#i still don't know if i like or hate the brushes
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
n1daehodefender · 3 days ago
Note
can you write headcanons with your usual characters (dae-ho, thanos, etc) were they find reader crying in like the bedroom or smtg and they just got home so they don't know what happened, but still kinda comfort reader the best they cant (idk if this makes sense)
Their reactions to finding you crying
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Pairing: kang dae ho, Nam gyu, thanos (Su Bong) Separately!
Warnings: Warnings: Emotional comfort, mentions of crying and emotional distress, gentle themes of reassurance.
A/N: requests are open
Tumblr media
Kang Dae-Ho
Dae-ho had been looking forward to seeing you all day. Work was exhausting, and all he wanted was to relax with you, maybe joke around about something silly or talk about your day. But the moment he walks through the door and hears the faint sound of muffled crying coming from the bedroom, his heart drops. His playful energy vanishes, replaced by deep concern.
He doesn’t barge in immediately. Instead, he pauses to collect himself, not wanting to startle or overwhelm you. Quietly, he knocks on the doorframe, his soft, “Hey, are you okay?” breaking the silence. When you don’t respond right away, he carefully opens the door to find you curled up on the bed, tears staining your cheeks. The sight of you like this pulls at his heartstrings, and any jokes he might’ve planned to crack to lighten the mood are completely forgotten.
Dae-ho moves slowly, not wanting to make you feel pressured to explain yourself. He sits down on the edge of the bed, reaching out to gently brush a stray tear from your cheek. His voice is soft, filled with that golden retriever-like warmth you’ve come to love.
“I’m here, okay? You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”
He gives you space to decide whether you want to lean into him or not, but when you do, his arms wrap around you like a safe cocoon.
Dae-ho’s hugs are everything: firm yet gentle, warm and grounding. He strokes your hair with one hand while the other rubs soothing circles on your back. Occasionally, he presses a light kiss to the top of your head. His presence is steady, reminding you that you’re not alone.
He doesn’t push you to explain, though it’s clear he’s worried. Instead, he keeps his words gentle and encouraging:
“You don’t have to say anything right now. Just know that whatever it is, we’ll get through it together.”
His tone is earnest, his voice trembling slightly from how much he hates seeing you hurt.
Once your tears subside, Dae-ho suggests small things to make you feel better, like getting some fresh air, eating something comforting, or just lying together for a while. He stays with you the entire time, not leaving your side even for a second. If you eventually open up about why you were crying, he listens without judgment, offering reassurance and positivity where he can.
Tumblr media
Nam Gyu
Nam Gyu doesn’t expect to find you upset when he gets home. He’s usually the one you greet with a smile or a sarcastic comment, so the quiet, heavy atmosphere hits him immediately. He hears faint sniffles coming from the bedroom, and his mind races with worry.
The second he sees you crying, his heart clenches painfully. He doesn’t hesitate to approach, his strides purposeful but not rushed. Kneeling in front of you, he cups your face gently, his eyes scanning your expression for any signs of what might’ve happened.
“Hey, what’s going on? Did something happen? Who do I need to deal with?”
His tone is serious, laced with protectiveness, but his touch is gentle.
Nam Gyu hates seeing you cry and will do everything in his power to make it stop—not because he’s uncomfortable with your emotions, but because it physically hurts him to see you in pain. If you don’t want to talk about it, he respects that, but he’ll still hover protectively, sitting close to you and holding your hand. If you lean into him, he wraps you in his arms tightly, his chin resting on top of your head as he murmurs reassurances.
“It’s okay, babe. I’ve got you. Whatever it is, you’re not alone in this.”
His hugs are firm and grounding, making you feel like nothing in the world could touch you as long as he’s there. He rubs your back and strokes your hair, occasionally tilting your chin up to wipe away tears with his thumbs.
Though Nam Gyu isn’t the most emotionally expressive person, he steps up when you need him. His words are straightforward but heartfelt, and he’s willing to listen for as long as you need, his attention completely focused on you.
“Take your time. I’m not going anywhere.”
If you eventually explain, he listens intently, his jaw tightening if it’s something that upset or hurt you. You can see the barely restrained protectiveness in his expression.
Nam Gyu will insist on taking care of you afterward, whether that means cooking your favorite meal, running a bath, or just lying down with you. He’s not the type to leave you alone, ensuring you feel safe and loved before he considers relaxing himself.
Tumblr media
Thanos (Su-bong)
Su-bong is in a great mood as he walks in the door, ready to tell you about something funny that happened during his day. But the moment he hears soft sobbing coming from the bedroom, his mood shifts entirely. His heart aches at the sound, and he immediately heads toward you, his earlier excitement forgotten.
When he sees you crying, his playful demeanor is replaced by quiet concern. He kneels beside the bed, his brow furrowed in worry as he gently calls your name.
“Hey, hey, what’s wrong? Talk to me, love.”
Though his instinct is to crack a joke to cheer you up, he knows better than to do that right away. Instead, he focuses on being present for you, letting you feel whatever you need to feel.
Su-bong’s approach is a mix of gentle affection and lighthearted attempts to make you smile. He’ll wrap you in a warm hug, one hand stroking your back while the other holds your hand. If you don’t pull away, he presses a soft kiss to your temple and whispers:
“I don’t know what’s going on, but I’m here. You don’t have to do this alone.”
If you’re unresponsive, he doesn’t push but stays close, his presence steady and reassuring.
He’s incredibly tactile, holding you close and wiping away your tears with the sleeve of his shirt (despite you protesting that he’ll ruin it). His touch is gentle, and his hugs feel safe and secure.
Su-bong’s words are soft and soothing, filled with unconditional love and support. If you eventually share what’s wrong, he listens attentively, nodding along and offering comforting words when needed. He’s also not afraid to be vulnerable with you, admitting that it hurts him to see you cry.
“You don’t have to explain, but if you ever want to, I’ll be here, okay?”
Once you start to feel better, Su-bong’s playful side re-emerges. He might crack a light joke or do something silly to make you smile, but he’ll also make sure you’re comfortable—bringing you snacks, cuddling with you, or watching something lighthearted to lift your spirits.
374 notes · View notes
charmedimsure · 3 days ago
Note
could you do a jun ho fic where the f!reader is a new officer and he's training her. she is fully convinced that he hates her (maybe she isn't the best at her job) but at the end of the week he asks her out and she's so shocked. turns out he was dropping hints the whole time and she's an idiot
A Tough Case to Crack
Tumblr media
pairing: Hwang Jun-ho x f!reader
summary: No matter what you do, you just cannot get on Jun-ho's good side. Normally you'd brush it off, if he wasn't the man who decides whether you get promoted to detective or not.
word count: 2.7k
warnings: police work, murder case, guns
A/N: i love this request sm omg. everything i know about detective work is from brooklyn 99 so i doubt it's very accurate. if you find any mistakes no you didn't <3
When you found out that the detective training you was none other than Hwang Jun-ho, you were ecstatic. You've worked with him a few times before, doing general beat cop tasks for his cases and seeing him around the precinct.
Not only is he an extremely respected detective, he's also really cute. You hate to be the girl at work who's fawning over one of the boys, but come on. You have eyes.
Now though, as you're sitting in the squad car together staking out a suspect for one of his cases, you're starting to wish you had gotten assigned to anyone else.
You've spent nearly two hours together and you can count the number of words he's said to you on one hand. He's barely even looked at you. It's not like you were friends before, but you've worked together since you got transferred to the precinct a few months ago. And now this man will be the deciding factor in whether you get the detective promotion or go back to being a beat cop.
About a week later, Jun-ho approaches you. "We've been assigned a case. Small, straightforward, perfect for training. Get ready, we're gonna head over to the scene. I'll give you a run down on the way over."
You nod, a smile on your face. It may be small, but it's your first case as a detective and you're excited to prove yourself. This may be your first case, but it will not be your last.
"Cool. Let me grab my stuff, I'll meet you at the car in a few minutes."
Jun-ho gives you a curt nod and turns, walking back to his desk to get his things.
You let out a sigh. Maybe it wasn't the best idea to describe a case as 'cool'.
<>
You grimace at the gruesome sight in front of you. A man's body lays on the ground, blood splattered all around the room. A gun lies in his hand.
"First impression," Jun-ho says, taking out his notepad, "suicide."
You take a step closer, wanting to get a better look at the scene. As you try to take another step, a hand grabs your arm, yanking you back.
"Watch where you're stepping!" Jun-ho's voice booms at you. You look down to notice that you had, in fact, been very close to stepping directly in the victim's blood, which would have messed up the evidence badly.
You look down at your boots, embarrassed that you almost made such a rookie mistake. "Sorry, I'll be more careful." You step closer to the body, but his hand is still keeping you in your place. You huff. "I'm not going to step in the blood, you can let go."
He looks down at his hand and quickly releases your arm, allowing you to approach the scene, this time being extra cautious to make sure you don't disturb anything. You crouch down by the man's head, examining the wound.
Jun-ho gives you a questioning look. "What's wrong?"
You shake your head. "Something just feels off to me."
He continues jotting down notes. "Take a look around the place. I'm gonna talk to the wife. Please be careful not to touch anything. Wear gloves if you have to."
You sigh as he walks away. You had wanted to do this together, to learn how an investigation is done as a detective. He probably thinks you're incompetent now. Looks like you're gonna be working separately.
You take a quick scan over the interior of the room, trying to find little clues that may give you a hint as to what happened here. The house looks normal enough (save for the dead man on the floor, of course). Looking towards the windows, you notice that they are all locked, except for one. It could be nothing, but you write it down in your own notebook anyway, not wanting to overlook anything. You'll be damned if you make another mistake.
Jun-ho walks away from the victim's wife, who is crying outside the home.
"Hey, I might have found something," you jog up to him. "All of the windows are locked except one. Seems a little off to me."
Jun-ho sighs. "I don't think that's something to focus on until we get more evidence." He puts his notepad back in his pocket. "Come on, we gotta go back to the precinct."
You feel yourself deflate at his comment, slowly following him to the car.
<>
You march into your chief's office, hands on your hips. "Chief, I'd like to put in a request for a different trainer."
The man looks up at you from the plate of food on his desk. "Why?"
"Because I know that Detective Hwang is going to give me a bad review," you huff. "If I had done badly, I'd accept it, but I can't help it that he doesn't like me."
He gives you a questioning look. "Why do you say that?"
"I don't think he's said one nice thing to me," you rant. "He doesn't talk to me unless he absolutely has to, he barely even acknowledges that I'm there! The only time he talks to me is to criticize me. He doesn't even work with me on our case!" You stop, catching your breath from you long tirade. "You could have assigned anyone to train me, why did you have to choose him?"
The chief cocks an eyebrow at you. "When he found out you were applying to become a detective, Detective Hwang personally requested to train you."
You look at your chief as if he has three heads. "What?"
He picks up a piece of chicken from his plate, bringing it to his mouth. "He said he saw potential in you, wanted to work with you." He looks up at you again. "He hasn't said anything bad about you or your performance. He's actually said you're doing very well."
Your head feels crazy as you try to process this information. The detective training you, the one that hates you, doesn't actually hate you. He asked to train you and praises you to the chief.
"But why would he do that? He acts like he can't stand me."
The chief shrugs. "You're training to be a detective. Solve the case."
You deadpan at him as a smirk grows on his face. "You're so proud of yourself for that one, aren't you?"
"Absolutely I am. Now, get back to your case." He points at the door with his chopsticks. You can't help but let out a small laugh as you walk back to the bullpen.
<>
The next day, you're sitting at Jun-ho's desk, looking through the files on your victim. A crumb from the sandwich you're eating falls onto one of the photos of the crime scene and you quickly flick it away.
"What are you looking at?"
You jump a bit in your seat. Jun-ho is standing over you, looking at the files in your hands. You put your hand on your chest, steadying your breath.
"Holy shit, you scared the crap out of me."
He gives you a barely there smile. "Sorry." You watch his eyes move to the sandwich in your hand and any trace of the smile he once worse disappears.
You sigh. "I know I'm not supposed to be eating on the job, but I was so hungry that I couldn't focus." You put the remainder of the sandwich on the napkin. "And in my defense, it worked. I think I found something," you say, moving over so he can get a better look. You look up at him. "Do you want your chair?"
"No, it's fine," he says, leaning over you to inspect the files. You can feel the heat radiating off of him, making you stiffen.
"Take a look at this," you point to a description of the victim to Jun-ho. "He was left-handed." You then pick up a picture of the body, handing it to him. "Look where the gun is."
He takes the picture, his eyes widening when he realizes it. "It's in his right hand." He puts the photo down, looking down at you. "You said one of the windows was unlocked, right?"
You nod.
Jun-ho grabs his jacket off the back of the chair you're sitting in. "Go get your jacket. We gotta go back to the house."
<>
You slam the door to the squad car, rushing behind Jun-ho as he moves toward the house. "Which window was unlocked?"
"The middle one on the side."
You run to the side of the house, stopping a few feet away from the window. "This one here."
Jun-ho crouches down. The window is over a small flowerbed, the area covered in mulch that couldn't have been laid down more than a week ago.
You hear Jun-ho gasp. "Here! A footprint!"
You come closer, crouching near him. Sure enough, the print of a large shoe is visible in the mulch, leading away from the window.
"You were right," the man next to you says. "This is a murder."
<>
You stand by the coffee machine, brewing a cup for the woman waiting by Jun-ho's desk. He had reached out to the victim's widow, hoping to get some information that could lead to her husband's killer.
You see Jun-ho leaving the Chief's office and call him over. "Do you want to handle the questions?"
"No, I think we should do it together," he says. "I want your opinion, too."
You try to fight the smile growing on your face, nodding. Jun-ho leads you to his desk, pulling up a chair for you to sit in. You place the cup in front of the woman, as well as a tiny bowl with creamers and sugar.
"Thank you for coming in, ma'am," Jun-ho says.
"Is everything alright?" she asks.
"We just want to ask you a few questions," he says. "We've been going over your husband's case and we have reason to believe that this was a murder staged to look like a suicide."
The woman gasps, bringing a hand up to her mouth as her eyes water. "I knew it," he softly cries, "I knew my Jin-young wouldn't have killed himself. We don't even own a gun, and he was such a happy man."
You shift forward in your seat, grabbing the box of tissues from beside Jun-ho's computer and placing them in front of her. She nods a thank you as she takes one. "Ma'am, is there anyone who you think could have done this? Had anything happened recently?"
She takes a moment to think. "I know he was having arguments with a man he worked with, I don't know his name though."
"Do you know what they argued about?"
"One of them was going to be promoted," she explains. "The promotion would give a significant pay raise. The other man had been there for longer, but Jin-young was likely to get it. He was a very likable man, a very good worker, so nice to everyone. The other man though that he deserved it more."
You write down the details in your notebook. Jun-ho leans forward. "Thank you, ma'am. We'll be in contact."
<>
You walk into the building, looking for the suspect. You had done some research and found that the man you're looking for is Kun Yong-ja, a man with a history of assault.
"Ready?" Jun-ho asks you. You nod, and he knocks on the door of the apartment.
The door opens, revealing your suspect. "Can I help you?"
"Hello, sir. We're with the police. We were hoping we could ask you a few questions," Jun-ho says.
The man's face falters for a moment. "About what?"
You pick up a photo of the victim, turning it to show him. "We're aware that you worked with Mun Jin-young. He was found dead in his home a few days ago."
Yong-ja looks between the two of you before slamming the door shut.
"Shit," you say, taking your gun out of its holster.
Jun-ho kicks in the door, taking his gun out as well. You follow him into the apartment. You run to the back, finding a window open by the fire escape.
"I'll follow him down this way, you go around, try to cut him off," Jun-ho tells you.
You nod, rushing out the door and down the stairs. Leaving the building and turning into the alley beside it, you see the back of Yong-ja, who is currently pointing a gun at your partner. As Jun-ho tries to talk him down, you sneak up behind him. With all your strength, you hit his head with the butt of your gun, knocking him unconscious.
"Thank you," Jun-ho says. He takes the handcuffs off his belt, securing them around Yong-ja's wrists.
As the beat cops bring him to the station, you and Jun-ho check his apartment. Sure enough, you find mulch-covered boots that perfectly fit the prints left in the victim's yard, as well as a small book with information on the victim, including his home address.
<>
"Hey."
You turn, seeing Jun-ho walking up to you. You give him a tight-lipped smile. "Hi."
"The chief asked me to give this to you," he smiles as he hands you a small leather booklet.
You take it and open it, gasping when you see what's inside. The right side is blank, but the left holds a badge, the words "National Police Agency" engraved on it.
"Holy shit," you say, a big smile on your face. "I got it! I'm a detective!" You're so happy that you throw yourself at him, wrapping your arms around him in an unexpected hug. You feel him tense and pull back. "Sorry, I'm just really happy."
"It's fine," he chuckles. "Actually, this is something that I wanted to talk to you about."
Great, here we go. He's going to tell you how you need to be more professional, that you can't make mistakes while in the field.
"Now that I'm not your superior anymore," he smiles, leaning closer to you, "I was wondering if you want to get dinner with me this weekend?"
Wait, what?
You stare at him for a good ten seconds, mind processing the words that just came out of his mouth. You open your mouth and close it a few times before you're finally able to come up with some words. "Like, as in a date?"
"Yeah, a date. If that's alright."
You continue to stare at him, absolutely baffled.
He starts to shrink, his face dropping. "Please don't feel like you have to. It's okay if you don't want to, I won't hold it against you."
"No!" you blurt out. "I mean, yes, I would love to get dinner with you." You smile at him. "Sorry, I just honestly was not expecting that at all."
"Really?" he asks, brows furrowed. "I feel like I've been kind of obvious about it. I mean, I could barely look at you at first because you made me so nervous. One day I finally got the courage to ask you to lunch, but you were already eating and that plan went out the window."
It finally clicks in your brain. Everything you had assumed he'd done because he hated you, not talking to you and giving you looks when you ate at his desk, it was because he liked you.
"But I made mistakes," you say. "I almost stepped in the victim's blood."
Jun-ho chuckles. "My first case, I put filed a knife under the wrong case, would've blown the entire thing if someone hadn't noticed. I got a good yelling at, and now I always make sure I file evidence correctly. I can guarantee you will always be careful around crime scenes, now."
He's right. After that, you had been much more careful. "Damn," you say, "I really got this wrong."
"Yeah, maybe I shouldn't have recommended you for detective," he teases.
You lightly slap his arm. "No take backs!" You gasp. "Wait, is that why you requested to train me?"
Jun-ho blushes, looking to the floor and kicking his shoes. "The Chief told you about that, did he?" He looks up. "And I'm guessing that you asked for a different trainer because you thought I didn't like you?"
"Man, the Chief really can't keep his mouth shut, huh?" you chuckle.
"Not at all," Jun-ho says. "So, I'll pick you up Saturday night?"
You nod, smiling. "It's a date."
~
Squid Game Tags: @thebiggestigurosimp @vvnbxz @lov3yy @miltzzy @l5byrinth @come-as-you-are-111 @starkeyszn @learninglinesintherainn @galactict3a
Lmk if you want to be added to the taglist :)
376 notes · View notes
Text
Tumblr media
Epilogue: I Don't Want To Lose Your Lovelight
Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV, Soldier Boy POV
Summary:  When you decided to work with Butcher and his merry band of supe hunters to take down Homelander, you never expected to be saddled with a sullen, grumpy, jerk like Soldier Boy when the job was done. The more you're around him the more you hate him, but you can't help but wonder, is he really as big a jerk as you think? Reader is a supe with plant powers. This takes place in an AU about a month after the end of The Boys Season 3, in which Butcher has let Soldier Boy continue to work with him on his team. 
Tropes: Enemies to Lovers, Slow Burn, Age Difference (Reader is in her 20s), Soft Ben/ Soldier Boy, Protective Ben/Soldier Boy
Word Count: 10.8K
Warnings: I'm going to label this 18+ because Soldier Boy (he's a warning and everyone knows it), Illusions to past sex, Swearing, Mentions of Sex, Sexual Innuendo, Teasing, Fluff, LOVE, Talks of Pregnancy/thinking about pregnancy, little bit of self-deprecating thought. Ben/Soldier Boy might be a little bit OOC.
Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!
Internal monologue is in italics and is in first person.
Listen While You Read🪴: Lovelight by ABBA
Spotify Playlist 🪴
Series Masterlist
Main Masterlist
A/N: Well here we are... The people have spoken and I will be leaving the happy version as is! Enjoy!
Tumblr media
One Year Later
“I don’t understand why we need to have a realtor to look at apartments. Why can’t we just camp out in front of a nice apartment building and wait for an ambulance to wheel someone out like everyone else?” You huff looking down at the apartment listing on your phone that Ben was taking you to. “Or better yet, we could use Apartments.com. I trust Jeff Goldblum with my life.”
Who doesn't? The man is a national treasure.
"The guy from the movie about the dinosaurs?" Ben asks easing his car into traffic before taking a right.
Sunlight filtered through the windshield and down onto your lap illuminating the embroidered patches of flowers on your favorite blue jeans, the same jeans that were getting just a little tight at the top and the ones you wouldn't be able to wear for the next 6 months or so. You smile to yourself at the thought, and drop your left hand to your stomach that was just starting to swell beneath your botanical printed t-shirt, brushing a thumb over the soft fabric.
This year had been full of surprises, some good, some bad, but you didn’t care. Through the good and the bad, Ben had been there for you just as you had been there for him.
If someone had asked you what you thought your life was going to look like, it wouldn't have been this, but you were so blindingly happy that you didn't care. Ben might not have been the person that you imagined yourself with, but that was the funny thing about love, it could come with whispered breaths, soft caresses, and gentle promises or sneak up behind you and hit you over the back of the head with a frying pan.
There was no in between and your ears were still ringing from when it smacked you.
Ben quit his job at Vought over the phone the morning after the two of you finally realized what you should have known the moment you let Ben stay in your apartment the first time. It had been surreal waking up with him in your bed, his body hard and unyielding, curved around yours as if he wished to protect you while he was asleep. It was the same way you remembered from the morning you woke up with him on the couch when Darren was crashing in your room.
That night had seemed so far away then, an unpleasant flicker of emotion swelling when you thought of your brother, but then dissipated the longer you stared at Ben.
In the sweet relief of sleep he looked younger. His dark hair fell forward into his face, his bearded cheek laid gently on the pillow, and his usual frown pulled down into a neutral expression, but he looked just as handsome as he always did. Ben hadn't woken up until you raised his hand to your mouth and kissed the inside of his palm gently. And the smile he gave you when he did made you wish to exist in that moment with him forever. The look on his face then was so unlike the man you'd seen in the heat of battle the first time you met and everything like the man you'd fallen in love with.
Stan Edgar had been furious, said that Ben was purposely trying to make him look bad, but Ben didn't give a fuck what Stan thought of him, the only thing he cared about was curled against his chest, and was holding his hand to her lips.
Jake opened up the new plant shop re-named "Please Don't Die The Revenge," a title Jake and you had thought up after drinking way too many brightly colored margaritas at happy hour while Ben sulked and wished he was anywhere else.
However, Ben thought it was adorable how much of a light weight you were, and lead you home while you made jokes, giggled, and whispered things into his ear that only tested his restraint. Your boyfriend might be a lot of things, but he didn't want to take advantage of you when you were like that, especially not when you couldn't remember that you had feet and wouldn't stop crying until he took your shoes off and showed you that you still had them.
When Jake re-opened the shop, he insisted that you were going to be a partner, not an employee, and when he'd told you, you'd burst into tears while Ben grumbled under his breath something not worth repeating. Ben still didn't like Jake, and despite your numerous insistences for Ben to be nice, Ben was just as sullen around him as he had been since the first day they met. However, now Jake was used to it so you no longer felt the need to apologize.
You'd also decided to retire from working with Butcher, something that Ben wholeheartedly agreed with, especially now that you were pregnant. Sometimes you'd help out with something on the computer, but never in taking down a supe. It made you happier to work in the plant shop anyway, but didn't make you worry any less about Ben or everyone else.
The shop was doing well, and on weekends the store partnered with other businesses to host a block wide farmer's market, where you sold fruit, vegetables, dried herbs, hand crocheted goods, and jars of jam while Jake took the weekend off to visit his new girlfriend that he'd met when he went home for Christmas.
Ben may or may not have encouraged Jake to call her and you were sure it was so that Jake didn't get any ideas about how much time the two of you were spending together. You had an inkling that Ben still believed that you liked Jake no matter how many times that you proved to Ben you didn't.  You didn’t think that there was any competition between Ben and Jake, not when being with Ben made you feel alive in the best way and being with Jake was like being with an overactive golden doodle.
However, despite how many times you told Ben that he didn't need to come with you on his days off, he would sit beside you frowning, but following your movements with his eyes while you helped customers. Every so often you'd see a half-smile twitch on the end of his lips, happy that you were happy- but not happy to be there. It was a theme with your boyfriend, but you knew it stemmed from how much he loved you. Being in the plant shop and seeing Jake reminded you of that, because Ben had made sure that the shop re-opened for you and he had saved Jake's life for you. Ben had done more for you in the time that you'd been together than anyone else that you'd allowed into your life and into your bed.
Ben was it for you, and you were going to prove it every day for the rest of your life to him if that was what it took.
Days at the farmer’s market were fun. You would close down for an hour so Ben and you could wander to different booths to see what everyone else was selling.
Those days always felt normal. It reminded you of the farmer's market that your hometown had each Saturday and the same ones you dragged Annie to at the crack of dawn to get the first sample of freshly churned honey butter or the first sample of strawberry ice cream. When Ben and you walked hand in hand through the crowded marketplace stopping along the way to sample fruit, cheese, honey, and whatever else you could find with the warm sun on you back, it was the happiest you'd ever felt.
It was what you'd always wanted, the kind of relationship you’d longed to have for so long, the same one you’d seen growing up with your parents and grandparents, and the one you'd thought you'd never have.
You could see yourself marrying Ben. Odd given the first time you met, you'd thought he was just a big grumpy brute of a man with the attitude of a caveman and the impatience of a toddler. But now things were different, Ben was your caveman with an impatience of a toddler, and you'd never felt this way about anyone else.
You'd never wanted anyone like you wanted Ben and couldn't see a future without him in it. Even in the earlier months the two of you were dating, you could see your life unfolding before your eyes. It felt crazy because you’d never been one to rush into anything, but with Ben the things that used to hold you back from jumping into the great unknown disappeared.
These days the unknown seemed to grow larger and larger by the minute, but instead of feeling uncomfortable about not knowing, you felt free.
Of course, the pregnancy was holding the gold medal for biggest source of the unknown.
It had been a surprise to find out that you were pregnant two and a half months ago. Not completely, given how enthusiastic, insatiable, and eager your boyfriend was when it came to sex or really how you were when it came to him.
In all honesty, you couldn't blame it all on Ben.
You were just as responsible for this as him given how much you seemed to want him all the time. Surprising, because you were never like this with your high school boyfriend or in any of the other sporadic relationships you'd had in the past, but you supposed that it was just Ben, that there was something about him that made you lose all sense of self-control. You also figured that you let the self-control drive long enough when you refused to admit how much you cared about him and now you owed it to yourself to throw it all out the window and lose yourself in everything he was.  
That being said, you were terrified the moment you found out you were pregnant. Ben had been away on a mission and you'd had to wait a week for him to get back while you sat with your grandmother on your couch for days. You hadn't wanted to tell Ben yet and especially not over the phone.
It didn't seem like something you said over the phone anyway.
Your grandmother had shown up a few hours after you took the seventh test, because you hoped that there was some kind of mistake with the first six. She'd seen the future before you had a chance to pick up the phone and give her a call, but you were grateful that she was there.
You needed her.
Annie would have come too, but she was out of town on the same mission that Ben was. And you were afraid to call for fear that Ben would hear you say it over the phone with his supe hearing. Texting her that you were pregnant meant that it would be in print somewhere with evidence and you didn't want the possibility of Ben seeing it on Annie's phone.
That last part seemed a little far fetched, because you didn't know why Ben would have Annie's phone, but you were allowing yourself to have a mini-freak out, you were pregnant.
But no matter how many scenarios you discussed with your grandmother, it always came back to one thing, you loved Ben and you wanted to have a baby with him. You just weren't sure of the timing.
The two of you had only been together for ten months then, and although you couldn't imagine yourself with anyone else, you were hesitant.
Ben was still adjusting to everything in the future and introducing a kid into his life could be chaotic and messy. You also weren't sure if it was a good idea given how insane Ben's life had been for the past forty years and how hard you were trying to give him a sense of normalcy in the time you'd been together.
But then you'd thought about it more.
The shop was doing well, you loved Ben, he loved you, you did want kids, and you were so happy that it made you believe that it was the right time.
Ben had been excited when you told him, but then you both realized the bigger dilemma, your apartment. It was already small with the two of you, Rex, and Bean. Ben didn't fit in the shower or in your bed and he barely fit in your kitchen when the two of you were standing in it, which meant that adding a kid to the mix would only make the apartment smaller.
You'd looked at an apartment five months ago, only because you saw how excited he was about something so mundane and it made your heart warm to see that he wanted to build a life with you, but you had hated the apartment. It reminded you of the terrible one he'd had at Vought.
And the one Ben was taking you to see today wasn't much better. This was number seventeen and you didn't have high hopes.
Ben takes a left turn, going over a speed bump that you somehow can't feel inside the cab.  His car was fancier than what you were used to and brand new. Ben had proudly told you that they weren't selling them in the United States yet, which begged the question: how in the hell had he gotten it? It had enough switches inside to make you fear about the probability of an ejector seat.
The first time he’d picked you up in it, you were grateful he’d opened the door for you when you tried to get out because you were sure that it would have taken you twenty minutes to figure that out on your own. You’d thought that Ben would have at least sprung for a car that was more low tech or something that reminded him of the life he had in the past, but no.
And now he was talking about getting another car for you that was higher off the ground to make sure that the baby would be safe. He kept saying how he didn't like you walking around when he wasn't there to go with you and a car would be safer, despite your protests that you liked walking and didn't need a car.
You never thought that Ben would be this overprotective, you should have, given how he acted like a helicopter parent after everything with Elijah, but he was.
The pregnancy only made it worse.
He never let you walk in your neighborhood or to work without him, claiming that it "wasn't safe" as if you weren't a supe and couldn't handle yourself. Whenever you went to the grocery store Ben tagged along frowning at whoever walked by with a shopping cart as if they were a threat. When somebody dropped a glass pickle jar two aisles over a few days ago and Ben had grabbed you and put you behind him so fast it made you dizzy.
Now whenever you tried to leave the apartment, Ben insisted that he could do whatever errand it was that you were going to do faster, and he was always reluctant to leave you at the plant shop, stating that you "shouldn't be lifting things." You'd even caught him reading one of your pregnancy books when he thought you were in the shower and he'd lied and said that it fell on the floor and he was 'just picking it up.' That didn't explain how he knew exactly what you should be eating and what vitamins you needed to take.
But instead of teasing Ben about it, you kept your mouth shut because you thought it was cute how much Ben cared about you and how excited he was about the baby.  You knew that he'd been waiting for this for much longer than you.
You'd woken up a few days ago with Ben's head on your stomach listening to the baby's heart-beat while he thought you were asleep murmuring things under his breath that you couldn’t hear.
It was those moments that made any anxiety you had about being a parent fade, because you knew that you weren't alone in this, that Ben was with you and he wasn't going anywhere.
“He’s an amazing actor and he’s definitely going on the list of people I’m allowed to cheat on you with.” You snort mind flitting to images of Jeff Goldblum lounging on a table clad in black, looking much too sexy for someone who was attacked by a t-rex.
“You realize that no matter how long that list gets you’re still not allowed to do that right?”  Ben glances over at you with a frown.
Ben looked good today. His dark hair was a little longer than usual- he kept saying that he needed to get a haircut but never did-, he was wearing a pair of sunglasses that made him look dangerous and sexy, and the blue jeans he was wearing were some of your favorites. They were worn in just right and each time Ben wore them it made it difficult for you to form a single sentence. Of course, the thing that made you want to jump his bones even more was the fact that Ben was wearing the dark green sweater you made him for Christmas.
You had been so scared to give it to him, but since that day, Ben wore it whenever he could, and whenever the two of you were out and he would get a compliment, because he always did, Ben would say proudly "my girlfriend made it for me."
“Sure. Just like I’m sure that no matter how long that list gets for you, if you ever cheat on me I’ll castrate you.” You reply, scrolling to a different listing on your phone. This one had a nice view of Central Park, but the living room looked big enough to park four SUV's in. It was too much, too big, and too cold.
No matter how many different apartments you looked at in person or online, you never seemed to find one that felt like home. In each one you'd found something that you didn't agree with, whether it be the bathroom, the lack of a washer/dryer, the neighborhood, or the layout, nothing felt right and you were starting to worry. At this rate you were sure that your child would be old enough to move out before the two of you found somewhere to live. You wanted a place that reminded you of your home back in Illinois with your grandmother, someplace that felt warm, someplace that you could see yourself raising a family, and something that felt permanent.
Your fingers go to the locket around your neck, rubbing your thumb over the cool metal surface, tracing the grooves and pattern on the front to ease your anxiety. It had been Ben's mother's, one of the only things that he had left of her, but it was something that he wanted you to have. It was the most important gift that you'd ever gotten in your entire life, because you knew what it represented. Your boyfriend might not be good with his words or expressing his emotions, but this locket said everything he couldn't.
Ben's eyes trace over where you sit. "What's wrong Petals?"
"Nothing-"
Ben sighs "You've got that scrunch between your eyebrows sweetheart. We both know you can't lie to me."
You hesitate. "I don't like that we haven't found a place yet."
"That why you can't sleep?"
You bite the inside of your cheek and look down at your lap. You didn't know that Ben had noticed how you weren't sleeping well and it had nothing to do with not being able to find an apartment.
At first you thought that it was the pregnancy, as if the almost constant morning sickness wasn't enough, making you have worse dreams than normal was the icing on top of the cake. You'd had nightmares in the past about your parents, but these dreams were different. They were all about your brother Darren and each time he stood in front of you his skin and flesh melted away leaving nothing more than a flickering outline that buzzed and popped like a hot stove before it fizzled up and disappeared.
You had no idea what it meant, but you didn’t want to bring it up to Ben, not when he was so happy. So you choose not to answer his question.
"We're going to find a place, this just takes time." He continues.
"Not for me. Not usually. I chose my last apartment within a weekend-"
"And look at how shitty it is!" Ben huffs. "I can't believe that you lived there as long as you did without getting mugged."
"I am able to handle myself. And if you recall you have seen me fight off muggers."
Ben's frown deepens. "Don't remind me." You watch his eyes flick down to where your hand rests gently on your abdomen. "Look Petals, I know you like our apartment, but it's not just us anymore."
"I know."
"I don't want to raise our kid in that building with Mike blowing out my fucking eardrums every morning. And I could do without his mother trying to hump my leg like a bitch in heat every time I take out the trash."
Your eyes water just a little when Ben says the word ‘our.’ It solidified the thought that you weren’t alone in this, that Ben wasn’t going to leave you. You didn't really believe that he would, but it was nice to be reminded once in a while.
"Aww she's your biggest fan. And I seem to remember you being into older women before we were together-"
"And I seem to remember you saying that you would castrate me if I cheated on you."
"I will castrate you, but Mike's mother doesn't count. She's your hall pass, just like Jeff Goldblum is mine."
"No, he's not."
"Debatable."
"Petals." Ben growls, throwing you a dark look from over the console that sends a shiver down your spine.
Before Ben you never thought that jealousy was attractive, didn't think that it was cute when your high school boyfriend Newton got jealous when someone else talked to you, but Ben could make even the most annoying things look sexy.
"You should keep your eyes on the road Gramps, wouldn't want to get in an accident."
"I don't fucking care. Keep talking like that sweetheart and I'm going to pull the car over and make sure that my name is the only one on those perfect lips."
You arch an eyebrow in a silent challenge. "Promise?"
"And you say it's me that always gets us into trouble." Ben chuckles with a dark look.
The car comes to a stop and you turn away from Ben's hypnotic gaze to stare out the window, expecting to see the beautiful all glass front of the apartment that was way out of your price range, but instead the car is sitting outside a house in quiet neighborhood overhung with large trees that weave together in a canopy over the street.
The house is three stories, made of red brick, the small yard in front is fenced with black wrought iron with a garden box lying beyond the metal spikes where someone has tried to grow plants, but was not having any success. There's a dark painted archway over the black door that boldly has the number of the home written in gold, and a large round window dominates the space to the left of the door cut into the red brick, that is partially obscured by a mass of tangled vines which cling to the outside of the house.
"So we're going to have sex in your car outside of this house? Feels like the homeowner's association will have a field day." You watch a couple walk past with matching dalmatians and cashmere sweaters. "Or we'd get arrested for public indecency when fido and fido's girlfriend call 911."
"Maybe later."
"Well then why did you stop? Did you get lost?" You turn to look at him. "It's okay if you did, I won't make fun of you-" You pause. "Never mind, I can't promise that."
Ben rolls his eyes. "No, I didn't get lost. I wanted you to see this place."
"Ben this is a house." You emphasize the word, your eyes widening. "Remember when we had the conversation about trying to get an apartment so I could at least help you with the rent."
It had been an awkward conversation, you felt bad about making him try to reign in something that made him so excited.
Now that you were part owner of the plant shop you were getting a little more money and didn't need to rely so heavily on Ben, but you still didn't like taking his money. Your grandmother had always instilled in you the importance of being independent and you'd never relied on someone the way you relied on Ben.
You'd always felt the need to prepare yourself for the worst, for having a back up plan if things didn't work out, and you were realizing just how much weight you put on your shoulders each day. Ben wanted to lighten the load, you knew that, but you were trying your best to put more trust in him, inching out from beneath the piano on your shoulders by letting him do more and more for you.
It was still hard.
"Petals." Ben touches your cheek, eyes softening and making your next words dry up. He didn't often do things like that in public, but each time he did it made you feel like warm butter on a hot stove.
When Ben had started calling you that a year ago it annoyed you to no end, but now he said it affectionately, with love and hope in his eyes, and it stirred something deep down.
"Let’s just look at this one. And if you don't like it, I promise I'll drive to whatever apartment you want me to okay?"
"But it's a-" You protest, but you lean into his touch.
"I know it's a house."
"Are you sure? They say that the eyes are the first thing to go, especially with someone your age Gramps."
He huffs out a breath in annoyance. "I don't know why I put up with this shit."
"Because you loooveee me." You coo poking his cheek.
The look in Ben's eyes softens again, slowly tracing down your form to your belly again, before coming back up to your face. "Only because you annoy me so much."
"Exactly." You reach for what you believe is the door handle and Ben's smile drops into a frown.
You retract your hand. “It’s not the door handle is it?”
“Not in case you want to crawl out the window.”
“I do like to make an entrance.”
“You always do baby. Even when you’re not trying.” Ben winks and gets out of the car, walking around the back to open the door for you.
“Thank you.” You say taking his hand without hesitation.
The house looks even bigger when you gaze up at it from the sidewalk, but you can't help but admit that the house is beautiful in it's own way. It has more character than the other ones on the street that look like carbon copies of one another. It wore it's weirdness like a badge of honor, just like you always had.
And even with the small garden out front filled with dead plants that rot in the wooden garden box and the tangled vines that cover the circular front window, you can see the potential it has.
"I like the trees." You say, gesturing with the hand that's not holding on to Ben's at the canopy of large oak trees over the road that block the brilliant sunlight and leave the imprint of their outstretched branches on the pavement.
"I thought you would." Ben squeezes your hand.
"So where's our realtor?" You glance around the empty road for the sleek black Mercedes that "Tina," aka the most nosy woman in the world and your realtor, drove, but you don't see it.
"She said that she wanted to give us some space." He tugs you forward, opening the gate as he does.
"Thank God. If she tried to touch my stomach one more time or eye fuck you when she thought I wasn't looking, I was going to perform open heart surgery on her with her stilettos."
"Would have loved to see that Petals. Maybe I should have let her come today."
"Do you remember how strong Homelander was? Because I'm about to show you that he was nothing compared to a pregnant woman scorned." You warn, but Ben only laughs at you.
Your gaze falls to the attempted garden. Rosebushes, lavender, tulips, and many other flowers lie in states of decay choked with weeds, while other plants that you can't identify lie shriveled up and brown on the darkened soil. It tugs at your heart to see them that way, unloved and uncared for, left to curl up and die.
You feel your eyes shift to green calling forth the flowers, bringing them to the light, drawing them upwards to unfurl in the light of the sun and absorb the healing rays. The plants brighten and explode with pops of color that fuse the front of the house with new life and jasmine flowers bloom along the ivy that crawls up the side of the house sending the comforting smell over you as it takes on a more controlled woven tapestry rather than the chaotic snarl it was moments ago. Bougainvillea stretches up to weave itself above the front door, the dark red blooms contrasting with the black door. The circular window winks at you, and through the glass you can just barely see a hint of lightly painted walls beyond.
Your gaze falls to the small area in front of the house.
You could see yourself out here wearing your gardening hat with Bean and Rex sunning themselves in the sunlight while you weed with sweat sticking your shirt to your back and while dirt stains your fingers. Your eyes flick to the empty front steps, imagining Ben and you sitting there with cups of coffee steaming beside the two of you, with your head against his shoulder reading the paper he has open in front of him.
No, not thinking that. This is a house. Ben and I are looking for an apartment.
"Couldn't help yourself could you Petals?" Ben murmurs, dragging your attention back to him.
"No. Though I might want a commission from helping the seller with the curb appeal."
Ben rolls his eyes, but pulls you up the cheerful concrete steps to the black door before he takes a key from his pocket.
You eye it suspiciously.
"Tina gave it to me." He says with a shrug.
"That better be the only thing she gave you." Your eyes narrow, thinking of all the things that Tina could have done to your boyfriend when you weren't around.
"Jealous?" Ben's smile slips into a smirk. "Need I remind you of all the things you said you were going to let Jeff Goldblum do to you?"
"Need I remind you about the threat of castration?"
Ben leans down towards you, his breath warm against your ear, so close that you could smell his cologne. "We both know that you like what I do to you too much to cut it off Petals, especially now."
A pleasurable shiver traces your spine with his words and as much as you hated to admit it, Ben was right. As insatiable as you'd been for Ben before you were pregnant, now it had only multiplied ten fold.
In the first few weeks of your pregnancy you couldn’t have imagined wanting to have sex with Ben, the near constant morning sickness, swollen breasts, and nausea left little to be desired, but as you slowly began to inch into your second trimester you felt a change. It was like a switch had flipped. Yes the morning sickness came in waves, but your hormones bumped around inside from sick, to sad, to angry, to loving, to aroused so fast it didn’t matter for long and you were both reaping the benefits. Ben was eager to help you in any way he could and due to his supe enhancements he was able to keep up and keep you more than happy.
You fist your hand in the front of his shirt to pull his face down to yours, lips inches apart, your eyes narrowed, but pupils blown with lust. "Don't tease me right now Gramps."
"Wouldn't dream of it doll." Ben purrs, his eyes darkening.
Fuck.
You didn’t want to give in, but whenever Ben looked at you like that it made your skin heat and your heartbeat feel like thunder, vibrating through your entire body.
Ben leans towards you, but just before your lips touch his, he scoops you up into his arms and crosses the threshold.
“Ben what the hell are you doing?” You laugh, pushing at his chest.
“What? Was I not supposed to carry you across?” He pretends to be surprised.
“That’s only if we’re married dummy and this isn’t our house.”
“Oh well then it’s good practice.” Ben smirks and finally kisses you, drawing you tighter against his chest for a few precious seconds. It wasn't the kiss you expected a moment ago, this kiss was hungry, but not rushed, passionate, but not aggressive, and yet it was all consuming.
You sigh into his mouth, holding the front of his shirt tightly. You’d never gotten used to how it felt to kiss him, how everything else melted away except for him and you. Even when you’d hated him, Ben still knew exactly how to kiss you to take away all your inhibitions.
You could easily see yourself spending the rest of your life with him. And given the revelation that you potentially could live forever, it meant even more. You know that it made Ben feel good too. That he was relieved that he wouldn’t have to be alone ever again, that he could love someone the way he loved you and be unafraid of losing you.
Ben pulls back a wide smirk on his face. "I'm sorry wasn't that what you wanted? For me to bring you inside?" The look in his eyes shifts to amusement with his taunt. "Or were you thinking about me fucking you against the front door for fido and his girlfriend to see?"
"Shut up." Your cheeks heat in embarrassment that your boyfriend could read you that well.
"Because I didn’t think you were into that kind of thing Petals, but if you want we can go back outside and-"
You force his face down to yours, shutting him up the only way you know how. Ben groans into your mouth as your hands work their way up into his hair to hold him in place, your lips fervently moving against his as the warmth of arousal begins to thrum through your veins and pool in the pit of your stomach.
You pull back out of breath, fingers still tangled in Ben's long hair, your gaze locking on his. Ben's eyes are dark, lips curved up into a knowing smirk that, if Ben wasn't holding you in his arms, would make your legs give out. One of his arms is underneath your knees, but the other is around your chest, and you can feel Ben's hand fitting comfortably over the bump hidden beneath your t-shirt, absorbing the steady thud of your child's heartbeat against the palm of his hand. Something lurked behind the familiar green in his eyes, something that you could feel bubbling up in your own chest the longer you stared at him.
"Come on I want you to see the house." Ben mutters pressing one more kiss against your lips before he gently places you on the hardwood floor.
"I know. Stop distracting me." You say as you flip your hair over your shoulder.
"I'm a wonderful distraction. Wouldn't mind distracting you a little longer." His arm comes up to wrap tight around your waist, pulling your back into his chest. Ben’s lips trail down to your neck, nipping at the smooth flesh of your throat.
“Ben.” You half moan, leaning back into him. "Please."
"I know baby." He hums. "But lets look at the house first. After I'll give you what you need."
"Tease." You mutter under your breath earning a chuckle from Ben.
The two of you are standing in a foyer with a large staircase in front of you that leads to the second and third story of the house. A lightly painted hallway stretches beyond it, and a living room lies to the left through a wide doorway. The interior of the house is a mix of old and new, vintage and modern, with warm colored hardwood floors running throughout, lightly painted walls, and with dark colored wooden baseboards and door frames.
It reminded you of your grandmother's house back in Illinois and even without furniture the inside of this house felt like home. It wasn't drafty, too white, too new, too old, or too cold- it existed in the perfect harmony that Ben and you had been looking for since you started looking for an apartment.
No. This is a house. This is the complete opposite of what Ben and I are looking for.
You remind yourself as you walk into the small room to the left of the front door. There's a giant fireplace on the opposite wall with neatly placed built ins on either side. Natural sunlight came through the large circular window on the front of the house, giving you a view of the garden you'd reinvigorated with new life and the quiet street overhung with trees outside.
You could see yourself reading quietly on a plush armchair in the corner while Bean and Rex sunned themselves on the wooden floors or sitting on a couch and cuddling with Ben under a blanket in front of the fireplace when it got too cold outside, nestling into his warmth to keep the chill at bay.
You drift through the other doorway across from the circular window that leads into a dining room area. It has the same wonderfully natural colored hardwood floor so soft you were sure that it would feel like butter beneath your bare feet. You run a finger tip over the wooden doorway, feeling the smooth, strong wood beneath your hand. You could still see notches in the boards from where another family had measured how tall their children were growing with every passing year and it made you smile to yourself.
This house had character, had a history. It wasn't built in haste to house a population of people who probably would spend more time out than in, it was built with love and care, and had charm. It was what the apartments that Ben and you had seen wasn't.
Ben hovers behind you silently, watching you move through the space with curiosity. He drinking in your expressions and trying to see what you thought. You had no idea how he found this place, not when the two of you had been looking at huge modern apartments in buildings that weren't more than a year old.
The kitchen is even more impressive.
It's modern, with stainless steel appliances, light granite countertops, and a dark green backsplash, but somehow still holds some of the vintage charm that merges seamlessly together with the new appliances.
You could see yourself making jams for the farmer's market at the stove, making dinner for your family or sitting with Annie at the counter with glasses of wine lamenting over everything Hughie and Ben did to annoy the two of you while secretly loving them all the more for it. You could see yourself dancing with Ben to ABBA while the lights were low and he got home from work, just as you had seen your parents do years ago and imagined a vase filled with flowers on the counter that Ben brought home just because he felt like it, not because it was a special occasion. Ben did that for you every week, brought home flowers because he knew how much they made you smile.
"This kitchen is huge!" You exclaim, spreading your arms out to twirl in a circle. "Annie and Hughie could fit in here too!"
Ben frowns at your mention of Hughie.
"What?" You lean over the counter to stare at Ben. "You know that if we get a bigger place they're going to come over for dinner more often right? I'm thinking Friday nights they could come over for dinner and a movie-"
It was a tradition that your parents had started, that Annie and you carried on when they died, and now Ben picked up the slack. Spending Friday nights on the couch under a blanket eating greasy pizza out of the box had seemed like a foreign concept for Ben, but now it was him that always made sure that he was home on Friday nights to make it to movie night so you could cuddle up against him under the warm blankets.
"I think we see them enough." Ben leans on his side of the counter across from you with a frown. "Plus, I thought that you would like a kitchen a little bit bigger to make me dinner."
“Or maybe," You tap your chin as if deep in thought, eyes narrowing. "The kitchen is big enough for you to start pulling your weight. Doing the dishes, cleaning up, trying to make dinner for your pregnant girlfriend-“ You count off on your fingers.
“How long are you going to use that excuse?”
“For the next 7ish months or so."
Ben huffs out a laugh and rolls his eyes at you, while you continue to move through the kitchen.
There's a giant living area just beyond that you can imagine Ben and you sitting on the couch in front of a TV watching another one of his ridiculous films or see you and your child sitting on the couch reading a book together while Ben sits beside you with his arm around your shoulders. You didn't know the sex of the baby, wanted to wait a little longer to see how things progressed before you found out.
But each day it became more real.
You could hear the pitter patter of feet across the floor and the squeals of an imaginary child racing through with Ben hot on their heels trying to catch them, could see a child with a smaller Rex wrapped around the back of their shoulders feeding him bits of strawberries, and could see a child in a highchair while Ben and you tried to feed them spaghetti. Your left hand drops to your belly again as you think of what the future could look like and the longer that you stand inside this house the more you can see yourself living here with Ben, having a life here together.
You hadn't seen that anywhere else that the two of you had gone to see in the past few months. It made all of this even more real.
I'm going to be a mom.
The thought lodged in the back of your throat. You were excited, but you were also a little worried. You didn't know the first thing about being a mom and no matter how many books you read or how many blogs you found, you felt underprepared.
Not to mention you could still remember all the videos that you'd had to watch in middle school about childbirth that were made to scare students into being celibate and it only made your anxiety worse.
"What are you thinking about Petals?" Ben asks, coming around the counter and turning you in his arms. His face is twisted into a concerned frown.
Tears were building behind your eyes now, your emotions getting the best of you. It was easy for you to cry about nothing at all, but this was different. Your future was slipping through your fingers, unfolding in front of you in this house. It reminded you of how you'd felt for the past few years when all you wanted was to fall in love and be loved by someone. The lovesick feeling that followed you around as you tried your best to find a man who would make you happy the way that Hughie made Annie happy, but never seemed to find the right one before you met Ben.
"This place it's perfect, but-"
"But what?" Ben's thumb brushes the tears away, eyes focused on you. Whenever Ben looked at you like that you thought that he could see through you to the pieces that no one else ever cared to uncover.
"It's a house." You breathe leaning into his touch.
"And you don't like it?"
"No, I love it." You whisper, but you feel a little frustrated. "I can see us here. See a ridiculously big Christmas tree in that corner," You point to the living room. "See breakfasts on this counter," you gently slide your hand along the marble countertop. "See us watching movies in the living room on our couch and see our kids running around outside in that back yard." You gesture to the all glass back wall of the house where there's a finished patio and a surprisingly large lawn outside, but stranger is the giant greenhouse that sits just beyond.
"So what's the problem?"
"I mean… it's not what we talked about. Can we even afford this?"
You knew that Ben could afford it, you just weren't sure about you. 
Ben is quiet for a minute, before he takes your hand and tugs you in the direction of the backyard. "I want you to see something."
"Something? The house isn't-"
"There's one more thing." He squeezes your hand and takes you outside.
There is a canopy of trees that shields the patio from the sun overhead that has begun to descend behind the houses on the street, the clouds turning a burnished gold in the light as it says goodbye. 
The two of you follow the path of stones neatly laid in the lush grass, leading to the greenhouse that looks much bigger than it did from inside. It easily reaches to the second story of the house and has a black iron skeleton that holds together the pieces of glass artfully placed in different shapes and sizes.
Ben turns to look at you. "Close your eyes."
"What?"
"Do you trust me Petals?" He looks at you, his green eyes catching yours, wide and open. You knew that he knew the answer to that question, but you also knew that Ben never believed that someone like you could or should trust him.
You promised yourself when the two of you started dating that you would make Ben feel special each day the same way he made you feel special and made Ben understand that you loved him and you weren't going anywhere.
The things that Countess did to him still weighed on his heart, but you were happy to see that after one year with you, Ben was different. He was more open to telling you what he was feeling, (one word answers), he was more open to sharing memories with you, (only a sentence usually), and Ben was getting comfortable using the word "love." It had taken him a solid three months to say it, but Ben didn't need to say it, you knew it was true long before he uttered it aloud.
"Of course I do." You lean into him, your free hand coming to rest on his chest. There was a slight chill on the edge of the wind, a promise of winter, but the warmth of Ben's body shields you from the breeze.
"Then close your eyes." He repeats.
There's something dancing in his expression that you can't place, but your gaze travels down to his shoulders and you realize that Ben is nervous. You'd never seen your boyfriend nervous in a while, the last time was when he gave you the locket that hung between your collar bones.
But you do as he says and he brings you inside. "Okay, open."
When you do, your heart stutters to a stop in shock.
The greenhouse isn't empty. There are rows of citrus trees with lemons, oranges, and tangerines, apple trees with bright red fruit, potted blueberry plants, vegetables, and herb plants sitting on low tables, woven vines of raspberry and blackberry plants on trellises that cover the walls, and a collection of potted strawberry plants one of which is in a pot that looks a lot like the one that Darren broke when he came through the window of your apartment one year ago.
There's a circular staircase to the left of the door that would take you up to a second story where there are even more plants, but also a sitting area that feels warm and bright, and has a fan hanging over to make sure that it stayed just a little cool in the warm month. It would be the perfect place to read and relax, more so than the room inside you noticed when you walked into the house.
On the bottom floor there is a potting bench surrounded by flowering plants pushed against the right wall where new tools hang and colorful pots are placed. There's also an obscene amount of bagged potting soil stacked up higher than you are tall just to the left of it.
You gently lay your hand on the wood of the bench to feel how soft it is. The wood has been sanded down to be smooth as silk and you look to the right to see that next to it, is a identical bench but smaller with tools made of plastic for a child and a small apron that matched the one hanging from a hook fastened to the greenhouse wall.
Is that for-
The thought stutters to a halt. You didn't understand why this was here. A greenhouse in New York City wasn't odd, but the fact that there was one almost two stories tall and contained everything you might need to expand the farmer's market you had grown to love so much at the back of this house was odd.
There's a potted gardenia sitting on top of the bench and the bright smell brings the gentle comfort of home as the delicate flowers bend towards you.
Being in here is the same way you feel whenever you're in the plant shop. You could feel the new life curling beneath the soul, feel the thrum of energy from the plants that turned towards you expectantly, and feel the way your powers reached out to them to offer a healing hand.
"Ben, why is this here?" You ask confused.
 Ben clears his throat. "You know I hate that fucker, but he works fast."
"Who?" You turn to him.
"Jake." Ben says simply. He's leaning against the doorway watching you with an unreadable expression.
"Jake did this?" You gesture to the greenhouse full of plants, enough plants that you would be able to supply the farmer's market each week without batting an eye. Now, you used the plants in your apartment, but there never seemed to be enough to keep up with the demand, but here-
Wait a minute this is crazy. This isn't our house. What the hell is going on?
“I thought you needed a little more product and he told me he’d take care of it.”
"But why was Jake-"
"I figured it out Petals, why none of those other places felt right." He interrupts. "I didn't get it before, why you didn't like the apartments we went to see, why you kept finding something wrong with them. Fuck, I made fun of you for saying shit like 'the ceiling is too high,' but as soon as I found this place I knew it was right."
"What are you talking about?" You still didn't understand why any of this was here.
Why would Ben want Jake to bring all these plants here if we're just looking at this house.
“I lied." Ben crosses his arms over his chest and rolls his shoulders as if it makes him uncomfortable to admit it.
“About what?” You frown.
Ben didn't like lying to you, you knew that, and you liked how brutally honest Ben was about everything.  Trust was a two way street between the two of you, and just as Ben didn't lie to you, you didn't lie to him- well… Ben always seemed to know when you were lying, but that didn't change the fact that you didn't like lying to him.
“I didn’t tell Tina not to come today and we were never going to see that apartment. I told you that to get you to come with me.”
“Why?” You draw out the word still confused.
“Because I already bought this house.” Ben smiles tightly.
“You WHAT?!” You screech eyes widening. “Why?!”
“For the same reason you said Petals, it’s perfect.”
“But- But-" You don't know how to respond to what he's admitted. "You said we were just looking! That this place is-"
Ben shakes his head with a sigh as he takes a step closer to where you stand. "It's funny that I lived this long and still somehow happened to fall in love with someone a little more old-fashioned, but I fucking love that about you, that you're not like anyone else." He reaches across the space to take your hand in his, the warm calloused palm fitting perfectly over yours.
"What does that have to do with the house?”
"Apartments don't feel permanent, not to you, they feel temporary, but a house… it makes this real." Ben swallows. "And I want this to be real."
You blink in confusion, worried about him. "Ben, what are you talking about?" You squeeze his hand trying to comfort him. "This is real." Your free hand comes up to cup his bearded cheek, that prickles against your skin. "I love you. Nothing is going to change that. Not the baby or where we live or-"
"I know that." He laughs. "I mean this." Ben gestures with his free hand to the greenhouse and then back at the home behind the two of you. "There's room for our kid and for as many as you'll let me give you. There's room for Diana, and even though I know she'd rather die in that house in Illinois than move here,  I'm going to try my damndest to get her here so she can be with you. I know how much you miss her. And as much as I hate the idea, there's even room for Annie and fucking Hughie if they want to stay the night." He grumbles with a sigh. "It's a good neighborhood, so I won't have to worry about you getting mugged or some shit when I'm stuck with that British fuck somewhere else, and it's close to schools that my old man would have probably liked, but I want our kids to be safe and have a good education."
“But-“
“I know it’s a house.” Ben breathes. “But just listen for a minute.”
You swallow the lump in the back of your throat, more tears building in your eyes. It was hard to be angry with him over something that you wanted as much as he did. And the truth was, you weren't angry with him for buying the house. It again represented the one thing that you'd told Ben that night at Vought, that you liked gifts that meant something, and standing here in the greenhouse that Ben had made sure was filled with enough plants to support your dream in the backyard of the house Ben bought not only for you but for your children, made you want to melt into a puddle.
Because Ben was ensuring the two of you had a future, that your children had a future, and you didn't think that you could love him any more than you already did.
“When I took you to Vought I didn't know any better. I was comparing you to the women I used to fuck around with and what they would have wanted, what they would have thought was special." Ben's jaw tightens and you wonder if he's thinking about Countess. "But I wanted to give you that life because I thought it's what you would want and because I wanted to take care of you, but I was wrong." Ben gestures with his free hand back to the house again and then looks at you, the sunlight catching the flecks of gold in his eyes like stars. "This is what you want Petals. This life. A house on a quiet street away from it all where you can garden and read and exist in a world that isn't fucked up with supes and compound V."
You’re speechless now, tears trailing down your cheeks.
“I’ve lived in a lot of different places and I forgot what it was like to have a home and for the longest time I didn’t understand what I was missing. I had money, I had fame, I had women willing to do whatever I wanted, and I had people worshipping me, but I was missing something.” He trails his thumb over your cheek again with a soft smile. “Turns out it was you. You’re fucking annoying, you get under my skin, you make me feel like a complete asshole when I make you cry, you somehow find some little thing to complain about when I do something for you-“
“Again why do you always sound like you’re insulting me whenever you try to confess how you feel?” You laugh, but it comes out more of a sob.
“Shut up.” Ben rolls his eyes with a sigh, but there’s not bite to his words. “You always interrupt me.”
“Because you always insult me!” You rub at your eyes with the back of your hand.
“I have told you on numerous fucking occasions that I’m not good with words!”
“But-“
“Shh.” He puts his hands on your cheeks. “You're so different than anyone I've ever met. You drive me fucking crazy. Any other man would have jumped off a building by now, but-“ He shakes his head with a wide smile. “I fucking love it and I'm so fucking lucky that you decided to love me."
"You didn't give me much choice. It was you that insisted on living in my shitty apartment." You breathe, your hands moving up the soft fabric of his t-shirt to rest against his chest. "I did my best to drive you away, but you wouldn't leave. And you call me stubborn."
"Nothing you could have done would have driven me away Petals." His hand falls to where yours rests on his chest, and gently holds your wrist. "Nothing you can do will drive me away. Not now, not ever."
The love in his eyes makes your lungs stop working. He was looking at you the way you always wanted someone to, as if he could see past flesh and bone and into your soul and saw your worth, as if Ben saw every little piece of you that you tried to hide and didn't care.
"And nothing that you've done will drive me away Ben." You whisper leaning in to him. "You can't change the past."
"I know." He swallows tightening his grip on your wrist. “And I know you keep saying that you don’t want me to pay for everything because you want to be more independent, and you’re worried that we can’t afford this, but fuck even if you told me you wanted to stay in that shitty apartment building, I’d buy the whole thing and make everyone leave just to make sure that you and our kid is safe."
Determination flickers in his eyes and you believe it, because you know that Ben would do anything for you. 
"But I knew the moment I saw this house that this was what you wanted, that this life is what you've wanted. I know that you like to do things for yourself, but I didn’t buy the house because I didn't think that you couldn’t help me… it’s because I wanted to do this for you. I like doing things for you because I love you.”
"I love you too." You smile up at him a little misty eyed, but happy.
Ben's jaw tightens for a moment before he says his next words. "I'm not going to lie, I've imagined this kind of life before when I was with Countess."
You fight the wave of anger that surges with her name in your chest. You hated her for what she did to Ben and what she did to your grandmother, and wished that before Ben blew her to kingdom come, you had an hour with her to show her what it was like to get poison ivy shoved up her ass.
But it was unusual of Ben to mention her. He didn't often bring her up in conversation.
"I started imagining it after I visited Diana. I saw how happy she was with your grandfather and with your dad when he was a kid. I wanted that. But each time I tried to imagine what it was like with Countess, it never fit, something was wrong. And I know now that it's because it wasn't with you. It never looked like the life we have together and I wouldn't trade that for another second of fame."
"Ben-" You breathe his name, tears cresting over your cheeks.
"The moment I walked in the front door of this place I knew it was right. I knew this was the place that we were going to raise our children. I see us here too Petals. I see myself coming through the front door and you fucking tackling me because you can't wait long enough for me to close the door. I see us on the couch in front of the fire making love. I see you upstairs in the nursery painting the walls with paint in your hair even though I told you I was going to do it. I see you singing a fucking ABBA song while you rock our child in your arms. And I see you out here in this greenhouse doing what you love and me being happy because I know you're safe and I don't have to worry that I'm going to get home and you won't be there or worse." Ben's jaw tightens at the thought. "I want this with you for the rest of my life and I don't care if I sound like a fucking pussy for admitting that."
Ben drops down to one knee
"Wait what are you-" You begin to say, but Ben pulls a small box out of his pocket that makes you forget how to breathe entirely.
"So I’m asking you to let me give this to you and to our children, because I feel like I’m finally coming home and I don’t want to be anywhere else, just with you."
You stand there for a moment speechless, staring down at where Ben is on one knee. "Are you asking me to move in with you?" You try to smirk at your joke, remembering what Ben asked you the night he came home.
"No." Ben smiles opening the box. "I'm asking you to marry me."
You'd like to say that the ring is beautiful, but truthfully you don't look at it. As soon as the words are out of Ben's mouth you throw yourself against him so hard that he loses his balance and tumbles back onto the pavement, while catching you on top of him to make sure that no part of you hits the ground and make sure the baby is safe.
"Wha-" He begins to say, but you shut him up, your mouth falling against his so hard that you think that you hear the click of your teeth, but you can't stop.
Not when the man below you has your whole heart and had it the second you let him spend the night in your apartment all those months ago, not when he has been everything you needed for so long that the thought of him leaving would destroy you, and not when he is the only person in the world who sees all of you and asked for more.
Ben's body relaxes under yours as he deepens the kiss, drinking you in like he can't get enough, his hands coming up to hold you tighter against him, before he flips you over onto the ground as gently as he can so he's hovering over you. His dark hair is falling forward into his face, eyes bright with mischief, as he stares down at you.
"Is that a yes?" He smirks.
"It's a maybe." Your hands entwine at the back of his neck. "If you reconsider the hall pass option with Jeff Goldblum."
Ben kisses you so hard you see stars. “You’re so fucking annoying.”
"You know you love it, and I plan on annoying you for the rest of my life Gramps. You should get used to it."
"Do you promise Petals?" Ben breathes against your lips, eyes focused on yours.
"I promise. You're stuck with me."
"I can't imagine anything better sweetheart." He kisses you again, but pulls back with a unreadable expression. "Are you mad I lied?” He breathes against your lips.
“No. Because I lied too.”
“About what?” Ben looks confused.
“All of this. It isn’t what I imagined. It isn't what I thought falling in love would look like. It isn't what I expected and it's different than what I told you at that fundraiser.” Your fingers curl into the hair at the nape of his neck to hold him above you, refusing to let him go for even a second.
Ben's smirk drops into a worried frown that you kiss away, the warmth of his body around you like a warm bath.
“It’s better.” You breathe against his lips, watching the way his eyes brighten.
When he looked at you like that it made you feel like you'd swallowed the sun and it was bursting out of your fingertips. You never wanted to lose his lovelight and you wanted to spend the rest of your life being his.
The world outside the greenhouse falls away and you're left with Ben, the man you couldn't help but fall head over heels with the night you decided to take a chance.
Tumblr media
A/N: I'm not crying, it's just raining on my face 😭. This reader and this version of Soldier Boy hold such a special place in my heart. Oh goodness I didn't think that we'd ever get here, but wow😊. This fic series wasn't just me writing, it was me being filled with the constant love and support of all of y'all helping me towards the goal and I am so grateful for everyone who reblogged, commented, liked, and loved the story just as much as I did 💗. I could not have done this without y'all. I am going to write a mini-series for them and I have some fic ideas for the two of them, so it is not goodbye completely, it's just I'll see you in a little while. Seriously though, thank you so much to everyone 🥰
Taglist:
@roseblue373 @mrsjenniferwinchester @corruptedcruiser @winchesterwild78 @the-super-who-locked-wizard
@criminalyetminimal @52ndstreeet @bitchykittenconnoisseur @anna6307
@faephoria @possiblyafangirl @jqtaro @quietlybitchy @tinydancer40
@roger-that-cap @megara0224 @miskwaadesiwag @rainyeggvoidpurse
@soldiergrimes @tiffsbagels @podiumackles
@ifyouwerethemoon @ririshkin @peachhiz @fitxgrld @sukunassfinger
@xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx @ej13928 @deans-spinster-witch @kr804573 @modiddys-blog
@acciosherlockholmes @minas-fantasies @fireskyy
@n-o-p-e-never @nesnejwritings @am0rem @tpwkcalli @momggn
@fitxgrld @whimsicalcherry @ladysparkles78
@spxideyver @zepskies @impala67stellawinchester
@reidtomewinchester @samanthadegaro @glossy01 @nikimisery
@tunnelvisionlove @incandxscents @winchester-stark @samahanta
@melonmochi
@kamisobsessed @whichwitchwanda @karolina-12110905 @jcollins03-blog
@pixviee @filmologetica @yvonneeeee @c1nnamong1rl29 @kmc1989
@livya99 @cherrygirl444 @tulipsvanilla @angrydragon90 @chi-raz
122 notes · View notes
concretejunglefm · 2 days ago
Text
I'm not ready to let you forget me (part 1).
Tumblr media Tumblr media
*edit credit goes to the lovely @defuckingthrone-dot-com
You told your friends you want me dead And said that I did everythin' wrong And you're not wrong
Tumblr media
An anon request for lovers to enemies 
Summary: It’s been two years since Noah cheated on you, abruptly ending your relationship. However, the universe seems to have a peculiar sense of humor in its plan to reunite you.
Pairing: Noah Sebastian x reader.
CW: none really. Mentions of cheating, Noah can be an overall asshole and a tad bit of angst.
WC: 3.2k.
Dividers: Silent-stories.
Tumblr media
Had Noah cheated, you believe that you could've handled everything a lot better, but somehow what he did had been worse.
It wasn't cheating, even if you couldn't ignore the pit in your stomach when you thought about him and her together.
Noah's ex had joined the last leg of his tour as an opening act, and while under any other circumstances it wouldn't have bothered you, his nonchalant attitude about it did. 
This had been a man who spent time after time cursing her out to you, pushing aside any doubts or worries you had felt when it came to her, and now he didn't care if she was joining him in the most important aspect of his life.
Even worse was how he’d knocked back your own suggestion of joining him.
"It's only for a few days. I'll get to watch you play, and we can see it as a vacation." "You can see it as that. For me, it's work, babe. You know that, and you know how important it is to me." "I know I just thought." "Well, don't. Not this time. Maybe next time."
You did your best to brush off the hurt at the time, and now again as the memory resurfaces.
Noah didn't cheat, but what he did was close enough to make you feel heartbroken and forgotten about.
Messages and calls came less and less during this leg, and now you were sitting up early Saturday morning going through the posts on your Twitter feed like a fool, allowing yourself to be more hurt with each one that you came across.
@badoxmens: Did you see Noah and his ex on stage last night?
@ieatconcreeete: I hope this means they're finally getting back together !!
@artitficalsuicide: If I were his girlfriend, I would hate myself right now.
@deduckingthrone: Noah has a girlfriend? Are you sure? Him and his ex looked pretty cozy if he does.
The videos and pictures which accompanied the tweets did nothing to ease the rising bile in your throat, and every attempt to reach Noah was left unanswered.
Noah ignored every single text and call you made to him, not bothering to even make it obvious that he was ignoring you, the delivered and read notifications driving you mad until you had to stop yourself altogether.
Instead of breaking up with you, he ghosted you, your only proof of this coming a week later when another set of videos and photos showed up on your feed of him attending the album launch party of his ex.
There was no ignoring the closeness between them, the way he lingered by her in the one video, the way they were caught slipping off together and hovering a little too closely in another.
You almost went to write out a long-winded text, one full of all your feelings for everything that had transpired over the past week, but instead settled for a simple 'fuck you'. Even going as far as to block and delete his number to not allow for any temptation in reaching out to him.
You deserved better than this, that whatever had transpired for Noah to play with your feelings in this manner and you decided then that you'd do whatever it took to move on.
Tumblr media
"What you need is a girls’ trip." The suggestion from your best friend came as no surprise, Sloan would always choose a spa day or a girls’ trip whenever she felt a need to unwind, which was practically every week according to her.
"Huh?" You snap back from your own thoughts, mindlessly stirring a spoon in your latte.
"Babe, please tell me that you are not still hung up on that guy." You hear both the pity and disdain in her tone.
To Sloan boys were nothing more than toys to be played with, to be thrown down and picked back up whenever she wanted. That was her trick to not being hurt.
"It's been two years."
"I know." You don't even need to give her a real answer for her to know, but it still doesn't stop your mind from wandering and from the pang in your chest each time you think about him.
“Girls’ trip, this weekend and I'm not taking no for an answer."
Tumblr media
You wish that she had taken no for an answer.
A girl’s trip sounded delightful until she suggested Vegas and you were squeezing yourself onto a last-minute flight there. You wouldn't have minded had it not been for the fact that your seats were apart from one another and you had been given a middle seat, which meant you were now stuck in between two strangers.
Moving along the aisle towards your seat, you slide your weekend bag from your shoulder and toss it into the overhead bin. Looking down at your ticket, you confirm the seat number and tuck a piece of hair behind your ear as you tap on the shoulder of the man sitting on the end seat, covered up with a black hoodie.
"Excuse me. I'm 33B." You gesture to the empty space beside him, and the minute you catch a familiar pair of brown eyes gaze back at you, you feel your heart plummet into your stomach and bile rising up your throat.
Noah.
You're ready to make a dash towards the back of the plane, either to throw up in the bathroom or attempt to throw yourself out of the emergency exit.
"Sor—."
He cuts himself off on the sight of you, and you huff as he moves himself and allows for you to squeeze past.
When you fall into the middle seat, you find Jolly sitting on the other side of you and realize that they must be on their way to a show. 
In Vegas? 
You almost turn and ask him but decide not to. You spent the last two years ignoring his and his band's existence; you can do that for another hour on this flight.
When you dare a glance in Jolly's direction, he's already sliding his headphones on and looking out of the window, completely disengaging himself. You're almost jealous. You'd do anything to disappear from this moment's event, even exchange seats with the Swede so as not to be sat next to Noah.
As the flight pulls out to taxi, you feel Noah's leg bouncing against your own. You know it's his nerves. He's always been a nervous flyer, and it makes you wonder why he's choosing to fly instead of driving to Vegas.
You mentally smack yourself because it's not your place to wonder these things or even care about them anymore.
"Will you stop that?" You finally voice your annoyance as the plane begins its descent down the runway.
"You know I'm a nervous flyer!" He retorts, and yes, you do know, but he's not supposed to highlight that fact.
“Yeah, but it's annoying." You snipe beneath your breath.
"I can't help it!"
You sound like a couple of squabbling kids, and you hit your knee against his as if to prove a point for him to stop, but he only bounces his leg harder.
It's as if he's purposely trying to piss you off, and unfortunately for you, it's working.
"Just—" You reach over and press your hand down on his thigh, forcing his leg still. "There. Stop."
He does stop, but then you feel his larger tattooed hand atop yours, and his fingers slip beneath and around your own as if choosing to accept this as you giving him some form of comfort.
You're not, but you can hardly pull your hand away as the plane begins to take off and you feel his fingers tightening around yours, signifying his general fear and discomfort over flying.
That is until you're hit with the reminder that this guy ghosted you, and you owe him nothing.
You snatch your hand back, glaring at him as he looks down at you.
"What was that for?"
“Oh, please, you're a big boy. Hold your own damn hand if you're that scared." You don't hold back on the mockery in your tone, crossing your arms over your chest.
"I was always there for you, and this is how you repay me?"
“Oh, please, you were there for your own ego."
You feel Noah lean in closer to you and you edge yourself away as best as you can without causing too much disruption to Jolly tucked in the window seat.
"You could at least try to make this work."
You hear him whisper, and your mouth drops open due to the utter audacity this man has to even suggest such a thing.
"Why would I do that when you did such a great job proving you're not worth the effort?" You snipe back, keeping your voice low.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You're really choosing now to play dumb? God, you really are all muscle and no brains now, aren't you?"
You couldn't ignore the fact that over the past two years he had buffed out even more than you can remember.
Noah had always been physically fit during the time you were together, with muscles coming in, but there was something more toned and larger about him now. 
It was a noticeable enough sight that could have any girl drooling over him.
But not you. 
You refused to engage with the thought.
"So what you're saying is you think I look hot?"
You don't need to look at him to see it; you can hear the smirk in his voice, and it makes you shake with anger at how unfazed he appears by all of this. 
You can't resist jabbing your elbow into his side, resulting in him letting out a whine which draws the attention of passengers around you to look over.
"What was that for?" Noah grumbles, bringing a hand to his side as he rubs the spot you’d caught. 
"Because you're a dumbass." You spit out between gritted teeth.
"Excuse me, is there a problem here?" You haven't even noticed the seatbelt signs turn off, and when you look up, you spot a young air hostess peering in at you both. The moment her eyes catch sight of Noah, you spot that sudden flash of recognition in her own.
"Here we go," You mumble under your breath, rolling your own eyes as you direct your head forward and press back against the headrest. 
You wait to hear it, his charm that he always uses whenever there's a fan who recognizes him in a place he doesn't want to be noticed.
He's suave with it, and it always made you swoon in the beginning because you believed that he was merely trying to seek out his privacy for you both, but now you realize it was just one of his many tactics for keeping up some reputation he felt the need to uphold.
"Well, well... It looks like someone has good taste in music. You just made my day… but if you don't mind keeping it between us?"
You scoff and press your lips together when feeling the heat of a stare on you, but the air hostesses' quiet giggling is enough to prove that his little charm worked.
Shaking your head, you roll your eyes. "Real smooth." You remark once she leaves down the plane aisle to attend to another passenger.
"It worked on you, didn't it?"
"Don't flatter yourself. That was after five drinks, and I'd been eyeing up Folio all night."
"Oh—"
"Will you both quit it before I bang your heads together!" Jolly cuts Noah off, interrupting your squabbling.
"She started it." Noah argues, and your head turns back to him as you shoot him a glare. 
If looks could kill, you'd have done it multiple times by now.
Tumblr media
The rest of the flight wasn't any easier, between playing elbow hockey with Noah over the armrest and more snide remarks, you were thankful the moment the plane came into land, unbuckling your belt and attempting to move the moment the seatbelt sign turned off.
"The plane hasn't even come to a stop." Noah points out as you attempt to stand, ushering him to move out of your way.
"I don't care, just move." You huff and glare down at him as he remains still, his tattooed hands sitting and tapping on his thighs, barely giving you a brief glance.
"Not even a please? You're so rude."
You know that you shouldn’t, but you begin to attempt climbing over him, holding onto the seat in front as you try to drag yourself past him and over his lap, muttering as you go. "And you are absolutely incorrigible."
"Wow, that's a new one. Is it your word of the day?"
You glance behind him and see him attempting to push back into his seat more, as if that's helping you in any way, and when you see his hand raise, you instinctively swat at it with the assumption he's going to touch you. 
"Ow?! There was no need for that."
Finally free from your row, you huff and pull yourself together, reaching for the overhead bin and pulling out your bag. 
“Well, this was fun. I really hope we never have to do it again." You glare at him and begin making your way down the aisle with the rest of the passengers towards the exit door.
Tumblr media
You've never been happier to see the back of a plane in your life, moving as fast as your legs will let you through the crowd of people, almost missing the sound of Sloan's voice as she calls after you.
"Wait up, speedy!" She laughs as she finally catches up, and you come to a slow down, shaking your head free of all the thoughts which had been swirling around in there due to the unexpected reunion you just briefly had with your ex.
"Sorry. I just had to get out of there."
"That wasn't who I think it was, was it?" You spare a glance over at Sloan, and your irritated expression gives that answer away. "It was? What was he doing on a plane to Vegas?"
"I can't say I really cared to ask him, Sloan." Your tone has a bite still left over from the sniping that you and Noah had done. "Sorry, he just really gets under my skin."
"I can see that."
"The sooner we're at the hotel, the better. Then I can wash this whole thing off me, and we can finally start enjoying our girls' weekend."
"Yes! Girls’ weekend. No talk about stupid boys." Sloan slips her arm around yours, linking you together as she lets out an excited 'woohoo'. It makes you laugh, and you finally feel the tension that being sat next to Noah for the last hour had caused, slipping away.
It's a feeling which is short-lived, however.
After making your way through the airport and standard checks, you reach the taxi rank outside, and as you open the door, you turn back to call for Sloan, only to be met with the 6'3 asshole who's covered in tattoos.
“Oh, thanks, you shouldn't have." He flashes you a grin as he slides into your taxi, followed by Jolly, who offers you a brief apologetic look. Maybe you should've been giving him a harder time if he was enabling this stupid behavior.
You stand speechless as they pull the door close, tossing daggers at the cab as it drives away and a scream rumbles in your throat. 
"Where's the taxi?" Sloan asks as she chooses now to join you. You grumble something incoherent under your breath as you turn to wave down the next incoming taxi.
She's now joining Noah and Jolly on your shit list.
Tumblr media
"It's going to be perfect! There's a spa, three pool areas. One of them is an infinity pool off the balcony upstairs." Sloan continues to drone on about the hotel and everything it includes. You only have a weekend here, but she's already planning multiple ways for you to take advantage of everything.
Currently, your mind is back on Noah and his stupid, smug ass face as he stole your taxi. You try to distract yourself from it, shaking him from your thoughts and coming back into the present, to this weekend.
Seeing him was a blip, but you refused to allow him to derail your plans or excitement.
Counting the room numbers down the hallway, you look up as you come closer to yours, room number: 308. 
Sloan has the room opposite you, disappearing inside after making plans to knock on after shower and changing. A shower sounds perfect right about now, not only to wash off the plane smell but also with being in such proximity to Noah in general.
As you fiddle with the room key, you hear a familiar voice, which causes your back to raise. Turning your head, you peer down the hallway, watching a group of familiar faces grow nearer to you. Noah is the one trailing behind, while Folio and Matt's voices are the ones you hear echoing down the hall.
You hastily attempt to open your hotel room door, being met with the red light before trying again.
You huff and close your eyes to calm yourself from growing irrationally angry.
Hearing the voices past you, you open your eyes and look back to find Noah standing at the door next to yours, room number: 310.
"Hey, neighbor." Noah flashes you a grin, and you shake your head in protest.
"No."
"No?" He repeats back at you in a question, his brows knitting together. "What do you mean no?"
"I mean no, we are not neighbors, and you cannot be here. Not in this room, not in this hotel. Hell, not even in this state." You're being irrational, but you never did quite have much rationality when it came to him. You always found yourself diving in headfirst to whatever thought crossed your mind.
"And who said this? You?" Noah raises a brow at you, taking a step closer as he leans a hand against the wall.
He easily towers over you, and under any other circumstance before now, that would have you weak at the knees and buckling for him, but right now it has you infuriated that he's somehow here, ruining your weekend and attempting to charm you.
"Yes."
"Still as bossy as ever, I see."
"And you're still an asshole." You snipe back, your eyes narrowing, still attempting to get your keycard in your door and slip away from this conversation.
"Ouch, that hurt." Noah raises his free hand, bringing it to his chest, feigning a tone of disbelief and hurt while you roll your eyes in response.
“Oh, please, that would insinuate you had any feelings to begin with."
"I have a lot of feelings, actually. Such as feeling sorry for you while watching you struggle with something so easy. Here, let me."
Before you have a chance to protest, he's reaching out to take your hotel room key and slips it into the swipe, drawing it out to a flashing green light.
You huff as you open the door, pushing forward, and the last thing you hear before the door slams is another final snarky remark from him; "Not even a thank you?"
Once in the safety of your room, you let out a loud scream of frustration, only to hear Noah's chuckle from the other side of the door, and you gently bang the back of your head against the door as you lean back on it.
Great, now you really can't escape him this weekend.
111 notes · View notes
entitled-fangirl · 18 hours ago
Text
Cowboy!Cregan 6
Summary: Cregan teaches her to ride a horse. Or... not.
Masterlist
1, 2, 3, 4, 5
.......................................
"What do ya think?" He whispered in her ear. She could practically feel his smirk against her skin.
She clung to the saddle like a lifeline. She knew he only put her in front of him for his own enjoyment. 
One of his hands rested on her thigh, squeezing occasionally as a comfort. 
"It's… unusual."
"You're doin' well," he praised. "Few could ride a horse like this."
"You're quite literally holding me on the saddle, Cregan," she pointed out.
He shoved the reigns into her hands and held his hands up in a surrender. "Am I?"
"Cregan," she warned lowly.
She heard his chuckle and his heels pushed into the horse's ribs. The horse spurred on, moving into a gallop. 
She gripped the reigns so tightly that her knuckles turned white. Cregan's hearty laugh only grew but he let his hands move down her arms. 
It only lasted a moment because he grabbed her hands and tugged on the reigns, pulling the horse to a stop. 
The horse snorted as he did so, and she felt like she could finally take a breath. "Don't do that ever again."
"City girl," he teased her. "What am I gonna do with you?"
"Care for me. Love me." She teasingly laid back against his chest. "Take me home and have your way with me."
"Oh yeah?" 
A shrug, as if she didn't know what she said was causing a heat to run down his body. "If you wanted."
"If I wanted…" he repeated softly to himself. "And what if I wanted something else?"
She craned her neck to look at him. "Like what?" She asked in a deadpan.
"You're the prettiest girl I've ever met-"
"-Cregan."
His nose tucked into her hair. "And awfully smart-"
"-Cregan," she warned again.
"And I love you a lot, you know? You know that don't you?"
"Whatever you're doing, don't."
"Gotta tell me you know that," he ordered.
"I do, I do, but what-"
"-Then I'll know you'll have it in your heart to forgive me if I just…" He kissed her head and swung a leg over- abandoning her on the horse.
She watched in horror as he landed on the ground, his boots kicking dust up.
"See you at home," he grinned.
"Cregan. Cregan?" She asked worriedly. "I don't know how to-"
"-See you at home!" He called over his shoulder. He had begun to walk back towards the vague direction of the house.
"Cregan!"
"Be gentle with her."
She was growing worried. The horse snorted, cold and ready to go on a run. "I-I will," she eased.
"Wasn't talking to you." The cowboy rolled his shoulders back, stretching as he walked across the long field.
The house was at least a mile off.
So there she was- horse and rider. In the middle of a field. And she had no idea what to do.
She opened the door in anger. In her attempt to dismount in the stable, she'd stepped right in shit. 
But there was a warmth in the house that she couldn't ignore. And a smell.
Cregan emerged from the kitchen in a 'kiss the cook' apron the ranch hands had bought him as a joke. He didn't joke about it. He loved that thing. He eyed her up and down. "Came back better than I thought you would."
"That's all you have to say, Stark?"
He shrugged, disappearing back into the kitchen. "Go change and wash up. Dinner's in 15."
She sighed, pulling her boots off and leaving at the door. 
Once in their room, she noticed the outfit laid across the bed: Her favorite pjs, and Cregan's favorite bra and underwear she wore She rolled her eyes playfully. He was impossible, trying to charm her with dinner and still asking her to wear what he wanted.
She'd always do it.
A quick brush through her hair, followed by washing her face and running a cloth over the dirt on her arms, she dressed in time for dinner.
"Look at you, pretty girl," he mused when she walked in. "C'mere." Once in his arms, he laid a heavy kiss to her lips, just waiting for her rant. "Go sit down and I'll serve ya."
"I hate you."
She didn't mean it. They both knew that. He kissed her head. "I know. Go sit down."
After a few minutes, Cregan appeared- completely shirtless. He had a nice pair of Wranglers on and his favorite boots, hair tied up in her favorite way. He looked good.
A little too good.
"This isn't gonna win me over." She was determined to be strong.
"Really?" He questioned. He laid her plate in front of her.
"Really."
He bent down, leaning completely over and towering over her. His hand held the back of the chair, encasing her in. His face was inches from hers. "Really?" He asked again, this time in a huskier tone.
"R-really," she swallowed.
He took his time as his eyes flickered down to her lips and back to her eyes. "Shame," he grinned. God, his smile was stunning.
"You left me on a horse in the middle of bumfuck nowhere-"
He shot back up, completely amusement in his eyes as he defended himself. "A mile from the house, baby. A mile."
"And," she continued. "You laughed at it."
He began to giggle again, placing a hand over his chest when she glared. "Sorry, baby. It's just," the sentence was broken with another giggle. "You were so cute on that ole boy. I knew you'd figure it out." He turned the conversation around. "You said you wanted to learn to ride, right?"
"And leaving me to get bucked off is the way to teach? Some fucking teacher."
He brushed her jaw with his fingers. "He hasn't bucked a day in his life. He's the calmest horse I've ever owned."
She faked a deep sigh, like maybe she was holding in her anger. But in reality, she was a bit touched that he'd really cared that much. She shouldn't be. He's a thoughtful man in general. But she'd spent an hour out in the field, thinking he'd just left her without a care.
He retreated back to the kitchen, re-emerging with his own plate and a shirt on. 
As he sat down, she grinned. "What happened to dinner and a show?"
Cregan shrugged. "You didn't want a show."
"Oh, I assure you I do."
"Eat."
She scoffed, pointing her fork in his direction. "You're just rude, Farmer Stark."
She knew he hated when she called him that. The first time, it'd caused a thirty minute rant on how "there's a difference between a farmer and a rancher, baby."
He threw her a playful glare. "Well, that's no way to get the show rescheduled."
She deadpanned. "Stark, you know what I'm wearing underneath this. You'll put back on that show after dinner or there'll be riots in the streets."
"What streets?"
"The ones leading up to the bedroom. Now, take off your shirt and eat this wonderful dinner."
He pretended to be annoyed. He wasn't. In the slightest. He was quite turned on. 
He sighed, pulling his shirt off and beginning to eat. He muttered a soft, "Hope I get dessert for this."
"Could always take a different approach to this horse riding thing," she wondered aloud. "Save a horse and all..."
He choked on his food.
..................................................
58 notes · View notes
obsessedhoneycomb · 20 hours ago
Text
Family
Tumblr media
George Russell x fem!reader
Summary: While you thought you're about to spend your perfect anniversary night with your boyfriend, life reminds you otherwise.
Warnings: sadness, depressive thoughts, infertility, pregnancy, endometriosis
Word count: 1k
A/N: What can I even say.. I've been at the doctor's today, for check up after my surgery, which was a year ago and I got confirmed that my endometriosis is growing back. Not that I wouldn't know, because I know my body, but being said the facts out loud is hard. I spent my afternoon crying, curled on the couch, questioning myself in case of being able to have a child one day. To get myself out of the misery, I wrote this, because I would like to have someone to come home to me and hold me in his arms, just giving me the support through all this shit. I already wrote a few pieces endometriosis related, so if you want, check it out too. Love you all. <3
---
It was meant to be a perfect day, you had plans to cook some dinner and also had some spicy things in your mind for the night.
Getting through your doctors appointments was something you got used to in the last year, after you had a surgery for your endometriosis. You felt something was off for a few months, your cramps crawling, stabbing you in the back again, those flares being harsh to the point you couldn't even sit. But you held your optimism, trying not to scare George, because worrying him while he was at his prime perfomance during the season wasn't on the list.
Today was meant to be special because you had a two years anniversary.
"Can you see these lesions here? It's back again, I'm sorry."
The words you somehow expected, but didn’t want to hear. The same spiral of pain, hormone shots, nausea and... infertility.
Yeah, you discussed it with George, because everything seems so easy to talk about with him, the idea of having kids.
It gutted you deeply, that you might not be able to give him a child.
As you got home, the space was quiet, only the soft humming of aircondition was heard, making your heart clench, that he's not even there to embrace your mess, even though it's not his fault. George was meant to be home in the evening, but you had a message in your voicemail, that he can’t get home in time, because of the delayed flight. Okay, he'll be here in the morning.
But your sadness and depresive thoughts will be with you through the night. Torturing your mind, getting the best of you, making you feel worthless and weak.
---
"Baby...?"
The faint sound of the deep voice woke you from the nap. You cried yourself to sleep in the living room, still wearing your clothes you went to the doctors in. The coat scattered on the ground next to the couch, your shoes kicked in the hallway, tissues to which you drowned your tears everywhere around you.
George knew something happened, it tugged at his heartstrings, when he saw you like this. Sad, messy and depressed.
You groaned a little, disoriented, while he sat beside you, his gaze locked on your face.
"What happened?"
Softly, he took your hand into his, brushing over your knuckles, the warmth of his skin seeping into yours.
Then it hit you again. "It's back again, I'm sorry."
Tears burning in your eyes, you avert them to the side, not able to look into his beautiful ocean blue eyes.
"Hey, love... Don't do this. I know, that something is wrong, but don't try to avoid me, I'm here for you, remember?"
The flicker of hope, that you’re not that worthless went through your mind, your gaze finally locking on his, pouring all your hurt into the pool of his positivity.
"I was at the doctor's today."
Oh no. There's was only one thing that was able to get this reaction out of you.
"How bad is it?"
His hand wander slowly to your cheek, brushing a thumb over it.
"It's not worse than last time, but still... It's there. Again. For fucks sake, again. I hate it so much. I hate myself."
The breaking point, your emotions flew out, your voice cracking and your tears staining your cheeks, your eyes red even more than before.
George pulled you closer to him, letting you lean against him, as you buried your face in the crook of his neck. The scent of him mixed with his cologne was enough to calm you down a little bit. He was your safe haven.
"Shhh... It's okay, just- just let it out. Be angry, scream and cry. Don't hold it in your mind. I'm here to hold you, to pick up your shattered pieces." his voice was soothing lullaby, when your cries got louder and more desperate. Brushing his fingers through your hair, he pressed the kiss on your temple, rocking you as his arms were wrapped around you tightly.
"I might not be able to have a child, George." you choked out between your sobs, and he looked down at your face with frown.
"Is that the thing that concern you the most?"
"Obviously. What a woman I am, to not give her man a child."
George felt partly offended by your words, but he kept his composure, because he was used to your hateful comments towards yourself, even, for the most of the time, you were a hell of a confident woman, loving yourself.
"Don't talk like this, please. You're much more than a baby machine." he tried to be funny and.. it worked. You smiled through your tears. He reached for your cheek, wiping off your emotions, smiling a little.
"You can't lose hope just like that. We can be lucky, you know. We just have to try, be patient and somewhere along the way, we're gonna be blessed. I don't care if it's gonna be in a month or in years. I'll be there for you along the way. As I always am. And even though we don't get lucky, I'm lucky to have you. And that's all that matters in my life, because you're my family."
And as ever, he managed to give you peace, calming warmth flooded your soul, making you sure in that George is the one.
---
Watching the screen of the ultrasound machine as you laid down on the examination table at your doctor’s, you couldn’t shake the excitement. George, holding your hand, standing beside you, was watching your expression, his chest fluttering at how happy you were.
"Ah, seems like you got very lucky." The doctor chuckled, pointing to the screen, showing two strong fetuses.
"What does it mean?" George asked first, clearly confused.
"That means that you're gonna have twins."
You nearly passed out while you gasped loudly.
"What?! Two of them?"
George only chuckled, kissing your forehead, nuzzling his nose to your hair, inhaling the scent of your shampoo.
"Guess we were pretty thorough with our trying." he whispered with teasing tone in his voice.
73 notes · View notes
thelonelyshore-if · 17 hours ago
Note
It occurred to me that Croft is going to hate that a decent amount of MCs are obsessed with the lake especially if romanced by them. Croft gives the vibe of not only wanting to leave but to put as many miles between them and the fog as possible.
Which would probably be pretty hard to achieve if even after they both escape MC comes to the lake every summer to visit (they still feel v bad about not visiting more in the past).
Poor Croft would probably pull their own hair out, if they hadn’t worked painstakingly on their aesthetic, about the fact they have seemingly fallen for the most insane person alive.
(Not MC going to visit the lake every summer, laying on the dock and looking into the depths while they keep their feet and tell the lake all the things they love about Croft before going for a swim, like gushing to a parent or best friend about your s/o. Softly lamenting that they couldn’t convince Croft to come this time either, but that they wouldn’t stop working on it).
You're 100% correct, Croft would hate it. I love this ask so much. Your thoughts are soooo good. It got me thinking, and I ended up possessed, so I wrote a little drabble to go along with it c:
“You're sure you don't want to come with?”
Croft stands in the entryway of your shared home. You've got the door cracked, letting an unpleasant wave of hot air worm its way into the house. Sunshine cascades over your shoulders. It spills onto the floor, golden-bright and much too warm.
Croft edges away from the light and the heat. The heft of their thick black hoodie is enough to get them sweating at the mere thought of stepping out into the summer day.
“Yes, I'm sure,” they say tersely, avoiding your eyes. 
The skin on the back of their neck pricks. Gooseflesh raises on their arms. It must be 80 degrees out and yet they feel cold. 
Why do you insist on doing this?
They think the words, but it's an old argument, and they refuse to sour your departure with a recycled spat.
Instead, they tilt their head and ask, “Will your parents be joining you this year?”
What they mean is, will you be alone? Or, worse, alone with Willow? They're asking if you'll be safe and sound and stay on this side of reality or if they'll spend the next week sick with the fear that the lake or your terrible little sibling will steal you away. 
If you hear the undercurrent of fear you brush past it. Instead you elect to set your luggage down and slip back into the house. You walk up and wrap your arms around their waist. 
“I'll be perfectly safe,” you respond, without answering the question. 
Croft starts to argue but falls silent when you press your lips to theirs. They hold you tighter, cupping the back of your neck. Deepening the kiss. They pour their fear and their uncertainty and their love into it, aching for you to taste the desperation on their tongue.
They can't lose you. 
They don't understand why you go back every year. They know, of course, about your youth and the lake and the red string tying you together. They've seen it, and they know you. But they still can't understand.
You escaped–both of you, together, breaking your way back into reality. Shedding the horror and the fog and the fear of Easthaven was like tasting sunshine, made all the better by you at their side. 
And yet you go back to your cabin every year. Drawn in, the moth to the flame. So far you've always ended your pilgrimage and returned to their arms. It doesn't change the silent fear that corrodes their faith and their trust; the terror that tells them that this time you'll give way to temptation. That you'll be lost to them forever. 
Except you wouldn't be, would you? Because Croft would go back, if it meant holding you again. Orpheus singing his way into hell. 
“I know you will,” they whisper against your lips. They try to rid themself of the doubt. They do trust you. They love you. 
One week and you'll be back again. 
“Don't miss me too much,” you tease, pulling away. 
“Don't fall in,” Croft responds, throat so dry that you can both hear the plea badly hidden amidst the joke. 
You give them a small, sad smile. A final hug, too brief, but you have a plane to catch and a car waiting outside. 
“I'll see you in a week,” you promise, “I love you.”
“I know.”
They watch you leave. The door creaks to a close as you pull it shut behind you. You're off to commune with something they will never understand. Leaving them behind. 
But only for a week. 
Croft closes their eyes. Takes a deep breath. 
They can handle a week.
41 notes · View notes
hwaslayer · 9 hours ago
Text
wildfire (cs) | 11.5
Tumblr media
—spotify playlist | series masterlist
—summary: assistant professor in bioengineering, incredibly attractive, lonely and divorced; that’s how most people describe san. but despite the events that have happened in his life, san has a lot going for himself. he’s a successful, sought out professor due to his brilliant contributions to science at just an early age of 32. he worked hard to get where he was now; head deep into his research, his publications, building his lab and creating a name for himself. everything was good and smooth sailing— until it wasn’t. because when he meets you, a bioengineering grad student interested in rotating in his lab, he finds himself ready to risk all the blood, sweat and tears he put in throughout the years just to keep you close— his need for you spiraling out of control like a wildfire.
—pairing: asst. professor!choi san x grad student!f. reader
—genre: (18+ - minors dni) strangers to lovers, grad school au | fluff, angst, smut
—word count: 0.8k
—chapter content/warnings: not much!! something a lil more tame lol, prob one of the 0.5s that takes place right after the chapter beforehand, i promise there is no ill intention behind what's happening here - they're both equally torn about everything as san's good friends/colleagues
Tumblr media
namjoon: you got a minute to meet up today? sorry for the last minute request but it's kinda urgent.
jongho: sure. i'm wrapping up. can meet you in the next 15 mins?
namjoon: i'll come to you.
jongho: alright then, boss.
Jongho continues typing away at his desk, responding to all the emails that came in today while he was off doing interviews for the new open faculty role in the electrical engineering department. He makes a mental note to submit his review sheet for the first round of interviewees and to review the applications for the next round tomorrow. He doesn't realize how quick 15 minutes flies by until Namjoon is swinging his door open mid-email. He continues to type away, but his eyes shift to Namjoon's figure as he fixes his blazer and takes a seat with a loud sigh.
"Long day?" Jongho cracks a small smile, typing up the last few details before sending it off and shifting his attention to Namjoon in front of him.
"Kinda." He nods towards his computer. "Sorry, didn't mean to interrupt or delay you from leaving."
"All good. Didn't really have plans, anyway. What's up? You seem a little flustered."
"Well, catching Yunho, Iseul and San arguing in a conference room wasn't exactly on my agenda for today."
"What?" Jongho cocks his head back a bit in disbelief, brows tightly knitted together as he tries to make sense of what he just heard. San had been giving him a bit of the story here and there and knowing Iseul, he wasn't exactly surprised this is how things were playing out.
He's just not sure why Iseul thinks it's her business to air this all out.
"You tell me."
"As much as I would love to help, I honestly have no idea what's going on.”
"Jongho."
"What? You know how Iseul is. She somehow still thinks she has a grip on San even after they've divorced and gone through all of that. Can't stand her, if you ask me."
"You don't have to tell me twice. But, why? Why is this a thing right now?"
"Beats me." Jongho tries to brush it off even though he can see the look on Namjoon's face, his eyes trying to study him like a damn book. He hates being in the middle because as much as he loves and supports his bestfriend, he also has the utmost respect for Namjoon and knows the guy will always be on their side regardless.
"That's the first in a very long time that I've seen San react that way at the happy hour event."
"Okay, to be fair, the guy was getting super disrespectful. I think any of us would've reacted in one way or another."
"Right, I agree. But, I know there's a story behind it. I know his anger was fueled by something else." Jongho sees the way Namjoon is going about this. He's prying for the answers he already knows, but he needs the confirmation and Jongho can give him that. 
It's just a matter of when.
"What if it was just a bad day?"
"Okay, you know what?" Joon leans onto the arm rest of the chair and gives him a look. "I'm just gonna go headfirst with it." Jongho cocks a brow up. "Is there something going on with San and his rotation student? Y/N specifically." He sighs.
"I figured."
"No, you knew." Namjoon chuckles a bit.
"I don't know. I really can't tell you because I don't know anything." Jongho says he knows nothing when he knows everything.
"Jongho." Joon repeats.
"Joon, swear." He says, even though he tries to sit as still as possible. Good thing Namjoon can't read his mind right now.
It started gradually before it took off completely. Jongho knows about the last minute meetings San has had to take, Jongho has seen the subtle glances, the subtle actions, the mood changes when you're around. Jongho remembers seeing you slip out of his hotel room very early that morning during the NAS conference. Jongho remembers seeing the polaroid slightly tip out of the wallet case mid-breakfast and seeing a tiny slip of your face in his peripherals. San quickly adjusted the polaroid and continued on like nothing, wishing for the best with that one.
And he doesn't have to be told to know you've been over multiple times. All the calls that have gone curt and short, the distraction easily laced in San's voice on the other line. He remembers the faint trace of your perfume in his home, the little post-it notes you've left on San's office desk.
Good thing Namjoon can't read his mind right now.
Cause, yes.
"I can hear your thoughts."
Well, shit.
"I don't know what to say."
"I need you to tell me yes or no, that's all. I need to make sure I'm going about this correctly even though I heard a lot today alone." Jongho sighs and sees how torn Namjoon is. They both are. They obviously want what's best for San, and they both want him to be happy. He is deserving of good, genuine love. He is deserving of genuine happiness because he always rides for the people he loves, goes the extra mile for them. He acknowledges and learns from his mistakes, he apologizes when he knows he's at fault.
He's deserving of all good.
So, they both hate that it has to come to this because it's not even you that's the problem. It's the situation, and they both don't know how to approach it with enough sensitivity and care.
Even though it's good to San, it doesn't necessarily mean it could be good for San.
"Yes."
Tumblr media
—taglist: @asjkdk @interweab @woojirang @svintsandghosts @cheolliehugs @persphonesorchid @mxnsxngie @jycas @cowboydk @vcutparis @chngbnwf @struggling101 @sanhwalvr @angelqueendom @barbielibra @brown88 @choisansplushie @yunhoswrldddd @hyukssunflower @vickykazuya @lucid-galaxys-world @jaytheatiny @pommelex @thechaotictheoryy @vixensss @santineez @nopension @domfikeluva @in-somnias-world @my-atiny-kookie-rkive @mountiiny @naoristerling @onmymymyway @thecutiepieme @wyrated
46 notes · View notes
kitkatopinions · 3 days ago
Text
The thing about RWBY volume 10 is... I don't even want it anymore.
Like, when it was first announced that Rooster Teeth was shutting down, I admit that although I was very happy that the company could no longer abuse its employees, I was still kind of disappointed that we might not get more RWBY. Yes, I kind of hate RWBY (I hate and love it,) but I personally never was out to 'destroy the show' or something, and I legit wanted to see where they were going with it and to see what I could get from it.
But it's been a while since then, and I feel like every time I even get a hint that RWBY might be coming back for season 10, my reaction is:
Tumblr media
Because the thing is, I know - I just know - that whatever they decide to do is going to be bad and near incomprehensible. But even if they somehow sort of manage to make the next volume somewhat good... There's literally no way to salvage the show without an entire reboot with all new writers, and I truly believe that at this point. I watched all of volumes 1-5 for the first time practically in one setting, and boy the whole thing had some rough parts, but I thought they had a chance to come back stronger and try to fix things, and then every season since, I've thought the same and have come up with tons of things they could do and all the good directions they could take characters and events. But it's been nine seasons, and season nine was the worst written season yet and really just gave the writers a whole host of new problems they have to address and new corners they've backed themselves into and at a certain point and after V9, there's just no fixing it because after nine seasons, it would feel weird to backtrack and there's nothing they could do going forward that would fix this bad show.
To bring up a minor example, if they made a new season where they acknowledged that Blake and Ruby have barely talked since the first season, it would retroactively make the 'you inspire me' 'meaningful moment' in volume eight feel really weird, and it would be really weird that they were only starting to be friends in the tenth volume after more than a decade. But if the writers continue to write the occasional 'meaningful moment' between Blake and Ruby without actually trying to establish a friendship and bond between them, it'll continue to feel forced and unearned, and if they're written to just ignore each other completely instead, it'll continue to feel like they don't even really know each other and aren't at all friends, and therefore the show constantly being like 'Ruby's friends love her, they have the power of friendship, I'll defeat you with the power of friendship and this gun I found' will ring hollow when what's being marketed as a team of four feels like two people dating and then also two other people who walk near them that are friends with each other.
They're literally in lose-lose conditions of their own making.
And last season, I remember repeatedly saying that there were some good concepts and moments here and there, but by the last episode, anything that had been good had pretty much been ruined. Neo? Ruined. Ruby's season 9 journey? Ruined. The Curious Cat as a concept? Ruined. All the theories I had about how the Ever After could have tied back into the plot somehow? Completely untrue. The lessons I thought there was the slightest chance of the characters coming away with? Wiped out entirely. The somewhat interesting ramifications we could get from what had happened to Jaune? Removed. The possibility of changes to character design even? It came to nothing. I have no faith that the new season will be able to fix things especially because the writers don't seem to want to fix anything, or even pay that much attention to what they're writing, so even minor good things can easily stop mattering or turn terrible just like with the entirety of volume nine. I was full on invested in Ruby's journey, only for it to be essentially brushed aside with no real consequences and seemingly no impact for the characters.
If there's a new season of RWBY that eventually comes along - a very big if - I'll probably still watch it. But honestly at this point, I hope they just leave it unfinished or reboot completely. Because I'm sure that everything I'm coming up with as a 'where from here' concept that isn't even good because I don't think a good story can be salvaged after V9... Whatever I do come up with is going to be better than what we'd actually get, and I'm actually sure that's true most of us and even megastans.
I feel like I would rather have an unfinished badly made work that I can imagine might have at least some semblance of a halfway satisfying conclusion then wind up following this project to the end on a hope and a prayer despite knowing I'd wind up even more frustrated and disappointed, because at this point I know I'm just gonna be disappointed. I literally feel like the best thing the current writers attached to RWBY could do is let the RWBY fans imagine up their own ends.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
31 notes · View notes
bettys-redwinesupernova · 14 hours ago
Text
MY MASTERPIECE
drew starkey x plus sized!fem!reader
Tumblr media
(mood board does NOT depict readers’ appearance !!)
SUMMARY: after drew catches his girlfriend crying about the hate she’s receiving, he decides to show her exactly how much he loves her.
based on this ask !! i really hope you like it anon, and i had such a lovely time writing this :’) i just KNOW drew would worship a plus!sized baddie, so imo this is canon🤫
WARNINGS: slight angst to fluff then to smut (18+ mdni pls!!), body worshipping, oral (fem rec), fingering, orgasm denial, blasphemy (“oh god”), insecurities, social media hate, crying, cursing, fat-shaming (fuck you if you do this, and you’re not welcome on my page !!) i think this is all? (lmk if i missed anything !!)
WORD COUNT: 2.4k
THIRD PERSON +
The dim light of the bedside lamp bathed the room in a soft glow. Y/N sat cross-legged on the bed, her laptop resting in front of her, illuminating her face in harsh contrast. Her throat felt tight as her eyes scanned the comments section on yet another gossip website.
"Why is he with her?"
"She's way out of his league."
"Drew could do so much better. She's not even that pretty."
"She doesn’t look right next to Drew AT ALL."
The words blurred as tears pooled in her eyes, one spilling over and sliding down her cheek. She sniffled, trying to hold it together, but it was a losing battle. Her hands trembled as she closed the laptop and set it aside, curling up into herself. The voices in her head, fueled by the hateful comments, were deafening.
She knew Drew loved her. He told her all the time, in the little ways and the big ones. But sometimes, the weight of the world's opinions was too much to bear. Tonight was one of those nights.
She was so caught up in her spiraling thoughts that she didn't hear the front door open or the sound of Drew's voice calling out.
"Babe? I'm home!" he said, his voice warm and familiar as it carried through the apartment.
Her stomach dropped. She quickly wiped at her cheeks, trying to compose herself. The last thing she wanted was for him to see her like this.
Drew stepped into the bedroom, his tall frame filling the doorway. He smiled softly, holding up a bag. "I brought takeout from your favorite place. I figured—" He stopped mid-sentence when he noticed her blotchy, tear-stained face and glossy eyes. His brow furrowed with concern as he dropped the bag on the dresser and closed the distance between them in two long strides.
"Angel, what's wrong?" he asked, sitting on the edge of the bed and cupping her face in his hands. His thumbs gently wiped away the tears that continued to fall despite her efforts to stop them. "Talk to me, baby."
She shook her head, her voice barely above a whisper. "It's nothing, Drew. I'm fine."
He frowned, not buying it for a second. "That's not nothing. Come on, tell me what's going on."
Her chest tightened as she met his worried gaze. She debated brushing it off, but the dam broke, and the words tumbled out before she could stop them. "It's just... all the comments, Drew. All the things people say about me. About us. They hate me because I'm not what they think you deserve."
Drew's eyes softened, and he pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly. She buried her face in his chest, her tears soaking into his shirt.
"They're so cruel," she continued, her voice muffled against him. "And the worst part is... I start to believe them. Maybe they're right. Maybe I'm not good enough for you."
Drew pulled back slightly, just enough to tilt her chin up so she was looking at him. His cobalt eyes were intense, his expression a mix of heartbreak and determination.
"Stop," he said firmly, his voice low and steady. "Don't you dare let those people make you feel like you're not good enough. They don't know you. They don't know us."
She shook her head, the tears still falling. "But Drew, look at me. I'm not some slim, perfect model. I don't fit the image of the kind of woman people expect you to be with."
Drew let out a frustrated sigh, running a hand through his hair before turning back to her. "Y/N, do you know what I see when I look at you?"
She stayed silent, unsure how to respond.
"I see the woman who makes me laugh harder than anyone else ever has," he said, his voice soft but unwavering. "I see the woman who listens to me when I'm struggling, who supports me no matter what. I see the woman whose smile lights up my entire day."
His hands moved to her shoulders, his thumbs brushing against her skin in soothing circles. "I don't care what anyone else thinks. I love you for you. For your kindness, your intelligence, your strength. For the way you hum when you're cooking, even though you always say you can't sing. For the way you light up when you talk about the things you're passionate about. You're the most beautiful person I've ever known, inside and out."
Her breath hitched as she listened to his words, the sincerity in his voice breaking through the walls she'd built around herself.
"You're more than enough for me, Y/N," Drew continued, his voice thick with emotion. "You're everything I've ever wanted. And if people can't see that, then screw them. They don't matter."
She let out a shaky laugh, her tears finally starting to slow. "You really mean that?"
He leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead. "With all my heart."
She looked up at him, her own heart swelling with love and gratitude. "I don't deserve you, you know that?"
He smirked, his hands sliding down to her waist. "I think it's the other way around."
The tension in the room shifted as his fingers traced slow, deliberate patterns on her sides. His gaze darkened slightly, a spark of something more than affection flickering in his eyes.
"I need you to understand how much you mean to me," he murmured, his voice dropping to a low, husky tone. "Let me show you."
Her breath caught as he leaned in, his lips brushing against hers in a tender, lingering kiss. It was a kiss that spoke of love and devotion, of promises made and kept.
He deepened the kiss, his hands moving to cradle her face as if she were the most precious thing in the world. She melted into him, her own hands finding their way to his chest, feeling the steady thrum of his heartbeat beneath her palms.
When they finally pulled apart, both slightly breathless, Drew rested his forehead against hers.
"Do you believe me now?" he asked, a small smile playing on his lips. "Or maybe I really need to show you."
Drew's hand lingered on Y/N's cheek, his thumb gently brushing away the last of her tears. His eyes never left hers—dark, intense, full of something unspoken but heavy, like the weight of a confession he couldn't hold back any longer.
"You're so fucking beautiful," he murmured, his voice low and rough, the kind of tone that made her stomach tighten and her breath hitch. She blinked up at him, her lips parting slightly as if to argue, but he didn't let her. Instead, he leaned in, pressing his forehead against hers, his breath warm against her skin. "Don't say it. Don't say you don't see it. I'll show you."
His fingers trailed down her neck, feather-light, sending shivers rippling through her body. He shifted closer, his other hand finding her waist, pulling her into him until there was no space left between them. Her heart pounded as his gaze dropped to her lips, then lower, tracing the curve of her jaw, the dip of her collarbone, the swell of her chest. Everywhere he looked, she felt it—like fire licking at her skin.
"Drew..." Her voice trembled, barely above a whisper, but he silenced her with a kiss. Soft at first, almost questioning, as if he was giving her the chance to pull away. But when she didn't, when she kissed him back, something in him snapped. His hands moved with purpose, one cupping the back of her neck while the other slid down to grip her hip, holding her firmly against him.
He deepened the kiss, slow and deliberate, his tongue sliding against hers in a way that made her knees weak. She could feel the heat building between them, the way his body pressed into hers, hard and impatient. When he finally pulled away, she was breathless, her chest rising and falling rapidly as she tried to steady herself.
But Drew wasn't done.
His lips found her jaw next, trailing hot, open-mouthed kisses down the sensitive column of her throat. She tilted her head back instinctively, giving him more access, a soft moan escaping her when his teeth grazed her skin.
"You taste so good," he groaned against her neck, his voice thick with desire. His hands moved to the hem of her shirt, fingers curling underneath the fabric as he paused, looking up at her with those piercing eyes. "Can I? Let me see you, baby. All of you."
She nodded, her cheeks heated up but her eyes locked on his, unwavering. In one swift motion, he tugged her shirt over her head, tossing it aside before his hands came to rest on her hips again. His gaze raked over her exposed skin, taking in every curve, every inch of her with a reverence that made her feel like she was something sacred.
"Fuck," he breathed, his voice trembling. "Look at you... You're perfect." His hands slid up her sides, his touch firm yet gentle, like he was memorising her. "Every part of you... I want to worship it."
Her breath caught as he sank to his knees in front of her, his hands gripping her thighs as he pressed a kiss to her stomach. It was tender, almost reverent, but the look he gave her when he glanced up was anything but innocent. Heat burned in his eyes, dark and hungry, and it sent a thrill shooting through her.
"Drew..." His name fell from her lips like a prayer, her hands clawing at the sides of his face for anything to grip onto as he began to trail kisses lower, his lips brushing against the band of her pants. He hooked his fingers in the waistband, tugging them down slowly, his lips following the path they took until she was standing there in nothing but her bra and underwear.
His hands slid around to her ass, squeezing gently as he nuzzled against her stomach, pressing another kiss there. "So fucking gorgeous," he muttered, his breath hot against her skin. "I don't know how anyone could ever talk shit about you. You're a goddamn masterpiece."
She whimpered, her chest tightening as he continued his descent, kissing and nipping at her thighs, her hips, anywhere he could reach. His hands slid up her legs, pushing them apart as he settled between them, his face level with the apex of her thighs.
"Drew, please..." Her voice broke, her body trembling with anticipation as he looked up at her, his eyes locking onto hers. There was something raw and primal in his expression, something that made her stomach flip and her core ache with need.
"Tell me what you want," he said, his voice rough, husky, sending a jolt of electricity through her. "I'll give you anything. Everything."
She swallowed hard, her chest heaving as she struggled to form words. "I... I want you. All of you."
A slow smirk spread across his face, wicked and knowing, as he leaned in, pressing a kiss to the inside of her thigh. "Then you've got me."
His mouth found her center, hot and insistent, and her knees nearly buckled as a loud moan tore from her throat. His tongue dragged along her slit, teasing, tasting, before delving deeper, burying itself in her folds with a groan that vibrated against her sensitive flesh.
"Oh my god..." Her head tipped back, her nails scraping against his scalp as he worked her over, his tongue flicking and circling her clit with expert precision. He alternated between long, languid strokes and quick, erratic flicks, driving her closer and closer to the edge with every movement.
"Drew, I—fuck, I'm—" Her words dissolved into incoherent gasps and whimpers as the pressure built, her hips rocking against his face as he devoured her. His hands gripped her thighs, keeping her steady as his tongue worked her relentlessly, each lick and suck bringing her closer to oblivion.
And then, just as she was about to tip over, he pulled away, leaving her teetering on the edge, desperate and aching. She cried out in frustration, her hands clutching at him as he stood, towering over her with a predatory grin.
"Not yet, baby," he murmured, his voice thick with arousal. He reached behind her, unhooking her bra and letting it fall to the floor. His hands immediately cupped her breasts, his thumbs brushing over her nipples, eliciting a sharp gasp from her. "I'm not done worshiping you."
He bent his head, capturing one nipple in his mouth, sucking and biting gently as his free hand drifted lower, slipping beneath the waistband of her underwear. She moaned loudly, her hips jerking forward as his fingers teased her entrance, circling but not quite entering.
"Drew, please..." Her voice was pleading, broken, her body writhing under his touch. He chuckled darkly, releasing her breast to kiss her deeply, his tongue plunging into her mouth as his fingers finally pushed inside her, stretching her deliciously.
"You're so wet for me," he growled against her lips, his fingers pumping in and out of her at a torturously slow pace. "Is this what you want? Hmm?" He added a third finger, curling them just right, and her entire body went taut, a strangled cry escaping her.
"Yes! Oh god, yes..." Her hands clawed at his shoulders, her hips rolling against his hand as he fucked her with his fingers, each thrust sending shockwaves of pleasure through her. His thumb found her clit, rubbing tight circles that had her vision blurring, her breaths coming in short, ragged gasps.
"Come for me, baby," he commanded, his voice deep and gravelly, sending a shiver down her spine. "Let me feel you."
And just like that, she shattered, her orgasm crashing over her in waves so intense she thought she might drown. Her cries echoed through the room as he held her through it, his fingers continuing to move inside her, drawing out every last bit of pleasure until she was boneless, trembling in his arms.
When he finally pulled his fingers free, she sagged against him, her legs barely able to support her weight. He caught her easily, his strong arms wrapping around her as he pressed a tender kiss to her forehead.
"See?" he murmured, his voice soft now, filled with affection. "Perfect."
Tumblr media
betty’s notes ౨ৎ ⋆。˚
this was such a sweet request, and i really hope it was exactly what you wanted anon !! i’m so sorry this is so late, but i’m trying to work through all my requests and i’m almost half way there :)
as a curvy gal myself, this was just so cathartic to write and i really hope others feel the same when reading this !! you’re all so so so gorgeous in your own ways and ily all sm <333
26 notes · View notes
maxdibert · 3 days ago
Note
What do think of the opinion that Snape's bullying would've been taken seriously by the professor's and students if he were a girl? I remember when I was more active in the fandom, I saw a lot of people who thought that SWM would've played out differently if it were a teen girl getting assaulted in broad daylight and that everyone would've been disgusted with the marauders.
I personally don't agree with that. I don't understand why people act as if women's SA is punished and society just comes to the defense of girls when it's only been recently that people started taking it more seriously (and even still, SA doesn't seem to have gotten less common). I believe it 100% would've been brushed off as 'boys being boys' and a female Snape would've still been denied her justice and made to be quiet about her abuse, ESPECIALLY considering the time period and how traditional we assume the wizarding world to be.
What I do think would've been different is the fanbase's perception of the marauders, but I don't think the canon characters would be too different.
I like to think that the hate wouldn’t be the same, but in the end, many female characters are even more hated than Severus for far less questionable things because hating women is an international sport, especially in fiction. Although I don’t know, since the topic of sexual assault is very delicate, I’ve still heard that narrative from some haters that “Snape had it coming,” and I can imagine them saying the same if he were a girl. That would be the absolute worst because if they justify SA when it’s so clearly condemned culturally, those people really need psychological intervention.
I believe Severus is the fandom’s punching bag. There’s always a character like that in any fandom where people act and express opinions completely irrationally because they think it’s entirely justified to hate the character and that any bad thing that happens to them is understandable or “deserved.” And that doesn’t depend on gender.
Anyway, I think the most problematic part of the hate towards Severus is that people have completely lost their way in terms of the narrative. Most of the statements they make are false or a distortion of the facts. They don’t even consider the context or the character himself. They simply need a villain, and he’s easy to vilify because he was ugly and unpleasant, which says very little about the ethics of those people, honestly.
21 notes · View notes
iwantmochisoup · 1 month ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
so, salt shared a 'salt brush set' with me, have some i liked while playing around with them :3c
1K notes · View notes
plutonious · 1 month ago
Text
Tumblr media
experimentation is forever and ever and emmet is guinea pig
113 notes · View notes
kyouka-supremacy · 13 days ago
Text
//
36 notes · View notes
ishikawayukis · 4 months ago
Text
obviously they won't say anything about it because they only comment on things that are nonsensical, but even kcarats are mad about this collab so i do wonder if they'll end up saying anything or will just act stupid lmfao
15 notes · View notes
tbob-enthusiast · 8 days ago
Text
Messy school doodles HAHEHHE
Tumblr media
Season 2 Robbie (not canon Robbie ofc, but rather the "S2" of my own fic which I may or may not ever finish). The lore is that his hair was MUCH longer than this, but it got shaved off due to Lore Reasons™ and now it's growing back :]
Tumblr media Tumblr media
NOT STAN. That's my beta Dipper HAHEHHEE. My notes are just emphasizing how similar they look. Me, earlier today, drawing beta Dipper: "STAN PINES ?! 😨😮😮😨😨😨"
Perhaps. Gay people. I am thinking about it really hard fr
#sometimes writing a story is toying with different dynamics and being like “auughh i LOVE this plotline but it'd go completely against -#- everything else in the whole story 😭“ so I gotta kill my darlings.#and I don't mean “killing off a character”#i mean “killing off this cool ass dynamic that sounds awesome but may not fit the story I'm trying to tell”#anyway#gay people... perhaps#do you see the amazing dynamic these two would have in the context of the story I'm making ??? no you don't#because i haven't told you anything about my story LMAO AHDHABHAHAHR#but point is: i love them#god#toxic yaoi is real#they've got the situationship that can almost rival whatever the hell Stanford Pines had going on (unfortunately they do not beat him)#they've got a dynamic that makes others think they don't care about eachother at all. that they hate eachother and that's all#and they DID hate eachother for most of their time together but after a bunch of years spent with no one else to rely on except eachother?#maybe you DO hate them still. but you can't deny the bond you share because the only other person in the world who GETS IT is him#you've seen him at his best and worst. you've driven him to the brink of insanity. you've taken everything from him#and yet you cuddle when the night is cold and it's so so lonely outside#you know how he likes his pancakes. how he'd rather cut his hair off than brush it. how he's entranced by the stars he never saw so clearly#you recognize when he's about to have a panic attack. you sit with him til he calms down. you hold hands and miss your families together#and you know he's the toughest person you know. so the occasional bang sessions? oh; those are NOT gentle#there's nothing more than a single safeword they never used more than once. because they've been together for so long and they know how far-#-they can push until it becomes too much. but to be gentle? to be soft? to a person who has grown so used to dodging your knives?#that is a whole entire INSULT !!! how DARE you treat me like I'm fragile NOW after we spent our lives on opposite sides of a battlefield?#how DARE you be gentle to me now after you ripped open my guts and shoved salt and dirt inside?#you know how much i can handle and you know I've always loved the thrill#so don't you dare make this any less of a battle unless you want me to bash your head in with a hammer. moron#the real valenpines dynamic i stg. i love them so much you don't understand#i can't believe I'm gonna have to sacrifice this dynamic#robbie valentino#dipper pines
3 notes · View notes