#i swear i have wips that aren't that those are just the most recent ones that have actually made it past the planning phase

[hesgomorrah]

🌹🌹

:3

for every "🌹" received in my inbox i'll post one random sentence of a random WIP i'm currently writing

from pass the cheap merlot (here's to who you know):

Trapper's eyes flashed dangerously, and Gonzo had to hide a grin behind his glass. He really was predictable.

[badscientist]

Writeblr Interview Tag

tagged by @sableglass. thanks! im breakin out the proper syntax for this one.

Short stories, novels, or poems?

No idea. I haven't explored writing enough to know what I prefer. As a teen, I wrote a lot of poetry due to the affliction of Being A Teenager and drug-related conflict between my parents. Then as I got older, I wrote mostly scenes for bigger ideas. Dead Meat just happened to turn from a dream into a planned three-parter with six total characters (Betsy, Sanderson, Clive, Ankhanum, Betsy's mom, Eleanor), but as you can see, that didn't quite work out.

What genre do you prefer reading?

Overwhelmingly horror. A sprinkling of fantasy here and there. More recently I've been into non-fiction. I have a few exceptions to my I Don't Read Fanfiction clause as well.

Are you a planner or a write as I go kind of person?

The first five or so parts of Dead Meat were written by the seat of my pants. I did eventually sit down and outline the remainder of it. Even now, the final part isn't even fully drafted, but it'll get there.

What music do you listen to while writing?

Instrumentals. Videogame soundtracks are great for this. Big fan of writing to Silent Hill music.

Favorite books/movies?

For films, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, The Iron Giant, The Thing. …I absolutely love more movies than this, I swear, my brain just feels like fudge right now and unless I have a convenient list of my favorite things to refer to, I can't recall them. Same thing applies to books. I was a big Stephen King fan back in the day, less so as I've gotten older, but I don't think I'll ever be able to rid myself of the brainworms The Langoliers, The Dark Half, Tommyknockers and Firestarter gave me. I read them at formative times in my life and they'll always be nostalgic for that reason.

Any current WIPs?

Dead Meat. I have some other ideas I'd like to get to, but right now I'm trying to focus on that.

If someone were to make a cartoon out of you what would your standard outfit be?

I depict 'OC Jacquin' in sweaters and coats a lot but the reality is I'm usually in a polo shirt or button-up and slacks, or boxers and tank tops. But those aren't as stylish and I have to look superficially cultured. (He also has long hair! My hair's very short IRL.)

Create a character description of yourself:

…Gonzo from The Muppets.

Do you like incorporating actual people you know into your writing?

You'd be hard-pressed to find anyone who doesn't at least subconsciously write and incorporate traits people they know or have met or have seen into their work. So the answer's yes. Though the funniest example is my QPP Cinna, because they're a main character of a project to come.

Are you kill happy with your characters?

No. I get too attached. And then I'd feel sad about killing a person that isn't real. (Sweeps Ankhanum's murderous tendencies under a rug.) Don't look at that.

Coffee or Tea while writing?

Water. I usually only drink coffee and tea when I first wake up.

Slow or fast writer?

Varies. Depends on how my brain's doing on a particular day. Feels like it's being cooked like an egg or in molasses and then it's slow going.

Where/who/what do you draw inspiration from?

It all boils down to a love of horror and biology. I like two things. Don't look at me.

If you were in a fantasy world, what would you be?

Ideally, Ankhanum. He's the coolest thing TO be in my work. But realistically, I'm just Jacquin. While he's a flavor of Ankhanum, he's also just some Guy (butch) with a body horror gimmick.

Most fav book cliche & least favorite cliche:

Combining these two because I really just do not read enough books to know. I'll give anything earnest a shake, even if it's not something I'm normally into.

Favorite scene to write?

They're tricky, but I get a thrill writing fight scenes. I'll actually paste a bit of the one I had the most fun with early on:

Suddenly, Betsy was in total darkness. She stopped in place and hung her head, trying to reorient herself. The generator didn't kick back on. She pulled the flashlight free from her belt. Though it'd make her a beacon in the night, its weight in her hand was a comfort.

Betsy reached the mudroom.

There. The door to the yard.

She ran for it. It burst open from outside the moment she put her hands on it, shoving her backwards. The weight of her bag was too much; she pinwheeled her arms and fell back onto it. The flashlight dropped from her hand, striking the ground. Betsy scrambled to get back up, grabbing for the light. Something lashed and knocked it further away. She was struck and knocked forward. She twisted herself around and rolled over to the flashlight.

Sanderson's pupil shrank as she shined the light on him. He stood between her and the way out, tail whipping behind him. His nostrils were flaring, not taking his eye off her.

"Doc. Get out of my way," she said.

Reason for writing?

Sanderson lunged. Betsy swung her flashlight at what was left of his head. His jaw grew, splitting open, catching the flashlight in his teeth. A few of them cracked from the force of him locking onto it. Chatting was officially off the table. Betsy strained against him. He growled around the light. She slammed her other arm up against his throat, pushing him back. The mouth on his stomach snapped at her.

There is a wall between myself and others that has always existed and this is a Manifestation of Othering the Neurodivergent (a mean kid is better at diagnosing mental illness than a psychiatrist, and even though this was 20-30 years ago, it Sticks), so writing is. A ladder. I can at least sit on my wall and wave to people.

[dhyanshiva]

Announcement

Posted and Pinned: 07.11.2023

Hi, so the short of it is that I will not be writing from February of 2024. This naturally means that by extension I will not be posting anything after 02.2024.

I will be uploading a standalone something on 20.11.23 and the final installment of 'the pool' series by the end of January. At most.

Note: I will not be clearing out my AO3 or disowning any existing works. The profile will remain on the platform as it is.

I will remain on socials, though, all platforms (to DM, serious post and shitpost as per usual). Yet to get used to discord because I haven't used it often but yeah.

Further explanation of this decision sits under the cut if you want to know more beyond this. It's a tad lengthy than is necessary but... whatever.

Going cold turkey is arguably worse. I think.

(I have tried to keep a rein on my... descriptions. Apologies if I have offended anyone, I did not mean to in the least)

CW// some swearing and overall negativity tbf

Right, so. After finally wrapping up a long term commitment on 30.10.23, I decided to give this decision, the finalisation of this announcement some time, aware that I could be thinking in haste or in some sort of reverb from all that. I have, however, been contemplating wiping my AO3 for a long while, so this has stemmed in some ways from that consideration.

Again, this will not be happening because the pieces on there are markers for me and apparently a source of escape for others. Some older pieces still get interacted with, which, while it mystifies me, is not my place to judge or question that.

The reasoning

Ok so no more faffing about.

Simply put, I'm in a lot of pain, have been for a long while. Longer than I wanted to admit to myself, even.

Work - Expression recently has been dominated by S1 of Cla$$ (Netflix India, 2023). Self evident. However, there's a range of storylines and plots that I have completely ignored - sidelined, disregarded, call it what you will - and remained... fixated on a select few. Chief of those being the highly subjective experience of grief and loss.

Yes, the running thread and temporal back and forth is rooted in the "investigation" of the central character's murder but let's be honest here.

Like... is it really that deep or had I leapt of the deep end preemptively?

Looking over at my AO3 now fills me with a strange sense of revulsion and incredulity. Apart from "Rise", I honestly cannot claim to have exercised or demonstrated any creativity. Nor has any catharsis that I so desperately hoped to 'achieve' been... achieved.

(Even in Rise itself, the graphic descriptions have no grounds - I ask myself more so now, how necessary was all that? Was it respectful, was it justified? The answer to these three, in my eyes is no.) I could've taken an implicit route but.. didn't.

So all of this, to what end? Just constantly relentlessly mixing canon with extrapolated and distorted amounts of pain. Some of it being my own. My perception of the reality of canon was unfortunately completely skewed by my own state of mind and carrying that forward, to me, was unacceptable beyond a certain point. Which I believe I have long since crossed.

The aforementioned October - end commitment has depleted me, had been leeching from me the whole while and has left me spent. I don't have energy for normalcy let alone the absurdity that is my "creativity".

The pieces I've written for my eyes only are also just... what the fuck. Truly some wild stuff. I have many issues, scattered liberally across these documents.

And all the ideas I have for existing WIPs sit on one hell of a spectrum. Some of my plotlines and dialogue ideas terrify and horrify even me - and trust me, my angst and pain threshold is unusually high. I cannot, with whatever conscience I have left, dig my claws into characters that aren't my intellectual property, nor can I inflict such harm on the characters that are mine and THEN put all that out into the world.

Nope. I'm quite the miserable and depressed cunt, frankly, but that's my problem, it doesn't have to be anyone else's.

I don't have it in me to continue writing for any media or for myself. I cannot imagine, envision, I cannot plan, I cannot create. I can't and am apprehensive to express myself with this medium because the extent of the abyss is unknown even to me and that is unacceptable. To me.

Until I can begin to heal from some long-standing things, I cannot hope. I cannot infuse a requisite and consistent amount of optimism, joy, love, peace in my writing.

Nothing that sustains, only demands, demands and destroys.

Unfortunately, I am not that talented to write from a separate space. Not in the least.

I can project till kingdom come, but consistently pummeling a narrative with unbridled agony is something I have no right to do. And the output you see is still highly filtered; no I don't ask you to imagine the starting point of it all. Highly unpleasant and triggering, to say the least.

I have to be healthier first for myself and then for my craft. And that's a long, long, non - linear and arduous journey.

Right, so, given that language and communication is something I rely heavily on, it's not that the ideas won't keep jostling about in my mind, but I won't put pen to paper, finger to keyboard for them.

I have experienced long bouts of writer's block and this is most definitely not that, by the way.

I do not have the capacity to find new media, God forbid my infliction on them too (so best avoided for the greater good).

Round off

(status updates as of date of posting: 07.11.23)

Ok so if this has made a modicum of sense (I'm just rawdogging this in the drafts, I can't touch my Notes app or GDOCs), I am going to confirm that of my existing ones, only "the pool" will get its... closure. Or whatever the fuck you'll call what is going down in P3. Sorry. In advance but also generally for the series.

[I mean let's be for fucking real here okay? I can't do, well * gestures * all that, INCLUDING ripping out the staircase scene for an important pair of characters' 'closure' and not at least attempt to justify all of it, I don't think]

DOS, though planned in its entirety will not be completed and its summary will be altered to indicate this.

The LIF series too, will only have two pieces and its completion status will be changed to 'yes' - it has these characters outlined, their respective docs buried:

The rest of the Manzoor family

Dhruv

Veer

Sharan

Suhani

Neeraj

Yep. That's about it. Nothing more, nothing less. If you wanted a rough idea on how any of these was going to traspire, feel free to DM me. Any and all queries will be addressed.

This announcement post will be linked to my 20.11.23 and Jan - mid / end upload and to my AO3 profile itself.

My Spotify Profile:

Conclusion

This is about it, at least without turning this into some even longer vent and woe betide me "fuck my life" rant when there are far far worse things happening around us. Also without being too transparent and TMI because... well duh.

Still, fairly long, I know. And I'm sorry for the same.

Last but most certainly not least,

Thank you for reading this, any of my work, and a sincere, specific thank you again - always indebted - to (you know exactly who you are) the wonderful people I've had the distinct honour of being introduced to via my writing endeavours.

Much love,

Dhyan x

P.S. what do you know, I've written this whole thing in English, no Hindi, Kannada or the unexpected German! I can in fact write in only English, just decided to be a nuisance in my pieces!

[If this ever changes, it will be unpinned accordingly x]

[sinister-faye]

Gamedev Blog #1: Playstation 1 aesthetics and the unreal engine. + Game tease

Unreal engine 5 has been pushing the limits of real-time rendering. But some of us, myself included, have gone WAY back to rendering chunky, blocky PS1(PSX) styled graphics.

The tip of this spear is the Gorgeous Goth Goddess @b0tster with their twofold Bloodborne PSX and Bloodborne Kart projects respectively.

The reasons we choose the style are simple. Firstly those of us who are leaning hard on this aesthetic were in our formative years during the fifth console generation, so we have fond memories of playing games that look CHUNKY. And secondly, perhaps most importantly, it is the easiest (kinda) 3D content pipeline to do as a solo developer.

No need to bake meshes, no polygon budget, no texture streaming budget, Installs that won't even approach 100 gigs(let alone 10g), and guaranteed 60fps is a minimum. Low poly art style has a lot going for it.

-Getting the style

The Unreal engine 5 does have to be modified a little bit. Since it has features that were not even dreamed of in 1998 set as default, We actually have to use a shader to emulate the lower fidelity colors, resolution, and lighting effects. Starting the project means turning off things like: anti aliasing, motion blur, HDR lighting, ETC.

My current post processing effect.

Since most people aren't playing on old Sony CRT tv's and have modern 16:9 monitors, we have to just divide the HELL out of the resolution and color space. This shader (shown above) is very adjustable, and is just the first step on the PSX-esque look.

The next step is modeling and texturing. I'm used to 3d modeling in high resolution, so I had to learn to think like a 90's developer and get as much detail as I can squeeze out of as little polygons as possible.

A WIP of a character in my upcoming project

High polycounts give artists the freedom to make their characters as realistic as possible, BUT making them look exactly right, and more importantly animate in a way that looks real is hard to pull off. Low poly models require much more precise and EXACT modeling and texturing, but allows for a more artistic interpretation of how characters look and move. The human eye is more forgiving of caricatures of people.

Another popular effect for most PSX throwback games is the model "jitter" where models would not place vertices in their EXACT location on the screen(check out the video above!). So it looked like the character was shaky until the camera got right next to the character, to save on memory. I am currently debating using this effect in my game.

The game

So the game I'm working on is: Codename Cardboard Box. (the title is pending some stuff)

As you can probably surmise from the codename it is a metal gear solid homage. I will be taking the Tactical Espionage Action gameplay, and long stylized cutscenes of the serries and putting my own spin on it.

I have been playing through the whole serries recently(again lol), and have noticed so many Queer pieces of subtext than I did as a teen. But it seems like there was a heavy censoring hand on the story creators to push that aside, for example in MGS 2 there was cut dialogue in the script where Otacon would have mistakenly called Snake "David". Implying a much more familiar relationship. MGS4 showcased a lot more "for the male gaze" designs, and camera angles. (I swear to god Naomi's boobs have more screentime than Meryl in total) and the whole serries seemed to have every woman who talked reinforce gender stereotypes, or was just a non stop flirting machine for snake to banter with. The only one who sort of escaped this fate was Emma Emmerich, but even then there were a few lines that made my eyes roll.

Originally I thought of a mod that would change the genders of all the main characters of the MGS serries, to make it way gayer. But then I thought, firstly, Konami is quite litigious, and that I don't think that changing the voices and character models would do much to the overall queer representation and messages of the story.

So Codename Cardboard box (CCB) is going to be an original new story to represent what it is to be queer in the world right now.

The style I am going for is pretty specific, not quite 1:1 PSX or N64 in graphical fidelity. More like a step between Metal gear solid 1 and 2 as a port to the PC in 1999.

Hopefully I can capture the exact aesthetic, I'm still experimenting between MGS 1 style and MGS 2. I don't fully want to commit to one or the other. So I'm toying around between super low textures (64x64-128x128 max) of MGS1, and the medium detail models of MGS2 (with eyes and a single mesh). This is what I have landed on so far, but things may change in the near future.

I also will be using more modern real time lighting solutions, as I think there can be some gameplay choices that can be effected by this (darkness being a great asset).

As far as gameplay goes I'm going for a patchwork of mechanics from across the serries. So here is a small list to represent how it will feel to move and attack with the character:

The over the shoulder / top down view toggling options from MGS3.

The 3 stance options (stand, crouch, prone) of movement from MGS4.

The auto aiming from MGS2, with the over the shoulder toggle aim from MGS4. (no first person view, for now)

The ledge climbing from MGS 2.

No Stamina bar like in MGS1.

And surprisingly enough a hybrid of the MGS 1 item selection (where you just have all of your weapons available to select at any time, rather than using a backpack)

And of course some other cheeky mechanics that I can't spoil just yet.

But of course all of these screenshots, mechanics, and ideas are works in progress. While they fit the game now, they may be changed to fit the vision of the game better in the future.

So that is it for blog post #1! I will tease the next update just below, but after that I am going to continue my personal gamedev history below that!

Next time:

Blog 2- animation, scripts, and themes.

So Personal gamedev journey. The most vivid memory I have of making a choice to be a game developer was in the year 2002. I was playing Diablo 2, after completing a multiplayer halo 1 campaign . My friends and I were just in awe of games as a storytelling medium. We had been playing on a LAN connection and were thinking about making our own diablo 2 mod or even whole separate homage game. We all chose roles of what we could do to make the game. And none of them really did anything beyond a conversation. I was enthralled thought.

I dabbled in halo moding (I never released anything, so don't bother looking it up.) and thought about making games through the rest of high school.

After graduation I kind of dropped it while I just kind of goofed off for like 3 years. So in 2007 I took some 3d modeling classes and learned how to use 3ds max at my local community college.

I made a few cool looking mechs, but I remember just not being able to do much with the software. If you don't know 3ds max is not a very good 3d software.

So from 2008 to about 2014 I was a bit of a mess. I didn't really do much with my life as I was a disassociated mess ( see blog post 0 for more info) I just was kind of drifting from one job and activity to the next. Those friends I mentioned earlier started a video production company, we made a few short videos for youtube, never got over 40 views. And we just kind of fizzled out. I was the 3d artist of the team. But nothing really clicked.

I felt trapped, cuz I lived in a super expensive area and with my parents. So of all things I moved to Utah to strike out on my own, where I tried to kickstart a 3d printed miniatures company. (I beat hero forge by a little bit, but they had the more solid everything)

After that the unreal engine 4 came out. I poured more and more time into it. I had 0 programming knowledge and had seen games like braid, and fez become popular. So I started just making stuff. When I found a dead-end due to a lack of knowledge I would then try to educate myself on that blind spot. Slowly I learned, UV unwrapping, animation, sprite art, rigging, and more!

That took all of 6 years off and on. Then one day I decided that I had not gotten my shit together. So I looked inward (once again read post 0) and found that I had ADHD and other hang ups that were causing me to not commit to any one project. So I got medicated, and therapated, and learned how to properly learn. So After about 50 false starts. I'm throwing my hat into the ring again. This time doing it for myself. I'm not going to use this blog as a method of checking in, I'm using it to document my journey. No matter where it takes me.

The goal is to release a game on itch.io and steam. I don't care how many units it sells. I want to release something to have fun, and to see where I can take myself.

I will do some attempts at the social media game, if it finds an audience, awesome. If not. K. My only hope is that a queer person somewhere plays my gay ass game and has a gay ass time.

-thanks for reading this loooong poooooost!.

[multi-lefaiye]

Too many but

🗣 Share your favorite dialogue exchange.

🏝 Share your favorite description of a setting.

💔 Share your most heartbreaking line.

📝 Share the first line of your project.

😂 Share your funniest line (or dialogue exchange).

🤯 Share a surprising line, or one where a character realizes something.

👤 Share a line that shows a character’s personality.

🫂 Share a line (or dialogue exchange) that shows the relationship between two characters.

not too many at all! thank you! :D

gonna put my answers under the cut since this is a bit long!

🗣 Share your favorite dialogue exchange.

“I don’t have your resumé on hand right now, but why don’t we do an interview right here? God, fuck, I hate thinking of questions on the spot--okay, what kind of experience do you have?” “I worked at Publix for a few months when I was 16?” “Okay, yeah, that works perfectly. You might actually be a bit over-qualified. Okay, can you tell me about yours- MOTHERFUCKSHITGODDAMMIT.” "Shit, I'm sorry!" "I'm fine, I'm fine. You know what? Fuck this, actually. You're hired."

this is once again from a tftgs thing <3 whoops-

🏝 Share your favorite description of a setting.

Calling the gas station’s break room a break room was truthfully a bit of a misnomer. Really, it was a glorified closet, but the owners had made it clear on multiple occasions that they weren’t interested in shilling out for an actual break room, so it was all they had. So, the employees of the gas station made do, and over time they’d managed to really make the closet feel homey. There was no table, but they’d managed to get their hands on some folding chairs and set them up in a small circle, and a couple of boxes in the back served as rudimentary storage for anything people wanted to keep there. At some point, one of Jack’s coworkers (probably Jerry) had even taken the initiative to hang a little cat poster up on one wall, and someone else (probably Rosa) had hung some Christmas lights to liven up the place.

i swear i do write things that aren't tftgs, please believe me-

💔 Share your most heartbreaking line.

This was far from the first time that someone had looked at Jack and decided he’d failed to meet some standard they’d had for him in their mind, and it wouldn’t be the last.

okay i think that's the last tftgs one i'll share at least for this ask ASDFJK;L i need to prove i write other things.

📝 Share the first line of your project.

this is one of my favorite lines i've written tbh, even if i need to rework the wip it's for.

It’s the dead of night when the monster climbs out of their shallow grave.

😂 Share your funniest line (or dialogue exchange).

Henry then heard a groan and looked to see, in the center of the various objects Addison had spread around the circle of chalk sigils, there was a completely nude man unconscious on the floor of his apartment. The man was handsome in a rugged sort of way, with long, sandy-brown hair and a body riddled with various scars. For a moment, Henry just stared at him. Then he asked the question that was nagging at the back of his mind. “Why the fuck is he naked?”

hehe <3

🤯 Share a surprising line, or one where a character realizes something.

i've shared this bit before, but a bit from fragile things:

Putting a word to it was a relief. He finally knew what was wrong--he just wasn’t a girl like he’d been raised to be! However, this opened the door to a whole new world of possibilities and unknowns, and those frightened him deeply. Giving his problem a name made it real, not something he could shove under the rug and ignore. He was a boy. He was a boy, and that was fucking terrifying.

👤 Share a line that shows a character’s personality.

For the past hour, Roach had been playfully arguing with Yara about something technical that Oliver didn’t quite understand, something specific relating to the editing software they’d started using recently. Syd chimed in now and then, but for the most part, they stayed out of it, occasionally sharing bemused glances with Oliver. He smiled back at them each time, but he couldn’t keep his eyes off Roach for long. Even with his lack of understanding of the subject matter, something about Roach when they were this passionate was captivating. Their grin was wide, and they gestured with their long-fingered hands as if to emphasize each loud, delighted word.

this is from oliver's perspective, but i think it's a good show of roach's personality <3

🫂 Share a line (or dialogue exchange) that shows the relationship between two characters.

Finally, the monster speaks. “Who… are… you…?” The monster’s throat burns with every word as though they’ve eaten glass, each syllable a bloody smear against their chapped lips. The man chuckles. “I am The Raven.” The words mean nothing to the monster, but they can tell the title means something to him. “And I am your savior.” For a long moment, the monster simply stares at him, analyzing him. Eventually, they ask the only question they can think of. “Who… am… I…?” “Who you are doesn’t matter,” The Raven tells them, voice condescending as though he is speaking to a child. “What matters is what you will become.” The monster blinks a few times, uncomprehending. “Be… come?” The Raven does not elaborate.

yeah <3

[oldfangirl81]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

@sugdenlovesdingle this seemed to fun to pass up.

And I'm procrastinating writing.

How many works do you have on AO3? 50

What's your total AO3 word count? 115,555 (lots of wips)

What Fandom do you write for? Marvel, 9-1-1, 9-1-1 LS, Teen Wolf, Top Gun, DC comics, RWRB, Prodigal Son, Doctor Who, BtVS, Eureka, Due South and some SPN.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? High Flying Adventures in LA (Top Gun/911), 5 Times Tony Stark Did Not Want The Evil Person To Flirt With Him and 1 Time He Did Not Mind (Marvel/SPN/Doctor Who/True Blue), Walk Me Home (911/Eureka), Buster The Gay Dog (911), In The City (Top Gun/911/SWAT)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? I try but sometimes it does feel silly to just keep saying Thank you if there isn't anything else I can respond too.

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? If I Fall (BtVS/Doctor Who). Look I was reading a lot of a certain kind of BtVS fic so this one has Xander deciding to join The Master.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Maybe Buster the Gay Dog (911) or A Thousand Good Stories (Top Gun/911 Lone Star). The first Eddie & Buck get together at the end. And the second Bradley & Jake are engaged by the end.

Do you get hate on fics? Rarely. But the funniest one to me was on the 5 Times Tony Stark fic. I was called both a misogynist and homophobic.

Do you write smut? If so what kind? I very rarely write true smut. I do fade to black often. I did write a fic once where Starfire gave Jason a blowjob in an alley. And I swear it isn't exactly what it sounds like but it is at the same time. She was trying to make him stop risking his life by giving him something to live for. Look there is a reason I don't write much smut in over a decade.

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? Yes, I write crossovers. It's kinda my thing really. As for the craziest one? I honestly don't know because a bunch are probably considered odd. Maybe the Marvel crossover with Red White & Royal Blue. Or maybe 9-1-1 and Eureka. Or maybe 9-1-1 Lone Star & Marvel. Or 9-1-1 Lone Star & DC comics. Or maybe my recent Danny Phantom and 9-1-1.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Yup. It was copied word for word. But it was so long ago I couldn't actually tell which of my fics it was. It might even be one of the ones I orphaned in the years to follow because I don't touch that fandom anymore, nor do I want it associated with me.

Have you ever had a fic translated? I don't think so. I'm not against it.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Nope. The closest I've come was Tumblr RP over a decade ago now.

What's your all time favorite ship? I can't really pick. I rarely abandon ships for good. I still love Benton Fraser/Ray K, Blair Sandburg/Jim Ellison, Xander Harris/Spike, John Sheppard/Rodney McKay, Stiles/Derek Hale, Steve McGarret/Danny Williams, Danny Messer/Mac Taylor, Danny Messer/Don Flack, Kaylee Fyre/Simon Tam and most of those have been off the air for years and years now.

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Something About That Boy (Marvel/BtVS) or Where Me Demons Hide? (Marvel/BtVS)

What are your writing strengths? I'd like to say my dialogue. And ridiculous chaotic plots in a fun way.

What are your writing weaknesses? Finishing a story before starting ten more. The non dialogue parts.

Thoughts on writing dialouge in another language in a fic? Be careful there be dragons there. I know I've done it in some fics. And a sentence here or there isn't the worst if you aren't fluent. But be open if someone ever corrects you. And more than that maybe find a beta that is fluent in whatever language you are hoping to add to the fic. I know google translate can be rough.

First fandom you wrote in? Ugh, I don't want to answer but if googling my penname is accurate it would have been May '05 so it appears to have been a Harry Potter and BtVs crossover.

Favorite fic you've written? Toss up between Won't You Come See About Me (Top Gun/Marvel) or Wild Angels (9-1-1 Lone Star/DC Comics). Both are WIPs that are NOT abandoned in the slightest.

If you read all this thanks for supporting my procrastination. And feel free to answer these questions yourself.

[theboarsbride]

For the Writing Ask Meme:

#2 and #22 💜

2. Give short descriptions of all the main characters for [WIP].

Gonna do this for the characters for "Those Red Nights" since it's the WIP I've been working on the most recently! (also these won't be super short, RIP I apologize in advance)

Det. Selene Radcliffe - 28 years of age; a young, freshly-graduated detective. Mute - uses a combination of ASL and a pocket notebook to communicate (the latter of which is reserved for those who aren't fluent in ASL). Has a degree in Psychology and Criminal Justice (as well as a minor in Forensic Sciences) from the University of Wisconsin (Madison). Works hard to prove herself as a smart, strong, determined, and hard-working investigator because of how she is treated differently by her peers for being a mute woman, as well as being the daughter of Arthur Radcliffe, a famed and well-liked PI that worked with the Milwaukee Police Department. She is seen as the ‘privileged trainee’ because of these connections, and she is aware of this privilege, which fuels her determination to prove herself capable and skilled enough in her own right. She also owns a fat cat named Gus (he is important in the story, I swear, lmao), and a lot symbolic motifs related to her character is moon imagery and the color red, as this is a retelling of Little Red Riding Hood. Face claim (and primary source of inspo) is Jodie Foster.

Det. Apollo Esposito - 40 years of age, a seasoned detective that works with the MPD. Is originally from Chicago, and comes from a Black-Hispanic background. Knows ASL because his mom is deaf (sometimes he will sign stuff when speaking out of habit, or he has super animated hand gestures that look like he’s signing). Apollo is a very optimistic and hopeful man, despite seeing the more grim parts of humanity. He uses seeing such grim stuff as inspiration to remain warm and hopeful. He and Selene are partners, both professionally and romantically, and they've also a very deep friendship with one another. Apollo is her voice of hopeful reason, while Selene is his realistic one. The symbolism surrounding his character centers primarily on sun imagery and the color yellow and themes of hope, and his fairytale counterpart is the Huntsman.... he is also a huge Broadway musical nerd. I've no set face claim for him, but it's currently bouncing between Norm Lewis and Samuel Anderson.

Lowell Volkov - 45 years of age, is employed at the Milwaukee Public Museum. He starts off as a very meek, spineless man that allows himself to be pushed around by his peers - which he, unfortunately, interprets as personal slights and cruelties against him (when in reality these people aren't all that rude to him, he just holds a very jaded, hateful worldview). He becomes afflicted with lycanthropy after scratching his hand on an artifact (this concept needs more development), which he initially uses to boost his confidence but ultimately loses himself within this power fantasy, and becomes a cruel and arrogant man. Ultimately, he uses his lycanthropy to commit crimes and murders, becoming a serial killer known as "The Big Bad Wolf" because of the animalistic nature of his kills. Lowell and Selene were once lovers, though very briefly, and their relationship becomes one of predator and prey as they begin to hunt each other in the streets of Milwaukee... A lot of symbolism surrounding Lowell's character is cold, starless nights and wolves, and his lycanthropy is a very lowkey allegory for toxic masculinity and themes surrounding confidence becoming arrogance. Face claim is Bob Odenkirk.

22. How much of your own self/experiences do you believe pours into your projects? if this differs per project, which projects have the most and least of you?

Admittedly I try to distance myself as much as I can from my projects, in terms of putting my own experiences into plots and characters? The closest I've ever came to this was making characters like Edgar in TMATB book nerds because I'm a book nerd lmao dslsdljdslsddsldsklsdk