#i still quote this video over a decade later

[justsomeguycore]

does the mad scottish girl know what a mark she made on my heart and also vocabulary

[felassan]

Mark Darrah YouTube video: 'BioWare's 30th Anniversary. What I Remember from 3 Decades'

Video description:

BioWare turned 30 on February 1st. Can i remember something from every year they existed? Can I do it in less then 3 hours?

[source]

Mark Darrah recently released this YouTube video in which he goes through thirty years of BioWare, it's definitely worth a watch.

Some notes and quotes from the video under the cut. In places it goes into the behind-the-scenes of DA4 development.

In 2005 and 2006, Mark Darrah was working on Jade Empire 2, which would ultimately become Revolver. In the early days JE2 was seen as a direct sequel to JE. About halfway through the year there was a pivot to moving it into a modern setting. Originally it was 'Jade Modern', set in a modern world that existed if you had taken the secret ending of JE and agreed with the Emperor. But over time it shifted to be a different setting that had nothing to do with JE

Mark: "I guess if you really wanted to try you could make the argument that because Sonic Chronicles shipped in 2008 and DA:O didn't ship until 2009, that actually DA:O actually shipped using the Sonic Chronicles dialogue system"

Mark: "At the end of 2009, I think it was the last day we were working before the Christmas break, that's the time when the leadership of the DA franchise had the meeting where we decided that we were going to make DA2, that we were going to essentially jump on the grenade that was being placed in front of BioWare and try to fill the revenue gap that was left by SW:TOR [slipping]"

"2010 is also when we are trying to make DA2, in a really fast rush. We started working on it before DA:O - Awakening had even shipped. What's happened is that SW:TOR has slipped again and EA is basically telling BioWare to make up the revenue. So we are trying to create a product in a very restricted timeline in order to do what EA wants, which is to fill a revenue gap [in that fiscal year]"

"2013 is when the PAX presentation for DA:I happened. [...] It carries some controversy because the game definitely shifted from there to the game that shipped 14 months later. There are things that are represented there that imply a more army-controlling, grand military strategy kind of game that ultimately proved to not be the game that DA:I was supposed to be. But at that point in time those elements still existed in nascent form, or were trying to exist at the very list, so they exist in that demo as well"

DA:I was a very tiring project

After DA:I shipped some of the team went onto Anthem, some went onto ME:A, and some stayed on and made DA:I DLC

DA:I DLC was mostly made in 2015. Leadership on it was largely given to more junior leaders to help them grow and potentially move them into more senior positions

The senior leadership of DA:I spent most of 2015 laying very early frameworks and concepts for what would become DA4 Joplin. The idea was to take a technology that they knew and try to fix their processes and tools pipeline to allow development in this pipeline to go more smoothly

In 2016, all of the people who were on DA:I DLC moved onto ME:A or Anthem. 2016 is the point when most of Mark's time was spent fighting for resources to get them onto Joplin

^ "Periodically EA pushes for franchises to be bigger. They want billion dollar franchises, or they only wanna make the best six games or the best twelve games. In 2016 I built a plan to ship Dragon Ages. The idea was to make Joplin on a relatively regular timeline. At this point in time I believe Anthem is still supposed to ship in 2018 so probably Joplin was supposed to ship in 2019, maybe 2020. But the idea was, ship Joplin, and then we would do two fast-follow sequels, each taking 18 months, and then we would retool after that happened. Did it get Dragon Age to be a billion dollar franchise? It required a little bit of creative accounting to make that work, but it got closer than you would think. The idea was to have minimal DLC or even an expansion pack, and then quickly move onto the sequel. So the idea of increasing the revenue stream was simply to have games come out faster, which I think is not a terrible idea, but this is also the height of infatuation with the concept of live service games"

"In 2016 as ME:A is trying to ship, they are looking for more resources including leadership, and this is when I led a bunch of people that are still on Joplin onto ME:A. The Dragon Age Finaling Team is that group of people. And I'll say that if you see an acronym and it includes 'The Dragon Age Team' in any way you can probably assume that acronym was intentional. Dragon Age Finaling Team is 'daft', and yes it was basically us sort've passively aggressively rebelling against this resource draw"

"ME:A ships in 2017 and what's supposed to happen is that most of the people who were working on ME:A from Edmonton are gonna move onto Anthem, and the people who were working on ME:A in Montreal are supposed to form a large part of the team for DA. But that's not what happens. The team in Montreal ends up getting moved over to the actual leadership in Montreal. There's a point in 2017 when I tried to force Joplin through one of the production gates, to basically make the argument that it actually deserves to be much bigger. It doesn't work and it probably wouldn't have worked anyway"

2017 also marks when Joplin pivots to become Morrison

2017 is also when Mark moved from DA leadership to Anthem leadership. "Theoretically DA and Anthem simultaneously, but I think even in the earliest moments it was obvious that's not what was going to happen"

2017 was a very busy year at BioWare, a lot of things happened and a lot of changes occurred within it

In 2018 Mark was 110% focused on shipping Anthem. "The DA team was trying to do what it can with its very restricted resources with its pivot to being a live service. This is also when it releases the Dread Wolf trailer at the VGAs. That trailer exists in large part to just anchor the title in the public consciousness because there isn't really any massive development happening on the franchise at this time"

When Anthem went to PAX, this was right after a security incident with one of EA's sports franchises. As a result, EA was very concerned about security, so the Anthem team at PAX had a security presence provided by the Pinkertons (private security company), protecting the Anthem people at PAX

In 2019 Anthem shipped. Some of its resources remained to support it in live service and the remainder moved over to DA4. Mark went back onto DA after being away for 16 months and found that things had moved on and that it was a very different landscape. "Coming back from Anthem to a very different DA is pretty hard for me because the game has shifted underneath. My natural instinct is to move forward with whatever we currently have, but in this case because the landscape has mutated so heavily, it takes me quite a long time to find my footing again"

In 2020, for DA4, "We are starting to get some traction, the game is starting to look like something", but then "in March of 2020, COVID hit. Everyone goes home, that is definitely highly disruptive to the development of DA."

In December 2020 “I resign from BioWare, but I actually remain on at BioWare until February 2021"

In late 2022 Mark played a build of Dragon Age: The Veilguard. "It's not called that yet but this is when I start to be involved in the franchise again"

“By 2023 in April I am working with BioWare publicly again, helping them finish DA:TV, and I do that through 2023 and 2024"

"So it's 2025 now and things are changing at BioWare. I hope that BioWare still has a lot of strong years ahead of it. I hope that we willcontinue to see great games come out of their doors. I guess we will see what the future brings. I hope that everyone whose job was lost finds a new place to work, and hopefully it's an even better place, hopefully the situation you find yourself in in the future is better than the one that you come from. Some people are moving around within the EA organization. Some people unfortunately have lost their jobs completely. This is going to be a tough time for a bunch of people and I hope that everyone can show empathy and compassion to people whose lives have been disrupted."

[source]

[viking-raider]

Sy's Therapy Barn

Summary: Austin Syverson is newly retired from the Army and struggling to cope with his PTSD. Until he decides to take a chance on a hobby, most wouldn't think could help, and the person there to help teach him how to do it.

Pairing: Syverson/Reader

Word Count: 5k

Rating: M - Quick-Burn, Language, Angst, Fluff, Mentions of PTSD, Combat Fatigue, Trauma, Wine drinking, Flirting, Support System, Movie Quotes, Leap of Faith, Mentions (but no depictions) of Mental Illness, Domestic Violence, Alcoholism, SMUT - Light, P in V

Inspiration: I saw this Instagram video of a handsome, buff gentleman that ran a pottery business and promoted it on the site.

Author’s Note: I hope you enjoyed it. I am so sorry to any Pottery people for butchering it.

Syverson wouldn't lie, even though he had thought the hobby was stupid, the first time he thought about it. But, upon seeing a poster at an outdoor market he had decided to attend one, warm Dallas weekend, to get out of the house. Something inside of Sy had urged him to save the number in his phone, before finding the ale stand.

It wasn't until almost a month later, after waking up in the dead of night. He laid curled up in a ball, hugging his knees and struggling to breath. With the blankets and pillows thrown off the king-sized bed, and the black fitted sheet beneath him drenched in his sweat. Aika pressed against his back and whimpering at her owner's distress. It was then that Sy knew he needed something more, other than just denial, the gun range and booze to deal with his PTSD and Combat Fatigue.

He wasn't about to go sit down on some squeaky metal, folding chair, in the basement of some random religious church, listening to other Vets talk about their combat experience. Everyone nodding their heads and offering sympathy and the Word of God. Sy had stopped believing in God over a decade ago. Because, how could some magical man in the sky, with some grand plan for you, before and after you died, allow such bullshit evil into the world.

He didn't want sympathy, far from it.

Austin Syverson, also didn't do sympathy.

So, he pulled up the number from the outdoor market and gave the business a call.

“Mini's Pottery Haven, how can I help you?” A cheery voice chimed on the other end.

Sy let out a hard breath. “Hi, I saw your poster at a market, a couple weeks ago, for a pottery class.” He said, rubbing a palm over his buzzed head, feeling stupid for calling a pottery business, thinking it would help him, in any way, with his trauma. “I was wondering, if you're still doing classes?”

“Yes, we are!” She confirmed, happily. “We have one tonight, with two spots left, if you'd like to join it.”

“Oh!” Sy started, surprised, not expecting one so soon, hoping for a day to work up the nerve to call her back and cancel. “How much is it?”

“Thirty dollars, for just one person, and sixty dollars for a couple.” She informed him, pressing her phone to her ear and bringing up the planner on her computer. “You can pay when you arrive at the class.” She added, distractedly.

Sy paced his kitchen for a moment, before pausing and straightening his back. “I'll take one of the spots and pay the thirty, when I arrive.”

“Excellent! Can I have your name, please?”

“Syverson.” He answered, out of pure habit.

“All right, we look forward to seeing you tonight, and what you create!” She told him, her voice upbeat and optimistic, like she expected Sy to be the next Michelangelo, before hanging up.

“The boys would lose their shit, if they ever find out I tried pottery.” Sy said, stuffing his phone into the front pocket of his jeans.

Later that night, Sy found himself standing out front of the humble, little pottery shop, the full window front was bright from the lights inside, which was flowing with people, all standing around chatting with each other and holding glasses of wine.

“At least, they have booze.” Sy commented to himself.

“First time?” A soft voice asked, from behind him.

“Huh?” He frowned, turning around to find a gorgeous woman standing behind him, a large bag slung over her shoulder, as she regarded him with a kind expression. “Oh, yeah. You?” He asked, trying to be polite.

“Naw, I've been getting my hands messy with clay for years.” You smiled at him, patting your bag. “I assume you're here for the class.” You asked, motioning towards the shop.

“I am.” Sy nodded, licking his lips. “Just working up the nerve to go inside.” He explained to you.

“Ah, yeah. We pottery nerds can be dangerous.” You teased, smirking up at him. “You make one reference to Ghost in there and they'll turn you into a clay mold. If not, pelt you out of the shop with lumps of it.” You giggled, moving by him to step up onto the curb and grab the door handle.

A laugh rumbled out of Sy's broad chest, a genuine smile spreading across his face. “I'll make sure to keep the Ghost quotes to myself then.” He said, turning his sparkling blue eyes towards you.

“Well, no time like the present.” You told him, pulling the door open and holding it for him.

“That's true.” He nodded, his smile softly fading as he joined you on the sidewalk, stopping beside you for a moment. “Thanks for the pep talk.” He said, giving you a gentle nod, before going inside.

The place was a buzz with voices as he paused by the counter, taking out his wallet to pay for his admission for the night's class. He glanced over his shoulder to see where you'd gone, but you had vanished somewhere into the crowd. Shrugging, figuring you'd paid in advance or had some sort of membership, he handed over his bank card to Mini, the owner of the business, who was a sweet looking, elderly woman, dressed in a loose and colorful, bohemian strap dress. Taking his card and the Hello, My Name Is: sticker she handed back with it, Sy turned away, spotting the small wine station, also surrounded by numerous black sharpies. He headed over, scribbling Sy, on his sticker and poured himself a glass of some kind of red wine, before finding somewhere quiet to stand, to wait for the class to start.

As he stood there, sipping his wine and looking at a wall of finished clay figurines, cups and other knick knacks, he felt a pair of eyes on him. Clearing his throat, he glanced sideways, figuring you were checking him out, which he was more than fine with. But he discovered it was another woman giving him eye-candy. She was tall, with bleach-blonde hair and in a hot-pink tracksuit, she felt out of place for a pottery shop. Though, Sy knew he shouldn't be one to speak, standing there in a Lynyrd Skynyrd t-shirt, that had been to war with him, tight blue jeans, a pair of cowboy boots, with a black stetson cowboy hat.

The way she lifted her wine glass, however, suggested she wanted to jump his bones.

Which only amused the retired Army Captain.

“All right, ladies and gentleman!” Mini called, clapping her hands together and coming around the counter to regard her customers. “If we can all head towards the other end of the shop, where all the potter's wheels and everything are. We can start the class.” She smiled, motioning everyone to the back.

Everyone moved to the back in a messy, single-file line, still sipping the rest of their wine and chatting with each other. The woman in the pink tracksuit lagging back to walk with Sy, fluttering her lashes at him.

“Ma'am.” He acknowledged her, touching the brim of his hat, but didn't give her much else.

“What's a man like you doing in a pottery class?” She asked, biting the corner of her lip.

Sy licked his lips. “I got nothing better to do.” He said, not willing to admit the real reason he was there to her.

“I'm sure a big, strong, handsome man like you could find something to do.” She insinuated, fluttering her lashes at him.

“Pottery is just fine, thanks.” Sy replied, offering her a weak smile.

“Everyone, please find a pottery wheel and it doesn't matter which one.” Mini said, motioning to the dozen or so pottery wheels in a circle, a round lump of clay already waiting on them to be shaped.

Sy waited until almost everyone was seated, not wanting to take the chance of getting stuck sitting next to the woman hitting on him, far from that mood tonight. So, taking up a pottery wheel and grabbing the provided apron, he took off his hat and set it on a shelf behind his wheel, and slipped on the apron. Sy chuckled, sitting down on the comically small stool before the wheel, as he balanced his large, muscular body on it, smirking up at the rest of the group; seeing some of them sit on the stool like they'd done it a million times and others wobble.

“The first thing we're going to do, before we start shaping our clay,” Mini began explaining, sitting at wheel herself, apron on and perched on her stool, like the forty-plus year pottery maker she was. “is to assign our first timers, helpers. I will be giving instructions and so forth, but your helper will be there for you, just in case you need a refresher or get frustrated.” She told the group, looking around at everyone. “But just remember, just like us, human beings, we are all unique and beautiful. It doesn't matter how many times your clay refuses to shape into what your mind's eye thinks it should, or tears apart, or even if it doesn't bake right in the kiln. It is still beautiful! You still brought it into this world with your own two hands, and you should be proud of that. Because it's something no one else in this room did.”

Sy blinked at her, slightly taken aback by her statement. So used to Army instructors drilling into him about, if it's not perfect, you're dead or your buddy next to you, is.

“So, helpers, I'll let you pick your person. You've all worked here before, so you know how to identify them.”

“And how do you do that?” Someone blurted out, making Mini and the helpers chuckle.

“Well, that's one way for us to find you.” One of the helpers quipped in an Australian accent, moving across the room to said person. “But, it's the name tags, mate, or Ryan, I should say.” He smirked, offering out his hand to the newcomer. “I'm Joel.”

“Those of us here that don't have a name tag, are old pros.” Mini smiled, resting her forearms on the edge of her potter's wheel, while the rest of the helpers spread out.

“Good to see you made it all the way into the building.”

Sy looked over his shoulder and grinned up at you. “Yeah, I had a little bit of help.” He replied, glad, and a bit surprised, to see you were one of the helpers.

“Well, you're about to get some more help.” You said, glancing at his name tag. “Sy.”

He felt a lump lodge in his throat as you said his name. “That's great.” He rasped back. “I'm going to need it. These hands have only known how to do one thing, for the last twenty years.” He told you, holding up his calloused mitts.

“Oh, you got good hands for clay shaping.” You said, taking one of them in both of yours. “I'm sure we can teach these pups a new trick or two.”

“Can you teach this ol' pup any?” Sy asked, smiling at you.

“I might.” You nodded, pulling a stool up beside him. “Let's listen to Mini first, then we can find out what you want to make that clay into.” You told him, giving him an encouraging smile, that cracked open the door to a place he had tried to keep shut.

“Everyone have their partner?” Mini asked, looking around, then nodded. “Good! Now, you're going to learn your proper posture for molding.” She began, leaning forward and started her instruction for the next several minutes.

“Christ, I don't know if I can remember all that.” Sy said, blowing out a breath and shaking his head at his mound of clay. “I'm just a simple country boy, fresh out of the Army.”

You giggled beside him, lightly patting him on the back. “That's why you got me.” You reminded him, sweetly. “Now, what do you want to make? And, I swear if you say a dildo, I will get up and leave.” You warned him, seriously.

“Have people actually asked you that?” He frowned, cocking his head at you.

“Yes, more often than you might think.” You huffed, shaking your head. “I'll make anything else though.”

“To be honest with you,” Sy started, frowning down at the clay and shaking his head. “I don't know what to make. I've never been the artistic type. I always failed art class back in school.”

“Well, that's the wonder of art, and clay for that matter, Sy.” You told him, softly. “You can make whatever you want. You don't need to be artsy for it. What's the first thing that comes to your mind? Anything at all.”

“My dog.” He blurted out, biting his lip, feeling silly for it.

“All right, what about a dog bowl?” You suggested, tossing out the first dog related thing that came to your mind.

“Could we make a bowl?” Sy asked, looking over at you.

“Absolutely!” You nodded, grinning. “If you wanna make a bowl for your doggo, then we'll make one. I'll use all ten years of my clay making experience to help.”

“All right, a bowl for Aika, it is.” Sy nodded back, inspired.

“That's a sweet name.” You commented, watching Sy position himself, much as Mini instructed, then drizzle a little bit of water onto the clay and cup it in his large hands, almost hiding it completely in his palms as he started to work the wheel with his foot. “Good, that's a great speed. Keep it up. Little less pressure though.” You reminded him, watching the clay start to pancake a bit.

“Sorry.” He apologized, letting off on it.

“You're all right.” You answered, shaking your head. “So, what made you try out pottery?” You asked, reaching out, instinctively, to add a little more water.

Sy was quiet for a long moment, playing with and shaping his clay, watching the thick residue from it cover his fingers and palms. While trying to find a way to answer. He could give you the same answer he'd given the pink tracksuit lady or he could be honest. Spying you from the corner of his eye, he noticed you weren't waiting for a reply, not being pushy or intrusive. You had simply asked him the question and given him the space to answer it, when and if he wanted to with no hard feelings.

It was a breath of fresh air to him, just like feeling the wet clay in his hands. Knowing he was creating something, not harming it.

“I was hoping it would help me,” He finally answered you, licking his lips, deciding to be honest. “With my combat PTSD.” He added softer, waiting for your reaction.

“It can be quite calming.” You admitted, no ill reaction on your face. “It can also be rather frustrating.” You chuckled, with a smirk. “I about tossed the piece I was working on this morning, when one of the sides collapsed on me. I'd only been working on it for six hours.”

“Six hours!” Sy exclaimed, sitting back to look at you more steadily.

“You suffer for the art sometimes.” You told him, with amusement at his expression. “But, it's well worth it in the end. Most of the time, at least.”

“Christ, I hope this doesn't take that long.” He said, looking down at the weirdly shaped, almost oblong bit of clay on his wheel.

You looked around the room, before leaning close to Sy. “I think you're wonderful, Oda Mae.” You whispered into his ear, so none of your friends could hear you, knowing the complaints they'd give you for the reference after the class.

A huge smile crossed Sy's face and he howled with laughter, catching everyone's attention.

“I crack a good joke, we all know it!” You told them, grinning with guilt.

“I like you.” Sy said, once everyone's attention went back to their own station. “You're the first person that's made me laugh, like that, since I came home on retirement from the Army. A year ago.”

“Oh yeah?” You grinned, feeling a hot rush through your body that wasn't the glass of wine you had earlier. “Well, if you think I can crack a good joke, you'll see how good of a pottery teacher I am.”

“You take any students?” Sy blurted out, before he knew what he was thinking.

You floundered, mouth hanging open. “Um, no.” You admitted, shocked he'd asked, then saw the light start to fade in his blue eyes. “But I could consider it.” You said, quickly. “Especially if it helps you cope with your PTSD.”

“I think it just might.” He proclaimed, finding himself smitten with both pottery and you.

You laughed, throwing up your arm as Sy flicked the wet clay on his fingers at you. “Austin!” You tried to duck the mucky droplets as they splattered all over your apron, the side of your arm, face and hair, still giggling.

“You were looking a bit dry over there!” He guffawed, grinning at you. “What the heck, are you shapin', anyhow?” He asked, balancing himself back on his stool and eyeing your kaolin clay, seeing the strange, cup-like shape you had going.

“I don't really know.” You sighed, shrugging your shoulders at the grayish-yellow clay before you. “I'm just trying to understand it, and make something. That will hopefully not crack in the kiln. If I ever get around to firing it.” You told him, leaning forward again, feeling the soreness in your lower spine and forearms from working in that position for so long. “What about you?” You asked, cocking a brow at Sy, without looking away from what you were starting to consider your Frankenstein.

“Another ceramic grenade cup.” You smirked, curving your thumb into the center of the clay. “Or, what was that tea pot you made?” You asked, giggling as you recalled pulling the craft out of the kiln.

“I don't want to talk about it.” Sy replied, sounding disgruntled.

You laughed, nodding your head. “That's right, it was supposed to be a turt—Austin!” You shrieked, as his big, wet clay covered mitt swiped across your face. “Oh my god!”

“It was nothing, woman.” He huffed at you, with mischievous eyes, as he sat back down. “But I do have a question for you, babe.”

“Oh?” You replied, standing up to wipe the streak off your face before it dried.

“I was thinking,” He paused for a moment, chewing on his bottom lip as he continued to work his clay. “I still have a large chunk of my retirement payment from the Army, just sitting in my bank account.” He said, scowling as one side of the clay started to collapse.

“All right.” You nodded, staring down at him, as you stood between your two pottery wheels in the garage of Sy's house, situated on the ten acres he owned.

“I've been considering,” He licked his lips and sat back, to look up at you, wanting to see your face when he said aloud what had been on his mind for the last year and a half. “I want to open up my own shop.”

You blinked at him a couple times, processing his words. “Your own pottery shop?” You asked for clarification.

“Yeah, I want to open a pottery barn, to help Vets, like myself. Hell, to help anyone with PTSD or trauma. It helped me through so many nights of episodes and flashbacks.” He explained to you, babbling out the idea that had been swirling around him, and looked back up. “You helped me.” He whispered quietly, before shaking his head and squeezing the clay on his wheel.

“It's a stupid idea.”

Watching him destroy the piece he'd just spent the last hour and a half working on, stung you, but it hurt you more to hear him say his idea was stupid. You thought it was incredible. That it was so thoughtful and sweet of him to want to share a hobby that had given him so much in the last two years.

You were flattered to be a part of that journey with him, as well.

Your big bear.

“I think it's a terribly-” You sat down in his lap, wrapping your arms around his neck. “good idea, Austin Syverson.” You declared, kissing him lovingly. “And if I hear anyone say otherwise, I'll pelt them with wet clay, until they think it is.”

A bright smile pulled across Sy's face as he rested his chin on your shoulder. “So, you'll come be my first employee?” He asked, nosing the side of your neck, smelling your perfume mixed with the earthy scents of pottery, tinged with a light sheen of sweat from how warm it was in the garage.

“Oh, I'm going to work for you, am I?” You cooed, amused. “What position, do I get?”

“Hmm.” He hummed, pressing his lips to your skin. “How about the head of pottery?”

“What's your job going to be?” You asked, eyes fluttering shut.

“I'm the boss.” He chuckled, tugging on your ear. “I'll have a bunch of jobs. But there's no one I trust more than you, with all your infinite wisdom of pottery, to run that area.” He told you, his hands pushing under your tank top. “I do only have two years of experience, compared to your thirteen.”

“Oh, laying it on thicker than a glaze, Captain.” You purred, feeling his fingers leave trails of drying clay on the skin of your back. “But I do like the sound of it. Do I get to boss you around during classes?” You asked, cupping the back of his head in your palm and rubbing the short hair there with your thumb, while your other hand dripped to the strings of his camouflage apron.

Sy smirked, giving your neck a sharp bite and making you gasp. “You boss me around already.”

“I do not!” You huffed, with an amused flash in your eyes, pushing his head back to look up at you.

“Whatever you say, my darling.” He replied, blue eyes sparkling.

“That's what I thought.” You smirked, kissing the bridge of his nose.

Pulling his hands from your tank top and gripping you by the hips, Sy pushed you up and pulled your legs across his lap, so you straddled him. You moaned at the straining bulge in his black sweatpants, pressing down against it through your short-shorts, sucking lightly on your bottom lip.

“What are we calling your little pottery business?” You hummed, reaching between your bodies to slip into the waistband of his sweats, finding his thick manhood and gliding your hand along it, drawing out a shivering sigh out from him.

“I don't know.” He rasped, clawing at your hips and the band of your shorts, leaving red marks in their wake. “Maybe, Sy's Therapy Barn or something.” He puffed, losing focus on the idea of running a business and growing more interested in tearing your shorts and underwear off.

“I like it.” You nodded, slipping off his lap, smiling at his hands grabbing to bring you back, but stood and took your shorts and panties off, before straddling his thick thighs again. “Rolls of the tongue and easy to remember.” You told him, taking his burning shaft in your hand, stroking him firmly as you guided him towards your glistening entrance.

“Mmhm.” Sy mumbled, his mouth latching onto your collarbone. “Whatever you say, babe.”

You chuckled, caressing your free hand over his head and gripped his shoulder, using it as leverage to sink down onto him, with a soft sigh and leaning forward to rest your forehead against his.

“I love you, Syverson.”

“Ditto.” He rumbled back, wrapping his arms around you and locking you against him.

“Welcome to Sy's Therapy Barn!” You grinned as a man came through the door, the bell above it chiming through the building, his ripped muscles making the fabric of his Under Armor shirt scream, his tattooed arms showing below the short sleeves. “Are you here for the classes or to look about?” You asked, motioning around the grand shop with beaming pride.

You and Sy had found a thousand square foot warehouse, filling it with all your pottery and therapy needs and dreams. Sy had even decided to go to school and become a licensed therapist, allowing him to help the people coming into the Therapy Barn better. While they got their hands cupped around the little mounds of clay, during your classes, so they could shape it into whatever their minds wanted or needed.

Part of the warehouse was set up with kilns of all sizes and kinds, tall and wide shelves to hold pour molds and drying creations. While another section was where you and Sy held the classes for the therapy groups, either for former or active Combat Service people or, those who Sy referred to as Regulars, members of the public who hadn't served. All of them there to try and remedy their PTSD, trauma, depression, loss, domestic violence or anything else along those lines.

People that didn't require therapy were also welcome, of course.

But the two of you catered to those in need specifically, and so far, business was booming. Sy had gone to the several local Veteran Centers in the Dallas area with fliers promoting the business's program, as well as the VFW Canteens and posting on the internet. Even calling some of his old comrades. Sy had been worried and a bit skeptical with your first pottery class, sure that no one was going to show up to it. However, when the time rolled around, the bell above the front door started dinging with customers, most of them were middle aged or elderly, but there were several your and Sy's age, looking apprehensive.

It made you smile to see that look on their face, it was the exact expression you'd seen on Sy's face, that night you met in the parking lot of Mini's Pottery Barn, before he discovered the magic of forming clay. You always looked forward to seeing it change into the wonder of how amazing it is, to see your brave Captain use his fresh Bachelor's Degree to help them work through the same struggles he had. The struggles you had woken up at one or two in the morning, to find Sy in the garage, in nothing, but the shorts he'd gone to bed in, hunched over his pottery wheel, his muscles tight and teeth gritted, but his hands cupped gently around the piece of clay he was working. Trying to chase away whatever he had been awoken by.

“I'm here for the class, with Dr. Syverson.” He replied, looking around uneasily, like he expected a bomb to go off in one of the teapots you'd crafted and had on sale in the front window of the shop.

“That's great!” You grinned at him, trying to be open and encouraging towards him. “The class will start in ten minutes. You can either take a seat or have a look around. There's coffee, tea and water on the table with some cupcakes and snicker-doodle cookies, so help yourself.”

“No booze.” He mumbled, eyeing the table.

“No,” You answered, giving him an emphatic look. “Some of our potter's are recovering and sober, so we don't offer it.” You explained to him, glancing over at one of your regulars with a nod. “To repress the urge to relapse.”

He looked at you for a moment. “That's—actually, very thoughtful of you.” He said, blinking as it came over him.

“We do our best.” Sy said, appearing from the back. “Pleasure to meet ya.” He offered his hand to the other man. “Captain Syverson, 1st battalion, 3rd SFG(a). Also Dr. Austin Syverson, the co-owner of this here Therapy Barn.” He introduced himself, always giving his classifications to the Vets, knowing how at ease it made them and started that thread of a bond with him.

“Pleasure to meet you, Captain.” He replied, shaking Sy's hand. “Lieutenant Daniel Burton, 3rd recon battalion, for the Marines.”

“Well, it's good to meet you, Lieutenant.” Sy nodded, then smiled over at you, his hand moving to rest on the small of your back. “I'm sure my fiancee has given you the introduction to our business.”

“That she has.” Daniel nodded, giving you a kind smile. “Though, I'll admit, I'm a little apprehensive as to how this is going to help me get straightened out. I watched some videos on pottery on Youtube and it just doesn't seem like much.”

You and Sy looked at each other, a smile and knowing look on each other's faces.

“It seems that way. I thought the same thing, myself, at first.” Sy confessed, a winking at you. “But, all you have to do is take all your emotions. All your pain, all your love, all your passion and all your rage and work it into that bit of clay we give you on that pottery wheel and the rest comes with it.”

You looked at Sy, it had become a thing between the two of you, and in doing so, that line had become his motto. It had become part of the business's motto, and few people actually caught the reference. But that was all right. The two of you still got through to people in the end. Saving them from their dark past through horrible movie quotes, a man that took a chance on a hobby and your skill with moving clay, sculpting a life and a business out of it.

[jgroffdaily]

A video of the full panel is available at the link, including an edited transcript. Some quotes:

A decade ago, in a very different San Francisco and a very different television landscape, Patrick Murray and his friends first stumbled onto HBO — literally, the pilot starts with Jonathan Groff ineptly cruising in a public park. Looking was a low-key, intentionally under-glamorous depiction of the lives of a few gay male friends played by Groff, future White Lotus employee Murray Bartlett, and Frankie J. Alvarez, as well as their token straight-woman-friend Doris (Lauren Weedman) and Patrick’s pair of love interests, played by Raúl Castillo and Russell Tovey. Created by Michael Lannan with the close involvement of director Andrew Haigh (of All of Us Strangers), Looking intentionally tacked away from the soap-operatics of gay dramas like the American Queer As Folk while still wrestling with the hot topics of gay life during the second Obama administration: PrEP, Grindr, marriage equality. In its two-season run plus a wrap-up film, the show was never a ratings smash — its time slot, right next to Girls, may have led some audiences to expect satire where Looking bent toward sweet earnestness — though it became the subject of furious discussion on social media, perhaps also a novel dynamic at the time. Looking lives on as a cult favorite, discovered and revisited by new fans online, and it remains a beloved project for its cast and crew.

Jonathan Groff: I auditioned in L.A. I had seen Weekend, and I was a puddle after that movie was over. I was so blown away and had never seen a gay movie or show that felt so relatable. And then when I heard the director of that was directing this pilot, I got really excited. It was the scene with Richie when he’s hitting on Patrick on the train in the pilot. I remember blushing for real, because until that moment in that room, I had never actually played “gay” in that way before, and it was such a confronting, scary, exciting experience. I was like, Whoa. I felt actually hot.

Frankie Alvarez: That’s because you weren’t playing, you were revealing.

J.G.: Yeah, exactly! I kind of left on a high from that audition. It felt a little scary to … It’s one thing to be out, but then it’s another thing to, like, douche on-camera. [Laughs] And it’s like, “Wow, I guess if I do this show, it’s really like G-A-Y across my forehead.” At that time, there was this notion that if you were gay and you played gay, that was all that you were going to be able to do. But I felt it so deeply that I ended up not caring as much about that and wanting to play the role.

F.A.: That reminds me of a story. When you came out to your parents, you told your mom, “I’m never gonna be the grand marshal at the Gay Pride Parade.”

J.G.: And then we were in the Pride Parade together! I came out in 2009, and by 2013, we were at the front of the parade!

John Hoffman: …That whole first season was magic. Michael and Andrew were so open and kind and generous. And then I made Jonathan douche! I wanted everyone to get naked more! I was the one in the room going, “Guys, we need more people watching, so everybody has to be naked a lot more and having more sex!”

Lauren Weedman: If you’ve got an ass, get a fork! We’re eating!

Michael Lannan: Well, when I was rewatching it recently, I was like, “Man, there’s a lot of desire and kissing and sex!” I was like, “Oh my God, we did that!”

J.H.: Everywhere I could! Although, I later became friends with Shirley MacLaine, who’s now 90-something. I got her to watch Looking, and she said, “That is quite a show. I really enjoyed it. One note — too much kissing.” [Laughs]

L.W.: No kissing, just fucking. Is that the show’s point?

F.A.: Straight to the bottom-ing!

In an oral history about the show, one of the things that came up, alongside John being the one who really wanted douching onscreen, was how much the characters started to mold around the actors. I think one of you said, “We didn’t want to tell too much to Michael and Andrew because it might just appear onscreen.” Did you feel the sense of these characters becoming expressions of yourselves?

J.G.: To me, almost to an embarrassing point. I was figuring it out as I went along and offering up vulnerable truths. I remember being in a diner with Andrew, and he was like, “Tell me about your last breakup” and then writing down in the notes for the fight for me and Kevin at the end of the season, where we’re moving in with each other. And then I got to act that out! And the boyfriend who it was kind of about was like, “Wow, okay, so … did you tell them about it?” It was a great gift. For the actors to offer up tidbits and whatever, and then to have the writers and the directors make it artfully a part of the story, it was incredible. It was like actual therapy.

L.W.: I remember we were at the Paley Center and people were getting up and going, “I don’t see myself represented!” I thought it was beautiful, because it mattered! There’s one little morsel out there of some show that maybe you have a chance to see yourself, and people are like, “I want to be seen on this!” Of course, I’m not the writer. Much worse to be the writer. [Laughs] The reaction — it felt like it really mattered.

J.G.: I was shocked to see our gentleness attacked in such an aggressive way by what people were typing. It made me, what you were saying, Lauren, feel like, Wow, I guess this is way more meaningful than I ever anticipated. That people are actually upset and angry and furious and bored, or whatever it was they were feeling that they felt they had to kind of shout it from the rooftops. It’s a testament to the point of view of Michael and Andrew that they held fast to what they wanted to do. They heard criticism and they applied it, but they didn’t change what the core of the show was. And I think that’s why we’re here, because you had such a specific point of view. It’s such a lesson in digging in and connecting to your truth, and not letting negative noise affect that. But it was so hard for you guys! I remember it was coming from every angle.

Do you have memories of favorite places you got to film in San Francisco? Especially in that moment in time, because that city has changed so much.

M.L.: We filmed Patrick and Richie dancing at the Stud, and they kiss at the exact spot where I had my first kiss. It was crazy and beautiful. When that happened, I was like, “Wow, this really is a simulation.”

J.G.: That’s the one that came to my mind, too, because I remember you being there, and I remember us dancing. It was so hot, by the way. Super-hot.

M.L.: Temperature-wise?

J.G.: No, sexual tension! [Laughs] It was in this cool gay bar in San Francisco, and I remember you saying to the director of that episode, “Please push the camera in,” because it was a faraway shot. It was like your heart and your soul knew that we gotta go in on this. I remember feeling that and feeling you and really feeling like, “Oh, wow, I’m inside of somebody’s brain and heart right now, and I’m with this guy.” It felt like an artistic, transcendent moment. It was such a special thing to be inside of your memory of your first kiss. You were channeling something. The storytelling thing was happening.

[catonator]

Funny heading to a blogpost on videogames that’s some sort of reference

Look, I already used the ctrl+alt+delete quote in a blogpost title. It’s February 2024, and it’s already a very wild year for gaming. We’ve had more layoffs than with the entirety of 2023, games shown off at events seem to be stagnating, interest in the art is waning. Youtube is filled with “modern gaming sucks” doomer blackpill videos. It’s a miserable time.

Is gaming just over?

Well, no. Of course not. The Sonic franchise has lingered for decades despite consistent failure. Games are more resilient than that.

Humanity’s relation to computing is still pretty fresh, and I’d say that despite the size and scale of a lot of it, we’re still going through major growing pains. Concepts like video games, the internet and special effects are still pretty new, despite being around for twice or thrice as long as most of the people reading this have been alive. Internal combustion engine -powered cars were invented in 1808, made mass produced in the 1910s, and even then it took until the 1950s for them to be common enough for the US government to bother designing cities around them. In the present day, many have come to resent the car-centric design mentality, even though the driving (no pun intended) factor behind them was mainly the same as with technology today: scientific and technological progression is unquestionably good, and therefore new and successful ideas should be pushed and relied upon as hard as possible. What could possibly go wrong?!

Video games are far from the only medium which is seeing similar problems. Movies have suffered greatly from a capeshit infestation, in which the abuse of VFX artists is valued over, you know, basics of good filmmaking, and the general public is clearly sick of it. On the internet, we’ve decided that megastructures like Twitter are better than forms of communication we’re good at, and it’s gone horribly wrong. We’re still learning the “do”s, “don’t”s and “who the fuck thought this was a good idea”s of tech.

Games as an artform are as alive as they ever were, but the sheer scale of the operations has grown to a point where nobody can really understand it. The numbers behind playerbases and the money traffic have so many zeroes that you can’t even fathom the number. Even if I used some metaphorical figure, like 20 000 cars. Shockingly, despite how console sales haven’t really increased in numbers (the top selling console of all time is still the PS2), most of the top-grossing games of all time are relatively recent. This implies that the behaviour of consumers has shifted from purchasing a variety of different kinds of games into purchasing fewer games of fewer different kinds. And I don’t think it’s a case of customers deciding to shift over naturally.

In the past decade or so, the gaming industry has decided sensible experiences are a way of the past, and the future is making games for debt and making back the money with horse armour and other garbage the general public doesn’t really want.

But we’ve seen this shit before. In the 90s, 3D was “the future”, and 2D pixel art or hand-drawn art in general seemed to go the way of the dodo for polygons and ““realism””. About a decade later, 2D art would see a resurgence and in some cases overtake the big lads in lasting impact. In the end, people crave personal stories, varying ideas, and interesting ways to tell them. Not much has changed since ancient Greeks, besides that the medium of storytelling has largely shifted from some guy standing on a stage, trying to explain another world, to electronic devices actually showing us the other worlds.

I think as we play out the Icarus stories in real time, we’ll also learn when boundaries are pushed too far, and the scale of the bullshit simply collapses in on itself. When that happens, the public is forced to step back and reevaluate the ways we thought were the future, and what really is better for all of us.

When a storm flattens a forest of dead, decrepit trees, the sun and rain can now reach the ground and cultivate a new generation of different plant life. Once hidden beneath the dead corpses, now able to grow and bloom in a way the old generation never could. You should just keep doing what you think is right. Now’s the time more than ever to be the backbone of a better industry, for many applications of tech, from games to communication. And it’s better, if the backbone comes from the grassroots, and isn’t defined by the megacorporations. Because those cunts will never learn from their failures.

[houseofbrat]

I don’t think Catherine is ever going to divorce William. She didn’t stick it out this long to not get a crown on her head and her family haven’t briefed the media for over a decade not to get some lesser titles from King Willy one day.

With this new reporting - do you believe she ever had anything related to cancer? I’ve always thought she had a breakdown of some kind and these latest reports just confirm that even more. Even if you had cancer, there’s zero reason not to be seen by anyone - which she hasn’t been.

And again, the entire fiasco shows what liars KP are. People want to forget the week of the video announcement, she did her bouncy shopping experience and Kp was calling in favors for people to talk about her doing school runs and being all over the school. How would that have been possible if she started “preventative chemo” the month before 🙄

[this ask is from 24 May 2024]

Perhaps this phrase is more apt: “Falsus in uno, falsus in omnibus.”

Or, perhaps, the right Benoit Blanc quote should be:

"A doughnut hole in the doughnut's hole. But we must look a little closer. And when we do, we see that the doughnut hole has a hole in its center. It is not a doughnut hole at all, but a smaller doughnut with its own hole, and our doughnut is not whole at all!"

Why was Kate's "planned abdominal surgery" and hospitalization announced in the afternoon of 17 January 2024? If her surgery had been "planned," then the pr plan for announcing it would more likely have been put into place prior to surgery or at least during surgery at the minimum. However, a full day and the following morning had passed by the time an announcement was made by the Kensington Palace comms team. By KP's own statement & timing, the surgery happened on the 16th, and yet by the following morning, they were still not ready to announce that Kate had had major surgery or would not be performing public duties in the near future for a lengthy period of time.

Why the delay?

If it was routine surgery--as KP comms team wants to suggest by their statement--then why not announce on the 16th? Kate would be staying in the hospital regardless of whether the announcement to the public was made on the 16th or 17th. However, the delay insinuates that it was NOT a routine or "planned" surgery that Kate had. Seemingly that William and the KP pr team were not prepared to handle the situation. That perhaps Concha Calleja was right in that either Kate's operation or immediate post-operative period did not go well.

But now Kensington Palace comms team is telling Becky English that Kate was "unwell for some time in the run up to her initial abdominal surgery." A detail that--if true--would have made perfect sense to reveal to the UK media back in January or as late as March of this year. However, KP's initial statement on 17 January said that Kate was not expected to be doing work until after Easter, which was 31 March this year. (And yes, regular royal watchers would know this includes the kids' Easter break, even though the general public would not.) Even still, the Easter deadline gave Kate two and a half months notice that she would not be in the public's eye.

If Kate was truly "unwell for some time in the run up to her initial abdominal surgery," then the medical team would have been aware of that prior to her hospital admission. The BRF has their own medical team, which includes doctors outside of medical facilities such as The London Clinic. These doctors would know Kate and her medical history quite well by this point. They would know very well how she would respond to certain kinds of treatments and procedures.

In late February, William misses or skips the memorial service for King Constantine II of Greece. According to Valentine Low, that decision may have been made two weeks earlier. However, this absence did not cause him to miss other engagements later on in the week, such as St. David's Day in Wales.

Nonetheless, a string of outrageous and undeniable pr failures are suddenly committed by the Kensington Palace comms team, which includes the release of an altered Mother's Day photo and a public spat with the British Army over the Colonel's Review. Will and Kate become an international joke with so many people rolling their eyes about the shenanigans coming out of Kensington Palace, until Kate makes her video announcement that "cancer had been present." All the questioning of Will, Kate, and Kensington Palace's leadership all stopped after that one announcement.

Until people saw the pictures of Kate at Trooping the Colour and then Wimbledon and realized she did not look so ill. Many people know someone who has or is undergoing treatment for cancer. Many people have to work while they undergo treatment for cancer.

And then there's the recent Nerf story about how Kate and the kids went to an outdoor party to run around and play in the mud. There are plenty of people, who do not idolize Kate, who have wizened up to the fact that she clearly does not seem ill. At all.

And let's not forget Benoit Blanc's quote up top:

"A doughnut hole in the doughnut's hole. But we must look a little closer. And when we do, we see that the doughnut hole has a hole in its center. It is not a doughnut hole at all, but a smaller doughnut with its own hole, and our doughnut is not whole at all!"

Many people have grabbed on to this situation in disbelief that Will & Kate are telling the truth. Rightfully so when you consider all the red flags. This is why so many people believe that Will & Kate are either getting divorced or separated.

However, what would be the reason for Will & Kate to separate or divorce? Many people speculate that the rumors between Will & Rose Hanbury are true, and William is planning on replacing Kate with Rose. However, that does not seem at all likely to me, as there has never been any substantiation at all to those rumors, even in a British or foreign tabloid. Also, I would suggest that it is unlikely William has the game to pull off an affair given that he gave Kate a pair of binoculars as a present when they were dating. It's unlikely that guy could manage the ins & outs of having an affair.

Whatever is the source of the problem(s) between Will & Kate, it didn't originate in 2024. It had to be something in 2023. What--or whom--is the issue at hand? That is the question.

I too believe Kate had a mental breakdown with subsequent self-harm. It does not make sense that she was "unwell for some time" when she looked perfectly fine at her last Christmas concert and on Christmas Day. The way KP released information and William acted in January does not support that they knew she was "unwell" for some unspecified period of time prior to her hospitalization.

I'd like to point out two articles from this year of likely relevance. First, Kate Mansey's article from mid-March, "Prince William is a team player — why can’t he work with King Charles?"

At Buckingham Palace –– the office of the King and Queen — some are beginning to feel that the heir to the throne might do well to join forces with his father. Instead, Buckingham Palace and Kensington Palace are run as two very separate and distinct entities. The first step towards better collaboration between the two courts, it is suggested, is for the heir to the throne to keep the sovereign better informed of his plans. This might be seen to be particularly prudent while the 75-year-old King is following medical advice to stay away from large public appearances while he continues his cancer treatment. [...] It means that Charles has no appetite to attempt to meddle in his son’s decisions, particularly as they both have very different approaches to the job.

The second from The Daily Mail's pearl-clutcher-in-chief, Richard Eden.

When I later spoke to the friend of Prince William, I had hoped that he would bring news of a change to this uninspiring policy. However, what he told me left me worried about the future of the monarchy. The friend said William was in 'full agreement' with his father about the need for a 'slimmed-down monarchy'. He told me: 'When the older members of the family retire, His Royal Highness won't be inviting anyone else to become working royals. It remains to be seen if he will even want his two younger children to be working royals.' At 59, the Duchess of Edinburgh is the only other member of 'The Firm' under the age of 60. This means that by the time William ascends the throne, he and Catherine may be the only full-time royals. 'That is what William wants,' the source claims. 'He sees the small European monarchies as the model for the future.' However, when King Charles made his plans for a 'slimmed-down monarchy', Prince Harry was a key part of them.

Interesting that we didn't hear about William's plans when his grandmother was alive. Or that we still get public photos of Charlotte and Louis for their birthdays, if William is truly not going to have them be working royals as adults. Interesting all the changes he's making tend to be hidden, such as saying he paid taxes when he offered no proof, now that he is the heir to the throne and is his own boss.

[viktoriamagrey]

The definitive end of the series will always be ACiT. It feels very satisfying; a proper finish to a sequel trilogy (well, tetralogy by technicality in both cases) that embraces its new, more "Pixar film" identity and the advantages it has fully without going too far in the other direction. To this day, you see people vastly over-utilize the ACiT cutscenes in video editing over any other game in the series, and its aesthetic in fan works because the art style hits all the right notes; it's Ratchet, just older. Save for the bloom, the environmental design and character models are still incredibly solid for 2009. But, worth noting to me... The ending is, quite literally, a direct parallel to the end of the first game, only now it is Clank who is learning a sort of opposite lesson to what Ratchet had to learn: that duty is not everything, and that sometimes, it's okay to think for yourself and choose your own path. Ratchet lets go for the greater good like he's learned to, and Clank holds on to him because he wants to support the person he's become. It's poetic, and it leads to one of the best quotes in the entire series; one of my all-time favorite quotes.

I remember reading that at the time, ACiT was the end. And I think, on some level, Insomniac knew it was over for good, too, even after changing their mind and revisiting the world. The next Ratchet games are experimental pieces, and the only real attempt to give an epilogue was Into The Nexus, which only left the door slightly ajar but not really open. It's one of my favorite Ratchet games, but absolutely not "necessary".

The tragedy of a series like R&C is that it's kind of doomed by its own popularity. It's obvious that Insomniac Games largely would be okay letting it go, but they really can't. It's good to have "stable" IPs! It's their most iconic series besides Spyro (that they literally made Ratchet and Clank after losing the rights to), and to this day, practically always, there will be a lot of people both old and new asking when the next Ratchet game is coming out.

I am a diehard Ratchet and Clank fan. It's hard to find someone more viscerally attached to this series, and the joy I get from just thinking about it almost makes me wish for a brain scan. For the record, I've been into this series since its twelfth anniversary, which was already twelve years ago; It was three days before my ninth birthday. It's one of the reasons I fell in love with videogames, I was one of the only people to watch the movie in theaters (twice) when it was released in my country despite an astounding lack of fans, I've played every single game both in and out of emulators (including the mobile game), I have action figures, I sold oil paintings as a kid just to buy a PS3 ten years ago, and even sold that later partially to play on PS4.

But honestly, I just... Don't fully vibe with the series' direction anymore because it is so abundantly clear that, even when it's well-done, it's just kind of aimless. Rift Apart is probably one of the best sequels to Into The Nexus we could have gotten, but even that has the we-can't-actually-do-that-because-it-would-end-this-plot-thread-and-what-if-sequels flu.

I just think it says a lot, when the newest Ratchet and Clank games we have gotten are literally a remake (a failed attempt to revitalize the franchise), and a game where they go to another dimension to find alternate counterparts of the main characters. It just screams "I'm trying to make this interesting to write about again/bring people into this that haven't been here for at least a decade". It also features that good old "retirement" thing we've had since A4O. I'm starting to think that is projecting for the entire franchise...

[eziojensenthe3rd]

Midnight Gaming: Long Live Eggbug

So last night I played Atari 50th anniversary collection, checked socials later to find.... cohost will shut down by the end of the year... aww..

So Atari is a company thats been around for a long while in the gaming industry, all the way back in the 70's with pong and asteroids, leading to the atari 2600 or vcs as it was called and finally leading to thier last console, the atari jaguar which flopped hard. It was a console that was advertised as a true 64 bit console even though it was really just 2 custom 32 bit processors, making it difficult to make games that run well, in the same decade that has the playstation and the nintendo 64. Yeah, "do the math".

Never really got to experience much of Atari when they were a contender in the scene, heck I wasn't even a year old when the Jaguar was launched so it wasn't really a part of gaming that I had a hands on experience with but I have heard of them. In my general interest in all things gaming in my youth, Atari was brought up sometimes in some gaming mags and online media, AVGN is probably for many people how they heard about Atari as he covered some games on the 2600, even did an episode on the failed 5200 and the Jaguar consoles.

So Digital Eclipse (not to be confused with digital extremes, the warframe folks) has done a 50th anniversary collection that has various games from atari's history, including some unreleased games. Naturally since these games can be easily emulated, a collection of old games wouldnt mean much but theres more to this than just that. You also get a bunch supplemental material such as artwork, behind the scenes documents and videos of interviews with several employees and key figures in atari's history, talking about various things. Cliffy B is there too for some reason.

For me its damn fascinating to follow along a timeline of events, looking at various media and playing some games, getting a feel on Atari's journey over the years. You do learn a few things about the company and how it ran at the time and uhhh.. it certanly looks a bit familiar. Developers having to work overtime, upper management ignoring concerns from thier employees, games being marketed beyond what could actually be delivered leading to consumer backlash, employees losing their jobs in mass. Yeah those problems are still around nowadays huh. 50 years later and nobody has really learnt anything, still making the same mistakes that one time led to the most infamous market crashes in history. Funny thing tho, while the games market did indeed crash in 83, leading to several businesses going bankrupt, for the average 2600 player it was just an odd time in which new 2600 games werent made. Because the 2600 had such a massive install base, eventually new 2600 games got made again, even during the time when the Sega Master System and the Nintendo Entertainment System were leading the console scene. To quote one Garry Kitchen "No one told consumers that there had been a crash. No one went to their house and said "You don't like video games anymore"".

Digital Eclipse also did some other games in the documentary style, the art of karateka and llamasoft. I wouldn't mind checking those out as I feel a documentary that covers a particular subject sounds fascinating to put the lenses of an interactive game, though I suppose it does veer a bit close to "edutainment" territory.

So now with that done, lets move onto the.... news. Cohost is announced to be closing down at the end of year with it converting to a read only format in October. I genuinly enjoyed my time on cohost even if it was short. From looking for alternatives to Tumblr, I stumbled onto it and found a chill sort of site that I felt comfortable browsing, chatting with peeps and sharing posts. It was a site that had an independent vibe that was unique and humble compared to some of its contemporaries. Tumblr weared the mask of being queer friendly despite nuking the odd trans blog every now and then, twitter is a cesspit run by that nepobaby bastard, discord seems to have issues with power tripping mods and creeps. A lot of social media seems to either be.full of techbro crypto ai weirdos or algorithmic data-harvesting software or both! But cohost had the vision of a place that didnt had user-unfriendly practices, instead of just making a site that demands engagement from the user for the sake of profit, the team made the site comfortable to browse and post on, letting people build up communities to hang out and chill in. Sadly that ambition wasnt sustainable due to the issues with both work and finance and in the end, it'll all be shut down.

I'll still be posting Midnight Gaming on Cohost until October as well as on tumblr until I find another site to host this series. Maybe I'll try that dreamwidth place I heard about, maybe i'll actually make a neocities site. We'll see what the future holds.

Until then, Rest in Piece Cohost. Hug your local eggbug today.... oh yeah james earl jones passed away too... awful lot of death lately, an old friend on my fathers side recently lost thier wife too. September what the hell you doing?

Hey whatever happened to those prizes that were won during the Swordquest contest?

Thats all for today, see you tomorrow. Feel free to leave any game suggestions or feedbacks. Anons are currently on.

[mr-double-downer]

"why's re there so many gay porn memes today" - dude gachimuchi was at its peak 10 years ago, i still quote the bad gay porn acting video over a decade later

people fucking love ram ranch too

it’s just funny I guess

[racingtoaredlight]

Improvement Later in Life

Highly recommend just letting this roll in the background during the day. It's fucking tremendous. Just fucking tremendous.

Specifically, the guitarist Anthony Wilson and the bassist Bob Hurst. I've had the pleasure of meeting Bob Hurst back in the day, and he's just awesome. I'm not sure if he's still the head of the jazz department at Michigan, but I'm pretty sure he at least still teaches bass there.

Wilson...trust me, there's gonna be more on him coming. I just need to listen more. He's fucking unbelievable.

But this post is about Diana Krall.

Krall has somewhat of a mixed reputation in the jazz world...that actually should've said "had" because she's done an increidble amount of work to successfully shut people up over the years. Will she ever be confused for Keith Jarrett? No. Will she ever be confused for Ella Fitzgerald? No*.

*There's a woman I've been listening to named Marina Pacowski, who is a classically trained pianist and unbelievable singer tho that can kinda live up to that. She's great too.

But I've been listening to Krall's stuff the past two weeks and her improvement over the years is shocking. She's been a "jazz star" for decades now...and it actually feels silly putting that in quotes, considering she's one of the few jazz musicians that can pack theaters and large halls year after year after year.

If there were any complaints about the quality of her musicianship, there have never been any of those levied towards her work as a bandleader...which has been exceptional since day 1. Her band is one of the jazz guitar's coveted positions...steady, high profile and well paying. It's no coincidence that she's had Wilson (at top) and Russell Malone (below) as her second in command since the turn of the century.

But this post isn't about guitarists...it's about Krall's steady, consistent improvement in her own skillset.

Below I'm going to queue these two videos up to one her her solos...one from 1996 and the other from 2022. Just listen to how much she's improved over these years, and how much more advanced her melodic playing is now than it was back then.

We're talking an already established music star back in 1996. She's already packing theaters at this point...she didn't really have to put in the work. But once you compare the two, you'll see she absolutely did, and continues to do so.

The 2022 example, I actually started a bit earlier. Pay attention to her comping. She has been putting in the hours and sounds like goddamned McCoy Tyner backing up Coltrane. Fuck yes.

In the 2022 example, Wilson lays down just a goddamned great solo...something great enough that it'd take something extra to follow that shit up. If you listened to her critics, you'd think her take might be a let down...

Instead they kick it into double time, and she just RIPS. No qualifiers, no "she's a better bandleader than musician" backhanded compliments...just a ripping solo in the pocket the entire time. 4:00-5:16 is straight up owning it.

She's been working for years with teachers Alan Broadbent and Jimmy Rowles, and...I mean, shit...it's pretty obvious the improvement's been significant. It's not like she was bad before...it's just now she's a pianist that's really got a whole lot working, adding another dimension to a musical recipe that's been packing houses for decades now.

It's really incredible shit to see someone hit the ground running at the beginning of their career, refuse to rest on their laurels, and despite already being at the top of their profession, they continue to grind and work and get better.

You do see this typically with psychos that are hardwired to keep pushing themselves. People who started early on and don't understand anything more than putting the pedal to the metal. But for someone later in life, who already had an established working career, to put that work in and watch it pay off is fucking great. It's inspiring as hell.

You want to know why she always has the best bands? It's not because she's a premier virtuoso...it's because she's leading the band, doing arrangements, singing, and still putting in the practice to become more dynamic, a more able musician. Like I said, it's inspiring as hell.

[cyberbenb]

Ukraine war latest: US close to making decision on ATACMS, Kyiv says

Key developments on July 14:

Yermak: US ‘very close’ to making a decision on ATACMS missiles for Ukraine

Erdogan says he and Putin ‘of the same mind’ on grain deal extension, Moscow denies

Ukrainian military report advancing in directions of Melitopol, Bakhmut

Ukraine returns bodies of 62 fallen soldiers

President’s Office Head Andrii Yermak told journalists on July 14 that the U.S. is “very close” to deciding whether to provide Ukraine with long-range ATACMS missiles.

According to Yermak, he’s in good contact with U.S. National Security Advisor Jake Sullivan and is well aware of the decision-making process.

President Volodymyr Zelensky discussed the provision of ATACMS with his American counterpart at the Vilnius NATO summit on July 12.

“There are such conversations, but there is no decision” on the issue of ATACMS yet, Zelensky said at a press conference.

Washington has been reluctant to supply ATACMS due to the fear of escalation and the concerns that they may be used to attack Russian territory.

Supporters of providing ATACMS argue that Kyiv’s inability to strike targets far from the front line results in the deaths of numerous Ukrainians and makes it very difficult for Ukraine to expel Russian troops from its territory.

On July 12, U.S. President Joe Biden confirmed that Washington was considering supplying the long-requested missiles to Ukraine.

However, Biden told Bloomberg that artillery ammunition was a more urgent need for Ukraine as the country already possesses weapons systems similar to ATACMS, likely referring to the SCALP long-range missiles pledged by France at the latest NATO summit and the U.K.-provided Storm Shadow missiles, in use by the Ukrainian military since May.

This Week in Ukraine Ep. 16 – Why is Ukraine still not in NATO?

Episode #16 of our weekly video podcast “This Week in Ukraine” is dedicated to Ukrainian culture, the important role it plays in war, and why it has been a target of Russian dictators for decades. Host Anastasiia Lapatina is joined by the Kyiv Independent’s culture reporter Oleksiy Sorokin. Listen…

The Kyiv IndependentAnastasiia Lapatina

Grain deal in limbo

Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan said on July 14 he and Russian President Vladimir Putin were “of the same mind” on the extension of the Black Sea Grain Initiative.

"(UN Secretary-General Antonio) Guterres sent a letter to Putin. I hope that with this letter, we assure the extension of the grain corridor deal with the joint efforts of us and Russia," Erdogan told reporters, as quoted by the Turkish state-run Anadolu news outlet.

Moscow denied Erdogan’s claims later in the day, with Kremlin spokesman Dmitry Peskov saying that Russia didn’t make any statements about agreeing to prolong the Black Sea Grain Initiative that allows Ukraine to continue exporting its agricultural products.

The current agreed-upon extension period is set to expire on July 17.

Russia has already threatened not to prolong the Black Sea Grain Initiative unless the West eases its restrictions against its grain and fertilizers exports.

According to the Russian state-controlled news agency Interfax, Putin claimed that none of Moscow’s conditions for extending the deal — which focus on logistics, insurance, and money movement when paying for Russian products — had been met.

Russia’s key demand, however, is reconnecting the Kremlin-owned Russian Agricultural Bank to the SWIFT international payment system. The bank was cut from the payment system on June 14 over the full-scale invasion of Ukraine.

Unnamed sources told Reuters and the Financial Times that the EU was not considering removing that restriction but is weighing an option to connect a subsidiary of Russia’s Agricultural Bank to SWIFT.

Guterres reportedly asked Putin to extend the grain deal for several months to give the EU time to arrange the scheme.

Turkey and the UN brokered the grain deal in July 2022.

Russia’s all-out war initially prevented Ukraine, one of the world’s top grain exporters, from shipping agricultural products through its Black Sea ports. The grain deal allowed Ukraine to ship grain and has been essential in mitigating a global surge in food prices.

Explainer: What’s up with the ‘grain deal’ and Russia?

On Nov. 2, Russia announced it would continue its participation in the deal that allows grain shipments from Ukraine via the Black Sea, ending several days of turmoil when the vital deal was hanging by a thread. The grain exports crisis started with Russia’s full-scale invasion of Ukraine, which

The Kyiv IndependentOleg Sukhov

Ukrainian military report advancing in Melitopol, Bakhmut directions

Andrii Kovalov, the General Staff spokesperson, reported that Ukrainian forces continue to advance south of Bakhmut, Donetsk Oblast, in the Bila Hora-Andriivka sector.

“There are successes in the Bila Hora-Andriivka sector, (troops) are solidifying newly taken positions,” Kovalov said.

According to him, Ukrainian forces continue to repel Russian attempts to advance in Kupiansk, Lyman, Avdiivka, and Marinka directions, while Moscow is deploying its reserves in these sectors. Heavy fighting is underway, Kovalov said.

On the same day, Colonel Mykola Urshalovych, an officer with the National Guard, reported that Ukrainian forces advanced over 1,700 meters in the Melitopol direction within a week.

“Our units are advancing through dense enemy minefields at the approaches to their positions and under heavy fire, including 213 strikes from multiple-launch rocket systems, tanks, and artillery, and six airstrikes during the past week,” Urshalovych said.

Russian troops are attempting to counterattack to regain lost ground but are being repelled.

Ukraine’s counteroffensive is ongoing, with heavy fighting in Zaporizhzhia and Donetsk oblasts.

On July 13, Deputy Defense Minister Hanna Maliar reported successful advances on the southern front line, particularly in the sectors of Novodanylivka-Shyroka Balka and Mala Tokmachka-Novopokrovka.

The Institute for the Study of War (ISW) also reported in its latest assessment that Ukrainian forces made some gains in at least three sectors of the front lines, including in western Zaporizhzhia Oblast and around Bakhmut as of July 13.

Ukraine’s General Staff said the country’s forces had liberated 14 square kilometers as of July 10.

Francis Farrell: As the world watches the counteroffensive, a sober hold on reality is Ukraine’s greatest weapon

This June was meant to be all about the great Ukrainian counteroffensive. After months of waiting, dozens of public statements from exasperated Ukrainian officials bound to silence, and even more analyses from experts and commentators in the media, the moment finally came when Ukrainian soldiers on…

The Kyiv IndependentFrancis Farrell

Ukraine returns bodies of 62 fallen soldiers

The bodies of 62 fallen soldiers have been returned to Ukraine from the occupied territories, the Reintegration Ministry reported on July 14.

According to the ministry, four of them died in Russian captivity due to injuries, diseases, and inadequate medical treatment.

After the bodies of Ukrainian defenders are identified, they will be handed over to their relatives for burial.

In late June, Ukraine retrieved the bodies of 51 fallen service personnel.

According to the Coordinating Headquarters for the Treatment of Prisoners of War, Ukraine brought back the bodies of over 1,400 fallen soldiers from the start of Russia’s full-scale invasion to March 2023.

One year on, Kherson activist kidnapped by Russian troops remains in captivity

On the morning of May 13, Tetiana Horobtsova was busy in the kitchen at her home in then-occupied Kherson when she heard her daughter saying, “Mom, they’ve come for me.” She left the kitchen to find her daughter – 37-year-old IT specialist Iryna Horobtsova – standing on the balcony, looking pale

The Kyiv IndependentDaria Shulzhenko

[hardynwa]

Six dead, dozens confirmed missing in China mine collapse

Dozens of people remained missing on Friday following a collapse at a coal mine in northern China that killed six, state media reported. A rescue operation involving hundreds of workers was ongoing after a 180-metre-high slope gave way at the open-pit mine in the Inner Mongolia region’s Alxa Left Banner area on Wednesday.Emergency efforts were initially hampered after another landslide later that day. According to state broadcaster CCTV, 47 people were still unaccounted for, six were recovered alive, while another six were found dead. China’s ministry of emergency management urged “all-out efforts to search for the missing personnel without delay, and not to lose hope of finding them”, state news agency Xinhua reported Friday. “Saving lives is still the top priority,” Xinhua quoted a ministry work team as saying, adding that “efforts should also be made to prevent secondary disasters”. Footage from CCTV showed rescue workers in orange overalls and yellow helmets dwarfed by a mountain of rust-coloured rubble, and excavators working to clear some of the debris. “I had just started work when I saw slag falling down the slope. The situation got worse and worse,” a rescued worker named Ma Jianping told CCTV. “We tried to organise an evacuation, but it was too late — the slope came down,” he said from a hospital bed in the neighbouring Ningxia region, a catheter protruding from his throat. State media reported the collapse had affected a “wide area” of the mine operated by the Xinjing Coal Mining Company. It was not clear what caused the collapse. CCTV said police were investigating, while Xinhua on Friday said the ministry of emergency management had called for “comprehensive investigations”. – ‘I’d have died’ –Video posted on social media by a coal truck driver on Wednesday showed rocks cascading down a slope, kicking up clouds of dust that engulfed several vehicles. “The whole slope has collapsed… How many people must be dead from that?” a male voice can be heard saying in the background. “If I’d lined up over there today, I’d have died in there, too.” Located in China’s arid north, Alxa League — which includes the Alxa Left Banner — is a sparsely populated region whose economy runs largely on mining and other extractive industries. Mine safety in China has improved in recent decades, as has media coverage of major incidents, many of which were once overlooked. Accidents still occur frequently, however, in an industry where safety protocols are often lax, especially at the most rudimentary sites. Around 40 people were working underground when a gold mine in the northwestern Xinjiang region collapsed in December. In 2021, 20 miners were rescued from a flooded coal mine in northern Shanxi province, while two others died. Read the full article

[demifiendcruithne]

okay i am probably going to heck up the tag limit if i put my observations in tags so i'm moving it here

for context, i was diagnosed autistic when i was like 10 (well, diagnosed aspergers but heck that) - i guess i'm providing this as a 'okay this autistic person is having this same issue with this given question that helps' sort of thing because a lot of these questions are difficult for me to precisely answer. (i'm not going to note the ones that are obvious for me because uh. not much point)

also i realised pretty quickly that me typing all this out is Also a clear sign of the autism :v so i'm wondering how high i'll score on that hecker

1. I am a sympathetic person. okay. i know i have hyperempathy, but this made me look up the difference between sympathy and empathy; 'sympathy is when you share the feelings of another; empathy is when you understand the feelings of another but do not necessarily share them' (source: merriam-webster) and thinking about it - i don't think i do have sympathy in that sense because i interpret it through how i would feel in that situation, which i think is more empathy? if it's something i haven't experienced i don't really share the feelings because i don't understand them. i may very well be wrong about the interpretation here; please tell me if i am because sympathy/empathy has been hecking me for ages

2. I often use words and phrases from movies and television in conversations. not movies and television but i absolutely often use phrases from other media like video games and memes and stuff. that's the same thing right? i'm counting it as the same thing, i can name exactly where many parts of my vocabulary came from ('i do not comprehend' is digital devil saga, 'optimal/suboptimal' is kingdom of loathing etc)

6. I can 'put myself in other people's shoes.' only if they're the same size. and even then i probably can't because i can't do laces and i've only been able to wear One Specific Style of shoe for the last over a decade pretty much. why is this even on here??? is it a sensory thing? wait i just noticed the quotes it's another heckin phrase isn't it and then my partner used said phrase while talking about a later question. yeah i can't do that either

9. I focus on details rather than the overall idea. this is a tough one because i also have adhd! but i'm going to say yes because i'm often thinking 'how do i do this one specific part' without working out how it fits into the overall project and then having to rewrite parts of code to fit together better / optimise

11. I miss my best friends or family when we are apart for a long time. okay this one's difficult. i can easily pick up a conversation with someone i haven't talked to for months like nothing happened, and while i like being in the same place as my sibling, i don't miss them in the sense of i will be upset because we aren't in the same place? i do miss my partner, but it's something i only actively realise for a few weeks after leaving / when i next arrive there, or if i'm in bad emotional heck that he'd be able to help me with better in person. so i don't know if that counts (i wouldn't be surprised if i got something like borderline's favourite person thing going on there) because it's not the same as the stereotypical romance movie thing... i'll go with no because he's an exception to the rule and if i think 'okay who am i going to miss when i move' it'll be the cats not my mum and stepdad (like. they're cool, but i can still talk to them?)

14. I'd rather go out to eat in a restaurant by myself than with someone I know. i think the only people i'd rather go to a restaurant with than go on my own are my partner and my sibling, both of whom Understand so we wouldn't have the awkward what do we talk about over food / can i listen to music / can i do stuff on my phone i'll still go with a close family member if they're paying but it'll be weird for me and they have to accept me Needing the music and well, given that one of my safe food places right now is just going to a pub on my own (so long as i can get a corner seat out of the way)...

18. I understand when friends need to be comforted. see: hyperempathy above. notable example: my partner finds it a lot easier to just move on from stuff than i do, but while i logically understand that the empathy still makes me feel bad if i don't try and comfort / make things better even when literally the best thing i can do is not worry about it. what i'm saying is, the sense of 'i'll comfort when it isn't needed' is a sense that can happen too and also is a false here

31. I have never wanted or needed to have what other people call an 'intimate relationship.' okay this one might also be skewed by demi because i. don't understand what most people mean by that. i know my relationship with my partner (likely also autistic) isn't exactly the same as 'normal people' relationships - we're vibing, and i know i'd prefer that to pretty much any stereotypical media relationship which i guess is what other people would call it? thinking about it - when i was younger, i did want - or thought i wanted - a stereotypical relationship, i got what i thought were crushes (i have no idea if they were). but it also might have been peer pressure? i don't remember much from when i was under 16 because ptsd so. and i was diagnosed around the time my parents split which might also affect it... i'm just going to go with true because i interpret 'what other people call an intimate relationship' as different from the relationship my partner and i have because we don't have the stereotypical stuff, and there's too many factors to determine what i actually wanted as a kid besides that i didn't have a major change of any sort on it... and also now i think about it most people probably don't count long distance either so

37. I am an understanding type of person. i don't. know? in what sense? it's again a lot easier for me to understand things if it's clearly something i've experienced. for example, if someone walking with a stick stops in front of me suddenly, i understand because heck random flareups. if someone who doesn't have any mobility aids or any clear-to-me reason for stopping does the same, i get annoyed because me then having to stop suddenly hecks with the fibro and i don't see a reason for them to have stopped, even though there very likely is one. i think i tend to be a lot more understanding of disabled folk as a whole because, well. even if it's not the exact same thing, i've got so much going on i can understand by tangent. but i get a lot more annoyed by a loud baby than by a loud adult displaying similar symptoms to me (like loudly talking to themselves or having a meltdown or such), even though i'm fully aware that the baby also has no other choice but to be loud... so i'm going to go with no here by reasoning of 'this is only the case in some situations' as opposed to 'this is the case in most situations' which would be a yes

48. I try to be as helpful as I can when other people tell me their personal problems. hyperempathy! the scoring system probably expects a false here, but it's from over a decade ago i think? i think the stereotype was low empathy. heck i don't even know if it's counting sympathy and empathy as the same thing. but yeah i try. i'm not very good at it unless - again - it's something i've been through

49. I have been told that I have an unusual voice (for example flat, monotone, childish, or high-pitched). wait that's an autism thing??????? they tried to give me speech therapy before i was even diagnosed and it didn't work :V

52. I have never been interested in what most of the people I know consider interesting. okay this is also a tough one because how does it define 'people i know'? as a kid, i wasn't interested in most stuff other kids were. that's fine and normal. now? most people i know are interested in at least one thing i am - because i know them through communities about said interest. i don't work and my uni is online, so i don't know those people well enough to say... i guess the best judgment would be 'am i interested in anything my mum and stepdad consider interesting' since until tomorrow i live with them, which... yeah. i think the only thing there is the cats. (and as of tomorrow i live with my sibling and their friend; we do share a few interests but not enough to push it i think)

53. I am considered a compassionate type of person. hyperempathy! but also i have. no idea if anyone considers me that??? compassion isn't even a word i've heard in the last who knows how long

Versil, [01/02/2024 13:14] Noun compassion (usually uncountable, plural compassions) Deep awareness of the suffering of another, coupled with the wish to relieve it. Versil, [01/02/2024 13:14] therefore absolutely very much so

though this also is an adhd thing so.......

59. Sometimes things that should feel painful are not (for instance when I hurt myself or burn my hand on the stove). this is hard to judge because i have Constant Pain from fibro but. i'll interpret it as not adding as much pain as it should, and a lot of the time i'll collide with something and say ow but it doesn't actually hurt, so i guess?

62. I usually speak in a normal tone. what the heck is a normal tone??????? i'm going to go with no because my speech goes all the heck over the place (which also might be many other factors) but

63. I like things to be exactly the same day after day and even small changes in my routines upset me. while 'exactly the same' isn't true, once i've got a routine i dislike changes to it, and in theory one could simplify it down to just basic activity descriptions rather than noting the exact so that two days where the only thing different is that one day i'm drawing and one day i'm coding would still be the exact same by virtue of them both coming under 'personal project'... i do have to be adaptable anyway because fibro is a hecker. i hate it though. but also adhd means i can't actually GET a schedule going so i'm constantly upset i guess :v i'm going with true because i like each day to be a vague templated routine i guess? the point still is that unexpected changes upset me so

69. I like to be by myself as much as I can. i guess? there's a few exceptions, but i'd rather be on my own than go to a hangout unless the hangout is specifically catered to an interest i have - for example where i used to play d&d i'll go there for d&d but i won't go and hang out and watch people play (for example) warhammer even if it's the exact same people i also stay in my room most of the time instead of hanging out with my mum and stepdad, and i wouldn't be surprised if a lot of times i'll be talking to my sibling over internet still after moving instead of one of us going to the other's room, so...

70. I keep my thoughts stacked in my memory like they are on filing cards, and I pick out the ones I need by looking through the stack and finding the right one (or another unique way). i have a sims action queue. if something's interrupted it's gone :)

74. I don't like to be hugged or held. again - this is one that yes i don't like this from most people but there's exceptions! i don't know what i'm meant to pick for these... for the majority of people this is true, so i'm going with true even though there's the few people i do like hugs from i guess one way of determining it is again, do i like hugs from my mum and stepdad, which. i don't dislike, but i don't actively seek out, so...

Total: 231 Language subtotal: 21 Social relatedness subtotal: 111 Sensory/motor subtotal: 60 Circumscribed interests subtotal: 39

227 The maximum score autistic people acquired in Ritvo’s seminal paper on the RAADS–R.[9] 240 The maximum possible RAADS–R score.

...yay?

If you don’t know your score, take the test here

[dropintomanga]

Cool Japan Has No Community

Years before I started blogging about manga, I was somewhat involved in the promotion of Japanese culture in New York City. At the time, anime and manga were going through a boom period. Crunchyroll was still a pirate anime site. I then overheard something from a colleague about an initiative called Cool Japan. It was supposed to be this big move of “soft power,” given how creative Japan is when it comes to anime and manga. There’s been a company called the Cool Japan Fund that was formed in 2013 to take advantage of Japanese pop culture gaining more attention outside of its home country.

Yet after hearing about Cool Japan a decade plus later, it hasn’t done anything substantial to get the world’s attention. Quite frankly, I don’t think they give a damn about building a community of fans.

The big news is that Cool Japan might finally come to an end. The Cool Japan Fund announced that they owe 30.9 billion yen (about $220+ million) as of 2021. They want to make a profit by 2025 or risk consolidation. The company has blamed COVID to a certain degree for the lack of success and they’re hoping to finalize a plan to get things back on track.

Sigh. I don’t know anymore. I guess I sound like Gackt in that there’s been really no serious promotion of anything Japanese culture-related outside of Japan. Like, what is Cool Japan to begin with? And even if there was promotion, there’s an insane amount of control behind what Japanese media companies want to enforce.

The best example I can give is Japanese music. Music videos featuring various artists have an awful habit of being region-locked. Sometimes, you might not get the full MV. Compare this to Korean pop culture, where everything about it is promoted by the Korean government and they’re the ones saying, “Hey, feel free to share this with everyone you know!” with no restrictions. When you have Japanese video game companies come up with silly streaming restriction guidelines (Hi, Atlus!) and dismantling relationships with fans who want to promote their games (Hi, Nintendo!), how can you say Japan is cool?

I remember watching a 2019 Maximillian Dood video about why Japanese game companies haven’t implemented rollback netcode in their fighting games for the longest time. He pointed to a Wikipedia article entitled “Not invented here.” The article states that it’s a practice where institutions refuse to implement products/research/ideas from other cultures/societies that aren’t like them. This is mostly due to a variety of reasons, from a lack of understanding of outsiders to a tribalistic belief that the institution knows how to do things best. I think this is Japan in a nutshell as I think they want to take credit for promoting Japanese pop culture over Westerners who have a better sense of doing so.

Recently, something happened in the overseas riichi mahjong scene that drew a lot of attention. It involved the sudden region-lock of a Abema TV livestream featuring a popular professional mahjong league called M-League. Since its inception, M-League has garnered many fans from all over the world with some of the coolest pro players and moments the riichi mahjong world has ever seen. Abema TV live-streams M-League whenever games are on. Then one day on October 13, 2022, there was an announcement saying “This video isn’t available in your area.” Fans took to Twitter to complain about the region-lock. What was revealed was that there are copyright issues and the staff are working on them. However, there’s no timetable for when the live streams will be readily available for fans across the world. The only consolation is that VODs streamed for the day will be available for 24 hours after they air live. (Update: As of 12/12/2022, the region lock for M-League is gone and overseas fans can watch games as they happen live).

To quote this post about the whole situation, it’s an overseas struggle. A long time ago, a Japanese colleague of mine who has done consulting work with Japanese companies that wanted to make a mark in the U.S. told me something that still rings a decade later. She told me that Japanese businesspeople who come here to do things will just come in, do their job, and then leave when everything’s over. They don’t necessarily bother to care about whatever they’re promoting as long as the job’s done. I know this too well as many mangaka don’t really think too much about overseas reception because they’re too busy creating for the Japanese audience.

I will gladly tell people that overseas people have promoted Japanese culture far better than Japan has ever done. They have a much better understanding of why Western folks love Japan. There’s been many grassroots groups over in my part of the world that have done a lot. Sure, some of it may involve piracy, but there’s always reminders to support the official works. I mean, it took a group of American-based fansubbers, which would become Crunchyroll, to convince TV Tokyo that the international audience was worth something to invest in and that they were willing to pay to watch streams if they were accessible enough.  

However, I strongly feel that the things that Cool Japan wants to promote to the world are very different from what fans like about Japan - which are anime, manga, and video games. Basically, all things nerdy. Otaku fandom may not be as stigmatized as once it was, but it’s still not something to be proud of over in Japan.

And even if there was a focus on promoting anime and manga, it’s all a joke. What Japan wants to do is generate a collective mindset across the world like their culture, not a community of like-minded people with different strengths that make it much stronger. Collectivism and community are two different things. Community provides a genuine sense of purpose while collectivism’s sense of purpose is that you should be a cog in some grand machine that’s “worth your while.”

The one thing that I (and fans may agree with me on this) can say is that trying to be cool leads to alienation. We’re seeing this time and time again from Japanese organizations that want to leverage its cultural power. If only Japan learned from their own creations - the many notable anime/manga characters that know when being cool helps and when it doesn’t.

[bluesilksilverspurs]

The internet is a brilliant thing sometimes.

I was sitting this morning before I dried my hair, thinking. I was thinking about Albert Wesker, from Resident Evil. Specifically, I was thinking about a magazine article that I'm fairly sure was the kindling that started my first obsession, and the sudden weird and new er, urges, that came with it.

The magazine in question was the April 2000 issue of Games Master UK. There was a four page review of Resident Evil Code Veronica, which had been released for the Sega Dreamcast. My friend's brother had let me borrow it and I re-read that article so many times I could quote it verbatim. I still could remember a lot of it, even now, 21 years later. At 13, I was fascinated.

I'd ration out the times I'd look at it, becoming more and more guilty about this pull, about how all my thoughts seemed to return to a small photo of a character from the first game who was dead as far as I or any other RE fan at the time knew. I didn't know how the story of RECV would play out but I NEEDED to know. I tried to buy the magazine for way over the cover price but my friend's brother wouldn't be parted from it. This was pre easy access internet, or even good camera phones, so I was distraught at giving up the article!

Anyway. That obsession with Albert Wesker has continued for over two decades. Post teenage sexual awakening, it has waxed and waned, and sometimes I find it weird that I've been smitten with a video game character for that long. But then I think of the comfort it - he? - has brought me - the escapism, the ability to be someone I'm not, really, to have my own OC grow and change as I did.

And GUESS WHAT I FOUND ONLINE TODAY?

A pdf of the magazine! Reading through that article again was a trip. Am I a weirdo? Probably. But Albert Wesker will always have a place in my heart 🥰

[anotheruserwithnoname]

A Jenna DVD/Blu-ray guide (Nov. 2021 edition)

I know a lot of people have moved to digital downloads and streaming, but as someone who treats permanent media like DVD and Blu-ray with the same reverence as books (and who has experienced the “loss” of favoured shows on streaming because of expired licences), that’s still my preferred media.

With the holidays approaching, I thought I’d give a quick run-down for any fellow Jenna Coleman fans who might be interested (especially newcomers) of what Jenna productions are currently available on DVD, Blu-ray and (in some cases) CD. As I’m in Canada I’m going to mainly focus on what’s available through Amazon US (which usually aligns with Amazon Canada). If I know of something available in the UK and not here, I’ll note it.

Page break for those who aren’t interested or already know all this stuff! (And corrections are always welcome!)

Listed in more or less chronological order:

Emmerdale Farm: Jenna appeared in well over 400 episodes of this soap opera. I’m aware of no DVD release of her episodes.

Waterloo Road: Jenna appeared in Series 5. According to Amazon US, only Series 1 has been released on North America. Series 5 is available in UK format. At one point, all episodes of Series 5 (minus opening and closing credits) were officially uploaded to Youtube worldwide.

Xenoblade Chronicles: A video game, not a movie, for which Jenna provided the English voice dub for a character. Amazon US has the 2020 “Definitive Edition” (which includes new content recorded by Jenna) for the Nintendo Switch. You can also still order the original game for Wii and 3DS. Caveat: I don’t know if Jenna’s vocals are featured on all of these versions. Check first before ordering.

Captain America: The First Avenger: Obviously as a Marvel movie, this thing is everywhere (and might be the only Jenna production also available in the 4K Ultra HD format). Don’t forget Jenna is in two scenes (look fast for her as a camp nurse later in the movie. She’s the only one wearing white - easy to spot, especially in high def. It only took some of us a decade to do so!).

Titanic: The 4-part miniseries is available in BD and DVD in North America and right now is listed by Amazon US for quite cheap.

Room at the Top: No DVD or BD for this one, due to the rights complications that delayed its broadcast on the BBC for a year. Any DVDs listed for Region 1 are for the 1950s movie. The miniseries is available on Amazon Prime in North America for streaming. (I think its on iPlayer in the UK but don’t quote me.)

Dancing on the Edge: Available on DVD and BD, again quite cheap from Amazon.

Doctor Who: Series 7, 8 and 9, obviously, plus Twice Upon a Time if you want her cameo too. Day of the Doctor and Time of the Doctor are available as standalones. There’s also a 3D standalone release of Dark Water/Death in Heaven. If you want to get some of the more obscure stuff like the Doctor Who Ultimate Guide or Five(ish) Doctors Reboot spoof, you need to seek out one of the Matt Smith Years collections (there’s an expensive box set and a more recent version). Jenna also recorded a few lines as Clara for the Lego Dimensions video game and its Doctor Who “mission pack”. I believe this online-based game has been retired and I haven’t seen it for sale for a while.

Death Comes to Pemberley: Amazon US lists several places carrying the DVD, but not the Blu-ray. The North American release is the UK edit - it’s possible the PBS broadcast had additional footage (as was the case with Victoria) but I’ve never heard of any extra footage of Jenna.

Me Before You: Widely available (often in Wal-Mart bargain bins).

Thunderbirds Are Go: Jenna provided a guest voice (and her likeness) for the Series 2 episode, “Earthbreaker.” No DVD or BD release for North America is listed on Amazon (but it’s streaming on Prime). The series is available on DVD in the UK.

Victoria: All 3 series are available in North America (with the Christmas special included with S3). A box set of the first 3 series is available for DVD only. Unlike the UK, S3 only got a DVD release over here. My understanding is the UK DVDs/Blu-rays also include commentaries and special features not on the US releases. The US releases are the ITV UK edits and lack the 5-10 minutes added per episode for PBS airing (though on the plus side, whereas PBS cut a lot out of the Christmas special, including the whole “Victoria’s sexy painting” subplot, it’s intact on the DVD). If you’re in the states you may be able to stream the US edits on your local PBS station’s website. Otherwise fingers crossed that if they ever put out a “Complete Series” set (hopefully after a Series 4!) they’ll include the extra footage as “deleted scenes” or something.

The Cry: Although it was released on DVD in North America a year after it streamed on Sundance (UK also got a Blu-ray along with a DVD and theirs came out only a week or so after BBC aired it), Amazon US currently lists it as no longer available. However I have seen it at brick-and-mortar stores recently, so go get some fresh air and take a look/

All My Sons: National Theatre Live does not (yet) release its cinema streams to DVD or Blu-ray, but one of the few positives of C19 as it inspired NTL to finally start putting some of its broadcasts on a streaming service, available worldwide. All My Sons was at one point available but may not be anymore.

Corporate Monster: This short sci-fi horror film that was delayed in releasing for nearly a decade is unlikely to get a DVD or Blu-ray release unless it gets picked up for an anthology (it actually would make a half-decent Twilight Zone if they ever wanted to follow the precedent of the original series and pick up short films from elsewhere as filler episodes). It is currently available for free viewing (authorized) on the Omelto YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_kYUf-Qncss

Inside No. 9: Jenna’s guest appearance in Series 5′s “Death Be Not Proud” is on DVD and Blu-ray in the UK, but there’s yet to be a North American physical release for any of the show’s season’s; it’s on Amazon Prime, though.

A Separate Peace: As part of a (sadly aborted) effort to launch a series of virtual plays during the first C19 lockdown, Jenna partnered with David Morrissey (of The Next Doctor and Walking Dead fame) on a Zoom-based production. As indicated, it was meant to be a one-off with no reissue planned or expected (and admittedly would look like hell even on DVD resolution). If you hunt around you might be able to find recordings of it online, but I won’t tread those waters further here.

The Serpent: The UK has a DVD release. North America may get one in 2022 once Netflix’s one-year exclusivity ends. Netflix does not release every show to DVD or Blu-ray, so it remains to be seen if The Serpent gets a release over here.

Billion Pound Bond Street: Jenna’s most recent production not counting the Boots commercial, this documentary is not available on DVD or Blu-ray in North America. It is listed for streaming on the UK version of Amazon Prime, however.

CD/audio releases:

The Secret Garden: Amazon US does list Jenna’s abridged reading of the children’s book from 2013, but it’s in the collector price market now. I have seen it listed for cheaper elsewhere, like Book Depository, so hunt around. It’s also available on Audible for those who prefer to stream.

Destiny of the Doctor: The Time Machine: Now out of print on CD, you can order a download for only a few dollars from Big Finish.com. I haven’t ordered anything from BF since 2017, but downloads before then were generally actual downloads - MP3 or similar files, not streams. This is the one where Jenna plays a new companion - as well as the Eleventh Doctor. It’s the final chapter of a 12-parter, however, so you may need to invest in the others to make sense of it all.

A Christmas Carol: You need to go hunting for this one as there are zillions of audio adaptations. This was an audio drama done exclusively for Audible streaming a few years ago. Last I looked it was available for free, but I’ve never heard it so don’t know how much of a role Jenna plays in it. Being made for Audible, it’s unlikely to ever get a legal CD release.

Pressures, Residential: a Black Mirror-esque short story recorded by Jenna for an Esquire Magazine-related fundraiser during the early months of C19. No physical release is expected but you can listen to the story - and read along with the text - here.

Beatrix Potter: The Complete Tales: Jenna is one of many celebrities (including David Tennant and Pearl Mackie) who recorded readings of Potter’s children’s stories for this CD set. No listing on Amazon but it’s available worldwide from Book Depository and possibly from shops that are well-stocked with CD audio books. There’s probably a digital version but I haven’t checked.