#i take back every negative thing i’ve ever said about rain code. god this game was good

[clickbeetle]

GENOCIDE JACK REFERENCE. GENOCODE JACK REFERENCE.

[kakiokuru]

NOBORIZAKA: NOVEMBER RAIN

Chapter Eleven | Unrequited Feelings

It’d have taken a miracle. For Reika, she trained as hard as her tiny body possibly could. Under Nanami’s intense training regiment, not a single second was wasted, not a moment’s rest was allowed, and especially not a fraction of energy was used for anything but focus. Yet, after all the blood, sweat, and tears put in, the reality was, she was marching to her death with Kazumi in tow. The training she was under was less than gentle, working until the group was scolded to leave by the school’s custodial staff. All in all, Reika was lucky that she missed one punch from a very reluctant Yumi, even luckier with the hits that did connect since they were light and gentle to any normal person. Reika had the bruises to show for it too.

“Ahh, I always feel ready for anything after a good, long meal! Thanks for the food Reika!” Kazumi patted her stomach with an overzealous grin. “I bet everyone else will be jealous they didn’t come along! Having gourmet food from a person with your type of budget was amazing!” Kazumi stretched her arms out, thoroughly pleased by the day thus far. Having a well-earned lunch the day after a hard day’s training was the ideal way to go into a big event in her eyes. “The meat will really keep you energized for your fight! Proteins are everything!” Kazumin then proceeded to list the beneficial nutrients and vitamins of the food they just had. It was the one thing that she strived in.

Reika smiled meekly, clutching her tablet. She thought having lunch beforehand may give her stamina, or perhaps make Kazumi happy enough to leap into her position. But the further along they went, the more of her spirit left her body. She felt her heart beating uncomfortably and her gaze was hard to raise from the ground. She was genuinely afraid, all of the confidence and drive just… died as soon as she woke up today. But Yumi said she believed in her so she had to do this. She had to make her proud somehow, hoping that there was some underlying chance that Yumi would look her way. And if that meant being destroyed by a girl who was named for a low class athletic activity then so be it.

“Ah yeah, the fight.” Reika pressed her index finger against the side of her head from habit. Normally glasses would be adjusted this way, but today she had to wear contacts. There were definitely no Maeda-like triggers to be had with her, besides her glasses were expensive. “We should probably have a code, for when you need to step in.” Reika nodded once as she leaned towards Kazumi. “Like a safe word, or as wrestlers would put it; a ‘tag in.’”

“Tag in?” Kazumi tilted her head.

“It’s when one person switches to another fighter during the fight. Sometimes they clap hands or say a certain word.”

“Heh?! I'm only here for when you can’t fight anymore… There's no need, I’ll be there when you can't get up.”

“Wouldn’t it be more reasonable to do it when I need it rather than when I’m already defeated?”

“Maiyan’s plan is to come in after, not during.”

Reika sighed, staring down at the concrete underneath her loafers. “There really isn't a way around this, is there? I'm going to die today.”

Kazumin then gave the president a hearty pat on the back. “Oh, don’t say it like that! No yankee has ever died from a challenge! Naachan told me so. Yankees just take really long naps, like Waka!”

Reika paused in her tracks, darting her attention at the bigger girl. Was she serious? She knew Kazumi wasn’t the smartest but there were no way she was that oblivious. She had to be playing some kind of mind game or wasn’t taking her seriously. “Th-that’s not right at all! My records clearly show that there have been at least one yankee related death from a little over five years ago, during Maeda’s time!” Reika stared at her in firm shock, adamant to disprove the tank. “Nishino-san must be lying to you and a very unreliable source of information if she says things like that because that is blatantly false.”

Her brow visibly twitched. “Naachan isn't a liar.”

“In this case, yes she is a liar. I'm sure this isn’t her first dishonest act towards you.” Reika spat back at her, a little bit more spiteful than she had intended. Surely, Kazumi couldn’t be this naive. “A good friend wouldn’t make a dangerous lie like that.” Reika spoke with her thoughts aloud, even uttering her personal biases that she’d usually keep to herself. This time pertaining to her dislike of the particular girl in question. “Although, Nishino-san isn’t really a good anything if I'm honest…”

That struck a nerve. Kazumi stopped in her tracks with a firm crunch of the thin veil of snow, crossing her arms over her coat in a huff with a large frown painted on her lips. “Naachan is a great friend, I’ve known her since we were in preschool. If she wants to tell me things to spare my feelings then that means she's an even better friend!!” Kazumi practically shouted at the schoolmate in her already naturally booming voice. “Do you think I’m stupid that I really wouldn’t know people could die?! Going through life spouting negative feelings and dark facts will only make you sad, so shut up! You don’t know anything!”

Reika scrunched her face in discomfort upon realizing what she had said and to whom. Nanase was Kazumi’s best friend and therefore would no way would share the same distaste for the former. She wouldn’t even know the president’s situation or why she would have a single reason to dislike Nanase, no one should but Yumi at this point. There was no way her words could be justified–

“You���re only talking smack about Naachan because Waka liked her more back then… That’s unfair! You’re mean!”

Reika’s eyes nearly fell out of her head, snapping wide in disbelief. Her mouth fell open as she could only stammer in the shocking realization. No way… No way Kazumi could have known. No one should have known about her affections for the yankee. No one was meant to know and she couldn’t have been obvious. They were feelings she buried within her so just how? Reika wouldn’t even record it in her personal records, a thing that included even excruciating detail in every other account. From illnesses, to baby photos. But nothing ever on Reika’s sexuality.

“How did you… I-I think you’re confused, Kazumin.” Reika raised her hands in an attempt to feign ignorance. “Something like that would be idiotic to get angry over, besides I’m not–”

“I’m not smart but I’m not stupid. Just because I don’t get high marks on tests doesn’t mean I’m blind! I notice things!! You’re the real idiot here!” Kazumi puffed her cheeks, actually shouting. “Go alone, I didn’t want to fight anyways!!” In a robust huff, Kazumi stomped off in the wrong direction, choosing to go the convenience store route over the path home.

Reika was alone on a Majijo school path.

Rather than fear, she was filled with remorse, regretting over the words she used in a topic that was more personal she was too late to realize. Kazumi didn’t get angry often or easily, but Nanase was her best friend, would kill and die for her. Reika knew that and she still crossed the line. She should have stayed quiet. Being intelligent was a blessing and a curse, more often than not unable to understand social cues and was careless in the way she handled emotions that weren’t her own. Now she had to pay for her mistake, everything was on her completely. There was no running from this.

Walking the trail while fighting her cold feet, Reika kept her head high. By now, the yankees recognized the white top and dark plaid skirt, what school the timid president represented, and why she was here. Fighting up to the gate meant nothing, so no one touched her. In fact, because of the broken knee incident from a few days prior, they backed away and cleared a path for her up until the front doors. The prissy girls are the ones to look for, and Reika was definitely one of the more sophisticated ones among them. They didn’t want to risk it. However, looking into her eyes all you could see was screaming. The knowledge that she could possibly end their teams noble struggle with one fatal misstep weighed heavily on her shoulder. God, she was really doing this.

Reika bit back her hesitation and strode into the school while mustering up some sort of aura of confidence. Once inside, the smell once more hit her like a brick wall. This time it was the overly spicy kick of hot pot broth wafting through the air and into her nose from a classroom as she walked down the hall. She still couldn’t believe the school allowed a gas burner in the middle of a class, even a Japanese charcoal grill for that matter. But the girls who would crowd around the boiling pot quickly made sure to spread news Reika was there, earning her a small audience at her heels. They quickly made sure Reika knew what they were thinking, cursed and slurred, bash and intimidate, anything to make her lose her nerve. All that bounced off her supposed tough skin as she kept herself grounded with Yumi’s pep talk. The girl of her affections was counting on her.

Sooner than later, she let the crowd subtly direct her to the bottom of the stairs. There was no way she could climb them. It was something no one should do unless it was to take on the top, unless they wanted to be beaten down that is. With all the ruckus, one would simply assume Yoga would know and head down. That didn’t stop the Noborizaka president from calling out in a firm voice.

“Iriyama Anna, I’ve come to fight for Noborizaka’s name.”

Loud clacking against the tiled stairs sounded her end. From around the corner, a girl with the most sleek and orderly hair, wearing a purple rayon sukajan appeared with a calm but dark aura around her. Her piercing eyes honed in on the prefect, giving her a hateful and unamused glare. The students behind her all moved two paces back for every step Yoga took, gripping the walls out of fear and respect. Her cold, uncaring eyes scanned the crowd in disapproval. The day had only just started and the atmosphere was already been tainted with malevolent energy sourced from the small fry about.

“The air here is bad.” Yoga stopped mere inches from the class president, gazing around the corridor before meeting her eyes. “Follow.” Was said clearly, before the elder girl glided around her and down the hall to the right.

“A-Ah, yes ma’am.” Reika nodded a couple times, her hand coming up to adjust the missing glasses out of nervous habit and hugging her tablet to her chest as she hurried to follow along.

Three rights, a couple long halls, and a cut through the back courtyard. Reika was given a very generous tour of their derelict excuse of a school. From it, she gauged there were absolutely no teachers, just loose girls doing as they pleased until the school said they could graduate. She had to wonder what merit there was in attending a place like this. What was so appealing about being a yankee and graduating with no education? Reika would never understand.

It seemed like Yoga couldn’t find ‘good air’ until the two were in the gym storage closet. The door shutting behind Reika’s back was the heaviest sound she had heard in a long while, earning a small jolt of fear from her. This gym appeared similar to the one in Noborizaka but the stark difference of cleanliness and overall inventory left an impression. These girls couldn't even have proper equipment for recreational activity. That or they've been stolen or used for unintended purposes. Either way, Yoga deemed this place to have ‘good air’ so Reika has no more than a few minutes to say her prayers.

“You know, I hate dirty things.”

Reika perked up, bringing her attention off of her nerves and to her rival. She did know that, had records saying so. It was why Reika decided to take extra care in her presentation.

Yoga slid her jacket off, neatly hanging it on a hook against the wall. “Dirty faces, dirty clothes, dirty language.” Listing as she turned, she pressed her fists into her hands, cracking her knuckles against her gloved palm. “But you, you’re different.”

Reika felt her uneasy feelings grow with each pop of her opponent's joints, her heart beating loudly in her ears. She had spoken for school assemblies, reported to high position parents and faculty, but nothing gave her nerves like this. “I-I understand.” She quickly emptied her pockets, carefully placing her precious tablet next to her possessions by the door, tying her hair into a neat ponytail with the thin scrunchie on her wrist.

“You understand nothing. You aren’t a yankee.” Yoga raised her hands, pressing them together in front of her chest and prayer position, her signature fighting stance. “You’re barely a fighter. Your aura bears no trace of hostile nature at all and yet you stand before me. You aren't fighting for anyone’s sake. You’re only trying to save face in front of your friends and classmates.”

Reika’s eyes widened slightly in surprise. “That’s not–”

“It is, isn’t it? One look at you and I can clearly see that you aren’t a match for even the lowest weeds in Majijo. This is a wasted effort. A waste of everyone’s time.”

“You’re wrong!!” Reika balled her fists, raising them. For once she could feel a small frustration burn inside of her.

“Am I now?” Yoga narrowed her eyes.

“There is someone.” All she could think of was that hand against her head, that warm smile that gave her hope and told her how she was believed in. They tried so hard to prepare her for this moment. She couldn’t let them down. She couldn’t let Yumi down. “There is someone that I’m fighting for.” Her fists clenched deeper into her palm as she felt a wave of emotional adrenaline well up inside her. “Wakatsuki-san is counting on me… she said she believed in me! So, come at me with all you have! I won’t lose!”

Reika took a deep breath, lunging forward towards the Queen. Her fist flew into empty air, her eyes crashing closed the second she moved and unable to realize that the other girl was already a step ahead of her. It earned her a sharp palm against the chest and then an elbow to the spine, sending her directly onto the floor. With the wind knocked out of her, Reika curled into herself as she experienced true physical pain for the first time.

“Fighting for someone’s sake isn’t enough.” Yoga stared down with uncaring eyes.

The Noborizaka president was pitiful, coughing and trying to steady her breath again. One move and she already looked done. She could completely tell that Yoga didn’t even use her full force with that hit, only trying to incapacitate her. Was she not worth it? Was she that weak? Either way, how did she really expect to win?

No, no more negative thoughts. Reika wasn’t finished yet, she could endure the pain. This was nothing compared to the near three years of heartbreak. She had to fight back. At least hold out and land one hit. Something to take pride in. With a loud groan, she peeled herself off the dusty floor, holding her chest and gasped out. “I can’t lose, I won’t! She’s relying on me so I refuse to go down like this!”

Another lunge, another sloppy swing. Yoga didn’t need to do anything more than take a step to the right and slap opponent’s back firmly with her palm, sending the girl into the wall with a loud thud. However, as she watched her rival hang off the wall, her words resonated with her, struck a familiar chord that Yoga understood too well. She let out a soft sigh, lowering her hands. This girl was just like her. Pining for the approval of someone who would never pay her even a glance. The need and want to be part of the life of the person she admired so fondly. She pitied Reika, because she was just as Yoga was.

“Give up. That girl isn’t going to want you even if you miraculously beat me. Like I said, a waste of your time.“ Locking eyes with her opponent, she saw a clear reflection of herself behind those deep brown eyes. She liked someone she had no chance with. “Have some self-respect and fight for yourself. Not for someone who might not even pay you special mind after this. At least that way, you have a reason to go on.”

“You’re wrong…” Reika glared at her, moving off the wall. The long-haired girl was basically telling her to give up on her love. Her love is what got her to this point, it’s what drove her to want to change. After everything she had to endure, how could she simply let go? “If there’s even a sliver of a chance, I won’t give up.”

Yoga mentally rolled her eyes. She had to admire her drive but she was so… stubborn. She wouldn’t listen to logic so easily, despite her intelligence. Maybe she did have some yankee in her. Still, Yoga couldn’t help but feel empathy towards the girl she spoke to. However, she was still a challenger. Yoga strode over to her, striking her across the cheek with her swift palm and throwing her on the floor once more with ease. “Take this is advice from someone who experienced a similar situation…” Yoga offered her hand down to the pitiful class president. “Fighting because someone is relying on you will mean nothing even if you win. There is no merit, no drive. No reward if your feelings are unrequited. In the end, you’ll just be disappointed. Save yourself from that and you will be better off.”

Reika looked up at her, taking in her words. Was she saying that she and her were the same? That seemed quite impossible for a bold yankee. Yet, there was clarity in her fighting advice and held truth. “I don't have a single drive to fight if it's not for her…” Reika wiped the blood from her lip, pulling herself up without the extended hand. “For the first time, Wakatsuki-san noticed me seriously when I was chosen to fight.” With simply remembering it, Reika felt her face grow warm as a lump of frustration grew in her throat. “She finally left that no good delinquent. She looked so pained all day until she smiled at me and told me ‘It'll be okay’ and ‘I believe in you.’” Reika felt her eyes begin to water as the frustration began well up and take over her. In a small burst of anger, her fist slammed against the wall with a resounding thud. “Why won't she notice me?! I don’t care if I’m a rebound or whatever!!” Reika’s voice cracked and echoed off the dusty walls, reverberating her emotions with emphasis. “But this… this was the only way… I hate fighting… I hate Nishino! I know how impossible this is but I can’t fail here! I don't want to disappoint her, I can’t!!”

Yoga watched the girl unravel, lowering her gaze for a moment. She understood her frustrations, even if she didn't know the girl formally. She understood them probably better than anyone her enemy came across in her daily life. The desperation of seeing the one you care about not pay you any mind, the painful knowledge of the one you loved was taken by another by someone better, the torturous fear of letting them down, and the soul-crushing rejection when you did. It was the worst, most unhealthy place to put yourself but because you cared, you wanted them happy. Though she could never hate her superior who was like a mother to her. Yoga couldn't live like that that anymore or else she would have ended up like Reika.

Letting a soft sigh out, she pulled a lavender handkerchief from her skirt pocket, offering it to her. “Here.”

Reika looked up with tears streaming down her now red, puffy cheeks, confused by the gesture. Nevertheless, she accepted the cloth, wiping her eyes and cheeks with it. “Thank you…”

Heels clicked against the tile as she paced back to hangers. “Like I said, I hate dirty faces.” Quietly, Yoga retrieved her jacket from the wall and slipped her arms through the sleeves. “Reality is harsh and unforgiving. But living for anyone but yourself will only end in pain. I learned that the hard way when Salt-san told me I shouldn't have bothered fighting Sakura and then being comforted by Otabe.” Yoga flicked her hair out from under her jacket, rubbing her neck with her gloved hand. “Blaming another girl or doing things you hate to look good for a person who won't love you is shameless. One day you'll find a girl who'll look at you and believe in you without needing you to change. It may take a while, and she could be someone you don't expect, but be patient.” There was nothing but sincerity in her voice as she crossed her arms. “But you're smart, You should know that already.”

She was right. All of her words. Reika curled her lips in, feeling her anger melt away with logic replacing it. If she thought back, it really was no one but her own fault things turned out this way. Hating Nanase for doing what she couldn't, having what she couldn't. It wasn't right. She wasn’t even sure if she truly hated Nanase anymore or if it was only pure envy “You're right. I should apologize to Nishino-san… Though, she wouldn't want to hear from me even if I did apologize, would she…” Reika couldn't meet her eye as she spoke, gripping the handkerchief to her chest. “You really think so? Thank you… You know, you're not what I thought you would be.”

“What? A big, angry yankee who is nothing more than a pair of fists?”

“Not at all!” Well, sort of. “I thought the Queens were these great pillars of strength, come strong and not care for talking. Or just be flat…”

The Majijo Queen exhaled, “Normally, I wouldn't care, but you remind me of myself. Whether you take my words or not is up to you. In any case, seeing as brought emotions to a fight and didn’t strike back, this was my victory.” Yoga noted the girls appearance, bruises forming on any exposed skin and a emotional breakdown, the result was obvious.

“You’re wrong!!”

With that loud bellowing but familiar voice, Reika snapped her attention to the door while Yoga turned her head, dropping her hands with an irritated look.

The door slid open with a resounding black and in the doorframe was an idiot, rice grains stuck to her face and an angry pout on her lips. Kazumi in all her food-loving glory. She took one glance at her school president’s bloody lip and her cheeks puffed up in hatred. Fire grew in her eyes, her fists balling at her sides. “You hurt Reika!” Kazumi growled out as she extended her hand with an accusatory finger pointed at the Queen. “I'm going to ‘tag in’! Reika, don’t worry, I'll protect you!!”

“Tag… in?” Yoga furrowed her brow, tilting it to the side with mild disgust. This girl was exactly the thing she hated, from the mess on her cheeks to the yellow smudge– was that a mustard stain on her uniform? The very presence of the tall female was offensive to each of Yoga’s senses. Like Bakamono, she was too dumb to even realize she was shouting at the top of her lungs instead of talking like a regular person. A pest, a noisy one. “Who are you?”

“I'm going to punish you for hurting my friend! Just one, ah, second…” Kazumi patted her skirt pockets, tugging the contents out and scurrying to load them into Reika’s palms. Two lukewarm curry buns, a handful of assorted treats, and a slew of colourful candy wrappers. With a small smile, she raised her hand to the bloody class president. “Reika, watch my stuff okay? We can share afterwards!”

“A-Ahh–… okay?”

Yoga was thoroughly confused. Was she trying to take over the fight? Win for her? Not unheard of but definitely not taken well. For the sake of a team, yankees would throw themselves at anything. But this girl– Yoga didn’t even want to touch her let alone fight. God, this girl was disgusting to be around, probably sticky too. Ugh. She put her hands up in a fighting stance once more. “I’ll make this quick then.”

Raising one finger, she dropped her idiotic grin, replacing it with a scowl and disapproving frown. “I said one second, I'm not ready yet.” Kazumi slowly and carefully used her fingers to brush back the mess of her hair, pulling it up into a neat ponytail with the hair tie around her wrist. “I know, it's my fault I'm late. Reika wasn't suppose to get this hurt. You really went too far, lady.” The idiotic girl’s tone lowered and steadied into a serious intensity as she rolled her sleeves up to her elbows. “I’m late because I was really angry, I ran off on my own and let this happen. And now I forgot why and came back. Then I heard Reika say sorry and remembered.” Kazumi patted Reika’s shoulder before stepping away to face her opponent. “So thanks for that. We’ll talk later, okay?”

“Kazumin…”

With an uncharacteristic smirk, Kazumi faced the elder Majijo girl with her fists raised. “Being beaten by you was a good punishment for her. But I won't let you lay another finger on in her without walking away without a scratch. You still haven’t really won yet. It’s my turn.” Her eyes narrowed into a strong and piercing glare. “You’ll pay.”

Yoga stepped back in surprise. Her aura, her demeanour, her speech, her eyes, everything was different. Dark, powerful, familiar. The same as the legends of a past student who was infamous in Majijo. Was this girl, who still had rice clinging to her cheeks, really a match for her?

Suddenly, without any warning, Kazumi jolted forward, swinging her leg towards the girl's head. A direct hit, Kazumi’s brown leather loafers impacted itself into Yoga’s cheek with enough force to send her into a pile of floor mats and hurdles. Yoga cried out in pain as gripping her cheeks while blood spilled from her lips, but there wasn't a second to recover. Kazumi was ruthless, instantly grabbing her by the hair, slamming her head into the wheeled blackboard against the wall beside them, once, twice, and a third time.

Reika watched in horror as her idiot companion, straddled the opponent after, dropping fist after fist. Was this really what Kazumi was capable, unbridled strength that looked as if it could even scare Yumi? If she was this strong, why did she stop? This was a completely new side that Reika had no knowledge or record of. And it was… strangely appealing.

The horrible onslaught of punches wouldn't let up. Blood pooled out of her victim’s mouth and nose, making a splatter mess with each attack but Kazumi didn't care. Yoga attempted to grab the girl's wrists, but it didn't help. Kazumi saw her attempts and rose to her feet, giving her a swift kick to the side the second she tried to get up. “Don't try it.” Kazumi looked down with a cold glare, watching her groan in pain and sweat with fatigue. “I win.” The tall smirked again, wiping the tiny splash of blood from her cheeks with her thumb.

Kazumi straightened out, staring down at the now unconscious girl before tugging out the black tie from her hair. Turning on her heels, suddenly that familiar idiotic smile appeared as if she had no worry in the world, like she didn’t just beat someone into a bloody pulp. Kazumi raised her fists with triumphant glee, bouncing in place with her eyes beaming with pride. “I win! Reika, did you see? Did you!” Her voice heightened as she shouted with excitement while she rushed over to the beaten class president with her hand extended. “Let's go home! Before the buns get cold!”

After Kazumi stuffed her pockets with the snacks she had her friend hold, Reika took the hand extended to her, more lost than ever. Suddenly she had a million questions floating around her head, unable to grasp one to ask. Kazumi was known to be strong, incredibly so. Except, she had a heart of gold and was known as a newly proclaimed pacifist. Although, Reika didn’t know why. No one did, well, with the exception being Nishino Nanase. If the reason why was because of the attitude she had just displayed , that didn’t make too much sense, even from a yankee perspective. She needed to ask. She wasn’t even sure how to bring it up.

Kazumi may not look it but she was just as complicated and complex it seemed. Her own person with her views, thoughts, and reasons. As she said before, she’s not stupid, only slow. Even right now, she seemed just as distracted by her own thoughts. Understandable. Kazumi pushed the heavy metal door open, holding it open for the school president to exit. “What are you waiting around for? Come on!”

“Ah! Nothing, sorry.” Reika cleared her throat, quickly gathering her tablet and smaller objects and  hugging them to her close to her body as she walked to the door. Hesitantly, she glanced over her shoulder to see the Majijo Queen defeated body among the bloodstained mats and felt a knot in her stomach. Fighting was definitely not for her. With Kazumin’s lead, they both managed to building exhausted but victorious.

Kazumi stretched one arm over the other to relieve her joints with a satisfied sigh as the two walked along the river bank. “Now that we won, we should go get a nice, big congratulatory meal! I’m thinking grilled meat! What about you?”

Reika looked up at her. “Kazumin… What was that…?”

“Uh, grilled meat? You know the one where you cook yourself on a table grill and tongs and–”

“You were… completely different…” Reika shook her head, trying to expand on what she thought she saw in easier terms for Kazumi. She wanted to know the reason for the completely change in character and the easy revert back to how she is now. “What I saw… it was a different person, in fact. Is this why you stopped fighting?”

She paused. “Ah, that?” Kazumi unwrapped one of her candies from her pocket, popping the sweet treat into her mouth. She swished the candy around her cheeks, crossing her arms. “Sort of. Naachan calls it my ‘youth drama mode.’ It’s cool name isn’t it?” That stupid smile appeared just as quickly as it faded. Her hand came up as she rubbed her neck in thought, her cheek puffing out. “It’s super dangerous… It’s actually how Naachan and I became friends.”

“Is it really?” Reika tried to read her face, to see any details she kept locked away.

Kazumi was a mystery to her. Someone so open and dopey, yet, so secretive and serious behind the face she put up. An open book yet closed, to be judged purely by what’s on the cover, a childish drawing of herself. Reika only knew of the synopsis of her book. A yankee girl who wanted to turn her life around and studied hard for a better future alongside with her best friend. A cliche story at best, but Reika finally realized she never truly understood the full novel. Honestly, with the front Kazumin put up, she never really felt like asking.

“Kazumin, if you don’t mind me asking… May I know why you became a pacifist?”

Kazumi shifted the hard candy around in her mouth, looking down at her with an unsure purse of her lips. “Mm… It’s a really long story though, and really boring…”

“It’s a long walk back, I don't mind–”

“Ahh!! Fine, you pulled it out of me.” Kazumi threw her hands up in a dramatic fashion. She spit the candy out into the snow with a sigh, clearing her throat as her hands fell on her hips. Reika recoiled in surprise, grimacing at the careless and bold act from her teammate.

Kazumi tapped her chin, pursing her lips. “I guess I should start from the beginning…”

Reika scrambled to pull the tablet from her skirt, diligently tapping away at the screen to get the details coming towards her. “Go ahead, I’m ready.”

“Mm, in elementary school, Naachan and I were really good friends. Well, mostly because she was getting bullied a lot, you know? When she moved here for the first time, kid’s called her a lot of mean things so she tried to stand up for herself. But she was really weak, so she got hurt a lot in fights.” Kazumi took a deep sigh as she spoke, trying to remember the important details from so long ago. She never had the best memory, but for Nanase, she tried. “I had to defend her because I was bigger than most of the kids. That’s how we became best friends, even until now!” Her smile grew at the memories, but quickly faded. “But then, you know, Naachan got strong too… And she became a yankee. Where we went to school and grew up wasn’t the nicest area so I guess I saw it coming… Of course I had to follow her. I didn’t want Naachan to get hurt. I made it my mission to make sure she never got hurt!” Nodding firmly, Kazumi tapped Reika’s tablet, adding in a bunch of random letters to her log. “That was our entire middle school life. Naachan and I were a great team. Make sure you put that down!”

“Ah, yeah, of course!” The school president quickly deleted the extra characters.

“Okay, so back to the story… Naachan’s special. She is super fast! Yankee kids soon realized that people couldn’t hit her unless she let them. I was the strongest so to make sure she stayed safe in the end, I did most of the fighting while she distracted whoever was our opponent.” Kazumi loosely punched the air, kicking snow as they walked. “But Naachan is super careless, especially back then. And really mean to her opponents! There was a girl this one time, she had a knife and she tried to stab Naachan…” Kazumi raised her hand, imitating a small stabbing action from memory. “I snapped. All I could see was red, and that girl ended up in the hospital for a real long time. Her friends too, apparently Naachan had to pull me off with all she had. And even when she did that, I struck her too.” Kazumi lowered her voice, rubbing her bicep where faint scars hid underneath her sleeve. “I have a couple scars from that day too. Girls called me a monster, unstoppable. Stronger than Waka is, when I lose control that is. Though I’ve never seen Waka lose control so I’m not too sure one that. Could be equal… Hm…”

Reika looked at her in surprise, lowering her tablet. “Kazumi… I’m sorry…” It must have hurt having to remember something like that. “If it's too much you don't have too keep going–”

“No, no! It's okay! The good part is afterwards! Naachan patched me up and realized she was good at something!” Kazumi waved her hands slightly. “It’s why she came to Noborizaka!” Kazumi grinned at her, seemingly burying her unhappy memories and replacing them with happy ones. “Because I took the stab wound, Naachan decided to be a nurse when she graduated! Well, sort of. She won't admit it to anyone– Don't put that down! It's a secret!” Kazumi reached over, quickly hitting the back button on the tablet haphazardly, erasing parts that weren’t supposed to be erased.

“Hey– Hey! I'm sorry, I’ll fix it.” Reika scrunched her brown, pulling the tablet back and re-entering the missing bits.

“Anyways! When she did get here, she sort of relapsed into bad habits when she started dating Waka… But she still has her goal at heart! I know it!!” Kazumi spoke with pride, shoving her hands in her pocket. “But, after that fight, the one where I put people in the hospital, I was really broken up honestly. I didn't let anyone know about it and it affected me for a while. Depression and all. I know, hard to believe now. Scared to touch people, watched my anger, careful of my surroundings. All that not-so fun stuff. MaiMai was the one who told me about pacifism, said I didn’t have to fight if I didn’t want to. Violence is a choice.” She nodded a couple times, looking at Reika. “Really shined a light on everything.”

“Sounds like MaiMai.” Reika smiled in return.

“You didn’t meet me when I first started going here. But MaiMai was the first friend I made in my first year. She helped me a lot with my depression! I’m always grateful for that! MaiMai showed me that optimism is a great thing to have, and that focusing on the things that have gone wrong and dwelling on the past doesn't help anyone if you aren't looking towards the future.” Kazumi kept her smile as her hand landed on Reika’s shoulder. “By looking at the bright side, facing the future gets easier. Life is already hard as it is, but that doesn’t mean it has to be bad. The little joys matter. And that's the lesson I’m passing to you.”

Reika looked at her in thought. “Kazumin… You really aren’t as stupid as you put off.” Not an insult, and Kazumi didn’t take it that way. Instead, she smiled even brighter at the class president, hugging her arm. Reika couldn’t help but laugh softly, placing her hand on Kazumi’s. “Thank you, really.”

“Little joys matter so that means food! Can we eat now? I’m starving! Grilled meat is a little pricy, but you’re super rich! I’ll pay you back later!!”

“No worries, it’s my treat.”

To be continued…

[funkypanda]

I'm not THAT evil but you SHOULD do every uneven number and every even number. c:

So what you’re saying is, you’re just as evil as I thought you were.

1: Full name

Alvin Wong. I don’t have a middle name.

2: Age

24. Turning 25 on September 29th

3: 3 Fears

Heights. Loneliness. Creepy crawlies.

4: 3 things I love

Video games. Music. Learning.

5: 4 turns on

Neck kisses. Making out. Intelligence. Cute butt.

6: 4 turns off

Ignorance. Bad breath? IDK there’s a few.

7: My best friend

Skylar Lu. Big ol Asian dude.

8: Sexual orientation

Straight.

9: My best first date

I don’t think I’ve had a good one.

10: How tall am I

6′ or 6′1″

11: What do I miss

Physical affection.

12: What time were I born

I think it was at like 9:30 PM

13: Favourite color

Purple!

14: Do I have a crush

HARDCORE HOLY SHIT

15: Favourite quote

“Knowledge is power. Guard it wisely.” or “An open mind is like a fortress, with its gates unbarred and unguarded.”

16: Favourite place

Taipei, Taiwan.

17: Favourite food

Vietnamese cuisine in general.

18: Do I use sarcasm

What do you think?

19: What am I listening to right now

Tired by Alan Walker

20: First thing I notice in new person

Their eyes. Always.

21: Shoe size

Men’s 12

22: Eye color

Dark brown

23: Hair color

Black/dark brown

24: Favourite style of clothing

My style of weird punk rock skater.

25: Ever done a prank call?

Yes a few times.

27: Meaning behind my URL

I was called panda back in high school a lot and I played the sax.

28: Favourite movie

Rogue One.

29: Favourite song

I’ve been obsessed with Down by Marian HIll lately.

30: Favourite band

A Day to Remember.

31: How I feel right now

Really satisfied.

32: Someone I love

My old LoL friends.

33: My current relationship status

Single but hopefully not soon?

34: My relationship with my parents

We’re not super close but we’re family still

35: Favourite holiday

Christmas when I have someone cute to spend it with.

36: Tattoos and piercing i have

None unfortunately.

37: Tattoos and piercing i want

SO MANY TATTOOS. Razer’s 3-headed snake. Colonel Mustang’s transmutation circle. Al’s blood seal. etc etc

38: The reason I joined Tumblr

I... I don’t remember.

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other?

I mean. I hate her guts. 

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?

Not really but I love them.

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?

Not yet. But I’m planning on it.

42: When did I last hold hands?

Uhhhhh its been a few months I think.

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?

Way too long.

44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days?

Nah I love my hairy man legs.

45: Where am I right now?

In bed at home.

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?

Probably Jamie. But she’s also gonna be drunk with me lmao

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level?

Loud. I’m a punk.

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad?

Yep. But its a necessity.

49: Am I excited for anything?

Most things. As long as I’m interested in it.

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to?

Yeah I do.

51: How often do I wear a fake smile?

Almost every day.

52: When was the last time I hugged someone?

Earlier tonight.

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me?

I mean more power to her.

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?

Not that I know of.

55: What is something I disliked about today?

I didn’t really do anything.

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

Adam Savage from Mythbusters. He seems so genuine.

57: What do I think about most?

The unknown of the universe.

58: What’s my strangest talent?

Jumping to conclusions with little to no information.

59: Do I have any strange phobias?

Not strange.

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

As a photographer, behind.

61: What was the last lie I told?

I’m okay.

62: Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online? 

I guess on the phone. I don’t like my face.

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

No to ghosts. Yes to aliens.

64: Do I believe in magic?

Not really.

65: Do I believe in luck?

Absolutely.

66: What’s the weather like right now?

Its like 70 degrees and humid.

67: What was the last book I’ve read?

Actually I just reread The Martian.

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline?

Not especially? I’m indifferent.

69: Do I have any nicknames?

Not really.

70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had?

Hip and lower back from sleeping on the floor.

71: Do I spend money or save it?

GOD I SPEND SO MUCH MONEY.

72: Can I touch my nose with a tongue?

Nope!

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me?

Does kitty cat toe beans count?

74: Favourite animal?

Otters I think.

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM?

Talking to a cutie.

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is?

Natas

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it?

In Too Deep by Sum 41

78: How can you win my heart?

Be nerdy with me.

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone?

S C R E M

80: What is my favorite word?

Hullo?

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr

@miidoriilol​ @mama-hellscream​ @pearlmaiden​ @crowfeather-queen​ @funkypanda​

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?

Can ya’ll just... Get along?

83: Do I have any relatives in jail?

Negative.

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power?

The power to control luck and probability.

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

Do you want to finish school?

86: What is my current desktop picture?

100 Thieves logo.

87: Had sex?

Oh yes.

88: Bought condoms?

Most definitely.

89: Gotten pregnant?

Negative.

90: Failed a class?

Yup.

91: Kissed a boy?

I have not. 

92: Kissed a girl?

Multiple. At different times.

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain?

No but its a cliche I’d love to experience.

94: Had job?

A couple

95: Left the house without my wallet?

Multiple occasions.

96: Bullied someone on the internet?

No cuz bullies are shit.

97: Had sex in public?

Yep once.

98: Played on a sports team?

Nope not really.

99: Smoked weed?

Yep.

100: Did drugs?

Not really.

101: Smoked cigarettes?

I’ve tried it. I hate it.

102: Drank alcohol?

Oh yeah

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan?

Nope.

104: Been overweight?

All the time.

105: Been underweight?

Never.

106: Been to a wedding?

 Two I think.

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight?

On multiple occasions.

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight?

LOTS OF TIMES.

109: Been outside my home country?

More times than I can count.

110: Gotten my heart broken?

Yup.

111: Been to a professional sports game? 

A few. They’re always fun.

112: Broken a bone?

Never.

113: Cut myself?

Uhhh a few times.

114: Been to prom?

Yup and it sucked.

115: Been in airplane?

I love traveling.

116: Fly by helicopter?

Never but I’d love to.

117: What concerts have I been to?

ADTR, Blink-182, Sum 41, Green Day, and a few others.

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex?

Not really into it.

119: Learned another language?

Learned Mandarin as a young child.

120: Wore make up?

Nope but I’m not against it.

121: Lost my virginity before I was 18?

Nope I lost it at 20

122: Had oral sex?

Yes

123: Dyed my hair?

Never tried.

124: Voted in a presidential election?

Yup. I voted for Obama and Hillary.

125: Rode in an ambulance?

Yup

126: Had a surgery?

Never.

127: Met someone famous?

YEP BUT I DIDN’T KNOW AT THE TIME.

128: Stalked someone on a social network?

A little bit.

129: Peed outside?

Yeah a few times lol

130: Been fishing?

With my grandpa a bunch of times.

131: Helped with charity?

Yeah! And honestly it does feel great.

132: Been rejected by a crush?

Multiple times.

133: Broken a mirror?

Yeah its surprisingly satisfying.

134: What do I want for birthday?

THE FUCKING ADIDAS DRAGONBALL Z SNEAKER COLLAB COLLECTION.

135: How many kids do I want and what will be their names?

Probably none.

136: Was I named after anyone?

Nope.

137: Do I like my handwriting?

Not even a little

138: What was my favourite toy as a child?

I had a megazord that I loved to play with.

139: Favourite Tv Show?

Right now? My Hero Academia.

140: Where do I want to live when older?

Taipei, Taiwan

141: Play any musical instrument?

Yup! I played the sax.

142: One of my scars, how did I get it?

Self harm.

143: Favourite pizza topping?

Mushrooms.

144: Am I afraid of the dark?

Kind of? not really.

145: Am I afraid of heights?

Oh yeah.

146: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad?

LMAO all the fucking time

147: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?

Uhhhhh story of my life?

148: What I’m really bad at

Lots of things. Focusing. 

149: What my greatest achievements are

Learning coding and ethical hacking.

150: The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me

“I don’t love you anymore” “I’m glad your grandpa is dead so he wouldn’t have to see how disappointing you are.”

151: What I’d do if I won in a lottery

Pay off all of my parent’s debt and save the rest.

152: What do I like about myself

I’m actually really sweet and cute.

153: My closest Tumblr friend

@pearlmaiden

154: Something I fantasize about

Being successful.

155: Any question you’d like?

@pearlmaiden you didn’t ask me a question