and pleakley was just so iconic??? and arin was so aDORABLE????? this baby just called to me okay. little ballet dancer who steals clothing from random boys that she sees bc she thinks their clothes look comfier??? tiny child who practically gets swallowed by the clothes that she steals??? obsessed w mosquitoes bc she thinks her dad saved them & e-arth???? just likes sparkly things too??? literally the most dRAMATIC CHILD TO WALK THE FACE OF THE EARTH !!!! fake cries??? to get what she wants??? uMMM YES????

CORANZA: bASICALLY I JUST FELL IN LOVE WITH ELENA OF AVALOR AS SOON AS IT PREMIERED ON DISNEY CHANNEL TBH OK. like, elena was so pure?? so sweet??? so helpful??? so i was like??? what if she had a royal bitch as a daughter??? how would tHAT GO??? and voila !!!! coranza was born !!!!! i dropped her at one point but i picked her back up in a heartbeat bc??? i just????? missed??????? her??????????

ASTORIA: from the time i was, like, seven?? eight?? narnia was my absolute fAVE. i loved aslan?? and i’d had an aslan child before but i dropped her. but then like, a year later??? i just saw taissa and i was like??? narnia !!!! aslan !!! like. i needed a powerful af lioness. magic that no one can explain????? the daughter of the purest entity in narnia AND the most corrupt entity in narnia??? + i’d considered her as a daughter of reepicheep also but i love aslan so??????? yEAH.

ZAIRE: i had wanted to use byun baekhyun for the longest time, but i had no idea where to put him??? but then i literally fell in love with the beldam lore that whale had created and i just??? had to????? and he was originally lowkey?? a punk?? but then he actually became good at poetry and he became soft and??? but then i dropped him for a while bUT THEN I MISSED MY SOFT POETIC SON SO YEAH.

SALEM: oKAY. so, throwback to zane, lilith, and poppy aGAIN. bc salem is basically a revised, reboot of lilith??? i love tnbc sm??? i missed this child sm??? but the name lilith had been taken when i brought her back, and when i originally made her, salem was my second choice sO !!! aLSO. you can find the inspiration for her hide and seek games HERE. and then her witchcraft?? i new a guy who was into witchcraft and i was like????? sounds like smth salem would get into while she was back on the isle so why tf not

KEIRAN: literally i had just wanted a mist kid for the longest time??? i don’t know wHY EXACTLY esp since i already had a fairy child bUT??? keiran mist called to me okay. and originally she was supposed to be a smol, but now she’s a punk who uses weird af insults and??? yEAH. THIS ONE JUST HAPPENED TBH IDEK

NARELLA: listen. my sister and i started watching the show white collar and?? i fell in love w neal caffrey. he was suave and charming and manipulative and i just !! wanted that !! and i also wanted another alien child, and i considered stitch?? but then, the next day, i watched leroy and stitch and i was like ……. y e s. sO YEAH

FELICITY: oKAY SO I HAD WANTED A SOFIA CHILD FOR AWHILE bc i literally would watch sofia the first w my niece every. single. day. but like, i managed to resist the muse for a while??? aND THEN. one day, i remember sarah posted smth abt having watched sofia the first in the ooc chat and so i was like !!!!! mE TOO !!!!! and then just ….. the soft-spoken, animal-friendly, kindhearted babe literally named after ‘a state of happiness’ was born !!!!!!! + her original fc was stefanie scott, but her resources were so bad???? and also i am so in love w for dove cameron so like ….. and !! my muse went up so much when i switched to dove so like??? ayyyyy bless

JUSTICE: fAM I HAVE LOVED HTTYD FOR Y E A R S OK. literally endless love for toothless tbh??? aND I HAD WANTED THIS BABE FOR SO LONG BEFORE I MADE HER. she was originally supposed to be a smol but now she’s not??? but i am a-ok w this tbh like??? idk. she just became this person who just really doesn’t care?? like … she’ll probs …..start getting high all the time at sOME POINT??? she just feels so USELESS as a human bc she’s handicapped??? and the idea of her being handicapped literally just came from toothless’ missing part of his tail tbh. this just just her leg instead?? and she was born w it sO.

CERIDWEN: okay so the ursula event fucked me up?? and aLSO?? dESCENDANTS 2????? basically, i fell in love w the idea of an ursula daughter and like. as soon as i thought of her, the ideas just kEPT COMING. like??? ursula stole her voice??? yES. ursula actually won her in a deal??? yESS. ursula forced her to be a sea witch??? yESSS. and then the eels came from flotsam and jetsam tbh??? but like, zip and blu are actualy??? nICE??????? bUT YEAH. I LOVE THIS GIRL TBH PLS LOVE HER TOO

[thestarmaker]

Do all of them now damnit

i figured this would happen haha

1. What is you middle name? Clarice2. How old are you? 183. What is your birthday? June 234. What is your zodiac sign? Cancer5. What is your favorite color? Green!6. What’s your lucky number? 9, also 2597. Do you have any pets? a wonderful rabbit8. Where are you from? a place barely anyone’s ever heard of and we’re known for great sweet corn even tho we’re in upstate new york9. How tall are you? 5′ 4.25″10. What shoe size are you? like 8 i think11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? 9 or so but i wear like 312. What was your last dream about? i… don’t remember honestly, i haven’t been sleeping great (or much) the last few nights b/c i’m on vacation and sharing a bed w/someone you’re not gonna spoon with makes for light sleep lmao13. What talents do you have? i can write poetry for dayssss14. Are you psychic in any way? maybe? my intuition is on p o i n t and i tend to just know things, ya know? 15. Favorite song? jfc um… “Little Infinity” by Make Out Monday16. Favorite movie? fuck… the three videos that make up Monster Factory’s Fallout 4 destruction w/The Final Pam b/c that’s almost 90 minutes so it counts17. Who would be your ideal partner?@jimboakimbo ngl, which is super great b/c he /is/ my partner18. Do you want children? at the moment, no19. Do you want a church wedding? idgaf, but my wedding will be so Aesthetic™20. Are you religious? not really21. Have you ever been to the hospital? yeah, but to visit people22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? nope23. Have you ever met any celebrities? i high-fived/hugged 3 out of 4 members of Marianas Trench, also i met Andrew McMahon once and it was absolutely amazing he’s so sweet24. Baths or showers? Already answered!25. What color socks are you wearing? None atm26. Have you ever been famous? haha nope27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? depends what i’m doing, but i’d like it because of the impact i could have on other people’s lives28. What type of music do you like? mostly alternative29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? yep30. How many pillows do you sleep with? Already answered!31. What position do you usually sleep in? Already answered!32. How big is your house? Not very big, it’s a little ranch-style house i think but it’s perfect :)33. What do you typically have for breakfast? i don’t usually eat breakfast b/c i get sick if i eat too early…34. Have you ever fired a gun? airsoft, yeah. but actualy bullets? nope35. Have you ever tried archery? yep, but only target practice i could never shoot an animal oh god36. Favorite clean word? Entropy37. Favorite swear word? either fuck or shit isk lmao38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep? like almost 44 hours b/c i wanted to see how long i could make it39. Do you have any scars? Already answered!40. Have you ever had a secret admirer? Nope41. Are you a good liar? Depends on how big the lie. the smaller, the easier42. Are you a good judge of character? y e s and i wish people listened to me more when i tell them someone is not a good person43. Can you do any other accents other than your own? i can do british and southern, but the rest aren’t very good44. Do you have a strong accent? no…? but no one thinks they themselves have a strong one so?45. What is your favorite accent? probably scottish or irish tbh46. What is your personality type? INFP-T47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing? my senior prom dress probably48. Can you curl your tongue? yep49. Are you an innie or an outie? innie50. Left or right handed? right51. Are you scared of spiders? only if they’re on me, usually52. Favorite food? any asian food honestly i love it (but not sushi)53. Favorite foreign food? … see above question oops54. Are you a clean or messy person? organized mess?55. Most used phrased? “i get that” probably56. Most used word? i have no idea haha57. How long does it take for you to get ready? like 10-15 minutes58. Do you have much of an ego? i seriously doubt it59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? both60. Do you talk to yourself? yes61. Do you sing to yourself? y e s62. Are you a good singer? i’ve been told i am but /i/ don’t like my voice much63. Biggest Fear? tornadoes and where i live hardly gets any ever so everyone’s like “oh that’s irrational uwu” and now i can be like “no tf it’s not we just got a few like a month ago the fair almost didn’t happen”64. Are you a gossip? no, i like to hear it but i don’t spread it65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen? The Imitation Game, probably66. Do you like long or short hair? on me? short. on others? w/e they like ^-^67. Can you name all 50 states of America? yep! in under 20 seconds68. Favorite school subject? science69. Extrovert or Introvert? introvert70. Have you ever been scuba diving? no, but i’ve been snorkeling71. What makes you nervous? existing lmao72. Are you scared of the dark? nope!! My night vision is fantastic anyway from all the times i’ve been stargazing73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? depends on both the person and the mistake74. Are you ticklish? pfft what me no pssh nope not at all pfft nope pssh75. Have you ever started a rumor? nope76. Have you ever been in a position of authority? yeah i was the president of my high-school’s GSA in senior year which was good b/c the person running against me lost and got VP and is just terrible77. Have you ever drank underage? yes78. Have you ever done drugs? nope79. Who was your first real crush? my best friend i think lmao, but that’s been gone for a while now80. How many piercings do you have? just one in each ear81. Can you roll your Rs?“ yep82. How fast can you type? average speed i guess83. How fast can you run? not very84. What color is your hair? dirty blonde, but now it’s a little blonder b/c summer sun85. What color is your eyes? green…ish-gray with hints of blue? they aren’t as cool as they sound86. What are you allergic to? nothing that i know of87. Do you keep a journal? for witchcraft, yes but not for day-to-day stuff88. What do your parents do? my dad’s pretty much an engineer for our cousin’s company which is cool89. Do you like your age? yeah, but i don’t like the drinking age tho lmao90. What makes you angry? when people refuse to see the other side of an argument when that other side has actual rational points, that’s actually the worst oh my fucking god not everyone shares your opinion91. Do you like your own name? yeah92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they? nope93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child? don’t care, i mean i don’t want kids right now but even if i did i wouldn’t care94. What are you strengths? i’m pretty smart, i can hold conversations with pretty much any age group, i’m apparently pretty easy to get along with, and i have a pretty creative mind95. What are your weaknesses? not being able to help enough in certain fields, dogs (esp samoyeds my fluffy babies), animals in general, putting people too high on a pedestal, getting attached to anyone who shows me any kindness ever, cream soda, black cherry cream soda, question 74 shut up, big soft pieces of clothing, cats, The G Note™ shut up, i also get flustered really easily which can kind of be a problem sometimes, also i cry a lot96. How did you get your name? my middle name - Clarice - comes from my great-grandmother Clara, and my first comes from the italian word for angel b/c my mom had trouble becoming pregnant and was told that she probably wouldn’t even survive being pregnant with me or the birth… but she did, and here i am. I assume that’s why, at least97. Were your ancestors royalty? not that i’m aware of98. Do you have any scars? Already answered!99. Color of your bedspread? it’s a bunch of mismatched blankets tbh100. Color of your room? like wood paneling it’s kinda weird but i like it

Thanks Sarah!!!

[survivor-guyana]

Episode 3 - "I am like... a very good person." - Nikias

I forgot what i said last but this tribe swap was very good for me. I kept two allies Mitchell and Sarah. But also Aidan and Dani were in my “best fucking people ever” alliance so thats good. We have a fav Jenna with us. I dont want to lose but if we do its gunna hopefully be her. Im sorry but u guys are up by 2. 👀 keeping eye out for Jones and Tim.

I was honestly sad about the swap because i liked my tribe so much. However, im excited to see how this all plays out. It seems like we got active fans on our tribe so hopefully group challenges will work well!

TRIBE SWAP HAPPENED FUCK originally I was gonna sue the hosts,,, ORIGINALLY I was gonna file a restraining order,,,,, but,,, the more I thought about it,, and the more I talked with everyone on my "new tribe",,, I'm feeling okay? which is SHOCKINg for my standards let me elaborate,, I put "new tribe" in quotes because is it REALLY a new tribe when 5 of the 6 people are from the same original tribe? The tribe consists of myself, Nick, Tim, TJ, JD, and Nikias. Which is GREAT for me for a whole list of reasons... I don't think we'll lose as much because we have comp threats like JD and Nick on our team. If we DO lose, we have an easy boot in Nikias. And if we lose AGAIN, I'm in a 3 person majority with Nick and Tim (and maybe even TJ too) .So no matter how this swap ends up, I don't think I'll be the first person booted if we go to a tribal council at any point. which is GREAT. Actual now that I think about it, if we never go to tribal, that would be even more incredible. Because I think I'm doing a decent job at pulling Nikias onto my side. I don't think he's a bad person, and if we do lose, it would absolutely SUCK because he's really cool/could be a good ally down the road. actually now that I think about it,, I've talked more with Nikias in one night than I've talked to JD in a week? is that saying a lot? I think so. I ACTUALLY MESSAGED JD TOO and she was like "can I get back to you later? I'm busy" WHICH IS FINE and it's a lot better than leaving me on read BUT LIKE,,,, okay Jan. If I WERE to hypothetically go to tribal,,, I'd much rather see JD go than Nikias, but I'm not sure if I can help that? It really depends on what everyone else wants to do, because I don't really wanna stray away from the majority of the group at the first tribal I go to yk? Like,,, everyone on the tribe knows she's good in challenges, and if we ever LOSE a challenge, why get rid of the person who's best at challenges? IDK. hopefully we don't go to tribal at all? and I don't have to worry about losing ANYONE? that'd be great, thanks! god why couldn't i have been switched onto a tribe with Jose, thinking about this would've been WAY easier.

So the swap: I feel really good about the swap bc 4/6 people in it are in an alliance. First of all, I want to win the challenge. Second, if we don’t win the challenge, I’ve wanted Mitchell out for a while now and I think Jenna will vote anyone to save her ass. I just hope the others stick to our alliance. It would be completely idiotic for them not to bc we have the numbers already, but who knows

SO THIS REWARD CHALLENGE IS scary,,,,,, not because I think I'm gonna lose or anything,, but it's because I think I have an actually decent score? Idk what Obey the Game standards are, but I got to level 108. which SUCKs if it actually is a good score, because I'm not too sure if I want to win this challenge. I feel like i'm in somewhat of a good position right now, and I don't need the idea of having an idol clue putting a target on my back. I have other people on my tribe (and on other tribes) that would share their clues with me,, I don't need people to know that I have one. hopefully that makes sense Best case scenario: Nick/Tim win - and they share it with me either way Maybe Okay Scenario?: TJ/Nikias/I win - not sure if either TJ or Nikias would share it with me, and I don't want to the target on my back. Worst Case Scenario: JD wins. She won't share it with me. And she probably wouldn't say anything if she won lol. so lets LOSE THIS THING, BABY, WOOHOO

Tribe swap... Tribe swap... Tribe swap... Tribe swap...  I still don't know how I'm personally doing in this game. This tribe swap is either going to make me or break me. There are four people from the other tribe and literally the ONE person I didn't want on my new tribe from my old tribe.. is honestly the ONE person I got stuck with. Is this some sick joke? Am I being Punk'd? Is this some sort of karma for being a bad human being from time-to-time? It's always hard to figure out what exactly my game plan is going forward. I'm honestly terrified of having a bad score and being voted out because I'm a weak-link. It's so much harder when you lose and there's only 5 other fucking options. I guess as of right now I'm trying to focus on making some social bonds. Sammy gave me that super idol so hopefully there is something there... Alyssa is basically me if I was 21, American, and like super pretty. Chelsea has some potential and José is a stoner like me? So I can work with this.. I just need them to want to work with me....

FUCK THIS PARANOIA OKAY I gotta give myself a lil more respect I've been freaking out for like,,,, 7 years now about who my "number one" should be - whether that be Sammy, Tim, Alyssa Nick TJ etc etc etksjadslfk the only person that can be my number one is me I can't keep looking out for every single person in this game - sure, it's nice to have people looking out for me, and I can always reciprocate it. But my top priority will always be the betterment of my game. I can't devote so much trust to so many people. If I had to rank the people in trust that I've met thus far (from most trustworthy to least), it would be Sammy > Tim > Alyssa > Nick > TJ > Nikias > JD > Jenna > Chelsea > Jose. So yeah.  This is Guacamole Jones' Decree of Solitude: I will resort to writing down all of my info (so I never forget) I will be honest with the people that are honest with me. But I will not share this information with anyone, but myself. If anyone wants to open up to me, I will consider sharing a piece of my info but never the whole truth, and never anything more. I will share what is best for me. So I may receive the hypothetical One Million Dollars (- tax) Signed, (with love) Jones.

So I feel pretty great about my new tribe.  5 original favorites and only 1 fan.  Nik got 2 votes last Tribal and seems to be on the outs with his old tribe.  Furthermore he seems like a good dude who if I can protect may give me his full loyalty going forward.  I also was lucky to swap with both Tim and Jonesy.  I also have a deal with JD and TJ.  So if we have to go to Tribal I’m not sure who is best for me to vote.  I’ll likely let the rest of the group decide and play along.  I am trending towards a leadership role, which is good for building a resume to win but with 18 ppl left it’s kind of early to be looking that far ahead.  As of now it’s better  to just stay under the radar and not make any waves.

Well, this swap was interesting. I reconnected with a great friend in Nikias and think I have a solid ally there moving forward. I’m glad I get the chance to build my relationship with Jones and Tim more, and I’m excited to learn more form Nick and JD. Overall, I’m very curious how this is going to go!

So how do i feel about my tribe swap? well in one word pretty weird.. The thing is that i am in a situation 5-1 which is pretty scary and it will be almost imposible to find cracks but on the other side i really like some people on this tribe. I feel like if i can make connections and play the card that i was on the bottom on the other tribe and that i hated my tribe, that could make them feel more secure with me. Its like i am in a bad position but it's a new begining in this game but i will just try to put myself in the best position possible. I am gonna try to be as carefull as i can be with my words and be better socially and work with people that are working together. But what is the best thing and the worst thing at the same time is that these 5 are strong competitors and i am like... a very good person. They can help me stay safe by winning immunity, but there is no doupt in my mind that i am gonna drag them down in the challenges and that's a really good argument of getting rid of me apart from being the only fan there.

ok soooo I have been talking with a bunch of peeps and I am trying to get a solid group that I can rely on.  I am super tight with Jones and TJ and I have talked a lot.  Also I am trying to get close with Alyssa.  Anyways, I think I have covered my ground with the active people.  Jenna is on and off a lot so I am not sure how well I can depend on her in the future but ya never know.  I feel bad for the fans tribe too tbh bc like they really flopping lmaoooo.  I hope there is a swap soon so that I can meet new people but also switch the game up a bit.  ILL TALK TO YALL LATER

So I go to bed early, cus I'm super tired from the competition (no I will not stop bragging about it lol) and when I work up, we won the challenge but i have like... 3 less people on my team. No need idea what happened. But I like it..oops to the person I'd just made an alliance with who is now on a tribe alone.... Was that one in the Alliance? I'm gonna have to check that lol the host are amazing, you've all been so go to me while I've been super busy, sorry of rigging me an idol, and trust me... I asked :( they are to good lol

I am a little it annoyed with how this game is going for myself, I am not sure if I want to trust Nick as much as I did before, we will see I suppose. But something that struck me funny is that out of 6 of us on this tribe 5 went to search the Rainforest, and I was the only one that went to search the mountains. Now, the only thing I can think of is that the clue had something to do with Water, close to it or around it or, like 'hey, dont get wet'. BECAUSE GUESS WHO FOUND THE IDOL? The one that didn't go to the rainforest, the one that didn't know anything about the clue! But I found it over by the stream on the mountain sooooo that is what I assume the clue said.  Anyway, I'm feeling really on the out's and right now I am only really liking talking to Jones, I know its not just about liking to talk to people but you gonna have something to talk about right? *sigh* anyway, sad JD here, sitting on the outside of her tribe, but still bringing home the challenge cus I was the only one that did the rap part in the Riff-Off. I wish I could say like, Canadian gotta rep that Drake, but I dont know much of his shit but I love that part of the riff-off (sunglasses) ((((  https://dumielauxepices.net/sites/default/files/sunglasses-emoji-clipart-oversized-784794-395105.jpg   ))))

(half of this is yawning)

So this Immunity challenge my team didn't work together very well.  We picked IMO a hard song to build a theme and story with.  In addition I was a very weak teammate this round.  I had a bunch going on and didn't record any video.  I tried to give input in ways we could be creative... but all in all I was one of the weakest links to the losing team.  For that I am a little nervous.  However I think I am in a good spot with Tim and Jonesy.  I have shared my idol clue with them and am working on building a trusting relationship to help me get to the end.  IN addition I've been having good one on one talks with JD, TJ, and Nikias.  I don't think my name is coming up from any front as a result of the work I'm doing sharing info with them all and making them feel apart of my gameplay.  TBH I don't know who to vote.  I like Nik alot and I believe him when he says he is on the outs with his old tribe and I think if I saved him he would be in my pocket for the rest of the game...  but I also think voting out a favorite could make me a target in a new swap to a group of favorites that want revenge.  So, really no reason to make waves.  Prob going to have to vote Nikias because it makes the most strategic sense.

Well that was a rough first week, back to back to back losses and tribal councils. Thankfully I wasn't among the first two leaving the game, but before we could even reconnect after Bee's departure, we were  thrown into a swap unprepared. Desperately wishing that my alliance had planned for a swap this early, but we were all thinking it wouldn't be for another tribal or two. My tribe broken and divided, I was lucky to land in a tribe with a majority of fans, while three of my tribe mates were thrown to the wolves in the other two tribes. Im worried that our success in the last immunity challenge, will be the death of Nikias, as he's the only fan in his tribe.

Shit I almost forgot to confess!! Im so glad that my tribe consists of mostly OG favorites and one fan! Im also HAPPY that I got to swap with Nick and Jones. At this point she's my number 1 ally. Together we searched the idol system but found NOTHING I'm- . 

We swapped this week and have 5fans/1fave AND we aren’t going to tribal this week. Life is good

Omg we swapped and I’m on my same tribe basically. 5/6 of us were originally on arakaka. But we finally aren’t going to tribal so thank god!! Judges were harsh though because we tried pretty hard okkk. Anyway I love the tribe still.HAPPY??

I think getting the numbers at the tribe switch is a blessing and a curse. I'm glad I'm with most of my "alliance" from the first tribe and definitely glad that I'm with Dani but I think it's going to give me this facade that I'm Arakaka strong until the end and I'm not sure. Playing in this new ORG environment where I don't really know anyone makes me feel like playing with no regrets. I don't owe any of these people anything and I trust absolutely none of them at this point...... I'm warming up to Mitchell more and more but I'm not sure how he fits in with the others. I do think he'll be loyal but who knows. I don't want to fry his chickens up in a Popeyes three piece just yet. As for Jenna... she's funny but bland with me? Maybe I need to try more but I'm threatened by her social game. But apparently she got 20th last time? I don't know how to feel about her. I think somebody on the ther tribe mentioned knowing her or being threatened by her. Maybe her scores were good? I have no idea but eh. At this point I just want to find a core three to move forward with but most of these people suck and I don't know if there already is one. 

So I've been with my new tribe for about 3 days now and I honestly still don't 100% know how I feel about this whole tribe swap ordeal. I PERSONALLY like the people on my new tribe better. My new tribe members are more personable (with the exception of José) and I don't feel like I'm wasting their time by talking to them like I had previously felt on my old tribe. As of right now I do feel a tad bit more comfortable with Devon. He gave me his idol clue but I'm not too sure if he's just really trying to make me fall for this or not? Maybe he has already found the idol? WHO KNOWS? Alyssa is super fucking cool. We don't really talk about the game as much so that kind of scares me BUT there hasn't been a lot of game to talk as of yet? SO maybe that will change going forward (I hope so). Alyssa is someone I can see myself working tbh. Alyssa and Sammy are definitely the two from the old Horososo Tribe who have reached out to me the most. They are the social King and Queen of this tribe. CONFIRMED. Knocking on wood here.. BUT if we ever go to Tribal MAYBE just MAYBE they'll not vote out José and not me? Praying to Gaga.

I won reward which was the idol clue. It doesnt really help me much but it does say there are other items as well in the game. And we won immunity whichbis great. Im so happy not having to go to tribal.

moooood ok i don’t mind the swap bc everything’s going ok and im still not pming people meidgjskdkf but the comp went rly good!!! we came in second but i found out there’s three tribes so it’s ok! judges think there was literally too many ads and it wasn’t the challenge but have u ever seen a full video without ads on youtube lmao

So my file corrupted on my original video for the challenge but I was able to submit something thanks to Jonesy. We lost anyways lmao and it looks like the vote tonight will be Nikias. Sorry pal but the numbers are just there.

I’m going on a date tonight so I’m case I don’t get to submit a video tonight, I just want to be VERY clear: I fucking LOVE Jess and would DIE for her. F2 homie vibes

So pretty much, I've been pretty much invisible the entire week, and it's been great. I'm letting my tribe drag me for now, and personally, i think with how things are going, we're going to continue to win challenges, and I don't have to worry until I reach another swap, which at that point, personally, I'm just going to go all in and people are going to be like... where did this bitch come from? LMAO

I couldn't be more happy to be on the strongest tribe! Sammy and Alyssa are quite close, but they are also tight with Chelsea. That leaves 2 options: 1. Get them to vote out Jose, based on inactive attitudes. He won't supply them with any use later down the road. 2. Get Jose to draw rocks with myself and Jess, leaving the odds in a 1/4 against me going in rocks. I'm torn on what the best strategy is, but for now, I need to establish the best personal connections possible and hope our tribe secures immunity all the way into the next swap/an eventual merge.

it's too late to come up with a jones pun, but,, JONES