#i saw anastasia tonight! my favorite musical! and it was so good and fun! but i just keep fucking ruining everything

[navysealt4t]

nothing like having a night that should be all fun but i’m sat alone at 1 am crying because i just fuck everything up always

[frenchibi]

hey, so i thought maybe you could tell us a little what you're currently interested in? ♥ like, what have you been doing during quarantine, are there any new shows you watched that you enjoyed a lot, did you maybe take up a new hobby or something? :)

Hello!! I did not forget this lovely message, I was just in no state to answer (who’d have thought that recovery from surgery is, y’know, taxing) BUT I’M BACK NOW and ohhhh do you know what you’ve unlocked by asking me this question...?? I cannot give you a comprehensive list but I can tell you a couple of the things that I got into during quarantine, and the things I am currently super passionate about! My memory is, uh, not great but thankfully I do journal and write down things so I am confident I can answer this for you :D (plus I do always love recommending things so - aaa??? Thank you for this ask????)

Putting things under a cut because I physically cannot chill but if tl;dr I want you to take away one thing from this it’s that everyone should read Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir. Thoughts below.

(Also. I would love to go off about my interests more on here but am not sure what... shape that should ideally take? Text posts? IDK pls give me suggestions, help me out?? dfhasjkldf)

Movies

I have not seen many, but I can and will scream about The Old Guard over and over because... it was everything I never knew I needed in an action movie?? I don’t reblog many things about it anymore but I love love LOVED it!!

Also, upon recommendation by one of my friends from India, I have been delving into the world of Bollywood movies and WOW Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara was so fucking good??? idk if it’s on Netflix in every country but it is in mine and I highly recommend it. It’s thoughtful, honest, emotional and shot absolutely gorgeously, and it also has that cheesiness that is just... so good... sometimes you just need the cheese y’know???

(Side note, 2020 was the year I saw Pride and Prejudice (2005) for the first time and I am a changed woman. It is now my ultimate comfort movie. Please see it if you have not, I cannot believe it took me this long. I saw it for the first time on an airplane (in january... a lifetime ago) and have seen it many, many times since.)

TV Shows

So, to everyone’s shock but especially my own, I have not really been into TV lately? I watched The Boys because my brother recommended it (it’s good, but gorey and pulls no punches, the R rating is deserved), and recently started watching Jujutsu Kaisen because my sister recommended it (I haven’t watched a new anime in like a year which is kinda wild to me? But I am enjoying this one - the opening SLAPS and what I’ve seen so far has been fun! Plus I’m watching it with my sister and I like sending her reactions xD),,, and that’s pretty much it for this category?? I am aware there is a LOT of good shit out there I just.. .don’t seem to have the attention span for multiple episodes of a Thing these days. Meh. I’m sure it’ll come back to me eventually ^^

Musical Theater

One of the main reasons I think I haven’t been big into TV is because my Musical Passion is in FULL SWING (haha get it). Probably because the only thing that has remained for me during this quarantine is my singing lessons (and lemme tell you... over skype, that shit is ROUGH but still better than not singing at all) and I have been obsessing over learning new songs and finding shows through recommendations and compilation videos on youtube... So.

Shows I listen to a lot these days include Starry, Anastasia, The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals, Come From Away (I made a post recently specifically about musicals, you should be able to find it under #French speaks) - specific songs in my range that I am currently learning and obsessing over include “Bring on the men” from Jekyll and Hyde, “The Mad Hatter” from Wonderland, “Show Yourself” from Frozen 2 (I liked it ok I DID), and “Go Tonight” from The Mad Ones (this one makes me cry... I’m making my sister duet it with me bc I can’t stop thinking about it).

Also, if you’re interested in hearing me sing things, head over to my instagram where I post covers (and also art)!!

(Musical people, I am curious to hear opinions about Great Comet, and also The Count of Monte Cristo - two shows I’ve been meaning to check out!)

Video Games

Listen. Animal Crossing New Horizons is awesome and I’m glad I have it (...give me Brewster back, Nintendo, or I WILL RIOT), but I have been branching out into other games for the Switch (might as well make this purchase worth it amirite) - current faves include Celeste (which is SO HARD but also SO FUCKING FUN) and Spiritfarer which I specifically bought to play at the hospital bc I knew I was going to be there for a few days, and let me tell you - best decision of 2020. Please watch the trailer if you haven’t heard of it, it’s GORGEOUS and beautiful and emotional and I loved every second of it. Both of these can also be purchased for PC and I think they are definitely worth the investment!!

In other news I’m back on my Stardew Valley bullshit. It’s just so calming.I revisit it a lot lmao

Books

So... I have been reading. A LOT. I read over 70 books this year, which for me is... average tbh? I have had some less productive reading months but overall I have torn through stuff and BOY do I have recommendations if you want them?? For the sake of brevity I will only mention a few here:

Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir “Lesbian necromancers explore a haunted gothic palace in space”. That is all. This was my first five star fiction book of the year and I will never be done screaming about it. There is a dedicated but smallish fandom here on tumblr and it deserves SO MUCH MORE. Please, please please. Everyone should read this damn book. It’s confusing in the beginning but I promise it’s worth it IT’S SO GOOD!! And also the sequel is out and it’s also confusing and SO GOOD!!!

Educated by Tara Westover. This is an autobiography and it’s one of those books that like. Stick in your mind for months after you’ve read it. It’s about how this woman escaped an abusive household that was religiously oppressive and also like... survivalist (prepping for the apocalypse) and avidly believed in conspiracy theories - by educating herself, working her way up to going to Harvard. Nothing I say could do the emotional impact of this book justice - and also just, the perspective this book gave me?? Incredible. Education is the most powerful tool and this woman grabbed it by the hair and did not let go and I was FLOORED. Everyone should read this. I don’t even usually read biographies but DAMN.

The Winternight trilogy by Katherine Arden.(Book 1 is called The Bear and the Nightingale). This is a bit of a slow burn type deal - it’s a retelling of a Russian fairy tale (I think?? Or like a folk... story? Something like that) and it is just. So magical. It’s not fast paced but it works up to FANTASTIC moments, the focus is on family and magic and change and “making your own way” and all three of these books were wonderful. It reminded me of Naomi Novic’s Uprooted and Spinning Silver (both of which I also loved back in 2019 and would highly recommend) and they are PERFECT winter reads if you’re looking for something to get cozy with. I liked book 1 well enough but books 2 and 3 knocked it out of the park. Fantastic. Loved them.

I have many more recs but this will do for now hahah

Music

Gonna keep this brief too - my music taste is all over the place, but here are some songs I have been obsessed with recently!! Beware of genre whiplash though because these are Very Different from one another (and different from the musical theater stuff above)

Factories - Autoheart (that bridge gets me every time, idk why. This is one I could have on repeat for hours and not get tired of it either. Something about it just gets me!!)

History Read - The Altogether (The lyrics!! Tbh the entire Silo album is GREAT, but this one is my fave. Their music is so... mellow, in the best way??)

Weather Man - Valley of Wolves (ok this one is just a banger. I’m a sucker for a good sing-along-able hook (that’s not a word. you get me though right) and this fucking DELIVERS. I also just think “I make these dark skies blue, I make these mountains move, let the rain come down, I’m pushing through.... [pause] ... ���cause I’m the weather man” is such good execution of a concept?? That PAUSE GETS ME it’s just SO FUN?!?! idk man I like a good upbeat banger and this is that.)

I believe (get over yourself) - Nico Vega (this one is just a callout at myself tbh?? “you’re a fool” I AM and I needed to hear it?? It’s also SO FUN to sing!!! We love a banger.)

Kiss me you animal - Burn the Ballroom (mentioning this mainly because it reminded me, lyrically, of Gideon the Ninth and I need someone to confirm this for me before I go insane?? “everybody knows that home is where your teeth sink, love” - I mean c’mon??? Also it’s a banger. I do like some rock from time to time... and this also has a killer driving bassline. This is super fun to drive to, too!!)

((If we have overlap and anyone wants to exchange playlists with me - I am SO here for it. Always looking for new music!!! I mean it!!))

Youtube

Last and certainly not least... meet my newest hyperfixation!!! I have always loved watching video essays, and booktube videos, and arttube videos - and my current niche of favorite creators is the Polygon video team!! They made videos about video games and board games and anything gaming-related and I just. I’m only peripherally a “gamer(TM)” but I love anything and everything they create. (Also you don’t have to know much about video games to enjoy all of their content!! A lot of it is still accessible to Non-Gamers(TM) or casual gamers!) BDG is my new favorite creator, the Unraveled series he does on the channel is a work of genius - but I have also started watching their streams and older series and I am enjoying myself SO MUCH! I love boardgames so their series on them, Overboard, is so fun and entertaining (and I already know a bunch of games I want to buy based on seeing the gameplay), and it also made me invested in the other creators - particularly Simone, I would die for Simone?? And Pat? And Jenna? They each have their niche and they work really well together too and their videos are my Main Serotonin Machine in these trying times(TM), thank you for coming to my TED talk.

Also. If you’re already following me here and you are familiar with Polygon things I BEG YOU TO COME AND TALK TO ME ABOUT THEM because I am like, bursting, but I also don’t want to flood my dash with stuff that 99% of my followers are unfamiliar with y’know??

...I think I’m going to leave it at this - it’s already a lot!

But thank you once again for asking and for letting me Go Off about things I am interested in!! I just... I very often wish I could do this more, but I’m not sure how to go about it? Should I just do text posts about things?? Would that be interesting to anyone?? Or is that like, annoying? Should I start a review blog or something? dhfajkldhf I just want to talk about things that excite me, but whenever I’m here I often just stick to reblogging other people’s stuff... help?? What do y’all want to see??

[moretreasurewithinarchive]



Ella's mother calls her clever at least twice that I heard.

LITTLE ELLA HAS A LEGIT FULL SIZED CAROUSEL HORSE IN HER BEDROOM??? And with that, it looks like there was at least 1 puppet stage, what I can only assume to be a carousel music box but it's built like a Christmas Pyramid, a mobile, and a canopy bed.

The way she and her dad both say thank you this must have been very difficult for you when they get news the one they love is dying???

The Just So and Shall We lines repeat too.

The dress she's wearing when her father returns and when her mother's dying are the same, it just had fake flowers on it when he returns.

We see 3 different Ella's walking with her father toward the meadow. There's little Ella in Black after her mother dies, then what I assume is teenage Ella in a white or blue floral dress sand her hair work to the side and flowing over her shoulder, and then Lily.

Ella lets her shoes hand off her feet a lot

Her physical reaction to her father mentioning Lady Tremaine even before he says anything about marriage.

That butterfly comb will never NOT remind me of Rose's in Titanic.

I can't see anyone in that time period actually making their day Lucifer???

I hate Lady Tremaine's black hat when we first meet her.

The way Ella smiles and laughs for her father and then visibly deflates the instant he turns around KILLS me.

When the Tremaines arrive, Ella's mother's portrait is on the bookshelf in the study/parlor/whatever that room is where she died.

Drisella tells Anastasia their mother's lying about the house being charming and says it's just manners. Anastasia tells her to shut up.

The look Ella's father gives Anastasia when she says they never thought to decorate, and how he looks back at Ella.

Before he leaves on that last trip, Ella KNOWS he isn't well and she can tell something going to happen.

Why the fuck does Tremaine get so jealous of hearing about Ella's mother when she CLEARLY doesn't love her father?

The way Anastasia and Tremaine both look at Drisella after the complexion line kills me.

Like... Tremaine legit kept up a smile until the carriage pulled away and it was gone in less time than it took to blink.

The harp just sitting in the corner. Totally Ella's mother's. Js.

When Tremaine banishes her to the attic, it sounds like Ella was going to say something about staying in a smaller room?

By the time Ella and Tremaines talk in the study/parlor, all of her things, her father's things, and her mother's things are packed up and set aside, including the portrait of her mother. Suspicious much?

Anastasia and Drisella have toys. At first, we are Anastasia holding a doll and Drisella a rabbit, but they switch later.

Casual reminder that Ella's the youngest, since Anastasia calls her their little sister.

I want a full version of Lily singing Sing Sweet Nightingale and Lavender's Blue.

There are flower decorating and motifs all over this house. The walls. The clothes. Even in the stone wall in the kitchen.

Ella's look at Drisella while she's singing. And like... Tremaine herself tells her to shut up, but she gets mad at Ella for being like cringe.

Ella immediately knows as soon as she opens the door and see Farmer John.

Tremaine is a damn good actress though. Her eyes treating when they get the news.

THE BEEHIVES ARE SO CUTE.

That red bedroom of Tremaine's is so garish though.

Another casual reminder: ELLA NEVER GOT TO PROPERLY MOURN HER FATHER BECAUSE SHE WAS WORKING 24/7.

I imagine the scraps they gave her to eat lessened as time went on and they had less food and money. But she always shared them, no matter how meager.

Jacqueline is iconic.

A GIANT POT OF LAVENDER IS AT THE BOTTOM OF THE STAIRS TO THE ATTIC FROM THE KITCHEN.

Gods that robe of Tremaine's is AWFUL.

"Is there someone we've forgotten" They're dehumanizing her already. What a cunt.

Ella riding barebacked and workout reigns will never NOT impress me tbh.

Convince me the stag wasn't a test for both Ella and Kit from Fairy godmother.

Gods Richard was PERFECT in this role. And every time I hear his real accent I'm shook.

Kit's fucking whipped from the start.

Ella only calls him Kit. You can't tell me otherwise.

His sympathy when she says "They treat me as well as they're able". Tell me that this like doesn't ring in his head later and that's why he knows she's been stopped from coming to him.

RICHARD'S DIMPLES

IT'S KIT. KIT. I'M KIT. You absolute fucking disaster of a man 🤣🤣

And you know the Captain never lets him live that down.

Kit goes away a little and comes back when he says he hopes to see her again.

Ella's little lip bite.

Gods those blue and yellow split outfits on the palace staff are ATROCIOUS.

The banter with Kit and the King. And Kit and Ella in the secret garden.

MASTER PHINEAS.

Why are Kit's outfits so attractive?? 🥺

Kit and the king are so short compared to the Captain and the Grand Duke.

The Captain's laugh.

"That's very kind of you. To think of me." My poor baby.

THE LOOKS AFTER SHE CLAPS BACK IN FRENCH. SLAY.

Also, "I speak French not Italian".

Kit, honey you can say it's for the people all you want. You're not fooling anyone.

What the actual fuck does moonface even mean??

Ella making her dress in a day??? Damn girl.

I love Fairy godmother's beggar woman cloak???

Gods I HATE Lady Tremaine.

Ella's pink dress swear her mother's wedding dress like in the deleted song from the cartoon. And this is the hill I'll die on.

"Hairy dogfather" JFC.

I'd have liked the whole fairy godmother getup better without those dinky little wings tbh.

Ella not knowing what cantaloupe is.

MR. FUCKING GOOSE.

I'm sorry, but the lizard footmen creep me out. THEY DIDN'T NEED TO GIVE THEM THOSE TEETH LIKE WTF.

Ok but like... Would the greenhouse have been repaired at midnight though???

Honestly, Disney deprived us all of Lily being trapped in the pumpkin a la the Cinderella episode of Britannica's Tales Around the World with Pat Morita.

WHY TRANSFORM THE MICE. IT'S A FARM. THEY HAVE HORSES.

"I can't drive, I'm a goose" is my favorite line.

Unpopular opinion??? But I liked the ballgown better either without the butterflies or during the transformation when there was only those few blue ones.

I do like the gold butterflies in the slippers though.

I want to know how they got the crystals to stay in Lily and Helena's hair.

Sitting in a crinoline must be awful.

The palace is stunning.

I love every single one of the chandeliers in this movie.

The king waves at Chelina and Kit KNOWS.

The girl on the staircase next to the Tremaines when they get introduced laughs at them. And honestly, same.

"Someone I meet once TONIGHT".

For real, how did the guards at the stairs not hear Ella's name or that her footman was a lizard? They were like not even 5 feet away.

Ella playing with her skirt when she happy and scared.

KIT'S SMILE.

I wish we saw more of the purple in the ballgown.

I love that Ella's descent had Lavender's Blue and the dance has Once Upon A Dream in the score.

The Captain HAD to have told Kit that the Grand Duke already promised him to Chelina. And who gave him the right to do that anyway?

Kit's stammering.

Ella's gasp when he takes her waist and the way she looks at him is like the signature Lily shot. They did the same thing in War & Peace.

"They're all looking at you. Believe me they're all looking at YOU".

The one part in the dance where they kinda flap their arms up and down reminds me of a butterfly and idk why.

Dancing wearing a sword had to be tough. Especially when your partner's in a crinoline and a heavy ass dress. Props to Richard.

Lily tripping at one point during the dance.

Even Chelina loves Ella let's be real here.

Why is there so much telling people to shut up in this movie???

WE GOTTA FACE FACTS HERE, KIT AND ELLA ARE EVEN BETTER AND MORE LOVING PARENTS THAN THEIR OWN WERE.

I love the secret garden scene so much.

When Kit puts the shoe on her foot... Why is that like 😏😏. I hate feet. Why is that breathtakingly romantic??

Why do they always hesitate? GO AFTER HER IMMEDIATELY DAMN IT.

The crier's aids when he hits his head on the stairs.

Ella's interaction with the king.

Kit you're so slow. She's in glass heels and a crinoline and she still outran you.

DISNEY I WANT A DIRECTOR'S CUT OF THE FILM WITH ALL THE DELETED SCENES PUT BACK IN. I NEED KIT SAYING THE LADY ISN'T HERE TO DEFEND HERSELF.

They honestly don't see the footman using his coat tails to lower the portcullis??

Anastasia actually seemed pretty nice to Ella after the ball? Saying she looked cheerful and patting her arm? But then again, we really only see Tremaine and Drisella ripping the dress soooo?

ELLA YOU CAN'T KEEP A SECRET TO SAVE YOUR LIFE.

Girl you need a better hiding place than under the floorboards.

But like the music in the attic after the ball is so sweet???

KIT AND HIS FATHER. THANK YOU FOR LETTING HIM CRY AND SAY I LOVE YOU.

Also like... Notice that Tremaine's Just so to Ella's father was really patronizing and condescending. Ella's to Kit was insecure and uncertain. But the king's to Kit was proud.

At least Kit's not dumb. He's meet this girl multiple times. He don't need a shoe to tell him it's her.

WHY RIP THE ORIGAMI BUTTERFLY THOUGH.

Ella was full on ready to die in that attic to save Kit.

Why do all they guys' pants fit really well except Stellan's? His are loose and baggy.

Y'all know this girl is young and blonde wtf.

Also, fun fact. The girl that asks the Captain if she can try the other foot is Mimi Ndiweni. She played Fringilla in The Witcher on Netflix.

The Grand Duke turning away from the old lady, but the Captain letting her yet the slipper on anyway. 🥺

I want to know where in the line Kit was hiding.

Also how many takes they had to do of Sophie and Holliday trying the slipper on. Cause I wouldn't have been able to do it without laughing. Especially at Holliday's face.

Like... Even if the plan had gone down the way the Grand Duke and Tremaine wanted, I don't see him keeping his word to make her a counted and get good marriages for Anastasia and Drisella.

"YOU HAVE NEVER BEEN AND YOU NEVER WILL BE MY MOTHER".🗣️🗣️

Ella and Kit is my favorite score in the whole movie.

You know, the girls actually seen happy for Ella. Especially Anastasia. Her and Ella getting along better like in Dreams Come True is canon ok.

NEVER GONNA GET OVER KIT AND ELLA WEARING THEIR PARENTS' RINGS.

I love Ella's wedding gown.

Where did they get all those flowers in the winter though 😂

[rightwristwatch]

Brad Simpson - Drunk in Love

Word count: 1379

Warnings: Swearing and drinking

You and Brad had been friends for a little while now and for the most part you had been just that, friends. But over the past few months it had become clear to the both of you that there definitely could be more there. You had always hung out as much as possible so it was relatively easy to keep secret seeing as to your friends and family everything was as it had always been. All week, Brad had been really busy given it was album release week which meant you hadn’t gotten to spend so much time together and the time spend together the main theme definitely was Brad being exhausted which, to be fair, was fully understandable. Friday had finally rolled around meaning the album party was tonight and you were beyond excited to say the least. You, Brad and all of your closest friends just being together and celebrating an amazing achievement for the boys. You and Anastasia had decided to meet up and get ready together at her and Tris’s place and help her set everything up which was no issue because you found her to be the best company. You showered, put on some comfy clothes and packed a bag with some different outfit choices, shoes and makeup and headed off. London traffic on a Friday night was always terrible but due to your excitement and the great weather it just made it feel that much worse. You had your windows down sitting in stand still traffic blasting your new favorite album just loving life. You finally made it and it was so nice to see Stas again, it felt like it had been ages and it was amazing to just catch up, get ready and drink some champagne.

The night started out pretty chill, family was present, food was amazing, company was outstanding and the atmosphere couldn’t have been better. Seeing Brad and the boys happy and spending a worry free night together was so amazing. Now, there were many reasons you loved Brad and even more reasons why you loved drunk Brad and as the hours passed, the families saw it as their chance to leave but the alcohol just kept coming and everything just seemed to get better and better. Brad was never shy to show affection and it was only enforced by the alcohol and that’s kind of were the trouble started. None of you were sober and you were stood around playing beer pong. It was you, Brad and Luke on one team versus Tris, Joe and Connor on the other team and slowly, a pretty big audience had gathered. As the games passed you could definitely start to feel the effects of the alcohol but at this point you didn’t care. The games was going well, very well in fact. You were winning by quite a bit and being the bad drunk winners both you and Brad were you enjoyed making fun of the others lacking beer pong skills. After the game, Stas dragged you to the dance floor not that you really minded seeing as the music had been absolute fire all night. A little while later, Tris joined and then it just felt like third wheeling so you turned around to walk away only to be stopped in your tracks by Brad and when asked to dance you obviously couldn’t refuse though maybe you both knew it was a bad idea. And what do you know, you ended up kissing which was nothing new for the two of you but seeing as you hadn’t told anyone else about it, it obviously didn’t go by unnoticed when you were snapped out of the makeout session by Tris and Stas just standing there basically shouting at you, freaking out with the biggest smile on their faces making other people turn around to see what was going on. In that moment, you and Brad just looked at each other knowing you had kind of fucked the whole ‘we’ll just let it be our secret for a little longer’-plan. Stas shrieked something that definitely wasn’t English and grabbed your arm pulling you into the living room and further into the bedroom sitting you down. ‘Here we go’, you thought, knowing this meant going in Stas’s hot seat.

Turned out you weren’t wrong, she, Kirstie and Laura had what seemed like all the questions in the world to ask. Though you were a bit upset about no longer having it be your little secret, it was actually kind of nice having it out there because talking about a person you love with your best friends is honestly so good and it just felt right. Talking about it all also made you reflect on the time you had had so far and it made you beyond excited for what the future had in store. It also meant you and Brad could make out and be as affectionate as you wanted to which definitely wasn’t a downside. The four of you ended up talking undisturbed, with your champagne that the ever forward thinking Stas had brought, for well over an hour. It wasn’t until Brad poked his head around the corner of the wall requesting to speak with you. The girls “ooh’d” as you got up, to no surprise.

‘I hope this doesn’t change anything’ Brad started by saying, you couldn’t help but smile. It was weird to see Brad so insecure and nervous all of the sudden. He usually always seemed so confident in everything he did, it was one of things you admired most about him. The way he swayed a room when he entered it making everyone turn their head even if it was just for a second. He just had that aura about him. Though you could still both hear the alcohol in the way he spoke and smell it on his breath, you could tell that the concern was real. ‘Of course it doesn’t. It really doesn’t change anything, I’m still as into as before but now I get to discuss everything with my best friends so it really isn’t actually that bad’ you calmly said and smiled sweetly. ‘Good’ he said as half smiled to the side as he moved closer, placing his lips on yours. You embraced the affection and deepened the kiss. Being able to just kiss him when you felt like it actually felt so good. You were starting to wonder why you hadn’t just told people immediately. He was yours and you were his and now all the people you cared about knew it. You never thought you would feel like this with anyone. All your past relationships had been good but this one was different, in a way it felt like this was the first one that felt a hundred percent right, it felt like it mattered more than anything and that everything was as it was meant to be. Maybe it was because you had been friends for so long and in a sense your friendship was on the line so it felt like it had to matter because losing Brad would never be an option. ‘I love that boy, would never dream of saying it though, I’m too cocky to be the first to say it.’ You thought, making yourself smile. ‘What?’ Brad asked in an unsure laughter. ‘Nothing’ you smiled giving him a quick peck on the lips ‘I’m just happy’, you said grabbing his hand and walking back out to balcony and the party. The city lights and night sky with the speakers booming was slowly replaced with the quiet noise of the morning traffic driving by on the streets beneath you and the sun rising and warming your faces. You, Brad, Tris and Stas had been sat outside since the last people left about two hours ago talking over a cup of tea and just reflecting on everything and enjoying eachothers company. It was moments like these that made all the pain of the travel and hectic days that never seemed to end worth it all. Because you got sit in the arms amazing person in the world. It just felt so pure and looking back, you had never experienced happiness like what you felt that morning.

[jaclynnicole-blog]

NYC BIRTHDAY TRIP (MARCH 2019)

Ok, so it has been awhile since I have written on my personal blog. Time to update and all that has happened this year. I cannot believe half of the year is over! Where did the time go? Well, the year 2019 didn’t really start off too well and was dealing probably what has been one of the hardest moments of my life. Our family dog, Romeo, (who had just turned 14 November 8th 2018) was diagnosed with Cancer in December... He seemed a bit better as we had a given him some pain medication to help but as soon as it ran out he was not eating or drinking... It happened so quickly and by the end of February we had to make the THE decision to put him to sleep. We had gotten Romeo my Senior year of high school so our first dog, Sonny, had someone to be around. I was super close with Romeo remembering every step of when we got him (Close to Valentine’s Day 2005). I cried myself to sleep the very first night without Romeo and will never every forget to this day still have this hole left in my heart...

This Birthday Trip seemed like one that was meant to be more than ever. As I sit here writing this blog post, I am listening to one of my favorite Musical Soundtracks, “Anastasia: The Musical”. It has a very special meaning to me and it all started last Summer (Read one of my previous blog posts).

As soon as I saw “Anastasia” for the first time, I knew I had to go back but this time I decided to plan a trip during my actual Birthday week and see the show on my actual Birthday. Mind you I was thinking this as soon as I got off the plane Summer 2018. In November, I started planning out my Birthday trip and knew I wanted to see “Frozen: The Musical” as an actual Birthday Gift so that is what my whole family decided to chip in on. I originally planned to see the show by myself but ended up seeing the show with my younger cousin Charlotte. Only fitting since she took me to see the 1st “Frozen” movie. My Aunt found a really good deal on tickets and we had the best seats ever! More on that later. as March was getting closer I knew I wanted to spend more than one day in NYC, especially sine I was seeing “Frozen” the night before my actual Birthday. Before I had even purchased a ticket, “Anastasia” announced that the show would be closing on March 31st, just a few days after my Birthday (March 28th). I definitely had a moment of sadness but I knew this Birthday Trip would mean even more now. Calling to get tickets was definitely a bit crazy I was afraid of not securing a ticket before it closed. I purchased a ticket which was one of the last deals I would fine last minute over the phone. There are two shows usually on Wednesdays on Broadway, so I asked myself what other show did I want to see that would be super special? “Prom: The Musical” had started on Broadway in November but had a long Journey before getting there and one of my former dance friends (we were swing partners) was a part of this Musical! I said “Ok, this would be perfect!” I quickly purchased a ticket and was set to see three Broadway shows my Birthday week! I was super excited as I have never been away on my actual Birthday!

TUESDAY: MARCH 26TH 2019

Come Tuesday, March 26th I was all set and ready packed for my week away. I was staying with my Aunt and Uncle who I always have a wonderful time with.My flight was at 7:30AM and I would get into NY around 10AM. My whole flight to New York, I finished up the rest of my book and biography of Sara Bareilles “Waitress: The Musical”. My Aunt picked me up and we headed back to their house. We had a nice lunch at the house and caught up. Mid day my Aunt and I decided to head to the stores. Later that night, my Aunt took me to a Chinese place that was super good! Was so great to spend time with my Aunt and was excited for the rest of the week! We headed back to their house and my Aunt and I sat down to watch an episode of “This Is Us”! As soon as we finished I got settled and ready for bed.

WEDNESDAY: MARCH 27TH 2019

It was nice not to have to rush out to NYC, but I would be there everyday if I could. I left for the train station around 10:30AM. Took the train into the City to get there between Noon and 1pm. I was set to see “Prom: The Musical” at 2pm. As I was on the train, I was texting my dance friend, Teddy, and asked about him coming out after the show, he sadly had told me he had something scheduled and wouldn’t be out. I took one shot and asked about seeing him quickly before the show. He said he could make that work as he would arrive at the theatre a bit later than some of the other cast members. I got into the City just before 1pm at Penn Station on 33rd. I headed over to 48th Street where “Prom: The Musical” was at Longacre Theatre. I was super excited to get a message on the way there that Teddy was able to say a quick hi BEFORE the show as he was going into the theatre. He waited until I arrived for a quick hi and photo. I was super blessed to be able to see him. I was at the top of the theatre but was super intimate and was still a great seat to enjoy the show! Before the show, I of course had to head to the merchandise table to buy a few memorabilia from the show I bought a key chain (I collect Broadway Keychains!), Broadway Program Playbill, and of course the soundtrack to the musical! The show started around 2pm, and ended around 4pm. This show was super powerful and loved all the dancing and choreography. What really stood out was after the bow, at the end of the show, the cast went right back into dancing.. As soon as the show finished, I exited the theatre and headed over to the stagedoor. I waited for Becca (who danced with Teddy in the show), to come out and introduced myself. I kindly mentioned that Teddy offered to sign and get a few other cast members to sign if I left it with someone after the show. Becca kindly asked me to leave it with Security and she would get it to Teddy later that day. I was so grateful to Teddy and Becca for helping me out. As soon as I got a quick photo with Becca, I headed back towards 44th Street area to meet up with my cousin Charlotte and her dad Eric for a quick bite before the second show of the evening, “Frozen”! We met at a fun little Japanese place near 44th Street and we caught up while we enjoyed a nice dinner. My cousin Charlotte and I have been very close since she was super little. I remembered she had taken me to “Frozen” the movie, so back in November 2018 I started planning my trip with her mom and we booked our tickets pretty quickly. I was super excited to take my cousin to see her very 1st Broadway Show! After we finished eating, we walk towards The St. James Theatre, where “Frozen: The Musical” was. Last Summer, I was quickly able to say hi to all four of the girls/talented kids who were part of this musical some from the original cast. We said our goodbyes to Charlotte’s dad for a few hours and headed into the theatre. We headed to the merchandise table to purchase a few items. I picked up my Playbill/Program with some amazing photos of the original cast which came with a keychain if we bought it online (Which I did while purchasing the tickets). Well, my parents did as my “Frozen: The Musical” ticket was a Christmas Gift from my parents. I also splurged and purchased a jacket with the “Frozen: The Musical” logo on it. We headed to our seats and were amazed how incredible seats they were! This is a quick story from when I was planning my trip. My Aunt messaged me and told me about two seats that were considered partial view right behind the conductor but one of my cousins had looked it up on a website to see what the seat view looked like, and guess what? The seats were perfect! So we purchased them because they were a lot cheaper ($57.50) than what the seats around it were (around $175). Back to being present at the show. My cousin and I got to the theatre pretty early, so we sat right in the front row and took in everything around us. I wished the conductor luck before the show and the curtain went up. I was super excited. Throughout the show, I would look over at my cousin and saw a huge grin and smile on her face just in awe of the show. I loved every second of it and seeing everyone, the costumes and every detail up close made it even better! There were some amazing special affects throughout the show and the snow coming down at the end topped everything off! My cousin Charlotte and I left the theatre with huge smiles on our faces. We headed to the stagedoor and had a chance to meet a few of the cast members from the show. My cousin and I said our goodbyes, once her dad had shown up and I headed across the street for one more thing I just had to do before headed back to Penn Station. The Broadhurst Theatre, where “Anastasia” went on every night was just across the street from The St. James Theatre which I was very familiar with from last Summer. Both shows finished around the same time so I decided to go pay a visit to the stagedoor since I knew the cast members were still out there signing. I waited until most had spoken to Christy Altomare (the lead “Anya”). I went up and I had mentioned to Christy I had come last Summer to see Nicole right before she left, and ran into her backstage. She did remember and then I told I was so sorry to not see the show tonight...I mentioned the next day was my Birthday and she wished me a Happy early Birthday. I quickly then mentioned it would be super special because I had a ticket to see “Anastasia” one last time on my actual Birthday and I would be back tomorrow. Christy had the biggest smile on her face and we grabbed a quick photo before I said “see you tomorrow!” I just couldn’t wait until my Birthday. First time being away on my actual Birthday. As I headed to Penn Station, I reflected on what had happened all that day. On the way back to my Aunt and Uncle’s place, on the train, I was looking at my phone and realized it was passed Midnight and my Birthday had actually begun! With a huge grin on my face I quickly got settled back at my Aunt and Uncle’s home and fell asleep after 1am.

THURSDAY, MARCH 28TH 2019

Birthday began waking up and headed upstairs to eat a little breakfast with my Aunt and Uncle. Although I wasn’t seeing “Anastasia: The Musical” until later that night, I still wanted to get into NYC a bit earlier as I had to walk back to 48th Street to pick up my Playbill/Program from the theatre “Prom: The Musical” was. I took the train back into NYC around the same and arrived sometime after Noon. As soon as I walked out of Penn Station I walked over to Sprinkles Cupcakes to get my FREE Birthday Cupcake (My fav Salted Caramel Flavor). Then I headed to 48th Street. Teddy did more than just him signing the Playbill and had most of the cast members sign the whole front of the program! It is super special and reminded me of the memories I had made the previous day. As I walked back to 44th Street I was thinking about where I could eat for my Birthday Lunch/Dinner. I did try to meet a few friends but nothing ended up working out, so I walked over to Buca Di Beppo (on 45th Street). I got my favorite all time dish I hadn’t had in what felt like years, pasta with chicken and capers in a spicy sauce! I just felt like having something I couldn’t eat back at home and treated myself for my Birthday. After finishing up my Birthday lunch, I headed over to The Minskoff Theatre where “Lion King: The Musical” was, and met up with one of the young cast members who portrays “Young Nala” in the Musical, Suri Marrero. We had connected on Instagram, Suri had done an Instagram Takeover for my online Magazine. Suri was performing on my Birthday night as she shares the role and they each do four shows a week, but I just had to see “Anastasia” on my Birthday (You will see why later in this blog post). I did get a chance to say hi to Suri and take a few photos with her in front of the beautiful theatre. Was super fun to meet Suri in person. This was all around 5:45pm so as soon as I finished I headed back to 44th Street and The Broadhurst Theatre where “Anastasia: The Musical” was. The doors open well before the show starts so I ended up going in and just taking in this theatre for the last time. I was on the second level this time around (1st visit I was about 8 rows back in Orchestra). The view was just as great and I still had a chance to get a an amazing video of the company’s bows (There were only around four shows left after the one I attended). Right before the I got a Facetime call from my Niece and Nephew wanting to sing and wish me a Happy Birthday, the show was about to start, so instead my sister took a video and sent it to me. During intermission of the show, I quickly took a look at the video. My heart melted with my Niece and Nephew singing me Happy Birthday. I also was sitting pretty close to the upstairs merchandise table so during intermission I was able to quickly take a look at what else I wanted to purchase from the show before it closed. I decided since I was planning to the National Tour of “Anastasia” in May, I made a quick decision to get the jacket with the “Anastaisa” logo on it. It is very thin and perfect for Florida weather to bring to inside places and very lightweight. Now the weather, in NYC, was a bit colder than what I was used to, but I still insisted on wearing my jacket outside after the show finished.The show started around 7:30pm so it finished around 9:45pm. As soon as the show’s curtain was down, I headed outside to the stagedoor. After about 10-15minutes some of the cast members started making their way out of the theatre. I was able to grab quick photos with many of the cast members (unlike my first trip to “Anastasia” I really truly just took it all in the very first time). Said a quick hi to Delilah who I had just found out that day I would be seeing as “Little Anastasia” on The National Tour as well she was going to join as soon as the Broadway company had finished. I gave Deliah a special ring I purchased for her, the understudy of “Little Anastasia” Annika”, and of course Christy. I truly couldn’t wait to see Christy again and explain how much she made an impact on me the second I met her last Summer even if it was just for a quick moment. It was after 11pm when the crowd kind of got smaller and smaller (as Christy made her way to talk, sign and take photos I mean with EVERY single person waiting). That was practically two hours after the show finished Christy was still out there enjoying every moment with her fans. As Christy got closer I got a bit nervous because I sort of knew what was going to happen but was a bit unsure as she was on vocal rest the whole week to take care of her voice for the very last week of the show. Christy approached me and at first wasn’t really looking at my face because my Butterfly necklace and “Anastasia” jacket caught her eye. But she then quickly realized it was me, from the day before, and said “isn’t it your Birthday?” I had said “yes” I handed her a very special “princess” ring I had gotten for a few members of the cast in the show to remember their family at “Anastasia”. She looked at me and said “This is your Birthday and you are giving me a gift?” Christy made sure someone was actually videoing her speaking with me as she was about to do something she does for anyone who mentions it is their Birthday the day of the show. Christy first asked how old I was, and when I told her I was 31 she had was like “ No way! You look like you are 25! I want your genes!” I quickly laughed (as I get that a lot) but she didn’t and at this moment still doesn’t know the whole story. I didn’t have a chance to mention I wrote her a letter last Summer mentioning a lot. I didn’t want to keep her and left soon after she went onto the last few of the crowd. I headed back to Penn Station with this huge smile on my face and kind of starting to tear up as I watched the video a very kind fan was able to take for me of Christy singing me Happy Birthday as I headed back to my Aunt and Uncle’s home after Midnight (my usual time).

FRIDAY, MARCH 29TH 2019

I woke up and had breakfast with my Aunt and Uncle. We talked about what were planning to do that day as they wanted to celebrate my Birthday a day later since I was in NYC the whole day on my actual Birthday. We decided on seeing “Dumbo” which had just began in theatres that day. After getting ready for the day, we headed up to the movie theatre. We saw “Dumbo” and headed out to an outside mall to make a few quick stops. Then we headed to an Italian place for my Birthday dinner. Of course I loved every moment getting a chance to spend time with family and was a great end to my Birthday week in New York. We finished up dinner and headed back to my Aunt and Uncle’s place. I packed up for the week and settled in for the night. Although I ended up going upstairs and having a late night talk with one of my cousins and Aunt. We had fun talking and catching up.

SATURDAY, MARCH 30TH 2019

The next morning I had an early flight out headed back to Tampa, Florida. The plane ride home I was reflecting on my whole trip and definitely shed a few tears realizing this trip was probably one of the most memorable trips that I have ever taken. Each trip I have taken has had their moments and memories but this one was just extra special. I have no clue when my next trip will be but visiting NYC is always fun and making memories (even if it on my own) won’t stop me from doing what I love.

[neverisalongtime-ja-blog]

Chapter 32: Glasto dreams

Hello everyone! I just wanna say that the amount of love that I’m receivingfrom all of you is immeasurable and I’ll be forever grateful for that!

Also I want to invite all of you to visit @bemygetawayjz​ to read Zara’s story with Josh if you haven’t - In that case you should be ashamed of yourself - and to ask her weird shit! Say that I sent you and she’ll give you an special answer (Not really).

Remember to visit Anastasia’s IG profile:

Anastasia_Truman  ❤️️

Thanks to everyone who reads the fic, much love to you all! ♥

Read chapter 31

This leg of the tour was the one Anastasia’s was looking forward to the most; they would be traveling the South of the country to end in Florida where Anastasia was going to take advantage and make of it a small, very small, vacation. And now that the barrier between her and Josh was down, she was so excited about this new adventure, it was going to be like the old times.

She was wishful about the Josh situation; even though she said she wasn’t going to put her hopes up, but Josh kept texting her and they talked until late those two nights before traveling to Washington, DC for the show. The two bands traveled apart this time. Dead Curse arrived to DC earlier so the four bandmates decided to have a day together, visiting some historic sites like the Smithsonian, and other common touristic sites. Then, they went to some music stores and ended up at a bar near the hotel.

Next day, they were the first to get to the venue. Anastasia hadn’t seen Josh yet, but walking through the stadium she stumbled upon Anthony and Chad talking in front of the stage.

 -          Here we go again –She said to Chad and Tony – This “two weeks on, two weeks off” thing is killing me, man.

-          When you have a family you will understand – Chad said smiling.

-          You are part of the Josh club – Anthony said surprising Anastasia.

-          How come? – She asked.

-          He doesn’t like this schedule neither – Anthony answered – Hey, did you take pictures of us in Venice?

-          Of course – Anastasia replied.

-          Can I see them to see if we can post some on our social media? – He asked again and Anastasia handled him her phone.

-          You choose.

 She continued talking to Chad while Anthony checked trough her phone, then he gave it back to her and they walked together through the backstage area to a common room, where Josh was practicing and Flea was there teaching some bass lines to Mandy. She was thrilled to be there as Anastasia could see. As soon as Josh saw her, he put his guitar away and walked towards her to give her a big hug, she responded with a smile. Anthony walked to a couch and took his phone out while he kept talking to Chad.

 -          Did you bring your new guitar? – Josh asked Anastasia, grabbing his pink Fender 1960 Relic Stratocaster back.

-          Of course! I’, even gonna play it on some songs – She answered.

-          That sounds awesome – He said with a proud smile.

 In that moment a phone started to ring, but the ringtone was the Dark Necessities song.

 -          How much of a narcissist do you need to be to have your own song as a ringtone? – Mandy said laughing.

 The song kept going off but nobody picked up the phone.

 -          Somebody needs to pick that up – Anastasia said, and in that moment she felt a vibration inside the left back pocket of her jeans, that was weird because that wasn’t her ringtone. Sara by Fleetwood Mac was her ringtone.

 The song went off again. At that point Anastasia grabbed her phone and realize it was her own iPhone ringing, and in the screen she could see that Anthony was calling, her eye roll must have been huge because Anthony started to laugh loud.

 -          God! I give you my phone to check a picture for ten seconds and you change my ringtone? – Everybody in the room was laughing at this point – You are such a child.

-          Look at your screen background – Anthony said and she did it, a Josh picture was her new background. It was him smiling in the floor, holding a guitar in black and white.

-          You are such a child! – Anastasia said laughing too. Josh grabbed her phone.

-          It’s a nice picture – He said smiling as a joke.

-          Listen! – Tony spoke up again – We noticed yesterday that you sing the chorus on The Getaway and we haven’t performed it together during this tour! Would you like to join us on stage tonight?

-          Wow! – She was in shock – That would be cool! Do we need to rehearse or something?

-          That’s the other part of the surprise! – Chad talked this time – We have a couple of interviews so I don’t think we’ll get the chance to rehearse it.

-          Nice – Anastasia put a fake smile on her face.

-          You already know your part – Josh said – You helped build that song.

-          Well… I like extreme shit, so let’s do it!

 The Getaway was the third song on the Red Hot Chili Peppers setlist that night, so she waited at a side of the stage where nobody was allowed to be except the crew and sound engineers. That place from where she always watched Josh play, she just stood there until Anthony mentioned her name.

 -          For the next song I would like to bring up here someone special. She is like a niece to me and so is for everybody on this band, well, almost everybody – “He had to say that”, Anastasia thought – And she helped bring this next song to life, so please give it up for my favorite girl in the world, Anastasia Truman! – Anthony said and the whole venue burst into cheers and applauses.

 She smiled and took the stage, and as soon as she walked out she felt someone holding her. It was Josh, giving her a big hug from behind, she tried to hold herself together and walked to Flea’s side of the stage where he gave her a hug too. She only sang the chorus on the song and some harmonies so she decided it was best to just jump on top of Flea’s amps and sit there, once in a while she shared a smile with Chad or Anthony come closer to sing some parts to her, by the middle of the song she was so hyped she got off the amplifiers and walked next to Anthony but Josh turned her around and while she was singing the last chorus he had the brilliant idea to join his forehead with hers. That caught her by surprise and she didn’t know what to do except to follow his lead. She smiled and for the end of the song (which was sang by Tony and her at the same time), she decided to stand next to Anthony again. He thanked her for joining the band for that song, she said “thank you” to the crowd and before leaving she felt Josh’s arms around her again.

 -          That was a weird attitude from Josh last night – Mandy told Anastasia while they were getting ready to leave for the next city, Atlanta, the morning after the show.

-          I know, he was so loving on that stage – Anastasia said with a smile – But – She changed her expression – I woke up with this knot on my stomach today, like if something is going to happen.

-          Really?

-          Yes, I don’t know – Anastasia closed her suitcase – It’s probably nothing.

 They traveled alone again. When they landed in Atlanta, they went straight to their hotel rooms. Josh hadn’t texted Anastasia since the night before, so she wasn’t sure if he was in town yet. She went to sleep feeling the knot on her stomach and woke up next day with the same feeling. She knew something was going to happen.

Mandy wanted to wander around the city a little bit so she, Nick and Anastasia went to have lunch to a Southern cuisine restaurant where everything was fried, that grease filled An’s heart. Greasy food was the best! And this tour was making her gain a few pounds but she was having so much fun she didn’t focus on that. Tour had been great thus far, she was so thankful.

After eating such a huge amount of fried chicken, the three Dead Curse members made their biggest effort into walking to the venue. They were going to play a song for the first time that night, so Nick wanted to do a short sound check. Anastasia was sensing a bad feeling while she was approaching the Philips Arena, they entered through the backstage door and walked to the stage where Nick grabbed his guitar, and after planning with some engineers they started soundchecking. They song only required voice and guitar, it was a ballad and it was probably the first time they ever performed a ballad, but it was one of Nick’s favorite songs from their last album and he really wanted to play it.

 -          That song is beautiful – A shirtless Anthony said to her when she walked out the stage – Your songwriting is so good. I’m jealous!

-          Don’t worry “Ding, dang, dong, dong, deng, deng, dong, dong, ding, dang” is still one of the best lyrics ever written in music history, and nobody can’t take that away from you – Anastasia said smiling sarcastically.

-          Oh my God, An! – Mandy interrupted the conversation trying to catch a breath because she was obviously running but before saying anything she looked at Anthony for a second – If someone would have told me I was going to deal with so many old shirtless dudes on this tour…

-          What the fuck is wrong with you two today? – Anthony said laughing.

-          Back to you – She looked at Anastasia again – I have to tell you before you find out and it gets worse – Mandy took a deep breath – Lauren’s here – Anastasia’s heart stopped.

-          Man! That Josh is so stupid sometimes – Anthony said – Are you ok? – He asked Anastasia.

-          No – She answered – But I’ll be.

 She lied. She wasn’t going to be fine. This was a sick joke from the Universe or from Josh. What was she doing here? After Josh denied her as his girlfriend? Her world collapsed in a second and she felt sick. That was why she had that knot on her stomach, she sensed it. She wanted to avoid him, avoid her and avoid them. Mandy grabbed her and took her to their dressing room as fast as she could.

 -          This is a neverending thing – Eric said when the girls arrived to their dressing room.

-          I need to make this stop – Anastasia said – It’s my fault, I fell for him as I fall for him every damn time I see him. I thought this time it would be different but no. It’s my fault.

-          It’s not your fault – Eric talked again – You love him and you can’t control that, and…

-          Don’t dare tell me he loves me – Anastasia said before he could finish his sentence.

-          I think you need to be alone – Eric said walking to the door and grabbing Mandy.

-          But… - Mandy said

-          It’s true. I just need to be alone for a few minutes. Let me breathe, break some things and I’ll catch up with you later.

 Mandy walked out reluctantly, followed by Eric who closed the door behind him.

Anastasia took a look at herself in the mirror. She promised herself she wasn’t going to fall again and there she was, compressing all her anger on her throat as her eyes became watery, she wanted to scream but the pain didn’t leave any space for energy, so she threw herself in a big white sofa. She fell down next to her purse and took a look inside, and there she saw it: a box of Xanax. She hadn’t taken one in so long, years probably (she battled a little addiction to them about ten years ago and after that she never took another pill), but she always kept a box near, nobody knew about that, she never said a thing because it would piss everybody off, but ever since, she never felt the desire to fall in that again… until then. She felt defeated, lonely and so sad, and on top of that she had a show to perform in a few hours. She sat up and grabbed the box and without even thinking about it she popped one pill. She got up to look for some water but there wasn’t any near, instead she found a vodka bottle and by then she didn’t gave a fuck about collateral effects, she looked at herself in the mirror one more time feeling so disgusted with who she was at the moment and swallowed the pill with a shot of vodka, straight from the bottle. She looked at herself one more time and grabbed another pill to repeat the procedure. She sat on the floor, her eyes still watery but she wasn’t able to cry.

Anastasia lost track of time, and she just sat there waiting for the drug to kick in when she heard a knock on the door. By then the Xanax had done its thing and it was hard for her to move but she managed to get to the door and opened, Carl was on the other side.

 -          Are you ok? – He asked.

-          I’ll be in a moment – She answered.

-          I need you in the meeting room, I have something to discuss with you guys – Carl said.

-          I hope it makes my day better.

-          Oh, it’s gonna make your whole life better – He said smiling.

 They walked together to the meeting room. Anastasia was looking at the floor the whole time, she didn’t want to see anything or anybody. Once they arrived, Mandy, Nick and Eric where already there, sitting around a large black table. Anastasia took a chair next to Mandy.

 -          So I have great news, like the best news – Carl said. He was showing such an excitement.

-          Please, enlighten us! – Mandy said.

-          I managed to get you guys a spot in Glastonbury this year – Carl said with an exaggerated smile.

-          We already been to Glasto – Anastasia said.

-          Yes, playing at 4 o’clock – He talked again – But this time you’ll be headlining fucking Saturday in Glasto! – Anastasia’s eyes opened big

-          Wait, what? – Eric said trying to contain his smile.

-          You’ll be headlining Glastonbury in June!

-          OH MY GOD, CARL! – Mandy screamed and got up her chair to jump on Carl’s arms – Did you guys hear that?

 Anastasia was trying to process the information. When they started Dead Curse they did it as a way to express themselves and play music which was something they all loved to do, they never had any expectations to where this journey would lead them, but headlining Glastonbury was something she always dreamed about. It was her favorite festival in her homeland, and now she would have the opportunity to headline it. Dead Curse’s name would be among other big names in music like Radiohead, David Bowie, The Smiths, Oasis and many more. It was a dream come true for her.

 -          It’s a dream come true – She wanted to scream and jump and dance but the Xanax and vodka mix was on full effect and she couldn’t move her body.

-          Do you feel okay? – Carl asked her.

-          Yes. I just need to sleep for about an hour – She said getting up with difficulty – Can I do that?

-          Be my guest – Carl said.

 She left her bandmates celebrating and walked back to her dressing room but on the way she fronted Josh.

 -          Hey! I heard about Glasto, congrats – He said with a smile.

-          I can’t deal with you right now, please let me through – His smile automatically faded and he didn’t try to stop Anastasia – You know? – She said a few steps away and he turned to see her – When you’re done playing with this girl and get ready to hang with a woman then we’ll talk – Xanax made her honest. He didn’t answer.

 She was feeling a windwhirl of emotions at that moment: sad because of Josh, angry with herself for being so stupid and extremely happy because she was achieving a longtime goal. She rested her head on the sofa and without thinking about it she fell asleep.

Within an hour for the show, Mandy woke An up and then helped her get ready to perform. On a quick meeting before taking the stage Anastasia decided to add a cover to their set list, it was a song that all of them knew well so nobody had a problem with it.

It was Fleetwood Mac’s Silver Springs. She took the Stratocaster Josh gave her for her birthday and started to play and sing.

 I'll begin not to love you

Turn around, see me runnin'

I'll say I loved you years ago

Tell myself you never loved me, no

And did you say she was pretty

And did you say that she loves you

Baby, I don't wanna know

Oh, no

And can you tell me was it worth it

Really, I don't wanna know

 She noticed Lauren and Josh at a side of the stage, he was looking at her with a mix of regret and love in his eyes, maybe it was the Xanax but at that moment she didn’t care what the hell he was feeling.

 Time casts a spell on you, but you won't forget me

I know I could have loved you, but you would not let me

 She looked straight into Josh’s eyes at that moment. And Lauren noticed it because she looked at both, confused. But once again: she didn’t give a fuck about it. She was returning the favor to Josh, as he sang Landslide for her a couple of weeks ago but with a lot more revenge on it, this time.

Then it was time for the song they practiced that afternoon, she announced to the crowd that it was the first time they would play it live and everybody cheered.

 It's been so long between the words we spoke

Will you be there up on the shore, I hope

You wonder why it is that I came home

I figured out where I belong

 It was a song called Long and Lost that she wrote after breaking up with Valentine but it seemed so valid and relatable at the moment.

 But it's too late to come on home

Are all those bridges now old stone?

But it's too late to come on home

Can the city forgive? I hear it’s sad song

Read chapter 33

Disclaimer: as I always tell you I have not a tiny bit of talent to write songs so I use some that have been already written, the one in this chapter is “Long and Lost” by Florence and The Machine. Such a beautiful song.

And now I give you “Silver Srpings” by Fleetwood Mac. Ultimate favorite. Any Fleetwood Mac fans out there?

[neverisalongtime-ja-blog]

Chapter 16: Back to normality

Hello beautiful people of Tumblr and other social media, is Thursday again and I’ll leave you with chapter 16.

I know that maybe this chapter is a little bit “Blah” but next chapter is super good!

Remember that I’ll be posting short stories that complement in a way the fic on Anastasia’s Instagram profile. The first one is about Mandy!

Anastasia_Truman

Much love to you all! ❤️️

——————————————————

Read chapter 15

Everything was going well and getting back to normality. Anastasia was enjoying her relationship to the fullest. They had just two weeks before heading back to Europe to continue the tour so they tried to take advantage of every day in LA as much as they could.

One afternoon, Josh invited Anastasia to one of his favorite restaurants. Surprisingly it was a Brazilian food place. He said to her that he ate there at least twice a month.

-          It’s a nice surprise that you like Brazilian food – Anastasia said while drinking a mixed juice.

-          I love Brazil. I have so many memories from my travels there.

-          Good memories?

-          Amazing memories – Josh answered and she did’t want to go further with the subject.

-          I’m so happy because my father is in town! – Anastasia said clapping low.

-          Really?

-          Yes, he landed last night and is in Malibu right now. I would love you to meet him – Josh looked at her with a stoic expression on his face.

-          Wow… I would love that – Josh smiled – Are you sure?

-          Yes! My father is amazing and super cool.

-          Meeting the parents, huh?

-          That worries you?

-          No, it excites me.

-          You already know Barbara and she is like my mother. Mark is gonna be there too.

-          When is it?

-          Tonight – Anastasia said trying not to look into his eyes.

-          TONIGHT? – Josh raised his voice.

-          Sorry to tell you last minute. We can go to my house and get ready there – At this point Josh had clothes in Anastasia’s house and Anastasia has some of hers at Josh’s place.

-          All right, I accept the invitation – Anastasia always shared a small laugh when Josh used formal sentences.

The two arrived at her house, as they planned to, and after watching some TV the two fell asleep. Sleep wasn’t something you get to do a lot on tours so every chance they had, they didn’t even think about it. Anastasia woke up by the sound of her phone, opened her eyes and saw Josh sleeping next to her, it was the most comforting view she had had in a while. Anastasia rolled over trying to take her phone and not wake up Josh in the process. She received a message from her sister Barbara.

“Are you coming or what?”

She saw the time and it was late, very late. She moved Josh's arm tenderly first and he didn’t respond, she moved it again, nothing happened, then she called his name softly, but he was still fully asleep. She was getting frustrated.

-          Josh! – She called his name loud and moved his arm violently.

-          What’s up? – He asked opening his eyes big and fast.

-          It’s late- Anastasia said with a soft voice and smiling.

-          No – Josh said with sleepy voice – Let’s stay here.

He rolled over to get almost on top of Anastasia, and he started to kiss her neck. God! She loved his neck kisses; he kissed her shoulders and then her lips to end with a little bite, which turned her on. She kissed him back fiercely and scratched his back, now he was turned on, she could feel it. Anastasia began to breathe heavily, he started to tease her touching her belly and then going down with his fingertips, she was in heaven and he knew it. She bit her lip and he smiled and then, suddenly, he stopped, he got his face close to hers and whispered “It’s late” before getting up from the bed.

-          Are you serious? – Anastasia still breathing heavy for the rush and rage.

-          Come on! It’s late – He was laughing and enjoying the moment, thinking it was funny.

-          I’m gonna get my revenge Josh Adam Klinghoffer. I swear.

-          Oh yeah?

-          It won’t be pretty – Josh disappeared behind the bathroom door still laughing.

They arrived at Barbara’s mansion an hour late. She received them at the door.

-          Hi Josh – She saluted him with a kiss in the cheek and a hug. Then she turned to Anastasia and put an angry face - I'm mad at you. I’m starving.

-          I’m sorry – Anastasia said.

-          I’m sure you are late for inducing Josh into spontaneous sex.

-          WHAT? – Anastasia said opening her mouth disgusted – It wasn’t exactly like that – She looked at Josh who was laughing.

They walked to the living room where the rest of the family was waiting for them. Her brother, Mark, was playing with the twins and her father got up from his chair as soon as he saw her. Her father was old but invigorated, his skin was wrinkled and his brown hair hung loose over his shoulders, his blue eyes showed the perks of the age and his skinny body showed hints of his drug addiction past. Regardless, her father was full of life. His eyes shone as soon as he saw Anastasia and hugged her tightly. Despite the relationship with her mother, Nick always had showed careless love for her. After the hug, she introduced Josh to him. Josh was nervous but tried to remain calm, he wasn’t a guy who was often starstruck, he had played with such world-famous people that it was almost routinary for him, but Nick Truman was an institution in rock music and now his girlfriend’s father. Anastasia smiled imagine what was going through Josh's mind.

-          I’m glad to finally meet you – Nick said – These three – pointing to Anastasia, Barbara and Mark – had nothing but great things to say about you.

-          I’m happy to know that – Anastasia, Mark and Barbara were smiling in an exaggerated way at Josh, like making fun of the situation. He smiled back.

-          Sorry for the delay but you know how I am, always late! – Anastasia said.

-          We want to eat! – The twins screamed.

-          Well the Queen and King had spoken! We better get to the table.

                                                         °°° 

-          I would congratulate you for the food but I know you didn’t cook any of it – Anastasia said to her sister occupying a chair on the right side. Josh seated next to her and her brother on the head of the table while on the opposite side was Barbara. The twins and Nick took chairs on the left side.

-          A special occasion needs special food – Barbara said – Josh, if you are a vegetarian those broccoli nuggets are delicious.

-          No, I’m not – Josh said with a shy expression on his face – But I’ll give them a try.

-          Wow a Californian guy that eats meat, that’s a first – Mark said joking with Josh.

-          I couldn’t date a vegetarian guy – Anastasia said.

-          Yes, we all know how much you like meat, especially all kinds of sausages – Barbara said to her sister with an obvious double meaning, smirking.

-          I really hope you choke on those broccoli nuggets – Anastasia did not found her sister joke funny – She is lying – She said to Josh.

-          What? She just said you liked sausages – Josh and Barbara shared a look of complicity and everyone laughed, everyone but Anastasia, of course. “Josh is funny today”, she thought and remembered she owned him revenge.

After the dinner, the twins were falling asleep so they said goodbye to everyone, including “Uncle Josh” which put a big smile on Josh’s face. Barbara put them to sleep in their bed. She came back to the table to continue the conversation.

-          So you are touring right now? – Nick asked drinking his glass of wine.

-          Yes, we leave on Thursday to… wherever the hell we are going next – Anastasia couldn’t remember where they were heading to.

-          To Germany – Josh said smiling a bit.

-          Yes! To Munich! – Anastasia said sharing the smile.

-          I’m so proud of you, you have no idea – Her father said – I checked out some tunes from your own band, how was it called?

-          Dot Hacker, dad – Anastasia answered.

-          That, Dot Hacker, An send me some songs about a month ago and I must say I was pleased. You guys have a unique melody. Those tunes restored my faith in music – Josh was speechless.

-          Hearing that from you, sir, is such an honor.

-          Oh stop the formality, don’t call me sir, call me Nick – Josh smiled again.

-          He is so talented – Anastasia said and put her right hand in Josh’s left inner thigh.

He looked at her with fear and remembered she was going to get revenge for the episode at her house. Josh smiled and Anastasia smiled back at him.

-          And are you having fun? You aren’t drinking a lot, right? – Nick said to Anastasia.

-          Come on, you say it like I was some kind of alcoholic – Anastasia moved her hand close to Josh’s genital area. She could feel him tensing his muscles and that gave her a reason to laugh a little bit. The table had a long tablecloth so everyone was ignoring what was happening underneath.

-          I’m not saying that but I know you, you are my daughter – Anastasia rolled her eyes – Are you going to visit London?

-          Yes, at the end of the year.

Anastasia didn’t stop teasing and pleasing Josh and he had to be a total actor to not show his nervousness. She just kept touching him up and down, up and down... He couldn’t tell her to stop but he tried to let her know with his eyes, she just smiled and laid her torso to Josh’s side, while he put his left arm around her shoulders and began to pinch her slightly. She was all the way and started to feel the pressure in Josh pants, even underneath their bagginess. She smiled at Josh with satisfaction and took advantage of a moment of distraction of her relatives to whisper to him “I told you I would have my revenge”. Josh faked a smile and excused himself to the bathroom… the ugly part of being a guy.

-          He drank so much water today – Anastasia said to her family laughing and feeling almighty.

-          You should visit your mother when you get to London.

-          I will see… - Anastasia answered looking to the table – I’m going to London to play in front of thousands of people, I don’t want my mother’s bad energy around.

-          An… Don’t talk like that.

-          Don’t you come and tell me how I should I talk about my mother – Anastasia said disgusted.

                                                      °°°

-          You are crazy and I love you – Josh said getting inside his car.

-          That will teach you to think twice the next time you tease me and don’t finish the job.

-          The thing between you and your mom is that bad? – Josh had a special talent to change subjects abruptly.

-          I wouldn’t say it’s bad, I would say it’s null – Anastasia looked at the road through the windshield.

-          Are you going to see her in London? – Josh asked.

-          I guess so. I didn’t even call her when we were there the last time. It’s my mom after all.

-          Eric’s birthday is tomorrow – Josh changed subjects again.

-          I know! – Anastasia said looking at him – We are going to a new restaurant in Silver Lake.

-          I’m excited for you to hang out with my friends… my nice friends.

-          And you forget that many of them are my friends too.

-          Right, how didn’t we get together sooner? We had many people in common.

-          Everything happens when it has to happen.

Anastasia stroked Josh's cheek with the back of her hand and moved her fingers behind his ear and his neck.

-          Are you teasing me again? – Josh asked without taking his eyes off the road.

-          I hope this time it leads me somewhere – Josh looked at her.

She moved her body towards Josh and kissed his neck and his jaw line, the same jaw line that drove her crazy.

-          I’m driving – Josh said smiling with mischief – We can crash and die.

-          I’ll die happily – Anastasia responded.

She continued stroking Josh through every inch of his torso, head, thighs and everything in between. Josh used his right hand and arm to please Anastasia, thanking God for automatic transmission cars. He parked his car at the porch of his house and both of them were so full of desire that he couldn’t wait more and own her right there, inside his car. It was late and he lived in a gated community but the fact of getting caught turn them on even more. She spared no shouts of pleasure, something that Josh loved.

Read chapter 17