#i swallowed that pill unquestioningly
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mistress-of-malevolence · 17 days ago
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...And if you're gonna call me a bitch, you better put dumb in front of it, because guess who bought a bottle of "melatonin" from the pharmacy after staring at the shelf for actually 5 minutes trying to decide what dose to get only realizing several hours later that it wasn't melatonin, but magnesium AFTER swallowing a capsule and not even from the taste but from taking a second to READ THE FUCKING LABEL TWICE.
*points thumbs at myself* this girllll
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monstersandmaw · 5 years ago
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Male changeling x female reader  - Part Three (nsfw)
Edit which I’m including in all my works after plagiarism and theft has taken place: I do not give my consent for my works to be used, copied, published, or posted anywhere. They are copyrighted and belong to me.
Wow, I’ve had Issues™ trying to post this tonight. Anyway, here is a late Sunday treat for you, after being up on my Patreon for a week on early release.
This is part three, in which we go to the Spring Equinox Festival in the little village of Iska's Well, and meet someone there that we were not expecting!
Contents: fluff, smut, a bit of feels/angst amid the smut, some more smut, and a sappy ending. Knotting, unprotected sex (fem. reader is on the Pill), and Dunnock's shape-shifting. Words: 5189
Previously: the reader took some time off work to go back to her father’s old cabin in the woods just outside of the tiny hamlet of Iska’s Well, where she rescued a monstrous creature - part bear, part wolf, part... fae - from a nasty trap, and realised that those ethereal blue eyes were the same shade as those of the little boy with whom she used to play in the woods there as a child...
Part One, Part Two
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The equinox festival was just as Dunnock had said - the entirety of the little hamlet, plus the outlying farmsteads and houses, poured into the clearing between the trees, filling it with lively music and chatter. Someone had organised a hog roast, and there was a vegetarian stand too, while in another corner a couple of local cider and schnapps makers had set up stalls of their own. The mile or so walk along the road from the cabin had warmed you up since there as still a bit of a nip to the air, but the huge bonfire that was crackling merrily in the centre of the clearing provided a welcome source of heat and light, as well as a focus for the gathering.  
A small folk band had assembled on one side of the clearing and their lighthearted tunes drifted across the crackling fire towards you, drawing you in like a chant in a temple.  
You weren’t usually the type who just showed up at things like this on your own, but something about the event had seemed more inviting than usual, and the moment that Martha from the village store noticed your arrival, she bustled over and began to coo over you.  
“Oh, my dear, you look lovely!” Martha crooned, “I’m so glad you came. Let’s get you a drink and introduce you to some folks, alright?”
“Sure,” you smiled, amused by her genuine warmth and somewhat busybody nature. The only thing that was lacking was Dunnock. Of course, he couldn’t have attended something like this with so many people, and your heart weighed heavy in your chest at his absence. 
It became clear almost instantly that Martha was trying to set you up with someone’s nephew, much to the chagrin of both of you. However, the moment you both cottoned on, you grinned at each other and reached an unspoken agreement to get along just to get them to stop fussing.  
Robin, it turned out, was actually incredibly sweet, and not interested in the least bit in women, and you sat on a log together and spoke for almost an hour about his work as a potter. He had just begun to experiment with using the natural clay of the area to make his wares, slips, and glazes, and was selling both online and in the local shop. Interesting though it was, after a while you started to get a little chilly. Rubbing your arms, you had just amicably excused yourself and stood up with the intention of heading closer to the large fire in the centre of the gathering when a movement out of the corner of your eye snagged your attention away from quiet Robin and his talk of pottery.  
A tall, broad-shouldered man had just arrived and was apparently staring straight at you from across the leaping flames. Sparks whirled suddenly upwards into the sky as a fire-blanched log crumbled further into the heart of the blaze, and as they twisted wildly and glittered like white hot moths, you caught a flash of intense, supernatural blue on the far side.  
Your heart lurched and leapt in your chest and you instinctively turned your eyes upwards to look for the moon in the sky.  
A huge, pearlescent, completely full moon hung low over the trees, silvering the needles with its soft light and you gasped as you snapped your attention back to the young man. Dunnock’s words about only being able to shift on the full moon washed back into your mind and your jaw went slack as you stared at the stranger.  
Wearing a well-loved and much-patched, waxed fabric jacket in a nondescript shade of brown, he walked slowly around the stones of the fire pit, with hands shoved deep into his pockets and his gaze locked on your face. When he came to a halt in front of you, you stared openly at him.
“Dunnock?” you hissed and his full lips twitched, eyes twinkling. He had a short, dark beard that looked surprisingly well-cared for, and although his skin was weathered, it still carried all those myriad freckles you remembered from the little barefoot boy. “Is it really you?”
He blinked slowly - that telltale, slow, almost lazy movement giving him away as much as the colour of the eyes behind the long, thick lashes. “Surprised?” he asked in a husky baritone.  
“Uh, yeah?” you snorted, smacking him playfully on the chest with the back of your hand. “Look at you! Wow! And why didn’t you tell me you were coming?”
His answering chuckle - low and deeply satisfied - set heat tingling between your legs and you bit your lower lip. His blue gaze shifted to your mouth as he replied, “I wanted to surprise you, that’s all.”
“Well you did!” you laughed. “And wow, you… you grew up handsome!” You laughed and brushed your index finger fleetingly along his dark, close-cropped beard and added, “I like this.”
Before he could answer, Martha had reappeared at your elbow like an unwanted hummingbird and looking a little put out at the potential rival for your affections. She looked Dunnock up and down as if he were the town’s unwholesome rascal, and tutted softly. “I don’t think we’ve been introduced,” she said rather tartly.  
You looked from her to Dunnock and unthinkingly opened your mouth, “This is…”
“Dan,” he interrupted, extending a rough hand to her. “Pleased to meet you.”
“Martha,” she said and he quirked his lips a little and inclined his head. “You two know each other then?”
“Oh, we go way back,” you grinned, digging Dunnock in the ribs. His torso was invitingly solid beneath the softness of the jacket. “I just didn’t know he was going to be here tonight.”
The changeling was still grinning his lopsided smirk when Martha’s little gaggle of friends appeared to sweep her away like an unwelcome flock of cooing doves, and he tugged your arm and twitched his head towards the other side of the fire pit where there was a small dance space.
“Dance with me,” he murmured in your ear and you nodded, suddenly breathless as he slid his hands into yours.  
You weren’t the only ones moving softly to the folky music from the little group nearby, but everything faded to two pinpricks of blue in no time. It felt like the most natural thing in the world as Dunnock’s rough hand slid to your waist. He held you close and you inhaled the soft, mossy scent of him.  
For a long while, neither of you spoke, letting your bodies take over, pressing closer and closer with each step until you tilted your head to look up at him and saw an even brighter blue light burning in his gaze. “You’re so beautiful,” he whispered without breaking step. His grip twitched slightly and he blurted, “I want to kiss you…”
With a smile you slid your hand from his shoulder up to his neck and gently scrunched a fistful of the grey-brown hair at the nape of his neck in your fingers. He swallowed - growling audibly, his Adam’s apple bobbing, pupils widening, pulse thudding in his neck. Gently drawing him down to you, you kissed him.  
The soft groan he made as the two of you kissed kindled something warm, flickering, and a little fragile inside you again. He kissed you breathless until you drew back, laughing quietly. His hand had sunk to the very base of your spine, and he stared at you with slightly glassy eyes.  
“I’ve wanted to do that since I first saw you again,” he admitted.  
“I didn’t know it was a full moon tonight, otherwise I might have stayed at the cabin instead of coming here.”
He twirled you softly beneath his outstretched arm, resuming the dance as if you’d never paused. “Then I wouldn’t have got to dance with you,” he said in a low, soft voice. Gods, but it was doing things to you that you hadn’t known your body wanted to do any more. It made you ache everywhere, inside and out until you weren’t sure you could bear it any longer.  
The warmth of his palms and the closeness of his body drew you even closer to him and you laid your cheek against his chest. “Would you still have… looked like this if you’d come to the cabin tonight?” you asked hesitantly.  
“Mn,” he hummed. “I wanted to show you, but I was… in two minds.”
Your head twitched up to look at him and you found a complicated expression on his handsome face. “Why?”
He rolled his big blue eyes and shook his head. “Can’t you guess? I look like… that for most of the month…”
“And you think I’d, what, regret you showing me this somehow?”
He shrugged. “Something like that.”  
“Dunnock…?”
“Mmm?”
“Kiss me again?”
Unquestioningly, he did, and you poured as much of your heart into the gesture as you could, this time leaving him breathless and dazed instead. “Stop,” he growled playfully, “People are staring.”
“Let them.”
How long you danced and talked and shared food beneath the moon that night, you couldn’t have said, but it felt like hours. The moon rose fully and then began to dip towards the trees as midnight came and went.  
“You want to head back to the cabin?” Dunnock eventually asked as the pair of you sat on the log, fingers intertwined in his lap, thumbs tracing idle arcs over each other’s skin.  
For an answer, you stretched up and kissed him and he laughed quietly, though he returned the gesture with the same enthusiasm he’d had for it all night. With a nod, you slipped away through the trees with him. You could feel the eyes of a few of the remaining village folk boring into your retreating backs and figured you’d probably be the talk of the place for a while. Whatever. Let them gossip away.  
The pair of you had barely gone ten paces when he winced and grunted softly.  
“Dunnock?”
“M’fine,” he mumbled, catching your hand in his and squeezing fiercely. He stopped walking and drew you close to him with an easy tug, and then with a fervour that had apparently only been in the background before, he kissed you so hard you saw stars. Groaning behind the kiss, he backed you up against a tall pine and ran his hands along your jaw and into your hair, breathing hard.  
With a frenzied gasp, you tipped your head to one side and he began to leave nipping, rough kisses down the exposed skin, all teeth and tongue and desire.  
“I want you, Dunnock,” you found yourself moaning, rolling your hips against him and finding him more than half hard already.  
He bit off another grunt and buried his nose against your neck. “I want you too,” he snarled. “Gods, I want you…”
“Come on then,” you grinned, wriggling free and tugging him down the path through the pines towards the road.  
He walked beside you, holding your hand and protecting you from any oncoming traffic by placing himself between you and it, though you only passed one car on your whole walk back.  
The moment you stepped off the road and onto the gravel track that led to the cabin, he kissed you again.  
Tactile in a way that you’d only suspected until now, Dunnock was a sensitive and vocal lover. Soft, animalistic growls emanated from him from time to time, reminding you that he was not human despite his current appearance. When his eyes were closed, it was easy to forget that he was a changeling, a Fae, and that he spent much of his time in a form that was very much not-human.  
At the foot of the stairs to the cabin, he lost patience completely and picked you up, hoisting you up so that you had to hook your thighs around his hips while he held you. He backed you into the cabin door hard enough to drive the wind from your chest for a moment, and he began to growl and snarl softly as he kissed every inch of exposed skin that he could reach.  
“You’re so beautiful,” he chanted over and over as he worshipped you, setting your skin tingling with each kiss, each nip of his teeth, the scratch of his beard and the press of his fingers into the muscles and curves of your body.  
You were wet and shivering with want by the time you finally managed to convince him to put you down long enough to unlock the cabin door. In a rush punctuated with more kisses, the pair of you began to strip in the living area of the cabin. You only managed to get his shirt off before he was back, hands beneath your own top, lifting it up so that he could kiss down between your breasts before dropping down to kiss your bare stomach on his knees with obvious reverence.  
It took some work, but you finally convinced him to get back on his feet so you could finish undressing him, and you worked your fingers into the corded muscles of his back in encouragement. He threw his head back and let out a broken, shuddering moan; half howl and half snarl. None of the noises he made could have been mistaken for human in the slightest.  
“You like that?” you asked, raking your nails over his tanned back before shifting them to undo the old brass buckle of his worn leather belt and the button of his jeans.
“Mnph,” he grunted before surging forwards and tipping you carefully back onto the hearth rug. He loomed over you, biceps bunched as they bore his weight with easy grace while his hips ground against your body.  
“Clothes off,” you barked, cutting off roughly as he drew back the cup of your bra to lave his tongue around your hardening nipple before taking it between his teeth and sucking briefly. “Ah - Dunnock!” you grunted. The sound of his name seemed to penetrate the fog clouding his mind and he leaned back.  
“I…” he blinked slightly, still holding a perfect, unwavering plank above you. “I shouldn’t…” he faltered, panting. “We should…”
“We should keep going,” you encouraged emphatically, “But we need to take the rest of our clothes off first.”
“Are you sure?” he asked in a tiny voice, doubt flooding into his handsome features. “I’m not even human…”
“I know,” you smiled. “Dunnock, I want you.”
His blue eyes rolled closed and he lowered himself back down to lie atop you, his weight pressing you into the soft rug beneath as he breathed in the scent of your skin and hair for a moment.  
“Dunnock?”
He groaned again but didn’t move.  
“What is it?”
“My name,” he finally mumbled into your hair. “When you speak my name…”
“But it’s not your True Name,” you scoffed, remembering what he’d said about the Fae and the power of True Names. “Is it?”
“I have no other,” he said and you went perfectly still beneath him.  
“Tonight…” you began, casting your mind back, “When I introduced you to Martha… You stopped me speaking your name.”
“Mmm.”
“Dunnock…”
He shuddered almost violently and mouthed at your pulse point with his teeth, grinding his groin against you; claiming you.  
“Dunnock…” you whispered right against the shell of his ear and he let out another fractured, wounded noise. “Roll over…” you said, encouraging him to lie on his back so that you could finally finish undressing him.
He splayed out almost comically, arms outstretched, thighs slightly apart, chest rising and falling rapidly as his inhuman, lust-blown eyes tracked your every movement. Your fingers worked the still-open waistband of his jeans down and over his hips, and he helped a little by lifting himself up. His legs were lean and muscled, and as you skated your palms up his bare thighs, he shuddered and began to gasp and pant. His erection made an obvious tent in his boxers and you palmed it, feeling the hard heat of him, and he tipped his head back, exposing his throat, and keened.  
As his thighs began to tremble, you continued to palm him through the fabric of his boxers and he rocked his head from side to side under the delicious torment. Eventually he grunted your name and moved as if trying to take himself in his hand and do what you had only hinted at. Swatting his hand away, you relented and drew his black boxer-briefs off as well.
His erection sprang free, printing a bead of pre-come onto his abs and leaving a connecting line from his stomach to his cock. It twitched and you watched his balls clench a little under your gaze. “You’re beautiful, Dun,” you smiled.  
His answering reaction wasn’t quite what you’d expected, and his eyes turned sad.  
Hoping to distract him from his thoughts, you took his cock in your hand and ducked low to lick a long stripe from base to tip. He reared a little into the gesture and then fell back against the rug, head clonking on the floor as he collapsed. “Fuck,” he hissed. “Fuck, that’s - ah - that’s so good…” he panted as you squeezed his cock and worked your hand up his shaft, your free hand cupping his balls and stroking them gently.  
When you thumbed through the pre-come that was beading profusely at the tip, he gave another broken grunt and his hips rose again, toes curling.
“You’re so sensitive,” you smiled.  
“I…” he began, but he cut off, cheeks flushing. The heat crept down his face, warmth spreading visibly all the way to his collarbones. He tried again. “I’ve never…”  
That made you pause. “You’ve never been with anyone?”
He shook his head, eyes closed.  
Heat roared inside you knowing that he trusted you enough to do this with you, and you redoubled your efforts to make this feel good for him.
It obviously worked because he slowly became a shivering, whimpering mess as you worked him, easing off when it got too much, and increasing the pressure when he started to relax again.  
“You’re going to kill me,” he rasped some time later. “Please… I can’t…” and he eased himself up onto one shaky elbow and looked at you with those searingly blue eyes. “Please…” he breathed.  
“You want me to make you come?” you asked. “Or do you want…” you bit your lip. You were on the pill, and clean, and if he hadn’t been with anyone, it should be safe enough… It wasn’t exactly safe sex, per se, but somehow you figured you could deal with anything else later. The risks were low enough. “Do you want to go further?”
Shyly, he nodded.  
“Which?”
“Further. I want you… it’s all I’ve been able to think about for days…”
“You’ve thought about me while getting off at night, have you?” you asked teasingly, suddenly imagining Dunnock as he was in his other form, huge and dark, with those big teeth and clawed hands, lying on his back in a bed of bracken with his big cock in his hand, moaning your name. You felt yourself grow wetter at the mere thought of it, lust coiling.  
Dunnock gasped again, but this time it wasn’t anything you’d done. He grunted softly in pain and grimaced, his stomach clenching.  
“Dunnock? You ok?”
“Mn,�� he hummed, though he’d gone a shade or two paler. “Please…?” he asked, opening his eyes and looking a touch frantic.  
“Alright…” you smiled. “How do you want me?”  
He looked up at you and seemed a little lost for words.  
“You want me to ride you?” you asked coyly, trailing a fingertip up his thigh and sending him sprawling flat onto his back again. “Yes?”  
Dunnock nodded, cock twitching and drooling. “Yes…”
Straddling his hips, you dragged your wet heat over him and he arched into you, mouth opening. His canines were longer than you remembered them being, but you didn’t have time to think more on that as he adjusted his position beneath you and his tip slid inside you.  
He froze, but you instinctively rocked back against him, taking him deep inside you and he let out a long, low, keening howl that was anything but human.  
After pausing to let yourself adjust to taking his cock fully inside you at that intense angle, you rolled your hips a few times and his breath began to quicken, harsh and loud.  
“Oh gods,” he swore, writhing a little. “Oh gods… You feel so good. You’re so tight… so hot… I… oh gods… I can’t…”  
The way he filled you was delicious, enough to drive the air from your lungs with the perfection of each stroke, and you’d pitched forwards with your hands braced on his shoulders. Sweat glistened at the ‘v’ of his throat, and he was noticeably trembling all over. His skin was still paler than you recalled from earlier.  
“Dunnock?” you asked and he whimpered. Pausing your rhythm, you called his name again, but this time he didn’t respond. “Dunnock? Look at me?”
Reluctantly, he did and you found his eyes blazing even brighter. “I…” he struggled to talk suddenly and tears rimmed his eyes. “I think I’m going to shift…” he whispered. “I can feel it… I… Oh gods, no… I’m sorry…”
Tears spilled suddenly down his cheeks and disappeared into his thick, ash brown hair, and his hands moved to your hips with a fluttering hesitancy that reminded you of butterfly wings.  
“No…” he all but sobbed.  
“You need me to move?” you asked and he nodded.  
Drawing off him left you feeling empty, but your concern for Dunnock took precedent over anything else.  
He’d begun to spasm a little now and he pushed himself up onto all fours, cock somehow still flushed hard and drooling pre-come liberally onto the bare floorboards despite the pain evident in the rest of his body. “Don’t look,” he hissed, but the sound turned into a growl as his back rounded like an angry cat and thick, black hair began to ripple down his spine from the nape of his neck to his tail bone. “Please…” His voice distorted, becoming deeper and rougher as his body changed.  
There was nowhere for you to go while he shifted, but you looked away, and in only minute or so, it was over. “Dunnock?” you asked when the dull crack of shifting bones had faded and all that filled the room was the sound of his heavy breathing.  
“It’s over,” he said in a winded, dejected voice.  
There, still hunched over on all fours but much larger, was the Dunnock you had met in the forest: dark, rippling fur; large paws, claws; a slender, strong body; stocky hind legs and long forelimbs; a head somewhere between that of a wolf and a bear, with long canines and fierce blue eyes; and the soft, leaf-shaped ears of a deer.  
You had barely moved from where you’d rolled out of his way, but now you came back to him on your hands and knees and sat beside him. He turned his face away, ears pinned flat against his head, horrified.  
“Dunnock, look at me,” you said again.  
“No…” he snarled, voice a little deeper now,  but just as rough as before. “I… I should go.”
“Please don’t…” you blurted, reaching for his arm.  
He flinched away as your fingers touched his soft fur, but you refused to let go. Squeezing the solid band of muscle around his upper arm, you shook him gently. “Dunnock…” you repeated. “Nothing’s changed…”
In a flash, he whipped his head around to face you, eyes blazing, teeth bared. “Everything has changed,” he snarled; a vicious, volatile creature. “Look at me!”
“I am looking!” you fired back fiercely. “And I’m telling you that nothing has changed about the way I feel for you.”
At that, Dunnock went completely still. Unblinkingly, he stared at you, and then lowered one hip to the ground to sit, stunned, and continue staring at you.  
“Say something?” you half laughed, vaguely thinking about covering up now. Was it too late? Had the moment truly passed?  
“What do you want me to say?” he asked in a heartbreakingly broken whisper. “I wanted one night with you. And I couldn’t even have that…”
“Sun’s not up yet,” you smiled. “Though I’m assuming the moon has set?”
“Probably,” he said. “I don’t normally stay shifted for the whole night anyway. I thought… I thought I had more time…”  
An idea occurred to you and you shuffled a little closer. He watched you warily, but let you put your hands on his flank. You stroked gentle circles there, smiling as he involuntarily began to stretch that hind leg out under the invitation of your touch, taloned toes flexing. “Lie down again for me?” you asked and to your surprise, he complied.  
He didn’t take his intense eyes off you though.  
Splaying your fingers wide, you ran them the ‘wrong’ way up through the thick fur of his belly and chest, and he shuddered bodily, head rocking back again.  
Nothing’s changed, Dunnock,” you said again, and mounted his hips in a single smooth motion as if straddling a skittish horse. He was significantly larger like this, and his cock had retreated into what appeared to be a large sheath, covered with short, velvety black fur. As you rocked your hips over it, feeling it nudge luxuriantly against your wet, swollen clit, he let out another dark moan and whispered your name.  
“You… You don’t have to…” he began, but you cut him off with a second roll of your hips.  
“I want to,” you said fiercely, grabbing a fistful of the thick fur at his shoulders in each hand and tugging. “I want you, Dunnock.”
In response, he rocked his hips against you a little and his jaw slackened a touch to reveal the monstrous teeth behind his black lips. It didn’t take him long for his cock to slide free of the sheath, and you glanced down to see that it was thick, beautiful, flushed red, and drooling everywhere.  
To your surprise, a second later, he rose up and bowled you over onto your back to switch positions with you. “Is this alright?” he managed to gasp as he paused with his tip lined up with you, teasing you.  
“Yes!” you cried, spreading your legs wider in invitation. “Please, Dunnock, I need you.”
In his present form, he loomed over you, dark and hulking and nothing but muscle and teeth and fur and blazing blue eyes. He seated himself inside you in a single stroke that left you both winded and reeling.  
“Fuck, you’re so tight,” he hissed, bringing his muzzle down to your ear. His hot breath fanned out over your skin and down your neck, bringing goosebumps to life along your whole body, and sparking pleasure along your spine with the sheer size of him inside you like this.  
“Move, Dunnock,” you grunted, reaching for his ribs with your hands and scratching your nails along his skin.  
A series of tremors ran through him, though whether it was from your touch or the repeated use of his name, you couldn’t tell, but either way, he did start moving. Slowly at first, as though afraid of hurting you, he nudged his hips against yours, but when you hooked your legs up around his waist and drew yourself further onto his cock, he let out a deep, shuddering growl.  
His teeth clacked as his jaw worked, and a moment later he had opened his mouth and latched his maw gently around your neck. He was holding you in place with everything he had as he picked up the speed and force of his pace, pounding into you. Soon, each thrust had you seeing stars, and he seemed to be stretching you wider and wider each time. Drool slid down your neck from between his teeth and his rough tongue laved at your skin before he withdrew the sharp points of his teeth and reared up, catching you deep and making your back arch. The sensations were almost too much. A searing, white hot need was building, coiling, crescendoing inside you in a way you’d never experienced before.  
“I’m going to knot you…” he suddenly admitted, raising his head. The thought of that took you by surprise and then left you delighted at the idea. “Fuck… I…”
“Dunnock!” you gasped, snatching breaths between each powerful, mind-blankingly beautiful stroke. “I want you. I’m so close. Dunnock, I want all of you…”
And with that, you felt what had to be the knot at the base of his cock slide inside you. A second later, Dunnock came with a roar, hips flush to yours as he emptied himself into you. Over and over his hips almost spasmed, his powerful legs thrusting into you as deep as he could get, filling you, and as he came, so your own vision blanked out and you clenched around him.  
“Oh gods,” you heard him curse as you came, milking every drop from him. “Fuck… oh gods…” and the rest of his orgasm rammed into him. Every muscle was locked, rigid and trembling as the force of it ripped through him.  
It took a long time for his orgasm to fade, but when it did, he seemed to crumple, all the strength leaving his immensely powerful body in one go. He sagged forwards on top of you, barely taking his weight on his elbows as his spine bowed downwards and he lay on top of you, seated deep and breathing hard.  
Your hands traced patterns through his fur until he was finally able to withdraw some minutes later, the loss of his knot and cock leaving you almost devastatingly empty again. His release slid out of you, over your thighs and onto the floorboards. He whispered your name and you felt the power of it thrum through you.  
In answer, you breathed his own True Name back at him. “Dunnock…”
After that, he staggered to his feet and then easily picked you up, placing your exhausted body onto the bed in the corner. He joined you after a perfunctory clean, and the heat of his body as he nuzzled up beside you sent you drifting towards a blissful sleep. “Stay?” you managed to hiss. “Please? Don’t go back to the forest tonight.”
“Mm,” he replied, tucking you tightly against his side with a lethal-taloned paw and drawing the covers up over both of you. “I’ll stay.”
With the comforting pressure of his body cocooning yours and the weight of his arm slung over your waist, you let your body be finally claimed by sleep; memories of sparking embers and searing blue eyes swirling through your mind’s eye.  
“Dunnock,” you breathed one more time as you teetered on the fragile edge of waking and sleeping.  
“Mmm?”
“Dunnock.”
___
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revived-ophelia · 4 years ago
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You know how we talk about stuff like "history goes in cycles" or "people never learn from history's mistakes"?
Consider the idea of "everything has an equal and opposite reaction". People either accept or push back. In terms of social movement or ideals, it gets taken to extremes because nuance is lost when trying to consider the views of an entire population. The voices that stand out and drive a group are the loudest ones...and those are usually the ones motivated by anger. (Or money.)
So we find ourselves caught on back-and-forth of public opinion. Children rebel against their parents ideals and values. "We're not going to be stodgy and backward like them! We're going to change things."
The second wave feminists push through legitimate social change for liberation of women, but the next wave won't be like them, not like those man-hating harpies. "We can be progressive too, but fun! All we need to do is stop alienating men...because that's the way we get our rights, we ask the men in power to give them to us. So be a little sexier, a little nicer. For feminism, for you, for all of us. Don't be like the bitter old second-wave."
Rebranding their own mild acceptance of the status quo, of misogyny and patriarchy. The world slowly pushes back, both insidious and overt ways. The hard-won progress of the eras of civil rights gets its opposite reaction from the people who don't want us to have it. Our side hit its boiling point, and then theirs. Back and forth.
We're waiting on the next boiling point, aren't we? When people see the pushback for what it was, a return to the status quo repackaged in whatever the most popular dialogue was at the time. When they see that they unquestioningly swallowed bigotry because it came in a pill that looked different from the ones forced on our predecessors.
People are people in every age, the same weaknesses and strengths. Not necessarily better or smarter or worse or dumber. We build on what came before us, and try to avoid their failures, but the things that obstructed them remain if it has not been pulled up at the root, because the people who would benefit from bigotry, inequality, and conflict, they too have built upon those that came before.
They keep saying things like "we live in unprecedented times," but times like this have come before. I don't know if this is comforting or foreboding or what I intended it to be. People like to have things to believe in, things that are unchanging and constant to hold onto when life is uncertain, so I keep that law of thermodynamics as something to believe in - to all forces there is an equal and opposite reaction; so long as humans live, they will desire freedom and self-determination and chafe against the forces that would keep them from it.
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unverifiable-frogmatter · 8 years ago
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Sometimes I feel blue
http://nymag.com/thecut/2016/10/when-your-husband-doesnt-want-a-second-baby.html
This story sums up what happens sometimes, in my thoughts, as well as what goes on around me. 
Compromise. It’s a word that gets bandied about easily enough, but to all parties concerned, is the true meaning of it fully appreciated?
Expectations bitterly stolen. My own experience has been a bitter pill to swallow. 
I keep this deliberately vague, because I don’t desire to fully disclose the extent of my feelings. 
I won’t deny, however, the impact of children, has been a fully profound one. For me, what it gives me and what I have given away, has been given willingly and received to the great humbleness of my heart. 
For the most part. 
Painful memories of certain experiences still eager to remind me of what can and does go wrong. Haunting me, with the nagging reminder of assertions I blindly set aside, in full acceptance of what others were doing, that I gave away, in the wilderness of believing that “they” knew what they were doing, that in spite of the giving away of my dignity in exchange for bringing in new life, I believed that I was in good hands, I couldn’t have any say in what happened with my care because it was in the lap of the medical professionals now.
I’ve learned much since. 
There are the inevitable regrets, but why regret? It’s done, the choices made then, were made in the spirit of it being “right” at the time.
Would I do things differently now? Yes.
Of course, there are elements of control over my body and the say I had in the proceedings, that were given away unquestioningly, it’s naivety, and that is all.
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