#i think i'll be good by wednesday hopefully.
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daz4i · 11 months ago
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damn. i need to keep working on memorizing this monologue. god i'm so lazy and stupid for not working on it earlier *continues to not work on it*
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Wip Wednesday but I've completely lost the plot. The train isn't just off the tracks it's made it's way to a whole different planet.
Crochet has driven me to becoming the thing I would like to destroy. Or rather, I am thinking about buying yarn that I started a whole project to use up because I don't like it anymore.
This blanket was supposed to use up all my aran/worsted weight acyrlic yarn that are left overs from other projects or scrapped projects or just otherwise not set aside for something specific. I just don't knit using this type of yarn really anymore and it was taking up both a lot of physical space and a lot of space in my brain.
Up until laying out the yarn for photos I was very ok with it being ugly and the colours being wildly out of proportion. Until I realized it's basically a rainbow blanket and that I was really enjoying how it looked. Now I feel the (entirely internal) pressure to make it ACTUALLY look good. Also I don't think I'll have enough yellow to finish out this blanket so I need/want to buy more yarn anyway.
To make it more proportional I'm thinking another skein of the solid red. I'm also considering adding a variegated yarn (Warm Brights colourway) which is uhhhh Not usually something I like, I tend to really really dislike variegated colourways, but I don't mind them as much in granny stitch. And the Warm Brights would do a Lot to smooth the warm colours together. Theoretically the Unicorn Magic colourway of that same yarn would do the same with the bottom half but there's already going to be so much purple I'm hesitant to add even more (I keep arguing back and forth with myself over this I had to delete like four paragraphs of me being indecisive).
This is another case where I start a simple project and can't stop myself from over-complicating it but also hrrnggg pretty rainbow blanket. This man could be so gorg.
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mirrortouchedsea · 11 months ago
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A familiar set of red eyes appeared in the darkness as Kaoru slumped over in his chair. “What’s wrong, little Kaoru?” Rei asked, sliding into a chair across from Kaoru. He picked up one of the books and thumbed through it, seemingly able to read the words despite the dimming candle light. 
“Nothing, just don’t want to go back to studies next week.” Kaoru’s finger traced a circle on the table. “What about you?” 
Rei laughed softly. “It’s nothing you need to worry yourself with.” What a non-answer. By this point Kaoru was aware of the weird disease that impacted the Sakuma family and that Rei was concerned about how it would develop in his younger brother, but the details of it were never specific.
“Is it your brother again?” He couldn’t help but ask. Kaoru had met the younger Sakuma a few times and he was polite enough to his face, though Kaoru suspected he was just putting up an act like everyone else. 
“How astute of you Kaoru,” Rei commented, setting the book down on the table, bored of its contents already. “But no, it’s not about little Ritsu this time.” Kaoru raised an eyebrow but decided to let the conversation drop for now. Rei grabbed another book. “You’ve been reading an awful lot about mermaids recently.” 
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todayisafridaynight · 2 years ago
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sometimes i like to think about ichi and the gang letting jo go up the millennium with them before shipping him off to the big house and then just sicking him onto tendo like a rapid dog when they get to him
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britneyshakespeare · 2 years ago
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why does scheduling my work days give me so much stress and anxiety
#i was supposed to do my first day at the high school today but i had literally so much anxiety i could not fall asleep last night no matter#what. i had so much dread. i took so much melatonin lol.#i could shut my brain off till i went into the application and deleted my schedule for the day#ive just been feeling so fatigued and exhausted since i got covid it's crazy. sometimes i'll have bursts of energy where im productive#but yesterday i was just so tired from loading the washing machine. just. fucking sorting clothes and putting them in#that i had to lie down on the floor for a few minutes in the middle of it#not my finest moment#tales from diana#i didn't have anything scheduled for tomorrow and i thought 'maybe if i feel better tonight ill call in'#but i dont feel. super better tonight. and the only thing that i could do tomorrow at my preferred school is kindergarten subbing#for like the main classroom teacher. which i havent done before so i figured 'yeah im not gonna get my anxiety up 2 days in a row'#i deserve to sleep tonight after all and i think if i committed to that i wouldnt be able to#but i am going into my elementary school on wed-thur-friday of this week. wednesday is only a half day but they'll probably find smth for me#to do in the afternoon. they usually do. and im fine w that.#idk im just much more comfortable in my elementary school. i guess bc ive worked there before and i went to school there#as a wittle student waaaay back in the day. like i know the building and it doesn't scare me and i know a good amount of kids there#and the staff don't intimidate me. so yeah.#i did schedule my first job at the high school FOR REAL THIS TIME and it's next friday. hopefully ill be doing better by then.#im working the thursday before it at the elementary so i'll be in the rhythm of that. idk how to explain it but it's harder to go back#to work when ive taken a day off. like that's also why im not going in tomorrow.#friday (4/07) was the first day i worked since i got covid and that was fine but also. i was so anxious just to go in.#and so so so so tired when i got home. and all weekend.#yeah i wasn't ready to start working at the high school today. that was nonsense.#hopefully all will go well on wednesday thursday and friday of this week. im trying to restore my energy and fix my sleep. thatll do wonders#i hope. i hope i hope i hope
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dashiellqvverty · 9 months ago
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trying to eat yogurt while i am taking these antibiotics however nondairy yogurt is SO EXPENSIVE and they only sell it in individual cups and im eating 3 a day bc im taking 3 pills a day and ive used up my food stamps
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formulawolff · 2 months ago
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"my hero" - m.v.
pairing: social worker!reader x max verstappen
word count: idek tbh (i’m posting this on my lunch break hehe)
warnings: tooth-rotting fluff, max in bf mode, long distance couple, cursing here and there, mentions of mental health, mentions of mental health disorders, mentions of physical health, yada, yada, yada
a/n: i know i said i was working on requests but this idea would not leave my brain all day. i couldn't stop thinking about it so i had to write it. (it's def a little self-indulgent) i hope y'all enjoy!
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"ah! there you are. i can see you now!""
a giggle bubbles up in your throat, your lips forming a wide smile, "hi baby, how are you?"
he shrugs, the image distorted for about a millisecond. he comes into frame once again, slightly pixelated. however, you can make out the sleepy grin plastered across his face, and the twinkle in his eye as he looks into the camera.
max verstappen, three time world driver’s champion, is on facetime with you, donned in nothing but a black cotton tee and his boxers. you can tell from the background that he’s in his motorhome, settled in his room.
his hair is a disheveled mess, sticking up haphazardly. he more than likely just got out of the shower, as the fabric of the tee clung to his toned frame. underneath his eyes were two faint circles, the skin slightly puffy.
yet, here he was, calling you at god knew what hour just to hear the sound of your voice.
"tired. very fucking tired."
"i can imagine so," you nod, typing along at your laptop, "what time is it there?"
he hums, leaning over his phone, "it's about eleven thirty?"
"max!" your eyes widen, "you need to get some sleep. it's qualifying tomorrow!"
"and?" he counters, arching a brow, "i wanted to hear how your day went. from your messages, it seemed like it was quite eventful."
"i'm just wrapping up my notes now," you exhale, your shoulders slumping slightly, "it was a long day."
"i can imagine my baby," he coos, settling underneath the covers, "tell me all about it."
"i can assure you being a case worker is not nearly as riveting as a formula one driver," you snort, shaking your head, "you go first."
"nope," he was not budging, his attention still fixated solely on you, "tell me about your day, and then i'll share about mine. it's only fair."
"well," you wrinkle your nose, glancing over the open document on your laptop screen, "my day started with one of my clients experiencing a small crisis. she was without food so she called me, asking if i could take her to the nearest pantry. while i was with her, another client of mine called asking if i could transport him to his appointment.
i probably could have, but he reached out to me only fifteen minutes before his appointment time. i received my new staffing form today. i have a couple of clients who are in need of housing so i had to make some calls to some local agencies."
"and how did that go?" you can't help but feel heat flourishing into your cheeks at the intrigue laced in his tone, "were you able to make some progress?"
"not really," you inhale sharply, "housing is really difficult to find right now. it's sort of like when your tires are giving out, but you need them to last a few more laps. you have to remain hopeful so that you can keep pushing."
“i like that analogy,” he fights a yawn, but continues regardless, “that’s a good one. i’m going to use that.”
“as long as you credit me,” you muse, clicking your mousepad as you finalize your note, “how was practice today?”
“so-so,” he chirps, “i missed you a lot today. thought about you nearly every second of the practice session. you’re flying out next week, right?”
you nod, shutting your laptop, “yes. i’ll be leaving wednesday evening and catching a late flight. hopefully when i land, there will be this insanely handsome dutch man waiting for me.”
“is that right?” max’s dimples appear, causing your heart to skip a beat, “i’m hoping that my good luck charm arrives safe and sound. i can’t wait to see her.”
“counting down the minutes are we?”
“you have no idea,” carefully, he plucks his phone from his makeshift stand, bringing you closer into the bed with him, “will you stay on till i fall asleep?”
at his request, there’s a tug at your heart. fuck, if only you were with him. then he would have been able to lay on you until he dozed off. his head would have been snuggled into uour collabone, your hands tangled in his hair, playing with it as his chest steadily rose and fell.
if only you were there. if only you were an influencer or a model. if only you could take work with you, dropping everything to fly all over the world. if only you weren’t separated by time zones, where you had to carefully coordinate facetime calls.
if only you weren’t long distance, then maybe you wouldn’t feel like this.
if only.
“hey,” max’s voice is merely a whisper, “are you okay?”
your lower lip trembles, tears welling up, threatening to spill over. there’s a choking sound, as you attempt to suppress a sob.
yet, it was too late. they were streaming down your cheeks now, your hands instinctively shielding your face.
“baby,” max murmurs, “what’s going on?”
“this shit sucks,” you shake your head, the words strained, “i hate that i’m not with you right now. i hate that we’re long distance. i hate that i have to stay here and—“
“but your clients need you,” his tone is delicate, “you’re the one person they can count on when everything else is going to shit. they need you like i need you. i can tell you had a long day baby, but i’m here. i’m here for you, no matter what.”
“i-i love you,” you manage to sputter out, wiping your cheeks, “i love you, max.”
“and i love you more than you’ll ever know,” in the frame, a pillow is held against his chest, “i’m even cuddling this pillow right now pretending that it’s you.”
“i can’t believe you fell in love with some plain girl from the states,” you sigh, resting your head against the couch cushion, “out of everyone in the world, you happened to fall in love with me.”
“you’re not just any girl from the states,” for a moment, you’re shocked at the firmness in his tone, “you’re my girl. it takes someone special to do what you do. you’re my hero baby. i aspire to be as strong as you.”
“i love you,” the corners of your lips curl into a quaint smile, “am i really your hero?”
“of course,” it doesn’t even take him a second to respond, “like i said, you’re the strongest person i know. you inspire me.”
“i can’t wait to see you,” you murmur, taking note of the way his eyes were drooping, “i’ll stay on till you sleep, my love. it seems like you need it.”
“hey,” one eye opens, barely a slit, “i know this shit sucks right now, but we’ll make it. okay? one day you’ll get to come home to me and tell me all about your day rather than calling. it’ll be worth it. i promise.”
“i hope so. i love you, maxie. sleep well, my love. i’ll be there before you know it.”
“try to have a good evening,” you could barely make out the statement, as he was beginning to doze off, “just end the call when i’m asleep. i’ll message you in the morning.”
“i’ll be here,” opening your laptop, you prop it against the screen, “goodnight, maxie.”
“night, night, baby.”
as sleep takes a hold of the dutch driver, you remain on the call, opening youtube. cautiously, you click on one of your favorite videos. it’s a montage of all of max’s wins, starting from the 2016 spanish grand prix.
the video begins to play, the volume carefully adjusted so that it doesn’t wake him.
as your gaze shifts to your phone once again, you can’t help but hear his words ringing in your ears.
one day this would all be worth it.
and one day, max verstappen would be able to be with his hero.
every single day for the rest of his life.
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dickandballsdotgov · 2 years ago
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Monday, 2/6 workout
Workout type: long run
Distance: 5 mi
Time: 41:26
Pace: 8:15
Song of the day:
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luveline · 1 year ago
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hi! could I request a fic where reader has trouble falling asleep without someone with her? maybe with Hotch or Miguel? like their voices soothe her into sleep? only if you feel like it!! have an amazing day and I adore your writing! 💟💟
hi gorgeous, thank you! ♡ fem
Hotch is rubbing the knots out of his neck when his phone pings with a text. 
Hi, handsome, hopefully you're sleeping, so when you wake up I was wondering if you can send me the photos from last Wednesday to print <3 
He adores your silly electronic heart. 
Hotch clicks your contact and brings the phone to his ear, waiting as the dial trills once. You pick up immediately, sounding sorry and sweet and the slightest bit tired. "Hey. You're awake." 
"Yes, I'm awake, I just got home. Why are you awake? It's four in the morning, honey." 
"You sound very accusatory right now. You're accusing me." 
"Mm. Can I come over, or will you fall asleep before I get there?" 
"Fat chance of that. You're really coming over?" you ask. 
Hotch leaps up the moment he hears the relief in your voice. Something is wrong, and you won't tell him over the phone. He says goodbye gently, dresses less so, and makes an impressively quick journey to your home to put whatever it is back the way it should be. 
You seem in good spirits even though the hollows under your eyes are prominent in the light of the porch, opening your arms for him and hugging him there on the door jam, rumpled under his chin. "You're not wearing a suit." 
"Would you have preferred that?" 
"Only if you were gonna take it off." 
"You'd like that, hmm?" he asks, his teasing at odds with the dulcet cadence of his voice. "I'll dance." 
You giggle into his chest. Hotch grins but quashes it as you look up for a kiss, your lips soft, sweet against his. You kiss his cupid's bow all smushed upward before stepping away from him, your hands drifting together. He pauses to lock the door and take off his shoes. You tug him impatiently back to your room.
Hotch has dreams about your bedroom. There's something about you, the way you climb into bed and sit pretty against the headboard waiting for him to follow you in, innocuous, intensely tempting. He pulls back the sheets and slides in, needling an arm under you to drag you into his side and down onto your back simultaneously. 
"Unnecessary show of strength," you say with a laugh. 
"Just reminding you." 
You turn out your lamp. He squirms to get comfortable. Your mattress is a mess and he's not young enough to bear it without consequence in the morning, but he'll suffer it and worse if it means you'll stay nestled against his side, your cheek at home on his bicep, your arm wrapped around his middle. 
"You'll tell me what's keeping you up?" he asks, hushed. 
"I really don't know how you just know these things…" You give in, because you always give in with him, and (to his credit), he always listens. "I don't think I can sleep without you, Aaron, I really don't." 
"Why? You're not worrying about me, are you?" he asks. 
"No. Of course I am, but that's not the problem. I just struggle without you here. It's easier when you call me, I can fall asleep with you talking to me. But otherwise it's hard." 
"How did you fall asleep before me?" he asks fondly, turning his face to nose at your temple. 
"I'm used to you, I think. I'm spoiled." 
"You aren't spoiled." He pressed his lips to your cheek, eyes closed to breathe you in. "What do you want me to talk about? Think of something soothing." 
"You aren't a man with many soothing stories," you say. 
Hotch tells you about the quieter things in his life, the things that make undertaking the unsaid worthwhile. Jack wants to be Bugs Bunny for Halloween and Hotch has no idea why. Spencer destroyed his computer with a cup of coffee —the problem being the amount of undisolved sugar clumped at the bottom of his cup that found its way into the computers RAM with no hopes of cleaning, rather than the drink itself. His office door squeaks constantly and he's half mad with it, but there's no solution beyond waiting for someone in maintenance to oil the hinge. 
He realises you've fallen asleep somewhere in his stories and he hadn't noticed. He didn't think your confession was wholly true. Perhaps you're stressed, or anxious in a way you haven't shared. And yet you fall asleep as promised from the sound of his voice, your hand scrunched in his shirt like you worry he'll escape you, your eyelid to his arm. Hotch contemplates you as you sleep, pulling the sheets snugly to your chin. He doesn't know if you know this, but you're his sweetheart. He finds you so precious, among a thousand other things, brave and kind and loving, but he knows he's a lucky man. He's the spoiled one. 
If you need his voice to fall asleep to, he'll talk until he's hoarse. And while he's away, he'll have to remember to call. He can't have you missing out on sleep. Hotch kisses the hollow under your eye and tries to sleep too, but he finds he misses the sound of your voice. 
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poisonlove · 9 months ago
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Beauty and the Beast | w.a
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Pairing: wednesday addams x reader
Words: 15k
Warning: reader unsure about her appearance
I felt lonely, so lonely.
But I couldn't risk anyone being scared by my appearance, I couldn't risk receiving mockery and laughter for what I hide beneath the mask. I had to protect myself and others from the horrible monster that I am.
Not even Eugenie, one of my few friends, knew my true face, and I don't think he'll find out anytime soon. Enid tried a couple of times, but after my umpteenth No she gave up, which I'm grateful for.
Why did it have to happen to me? Why do I have to feel scrutinized because of the mask I wear? Damn it, there are vampires, mermaids, and even people without mouths, and yet I'm the only strange one in Nevermore?
"Y/n, have you heard that a new student has arrived?" Eugenie smiles with all thirty-two teeth as he walks beside me, his eyes gleaming with happiness at the news. "Is it really important?" I ask timidly, biting my lower lip amused by his reaction.
"An extra girl is always welcome," he sighs dreamily. "Maybe she'll even like bees, don't you think?" He asks hopefully.
I tilt my head to the side and watch Eugenie smile widely, hope in his eyes. "I…" I start, feeling a  pressure in my chest from his enthusiasm, "I guess so?" I say, chuckling timidly, not wanting to spoil my friend's good mood.
"I mean, I adore you, really," Eugenie says, adjusting his glasses on the bridge of his nose, "but having one more girl in our group would be cool!" He says, analyzing me carefully.
"It's just the two of us… We're not even a trio, and you're talking about a group?" I roll my eyes at his comment, and Eugenie gives me a friendly elbow on the side.
"There's no use rolling your eyes, you know I can see you, right? I mean… besides your mouth, and the other thing that can be seen under the mask," he says sing-song, looking at my mask reluctantly.
"And anyway! We're three!" The boy pouts adorably.
"Really?" I ask in surprise, and Eugenie nods. "Enid," he says, smiling in love at the mention of the blonde werewolf.
I open my mouth ready to retort, but I just ended up sighing loudly.
"Y/n," I turn towards the sound of the voice and see Enid gesturing for me to come closer to her. I raise an eyebrow with confusion and look at Eugenie shrugging indifferently. "Go on, I'll go check on my bees," he says, giving me a pat on the shoulder and walking towards his target, humming a tune.
I approach Enid, who smiles excitedly. "Hi Enid, everything okay?" I ask with a small smile on my lips.
"Y/n! I finally found you!" Enid exclaims, "I have some great news to tell you. You see, the new student is named Wednesday Addams and she'll be my new roommate!"
I feel a knot in my stomach at the thought of facing a new acquaintance, but I try to remain calm. "Wednesday Addams?" I repeat, trying to hide the anxiety that begins to creep up inside me.
"Exactly!" Enid confirms enthusiastically, "It would be fantastic if you two could become friends. I know you're a bit reserved, but I'm sure you'll get along well together!" The blonde smiled widely, her blue eyes looking at me attentively.
I try to mask my discomfort in front of Enid's enthusiasm, but inside, I feel a growing sense of unease. It's not fear, it's just a deep reluctance to interact with new people, especially when I have to hide my true identity behind a mask.
"Are you sure it's a good idea?" I ask uncertainly, the memory of Yoko staring at me strangely still vivid in my mind, sending shivers down my spine. I look at Enid curiously, seeking reassurance.
"With Yoko, it was just a small mishap," Enid replies, laughing nervously, able to read what I was thinking during my silence. "It's not your fault if you're so different."
"Right," I mumble to myself, still troubled by the memory of the episode with Yoko.
"I think it'll be different," continues Enid, placing her hand on my arm and starting to walk towards our dorms, "Wednesday has a… special character. You might like her," she adds with a broad smile.
"Are you telling me she's strange?" I ask, feeling offended by her description. Enid looks at me sideways, trying to reassure me.
"No, I didn't mean that," Enid clarifies, "just that she's also shy, and I think you two could get along," she concludes, smiling happily.
"But do we have to go now?" I ask with a worried tone, feeling the need to mentally prepare for the impending meeting. "Of course! I talked about you when she arrived, I think she's writing now," Enid babbles thoughtfully.
"She's writing?" I ask incredulously, a small smile threatening to spread across my lips. The thought of someone actually writing seems surreal to me.
"You see? You haven't even met yet and you already have something in common," Enid says, smiling kindly and looking at me with eyes overflowing with happiness.
As we head towards Ophelia Hall, nervousness grows inside me and my hands start to sweat. My heart beats faster and faster as the moment of meeting Wednesday approaches. I don't know what to expect, and the uncertainty makes me even more agitated.
Enid opens the door and my eyes immediately fall on the room divided in half by a black ribbon, separating two opposite worlds. Enid's side, bright and colorful, contrasts sharply with the darkness of the opposite side.
"The room is… Different," I say timidly, blinking in disbelief.
"Yeah, I was mad the first time too," Enid says with a reluctant sigh, evidently annoyed by the division of the room.
"Wednesday! I want to introduce you to someone," Enid announces, turning her gaze to her roommate on the other side of the ribbon.
Wednesday, focused on the typewriter, emits a small grunt before turning towards us with a rigid and impenetrable posture.
Her dark hair is braided into two impeccable braids that fall on her shoulders with precision and order. Her face is pale, almost ethereal, but her eyes are intense, deep, and penetrating. Her posture is rigid, but she exudes a silent confidence, as if she is aware of her inner power. The air around her seems filled with mystery and fascination, and even though her gaze is cold and distant, there is something about her that attracts and fascinates. It's as if she's enveloped in an aura of darkness, yet at the same time of strength and determination.
Her black eyes scan my figure, and I feel the warmth rising to my cheeks with embarrassment. Thank goodness Wednesday can't see it. I breathe deeply, relieved.
"What is she?" Wednesday asks with sharp curiosity, analyzing me with her gaze.
"Wednesday! You need to be more polite," Enid scolds her, but Wednesday ignores her with indifference.
My heart begins to beat faster as Wednesday approaches me, nervousness growing with each step she takes. Her presence, even silent, seems to envelop me in an atmosphere of mystery and tension, making me feel as if I'm under her scrutinizing gaze.
"You're not a vampire, a werewolf… not even a mermaid…" she mutters softly, her eyes scrutinizing mine intensely.
Her gaze is piercing, full of determination and fascination. "What are you?" she repeats, her voice neutral but curiosity palpable in the air.
I feel cornered, a knot forming in my throat, tightening.
Spontaneously, Wednesday reaches out and places her hands on my face, the tips of her fingers delicately touching my mask.
"Don't," I say in a low but sharp voice, trying to dissuade her.
Wednesday tilts her head slightly, ignoring my request, and brushes her fingers against the mask, exploring its texture with curiosity. Her hand wraps around my mask, and the contact sends shivers down my spine.
My breath becomes irregular as Wednesday continues to examine my mask with care, as if she wants to unveil the secret hidden beneath it. The touch of her fingers on my skin makes me feel vulnerable, exposed to her penetrating gaze.
"Please, stop," I whisper again, trying to control the agitation in my voice.
Wednesday doesn't seem at all disturbed by my request, continuing to explore the mask with an almost scientific curiosity. Her impassive face betrays no emotion, but I can feel my heart pounding in my chest as I feel increasingly exposed in front of her.
"Wednesday, stop," says Enid firmly but gently, approaching us. "Y/n has her reasons for wearing that mask, and it's not right for you to force her to reveal it if she doesn't want to."
Wednesday turns to Enid, her cold and distant gaze piercing through her. "I'm not forcing anything," she replies calmly, "I'm just trying to understand."
Enid stands between me and Wednesday, shielding me with her body. "I understand, Wednesday, but there are better ways to get the answers you seek," she retorts, trying to defuse the situation.
I feel relieved by Enid's support, but at the same time anxious about how the situation will unfold.
After a moment of tense silence, Wednesday turns her back and walks away, heading towards the desk with measured steps. A sigh of relief escapes my lips as I sink into a nearby chair.
"What an embarrassing moment," I say with a nervous smile, trying to break the ice.
Enid approaches and places a hand on my shoulder with an expression of solidarity. "Don't worry, Y/n. Wednesday can be a bit… intense at times," she comments with a half-smile.
"You said it," I reply with a small smile, grateful for Enid's support.
On the other side of the room, the incessant ticking of Wednesday's typewriter continues unabated, creating a constant background to our conversation. Her silent presence seems to have added a new dimension to the room, making it even more charged with mystery and tension.
"What do you say we go for a walk outside?" Enid suggests, trying to distract my mind from tumultuous thoughts.
"That sounds like a good idea," I respond with a grateful smile, happy to escape from that tense atmosphere. We rise and leave the room, leaving behind the constant ticking of Wednesday's typewriter.
She seems like an interesting girl I thought to myself
but she really doesn't give up
(…)
Weeks have passed since that first tense encounter with Wednesday, yet her obsession with uncovering what lay beneath my mask showed no signs of abating. Occasionally, during classes or in moments of break, I catch her staring at me with her piercing gaze, as if she wanted to pierce through the fabric of my mask and read my deepest thoughts.
Wednesday doesn't give up easily. She made various attempts: sending anonymous messages, appearing out of nowhere at the most unexpected times, sending Things, and even trying to remove my mask with a sudden gesture. Her questions become more frequent and casual, as if she wanted to uncover my secret through the most mundane conversation.
Flashback
During a break between classes, while I was sitting alone in a corner of the cafeteria, I felt a presence approaching. I looked up and saw Wednesday with her mysterious and aloof demeanor.
"May I sit here?" she asked calmly, indicating the seat across from me.
"Of course, go ahead," I replied, surprised by her sudden company.
Wednesday sat down with a fluid and silent movement, and for a moment we simply looked at each other, without saying a word. Then, without a smile or a greeting nod, she said, "How are you?"
"Quite well, thank you," I replied, trying to hide my surprise at finding her there.
That brief conversation remained imprinted in my mind for days, like an unsolved riddle. Yet, despite her seemingly insatiable interest in my mask, Wednesday did not seem at all frightened or disgusted by me. She was just… curious.
Flashback end
But then, without any warning, Wednesday stops altogether circling around me. She no longer approaches me with her questions or scrutinizing looks. I was left to wonder:
was I boring? Rude? Was I just being paranoid?
"It seems like she's gotten tired of you," Enid jokes, trying to lighten the mood. "Maybe she's finally realized that beneath that mask, it's just you, and nothing so terrifying."
Enid's joke made me smile, but it didn't completely dissipate the tension that had built up inside me. I was nervous about the various conjectures swirling in my head, and I literally asked myself too many questions that had no answer.
"Thank goodness you found something to laugh about," I remarked, trying to conceal my mood.
Enid looked at me with a sympathetic expression. "You know, Y/n, I think you're reading too much into things. Maybe Wednesday has just found something else to focus on, or maybe she's decided she doesn't want to make you uncomfortable."
I wanted to believe Enid's words, but doubt continued to nag at me. "Maybe you're right," I replied, trying to convince myself.
"I promise that if there's anything to worry about, I'll let you know," Enid said sincerely, placing a comforting hand on my shoulder.
I felt somewhat relieved by her promise, but I knew that until I had answers to my questions, my mind would continue to race incessantly. It was frustrating not knowing what was going through Wednesday's mind, but I had to find a way to stop tormenting myself with suppositions and hypotheses.
That afternoon, I found myself in Enid's room, determined to clear things up with Wednesday. The tension in the air was palpable as I tried to gather the courage to confront the situation.
"Wednesday, can I talk to you?" I asked, trying to stay calm despite my pounding heart.
The girl looked up from the book she was reading and glanced at me with detachment. "Sure," she replied simply, showing no sign of interest. Her eyes returned to the pages of the book she was reading.
"Why aren't you talking to me anymore?" I asked, feeling my voice tremble slightly with emotion.
Wednesday didn't even look up from her book. "I can't be friends with a girl who doesn't show her face," she said coldly, as if it were obvious.
Those words hit me like a punch to the gut. "You can't really think like that," I replied, trying to control my growing frustration. "I'm not just my mask, Wednesday. There's much more beneath it."
Wednesday remained impassive, and her indifference deeply hurt me. "You don't even listen to me," I whispered, feeling my heart breaking.
The girl didn't respond, continuing to read as if I were invisible. Frustration and anger welled up inside me, but in the end, I gave up.
With a sigh, I realized I had to accept the situation for what it was. "Maybe you're right," I admitted softly. "But you can't judge without knowing the truth." Wednesday looked up from her book, looking at me with a certain curiosity. "And what would the truth be?" she asked, her eyebrows slightly furrowed.
"The truth… I'm afraid," I replied, feeling a lump in my throat as my hands trembled slightly. With determination, I placed them on the mask, ready to reveal what I had hidden for so long.
Damn feelings I developed for you, persistent Goth I thought bitterly.
Wednesday watched carefully, her black eyes scrutinizing my face with intense curiosity. My heart pounded in my chest, silently praying that she would accept what she was about to see.
With a deep breath, I slowly removed the mask, revealing my true face. Behind it, a hideous scar extended from my eyebrow to my cheek, thankfully sparing my eye. It was a wound I had carried for years, a witness to a painful past that I had never shared with anyone.
Wednesday remained still, her eyes fixed on my scar. Her expression was inscrutable, but I could see surprise in her eyes.
The scar was large and deep, and I couldn't help but feel vulnerable as Wednesday examined it. But there was no more room to hide the truth, and I had to accept her judgment, whatever it may be.
Wednesday closed the book and approached me slowly, her gaze still fixed on the scar adorning my face. Her expression was a mixture of curiosity and shyness, as if she were unsure of what to do or say.
"Can I touch it?" she asked in a barely audible voice, and I nodded weakly, feeling my cheeks flush at her question.
With cautious movements, Wednesday came even closer, her fingers delicately touching my scarred skin. A shiver ran down my spine at the contact, but it wasn't disgust or fear. It was a feeling of calm and acceptance, as if that gesture meant something deeper than just physical contact.
I looked at her face as she examined the scar. Her eyes were full of empathy and understanding, and I couldn't help but let out a sigh of relief. It was as if I had finally found someone who truly understood me, without judging or condemning.
It was hard to believe that all this had happened because I had fallen in love with her. But now, looking at her up close like this, I realized that maybe it was worth risking my heart for someone who made me feel so alive and accepted.
"How did you get it?" Wednesday asked timidly, slightly clenching her jaw as she continued to observe the scar on my face.
My voice trembled slightly. "It was done by my father," I confessed, feeling the lump in my throat tighten. "He was drunk and one night he lost control."
My voice broke slightly as I remembered those painful moments, the fear and despair I had felt. But I knew I had to share the truth with Wednesday, even if it hurt to revisit those memories.
Wednesday gently caressed my cheek, the touch of her fingers on my scarred skin sending a slight shiver down my spine. "Why did you keep it hidden?" she asked with curiosity, her gaze still full of compassion.
"It's horrible…" I replied softly, feeling the weight of my words. "When everyone looked at me strangely or laughed, I decided to cover it up."
Wednesday's finger brushed against the scar on my eyebrow and a shiver ran down my spine. It was as if that simple gesture was breaking down the barriers I had built around me for years.
"It makes you strong," said Wednesday, tilting her head to the side as she looked at me intently. "And you're… Beautiful all the same."
Her words struck me deeply, and I felt my cheeks blush slightly at her unexpected compliment. It was hard to believe that someone could find beauty in that ugly scar, but with Wednesday beside me, I began to see myself with different eyes.
"Thank you," I replied sincerely, my heart filled with gratitude for her kindness. It was a moment of intimacy and sharing that I would never forget.
"Does Enid know?" Wednesday asked with curiosity, and I shook my head.
"No," I replied, feeling a shiver of nervousness run through my body.
"Are you afraid of her reaction?" she asked timidly, and I nodded slowly.
"If she says something, I'll kill her," said Wednesday with a serious tone, and I couldn't help but smile, feeling for the first time confident and beautiful for myself.
And beautiful for Wednesday.
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twig-tea · 3 months ago
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GL odds and ends 6 October 2024
I haven't been as good at posting about shows as I wanted to be, so I'm trying a round-up format instead because it feels like a lot of GLs skirt under the radar. It's exciting that we're in a time when there's enough GL airing that it's worth doing a round-up! This was a great week for the lesbians to figure themselves out, so it feels like a good week to start. No idea how regularly I'll do this, need to figure out a cadence that makes sense.
Currently airing (with thoughts up to Oct 6):
Reverse 4 U 5/8 (Thai, Tuesdays 1:00 PM EDT, Netflix / YouTube) This week the girls finally sorted themselves and we got set up for the main plot to start next week. I was initially really stoked about this one and then a little bummed that it's not taking it's very cool premise and the stakes it establishes as seriously as it could be, but I'm still hoping it will start to have real stakes in the main plot stretch.
The Two of Us s2 ep 6/6 END (Thai, 29 Aug-3 Oct 2024, YouTube) It was so great seeing women in their 40s being romantic together but I did not love the plot of this one; I find their romantic conflicts too juvenile (lots of easily-triggered jealousy). The moments they're being sweet are great though.
Unlock Your Love ep 4/8 (Thai, Wednesdays, GagaOOLala / YouTube [cut version]) This is the first episode that this series felt a little more assured; I liked the series this production company produced with a short run time, it feels like this series has been worse off for its longer episodes. That being said, when these couples get to do their thing like in this episode, they have good chemistry.
Chaser Game W s2 ep 3/8 (Japanese, Thursdays 12:30 PM EDT, GagaOOLala) @lurkingshan is already doing a great summary of this week to week in her JQL weekly round-up!
Affair the series ep 6/8 (Thai, Fridays 11:15 AM EDT, iQIYI/ YouTube) Finally! I liked that it was Ek pointing out that Wan was unhappy the entire time she was gone that finally got Pleng to give in to her desire to be with Wan. This show is so melodramatic but the emotional threads follow and the character motivations are clear and consistent; I'm enjoying it in spite of not loving melodramatic storylines in general. It helps that the acting in this one is excellent.
The Loyal Pin ep 10/16 (Thai, Sundays 12:15 PM EDT, YouTube) Glad we finally got confirmation of Patt's history! And I'm relieved Anin knows she has an ally, though I feel like it's given her false confidence that worries me. These two are stressing me out by how bad they are at being careful but I do love how desperate they are for each other, as well as how beautiful this show is.
Red Whisper ep 2/8 (Korea, Wednesdays and Sundays, YouTube) Starting with cheating is not my fave but is par for the course with these SukFilm short series; my fave so far has been their first GL so if you haven't seen that yet I'd honestly recommend that instead.
Recent One-offs
Out of Breath (re-release in a bingeable version; Korean, YouTube) Highly recommended! Also the creator, Soo not Sue, announced she's working on another series to hopefully air before the end of the year, which I am super stoked about.
The Suffering of Xiqing Mountain (Chinese (censored), YouTube)
Sastra film app YouTube channel has several short Cambodian GL series that come out weekly Honestly they are not to my taste but I don't like gatekeeping GL especially from smaller markets. I check in on these time to time and if there are any that I think are great I'll give them a shout-out
Ditto above with JPC media YouTube channel for Thai GL shorts if there are any that stand out to me I'll say so
Recently ended that I haven't had the wherewithal to write about:
Hoshikuzu Telepath (fansub) Thank you to @yuiyuihan for your hard work making it possible to watch this series! I I haven't read the original manga but I do know they changed the kiss communication to a forehead rest; Unsurprised that this adaptation, starring idols in the same group, would be left ambiguous in terms of whether their feelings are friendly or romantic. I liked what this series was trying to say, but in all honestly didn't love the execution. It's too bad because I absolutely love the concept of an alien being helped by girls obsessed with building rockets.
The Secret of Us 8 eps [complete] (24 Jun-15 Aug 2024, YouTube) I first included this in my recommendations from the summer and then retracted, but I ended up liking this series and then never updated again. So to set the record straight: Though it lost me in the middle, the ending on this series won be back over. I really appreciated the way this series handled filial piety and balancing that against personal happiness. I appreciated SO MUCH that the main characters decided together how to handle Lada's situation with her mother. I finally understood too late that Earn believed the lies Lada's mother told her in ep1, and that affected some of their decisions in the middle of the series. I still think the execution was wobbly, but the acting and chemistry between the two leads carries this series through. This has some of the best domestic fluff in any GL, as well as my favourite GL counter lift to date. And it's gorgeous. Tentatively recommended with the caveat that you do have to either enjoy or power through the melodrama in the middle.
Starting soon:
Apple My Love, Thai, 12 October, GagaOOLala
Pluto, Thai, 19 October, VIU
The Nipple Talk, Taiwanese, 1 November GagaOOLala
My Ex's Wedding [in theatres in Thailand 14 November]
Petrichor, Thai, 23 November, TBD
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d6volution · 1 year ago
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Ok, so reader (somehow) gets her hands on a cute bunny lingerie. It's got fishnet tights and a headband and a cute little cotton tail. What better use for it than to tease Jax with it? Surely he won't pin her down and fuck her into next Wednesday, right?
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ive decided to combine these two asks, 🤭 hopefully that is okay. enjoy.
tags: pregnancy, pregnant!reader, miscommunication, dry humping, lingerie, jax in heat
minors dni.
It's strange, ever since you got pregnant with Jax's kits he's.. been avoiding you, well. Not necessarily but he's been trying not to overwhelm you? Yes, maybe that's it. You really couldn't tell, he acted strange around you as of late. Trying to keep his distance but, still caring for you tooth and nail. You couldn't help but feel like your swelling tummy and changing body was becoming.. unattractive for him? You weren't that far along.. you tummy only just began to sprout a small baby bump.
His touches no longer lingered and his body language was the opposite of what it used to be. Maybe he was a bit distressed about .. becoming a father? You felt like you needed to calm him down, help him relax like he's been helping you.
You decided to take things into your own hands, you wanted to feel sexy for him again. And you had an idea.
Knock, knock knock.
Ragatha opened the door and you stood there timdly, "Hi.. is this a bad time?"
"What, no no— Of course not, come in y/n." She ushered you inside with a kind smile and you both got comfortable in her room. You explained your situation and like the good friend she was, the doll completely understood.
"Give me a day or two, and it'll be done alright? Don't think too much, Jax... can be very confusing sometimes." She reassured you, and you exited her room soon after. Running into Jax just outside of the hall.
"H.. Hey, doll, how ya feelin'?" He asked, avoiding eye contact and rubbing the back of his neck.
"I'm fine, are you alright Jax..? You've seemed.. distant—"
"Hang on doll, I'll get right back to ya." He spotted Kinger and used this as a means to escape your questioning.. and that confirmed that you weren't imagining his strange behavior.
The days went by, and soon your 'package' from ragatha was ready. It was a bunny themed lingerie set. You were flustered when she delivered it but thanked her all the same.
Today would be the day you'd capture Jax's attention, one way or another.
You waited until it was late enough, late enough that Jax would return to your room soon. It became a routine to make sure you were okay and had everything you needed before bed. During this time you slipped into the lingerie.. it hugged your body, your curves and put them on display deliciously. You felt your heart race, was this too much..? No you couldn't back down now.
You heard footsteps and quickly shuffled to get onto the bed, assuming a suggestive pose.
Jax walked in.
"Hey babe just checkin' in—  .... on... you.." His voice trailed off and his eyes were glued to your form. He swallowed and quickly shut the door behind him, "What's all this toots..?" He sounded, nervous. It wasn't like him. He gripped his own wrist as if to hold himself back and you subtly noticed this..
"I.. I wanted to surprise you.." You stuttered out nervously. "I wanted your attention and you seemed to be.. avoiding me.."
Jax was silent, his compsure was slipping. Seeing you in this outfit, your legs your tummy .. your neck your entire body. He couldn't do it. He was doing so well before but this? It was too much. The man nearly pounced on you. In the blink of the eye he was pinning you down, his breathing heavy.
"You don't understand, doll. I've been doin' this for your own sake.. look at you." He breathed, holding your wrists down and gently squeezing them. "Walkin' around in those tight little shorts all day now this? Heh.. you must want me to [censor] another set of kits into you." He nearly growled, his knee pushing your legs open so he could close the space between you both and rut against your crotch.
He was throbbing, his dick straining against his clothes painfully.
"I haven't been avoiding you on purpose doll, my heat came back.. I didn't.. want to overwhelm you, but if ya think im gonna hold back after this your dead wrong." He whispered into your ear.
"T.. Take me Jax, please.. I need you," You whimpered, arms wrapping around him.
"The things you do to me.. hng.." He was already losing himself just dry humping your crotch, he had been holding himself back for a while now. "J.. Just stay still, doll—" His hand caressed your stomach. His ego swelling when he felt the curve of your baby bump beneath his fingertips. Jax grunted, his face more flushed than yours now. You felt the warmth between your legs grow even more. He came in his pants...
"J.. Jax.." you whined, squriming beneath him in need.
"I know, babe.. I know.. Im gettin there." He was trembling , removing his overalls.
"Let's pump you full some more, yeah?"
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radioisntdead · 8 months ago
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Adore
Alastor x reader
Warnings:
This is short, not my best work I WILL REDEEM MYSELF. Alastor is implied to break in at the end.
Good evening folks!
APOLOGIES FOR THIS BEING DELAYED, I accidentally deleted the whole thing and then I just laid on Barnaby out of defeat and slept.
ANYWAYS HERE'S WEDNESDAY'S ANGST, or Wednesday's poor excuse for angst, the original was better.
I'll be posting another angst fic later today, hopefully, it's either gonna be with Lute or another Alastor one
Song
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A-one, two, three, four
You completely and utterly adored Alastor, how could you not?
He was quite charming! Sure he was a cannibalistic murderer but that for some reason wasn't a deal breaker for you.
A side effect from being in hell probably or possibly because you were just as screwed up as he was just in a different format!
Everything you do, it sends me
You had met him while working at Rosie's emporium, Rosie had asked you to make some tea while she taught Alastor the newest slang she had gathered.
Higher than the moon with every twinkle in your eye
Turns out you both had so much in common!
Both of you had gained deer attributes after your fall to eternal damnation, had a strong distaste for the lustful cravings of the flesh, thought cannibalism was neat, Rosie was a dear friend, and held a fondness and strong preference for the years you were alive.
You strike a match that lights my heart on fire
Rosie being the matchmaker she was decided to nudge the two of you together, after all she saw how well you and Alastor matched together, and it worked! Of course it did.
When you're near, I hide my blushing face
You and Alastor fit together perfectly, like pillows and blankets, like shoes and laces.
And trip on my shoelaces
He'd take you dancing, hand gently placed on your waist when you would dance more classically, or you'd have arms and legs frailing around like a octopus when you'd give more energetic dances a try.
Grace just isn't my forté
The two of you enjoyed cooking together in the kitchen, Jambalaya, curries, biscuits and gravy, pasta, gumbo, baked breads and whatever else you could think of, you made together.
But it brings me to my knees when you say
You'd help Alastor out with his radio broadcast, by either proofreading his scripts or finding an unfortunate sinner to make an appearance with their screams.
Hello, how are you, my darling, today?
You didn't know where things went wrong, everything was going well!
I fall into a pile on the floor, deer love is hard to ignore
At least you thought so, the last day you spent with Alastor the two of you had made a lovely dinner together, you had set the table with fresh flowers, a candle or two.
When every little thing you do, I do adore
After dinner the two of you danced to some jazzy song from his era, and he twirled you around.
We're as different as can be
His hand holding yours.
I've noticed you're remarkably murdery and I'm slightly less murdery
His red eyes staring adoringly into yours.
We balance out each other nicely
You gave him a kiss on the cheek before you went to sleep that night.
You wear fancy shoes in the snow
You had awoken in the morning and Alastor wasn't there.
You assumed he had stepped out and he'd be back soon.
In mid-July, I still feel cold
But as the clock continued to tick and the red skies turned into a deeper red you were worried but you knew he could handle himself maybe he just got caught up in something? Perhaps with that TV guy he was 'friends' with?
We're opposites in every way
Hours turned into days and days into weeks,
No one had heard from nor had they seen Alastor.
You looked everywhere for him, asking around, desperately trying to find out where he went.
but I can't resist it when you say
Vox apparently tried to get him to join his little V themed posse and Alastor rejected him, rather harshly and also broke his little TV antenna while he was at it.
Hello, how are you, my darling, today?
Rosie hadn't heard from him either, and obviously you wouldn't be asking around if you knew where he was.
I fall into a pile on the floor
Weeks turned into months and before you knew it those months became years.
He was just gone, leaving only traces of his existence.
Puppy love is hard to ignore, when every little thing you do, I do adore
For the first few years you would frequently pop into his radio tower, hoping that maybe, just maybe he would be there for some reason, and when he undoubtedly wasn't, you cleaned the place up, keeping it in tip top shape.
Finding words, I mutter
Once it hit the five year mark you stopped popping in, allowing dust and whatever else to consume the radio tower untill further notice.
Tongue-tied, twisted
You stopped hoping that Alastor would just waltz on into your shared home, with that yellowed grin of his and static following.
Hoove in mouth, I start to stutter, Ha, ha, Heaven help me
You stopped looking for Alastor.
Hello, how are you, my darling, today?
Seven years, he was gone for seven years,
He was back and he didn't have the decency to even pay you a visit? You had to hear about his return from him publicly beefing with Vox.
I fall into a pile on the floor, Puppy love is hard to ignore
If Alastor wasn't going to come find you then you wouldn't go out of your way to find him either, even if that hazbin hotel where he was residing was only a 30 minute walk away.
When every little thing you do, I do adore
Alastor didn't intentionally ghost you, his absence was only supposed to be for a short while.
Unfortunately he was foolish enough to make a deal that had kept him away from you for seven long years, his dear friend Rosie had been kind enough to fill him in on your activities since his disappearance but not before scolding him harshly for not even having the decency to send a postcard.
Every little thing, ba-ba-ba-ba
He had been back for a time now, how rude of him to not pay his dearest a visit! After all you were looking for him until recent years right?
Every little thing, ba-ba-ba-ba
Alastor was someone you completely and utterly adored once.
And unfortunately he still adored you to some degree considering he was standing in front of you in the doorway of the house you had once shared, he was as smiley as ever, his grin grew larger as he saw your confused expression.
"Good evening my darl-" he was interrupted by you slamming the door in his face.
Every little thing you do, I do adore
It seems you weren't as excited to see him as he expected, oh well! Good thing for him that you didn't bother to change the locks.
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Good evening folks my apologies, this is more comedic then angsty, hope you enjoyed though I will redeem myself.
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glorious-spoon · 4 months ago
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WIP Wednesday
@fraddit, @inell, @exhuastedpigeon, @wildlife4life and probably a few other people tagged me for WIP games recently!
this is from a prompt fill that i meant to post today and will probably HOPEFULLY post tomorrow. featuring angst and worry and all that good stuff.
-
"Hey, Eddie," Buck mumbles. He blinks a couple of times, but his eyes are having some trouble focusing. Eddie's face blurs before him, then settles. Wind-burnt cheeks, wide, wet, beautiful eyes. Chest heaving like he's been sprinting a lot farther than across the parking lot. "Sorry."
Eddie swears under his breath and steps closer as the paramedic lifts her stethoscope away with a deep sigh.
"I'll give you two a moment," she says. 
"I'm sorry," Buck says again, and Eddie says, "Fuck, Jesus Christ, don't be sorry," and heaves him into a hug. It's tight enough to be uncomfortable, as sore as he is, but Eddie is warm and breathing quick against his hair as his hands pat over Buck's back like he's checking for injuries and then just clutch at him, and Buck thinks he could probably happily stay here forever.
"I didn't mean to scare you," he mumbles.
A slightly crazed-sounding laugh escapes Eddie.
-
no-pressure tagging everyone above, plus @alessandriana, @sibylsleaves, @ponyregrets, @daffi-990 and @lesbianrobin
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cherrycola27 · 6 months ago
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A Favor Among Friends
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Series Warnings: Language, alcohol consumption, historical inaccuracies. Regency era men and ideals. Eventual Smut. RegencyEra!AU Banner Credit @thedroneranger
Masterlist Previous Part Next Part
...........................................
Chapter 2: The Offer
Your heart leaped in your chest when Bradley walked into the room. He brought your daisies, your favorite flower. He brought some lilacs for your mother and a bottle of wine from his travels for your father.
Sitting with him in the drawing room, talking felt so easy, so natural. You knew that he was the one for you. If you had it your way, by the end of the season, you'd be his Viscountess. You were giddy at the thought.
Bradley was just about to leave when your brother and his wife walked in. Eddie immediately asked to speak to Bradley in the study to catch up, you presumed. So, you excused yourself and took your sister-in-law by the hand and led her to the sewing room so you could show her the latest embroidery piece you'd been working on. Once you were married, you'd be able to join her sewing circle.
"Edmund! It's so good to see you!" Bradley exclaimed as he walked into the study. "What are you doing here, Bradshaw?" Your brother asked him harshly. Bradley looked at him puzzled.
"I'm calling on your sister. I intend to court her and take her as my wife." Bradley said as if it was the most obvious thing.
"No." Eddie deadpanned. "No? What do you mean, no?" Bradley asked him. "No, you cannot court, my sister, and you most certainly cannot take her as your wife. I will not allow it!" Edmund state.
"I don't believe that is your choice, Mister Beaumont. I believe the say is your father's, Lord Beaumont. Bradley narrowed his eyes.
"She is my sister! My baby sister! And I am your best friend. You have known her all of her life, and she was like a sister to you! Which is why I don't understand why you would want to court her. And as far as having her marry someone I know, I'd much rather her marry a stranger than my best friend whom I know all about. I know every triste and affair you have had Bradshaw. And my sister deserves an honorable man. Someone who will be faithful to her." Your brother exasperated.
"I have my father's ear. He will listen to me." Eddie bit back. "Why can I not court Ducky? She is a wonderful woman who is well accomplished in many talents and has been a friend to me my whole life! Surely you would rather her marry someone you know than someone you don't?" Bradley asked your brother.
"You think I am not honorable? I am a gentleman, and unlike many men of the Ton, I have no bastard children. And I would be faithful to Ducky." Bradley argues back.
"Bradley," your brother sighs, "you are a rake. You have been since we were six-and-ten, when your mother passed. I am not saying that you are a bad person. But I know that it is not a lifestyle you will be able to give up. I know I am being harsh, but you are not good enough for my sister, and you will only break her heart. So please. As your friend, I am asking you not to call on her again." Eddie finished.
Bradley clenched his jaw. "Fine." He walked to the door and paused. "I'll be taking my leave now. Bid your family a good day for me." He said before storming out.
..............
You were saddened that you didn't get to give Bradley a proper goodbye, but hopefully, you would see him again.
Rainy weather kept everyone inside for a week, but on a fine Wednesday morning, the sun broke through the clouds and brought new life back to the Ton.
That afternoon, your mother insisted that you go to Market Square and promenade with her and your brother and hopefully find a suitor.
You looked and saw that Eddie and your mother had stopped for a refreshment, so you quickly walked over and looped your arm with Bradley's.
You wore a golden yellow dress with fine beadwork, some white lace gloves, and your hair swept up away from your face. You were walking slightly ahead of your brother and mother when you spotted Lord Harrington coming down the path towards you. You curled your nose at the thought of promonading with him and quickly looked around for a way out. Just across the path, you spotted a familiar frame.
He was startled to see you. "Ducky? What are you doing?" He asked you.
"Lord Harrington was about to come ask me to promenade with him, and I would rather jump in the pond. Which is quite the risk because I cannot swim." You giggle.
Bradley laughed at you before escorting you to your family.
"Lady Beaumont, Mister Beaumont," Bradley nodded to them. "I was hoping I could escort Miss Beaumont through Market Square this afternoon. Would that be alright?" He asked.
"Of course!" Your mother cheered and smiled at him. Eddie smiled too, but you couldn't help but notice how pained he looked.
"Thank you." You whisper to Bradley. "Lord Harrington is determined to have me has his third wife and refuse to be it." You say. "You are not someone's third wife. You are someone's first and only wife." Bradley said to you. You smiled and turned away from him, fearing the blush in your cheeks would give away the crush you had on him.
"You know, we have to stop meeting like this, Lord Bradshaw." You chuckle as you curl your arm tighter around his.
"What ever do you mean, Ducky?" He asks you, still using that nickname he gave you all those years ago. You turn slightly to see your mother and brother walking a few feet behind you.
"I mean," you drop your voice to a whisper, "I swept you into to promenading with me through Market Square to avoid a suitor, just like you swept me onto the dance floor at the first ball of the season."
"I didn't hear any complaining from you when I did. However, if you'd like, I could always find someone else." Bradley chuckled and lifted his hand as if he was going to pull away. "No!" You said hastily, clapping your hand down over his. He let out a chuckle and shook his head. He enjoyed spending time with you, truly.
He turned back for a moment to see your brother shooting daggers at him. Bradley shook his head. You were the one who pursued him this time, but your brother didn't know that.
...........
Three months. It had been three months since the first ball of the season, and you had yet to secure a proposal from Bradley. He hadn't called on on you since the first ball, but he'd danced with you and each one since then. Always two dances. One quatrain, one waltz.
Each time was always magical, yet he'd neglected to call in you again. Unfortunately, Lord Harrington had called on you three other times. Each one worse than the prior visit.
However, as you sat at your vanity, you hoped that Bradley's mind had changed. He promised you that he would be at your home this week and your parents had told you to wear something "elegant" because they had news for you this afternoon.
You donned a beautiful emerald green dress with pearl adornments your mother loaned to you. As you descended the stairs, you heard voices and in the drawing room. They seemed to be in high spirits.
You took a deep breath and plastered a huge smile on your face as you walked in the room, only for it to drop at who you saw sitting with your parents.
"Lord Harrington." You grimaced. "Miss Beaumont, wonderful to see you again. Forgive me for not being able to stay longer, but I must leave." He said the moment you walked in.
"It's quite alright." You half smiled as he took his hat and kissed your hand to bid you goodbye.
"Darling, come sit." Your mother said. "We have some news, Y/N." Your father said as you sat down. "Lord Harrington has ask for your hand. He has made quite the offer."
"What? Have you accepted it? You told me I had until the end of the season, and we are only halfway through!" You shouted, smacking your hand on the table.
"Darling," your mother began, "we have not accepted his offer, but it is the only offer we have had all season. And, there is no telling how long it will be available. So, your father and I have decided that if you do not secure a match in two weeks, your betrothal to Lord Harrington will be official."
"No, no! He is old enough to be my father. How could you allow that. He has a lesser statis than we do!" You protested.
"He has a sizable estate and is willing to talk a dowry significantly smaller than your sister's was. The decision is final." Your father said before dismissing you from the room.
Tears stung your eyes as you stormed up the stairs. You couldn't believe this. Your parents were so desperate to get rid of you that they were willing to marry you off to someone twice your age that looked like he was one day away from going in the crypt.
You were so angry. You refused to be sold off like some prized heifer. You'd seen the girls who were placed into marriages like this by their parents. You had to find a way out.
You paced around your room, searching for something, anything to help. Your eyes landed on your globe.
"America, I could go to America." You whispered. There was just one problem. You needed money. Your family had money, but you'd never be able to take the amount you needed to start a new life in America without getting caught. You needed help.
"Marisol!" You called for your lady's maid. "Yes?" She asked you. "Have the stable prepare my horse. I'm going for a ride." You said. She nodded and took off.
An hour later, you had your cloak pulled up around your face as you road your mare through the pastures to your brother's estate. You were disheveled by the time you made it.
"I need your help." You demanded we the two of you were alone in his study. "With what, my dear sister?" He asked you.
"Mother and Father intend to marry me off to Lord Harrington if I do not find another suitor in two weeks. I cannot be his wife, Eddie. I will not." You say.
"So, I'm going to America. Aunt Johanna lives in North Carolina. I can reside with her until I find a more permanent place to live. But I need money to do that. Can you help me?" You beg your brother.
"Y/N, this is a crazy idea." He tells you. "Eddie, I do not care if you think I am making a rash decision. I will not be trapped in a loveless marriage to a man forty years my senior. Will you help me or not?!" You shout at him.
He sighs. "How much do you need?"
"Three thousand pounds. Enough to start over and support myself until I can find work." You say. "I know you must speak to your wife about this, but Eddie, just know, I will find a way there with or without your help."
"Give me a couple of days to get the funds together. And to arrange for me to travel with you. I will not let you make the journey alone. It's far too dangerous." Your brother tells you.
"Thank you, Edmund. Truly." You say as you hug him. "I must leave now, Mother and Father do not know I am here. I will have my things packed and find out how quickly we can leave." You say before bolting out of the room.
"You're not actually going to let her go to America, are you?" Your sister-in-law, Clarissa, spoke as she emerged from behind a bookcase.
"Of course not, I just needed to pacify her for a few days." Eddie spoke as he settled into a chair and rubbed his face. Clarissa settled onto his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck.
"She said that she had two weeks to find another match. Do you think it's possible. Has anyone else tried to court her?" Clarissa asked him.
"Sir, Mister Edmund Beaumont is here to see you." A valet said to Bradley as he sat in his study looking over his ledgers. "Send him in." He half mumbled.
Your brother sighed before jolting up. "My god, Rissa, you're a genius!" I need the carriage at once. I have an idea!" Your brother exclaimed before running out of the room
................
"Bradley!" Eddie practically shouted as he strode in the room. "What, Eddie?" Bradley rolled his eyes, still annoyed at the conversation from a few months ago.
"I need you to do something for me as a favor among friends." Eddie said seriously. Bradley sat up straighter, noticing his friends tone, and his flushed his face was.
"What do you need, Eddie?" Bradley asked him. "I need you to marry my sister." Edmund stated.
The laugh that Bradley let out was boisterous and echoed off the walls of his study. He subsided after a few minutes and noticed that your brother was still standing there.
"Oh. You were serious, " Bradley said. "Yes, I am!" Eddie shouted. "Didn't you tell me a few months ago that I had to stop courting your sister?" Bradley said as he leaned back in his chair.
"Yes, but things have changed. My parents are going to betroth her to Lord Harrington in two weeks if she doesn't have another suitor by then, and Ducky said she refuses to marry him. So, she's planning on running away to America so she doesn't have to marry him. She came and asked me for money so she could! Do you realize how crazy that is and how dangerous it is?! Bradley! She said she would go with or without my help!" Edmund shouts.
"Eddie, if I go to your parents and ask for her hand, they are going to think I'm crazy. I called on her once!" Bradley shouted.
"Yes, but you promonaded with her at Market Square, and you've danced with her at every ball. It will not seem out of the realm of possibility." Eddie counters.
"Fine. But she already has an offer. Why would they accept mine?" Bradley asks him.
There is a long pause between the two men. Your brother can see that Bradley is weighing his options. After what seems like an eternity, he breaks his silence.
"You are a Viscount. You have a higher rank and a larger estate than Lord Harrington, and if you agree to take a smaller dowry, they will surely accept your offer. But, fear not. I will make up for the lack of dowry from my own purse. I will give you three times that of what my father does. Please, Bradley. We both know how head strong Ducky is. She will run away, and if she does, we will never see her again. I cannot lose my sister. I am sorry for the things I said before. I will never doubt your honor again if you do this for me." Edmund begs him.
"Thank you!" Eddie almost weeps as he moves to hug his friend. "You're welcome, Edmund. I know how much she means to you." Bradley says.
"Alright. I will marry her. I will go in the morning to your parents. But I do not wish for a dowry from you. Knowing that Ducky is safe is more than enough." Bradley finally says.
"She means the world to me." Edmund smiles. "I have one request, though. You must promise me that you will be faithful to her. No affairs, no mistresses." Edmund tells him. "I promise." Bradley assures your brother as he shakes his hand, and escorts him out.
Once he's gone, Bradley walks over to a painting on the wall and removes it, revealing a small safe hidden behind it.
Bradley pulled the key from his pocket and turned the lock. He opened the small door and pulled out a small blue box. Inside what his mother's betrothal ring. A stunning arrangement of sapphires and diamonds set in silver. He placed it on his desk, and tomorrow, he would place it on your hand when he asked you to be his Viscountess.
Bradley wished the situation was different. He'd wished that you were accepting his proposal out of love, not out of need. But he would be a good husband to you. He would take care of you.
..........
Convincing your parents to accept his offer was much easier than Bradley thought. He guessed that the idea of them not having to give a dowry out weighed any other reservations they had.
Your smile almost seemed genuine when he asked you for your hand. You played the part of a dutiful fiancée so well as you gushed over your ring, which was a perfect fit. It was almost as if you actually loved him, but Bradley knew that it wasn't true. And no matter how big the smile on his face was, his heart was broken.
Tagging those who might be interested: @shanimallina87 @teacupsandtopgun @desert-fern @roosterforme @daggerspare-standingby @dakotakazansky @startrekfangirl2233 @na-ta-sh-aa @katieshook02 @beyondthesefourwalls @je-suis-prest-rachel @soulmates8 @horseshoegirl @djs8891 @roosters-girl @rosiahills22 @dempy @callsign-magnolia @gretagerwigsmuse @mshistorylover @seitmai @kmc1989 @bcarolinablr @waywardhunter95 @whatislovevavy @inkandarsenic @dingochef @princess76179 @schoollover @cheyrenee @angelbabyyy99 @bobfloydsbabe @sunlightmurdock @sebsxphia @atarmychick007 @queenlmno @sweetwhispersofchaos @mamaskillerqueen @withahappyrefrain @pwficrecs @blackwidownat2814 @carolineesnell @inky-sun @hrlzy @berrypockets
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innxrvision · 7 months ago
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So long - pt. 2 𒂭
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part 2 of 3 ------------ 𖦹 tags: james hetfield x reader, fluff, smut, best friends to lovers, bet, 80s james, a little angst if you squint ♱ a/n: here's part 2 just like i promised! Also... this got too long again and I had to split once more, I'm sorry. Next part will be the last hopefully! I'll probably only be able to post it on wednesday or thursday tho, but we'll see how things go! Thanks to everyone that has been reading and liking my story, it truly made me happy!
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𖦹 part 1 𖦹 part 2 𖦹 part 3
Both of you entered the bar already chatting excitedly, just as you imagined, whatever disagreement that came between you two couldn't last long. You and James' friendship went way back.
"Let's get you a drink." James' playful smile made you smile involuntarily back.
He ordered two beers and raised his glass after you two settled down on a table near the wall, on a spot where the soft yellow light shined right on James' blonde locks.
"To making up!" He said, the smile never leaving his lips.
"If you say so." You shrugged, raising your glass too, but there wasn't any hint of resentment in your voice.
"I really am sorry about what I've said to you earlier. I never wanted to hurt you." He repeated his apology sincerely.
You shrugged again in response, not wanting to make a big deal out of it again.
"What has gotten into you anyway?" You asked genuinely curious before taking a sip.
"I don't really know." He admitted and you could sense some embarrassment coming from him. "I guess my emotions were all over the place and I took all on you. I truly hope you can forgive me."
You just nodded in response, you could easily understand his side.
Soon one beer became two, then three… and before you could realize it, both were a bit too drunk, laughing obnoxiously loud at each other's stupid jokes.
At a certain moment, while James were rambling about his new guitar, your mind wandered as you studied his features under the soft light. The unruly blond hair now gained a different shine, the blue eyes seemed more vivid, and the skin covered by acne suddenly got a different charm to it.
You've known him for years, but, for some reason, the realization that he had grown into a man only hit you now. It's not like you haven't noticed his changes at all, you could admit the boy you knew had gained the charms of a man a long time ago, however, something at that bar made it all become more evident. Maybe it was the alcohol speaking. Regardless, you just stayed silent, lost in your thoughts.
"What are you thinking about?" James' voice cut through your mind, his eyebrow quirked in confusion. "You're looking at me like I have two heads or something." He added, a chuckle coming out of his lips.
You snapped out of it as soon as you heard him, your cheeks heating up in response to his question.
"What?" You laughed nervously "Sorry, just got lost in my thoughts for a moment, go on."
James grinned, finding your flustered expression too amusing to let it go.
"I must really put you in a state to make you blush like that." He took another sip of his beer and kept grinning at you. "What were you thinking about before? I'm curious now."
You tried your best to appear bored and rested your elbow on the table, putting your chin on top of your hand.
"Nothing. Just… Work."
He studied your face and the playful expression he had before turned into a smirk.
"You're hiding something." He teased. "You're a terrible liar."
You rolled your eyes, pretending to be offended by his observation.
"I'm not!" You shot back. "I said it's nothing. You're too curious for your own good."
"Come on, tell me." He nudged your shoulder. "It's not fair if you keep it a secret."
"Not fair? What? Don't you have any secrets?" You scoffed.
"Of course I do. But your secrets are much more interesting to me right now than my own." He leaned closer and raised an eyebrow, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "So spill it. What were you really thinking about? Was it a boy?"
You looked at him incredulous, just wishing he would drop the subject.
"You can't be serious." You looked with concern in your expression at him and he laughed in response.
"Oh, I'm being serious. You were blushing so hard, so it must be a boy." He grinned, crossing his arms. It was clear that he was enjoying messing up with you. "So come on, spill it. Is it someone I know? Do you want me to hook you up?"
"No! What? You're crazy." You couldn't believe he thought you wanted him to hook you up with somebody.
"I know you're thinking about someone, just tell me already. Who's the lucky guy?" He pressed again.
"There's... No one!" You were starting to get frustrated.
"Oh, please. You can't fool me, I know you. You were obviously daydreaming about someone." He raised an eyebrow again and you had to take a deep breath in order to control yourself. "Is it one of the guys? Lars maybe? Or... Is it Kirk? I know you two are very close. You got a thing for him?" His voice dripped with amusement, it was clear he was enjoying teasing you.
"What?!" You opened your mouth in shock as he started pointing names. "I've never...! I never liked Kirk! Where did this come from?!"
"I can see the way you look at him sometimes." He chuckled, it seemed like he was testing you. "If it's not him, then who is it? I won't leave you alone until you tell me."
"Kirk is like a brother to me!" You said offended, your cheeks getting hot once again.
"You're protesting a little too much. I know you're hiding something from me." He studied your blushed face in silence for a second "Well, whoever he is, we can play matchmaker and set you up on a date." He batted his eyelashes dramatically at you and laughed.
"Why are you so invested in being my wingman? Who says I need one?"
You were getting tired of this talk. One second of distraction staring too much at him and now you had to deal with James playing guess by himself. He already loved getting on your nerves, but whenever he got drunk that would get worse.
"You've been single for almost a year now." He grinned. "I just want to help you find someone to share your life with."
You couldn't believe he decided to throw that on your face. Ouch. You sighed and looked around the bar for a second, trying to find a good response.
"Why don't you worry about your own love life?"
He chuckled again, shrugging off your comment.
"You know I don't do long-term relationships." He said casually. "I'm more of a one-night-stand kind of guy." He winked and that irritated you.
You looked down at your hands, trying to navigate your feelings. For some reason, hearing that he had been sleeping with other girls made you feel jealous. You tried your best to not seem affected, but James noticed the shift in your reaction.
"What's wrong with one-night stands?" He asked, his tone playful.
"I just think it's gross." You cursed yourself mentally for your childish response.
"C'mon... You're such a prude." He rolled his eyes and teased you, nudging at your arm. "One-night stands aren't gross, they're just casual fun. You should try it sometime, it might loosen you up a bit." There was that smug grin again that made you heated.
"I don't need to loosen up, I'm fine the way I am." You tried defending yourself. "And also, I'm not a prude."
"Sure, keep telling yourself this." He shrugged, that grin only growing wider at your frustration. "But deep down, you're just a boring goody-two-shoes who wouldn't know how to have a good time if your life depended on it." He continued. "Bet you've never even been on a proper date before."
You scoffed. Yeah, he made a habit of teasing you and yes, that would worsen whenever he drunk, but tonight he seemed even more invested in driving you nuts. "Is it just the alcohol?" You asked yourself.
"Of course I have!" You crossed your arms. "I can have fun just fine. I just think the girls you hook up with are gross."
You tried attacking him, but it was clear that your response only amused him even more.
"Gross, huh? Interesting choice of words." He leaned closer once again. "Does that mean you think I'm gross too? For hooking up with random girls?" He waited for your response, staring at you.
"I've never said that." You regretted mentioning his hookups and sighed.
"I know you're judgmental of my dating life." He leaned back and shrugged. "You're probably just jealous that I'm getting some action and you're not." He smiled triumphantly.
"Who says I'm not getting some action?" You tried your best to sound convincing but your attempt only made him laugh.
"Oh, really? With whom exactly? A pillow? A stuffed animal?" You blushed and he caught your reaction. "I knew it. You don't have anyone. Which is why you're so sour and uptight because you're not getting laid." He taunted.
"You're such an ass." You looked away and rolled your eyes. "It's none of your business, maybe? Just leave my love life alone, please." At this point, you had given up winning this conversation.
"Alright, alright. I'll leave your non-existent love life alone." He raised both of his hands in surrender. "But if you need some advice on how to get laid, come to me. I'm something of an expert, y'know?" He winked playfully.
"Like I would take your advice." You laughed sarcastically, seeing the perfect chance to annoy him back. "Bet you don't how to please girls at all." You added, certain that this would drive him crazy.
In response, he just smiled and shook his head. A different reaction that you were expecting.
"Oh yeah? You think I can't satisfy a girl?" He said confidently and leaned closer to you once again. "In fact, I bet I could satisfy you better than any other guy you've ever been with."
You stopped in your tracks, wondering if you heard him right. "He's just trying to get a reaction of me." You thought to tranquilize yourself.
"No way. Bet you take like... One minute." You decided just to keep teasing, trying to give him hell back for being so annoying.
"You think I'm that bad?" He raised an eyebrow with a smile on his lips. He then went silent for a second and something in his expression changed. "How about we make a bet then? If I can't please you better than anyone you've ever been with before, I'll do the dishes at your house for a week. But... If I do a good job, you have to take me out on a date."
"What?" Your mind went blank with shock and you felt a wave of heat from the embarrassment go through your entire body. Everything was all fun and games until now, but now you were just dumbfounded.
James noticed the shock in your expression and bit his lip, realizing he may have overstepped, but it was too late to take back now.
"Just hear me out. It'll be fun, it's just a harmless bet." He said quickly. "We are friends, right? What's wrong with having some fun?" He tried.
You couldn't even look straight at him now. It's true that you've been getting more and more attracted to him, but since you were best friends, you never expected this kind of proposal to come from him. Was it the alcohol? Was he just trying to prove a point? Your thoughts ran a 100 mph, trying to decide what should you do.
"I..." You started, then shook your head in an attempt to clear your mind. "Fine, it's a bet."
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