#i think brownie is a gurl
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Brownie just left my room, then she came running back to sleep on my foot lol
#this feckin cat#brownie aka brongi#my dad's cat so i guess she my baby sister? lol#i think brownie is a gurl#tortishell
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Assorted fruit 🫶
#minecraft story mode#mcsm jesse#mcsm lukas#mcsm olivia#mcsm nell#mcsm radar#mcsm gill#bakery au#at least some of them are#wanted to draw Jesse in my clothes so that’s what the dress at the bottom is :)#Gill would LOVE California Gurls. he knows every word.#that one is also kind of a running joke between some friends#I don’t think Radar should take that brownie….#the bread is just because I needed to fill space#yeah I drew them kissing a lot. it was for practice#also they love each other#Jesse and Jesse doing the Sibling Stare is really funny to me#Olivia is in the corner because I love her. she’s so neat#my art
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just watched a YouTube video from a rather popular tumblr-adjacent content creator who was trying out various cursed recipes this site has spawned over the years and all throughout the video her cat is walking all over her kitchen counters and she keeps stopping to pet it and give it attention.
1. That animal walks where it shits and pisses. I don't care how much you love it, its feet don't belong on food prep surfaces for health reasons.
2. So you should be removing it from the counters when it tries to jump on them (or, ideally, from the room completely while you cook and working long-term to train it to stay off counters) and you certainly shouldn't be rewarding the behavior with positive reactions like pets and attention
3. And for the love of God if you ARE going to stop what you're doing to pet an animal please WASH YOUR HANDS before you go back to food prep!!!
they really just don't teach people about the fecal-oral pathway anymore huh
#personal#just think kids... any random brownies at the work potluck could be coming from a kitchen like this or worse#it looked like a sphynx type so at least there's minimal risk of hair in everything I guess#but gurl that does not make it sterile#your animals are not your children. I'm sorry but they're not.#they do not have a human brain they are not capable of holding up human hygiene standards and they have different needs than a human#and if you don't take these things into account when bringing one into your home you create problems for both of you
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As per request of @tired-jaz here's some dabi fluff for the touya fans 😈 This is purely fluff but here's a lil quick disclaimer ⚠️ jaz this isn't totally what you asked for but Its still fluff and got some pretty sweet stuff in it 😭(pun intended) HOPE YALL ENJOY‼️
NOT AS SWEET
AS YOU (dabi x reader)
DAY ONE ☎️
"3 months, THREE WHOLE MONTHS NAKI. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? I havent felt the touch of aan, MY MAN, in three whole months", you scream into the phone, not caring the damage youve dealt to your sisters eardrums.
"Y/N" she screams back.
"Yes..." you retorted sheepishly with a slight ansgt.
"Isnt he coming bacm in like what? 3 DAYS?? I hate to break it to you gurl, BUT PLEASE, calm down, I get it but he'll be there soon."
"BUT"
"NO. NO BUTS. What happened to the logical and rational you i know? The one dabi fell in love with? Youll have him all to yourself in no time. I know its hard, especially cause you haven't been able to talk to him either, but honey please. Hell be there alright. ALRIGHT?"
you sigh, "I'll calm down. You're right I guess, don't wanna embarrass myself in front of him after 3 months..." you breathe out staring at your feet face reddening at the thought of your desperate actions. "I just miss him, a lot."
"Y/n...I get it, i really do, and i hate to do this right now, but i have to go, if you need anything youll tell me right?"
"Yeah yeah you know I will", you respond rolling your eyes simultaneously.
"REMEMBER" the sudden loud tone sending you to jump up, "3 DAYS THEN HES ALL YOURS. BYE BYE!" she acreams ending the call with a kissy sound.
Your hand drops down, looking at the caller ID
"I know" you wisper to yourself.
DAY TWO 💤
Grogginess? She practically your bestfriend you think rolling over to the other aide of your bed, arm slewn over your back orher cupping the side of the pillow youve found yourself clutching for dear life to the past couple of months.
"Dabi..." you whisper, eyes squeezing shut trying to imagine his face again as you bury your face into the pillow
"please come home" is the last thing your pillow hears before you pass out on top of it wishing it was him you were on top of instead.
Nothing could quite distract you from his absence like sleeping your life away.
DAY THREE 🍰
Anxiety was eating you alive like you were the twilight saga and a book worm was having a feild day.
"Nothing has changed between us right?" you thought. "Right?" you repeat to yourself, a sickening smile creeping on your face with tears pricked in the corners of your eyes.
"NO" you yell sitting up to hang of your bed.
"I WILL NOT BE SAD. I REFUSE. ONE MORE DAY
"Y/N. YOU GOT THIS! I GOT THIS? I GOT THIS." you chant storming to your kitchen. Given the ungodly amount of sleep you got yesterday, you hadnt eaten barely anything but leftover cookies and some milk.
"OH. MY. GOD." you aggravatingly sighed out
"I'M SO DAMN HUNGRY" followed by a whine as the refridgerator swining open, and then the realization hit you, you wouldn't be surprised if dust and a moth flew out with the door.
"DAMN INGREDIENT HOUSEHOLD WHAT THE HELL" you yell falling to your knees while slamming the fridge shut, followed by a bang on the door with your fist.
Your head soon met the door as well with your begging you from 2 weeks ago to stop the decision of purely doordashing food to your front door while dabi was gone, leaving you broke as hell. Checking your bank account wasn't any better than the fridge, but in optimism you tell yourself, if theres one thing an ingredient household will get you, its crazy amazing dessert recipes made out of practically thin air.
-skip to later that night-
"Holy shit-" you breathe out
"Holy fucking shit, so. much. dessert. So many... everything?" you question scanning your kitchen surroundings, brownies, cookies, Tres Leches, cookie dough, instant jello, popsicles?
"How in the actual hell...did i make...popsicles..."
you whisper before collapsing of exhaustion.
Slowly picking up your phone to check the time, you read 2:45 a.m.
Following is a look of worry, exhaustion, and confusion as you pass out on the kitchen floor.
DAY FOUR - DABI'S COMING HOME
My keys slowy make their way into the key hole, first sturggling due to my franticness to see her. My girl.
"y/n" I whisper out getting frustrated that the key keeps getting stuck.
"Dammit!' i whisper yell as the door finnalg flys open crashing against the wall behind it.
"What the hell? Why does it smell like...HUH?"
He screeches feasting his eyes on the copious piles of desserts covering every kitchen surface.
"What the hell..." he whispers, barely taking the time to notice you crashed out on the kitchen floor.
"Y/n..." he whispers leaning down to you, a look of pity and concern stretching across his otherwise emotionless face.
"baby..." is the last thing he says before reaching behind your neck and waist to hoist you up into his arms.
A feeling of warmth overcomes your body, a feeling of comfort, one you cant quit explain while wrapped up in your Candy Land like dream, one where you of all people were a diety of dessert. Slowly coming back to consciousness you hear the words of your lover...
"baby" you feel whispered against your ear, the familar voice sending shocks through your body.
No matter the lack of sleep and energy spent on your Master Chef Desserts you shot up clinging to dabi like it was the last time.
"DABI" you screeched into his ear as he pulls you in closer.
He presses a kiss to your ear, "hey princess, missed you baby" he says pressing a second one right after the other.
The feeling practically melts you, nothing beats some sweet love from your lover, especially the physical lind.
"Dabi" you sigh
"Yes princess?"
"Kiss me again?"
"Hm?"
You grab his collar pulling his face for his eyes to look into yours.
"KISS ME" you growl locking his eyes with yours noticing the sly smirk spreading across his beautiful face.
"Alright alright, i heard you the first time" he chuckles cupping your cheek and pulling your waist flush against his stomach.
"Since you ask so nicely..." he teases bringing your face close to his.
You can't explain it, maybe its the lack of him you've experienced the past three months or his overall deamenor but its like you cant think anymore. Everythings fuzzy, your nose filled with the smell of the previously baked sweets mixed with the ash and cigarette smell on his collar. You lose complete control melting into his hands, making him work to keep your body up as his lips meet yours. You make note of the gentleness he's displaying, something not often seen, even behind closed doors. It doesn't feel like hes going to give you the night of your life, or like hes about to do whataver he wants to you, he feels like he's about to hold you until the sun comes up, bury his head in your neck, lay you on his chest kissing your head, whispering sweet nothings like
"you're so beautiful baby..."
or
"i missed you so much" followed by his nose burrowing in your hair.
'you miss me too pretty girl?"
maybe a
"Im here its alright princess..."
or maybe
"you need anything baby?"
its almost out of charcter for him, but somethings changed, the way he holds you, something happened. He holds you now like hes actaully scared to lose you. His kiss isn't filled with lust, but love, pure innocent love, one you've never felt, you think leaning more into the kiss slowly making your backs way down to the floor.
His lips press deeper into yours, never wanting to leave but nevertheless he pulls away leaning over your frozen body beneath him.
"Baby" he whispers moving your face so his eyes meet his, given you were hiding it out of embarrassment.
"Yes..." you wisper back peering up into his beautiful eyes, taking note of the difference in his stare. He holds there for awhile, staring into your eyes, searching in them like he'll find something, still holding your face lovingly.
Your left hand comes to meet his hand on your face cupping over it shooting him a small smile.
"Dabi? "
"Hm?" he hums back seeming to come back to reality.
"S-sorry" he stutters a bit, a like shade of pink running across his cheecks.
Your smile never leaves as you bring your other hand up to meet his face, pulling it down to your head to rest his forehead against yours.
"I love you" you whisper.
"Hm..." he hums with a slight chuckle sending a look of horror to your face. His laugh grows as he puts more pressure against your foreheads.
"I'm just teasing baby" he says moving his mouth to kiss your forehead as he pulls you up to sit with him, pulling his hand of your cheek to allow more balance on the way up.
"Just teasing" he repeats moving to kiss your cheek allowing another small smile to come up on your face as his hand meets your face again. He follows with small kisses peppering across your cheeks, forehead, nose, jaw line, and even some daring to your neck. All that's heard throughout your shared apartment is small giggles and the sound of his lips coming off of your skin.
"Hey princess" he says looking for some focus as he comes up to cup both your cheeks.
"Yes?"
"I love you."
Your face goes an ungodly red.
"Hm?" you question, face blank, leaving him to chuckle to himself.
"I love you baby" he repeats giving you a warm smile leaning his forhead bacm against yours.
"I..." you smile back... "I love you too dabi" you whisper allowing his lips to come back to yours for one final kiss before your mouths are otherwise occupied scarfing down the pile of treats waiting for you on the counter.
"Pretty sweet huh?" you tease bumping your hips into his.
"Not as sweet as you baby" he replies a sweet smile spreading on both your faces as you match each other's gaze.
#mha#dabi x reader fluff#dabi x reader#mha dabi#bnha dabi#requestandrespond#angst with a happy ending#request#fanfiction#ff#dabi dabi pls just one chance dabi#i can fix him#i will fix him
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zack brownie saying its just the car but his golden boy can't beat max even in the fastest car
GURL IDC IM POPPING THEM TAYVIS PILLS TAYLOR SWIFT POSTED TRAVIS ON IG AND 3 PHOTOS IN ONE POST AND U THINK I CARE AB VROOM VROOM SPORT????
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No, no. It's fine, babe. "Extroverted introvert", hihi, same. Absolutely not ashamed of being in love with man that non existing. Sometimes I think it's more normal that being in love with the real one. Have you seen them? Lord have mercy... Rom coms... gurl. If we got ourself because of them in high standards, what happened with men that watched them? XD I needed to google 'slutty brownies', not popular in my part of Europe I guess. BUT NOW I WANT IT. <3<3<3
But really, why are fictional men so...so...UGH. They're too perfect.
And oh my gosh - I completely forgot that people don't necessarily know what slutty brownies are 😂
I don't know what comes up on Google but the way I make them:
Chocolate chip cookie dough pressed to the bottom, a layer of oreos, brownie batter poured on top and baked. THEN I put crushed up oreos on top, sometimes I'll also add some crushed up potato chips AND/OR melted peanut butter or Carmel sauce 🤌🏻
They're sinful and rich. They're gooey. And oh so slutty and they're perfection.
Pop on a movie with two idiots in love who are too stubborn to realize it while eating them? Amazing.
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GURL YES IT WAS ON TV LAST NIGHT AND THE ENTIRE TIME I WAS LIKE JUMIN AND MC JUMIN AND MC!!! But yes I came from a YOI imagines blog who recommended you and I’m glad I came! But seriously take your time with it and do NOT be afraid to SHATTER MY HEART MERCILESSLY. Honestly I think we are living the same life in different places! Have a great week my friend!
money can’t buy happiness - Jumin Han
The original request:
Warnings: angst
Summary: dating Jumin Han meant constantly being in the spotlight. However, the press had a vendetta against you. At what point does your sanity take priority over your love towards Jumin? Will almost definitely get a happy pt 2 resolution if someone asks for it bc writing angst makes me sad lmaoo
[support me :)]
You were taking a shower. It was getting late and Jumin wasn’t home yet. The two of you had been dating for about four months and he asked you to move in with him. With you being in the public eye so much, he felt better knowing his security team could keep an eye on you.
You heard a knock on the bathroom door. It opened then shut. “I’m home, My Love. Sorry to have kept you waiting.”
You opened the shower door and leaned over to give him a peck on the lips, then focused back to your shower.
“You mind if I join you?” He asked, pulling his tie to loosen it.
“I... uh-“ you had been sort of self-conscious about your appearance lately. The media didn’t help; they were always reporting on how you looked. You didn’t let Jumin know. You knew it’d only worry him. “Okay. If you want.”
He deftly undid the buttons of his shirt and got undressed, slipping into the shower with you. He wrapped his arms around you in a tight embrace. “I’ve missed you,” he whispered, pushing a damp strand of hair out of your face. “You want help washing up?” He had a goofy grin on his face, hand settling on your hip.
“I... I’m not feeling really good about myself... and my body image today,” you confessed, staring at the water droplets on the shower wall.
“I wish you wouldn’t read those news articles. They’re horrible.” He carefully turned you in his arms so you were facing him. “You know I think you’re the most beautiful person in the world.”
“‘Jumin Han’s partner is gaining weight. Could a child be on the way?’” You quoted the article, word-for-word. It was etched into your memory. “I just was popping my hip out to the side. I don’t know. I thought I was being trendy. But they thought I was pregnant?!”
“Don’t listen to a thing they say.”
“I kind of look pregnant though. I need to lose some weight.” You bent over and got some shampoo, massaging the soap into his hair.
His eyes fluttered shut at the sensation. “You look perfect. That feels nice.”
“I just hate how they talk about anything and everything. You have a meeting with a woman? You’re cheating on me. I’m carrying a different purse? I’m a gold digger. I put all my weight on one foot, heaven forbid, and all of a sudden I’m pregnant.” You clapped your hands together, soap spraying against the shower door. “It just sucks.”
“I’m sorry.” He grabbed some conditioner to return the favor. “I got you some more flowers. I know it won’t make up for it all, but I thought they were nice.”
“Mhm. That is nice.”
“Let’s go out for dinner tonight too,” he offered.
“Last thing I need is more people thinking I’m eating too much.”
He pouted. “You’ve gotta eat somehow though.” The two of you stood under the stream of the shower. “I’ll get us a private room? At your favorite place too.”
You sighed. “It’s late Jumin. Don’t make more work for Jaehee.”
“I’ll do it myself then.” He stooped down to kiss your cheek. “Anything for you.”
The two of you got out of the shower and wrapped up in your towels and Jumin wasted no time calling the restaurant. “Hi!” He sounded overly excited. You laughed. “Oh... yes I can hold.”
“This is what it’s like to be a commoner,” you chuckled, pulling out a clean dress shirt for him to wear. Powder blue. He wore too many pinstripes. You really liked the way the color looked on him. You had a dress in the same color. He bought it for you when you bought him that shirt for his birthday; he thought it was cute when you’d match.
“Yes. No problem. This is Jumin Han... Oh! No worries. I was just hoping I could book a private room for a half hour from now,” he was so cute and flustered on the phone. He likely had never done this before. “Yes, that’d be great. Thank you.”
He hung up the phone and you laughed, giving him a hug. “You’re so freaking cute,” you uttered, your towel slipping down your body from the eagerness of the embrace. You pulled back. “I picked out some clothes for us, if you like ‘em.”
He glanced over at the clothes you had hung up and nodded. “Perfect. You’ll look so beautiful in that.” He walked over and grabbed his clothes, taking them off the hanger and starting to dress.
“Don’t forget to call Driver Kim,” you reminded him, picking out a pair of shoes.
“I texted him already. No worries.”
You turned to grin at him and he was already half-dressed. You couldn’t tear your eyes away as he buttoned up the shirt, hiding more and more of his perfect figure. He paused on the top button. “You’re staring.”
“I can’t help it. You’re just so handsome,” you giggled, walking towards him and helping him with the top button. “Will you zip up my dress for me?” You turned your back towards him. He complied, zipping you up.
“Tie or no tie?” He asked, glancing at his reflection in the mirror.
“No tie.” You replied confidently. He nodded, putting on his suit jacket to complete the look.
You glanced at both of your reflections in the mirror. You laughed out loud. “I just realized my hair is soaking wet.” You pulled a hand up to run through his hair. “Yours too.”
“Oops. Guess I didn’t think about that. Why don’t you wear it up then?” He pulled your damp hair off your neck and held it up so you could get an idea of how it’d look with the hair away from your face. “Looks nice to me.”
“Okay,” you smiled. You checked the time on your phone. “We’re going to be late,” you chuckled, sitting down to put your hair up.
He grabbed your shoes and kneeled next to you, helping you step into the heels. As you put Bobby pins in your hair to ensure it looked nice, he grabbed a nude lipstick off the counter and applied it to your lips. “We make such a good team,” he chuckled. You looked at your reflection, satisfied with how well Jumin did on your lipstick.
“Do I look presentable enough?”
“You look breathtaking. Come now,” he offered you his hand and you grabbed it. “Driver Kim is out front.”
You had made it to the restaurant in no time. The staff was extremely nice, taking you to your own private room where you could enjoy each other’s company in peace. The dinner was lovely, but there were some bumps along the way. The waitress served Jumin a glass of wine and you a glass of water. Pregnant women couldn’t drink, of course. You tried to explain you weren’t pregnant. Your eyes were watery and honestly you were extremely embarrassed; it was challenging to get out the words. Luckily, all it took was Jumin requesting to “get her a glass of wine, please,” with a hard look on his face to fix that problem.
Luckily, the food was great. It was your favorite restaurant, after all. Jumin even offered to get dessert. All you wanted was a brownie, but they didn’t have brownies. They made you a brownie. You felt like an inconvenience, but Jumin tipped significantly to reassure you that there was no problem. You asked the chef to come out and thanked them for a their flexibility.
“I can’t believe everyone reads those articles,” you whined when you got in the car. “She really thought I was pregnant.”
“I’m sorry. I don’t know why she’d think that. The media is... challenging.”
“They hate me. Not that it matters. But wow. The press really is not fond of me,” you confessed, playing with a strand of hair that had fallen from your updo.
“They hate everyone.”
“Your father hates me too.”
“He only hates you because he wanted to date you instead of me. He thinks you’re lovely,” he defended his father.
You sighed and leaned your head on his shoulder. “I’m tired.”
“You can shut your eyes. I’ll be right here when you wake up.” He reassured you. You nuzzled into his shoulder to get more comfortable and shut your eyes.
You woke up to a clank sound. You sat up, startled. You were in bed? “Jumin,” you glanced at him, sunlight lighting his features. “Wow... I was pretty tired huh?”
“You were. It was adorable... but challenging... helping you get to bed.” He had the sweetest smile on his face. You realized you were in your pajamas. He had helped you get changed, taken off your makeup, and let your hair down, all while you were asleep?
“You’re the sweetest.” You glanced at the clock. He usually didn’t leave work for another hour, yet he was all dressed up already. “Come back to bed and lay with me?” You peeled the covers on his side of the bed down, offering him the spot.
“Wish I could, but I have an early meeting today.” He got down on his knee and gave you a kiss. “I made you pancakes though. Hopefully that’ll make up for it.” He stood back up, grabbing his watch and putting it on.
“I love you. Have a good day at work.” You smiled.
“Have a good day at home. I’ll try to be back as soon as I can, but I might be a little late. I’ll call you later.” He walked to the door to leave, but made his way back to you and kissed your lips once again. “Love you.” And with that, he was gone.
You opted to stay in bed with your pancakes for a while. What was shocking to you, though, was to see your name trending on Twitter. You sighed, opening the tag and bracing yourself for the worst. Gold Digger? Jumin Han’s Girlfriend Doesn’t Even Bother Dressing Up for her Nights Out, Endangering Baby, Sources Say. You groaned. You thought you looked okay. Jumin said you looked beautiful. You hadn’t even seen a camera, but there it was: another unflattering picture of you.
And at the top of the trending tag, a tweet from Sarah. “This girl is not only a home wrecker, ruining Jumin and I’s engagement, but an awful mother-to-be. She clearly only cares for herself.”
You hated this. All the replies were in support of her. Was that... no. Jumin’s father retweeted it too. A sob escaped your mouth. You’d never be good enough for him.
You were packing clothes in the suitcase before you even knew what you were doing. You didn’t know where you were going, but you were leaving. You left the dresses and gifts Jumin got you at the apartment; you were not a gold digger. You didn’t want anything to remind you of him; it’d hurt too bad.
You grabbed a piece of stationary off of the desk in the home office Jumin had installed. You pulled out a pen and began writing. You couldn’t abandon him with nothing. Your heart wouldn’t let you.
Jumin,
I’m sorry. I was never the girl your father wanted me to be. Never the girl the press thought you deserved. I was always kidding myself by thinking I was the right fit for you.
You’ve been raised in the spotlight your whole life. You’re brave and confident and never let anything get to you. I, on the other hand, am sensitive, fragile, and unrefined. I can’t stand in the spotlight; I’ve messed up a million times and I would just keep messing up if I let myself.
It’s not so much that the media has gotten to me; that everyone has turned against me and sided with Sarah... even your father. It’s that I know this will never stop. There will always be problems with me around. You will never have a moment of peace with me. You’ll never be able to walk into a room with me without hearing the whispers. I notice them everywhere I go.
That’s why I have to leave. For you. For your company. And because I’m not strong enough. I’m not who you thought so highly of; I’m an imposter. I could never succeed in your world.
Don’t come looking for me. I don’t even know where I’m going, I just know I need to get away. Get married to Sarah, or someone else refined and beautiful and polite. You deserve the perfect woman who society loves and who knows exactly what to do. That’s not me. It never will be.
I love you, and I wish you only the best.
You were sobbing. There was no point in signing your name. The teardrops littered all over the paper were signature enough. You dropped the note on the bed, grabbed the suitcase, and headed to the door. You were in leggings and a hoodie, sunglasses obstructing most of your face. The last thing you needed was to draw more attention to yourself.
You took a taxi to the airport. You paid for everything with your own money. You left the credit card Jumin had given you at home. You didn’t need to take anything from him. You went to the front desk and booked the cheapest flight as far away as possible. You had always wanted to go to Orlando, you figured. Maybe you could go to Disney World and spend the day sobbing at the happiest place on earth.
You checked your suitcase, went through security, got a drink from Starbucks, and settled down at the gate, waiting for your flight. You cried openly at the airport. Who cared at this point? You couldn’t eat. The only thing giving you any sustenance being the drink in front of you. Eventually they called your boarding group.
You weren’t in first-class, like you usually were with Jumin. No, you were in a cramped row of three at the back of the plane. It was refreshing. You were leaving your old life behind. You glanced out the window as you walked towards your seat. Goodbye Jumin. Goodbye RFA. You should have called Seven and told him. Told him not to track you down at the very least. You’d have to purchase a new phone. You were going to start completely anew. You sniffled, but kept walking down the aisle to your seat, each step feeling like purgatory as you felt the distance from Jumin increase.
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I always took at as: The wand didn't create that version of Star, it simply projected an alternate version of her that already existed. So the Star that went in is currently in another timeline so similar it might as well be the same one; same for the Star that came out.
The wand is just weird. Even without the Book of Spells to give us some guidelines, it's pretty weird. The entire thing changes shape depending on who's holding it, it projects the imagination, emotions, and mental state of its wielder so heavily that entire pocket dimensions exist comfortably inside it, some of which are probably only figments of imagination and/or magic and don't have any real bearing on reality. And the crystal itself canonically exists in two places at once, given it acts a portal directly to the Realm of Magic (that, I guess, can only be entered once it's cleaved?).
So it's really not too outside the realm of possibility to think it also bends space-time. Especially since, well, it literally did bend space and time in multiple episodes. Easily. Like what even???? What kind of raw power????? Honestly??????
hey I just realized something
in Into the Wand, the Star that comes out of the wand is not the one that came in. if anything the wand creates is made of magic, doesn’t that mean that Star should’ve died when magic was destroyed?
#at most the original star is probably in a timeline where she doesnt put frosting on brownies and marco doesnt wear ballet shoes#but thats as far as the differences will go#the timelines and the different versions of star might as well not be different at all#basically its of no consequence that theyre different#i think we even got an example of this in into the wand#when all the other stars are following her to the castle#and the whole line of them just goes hello! in rapid succession#and then you just hear one star in the very back go hey gurl
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headcanon - Steve as a Dad
request: Assuming that this is possible if he doesnt get killed off, can you give me some headcanons of present day steve as an actual dad? With his own kids? How is he with them?
warnings: none!
a/n: this request ruined me and its literally ALL I have been thinking about. duffer bros just look at the possibilities.... do not kill this man off. let him have a daughter I am begging u .... also made this more Steve centric than reader centric bc sometimes u just gotta focus on our boi
===
Steve never really thought about being a dad until he was one
after he became a dad, he decided it was the greatest honor of his life
he loved his kid more than life itself and he vowed to never be like his father
Steve would always offer to take care of the baby in the middle of the night
and even though he was sleep deprived to the max, he just wanted to be close to them
he also loves singing his baby lullabies!!! from little nursery rhyme ones to singing inappropriate songs, he just loved to sing
when he’s at work, all he can think about is his little family and how much he misses them
he keeps pictures of them in his wallet and pretty much shows every single person them
when his child is growing up, Steve makes sure to do all the stereotypical dad stuff
catch? absolutely
teaching them how to ride a bike? you bet
arts and crafts? Steve wasn’t super great at them but he would always offer to help his little girl make things
also he definitely has tea parties with his kids and sticks his pinky out - “it’s sophisticated”
he is also a sucker - he will buy them anything they want, much to the chagrin of his partner
but he does it anyway because he thinks they should be spoiled!
Steve definitely stays up super late with them and ends up falling asleep while reading them a bedtime story or playing games
he’s really good at warding off the monsters, especially since he’s done it before
and because of this, he’s very protective and vigilant around them
he gently explains to his kid(s) about the evil in the world but promises he’s always there to protect them
(he wants to show them the bat but decides not to)
Steve packs them the COOLEST lunches since he’s so good at cooking and baking
everyone is always really jealous of the lunches he packs and sometimes Steve packs extra for their friends
someone’s birthday in class? he’s baking brownies god dammit
Steve’s certifiably cool and everyone wants him to be their dad
he also definitely casually adopts children who don’t have good parents, and he definitely makes sure everyone is taken care of
Steve’s also the type of dad to make his kids wear their helmets and knee pads while riding their bikes
he likes to act very laid back but when his kids are gone be bites his nails, worried that they’ll get hurt
but his partner always ensures them that he’s a good dad who raised them right - they aren’t hooligans like Mike, Dustin, Will, and Lucas used to be
Steve gets frustrated when he can’t help his kids with their homework so he learns their material when he has the time and practically teaches it to them, learning something himself in the process
If he has a son, he definitely makes sure to give him proper, good advice about women - he doesn’t want his son to be like he was
If he has a daughter, he makes sure she knows to value herself and not give in to dumb boys (”trust me, I know the game they’re playing, they aren't worth it”)
Steve’s also the kind of dad who would let his kids drink and smoke in high school but only in the house - “I'd rather you do it here where you’re safe” (cue eye rolls)
when the kids grow up and enter high school everyone has a crush on their dad
Steve’s the PROUDEST dad alive when they graduate
you KNOW he brings a huge fuckin video recorder to the stadium and cries his eyes out - like, all you can hear is the announcer saying their name and then Steve wailing and shouting “that’s my kid!”
he doesn’t pressure them to do anything they don’t want to do - if college isn’t for them, that’s fine! he’s there to support them no matter what
and when they get into college he weeps for a week straight
and you KNOW he buys those sweaters that say “PITT DAD” “PROUD OF MY BEAR” etc
like, completely decked out in college gear
he’s really invested in his kid’s futures and their happiness
he definitely comes to their games, their musicals, WHATEVER they do
and he is always asking questions about their major and what they’re learning
he gives his kids space when they grow up but he gets really sad that they aren’t around
but he's always there for them, investing in their futures and making sure they’re happy
he just loves his family okay!!!
===
taglist (join here!): @harrington-ofhawkins @comedy-witch @gothackedalready @wolfish-willow @sassisaluxury @willowrose99 @harringtown @m-blasterrr @whimsicalwoodlands @anerroroccurrrrred @marvels-gurl @the-almond-dinger @ssanjuniperoo @darth-el @sourapplebaby @yall-wildin-like-siriusly @andyl394 @astil-be @troop-scoop @ilovebucketbarnes @with-a-little-bit-of-light
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JEPPS
Of course gurl!
Pushing a pull door/viceversa: Jess. She finds a door she can’t open and will not stop pulling/pushing on it until it budges open, not bothering to look for a sign that says its the other way round, she only stop when Quill has called her names many times ‘Jess! its the other way!’ ‘...oh.’.
Doodles little hearts on the desk: Jess. Probably in many other places too for Quill to find, like on post-it notes and then sticks them in their nightstand, or the closet, the kitchen, the library, they sometimes even have cute little messages.
Starts the tickle fights: Jess. She knows Quill hates tickling but he never gets angry with her so she will occasionally poke his side, watch him squirm for a moment and glare at her in silent warning before pouncing on him and tickling him till his panting.
Starts the pillow fights: Quill. Usually happens after he got tickled out of his mind, he will grab the closest pillow and smack Jessica over with it.
Falls asleep last: Quill. Insomnia, too much coffee, anxiety and all has him up late usually, so he just lays against Jess’ chest with a book in hand, quietly listening to her heartbeat.
Mistakes salt for sugar: Quill. First time was probably an accident, the next are all because Jess put the salt in the sugar container as a prank.
Lets the microwave beep at 1am: Quill. Midnight snacking or midnight cup of coffee/tea that usually makes Jess wake up cause she got light sleep. Then they eat the snack together.
Comes up with cheesy pick up lines: Jess. All to make her bf groan and roll his eyes to the back of his head cause she always does it in the most dramatic, extra way possible, she once even made a fake beard with makeup, put her hair under a cap and ‘hey gurl, ar u butt dialing me? cause I swear I heard ur ass calling me’.
Arranges the bookshelf in alphabetical order: Quill. Jess never remembers to put the books back in their place which gives her bf gray hairs.
Licks the spoon when making brownies: Jess. The brownies her bf makes are fucking delicious, and he knows she likes the batter so he always makes sure to leave a little in the bowl with the spoon for her to lick.
Buys candles for dinners: Jess. Gotta go that extra mile to make surprise romantic dinners.
Draws little tattoos on the other: Jess. She thinks her bf looks cute with silly tattoos on his arms, legs, shoulders, back, even stomach and chest when she can catch him laying shirtless.
Comes home with a souvenir magnet from vacation: Jess. Someone in this relationship has to be the one to brag about all the places they have been to together and its definitely going to be her.
Convinces the other to fill magazine couple surveys: Jess. She steals her brother’s magazines for this sole purpose.
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GURL SHUT THE HELL UP- my nuggets were not good💔💔 but they gave me a free brownie and apple pie so whatever i guess🙄
GIRL WHERE DID YOU GET THESE NUGGETS??? in the trash? HOW ARE NUGGETS NOT GOOD BYYYEEEE
And you didn’t think about giving me the brownie... wow I see 🙄😭😐 jskdksjsjsjjz
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Heya my lovely friend! 20, 26, 31, 32, 33, and 39 for the ask meme ✨✨
GURL, YOU TOO??? OMYGOD Y'ALL COMING TO MY INBOX AND MAKING ME CRY FROM SO MUCH LOVE, EYE-
20: Disney, Dreamworks, or Pixar?
I'd say Dreamworks! I'm really fond of films, those that star a real person or animated ones. However, I usually tend to prefer the former because of of my appreciation for the classic filming. And among these three, Dreamworks feature one of the best movies I like. Like Shutter Island, Lincoln, and The Ring. They are so GREAT like do I even have to explain??? Not to say Dreamworks animations like How to Train Your Dragon, The Shrek, Over the Hedge, Kung Fu Panda, and Megamind are films I would still want to watch again to this day. Of course Dreamworks has failures too, such as The Shark Tale and The Boss Baby. However, compared to Pixar and Disney (should I even separate them when they belong to one humongous conglomerate now?), Dreamworks have one of the most original stories I've ever encountered. Their characters are so fleshed out. They have notable positive traits, and flaws you can easily spot, which makes them feel so real. No tea to Disney and Pixar, but they usually have SoOOOOo many passable movies. Like "okay, i made a movie, guess that's okay" type of movies. They have very generic and predictable plotlines and most of their characters are just cardboard cut-outs of the typical protagonists. Sorry this is long. I'm really passionate about film. Music-wise tho, it goes to Disney. However since we're talking about film, not an album, screenplays matter to me the most.
26: What would you do if someone gave you flowers?
I would put those flowers in a vase and I would appreciate that someone who gave them to me. Especially if they researched the language of the flowers they've gifted me before giving them to me. If not, that's still okay. There's just gonna be plus points for the former. Though even if they are the former or the latter, I would still ask them why they gave me flowers instead of fruits. I love flowers though and I would really like to receive a bouquet because I've never experienced being given one. I just wanna know why not fruits.
31: Are you a fashionable person?
Oh hell yeah am I. I make the world my runway. And what I think is quirky about this thing with me, is that I don't follow the trends. I make my own trend. It's my pet peeve to see everybody almost wearing the same clothes just like everyone else. And, I just want to not be like that. I want to stand out (Sorry, the Aries in me is quaking). This is why I love LOVE the no-clothing-code in our universities because I can totally rock a grunge bitch outfit to a cutie girly girl look whenever I want. Even if I'm just wearing a jeans and shirt outfit, I'm sure as hell gonna spice some things up (not skin-showing-wise tho) and make you see I'm not JUST wearing some jeans and shirt. It's MY jeans and shirt outfit (I'm really passionate about fashion like srsly come hit me up if you need some fashion advice).
32: Do you like watching holiday movies?
It depends. If I want to get in the mood of Christmas, bc let's be real, adulthood makes us no longer feel the giddty feeling we used to have when we were kids when it comes to Christmas, then yeah, I'd like to watch holiday films. However, if they have a fucking terrible screenplay, I'd rather not waste my time. I like wating holiday-themed foods, fics, and short stories though.
33: Cookies or brownies?
Cookies!!! I love the hard but chewy and soft texture ir has and also the balance in its flavor! I don't like foods that are too sweet and it's not long ago I just discovered I'm allergic to some types of chocolate so brownies are just 😕 to me.
39: What’s your favorite random piece of decor in your house and room?
I don't have a favorite piece of decor aesthetic-wise. So I'm gonna go for practicality wise (I don't buy things that I won't use just for the sake of aesthetics, I love me a clean, and wide ass space in my home). And also, I can't rhink of any random stuff I love because my stuff here are not random lmao. In my house, I love my dining table. It's where I eat, do my nails, do my art, or work on my writings, while I watch the view of the sky from the windows near it. That table just has so many memories for me. And in my room, I love my work desk. It's where I put my bullet journal, skin care stuff, and writings-wise stuff. I just love how I put them in this way bc these things give me a sense of who I am in their own way. And also they give me a false sense of productivity for the day when they look so nice on that desk LMAO
#what about aera#aera games#asks over a cup of tea#this got so long im sorry#but#sophrosinn#im gonna blame this on you bc you sent me the questions i've also been waiting to answer#god i love you my best girl#thank you so much for dropping by
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Rest, Relaxation, & Kisses (a Mario AU)
Me??? Writing another one shot for @sugarglider9603 Mario Au in the middle of the night because I couldn’t sleep??? More likely then you think!!! Based on that one ask I saw, ENJOY!!!
It was rare that the princes had a completely free day to themselves, what with running a kingdom and the occasional kidnapping by Bowceit. Though even that was becoming a rarity ever since he and Prince Remy, a somewhat literal god of time and space, had started dating. Now Bowceit sometimes only kidnapped them out of boredom or if he needed a quick babysitter for the Danger Noodles. But even then, it wasn’t that bad.
Given that they now had a day off Roman seized this opportunity to have a royal spa day with Patton and Remy (who had also decided he needed a day off). He and Patton would have gladly spent their day off with their boyfriends but at the moment two plumbers in question were still attending to some business in the Ice Kingdom. So, a day of pampering as they waited for their beloveds it was then.
They had set up camp in Roman’s room, piles of blankets and pillows spread out amongst his larger then king size bed, along with plenty of snacks, nail polish, and other beauty essentials. The princes had all opted to change into pajamas, hair held back by headbands and pins, each with a different type of mud mask. A truly unprincely sight to behold but they didn’t care, it was their day off.
“So, you really got Bowceit to babysit ALL your Lumas?” Roman asked, adding another coat of pain over the space prince’s toes.
“Mmh, they actually listen to him, the little shits,” Remy replied, taking an extra long sip from his ever-present Starbucks cup “but I can’t blame them, he’s real sweet to them. It’s super cute seeing a giant lizard man be really soft around a bunch of kids.”
“His one and only redeeming quality,” Patton said, a bit passive aggressively as he blew on his drying finger nails.
“Patton, throwing shade? And at my man?” Remy gasped dramatically “I’d never thought I’d see the day!”
“Well I’m allowed to,” Patton pouted “it’s only fair after being kidnapped by him time and time again.”
“Agreed.” Roman replied without looking up from his work.
“Yeah, that’s fair,” Remy shrugged, taking another sip of coffee “I have been trying to get him into the habit of asking you guys to babysit for us instead of kidnapping you then asking. We’re getting there, slowly, but we’re getting there.”
“You know, he ruined my date with Virgil because of that?” Roman huffed bitterly “The one-time Verg agrees to go out dancing, at a festival mind you, and Bowceit has to come in and ruin it!”
“Tell me about it,” Patton whined “I was finally able to convince Lo to go to the tavern with me to do karaoke!”
“I would really like to spend a night in actually,” Remy sighed “but Bowsy and I’s schedules usually don’t match up and when they do, he feels guilty and wants to do something big and romantic and take me out. Plus, the kids get really rowdy and excited whenever they finally get to see the Danger Noodles again.”
“Ever think about doing a family night?” Patton suggested, stuffing a few cooking in his mouth.
“Gurl, have you seen the amount of kids we have?” Remy scoffed “How the hell are we gunna get them organized enough to pull that off?”
“I mean, you said they listen to Bowceit the best,” Roman replied, moving to Remy’s other foot “I’m sure he won’t mind lending a hand. He’d probably be all for this idea and do it in a heartbeat.”
“I know he would,” Remy sighed “but it’s just that ever since he’s stopped obsessing over you two, he’s finally been taking his royal duties seriously. He’s made good progress and he’s using his one free day today to babysit the kids so that I can hang with you guys. I really don’t want to distract him now that he’s got a good flow going on.”
“Trust us, he probably needs a day of to properly spend time with his kids and you.” Roman assured.
“I guess,” Remy hummed “what about you two though?”
“What about us?” Patton asked, now moving on to the fudge brownies.
“Think you can convince the Sarcastic Dorks to go out with you guys again?” Remy explained.
“Mmm, Virgil doesn’t really do ‘social’ activities much,” Roman admitted, a small drop of disappointment clear on his face “he’s very introverted and we usually do quiet dates like going on walks or spending time lazing inside.”
“Same with Logan,” Patton said glumly “we go on the occasional picnic for lunch sometimes near the meadows. But I’d really like for us to go on vacation, just for a day or two, maybe to the beach or to go hiking.”
“Then why don’t you?” Remy questioned “I mean, I’m sure the Talyns and Thomases could handling things around here for a couple of days.”
“We know,” Roman admitted begrudgingly “but I really don’t want to pressure my little storm cloud to do something he isn’t comfortable with. He’s already so wound up all the time I don’t want to force him into a social situation he doesn’t want.”
Patton nodded in agreement, “Logan always has trouble relaxing, he has to constantly be doing something or else he’ll get all fidgety. He can really get wrapped up in his own head.”
“Sound like the perfect reason for you guys to go on vacation,” Remy said, waving his coffee cup to emphasize his point “like, they’re used to being on the lookout for Bowceit to capture you, right? Well, now that that’s not happening…much anymore you need to get them to loosen up a bit.”
The princes thought a moment, their boyfriends did seem a bit more jittery then usual as of late. They’ve taking to joining the royal council and lending out their services to help out other kingdoms however ways they can. That and they were still the local plumbers in their home town which they still actively worked in. If they really thought about it their boyfriends had just as much, if not more, work to do as they did.
“I guess you’re right,” Patton hummed thoughtfully “but how in the world are we going to convince them to take a break?”
The three princes were quiet again, silently mauling over ideas that could potentially work to convince their boyfriends to take a vacation with them. They didn’t want to force them to do something they didn’t want to do, they wanted their lovers to come to their own conclusion. Though maybe they were a bit too dense for that, perhaps a little nudge in the right direction would be okay. A bit of persuasion, a bit of…seduction.
Remy smiled big and wide, the gears in his head working madly, “Gurls, I’ve got a plan.”
---
Logan had been informed by a flying messenger that he was to meet at Patton at his castle as soon as he got back. He had been planning to do so anyways, always eager to spend time with his love, but this time it was a bit more urgency. The message didn’t specify why which made Logan all the more worried but he couldn’t be sure it was something bad just like he couldn’t be sure it was something good too.
As soon as he busted into the castle, a bit frazzled and nervous, he was consoled by a Talyn and Thomas who assured him that the prince was fine, and just had a surprise picnic ready for them in the garden. Finally, able to calm down Logan was then escorted out back to the garden where he found his beloved waiting for him with a feast spread out under their favorite shady tree.
“Sorry it took so long, my sweet,” Logan apologized, settling himself down on the blanket “the Ice Kingdom was just a-a-a…”
Logan was finally able to get a good look at Patton and holy shit his brain short circuiting now. Patton was wearing a baggy blue sweater under a pink overall skirt that reached mid-thigh with a kitty face on the front, thigh high white socks with pink and blue paw prints decorating the edges, and pretty blue flats. His crown had been replaced by a garland of pink and blue sweet peas which matched the soft makeup highlighting his round face. You could barely tell that the prince was wearing any makeup at all, though his cheeks did look more rosy and his eyes more vibrant and his lips more pink and shiny.
“Logi?” Patton called out to him, head tilted like a curious puppy “Is everything okay?”
Patton had to play this right if he even had a slime chance at getting Logan to agree to go on vacation with him. He wasn’t the best at seduction like Roman or even Remy but he was cute and sweet, a much more dangerous asset to have. Patton wasn’t dumb, he was a diplomatic leader and sometimes talking things out wasn’t enough. Sometimes you had to bat your eyes and smile sweetly or tear up a bit and play the innocent victim to get what you want out of people. And at this point Patton wasn’t above doing all of that and more just to get Logan to take a break.
“F-fine!” Logan sputtered out “Everything’s fine, i-it’s just…you look nice.”
Bingo.
Patton’s smile was as bright as ever, “Aw, thank you Lo. Me and the boys had a spa day today and then Ro wanted to do makeovers. I didn’t want anything too extravagant, just something cute and casual to relax in with you.”
“Yes, of course,” Logan said, clearing his throat “sorry I couldn’t spend the day with you my love, the council seems to be busier than ever it seems.”
“It’s okay Logi,” Patton said sweetly, snuggling up against his boyfriend’s side “so long as you’re hear now that’s all that matters.”
Logan could only nod, the cuteness of his boyfriend being way too much for him at the moment. Not that Patton wasn’t always cute but the whole outfit he was wearing at the moment just kind of emphasized everything about him. Though maybe Patton was acting a bit more cuddly and playful then normal but it wasn’t like Logan was gunna complain about it.
Patton knew this all too well and was not afraid to exploit all of his boyfriend’s weaknesses to play him like a fiddle.
“Oh, actually, I have a surprise,” Patton said excitingly, reaching over to grab a certain plate “I made your favorite cake! Look, I even made it mini so it’s like you’re eating the whole thing, plus it makes it extra cute.”
Logan gave his boyfriend a fond smile, moving forward to kiss his forehead, “Thank you, love.”
Patton giggled, a sweater paw hiding his dopy smile and dark blush, “It’s no problem Lo, you’ve seem so stressed lately it’s the least I can do.”
“Yes, well, I have been a little busy,” Logan sighed “but I’m fine, just need to find a good rhythm to move along to.”
“Or maybe you could take a break,” Patton said innocently, grabbing a fork to cut into the cake and bringing the piece to Logan’s mouth “Say ah~”
Logan blushed a deep scarlet, swallowing thickly, but complied with his boyfriend’s wishes. He chewed as he continued to speak, “I can’t possibly do that Patton, there’s far too much work to be done.”
“I’m sure the Thomases and Talyns could handle themselves for a few days,” Patton assured, feeding his boyfriend another piece of cake “they’ve done so in the past long before you or Virgil came along. I mean sure, things have been a bit more organized now that you two are here but I’m pretty sure it won’t fall into chaos if you miss a day or two.”
“I know love,” Logan sighed tiredly “it’s just-”
“You have cake on your face.” Patton giggled, gesturing vaguely with his fork. There wasn’t really but Logan didn’t need to know that.
“Where?” Logan asked, rubbing at his cheek to remove the non-existing crumbs.
“Riiiight there!” Patton jump to give a quick peck to the corner of Logan’s mouth, sitting back down with a giggle and a mischievous smile. The prince admired the pink lipstick stain against his boyfriend’s skin that matched well with the pretty blush spreading across his cheeks.
“Uh…d-did you get it?” Logan stuttered out, knowing full well that there had been nothing on his face but what else could he say in a situation such as this.
Patton smiled that same mischievous smile, putting aside his plate and fork as he leaned forward and quietly murmured, “Not quite.”
He gave a gentle kiss to Logan’s lips but didn’t linger for long as he moved to kiss the other corner of his mouth, then his cheek and the tip of his nose and his forehead. Pretty soon Patton found himself straddled across his boyfriend’s lap smothering every inch of his face and neck with kisses, leaving a trail of lipstick stains in his wake. Sometimes he would linger a moment at a certain spot on Logan’s face or sometimes he’d give off a rapid-fire tail of kisses or sometimes he’d look to see where he hadn’t kissed Logan yet and make sure to leave his mark there. After a few minutes the prince pulled back to admire his work; Logan looked absolutely lovestruck, smiling like a fool and unknowing of Patton’s handy work on his face. Well, at least Patton thinks Logan doesn’t know if he did, he made no show of minding it at all.
“Hey Lo,” Patton purred, carefully cupping his boyfriend’s face so as not to smug his work before leaning forward to give him a long slow kiss.
“Hmm?” Logan hummed in response, much too drunk on affection to answer properly.
“I was wondering,” Patton smirked, trailing kisses under Logan’s chin “maybe you and I…” behind his ear “could go to the beach this weekend…” on his brow “maybe a bit longer…” over his collar bone “just for a couple days…” another long slow kiss, smiling as he finds Logan trailing after him “wouldn’t it be nice?”
“Mm-ha.” Logan sighed dreamily.
“Just you and me…” Patton cooed, gently pecking Logan’s lips over and over again “alone at a beach house, warm sun and cool water.” He pauses his affectionate assault on his boyfriend’s face so he could lean back and pout “But I mean, you’re really busy so I don’t know if we can.”
“Huh?” Logan’s happy love daze started to fade a bit as he took in his lover’s large brown puppy dog eyes. Logan had a hard time saying no to those eyes on a normal day but right now, so filled with love and affection and kisses it made him dizzy, Patton had him wrapped around his little finger.
“I don’t want to pull you away from important work,” Patton said bashfully “but I really wish we could go. We’re both so busy now and I miss you a lot.”
“I-I miss you too,” Logan finally stuttered out, it took a great deal of effort to say “but we have-”
“I know we both have important duties to attend too,” Patton cut in, batting his lashes “but wouldn’t it be okay just to take a little brake? Just a teeny tiny one? You won’t even notice we’re gone.”
Logan gulped, his resolve quickly dropping, he was a weak man in love with an adorable prince with large doe eyes and a cute pout how the hell do you expect him to act logically in this situation, damn it? “I-I, uh…”
“Please Logi Bear,” Patton purred, snuggling in close and giving Logan another slow, long kiss “for me?”
Logan truly was a weak man, he was also a tired man whose kind of been burying himself in extra work to compensate for all the pent-up energy he had in him due to the lack of Bowceit fights. Why was it so bad to go on a short vacation? He’s been wanting to spend some more time with Patton but he just kept adding more and more work onto his plate, thinking he could finish it all on time. It was ridiculous.
“I guess…a vacation sounds good.” Logan admitted softly.
Patton squealed in delight, lunging forward to tackle his boyfriend in a hug as he once more covered every inch of his face in kisses.
---
Virgil was having trouble breathing but not in a bad way, he thinks. When Logan had rushed off to Patton’s castle, he was a bit worried there could be danger a foot. Though Roman hadn’t sent word about so it could just be Logan blowing things out of proportion, which was kind of funny since it’s usually Virgil doing that. Still, his brother had been a bit more jumpy as of late and he along with him. Not that they weren’t grateful that Bowceit had now stopped trying to kidnap their boyfriends and force them into marriage it’s just when you become accustomed to something like that happening weekly your body has no idea what to do with all its wound-up energy once it stops.
So, maybe he and Logan were working a bit over time just to let out some of that pent-up energy. It gave them something to do and in turn let them help a lot of people. But it may have also unintentionally caused them to neglect their boyfriends and whenever they do get together one or both parties are just so tired, they have not effort to do anything let alone go out. It’s kind of been eating away at Virgil for a while now and he really did want to make it up to Roman some way but he was always too piled up with work so he kept pushing it back, swearing up and down he’d do it soon.
Unbeknownst to him it wasn’t soon enough for Roman.
Which is the cause of Virgil not being able to breath because when he walked into the thrown room, where it was said his boyfriend was waiting for him, he was met with a gorgeous sight. There Roman sat on his thrown reading a book, legs crossed and wearing a high waisted red skirt, an off the shoulder black and white long sleeve crop top, and black ankle heel boots. His hair was curled and done up in such a way that it framed the prince is face perfectly, making way for the sparkly hoop earrings he wore. His makeup was subtle save for the smoky red, black and gold eyeshadow and champagne red lipstick.
Roman casually looked up from his reading and smirked when he caught Virgil staring. Virgil squeaked and flushed a pretty pink, embarrassed at having been seen and quickly flipped up his hood to cover the majority of his face. Roman made a show of closing his book and setting it aside so that he could stretch his arms skyward, a sliver of skin peeking out as his shirt rose up. The purple clad plumber made it super obvious that he was trying not to stare, keeping his eyes firmly on the ground until he caught sight of Roman’s boots then up his legs and skirt and waist and he was staring again, damn it.
Roman chuckled teasingly, striking a dramatic pose, “You like? Patton, Remy and I decided to treat our self to a spa and makeover day.”
“Y-yeah, I see.” Virgil murmured, having found his shoes very interesting.
Roman’s shoulders drooped, a pout starting to form on his lips, “You don’t like it.”
“N-no, no, I do, I really do!” Virgil assured quickly, making the mistake of looking back up at Roman and now he couldn’t look away. “I-it’s just – I just – a-and you’re just…”
“I’m just?” Roman corked and eyebrow, desperately trying to suppress the giggle bubbling up in his chest.
“You…look…” Virgil gulped, fiddling with the sleeves of his hoodie “…g-gorgeous.”
“Aw, Verg,” Roman giggled, a warm blush spreading across his cheeks, it was always nice to hear praise on his looks, especially from Virgil who said it with such sincere honesty “can I get my hello hug and kiss now?”
“Um…” Virgil felt his face on fire as he nodded and shuffled over towards his prince is waiting arms. He briefly wondered if the heels Roman had on would make for an awkward hug given their height difference. Virgil was already short as it is and he still sometimes had to tip toe up to kiss Roman’s face, if the prince was feeling merciful that day, he might bend down to meet him.
But of course, that didn’t happen because as soon as Virgil was close enough Roman pulled him onto his lap and snuggled into his chest. Virgil squeaked in surprise, blush returning to his cheeks, but soon relaxed into the embrace, burying his face into the crook of Roman’s neck. It was nice, Virgil forgot how much he missed Roman’s over the top hugs. The prince always seemed to wrap around him like a blanket, occasionally swaying them back and forth to some unheard musical beat.
“I missed you.” Roman murmured softly, a hand running through Virgil’s hair to push back his hood.
“I missed you too.” Virgil hummed, cuddling closer into Roman’s warm embrace.
They held onto each other for a while, content to quietly bask in each other’s presents. They really hadn’t been able to spend any good quality time together like this. To truly unwind and relax together without worrying about work or responsibilities or Bowceit kidnapping them because he needs a babysitter.
Roman was the first to pull away but only briefly as he quickly returned to cup Virgil’s face and slot their mouths together in a long passionate kiss. Virgil yelped in surprise but soon melted into the kiss, firmly gripping onto his prince is broad shoulders. He missed this too, he missed everything about Roman but up until he met the prince, he had deprived himself of physical and emotional affection for so long. Roman spoiled him with love and praise and hugs and kisses and Virgil didn’t think much of it until he was suddenly left high and dry again because he couldn’t pull himself away from his work.
The kiss left Virgil’s heart full and his head foggy with sweetness and affection and Roman really enjoyed the blissed out look Virgil had as well as the crooked lipstick stain left on his mouth. Roman chuckled fondly as he moved to kiss his boyfriend again and again, traveling from his mouth to his cheeks to his nose, forehead, under his chin, neck, and any other place on his face that was free. All the while he lovingly whispered and cooed words of praise and love against his lover’s skin hoping that maybe they could engrave themselves into his soul.
“You work so hard my love…” Roman cooed, pressing a soft kiss under Virgil’s right eye “helping people every day…” his chin “you’re amazing…” the bridge of his nose “you’re wonderful.”
Virgil could only hum contently, all too willing to melt into a mushy puddle of blissed out affection for which Roman could do as he pleased. The prince was all too happy to continue showering his beloved in praise and kisses, Virgil hadn’t been this relaxed in a long while which only served to motivate Roman even more to push for a vacation.
“And because you’ve worked so hard…” Roman continued, returning to Virgil’s lips “helping the council get in order…” kiss “attending meeting after meeting…” kiss “I thought that maybe…” kiss “me and you could possibly…” kiss…kiss…kiss “take a vacation?” kiss “Just for a few days…” kiss “I have cozy little cabin…” kiss “near a ski lodge in Ice land…” kiss “what do you think?”
Virgil couldn’t answer right away since Roman decided to pull them into another slow, passionate filled kiss that made him wonder why he never thought about taking vacation with Roman before? Like, what was stopping him? Why did he have to think about this for so long when he could be using that time to be with Roman? It sounded like a wonderful idea.
“So?” Roman hummed, breathless after parting from their kiss.
Virgil gave him a dopy, foolish smile, eye lids droopy and heavy with bliss as he gazed lovingly at his boyfriend. He giggled breathlessly, “M’kay.”
“Really?” Roman exclaimed, half surprised Virgil caved so easily and half excited.
“Mmh.” Virgil hummed, leaning foreword to capture his lover’s lips in his once more. This time it was Roman who was caught off guard but he was quick to enthusiastically return the kiss, plus a few extra to show Virgil how happy he was.
---
Remy arrived at the familiar lava filled castle in record time, he didn’t want to leave Bowceit alone with the kids more then he had too. As he walked through the castle looking for his boyfriend and their kids he couldn’t help but smirk as he noticed the lingering stares and glances he was receiving from Bowciet’s minions. Remy couldn’t blame them though, he did look hot. He had on a white chloe crop top, black high waist shorts, a knitted cream-colored kimono that slipped off his shoulders and bunched up at his elbows, and cute flowery sandals. His was swooped back and pined with golden stary clips and matching dangly earrings. He didn’t do much with his make ups since he’d still be wearing his trade more circular shades but he opted for a natural summery look, warm browns and creams for eyeshadow. The only thing remotely eccentric was the icy blue lipstick delicately painted on his mouth.
He finally reached the play room where he found his Lumas along with the Danger Noodles napping together in a giant cuddle pile with pillows and blankets covering the floor. A few guards stood watch near the exits but there was no Bowceit in sight. It wasn’t uncommon for Bowceit to leave the kids in the care of the guards once they’ve settled down enough so he could take a quick break. But given his track record as of late Bowceit was more then likely working in his office.
“Remy?” The prince paused to look down and acknowledge a drowsy Junior slithering up to him “When’d you get back?”
“Just a little while ago, go back to sleep baby.” Remy whispered sweetly, running a gentle hand over the little snake’s scales.
“Why are you dressed up so pretty?” He asked with a yawn, stubborn much like his father.
“It’s a little surprise for your daddy,” Remy winked playfully “have you seen him?”
The little snake nodded tiredly, “Yeah, he said he was gunna finish up some boring royal business stuff. Are you two gunna go out on another grown up date?”
The slight hint of sadness in the little snake’s voice made Remy’s heart ach and he was certain that Bowceit felt the same way. Not that Remy and him didn’t enjoy their alone time but the Boopa King really has busy. The prince could see it in his eyes how much he missed his kids but he also missed Remy and since he’s never been in a proper relationship before Bowceit has no idea how to balance out his love life and his family life. Remy understood that and he wanted Bowceit to know that he understood that and was willing to adapt into a routine that benefits both their lives.
“Not exactly,” Remy replied “I was thinking maybe we could have a bit of a family game night, all of us together. What do you think?”
Junior wiggled excitedly, “Yeah, that sounds great! But…what if dad’s too busy?”
“You just leave that to me sweetie,” Remy smiled coyly, kissing the top of the little noodle’s head “go back to sleep doll, I’ll wake you when I come back, okay?”
After tugging the little noddle back into the warm cuddle pile Remy strutted his way down the castle hall, more determined then ever. He didn’t really put a lot of effort into many things in life, I mean, he is the cosmic prince of the universe he could just make things happen with a wave of his hand, but sometimes there were times that wasn’t enough and you needed to roll up your sleeves and get down and dirty. And in this context “down and dirty” meant seducing your giant lizard boyfriend to take a break and spend time with his family.
He burst into his boyfriend’s office unannounced, as always, with eccentric fanfare that would make Roman jealous. But of course, Bowceit was use to this by now so he didn’t bother to look up from the paperwork he was reading at his desk. Remy sighed, took a sip of his coffee, relaxed his shoulders, and lazily walked over walked over towards the Boopa King. He casually drapes himself over Bowceit’s shoulder scanning over the mountain of paper work overflowing the desk.
“Whatcha doing, hon?” Remy hummed.
“Just going over a few contracts and treaties,” Bowceit replied, scribbling down a few notes “the kids are all asleep in the play room if your wondering. How was your day?”
“It was nice,” Remy said, pressing his cheek against the back of Bowceit’s broad shoulder “we had a bit of a spa day, gossiped a bit, a few makeovers, it was fun. How ‘bout you? How were the kids?”
“The kids were fine,” Bowceit said distantly “although the Lumas wanted to play up in the rafters again so if you see a few of them covered in soot and cobwebs just know that’s what happened. I was planning on bathing them later after they woke up.”
“Mmh, if I knew they were gunna cause trouble like this I wouldn’t have left them here for you to stress over.” Remy said guiltily, rubbing over his boyfriend’s other shoulder with his hand. He felt the tense muscles under his fingers relax a bit and a soft content sigh slipping past his lover’s lips. That’s when Remy got an idea. Standing up straight and beginning to slowly massage over Bowceit’s shoulders, something casual and slow so as not to cause too much suspicion.
“It’s no trouble at all,” Bowceit assured, relaxing further under Remy’s dancing fingers “it’s not easy being prince of the universe and a father, I’d imagine you don’t get very many breaks. It’s the least I can do to help in some small way.”
“Aw, baby your so sweet to me,” Remy cooed, rotating his thumb into a particularly tense spot on Bowceit’s back, causing the lizard man in front of him to practically purr “but you know, you’re a ruler and a father a well. Don’t you think you deserve some time off too?”
“No, no, I couldn’t possibly,” Bowceit hummed, his voice started to slur and his movements became slower “I have way too much to do, having dedicated several years to chasing after Patton and Roman has put me behind on my royal duties. I’m barely just starting to catch up and I can’t start slacking off now.”
“I think you’ve caught up plenty,” Remy assured him “the kingdom won’t crumble if you take a day off. Plus, I miss you and your kids miss you too.”
At the mention of his children Bowceit became tense once again, guilt heavy at the pit of his stomach. He’d really had been neglecting spending proper time with his kids, but after turning over a whole new leaf he didn’t want his kids to see him as a prince obsessed, tyrannical ruler but as a responsible, confident leader. So, he got his shit together and finally started putting some work into running his kingdom properly. It had been a much bigger task then he had anticipated but that did not deter him from work hard and stabilizing his kingdom. He was afraid that if he stopped now, he’d slip back into his old habits.
“I miss you all as well,” Bowceit admitted “but I still have-”
“Oh, you still haven’t seen my new outfit!” Remy interrupted before Bowceit could even finish his sentence. He had to keep Bowceit’s mind off his work and doubts for Remy to even have a slight chance at convincing him. So, he quickly spun his boyfriend’s chair around to face him stepping back to slowly turn and show off his outfit. “You like?”
Bowceit’s cheeks dusted a light pink as he openly gawked at his beautiful boyfriend, “Y-yes, you look lovely.”
“I know,” Remy chuckled, taking a step closer toward Bowceit “it gets pretty warm here, what with the lava and junk, so I decided to go for a bit of a summer look. Though any place gets really warm with you around.”
Remy winked and Bowceit sputtered, “I – it, um…”
“What’s the matter Bowsy?” Remy chuckled, settling in-between Bowceit’s legs as he wrapped his arms around his boyfriend’s neck “Piranha plant got your tongue?”
“C-certainly not,” Bowceit cleared his throat, placing his hands firmly on Remy’s waist, they were so large they almost completely covered his entire torso “It’s just…sometimes it takes a while to find words to properly describe your beauty.”
Now it was Remy’s turn to blush but his smirk still remained, “That’s real cheesy babe.”
Sometimes Bowceit has a tendency to unintentionally say the sweetest things, unknowing as to how they effected Remy. Contrary to what most people think Remy wasn’t the most emotionally affectionate person in the relationship, physical affection was no big deal to him, he’s all for snuggles and kisses, but it was hard to truly let himself be vulnerable with someone. Bowceit has gone through enough turmoil in his life to just not have the effort to put up wall anymore. It was strange to have someone openly love you so fiercely but it slowly gave Remy the confidence he needed to open up, bit by bit.
“You love it when I’m cheesy.” Bowceit shot back, a soft smile on his face.
“I do, really.” Remy admitted, leaning forward to plant a soft kiss on his boyfriend’s lips.
Bowceit hummed, lips stained with ice blue and eyes closed contently, “Mmh, that’s nice…do it again.”
“What this?” Remy teased, giving his boyfriend another kiss, this one much slower and more passionate.
“Yeah, that, keep doing that.” Bowceit sighed dreamily.
“As you wish your majesty.” Remy chuckled, ducking down to kiss Bowceit once again, moving up towards his high cheek bones where scales met skin. The ice blue stains Remy left against his boyfriend’s skin contrasted greatly with his even tan and green scales but it still looked quiet lovely to the space prince. So, Remy continued, peppering kisses up Bowceit’s forehead, under his chin, around his neck, and where ever else he could reach on his face.
Bowceit was now fully purring, a deep rumbling vibrating against his chest as he pulled his lover closer towards him. You’d think living in deep space would make Remy cold to the touch but it’s because he lives day to day alongside a bunch of literal stars that he practically radiates warmth. Being that Bowceit is part reptile he enjoys this immensely, always looking for an excuse to cuddle or kiss his boyfriend, it was like having your own personal furnace. A burning ember sitting in his lap, tracing sparks of warmth across his face.
“But in all seriousness, you really should take a break,” Remy murmured, rubbing his thumb over a particularly sensitive patch of scales on Bowceit’s neck “we don’t even need to go out, we could have a nice night in with the kids.”
Remy placed a gentle kiss over both of Bowceit’s eyelids, “A nice nap, maybe a few boardgames and snacks, we could have a sleep over in the living room. What do you think?”
“That sounds nice…” Bowceit purred, though Remy sensed there was a “but” coming in and he snubbed it out immediately.
“I talked to Junior earlier,” Remy whispered against his boyfriend’s mouth “he and the Boopalings seem to really miss you and when I asked if they wanted to have a family night, he got so excited. He’s probably already woken up the others and told them and I don’t want to have to be the one to break their little hearts that I couldn’t keep my word.”
Bowceit whined a bit, the thought of his children in any kind of distress because of him did not settle well with his stomach. But he still had so much to do…but then again, Remy had already promised the kids they would. It would be bad if a prince had to go back on his promise and Bowceit did turn a new leaf and wanted to set a good example for his kids. How completely un-kingly of him to skip out on plans that have already been arranged, he honestly had no choice really. The kingdom would just have to function without him for a day or two…maybe three.
“I mean…” Bowceit shifted in his seat, pulling Remy closer still as the prince continued to pepper kisses over his face “you did already make arrangements, so it’s to be expected of us to attend.”
“Of course,” Remy smirked, playing along with his boyfriend’s train of thought “it be inappropriate of us not to.”
“Plus, I’ve gotten most of my work sorted,” Bowceit hummed, guiding Remy’s lips towards his “the kingdom can function without me for a day or two.”
“Mmh, maybe three?” Remy asked hopefully, might as well push for more now that he has Bowceit so complacent.
“Why not?” Bowceit smiled, gazing lovingly at his lover’s sparkling eyes “But…maybe I need a little bit more convincing.”
Remy chuckled as he leaned forward to embrace his lover once more, slow, passionate, and warm.
---
The sun was warm against Logan’s skin, as for the rough, glittery sand underneath him. The birds chirped over head and the waves crashed in beautiful melodic harmony, pushing and pulling grains of sand and sea shells. He heard Patton call his name as well as the careful but quick paced footsteps trailing behind him, crunching down on the sand.
He turned to his beloved, smile still brighter then the sun shining down on them, as he sat down beside Logan and handed him a fruity tropical drink. A typical coconut cup with a fruit skewer, tiny umbrella, and swirly straw, it was definitely delicious.
Patton hummed in delight as he downed half his drink, “So good!”
“Isn’t that your third one?” Logan teased, lazily sipping his drink.
“But they’re so delicious,” Patton pouted, a pink blush blooming over his cheeks “plus we’re on vacation, I get to enjoy myself without anyone judging me, thank you very much.”
“Of course, love,” Logan chuckled “just don’t complain when your bladder’s full and you need to go all the way back to the beach to use the bathroom.”
Patton stuck his tongue out in an adorably childish manner, “Meanie!”
Logan laughed, leaning forward to kiss his boyfriend’s nose whose face scrunched up like a cute bunny rabbit. Patton giggled as he leaned up to returned the gesture and of course Logan just had to give him another kiss back as did Patton and so on and so forth. Their drinks were soon forgotten as they happily lounged against the sand sharing sweet kisses.
---
Virgil watched the snow outside fall like dancing jewels as he wrapped the thick quilt blanket more tightly around him. He was sitting on a wide reading nook in the living room of the cabin with a large stone fire place taking center stage of it all. It crackled and roared with scorching embers, covering the house in a cloudy, cozy warmth that kept out the bitter cold of the outside.
The blanket’s shifted beside him and Virgil turned to find Roman, clad in wool socks and sweats, snuggling up against him as he handed Virgil a cup of hot coco with tiny marshmallows. Virgil silently hummed his thanks as he helped Roman readjust the blankets around them, once more cocooning them both in gentle warmth.
The purple clad plumber took a careful sip of his drink and moaned in delight, “This is great, Ro.”
“Only the best for my little storm cloud,” Roman said sweetly, attending to his own drink “I borrowed the recipe from Patton before we left as well as a few others. I was thinking of trying out a bit of apple cider later on, what do you think?”
“I don’t know,” Virgil pondered playfully “hot chocolate and marshmallows are a snowy vacation staple, how can it ever be topped?”
“I’m guessing that you’ve never had Patton’s famous apple cider,” Roman said haughtily “though I can’t say for certain that it tops his hot chocolate but it does go great with apple pie.”
“You’re trying to make me fat, aren’t you?” Virgil chuckled.
“We’re on vacation, darling, no one’s gunna mind,” Roman teased, leaning over to kiss his boyfriend’s cheek “that’ll just make you more tempting to cuddle.”
“You’re a jerk.” Virgil laughed, turning to kiss his prince’s lips.
---
“Do you have any fours?” Bowceit asked.
Everyone was gathered in the living room, dressed in their pajamas and surrounded by piles of blankets, pillows, and stuffed animals. Remy, Bowceit, and a few of the Danger Noodles and Lumas sat around the coffee table playing go-fish while the rest that couldn’t fit crowded around them to either watch or help out their favorite.
“Nope, go-fish daddy!” Wendy giggled.
“Oof, you might be on a losing streak today, babe.” Remy chuckled, snuggling close to his boyfriend and petting over the Luma sitting on his lap shuffling through his cards.
Bowceit frowned, bringing his cards closer to his face, allowing Junior, who was draped over his father’s neck to looked over them. The Boopa King turned towards his son expectantly, “What do we got son?”
“Mmh, I think Remy’s right dad,” Junior said grimly “but it’s to be expected, Wendy is a total viper.”
“Of course, I’m a viper dumb-dumb!” Wendy scoffed.
“Dad! Wendy called me a dumb-dumb!” Junior whined.
“Wendy, be nice to your brother.” Bowceit scolded gently, though he was desperately trying to suppress a fond smile threatening to break through.
“She is going to grow up to have a smart mouth when she’d older.” Remy tutted playfully.
“Well, she doesn’t exactly have the best influence.” Bowceit smirked with a raised eyebrow.
“Babe!” Remy gasped dramatically, a hand to his chest “How could you! I am a delight!”
The Boopa King rolled his eyes fondly at the space prince, leaning close to whisper, “Of forgive me my prince, how can I ever make it up to you?”
“Mmh, I can think of a few ways.” Remy purred as he leaned up to place a sweet kiss on his boyfriend’s lips. A chorus of groans and “ew!” filled the room causing both men to burst out into pearls of laughter. They kissed again out of spite.
#thomas sanders#sanders sides#logicality#prinxiety#remceit#logan sanders#patton sanders#roman sanders#virgil sanders#remy sanders#sleep sanders#deciet sanders#bowceit#mario au#ss mario au#fluff#so much fluff#sander sides fanfiction
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21 Questions Tag Game
tagged by...no one, I just wanna do this heh
RULES: answer 21 questions, then tag 21 people you want to get to know better.
Nickname: Em/Emmy
Zodiac: Sagittarius sun, Pisces moon, and Aquarius rising (i think)
Height: 5′8″ :)
Last thing searched: brownie camera history, I’m in Intro to Photography :))
Favourite musician(s): Hayley Kiyoko, Halsey, King Princess, girl in red, mxmtoon, Chloe Moriondo, Abbey Glover, Peachy!, Cavetown, Alec Benjamin, Hailee Steinfeld, Lizzo, those are just a few :)
If you had a time machine, would you go back to the past or visit the future: Probably the past cause I’m scared of what the future holds oof
Do you get asks?: nope lol
Following: a lot lol
Would you rather be rich or famous: hella rich
Amount of sleep?: 4-5 on weekdays, 10-12 on weekends
What I’m wearing: t-shirt and joggers
Dream Job: Therapist or Animal Rehabilitation officer
Dream Trip: Ireland, Spain, or Greece!
If you were an animal, what would you be?: house cat, definitely
What are some of your favorite:
BOOKS - Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, Asking For It, Wings of Fire
FILMS - Both recent IT movies, more recent Steel Magnolias, all of Tyler Perry’s movies
SHOWS - Every DC and Marvel show, The Dragon Prince, She-Ra and the Princesses of Power
GAMES - The Sims lol
Play any instrument?: used to play violin and guitar, but am very bad
Language(s): English and enough Spanish to carry on a convo
Describe your aesthetic: bisexual aesthetic mixed with top energy, vintage soft gurl, warm cloudy days, sunflower fields
i tag @delta-simmer , @fadinggarden , and @rileyvanbusted
if you’ve already done this, just ignore this :)
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I love this & it reminds me of my Breakup Cake story.
Ok, so when ya gurl gets angry, overwhelmed, or upset she turns on her 'Everyone Can Get Fucked With a Cactus' playlist & bakes.
Now, I'm not talking about let's grab a box of brownie mix at the store level baking. I'm talking everything from scratch baking.
My dad often reflects on a time when he came over & I was in the kitchen. In the dining room leading to my kitchen was 2 dozen cupcakes in different flavors decorated for the gods, 2 pans of brownies (one with chocolate chunks, one with chocolate chunks & course ground espresso beans), &, the reason I'd called him to come by, 4 pound cakes (2 regular, 1 chocolate swirl, 1 lemon with an icing drizzle). He tentatively stepped into the kitchen, where I was making the second batch of cookies (each of which produced about 2 dozen cookies) & quietly, gently said, "Hey [name]. You, uh, you doing ok? Is something wrong?"
So with this insight into one of my coping methods let's begin the story of The Breakup Cake.
I'm a person who is very secure & open with who I am. I started dating a dude & from the jump let him know that if he was looking to have a family, he was barking up the wrong tree because I had one child, didn't want to raise more, & was sterilized because having the one nearly cost my life. We date for 9 months.
Then one day he sits me down & says "Hey so it's been 9 months, so I feel like it's time to decide if I'm in it for the long haul or not. I want a family, so I don't think this is going to work."
I looked him in the face and in a voice of terrifying calm said, "Man I was upfront from day ONE that the family gig wasn't an option with me. Why in the fuck did you waste my time?"
This dumbfuck's response? "Oh I thought your sterilization wasn't permanent & that I could change your mind."
"So what I'm hearing from you is that you straight up didn't listen to what I said and thought that as a man you could just magically make me want more children? Are you like legally mentally impaired in some way or just a disgusting misogynist who thinks that women don't know what they really want? You know what, don't answer that. Get the fuck out of my house, don't ever contact me, and if you see me out somewhere, turn around & go the opposite fucking direction because it's taking all my will power to not punch you in such a way that a family won't be an option for you."
He still tried to speak, but The Spawn (10 yrs at the time) came in & said "Since you apparently don't listen, let me tell you in a way you'll understand. Leave. Now. Or she will 100% make sure your nuts rupture. Go. Now."
He left & The Spawn looked at me. "Need baking supplies?" she asked, knowingly. Absolutely.
I baked a 2 tiered cake from scratch. Chocolate cake, a gelled coconut filling, & coconut vanilla buttercream frosting. Then I decorated it. In a gel icing I made, I piped on a drawing of a uterus with anime eyes & a frown, with text that was above & below: "Sorry my uterus & your ears are broken."
Then I put it into a cake box, drove it to his house, & left it with his roommate.
An hour later I get a call. It is the newly ex boyfriend & boy is he mad. He's asking what the fuck my problem is & why I'm such an asshole. His roommate is in the background cackling like someone on the Joker's laughing gas from Tim Burton's Batman (1989). I asked what the problem is. He dumped me & I baked him a beautiful cake from scratch. I don't see how he could possibly be angry, as I don't know many women who would do such a thing. In the background the roommate yells "[Name]! This cake is fucking amazing! You're an amazingly talented baker & I may need your services for a party!" Ex tells him to shut the fuck up. I tell him to give roommate my number, then delete it from his own phone because we are done here, and hung up.
Don't worry, I made a smaller version with leftover supplies as I went for The Spawn & I to enjoy, just without the decor/message.
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I was tagged by my gurl @marsilainen to choose some pictures from my phone to describe myself so here we go.
(I’m not sure how many pictures it was supposed to be but since 9 seems to be the standard..)
1. I love our family doggo Osku. He’s a 1-year-old mini dachshund, soft, and loves to cuddle.
2. I also love our other doggo Hilla. She’s 4 I think, a strong bebe and also loves to cuddle!
3. Summer is my favourite season.
4. My favourite book is Le Petit Prince and I own three different copies of it: one in Finnish I got for Christmas from my godparents when I was 9, one in English that I bought from a second hand store in the city I live and studied in, and this one in Spanish I bought from a street vendor in Madrid last April.
5. I love to bake! Here’s a chocolaty gooseberry pie in the making. It was damn delicious.
6. I play tennis (badly).
7. My favourite meal is the dessert. Here’s a cheesecake with a brownie base + other yummy stuff I had in a restaurant in Madrid after a dinner (hence the dim lighting).
8. I graduated with a master’s degree from uni last spring. I majored in English (although it’s hard to believe if you’ve ever read my writing in English) and minored in Spanish and pedagogical studies, i.e. I’m a language teacher. In this picture I’m using the literal paper document of my MA degree as a mouse mat in my first post-graduation job.
9. I’m kraftböck (and Michi) trash, lol.
I tag @percervall @euphoria-heartbreak @emmanette and @fialu , do it if you want to and/or have the time! <3
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