#i saw this randomly while searching about hermes

[elutrosop]

Speedsters core:

[khaire-traveler]

I just stumbled upon your blog a few days ago and absolutely love it! I hope your days get better, I'll be sending good energy your way :3

Question: How did you first get into paganism? (If its a personal story, no worries!) I got started by getting really into mythology and then it just blossomed into way more than that

Thank you for the well wishes! I'm feeling better today. ����

My answer is way longer than I intended it to be, so I'm adding a "read more". Apologies in advance, but thank you to anyone who decides to read it. XD

I'm more than ok answering that question! Honestly, I wasn't really interested in paganism at all for a while. I was open to it, but it wasn't on my radar. I had just left Christianity about five or six months prior, given Wicca a chance to discover I didn't vibe with it, and decided I would remain agnostic while practicing witchcraft instead. I honestly wasn't even sure if any deities existed at all at that point and didn't really have faith in anything (which I've since discovered is a necessity for me). I was also in a pretty bad place mentally and emotionally at that time.

Without warning, I started receiving strange dreams that featured Greek gods. I had literally never known anything about Greek mythology beforehand aside from Persephone's kidnapping and whatever was going on in Disney's Hercules, so having dreams about Greek gods was very strange for me. I decided to look into it further since the dream contained a lot of symbolism I honestly couldn't decipher. I spoke to the one and only pagan I knew at the time - a follower of some other Greek gods.

Now, this person sucked a lot and decided that it'd be a great idea to tell me that my dream either meant that Hermes was reaching out to me, there was some spirit haunting me, or I was going to DIE soon!?!?!?! Like, seriously, who says that to someone with literally no experience in anything pagan related???? Anywho, the first option was the actual truth.

For the next three weeks after that dream, I was in HEAVY denial that a god would ever be interested in having anything to do with me. Instead, I focused on the more pessimistic outcomes the asshole person suggested.

However, Lord Hermes was absolutely not just going to throw up his hands and walk off into the sunset. No, quite the contrary! He spammed the shit out of me with sign after sign after sign, and I continued to dismiss them, although I was getting increasingly more hopeful because I had read up on him and thought he was really cool. I remember saying aloud to myself while reading his cattle myth, "Now THIS is a god I would want to worship!"

Despite all the signs I was being sent, I kept eventually dismissing it as coincidence or a weird one-off event. Until one day, I went into my kitchen to start my day, and in the backyard, the entire ground was covered by a massive flock of black birds. They were even sitting on the fence because there was no room on the ground! They were literally everywhere; I had never seen that in all my years of living in that house, and I had never seen it again. As soon as I saw them, they immediately flew away, and Hermes' name randomly popped into my head.

I obviously couldn't ignore that.

Within the next few days, I tried my best to research everything about paganism and deity worship that I could. I tried reaching out to my shitty pagan friend, and she did give me some helpful pointers but mostly left me on my own. Weirdly, I couldn't find a lot of information on worshipping Hermes at that time. I barely had any social media (I didn't have a Tumblr yet and had never used it prior), so I wasn't sure who to ask for good research options. I tried the Hellenic Polytheism Reddit and was told to "just search it up". The reason I try to answer asks sent to me is partially because of the extremely unwelcoming people I came across in that community. I'm not sure if they've changed since then, as it's been several years, but I sure fucking hope they did, god damn.

Anyway, I often felt a presence "looking over my shoulder" whenever I'd research the topic. It honestly freaked me out a bit because I hadn't ever experienced that kind of thing so strongly before outside of some one-off experiences. I finally decided to put together a small display of offerings. I used a tealight candle and gave him quite a few trinkets I had gained over my travels. As I lit the candle, I started writing a letter to Hermes because I wasn't comfortable praying yet. The entire time, it felt as if someone was looking over my shoulder and watching me write. It was freaky at first but grew comforting over time.

I had asked Lord Hermes for help adopting a specific cat that I wanted to train to be a service animal. The cat was already used to walking on a leash and was a few years old (I didn't want a kitten at the time). I told him that I wasn't sure if I'd be able to adopt him because the adoption center seemed weirdly hell-bent on not allowing me to adopt him, despite the fact that he had been stuck there for a year already. I was financially stable enough to take care of him and could even prove it, but they were extremely unfriendly with me for whatever reason. I asked him if he could please ensure the adoption, as I had sent a message to the center earlier in the day and was hoping for a reply.

Well, I woke up the next day, and the cat had apparently been adopted by someone else, despite there being no mention of anyone else with an interest in him to me. I was crushed by this, but my mom came running into the room to tell me to get dressed and that we were getting a cat. I was super confused, obviously, but she told me that someone she had reached out to last night about literally the only other Siamese cat she could find in the state (needed that breed specifically due to cat allergies in the household) and had confirmed we could pick up the cat. The cat was professionally bred and would come with all his toys, a cat tree, all his food, and his litterbox. Instead of being $2,000 as the owner had originally bought him for, he was $500. Thankfully, we were in a place that we could make that payment.

The only downside for me was how young the cat was. He was six months old. I decided to push that aside and meet him in person. He immediately loved me. He purred loudly and rubbed against me specifically. He barely even interacted with any of the other four people in the room; it was like he already wanted to be my best friend. I can't describe how wonderful that felt for me.

Suffice to say, we brought him home lol. On the way home, we passed a sign I had never seen in the city before. "Hermés", the brand, but I took as a very literal sign that my letter had been received.

Since then, I've been worshipping Lord Hermes! He means a great deal to me and has helped me through some extremely difficult times these past four years. He introduced me to many more deities, and over time, I found myself becoming a Hellenic Polytheist rather than a Hellenic Pagan. I'm happier with my religion than I've ever been, and I'm certain that I made the right choice that afternoon that I lit a tealight candle and wrote a letter.

Thank you for asking and reading this long ass answer lol. Sorry for any typos; I decided not to proof read it. I'm glad you found happiness in the pagan path as well! Take care, and have a wonderful day/night. 🧡

[dynastyau]

The Dinner pt. 4

It’s finally here friends! I am so sorry for the delay. My life, like everyone’s right now, is just super crazy and I haven’t had time to finish this part. This is probably trash but truthfully I’m happy I actually finished it. This was so tough for me to write, it was just so heartbreaking and I wanted to say so much but it would give away other parts I am working on. 

Anyway I really hope you all enjoyed this mess and the whole Dinner “series”

-MaKenzie ♥️

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The entire dining room was confused as to why the young boy took off. They tried yelling after him but it was ignored. Persephone noticed that Hermes looked annoyed with the whole situation and right now was the perfect opportunity to find out what happened. “Hermes?” She waited for the man to set down his wine glass, “What is going on between you and the boy?”

Hermes thought back to the argument that he and Orpheus had in the car on the way here. He remembers the yelling and hurt he could see in the young boy’s eyes. It was hard for Hermes to be angry with the boy, he truly loved the boy and hated yelling at him. He regrets the way he handled the current situation but also knew that what he said needed to be said. “We just had a little argument before we came over here,” he tried to sound as impassive as possible.

Argument? Persephone was having a hard time believing in this. It was very rare that those two ever fought and it was always resolved quickly. This was the first time that either of them has argued this much. It wasn’t like either of them to leave an argument without resolving it. “Argument? About what?” Hades was also curious about what really happened.

Hermes didn’t want to discuss what the argument was about. He knew that Orpheus had been talking to Persephone almost nightly about this decision. Whether he wanted to admit it or not he was upset that the boy turned to Persphone rather than himself. He wasn’t sure why the boy didn’t trust him enough to speak to him about this decision. That was a big part of the argument, Hermes had sat on this anger for a while and it just overflowed. “It was truly nothing,” he was really trying to avoid this conversation, “Just a simple argument about this decision to come home.”

Persephone knew that there was more to this story than Hermes was letting on. While Persephone wanted nothing more than to continue this conversation she also didn’t want to ruin her family dinner. She was already annoyed that the tension between the two boys created an unhappy feeling. All she wanted was a sweet welcome home dinner for her nephew.

Speaking of Orpheus he still hadn’t returned after randomly running out of the room. Hades continued to poke at Hermes, oblivious to the growing annoyance of his wife. The grown men slightly argued about the lack of communication, only igniting Persephone’s annoyance. Abruptly the woman stood up, “I am going to check on the boy. When I get back the arguing is done. Tonight we are celebrating the return of our dear boy not arguing about pointless stuff!”

The men were left stunned at her outburst, their eyes never leaving her as she stormed out of the room. Hades felt ashamed for upsetting his wife. He was completely oblivious to how she was feeling, she was always great at hiding when something was wrong.

The woman searched all around her house, unable to find Orpheus. It wasn’t until she saw that the front door still ajar she found him. When she saw him she felt her own heartbreaking. The young man was collapsed on his knees, his back shook as he freely sobbed. In an instant, she gathered the fragile boy in her arms. He clung to her like a lost child, he was begging for any comfort. He would rather be in the arms of the girl he loves but she doesn’t want him.

Negative thoughts have been darkening the eternal sunshine in his soul. Why would she ever forgive him? He absolutely destroyed her. She used to be so full of life and now..he sees no light in her eyes. All he sees is the hatred that she harbors for him in her eyes. That is going to haunt him for the rest of his life.

Persephone had no clue what was going on with the boy. She had no clue who hurt him this bad. She did know if this had anything to do with Hermes that she would destroy him. She had never seen the young boy so distraught before. Even though she has observed him falling down this path through their recent phone conversations, she never expected to see him like this. It was tough to watch the young man she helped raise broken on the porch.

His hand was reaching out as if he was begging to reach out and touch something, something. Seeing the young man so debilitated at this moment was almost too much for her. She remembers when she herself was this broken, this lost, but she had Hades to help her out. While she knew this his family was going to do everything they can to help him out, she knew not having “a person” would make this even more difficult for him.

It took several minutes for the boy to even be slightly calm. Persephone remained silent, just rubbing soothing circles and cradling the broken boy. She felt hopeless at this moment like she was failing her nephew. When the young man’s breathing finally evened out she thought it was time to address what happened.

Without saying anything she rose to her feet leaving a hand out to help him up. He looked confusingly at the outstretched hand, his aunt’s face holding a look of sorrow. Cautiously he reached out accepting the help. She gathered him into her arms, leading him to the porch swing. The two sat side by side in silence, just enjoying a moment of peace.

Orpheus couldn’t take his eyes off of the end of the drive, where he last saw Eurydice. Persephone noticed this, she believed that he just wanted to leave, to escape. “When you’re ready to talk, I’m here.” She kept her voice soft.

He appreciated her patience with him at this moment. His fragile soul was hanging on by a thread, one move could shatter him forever. “I’m sorry for ruining your dinner Aunt Steph,” this was a true statement. He knew how important family dinners were to her and this probably caused problems. Just another thing that he did wrong…

“Honey,” she paused, placing her hand on his cheek forcing him to look at her. His broken soul shone brightly in the depths of his eyes. Her heart ached even more for the young boy, no one deserved to hurt this much. “Right now dinner doesn’t matter, what matters is what happened to you. You are clearly broken and I can’t help you if you won’t tell me why. I will wait till you are ready to tell me but my heart aches for you son.”

The motherly side of her was demanding that she force him to say what happened right now but she was fighting it back. If she pushed him even in the slightest he would break for good. Orpheus wanted to tell her what happened. He wanted to confide in his Aunt like he had for his entire life. Everything in him was begging him to spill everything, to get all of it off his chest.

It felt like bricks were lying on his chest, it was tough to breathe, his heart was barely beating. He wanted to just run away and never return at this moment. What point does he have in living anymore? His godfather was extremely disappointed in him. His Aunt was going to have a heart attack worrying for him. But none of those things hurt him the most.

What hurts the most was that the one person he ever truly loved ran away from him. He came home for her. She was his future, he was sure of it, or he used to be. Right now he wasn’t sure about anything. All he was sure about is that he messed up big time.

His heart was completely shattered into a million pieces and the one person who could fix it wanted nothing to do with him.