#i think if i don’t get derived next time i go to the psych im gonna be like. okay. i stopped clonazepam entirely already.
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idk if it’s adhd or some other brain thing or what the fuck it is but my mind literally feels like a prison and i do not know what else to do to break out <3
#like i swear to fuck i am losing all hope.#this shit is bad enough without feeling like i need to defend myself every time i step a foot into the hospital!#why won’t my doctors just believe me lol!#is it really so so hard to say ‘ok let’s pretend you’re right for a moment. let’s try this out’#why would you as a professional withdraw a tool from me that is known to help people in my place just because you don’t feel like it#at least give me a valid reason la concha de la lora.#i think if i don’t get derived next time i go to the psych im gonna be like. okay. i stopped clonazepam entirely already.#i halved my antidepressant because it was making me feel like way more shit. i am not anymore on ‘too many drugs’#and am perfectly willing to just drop the ssri in favor of a low dose stimulant#if that doesn’t work then. i just see no point in trying to get treatment within the public healthcare system#it’s just wasting both my mental and physical energy while i just keep getting worse#silver lining is my friend might be able to find me someone who can assess me (his mom is a psychopedagogist and has contacts)#so i’m just. crossing my fingers for that at this point#cause it does feel like the only possible way out
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