#i said i need 2 eat some DINNER. and went to asda

[tearfest]

made a very adult decision and spent my last £4.62 on 4 cinnamon buns and 6 iced fingers .. as u can tell i currently have a sweet tooth !!

[jessiewre]

Day 16

Mon 20th Jan 2020 (thats the date 20.01.20 weird init)

Woke up at 6am to hear a mosquito buzzing around my ear and flipped the light on like a ninja. The little punk was squished within 5 mins.

Now that’s the kind of adventures I’m after. Not a LIVE volcano.

Breakfast wasn’t quite ready as we were early, so we wolfed down some bananas and weird tasting coffee that was accidentally mixed with African milky tea and we found bodas to the Grande Barrie (Rwanda/Congo border). That was after was tried to ACCIDENTALLY leave the hotel without paying for one of the nights.

The border building was modern with ok toilets (but of course I dropped the WHOLE toilet roll on the wet floor fml)) and we headed to the tourist office who helped fast track us through. We were sat there looking at each other like WHAT ARE WE DOING. Going into the Democratic Republic of CONGO, climbing an active volcano and sleeping on the crater edge and paying for the experience? THIS IS CRAZY. But I suppose that’s the fun of it?

AM I RIGHT OR AM I RIGHT??

A safari type vehicle was waiting for us and we were driven through Goma to the start of the trek, stopping off the wash our hands at an Ebola check point. The seats were raised so it felt like we were sort of paraded through the town - the locals enjoyed the spectacle.

We pulled into the trek start point (I can confirm that the toilet there is not one I recommend really having to try and aim while you pee) and still saw no signs of other muzungus who might be joining us. We really hoped for a decent group but its such a roulette. Could be some right bores in there you never know.

A vehicle pulled up and a French brother and sister - Fleur & Simon - got out, with Fleur’s Belgium husband Toma & Argentinian Martin. Fleur worked for Unicef and Toma was a photographer and they met in Haiti but currently lived in Congo’s capital Kishasa (!). Simon was visiting her from Paris and worked in a bookshop and ran his own magazine. Martin worked in Nairobi for the Argentinian embassy.

Basically we had a great group, really interesting, good fun and chilled out at the same time. PHEW.

The trek was pretty hard but we had a lot of stops and the guides were so good, constantly reiterating that there was no rush and we could stop whenever we wanted for as long as we wanted.

Which was great for ME in particular...

See, when we sat down for lunch at our 3rd stop, I was fine but I was also STARVING. So I wolfed down my sandwich and fruit juice with more enthusiasm than a kid at a Pizza Hut buffet.

Then the section to climb straight after lunch was SO steep, such hard work, that I suddenly felt kinda sick. I had to take a few mini breaks and Phil poured water on my face rather dramatically, then I yawned a few times and in his panic mode he was like WHY ARE YOU YAWNING SO MUCH and I was like Cos I want to yawn mate. The chef Jean-Louie was so nice, reassuring us that there was no stress and we could take breaks as much as we needed. Ok sure by ‘we’ I mean ‘I’.

I managed to make it to the next proper break point ok but was craaaaving one of our juices. Then I was fiiiiine, I immediately felt better with 5 minutes rest and one of the bargain basement 10% juices they’d provided. Panic over (right Phil?).

One of the guides pointed to the top of the mountain and you could faintly see some shapes along the edge, which were apparently the huts we’d be sleeping in. Honestly they were SO FAR AWAY. I could not compute that we would be able to climb there in just a few hours. It seemed like a ridiculous idea.

But before we knew it, the cabins were in sight and we did the final 30 minutes of climbing watching them get closer and closer.

We finally reached the crater edge and apprehensively went towards it to look over...

I mean, it was absolutely BONKERS. A GIANT crater expanse lay before us, with a glowing lava lake bubbling away to the left and a whole other mini volcano on the right properly going off.

Never seen anything like it.

And hope it don’t ever again.

LOL joking (not joking) but seriously it was insane. So incredible and mesmerising.

We all sat and looked at it for a while, and then Phil remembered - he’d got himself a special little tshirt made hadn’t he.

After becoming obsessed with the idea that we needed to ‘drink an umbongo in the Congo’ he’d tried to find one in loads of supermarkets before we left. At one point he even went out at midnight to visit a 24 hour Asda ffs. With no luck, he’d managed to get a T-shirt made on the DAY that we left the UK - just in time. So wearing his UmBongo T-shirt, we did a little video to share with his triumph of been there, wore the T-shirt.

While we all sat looking at the volcano, I thought I’d I ask the security guard Jonas who was sat with us the question on everybody’s lips:

‘Jonas, can I ask, what time will dinner be?’

I’d assumed that he would know the answer but Jonas then went to ask the chef.

Phil was like ‘Oh Jess that’s so embarrassing, you should not have asked that’ but then everyone piped up like We are SO glad you asked that, we’re starving too.

So HA to Phil, they were buzzin - then Jonas said 6:30pm, which was 2 hours away.

No one was buzzin then.

But suddenly the chef pops out of his kitchen and says, word for word:

‘Jessica’...(yes he said my name only)...’would you like some coffee or tea?’

I looked around at the group, who were all wondering where their invite was, then back at the chef and said

‘Yes...yes I would. Thank you’

Clearly my tactic of pretending to feel ill earlier was REALLY paying off.

Obviously once I was in the kitchen with my milky sugary coffee, I asked if there was enough for the others and thankfully there was or I could have been swiftly isolated by my fellow trekkers, no one needs that when there’s a lava lake nearby - and then everyone had a hot drink in my warm kitchen (yes Mine). 
We started talking about food and I asked about people’s favourite cuisine . Weirdly the two French people said they didn’t like cheese, so I was like ‘I love cheese!’ Cos I’m a normal person. Then the chef turned his head and said:

‘Jessica, would you like some cheese? I have some cheese’

LOLLLLLL

I said ‘Jean Louie, that would be lovely thank you’ and he cut me a massive slice of cheese which OF COURSE I shared with everyone (only after I felt all their eyes on me like daggers, but actually 2 people obviously didn’t want any cos they don’t like cheese, which was an absolute result).

Jean-Louie’s kitchen was a basic arrangement of a simple coal fire and a big wooden box of stuff. He managed to prepare a carrot soup to start, plus rice, vegetation’s and chicken for 7 people. We had requested the Vegetarian food, but this message had not been passed on so there was a piece of chicken for both Phil and I.

Look, I’m really trying not to eat meat, and I’m actually doing very well and hardly ever eat it. But when you’ve trekked up a volcano and you’re starving and someone says ‘No there’s definitely enough, please eat this delicious tasty chicken I’ve cooked especially for you’, well, it would have been rude not to wouldn’t it. And also, I really wanted to eat it.

It was so nice all of us squeezed into this little kitchen cabin, cheers-ing with our carrot soups in mugs, eating as all the light disappeared and you could no longer see what was on your plate. If you’ve even done anything like that, trekking in mountains, camping - you’ll know the vibe I’m talking about. Super snug and satisfying. Was great.

Headed back out to check out the volcano and yep, it was still there. So we all looked at it a bit more while the lava bubbled and cracked and the light show continued.

Despite the hot lava (did I mention there was a lava lake??) it was pretty cold so I called it a day and went back to climb into the warm fleece lining and lovely sleeping bag. Phil didn’t head to bed for another hour as was utterly fascinated by the volcano, which of course I do understand, but I was a bit like Well its not going anywhere and I have like starred at it for 2 hours now and my legs are cold so...ya know.

And just before bed, I thought of the BEST idea ever - wait for this. So, the actual toilet option was a 5 minute walk DOWN the volcano then obviously UP again to return. Nah bruv.

I found an empty water bottle and sent Phil to Jean-Louis to get the bottle cut about 15 cm from the top. And thus I had created the perfect camping toilet. Genius, absolute game changer.

*Also - found out the Fleur has so far contracted Malaria no less than SEVEN TIMES. Wow. But she’d totally fine even after that, good to know I thought!

[kyakykreativitylover]

McGrawHamilton Uni AU

(Part 1.5 AKA The interlude)

James wakes up to the opening strains from “He’s a pirate.” He groggily lifts his head from the pillow and answers the phone. 

“Hi dad.” He croaks into the phone. “How was your first day at uni.” His father asks jovially. (He feels bad. He only called once yesterday to let him know that he had gotten to Manchester but hadn’t said anything since). “I’m sorry da-”

His father interupts him quickly. “Listen lad, I remember my first few days of independence. My mum heard nought from me for three weeks.” Hal then laughs. James smiles at that, he then rubs the nape of his before talking. “Yeah, the first day was okay. My flat mates are alright and the halls are in a great location. I’m like 3 minutes from Lidl.” Hal hums. “Anything else?” James starts. (”How the fuck did he read me, I didn’t say shit. What in the hell”). “Uh, yeah. We’re having this guy over for tea tonight and I don’t know what to think.” Hal hummed again. “I mean he’s really attractive, but I also don’t know what to think of him or what he thinks of me. Is he even attracted to me??.” James shifts in his bed as he thinks about Thomas and everything that happened last night (which was nothing). “Can I offer some advice?” Hal asks gently. James nods and then realises his dad can’t see him. “I’ll take the silence as a yes.” His dad says. James outright laughs at that. “Enjoy yourself James.” James stops laughing. “I know how hard it was for you growing up here. There are exactly three openly gay and bisexual boys in this village and I know you wouldn’t touch any of them with a 50 foot pole, and that says nothing about all the teasing that went your way. All the jokes and ridicule at your expense.” James purses his lips and then opens his mouth to speak, but before he can get a word out Hal interupts. “I mean it James Flint McGraw. Enjoy yourself. Live, laugh, get too drunk and stumble home at 8 in the morning.” James starts laughing again. “Just enjoy yourself.” James smiles softly. “I will dad.”

“Now go socialise before your flatmates start thinking you’re an antisocial ass.” James smirks. “You should also go and make sure Billy is fed before he decides to eat you.” He sasses back. “Your brother would rather die than eat me.” Hal quips back. “TOO MUCH FAT.” James and Hal say in unison laughing. “Speak of the devil.” Hal says. “Hold on a sec James, Billy is going to talk to you.” There is quiet for a beat.

“Hi James.” Billy says. “It’s Billy.”

“Who the fuck is Billy?!” James says in a deadpan voice.

“Fuck you Jamie.”

“I thought we were never to speak of that again.” James hisses down the line.

“We don’t know each other, so how did we make that agreement?” Billy says in a solemn voice.

“Fuck you Billy.”

“Now, now boys.” Hal says somewhere in the background.

“Anyway, good luck at uni bro. I hope you don’t fail too badly.”

“Thanks Billy, good luck with high school.”

James rubs his face after the call and thinks about how tired he still is. He blacks out again. 

Part 2. (The continuation of the main plot?? Who am I lying to, there’s no plot. Think of this as a slice of life anime- it’s all about characters and the stuff that happens to them).

He wakes up to the smell of oatmeal,eggs and bacon frying and strong coffee. He leaves his room and goes next door into the common room.

Madi is sitting on the couch eating oatmeal. Max is holding a copper and glass cafetiere and pouring the rest of the coffee into a white mug. Miranda is plating up the eggs and bacon and Vane is eating an apple. (”Wow, how domestic, I didn’t anticipate this either, I thought it was every person for themselves, but I guess I was wrong.”) Vane sees him, grins and chucks the apple core at his head. “Fuck you Vane.” He picks the core up and tries to thrown it into the bin. “Boys.” Miranda says sternly before actually putting the core into the bin. Vane laughs. “I’m heading out for a smoke. Anyone coming with?” Max gets up. “I’m game.” She says with a smile on her face. “Can you make me more coffee when we get back?” She asks Vane. Vane nods as he grabs a coat and his keys.

James watches them leave. “I missed something.” He tells Madi and Miranda. “Yup.” Madi says. “Charles Vane bought coffee grounds and a cafetiere, Max did not.” Madi tells him before going into the kitchenette and putting her bowl in the sink. Miranda gets her toast out of the toaster and digs into her eggs and bacon. “I was starving.” She says to James who was staring at her demolishing half the plate. “No please you don’t have to explain yourself.” James says quickly. “I’m just trying to think where I’ll get food, I haven’t done any shopping.” Madi looks at him for a second. She then goes to a cupboard and removes an oatmeal cup. “Here, help yourself.” She says casually. (”Great I’m already magically the charity case person. Shit!” James thinks as he takes the offered oatmeal.) “James.” James turn to look at Miranda. “We’ll go shopping in like an hour when the shops open. You’ll buy your stuff then.” Madi smiles at him. “We’re flat mates. We’ll probably help each other a lot over the course of the year.” She says, “So don’t feel bad for needing help right now.” (“How are they reading my mind right now?!?!?!?”) She then chuckles “Also, it’ OATMEAL, not a gold bar. Stop being awkward.” He huffs a small laugh before putting the oatmeal cup with water into the microwave.

Max and Charles return. Charles boils the kettle and grabs the cafetiere and cleans it out. Max smiles at them. “We really need to shopping.” She says. “I need to get actual food.” Madi and James make eye contact and Miranda says, “Lidl, Asda and Tesco all open at 10.30 on Sunday, which is in an hour. We’ll all go then.” Miranda then gets up. “Excuse me I need to do a bit more unpacking.” She goes into her cupboard and removes a tray of eggs. “Help yourselves. Unfortunately, I ate all the bacon though.” She then smiles at all of them before leaving. The kettle finishes boiling with a click. “I’ll finish that.” Max tells Charles who had begun to spoon grounds into the cafetiere. Charles leaves her to make her coffee and goes into a cupboard where he removes a loaf of bread. “Anybody want toast with their eggs?” James looks up at Charles before speaking. “Yeah.” He says softly. “I can make everyone their eggs if they want.”  “Dude,relax okay.” Charles tells him. “You don’t need to be this awkward.” Madi huffs out a laugh. “I already told him that.” Max looks at him for a bit. “I like my eggs over easy.” James smiles at her gratefully. Max then turns to Charles. “He’s offering to cook eggs once, not to clean your room and do the laundry, YOU relax.” Charles raises his hands. “Fair dos.” Charles then says to James. “Sunny side up.” James grabs a pan and begins to cook. “Madi?” He asks her. “No, I’m allergic to eggs.” She then goes for the loaf of bread. “But I’m having some of the bread.” 

----------------

Later in the afternoon after they get back from doing a TON of shopping and have arranged who’ll have which cupboard and which fridge shelf, Jack returns with his girlfriend. “Anne meet everyone. Everyone meet Anne.” “Hi Anne.” Max says with what was fast become her trademark charming smile. Anne then ‘bro-hugs’ Charles. “Hi.” She says to the room. “Oh yeah, Jack, your the second shelf in the first fridge and your cupboard is under the breakfast bar.” Charles informs him. “Cool.” Jack says. “I’ll go shopping in a bit.” He says. “Also Anne’s staying in the night.” Charles just smiles. “Great, she can join us for dinner. My friend Thomas is coming over.” Miranda says. Anne, Jack and Charles all look at each other. “Cool.” Charles says for all of them. “Is it gonna be a party?” Charles asks. “I hope not, I have my course meeting tomorrow morning at 9.” Miranda responds. “Oh come on, we’re freshers.” Charles pouts. “Drink yes, get totally smashed, no.” Miranda says. “What ever mom.” Charles tells her. Miranda just shakes her head. “I’m cool with a chill evening.” James says. (”That’s right, I meet my supervisor tomorrow at 10. Better to be sober and well rested, I don’t want them to hate me before I’ve even begun the year.”) “Fine.” Charles says. “Also you two can go.” He tells Jack and Anne. They then both go to Jacks room. Vane rolls his eyes. “Love birds.” He tells every one. “They’ve been together since the first year of high school.”

“Cute.” Max says.

-----------------

Miranda gets a text and raises an eyebrow. “Thomas’ll be here in an hour.”

“Okay.” James says sinking further into the couch.They (James, Max, Madi, Charles, Miranda, Jack and Anne) are all watching a marathon of “The Chase.”

There’s a beat of silence. Madi finally gets up and turns off the TV. “What the fuck?!?!” James and Vane say.

“Our common room looks like a ring of Hell.” 

Sure enough, there’s liquor bottles and stains every where, a pile of take away boxes and a mountain of washing up that looked like Everest. Also somehow there are clothes on the floor.

“Fine.” Vane said. 

He grabs bin liner and begins to stuff take away cartons into the bag. Vane then separates out the trash to recyclables and non recyclables. Flint looks at the overflowing garbage bin and decides to take the already existing garbage out. Max beats him to it, though. He then decides to tackle the washing up. Miranda has already plugged the hoover into the wall and has begun to hoover. Madi starts to organise the common room.  Jack goes to help with the washing up and Anne starts wiping surfaces. Max returns and puts the washing up away as soon as it’s done. Miranda then mops the floor. In half an hour their common room is spotless. They’re also filthy.

They all retreat to their respective bedrooms to have showers and get dressed for the dinner.

A/N: Here’s parts 1.5 and 2. Next up, the dinner with Thomas. Also for those who might be wondering. Most student accommodation in the UK is called “Halls” and they are mostly self catered (i.e. you need to cook for yourself) and you don’t really have a roommate, you have flat mates. Also,again this is based on my experiences in Uni. Not all flats have a great synergy, but some do. I decided that the characters would be good friends and support each other even though they are practically strangers. (The breakfast thing happened to me in my third halls, I just got offered a cereal bar and some eggs on toast with baked beans from two different people so yeah, that happened).