#i still have special feelings about Jay and Billy's friendship

[wrestlingisfake]

Death Before Dishonor preview

Mark Briscoe vs. Roderick Strong - Strong defeated Dalton Castle on July 13 to earn a shot at the ROH men's world championship. Briscoe has held the belt since April 5. Strong has lengthy history with Ring of Honor--including a world title reign in 2010-2011--but this will be his first match for the brand in eight years.

Strong signed with AEW last year, and since then his character has gone on a curious odyssey. During the Adam Cole/MJF storyline, he played the passive-aggressive whiner trying to break up the budding friendship. When Cole turned on MJF in December, the big twist was that Roddy was in on it from the start. Strong was positioned as the #2 man in Cole's Undisputed Kingdom, which was clearly positioned to be a killer main event heel faction. But since Adam is still rehabbing from an ankle injury, Roddy has effectively spent 2024 as the frontman for a goofy midcard heel faction.

At the same time, Mark Briscoe has come into his own as a singles act. AEW has given him more and more time on TV and on the microphone. I originally thought they put the title on Mark because he could be a full-time ROH guy, whereas Eddie Kingston had gotten so hot that they needed him to be on AEW as much as possible. Now I feel like Briscoe is as hot as Eddie ever was. Is now the time for Mark to drop the belt and move up to bigger and better things? Is now the time for the Undisputed Kingdom to be "demoted" to the minor league? It's hard to say.

If I seem to be focusing on the big picture, that's because the week-to-week storytelling for ROH is at an all-time low. Roddy won a match two weeks ago for this title shot. That is the entire story. I'm not even sure these two have appeared on-screen together since the match was announced, and what little narrative there is has been entirely on AEW programming. If there's going to be an effort to revitalize ROH, it'd sure be nice if it started tonight.

I could see this match going either way, but something tells me that the most interesting outcome would be a big angle to put the title on Strong.

Athena vs. Queen Aminata - Athena has been the ROH women's world champion for 594 days, and she's defending the title here. The key plot point in this story is that Athena claimed to have a knee injury and then unilaterally decided she would not defend the title or relinquish it. This didn't work, and she's being compelled to defend the belt; I haven't checked in lately to see if she's still acting like she can't compete.

Aminata has been on the warpath ever since Billie Starkz bamboozled her in their women's television title match on April 5. This led to Aminata and Red Velvet joining forces against Athena and Starkz, which somehow led to Aminata challenging...Athena? I mean, that's fine, but why wouldn't she want revenge on Billie first? So yeah, every time I think about this card, I have to double-check that it's really Athena-Aminata and Starkz-Velvet, and that I didn't get the challengers mixed up.

I keep thinking someday Athena is going to lose the title and return to the AEW roster with a big push as an unstoppable force. But I'm not thinking Aminata is the one to dethrone her. I like Aminata, and she'd be a cool champion. But I also remember how long she was a jobber until she got that All Elite graphic, so I guess I never expect her to get a big push. Athena retains again.

Marshall Von Erich & Ross Von Erich & Dustin Rhodes vs. Evil Uno & John Silver & Alex Reynolds - The winning team will qualify for a match on tomorrow's Battle of the Belts special, for the vacant ROH trios title.

You may recall that the AEW and ROH trios titles were unified on April 21. For whatever reason, Jay White & Austin Gunn & Colten Gunn continued to carry around both sets of belts (and a custom set of the AEW belts) for the next three months. When Jay was injured, the titles were vacated. A match on July 20 crowned new champions...but just for the AEW trios title. It looked like the ROH trios title was finally being retired...and then this match was announced five days later. So that's kind of weird.

Marshall and Ross are the sons of Kevin Von Erich, the sole survivor of the legendary Von Erich Brothers from the glory days of World Class Championship Wrestling in Dallas. AEW is running shows for the next six weeks down the road in Arlington. The Von Erichs famously dominated the World Class trios title, so I assume that's why Marshall and Ross aren't chasing the tag belts. The goal is clearly to get Von Erichs on as many of the Arlington shows as possible, so it would make no sense for them to lose now.

Billie Starkz vs. Red Velvet - Starkz is putting the ROH women's television title up for grabs. As noted, I am baffled this isn't a rematch against Queen Aminata. I suppose I wouldn't give Red much of a chance in a world title match, whereas a secondary title on the secondary brand seems more attainable. She has a pretty decent chance of winning, but I'm still going to pick Starkz to retain.

Atlantis Jr. vs. Lee Johnson vs. Lio Rush vs. Brian Cage vs. Shane Taylor vs. Johnny TV - Atlantis is defending the ROH men's television title in a six-way "survival of the fittest" match. If I remember correctly, that just means it's under elimination rules, so when one of the participants loses a fall, they have to leave and the match continues without them. The last man left after the other five are eliminated will win the match and the title.

Atlantis won the belt last month in Arena Mexico, as part of the growing relationship between AEW and CMLL. I don't expect him to hold the title very long before dropping it to someone with an AEW contract. But seeing as it's "just" an ROH midcard belt, they could easily leave it on him for 6-8 months, and I'm not sure anyone in the US would miss it. I'm also not sure any of the challengers in this match really need this championship. Honestly if all of these guys were paired off into feuds, where the winners inch closer to gunning for the world title, that would be so much more interesting for Ring of Honor. But instead we've just got another multi-man trainwreck match. I guess I'll pick Atlantis to retain.

Matt Taven & Mike Bennett vs. Tomohiro Ishii & Kyle O'Reilly - This is for the ROH tag team championship, which Taven and Bennett have held since December 27. Taven, Bennett, and Roderick Strong have been passive-aggressively trying to convince O'Reilly that they're his friend and he should join the Undisputed Kingdom. O'Reilly has instead aligned with Mark Briscoe and Orange Cassidy, and of late Ishii has been hanging out with their group.

This should be pretty fun since Taven and Bennett are at just the right level to potentially defeat Ishii, but also act mortally terrified of him for 80% of the match. That should create some good comedy spots, and O'Reilly has a knack for humorously reacting to good comedy spots. I could dig a title change here, but my gut says it's not going to happen.

Wheeler Yuta vs. Lee Moriarty - The ROH pure title is on the line, so the standard pure rules apply. These two went to a ten-minute draw on July 4, so now Moriarty gets a title shot. Yuta has dominated the ROH pure title over the past three years, but he hasn't defended the belt since January 3, due to an injury that sidelined him for about five months.

Under pure rules, the title can change hands via disqualification or count-out, and a 15-minute time limit draw will be decided by a panel of judges. Punches to the face are always illegal in pro wrestling, but under pure rules they're more illegal--you get two warnings and after that it's an instant DQ. You can only escape a hold by going out of bounds three times--after that, it won't save you. This is supposed to encourage the participants to focus on pure grappling instead of punching, cheating, and rope breaks. In practice, though, the wrestlers just end up trying to force each other to touch the ropes a lot. I'm sure Yuta and Moriarty can have a great match, but I'm also sure these rules will not enhance the match in any particular way.

I'd like to see a title change, but after a lengthy absence it's hard to tell what they have planned for Yuta, so this could go either way.

Leyla Hirsch vs. Diamante - This is billed as a Texas deathmatch. In AEW that amounts to a last man standing match--anything goes, and if you get knocked down you have until the count of ten to get up, or you lose. I've completely forgotten why these two have been feuding, but I guess nothing could settle it so here we are. I'd think the rules favor Diamante, but I guess Hirsch's ground game can still work even if there are thumbtacks and other junk strewn around the ring.

Since I expect both Athena and Billie Starkz to retain their titles tonight, they're both going to need fresh babyface challengers. So I guess I'll pick Hirsch to win here and move up the rankings.

Komander vs. The Beast Mortos - Komander is the AAA cruiserweight champion, but given the AEW-CMLL relationship I doubt he'll be defending the title, or that it will even be mentioned during the show. Mortos, formerly Black Taurus, is pretty cool as a big mean luchador, but he's mainly been used in AEW/ROH as a jobber, and I don't expect that to change here. Unless Komander is leaving AEW/ROH to stick with AAA, I figure he'll win this.

Mason Madden & Mansoor vs. ??? & ??? - This is scheduled for the pre-show. Madden and Mansoor were the Maximum Male Models in WWE, and now they're The MxM Collection," essentially with the same gimmick. From what I heard about the gimmick in WWE, it sounded pretty stupid, but they seem to have added more intentional irony to it. I'm hoping now they'll be more like Fandango and Tyler Breeze, and less like Lenny Lane and Lodi.

This is MxM's in-ring debut for ROH; their opponents have not yet been announced. Now, it'd be hilarious if the Motor City Machine Guns showed up, squashed MxM, and were like "Sike, we're not going to WWE!" But I wouldn't count on anything like that. Chances are the other team will be the Iron Savages, or some other expendable duo, and MxM will kick things off with a win.

[redrobin-detective]

you want a revelation, some kind of resolution

Well this was one shitty creek of a situation he was knee deep in. Not that Jason tended to expect any better from the dumpster of his second life.

“Boss, what do we do?” Petey asked, his voice higher and squeakier than normal with fear. “We got Bats coverin’ us from all sides.”

“Just keep cool, I know how to take care of Bats,” Jason growled out trying to keep his skittish gang in line. Though it really wasn’t much of a gang at this point, since Jay had offed most of the major players and their associates. Right now the Red Hood Gang was just a bunch of snot nosed kids with issues, anger and whole lot to prove. That included their boss. 

“We got a bunch of ammo here, none of it armor piercing but it should provide enough cover for you and the youngins to scram,” Tristan said. He was actually the oldest of them all at 26. Jay didn’t want to admit how hard it was to resist the urge to fall in step behind him. He’d mentioned once he had 3 younger siblings, sometimes talking to him made Jason think of better times with Dick...

“I told you we were doing too much, too fast,” Marco spat as he hastily loaded up empty pistol magazines. “Now we got the whole goddamn Bat Circus waiting to pounce on us.”

“Nah, it ain’t the body count they’re pissed about,” Jason mumbled to himself as he did his own double checks and loosened himself up for brawl. 

Alf had helped him with his 8th Grade production of Macbeth, he’d played Banquo, and had told him to find the happy middle ground of drama, between dull and maudlin. In his grand revenge scheme of leveraging his memory to hurt Bruce, he’d definitely overshot the mark and gotten everyone’s blood up. Hence this very aggressive show of force of trapping them in their current safe house. Only something about this whole thing wasn’t right.

“What I want to know,” Jason, Hood, said as the hairs on the back of his neck tingled. “Is why we’ve had Bats on our ass for 8 whole minutes and not one of them has made an appearance.”

“Maybe they’re already in here, hiding y’know like they do,” Mikey piped up.

“No, I’d know,” Hood responded purposefully enigmatically as he tried to pinpoint what was throwing him off. Something was different. Something was wrong and he couldn’t say what... There was a polite but insistent knock on the entrance of the warehouse.

“They’re knocking?” Big Mike, completely separate from Mikey, gaped incredulously. Everyone else drew their weapons onto the entrance while Jason concentrated on the sounds of warehouse, waiting for the other shoe to drop. He heard the near silent creaks of footsteps on the roof but no one was using the distraction to break in. Had Bruce changed up his MO that much while Jay had been gone?

“Let me in, dipshit, it’s cold out here,” a voice came from the other side of the door. “You got a choice between me and a whole lot of angry Bats. Trust me, I’m prettier.”

“Fuck,” Jason swore, lowering his weapon as he thought about how to get out of this situation. He wasn’t ready for this, wasn’t sure if he’d ever be ready for this. “Back up gents, weapons up but if you fire the next shot is in your skull, capisce?” Behind his hood, he pursed his lips and glared at the closed door. “Doors open,” he called. “No Bats, just you.”

The door was opened casually, like their guest was walking into a party instead of a den of murders and thieves. He stepped with no trace of discomfort, opening and closing the door with his foot while his thumbs were looped through the beltloop of his jeans. Blue eyes scanned the area, his face was neutral but calculating as he took in Jay and his men. God his face...

“Hood,” the man nodded at him then the guys, “Gentlemen. How’s it going?” 

“He’s just a brat, lets ice him,” Booker growled, aggressively posturing with his pistol. The man eyed Booker with an amused half smirk, not moving from his comfortable slouch. He didn’t need to, all he had to do was open his mouth.

“Fucking cool it, that brat can take down Superman,” Jason hissed. His weapon was still deliberately pointed down at the floor. He was having trouble keeping eye contact with his former best friend, no way was he gonna aim a gun at him. “So the Bat realized he and his child soldiers couldn’t take me alone so he called in the big guns, huh?”

“Nice to see you too, Hood,” Billy Batson, grinned with too many teeth to mean it as anything but a threat. “And no, your Dad got a location on you and ditched the weekly early. Didn’t realize I followed till he about to break in. I convinced him to stay outside for a minute while we talked, like old times.”

“Batman’s your dad?” Petey squawked, lowering his weapon to gape over at Jason. The others guys mumbled amongst themselves while Jay just growled at Bill’s small, shit eating grin. Damn bastard knew he had all the cards which was why he was here in his human body and not as the big guy. Hell of a lot easier to shoot at an invulnerable god then his best friend in a beaten leather jacket.

“I’m adopted, not that it made much difference in the end,” Bill’s smile slipped a bit. “What do you want, B?”

“I want you,” Bill stated. “If your guys put down their weapons, I can keep the Bats off them long enough to let them escape but only if you come with me.”

“And why the fuck would I go with you?” Jay asked through gritted teeth. As if he didn’t drive to Fawcett after every major fight with Bruce. As if hadn’t felt completely safe flying high in the sky in Marvel’s arms. As if Bill wasn’t the last person he talked to before he left Gotham for the last time, a lifetime ago...

Bill’s eyes, a faded sky blue with little streaks of gold and brown in them, glared back at hood. Once upon a time, they’d had similar blue eyes but now Jason’s eyes were more green than blue. Just another thing separating them.

“Because I had to skip dinner hunting down your ass so you owe me.” Looking like an overconfident ass, and just a tiny bit cool, Bill walked past them and opened the back door. “Boys, weapons down and you’re free to go. Hood, grab your coat, it’s cold out and I’m way too pissed at you to be your cuddle buddy.”

XxX

Bill tried not to stare at Jason sitting across the table but it was hard. He’d missed his friend so much, wasted so much grief wanting him back even for a moment. And yet what was supposed to be a joyous moment was spoiled by the boiling anger he was barely keeping a lid on. Instead, he stared intently into his coffee as he stirred in more cream while Jason looked intently at the menu.

“It’s funny you’re studying that so hard when we both know you’re ordering a chili dog,” Bill said impatiently when he grew tired of the tense silence. Even Atlas’ stamina wore out at some point. Jay flipped the menu down and sneered at him and god for a moment it felt like old times. Except Jason was older, he had new scars Bill didn’t recognize and old ones that were simply gone. His hair had gone partially grey and his eyes were different but the freckles on his nose wrinkled the same way they always did when he was annoyed.

“Yeah, well maybe you don’t know me as well as you thought, short stack,” Jay sniped back. He had one arm stretched over the back of their booth and his legs sprawled out but there was a tenseness that said he was ready to run at a moment’s notice. Like he no longer trusted Bill anymore.

“Sorry I don’t look like a linebacker on venom,” Bill countered. Jay had always been a bit taller than him but not by much. But whatever had happened to him (the Pit Bruce had, he didn’t want to think about how much that had hurt) it took away all evidence of Jay’s rough childhood living. Bill, on the other hand, was still scrawny, his height small and his immune system shit. 

“You boys ready to order?” Their waitress, Marcy, asked with a gentle smile. 

“Yes Ma’am, I’ll have some of your 24 hr breakfast with a ham and cheese omelet extra cheese and home fries. Jay?” 

“2 Chili dogs,” he grumbled, handing over the menu even as Bill hid his smile in his coffee cup. “How’d you get B off my ass?”

“I work alongside him on the team. He knows when to push me and when not to, he knows that he owes me,” Bill replied with a shrug before setting his coffee down. “Jason,” he sighed, “what the hell are you doing?”

“Oh shove off with your holier than thou shit,” Jay growled, turning to face out the window. They both knew that Bruce and most likely the others were casing the place but, for now, they were out of sight. “You don’t know what I’ve been through, what that man did to-”

“Then maybe you should tell me,” Bill frowned, gripping his cup. “Maybe instead of announcing your return with a duffle bag of heads you could’ve come to us and we’d have helped you get your shit together.”

“B-”

“Almost broke when you died,” Bill cut him off. “Jay I don’t know what you think happened but we almost lost him. If it weren’t for Tim,” Jason’s eyes turned menacingly dark so Bill diverted. “Jesus Jay, I took a leave of absence for almost a month. I never had many friends, losing you, it was like the world dropped out underneath me.”

“Yeah, well you recovered real well,” Jason huffed, leaning over the table to clench and unclench his fists. “Everyone moved on.”

“Did you think the whole world would stop for you?” Bill accused with a scoff. “Grow up, it may have felt like my world died but there were still villains to be foiled, civilians who needed saving. We moved on because the only other option was to dig a grave right next to yours. God knows Bruce did his damndest to do just that.”

“Here ya go, loves, give me a shout if you need anything else,” Marcy said, depositing their meals. Despite having had food security and his own money in his pocket for years, the sight of a full plate before him still gave his heart a little skip. He wondered if Jay remembered the feeling or if he’d forgotten that too.

“Whatever, you don’t get it so I don’t want to talk about it,” Jay grumbled, hunching over and biting into his hotdog. “The fuck you been up to, outside of capes?”

“Got my GED because the League of Babysitters were breathing down my neck. I do odd jobs here and there, whatever I can get with flexible hours. I’m thinking of doing online classes at Fawcett CC to get my degree in social work.” Jason paused for a moment before continuing to devour his dog. Bill, who learned better manners on the streets, ate like a normal human being. 

“You’d be good at that,” Jay said as he polished off the first hotdog. “I thought I might do that, back in the day.”

“I know, we talked about it,” Bill nodded, “can’t say I wasn’t thinking about that when I started filling out applications. There’s a memorial case for Robin in the Cave, a Library in Gotham named after Bruce Wayne’s son but I wanted the memory of Jay, my idiot friend, to carry on too.”

“Bill,” Jay heaved out a heavy sigh. “Why am I here?”

“In this diner? on this side of the veil?” Bill questioned, “can’t really answer the second one but as for the former, maybe I just wanted to watch my best friend make a slobbery mess out of chili dogs again.”

“I ain’t your best friend,” Jason said grabbing his second hotdog.

“Fuck you, yes you are. You never stopped being my best friend which why I’m so mad I could scream at you for the shit you pulled. I can see being mad at the world, I can even see why you’re mad at Bruce but me, Jay?” he asked, not disguising his hurt. “I had to hear about you coming back from a League debrief as Marvel. Had to go a whole shift being calm and composed before I could change back and completely fall apart.”

“The hell was I supposed to say?” Jay asked a bit too loudly. Marcy glanced over at them from across the diner. “I’m not, fuck, I’m not that snot nosed kid anymore who thought being a hero gave him magic. He died and I’m the one who crawled into his carcass and came back. Those times we had were good but they’re gone.”

“Well that’s up for me to decide, isn’t it?” Bill said with a bite of his potatoes. “So as your former and current best friend, it is my duty to tell you that you need to get your head out of your ass. Stop doing stupid shit to piss people off and do things that will actually help you because you know what? I’m not the same person you left either. You’re not special, you’re just as mortal as the rest of us.”

“Says you,” Jason snorted. He reached over and grabbed Bill’s coffee and took a swig. “You still take your crap coffee the same, drowned in cream with not a drop of sugar.”

“And you still can’t buy your own coffee and order it how you want,” Bill said with a smile, stealing it back. The atmosphere was good, calm and silent as they finished their dinners

“I’m not going back with B,” Jason said quietly. 

“I figured,” Bill nodded as he signaled Marcy for the check.

“And I’m not stopping what I’m doing in Gotham, cleaning out the filth the way Batman never could,” Jay growled resolutely.

“I don’t agree with your methods, never will. I won’t be complicit to your demons but I will be your friend. Just think about what it is you want, Jay, that’s all I ask. Oh and keep in contact this time, asshole,” he scribbled his address and phone number on one of the napkins. “Come by anytime but leave the hood at home or you’ll have to deal with the other guy.”

“Shit you’re tougher than him any day,” Jason said, shoving the napkin roughly in his jacket before standing up. “It’s been - Good to see you again, Bill. I missed you.” He stuck out a fist which Bill bumped in return.

“Not as much as I missed you. Take care of yourself, Jason and try to imagine my disappointed face next time you think about killing someone.” 

“Won’t need to imagine, I’ll see it myself when I come to check out your digs. Now I gotta avoid a whole host of flying rodents, see ya,” he said with a lazy, backward wave as he left via the back entrance. Feeling full and content, Bill waited patiently for the check.

“Oh baby, you’re all settled up,” Marcy said as she swung by the table. “Your friend gave me a 50 while I was seating you.” She chuckled and refilled his coffee. “Stay as long as you like and if I were you, I’d keep that friend. He’s a good one.”

“Don’t I know it,” Bill cheered, raising his mug in appreciation as he sipped the hot coffee. It was starting to rain outside but Bill was in no hurry to leave. So he sat at his booth and enjoyed his second cup while basking in the glow of a right wronged. No matter how far astray he went, Jay was still Jay. Bill didn’t need the Wisdom of Solomon to tell him that he just had to wait for Jason to come around. 

[albionjake]

My Top 20 EastEnders Characters Of All Time

Yes this is happening.

I love EastEnders. Everything about it really. I think it’s responsible for some of the greatest characters ever created on TV. Also some of the absolute worst but we’re not here to talk about those! (Looking at you, The Ferreiras) I have come up with a (questionable) list of my favourite 20 EastEnders characters. My criteria? I think longevity is a big plus. The more time I spend with these characters, the more fond I’ve become of them I guess? I also tried not to be blinded by nostalgia... People tend to forget that Michelle Fowler was only in EastEnders for 10 years, to put that in context: Lauren Branning has now been a character for 11 years... It’s the same for many EastEnders ‘legends’. Den and Ange were only really around for 4 years or so... So I’ve been wary of filling the list with a load of pre-2000 people. Jamie Mitchell, you were handsome but you’ve not made the cut.

ANYWAY. Time for a bloody list.

20. Carol Jackson I originally had Sonia here but then I remembered her old mum and changed my mind. Sorry Sonia, you can have the non-existent number 21 spot. Always the bridesmaid. Carol Jackson is an interesting one because she spent so much of her time being a mopey, moaning old cow but when it mattered she showed so much heart and realness that it has to be commended. Lindsay Coulson is one of the best actresses the show has ever seen and made Carol into the most sympathetic of characters. Carol was more like a real person than most characters on the show and I found it refreshing. She’s also the mother of three genuine EastEnders legends (Sonia, Robbie, Bianca) and has so many strong links to the Square. I think it’s a real shame that she’s gone and I really hope she returns one day.

19. Tamwar Masood This seems an odd placing, I know. But I feel Tamwar represents a side of the show that is a little unrepresented in this list. Comedy. Yeah sure, some of the comedy in the show is a little heavy handed (the wonderful Kim Fox, for example) but there are some characters that are so wonderfully, subtly funny and Tamwar was certainly one of those. He was on the show for 9 years and was such a great presence to have around. Always there with a deadpan, sarcastic comment. He wasn’t involved in many memorable storylines (his whole wedding storyline was a waste of time, in my opinion) but now that he’s gone, I really miss him. The Masoods in general were absolutely brilliant and I’d love to see a return for them, if not the whole family then at least more Tamwar.

18. Billy Mitchell Yeah that’s right, I refuse to ignore the runt of the Mitchell litter. I love Billy. I think he’s another very realistic and believable character. He’s so loveable and kind, completely different to who he was when he was first introduced. A perfect example of a character growing into something more. He’s always there to help the Mitchells, no matter how horrible they are to him. His relationships with characters are always so heartfelt and believable too. His granddaughter Lola, his ex-wife Little Mo, his wife Honey, his kids, Jay, Roxy, Pam and Les and even Jamie Mitchell in the end. All really lovely relationships to have watched over the years and all down to how bloody great Billy Mitchell is. May he remain in the Square for decades to come.

17. Shirley Carter She feels like a fairly new character but she’s been on the show for over 10 years now. In her own right, she was brilliant but since her family joined she’s been a pretty unstoppable EastEnders force. Her initial Phil romance and all that came with it was brilliant and her friendship with Heather was one of the best the show has seen, along with her relationship with Ben. But since Mick and his family arrived, things have got incredibly interesting for Shirley. She’s now the matriarch of a whole family. So many new relationships and dynamics and still so many more places to go as a character. She’s grumpy, funny, nasty, bad tempered but ultimately very good hearted. Characteristics we may see again a bit further up this list. Shirley is the sort of character that EastEnders will always work well with. She couldn’t be more perfect for Albert Square.

16. Jay Brown/Mitchell I want to put him higher but I need to be honest with myself and admit Jay hasn’t exactly been at the forefront of EastEnders classic storylines or anything. I just really bloody like him. Yes, I fancy him a bit too. Ultimately, I just like him a lot. I think he’s a lovely character, the sort of character I hate seeing bad things happen to. His tragic early years with his dad’s death still feel very raw and I feel protective over him. The way the Mitchell’s made him one of their own was a brilliant idea and his relationship with Phil, Billy and Ben have all been a joy to watch. I really hope the show gives him more to play with because wasting such a wonderful little character would be a shame.

15. Den Watts Yeah that’s right. I’ve put Dirty Den here. Why? Because overall he’s only spent about 7 years on the show. His first stint is undeniably iconic. He was the first big character the show ever had. He was the reason that 30 million people tuned in on Christmas Day in 1986 when the show wasn’t even two years old. He was the first landlord of the Queen Vic. He was in the first scene and said the first words. But he wasn’t around for long. By 1989 he was floating in the Thames. Then it was 2003 and he was ‘back from the dead’. That whole return was a waste of time. Yes it gave us the brilliant Chrissie Watts and a few other great moments but ultimately it just soured the memory of who Den was before. He’ll always be iconic to the show but he’s not too high on my list.

14. Bianca Jackson Some may be surprised at how high this is but the woman is an absolute legend. Her friendship with Tiffany was one of the great EastEnders friendships, something the show often does very well indeed. Her affair with her mum’s husband Dan was gripping. Her relationship with Ricky was utterly iconic. She has links to a lot of the greatest characters the show has seen which makes her pretty important all round. Her horrible clothes, her gaggle of children, her brash personality, all of it is bloody wonderful. I can’t imagine we’ve seen the last of her and I hope she comes back soon.

13. Grant Mitchell Lower than many EastEnders fans would put him but Grant isn’t what he once was. Sure, he’s got bags of charisma and has had some of the greatest storylines the show has ever seen. He’s also one half of the most iconic brothers in TV history. His whole family is (in my opinion) the best EastEnders has seen or will see. But Grant keeps coming and going and I think it’s damaging his legacy. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for bringing Grant back but please can we have him for a couple of years rather than a few months! It’s such a shame when he just pops back for a bit to remind us of his potential and then just leaves again. I understand that Ross Kemp isn’t interested in a full time return and that’s a real shame but maybe then we should just say goodbye to him for good?

12. Sharon Mitchell/Watts I know, I know, I know. The way I go on about her, you’d expect Sharon to at least have made the top 5... But the reason I love Sharon so much is that she is a bit shit. She’s been a character since the very first episode and has never gone away long enough for a return to feel like too much. Her initial return in 2001 is one of the most iconically camp moments ever. Everything Sharon does is camp. She’s like a lowkey drag queen. I love every Dynesty-esque look, every flutter of the eyelid, every pout and every black outfit. She’s completely ridiculous and annoying but she’s a complete legend and I love her.

11. Ian Beale I know, that’s three real legends in a row now. It’s just... Ian is Ian isn’t he. He’s never going to set our worlds on fire but he’s fucking Ian Beale and he’s been with us since 1985. He’s the annoying little brother we’ve all grown to love(ish) after 30 years. We’ve seen Ian go through all sorts of things and he really has been at the centre of some of the biggest storylines. His marriage to Cindy was truly delightful and his breakdown over the death of his daughter Lucy was incredible. I maintain that Adam Woodyatt’s live acting on the special episode was Oscar worthy. Ian is a legend and he’ll hopefully be there until he’s very old.

10. Ben Mitchell Look, I’m aware that he’s pretty annoying. But what a character. Why do I love Ben? I find his weird personality very funny. He’s always been weird in a variety of ways and I’ve enjoyed them all. His daddy issues have never felt forced. Anyone with Phil as a father would have issues, particularly if they were gay so everything about Ben makes perfect sense to me. Also, we’ve known Ben since he was born. We saw his mum meet his dad, his mum discover she was pregnant, him being born, him contracting meningitis giving him impaired hearing. We only missed 7 years of his life when he went to South Africa with Kathy so we know him so well. I’ve loved pretty much all of his storylines and I hope Ben sticks around ages longer. I must say, I do hope he goes off the rails again soon, I wouldn’t want him to be normal for too long.

9. Frank Butcher A legend if ever there was one. It’s such a shame that Mike Reid died at the relatively young age of 67. It would have been great to see a bit more of Frank. Frank Butcher truly embodies EastEnders, in the same way Alfie and Mick (neither of whom have made this list) have done since. Proper EastEnd wide boys are a staple of the show and you’ll never get a better one than Frank. His relationship with Pat is one of the most famous in British television and the scene where he wore nothing but a spinning bowtie is one of the show’s most iconic. Three of his strongest connections on the show were to characters that that are yet to come on this list which is probably the reason he’s featured so high, I associate him with the best. He was loud, funny and sometimes utterly heartbreaking. I miss him.

8. Max Branning A higher placing than I expected for Max but I think it’s warranted. He’s an absolutely brilliant character. He’s so charismatic, he’s funny, he’s charming, he’s sneaky, he’s frustrating, he’s clever, he’s a hero, he’s a villain and he’s one of the show’s greatest ever characters. His marriage to Tanya was always brilliant viewing, I still hold out hope that we’ll see a return to those days. The affair storyline with Stacey is obviously up there with the greatest. His two daughters are also fantastic characters in their own right with so many layers. The show is always a better place with Max around and I’d love to see a proper return for the Max Branning we know and love. I want him back with Tanya, with a good relationship with his girls and a nice strong base in the Square.

7. Stacey Slater/Fowler I adore Stacey. I think she’s just absolutely bloody fantastic. I want her to my friend. When she first arrived, it felt like one Slater too many seeing as the family were taking up every storyline going but how wrong I was. Stacey Slater is the best thing about EastEnders right now and she’s not even got a storyline. I just love having her around. Her relationship with Martin has gone from something that felt a bit weird to something that feels entirely right. The way she talks him down from his crazy parenting habits is always such a joy to watch and the way she’s always such a great step mum to Bex is delightful. I obviously loved her affair with Max and now I love their friendship. I love her relationship with Kat and the way she isn’t afraid to kick off. Her mental health storylines have always been compelling and Lacey Turner is just one of the best actresses on British TV.

6. Pat Butcher/Evans This is getting very difficult now. The top 6 really are in a different league for me. Pat Butcher is one of the absolute best. She is almost THE icon of EastEnders. She was an ex-prostitute with a heart of gold and a vicious tongue. Her and Frank were the (pearly) King and Queen of the show for many years. Pat was related to so many fantastic characters over the years and had friendships with anyone that mattered. Her relationship with step-daughter Janine was always brilliant to watch. She was always there for her granddaughter Bianca and all her kids. She was a great enemy and eventual best friend to Peggy. Pat Butcher was so many things to so many people. She had the most iconic look with the huge earrings, loud shirts and too much makeup. Her death came far too soon but was incredibly moving to watch. It’s a shame she’s gone. Would be great to have had her around the past few years.

5. Peggy Mitchell The best woman that ever owned the Queen Vic. Yeah sure, Angie was iconic. Pat looked very at home there. Kat couldn’t have been a better fit. Linda is doing a brilliant job. But Peggy is the true landlady of the Queen Vic. “Get out of my pub” is all you need to say to realise that she’ll forever own that place in a way. Peggy was such a tiny little ball of fury and passion. The Mitchell’s are my favourite family by far (there are 6 people with that surname on this list) and she was the undisputed head of that family. Peggy with her two boys, Phil and Grant, will always be the most iconic soap family. She had some incredible storylines and Barbara Windsor gave some wonderful performances. Her one downfall might be the amount of time she actually spent on the Square. She went on breaks fairly often and I always feel like that ruins the characters momentum a little bit. Saying that, her return for her death really was beautiful. I’ve cried multiple times at the scene where Phil reads her letter to him after she’s gone. I think the nation felt the pain at Peggy’s loss as much as the characters did. 4. Kat Slater/Moon What a character. She’s the newest character in the top 5 but has managed almost 17 years! I suppose there was a 5 year break but I don’t think it did much to slow her down. Kat is such a brilliantly complicated character. Viewers loved her and the whole Slater family pretty much as soon as they arrived and Kat was immediately the stand out member. She’s loud, loveable, nasty, compassionate, funny, emotionally draining and much more. She really has got it all. Her Zoe storyline came so soon into their arrival that it gave us an understanding of Kat’s past straight away. It was a brilliant way of giving an explanation of Kat and that little girl who was abused is constantly visible in the character. Her relationship with Alfie is one of the most beautiful on the show. Her relationship with Stacey is a joy. She’s now got a load of kids who will hopefully grow up into great characters in their own right and have Kat as an old EastEnders matriarch figure. She had a great friendship with Bianca that couldn’t have felt more right and she’s had so many fantastic enemies over the years too. You’re never bored when Kat is around and I really hope she returns soon because I miss her terribly. No more RedWater please! Just Kat in the Square. 3. Phil Mitchell The top dog of the Mitchell family has to come highest really. He might not be as likeable as the previous Mitchells listed but he really is the best. He’s had more storylines than most of this list and has spent so much time actually on the show. A good handful of these characters have had loads of extended breaks but Phil really hasn’t. He’s just got back from a break but is already in full Phil Mitchell mode. Phil is best when he’s tearing the Square apart and putting people in their place and it’s great to have him back. This list is full of names that have strong links to Phil: Peggy, Grant, Ben, Sharon, Ian, Billy, Jay, Shirley. It really is testament to what a brilliant character he is. Back in the day, it was Grant who was everyone’s favourite. Grant had all the storylines and Phil was his softer and slightly more boring brother but once Grant was gone, Phil very quickly took over. The ‘Who Shot Phil’ storyline was one of the show’s most iconic. His relationships are always great, even if it is sometimes unbelievable that quite so many beautiful women would fall for him. His rivalry with Ian is one of my favourite long standing strands in the show too. Then you’ve got his two kids Ben and Louise, both great characters in their own rights now who will hopefully be around for a lot longer. He recently had another son with Denise who I’m sure will pop up 15 years or so down the line if the Mitchell’s are still a thing by then. The best thing about Phil is how flawed he is. He’s been a nasty piece of work and will probably continue to be in the future but it’s played so well that you can never properly hate Phil. Everything he does makes sense in his world and the viewers always understand where Phil is coming from, even when they disagree with him. He’s a very special character that Steve McFadden should be proud of. 2. Dot Cotton/Branning The face of EastEnders. Fair enough, Dot’s storylines these days (and most of her history, really) isn’t as exciting as most others on this list but it really doesn’t matter. The character work that has been done on Dot over the years is second to none. EastEnders fans love this woman from the bottom of their hearts and that’s down to how she’s been written for all these years. She’s an incredible character. She’s the only character that’s done a single handed episode. One whole episode with only Dot in it. Dot’s history is so rich and so full of heartbreak but also full of love and happiness. A simple storyline like Abi moving out of Dots comes with such huge emotion and that’s because she’s leaving Dot alone. Anyone but Dot and it wouldn’t have had half the impact. We care about Dot as if she was our own grandma and I can’t think of many characters I can say that about. She’s also so funny. It’s easy to think of Dot as a tragic character after all that’s happened to her and the losses she’s suffered but it’s just as easy to think of her as a comic character. June Brown has always played both sides to perfection. We love Dot whether she’s feeling sorry for herself on her own or being a busy body in the Vic drinking her tomato juice (or sherry at Christmas of course). Dot is an icon if ever there was one and it’s going to be an unbearably sad day when she leaves us. 1. Janine Butcher Yeah yeah yeah, I’m aware that the 5 people above Janine have a much stronger case for being proper EastEnders legends. But come on… Janine is such a force of nature when she turns up, it’s impossible for me to choose anyone else. I’ll admit, I’m pretty obsessed with Janine. I find her completely captivating. She’s so completely evil but then she shows you that tiny glimpse of good in her and you’re right back on her side. She couldn’t be more manipulative, for the characters or the viewers. Obviously the moment you think of when you think of Janine is pushing Barry down the cliff (“If only he’d worn slip on shoes”). She’s manipulated so many people over the years that it’s amazing she’s never been the subject of a whodunnit, hopefully she’ll return one day for that. Although not a murder whodunnit, I want Janine making people’s lives a misery for many years to come. Then there’s the soft side. We often saw the soft side with her beloved dad Frank. We also sometimes saw it between her and different men in her life but never for long. The person I remember most fondly for bringing out Janine’s soft side is Pat. Janine and Pat’s relationship was one of the most hate-filled yet love-filled I’ve seen. When Pat was dying, it was Janine that made me cry most. Seeing Janine so sad about losing someone was too much for me. I have such a great fondness for every side of Janine. I really really really hope Charlie Brooks decides one day that it’s time for Janine to come back because I can’t imagine a year goes by without EastEnders giving her a call. If she never returns though, I wouldn’t mind too much. That final scene when she’s in the airport after murdering Michael and someone asks her what she’s been up to: “Oh you know, just getting away with murder”. OH MY GOODNESS. What a line. What a woman. What a character. Please let her come back soon.