#i still do it with fennel seeds but they don’t hurt so.
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one thing about women is that they will eat. ingredience
#typing this while chewing on pieces of candied ginger.#when i was a kid i used to take a handful of cardamom and just shove it in my mouth and it was so delicious.#and then i would crumple over and die from the stomachache#i still do it with fennel seeds but they don’t hurt so.#‘these are ingredients not food’ you fool. you rube. you cretin. ilove….. ingredience. in#my mouth.now.#also coming back to the ginger I love ginger so much because it has this kick to it? so when you eat it-#it burns the back of your throat SO good.#i used to take little sips of nail polish remover as a kid because it’d burn my lips & tongue & I liked the feeling.#✧.*🌹
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The Lantana and Verbena Report: Did they attract pollinators as you promised?
(L) Coleus in front of ‘Little Joe’ Joe Pye Weed; (R) Persian Shield with sweet potato vine.
About a year ago I asked you guys – the savvy, experienced gardeners who read this blog – for what “Potted Annuals for Pollinators” you’d recommend. I was unhappy with some annuals I’d been growing near my front door – which do soooo well but attract nothing. But what could I grow instead, here and in the tomato-red pots in my back garden where the ‘Standing Ovation’ Little Bluestem weren’t standing after all, and were so lackluster that even a commenter here on the Rant called them “underwhelming”? The truth hurts!
(I’m keeping the Persian Shield+sweet potato vine combo shown above despite their lack of appeal for pollinators (though holes in the vine tell me it’s supporting something). Look how great they still looked on November 1 when this photo was taken! And in this spot very close to my front door, I’m okay with no flowers and no bees, which I don’t want in my house.)
Back to the question I asked readers – out of concern for wildlife, sure, but also, selfishly, so that I could enjoy watching them from my patio – your answers were almost thrilling in the possibilities they opened up for this old gardener.
You suggested:
Annuals: Salvia ‘Lady in Red,’ butterfly sage (Salvia guaranitica), Salvia guaranitica ‘Black and Blue’, blue salvias generally, lantana (several votes), verbena, verbena bonariensis, pentas, ‘African Blue’ basil, bronze fennel, zinnias, Anise hyssop (Agastache foeniculum) (several votes), ‘Truffela Pinks’ Gomphrena, Lacy Phacelia, Teddy Bear sunflowers.Perennials: Red Valerian, lavender, Calamintha nepeta, single dahlias, catmints, gaillardias, “almost anything in the mint family, which includes Salvias,” wax begonias for hummingbirds, and as a filler, small hostas like ‘Golden Tiara’ or ‘Rainbows End.’
Wow!
What I Bought – Lantana ‘Red Spread’
After reading Ranter Elizabeth’s praise for the annuals she buys online, I chose one of her favorite suppliers (Select Seeds) and ordered some lantanas, and boy, did they perform! They bloomed like crazy until the first hard frost, and the growth pattern is perfect – mostly horizontal, so there’s need to hack them back to prevent flopping. I love the bold, vibrant color! Another wonderful surprise is that they don’t need deadheading. Not only do they bloom just fine without it, but the dying blooms (above) still look good right up until they fall off, so why bother?
Pollinator-wise, they performed like the champs you guys promised they’d be. Honestly I’d need a much better camera to capture the critters in stills, but I took videos throughout the season and I’ll have a short compilation to show you soon. (Preview: it’s the hummingbirds, sometimes two at a time, that steal the show.)
Here in my back garden, by mid-July I’d given up on the grasses in these pots and replaced them with some ‘Havana Red Sky’ lantanas that I found at my local farmer’s market. They took off right away and at the end of the season they were this size. And what a great match for the pots!
I was also happy to learn that lantanas are less thirsty than other annuals – I don’t think I ever saw them wilt.
What I Bought – Verbenas
The other completely new-to-me plant I bought from Select Seeds is this ‘Vanity’ verbena, which did attract some bees and butterflies but didn’t have much impact in my border. I’m going to try a shorter, bushier variety next time.
Extended Season for Pollinators – Done!
My tiny front garden was already attracting critters to the Joe Pye Weed, bronze fennel, Nepeta and wood aster, but with the addition of tropical annuals like verbena and especially lantana, the wildlife action now goes on continuously for a very long season.
Happier Gardener – Done!
So yeah, I love upping my garden’s game at performing important eco-services, like supporting pollinators.
But I’ll tell ya, adding SO many flowers to this small space outside my front door, near the patio where I sit and gaze upon the garden – that’s been thrilling! The combination of floral beauty with stunning insects swarming over them in the sun. You could say it’s upped my mental well-being.
Flowers just make us happy! They attract people to gardening and then reward their efforts with beauty to be enjoyed by them and their family and visitors.
Next month I’ll be ordering even more of your suggestions, for planting in pots and also to fill in open spots in my borders:
More ‘Red Spread’ lantana, plus some ‘Cherry Sunshine’‘Graffiti’ pentas‘Lollipop’ verbena‘Black and Blue’ salviaCosmos seedsPurple Bell vineI’ve already ordered a dwarf canna from a specialist, to replace the (nonblooming) banana in my largest pot.
That’s a lot to look forward to, for not a lot of money, or effort.
The Lantana and Verbena Report: Did they attract pollinators as you promised? originally appeared on GardenRant on December 22, 2023.
The post The Lantana and Verbena Report: Did they attract pollinators as you promised? appeared first on GardenRant.
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✧・゚:* our proper distance
summary. if sukuna notices the life growing within you, separated only by your flesh as he lays his head in your lap, he says nothing. series. history lesson. bonus scene ! pairing. ryomen sukuna x f!reader. warnings. mentions of miscarriages. childbirth. word count. 2922.
You spend every day waiting for the other shoe to drop. You had already asked much of him in keeping this liaison secret. That he was willing to compromise for you was a miracle in and of itself. You do not mistake his generosity for kindness. You are well aware that your safety and well-being relies on his good will.
You have been Ryomen Sukuna’s mistress for four years. You have been his lover for roughly half of your sons’ lifetimes, and you have shouldered this secret alone for four years out of fear for their safety. And although the King of Curses, whose power has only grown since he bested your father in combat, is known to sorcerers as cruel and greedy, he cares in some way for the lives of your children. He would not hold his tongue otherwise.
Twins are a bad omen because of Sukuna, after all.
For someone whose followers regularly burn your families’ crests, Sukuna goes to greater lengths than he needs to in order to protect you. You’re still amazed that he even wants to defend you at all. He is not exactly wanting for bedmates — and you have to admit that despite the inhumanity of his form, he is still just as handsome as he was when he bore the name Shun. You do not dare to believe that you are someone special to him. You do not dare to hope.
He comes to you under the cover of night, and you learn to recognize his silhouette in front of the screen door when the moon is at its highest. You light a lantern by your door when your husband is with his other wives, though Sukuna still comes even when it isn’t there. Some nights he is content to lounge with you. His predisposition to getting his hair stroked is exceedingly feline.
That isn’t to say that he doesn’t lay with you. Such intimacy was how your relationship started, after all. From your first time in the fields beyond your father’s walls, to when he presses you into the futon in your husband’s home, Sukuna is no stranger to any inch, any measure of your body. You have come to know his as well, tracking every change with every moon. You are certain you are more familiar with him than he is with you, however, as you have never seen fit to tell them about the children.
Or, rather, the children that never came to be.
Over the years, there have been ten. Each one, you have hidden from the King of Curses. Your husband is not subject to such deceit. If anything, your infertility works in your favor. He does not come to see you as often anymore, unhappy as he is with the fact that you’ve yet to bear him any heirs besides Michimaru and Takechiyo. It gives you more time to spend with your sons — and more time with Sukuna, who does not seem particularly bothered that you have not granted him children either, despite the many times you have been together.
You wonder if you mistake his satisfaction for indifference. Perhaps he does not want the hindrance of children in his grand ambitions. He is not the most fatherly of men — although, thinking about it, you suppose you do not know any good fathers in the first place.
Sukuna’s warmongering is the last thing you would wish to subject a child to, and your sons are already afraid enough of him as it is. Your family does a good job at spreading fear and panic where Sukuna is concerned. You haven’t yet told the boys that they had already met him when he was just a man.
Regardless of his intentions, there was never anything to truly fear, as none of his seed ever took — that is, until this last moon.
You were so certain that it was impossible, that perhaps someone had cursed you. You had proved fertile enough not long after your marriage. It was strange to think that you would bear twins and nothing more. Spending the better part of your life valued only for your womb, your failure to produce more children was met with plenty of speculation, both by yourself and your immediate family. Sukuna, conversely, asked nothing of you but your company. You took solace in that fact, pitiable as it may seem.
And so, when he comes to you on a new moon, his eyes sparkling with mirth as he steps into your quarters, you are at a loss. He notices it too, as he remarks that you look like a trembling doe. It’s not the most flattering creature to be compared to, but you smile indulgently at him nonetheless. When you gesture for him to sit with you, he lays his head in your lap as always.
It is routine — you start by combing his hair away from his face, your hand tracing the familiar curve of his skull as you rub soothing circles into his scalp with the pads of your fingers. Sukuna’s eyes flutter shut at your motion, and your other hand wraps around his face to stroke his jaw. You could almost swear that he starts to purr, though you’re certain he would put you to death for ever suggesting it. At this angle, he is worryingly close to your unborn child. He says nothing to indicate that he knows of its presence.
“You look tired,” you murmur. “I could have Kinu bring us some tea, if you like.”
Sukuna lifts a hand. “Don’t bother. Just keep doing what you’re doing.” He exhales as you massage his temples. “Yes, just like that.”
“I insist.” He’s horrible to deal with when he’s cranky and you’re not in the mood. When you do not let him bruise your wrists, your hips, or your thighs, he turns to cutting words instead. He hasn’t shown any signs of displeasure yet, but you know that he is nothing if not unpredictable. It never hurts to be proactive. “Whatever you want.”
“Fine,” hums Sukuna, one of his lower eyes cracking open. “Fennel.”
Thoughtlessly, your smile drops. He notices, as the other three eyes are suddenly peering at you with suspicion.
Your servants don’t know of Sukuna — at least, that is what you are content to believe. If they have any idea that you have a lover, they say nothing to your husband and they say nothing to you. You do not want to know of their suspicions, of the knowledge that they may hold over you. You cannot spend every day looking over your shoulder from those you spend nearly every waking moment with.
But of your current predicament, they know every detail. Everything to do with your monthly blood, with the miscarriages, to the morning sickness, they’ve cleaned it all. And in doing so, you like to believe that they feel some loyalty to you. It helps you sleep at night. And because they know of the happenings of your body, they know that asking for fennel tea is asking for more blood to clean from your sheets. Infinitely more difficult than vomit, you suspect.
“Do you take issue with my choice?”
You blink, remembering yourself. Shaking your head, you try to move back, only to be pinned by the weight of Sukuna’s torso. You could shove him off, but that wouldn’t end well for anyone. “It’s fine, I just… remembered that we have run out of fennel tea, that is all.” You smile at him, and you notice through your mirror that it is too wan to seem genuine. Your heart sinks as the skepticism remains in his gaze.
“You are distressed,” Sukuna says plainly. “What have you done?”
You furrow your brows. What have you done to me? you wish to ask. You do not. “Nothing,” you hiss instead. Your scandalized tone amuses him; you can tell by the curve of his lips. He’s going to push you more. You place a hand over his mouth before he can, then yelp as he swipes his tongue across your palm. You wipe it on his kimono. “You’re disgusting. Who knows what I’ve touched?”
“It better not have been anything foul or I’ll sever these pretty hands myself.” Sukuna says the words so sweetly, they leave his lips like a song.
You run your fingers through his hair again in reply, and he chuckles.
“All right, I suppose I’ll spare you for now.” He tilts his chin up to meet you halfway when you lean down and kiss him, nibbling on your lower lip. He chases after you when you part, and he wraps a hand around the back of your head to pull you in again. “I knew there was a reason I kept you around.”
“I think I should be the one saying that about you.”
Sukuna relaxes in your lap once again, contentment flitting across his face. “That was a valiant effort at sidestepping my question, and for that, I shall reward you with leniency.”
There’s always some sense of serenity around him, even in the midst of carnage and peace alike. Like he belongs in this world, a curse that will never, ever, leave. He is tranquil in the midst of the chaos he sows — a figure of balance. That is how the commoners who champion him refer to the Two-Faced Spectre. You envy his level of self-satisfaction. Were that all the world felt as confident and assured as Sukuna, there would be a great deal less bloodshed, you think.
Rather — knowing mortals as they are, there would be infinitely more. But Sukuna would like that, you suppose.
He interrupts your contemplation by taking your hand and sliding it over his hair again. “Did I say that you could stop?”
No. He most certainly did not. With a weary chuckle, you appease him, and he takes your other hand to press a kiss into your palm. The two of you settle in silence until the candles wind down, and when they no longer provide adequate light, you lean over to blow them out and invite Sukuna to lay with you. He reads in your expression that your only intention is to sleep, and without protest, he climbs into the futon alongside you. He takes up most of it, though you are used to that.
Sukuna lies on one side. Given the excessive amount of limbs, you doubt that the position is very comfortable. He was steps and a couple of drinks away from conjuring himself a tail, though, so you suppose that most of the reason that Sukuna doesn’t sleep is because of the discomfort. Nevertheless, he likes to hold you when you sleep, his arms like a cage. As you settle into his embrace, you find that it is tighter than usual. You fold your hands over your stomach, pressing your back into his chest.
One of his hands rests on your shoulder, while his other arm on the same side winds around your waist. He lays that hand on top of yours. Though he isn’t pressing very hard, you feel every point of his nails like the tip of a blade against your belly. You roll over so that the pin-pricks are against the flesh of your back. As you tilt your head up to meet his gaze, you’re marveled by how… familial the embrace is.
Mother and father on either side, and the child sleeping soundly in the middle. It is a fool’s dream to ever think it could become a reality. But the thought still lingers in your mind — what if?
Would he run away with you? Abandon everything he’s ever worked for to raise your child (children, possibly) in obscurity. A fisherman like his father, who abandoned him as a child to be taken in by your family, ostensibly to give him a better life. You’d be a… gods, what could you do? Weave, perhaps? Something useful, at least. To show that you were not the spoiled little girl he always made you out to be.
And would your child be a sorcerer? Would they be a simpleton, like you, or would they be as powerful and fearsome as their father? Would ambition consume them, just as it had the man you loved?
Alas, you are a fool to even dream it. The four-armed could-be fisherman traces a finger along your neck, a brow arched.
“Is my face truly so mesmerizing?” he whispers, eyes sparkling. The mirth dissipates when you don’t react, and he instead leans away from you and props himself up on his lower elbow. He watches you not as one would a lover, but the way a hunter stalks its prey — like he’s waiting for any misstep he could leap upon. “All right, come out with it.”
“What?” The word doesn’t sound convincing, even to yourself. Your failure at duplicity causes both disappointment and disdain to war upon Sukuna’s face. Quickly, you lift your hands to appease him. “I’ve just been feeling a little tired these days is all. I’ve already sent for a healer, surely they can figure out what’s wrong with me.”
“Is there any better healer in the province than yourself?” he scoffs. You are not sure whether to be flattered by the praise, spoken with venom, or not. “If there were anyone with a greater grasp on reverse cursed technique they may very well be a god.”
You stroke his jaw tenderly with the backs of your fingers, rubbing a thumb across his cheek. “Not every malady can be healed by my power,” you remind him. To be fair, you did actually call for a second opinion. You could simply be suffering through some foodborne illness — but you know your body best, and you know now that there is something dwelling within it. You have called for a midwife, just to make sure. “I will be fine.”
“I don’t like seeing you upset.” Sukuna’s lips form a scowl. “Tell me what to do to make it stop.”
His words give you pause, an incredulous laugh nearly bubbling out of you. You subdue yourself, but the wonder is still there. You tuck yourself into him to hide your mirth.
Is this the closest you’ll ever get to genuine romance from him? You know that you can never tell him anything. And while you’d think yourself a monster if he was anyone else, you know the child will be safer if they had never known of Sukuna at all.
How on earth would you tell the child their father was a beast? You could lie to them, pretend that your husband was the one that sired them. You could never tell them at all, and leave it until their adulthood before they found the truth. Then you would be no better than the family you tried to escape.
You had always thought yourself a decent mother, fair and loving. But a child of Sukuna could never know a world of peace, and with how irrevocably you have become intertwined with him, you could not give the child the peaceful, happy life it deserved.
Your brother’s wife has a sister in Mino. Perhaps she will raise your baby as her own.
“There’s nothing you can do,” you murmur into the side of his neck. You can feel a rumbling in his throat, a low growl in reply. When you stroke his back, he stills. There is virtually no space between you, and you can feel the mouth on his stomach shift against your midsection. Instinctively, you slide a hand over yourself as a barrier.
He doesn’t seem to notice the defensive gesture, and for that, you are thankful. Sukuna never sleeps when he is with you, only laying in a facsimile of it in his stillness and steadiness while you actively slumber. He is always gone in the morning when you wake, but if you are (un)lucky, you can still catch his scent on you. As you lean back to rub noses with him, you find him staring at you intently. Eyes like piercing daggers, you have no doubt he has watched you like this many nights before.
“Nothing at all.” It is not a question. It is said with malice, with suspicion.
Your little fantasy of a life with him seems ever further away. A fool’s delusion.
This man does not love you — he loves how much he can control you. He loves that you sit prettily in the palm of his hand, that you give him everything without protest. He loves that he always leaves you wanting for more. He loves that you lie for him, that you live a double life only for him. He loves the feeling of turning you against his greatest enemies, even if that was never true.
He loves that he is one of the only reasons you are ever happy. He loves that you are afraid of his moods, and that you do all that you can to please him. He loves that do as he asks in all respects but one. He loves that you are so small against him, so frail. He loves you most when you are at your weakest. He loves only as a monster loves.
You cannot — you will not ever allow him to sink his claws into this child.
You press a gentle kiss to Sukuna’s lips, a false promise. “Nothing at all.”
#ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna x reader#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#history lesson bonus.#history lesson tag.#jjk fic.#i think my writing says something about how much i fucking love sleeping and napping#considering how often the couples end up in bed
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The Stone’s Toll - Chapter Nine
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Jamie woke that morning, to his wife tangled around him. The singular thing driving him was between his legs. He kissed her neck and tugged at her skin with a sharp sting. Claire stirred and smiled up at him. Gathering her bottom lip between his teeth, his hands meandered down her shoulders, to the slope of her breasts, to her abdomen, and finally lifted the plump piece of flesh that he loved so much.
“Is this real? Are you real?”
“Would I do this if I was only a dream Sassenach?” He pinched the backside of her arse and grinned. She yelped in response and swatted his fingers away from the now stinging flesh.
“You’re real.” She smiled and placed her palms on either side of his jaw.
“I’ll prove just how real enough I am lass.” He smirked and moved his hands away from her backside, further down to cup between her legs.
“Jamie. Stop.” Claire panted out.
“Have I hurt ye, Claire?” He immediately pulled away, hovering over her and softly brushing her sides.
“No, but there are some things I need to tell you… before we’re intimate.”
“Is this about Frank?”
“What? No! Why on earth would you be thinking about him?”
“Well did ye?-”
“Once. But I didn’t encourage it.” Her lips tightened into a line. “This isn’t what I wanted to talk about Jamie.”
Before he could eek out a livid response, Claire jumped out of the bed towards the corner of the room. Pulling out a small silver box inside her leather bag, she plucked out a dome-shaped cup. She had two more tucked away in the small metal tin. Her hands then grabbed purchase of a small vial within her medicine bag. The objects flew onto the bed and she plopped down next to Jamie.
“This,” she pointed to the vial, “is a concoction of fennel and posies.”
Jamie had grabbed the odd rubber cup and rolled it between his fingers. Claire swatted it out of his hands a little annoyed at her husband’s dirty fingernails; she would have to clean it again.
“And this,” she waved the small cup in front of his eyes, “is a diaphragm. Some call it a ‘womb veil’. These are all forms of birth control.”
“Birth… control?” He rolled out the syllables in his last word.
“Yes, preventative measures to avoid pregnancy.”
“Christ, ye would kill a bairn!” He immediately regretted his words as his wife recoiled and her eyes betrayed the hurt inside of her.
“No, because there would be none in the first place. It stops the sperm- seed from ever even getting into a woman to create the baby in the first place.”
“But surely God-” He spoke more softly.
“Would want me to use it.” Tears pricked at her eyes. “Jamie I’m not… I’m not ready.” Jamie shifted to hold his wife closer as the atmosphere changed from playful to sombre. “I couldn’t go through that again to not have my baby in my arms. I truly think it would kill me, it almost did.”
His heart softened at her admission and he knew he would do whatever would make her safe and happy, even if it meant a life of celibacy. But he hoped to God it would never come to that.
“I dinna want ye to bear another child. I wouldna risk your loss Sassenach.” Jamie carefully pulled a curl away from her eye. “Not for a dozen bairns. We’ve Fergus and our nephew and nieces- weans enough. And our two beautiful lasses are wi’ God. So,” he paused to blink away the moisture in his eyes and swallow down the tightness of his throat, “if this wee diaphragm,” he rolled the word around his tongue, ”and posy is what’ll help ye I’ll gladly pick it fer you every day if that’s your wish.”
He picked up the diaphragm from her hands again, inspecting it more closely. “How does this wee thing work?”
“Well, I place it inside me so it covers my cervix, it should rest comfortably against my pubic bone.”
“Ye put that… inside ye?” He was completely disturbed by the thought.
“It’s not like there hasn’t been anything in there before, and I’d dare say it was even larger than that ‘wee thing’.” She grabbed a healthy hold of him to emphasise her point.
“Aye, that it is.” He looked down with pride and she rolled her eyes at him, but couldn’t help the smile that tugged at her lips.
“I’ll have to take the herbs one more week, to be safe. Can you wait for me?”
“I’d wait forever if it came to it, fer ye Sassenach, always.”
“Well, and we can always do other things.” She flipped Jamie to his back and her head travelled down his body to the curls nestled atop his pubic bone. “So long as you don’t, ‘spill your seed’ inside of me. Well inside my-”
He expressed his agreement with a loud grunt.
Six days later, Jamie was practically jumping in his skin with anticipation. He had gone back to the cave, much to Claire’s dismay. Instructing her to stay at Lallybroch, he wasn’t surprised when her head of curls popped into the shadows of the fire in his small sanctuary. He was very attentive, eager to make sure she kept up her steady intake of fennel and posy. They spent most of the days cuddling together and ignoring anyone else but themselves when he wasn’t out hunting for food. Most of the food was sent off to Lallybroch through Fergus. She didn’t want to admit it, but they were both avoiding their family’s disorderly presence and unanswerable questions. Fergus stopped by frequently and Claire was glad of the company while Jamie was off. Claire spoke to both Jamie and Fergus about her many childhood adventures; those stories were safe from the fresh pang of loss she had endured. But Jamie finally put his foot down on the final night when Claire got a crick in her neck and returned her back, but her wee hands gripped him hard into their bed. There would be no returning to the cave.
Claire wrapped a shawl around her and tiptoed to the window. The sunrise was almost over, bringing with it an unusually bright and cloudless day. She peeked down across the courtyard, and her blood turned cold. Jamie was pulling up his breeks over his sark. Without hesitation, Claire shoved Jamie into the small wooden closet of the Laird’s room and quickly pulled the laces of her skirt and bodice. Not a moment later, the door banged open to the sight of a pock-marked redcoat. His eyes scanned the room and landed on the closet.
“Where is he?”
Claire played dumb, not willing to speak to reveal that her accent would be the same as his. That would raise even more questions that she couldn’t possibly answer. The only thing she could think of at that moment was to play into the delicacy of her gender and faint into his arms. With an overdramatic flare of the back of her hand to her forehead, she slumped onto the floor.
Her prone position reminded her of another stiff surface. A cold metal sheet, uncaring hands, and a pressure in circles on her temples. Panic squeezed her throat and veins.
“Captain! This woman needs assistance up here!”
But it was Jenny who appeared at the door, not the Captain.
She gathered Claire onto her lap as best as she could being so far along in her pregnancy. “Oh no! My puir cousin! Ye see she had a great fall one day. The tragedy took her speech and now she has spells such as these all the time. I’m heart sorry ye had to see that Corporal…?” Claire relaxed into the familiar arms, so different from the ones that had restrained her.
“Lieutenant Wilson.” He puffed out his chest.
“Weel, Lieutenant, as ye can see my cousin Mistress Malcolm has taken up residence in this room recently. Bless her soul, the accident that stole her speech took her husband as well.”
The redcoat placed his tricorn over his heart and bowed his head. “Terribly sorry madame. Thank you for your cooperation.”
“O’ course, now away wi’ ye, we must prepare yer meal.”
Jenny was panting and gripped Claire’s hand when the soldier whipped out of sight. Liquid seeped down her skirts and to the stone floor below. “Jenny-”
“We must tend to the redcoats first.”
“No. Jenny. You’re only eight months along. We need to see to you immediately.”
“The Lieutenant-”
“Can go hang. Ian and Mrs. Crook will see to them.”
Jamie slipped out undetected down to the root cellar.
Jenny cursed, screamed and paced around her room. The midwife was impossible, refusing to sanitise properly before touching Jenny and Claire finally kicked her out. No woman like that would be touching her sister nor her future niece or nephew. Jenny slumped into the bed with Claire’s help when her labouring was over. Caitlin Maisri Murray was impossibly tiny when she met the world. No screams wrenched through her tiny lungs and Claire was immediately pressing the child to her thigh. Her forefinger and middle finger pushed into her chest and she breathed into the limp body. Finally, her chest heaved two minutes later, and her loud banshee shrieks filled the room. Her niece was a fighter. With her help, she would weather her first days, which would soon turn into thousands.
She had taken up massaging the baby girl to soothe her traumatised muscles from the hard birth. Claire cradled her niece’s turned head carefully in her hand and propped her stomach on her legs. Her hands began to deftly massage the exhausted baby’s back, legs, and arms, and once she was finished she gave a small peck to her wee nose. She still had a lot of growing to do to recover, but Claire was certain she would become a scraggly and loose-toothed toddler and a beautiful teenager before growing into the mature young woman she could envision her as now. Opening her bright eyes, moisture gathered at the corner of her aunt’s eyes in reaction to the brilliant colour. They were so like Jamie’s, and she knew not all babies kept their original colour, but she hoped. Would her daughters’ eyes have looked like this?
The men had all dispersed for drinks in the Great Room downstairs and Claire brought Ian over to the side to share the great news. She signalled with her hands to keep up the pretence of her muteness but whispered quietly with nearly closed lips as well to Ian. The Captain, Claire presumed, sauntered over to her and held out a paper. Laird MacKenzie sprawled across the material in an adolescent scrawl.
“A letter for your Mistress. We thank you for your hospitality and wish her congratulations.” Claire nodded and tucked the paper into the pocket beneath her skirts.
It was dark, the middle of night, and Jamie snuck back in when the redcoats mounted their horses. He fell asleep immediately tucked into his wife. She grabbed the small grey tin from within her leather bag and pulled out the diaphragm. She adjusted it inside her until it laid comfortably and sighed. It had been days since her return, filled with distress and sickness, panic and dismay, and the events of the past few months had come crashing down upon her once again. She needed her husband. Crawling over him, he woke from his slumber. He grinned up at her and slowly came back to reality.
“Thanks to yer quick-thinking Sassenach, not only was my life saved but my wee niece and all in Lallybroch.”
“You saved my life James Fraser, on more accounts than one. I thought it might be fair for me to return the favour.” Claire smirked and rolled their bodies so she straddled him. “And not only that, I want to protect you forever Jamie. To see you safe until we’re old and grey, with an army of grand nephews and nieces, and the grandchildren Fergus will bless us with, to surround us. You can’t get rid of me ever again.” She softly kissed his forehead, along his cheeks, the tip of his nose, and slowly brushed her lips against his eager ones.
“Och, Sassenach. Stuck with ye for life? I can think of worse.” He stared back at his wife with mischief in his eyes and adjusted his body so they were both on their sides.
Claire rolled her eyes as she lightly slapped his arm. She leaned even closer to him, which seemed impossible with their skin flushed up together already. Her thumb trailed a line across his bottom lip and she replaced it with her own mouth.
“Make love to your wife.” She whispered, obstructed by his lips but he heard her like his life depended on the very cadence of her voice. Claire let go of his lips to kiss the spot behind his ear that made him squirm. “Make love to me Jamie.”
Their lovemaking was frantic, both seemingly clawed to possess every inch of skin.
When they laid dazed on their backs, recovering from their post-coital bliss, Jamie lightly pressed his fingers onto the fading burns on her stomach and traced up to the two identical circles on her temples. Her hand found the healing scar on his thigh and she stroked over the raised skin. She looked at the large gash across her husband's thigh, still red with the newness of the injury.
“How?”
“Culloden.” He gritted out. “How?”
Her hands guided his towards her stomach. “The stones.” Now, her temples. “Boston.”
She didn’t want to discuss it any further, just as he was reluctant to share the details of that dreary morning on the moor. She neglected the scar on her breast and he didn’t push any further for her to speak on it. Would he feel ashamed of her truth? Of course, he wouldn’t, but she did. It was difficult for her to think back on. Speaking on it would make it true, so she kept those memories locked tight in her brain. Maybe, with more time she could heal, and she would share everything with him completely like they once had been.
“Boston?”
“Danvers State Hospital to be specific. Or as some call it- will call it the State Lunatic Hospital at Danvers. Frank put me there when I-“
“Frank did this to you?” Jamie’s teeth clenched in anger and Claire could feel the heat radiating from his skin onto hers. “If he were here, I’d fight him fer ye Sassenach. I should ha’ never sent ye to him.”
“You couldn’t possibly have known. You were doing what you thought best, with the information we had at the time.”
“What is it, that left these scars on your puir heid?”
“They’ll fade. Soon there won’t even be a scar, I’m sure.”
“I dinna care about how they look on ye Sassenach, I care that ye went through pain to have them, I would ha’ gladly taken it myself.” His eyes were glossy as he implored her. “Now tell me.”
“In the asylum, they had these new treatments, electric shock therapy. They place these two rubber circles wrapped in like socks or something attached to a headband on your temples, and send volts of electricity through your brain. Like harnessing lightning right to your head.” His grip tightened, appalled at his wife’s description. “My mind was hazy for days, I couldn’t do much but stare listlessly at walls. I saw Fergus then, on the first night following the treatment, though I’m not sure he saw me.”
“He yelled out fer ye, almost at the same time every week.”
“Oh.” It felt better to know those nights he was truly there. “I was in there for little over a month, so I only had to endure it two times- wait no three, I think. I was a lot luckier than others, who were prisoners there for years on end. I shiver to think what that would have been like, a prisoner to your own mind and unable to say no to your jailer, or even saying no but them being apathetic towards your plight.”
“Fer all ye speak o’ the future, it doesna seem much better than now.”
“It’s true, some people use their innovations for evil then, that’s why the war I was in started. Evil exists in any time, in any place.”
“Weel I’m glad yer here in my arms, away from those mad bastards, and I know I can be there to fight anyone who wishes ye ill.” Her thigh began rubbing between his.
“I am too Jamie. So much.”
Laird and Lady clung tight to each other in their bed, in their home knowing they would have to leave tomorrow.
#outlander fanfiction#adsofraser writing#jamie x claire#jamie fraser#claire beauchamp#claire fraser#fergus fraser#canon divergence#craigh na dun#outlander fanfic
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Flowers
See the continuation here.
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A small plastic container fell off the lab table, scattering the small white seeds it had held onto the floor, where they bounced and rolled with reckless abandon. They 'pinged' softly against the linoleum flooring as they did so.
"Oh, no, Jack," said Maddie, dropping to her knees in an effort to stop some of them from rolling away, "these are our only graveflower samples! Help me find them!" She pushed the ones in front of her into a small pile. "I think some of them rolled that way, towards the portal." She nodded her head at the closed doors.
"Right-o!" said Jack, carefully shuffling away from the table and the other labeled seed containers. He too, dropped to his knees and started crawling over the ground, looking for the seeds.
The Fentons had decided to take a look at more traditional ghost hunting- and even ghost attracting- methods, most of which had to do with plants or rituals of one kind or another. Jack had taken a look at some of his ancestors' writings, and, although the plant they were most interested in, blood blossoms, were sadly extinct, they had found a number of other interesting claims. The seeds that had just been scattered across the floor were said only to germinate and bloom at the grave or death site of a person or animal that had become a ghosts, and they were exceedingly rare.
Some of the records of them they had found suggested that the size and number of the flowers were correlated with the power of the power of the ghost, but Maddie was skeptical. Actually, she'd been skeptical of the plant's properties in general, until their passive scans of the graveflower seeds had detected tiny amounts of ectoplasm inside them.
They were hoping to get permission to plant them on the graves of people generally believed to have become ghosts. If they could get them to germinate and breed, it would be a good test, and a warning to surviving family members.
But they couldn't do that if all their seeds rolled under cabinets.
They consolidated the seeds they had found and counted them out. Maddie sighed. "We're missing one," she said.
"I'm sorry, Mads," said Jack.
"It's fine, dear. We still have more than enough, and I'm sure it'll turn up eventually." She frowned at the overflowing cabinets. "It's probably over there, somewhere." She shook her head. "We'll deal with it later."
.
(The seed had not rolled under the cabinets.)
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Danny crept down the stairs to the lab in human form. He knew his parents had been looking into ghost-affecting plants, and he wanted to know which ones and if he should be worried. He also didn't want to risk being affected by something they already had down there. He didn't think seeds alone would do anything to him, but what if they had seedlings, cuttings, or things like that? It was best to take the precaution of staying human.
He was relieved to find that little, labeled boxes of seeds were all that he could see. He took a piece of paper from the table and started to copy down the names.
Some of them, he had encountered before. Once they had realized that the whole ghost thing wasn't going away, he, Sam, and Tucker had tested as many traditional ghost remedies as they could, including the plants sage, fennel, rowan, mullein, and rosemary. Few of them had done anything to Danny, in either form.
Danny didn't recognize all of them, however, and the ones he didn't know were the ones he was worried about. He didn't see anything labeled 'blood blossoms,' though, so he counted his blessings. He finished his list, and tucked it into his pocket before turning to the portal.
Frostbite and the other yetis were his best bet for knowledge on ghost health, and Danny didn't think he'd get another good chance to take the long trip to the Far Frozen once his parents got really invested in this project. If Frostbite didn't know, Danny would have to rely on Tucker's internet-fu and Sam's botanical knowledge.
He pressed his thumb against the DNA reader. A soft beep indicated that he'd been accepted, and the yellow-and-black striped portal doors whirred open. Behind them, the portal spiraled and swirled, subtly reaching out to Danny. Danny glanced back at the table full of seeds, and decided not to go ghost until he was safely in the Ghost Zone. He stepped through the portal.
.
(He did not notice the seed stuck to the sole of his shoe, nor did notice when it fell off as he walked through the portal tunnel.)
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"Frostbite said that they're all harmless," Danny told his sister. "As long as I don't eat them, and it's not like Mom and Dad are going to feed us the equivalent of ghost weed. Or ghost truth serum."
"They might, actually," said Jazz, dubiously. "You know how they are, sometimes. Especially if they think we've been overshadowed. But you're sure they won't affect you, otherwise?"
"Well, Frostbite said that some of them will smell really good, but it shouldn't be a compulsion for me to go eat them or lie in them or whatever. Just a nice smell."
"If you're sure," said Jazz. "What about the ghost detecting ones?"
Danny kicked the ground to make his desk chair spin. They were having this discussion in his room. Jazz was on the bed. "Probably not going to be a problem."
"Probably?"
"It's not like they follow ghosts around like the sun. They just absorb ectoplasm in the soil. What I'd really be worried about is the one that grows on ghosts' graves, but it isn't like they're going to try and plant one in the portal, so I think I'm safe there."
.
(The seed that had fallen inside the portal began to crack open.)
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Maddie frowned at the latest portal energy readings. Over the past week, they had been slowly, but surely, changing. It was as if there was a power drain, a slow leak, somewhere. She gazed at the portal's whirling surface. Even that looked off, the twisting pattern disrupted somehow.
"Jack," she said, "I think there's something the matter with the portal. Will you spot me while I check it out?"
"Sure thing, honey!" said Jack, putting down the grow-lamp they'd ordered for their plants and bounding over to the closet where they kept their ecto-exploration suits. He pulled hers free.
As she put on her suit, she wondered what could be causing the drain. A loose wire or tube? A ghost taking up residence in the tunnel? A bit of spectral debris? It could be anything. It might not even be something immediately visible on the surface.
Maddie shuddered at the idea of trying to fix something inside the walls while the portal was on. They couldn't just turn it off, unfortunately. They had tried that when ghosts first started coming through, but even the emergency power cutoff switch had failed to shut the portal down. The only effect was that they had lost a good deal of control over its power output, which made it much more dangerous to be around. So, they had restarted all of their containment and control procedures and had started to look into ways to close portals.
But it might not be an issue. There was no need to borrow trouble.
The helmet settled on the suit's neck piece with a click, and Maddie started going through her pressurization check. A small amount of ectoplasm wouldn't hurt, but she didn't want to be exposed to the amount that was free-floating in the Ghost Zone.
Besides, if there was a ghost camping out in their portal, the suit would protect her from its attacks.
Jack slid into the seat in front of the telemetry board. "Everything looks good, Mads!"
Maddie gave him two thumbs up and walked into the portal.
She was totally unprepared for what she saw.
There were vines curling up around the walls of the portal, meeting overhead. Roots dug into the metal plates and curled around delicate wires. Heavy, green-white buds hung between heart-shaped leaves. She realized with a jolt that she recognized them, if only from pictures.
"You okay in there, Maddie?" asked Jack over the suit intercom.
"I'm fine," said Maddie. "But I think I found where our missing graveflower seed went to."
"Huh? It's in there?"
"It grew," said Maddie. Even as she said it, she wondered how. They were only supposed to grow on a ghost's grave or death site. They had dug this tunnel themselves. No one was buried here. No one could have died here, either, this far under the earth.
At least, not recently. How far could a graveflower reach back? How far down? How far up? They had barely started their research...
"Are you sure?" asked Jack. "Can you get a sample?"
"Of course," said Maddie, removing a pair of clippers from her utility belt. She removed a branched that had curved out into the center of the portal, away from the wall.
But how were they going to get the rest out?
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Love Square Fluff Week: Day 3, Flowers
Also read on ao3!
Paring: Ladrien
Note: This takes place in an animal/shapeshifting AU I’m working on. Instead of superheroes their Miraculouses turn them into animals, and the general public is scared of them and their powers.
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“This is getting ridiculous!” Plagg snapped. “Utterly ridiculous!”
“Thanks Chloe,” Adrien said as he added his order to his cart, clicking to go pay. His kwami was hovering in front of his computer screen, paws crossed. “Don’t you have any cheese to go eat?”
“Don’t you have anything better to do than work on your fake garden!?”
“Why are you so opposed to it?” Adrien snapped.
“I’m not an idiot, kid!” Plagg growled. “I’ve been alive longer than you could comprehend. I’ve seen you Googling ‘what plants attract ladybugs’ and ‘what flowers do ladybugs like’, and you’re an idiot to think it’s actually going to work.”
“It already has worked,” Adrien replied, gesturing to below his window, which had been converted to a miniature garden of potted plants– several of which he had found ladybugs crawling on before.
It had taken Nathalie some convincing when he had first started ordering seeds, pots and potting soil– but after making up something about reading an article about having natural plants within your home could help you have clearer skin she had relented (on the condition that he didn’t get his room or clothes covered in dirt). Everything had to be contained to the long table that now rested below his window, but it was more than worth it.
Gardening had become a fun pastime for the long hours he was locked in his room, especially since he had been forbidden from a young age from helping out in the mansion garden by both his mother and father. As much as they loved the natural beauty on their property, they didn’t like it on their son. Still, some of his fondest memories with his mother had been them wandering out in their garden together, so having flowers and plants right in his room brought back some happy memories.
He also wondered if gardening was a fashion trend at the moment, as he noticed both Marinette and his father had an increase of potted plants on their balcony and office.
“There’s a difference between ladybugs and Ladybugs– she’s not about to come flying into your room because you have a bunch of cosmos planted,” Plagg said in exasperation. “Just because you can turn into an animal doesn’t mean you act like them.”
“Catnip,” Adrien said simply, which shut Plagg up– they had both agreed not to talk about the catnip incident after all.
He stood up, making his way over to his miniature garden. He had a variety of flowers: cosmos, marigolds, geraniums, and more. It was more than just garden of flowers too, fennel, cilantro, among other plants could be found in his collection. It all smelled quite nice (horrendous, in Plagg’s opinion), and helped to cover up the smell of Camembert that lingered on him and in his room (much to Plagg’s disappointment). They were all plants that were supposed attracted ladybugs, and while he wasn’t a hundred percent sure all the websites were true it seemed to have done its job, because he had found a few of the beetles in his little garden on days when he left the windows open.
None of them were Ladybug, though.
Perhaps it was a bit of wishful thinking, that Ladybug would just turn up in his room because of some plants, he was sure she wasn’t about to go flying into someone’s room (and why would she even be near his house?), but he would be lying if he said he wasn’t holding out that she might turn up. Sure he saw her quite often when they went to battle, but it wasn’t often they could just be together. The thought of seeing his Lady made his heart race, and just the knowledge that she was okay helped soothed nightmares of the battles they had faced.
Plagg let out a huff as he picked up his watering can to tend to his plants, diving into a laundry basket saying it smelled too fresh in here. Adrien could only smile, before staring out his window.
He wondered if infesting his plants with aphids would attract more ladybugs.
-----
Adrien grew bored of his piano practicing half way through it– so he switched on the recording of him playing and flopped onto his bed. Before school and Hawk Moth he had been content with playing the piano, but now that he had tasted freedom he found he grew bored much more easily. It wasn’t like he hated the piano, but his father’s expectations were too much at times.
He couldn’t turn on the TV, games, or music– that would be a dead give away for his fake practice, so he just laid there staring at the ceiling. Strange how doing nothing was more appealing than doing what he was told at times. Of course this only lasted for a couple of minutes, and he rolled off his bed to do his favorite thing his room had to offer: gardening.
His new supplies had arrived this morning, and he was happy to get to work planting the cosmos seeds he had just gotten– specifically white cosmos– which apparently were better at attracting ladybugs than the other colors he had. He didn’t know how true it was, but he was more than happy to try it. He filled up his newest pots with soil, humming to himself as he did so. It had taken him a while to learn not to over-water plants and sometimes he had forgotten to water them, but now he felt he was pretty good when it came to gardening.
He was pulled from his thoughts when he saw a small red figure on one of his marigold’s leaves.
It was a little ladybug, small enough to sit on the tip of his finger. Most people probably wouldn’t even blink at it, but all it took for him was a glance to recognize her. A shade of red that was so familiar it was comforting, five black dots that were perfectly round and perfectly symmetrical– two on each elytron, and one in the very center. A scientist would say that it didn’t resemble any known species of ladybug, but to Adrien all he saw was a being that meant nothing but safety and trust.
“Ladybug,” he whispered in awe, barely believing his eyes. She was here in his garden, Ladybug was right in front of him!
She stiffened up slightly as he spoke, before continuing to crawl along the leaf without a care, clearly just trying to act like a normal bug. He bounded over to her, kneeling down so they were closer to the same level, but he didn’t reach out to hold her like he often did when a ladybug found its way into his room. He stared at her for a few seconds, before realizing how creepy that probably was, and pulled back slightly.
It took everything he had not to say ‘My Lady’, because Plagg would probably Cataclysm him then and there for being such an idiot. He shifted back and forth, not quite sure what to do. He wanted to talk to her, but he also didn’t want to scare her off with being recognized.
���Um...” he began uncertainly, before clearing his throat. “Um, hi Ladybug. I know it’s you, er, by the way.”
The ladybug froze up once again, scurrying across the leaf, before once again trying to act like a normal bug that most certainly did not understand him and that he most certainly had misidentified. He had to hold back a laugh, because he knew that Ladybug had never been recognized when she was normal sized, only once she augmented did people realize she was one of the magical creatures that roamed the city.
He laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. “I... I honestly don’t know what to say. Er, thank you? I guess. For protecting Paris, you don’t get nearly enough credit as you deserve.”
Ladybug went still once more, recognizing that she had truly been recognized. She turned on the leaf she was on, staring at him with a look he couldn’t read. He found himself straining his mind, waiting to hear her words in his head, but he couldn’t unless he transformed himself. His heart sank slightly because of that, but still he smiled at her.
He wondered what he looked like to her with her so small. He knew her eyesight wasn’t like a regular ladybug, his research said they saw in black and white, while his Lady said she still saw in color. It was the same for him, he saw the same range of colors as when he was human, though his eyesight was much sharper when transformed.
“I hope this doesn’t sound weird, but I was actually hoping that you’d show up in my garden,” he said, rubbing the back of his head again. “I didn’t think you’d ever come though, but I planted it with you in mind. All these plants are supposed to be ones that ladybugs like– do you like them?”
He could see her hesitate, swaying slightly in place, before she gave a nod with her tiny head. It was hard to catch with her small form, but he knew it was a yes.
He smiled. “I’m glad to hear that. Um... could you go bigger? It’s kind of hard to see you when you’re so tiny.”
Again she hesitated, swaying adorably on her leaf, before going still. The center spot on her back vanished, and she slowly began to grow in size. A moment later there was a four-spotted ladybug clinging to the leaf, now roughly the size of a bottle cap– still small enough to be nimble and generally out of sight, but much too big to be a true ladybug.
He smiled. “That’s so cool,” he said, even though he could do the same himself when transformed, but he knew how nice it was to have a civilian that didn’t stare at them like they were a mutant. “It must feel pretty weird, I hope it doesn’t hurt.”
She shook her head from side to side, and her elytra flared open. She flew up and landed on top of a pink cosmos, staring at him. She circled around the petals, which dipped under her weight, until she settled in the middle.
“Pink suits you,” he blurted out suddenly, and he felt a blush appearing on his face. “I m-mean it looks really nice with your red. You can keep the flower if you want, this garden was made with you in mind after all and–“
He fumbled, reaching for the scissors he used as garden clippers, and clipped the cosmos stem. He lifted the flower up, and found himself stuttering for words with her so close. He mentally face palmed, he was never like this around her when he was transformed! Why was he like this now?
“W-wait, you can’t carry it, can you,” he stammered. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking–“
She flicked her elytra open, and he saw another one of her spots vanishing as she began growing once more. This time she was bigger than his fists, and her wings were making a clear buzzing sound as she hovered there in the air. It was a mere fraction of the size she could manage when facing an akuma, but yet still giant for a bug.
He held out the flower, and she wrapped her six legs around the stem. She took a moment to find her balance with it, but seemed to have no real struggle carrying it. He smiled as she watched him, and she gave him a nod of acknowledgement, before turning towards the window.
He stared after her as she flew away, disappearing out of sight as she flew up and over the mansion. Adrien couldn’t help but let out a sigh, grinning from ear to ear as he sank down onto his couch.
“Isn’t she amazing, Plagg?” He asked in a soft voice.
“She’s a good Ladybug,” Plagg acknowledged. “But you’re ridiculous.”
He just let out another sigh, his thoughts on Ladybug and the flower. Would she keep it after she detransformed? Would she mention to Chat that she had been given a flower? Okay, maybe that last one was wishful thinking, but so had been her showing up and she had! He found his mind constantly turning towards turning towards Ladybug and the cosmos, hoping at the very least it had made her happy in some way.
Yet strangely when he went to visit Marinette that night his mind wasn’t on flowers, and he didn’t even blink at the pink cosmos sitting in her room.
#lovesquarefluffweek2020#ladrien#ml ladrien#day 3: flowers#adrien agreste#ml adrien#ladybug#ml ladybug#marinette dupain-cheng#ml marinette#ml animal au#ml shapeshifting au#my fics#miraculous fanfic
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IMBOLC was so MAGICAL!! Oh my goodness!!
It's a bit of a long story and I don't want to leave out too many details but I am so glad it all turned out more than ok!! I did not have enough time to put everything together easily and I had to whip up a ritual last minute and I was staying at a coworker’s BOUGIE apartment that is BEAUTIFUL and Ideal for an Imbolc setting (the color scheme is like all white, gray and cream with TALL ceilings, Huge french windows, fluffy white carpets, fireplaces I could put white pillar candles in, long sheer white curtains, you get the point lol) but literally I had a witch gathering party at his place while he was away and I had to make it look like nothing. ever. happened.. the next morning.
I bought these string candle-lights which everyone was laughing at how in theme it was but I strung some across window sills and over the fireplace that I've stuffed white pillar candles in. I stuck tea lights everywhere and found some silvery tealights at a corner shop that were "spa scented" which sounds weird but!! They smelled fantastic and made the space feel calmer. I topped those with sage leaves. I used vanilla incense sticks and this other scent called 'Divine' (that stamford masala incense brand you might see at every spiritual shop) that really elevated the space and made it feel calm and angelic. The whole apartment felt very angelic, light, white and fluffy. On their large screen TV I made a visual playlist on youtube of timelapse videos of nature thawing into spring and frost melting or flowers sprouting from the ground. I played a lot of winter meditative tracts and purifying binural beats.
I pulled strings to get out of work early so I could run to my coworkers place, feed his cats, and get to cooking!! I made a spread of cheese, (mostly brie), coconut cheese, cheese infused crackers and poppyseed crackers, black sable grapes and blueberries that I sprinkled silver bonbons in.
I prepared 3 tonics as a welcome drink that my witch friends could choose from to what potion will aid them for the seeds they are sowing and the cycles to come. They were syrups that were agave based and infused with herbs overnight. There was one for clarity to know what steps to take to achieve goals and that was an infusion of sage, juniper berries and rosemary. There was one for inspiration and sudden muse or creativity to help complete projects and that one was an infusion of valerian root, chamomile, blue poppyseeds and caraway seeds. (Seeds were also symbolic in this one lol), then lastly there was one for inner fire and a wake-up call to get the drive going to get tasks done. That was a black breakfast tea leaf with a sprinkle of pepper in it. They were mixed with Gin (gin being a juniper infusion actually has an interesting history with being used as a cleanser and medicine though its obviously not used that way anymore) and tonic so they were all really herbal and refreshing (non-alcoholic drinks were just gin-free) and they all had a pretty light golden clear color. The clarity one was the most popular though I wish I drank some of the wake-up call one myself.
For food I made baked macaroni and cheese with mozzarella, sharp cheddar, brie, sweet sauteed white onions, black pepper and truffle oil. The plant-based option was stuffed cabbage rolls made with this BEAUTIFUL cabbage I had no idea existed (it caught my eye in the store) called sweetheart cabbage. It was snow-white colored and each large leaf was somewhat heart-shaped. I stuffed it with a sauteed combo of white sweet onions, white mushrooms, chopped parsnips, cauliflower rice and coconut cheese. Lastly I made a salad of chopped fennel and the smaller leaves of the sweet heart cabbage and raw parsnips.
The whole table's food had a white and beige theme lol. We all caught up about our lives and ate food and coo-ed over the cats. When everyone arrived we got to the ritual which I dressed his coffee table in different tea lights and bigger candles. Since I am WIZENED from many previous disasters with candles on tables and witch shenanigans, I put SEVERAL covers on his glass coffee table which consisted of 1- bamboo mats, 2- a white blanket as table cloth (mostly for aesthetic) 3- a coat of aluminum foil 4- 2 layers of cream table cloths. Just to ensure nothing could damage his table.
I am not the biggest fan of leading ritual cause it feels uncomfortable to me to 'lead' everyone's energy but its nice cause this is the third sabbat in a row I've hosted and I guess my friends get the gist now so they all kind of contribute their own parts to it which is.. WHAT I WANTED IN THE FIRST PLACE lol. I take initiative to host sabbats or gatherings or create a community so sometimes people think I am a leader cause I am initiating something but honestly I just want to hold space for others. Anyway the ritual started off with us cleansing baggage from our previous cycle so we can move into the next one purified. I had a juniper bundle I bought in glastonbury that I smoke cleansed everyone with.
Then we spoke about what Imbolc meant for us and how its also reflective on the cycle of life and death when the spirit enters the womb and how seeds of life and hope are stirring. I asked them each to take a tea light and visualize it as a goal or project they wanted to accomplish for this year and to dress it in herbs and oils. I had sage for clarity, rosemary for abundance, blue poppy seeds for growth and inspiration, tea tree oil for protection etc and they could carve in symbols to their candle or whatever. When they were working on that I read everyone's spirit's incarnation crosses from their human design since I knew everyone's birth time lol. The incarnation cross uses some astrology to take into consideration the position of the planets during your third trimester when it’s believed that the spirit enters the body in the womb. It’s to illuminate what your spirit’s intention in this incarnation seeks to fulfill.
Before we lit the candle my best witch friend took us on this AMAZING guided mediation that was so creative and visual and wonderful. We grounded ourselves but she took us on this story-telling guided meditation journey of us being deep in the earth and smelling the damp soil but having our goal be this light or seed within us that grows and expands until it pushes us up and out through the soil into the wintery forest air. I really felt like some reborn forest faerie sprite after that like she should record meditation podcasts.
We then lit our candles and we used the flame to light the biggest pillar candle as our combined hope and it lit ABLAZED. One of my friends couldn't get her candle to light and we did divination for her to find out what was blocking her and did a road opening spell for her so that she could overcome the obstacles.
After we wanted to do some candle scrying so another friend who does these amazing sound healing ceremonies (I went to glastonbury with her) lead the candle scrying and Y'all.. it was INSANE Like none of us were READY for the fucking adventure.. Basically we thought we'd all be staring into a candle in a trance quietly but it literally felt like something took hold of her like a greater spirit used her as a vessel and it was incredible. She told us all to hold hands and we closed our eyes and did some breathing. We all had to pulse each others hands and visualize a white thread locking us together for protection and creating a circle. She then called on to our higher guides to protect us and create this link to our higher spirits to open a channel so that we may see and allow the fire to guide us. She then was speaking so fast but also with such precision on how the light is opening a door and whatever we will see will help us unlock our true potential and see how we are the light etc for what felt like 6 minutes nonstop and it was so hard to stay on cause I had the WORST PAIN come up in the center of my back where my heart was and I was feeling like it was the culmination of energy being blocked (I have been doing sound healing there to help my heart energy but its been a rough journey), and the fire just felt like it could not channel through me cause of that blockage, but though the knot still hurts even as I type this, I could not break the circle lol. My best friend to my right was staring so intently I knew she was off like astral projecting into this fire, and as I would catch glimpses of others around me everyone was just like.. ON a Journey. I felt like it was like that scene in Harry Potter when they took the port key like we were all locked in and spiraling through time and space and I just had to wait until it was done. I looked at my friend to my right and she was beaming with TEARS covering her face, and my other friends looked windswept for some reason?? We were all like goddamn.. Everyone had Some Shit they've seen in the fire. Even if some of us didn't see something we saw a lot of colors which I mostly saw since I was really focused on the pain in my back. My friend leading the scrying said that the back area I pointed out was a channel that was blocked and is connected to my throat energy so once I fix that it can be aligned/opened but its like.. healing is so hard guys haha.
Anyway we grounded ourselves after the ritual with dessert! :) There was cheesecake (of course) I decorated with white chocolate star sprinkles and the same silver bonbon sprinkles and pavlova that could be topped with blueberries. I also had a cookie spread of butter cookies, white chocolate chip sugar cookies and white chocolate twix bars. The rest were mostly vegan desserts which were lovely. I bought coconut rice pudding but my other friends got vanilla cupcakes with thick white vegan buttercream, there was vanilla soy icecream that was really creamy and light and my aries witch friend I went to Berlin with made home made vegan tiramisu which was fantastic! She also bought red wine.
We spent the rest of the evening chatting, playing with the cats and laughing about whatever, my Aries witch friend was upset I made the dresscode all-white but she was wearing her 'artist' shirt she does painting in so she didn't care that she got tiramisu ALL OVER IT lol. (which we pointed out that no one else had stains on their white outfits but I mean she's an Aries what do you expect), and when we were all getting drunk and sleepy I asked my best witch friend if she wanted to tell a story and Oh My God she fucking DELIVERED
Basically she took us on this adventure retelling the story of Baba Yaga cause it was a tale that does also have to do with crone passing power to a maiden and a cycle re-continuing. Plus it's a midwinter tale involving fire and illumination. Anyway I used to think about how sad it was that back in the day people didn't have movies and had to like tell stories and shit but she was so good at telling this story I was like damn I get it now why people just used to sit around and tell stories together cause this shit is lit.
Before everyone left I forced people to take home food (I mean I had to get rid of all evidence of anything happening in my coworkers house) and I made everyone white paper lanterns with goodies inside and I stuck an electric tealight in it so it glows. I put a bathbomb in there, white chocolate, mint crumbles, buttermints for the non-vegans and tiny spell-jars filled with salt flakes.
When I was finally alone and had to do cleanup it took me nearly three hours but I was also drunk at that point lol. I now have left-over mac and cheese for days but gladly my aries witch friend is vegan and took the cabbage rolls with her and everyone helped take everything else.The cleaner came in the morning and essentially all evidence of anything ever occurring in that apartment was cleansed away...
I hope everyone else had a fantastic Imbolc!! It was on such a perfect moon phase too since it's the first quarter moon!!
#imbolc#personal#the story is long but filled with details#it was a magical night#all I could have ever wanted
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Well-Seasoned
AO3 | FFdotnet
Aang and seasonings throughout the seasons of the show as the seasons pass.
Written for Aang Week 2017. Prompt - Seasons.
Fandom: Avatar: The Last Airbender Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Aang & the Gaang, Aang & Katara, Aang & Zuko Characters: Aang, Katara, Sokka, Toph, Zuko, Suki, Mai, Ty Lee, Iroh, The Gaang Additional Tags: Cooking, Friendship, Cultural Differences
Hey guys! Aang week is almost over, and it’s been a blast! If you’ve been enjoying my fics feel free to follow me - this is an Avatarverse blog and I do write fanfic often enough that I’d say I’m an active writer. Also feel free to check out my AO3, I’ve got more stories there, too.
“What’s that?” Aang asked, watching Katara rub the fish Sokka had caught with some sort of green powder.
“Qanik,” she said, her smile bittersweet. “It’s a seaweed - we dry it out and grind it up into powder to use as seasoning. But it’s really hard to make - you can only harvest qanik two months out of the year, and since half the tribe left to fight we haven’t been able to harvest a lot.” She flipped the fish over and started rubbing the powder on its other side. “I found a jar of it with the stuff Gran-Gran packed for us. I guess she wanted us to taste a bit of home.”
The last of the Water Tribe food packed by Gran-Gran had run out half a week ago. They still had plenty of supplies thanks to the good people of Kyoshi Island, but Aang could tell his friends were starting to realize just how far from home they were traveling. Sokka was suspicious of every unfamiliar vegetable, and Katara was taking rice cooking as a personal challenge.
Aang gave her an encouraging smile. “That was really thoughtful of her. Spices don’t go bad like other food - you can probably make it last until we get to the North Pole!”
“I hope so,” Katara said. “And I hope they have qanik, too. Or something like it.”
“What’s it taste like?” Aang asked.
“Like a gentle slap of sea on your food.” She finished with the fish and regarded the spice jar. “Would you like to try some?”
“I’d love to! I’ve tried Earth Kingdom and Fire Nation spices, don’t think I’ve had any Water Tribe kinds before.”
“I’ll add it to your rice,” Katara said, and she shot a glower at simmering the cooking pot. “I’m pretty sure I managed to not undercook it this time. Or overcook it.”
“Eighth time’s the charm,” Aang grinned. “Are you sure you don’t want me to help - ”
“No. I’ve got this.”
Or she was getting it, at least. The rice was only a little overcooked. But the qanik made up for it.
“Guess who splurged at the market!” Sokka crowed as he and Toph came back to their camp, arms laden with supplies.
“I’m guessing you guys,” Aang said from where he was sitting very still on the ground. “I’m getting better at this earth sense thing. I actually felt you guys walking before I saw you!”
“Great job, Twinkletoes. Maybe in a few decades you’ll manage to get the drop on me!”
“Splurged?!” Katara repeated, looking up from the cooking pot to shoot them an accusing look. “Sokka, we’ve been over this - we can’t go wasting our money!”
“Relax, Sugar Queen, it’s my money,” Toph said. “I grabbed some before I left my parents’ house. Anyway, here.” She held out a small bottle filled with reddish-brown powder. “I thought your cooking could use a boost.”
“If we were in the South Pole my cooking would be perfect,” Katara huffed.
“Aw, I think you’ve been doing great cooking on the road,” Aang said, getting up and stepping toward Toph.
“I like your cooking,” Sokka said.
“You’ll eat anything,” Katara shot back.
Aang took the bottle Toph was still holding out. “Hey, this is five-spice!”
“What’s five-spice?” Sokka asked.
Toph’s eyes widened. “Seriously? You guys have trekked across the Earth Kingdom twice and you don’t know what five-spice is?”
“Most of that time was spent avoiding fireballs!”
“I’m gonna go out on a limb and assume it’s a blend of five spices,” Katara said.
“Brilliant deduction, Sweetness.”
“Star anise, cloves, cinnamon, pepper, and fennel seeds,” Aang said absently, turning the bottle over in his hands. “It’s good.”
“I figured dinner could use some more flavors.”
Katara took the bottle from Aang’s hand, opened it, and took a sniff. Her eyes lit up. “Oh! I think we’ve had this before in some villages, I just never thought to ask what it was. It’s good!”
“Glad you agree with me,” Toph said with a wave of her hand. “Can you add it to tonight’s dinner? I’m blind, I’d like to enjoy my other senses as much as I can.”
“Aang,” Zuko said, “you do know what that is, right?”
“Sure I do,” Aang grinned. “It’s a seven-pot pepper.”
“And do you know what that is?”
“The hottest pepper in the world.”
“And what are you planning to do with it?”
Aang grinned. “Eat it!”
Zuko was starting to severely regret bringing them all to the Ember Island house. He’d completely forgotten about his mother’s prized pepper garden, which was apparently still growing taste bud-murdering fruit after six years of abandonment. “Are you sure you want to do that?”
“Sure I’m sure! Kuzon, Bumi, and I challenged each other to eat one of these once. We wound up crying on the floor while Monk Gyatso nearly passed out laughing. It was great.”
“...Okay then. So long as you know what you’re getting into.” He looked from Aang to Sokka. “Do you know what you’re getting into?”
“I’ve been eating your spicy food since we hijacked a Fire Navy ship,” Sokka said, turning the pepper in his fingers by the stem. “I’m prepared for this!”
Zuko looked to Katara, Toph, Suki, and the peppers they held. “Are you guys sure you want to do this?”
“You only live once,” Toph said, sniffing the pepper in her hand.
“C’mon, Zuko,” Suki grinned, holding out another pepper. “It’s a team-building exercise!”
“You can’t come up with any better team-building exercises?”
“Our original team-building exercises involved whooping your butt,” Katara pointed out.
“Apparently they still do,” Zuko muttered, taking the pepper from Suki. He took a moment to contemplate it, and recalled fond memories of his mother and cousin cry-laughing on the ground as they’d eaten these things while a horrified Ozai watched. “Why do all team-building exercises have to hurt?”
“Okay guys!” Aang said. “We’ve got jugs of water for when we need them! Let’s do it!”
They all bit into their peppers.
“MY MOUTH IS ON FIRE!” Suki shrieked.
“THIS IS TERRIBLE! I THINK I LOVE IT!” Toph shouted.
“WHY DID I DO THIS WHY WHY WHY??”
“WATER! WHERE’S THE WATER?!”
By the end they were all laid out in the courtyard, watched by a worried Appa and Momo, who were very confused as to why their humans had gone and bit into what obviously smelled like torture.
“Katara,” Sokka moaned, “Katara my tongue needs healing.”
“M’healin’ m’own tongue firs’!”
Aang was curled into the fetal position beside Zuko, giggling through his tears. “Ohhhhhhh that was just as bad as I remembered it.”
“Why did my mother grow this monster?” Zuko panted, staring up at the clouds. The cool air on his tongue helped a bit.
“Because she had good taste?”
“I’m starting to think she had no sense of taste.”
Aang laughed. “C’mon Zuko, it’s the hottest pepper in the world! Of course she’d want it in her garden!”
Zuko slowly blinked up at the sky and turned to look at Aang. “The seven-pot pepper isn’t the hottest pepper in the world.”
“Yeah it is! It’s the - it’s - it’s been a hundred years, oh, don’t tell me…”
Zuko managed to twist his tortured mouth into a grin. “A while back, Komodo Island bred a new strain of pepper. They call it the Komodo Dragon.”
“Oh, spirits,” Aang said, and he pushed himself up from the ground and peered towards the path that led back towards the pepper garden. “Did your mom plant that one too?”
One autumn evening, shortly after arriving back in Ba Sing Se after a sojourn to the Eastern Air Temple, Aang insisted on overseeing dinner. One of the packs on Appa’s saddle was bulging with odd vegetables and plump fruits that Aang handled with a bittersweet smile. Sokka resigned himself to a meal without meat, but the promise of a traditional Air Nomad fruit pie, baked to Monk Gyatso’s exacting standards and not meant to be thrown at anybody, more than made up for it.
“I want to try and find more sky bison,” Aang said as he took over the Jasmine Dragon’s kitchen. “Next time I have time to go off to the mountains, I’m gonna go looking.”
“You really think you’ll find some?” Katara asked, laying out cooking utensils. Beside her, Mai was eyeing Iroh’s kitchen knives judgmentally.
“I’m sure there’s more out there. There were always wild herds,” Aang said. “And just because people say something’s extinct, it doesn’t mean it is.” He shot a pointed look at Zuko, who answered with a wry smile, and Iroh, who smirked into his teacup. “Anyway,” he said, turning back to the onion-like plant in his hand. “Jimbu always tastes better when you fry it in ghee.”
“What’s ghee?” Toph asked. She was sitting beside Iroh, teacup in hand.
“A special kind of butter. We made it from bison milk.”
“Aang, why is there a rock in with all the food?” Suki asked from where she and Ty Lee were sorting out the contents of the saddlebag.
“A rock?” Toph repeated. “What kind of rock?”
“It’s pink!” Ty Lee grinned. “It’s so pretty! I love it!”
“Rose quartz?” Toph surmised. “Twinkletoes, I know you said you need to feel the earth, that doesn’t mean you need to eat it!”
Aang laughed. “It’s not quartz, it’s salt,” he said, taking the rock from Suki. A bit of earthbending and part of it crumbled into tiny pieces in his hand. He handed the rest over to Toph.
“Salt?” Katara asked. She and Sokka were frowning at the rock in Toph’s hands.
So was Zuko. “That doesn’t look like salt.”
Aang laughed. “Not everyone gets their salt from the sea, guys! We used to mine it out of the mountains.”
“Pink salt!” Ty Lee looked absolutely delighted.
“We’ve got salt mines in the Earth Kingdom,” Toph said, turning the rock over in her hands before handing it back to Aang. “I’ve never been too clear on colors, but from what I understand it’s not usually pink. Anything special about pink salt, Twinkletoes?”
Aang shrugged. “I don’t think so. It’s just...pink.”
“Being pink is enough to make anything special,” Ty Lee said.
“You’re special enough,” Mai muttered, and Ty Lee beamed.
“It’s special to Aang,” Katara said, and she looked at the pile of jimbu sitting on the counter. “So do we cut this or is there some other way to prepare it?”
“We used to dry it to use all year round,” Aang said. “But you can use it fresh, too. Let’s save the leaves and chop up the rest. We can dry the leaves out and fry them in butter later. It won’t be ghee, but it’ll still be good.”
“Doesn’t sound hard,” Katara said, handing Aang a knife.
“No harder than rice,” Aang grinned.
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The first case of Corona virus has been confirmed on Long Island. There is so much information about what the virus is and what symptoms to look out for at The World Health Organization and The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) so educate yourself on the ins and outs of the virus if you’re not aware yet. There are a few things I would like to share with you. 1. I wanted to make you aware of what Revolution has been doing to keep our staff and practitioners safe since Corona virus landed in the US and what we will continue to do moving forward to keep you in your yoga practice safely during this stressful time. 2. I wanted to share some Ayurvedic wisdom in regard to this particular virus and offer some information on what is recommended by the CDC, Yoga Alliance and our insurance company if it can help our beloved community at all. 3. Lastly, even if the whole state is put under quarantine we have creative plans in place to make sure your yoga practice is not interrupted at any time. What we are doing inside the studio Surfaces Twice daily all surfaces and items commonly touched are disinfected with cleaners proven to kill coronavirus that pose no threat to our students with chemical sensitivities. Staff follow a stringent list so that nothing is forgotten and everything is cleaned uniformly each time. Air We use an ancient Ayurvedic Technique to disinfect all the air throughout the studio in the evening, daily. Bowing Policy We all love each other to the moon and back and everyone in our community tends to be very affectionate. With that being said let us all shift how we show affection to one another for the time being. There will be a policy of instead of hugging, kissing, shaking hands we all bow to one another. In Vedic tradition the head is the highest part of the body and to lower that to another person is a sign of great admiration and respect. Hands in prayer at heart center signifies Namaste which means I cherish and honor the pure, divine consciousness in you which is the same consciousness in me. It's simply bringing us back to the way things used to be done. Practice at home Policy We ask that if you have a cough, cold, or fever before coming back to the studio wait two weeks and/or undergo testing for coronavirus before coming in. We will send you an at home sick day yoga video if you want to keep up with your practice while feeling unwell. We have students in our population healing from cancer, autoimmune and more and we need to protect the community as a whole by being conscientious of one another. This also applies to people who have travelled to other affected countries within the past two weeks. Hands on Adjustments Policy To protect the teachers and students at the studio we will suspend all hands on adjustments until the virus is under control in New York. Disinfect your hands within the studio As of Monday March 9 we will have alcohol based hand sanitizer at the front desk for use during sign in and in all the bathrooms. Wash hands, bring fresh clothing to practice in and we should all be safe within the space we love so dearly. Mat Rentals and Props Mats rentals will now be kept behind the front desk. Please return to the front desk staff when finished so mats can undergo a deep disinfecting treatment. Props like blocks at the studio will all be disinfected twice daily and blankets will be cleaned frequently. That being said it can’t hurt to bring your own blanket to place over bolsters or use in your practice. We sell them in our shoppe up front. What you can do inside your body I wanted to share some ancient wisdom. I’ve put in orders to stock the shoppe with all you need to keep your at home apothecary ready to go just in case you need it. If we all take part in getting our bodies to their healthiest state we protect not only ourselves but others as well. Obviously this is not meant to replace the recommendations of your doctor. Always check with your doctor before taking herbs. Ayurvedic Ojas The Best thing you can do for yourself is boost your immune system. Ojas means a person’s inner glow which comes from a robust immune system. To get into that space it is helpful to adjust your diet (eat sattvic food and drink- see images below) and lifestyle to nourish all the tissues. Eat Sattvic Foods Sattvic means balanced, Life giving and Ojas Giving-
Food Should Be: Clean, Pure- Chemical FreeNatural Processed Free Vital, Energy giving, Fresh Be Conscious- Stay Present and lovingly aware while cooking Foods prepared wisely Foods for Consitution Eat only when Hungry Leave 1/4 Stomach Empty Avoid Excess sour, salt, bitter, oil, spice Avoid Unripe Vegetables, Fermented, Leftovers, alcohol and drugs Raw Cold Pressed Olive, Red Palm, Sesame, Flax Oil All Fruits Milk from loved pastured cows only after baby has eaten Yogurt and Cheese Made the Same Day Ghee and Cooked Whole Milk All vegetables excluding fungi, nightshades and alliums Sprouted and roasted whole grains Mung Beans Honey & Jaggery Basil, Corriander, Cardamom, Cinnamon, Cumin, Fennel, Fenugreek, Ginger, Turmeric, Soma Salt Always Activate Nuts in Water Overnight Hemp Seeds Coconut Pine Nutes Walnuts Sesame Seeds Pumpkin Seeds Flax Seeds
Get Proper Rest Ayurveda teaches to wake before the sunrise each morning (usually around 6a) and be in bed before 9:30p. Honor darkness an hour before bedtime to help melatonin naturally rise and avoid using electronics with artificial light during wind down time. If you have trouble falling asleep lay down in bed and listen to yoga nidra recordings to help you fall asleep. Proper rest means the body can repair itself and the immune system can be healthy. Follow a Predictable Eating Rhythm The largest meal at noon, the smallest lightest meal at night before 7p and a medium sized breakfast around 7:30a. Two snacks if still hungry during the day. Follow proper combinations of foods. Simple ways to do this- eat fruit alone, don’t combine dairy with fruit or meat. Practice Yoga and Meditation Daily This helps to keep the channels clear and healthy and reduce stress that can inhibit the immune system’s response. Proper Ayurvedic Cleanliness Protocols Oiling Oil inside the ears and nostrils (we sell nasya and ear oil in the shoppe) this will help create a barrier to viruses getting in. Massage the whole body before taking a shower. This boosts the immune system and keeps the skin healthy. They say the oil helps to bar anything bad from getting in. We carry ayurvedic daily massage oil which is good for all constitutions but also a simple coconut oil massage will suffice! Oil pull as well with coconut oil before brushing teeth. Shoes Take off your shoes in your house and the studio. We drag innumerable viruses into our houses. Go barefoot or keep house slippers by the door so you can swap into them. Wash your hands As soon as you get home before touching anything. Wash again before you eat your food, or before washing your face/ applying product. Try not to touch your eyes nose or mouth before washing hands as this is how disease most quickly enters. This isn’t Ayurvedic but I’m considering the cell phone an extension of my hands while I’m out with it during the day. Keeping rubbing alcohol and cotton balls near the sink to wipe down the phone upon arriving home can’t hurt! Cover your Mouth Avoid the spread of disease by covering your mouth with your inner arm when you cough or sneeze. Antivirals to take Proactively - Chyavanprash is an effective “ayurvedic vitamin” that is incredible for the immune system and high in natural vitamin C. It’s great to take daily. If you are fire constitution taking with cow’s or coconut milk drink beside it will help to cool its heating qualities. - Zinc Bhasma- this is a special formulation that is more easily absorbed than regular zinc supplements. - Turmeric should be a part of your every day diet or taken as a supplement. Indian Bay Leaf is a potent antiviral that can be thrown into soups, stews and even made a tea of. Herbs that Help Manage Symptoms if you Catch the Virus to Have on Hand - Dashamoola will help open the lungs making it easier to breath, cut out congestion, and reduce fever quickly - Shatavari and Amalaki will act quickly on reducing fever - Ginger and Turmeric will help to decrease inflammation and counteract the effects of the virus - Cinquefoil is proven in studies to stop the viral replication of corona viruses. - Take only after symptoms begin - Eucalyptus is a bronchodilator that can be hung in the shower and help to open lungs quickly. Preparing for a Quarantine There is no expectation that any of us will have to be in quarantine but many countries struggling with this virus have instituted this. Again I’ll reiterate your practice at Revolution Yoga will not be affected by this if it happens we have really great contingency plans in place for our members and those who want to continue to “drop in” to classes. - Make sure your kitchen is stocked with the herbs you need. - Rice, mung beans and ghee with turmeric and dried cilantro can keep you healthy and well for a long time so have these on hand in bulk. - Dried beans, grains, dehydrated vegetables can all be rehydrated and made into soups. Gourds, root veggies, apples all have a long shelf life in the fridge. - Whatever you use often try to have more of it in the house. - We still have lots of seeds in stock if you want to get your garden going for ensured source of healthy fresh veggies you can pick right in your backyard. Sending you all Love and Gratitude and Good Health! Feel free to share with friends and family! Peace and Love, Amanda DiGiovanna and the good folks at Revolution Yoga
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Something’s Gotta Give. ( Taehyung/Oc)
Chapter 3
“Tae?” I said groggily, lightly reaching out to prod the prone figure on the carpet, still wearing his jacket and suit and curled on the floor , sleeping fitfully. I tried again and he didn’t move. I picked up the two bottles of vodka and grimaced. He was going to feel like hell when he got up.
Sighing, i moved to the kitchen and poured myself a glass of water before setting the kettle to boil. Taehyung had the tolerance of a fifteen year old. I could imagine how he would feel when he woke up. I scratched at the linoleum surface of the counter, trying to dredge up some anger , some annoyance.
But I was drained.
I didn’t hate him. I couldn’t hate him. Yes, he did something awful. Yes, he betrayed me. But, he was still Taehyung.
my Taehyung. I couldn’t hate him.
But i wasn’t an idiot. I would move out. My studio apartment from when i was in college was in Gangnam. Jung Kook crashed there when he wanted some time to himself but i knew he was staying with Yoongi at his penthouse. I would give him a call and then move there , hopefully later in the day. I couldn’t got to my brother or my parents.
They wouldn’t understand.
I grabbed some fennel seeds, sliced up a small ginger root and minced it, before adding a little thyme into the water as well. I let the tea diffuse and sat down on the table, staring into the wall.
“My mariage is over.” I said softly.
The words were oddly loud in the peaceful kitchen.
“Kim Taehyung and i are over. “ I said a bit louder.
It didn’t feel anymore realer. But then, over the past few months, one part of me had known that I was going to end up like this, right? I knew it. Taehyung had been distant, indifferent and hurtful. He had been falling out of love with me.
But falling out of love is ... okay. I could deal with it.
Falling in love with another woman?
Not so much.
“Rae Mi?” His voice startled me badly, and I nearly knocked the glass of water over as I jumped. He was standing in the doorway, looking like hell. I gripped the table to stop myself from rushing over and supporting his swaying frame. The need to touch him was so strong that i wanted to cry. Taehyung had been the most physically affectionate person in the world and as his wife I had been the recipient of nearly 90 % of that affection : the cuddles, the hugs, the impromptu bridal-carries, the inpomptu piggy backing.
“ Sit down. i made tea,.” I said dully.
He groaned and moved to the chair opposite me, rubbing his eyes with the heel of his palms. I stared at him, fondness and sadness and disappointment blooming inside me like a poisonous weed.
What a waste. We could have had it all. We could have been forever. What an utter waste of so many years of love.
“Rae, please... Can we just...” He began, reaching out, but i pulled my hand away.
“I just... Why?” I said softly. I didn’t want to yell.
He gave me a long, miserable look.
“I ... don’t know.” He whispered finally.
I stared at him, feeling frustrated and confused.
“Rae mi, I’ve been so tired these few months , i signed that stupid contract which meant that I couldn’t even come home when i wanted to , and I couldn’t talk to the hyungdeul or even you because i was just so busy! “
I fought the urge to whimper.
“Okay. That’s fine. But Tae, why didn’t you just talk to me? If you wanted out, i would have given you a divorce ! i would have moved out!” I said miserably.
His eyes went wide at that,
“No! That’s not.. That’s not what i want. I don’t want you to leave Rae mi! “
“Of course you don’t. But then, I’m not the one who left, remember? You left... last night when i begged you to stay. And a countless more times before that. “ I pointed out.
He bit his lips.
“Give me one chance. I swear I’ll make...”
“Don’t say it. Don’t you dare say you’ll make it up to me , because there is nothing in the world you can do to make it up to me!” I felt the first sting of tears and tried to get my self under control.
“I’m sorry.” He said and I stood up slowly, grabbing the fine-bone china cps. We’d bought it on our trip to Macau, in a quaint little antique shop, right outside our hotel room. i traced the pretty pink and blue patters on the rim and sighed.
“Stop being sorry. You don’t have to be sorry .” I said finally. “ I mean, yes, you should be sorry for chaeting on me but I won’t blame you for wanting her. She’s ... well she’s Lalisa Manoban. How could I ever compete?” I said dejectedly, pouring the tea into the cup carefully.
Taehyung made a noise of distress and stood up, swaying a bit as he came closer, holding a hand out.
“She doesn’t mean anything to me. She’s just... i don’t even know what she is. i don’t even care... Rae Mi, i know I messed up real bad, but please... please don’t throw this away... Don’t throw away what we have, baby...”
I stared at him in disbelief.
“You did the throwing away. “ I snapped. “ I’m not the one who..”
“I begged you to come with me! I asked you to come with me to Hong kong!!” He shouted.
I froze.
“What?! Are you insane.... Your fans hate me! Every single one of them hates me , you know that!” I hissed. “ Why would i come there ?!”
“See! That’s it,... You care so much about what the fans feel but you don’t care what i feel... i was so fucking lonely and depressed and i just... i just wanted to be able to hold you at the end of the day! And you straight up refused to come with me. You didn’t even ask why. you didn’t even ask me what was bothering me!” He hissed.
I felt myself choke on my own disbelief.
“Are you fucking kidding me! Anytime I did, you kept telling me not to worry and that this was your job !! You did it so many times that i gave up!”
“So, you admit it , then.. You gave up on us, before i cheated on you...”
“Oh, my God, Taehyung are you listening to yourself, right now?!”
“I’m sorry okay?! i fucked up with Lisa.. i don’t.. I don’t even know how that happened... She called me to have a drink and we were talking about the movie and just... i got drunk . I don’t even remember touching her. i don’t even know if something happened or not! But I do know thatyou’ve been pushing me away...”
“I’m pushing you away? When did i ever..You , you were the one who brought her to our home! And then you left with her! You left me at home and went with her!! .”
“Because i found those pills in the bathroom counter!! ” He yelled.
i froze.
“Taehyung...”
“i found those fucking birth control pills in your bathroom , yesterday okay?? That was why i had to get out of the house!! that was why i fucking went with that woman and got fucking drunk because i found out that my wife is on birth control, while here i am, praying every second of everyday that god would just grant me one miracle.... That i’d be able to hold my baby...!! How long have you been on those, huh? ! when were you even planning to tell me about those!!” He whispered.
I felt my entire body go ice cold. Oh God, i had left them on the counter. Shit. Shit. Shit.
“I... I just... “
“How long..? Just telkl me how long, that’s all i want to hear”
i took a deep breath
“Two years.” I said finally.
He laughed.��
“Great. That’s just so fucking great...”
i felt my entire body seize up in protest.
“But I stopped three months ago!!! Taehyung, we’d been trying for six years and i was just so frustrated!! i was so scared and i just wanted to .”
I bit my lips, not sure how to explain it.
TAehyung growled low.
“ Wanted to what? Take away even the little chance that we did have?!! Yeah, we’ve been trying for years....So what? I don’t mind trying for another decade! I .. Want us to have a kid. I want a child and i know, deep down that we’re meant to have one! I just don’t know why you decided to just stop trying without even talking to me about it. That isn’t a breach of trust?! Do you have any idea how i felt, seeing those damn pills!” He shouted.
“So you went out an banged the first girl you met! That makes sense! That makes it all okay!! Doesn’t it?? ”
“I went out because i was afraid , i would fucking lose it! That i’d yel;l at you or God forbid break something! i left because i wanted to get my head on straight.. But you know what’s funny? even when i was leaving, i saw you standing there looking so lost and I wanted to make it better....” He shook his head.
I bit my lips.
“I... Ever since you started doing that movie, you’ve been distant. You were attarcted to her, don’t deny it!”
“Are you insane? If i was attractyed to her and if i wanted her, why would i ask you to come along with me? And i did! ... I asked you to come with me. I hoped that we could talk it out. That we could at least consider adoption. But all you kept saying was ‘ your career is important. You need to concentrate on your work.’....”
“Because, I knew how important it was to you!! You worked so hard on that movie, i didn’t want you to be stressed out because of me as well!”
“And who the hell are you to decide that, huh? You get to choose when I should come to you? You get to decide when I should stay away?! It doesn’t matter what i want?”
I clenched my fists.
“Don’t try to turn this on me.” I whispered.
“Turn what? The blame? I’m not. I’m not saying that i cheated because of what you did. I’m saying that, I felt cheated on as well, when i saw those pills. “
I laughed in disbelief.
“Are you saying it’s the same thing? Me taking pills and you cheating on me ?!”
“No! I’m saying that at least i didn’t know what i was doing. I didn’t mean to have one to many drinks yesterday. i fully meant to come back home to you. But i hadn’t slept in eighteen fucking hours and I was so fucking tired. And then i saw those damn pils and i made a mistake? I should have had my head on staright but i was hurt and I was lonely and she was there.. she was just there ... when i needed someone...”
I stared at him, feeling miserable.
“Taehyung, i don’t want to fight. i think.. We need a break. You and i... we need to get our head on straight before we just say stuff that’s going to make everything worse. ”
He didn’t respond.
“Let’s just take a break.” I said again.
“You want to leave me then?” He said sulkily.
“Not.. leave. I don’t know.. i just.. we’ve known each other and loved each other for eight years Taehyung !! After eight years it’s not that simple! i can’t just up and leave you and i can’t just forgive you either and i know that you’re hurt about the pills and i know that i shouldn’t have done that but.. I just... I wanted to stop being so disappointed , every monthh ... i wanted to move on and accept that maybe we weren’t meant to have kids and i was scared that you wouldn’t agree...”
“So you went and did it anyway...”
“Shut up and hear me out! I was scared and I was lonely and i made a mistake. and i’m going to ... give you the benefit of the doubt about what happened last night. But it still doesn’t change the fact that I’m hurt. I need time. And I think so do you. Let’s just take a break from each other.”
He sighed.
“You’re right. Just.. I don’t want us to end like this.i don’t want us to end , period. i’m not ready for that. ” He said fists clenching.
I softened.
“we’re not ending. It’s just a phase. We’ll work it out. “ I said, the words fake and meaningless.
“I’ll move out then...” He began
“No! i.. my studio is still free . I think i want to paint a bit more. I’d like to go back there.” I said.
He sighed and nodded.
“So, that’s it then?”
“Let’s not make this more difficult. I’ll pack and be gone by the end of the day. if you could just... I don’t know.. go somewhere else...”
“Fine. Yeah, i understand. Okay. That’s fine. i’ll do that...”
“Thank you. And the tea is getting cold. You should have some, for your hangover. I’ve left it on the top shelf. It’s ginger, thyme , fennel .”
He smiled faintly.
“I can’t believe I’m letting you walk out like this...”
I ducked my head.
“i’m really happy that you are. “
“i may change my mind and come drag you back home. Just fair warning.” He said softly and I relaxed a little, feeling oddly nostalgic at the friendly banter.
We used to be best friends, I thought miserably. More than lovers, we were best friends. Our relationship was never about sex or romance or anything . it was about support and trust and just accepting each other the way we were.
“You still are...” He said suddenly, as though reading my mind.
“what?”
“My best friend. Always.”
“ To the moon and back?? ” i whispered, the forgotten phrase slipping out. His gaze softened and he smiled faintly.
“To the moon and back.” He moved closer and gave me a gentle hug . The scent of him was ... home.
Taehyung would always be home. I pulled away and sighed, watching him as he carefully took a sip of the tea and then downed it in one shot. He then picked up his jacket, gave me one last look of regret and walked out. I sagged against the table after the door shut behind him.
Home wasn’t home without Taehyung. So it wasn’t even difficult, packing my stuff and leaving our condo.
AUTHOR’S NOTE : Maybe one day i’ll let my characters be happy for once.. Ugh. Sorry.. Let me know what you think though!!
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Earth Mama Angel Baby® +Whoa, Wait. Walmart?
Disclaimer : We were provided this product by Earth Mama Angel Baby® and compensated to promote said product. Pinky promise that the opinions here are truthful and our very own. In fact, we only accept partnerships with companies whose products we like and use. Whoa, wait. Walmart? is in no way responsible for quality of, or your satisfaction with, any products viewed on our blog. Any product links provided on our blog are affiliate links, and we receive commission when a reader makes a purchase from a link. Have questions? Ask us in the comments over on Instagram! (kissy face emoji!)
Where our new mamas at? Hey ladies! Let’s pretend we are having a girls night IN complete with fun drinks and slumber party snacks. Cheese dip, I’m talking bout you! (Gentleman, I suggest you sit this one out.)
Subject matter? Babies! Carrying ‘em, birthing 'em, feeding them, and adoring them. My little lady baby is five months now so most of this is still fresh on my mind - especially the feeding part. Ah breast-feeding, the natural easy way to feed your baby right? Not for everyone! I know it is easy and natural for some people but goodness, not me. I have breast-fed all three of my babies but it was a struggle every single time. Have questions? Lay 'em on me! I’m happy to share more about it if you are interested. I’m no lactation consultant but one thing you’ll never hear me say is that it shouldn’t hurt. Well sometimes it does hurt. Guys, I’m five months in and sometimes it still hurts. That’s where my new friend Earth Mama® Nipple Butter comes in to play. I’ve been using it for a couple of weeks now and I wish I’d known about it sooner. I like it for many reasons one being that it is lanolin free. There’s also a ton of uses for it like cradle cap and chapped baby cheeks. Scroll on down for a full description. Have no need for nipple butter? Keep it in mind as a baby shower gift. Earth Mama® has a few products at Walmart that make great gifts for new mama friends. I actually have a friend who is about to have a baby any minute now (hi Megan) and I can’t wait to pack up some goodies to take to her.
Earth Mama Angel Baby® is available in 130 Walmart stores. Click here to see if it is in your store. If not, don’t worry it’s online too!
I’m also loving the Organic Milkmaid Tea. Anything I can do to help with milk supply, I’m all for! I wish I had the Organic Morning Wellness Tea during pregnancy. I could’ve used it all day, not just morning. Oh that feeling is so terrible (but worth it in the end). #amiright
The Natural Stretch Oil and New Mama Bottom Spray are also going on my baby shower gift list. Scroll down for a more detailed description.
Find these products at select Walmart stores and online. $5.97 - $14.97
Soothing, non-sticky Natural Nipple Butter is a lanolin-free calendula nipple cream for breastfeeding and extra dry skin. The first Non-GMO Project Verified nipple cream, Certified Made with Organic Calendula, this buttery, herbal salve comforts sore nipples and is safe for baby to ingest too - no need to wash it off before nursing! Chosen by hospitals, even for fragile NICU babies, clinically tested, non-irritating and dermatologically reviewed. Apply to nipples after each feeding, or as needed on dry patches, cradle cap, and drool rash. Lots of brilliant alternative uses, perfect for safe skincare, lips, cheeks, dry heels and rough elbows, excellent as a breast pump lube too.
Safe for pregnancy, luxurious Natural Stretch Oil was formulated with plant-based oils infused with the healing herbal goodness of organic calendula, organic borage oil and organic sweet orange pure essential oils to help nourish and encourage skin’s natural elasticity. Light and readily absorbable to help ease emerging stretch marks, and the 100% natural, delicate scent won’t aggravate morning sickness. For itchy, expanding belly, hips and breasts, also lovely as a silky luxurious bath oil and perfect for perineal massage. No artificial fragrance chemicals, petroleum products, mineral oil or other worrisome ingredients.
New Mama Bottom Spray is a cooling perineal mist made with antibacterial herbs and pure essential oils. Grab New Mama Bottom Spray (along with your peri bottle) to ease discomfort from postpartum vaginal soreness and swelling and hemorrhoids. The inverted sprayer makes the first few trips to the bathroom easier – it sprays upside down!
Organic Milkmaid Tea is a 100% Organic GMO free nursing tea with a fragrant and comforting blend of organic herbs traditionally used by breastfeeding mothers. Formulated with traditional herbal galactagogues like organic fennel seed and fenugreek to help support healthy breast milk production and promote healthy lactation. Tasty iced or hot. Non-GMO Project Verified.
Organic Morning Wellness Tea is a delicious blend of ginger root and spearmint, a safe hint of peppermint, soothing chamomile and lemon balm and a twist of orange peel. With herbs traditionally used to help settles stomach and ease morning queasies, nausea and travel tummy. Non-GMO Project Verified.
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30 Day Dietary Challenge for Your Health and Complexion
30 Day Dietary Challenge for Your Health and Complexion
30 Day Dietary Challenge for Your Health and Complexion
Slowly changing your daily intake of foods and beverages toward more fruits and veggies and less sugar and “bad” fats is the single most important dietary change you can make. It’s good for your body and you’ll see the impact in your complexion.
The skin is often like the tip of an iceberg in terms of being a sign that your internal health is ‘off.’
This applies to your internal system being out of wack because you are stressing your body with poor food and beverage choices. For instance, cutting out junk food and processed sugar has been proven to improve acne. Even better, adding foods like several helpings of green leafy vegetables, olive oil and avocados (healthy fats!) are known to be great for your complexion.
What do you think about setting a simple goal of adding two servings of vegetables a day and swapping out the soda pop (even sugar free diet soda) for the veggies?
If you do this, the benefits would be huge! Let this month be the beginning of the journey to a healthier diet and see how you feel. Don’t flog yourself, give up or feel overwhelmed because you think you have to get in exactly nine servings of fruits and veggies everyday for the rest of your life. Ease yourself into this new lifestyle by starting with two servings and slowly build as your body, your taste buds and your cravings adjust. Do it for a month, as it’s a lot less intimidating this way. Understand that this is a lifelong change – take it one day, one meal and one week at at time.
Remember, it’s not about “dieting.” That word has such a bad connotation that just typing it makes me cringe. A particular style of eating isn’t a diet. Diets, by definition, are a means to an end. When they are over, most people go back to old eating habits that are hurting their health and appearance. This is why I prefer implementing changes a little bit at a time.
Just like with a fitness program, your dietary changes need to be small and sustainable to let your body adjust. Look at this dietary change as a lifestyle. Start your new lifestyle in manageable steps that allows you to ease into it. The point is, whatever positive dietary changes you choose to implement in order to improve your health and appearance, make sure those changes are sustainable long after any goals you set are reached.
Still not convinced?
When you hear about people who are severely out of shape starting an exercise program, you know experts recommend that they start out small, doing what they can. Two flights of stairs to their floor at work. Parking at the back of the parking lot. Next, walking a mile three days a week. Then, one and a half miles three times a week. You have to start somewhere, and beginning where you are is a great place to be. Dietary changes are the same. Your body and mind need time to adjust.
So, where do you begin and what dietary changes make the biggest differences?
Dr. Bailey is a fan of mostly plant-based whole food, low glycemic, low-fat/smart-fat eating. She calls her dietary plan an Mediterranean Alkaline Dietary Food Plan. She outlines how she came to this lifestyle and why it works in her guide “How to Eat Your Way to Beauty and Health,” which you can download for free here.
Dr. Bailey found that eating like this cleared up a host of problems she’s battled over the years including arthritis, musculoskeletal pain and digestive misadventures. Right now, if your diet is radically different, but you are intrigued by what she advises in her Healthy Eating Guide, start slowly. Hold Dr. Bailey’s Food Pyramid as a goal, see how your body feels with small changes and advance your changes as your body adjusts. Know that the modern Western diet has this food pyramid turned upside down and that the top tip of “treats” form the base of most people’s daily food intake. The magnitude of change this food pyramid makes on the chemistry of the body is huge.
Ready to “detoxify” all that winter gunk and holiday indulgence?
Do you yearn to get the bloated, heavy feeling of “gunk” out of your system? Do you want to feel vital, healthy and well instead of encumbered and swinging from one craving to the next? Let’s enjoy winter by cozying up with healthy comfort foods, so that we emerge in the spring feeling (and looking!) really great.
Who is up for a 30 day dietary challenge?
Week 1:
Make it a priority to get at least two servings of vegetables and one serving of fruit each day. It may seem easy, but keep in mind, the idea is consistency.
Bonus: Instead of reaching for that soda pop, reach instead for 8 oz. of water. Add lemon, ginger, mint leaves or fruit muddled in the bottom of your glass. If you’re still thirsty, drink your soda pop. But, I bet your need for it will shrink.
Week 2:
Make it a priority to get at least three servings of vegetables and two servings of fruit each day. You may have to get a little creative here. Try roasting a big pan of veggies and put them in plastic containers for work. You can also open a can of beans and either throw them on a salad or heat them in the microwave for a quick snack. Another great tip is to cut up an apple and carrots and throw them into a plastic bag and take them with you to nibble on when you get hungry. Dr. Bailey carries nuts with her everywhere to stave off hunger.
Bonus: Instead of taking the elevator, try walking the stairs to work every morning. Even if you work on the 27th floor, take the elevator to the 23rd, and walk the rest of the flights.
Week 3:
Make it a priority to get at least four servings of vegetables and three servings of fruit each day. Smoothies are your best friend here. BHG.com has 10 smoothie recipes to experiment with. Get crazy and try adding some almond butter or oatmeal into your smoothie. Chia seeds are a great way to add texture and protein to your breakfast too.
Dr. Bailey uses her food processor or mandolin to thinly slice or shred veggies like red bell peppers, carrots, fennel, green cabbage, etc. She serves this under a warm entree, and eats them together. She loves the crunch with the warm food and it gets an extra serving of veggies in during a meal.
This is also a good time to try a Meatless Monday! Try one day where you get your proteins from plant sources rather than animal sources. You don’t have to do this every day, so it won’t be a huge change. But, it’s a chance to get more veggies in, plus lighten your dietary meat load just one day a week. Try it out and see how it works! If you need recipe ideas, at the end of Dr. Bailey’s Healthy Eating Guide, there’s a 14-day menu with plenty of recipes.
Bonus: Instead of having multiple cups of coffee each morning, try substituting one for a cup of green tea. While the caffeine content isn’t as high, the antioxidant properties more than make up for it. Plus, that carb craving you have midday could actually be because you’re crashing from hidden sugar in coffee drinks.
Week 4:
Make it a priority to get at least five servings of vegetables and four servings of fruit each day. Whew! That might seem like a lot, but think of it as an adventure in vegetable experimentation. Ever had jicama fries? How about cauliflower mashed potatoes? There are so many types of vegetables out there, and here’s a full list of fruit and veggie options! So, be adventurous! Like learning a language, you will gradually become proficient in getting your fruits and veggie servings easily into your diet. We all have our tips and tricks, so let’s share them with each other in the comments!
Bonus: Try adding different spices to your smoothies and food, like turmeric or ginger – spices are often hidden gems and powerhouses of vitamins and minerals that your body and skin soak up like a sponge.
Who’s up for this challenge?
We’d love to hear if you’re embracing dietary change as a way to improve how you look and feel. Let’s share any progress or tips you find. Let’s also share any challenges that you face along the way. We can’t wait to hear from you!
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