#i think dan shouldn't give up tho

[pinsupansu]

i'm lowkey so relieved that no one has asked them about sabrina's carpenter favourite song in the preshow because i don't think i could manage the possibility of phil saying it's juno while mpreg is still not a reality

[dansevilpianotea]

who do you think is more Crowley coded and who is more Azira coded out of dnp?

i set myself hourly notifications ever since you send the ask and it still took me this long to answer, im so sorry 😭

to answer your question:

It might seem like obvious that dan is crowley coded and phil is azira coded because of their aesthetics and personality but stating that as that is too simple for me. lets break it down:

dan is like crowley in the obvious sense of having that edgy aesthetic and always needing to question things while phil is the one with the light aesthetic who enjoys what is happening despite the problems it has. just watch them play the game of life.

this reminds me of this quote from a book ive read for uni which really stuck with me:

so yea, dan is the social scientist who points out what most people miss and phil is the one who tells us that we shouldn't wallow in defeat of it but make our own meaning out of it. and we need both! they are like ying and yang, like crowley and aziraphale in that way.

crowley who questions heaven and thusly falls, but then doesnt stop questioning hell because he doesnt see the world in black and white, good actions and bad actions.

i think dan for a long time was not like that. i say this with the utmost respect but if you look back, his branding was usually self deprecating jokes and at least to me personally it felt like his perspective was pessimistic. he always made sure to leave a positive message but to me it felt like a wish for a better future, not a feeling of certainty that it will be better.

Phil on the other hand is very much like that:

Phil is like aziraphale and me in the sense that he gets irrationally worried about things,

but it is dan who literally did a tour about his worries of the world ending, with branding and all:

and yet:

phil and crowley both have that rational optimism, the sense that things will be okay. but aziraphale does not give up in-spite of the odds being against them. in s1 he refuses to run away to alpha centauri because he believes that they should stay and fight. that there is still hope. he does not accept that the world will end. but its crowley who sparks the idea of aziraphale raising the antichrist with him. its aziraphale who tells angel crowley of armageddon , and its why crowley gets upset and questions the almighty.

so my point is that phil has aziraphale's light aesthetic vibes and his fear of near doom but crowley's certainty that everything will be okay in the end despite it.

dan on the other hand has crowley's edgy dark aesthetic, his cynicism and sense of questioning belief systems, but also aziraphale's determinism to fight what he is sure is a losing battle/the end of the world because he wants to believe that it is possible that everything will be okay (that being the message of wad/ywgttn/big/etc...)

i want to talk a bit about 'dark/light polarity'. what we mean by that is two sides of the same coin. yin and yang:

☯️

they depend on each other, they interconnect and intertwine. be it real people or fictional characters, it is never a clear black and white binary, because what the characters have something that the other lacks and when they come together they become a whole. plato said humans once had 4 legs and feet, and then got split in half by zeus to punish us to live our lives yearning to be connected with the other half of our soul/coin, our soulmate. they carry sth of each other within them because there are shards that got broken in the middle when the being was split and were forced to choose sides.

so even tho it might seem like dan is more like crowley coded and phil is more aziraphale coded because of their light/dark aesthetic, there's many things of both in each of them and thats what makes it interesting and real to us.

[doubleddenden]

Okay so I've been playing Star Rail and I'm gonna do a lil amateur review because I do that sometimes

Here's my take

1. I like it. I got it for pc and it's fun when I can play it.

More under the cut

2. It is free to play with micro transactions, however I've not spent any money on it and I find it quite playable and easy to get into. That being said, I started with a lot of free stuff from starting so early and codes, so my experience may have differed if I started later.

3. It's a turned based RPG akin to JRPGs like Digimon Cyber Sleuth, Persona 5, etc, but a little easier to comprehend combat wise

4. Story and setting so far is something sort of like a mix of Star Ocean- specifically 4 with the planet hopping- or Rogue Galaxy, with... well, a LOT of mystic, techno, scifi, and religious babble. Enjoyable tho. I love space trains so much. It's dumb but classy. There's also a LOT of optional lore you can collect and read to really help you get immersed if that's your thing, and characters will have a lot of dialogue to give you more world building lore too. That being said, they do kinda just toss you into the ocean with really complex shit right out the gate with no vuild up- I've been told that having SOME knowledge of the Honkai Impact series can build upon what's given, but it's not entirely necessary.

5. Graphics are great, I like the art style and how polished everything looks. Art style works for the game and it looks gorgeous. I do think the NPCs kinda look plain, but that's about expected.

6. Music is passable. Not really finding any ear worms just yet, though. The summoning music and the train music are great though.

7. It might be me and my somewhat shit connection, but I experience lag and disconnection sometimes. This can get pretty frustrating

8. Characters are fun and have fun dynamics with each other. I already dig The Trailblazer, Dan Hung, and March 7th's dynamic- I will say, wtf is this name? Like I know why, but still, not just March, March 7th specifically is her name. Is her full name Saturday, March 7th, 5023 AD?

9. Voice acting is... decent enough. I play English dub because I have reading difficulties due to unmedicated ADHD, before anyone starts screaming at me to change languages. There's some strange takes or line reads sometimes, sometimes the voice will read something different from the text, and there's a couple of voices I wish would just sound... different. But the majority is passable to really good. I've also heard some unexpected voices- you could say they are TRASH, but I find them TASTEful.

10. Character design is pretty fun imo- definitely a bit of Genshin style, but it is by the same people so you kind of expect that. But they're fun to look at, have fun weapons and moves, and have great art. My one complaint would be similar builds and designs for some characters, but that's minor and also expected. But I will say, I do prefer a good anime style over indie cartoon or realistic style, so to me I think it's great.

11. The menus are... very complex. Easy to lose track and get lost in. I swear the pause menu rearranges every time I open it.

12. It shouldn't need saying, but: It's not Genshin Impact- that's fine actually. In fact it's great, turn based rpgs are really fun, especially JRPG styled, which i like to play (Dragon Quest 11, Digimon Cyber Sleuth, Persona 5, Pokémon, etc). While I do like exploring open worlds and having a lot of freedom and real time fighting, sometimes it's nice to have a simpler point A to point B system with smaller maps, and especially nice to have auto battle. There's a bit of carry over from Genshin, but i think it works for what's given. I do miss my emergency fo- I mean, my adorable best friend Paimon, but she and all my other Genshins are Impacting in the other game while I Rail some Sta- wait I'm not finishing that sentence.

13. It is gacha. You kind of expect it- some people won't like it, I kinda like it to some degree, but I do got issues. Basically watch your spending- again, I haven't felt the need to, unlike some games that feel like you have to to get anything done. But it definitely would help to speed things along if i were. When you get a good character, it's a nice feeling for me, personally. That being said they do give you 3 pretty good ones right out the gate, and you do gather in game materials to help you summon at a fair pace anyway, so you're rolling decently enough to get something out of it.

Overall an 8/10 so far. I wanna keep playing, but unfortunately this damn meat mech that is my wretched bodily prison of my soul requires sleep, and I have things I have to do.

[jealousfishrave]

Books I Read in 2024 (and some brief thoughts)

Lapvona by Ottessa Moshfegh- took me like five months to finish it, i just don't think it was for me

Ghostbuster's Daughter: Life with My Dad, Harold Ramis by Violet Ramis Stiel- harold ramis is a huge comfort guy for me and feeds the huge daddy-issues hole in my heart, so this book was the best thing ever for me

You Shouldn't Have Come Here by Jeneva Rose- i was looking for trashy romance, and that is what i got. ending was a little dumb, but fed me what i was craving

Nothing to See Here by Kevin Wilson- listened to the audio book, i don't think i absorbed much of it.

Oscar Wars: A History of Hollywood in Gold, Sweat, and Tears by Michael Schulman- super interesting topic, and very well-written! I will say tho that it felt like it glossed over/compartmentalized the role of poc actors/awardees into one chapter

Taste Makers: Seven Immigrant Women Who Revolutionized Food in America by Mayukh Sen- a lovely and quick book, i want to learn more!

This is Your Mind on Plants by Michael Pollan- reads more like a person running up to you and telling you about their first interactions with drugs, a bit unprofessional imo

For God, Country, & Coca-Cola: The Definitive History of the Great American Soft Drink and Company That Makes It by Mark Pendergrast- very well written, super dense, cool when i started to recognize the ads they were talking about

The Brilliant Abyss by Helen Scales- I LOVE THE DEEP SEA AND ALL OF GOD'S FUNNY CREATURES IN IT

How to be a Dictator: The Cult of Personality in the Twentieth Century by Frank Dikötter- read this to prepare for a class that I ended up dropping, but found it a decent introduction to each of the people covered in it. Definitely not a comprehensive history however

The Tale of Genji: Dreams at Dawn (Volumes 1-7) by Waki Yamato- I took a class on japanese lit during my semester abroad this year, and this is so SO good. I like how the old topics (grooming, overall creeping over young women) is actually not explained away as "result of the times" and acknowledged for the psychological damage it gives. Going to defo continue finishing this series in 2025!

The Great Wave: Gilded Age Misfits, Japanese Eccentrics, and the Opening of Old Japan by Christopher E. G. Benfey- this has become an area of history that i've focused a lot on, and was looking forward to reading this book since it's centered in the exact spot i love to learn about. However, after the first section, this book gets so boring and confusing jfc. just not well-written imo

Outlander by Diana Gabaldon- super fun, thrilling, sexy (but also be warned for some super fucked up couple dynamics)

Underground: The Tokyo Gas Attack and the Japanese Psyche by Haruki Murakami- yup murakami wrote this non-fic , and it's super upsetting

Angels & Demons by Dan Brown- read this so i could watch the movie so i could see hot ewan macgregor as a hot priest so i could see him yank off his priest collar, got exactly what i wanted and then some. this story was insane i actually loved it so so much

Ask Not: The Kennedys and the Women They Destroyed by Maureen Callahan- crazy upsetting and super illuminating. would defo recommend

Dragonfly in Amber by Diana Gabaldon- not as sexy as Outlander, but a super solid story. very history heavy

The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown- not as exciting as Angels and Demons, felt a bit more like I was being talked down to, but still a fun read

Conclave by Robert Harris- read this bc the trailer for the movie looked super epic, and this book had me in its clutches until the very end. ending was interesting, and i'm choosing to believe (hope) that it's well-meaning and just tainted bc the topic was a bit clumsily handled

Going Clear: Scientology, Hollywood, and the Prison of Belief by Lawrence Wright- very interesting and dense af. learned a lot more about tom cruise than i thought there would be and a lot less about john travolta than i thought i would

A Woman of Pleasure by Kiyoko Murata- guys like honestly,,,, dare i say fav book of year! (heads up for intense scenes tho)

Deep: Freediving, Renegade Science, and What the Ocean Tells Us about Ourselves by James Nestor- I LOVE DEEP SEA CREATURES PART 2!!! super cool book and very very interesting. a bit of a jack-off near the ending.

Best. Movie. Year. Ever.: How 1999 Blew Up the Big Screen by Brian Raftery- had me watching a ton of 1999 movies, a super great book

Voyager by Diana Gabaldon- just as hot as the first book in the series (woo!), and the love story is super cute. A bit uncomfortable whenever diana wrote about Mr Willoughby bc he's a huge chinese stereotype. also thought she handled the topic of the slave trade a bit ham-fistedly, but i see her intentions of keeping it in the historical context instead of ignoring it

[monstermaster13]

A Different Kind Of Man-Beast. Mel to Roman Craig (The Great Outdoors) FTM TG/Were-theme. Featuring that Werebelushi In The Shades, speaking of that character this story gives us a little bit of a history behind him...specifically a history of being a former trouble-maker. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Mel the koala-girl and her best friend Eucalyptus were an adorkable anthro koala duo that fangirled over a lot of different actors and characters,  and in Eukie's case it was Dan Aykroyd. If you were to ask Eukie which actor she'd consider dating or falling in love with -  you'd hear 'Oh definitely Dan Aykroyd.'  In her half of the apartment, you'd find a ton of Dan Aykroyd movies and merch including homemade ones.  One night the two of them were in the media room part of the apartment, sorting out the movie collection.  'This is definitely better than the selection at the Monster Mart video store.'  'How so?'  'At least this one has a comedy section where the comedians are listed by names.' 'I couldn't even find the Dan Aykroyd section when I went last week.'  'I don't think there is an Aykroyd section.'  'No Dan Aykroyd section?  That's a crime that is.' 'How so?' 'When I was looking in the comedy sections for movies that have Aykroyd in them.  All I found was a section that had I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry and Pixels. Sandler movies! I shouldn't have to dredge through the Happy Madisons, the bad parody movies and American Pie knock-offs in order to get to my beloved Aykroyd movies.'  

Matthias aka That Werebelushi In The Shades nodded in agreement. 'As much as I love buying movies and shows from that store...ugh, I agree. Going through the horror section was a chore for me. I always attempt to find some good 80's or 80's-esque horror movies to talk about on my show, but sometimes I just get bogged down with all the Sy-Fy channel movies and the Asylum films.  Yes occasionally I get Full Moon movies like Gingerdead Man, but most of the time...Asylum, Asylum, Asylum.  Seriously they put up a whole damn Sharknado section.' The John Belushi-esque monster with shaggy black fur had been perusing the Monster Mart video store for several weeks and even he had to admit that the selection was poor.  'So you agree?' 'Oh absolutely Eukie.' 'Thank you for helping out with movie night by the way.'  'No problem.'

The two of them had called him over for help on their movie night,  Eucalyptus planned for an Aykroyd marathon with Mel and Matthias but she had to be extra cautious, mainly because of how the moon along with whatever show or movie Mel was watching at the time affected her.  'However we are going to be extra careful. You know, it's a full moon and when you have a movie night on a full moon and Mel and I are involved.' 'Say no more...I remember the last time that happened, we had a Jaws marathon and Mel turned into a monstrous shark-girl and tried to stalk my roommates when they were in the pool.' 'Oh yeah...and when she got turned into a Freddy Krueger-like version of herself after watching the Nightmare On Elm Street movies.' 'We have to be careful. Just in case..' 'This isn't going to turn out like that time she watched all the Howling movies and turned into her werekoala form is it?' 'Of course not. Besides, it's an Aykroyd movie marathon...what could happen?' 'She could become part conehead.'  'That would be adorable seeing her as a conehead.' 'Or worse...she could turn into that Aykroyd ghost from the Twilight Zone movie.' 'You mean the ghostly hitchhiker?'  'Yes.'  'Or she could...get were-celeb powers from it again and become a Were-Aykroyd.'  'She already does have those doesn't she? Of course she does.  Although it wouldn't be so bad would it? I mean if she turned into Aykroyd or an Aykroyd character it would be the most precious thing ever.'  'To you maybe Eukie,  but if she turned into say J.P Valkenheiser from Nothing But Trouble or Vic from Neighbors, oh boy would I have trouble trying to remain sane with either of those two.'

Eukie giggled as she called the two of them over to the sofa and she started the Aykroyd movie marathon up with the Blues Brothers, followed by Neighbors,  Spies Like Us, Doctor Detroit and Trading Places.  Mel seemed fine during the first half of the marathon but once it got to the double bill of My Stepmother Is An Alien and the Great Outdoors she started clutching her stomach as if she had eaten something awful. 'Eukie...I don't feel so good.'  'Really? But you were fine earlier...' Eukie took a glance out of the window and saw the full moon about to peer from behind the clouds. 'Please excuse me for a second...'  'Alright,  you're excused.'  Mel hurried over to her half of the apartment and braced herself, fearing what was going to happen to her...was she going to transform into a monster, or into a version of herself based on a character from the movie?

As the moon peered out from behind the clouds and the light shined through the windows and onto her,   she felt a rather uncomfortable sensation jolting through her body,  she groaned in anguish as she saw her chest and torso slowly broadening and expanding,  her grey and white fur slowly transitioning away except for a few parts that darkened and grew across her chest and downward to almost navel length. 'Oh that's just great, i'm getting more hair than usual and i'm already furry. I hope i'm not turning into the bear from that movie.'  She groaned a few more times as her breasts slowly retracted into her chest and then screamed. 'No nooo...noooo!'. Her dark blue tank top was getting a little bit tight as her stomach slowly pumped itself up, inflating and growing.  'Ugh..i'm getting hairy AND also gaining weight? I ask... could this get any worse?'.  

She had always prided herself on her athletic physique which she had gotten from naturally being a gifted athlete and crime-fighter as musculature developed on her chest, torso and stomach. She gasped as her arms contorted, altering as her hands enlarged...her tank top's buttons popping off rapidly one by one and flying all over the place. 'If this tank top gets ruined, someone is going to get their ass kicked tonight.'  Looking at her tank top, she expected it to rip at any minute but instead it slowly turned into a checkered overshirt while a white undershirt materialized underneath, she scratched her back for a bit, feeling a bit of hair sprouting a little bit on her lower back.  'Well thank goodness for that'. She was relieved but still a little bit shocked and horrified as she tried to see if her koala-like tail had changed, she felt around and touched her rear...watching as her tail retracted.

Her jeans slowly turned from blue to brown as her feet enlarged, her legs stretching in the process.  Her privates altering into the more masculine variant while her hip shape altered, losing the aspects of a female pair of hips and restructuring into a more robust mannish pair,  she gasped as two of the middle toes on both feet shifted and merged to give them a slightly webbed appearance. 'Well at least i'm not turning into a bear...if i'm not turning into the bear, then who am I turning into?  Hang on...the outfit, the odd-looking webbed toes...i'm going Aykroydian aren't I?'.  She gasped as she examined her body,  her back broadening as her shoes darkened and turned red.

The koala-girl's back slowly broadened as her shoulders followed suit as she slowly elevated in height to 6'1, a jacket similar to the one the character Roman Craig wore materialized over her shirts as her neckline altered.  While her hair shortened and fluffed up, darkening to a darker shade of brown and a pair of short clean-shaved sideburns sprouted on her cheeks,  her eyebrows arching and thickening as her eyes widened, one eye turning from brown to green while the other remained brown.  giving her eyes of two different colors.  Her koala-like ears shrank into her wavy hair and shifted into a more human looking pair as her cheekbones sharpened and her nose enlarged and altered in size.  Her heart skipped a couple of beats as she gazed at herself in the mirror.

Her lips altered in appearance while her teeth brightened, her facial features slowly morphing and reshaping into those of the character...that character being Roman Craig, as her jawline altered and her appearance became less recognizable to her.  'I look like a Dan Akyroyd character!'. She screamed as her voice deepened and altered, becoming masculine and very manner of factly in terms of mannerisms as it altered to match her appearance,  becoming Roman's voice. 'Now I sound like an Aykroyd character too?'.  The koala-girl held her head as her personality and memories altered, she was starting to remember she was male but more than that...that she was named Roman Craig, and that he has the brother of Chet Ripley,  she attempted to keep his personality at bay but his influence over her was intoxicating, she couldn't help want to give in.  Eventually as in a few seconds later,  Mel gave in and Roman officially took over...the transformation had completed itself.  Roman strode over for a few seconds before admiring himself. 'Not bad, I clean up well.'

Matthias/Werebelushi looked over for a few seconds as Eukie went to go in and inspect what had happened. 'I have got good news and i've got bad news. What do you want to hear first?'  'The good news.'  'Alright, the good news...Mel has not turned into J.P Valkenheiser.' 'Thank goodness! I wouldn't want to end up on that Bonestripper rollercoaster!', 'And the bad news?' 'She's a much worse Aykroyd character.' 'Which one? It's not Vic is it?'. 'Roman...' He gulped, as he braced himself for Roman's arrival...a few seconds later the new Roman Craig showed up,  chuckling to himself as he looked over at him.  'Hello there Werebelushi, wanna wreak some havoc together?'  'I told you Roman, I don't do that..i'm not that kind of monster.  And besides, we all know that I have sworn off that for good.'  'Don't tell me you've gone soft on me now.'

"No I haven't gone soft,  I am just saying that I don't think it's safe for us to do it. Besides, we all know you have a different version of fun than I do.  And I'm just saying you're a bit too chaotic for even me. It's difficult to keep myself sane with you, the only character crazier than you is Vic."

"Crazy? Me? Why, rejecting my suggestion to have an absolutely fun-time causing havoc is the craziest thing i've ever heard if you ask me.  But hey, who am I to judge?  Despite how different your views are from mine,  I respect ya. Plus I wouldn't want to mess with you especially not after I heard about your wrestling skills."

"Not just wrestling but also martial arts.  You forgot i'm a kung fu master."

"I bet if you paired up with me we'd make a good tag-team in a battle."

"We'd make a great team, yes...but i'd have to keep you under control."

Roman cackled in his signature way, laughing at Matthias's remarks and responding with a few quips. Both of them were troublemakers,  but Matthias was a reformed troublemaker who had worked with Roman in the past and after one incident he decided to change his ways and to reform,  that and his anger issues at the time combined with his powers were two benefactors in that case,  specifically in the instances where his inhuman strength accidentally resulted in injuries,  most of the injuries were not fatal but some did have quite a few broken bones as a result.  The two buds rekindled their relationship with a hug as Eucalyptus walked over to them.

Thus with that Matthias, Eucalyptus and Roman continued the Aykroyd marathon and had a good time doing it and later that night they celebrated their friendship.  It is unknown if Mel managed to morph back to being herself afterwards, but she did learn a lesson and that lesson is...sometimes even if you know it's going to be bad, you have to give things a chance to see how they play out.  And to the new Roman Craig,  this was only just the very beginning.  Reuniting certainly did bring Roman and Matthias together in lots of ways.

[yokelish]

better the SPACE TRAGEDY route than whatever they're doing with mainline genshin story in my humblest of humble opinions. remember when the akademiya sages did all that shit and got lifetime forest watching community service as punishment? we need NEVEEEER LET YOU GOOOO IT'S WHY I DID THEM AAAALLLL energy

I don't think he's going to be able to stay on xianzhou even if he wants to because they don't want anything related to the previous IL back. that title is forever marred by whatever he did that they're even keeping bailu in confinement over it lmao not to mention how they kept him imprisoned for no reason after he was reborn.

if he sticks with the express he needs to have his horned form in future cutscenes or I will never forgive The Hoyo. but really he shouldn't leave because I don't want to be alone with march 7th

what did you think about sampo tho

I wonder how Forest Watchers feel about the Sages bullshit. Isn't it... insulting? Honestly there are so many teeny-tiny things about Sumeru storyline that pissed me off. Like, ah, this is what we are doing? Weird as fuck but okay? I guess? Hypasia

I am holding on to the thought that Dan Heng will not stay in Xianzhou. As in he will return to the Express. He could still pull of the Tragic Second Male Lead and go "No I must leave to protect you fromy water dragon power UwU you know I am a great sinner and my past is too dark and dangerous to be near you".

Honestly? Yes absolutely. Horny Dan Heng. But also. No. He won't have it in cutscenes. Because Hoyo. They wouldn't you to look at horny Dan Heng unless you win your 75/25 or pay up.

I will kill myself if Hoyo forces me to stay with 03/07 alone. Absolutely no. She gives me the same eek as children gacha characters in Genshin. In the words of wise man Dainsleif, "I am a self-confessed pessimist and refuse to believe that all children have hearts of gold".

Sampo is there. I don't feel any way about him. He is just there. I don't care.

[torawro]

DAN HIROKI WITH SEX TOYS.

LINA !!!!!! *shakes you violently and then kisses you excessively* baby....sweetums....i am so so SOOO INFINITELY SAWRY that i have not gotten to this ask any sooner than now, it's been over two weeks and i just feel plain awful about it :(( the last few weeks have been busier in school finals are approaching but im here now !! i hate giving half-assed replies so yeah :') can't wait to see u add this to ur dan hiroki master list <3 let's get into this tho :) DAN HIROKI SUPREMACY !!! @touyyes we back on our shit again heheheheee

okay so! dan hiroki with sex toys is one of those things you wouldn't expect to see in your relationship. i mean, he is just so so good at pleasing you already, the rotation between his mouth, fingers and cock made you feel like you were ascending. so of course you would have never expected him to invest in a little 'assistance'.

dan was very secure in himself, and even more so now that he shared his apartment, as well as his heart and soul with you, so his pride was never wounded, or his ego prodded at when the thoughts of getting a few toys for you to play with crossed his mind every now and again. dan loved you, so much, but he loved the way your eyes rolled to the back of your skull and the way you'd drool as you called out his name like a prayer even more. a pretty little angel like you should be able to get a taste of heaven too right? not just common mortals like him. that's what hiroki believed, and that's certainly how he felt when you squeezed and clamped around his cock when you came, or taste the sweet nectar that dripped from your budding flower whenever he sucked on your clit like a pacifier.

and after serving a despicable man a cold plate of chilling justice, his clothes tattered in blood stains, he had done some research online and this only confirmed and unearthed one his deepest desires regarding you: he wanted to see his pretty angel completely come undone without him even touching you.

and the perfect opportunity arose when he-- as trivial as it may sound-- caught you talking negatively about yourself. dan is one of those men that get truly offended when their partner says something about themselves, like their physical features, their personality, the way they think or feel, literally anything. he hardly expresses that much emotion but little did you know, you had spelled your own doom for your poor little cunt.

this leads to the present, where he softly commanded you to spread your legs as wide as you could and keep them open, lest you wanted to be punished further (his words shouldn't have made your pussy pulsate but it did). you're not even sure how much time has passed but you knew it had to be at least 20 minutes that you've held the blue vibrator against your pussy, not daring to move your arm even an inch, because your beloved hiroki was watching you-- intensely at that, his cock straining against his pants, practically trying to push its way free. but his face remained steely with a mask like calmness, a subtle smile permanently etched on his perfect lips. the way his gaze never left yours sent a chill down your spine.

he had gotten one of those bluetooth vibrators that you could control remotely and man, did he have a ball with that, at the expense of dangling the sweet feeling of orgasming in front of your nose, just to yank it away again at the last minute. he'd also had you repeat the same sentence over and over: i'm the prettiest girl in the world, because yes, all of this stemmed from you talking negatively about yourself, and it genuinely confused him because he never saw you in a negative light; not now and probably not ever. and whenever your words faltered or became a little too jumbled (or he just wanted to tease you, he's a kinky bastard man for that) he'd turn up the intensity to its max, making you arch your back and scream out the words loud and clear, just how he liked, or turn it down to its lowest when you were so focused on cumming you didn't bother putting forth any effort. it went on like this for what felt like ages, and he only stopped because the aching in his pants was becoming a little irritating and made his eye twitch.

you were just on the verge of cumming again, before he completely turned off the toy, gingerly taking it from your hands and tossed it somewhere on the bed. slipping off his pants and boxers in one swift motion, he wordlessly climbed on top of you and pushed your trembling legs all the way back to your chest, so your twitchy, puffy, glistening clit was on full display (as if it wasn't before). putting all of his weight on top of you to kiss your tears away, you hissed and felt your body shake when his shaft rubbed against your cunt. you were so sensitive, hiroki could have came right there just from seeing you underneath him like this. "my sweet girl, you performed wonderfully for me, did so good."

his praise dragged a pathetic whine, needy mewl from the back of your throat. "i'm your good girl hiro!! p-promise i am!!! i am!!" the dark haired man stared at you in awe. his 'persuasion' had worked. after he was done with you, he was definitely going to order a bulk of more playthings to try out on you.

"i know you are angel, i know you are. and now i'll give you your reward now."

[zu-is-here]

I'm doing the babysitting job since the beginning of the school year and yeah I thought about quitting a few times. While the extra money is nice I do not need it to live properly. My mom said I should quit a few times as well after seeing how tired as was woops. I dunno if I'm just being stubborn but I kinda wanna try to finish the year tho ¯\_(⊙_ʖ⊙)_/¯

Yes I hope we'll get some new medicine soon to ease the pain as well. She likes running around too much :3

Yeeeee you shall be defeated by the R! ÒwÓ it's my revenge for how hard some russian seem to me ;D

Hmmm

D'ailleurs -> basically "besides". "Ailleurs" means "elsewhere" so "d'ailleurs" could be litteraly "from elsewhere" ? It can be used at the start, middle or end of the sentence.

"D'ailleurs, tu devrais pas appeler ton médecin à propos de ça ???" -> Btw, shouldn't you call your doctor about that???

"Tu m'avais pas dit, d'ailleurs, que ton chat avait eu des chatons!" -> You didn't tell me, btw, that your cat had kittens!

"Si je me souviens bien, cette boulangerie donne même des bonbons d'ailleurs, d'ailleurs !" -> If I remember right, this bakery gives free candy, btw!

Au fait -> comes from the sentence "aller au fait" (get to the point), usually means btw when it's at the start of a sentence. Makes a change of topic, like you just remembered a thing and wanna share it ( "fait" = fact)

"Au fait! Tu as essayé tes nouvelles chaussures ?" -> Btw! Did you try your new shoes?

It could be used at the end of the sentence too I guess, it's just more often use at the beginning.

À propos -> I'd kinda translate it by "about that" but it is very much a synonym of "au fait" when it's used as btw. A change of topic by a sudden thought, introducing the new sentence. But it's more in a -you said or did a thing that make me think about that- while "au fait" can be just -I'm bored let's just change the topic for fun- (I'd picture someone looking dead just suddenly perking up and made a clap with their hands before starting to talk). I'd say "au fait" is more in a friendly tone than "à propos"

"À propos, connaîtriez-vous un bon coiffeur dans le coin ?" -> By the way, do you know of any good hairdresser nearby?

And another fun fact: "à-propos" does not have the same meaning as "à propos"

When I use btw, I thought usually more about "d'ailleurs" :3

-bulle (*teacher mode on* xd)

The main thing is that one doesn't interfere with the other (úwù) Good luck with the study and with the job! <3

Awww hope so! How's Moorea doing now? (ówò)

Well-deserved! XD

Oh my god, Blue!! (☆ω☆) Thank you sooo much for this mini-lesson! ♡ Now I understand the difference *w* Gotta use in French to look smarter XD

"Tu devrais pas" -> so you don't use "ne" at all? Is "pas" enough? *0*

"Le chat et les chatons (this sounds adorable omg ///) -> do all animal baby names have "-ons" in the end as the rule? (ﾟ∀ﾟ)

What does "à-propos" mean then?.. (；ﾞﾟ'ωﾟ')

And how are you doing lately? ☆

[judgement-free-sideblog]

Ghost from the rainforest

James Conrad x Reader

Summary: A simple rescue mission will bring him back to a place full of nightmares, and maybe this time he could find redemption. Situated in 1975, 2 years after the events of Skull Island.

Warnings: Violence, blood, wounds, mentions of war, cursing, implied smut, smoking, angst.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 3: Those who never came home

At 4:35am you were already in the departures site, checking the truck was fully loaded and that there were enough food and water for the men that will accompany you.

It had been a long night, and you barely had any sleep since every time you closed your eyes you could picture Conrad's face laughing at you.

You shake those feelings away and lean your back in the truck, and close your eyes for a moment, the cold breeze of the early morning was more comfortable than the hot room you were staying. And suddenly you were on the edge of sleeping holding yourself standing against the dirty tarp covering the backside of the truck.

"Morning" His voice said suddenly and you frown with your eyes still closed "We are ready when you are Doctor" His tone was oddly professional and when you finally looked at him he immediately look aside, it hurt that he was in the same place as you, regretting what happened.

"Fine, who's driving?" You had the keys on your hand and look at the men with him, there were only three, apart from Conrad. "Aren't you missing people? I count five last night, Dr. Y/L/N" you said shaking his hands.

"Reles" Said the shorter of the four, he had a nice candid smile and brown skin. "Nice to meet you Doc, I must say you look nothing like your dad" That make you smile.

"Glenn Mills" Said the black men next to him looking embarrassed at his teammate behavior "Ignore him doctor, he doesn't know how to be around women." You only nodded in response.

"Ah Reg, I remember" You say at the youngest of them, before he spoke.

"Slivko is fine, those idiots run away, they say the won't be at the jungle for a month" He spoke as someone way older than he looked like, and you could figure they were another form of victims of the war, even when they were alive.

"I'm driving" James said, extending his hand to grab the keys.

"No you're not, they drive on the correct side of the road here" You said ignoring him, "You guys can handle the stick?" You ask the men holding the keys in front of them. Mills raised his hand and you throw them at him. "Let's go then".

Slivko and Reles got inside the backside to guard the boxes and you hop on the front seat next to Mills, and after a minute Conrad sit next to you, and closed the door careful to not look at you.

"I think there is plenty space in the back guarding the medicine." You said to him coldly.

"And I think I get paid to guard you not your boxes" he answered and Glenn was desperately trying to start the engine and ignore you two.

"Fine, but at least keep that thing away from me" you said rolling your eyes and then pointing to the large gun he was carrying with him. And you could hear a giggle on the back knowing pretty well that by now the whole crew knew about what had happened.

The way out of the town was boring and easy, after four hours there was only a country road surrounded by small houses and when it was time to eat you chose to stop at small village. You got something to eat and gave some medicine to the children that couldn't go to the main city to get a proper doctor, and you were back on the road.

"So what kind of doctor are you then?" Reg asked from the back of the truck opening the window that separated you.

"I have a PhD in Chemistry and Biology" You said to him taking the canteen he offered you "And work as a nurse in the 60's so I know my way around wounds and diseases" you said to him.

"See Captain?" Reles said to Conrad in a very serious tone "She is too smart for you" He add making Slivko and Mills laugh while Conrad only gave him a murderous look. "But for real tho, isn't it boring to spend all your time here? I mean don't you mis America?"

"Of course I do, but this is important, I mean the troops are leaving yes, but someone has to help clean the mess they made, no offense" you said and James nodded understanding. "Who's that by the way?" You asked pointing at a picture Glenn had attached to the windshield, where the four men were standing in some field with water to the knees, and next to Conrad an old man with a beard carrying what it seems to be a katana.

"That's Marlow, an old friend" Conrad said and you could tell it was true because there was a happiness in his eyes when he talked about him.

"Yeah, is like a crazy Santa" Reg said, "But anyone would have gone crazy after..."

"Is getting late, we should stop don't you think?" Mills interrupted suddenly and you could see how the three of them looked at Slivko with anger, he had been about to tell you something he shouldn't.

"Yeah sure" You said looking at the map, and then the road "We will be at our first delivery point in ten minutes, and we can sleep there". You haven't told them where you were delivering part of the medicine, you have done it several times and Noah's men never had a problem with it, but you doubt the Captain will be ok with it. "This people can be a little unfriendly" you start when the lights of the village were clear on the road. "Just do as I tell you and it should be fine"

"You don't sound convinced" James noted.

"Because I'm not" You said and you make your hands into fists on your lap praying at nobody in particular that things will go well.

A couple of kids with large guns were at the entrance of the village, you bend over Conrad's lap to reach the window and make sure the see it was you, they immediately let you go in and you get back to your sit pretending it didn't feel like heaven to touch his hard chest.

A man came out of one of the huts with a smile on his face, framed by a thick goatee, he wasn't bad looking but the AK-47 in his hands, and the ones he had put on other children hands was enough reason to hate him.

"I thought you said you hated militars" Conrad said offering you his hand to get down of the truck.

"They're are militia, nor proper militars" You said ignoring his help and jumping of the truck.

"Is there a difference?" He asked looking at the man waiting for you with a smile.

"Yeah, they're worst" You said and walk towards Shukri.

"Selamat kembali, saya isteri cantik saya" Welcome back, my beautiful wife The man said to you and tried to give you a hug that you didn't respond to.

"Santai Shukri, dan hentikan memanggil saya isteri awak, inilah yang anda minta." Relax Shukri, and stop calling me your wife, here is what you asked for. You pointed at the truck and Reg and Joe were already carrying down boxes helped by Shukri's men.

"This are not your usual companions" The man said then looking directly at Conrad who had been pending on your whole interaction since the beginning.

"No, they're not. Is safer don't you think? If we get use to the same people there could be snitches" You lied to him and he nodded approvingly"

"Ahh isteri, I told you you have to stay with me, I could use that quick mind of yours" He said and tried to pull you closer to him but then Conrand put his body between you two making both you and Shukri look in surprise, plus anger on his side.

"How many boxes are we downloading?" He asked and you could see some anger in his eyes.

"14, the ones that are marked with a black cross" You said still shock by his reaction.

"British? That's different" The guerrilla lider said behind his back and you could see Conrad shoulders tense and his nostrils move with fury.

"Yeah, and very helpful, right prince charming?" You said, and touch his arm softly trying to calm whatever the hell was going on in his head. "Put those nice arms of you to good use and help the boy will you?" It was not an order but a plea and he listened because he relaxed his back and start walking towards the truck. You indulge Shukri with a smile and remained close to him while the man take part of the medicine, after that they show you a hut where you could spend the night with two cots inside blankets and a couple chairs "Just that?" You asked him and could see a disgusting grin on his face. "We are five, three of us are going to have to sleep on the floor, I won't risk my men to get bit by a snake, a spider or god knows what"

"Thats all I have isteri, unless you want to share mine" He showed you a toothy grin.

"Hentikan memanggil isteri!" Stop calling me wife you shouted exasperated. "I will take my chances with the spiders, thank you" You said and walk inside where the tired men were resting. "Glenn take one of the cots, Reg and Reles you can take turns for the other" you took a chair and sit there, any hope you had about a civil conversation with Shukri was now gone and with that also your hopes to take a shower. That certainly was not something you will miss when you came back with them to america, if you go back, your mind corrected you.

"You are not sleeping in that chair Y/N" Conrad said, taking a pair of blankets under his arm. "Let's go Reg, the truck will be more comfortable and safer than the floor, we will see you in the morning" He said and reg followed him making it impossible for you to reply. "Also" He had holding the door open for you "Saya tidak percaya suami anda" I don't trust your husband He said putting a venomous inflection in the word husband.

"Oh please don't" You said tired and embarrassed "Do you speak Malay?" You asked when you were at the truck but you didn't come up and let Slivko in first. The night was humid and hot, and you couldn't believe you'll have to wait another two days for a bath.

"I told you I have been here before" He answered, and took a cigarette to his lips, and offered you another.

"Well at least that was true" You said and let him light the cigarette for you.

"Isteri?" He asked again, imitating the disgusting tone Shukri used, and you rolled your eyes at him.

"Let it go Captain" You said taking one long puff "Is just the delusion of a crazy man"

"I think there has to be an interesting story behind" He said facing you and looking you again with his perfect blue eyes.

"Well if you really want to know. I have been here for about five years" You started and look at the quiet village in front of you. "And at first I spend every little money I still had buying medicine from Noah, one day I was trying to help a kid from this village"

"The little guard that welcome us?" He asked throwing the cigarette butt to the ground.

"Yeah, precisely." You said mimicking his movements "Anyway he needed medicine and I couldn't find it, so I talk to the village lider, Shukri's father, and he send his man to "get" the medicine from a local hospital in Bandar. The boy lived and they asked me to check on the rest of the kids. And boy they were in poor shape. So I make a deal with him, I will take his money, and get the medicine peacefully from Noah, if they gave me enough to help others. So long story short I'm kind of a pharmacist for them"

"That's a compelling story" Conrad said rising a brow to you. "But doesn't answer my question"

"Shukri's dad died, and he is a crazy sociopath, who thinks he would take down the Malaysian government with drugs and weapons trafficking. He said to the people that he is their father, and since I take care of his sick children as a mother..."

"You are his wife" He said bitterly "That's a clever way to get a wife without the effort"

"He is just an stupid man" You said crossing your arms "And honestly you didn't have to literally put yourself between us, I have been doing this for long enough to take care of myself. But thank you" You poke his feet with yours.

"You are welcome" He said grinning at you and making a head gesture to you. And at that moment you wanted to forget you were suppose to be mad at him, maybe it was the tiredness or maybe it was how gorgeous he looked under the stars, but you feel the need for him to hold you again.

"Yeah yeah! Is all beautiful, can you two shut the fuck up and go to sleep already??" Reg voice shout from inside the truck and you realized how late it was.

"He is right, you sleep in there, I will be in the back so I can guard the medicine" He said and you agreed

"Captain" You said climbing in to the truck.

"Doctor" He gave you a wink that paralyzed you and walk to the back of the truck. You were glad you were in talking terms now, but you knew there was still a long way to follow to Borneo and you were certain he and the other men were not being completely honest with you. So you were not planning on lowering your guard, at least not yet.

[gguktastic]

Some Things Shouldn't Be Kept Secret.

A/N - I am exhausted. This has taken three days. My finals are coming up in a month. I have had to complete the question and answers to two chapters in our 2nd Language Studies, which is Hindi. I had to write two informal letters and a 7-page-long essay on what I did when I visited my native village, how I spent NYE, and the essay was to be written about a house on fire. Then Maths. You'd better be happy with this one, guys. This is VERY LONG, so sorry if you don't like such long imagines. Also what even is the title I am horrible at that stuff. Also, I had the inspiration for the 'diary' part of the fic (WOOP WOOP SPOILER) from somewhere else, whether it was a published book or an imagine, it just crossed my mind and I wrote it down. GENRE - Fluff. WARNINGS - None. // It had been a particularly great day for me yesterday. I had begun the day with a much-needed mug of coffee, and finally having a bagel after several weeks, managing not to burn it, for once. After an insanely amazing and relaxing shower, I had flopped onto my bed, logged onto tumblr, and stayed there for the next 3 hours in the fluffiest onesie I owned. #BestMorningEver. Then, when I finally decided to head out of the house to go pick up some groceries, I ran into an old friend. Not any old friend, mind you, my best friend from when I lived in Lancashire. Also, it doesn't hurt to mention, that the 'old friend' I bumped into was world-famous-YouTuber, Phil Lester I had been looking for microwaveable popcorn with the extra butter at Tesco, and then, when I finally found it, it was too high for me to reach. Tesco with it's bloody high shelves. I was looking around for help, when a shopping trolley rammed me from behind. I almost fell onto the dirty linoleum floor of the super market when I tried to steady myself on my cart, which was right in front of me. Of course, me being an incredible clumsy person, tripped thrice over my own legs while trying to do so, and pushed my cart away from me, which collided into a wall, the groceries spilling out. I had, however, steadied myself - successfully and without dropping anything - on a rack beside me, thankfully on my feet instead of being flat on my stomach. (A/N - That has actually happened to me, guys. It has been inspired by real, true life events). Now you're wondering- [Y/N], so you had the best morning ever with coffee, un-burnt bagels, and then three hours of scrolling through tumblr in your fluffiest onesie, but when you said 'particularly great day' - well, doesn't that mean the whole day went by smoothly and don't you think almost falling over onto your stomach in Tesco and ramming your shopping cart against a wall in the space of 7 seconds puts a sour spot on your day? Well, it was all okay because the person that rammed into me from behind was my long-lost best friend, who recognised me as soon as I turned around to look at him and graciously accept any apology he offered, and smothered me in the warmest hug ever. I tensed up and pulled myself away from them. It took me a few seconds of scrutinising their hopeful face to realise who the man was. When I did realise, my mouth dropped open. "Oh my god, are you Phil? Phil Lester?" I said, overwhelmed, as he just nodded his head enthusiastically. "Yes, yes, I am! And would you be [Y/N] from Rawtenstall, Lancashire?" He asked, hope shining in his eyes. I too nodded enthusiastically and, after a second of grinning at each other, he grasped my hands and looked me in the eyes. "Don't worry, [Y/N], I don't hold you responsible for the dead rabbit on my parents' bed incident." I burst out laughing as I recalled Phil's sad face as his mum yelled at him for putting a dead rabbit on her bed, something which had been my idea. He pulled me into a hug again and, this time, I hugged back. "It's been so long, [Y/N]," Phil said as we hugged. "No kidding, Mister Famous," I joked. He pulled away and began to say something when he looked over my shoulder to see my groceries fallen out of my trolley. He frowned and ran to it, and, in a minute, got my trolley back to me, the cracked eggs now paid for and replaced. I thanked him. "No problem, [Y/N]! It's so nice meeting you after all of these years! How about I give you my phone number and address so we can meet up at my place sometime?" He suggested. "Why not, Philly! Here you go," I said, unlocking my phone and giving it to him, allowing him to put in save his contact as, of course, Phil Striker 🦁🐗. He put in his address in notes, and handed my phone back to me. "Well, I think I should leave now-" I cut Phil off. "But could you just get me the extra butter popcorn from up there before you leave, Phil?" I asked, and he happily obliged, using his height to my advantage. I grabbed my popcorn from him as I gave him a small wave, him walking away, waving back at me. Coming back home, I lounged around, eating some Nutella from straight out of the jar, when I decided to text Phil about our plans. [Y/N]- Hi, Phil! It's [Y/N] here. So, about those palms for meeting up- don't wanna seem too eager, but are you free tomorrow? I could come over to your place if you like! Within minutes, Phil replied, Phil Striker 🦁🐗 - Hey [Y/N]! Btw what palms are you talking about? I blushed and face palmed when I saw the typo. (A/N - That was an actual typo I made while writing this. I decided to leave it in). [Y/N] - Oh Lord Jesus I hate myself. I meant plans, not palms. 😓 Phil Striker 🦁🐗 - hey that's k I was just joking around with ya! Oh and I'm completely free tomorrow, except that I need to film a video, so would you do it with me? I want to do the 'long-lost BFF challenge tag' with you. Let's see how much you and I remember 😜 and then we can go out for dinner, though do you mind if Dan (room mate fellow YouTuber and current BFFL - soz) tags along? I laughed at his message. He wanted to do a video with me? I decided to give the man-child what he wanted. [Y/N] - Whew thanks! Oh and sure no prob, I'll be glad to (tho you'll have to help me with my camera shyness k) and I am offended Phil Lester you replaced me how could you?! Jk don't worry ofc he can tag along no prob. Phil replied 10 minutes later. Phil Striker 🦁🐗 - Sorry [Y/N], Dan yelled at me for eating his cereal without his permission ): and thank you! Ps Whew for a second I was worried you were actually offended. I grinned at my screen. [Y/N] - You need to learn how to be a good room mate Phil Michael Lester you cereal-thief. And no prob, I'm sure Dan will be lovely as well (: haha don't worry I won't ever be offended by that we had lost contact for so many years after all! See you then, gtg, the monster in my stomach wants some food. Your place tomorrow, then? I'll be there by 5:00? If you're not okay with that time or want to shift to another day that's fine (: I put my phone aside to get a cookie, but was interrupted by the harsh 'ping!' Of my phone. I sat back down on the couch. Phil Striker 🦁🐗 - No no no that time and place are k! And I know I have a problem I need to be a better room mate and deserve to live in shame (A/N - Phil missed the 'to leave' after the 'to live' high five if you got my reference before reading this A/N. Back to the story now). I smiled. [Y/N] - Sure, Phil, see you tommorow! Also, you were very correct about having to live in great shame. Jk. You're AMAZING, PHIL (Bd-Dm-tss). Bye - for now! My phone 'ping!'- ed with one last text from Phil. Phil Striker 🦁🐗 - Hmm I read that pun out to Dan and he's still cringing you already have a bad impression well bye to you too and see you tomorrow, I have to go to Tesco (again) to get some more cereal for Dan because I forgot to earlier today ): the things this boy makes me do. I laughed and just responded with a 'Haha, bye!', as I tossed my phone onto my couch, it landing safely, but not before doing three triple loops in the air and almost giving me a heart attack. I softly laughed at yesterday's memories, as I waited for the lift to reach the 11th floor of the building. 9... 10... I nervously bounced on the balls of my feet, careful not to be too excited, scared that the lift would shudder and fall down. 11. I heaved a sigh of relief - the lift was incredibly slow, and I was not doing too well in such a cramped space. It felt like the nervous energy radiating from me bounced off of the four walls, ricocheting back into me. Did that make sense? I don't even know. The lift doors opened, and I was out the second they did - closed, cramped, spaces are not my friends. At least I had stopped having panic attacks now. Phil, however, had helped me out every time I had a panic attack on a lift, when we were still in contact. I had to use a lift almost everyday while I was an intern at the Rawtenstall Times after a course in Journalism at university. I remember having his contact open on my phone, and calling him as soon as I got into whichever lift was empty and functional. He would stay on the line with me for whatever length of time I needed him to be. Thankfully for me - and our phone bills - never in my life have I had to suffer through several minutes and even hours of pure terror in case of the lift braking down. After seven years, I finally had the option to call him if I had a panic attack, and I was finally getting to sit down and talk to him about the most random of things like we used to. I knocked on the white door. Just two layers of paint and a moderately thick wall separating me from my once-best-friend. I anxiously drummed my fingers on my thigh, my eyes flitting from one spot on the monotone grey carpet to another. Finally, after a painstakingly long minute, I was blessed with the visual and sound of the doorknob turning. As the door opened, I grinned wide and prepared to greet my friend who opened the door - except that instead of the raven black hair and blue-green-yellow eyes, what I saw were twinkling brown eyes, ones you could easily get lost into, and a slightly-wavy chocolate brown fringe. "Not to sound rude, but-may I know who you are?" The man asked. My grin, which had faltered just for a second, returned as a much smaller version of itself. "Hi, I'm [Y/N]. I'm here to meet Phil," I said, extending my hand to the incredibly tall man, not unlike Phil. He opened the door wider, and took my hand, shaking it. "Oh, nice meeting you, [Y/N]. Phil told me you'd be coming by today. My name is Dan, by the way, I'm Phil's room mate," he said, and I smiled at him. I opened my mouth to say that I had heard about him, when realisation dawned in his eyes. "Oh, I'm sorry, come on in!" He said, and I thanked him before entering. Dan led me to the lounge, where we were making small talk, when Phil walked in, wearing black skinny jeans and a red-and-black button up. His eyes brightened up. "Oh, hello, [Y/N]! Dan, this is the friend I was telling you about. I'm so sorry to keep you waiting, [Y/N], I was actually in the shower," he said, sounding truly apologetic. I laughed. "Don't worry, Phil, I don't mind. Also, I got that you were in the shower as soon as I walked in, hearing your soulful and romantic rendition of 'My Heart Will Go On'," I said, making Dan guffaw. Phil's cheeks were painted with an angry red blush as he mumbled something about Dan and I not recognising his artistic abilities. "Well, [Y/N], even after you have mercilessly shamed me for honing my artistic abilities, I'm still willing to do that video with you, for I am the kind prince of England," he said, taking a 'regal' pose. I laughed again, getting up and off the couch, as Dan just rolled his eyes and leant back in what he had told me was his 'Sofa Crease'. "Have fun, you guys," Dan said, as we disappeared into Phil's room. // "I completely and utterly destroyed you at the challenge tag, [Y/N]," said Phil proudly as we got out of the room, after filming the video for his channel. I shrugged. "Well, at least I remembered all of the embarrassing stories, so that's fine," I said. "But you could've stalked me on social media and found out all of those facts about me, and yet, I WON," Phil said, smug smirk placed upon his face. Dan interrupted our small little argument. "That aside- Phil, you never told me how you 'bumped into' [Y/N] yesterday," he said, eyebrows raised as his eyes remained focused on the screen of his laptop. "I met her at Tesco, I actually accidentally rammed into her with my shopping cart from behind-" Dan snorted. "Wow, Phil, you meet a friend after seven years and how? Because you rammed your shopping cart into them. Good going, mate," He said, not once looking up at us as he slowly munched on Doritos from a bag and scrolled through, from what I could see, tumblr. I sat down beside him before putting my hand into the bag and starting to eat the Doritos. Either Dan didn't notice, or he just didn't mind. "You know how clumsy I can be! Anyways, when I did, [Y/N] almost fell down but, using my super strength, I caught the damsel in distress in my muscular arms. She -" I cut Phil off. "-is so horrified by the lies you are telling your best friend that she has decided to ask you to tell the truth," I said, glaring at Phil. He sighed. "Okay, I'll tell you the truth- or is it?" He said, wiggling his eyebrows. Dan and I looked at him, annoyed. "Okay, fine. So what happened was that [Y/N] tried to steady herself by grasping onto the cart, but tripped thrice over her own feet and pushed the cart away, which then rammed into the wall and most of her groceries spilt out while [Y/N] managed to actually and successfully steady herself using the ledge of one of the shelves nearby." Dan looked throughly amused. "And then, when I turned around to look at the person who had rammed into me and then graciously accept any apology they offered, Phil hugged me," I said, and Dan's head snapped up, eyes wide. "You did WHAT?!" He said, looking at Phil, who looked just as confused as I was. "Dan, I just hugged my friend-" Dan cut him off. "You idiot! What if it had been some other random person who you didn't know instead of [Y/N]? You could've been reported to the authorities!" He said, almost yelling at Phil. I nodded in agreement. "Yeah, Phil, what if I was a middle aged mum whose husband was just down the aisle, gazing lovingly at his beautiful wife?" I said. "Okay, you could've been anyone, but I recognised you from the tattoo on your wrist-It's a heart-rate thingy with the twenty one pilots logo at the end and, below it, in neat cursive, 'Stay Alive' is written. Which middle aged mum has a tattoo like that?" He said. "Okay, so you have a valid point," I said. "Now, who wants some brownies?" // I groaned as I turned around in bed, trying to shut the alarm off. It was a Sunday,and I didn't have to go to work. Yesterday had been the 10th time in a row that I had dropped by Dan and Phil's place. Dan, Phil, and I had plans to hang out this whole week as well, and I was supposed to be over at the 'Phlat' (or the 'Phalace Of Dreams', as Dan sometimes referred to it as) in an hour to help Dan film a video. I, of course, would be behind the camera, not in view of it. I lazily got up from bed, walking into the bathroom. I let the water heat as I got out of my clothes, stepping into the now pleasantly hot water. I just stood in the cubicle, letting the water run down my body, relaxing my muscles and taking away all of the exhaustion from the day before with it as it fell down the drain. 15 minutes later, I was done, as I stepped out of the shower wrapped in a fluffy towel. Seeing as I was already comfortable being in my pyjamas around Dan and Phil, I decided to wear an old MCR merch tee with my trademark light-wash skinny jeans and worn-out sneakers. Today, I felt extravagant, so I took a cab from my place to the Phlat, seeing as it was a 15 minute walk and I was not in the mood. As I sat in the cab, I put my hand in my fringed satchel to get some money out, only to be met with the sinking feeling of not having my trusty notebook there. It was a small A5 sized leather bound notepad, into which I jotted down my reminders, lists and also about the highlights of my day. It was the first thing I'd rescue if my house was on fire, that's how important it was. And it definitely wasn't at my place. It must be at Dan and Phil's place. I let out a sigh of relief at the fact that if it wasn't at my place or in my bag, it would be at Dan and Phil's, and they knew better than to peek in it. That's because Phil had once tried and then got a pillow thrown at him at full force. They wouldn't dare. They better wouldn't. // As soon as I let myself into the house after Dan opened the door for me, I had known something was wrong. Without so much as a 'hello' to me, he told me to follow him. Dan led us over to the lounge, and asked me to take a seat as he closed the door behind him. He took a deep breath as he took the seat beside me, looking down at his feet. "So, I found something..." He said, all flustered. Forget the diary, Dan's behaviour was #1 on 'The List Of Things [Y/N] Is Currently Concerned About.' "Continue," I said. "And, um- there were some things written about me which flattered me," he mumbled, me, however, being able to catch every word he said. "And...?" He pulled his hands out from behind his back, and my whole world came crashing down. My diary. "May I ask, Miss [Y/L/N], what this object is?" He asked, any trace of being flustered gone. His nervous twitching of the left hand was now replaced by a confident and smug smile on his face that he tried, and failed, to conceal. It was my turn to blush. "I- uh- I work at a- a newspaper office," I said. "And t- that's just the diary I write in. You know ideas f- for my column." I hadn't been lying about me working at a newspaper office. I was interning at the Daily Mail, where I would soon get a job under the Teen Magazine section, where I would write articles for teens. (A/N- I know nothing about the Daily Mail. Just making things up over here). However, I did lie about writing down ideas for my column in that diary. In that moment, if the world hasn't crashed badly enough around me before, the pieces burst into flames as Dan opened to a page and started to read. "18th of February, 2017, I just came back from the Phlat and had a genuinely good time with Dan. When I looked him up, I mean- he was actually so good looking- but now that I know what he is really like, I think I might really like him. 21st of February, 2017, woah, just had the best day ever with Dan! Phil was out today, so Dan called me over to help film a video of his. Later, we had Chinese take out for dinner, and I felt my gut do a 180 whenever we made physical contact. I'm actually falling for him hard, aren't I?" Dan snapped the book shut and looked up at my face, which was painted with a violent crimson. "You just go on and on about how you love my smile, my eyes, me, for a whole week, [Y/N]. And then, I stumbled across this paragraph," he said, and I knew which paragraph he was talking about. "28th of February, 2017, I'm still at their place, but they're currently not in the room, so I thought, why not? Just wanted to write about how I utterly wanted to kiss Dan Howell then and there after he opened he door, shirtless, hair not straightened. Well, they're back now, so goodbye." Dan smiled bashfully at me. Some of the blush had started to creep back into his cheeks, and I was currently biting my bottom lip, looking down at my tattoo, very embarrassed. Again, I felt my guts do a one-eighty as Dan lifted my chin up with his thumb, making me look at him. I fiddled with the aquamarine ends of my black hair, as I looked up at Dan with my green eyes. He leaned down, our foreheads touching, and smiled at me. Those dimples are going to be the death of me. "[Y/N], like how you wanted to kiss me yesterday when I opened the door for you, I have wanted to do that ever since Phil told me about the bad pun you had texted him, before I had even seen you. I've been madly and truly in love with you, [Y/N]. It seems impossible that these feelings could develop in just 10 days, but they did, didn't they?" Saying so, he put his lips upon mine. The first thing that crossed my mind was that this was the first kiss that had held any meaning to me. Sure, I had had my first kiss at a party while we played Spin The Bottle, but they didn't open up the gates to zoo in '[Y/N]-tummy-land'. I remembered that my breath could be stale by now, considering the fact that I had run out of tic-tacs to eat in the lift, but reminded myself that I had brushed not an hour ago. I felt my eyes flutter shut as Dan pulled me closer to him, hoisting me onto his lap. I tangled a hand in his curly hobbit-hair, the other on his cheek. He ran a hand through my freshly-washed, soft, and untangled hair, easing it out of his ponytail. His other hand encircled my waist, pulling me closer every time I pulled my body away from his. At this point, a kiss would've probably gotten much heated, but our's still remained sweet and innocent, yet heavily passionate. We slowly pulled away from each other, my eyes still closed as I touched my forehead to his. He bumped our noses together, making me giggle. Just then, the door opened and Phil entered. I turned to the door, eyes wide in horror, while Dan just gave Phil a crooked smile. Phil, in reply, almost dropped his laptop, and rushed out of the room, but not before Dan yelled out - "I JUST KISSED HER!" I, of course, blushed. The 'being flustered' soon changed to confusion. "Dan," I asked, "Why was he so terrified? I mean, sure, he acts like he's an innocent ray of sunshine, but we weren't even kissing that time! Why did he run away like that?" Dan turned away from the door, and looked at me. He grinned at me before replying: "Didn't you see? The camera was pointed towards us - he was doing a live stream."