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deliciousangelfestival · 3 years ago

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xWicked Romance : Chapter 4 : He’s cute.

Character : Mob!Steve Rogers x Retired Assassin Female Reader

Summary : Steve was hoping to meet the right one until he met her. But is he ready to be with her? He thought his life already dark because of his job. He wouldn’t able to find a woman that strong enough to face the hardship to stand beside him. Turn out his life is nothing compared to her.

Warning : No smuts, since I don’t know how to write it. Peace y’all.

Steve woke up because he felt someone softly brushing his hair. He opened his eyes, finding her hand stopped. Both of them are lying on his bed.

Her head still laying on his arm, he move her body closer to feel her warmth. He bury his head into the crook of her neck and mumbled "Don't stop."

“That’s a nice way to wake me up.” His voice sounded deeper and raspy.

(Y/N) chuckled softly when she heard his voice. “You’re too excited last night.”

She suddenly turned her body and jumped off the bed.

“Where are you going?” Steve was surprised that she's easily escape from his arms.

“Stay there; I’ll be back.”

When she left the room, Steve noticed she was wearing his shirt and boxer.

The smell of bacon and pancakes made him look at his door. She came in, bringing a tray filled with food, a glass of water, egg, bacon, pancake, and coffee. It's been a while since he had breakfast in his own house.

Steve is confused if today is his birthday or not? He never got pampered like this. Usually, it was him the one who did this kind of thing. Not the other way around.

He sat up, the blanket only covering his waist this time. (Y/N) gently put the food tray on his lap. She saw Steve had a confused expression on his face.

“You need a big breakfast to start your day.” (Y/N) said.

“How did you manage to do all of this?” Steve asked after he finished drinking water.

“Because I woke up too early. I made breakfast for both of us.” (Y/N) said, walking in with another tray of foods. She sat beside him and kissed his side lips. “You completely tired me out last night.”

Steve gave a loud laugh; he never could imagine a girl like (Y/N) not just brave but also good at cooking. He didn’t notice she was able to slip out from his arm. Because of his habit he got from the military, Steve could get awake so easily even with a small voice and movement.

Both of them enjoy their breakfast together, a few dirty jokes there but not much since it’s still early in the morning. After that, they have another hot session in the bathroom. (snu snu time.)

The time they spent together (Y/N) told Steve he is free to ask anything from her. She’s pretty sure if she tells him everything about how she grows up, he wouldn’t believe any word that came out of her mouth.

Steve doesn’t mind it; he prefers her life to be mysterious. She never failed to give him a surprise. He likes her spontaneity. Perhaps some day she could give him a heart attack.

While they put on their clothes (Y/N) phone vibrates with a pop message from Peter saying he’s downstairs to pick her up.

“Do you have to go?”

Steve felt the time was not enough when she told him that she needed to go.

“Come on, just stay a bit more,” Steve asked her with a pleading tone. He holds her wrist when she is ready to go out. (Y/N) saw his puppy eyes couldn’t help blurting out, “So cute.”

Steve get worried; no one would dare to call him the mafia boss cute. At the moment, he questioned his masculinity. In which part she saw him cute.

“I have too.” Her finger caressed his cheeks and touched his beard. “Let’s have dinner tonight. Okay?”

Steve answered, “Alright, see you tonight.” Before he released her, he gave a surprise kiss on her lips.

With hazy eyes, he pulls away while (Y/N) is still shocked with the kissed “Wow.”

Steve chuckled and winked at her. “That’s a sneak peek for tonight.”

(Y/N) smiled, she doesn’t want to light a fire from Steve. She closed the door and left the house.

When she walked out, (Y/N) saw two older couples get out of a car. She knew who it was. They are Steve’s mother, Sarah Rogers, and the former mafia boss Joseph Rogers.

She looks at them as a couple; they look lovely together. But (Y/N) noticed when Sarah looked at her, she became a scary mother in law like on the TV.

Sarah walk like a lady and stop infront of her. She told (Y/N), “Listen carefully. Regardless of what happens between you two. I can’t accept you. I know you are different from any other woman. Even if you can stop Brock with just one bullet, I’m not going to let some girl use my son again.”

After she said her words, Sarah turned and left (Y/N) alone while Joseph finally followed her.

Sarah walks too fast; she turns and talks to her husband, “Is she still looking?”

Joseph glanced through his shoulder “Yeah, and she’s waving at us.”

Sarah was bewildered. “What kind of woman Steve got into this time?” She thought the woman would get angry, but it turned out she’s still there and waved at them.

“First, it’s a C.I.A then a journalist. Now what?” Sarah sighed.

Joseph also feels the same way as his wife. Their son picks a girl that always reveals their business. It’s pretty funny seeing his wife getting so worked up.

“Alright, don’t get mad. Let’s meet our son.” Joseph hugged his wife's shoulder.

When the bell rang, Steve hoped it's (Y/N) the one who stands in front of his door. He didn’t even check the monitor; he quickly opened the door.

"You're back…." Steve didn’t even finish his speech. His smile dropped when he saw his parents.

"Stevie." Sarah hugs him.

"Mom? Dad? What are you- AHHH!!!”

Steve hissed when his mother pinched his chest. He looked at his father with a look of ‘What’s all that about?’

Joseph answered, “We met her when we arrived.”

Steve finally understands why his mother became moody this morning.

“I can see why you like her. She seems different.” Joseph whispered at his son while Steve nodded all the time.

Sarah suddenly jumped in. “Are you sure she’s good for you? What’s her job? Please don’t tell me she’s a lawyer or a judge?”

Steve patted her back to calm her down. “Mom, calm down; I’m not dating from that side this time. She’s an analyst in automotive for a private company.”

“Ooh, that explains the nice car,” Joseph murmured. Sarah glared at her husband.

“I hope you don’t get a heartbreak this time.” Sarah felt pity towards her son, Steve could be scary when he’s mad, but when he’s sad, he looks like a golden retriever puppy.

He understands why his mother asked him this cause she saw how broken he was when his relationship ended with Peggy.

####

From day one, they have obstacles because of their jobs. Peggy stands to abide by the law while he already saw how corrupt and hypocritical the government is. He saw his comrade die for nothing.

His world almost crumbled when he found out that Peggy was ready to put his family into jail. And the most hurtful thing is that she did that to get a promotion.

'What am I to you?' He asked her this question. She was unable to give him the answer.

####

But behind the thunder, there’s a rainbow; his mother, Sarah, she used to not give a damn about what Steve and her husband did in mobster stuff. When she found out her son got used, she went livid.

She told her son to make them regret treating him like that. Sarah knows her son is a mobster, his life is always related to dark stuff, but he always makes sure to treat his own woman like a queen.

And right now, he knew he moved too fast with (Y/N), but he felt like she shares the same value with him.

In the afternoon, Steve is in the car with Sam and Bucky. They’re heading to the hospital right now.

Steve was looking at the window; he could see his reflection. He suddenly remembered what (Y/N) said in the morning, “Guys.”

Bucky and Sam ‘Hmmm’ at the same time.

“Do I look cute?”

Sam stops the car abruptly. Suddenly everything became silent. While Bucky cursed, “What the f#%* Steve?”

“Alright, the answer is pretty clear.” Steve scoffed, he doesn’t want to continue; their reaction is enough for him.

Sam and Bucky are confused because their friend just asks them nonsense questions.

“Well, we have arrived,” Sam said; he looked at Bucky. “You follow him; I will stay here. Make sure he doesn't get plastic surgery.”

Steve rolled his eyes and got out of the car with Bucky.

“Is she the one who said you’re cute?”

Steve nodded.

“Hmm, you completely whipped. Well Steve, I completely understand,” Bucky tells him they’re in the same position since he’s with Natasha.

Both of them stopped at the V.I.P patient room. They saw two bodyguards standing in front of the door. The bodyguard steps away when Steve approaches them. One of the bodyguards opened the door for him.

Steve turns to Bucky. “Wait here.”

“Sure.”

Steve walked into the room; he thought Brock still fainted. It turns out he’s awake and eating.

Brock was wearing a neck brace, his two legs wrapped in a cast, his left arm also wrapped in a cast, and his elbow fractured.

Brock lifted his head when he saw Steve. He clicked his tongue.

“Your girlfriend almost killed me.”’

“Huh?” Steve responded.

Steve didn’t know that (Y/N) visited Brock before him.

####

What happened 4 hours ago

It was Peter who picked up (Y/N) at Steve’s place with her car.

She gets into the car and puts on her seatbelt. “Let’s go back to my apartment first; I need to change my clothes. I have to meet someone later.”

“Who?”

“A friend, he got into an accident last night.”

“Hmm.”

When they arrived at her place, Peter asked, “Let me guess your sick friend is Brock?”

“Yes.”

Peter shook his head. “Poor guy.”

At the hospital.

Brock is feeling drowsy because of the painkiller. Because of the car crash, his neck got the impact.

He saw a shadow figure in front of him, “You!!!”

“Good afternoon Rumlow.”

“Hmph!!!” Brock wants to strangle her; he remembered her from last night.

(Y/N) walked closer to his infusion bottle; she took out something from her pocket.

“Wha--”

“You see, Rumlow, I kinda like Steve, but the Tom & Jerry fight between you and him has to stop. I don’t want you to appear and ruined the romantic moment like last night.”

Brock finally could see what she’s holding in her hand. (Y/N) notices he is looking at the syringe that she has.

“What inside this syringe could put you to sleep forever. You know what I’m capable of, right?”

Brock cursed, “#$%^*!!!”

(Y/N) nodded. “Correct, so if you still want to leave, just stay 1 million km from us, okay?”

Brock defeatedly answered, “Okay.”

“Great, go back to rest.” She opens the cap of the syringe and injects it into his infusion bottle.

“Bi*$#!!”

“Relax, it’s just another painkiller for you.” After she said that, Brock eventually fell asleep.

When he woke up, his bodyguard gave him a food container with a small note 'I'm sorry, she’s pretty scary.'

####

Back to the present

“Really?” Steve was astounded.

“Your new girl is crazy.” Brock clicked his tongue. He can’t imagine having a girlfriend like (Y/N).

In Steve’s mind, her threat towards Brock is nothing. His heart fluttered when he knew what she did for him. Never in his life, a woman would threaten his rival for him. He never get spoiled like this.

Steve chuckled; he got up from the chair and mumbled on the way out of the hospital ward, remembering what (Y/N) had done for him “My cute devil.”

He finds it cute, though; he never had a brave enough girlfriend to threaten his rival. He used to be the one who protects his girl.

Steve wants to meet her again; lucky for him, she texts him first and gives her location.

Steve arrived at the high-end restaurant that, even for him, it’s difficult to book a table. She won’t stop giving him a surprise. He saw her wearing a dress that fitted her figure. She looked beautiful and confident.

“(Y/N).”

(Y/N) raised her face gently, the corner of her lips moving upward when she saw him.

Steve felt like he could drown in it. Both of them had dinner together. While they’re eating, he needs to say something important to her. They were having wine when he grasps her hand. It made her look at him.

He has to say it to give her the chance to walk away “(Y/N); I like you. I feel a connection between us. But being with me means sometimes you will be facing unexpected things. I know you are strong, but I don’t want you to get hurt.”

She tilted her head a little and looked at Steve in front of her. She pinched his chin lightly. “Steve, I don’t care how many enemies you have.”

“I will kill them one by one.”

She wasn’t saying a flirty line towards him instead of a deadly one. Everyone said she’s scary, but for him, she’s a great blessing in his life.

“You know that I’m capable. I don’t mind working as your partner. Not just as your girlfriend.”

‘Thump!’ Steve's heart fluttered when he heard that word.

“Girlfriend?”

“You don’t want to?” (Y/N) raised her eyebrows.

Steve quickly answered, “Please be my girlfriend.” It would be crazy to decline it; he wants to show the world that she belongs to him. He’s afraid if he’s too late, she will slip away from his finger. To put it more plainly, Steve may not have met another woman like (Y/N).

A/N: Thank you for the likes and reblogged my post.

To my followers and people who liked my post, I hope you don’t mind if I tag your name:

Tag:

@samwinter09

@colorfulpeachpurseghost

@marce170018

@stepheewdgirlie

@juliealma1

@valhalla-kristin

@fivebefore21

@iloveshawnieboi

@sarahbellesaurus

@kesyakesh

@xkarmenvlx

@jemimah-b99

#mob!steve rogers x reader #Marvel AU #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x y/n #mob!steve #Steve Rogers

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desire-tenderness · 4 years ago

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𝒜𝑣𝑒𝑐 𝑎𝑚𝑜𝑢𝑟, 𝒯𝑖𝑚𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑒.

14 January 2021,

Hello my love, I hope you’re well. I have written much more often than before. When we are energized or distressed, it flows perfectly. And, well, I’m here in my room writing you a letter. Barefoot, to contrast the warmth I feel after drinking two glasses of Negroni, while listening to a song, Jardin D'Iver. "Ta robe à fleur Sous la pluie de novembre Mes mains qui courent Je n'en peux plus de t'attendre" I want to thank you for giving us space so we could talk in October last year. Jack has been a great friend to me, it’s good to have him around. I’m sure he opened up this space for you to hear me. I need to thank him for taking care of you, he told me how things are going. You’re such a strong woman, Lily; so amazing. Life is a school, we need to go through situations to learn how it works. It’s I know, sometimes I sound like an old man talking, damn it. I’m still sorry for all the pain and chaos involving your father, that sucks. You know you have me to talk to about anything. I wish I could hug her or at least see her smile, even from afar. Are you reading? As a religious man, I ask God to. Remember how we were in September 2019? When I said those days on Capri were the best days of my life, it wasn’t and never will be. I remember every second, every detail, every smell, taste, or feeling. Fucking Lily, this shit was so real to us.

When it was all over, the emptiness filled me for long days, months, it’s true.. I’m wrong, I’m flawed in many ways. Many times I get tired of the image that they built for me and it made me lose heart in June last year, I am not proud, but I should not condemn myself. I was not happy, I was in disgrace on the inside. I care a lot about these things. But I would never want my care to be misinterpreted. I’m just a guy trying to be the best for my family, my career, my friends, the best for me, the best for you. But I always look like Weird Chalamet, the guy who’s super dedicated to his work, clumsy and smug. But all the moments I spent beside him I could truly see and feel the boy I carry inside, who I am without fear or fear. My best version of it. Lily, my heart is wild, it’s human. Once you told me that I have a perfect soul, would I have failed you if that were true?

In that house, alone, in the middle of the vast green at Woodstock I could reflect so much, you have no idea. I needed it, my chest caught fire from the inside. Capturing the essence of a Dylan of my own, my version, it brought me contradictory thoughts about what I was feeling, but those thoughts were very strong. Sometimes I think some things I feel are wrong. the questioning lives inside me, it even disturbs me. I wanted to be alone with myself. Being "alone" is not bad, it is essential to know how to be well alone. I get a lot of pleasure from enjoying things alone. Travel somewhere where I was anonymous and it was just me and my backpack for a few days. You know what I found when I walked into the house? An ashtray with a sticker from a Hot Chocolate disc. It reminded me of Thanksgiving when we were all gathered in the room waiting for you to show up with the cake. When you started playing You Sexy Thing and you showed up with the cake in your hands, I immediately saw the most beautiful smile in the world and your cigarette on the red cigarette holder. I only used the ashtray a few times while I was there.

The sun was shining in Woodstock and a rainbow formed in my head. That sunlight passing through the trees. I could breathe a little and even sleep soundly. I had my coffee on the balcony while I filled out the Chronicles book. Ali, I heard at least 7 times the Bob Dylan’s Dream song before entering again. That time alone served me to learn more about myself and the world. However, that night there was the feeling that the room was getting too big, the microwave lasagna with the individual portion gave me a slap in the face. I looked around wanting to find a familiar expression, someone who asked me about my day.

Shit, I needed to call you right now to say these things, but I would cry. I spend all my time imagining you, Lily. As I lie in my bed, I can’t stop thinking about everything you said to me those days, those nights, those afternoons. Thinkin'Bout You in the starry night, remember? Frank Ocean playing perfectly to make love. We got so drunk that we could barely concentrate on what was around. But we had total control over what was going on in that room. It’s inexplicable how much more beautiful everything looks when you’re around. I remember perfectly how you led me to the delirium. You kissed my back as you bit her, and I looked you in the back of my eyes and I was hypnotized. Your breasts fit perfectly in my hands, your perfectly drawn mouth bewilders me, your wide smile automatically makes me imagine the power of your lips, man.. limb starts throbbing.

You said "Peach me Timmy", and our kisses began to burn, my body feels its touch like never before. Orgasm was like being under the influence of psychodelia. Come on, I’ve never felt it before and neither have you. That morning we made our breakfast to the sound of Otis Redding - Cigarettes And Coffee and we loved each other again. I want the fire we both made to still burn on you. Nothing is the same. I wrote to you almost every day in secret. Adult loneliness is fucked up. And I’m as weak as a man could be and I can’t help it. I want to feel you close to me, if you snap your fingers I’ll run to you, Lily. House Of Cards started playing here in the room, it’s like the volume is increasing by itself and the loneliness starts to fuck my brain without mercy, without affection. It seems like it’s part of adult life to feel this tightness in your chest, this urge to have someone within reach of your hand, skin and embrace. Seeking shelter in the pleasure of others does not solve this. I understand that opening the house and life to another person is scary, but I never wanted another person. I’m sorry about the media toxins, that shit really gets to me. I just want to spend my time with you, hold you tight, squeeze you, tell you what I want. I want to make you happy, I want to be happy. It’s so hard to leave her alone. Oh, fuck, I’m gonna burn that letter and call you right now. [Dialing] ... [Ringtone] - Timoly, ça va? - Lily, merci de me recevoir. [Relief] - I was writing a letter, but I need to hear your voice. I need to feel your voice or look into your eyes. [Voice trembles as if a knot were to untie in tears] - It’s delicious to hear yours. Put me in your room or come to me, and I’ll sing Sexual healing for you. I miss you. [chuckled with excitement] - You surprise me like it’s the first time, it’s so wonderful. I have so much to tell you. Can I find you now? - I wait here at home, you know my address. I also have a lot to say. - A bientôt, mon amour. je t'aime. - je t'aime, Timoly.

{This is a fanfic. All I write about is my feelings and desires. Here I transcribed my interpretations and sensations about the feelings of Timothée Chalamet. TEXT BY: L.M }

#timothée chalamet #Timothée #timothee chalamet #tchalamet #tchalametedit #lily rose depp #frank ocean #marvin gaye #radiohead #hot chocolate #bob dylan #redding #feelings #music

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hi-i-love-u-bitch · 6 years ago

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Turns Out Being a Super Hero Is Actually Really Gay! - Chapter 3

I am so, so sorry this is late guys! A lot of things have been going on and I wasn’t able to finish the chapter on time yesterday. But it’s here now and I hope you like it. As always I would like to thank the lovely @sugarglider9603 and @ask-spiderverse-virgil for there lovely AU for without it I would not have the inspiration to write this. ENJOY!!!

Master Post

Beginning

Next Chapter

So, after the group of teens were done freaking out because “holy shit, Thomas Sanders, top YouTube celebrity, is THE Rainbow Weaver!” Thomas decided to take them to a small but cozy pizza place down town. He bought them six boxes of pizza, hot wings, fries, onion rings, ice cream shakes and a few other goodies, much to the teens protests and insistence that they could pay for themselves. Thomas assured them that it was fine but that still didn’t stop them from arguing that it wasn’t. He payed no mind to their comments as he payed for the food and lead them towards the back of the restaurant where a large circular booth resided, big enough to fit them all.

As Thomas watched these teens…these children scarf down their food like they hadn’t eaten a day in their lives he couldn’t help but worry. He knew exactly how scary it must be for them to suddenly gain strange new powers and not know what to do with them. But the difference between them was that Thomas got his powers near the middle of his senior year of high school and these kids were still…sophomores? Junior? Either way, they were still much to young to be worrying about powers and weird things like that. Unlike them Thomas didn’t have much of a “social life” in high school and college so being Rainbow Weaver was a good distraction from that but these kids…he doubt they were the same.

They had come searching for him for help and honestly Thomas was totally willing to give them whatever help they needed. He just didn’t know what? He wasn’t a teacher, he was a chemical engineering and theater major that did YouTube videos and super heroing on the side. I mean, if they needed help controlling their powers Thomas would to the best, he could to teach them but if they wanted to become super heroes…

“Are you okay, Mr. Sanders?” Thomas looked up to see four pairs of curious eyes looking at him, still munching away at their meal. He was pretty sure it was the stoic looking kid that asked him this, Logan he believed his name was.

“Hmm, yeah,” Thomas said, shaking his head “yeah, why do you ask?”

“You kind of have this…” The loud kid, Roman if he was remembering correctly, gestured towards him “…face, like you’ve just kind of walked into your doom.”

Thomas saw how the groups shoulders slumped, the mood severely brought down by that statement and he really didn’t want to see these boys in anymore distressed then they already were.

“Oh, no, no, uh, I was just…thinking you know,” Thomas sighed, rubbing his face tiredly “like, how is it that Oscorp can screw up twice and let a multimillion-dollar mutant spider escape…again! Like, they’re supposed to be a bunch of geniuses, right? But they’re letting this happen again and god only knows how much more powerful that little spider is. I was lucky enough to have accidently stepped on mine and killed it but it seems that little guy you got there is a bit smarter.”

“Indeed,” Logan perked up “from what I was able to study and pick up from its distorted speech pattern, it seems to know what it’s doing. It was trying to kill us as it saw us as a potential threat, which is why the venom dosage increased with each victim, but it unknowingly mutated our DNA. To say it was disappointed that I woke up the next morning is…an understatement.”

“It likes me though.” The gloomy kid, Virgil he recalled, stated smugly.

Logan rolled his eyes, “Yes, well you did help it escape out your window so of course it sees you as some sort of ally.”

“Are we just going to skip over the fact that it TRIED to kill us?” Roman said worriedly.

“Yes, because I don’t wanna think about it,” The cutesy kid, Patton, whined childishly but there was a glint of fear in his eyes “and for the record tell that creepy crawly death dealer that I don’t like it either!”

“It’s nothing personal Patton,” Virgil assured “consciously or not it’s just a defense mechanism all spiders have when they’re scared.”

“I don’t care,” Patton cried “I still don’t want it anywhere near me!”

Thomas watched as they continued to argue and bicker, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips and the bitter taste of dread at the pit of his stomach. These were kids, teenagers really but still kids none the less, still full of life and wonder. He couldn’t burden them with the life of a hero. All the worry and sleepless nights and existential dread that came along with the job would definitely snuff out whatever innocence these boys had left. But he couldn’t just leave them to their own devices, they needed guidance on how to navigate their new-found powers. He’d be willing to do that, only that, nothing else. His job was dangerous as it was and he didn’t need to drag these kids into it, especially if they still don’t yet know how to control their powers.

“So, I’ve been thinking,” Thomas said, finally interrupting the boys’ argument “I can help you guys out, well, I can try. I’ll help you guys understand what you’re going through and how to control your powers better, though I’m not sure if we’re exactly the same in that regard. Again, I have no idea what advances Oscorp has made in genetic splicing. You all could have totally different powers then what I’m used to.”

“We have all the basic functions,” Logan explained helpfully “though only Virgil and Roman can make webbing and I assume you can’t hear at the frequency we have; thus, you can’t hear the spider talking.”

“You would be correct in that assumption,” Thomas nodded “though, I mean, sometimes I can sense where they are and how they’re feeling but that’s about it. Nothing too crazy. Anything else?”

“None that we know of,” Roman shrugged “we’ve just been sticking to things all day and seeing weird colors radiating off each other like fireworks and this weird buzzing in the back of our head that keeps telling us somethings happening.”

“Yeah, that would be your spidy sense.” Thomas said.

The boys tilted their heads like some sort of adorable, confused puppy, “Spidy sense?”

“It’s a thing that I have and you guys have that makes us a LOT more aware of our surroundings,” Thomas explained “how do you think I’m able to attack, dodge, and shoot things without even looking at them?”

“Oh, you mean precognition,” Logan said “like the crab spider.”

“Sort of,” Thomas said “think of it as a sort of alarm clock that goes off every time dangers near.”

“Oh great, just what I need in my life,” Virgil said sarcastically “even more anxiety.”

“Yeah, that’s gunna be a tough one for you to handle bud,” Thomas said sympathetically “given that you have anxiety it’ll feel like one and the same but I’ll teach you a few tricks to help tell the difference.”

Virgil gave him a shy appreciative smile and Thomas all but melted as the kid mumbled, “Th-thanks…that would…help a lot actually.”

No Sanders! Do not get attached to these kids! Do not!

“So, um, what are we gunna do now?” Patton piped up shyly “Are you gunna teach us to be super heroes?”

“Do we get to be your sidekicks?” Roman asked excitedly, practically bouncing in his seat.

Thomas bit the inside of his cheek anxiously, “Um, well, I’ll teach you guys how to control your powers and understand yourselves better and everything but I don’t think-”

“Obviously, we would have to train a significant amount before even considering becoming his sidekicks.” Logan stated plainly.

“I know that Einstein,” Roman huffed “I’m just asking!”

“Wait, if we’re gunna do this are we gunna have to make our own costumes or something?” Virgil asked “Because I don’t know if I’m willing to put in that much effort.”

“Ooo, Roman and I can help you guys if you want,” Patton offered “I’m good at sewing and Roman sometimes helps out the costume department at the drama club.”

“Thank you, Patton, but I don’t think we should be thinking about costumes until after we’ve completed our training.” Logan said.

“Boo you whore,” Roman grumbled “you’re no fun.”

“You are not super heroes!” Thomas said firmly causing the table to go quiet, all four boys staring at him with a mixture of confusion and disappointment. He sighed, “Look, guys, my job as Rainbow Weaver, it’s not a game. It’s dangerous and tiring and…is the biggest responsibility you could ever ask for.”

The boys fidgeted in their seats, having now realized they were sort of jumping to conclusions and not seeing the reality of the situation. Thomas continued on, “You guys are just kids, you’re still in high school, you’re still growing, you still have a life! I don’t want you guys to leave that behind. Being a super hero may seem cool and glamorous but it’s a lot of work and sometimes…” There was a look of pain that flashed across Thomas is eyes, too quick for the boys to properly evaluate “…sometimes you won’t be able to save everyone. This is a job where you can’t afford to make mistakes because they have dire consequences. For you, the people around you, their families, everyone, they’re all affected. And no one will give you the benefit of the doubt because you’re a hero and it’s your job to protect them.”

It was silent for a moment then Roman asked, quiet and unsure, “If it’s such a burden then…why did you become a hero?”

The look of pain and regret returned to Thomas is eyes as he ran an anxious hand across his salt and pepper brown hair, “To become a better person then what I once was.”

“What does that mean?” Virgil asked bravely but still quite gentle.

“Sometimes,” Thomas began carefully “things happen and…people get hurt and then you have no choice but to take responsibility for that.” No one pressed him any further but it seemed Thomas still had more to say, “You guys have an opportunity to…live a normal life. I had that opportunity but the choices I made forced me to abandon it and I regret it so much. But I knew it was something to be done and because of it I did end up helping a lot of people but…also hurting a lot of people as well.”

Finally, Thomas looked back up at them, a strong determined look in his eyes, “I don’t want you guys going through the same experiences as I did. I want you boys to live your lives as normally as possible. Go out, make friends, date, have parties, worry about exams…live a life. Because if you choose to go down this path this will be your only life, do you understand?”

It was quiet again, this time much longer and this time it was Logan who chose to brake it, “No offence, Mr. Sanders, we understand completely what you’re trying to tell us but what else do you expect us to do with these abilities?”

Thomas sighed tiredly, “Look, kid-”

“No, we get it,” Logan continued “well, at least, I know I do. I can not speak for us all but I understand how big of a responsibility this is. But do you really expect us to go about our lives normally as we did before? How are we supposed to live “normally” when we know that we are anything but? How are we going to go our whole lives doing nothing and letting our powers sit dormant when we can feel it itching beneath our skin? Honestly, could you have done that?”

Thomas thought a moment, flashing back to when he first got his powers and how everything felt jittery and loud. How he had trouble sitting still and had been restless for days. Then he became Rainbow Weaver and everything changed, it was difficult yes but it really helped get out a lot of that nervous, restless energy he had inside him. He felt he was using his powers correctly and not just sitting there while his head buzzed like an angry hornets’ nest. When he first got his powers, he knew he needed to do SOMETHING with them but he didn’t know what. That lead to a lot of trouble be even then after he knew that he still couldn’t just sit there.

“I’ll admit that I would have been restless and miserable my entire life if I hadn’t become Rainbow Weaver,” Thomas answered honestly “however, I think I still would of chosen to do so instead of taking on the mask.”

“Do you really hate being Rainbow Weaver that much?” Virgil asked. He looked…hurt? Disappointed? Thomas wasn’t quite sure but he knew for sure that he didn’t like it.

“I don’t hate being Rainbow Weaver,” Thomas said, looking out the window next to their booth “it’s just…after a couple of years it kind of takes a toll on you. I’m just a tired, grumpy old man, nothing special.”

More silence, the boys quietly mulling over the conversation, fidgeting with that same restless energy mentioned earlier and then…

“You’re special to me.”

Thomas looked back to see Roman staring back at him with a pout and a gentle yet fiery look in his eyes. “You may not think yourself special as a person but to me, be it Thomas Sanders or Rainbow Weaver, you’ve brought…just a little bit more joy into my life. And maybe it’s not a lot to someone like you but it’s a lot to me. So…if I could be able to do that for someone, even if it’s just one person, I’d be over the moon.

“I understand your concern and you’re absolutely right, this is not a game. But Logan is, dare I say it, right, we can’t just sit around letting these powers fester inside us. What are we supposed to do with our selves for the rest of our lives? Can’t go back to being normal when we know for damn sure we’re not and I don’t know about the rest of you but I want to do more with my life. Especially now that I can!”

Thomas sighed once more, rubbing a hand over his face and hair, “You gotta understand kid, this isn’t like the comic books. The dangers and hardships are real and once you’re in there is no going back.”

“And I accept that,” Roman replied firmly “I accept all of it and everything and…if I live to regret it then oh well. But I know that I’ll regret it more knowing I had the power to do something but instead chose to do nothing. In the end it’s my choice and nobody else is.”

Well, I’m not sure about the whole super hero thing,” Virgil pipped up “but…I do feel like I should be doing something with these powers. I’ve taught my self to play it safe and keep quiet my whole life but now…now I wanna do something more. I don’t want to just sit here letting the world pass me by anymore I want…I want to do something spontaneous and brave.

“A-and I know this isn’t some sort of hobby you pick up like dancing or painting or something,” Virgil said quickly “but I feel like…it’s something I need to do. Something I have to do. Do you get what I’m saying?”

“I…” Thomas wanted to say yes, yes, he understood everything that they were saying because it was what drove him to be Rainbow Weaver in the first place. But he also wanted to lie and say no, just so he can protect these kids from the horrors that awaited them down the hero’s path.

“Plus,” Patton added “you look like you could use the help. It must be difficult looking after an entire city alone. And since we all have powers now, we can make the work a whole lot easier for you in return for you helping us control our powers.”

“Indeed,” Logan said, readjusting his fake glasses “crime rate will surely go down in numbers with five on the team. It will give you time to have optimal rest between shifts as well as pursue what ever other hobbies you previously could not do. It’s a solid business proposition for all of us, we get the proper training we need to control our new-found abilities and you have a more balanced out schedule for both your vigilante duties and personal life.”

Thomas looked over these kids, determination in their eyes and fire in their bellies, ready to take on the weight of the world for him. They were stubborn and foolish and so not ready for anything yet to come…but it would be very hypocritical of Thomas to deny them this path. Plus, he wasn’t their parent, it wasn’t like he could completely tell them what to do. All he could do was warn them of what was ahead and hope to whatever god above they take his advice. Thomas sighed again, then he groaned, then he banged his head against the table because these kids were so stubborn, exactly like him, and it was all just so frustrating. He looked back up at them, face squished against the table as four pairs of worried eyes stared at him, he probably looked insane. He probably was insane but was too deep in shit to actually be affected by anything now.

“Fine.” Thomas said, he was so going to regret this.

“Fine what?” Roman asked.

Thomas made a vague gesture with his hand, “Fine, I’ll…teach you and train you guys and, if you really want, I’ll…consider letting you help me out a bit.”

“Really?” Logan said, somewhat excitedly, like a child on Christmas.

If this were not such a serious matter Thomas would of laughed, “But nothing to dangerous, just…common things, purse muggers, corner store robberies, assaulters, jay walkers, all that jazz.”

“Hey, that’s good enough for me.” Virgil said, a small excited smile growing on this face.

“Me too!” Patton exclaimed.

“I second that motion.” Logan added.

“Epic!” Roman cheered.

“But!” Thomas interrupted “You guys are still minors and in high school so you all are under my rule, got it? You do exactly as I say when I say it.”

They all nodded enthusiastically, still jittery with excitement as Thomas continued to give out instructions, “This is a dangerous job and I want you all trained first and for most. So, we aren’t gunna be going out on patrol anytime soon, get that into your head right now. Secondly, it is imperative you keep all of this a secret, everything we do can not only put you at risk but your families and friends.”

“Luckily, I don’t have any friends.” Virgil half joked.

Logan rolled his eyes, “Gee, thanks.”

“Thirdly,” Thomas cut in, his expression growing dark and serious “if you guys are going to do this, you have to be willing to put everything you have into this. No short cuts, no half assed effort, no walking away. It’s all or nothing, got it?”

“Got it.” They echoed, just as serious and determined as Thomas feared they’d be.

“Alright,” Thomas huffed, leaning back to stretch “let’s finish up here and then we have to go somewhere.”

“Where?” Patton asked curiously.

“There are a few people I want you to meet.” Thomas smirked mysteriously.

---

Thomas had been worried at first, it was very suspicious for a grown adult man to take for underaged teenagers to his house. It gave off the wrong impression to people and made him look like a creep. But what else could he do but make sure the boys were safe and comfortable, assuring them that nothing bad would happen even though when he said it out loud it still sounded mildly disturbing. Like sure, he was Rainbow Weaver, but he was still a stranger to these boys and he did not want to scare them off when they had no where else to turn to for help.

Thankfully the boys understood Thomas is worry and were careful to not crowed around too much to make it seem weird. When they got to his neighborhood Roman commented that the two-story brownstone townhouse Thomas lived in looked like the house from Stuart Little. Thomas paused a moment, tilting his head back to get a good look at his house before chuckling and reluctantly agreeing that, “Yeah, you’re kind of right.”

Inside, the house was spacious and neat, band, concert, musical and play posters hung on the wall alongside pictures of Thomas and his friends and family. There were lots of colors, figurines from movies and shows, potted plants on shelves, tables and corners, and just and overall warm atmosphere.

“Whoa, your house is really neat-o!” Patton exclaimed, excitingly looking over one of the potted plants filled with sweet peas.

Thomas smiled bashfully, “Oh, thanks, I-”

“You went to a My Chemical Romance concert?!” Virgil gasped softly as he stared at one of the hung-up posters “And you got it signed?!”

“Yeah,” Thomas nodded “me and Joan went-”

“You went to see Hamilton!” Roman squealed, looking up at another poster “And you got it signed by Lin Manuel Mirandas!”

“Yes and-”

“Do you have the entire anthology of Agatha Christie and Arthur Conan Doyle’s work?” Logan asked excitedly, he ran his finger over the books of the bookshelf and plucked out The Murder of Roger Ackroyd.

“Not entirely but-”

“Oh my gosh!” Patton squealed, running over to the living room towards the shelf filled with pop vinyl’s “You have a bunch of Winnie the Pooh pops! And Steven Universe! I love that show!”

“I heard Steven Universe!” Roman exclaimed, rushing in behind his friend.

“Where?” Virgil chimed in, not to far behind with Logan tailing along, nose deep in a Sherlock Holmes book.

“You have a record player!” Roman gasped, quickly kneeling to look through Thomas is record box “What types of records do you have?”

“Oh, David Bowie!” Patton smiled as he pulled out a record.

“Cool, the Beatles White Album!” Virgil grinned.

“Isn’t that the one that Charles Manson was obsessed over?” Roman asked.

“It’s still a good album.” Virgil and Thomas said at the same time. They blinked at each other in surprise before dissolving into a fit of giggles. It was all a little more chaotic then what Thomas was expecting but it wasn’t unwelcome. Thomas didn’t usually have many people over except for Joan and Talyn so it was…nice hearing the house so full of laughter.

Speaking of Joan and Talyn…

“Thomas? Is that you?” A voice from down the hall made it’s way closer and closer to the living room where it was revealed to belong to a lanky, scraggily looking person in an orange beanie. “Talyn and I just finished-”

They paused, looking over the scene carefully as the boys all froze like deer caught in headlights. They scanned over each teen one by one before making direct eye contact with Thomas and carefully asking: “What the hell is going on?”

“Joan, uh,” Thomas flubbered in place, caught way off guard “look, hears the thing, uh, they have what I have.”

“That isn’t making any of this look any better Thomas!” Joan exclaimed, frustrated.

“Uh…”

“We have spider powers!” Roman butted in, shooting a web at a nearby picture frame causing it to fall and brake “Sorry!”

“God damn it Roman!” Virgil shrieked “Be careful, this isn’t your house!”

“Oh please,” Roman huffed “as if you weren’t just going through his vinyl collection not five seconds ago. And without permission might I add.”

“You did so as well,” Logan rebutted “so it’s kind of hypocritical of you to make that statement.”

“Right back at you!” Roman shot back, gesturing to the book in Logan’s hands.

The bespectacled man flushed with embarrassment, setting the book down on a nearby table as Virgil bounced back up, “Well, he’s not the one that broke something!”

“Come on guys, please no fighting.” Patton begged but it fell on deaf ears and soon the room was filled with loud arguing. Joan and Thomas observed the chaos unfold silently, contemplating what their best course of action should be. Wait it out? Get involved?

“What’s going on?” Another voice chimed in and the room went silent once more, turning to find a short person with orange and black hair. Joan pointed to Thomas who merely shrugged sheepishly and said: “Talyn, you’re never gunna believe this.”

---

They head down towards Thomas is basement (which still sounds super fucking creepy) and find that it has been transformed into pretty sizable high-tech lab. If Logan had been excited by the books that Thomas owned, he was over the moon by all the gadgets and text books he had down there. He kept asking question after question about how everything worked and what did this do and what did that do? Thomas found the whole thing very amusing, like watching a little kid at a candy store.

“Did you all make all this stuff?” Logan asked excitedly.

“Well, it was mainly Joan and Talyn.” Thomas said.

“Don’t sell yourself short man,” Joan scolded lightly, patting their friend on the back “you did a lot of the designing and schematics. Not your fault you had to be out saving everybody.”

“Stay still please,” Talyn ordered gently, seating Logan on a near by chair next to Patton, Roman, and Virgil who had a few suction cup wires stuck to their foreheads, necks, chests, and arms. “The scanning process will go a lot faster if we’re able to draw blood from you and use is as a sort of blue print to navigate your body. Is that okay?”

The boys looked at each other tentatively before all nodding in agreement. As Talyn got a few petri dishes and micro slides ready Joan had taken the spider from Logan’s backpack and transferred it into a small containment unit that was hooked up to the large motherboard computer. Thomas watched anxiously from the sideline as his friends scurried around to get everything ready.

“So, what are you gunna do to us?” Virgil asked nervously as Talyn carefully wiped down one of his fingers with rubbing alcohol.

“Well, we took a sample from the spider and scanning it right now to see what’s been mixed in to it,” Talyn explained as they took a clean syringe needle and pricked his finger with it dropping blood into the petri dish and micro slid before bandaging it up. It hadn’t even hurt. “Then we’re gunna use your DNA to see what’s been transformed as well as to easily scan your vitals.”

“Why are you doing that?” Patton asked as he watched them move on to Roman.

“Well for one, to make sure your mutation is stable,” Joan chimed in helpfully “and to also see what other abilities you guys may have. Keep in mind you guys may or may not have other abilities within you that will take a bit of time to, uh, activate.”

“What happens if our mutation isn’t stable?” Roman asked, rubbing his bandage finger.

The adults were quiet for a moment which of course did not sit well with the teens one bit. Talyn gently smiled at them, wrapping up Patton’s finger before finally moving on to Logan. “Don’t worry about it, it’s most likely not going to happen. You boys seem pretty stable from what we’ve observed.”

“That’s not ominous at all.” Virgil said sarcastically.

“Starting scan,” Joan announced once Talyn was finish getting their sample from Logan. They typed away quickly at the computer as a long beam of blue light scanned the quartet up and down and a light tingly sensation was felt where the suction cups were attached. The boys didn’t move once, much to fearful they might accidently mess up the scanning process, Virgil didn’t even want to breath.

Finally, after a few seconds, there was an audible beep and the blue lights shut off. Virgil, along with the other three, let out a loud sigh, shoulders still a bit tense but not as much as when the scanning was happening. Thomas quickly walked over towards them to make sure they were okay.

“You guys good?” He asked.

“We’re okie dokie,” Patton giggled nervously “just, uh, a bit frazzled.”

“I think I’m stuck to my chair.” Virgil admitted bashfully, his hands had been gripping the sides of the stool and Thomas could now see that he was physically trying to pull them off.

“Hey, hey, hey, you’re gunna hurt yourself,” Thomas cooed softly “just breath, in for four…hold for seven…out for eight. Good job, keep it up.”

Once he was able to calm Virgil down enough and get him unstuck, he looked to the others to make sure they were okay too. As Patton said earlier, he was a bit frazzled but ultimately okay, Roman was a bit jittery but seemed to be calming down as he followed Virgil’s breathing technique. Logan was just fine and was once again talking and asking a dozen questions about what just happened and how it worked and what did they find and etcetera, etcetera.

“Good news, your mutation is stable,” Joan announced and there was an obvious sigh of relief from both Thomas and the boys “we have found some interesting data though. This poor little spider has been spliced through hell and back. It’s practically a new species on it’s own, way different then the first generation that bit Thomas.”

“How so?” Logan asked, intrigued.

“Well, for one it has a few functions not typically normal for a spider,” Talyn said, looking through a few graphs on their tablet “it’s been extremely enhanced and mutated over and over again. Like if they were copying the same piece of paper again and again. It just all stacks up into this…it can barely be called a spider, I honestly don’t know what it is.”

“Well, it still looks like a creepy crawly spider to me.” Patton pouted.

“Looks are one thing, the function of it is another,” Joan said thoughtfully, pressing a few buttons and gesturing towards the containment unit the spider was in “watch this.”

The boys and Thomas looked towards the chamber and watched the spider scuttle around as the soft buzz of electricity filled its tank then it disappeared. Their eyes widened as they did a double take to make sure that really happened and the spider really wasn’t there anymore.

“Where’d it go?” Roman asked.

“It’s still there,” Joan said, typing once more and the tank was soon glossed over in Infrared light. There they saw the spider, still inside, scuttling around its tank as if nothing has changed. “Besides invisibility it seems to have other super abilities as well. We can’t for sure name all of them but I’ve got a few here listed out and ready for testing.”

“Sit back boys, Thomas move out of the way, please,” Talyn ordered gently “this’ll tingle a little.”

They typed something out on their tablet and the boys felt a slight tingle of electricity move throughout their bodies. It didn’t hurt and it didn’t last long so the boys were left confused as to what happened. Until they looked to Virgil.

“Virgil?” Logan called out, looking around the lab when he saw that his friend was no longer seated on the stool “Where’d you go?”

“I’m right here.” A disembodied voice said.

Patton screamed, jumping out of his chair and on to Roman’s lap, “There’s a ghost!”

“What?”

“V-Virgil, is that you?” Roman asked, holding Patton close.

“Yeah, what are you guys looking at?” The voice demanded.

“We aren’t looking at anything, we’re looking for you.” Logan said.

“But I’m right-” There was a sudden pause then a shriek of fear “I can’t see my-my hands or my feet or my anything!”

Thomas quickly turned to Joan and Talyn when he heard the panic rise in Virgil’s voice, “Whatever you did, stop it now!”

Talyn nodded, quickly typing on their tablet and another small tingle of electricity was sent out. Virgil reappeared slowly, arms hugging around his waist as he curled into himself and eyes squeezed shut. Thomas was by his side in an instant, gently coxing him back to reality, “Hey, its okay, you’re okay. Breath for me, please.”

Virgil took a breath and peeked out from one eye before looking down and sighing with relief when he was able to see himself again. He looked back up to Thomas with fearful eyes, “W-what was that?”

“I’m not sure,” Thomas admitted before looking over and firmly pining his two friends with a look “what did you guys do?”

They gave an apologetic smile as Joan leaped to explain what happened, “Well, we sent the same small electric pulse we used on the spider towards your brain to see if you would have the same effects. Obviously, it did and obviously we should have prepared you guys a bit more in advance. We’re sorry.”

“Yeah, that’s our bad.” Talyn added.

Thomas sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, “Guys, we talked about this, please give substantial warning BEFORE the experiment happens. Not everyone is super geniuses like you two and know exactly what’s going to happen.”

“I take it this has happened before?” Logan stated, having now gotten up to be by Virgil’s side, a hand placed gently on his friends back rubbing soothing circles.

“Yeah,” Thomas admitted “but usually it’s with me on the receiving end. I’m used to it by now but of course you guys aren’t so…” He gave his friends a pointed look “warning next time.”

“Next time?” Virgil squeaked.

“Oh, you don’t have to if you don’t want to,” Thomas assured quickly “we can do this another day. I know today has been really stressful for you boys already so I understand if you guys want to go home already and get some rest.”

“No, no, I’m fine,” Virgil said quickly “really, just…you know, a little freaked out. Might as well get it over with now so we won’t have to worry about it later.”

“Are you sure?” Logan asked, his hand still remained in contact with Virgil’s back.

“Don’t push yourself too hard,” Roman added “mental health is just as important as physical health you know.”

“Yeah kiddo, if it’s gunna be too much for you we rather just wait for a bit to cool down.” Patton said sweetly.

Virgil cheeks flushed a light pink, head ducking down so that his bangs cover his eyes, “I’m fine, really. Th-thanks for checking up though. But, like, what about you guys? How do you guys feel about all this…experimenting stuff?”

“Yeah, I want to make sure you boys are all comfortable with all of this,” Thomas said firmly “if anything crosses a line or you want to stop, tell us okay?”

“I’m good.” Roman nodded.

“I am as well.” Logan confirmed, sitting back down.

“Me too.” Patton chimed in as he climbed off of Roman’s lap.

“I’ll be fine.” Virgil murmured.

“Excellent,” Joan said excitingly turning back to the computer “the next set of tests will be of a similar fashion. We’ll send a wave of electronic pules to your brain’s nervous system and see if we can get a reaction.”

“Remember, if you guys get uncomfortable or need us to stop don’t be afraid to tell us, okay?” Talyn added.

With one last nod of confirmation Joan said, “Let us begin.”

---

“Roman can you sing a note for me?” Talyn asked.

Roman gave her a look of confusion, “You want me to sing? I mean, not that I won’t do it but why?”

“With this test we seem to only be getting a reaction from your brain so I want to see if the ability we’ve unlocked is active,” Talyn explained “but make sure to face the wall over there, please.”

“Uh, okay,” Roman said, shifting in his seat towards the directed area “can I ask what ability this is?”

“Sonic sound waves,” Joan said casually “we all might want to take a step back just in case.”

Thomas and the other three stepped behind Roman who in turn rolled his eyes before focusing on the task at hand. All he had to do was sing a note, but like what note? How high? How loud? How would this even work? Roman sighed, shrugged, and decided to just riff Ariel’s theme.

“Ah, ah, ah! Ah, ah, ah!”

The room shook and shuttered like an earthquake. Everyone covered their ears from be beautiful yet ear piercingly loud tune that shook the entire building. The wall which Roman was facing when he sang had shook so violently there was a large crack that ripped down the middle of it.

Roman was quick to cover his mouth, eyes wide at the destruction he’s caused, “Oh dear…”

“Yeah, I think we should have that dormant for now until he learns how to control it.” Thomas suggested, trying to settle the ringing in his ear.

“We can’t exactly turn their powers on or off,” Joan explained “these are just electric pulses that activate their powers for them artificially. On their own we don’t know when these powers will pop up or how they’ll be able to activate them. It could take days, months, even years.”

“I just hope it doesn’t come out during the play this winter.” Roman moaned.

---

“This one is simple,” Joan said as they walked over towards a light switch on a wall “it shows that each of you have some variation of night vision, though I’m not sure how strong it is. I’m gunna turn off the light and you guys tell me what you see, okay?”

Four nods of agreement were seen and Joan finally flipped the switch. Nothing happened, well, at least for Logan. He looked around confused, was the light switch broken? Everything still looked the same to him.

“What do you see?” Talyn asked, they stared straight ahead at nothing and Logan wondered why that was.

“You still haven’t turned off the light.” Logan stated obviously.

Joan, who was also looking into the nothingness, pulled a face of confusion before breaking out into a large grin, “Logan, we just switched them off.”

“No, you haven’t,” Logan argued “I mean you used the light switch but they’re still….on.” He looked up to the florescent lights above him that were now dark and it suddenly dawned on him “I have night vision…”

“I think I do too,” Virgil piped up, squinting around the room “but when you turned off the light everything just kind of got dim.”

“Yeah, me too.” Patton chimed in.

“It all turned black and white for me,” Roman said “like, I can see everything fine but it’s all just shades of gray.”

“Excellent,” Joan smiled, flicking the light switch back on “it seems like Logan has the better night vision out of everyone. Roman’s vision is probably more what the spider would see normally and Patton and Virgil’s are about the same as Thomas.”

“Why do you think that is?” Logan asked curiously “We all got bit by the same spider so you would assume we would all be the same ability wise.”

“You’re all different,” Talyn said obviously “if you were the same person then maybe you’d have similar reactions but depending on your DNA your bodies will react to the venom differently. Plus, you did theorize that with each victim the spider used more and more venom so that can also be an important factor.”

Logan nodded thoughtfully, “I guess so.”

---

“We’re gunna do a quick test on just you Patton,” Talyn said as they tied a blindfold over Patton’s eyes “we’ve been picking up some strange brainwaves coming from you and we want to if we’re right.”

“Uh, okay,” Patton said tentatively, squirming in his seat “is it something bad?”

“No, no nothing bad,” Talyn assured “it’s just we’ve noticed that you seemed to be a very empathetic person and we want to see if that has been enhanced in anyway with your mutation.”

“Oh, well, what are we gunna do then?” Patton asked.

“Well, we’ve given everybody a note card of a certain feeling and they’re gunna try to emulate that feeling,” Joan explained as they passed out the note cards “your job is to guess what that feeling is.”

“How am I gunna do that?” Patton asked, head turning to try and track Joan’s voice.

“How ever you deem it necessary,” Joan said “I’ve known some people to sense thing through auras and given your ‘spidy sense’ that could be the case. But sometimes physical contact is needed to truly pick up what the other person is feeling.”

“Mmh, okay,” Patton said “but why the blindfold?”

“Eye contact and facial features can sometimes give away what a person’s feeling very easily,” Talyn chimed in “so this a ‘no cheating’ blindfold.”

“Oooh, sorry, I’m dumb.” Patton giggled.

“You are NOT dumb, Patton!” Roman said firmly, arms crossed stubbornly and glaring at his best friend even though Patton couldn’t see him.

Patton smiled passively, “Whatever you say, Ro.”

“I will punch you in the name of friendship!” Roman declared dramatically.

The group laughed at the two friends’ antics before quickly settling into silence as Joan lined them up in front of Patton with them going first. Patton fidgeted nervously as Joan stood in front him, he could tell someone was there but he just couldn’t read them properly. Shyly, Patton extended both his hands out, palms up, and Joan silently replied by carefully setting their own hands over his.

“I feel…curious,” Patton hummed “like, I have a lot of questions, well, they have a lot of question. I have questions too but that’s not me feeling question…wait can you feel question? Oh, it’s changing. They’re amused but also satisfied that they’re questions have been answered. Is that right?”

“Yes, it is.” Joan chuckled, letting go of Patton’s hands.

“Oh, Joan,” Patton said surprised “I didn’t know you’d be participating too. I don’t have to guess names, right? I don’t think I can do that.”

“No, just feelings.” They assured, stepping away and letting the next person go up.

Virgil carefully stepped up, looking down at his note card before stuffing it in his pocket. He just stood there a moment, staring down at Patton’s extended hands before carefully reaching out to grab them. Patton hummed curiously, soft warm hands squeezing Virgil’s gently.

“They’re kind of nervous,” Patton stated “they really don’t know what they should be doing right now. Aw, don’t be nervous, you’re doing great. Oh, they’re relaxing a little, that’s good. Glad I could lend a hand.”

Virgil snorted, Logan groaned in the background and everybody else chuckled. Patton giggled delightfully, “See, they think I’m funny! Did I do good?”

“Doing great Patton,” Joan assured “Next please.”

Virgil stepped out of the way for Thomas to move forward. The older man was hesitant at first but ultimately sighed, handing his note card off to Joan before grabbing hold of Patton’s hands. Immediately, Patton’s smiling face morphed into a melancholy frown, brow knitting together as if in immense pain.

“Oh they’re…i-it feels…sad,” Patton whimpered, voice cracked and watery “b-but it’s not a normal sad it’s like…like they lost someone precious to them.”

The others watch on with amazement and worry as tears began to stream down Patton’s face, “They’re in a lot of pain but…they also feel empty and cold. N-now they feel guilty, oh don’t feel guilty! I’m fine, really it’s just…can I give you a hug?”

Thomas looked down at Patton’s tear stained face, fear and guilt clawing at his chest for causing so much destress to such a sweet kid. Taking a breath to calm himself Thomas stepped forward and engulfed the teen in a big hug. Patton was quick to wrap his arms tightly around Thomas’s waist as if he was trying to physically mend all of Thomas is broken pieces back together. Warmth bloomed in Thomas’s chest at the sweet gesture and he couldn’t help but squeeze a little tighter and hold on a bit longer. The room was calm and quiet, no one wanting to disturb the gentle moment being had between the two.

“I know it’s hard but…I promise we’ll get through it eventually.” Patton murmured gently into his chest.

They final let go after a long while and Thomas sheepishly side stepped away while Patton wiped away the tears from under his blindfold. Roman was about to step forward but Talyn held him back to take his place, seeing that Roman’s note card also had an extreme emotion they figured Patton could use a bit of an emotional cool down. Gently, Talyn grabbed onto Patton’s hands, rubbing soothing circles over his fingers.

“They’re very clam,” Patton sniffed, taking in a breath then slowly letting it out “it’s gentle and nice, very soothing. Like, aloe being put over a burn mark…that’s weird analogy, I’m sorry.”

Talyn huffed out a laugh, “I think it’s suitable.”

“Oh, Talyn, you’re here too,” Patton smiled “did I get it right?”

“Mmh,” Talyn nodded before realizing Patton couldn’t see them “yeah, you did. We can stop now if you want, we have plenty of date.”

“No, I wanna finish,” Patton said determined “I’m fine to continue.”

“You sure?” Talyn asked carefully.

Patton nodded, “Yes, I’m sure.”

“Okay, next person.” Talyn stepped aside and let Roman take their place. Roman handed them his note card before firmly taking Patton’s hands in his. Patton pouted, his brow scrunched up in annoyance.

“I feel…angry,” Patton said “well, maybe not ‘angry’ angry but like…kind of annoyed, maybe a little more frustrated. Also, a tad bit worried. Geez, what’s got you so riled up?”

“Because my best friend thinks he’s dumb but he’s not and I love him very much!” Roman grumbled, stomping his foot childishly “Also you were crying earlier and I don’t like seeing you sad.”

“Aw, Ro-Ro,” Patton giggled, pulling Roman in for a hug “I love you too, sorry for making you worry.”

“It’s not your fault Peaches,” Roman murmured, burying his face into Patton’s hair “but to quote you: ‘if you keep talking bad about yourself, I will physically fight you!’”

The friends giggled, holding each other for a little while longer until Roman finally “forgave” Patton and moved out of the way for the last person. Logan fidgeted nervously, quite unlike his usual calm and cool self, frowning down at the note card in his hand, “Happy” it read. Logan was pretty sure that Virgil switched out their note cards if the smug face he had was anything to go by. He glared at his best friend before handing off the note card and stepping in front of Patton, who extended his hands readily.

Logan gulped nervously, no that was not the right emotion to be having right now. Happy, he had to be happy. Think happy thoughts…what kind of happy thoughts? His mother’s homed cooked Mansaf…his first telescope his brother got him on his 7th birthday…the first time his father took him to the aquarium and the jelly fish looked like stars…the time Virgil fell down the stairs…Logan huffed a small laugh on that last one.

Carefully, Logan lifted his hands and hovered them a few inches above Patton’s own. He gulped again, face red hot and all eyes (minus Patton’s) were on him, waiting. Why was he nervous? Why couldn’t he move? Why were his hands suddenly so sweaty? This was just an experiment, it was not big deal!

“Um, are you still there?” Patton asked, confused as to why it was taking so long.

“Give them a minute,” Joan said helpfully, but the knowing smirk on his and everybody else is face wasn’t helpful at all. At least not for Logan.

“Oh, okay, take your time.” Patton said soothingly, a soft smile painting his face. Patton always had a nice smile, it made everything feel lighter. Logan was quick to stop that train of thought and immediately dropped his hands onto Patton’s.

Patton hummed quietly, his hands were soft and warm, short and fat compared to Logan’s cold, clammy, spindly fingers. They were so different and yet they felt completely natural together. It was a completely absurd and illogical thought to say the least but it was a common thought process Logan had whenever he was around the bright sunshine of a human being known as Patton Foster.

Patton smiled, a pretty blush spreading across his cheeks, “It’s really warm and fluttery.”

‘Fuck, fuck, fuck!’ Logan thought to himself ‘Abort mission! Abort mission!’

But he was frozen in place as Patton continued to explain, “Like a thousand butterflies in my stomach but I also want to throw up at the same time. Not in a bad way though. They’re a bit nervous too but also kind of excited. They’re in love!”

Logan choked on his own spit and he heard Virgil and Roman in the background quietly snickering to themselves. He threw them a glare to shut up before turning back to remove his hands but found that Patton still held them firmly in his own. Turns out he wasn’t done yet.

“They’re embarrassed now,” He said tentatively “was I not supposed to say that? Sorry, I got excited. You’re love is a very nice feeling and whoever that lucky person is to receive it I hope they know how wonderfully blessed they are.”

Logan was pretty sure his face was on fire now, he’s surprised that the smoke alarm hadn’t started beeping. Or maybe it has but he just couldn’t hear it over the beating of his own heart in his ears and Roman and Virgil’s annoying laughter. Logan cleared his throat, shaking his thoughts out of his head before carefully removing his hands from Patton’s gentle hold and rejoining the group.

“Did I get it right?” Patton asked.

“Uh, it wasn’t what was written on the note card but I think you still got it right,” Joan chuckled as they went to remove Patton’s blindfold as well as the suction cups on his head and neck “I think that’s enough testing for today. It’s getting late and you kids should probably start getting home.”

“Should we come back tomorrow?” Patton asked, blinking his eyes to adjust to the light.

“Only if you want to,” Thomas butted in before either Joan or Talyn could answer “and only if you guys are not busy. Remember, you still have school and a life to attend to.”

“Don’t remind me,” Roman whined “I still gotta finish my homework when I get home.”

“That’s ironic since we told our parents we were in a study group.” Logan said.

“What time is it anyway?” Virgil asked, stretching out his arms.

Talyn looked down at their watch, “’Bout to be eight thirty.”

“Eight thirty!” The boys exclaimed, panic rising in their eyes as they scrambled to pack their things.

“Aw, man my mom’s gunna kill for missing dinner!” Patton shrieked.

“You’re mom? Have you met my mom?” Roman voice cracked “She still thinks I’m sick and wanted me to stay home!”

“Thanks for everything Mr. Sanders, uh, we’ll come by tomorrow if we aren’t grounded.” Virgil said in a rush as they all raced up stairs.

“Pleasure meeting all of you!” Logan called out as he dashed out the basement door with his friends. The door slammed shut and there was a rumble of feet running across the hall before they heard the front door open and slam shut too.

“Nice kids.” Joan said after a moment of silence.

“Don’t get too attached to them,” Thomas warned as he walked over to the containment unit where the little spider was still scuttling around in “this all has to be taken seriously and professionally. These kids have no idea what going on to them or what they’ve just gotten themselves into so we have to there to guide them.”

“Mmh, are you telling us that or yourself?” Talyn smirked.

Thomas sputtered uselessly, “I-I…wh-what are you talking about?”

“Don’t think we don’t see how you interact with those kids,” Talyn chuckled “all maternal and such.”

“I’m not – it’s not…I don’t do that…” Thomas said meekly, but even he was starting to doubt that “I mean, they’re just kids and I know what it’s like going through what they’re going through. God knows I would have liked a bit of guidance. And they’re also younger then what I was when I first got my powers, we have to keep a careful eye on them.”

“I have a theory,” Joan announced dramatically “that by the end of the week they’ll have you wrapped around their little fingers.”

“Yeah right,” Thomas grumbled “I don’t know if you’ve noticed but I’m not really ‘hip’ with the kids.”

“You’re right, I should give you the benefit of the doubt,” Joan said solemnly “one and a half weeks it is.”

Talyn and Joan laughed while Thomas groaned but it wasn’t because he was frustrated but because he knew Joan was probably right.

Tag:

@immortaldystopia @metaphoricalpluto2 @ultimate-queen-of-fandoms2 @misunderstood-shadow @fairytailtwists @0callmevirge0 @blenderkit17 @galaxy-lilies-main @lumi-1 @paint-in-flames

#thomas sanders #sanders sides #sander sides fanfiction #patton sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #roman sanders #logicality #prinxiety #spiderverse au #tobashiarg!

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surveys-at-your-service · 5 years ago

Text

Survey #241

“where once a heart was beating, nothing but embers glow. our love, it serves as kindling to stoke this flame’s inferno.”

Would you care if your partner did drugs etc? If it was legal here and just for medical purposes, I'd be fine with just weed. Otherwise, I treat the idea the same way as I would a tobacco smoker: no. Has anyone lost their virginity to you? I guess in a gay context? For two females, when is it really... "lost?" Idk. Do you live near a beach? Like... two hours away. Have you ever skipped school just because you were tired? Ha ha, yeah... Do you enjoy going through the car wash? I do, actually. I'm still a little kid when it comes to the rainbow soap, ha ha. Have you done anything embarrassing lately? Oh, I'm sure. How many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now? One. Would you consider painting your bedroom purple? Noooo, it wouldn't be cute y'all. Do you actually wear every shirt in your drawer? Ha, no... mainly because there's a handful of them that I'm working to shrink back into. Then there's others I'm self-conscious of because of color and having hyperhidrosis out the ass. Just wearing black disguises sweat the best. Would you ever get a tattoo on your collar bone? I have one already, but I'm getting it covered at some point. I didn't put much thought into it and has no meaning to me now. I plan on getting the other collarbone tatted too, of course. Are you pregnant right now? Bitch fuck no. Do you still dress up for Halloween? Ugh, no, but only because I can't afford even things to put together my own costume. Not having anywhere to go only further discourages dressing up period. Who was the last male you talked to? My dad. Do you hate cuddling? Hell no, if I like you anyway. Do you have any bruises right now? No. Why did you take the last pill you took? They're my morning prescription meds. My last pill was for anxiety. Could you handle having kids? FUCK no. Nervous breakdowns would happen twice a week, I promise. What outfit makes you feel the most attractive? Attractive? In anything? What a concept. What do you think of people who always wear make-up? You do you, boo. What’s a smell that absolutely makes you gag? Gag, probably vomit. Or feces of some animals. Is there a smell that gives you headaches? GASOLINE. And fresh-cut grass. What do you do while you’re on campus but not in class? Sit in the library doing schoolwork or whatever on my laptop. Do you know anyone who has Autism/Asperger’s syndrome? Yes. Has anyone of the same sex ever hit on you? Yeah. Are you open to a same-sex relationship and why or why not? Yeah; been in one already and I'm still open to dating another girl. What do you think of people who litter and do you? I openly fucking despise you. So obviously not. How much time do you spend online daily? If I'm not in school, I can like... guarantee you I'm on the computer doing at least something. Not always the same site, but I'm somewhere. I absolutely hate how reliant I am on the Internet. Do you wear sunglasses regularly? I never do. I need prescription sunglasses. Who was the last person you called? My mom. Do you own a tablet of any kind? No. Do you tend to put things off until the last minute? OH YES INDEED. What are your parents’ natural hair colors? What is yours? Mom's is brown, and I cannot believe Dad was born with blond hair. HOW does that turn black. I was born dirty blonde. Are you afraid of getting shots? Nah, just the injection is kinda painful with how it burns. Do you hate it when people smoke around you? I very much so hate it. Have you ever wanted to vlog? Noooo, I'm too awkward for that. Always have been. What’s the last piercing you got? Tongue. Do you have a best friend? Ye. What’s your internet homepage? Google. Do you have a shower stall or a bath tub? A tub. When was the last time you saw someone attractive? In person? Idk. What do you hear right now? "I Am Hell" by Machine Head. This time last year, can you remember who you liked? Same person I like now. Did you speak with your father today? No. Are you currently frustrated with someone? No. Name one of your hobbies? Watch YouTube is high up there and like... the only thing I have motivation to do lately. I really hate it. I want my writing will to come back. What is your biggest worry in life right now? My lack of a job. Do you like hot or cold showers? Hot. Are you happy with your relationship status? I don't have a particular feeling about it. What colors would you like to have at your wedding? Depends on the season and the opinion of my spouse, too. How easy was it to get over the person you last dated? It didn't take too long, though it was really because the event left me believing we were, without question, getting back together once we are independent enough to live on our own/mutually move out. It's still possible we may, should life just play out where it works out, but it also was much easier to accept because we're still completely best friends. Have you ever lived with a girlfriend/boyfriend? Not on paper, but pretty much. How old were you when you first smoked weed? But I never have. What is one thing that you’ve done that a lot of people said you couldn’t? Idk; I don't have a lot of unsupportive people in my life. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? Mom. What was the last reason you cried? I listened to a song that deeply triggered my PTSD. Have you ever hated a song, and then later on found that you liked it? Yup, however that works. Did you have a good childhood? It was mostly normal, I guess? Do you play games on your PC? Just World of Warcraft right now. I started Alien: Isolation and Resident Evil 6 FOREVER ago, I just haven't had the motivation to finish either. Do you have a formspring? It's familiar, but I'm actually not sure what that even is. Do you know anyone that is racist? Welcome to the South. Do you have an active sex life? No. Are you defensive about anything? Yes. Have you ever driven 80+ mph? No. Have you ever changed a lightbulb? Yes. Have you ever gotten a bullseye in darts/archery? Darts, possibly. Never done archery. Do you have a Wii? Yeah. Do you own any animals that absolutely hate you? No. What brand is the computer you’re currently on? Acer. Are there any piercings you want but you’re too afraid it will hurt? The pain factor doesn't keep me away from piercings, so no. Do you think ear gauging is gross? When it gets to a certain width, to me anyway, it's pretty ew. I don't judge at all about someone having them, but it can get to a point where it just isn't appealing imo. Are you afraid of anyone in your family? Who and why? No. What’s the last scary movie you saw? Ummmm idk. It's been a long-ass time. I'm sure something in theaters, but I really don't know. Why aren’t you friends with your last ex? We are friends. When did you last spend the night at a friend’s house? A year ago when I was at Sara's. Did you ever watch 2Girls1Cup? Fuck no, I've never even looked into what exactly it is, but I know enough to know I don't wanna fucking see it. Do you have anxiety or depression? *shrugs* Why not both? Have you ever lived in a mobile home? No. Have you ever had your bedroom in a basement? Never even had a basement to begin with lol. Friend asks you to hide drugs, booze etc for them, do you do it? lol no. Animal you like to watch but sort of creeps you out: Big spiders. I particularly like writing spiders/orb weavers though, and watching big spiders eat is just fascinating. Have you entered the Lays create a flavor contest? Oh man how long ago was that??? No. Bagels or English muffins? Bagels gotta win it for me. Who is a family member you look forward to seeing on a holiday? On Christmas especially, I love seeing my niece and nephew because they're just so excited. Brings me back to what it felt like as a little kid. Are Easter baskets only for kids? No. My sisters and I each had super cute baskets that Mom would fill until like... two years ago. Now that it's just me living with her, she'll just usually buy me a candy bar or something. Do you do anything to recognize St Patrick’s Day? No. Do you think nutcracker figurines are creepy or cool? No opinion. Speaking of nuts, do you like them? For the most part, no. There are instances however where I can enjoy like little pieces of them with other kinds of food, ex. chocolate. What do you do when you are nervous? Dead giveaway: I'm kneading/playing with my hands. I pace naturally, but I do so more frequently when I am nervous. I'll have a harder time making eye contact, too. Does your family have an SUV or pick up truck? No. Which of your parents do you laugh more with? Dad. Have you ever been to an open casket wake or funeral? Wake, yes. Who mows the lawn at your house? Some guy Mom knows through the dance studio. Where do you keep your phone at night? Usually to the right of my pillow, a bit far away, and up more towards the headboard. My bed's a queen-size and it's just me, so I have room where I won't hit it. If it has to charge though, then it's on the table beside my bed. Do you feel comfortable asking your parents or grandparents for money? No in almost every case. I'm only somewhat comfortable if it's Mom and I'm asking for like a snack from the gas station or something like that. What’s the last thing you lost? My phone, I think. If you could have your own car or an apartment, which would you choose? An apartment would be entirely useless as I am in no way competent enough to live alone yet, and a car wouldn't have much use seeing as I only have my permit and STILL pretty much never drive. It'd be more useful than an apartment, though. Last time you hid, and why: Uhhhhh. I have zero clue. How do you like your eggs? I'll only ever take them scrambled with cheese. Favorite Mexican food? Quesadillas. Upcoming event you are dreading? I'm happily enjoying it right now, but in another way, I'm dreading school break ending just because I am INCREDIBLY nervous about the effects of it on my legs with the whole muscle atrophy thing. I'm scared of regressing. Do you have a favorite pen? What kind? No. Do you do more surveys during the day or night? The day. Just shampoo, or shampoo + conditioner? Just shampoo. Conditioner adds oil to your hair, and trust me, my hair does NOT need any extra oil. Scariest driver you’ve ridden with: Dad the day he had to pick Nicole and me up from school and we had a 30-minute drive home. Basically, we got home in maybe 15 or less. He was in a fucking awful mood, speeding like hell, running red lights, passing illegally... I was entirely convinced we were going to die that day. Still one of the scariest of my life. Do you think you’re smarter than the average person? If so, why? It depends on the subject matter; in areas such as English, wisdom, stuff kinda like that, honestly yeah. In areas like common damn sense and mathematics, fuck no. What was the last topic you did thorough research on? Why? Paganism. I recently found that Neo-Paganism is the closest description for my spiritual beliefs; it covers such a broad spectrum, and it emphasizes the divinity of nature, free will (so long you are not inflicting harm upon another), the equality of man and woman (plus the beauty of humanity), and one of the concepts of the "ultimate being" includes not an actual deity, but just like this... source of energy and power. I don't even know if I believe it to be conscious, it's just like... the source, and it lies within nature. I'm still doing more and more research into it as I'm thoroughly intrigued, and I continue to feel more at home with its inclusiveness to an array of interpretations. What was the last thing to upset you? So beyond just an annoyance? Probably when this random fucking Facebook post of a father sharing just how proud he was of his son for killing wolves together and sharing purely evil photographs of them playing with/posing the bloody dead bodies (which included making them "snarl" at the camera, and mind you, their mouths were full of blood) popped up on my feed for no goddamn reason. Safe to say, I left a comment and got into a fight with a backwards son of a fuck who thought it was totally kosher to kill these "vermin" and used personal attacks versus logic to try in vain to prove his point, when all he did was accomplish me seeing him as the vermin. Where did you go to the last time you left your house? My sister's house. Do you wear something on your left hand/wrist/arm without fail? Friendship ring with Sara as well as the bracelet she gave me. What is an article of clothing you would never ever wear? Stealing the last answer of jumpsuits. Will you go outside today? Probably not. Are you doing everything you can to make yourself happy? Not everything. I know I could do more. What is a phrase or a saying you try to live by? I don't think I have a set one that I always look to. I refer more to ideas, such as to be unrelenting in your goals. What is something you lie to yourself about? I don't know. I'm not good at that. What has been the best job you’ve ever had? lol What is a holiday, that is NOT celebrated in your country, that you would like to celebrate? Day of the Dead. I know some do celebrate it here, but it's more of a holiday in Mexico. Which nation’s culture (excl. your own) do you find the most interesting? Germany's, from what I remember. We learned quite a bit about them while I took it as a language. They are very serious about honesty and manners. What is something you judge about other people? How you treat others, certain aspects of ones personality (ex., arrogance), and as the previous person stated, to a certain degree anyway, moral/political/religious beliefs. What is something you do not want to discuss? I get really uncomfortable talking about sex, and though no one in my "real" life knows about it (except perhaps Mom due to an outburst during the breakup), I don't like even looking back on the Joel situation. There are also some political things I just don't want to talk about. Do you enjoy solving problems? No, shit's stressful. Are you a kinesthetic, an auditory or a visual learner? Kinesthetic, 100%. Are you an introvert, an extrovert or an ambivert? I'm a pretty strong introvert, though not as much as I once was. I can get lonely kinda quickly now, but I still NEED my alone time. Are you socially anxious or awkward? OH BOY AM I!!!!!!! Do you actually think it’s gross to talk about body functions? NO!!!!!!! This needs needs needs to be normalized because it's stuff we all endure, so we should be comfortable talking about these things, asking questions, etc. Have you ever sent a love letter? Yeah. When you look up at the sky do you ever NOT see a plane or vapor trail? Yeah. Welcome to the country. Do you wear any shoes with holes because you can’t give them up? No. When you go out to breakfast, what do you order? Pretty much always pancakes, scrambled eggs, and bacon. What’s the best compliment you’ve gotten from a boss/teacher? That when she came back to teaching, I was the exact kind of student she hoped for. What’s a weird or interesting nickname you gave someone? lmao the first one that came to mind was Connie's "Einnoc." Is there a phrase or mantra you repeat when you are frightened? No. What are you most envious of? Successful photographers lmao. Do you have a friend with a habit that worries you? Yes. Would you rather have coffee, cocoa, tea, or soda? UGH soda. That's my weaknesses. You could take sweets from me, but I'm pretty reliant on soft drinks. When you walk into your best friend’s room, what do you smell? I don't remember, actually... I haven't been there enough. Have you ever purposely broken something that belonged to a sibling? Wow, no. Have you ever worked at the same place as your best friend? No. Do you like to visit famous people’s homes? I've never done that, and I find it disrespectful anyway. Give celebs their privacy, goddamn. Do you take days off from shaving when you can get away with it? The only thing I shave are my armpits, and considering I don't shower everyday, yes. Every time I do take one however, I always shave. Is there anything hanging on your bathroom walls? No. If your SO agreed, would you want an open relationship? No. Have you ever slept with three people in the same bed? When? Why? At some point, yeah, but not in a romantic context. It was with friends or family when we had limited space. Does your family regularly eat sit down meals together? Pretty much never. Who would you like to slow dance with? To what song? SOBS "The Only Exception" by Paramore w/ Sara continues to sob What’s your favorite pet name someone calls you? None that I have now. If you could talk to one species of animal what would it be? Good question. I guess cats, as I have one and would love to know what he thinks. What’s the largest animal you’ve ever seen in person? An elephant, strolling RIGHT by the fence at the zoo. Have you ever used the change counting machine at a store or mall? Ohhh, I remember those! Yes. Would you give mouth to mouth to your dog to save its life? We have a dog I honestly can't stand, and this is gonna get me mentally punched, but I don't know. NO, not BECAUSE I don't like him, but I don't love him enough to deal with those germs. I don't think I could stomach doing it. If you came with a warning label, what would it say? "Is going to be uncomfortable if you say one word to her but craves friendship anyway." Have you ever tried to learn a language on your own? No. Have you ever had a pet destroy something valuable or important? The thing that upset me the most was when Teddy tore up the corner of one of my art pieces I'm most proud of. I cried. It was weird considering he never really tore up stuff... but alright then. What’s the best burger EVER? UGH I'm weak for Wendy's Baconators. Did you ever show up late for an important event? Probably at some point?

#survey #quiz #questions #random #bored

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squiishiichaos · 6 years ago

Note

Soriku fic in which sora and riku are just chilling on the beach after a rough day

(A rough day? Oof. Okay. Some exhausted Soriku coming your way. Let’s begin.)

_____

Watching Sora collapse back against the dense sand was just the cherry on top of a perfect day, and by perfect, Riku meant horrible in every single way possible.

Their morning had started the same way every morning started these days: up before the sun, forcing a quick breakfast down their throats, and heading off to begin training before the stars had a chance to go out and herald a new day.

In the earliest moments of a dark morning–when the moon was still shining and the sun’s rays just beginning to dip along the horizon in a golden glow–the flash of their keyblades being summoned provided a wakefulness that felt fake after spending half their evening doing the exact same thing.

That’s the burden of being a Master. Riku could still hear the lecture fresh in his mind, even after weeks without Yen Sid saying a word to either of them. After all the hard work they’d both put into training–and, ya know, saving the world–it had felt like a slap in the face. He hadn’t expected a break–still didn’t–but it would be nice if someone didn’t treat them–for once–like this was their first rodeo.

“What’s with that sour face?” Sora asked on a groan as he rolled onto his stomach. Riku was too tired to stifle a laugh at the many sandy grains stuck in his hair. Sora chuckled, too. “Hey! That was a serious question! Don’t try and dodge it!”

“I wasn’t! You’re just covered in sand.”

An impish grin split the Brunet’s lips. “That’s another deflection. C’mon, share with the class!”

Rolling his eyes, Riku stretched his legs out before him and balanced his top half on straight elbows behind him. “Just tired is all. You’d think getting up at the ass-crack of dawn would get easier with time–”

“But it doesn’t.” No, it really didn’t. Not when the two of them went to bed with blisters on their extremities, exhausted and broken. Not even their surplus of potions could help the level of sore they teetered on. “This morning, Donald practically had to drag me out the door. Said if I didn’t get up, he’d go get Roxas and I was not about that life.”

“No, I can’t imagine anyone is, especially after Donald woke him up to wake someone else up. At that point, I’d rather just face the Organization all alone; I’d stand a better chance.”

Sora’s laugh was breathy and soft with only a twinge of the fatigue still latching tight to his normally upbeat voice. “Yeah, he can be scary when he wants to be, but we all can be. You know, I successfully cast ultima the other day.”

“You did? How was it?”

“Terrifying.” Though a smile still captured his lips, the rest of his expression was a barren wasteland. “I almost destroyed Merlin’s study.”

“Really? Wow…” When Riku had tried his hand at that spell, he’d barely managed to dent a table, let alone destroy something. Sora’s really come a long way… “Guess I should add you to my don’t piss off list.”

“Wait, you mean I wasn’t already on it?” He scoffed.

“Why would you be?” Sora sat up in an instant, raining a downpour of sand from the depths of his unruly hair. Atop that normally charged smile was a challenge in cerulean eyes.

It had Riku’s chest clenching with an emotion he really wished would leave him the fuck alone. “Excuse you, I handed you your ass back in the day!”

“Yeah, when we were like fourteen! We both know I win about 99% of our spars–then and now.”

“Because it’s a spar! I don’t wanna hurt you!”

“Excuses, excuses.” Riku watched that pout form from the corner of his eye, obscuring the bright fluorescence of a smile and replacing it with a glare of conviction. Every fiber of his being wanted to reach over and kiss the expression back to sunshine and rainbows–to tell him, just kidding. You’re at the top of all my lists–but he couldn’t.

He just couldn’t. “C’mon, Riku! I can totally–”

“I know you can.” He hoped his attempt at a smile didn’t look lovesick in any way, but who the hell was he kidding? It definitely was. Good thing Sora is so fucking dense. “I’m just teasing.”

“Aww, Riku! But I was looking forward to another spar!”

“How? We’ve literally been sparring all day, and I know for a fact I am not that interesting of a person.”

“I think you’re interesting!” Of course you do. You see the good in everyone. Please, just let me have this one thing. This one reason why you can’t like me. You’re not the one who needs excuses, Sora. “You’ve survived so much!”

“Yeah, and so have you. Everyone’s a survivor of something.” Letting himself fall back against the cooling sands, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

A light shift of sand screamed in his ears, displacing shards in a dip of weight beside his head. Close enough he felt compelled to open his eyes after only a second or two to see what Sora could possibly be doing now.

That.

Was a mistake.

Bright blue sapphires stared back like a second ocean lapping at the shore of his world, drawing him deeper into their waves to drown in the picturesque scene that stopped the gasp where it began in his chest and choked it right back down. Grains of sand counted each rapid beat of his heart in a chaotic descent with each steady, caring breath Sora drew. Bent over him–close enough Riku barely had to lift his hand to caress his cheek–with an elbow bent on either side of his head, that worried grin looked less like a welcome visitor and more like an unwanted intruder.

No sunrise or sunset would ever compare to the sight of Sora this up close and personal. He was his sun. His breath. His life.

God, he…

He loved him.

“Riku…you’re amazing, you know that right?” No, he wasn’t. He was weak. So, so, so, so, so, so weak. “Don’t let those words get you down, okay? I don’t care what Yen Side says. You’ll always be the greatest Master in my heart!”

He was way too close to be saying such things. Especially when Riku’s chest was already too tight to begin with. He wasn’t getting enough oxygen to think clearly, nor his heart functioning well enough to deliver it even if he was.

God, he took his earlier statement back. He’d rather face an angry Roxas than ever deal with this.

And now that he hadn’t answered, Sora just wouldn’t stop! “You’re smart and strong and you’re always so cool! Literally, you’re probably the coolest person here, but you’re also super kind and considerate. Like that time you spent a whole week training with Xion to help her fix her form, or that other time you sat with Aqua all night after she had that nightmare! You’re a really good friend, Riku, and you really shouldn’t put yourself down so–”

He couldn’t take it, anymore. “What about you? You’re a fucking miracle worker, Sora! Stop praising me like I’m the sun when it’s really you!”

“Riku!”

“No! Don’t Riku me! I hear the way you talk about yourself, Sora. Your friends aren’t your only power, they’re just a piece of it. The real seat of that power is you. You’re the one who deserved to be Master–long before I did–and don’t you dare try and refute me! I will literally do everything in my power to shut you up if you even try!”

“But–” Well, can’t say he didn’t warn him.

A part of him expected resistance when his hands flew up to plush cheeks. Expected those brilliant clear skies to widen with the inclement threat of rain clouds. That Sora might reel back in a panic or ask him what the hell he was doing?

But he didn’t. He didn’t say a goddamn word as Riku saw lily green reflected atop still ponds the closer he drew. Didn’t utter a sound or even blink as his eyelids fluttered shut and he slotted their lips together.

This was the moment where it happened.

You know the one.

When the shock wears off and the realization dawns. Where Sora finally gets back into a head space to recognize Riku is kissing him and shove him away. Maybe, if he’s kind enough, he’ll do it hard enough–he knows he can–to smash his skull on the beach and leave him there to bleed out.

But it doesn’t. Fuck!

Great, he thought, I fell asleep again. This is just a dream, right? And when I open my eyes, Sora is going to be drawing–the thoughts died as creamy lids peeled away from solid green and peered at the image of absolute peace. Of dark eyelashes casting shadows where they do not belong below the curve of closed eyes. The hint of a smile still pressed tight to his own line of confusion, threatening to move with him if he dares take that leap.

And when he drew back–breathless and terrified–he didn’t miss the trace of disappointment that turned a soft smile right into a frown.

“I’m–”

“If you apologize, I’m gonna practice Ultima on you, I swear to Kingdom Hearts, Riku.”

“But, I–”

“As much as I love watching you babble, Riku, please, just…shut up? For me?” With the first hint of nerves, Sora closed the gap between them this time and pressed into the kiss with a care that betrayed the restraint shaking through the rest of him. Felt it in the fingers that played at the silver strands of his hair where they mingled with the sand and in the hesitant attempt to deepen it.

Riku had imagined this so many different ways–none of them were like this. Most of them ended with him rejected and crying, a few of them with a broken jaw, and one or two with Sora being nice enough to let him dream before he licked his lips and told him, Sorry, Riku, but I don��t feel the same. Can we just be friends?

Never. Not once. Had he ever imagined this.

Maybe that’s why Sora pulled back and looked down at him, blue shaded navy in–was that fear? Of what?! “Riku…this is okay…right?”

“Yes.” Long fingers were in brunet spikes before Sora could even think to respond, dragging him back down and into a bruising liplock as the adrenaline finally took control of his actions. Urged him to ride this wave of confidence with a lap of tongue against pliant lips, practically choking on the grateful sound the Brunet breathed into his mouth.

After memorizing his taste and mapping every inch, he finally drew back far enough to take in a shaky gasp. He almost–almost–gave in when Sora tried to reconnect them, but he kept his grip firm enough and resolve checked in to holding him at bay.

The Brunet groaned and let his forehead fall against his chin in frustration. “Are you serious right now?! Do you know how long I’ve been waiting for this?”

“No. Tell me.”

“Seriously?! Are you just being a jerk again or are you for real?” When blue met green, Riku didn’t waver. The innocent blink that answered him almost stopped his heart. “You really didn’t know?”

“Uh, no. I thought you had it bad for Kairi. Everyone did!”

A bark of a laugh escaped Sora in a sound that hammered at his heart. “Not Donald and Goofy. They’ve seen every embarrassing swoon and lovesick fawn. Believe me, there were a lot.”

“Why didn’t you just tell me?”

“Well…” Blue diverted to the ground as Sora licked his lips and shrugged his shoulders. “I figured, ya know, that you had more important things to–”

“Sora. You are literally the most important thing in my life.”

“Don’t say that–”

“Why not? It’s true.”

“But Riku!” Sitting up so he couldn’t be silenced by more cheap tricks, Sora fell back on his haunches and heaved a sigh. “What’s so great about me?”

“With all due respect,” he muttered while rolling onto his stomach and rising to his hands and knees, glare firmly in place, “don’t you ever say that around me–no, just ever–again.”

“But–”

“Sora, listen. I don’t care what anyone else says. For me, there is no light brighter–no person stronger–than you. When I stole your keyblade and your friends, you still came to get it back and put me in my right mind, and you did. When the idiots at Castle Oblivion tried to wipe your memories and turn you into a puppet, you felled them all and saved my clone at the same time! You not only defeated an entire horde of heartless and nobodies–by yourself!–but you also helped defeat Xemnas and were willing despite everything to spend the rest of your life with me in the realm of darkness if it meant protecting your friends. So, please, don’t you dare ask me again, what’s so great about me, because the answer is everything.”

“Wow…” A shy laugh fell off familiar lips as Sora crossed his legs and seated his arms between them like a child looking up at their idol. A bright smile captured his expression and lit his eyes like the mid-day ocean glittering just feet from them. “I think that’s the most I’ve ever heard you say, Riku.”

“A…are you serious? That’s what you got from all that?”

Kind eyes squeezed shut in a wide, toothy grin as his head tilted a little bit to the side. No camera in the world could hope to capture that much beauty. “And that you love me!”

“Sora!”

A giggle fell off the Brunet’s lips as he gracefully jumped to his feet and pivoted toward the wide-open beach around them. “C’mon, Riku! Last one to our Special Place is the loser!” Without even waiting for him to stand up, he took off with a hearty laugh and another of those heart-stopping smiles over his shoulder.

With a shake of his head, Riku slowly got to his feet and scratched the sand from his hair. “How did I fall for such an idiot?”

“Hey! Apologize you meanie!”

A smirk shifted his expression just before a laugh tore through it. “Only if you beat me. Think you can manage that, Sora?”

“Bring it on!”

And together, they raced off along the sunlit stretch of beach.

#sora #riku #soriku #prompt time #my writing #didn't edit this #because it is perfect #so I'm gonna edit it posthumously #wish me luck #fuck

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threemoonsareshining · 7 years ago

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i think you're such a cool person can you do as many as you'd like of the get to know you asks? i couldn't choose! i'm just desperate to know you lol

Hi anon! There are a lot of asks and I’m not that cool but I’m sad and bored again so I’ll do as many as I can.

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? I don’t think I’ve ever really held hands for real with anyone but I’m pretty sure the last time was about a week ago with one of my best friends bc we were in a place with lots of people and we didn’t want to get lost 2. Are you outgoing or shy? I’m the shyest person I know (actually no, I know a girl who is even shyer than me but I’m pretty close)3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? Not to sound cheesy or anything but I really want to see this guy I had something weird going on with not because of any special reason I just want to know where things are going4. Are you easy to get along with? I’d like to say I am but actually it’s really really hard to keep in touch with me and I’m not good at making conversation at all6. What kind of people are you attracted to? First of all, I’m not usually attracted to people at all, I don’t know why and when I am I always ask myself “girl why this one exactly?” and honestly, I don’t know. There are just some persons I feel comfortable with in a specific way and then attraction grows from there idk I’m really not used to being attracted to anyone9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Extremely10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? A friend of mine when I was really drunk at his house waiting for my parents to pick me up. I don’t really remember what we talked about but it felt very nice.11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? it says “no da miedo hihihi” which translates to “it’s not scary hihihi”12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? right now I can’t stop listening to Fiji Water by Owl City (i’m so excited he’s releasing new music!), Your Mother’s Eyes, Rythm and Blues and Take a Walk by The head and the heart and It’s only life by The Shins.13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? I like it because it feels so so relaxing but at the same time it makes me anxious because I think that the more people touch it the dirtier and more damaged it gets and as a person who spends a considerable amount of time on my hair, that is not so nice15. What good thing happened this summer? I went to a festival in the town next to mine and I got to see all my friends after a long time and I had such a good time my heart hurts every time I think about it16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Yess (idk if it’s bc I really like him or I just want to kiss someone)18. Do you still talk to your first crush? No! Actually I saw him a few months ago after… 6 years and we looked at each other like “are you who I think you are?”. I never really talked to him, he treated me like shit and he’s responsible for many of my insecurities so I believe it’s better this way hah21. What are you bad habits? I don’t sleep, I don’t pay as much attention as I should to my loved ones, I forget to eat and shower and I scratch my face like there’s no tomorrow my friend23. Do you have trust issues? Hell yeah I do. Literally everyone I knew left me when I was like 15 or so which is, you know, a crucial stage of your emotional development and stuff so since then I’ve never got close to anyone because what better strategy than not to be invested enough in a relationship so if it ends you don’t feel so bad about it!25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? My ears for sure. They stick out so that’s why I never wear my hair up in public. I thought about getting surgery but I want to stay true to myself and stuff.28. Who are you most comfortable around? I’m not 100% comfortable with anyone but I guess my best friend is a strong candidate.30. Do you ever want to get married? I never think about that because my brain always tells me “first find someone who is actually willing to marry you and then we’ll think about it”31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? It’s long enough for 6 ponytails if you put your mind into it34. Do you play sports? What sports? Sports are bad and I hate them36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? I liked this guy for like 6 years and I literally never spoke a word to him but I think the way I looked at him made it pretty obvious (I guess that’s why he avoided me all the time)37. What do you say during awkward silences? I’m the Queen of awkward silences and I’ve learnt that it’s ok to not say anything. Or I’ll just sigh a lot.39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? Don’t make me think about shops rn bc I spent the whole afternoon trying to find something to wear to the 5 million Christmas dinners I have and everything was either too expensive, too ugly or just looked terrible on me so yeah I’m pretty mad40. What do you want to do after high school? I wanted to study something arts-related like filmmaking, music or dance, you know, the only things I actually used to enjoy but instead of that I decided to study economics because I hate myself41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? I think this depends on the circumstances but in my opinion and taking into account my own experience I’ll always give a second chance, maybe not immediately but eventually, I will.42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean? It means I’m being me haha43. Do you smile at strangers? I try to but it’s scary45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? I have no reason to get out of bed in the morning besides the fact that if I stop doing the things I should do I’ll never be able to catch up and everyone will go on with their lives while I stay the same and become mediocre and that’s just inconceivable to me. So basically I don’t live for myself but for the expectations people have of me.48. Have you ever been drunk? Yes and I wish I was rn honestly49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? Yes and since I don’t want to tell anyone I won’t say what it is52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? I wish I wasn’t worried about literally everything because it’s so tiring and it keeps me from thinking about more important stuff64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? About a month ago I was at this party and everyone was telling me one of my friends I had been talking to for a while wanted to hook up with me and I kinda wanted to too but I’m too shy and anxious to make any moves so I got drunk, and after avoiding him like 6546 times (bc I was really worried I would look stupid not bc I didn’t want to) I finally kissed him in front of an entire crowd of strangers and all my friends found out about it right afterwards so it was like a public event and I felt really exposed so yeah it wan’t ideal~ but also not the worst (I cringed so much while writing this, it was so awkward my god)69. Are you watching tv right now? Not right now but I’m about to watch the new episode of Crazy ex-girlfriend 72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 2, one for my head and other by my side to keep me some company (I’m so lonely oh my god)73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? A shar-pei puppy dog I have since I was born (it’s so so cute I love it his name is wrinkles)75. Favourite animal? Cats are not only my favourite animals but one of my favourite things on earth78. Favourite ice cream flavour? since ice cream is my favourite food I can’t really choose one flavour (anything but banana flavour tho)81. Favourite tv show? GoT and Mr Robot I can’t choose but there are so many82. Favourite movie? Billy Elliot86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? Bruce the shark, he deserves more recognition94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? I own lots of sweaters because you can never own enough sweaters (until you run out of space in your closet which is what’s happening to me)95. Last movie you watched? Tulip Fever. Not one of my favourites but last night I felt like watching some historic drama and romance shit (love it every once in a while). Alicia Vikander and Dane Dehaan tho98. Do you tan a lot? I used to but since I rarely leave my room during the summer I’ve become The Pale Friend™ 99. Have any pets? Two cats and I used to have fish but they weren’t my thing and I decided that no more fish would die because of me (I really tried but they just didn’t survive idk why)100. How are you feeling? I’m feeling really anxious right now and I can’t sleep. Partly it’s because I’ve got a lot of papers to write and a presentation on Monday and none of them are going especially well tbh, but there’s something else that is making me feel extremely uneasy and bad about myself and idk what it is but I’d like it to stop thank you very much102. Do you regret anything from your past? I regret not being able to enjoy these last 3 or 4 years of my life because they could’ve been some of the best years of my life but I was so full of sadness and hatred I just couldn’t pay attention to anything else108. What should you be doing? sleeping since 1 am but it’s 4 am and here we are115. Do you play the Wii? Who would I be without Just dance and Animal Crossing 116. Are you listening to music right now? yes, Rainbow Veins by Owl City (how unexpected)117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? I had that for dinner and it was beautiful118. Do you like Chinese food? The other day I cried tears of happiness because my mom ordered Chinese food for lunch119. Favourite book? Memorias the Idhún120. Are you afraid of the dark? Not so much now but not so long ago I would get what now I can consider almost panic attacks because the dark made me feel so anxious. I’d stay paralysed in my bed, feeling my arms numb and I can swear I heard stuff in my head and I got the feeling that I was literally dying.126. Are you currently bored? A little (these are a lot of questions but I want to finish them now)129. What your zodiac sign? Taurus131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? This is happening right now and I don’t like him that way so I just try to keep everything the same but also I try to keep the distances so he doesn’t misinterpret things (this makes me feel so bad for him sometimes but I’m trying to make him see that not liking him romantically doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy being with him). Let’s hope it works.133. Favourite lyrics right now? “I’ve been down the very road you’re walking now / It doesn’t have to be so dark and lonesome / It takes a while but we can figure this thing out / And turn it back around” from It’s only life by The Shins.137. How tall are you? 164cm which I think is 5,3 feet138. Curly or Straight hair? My hair is curly af and it’s very inconvenient for… life you know140. Summer or Winter? Summer because of the holidays winter because of the feeling141. Night or Day? Night145. Tea or Coffee? Tea but coffee has been saving my life these past weeks146. Was today a good day? Today was a wasted and disappointing day.150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? “Con Elodin nunca se sabe —dije—. Si no está loco, es el mejor actor que he conocido jamás” from The Wise Man’s Fear. It translates to something like “’Who can say with Elodin?’ I said. ‘If he isn’t crazy, he’s the best actor I’ve ever met.’”

Congrats if you’ve managed to read all this without unfollowing me 🍃🍃🍃⛄️⛄️⛄️

#ask #long post #bless u anon #sorry for the grammar mistakes #i'm just tired

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thewritersintent-blog · 6 years ago

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13 Ghosts 3: The Bound Woman

I’m back!! The third installment in the 13 part Thirteen Ghosts rewrite. I’ll be on this more - updating the story monthly and posting book reviews. Promise!

Trigger Warnings: graphic depiction of violence.

Word Count: 6,110

October 18, 2004

It was cold, far colder than southern California had any right to be. Merle glanced out the window of Fallyn’s apartment, tightly wrapped in a thick blanket, and clutching a warm cup of matcha. She watched the sky - a pale, almost translucent blue - for a moment before turning her attention back to the television. The film was frozen, paused at some absurd time. Of course when it started to get interesting, Fallyn had to run to the bathroom. Merle shifted in her cocoon and gazed absentmindedly at the room - the overwhelming collection of movies, medical books stacked haphazardly on a small, stuffed bookcase amongst fake plants and action figures, and a big blue armchair diagonally from her, plush with far too many pillows and blankets. She had been excited to come over, to watch the movie. Now she was tired, a sleepy sort of drunk from the high of watching the highly anticipated film.

The bathroom door opened, and Fallyn came out, drying her hands. She smiled at Merle and adjusted her sweatshirt. Merle rolled her eyes.

“Ready?”

Merle responded by staring at the television. Her sister laughed quietly.

“It’s not like I was in there a long time.”

“I know.” Merle rubbed her arms.

Fallyn raised an eyebrow. “Are you cold?”

Merle looked at her. Eyebrow still raised, Fallyn walked over to the armchair and grabbed a green blanket, putting it over her sister’s shoulders. “See,” she said, “if you were smart, you’d remember to dress warmer.”

“I am smart.”

“Not enough to remember you’re always cold.”

Merle grumbled and tightened the second blanket around herself. Fallyn laughed. She made her way into the small kitchen off to the side of the living room, and began rummaging around for popcorn. Merle watched her, eyes glazing over as she thought about her own movements, how she had made lunch while her sister started the first movie in their marathon. It was eery how similar they are; how they were almost identical in action as well as their face. Dark hair, thick eyebrows, high cheekbones, tan skin, and a prominent nose from their father’s side. She should have worn her hair different, worn something other than her sweatshirt and jeans. It’s not that she didn’t love or like Fallyn; more that she felt like a copy, a duplicate Fallyn. Most agreed, thinking if Fallyn liked sports, so did Merle; if her favorite color was pink, so was Merle’s; if Fallyn thought blondes were cute, so did Merle. They were not seen as compliments or even equals, but mirror images of one another.

“Okay, out of everything we’ve seen so far - what was your favorite?”

Merle blinked. Fallyn was leaning over the counter, head cocked. The popcorn slowly spun in the microwave, occasionally popping.

“What was yours?”

Fallyn snorted. “You don’t have one?”

Merle shrugged. She didn’t have favorites, Fallyn knew that. She had a top twenty that was never consistent and nothing was ordered; one and twenty held the same significance.

“I like the second movie - the Japanese one. ‘Jo-on.’ Something like that,” Fallyn answered.

“‘Ju-on’?”

“Yeah.” The microwaved let out two long beeps. Fallyn turned, pulled out the popcorn - cursing as she jerked her hand back - and flung it into a bowl. She carefully opened it, flinching as her hand touched the hot bag.

“What did you like about it?”

“It was...different.” Fallyn tossed the bag into the sink. “I don’t know a lot about Japanese stories, so it was kinda cool to see that. Their ghosts are different than ours.”

“I think they’re called ghouls.”

“That’s so cool.” Fallyn walked over, and flopped onto the couch, popcorn bouncing out of the bowl. “It’s terrifying though, isn’t it?”

“What is? The ghouls?”

“No - I mean, yeah, the ghouls, but the whole premise of it.” Merle glanced at her. Fallyn looked thoughtful as she shoved a handful of popcorn into her mouth. She offered the bowl to Merle; she took a couple pieces. Her mouth still full she continued, “one person’s cruelty leads to a cycle of vengeance that spreads out - it’s like...a virus or something. You know those, uh, graphics that show the spread of something?”

“Viruses spread?”

“Yeah, but I mean -?”

“Like disaster zones from ground zero?”

“Yes!”

Merle nodded, thinking. “It’s a bunch of bull, though.” Fallyn frowned. She turned fully and stared at Merle. “I mean, I have no doubt the ghouls are real -” Fallyn snorted “-not the ones in the movie! I mean the concept! Like Dracula isn’t real, but that doesn’t mean vampires aren’t. I was talking about the cycle of vengeance thing. It’s not real. It’s crap.”

“Like Dracula?”

“Yeah.” She knew her sister was laughing at her. It didn’t matter. “The saying is ‘an eye for an eye.’ That’s where it ends. Someone hurts you, then you hurt them back. Everything’s done. Over with. Finished.”

“The saying is ‘an eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind,” Fallyn corrected. “And I think that’s a Western thing, not Japanese.”

“Still,” Merle argued, “I don’t think ghosts or ghouls or even living people go around sucking others into their misfortune. I think they take their revenge, and then -” she makes a gesture, like waving something off.

Fallyn shrugged, picking up the remote to play the film. “You think what you want, Mer,” she said. “It’s still scary as shit to me.”

***

January 27, 2006

This isn’t what she would have wanted. Too much black, too...what’s the word? Started with an M...mel...Maleficent? No, melancholy. Maleficent was - she wallowed. She had been her third favorite Disney villain, though she could have been her tenth or second. Merle was odd like that. Had been. Was. She would be pissed about all this.

A small smile crossed Fallyn’s face. It felt unnatural, as though she hadn’t spent the last twenty years of her life laughing and smiling and enjoying life. If anyone had torn their gaze away from the casket and saw her face - if they could have bared it - they would have thought she looked like a grotesque clown, a sick grin painted on her face. That would have made Merle laugh. She hated - had hated - these things. Funerals were boring. “Take me to New Orleans,” she had once proclaimed. They had been thirteen at the time. “I wanna be buried above ground, in one of those fancy coffins, with catnip surrounding my grave. People will remember me as Bast -”

“Sekhmet!” Fallyn had chimed in, cackling.

“Bast and Sekhmet! The cat queen!” Merle had looked at Fallyn, her eyes twinkling. “Promise me, Lyn. No sadness - fun music, lacy umbrellas, and cats. No black, only rainbows.”

Fallyn had continued laughing, though it had started to feel forced. “We - we shouldn’t be saying this!”

“Why not? I wanna look down and think - that’s a party!”

They had laughed, laughed so hard they clutched each other, gripping their stomachs. Fallyn’s hands started to shake and she held onto her bag. She swallowed, a dull roaring in her ears like being under water. No, she would not cry. Merle hadn’t wanted tears at thirteen; she most certainly would not have tears at twenty.

August 13, 2015

The car ride was quiet, only the sounds of AC/DC crackling through the radio filled the space as the car rolled into the parking lot. It looked more like it was on its way to a funeral rather than a birthday adventure. Fallyn scowled, then softened her expression. ‘Birthday adventure.’ What a weird phrase.

It hadn’t been her idea to come here. She enjoyed spelunking, cave diving, skydiving - really, anything to do with climbing and pulleys and harnesses, but today...today she didn’t want to do anything. She had voiced her plans to Ashley Harding, another nurse at the hospice facility she worked at. Stay-in, watch a movie or two, drink a few gallons of hot chocolate - she wasn’t a drinker in the alcoholic sense, never had been - then go to bed. Ashley had scoffed before announcing she would take her spelunking, her treat. “You can’t just sit around - you’re thirty! That’s a milestone!” What milestone, Fallyn wasn’t so sure. She was sure that getting a job with your friend from college was a stupid choice.

She should have said no, told Ash that she didn’t want to do anything. But she had relented. It had been eleven years. She could go out for one birthday.

Ashley paid the parking fee from the driver’s seat, then drove onward, slowly through the parking lot. She eventually found a spot and proudly announced they were here. The radio turned off with the car engine. The sudden silence woke Lauren Willard - a mutual friend from college and Ashley’s current roommate - with a loud snort.

“We’re here?” she slurred.

“Yup!” Ash punctuated the ‘P’ with a definitive pop. She unlocked the doors, hopped out and stretched. Everyone else followed suit. Fallyn looked around.

The parking lot was nothing interesting. It was relatively small, gravelly and gray, but it was secured. A tiny ticket booth at the entrance with a sign displaying the prices for admission. Another much larger sign stood opposite from the booth, across the lot, marking the entrance to the forest, the park they would soon go into. Fallyn couldn’t make it out, but she imagined it boasted about the park’s history and stated a few rules, like no dogs and to keep to the trails.

Outside the little lot, it was lovely. She took a deep breath. Fresh and clean, the way cold water tastes on a hot, dry day. The surrounding trees were brightly green in the last stages of summer. Everything seemed patient, as though waiting for something - for them? It was eerie, though whether that was the early morning mist coasting along the ground of the park itself, Fallyn wasn’t so sure.

Ash popped open the trunk and they grabbed their gear.

“Beautiful, right?” Elysiah baker asked. She had slept the entire ride over - like Lauren - and the sleep seemed to have done her good. Here eyes were sparkling, and the bags under them - dark and heavy when they picked her up - had faded into something a little worn, but not torn, like an over-washed shirt compared to a ripped up, paint-splattered one.

Fallyn smiled and picked up her bag. It felt a little forced, but no one commented on it. Elysiah nudged her. “Let’s go celebrate your big day, huh?”

“Yeah,” Fallyn said, as Ash locked the car. The four of them made their way to the park entrance, Lauren stretching and yawning all the while. “Let’s.”

November 2, 2004

He had no name until he met Merle. Until Merle was found. Up until then, he could have been anyone. He was no one. From a spec, barely noticeable in the history of humankind to the boogeyman people warned their children about. From a little nobody to Michael Myers. A dream come true.

His face was unremarkable, hair unexciting, clothes simple. The perfect monster. Fallyn stared at his image on her parent’s TV, transfixed. Her mother had gone upstairs, unable to watch the news. She didn’t want to see his face, didn’t want to know his name. She just wanted him gone, punished. Her father stayed, sitting in his armchair, jaw clenched. Fallyn probably looked like him: thick eyebrows furrowed, thin lips twisted in anger and disgust, dark eyes piercing those blues as though they could see each other through the screen.

The newscaster was speaking. “Rhett Woodward Hewitt was arrested today for the murder of Merle Allison Crane. Crane, the daughter of first generation Dutch-French immigrants, was nineteen years old when she had been approached by Hewitt at the clothing store she worked at.” They played the surveillance tape as they had for the last week. Out of the corner of her eye, Fallyn say her father turn his face, pushing his fist up towards his mouth. His dark eyes glistened. She didn’t look away - she wouldn’t. She watched as a black and white image of Merle waved Rhett Woodward Hewitt off. The footage was blurry, but there was no mistaking her, from her new bob to her favorite bag with the Disney villain keychains. Fallyn focused in on Rhett Woodward Hewitt - unextraordinary then as he was now.

“Police believe Hewitt followed Crane’s car, ramming his vehicle into hers until she swerved off the road.” Highway cameras - dull and blurry - showed the black truck following the little gray Honda. The newscaster cut between several cameras showing their commute - Merle must have been terrified - before returning to Rhett Woodward Hewitt’s image. They had no video of the accident. He had been clever - ramming her car off the road when they were off the highway and onto the dirt road that led towards the house. A pang hit Fallyn. A dull roaring sounded in her ears and she swallowed, closed her eyes, and then forced herself to look. “Hewitt killed Merle and attempted to hide her body by burying her vertical in the ground. Her family - father, fifty-one year old Robert Crane, mother, fifty-seven year old Febe, and Merle’s twin sister Fallyn - reported her missing that night. Police found her body three days later, two miles outside her family home.” Another pang, sharper this time. She had been so close, so close to home. Just a minute or two longer and she…

Fallyn swallowed again. Her father had turned back towards the TV, his hand still covering his mouth. The screen changed back to a video of Rhett Woodward Hewitt being led inside the jail. The newscaster continued for a minute more, mentioning his age - thirty-five - his employment - self-employed - and how long he had lived in California - since he was nineteen. Fallyn watched him, unassuming in everything. He glanced at the cameras around him, a small smile playing at his lips. Her lips curled in disgust. The roaring grew louder, thundering in her ears, as the newscaster announced the date of the trial.

AUGUST 13, 2015

They reached the entrance of the cave. It had taken ten minutes of walking - not that she had minded. There was something soothing, relieving about the forest. The smell, the sound of dirt and rocks crunching under her boots - it was calming. Fallyn’s shoulders softened, her strides quickening, and her frown slowly falling before twisting up into some dreamlike smile.

The cave was large and supposedly very deep. The dark reds and browns of the cave seemed to invite her in, asking her to see them, explore them. It opened itself to her and the others. She ran her hand along the mossy rocks outside of the cave. Beautiful.

“Holy shit, this is nice,” Elysiah exclaimed. She stood near Fallyn, hands on her hips, grinning. Lauren, a few feet behind them, looked the cave entrance up and down before turning to a sweaty Ashley.

“You’ve done this one, right?”

“Would I take you somewhere I haven’t gone?”

There was silence, only interrupted by the crunching of their boots and birds chirping. Ashley grinned wider. “Okay - maybe I would, but not today! Today is about Lyn - and not scaring Lauren.”

“I’m not scared,” she said quietly. She didn’t seem to be talking to anyone in particular. Elysiah put her arm around her shoulders.

“It’ll be fun,” she said. She looked at the other two and gestured. “Well...lead the way.”

JANUARY 5, 2005

There was no way, no way this could be their defense. Fallyn sat between her mother and father, staring at Rhett Woodward Hewitt’s lawyer - James Scott, a man who smirked whenever the press referred to him as the Devil’s Advocate. The room was in a strained silence, hanging onto Scott’s words, thinking about what he had just claimed. It was ridiculous.

Scott fought back a smirk, and continued. “What is your relationship with Roswell?”

Rhett Woodward Hewitt shrugged. It was offensive how plain he was. Fallyn would

never have noticed him - no one would have had he not...Even his suit was unremarkable; black and baggy, it left everything to the imagination. He was a stark contrast to the brilliantly and rather obnoxiously dressed James Scott in his dark green bespoke suit and bright tie. That shouldn’t be allowed - in court or anywhere; most lawyers wore something basic, black or navy, to keep the case on their clients and their arguments. Not James Scott. Not the Devil’s Advocate.

“We don’t talk much,” Rhett Woodward Hewitt continued. Scott nodded solemnly.

“And why is that?”

“He’s...to tell you the truth, he’s a little odd.”

“In what way?”

“Ros...he’s always been attracted to the violence of things. Like breaking animals.

Hurting them, making them cry. Liked horror movies too - always got a little giddy at the gross bits.”

“And you didn’t?”

Rhett Woodward Hewitt swallowed and looked down at his lap. What a wonderful actor. “No,” he said quietly. “I...it scared me. I liked the...the frights...but never...never the gore.”

James Scott turned to the jury, eyebrows upturned into some mockery of sympathy.

“The prosecution claims that my client, Mr. Rhett Woodward Hewitt, killed Merle

Crane. The only evidence they had been able to procure has been a murky video at the store and on the highway. There were no prints at the scene - no DNA on Miss Crane’s person. The knife, as you know,” he gave a small smile to the jury, as though sharing a joke with them, “was discovered five miles from the body, blood matching that of Miss Crane, and fingerprints alleging my client as the killer. I propose that it was not in fact Mr. Rhett Woodward Hewitt who killed her, but his twin brother, Roswell Winthrop Hewitt.”

There was a murmur in the courtroom. Fallyn snorted and glared. There was no way anyone would believe this. Maybe the video evidence, but the physical? It was Rhett Woodward Hewitt’s fingerprints on the knife, his truck that followed her. The lawyer said Roswell had an alibi; Rhett did not. This little twist belongs on a TV show, not in real life. She glared at Rhett Woodward Hewitt His eyes remained fixed in his lap, brows furrowed sadly. The corner of his mouth turned upward, just slightly.

AUGUST 13, 2018

The climb was quiet. Not oppressive or dense, just...quiet. Water dripped off rocks and splashed onto the small pools they walked through. It was musky, like old, wet dirt and bat guano. The walls were slimy and rough; Lauren had been convinced she had run her hand through guano and had begged Elysiah for her gloves. Their boots splashed and crunched and skid through the water and across the rocks.

Ashley led the group, pausing every few minutes to double check her map. Elysiah was

behind her, followed by Fallyn, and lastly, Lauren. Fallyn had suggested Lauren go in the middle, but she had refused, finding comfort in being behind the others; the way she said it was like she was conquering her own fear, as though she was afraid of something grabbing her and could only be safe from the back of the line.

A couple of tight squeezes, and Ash announced they would soon need to break out their rope gear. “It’s not too far,” she explained calmly. Lauren looked petrified, like she didn’t realize what the rope they brought would be used for. “The rope just gives us a little extra...stability to get down.”

Lauren looked uncertain. Fallyn put her hand on her shoulder, careful of a patch of gunk

on her jacket. “I’ll go first,” she said quietly. “It’ll be better once you see me - see us doing it.”

She nodded though she did not look convinced. Fallyn gave her a smile and followed after Ashley and Elysiah, hearing the splash of Lauren behind her.

To be honest, she wasn’t entirely sure why Lauren had come. She was scared of almost everything - no, that wasn’t true. She was scared of anything that could be dangerous, labeled adventurous. To Lauren, ‘adventurous’ was a code word for ‘stupid actions that lead to one’s death.’ Merle thought like that.

Fallyn blinked, scrunching up her nose. No. She would not think about her. Not right now. She tried to focus on the walls - swirling mixture of burnt orange, red, brown, and yellow. Like a sunset trapped underground. Fallyn ran her hand along the wall, cataloging its texture under her glove. She stared for a moment, the contrast between her black glove and the wall, illuminated by her headlamp, drawing her back into her own mind, before she glanced back at Lauren, and pressed onward.

FEBRUARY 2, 2005

“Rhett Woodward Hewitt has been released from prison. Hewitt was arrested in January for the murder of nineteen year old Merle Crane of Los Angeles, California. His lawyer, James Scott, stunned the court on January fifth, claiming that the police had apprehended the wrong man. In a twist fit for TV, police took DNA samples from both Hewitt and his twin brother, Roswell Winthrop Hewitt, and confirmed they had indeed put the wrong man on trial. While Roswell Hewitt is now facing charges, Rhett Hewitt is suing the state for damages, with James Scott once again as his lawyer.”

OCTOBER 25, 2005

She shouldn’t be here. Fallyn sat in the park, facing the playground. Her eyes were glazed over, vacant, not really seeing the children running around while their parents watched. A book was opened in her lap, but she hadn’t turned the page in over ten minutes. She had the distant feeling that parents were looking at her oddly, but she didn’t pay attention. She shouldn’t be here.

His house was almost a mile away from the park. That’s why she had stopped here. One last stop before - before what? What exactly was she going to do?

Her chest felt tight and she swallowed. It had seemed simple. It was simple. So why was she still here?

Fallyn tapped her hand against her knee for a moment. She bit her lip. Her eyes seemed to harden as she sat up a little straighter before picking up her bag and book, and leaving the park.

AUGUST 13, 2015

Ashley attached the rope around her waist. With a smile to the other three women, she carefully scaled down the side of the cave. It wasn’t too far down - maybe twenty-five feet at the most. However, it was better for them to be cautious than...well, than dead.

She reached the next level of the cave floor, her boots skidding on the damp rocks. She quickly regained her balance and grinned up at them.

“See,” she said, “it’s not hard.”

Ash unhooked herself from the ropes. Elysiah pulled them up and set about hooking herself into them. They had agreed to climb down in the order they had been walking: Ashley, Elysiah, Fallyn, then Lauren. The other three were used to this; the order was more for Lauren’s benefit.

Elysiah tugged on the ropes, double checking their tightness, and prepared to climb down. Lauren watched her, eyes wide.

Fallyn looked at the ropes secured into the rock at her feet. It was strong. And yet...an eerie feeling started to seep into her bones. She felt like someone was watching them.

She looked around, careful to seem interested in the damp walls so not to frighten Lauren. Fallyn peered back the way they came, but could see nothing. No one was there besides them, or rather, no one was this far into the cave as they were.

She frowned. They hadn’t strayed off the path. She squinted, turning up the brightness on her headlamp. It cast the rocks into shadow, sharp and dark. It looked more menacing this way, all sharp angels and dramatic lighting. She stared. Nothing came out of the shadows, from behind the rocks. There was the faint sound of water dripping.

Fallyn rubbed her hand along the rock - a sort of stabilizer - and took a breath. Bat guano and damp earth melted on her tongue. She grimaced, but took another breath. She had just started calming down when this unease hit, like the universe was reminding her that she was once again spending her birthday without Merle. Like it was punishing her for daring to move on.

There was a thump, and she turned back around, dimming her headlamp. Elysiah had reached the bottom. She unhooked herself and allowed Lauren to pull the ropes up with shaking fingers. The two women on the next level pulled out their water bottles and took a drag.

Fallyn gently took the rope from Lauren, and slipped it into the hook around her waist.

“You’ll be fine,” she whispered. She wasn’t sure who she was telling this to. Lauren nodded, her eyes transfixed on to Fallyn’s belt. Fallyn turned the headlamp back onto full blast, keeping her head tilted down as she adjusted her belt.. She was slow, methodical, aware of how her fingers blocked the lights and Lauren’s sight.

With one last knot, she finished. She gave a small smile to Lauren and turned to scale down the cave. Her stomach flipped. She glanced over her shoulder. Nothing. Lauren made a sound, and Fallyn quickly turned back to her.

“It’s fine. Watch.”

She turned fully and - a shadow flashed across the cave. Fallyn’s eyes widened, but she was already partially off the edge, the toes of her boots the only thing still on the cliff. She fell back, her mouth open, no sound coming forth.

With a gasp, Fallyn grabbed onto the rope, suspending herself. She looked up. Lauren stared down at her, eyes frantic. Below her, Elysiah and Ashley were on their feet, staring up at her.

“I’m fine,” she called out. Fallyn swallowed and looked back up at Lauren. She gave what she hoped was an assuring smile and, adjusting her grip on the rope, begin the descend.

Something flashed in her peripheral vision. She would not look. It was a bat. They were all over.

Fallyn sniffed. Her eyebrows furrowed. She sniffed again. There was something musky - not like dirt or animal droppings, but man-made. The kind of smell that companies packages and sold to men as desirable. She inhaled and looked to her right, then left. She looked up at a Lauren, and then back down.

The smell got stronger. Her hands started to slip.

“Fallyn?” Lauren. Fallyn blinked, her friend’s voice doing little to ease her.

She looked up and there he was. Unassuming, unremarkable. A face in the crowd. Fallyn’s eyes widened and she opened her mouth. He said nothing. He didn’t move. He just stared. Her hands slipped.

Falling, falling, falling. A sharp tug at her waist. She was screaming - there was screaming. Hysterical, vibrating off the walls. She skid - but she wasn’t on the ground. Her feet dangled, kicking. He was there - how was he there? No ropes around his waist, nothing to keep him at Fallyn’s height. He wrapped the rope around her neck and pulled taut, up towards Lauren.

She couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t breathe.

He said nothing. His mouth curled and he leaned in. She could smell him: it was in his clothes, on his skin, cloying against the scent of fresh blood, bright and copper.

“An eye for an eye,” he whispered, his voice dull, oddly feminine.

She gasped and pulled at her neck. The others were frantic, she could feel it. He was stronger. She looked at him, her eyes wet and bloodshot. He smiled.

“An eye for an eye. An eye for an eye.”

The world faded. Fallyn fell limp.

“An eye for an eye.”

AUGUST 13, 2015

It had taken for too long for her body to be retrieved. Police and firefighters and paramedics spent a full forty-five minutes trying to figure out how they were going to take her body out of the cave. They finally decided the other two - Lauren, with the forceful encouragement of her friends, had left to call 911 and was outside the cave, wringing her hands and hyperventilating - would have to drag her back. Several were concerned about the mental wellbeing of the other two women, but could not offer a better solution.

Two hours later, all four women were out of the cave.

Elysiah Baker, Ashley Harding, and Lauren Willard were taken to their car. Each was wrapped in a shock blanket. Ashley was numb, her eyes staring at nothing, almost resigned to what she had witnessed.

Fallyn was quickly assessed by paramedics before being placed in a black bag. The sight of her being zipped up was too much for Elysiah, and she screamed, wailing as fresh tears fell down her cheeks.

AUGUST 13, 2018

She watched them from some distance, not quite hiding, but not out in the open either. She stood between the trees, watching as their car pulled into the gravel parking lot. They have done this for the last three years. Same time. Same place. She had been shocked the first time, but now it was simply customary. She felt no emotion, nothing at all, as the doors opened.

They had changed in the last few years. The first year, they had been easily recognizable. Now...there was something off. It was like meeting someone you hadn’t seen in a long time: they may have the same smile or laugh, but their hair was different, their eyes a little sadder. Ashley’s blonde hair was longer, twisted in a low braid; she hadn’t worn her hair in a high ponytail since that day, almost as though she blamed the hair. More likely, she associated the look with Fallyn and couldn’t handle it. Elysiah looked tired, her hair haphazardly tied in a headscarf, shadows under her eyes prominent, her face heavily lined. Both her and Lauren’s stomach’s were rounded; Lauren’s was much more pronounced. She was the only one who looked the same, as though they had never left the park.

They walked almost arm in arm to a small white cross next to a large tree. It had been placed there just a few days after her death. They stood in silence. Lauren bent down with some help from the other two and placed a small bouquet at the cross’s base. They did this every year.

“Beautiful.”

She didn’t turn around. Lauren carefully sunk to her knees, rubbing her stomach. She was saying something, her eyes down, lips turned up slightly.

“They care about you.”

Fallyn glanced to her side. A tall man in a black suit leaned against an oak. His eyes were dark like skull sockets, his hair completely gray. His mustache mouth was quirked slightly. Her gaze lingered on his suit before she turned back to the others. All three were kneeling now.

There was a shuffle. She didn’t move as he came closer, his hands in his pockets. He stood next to her, side-by-side, gazing at the scene before them.

“You’re rather odd,” he said after a moment.

Her mouth turned up. “How so?”

“I have met hundreds of ghosts.” Lauren had started crying. Tears dripped down her cheeks, smearing her makeup. The others did not look far behind her. “All of them have different ways they...they met their end. You...you are the first to have been killed by a ghost.”

Fallyn’s smile widened. “I was killed by a ghost?”

“You don’t believe so?”

“Why would I?”

The man was silent. Elysiah had leaned forward and rested her head on the tree above the cross. Her mouth was moving, but Fallyn wasn’t sure any sound was coming out.

“There...was a mention - a statement later retracted by Mrs. Endling - Lauren Ending. She, ah, claimed when you died....you were saying something over and over. A man’s name.”

Fallyn laughed. There was no humor in it. “I was strangled. How could she hear me?”

He shrugged. “Maybe that’s was retracted.” There was more silence. Fallyn wished he would go away. She didn’t have time for him. A humorless smile crossed her face. She had time for everything; she just didn’t care about him. “Rhett Woodward Hewitt...do you remember him?”

She said nothing. Her smile was gone. They had started to stand up, a little wobbly, and Lauren gripped Ashley and Elysiah’s arms. She rightened herself, and they began to make their way back to the car.

“He remembered you.”

“He didn’t kill me.”

“No,” the man agreed, surprising Fallyn. “But he killed your sister.”

Fallyn swallowed. She had thought it would go away, the pain she felt whenever Merle was brought up. It was stronger. She had the suspicion that’s what kept her here: the utter devastation of losing her twin sister. Maybe her father and mother would also remain.

The man shifted back onto the balls of his feet then onto his tiptoes. His left hand moved to his jacket pocket. “And you killed him.”

If she were alive, her skin would have paled and she would have gone cold. Dead, her eyes widened slightly, lips parted, and she stiffened.

The man coughed. “Rhett Woodward Hewitt was found dead in his home at the age of thirty-six. His front door was unlocked and there was nothing taken.” He sounded like he was reading from an article. Fallyn turned to look at him. He smiled, his eyes gleaming. “He was discovered by police after neighbors complained of a smell. It is believed he died on October 25, 2005…” The man tilted his head. “Hewitt had a history of heart problems...coroners believe his cause of death was a heart attack. He is survived by his identical twin brother, Roswell Winthrop Hewitt, who is currently serving time for the murder of Merle Crane.”

Fallyn stared at him. He continued to smile. She swallowed. “Who are you?”

His grin widened. “Carver Egleton...I am a journalist -”

“A journalist who talks to ghosts?”

“We all have hobbies. And...maybe if more journalists spoke to ghosts we would get, ah, answers.” Fallyn pursed her lips. “Mr. Woodward Hewitt killed your sister and then you killed him...and he came back -”

“He didn’t.”

“You want to believe that,” Carver said. “You want to believe it, because that’s what Merle believed, isn’t it? An eye for an eye and then it’s finished. One person takes revenge on another, and the cycle is over, complete.” Fallyn clenched her fists. She was shaking. “But...that’s not how it works. You know it. ‘An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind.’”

“I fell. It was an accident.”

“You made it look like an accident...He returned the favor.”

The shaking intensified. She ran her hands up and down her arms, looking around her. The warm sunlight through the trees felt wrong, like she was being mocked. Fallyn looked back at Carver.

“What do you want?”

He said nothing. She could feel herself getting frantic. Images kept flashing. The cave. Cold and damp. Hanging - choking. Crawling through a small window into a dark basement. Climbing the stairs. Climbing through the cave. A boring man sleeping. Tightening the rope around her waist. A careful shot under his fingernail. Eyes wide, mouth open. Eyes bulging. Deep and dark eyes - then his, blue and vibrant. Gasping, clutching at his chest.

Fallyn stumbled back, her hand clutching her head. She was breathing heavily. Carver stepped towards her.

“You were careful,” he said. His eyes seemed to bore into hers. “You took minute amounts from the hospital over the course of several months. You replayed his testimony, listening for his schedule. You wore gloves and used a needle from your mother - she’s diabetic, correct? One perfect strike under his nail and his heart...it just couldn’t take it.”

“What do you want?” she repeated. Her hand clawed at her chest. She couldn’t breathe.

Carver tilted her head.

“I often wondered…” he began, and Fallyn let out a sob of frustration. She buried her face in her hands and something smacked her on the side of the head. She barely had a chance to look at it - a small black box - before she was gone.

Carver slowly walked over and picked it up. He looked at the box for a moment, then placed it in his pocket. He left, pausing at her cross before making his way across the gravel parking lot and into his car.

He finished his thought aloud, as though she could still hear him, “I often wondered whether or not revenge does end...I guess it doesn’t matter, though. Not when anyone who can do anything is dead.”

2001 13 GHOSTS VS 2018 13 GHOSTS

The Bound Woman: a woman who was tied up upon death (either as a cause or post-mortem) OR a woman who sealed her own fate.

Susan LeGrow was a high school student who liked to play with boy’s emotions. Her games ended up costing her life (as some would put it). Her boyfriend, enraged by her flirting with another, killed the other boy and then strangled her.

Fallyn Crane watched as her sister’s murderer was allowed to walk, and so took justice into her own hands. She died on her birthday in either a spelunking incident gone wrong or the vengeful ghost of her sister’s murderer tying the ropes around her neck.

Both Susan and Fallyn died of strangulation; both sealed their fates. Susan’s story is more of victim blaming - by flirting, she caused her death/provided her boyfriend with a motive - while Fallyn’s is more ambiguous; we are not sure if she actually saw the ghost, it was an accident, or if it was something akin to “Final Destination.”

Gemini: the third story corresponds with gemini, the twins Castor and Pollux. Both Fallyn & Merle Crane, and Rhett Woodward Hewitt & Roswell Winthrop Hewitt were identical twins.

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heister · 7 years ago

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Reykjavik, Rafting, & Golden Circle

well…I didn’t take an early night Sunday. I ended up making some friends at the hostel and we decided to go out; yes there is nightlife in Reykjavik on Sundays. We landed at Kiki, the only queer bar in Reykjavik (which I have affectionately started to call Reyk, even though probably no one says that), where we made some more friends and danced a little. It was pretty low key (there’s not THAT much nightlife on a Sunday!) and I made it back to the hostel in time to stream Game of Thrones. BUT – tragedy – the internet futzed up halfway through and when I tried to get back on, it told me there were too many people using my account. It’s finally happened, friends. I gave out my password too many times. It’s funny because I looked up HBOgo’s policies about number of uses of one login, and they are very vague. So I guess we hit the magic random number. If this happens again, I may have to change the password – I’ll let y’all know if that happens and apologize if that’s the way of it, but a girl’s gotta watch her GOT. I’ll probably just wait until Mondays to watch it anyway, because I’d rather stick it to capitalism and share my (mom’s) account with all my friends but…we’ll see. Oh! And no spoilers here, now or ever.

So I did not have a very good night’s sleep, maybe about 4ish hours, and then it was off to my big rafting adventure! Yes, I went rafting in an arctic river composed entirely of glacier melt. Whoo it was cold! They gave us all special wet suits and shoes which was really helpful. I rented a gopro for the journey and have a butt zillion photos and videos, but the memory chip they gave me doesn’t fit into my computer, so no pics from that for now. It was a lot of fun, but I am so sore now (the next day). It really is a good upper body workout! Oh! And I managed to fall in on the very first rapid. Oy. It was quite exciting…I don’t think I really had time to feel too scared, though I was definitely a little freaked out. But I did everything right and was pulled back into the boat after the rapids were done. I’m sure my butt is bruised but I held on to the boat and kept my feet up, so it could have been a lot scarier than it was. I guess I can say I swam a class 2 rapid! I am grateful to be okay – it was quite the surprise, I was in the boat then all of a sudden I wasn’t! After that it was pretty hard for the rest of the journey to compare, thrills-wise, but believe me, I was glad to have some tranquility. My arm hurt a bit after that, but it went away soon enough. We also stopped at a place where you could jump off a cliff at 5 or 8 m. I chickened out of the 8m and did the 5m one, and ooof, I did not jump right because my body was hurting after that. I think it was the impact of the life jacket moving on my upper torso, it hurt to breathe too deep for the rest of the journey. I was starting to get a little worried, but the pain went away as soon as I took my life jacket off, later. So everything’s okay! But I must say the jump was more scary and painful than fun…I think my phase of jumping off things (see: Central America 2015) may be over; it’s probable that bungee jumping (also CA 2015) actually increased my fear of heights haha.

After rafting, our group did a tour of the Golden Circle. I was so tired and wiped out I almost didn’t even care about everywhere we went. It was hard to pull myself out of the car, I was so tired. But I’m glad I did. We went to Geysir first, which is the geysir all other geysers are named after

It doesn’t gush anymore, just steams. Its neighbor, Strokkur, is much more active, but I didn’t get any good photos. It gushed 3 times in a row right after I walked away – poor timing! Whatever, though, I was there and I remember :)

Then we went to Gullfoss, which means golden waterfall, named for how it looks when the sun hits it a certain way.

It was really beautiful, and we saw a few rainbows! I didn’t have time to go close to the falls, but I was also a little worried about slipping and falling on the slippery rocks, so it’s probably for the better. After my excitement on the rafting trip I think I was a little hypochondriac. On the trail here I realized I didn’t have my drive with the rafting photos and assumed I’d lost it, that it had fallen out of my pocket in a bathroom somewhere. But then I found it back on the bus. Yay!

Our final stop was þingvellir national park, where I’d stopped with the GoT tour earlier. The rest of the group went to the waterfall I’d already seen, but I went to Alþingi (which sounds like how I try to pronounce most Icelandic: “Al-thingy”) which is where the first seat of Icelandic parliament in the 900s (yes, 900s, NOT 1900s) was.

It’s right where the tectonic plates of Europe and North America are coming apart, slowly (about an inch in Iceland every year). I realized that this is what that tunnel from the GoT tour was (the bloody gate one; also used when the wildlings meet the thenns) – it’s the “no man’s land” between continental plates. wild!

Then we went home and I went to sleep, whew!

Today is my last day in Reykjavik and I’m taking it pretty easy. I checked out of my hostel and am at one of my favorite Reyk cafes. Tonight I’m going to the Blue Lagoon – a total tourist trap hot springs but all I’ve heard is that it is a tourist trap AND still worth it. It will be nice to just relax with all my sore muscles from yesterday. After that I’m heading to an airport hostel to rest up before my flight to Berlin early tomorrow morning. I’ll be getting into Berlin around noon tomorrow, and while I’m sad to leave Iceland – I’m rather fond of it – I will NOT miss how freaking expensive it is here! Oy! My hostel in Berlin is 1/3 the price of my hostel here, and it’s so refreshing to return to semi-normal city prices. I’ll be saving a lot in Greece, I hope, but dang, this was an expensive trip. I wouldn’t take it back, but do wish I had planned more. I understand why I didn’t/couldn’t but my recommendation for others is to definitely plan, save, budget, etc. for Iceland. It’s not a great spur-of-the-moment trip, but it is a great trip! I think my favorite parts were the glacier lagoon and rafting. It’s a really beautiful country – even the “mundane” parts of it are gorgeous – and worth coming to see. Just be sure to budget and save in advance. My only regret is that I’ll be saving after the fact to cover some of the costs on this trip. But, yolo, you know?

Well, I think that’s all for now! Catch you in Berlin!

#iceland #reykjavik #gullfoss #geysir #golden circle #rafting #adventure #travel #þingvellir

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whatifwekilledgodandwebothgirls · 6 years ago

Text

Memories

Loki x greek god! Stark! reader

Warnings : cursing , slight angst but it gets better , spelling like a four year old 😂

Summary : Reader has been kidnapped and is now stuck on Asguared. She has a few bonding moments with loki and he tells her the truth about who she is

Part: 2

A/n : Heyyyyy!!!! Sorry i didn't post in a while. (I started watching supernatural) . Loki is being an absolute cuti pie at this one( i think) . I really hope you like it.

You woke up eyes still dry from crying.The room which floor you were lying on was huge! You thought loki would have locked you in a dirty cell with no windows living you starving for days before he gave you some rotten food or something. But this... maybe you didn't mind being a prisoner after all?.The walls were colored a soft shade of purple and a white carpet was right under the king size bed. shelfs full of books and papers were in the wall in front of you next to a wooden desk. Golden curtain were covering a big window . Hesitantly you sat on the bed. It was soft and comfortable . You closed your eyes felling your back aching for last nights sleep on the hard floor and almost fell asleep. You opened your eyes curiously and made your way to the window. You sure as hell were tiered but you had to see were you were before taking a nap.You opened the heavy curtain and gasped.

"holy shit" you told yourself . Panic was taking over you but in the same time you were calm. You felt like a strange , like you were dealing with the unknown but everything was sort of familiar. You've never seen this place in you life but you also felt like you were part of it. In front of you lied Asguared at all its glory. Open air markets were filled with people who were picking all kinds of stuff. They were either women buying vegetables to cook later or fathers checking out dresses for their daughters . Luxurious towers and small house were all over the place. Filling the gap between them were beautiful parks decorated with tons of flowers in breath taking colours. When you saw the Bifrost , the rainbow bridge, you smiled " Gay rights bitches" you thought while laughing. A knock on the door made you turn quickly.

You reminded yourself that you were a prisoner and you couldn't do much if loki came out of that door. "Come in " you said. An old maid opened the door slightly and came inside holding a plate with your breakfast. She seemed afraid of you. "Thank you... " You said when she gave it to you waiting for her to tell you her name "Oh , my name is Tania" she told shyly. "I'm Y/n " you said. She didn't move only sat there staring at her shoes ."Am i scary or something?" You wondered out loud. "No it's just ... You must have done terrible things to be cept up here... Unless of course if you're one of the prince's lovers" she said " Ew , just ew ". You told her " i ain't no one's lover nor a criminal. I'm just a simple prisoner. And i got no idea why am i here" you continued "or what is here anyway"you added .

Tania's heart broke by seing you so lonely and confused so she volunteered to help. She told you everything there was to know about Asguared brought to you books qnd told you stories about the two princes and the royal family.But she never made the nostalgia qnd loneliness go away. You missed Tony and no one could do anything about it .

You were singing a song by imagine dragons while playing with your hair. Someone knocked the door. " Come in Tania" you said . The door opened like it had done a thousand times and somebody walked in like they had a thousand times. Only this time it wasn't Tania. Loki entered the room and your eyes lighted up in anger . You expected him to do something. Something evil. But instead he just stood there in the middle of the room and staired at you." Well it's been a while,love" he managed to say."Yeah a while.It's been three months 'love' . THREE mother fucking MONTHS. Ok?. I've been here for that much not knowing if i was going insane or if i was dreaming or dead or WHATEVER. Tony was been alone all this time! Is he even alive right now have you killed him it doesn't matter! He is going to die with out me you know that! He can't LIVE without me!" You screamed in loud sobbs and tears" I ... I can't live... without him"You cried after you fall at his chest hugging him and crying.That took him by surprise and he seemed pretty unsure about what to do . He warped his arms around you and softly pushed you towards the bed. You sat beside him still hugging him and crying. "I am so ,so sorry love" he wispered to your ear. 'love' that pet name he had used in several occasions. But this time it was different. He wasn't trying to hit on you nor scare you. It made you blush and the tears stopped falling of your face"Better?" The tall god asked. You nodded and pulled away.He gently wiped a tear off your cheek and smiled.

" Loki? Is my brother ok?" You said when you were filling all right . " He's fine don't worry. They won and as less people as possible were hurt. The really did a great job"He replied. " You don't seem so sad about that" you mentioned. He sighed " Another story for another time". " So.. um ... where were you? All this time" you said. " Taking care of some family drama , nothing you should bother about." He told you calmly. Awkward silencen. " Why did you ever came here in the first place?"you asked " i just wanted to see you" he answered. Awwwwwww he wanted to see you. Although he did kill a lot of people and he was evil. But he was a frikking cuti pie."This place is crap by the way" you said in a desperate try to make small talk." This." He told you looking around." Is a royal chamber. Queens have spent their nights here , there is literally nothing better available." "Still there's no wi-fi"You said. "Wait what's wi-fi?" He asked in confusion. A small smile formed at your face. Loki was adorable for a murderer. Well... one thing you really should have learnt about him is that he can read minds. " Aaawww you think i'm adorable?" He said. " What no.. well i mean. no. NO!"You tried to explain witch only made the god giggle like a child. Fuck he was cute. You couldn't be mad at him. You knew you couldn't. But you quickly regretted thinking of that with him present. Thank god he wasn't reading your mind at the moment. " Get the heck out of my room "you said when his laughing became annoying. He obeyed you and left , closing the door.

A girl was running down a corridor. She was out of breath and looked behind her making sure nobody was following her. Suddenly a man appeared in front of her and pulled out a sword.She smirked and right about she was going to attack him someone throwed a knife at her back.You could almost feel the pain when you woke up. Terrified you looked around you to realise that you were still safe at your room in Asguard. You quietly pulled the soft blanket away from you and stood up. You've been having nightmares since you got here and you had reached the point were they're not scary , just annoying.

The thin pice of clothing you were wearing felt cold over you and not at all comfortable.At day one at Asguared Tania had made you were all this fancy long dresses similar to the one you had on you now ." A pretty girl like you shouldn't wear so inappropriate clothes" she had said. It was driving you crazy how this people were stuck at the 13th sentry.Anyway you were feeling kind of home sick and disided to wear your midgaurdian You found your jeans and hoodie putted them on and tried to fall asleep.

"good morning" a smooth voice woke you up.You jumped out of bed ready to complain about how he couldn't just wake you up whenever he wanted to. But you were to tired to argue. You had bearly slept last night and loki noticed." You had another nightmare didn't you?" He asked. You nodded and smiled sadly. " Do you have any idea what those dream are?" He wondered. " Not exactly. There pretty wired." You answered. " You should talk about it you know" he suggested. You rolled your eyes and started discribing your dream. " Well there was this girl. And she died. Got killed actually. I know this isn't supposed to be scary but..." You looked at him only to find out he was listening fearfully with not a sight of boredom in his eyes. " When she got stabbed i could almost feel it too. Like it was really" you continued discribing." Y/n" the god said softly and tenderly touched your hand. You didn't move and observed him in shock. " Y/n i'm sorry i have to do this to you." He said . "Do what ?" You asked.

" You... There's a reason why you always felt left out no earth. There's a reason why i took you hear with me . There's a reason why you have this dreams.You're not human y/n. Or you won't be." He explained.You looked at him like he was crazy.And he probably was. You have spent your entire life on earth.How could you not be human? It was inpossible. You thought about it for a second.Every thing that had happened to you was impossible.You had an iq higher than most people when you were six. You grew up surrounded by robots and computers because of your parents. Then Tony's 'acaident' happened . Could it be true tho?. No it couldn't.

" You're lying. You have to be." You said in a sirious tone. " Let me show you something" He said grabbing your arm and dragging you out side." Nice outfit" he whispered. He finally loosened his grip when you were standing in a small yard . The flowers were smelling better than ever. The birds were singing happily ." This is what you wanted to show me?" You asked. "No this " he answered kneeling over a breath taking purple flower.Its was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen.You soon noticed that it was the only one of its kind at the garden."This is one the most rear flowers in the entire universe. It only growers in one place: Olimbus , the home of midgaurdinan gods. Zeus, their king brought some of them here as a peace offering after a long war."loki said."It's pretty" you told him " Yeah, just like you" he replied making you blush." It's supposed to be the simbol of Artemis , the goddess of hunting..." He added.

He's gaze travelled from the flower to your eyes and he gave you a sad smile." She died many years ago. Right about when you were born..."He place d his hand at yours. "So? What does that mean" You asked" The thing about us gods Y/n is that we don't die. Not truly. We just reborn in some one elses body. We usually have our memories but i guess that your so smart that not even a god can take over your head."he explained. You were at a stage way past paniced.It was all lies. He was a lier it was logical to be lying about all that crap.But again you had to be sure " Loki , please tell me the truth on this one. Do you truly think so? You think i'm some kind of goddess?" You asked. " I don't think so love. I know so." He said.

"So i'm greek apparently... That's cool" you said when you finally relaxed a bit." Go get some sleep, and make sure you'll actually sleep because we've got work to do tomorrow"Loki told you and left.

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saturnsovereign · 7 years ago

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All of the asks!!!

Unusual Asks

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? Spotify

is your room messy or clean? mostly clean

what color are your eyes? brown almost black

do you like your name? why? eh, its weird but pretty uncommon so i don’t usually have to worry about sharing it

what is your relationship status? taken

describe your personality in 3 words or less tired gay dork

what color hair do you have? black

what kind of car do you drive? color? Rav4, dark grey

where do you shop? target

how would you describe your style? i get clothes on and try to at least look decent

favorite social media account tumblr and maybe snapchat

what size bed do you have? twin in dorms, queen at home

any siblings? 2

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? probs back in the bay area, i miss the business there

favorite snapchat filter? i like the flower crown and like those greek ones with like the shiny crowns and stuff

favorite makeup brand(s) none really

how many times a week do you shower? 5 times

favorite tv show? rn its probably Lucifer

shoe size? 7-7.5 depending on brand

how tall are you? 5′2″

sandals or sneakers? sneakers

do you go to the gym? haha no

describe your dream date a date where we don’t have to worry about anything after

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? $240 but i plan on depositing 200 in the bank later

what color socks are you wearing? white

how many pillows do you sleep with? three

do you have a job? what do you do? volunteer guard instructor

how many friends do you have? i can count maybe like on 2 hands

whats the worst thing you have ever done? i hurt my gf

whats your favorite candle scent? i like cucumber melon from when we used to sell candles for a fundraiser in my elementary school

3 favorite boy names Fabian, Santiago, idk

3 favorite girl names Bella 😉, Noelle, idk

favorite actor? the only dude that comes to mind is Drew Seeley and even then he’s not my favorite

favorite actress? Katie McGrath

who is your celebrity crush? Katie McGrath

favorite movie? Beauty and the Beast, Treasure Planet, Lovestruck

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? not really anymore,

money or brains? brains, then you can figure out how to handle money

do you have a nickname? what is it? Feliz Navidad

how many times have you been to the hospital? like once unless you count yearly appointments and stuff

top 10 favorite songs DJ Got Us Fallin in Love, The Nights, Say You Won’t Let Go, etc.

do you take any medications daily? no

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) its a bit on both oily and dry in different places

what is your biggest fear? fear of abandonment

how many kids do you want? maybe 2

whats your go to hair style? half up half down

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) i mean i feel its big after living in an apartment for a while

who is your role model? dont have one tbh

what was the last compliment you received? this morning when my gf snapchatted me the usual ‘good morning beautiful’ snap

what was the last text you sent? “if you want to use additional sources you have to annotate them too 😒”

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? i came from the philippines and they don’t really have a santa there when i was little so there wasn’t really a big reveal, just played along to get presents i guess

what is your dream car? a pick up

opinion on smoking? not for me

do you go to college? yeah

what is your dream job? i wanna be a billionaire from helping people somehow

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? suburbs, i’ve lived and am living in a somewhat rural area and i like being close to them cities

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? haha yeah i’m asian ofc

do you have freckles? no

do you smile for pictures? yeah or else i just look weird

how many pictures do you have on your phone? 3,000+

have you ever peed in the woods? i can’t remember the last time i popped and squated

do you still watch cartoons? yeah

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? McDonalds my dude

Favorite dipping sauce? depends on what i’m eating

what do you wear to bed? a shirt and either a pajama bottom or shorts

have you ever won a spelling bee? no

what are your hobbies? calligraphy, drumming, (knitting)

can you draw? to an extent

do you play an instrument? drums

what was the last concert you saw? none really

tea or coffee? coffee

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? starbucks

do you want to get married? yes

what is your crush’s first and last initial? ahaha BJ

are you going to change your last name when you get married? maybe get it hyphenated

what color looks best on you? dark colors for me and maybe some white thrown in there

do you miss anyone right now? yeah

do you sleep with your door open or closed? closed

do you believe in ghosts? eh, yes and no

what is your biggest pet peeve? idk

last person you called` my brother bc we were trying to figure out where he went in target

favorite ice cream flavor? rocky road

regular oreos or golden oreos? regular

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? rainbow

what shirt are you wearing? class of 2017 shirt

what is your phone background? pic of my two best friends and me during my graduation

are you outgoing or shy? shy

do you like it when people play with your hair? only like one person

do you like your neighbors? i dont know them tbh

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? morning and when i take a shower

have you ever been high? no

have you ever been drunk? nope but im curious

last thing you ate? burrito bowl

favorite lyrics right now none come to mind

summer or winter? winter

day or night? night

dark, milk, or white chocolate? all?

favorite month? don’t have one

what is your zodiac sign capricorn

who was the last person you cried in front of? i was crying in front of my gf bc i saw a video of a cat that was too cute last night.

Other ask bc i didn’t know which one you were referring to but imma do it anyway

1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it? yeah2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now? yeah3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time? a while ago4. Would you ever smile at a stranger? i do it bc i like awkward5. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are? idk6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today? i havent listened to anything today7. What exactly are you wearing right now? sweatshirt, shirt, pants8. How often do you listen to music? sometimes everyday, depends on my mood9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more? jeans10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2013? …yeah?11. Are you a social or an antisocial person? im antisocial12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter ‘A’? no13. What about ‘R’? no14. Can you drive a stick shift? nope15. Do you care if people talk badly about you? a bit 16. Are you going out of town soon? if you mean back home by friday yeah17. When was the last time you cried? see previous ask18. Have you ever told someone you loved them? yes19. If you could change your eye color, would you? idk i feel like any other eye color would just look weird on me20. Is there a boy who you would do absolutely everything for? no21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having. i have to keep writing my papers22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead? when my girl does it yeah23. Are you dating the last person you talked to? no24. What are you sitting on right now? my bed25. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you? yeah26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have? yeah27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night? my gf28. Do you get a lot of colds? i get the occasional cold29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from? last year?30. Does anyone hate you? idk maybe31. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room? no32. Do you like watching scary movies? no33. Do you want your tongue pierced? no34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be? idk they’ve been pretty important to my character so35. Did you have a dream last night? i dont remember it but yeah i think so36. When was the last time you told someone you loved them? a few hours ago, i texted my gf37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years? idk, we’d still be in college38. Do you think someone has feelings for you? i mean i hope she does39. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? idk40. Did you have a good day yesterday? …eh41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship? yeah42. In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a girl? yeah43. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you? yeah44. What’s the best part about school? friends and some sense of purpose45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook? yes46. Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school? haha yeah47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head? oh boy do i48. Were you single over the last summer? no49. Is your life anything like it was two years ago? no, its changed drastically tbh50. What are you supposed to be doing right now? sleeping51. Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with? no52. Are you nice to everyone? most of time i hope53. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to? ha yeah54. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat? well yeah55. Are you good at hiding your feelings? …56. Do you think you like someone? i mean yeah my gf57. Have you kissed someone whose name starts with a ‘J’? oh haha yeah58. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys? girls59. Has anyone of your friends ever seen you cry? yeah over a movie60. Do you hate anyone? myself61. How’s your heart? its beating62. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about? what happened last year before school started63. Have you ever cried over a guy? yeah64. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now? idk65. Are your toenails painted pink? nope66. Will your next kiss be a mistake? i don’t think so?67. Girls love it when boyfriends cry; correct? what?68. Have your pants ever fallen down in public? they weren’t pants but it was a kilt69. Who was the last person you were on the phone with? see above?70. How do you look right now? tired71. Do you have someone you can be your complete self around? yeah72. Can you commit to one person? yeah73. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to? no74. Have you ever felt replaced? oh yeah75. Did you wake up cranky? haha maybe bc i didn’t wanna get out of bed and face the world76. Are you a jealous person? :/77. Are relationships ever worth it? you gotta make them worth it78. Anyone you’re giving up on? i don’t think so?79. Currently wanting to see anyone? i can see people outside my window80. Name something you have to do tomorrow? college81. Last person you cried in front of? see above82. Is there someone you will never forget? my gf83. Do you think the person you have feelings for is protective of you? i think so?84. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now? cuddling85. Are you over your past? never have been probably never will86. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex? well yeah87. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to? oh boy lord you wouldn’t want that88. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept? define first true love? if its my gf i’d accept her empty handed89. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in? yeah90. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated? uh they eventually disliked her after i stopped liking her91. Will you be in a relationship in 2 months? hopefully92. Is there anyone you know with the name Michael? thats weird cuz no XD93. Have you ever kissed a Matthew? nope94. Were you in a relationship in January? How was it going? yeah, it was going95. Were you happy with the person you liked in March? yeah96. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive? the last person i texted other than my group chat is my gf and yeah i definitely find her attractive97. Who do you have texts from? my friends and family?98. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say? cool99. Have you ever kissed someone older than you? thats weird… no XD100. Who’s in your profile picture with you? tigger101. Ever kissed under fireworks? no actually102. Has anybody ever given you butterflies? yeah

#Anonymous #ask #anon #personal #message

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alb-ni-m-fia · 8 years ago

Text

Why am I so nice?

Growing up, you're told about how you should treat others the way you wanted to be treated. The golden rule. And you take it to heart because you certainly don't want to be treated bad. So you become the rainbow to other people's storms. You do the best you can to be the person that will show respect and kindness towards others and be the general "best friend".

That makes you easy to step on

A little background: all throughout middle school and high school, I’ve been in and out of relationships. Girlfriend would always break up with me. I would be down and in the dumps for abouuut a week (tops) and then I would be over it.

Senior year. Met a girl at a summer Christian camp that I worked at. We hit it off pretty well. Dated for at least a year and a half. It was a good relationship. We genuinely had fun together and I saw myself spending my life with this woman. Was I thinking about this at too young of an age? Was I being naive? Who can even tell? Everything was going well. At least I thought it was. And then college started.

We go to our own separate campuses and try to see each other when we can. Normal long-distance stuff. She begins to go to parties. I showcase my worry, but she tells me that she’s being careful. Ok. I trust her. Everything’s fine.

Everything was not fine.

Long story short, it started out small and got worse and worse until the point where she cheated on me by having sexual relations with another man.

Shot to the gut.

BUT I STAYED WITH HER

Here’s the thing. You teach yourself the “golden rule” and its ingrained in your head. Everything was laid out for me to leave. There was my opportunity. And I didn’t take it. Because I believed in US. Like “we can get through this.” kinda stuff. And we try. For a few weeks I tried to forgive her and move on from the fact that there was a moment where she wasn’t thinking about me while a man asked her if it was alright to insert himself into her.

I couldn’t do it. I ended our relationship. I just couldn’t handle it. It was like a burn on your forearm that just wouldn’t heal. It took me -years- to get over her. And to be completely honest, I don’t know if I’ve 100% forgiven her.

From that day on, I gave myself a zero tolerance for cheating. So much as kiss another person, you’re gone.

But that’s not the end of the story. That’s not why I’m writing this.

I’m about to go into grad school. I reconnect with a friend from back home and we hit off. Yada, yada. You know how it goes.

She is about to begin her undergrad. We do long-distance. She begins to go to parties.

Do you see the pattern?

I express my concern. I tell her about my previous relationship and how I am afraid for what may become of us if she were to continue going to parties. Here’s the problem: She’s part of a sorority. So she can’t just stop going to them. They’re an obligation. And she joined with the intention of looking for friends (genuine friends. It was that fear of going-to-college-and-not-having-any-friends kind of thing).

Fine. I can cope. Its just parties. She can be careful. I need to trust her. I do trust her. I can’t be mad at her for this. I need to support her. This is her decision. She is a rational adult. Its fine. Its fine. Its fine.

“I drank too much last night.”

Ok well that’s kind of scary. I mean something could of happened. You never know who can be at these parties and you don’t know what other people’s intentions are and...

PARANOIA

Every time I got a text at 2 or 3 in the morning, I prayed to God that she would be alright. I constantly anticipated the time where things went too far. But they didn’t come. She was always looked after by friends. She was safe. There were a few times where boys were being inexcusable bags of shits and tried to get with her. Herself, as well as her friends, would shrug them off, saying how she was already taken and all that jazz. It was...refreshing to see this. I din’t know if this happened with the previous relationship, so this reassurance was a sigh of relief.

Then things get rocky. Not because of the parties (it was always rocky for me on the inside when it came to parties), but because some differences between us were starting to become a glaring problem that they needed to be addressed. We didn’t really know how to resolve these issues, so our relationship kind of became a stranded boat in the middle of the ocean. During this rocky period, girlfriend is becoming unsure if our relationship will last. And yea I guess we have our differences...

BUT I STAY WITH HER

I want things to work out. At this point, I’m having thoughts of marriage. And when it comes to issues, we’ve talked our way through things and we made things work. I wanted to apply that logic to this. Just like I always have. Just talk. Don’t speak out of emotion. Think rationally. You can do this.

“A lot of guys flirt with me, and sometimes I flirt back.”

No. No no no no. Do not start with this.

I express immediate dislike. Stop this at once. You cannot be doing this to me. We are suppose to be a team here. I get it. You’re confused. You’re unsure of our future. I’ll give you that. That’s why we need to work together. We need to figure this out like we always have. Ok? You were at a party? Ok, so I’m assuming intoxication, correct? Ok. Thought so. So alcohol played a factor in this. Ok. Alcohol does some messed up things inside people, so its possible that your actions are just the alcohol talking. Ok. I’ll give you that.

“I kissed a girl.”

Alcohol...is bad. Please. I’m really worried about this. This is getting worse. Why are you continuing down this road. You call right before my class starts to tell me this?

This was the first time I ever became upset at my significant other. With any of my significant others.

She profusely apologizes. Promise that it won’t happen again. Hey, remember my new rule? About zero tolerance for cheating? In my book, I’m pretty sure this falls into that category. So congratulations. You’ve given me a reason to break up with you on a giant silver platter. Look at it. It would be so easy to just say it. Say it and it’ll be over.

BUT I STAY WITH HER

At this point, I’m questioning myself. I’ve set this new rule for me, and I broke it. I broke my own rule. WHY. WHYWHYWHYWHYWHY? WHY do I do this to myself. Why do I continuously try to hold on to a relationship that is falling apart at the seems? Why does this happen to the good guy? Oh look. Party. Again, huh? Its always the fucking parties. I hate them. So...you were drunk and kissed a girl. You know what? Alcohol caught you again and played you for a puppet and you weren’t really doing it because you wanted to so I can understand.

4 hours ago. Today. 5/12/17 Writing this part at aprox. 2 AM.

“I made out. With the same girl a few nights ago.”

“I was there and she was invited and it just kind of happened.”

“I am so sorry. I’m such a shitty person.”

“Please forgive me”

You ever get that feeling when someone you thought cared about you suddenly does a 180 degrees? But also in a way, they are beginning to burn the bridge that closes the gap between you? This is happening to me right now. My fears are coming true. It is getting worse. I feel like this is spiraling out of control. I have no way of stopping this. It has been a constant upward battle of keeping faith in us as a pair and in keeping trust in her from doing things she knows she isn’t suppose to do.

At this point. She has gone above and beyond to give me a reason to break up with her. And you know what? I contemplated just that. You’re right. You have been treating me as something on the back burner. I feel like while you are confused as to how our relationship stands, you go out and do what you set your mind to and live life the way you want to live it and really not consider me in the picture. Because why not? I might not be in the picture soon anyway! So who gives a flying fuck? You might as well consider us broken up!

And yet...Something in me stops me from saying those sharp 5 words. A reason. A reason to stay together. A light at the end of the tunnel. The sun after a thunderstorm.

And I don’t know what it is. The things that’s holding me back is the thing that isn’t making its identity known.

CONFLICT. TORN.

WHY DON’T WE JUST KILL THIS ALREADY. SHE’S BASICALLY ASKING FOR IT AT THIS POINT

She’s a broken person. She needs to be given a chance to redeem herself.

YOU GAVE HER TOO MANY OF THOSE ALREADY. THIS IS JUST GOING TO GET WORSE.

Yea I’m afraid of that, but do you hear her voice? She’s trembling. She’s genuinely sorry for what she’s done. She wants to be forgiven.

YOU’RE TOO SOFT.

But don’t you agree?

I’M TRYING TO PROTECT YOU. LOOK AT WHAT’S HAPPENED BEFORE. THIS EXACT SAME SHIT HAPPENED YEARS AGO AND YOU STILL AREN’T 100%.

I’m trying, Ok?

I’M SICK AND TIRED OF PEOPLE STEPPING ALL OVER US BECAUSE YOU GIVE THEM TOO MUCH RESPECT. TOO MUCH COMFORT. TOO MUCH LOVE. TOO. MANY. CHANCES.

If I behave like that then we won’t have anybody now will we?!?

I’M JUST SICK OF IT!

You know what? Maybe I can’t say it. Maybe I can’t tell myself to say something that will end a relationship with her. I love her.

WHY THE HELL NOT? ITS EASY.

You know damn well that it isn’t easy.

LOOK. YOU’VE BEEN STEPPED ON BY SO MANY WOMEN IN YOUR LIFE AND YOU JUST LET IT SLIDE. WHY?

I’m just nice to them. I do everything I think is right. We’re a decent guy! So I don’t know. I don’t know and I ask myself that every day.

CAUSE YOU’RE SO GODDAMN NICE.

People like that about me.

RIIIGHT. AND YOU ALWAYS GIVE THEM YOUR EAR OR A HELPING HAND. THAT’S GREAT AND ALL. REAL PROUD OF YOU. BUT LOOK WHERE THAT GOT YOU.

I need to make a decision. I need to determine whether I’m going to destroy this or try to salvage it.

OH FOR THE LOVE OF...ITS SIMPLE!

Its not.

JUST SAY IT!

No.

WHY NOT?

Because. We can still make this work. I know we can

BULLSHIT.

We’ve done it before. We can get through this.

DON’T GIVE ME THAT CLICHE BULLSHIT. YOU KNOW THIS IS JUST GOING TO GET WORSE.

No it won’t.

WATCH. YOU’RE GONNA CHOOSE TO STAY TOGETHER AND THEN YOU WILL GET SHIT ON. BECAUSE ITS HAPPENED BEFORE. AND IT WILL HAPPEN AGAIN.

Stop it.

DON’T BELIEVE ME? TRY ME.

I won’t let you win.

YOU CAN’T FORCE ME AWAY.

Go away. I hate you. I hate this side of us.

GIVE IN.

No.

GIVE IIIIIIN.

Mm,

GIVE. IN.

“I think we need to stop.”

I said it. Those words came out of my mouth. And in this FaceTime call, I saw her face. And the color began to flush from her face.

Its frozen now....reconnecting...

Call dropped.

Nothing but the black screen of my iPad and the reflection of my face. Did she hear me? What is thinking now?

DOESN’T IT FEEL GOOD?

I feel terrible. I feel like I’ve committed a crime.

ITS OVER NOW.

No. I don’t want it to be over

GET USE TO IT.

What if she calls back?

SHE WO-

*Incoming Facetime*

The moment I saw her face, I took it all back. I profusely stated that I didn’t want that to happen. I didn’t want us to break up. I wanted us to be a pair. I wanted us to be partners. I wanted us to work this out. I didn’t want to lose her. I can’t lose her. I just can’t. She’s wasn’t confident in us before but she is going to try to be now, despite our differences. And I will do so likewise. With all my might> I will do the best that I can to improve and I will do whatever it takes. I love her.

So yes. I stayed with her. We are still together. We will work things out.

I don’t know why I’m doing this.

YOU DISAPPOINT ME.

Things will change. Just watch. We can get through this.

WHAT’S THE REASON YOU’RE STILL WITH HER? IT CAN’T BE ANYTHING MATERIAL AT THIS POINT.

I love her.

RIGHT. YOU “LOVE” PORN TOO. WANNA MARRY THAT?

...

YOU HAVEN’T BEEN GETTING MUCH LOVE FROM HER NOW. YOU’VE RESORTED BACK TO YOUR GOOD OL’ HABITS. SUCKS DOESN’T IT? BUT JUST THINK OF THAT IMMEDIATE GRATIFICATION. HEY! THAT GIRL IN YOUR 8 AM LECTURE. THE ONE WHO SITS IN THE THIRD ROW. SHE’S PRETTY CUTE ISN’T SHE? SHE SEEMS TO BE INTO YOU.

...That’s you talking. Nothing will ever come from that. Because we are with her.

IS THERE SOMETHING ABOUT HER? WHY? WHY STAY WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS TRAMPLED YOU OVER AND OVER AGAIN?

I already told you

...

YOU KNOW I ALREADY KNOW THE REASON. I’M JUST TRYING TO GET YOU TO SAY IT.

...

...I don’t want to be alone.

THEEERE YOU GO.

#personal #me #long post #hey so this is going real deep into my personal business #I just need to get this off of my chest while its still fresh #it might be depressing to some of you so read at your own risk #also my inner writer came out halfway into this #i like writing #im not looking for critique #just #getting it out of the way

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