#i remembered the song about the fried steamed chicken that went for a walk

[simplesaladsubblog]

Giant elf and her homunculus twink

Hc that Klee will outgrow Alice a little (and the chalk brothers even more so, she can already carry them both in her arms, and fakebedo still won't be served without a passport)

[shhh-no-ones-home]

solidarity izzy stradlin x chef!reader

+++++++++ Base on the tags in @slashscowboyboots post about Izzy being v skinny. He needs to be fattened up lol. So here is him spending quality time with his new s/o that cooks all the time and tries weird new recipes. this is so fluffy and cute omg. enjoy!

Song: consider me by allen stone

tag list: @cynic-spirit @satans-arse @slashscowboyboots +++++++++

I shook the frying pan in front of me over the open flame of the stove. When I heard the front door click open I smiled to myself.

"Y/n?"

I heard Izzy call out.

"I'm in the kitchen!"

I said, turning the frying chicken in front of me.

"That smells great, what is it?"

He asked, drawing my attention quickly as he walked in behind me. I smiled at him as I stirred the pot next to me.

"I'm making a spin on chicken Parmesan. I remember you saying you liked it but I wanted to change a few things."

He hummed in curiosity, wrapping his arms loosely around my waist and watching intently.

"It looks good that's for sure."

He kissed my cheek before letting me go and walking to the fridge for a drink. When the timer went off I grabbed my potholder and drained the pasta water. I had made futtuccine as a sort of middle ground, but Izzy didn't really mind. He knew how much I hated spaghetti. I dumped the pot of pasta into the baking dish sitting on the island, Izzy sitting back in his bar stool as the steam rose.

"That's very warm."

He noted, making me laugh.

"Well yeah I'd hope so iz, I just finished cooking it."

I shook my head as he cracked a smile, watching me as I put the pot back on the stove.

"Hey will you cut up some of that parsley?"

I asked turning around and both of us freezing. He was holding up a noodle above his mouth but it hadn't quite touched his tongue get. I placed my hands on my hips and sent him a playful glare. He stared at me as he finished putting the noodle in his mouth, the heat rising to his face now being visible in a light shade of pink across his features.

"Parsley you said?"

He asked a bit bashful and I laughed, nodding.

"Yeah."

I said turning back around and picking the pot of sauce up. I set it on a pot holder beside the baking dish full of pasta and began ladling it on top. Izzy watched me intently as I covered all the noodles.

"Did you make that from scratch?"

He asked noting the few ingredients still strewn across my counter tops. I sent him a knowing smile before handing him a spoon, finishing what I was doing and scooting the pot of extra sauce towards him.

"Yes I did, try it!"

I encouraged, getting the glass plate of now fried chicken from beside the stove. I glanced at him quickly as I placed the pieces on top of the sauce, waiting for his response.

"Oh wow, that's really good actually."

He said, popping his tongue after he had swallowed. I grinned widely before grabbing the cheese out of the fridge.

"I'm very glad to hear that."

I said, covering the whole dish in white. He just kind of laughed at me.

"You really are trying to fatten me up aren't you?"

He joked. I sent him a knowing look.

"Hey, it's not my fault your favorite food is water."

He scoffed at me, opening and closing his mouth, circling his hand in the air to make a point, wanting to protest but coming up empty handed.

"Okay yeah that's fair."

he said in defeat, dropping the spoon onto the counter. i sent him a  knowing look before opening the over door. I put the dish in and set the timer, turning back to him as he dipped the spoon back into the pot. I laughed a little bit at him as he watched me put ingredients away.

"At least I can get you to eat what I cook,"

I said fondly.

"It's helping me out bunches cause I get to try new recipes with you and you'll give me honest feedback."

He beamed at me as I scooted the parsley into a pile at the edge of the cutting board.

"Happy to help."

He quipped back. I leaned into the counter, against my elbows and stared at him. He was so cute still kind of flustered. Then I heard his stomach growl and his face fell. I laughed.

"I guess you came at just the right time."

I said as the timer went off. He blushed again, scratching the back of his neck.

"I guess so."

i slapped the counter with my hand, raising my brows before getting the dish back out. the cheese was now melted over everything and it looked amazing.

"wanna get plates?"

i asked, dancing across the room to get something to serve with. he stood and did as asked, pulling to plates from the cabinet next to him. he set them down, side by side as i scooped the chicken out onto each plate, followed by the pasta, twirling it in a circle to get the sauce into it. he smiled down at it as i sprinkled the parsley on top.

"yum."

he said as i plucked utensils out of the drawer in front of me, offering them to him as well as the plate.

"thanks babe."

he said endearingly, offering me a quick kiss before walking over to the two person table across the room by the window. as i followed him i stood and stared for a second, noting how the light hit his face just right. he went to dive in before realizing i hadnt sat yet, looking up at me with drawn brows.

"whats wrong?"

he asked, holding the knife in one hand and the fork in the other. i just shook my head and sat.

"its nothing, just admiring the art work."

he looked around him for a second, making me laugh.

"did you make a new piece?"

he asked, looking at me quizzically before taking a bite and melting into it. i mirrored him, finally cutting into my own plate.

"i was talking about you you nicotine addicted idiot."

i said lightheartedly and his expression dropped, his mouth still full of food.

"oh."

he managed before swallowing. i shook my head at him, amused.

"you think im art?"

he said, trying a cute voice and making me laugh.

"well i dont just let anything walk right into my house unannounced."

i quipped back and he shook his head at me, raising his glass before drinking it.

"if im the art then im glad i have a gallery to hang in and be admired."

it was my turn to blush at his words, feeling the heat rise to my face as he stared me down across the table.

"youll always have space here as long as i keep getting to admire you."

i watched as he finally cracked a real smile, teeth showing and all, one of my favorite parts of him. he had such a pretty smile but he didnt show it very often, being a hard rock star and all.

"thanks baby."

i put my glass to my lips.

"besides, who else would i con into trying my weird recipes."

he shook his head at me.

"i have no idea."

[namjoonchronicles]

serenada | nj

↳ genre fluff, domestic 

↳ words 2.4k

↳ summary –it’s the little things in life that matters. 

↳ warning none

↳ namjoonchronicles’ honorary tag list @kai-tashi @joon94net @yourlocalalien @septemberalien @yoongiseesaw

↳ special thanks to @majestikblue & @fangirlaholicxx

↳ song this story was written with bts ‘jamais vu’

With the sound of chirping birds, accompanied by the rush of warm water between your toes, and coddling sands underneath your feet, you hugged your cardigan tighter, smiling to yourself at a new found freedom you had fought for yourself. Hair swishing back at every strike of wind, the scent of the sea makes you feel quite at home.

Sometimes, it doesn't matter how many times you went down the same road, trying to change how fate unfolds, things will turn out how they're supposed to. We are humans, and not exempted from mistakes. It's when you stand at a cross road knowing fully well that it will never be the last you'll be faced with. The only remedy is to have a hand to hold, when it arrives. Not because you're weak or incompetent. But because you'll need the support.

One week earlier....

Lunch table is set on a beautiful Friday. While your eldest is attending his piano lessons, you only have your four year old baby girl with you at home. Stir-fried beef, steamed broccoli and potatoes with peppers, sliced kimchi and fried anchovies. Pretty simple set up for today. If you knew he was going to be home, you would have bought some chicken, but you know he's not the kind to complaint about what you place on the table for him. Setting the final side bowl of soybean paste soup with beansprouts, you get to your daughter’s eye-level and told her,

"Call dad to come eat..." you say gently, word-by-word, "'Dad, let's eat...' like that." She nodded enthusiastically.

"Knock first..." you reminded her with a smile. You know that he loves listening to the little one calling him that. Its rare and it makes him happy. The little big happiness in life, he said.  

The little one did as told. Curling her little fingers and knuckles barely touching the door to Namjoon's studio door. She is tall enough to twist the knob on her tip toes but she didn't do that. She repeated the phrase you taught her twice, but no answer. Curious, you came and join her, twist the knob open to see Namjoon sitting in his chair turned away from the door. His hand on the phone pressed against his ear, he glances over his shoulder and waved his hand to shoo you and your daughter away. It seemed to be an important call. With that stern look in his eye, you're sure to shut the door before you leave. The little one pouted. As she waddled to the dining table before you, she kept her head down.

"Dad is a little busy, he'll eat later... we could eat first," you rubbed her back and carried her on her chair. She can feed herself although slightly sloppy, she was eating very well. She glances at Namjoon's empty bowl from time to time. Because you're very keen, you asked her why. She answered, "Dad's going to be very hungry later. Working, working, always working."

"Dad needs to pay the bills to keep the roof above our head, so daddy's not going to be here often but mama hopes you'll forgive him for being that way? He's trying so hard..."

"I miss dad..." She said.

A few hours later, you took your baby girl to fetch her older brother from piano lesson. Koya, the nickname his dad got him, climbed into the car looking drained. You looked at him through the rear view mirror and beamed at him, but he didn't reply the same enthusiasm.

"How was class, darling?" "I advanced to Grade 7 now, there's placement exam next week..." "Oh, that's amazing. Remember to tell dad later!"

You turned the wipers on because it began to drizzle, your son didn't respond immediately after you told him to tell his dad. And when he did, your heart breaks.

"Why? He's not coming anyways."

Not wanting to drag the sadness, you turned the blinkers to the city instead of the road home. Koya, one who remembers the direction exceptionally well notices this. He swivels his head around to see the hanging bridge you were supposed to use, getting farther and farther away. "Mama? Our house is that way....."

"Home is cancelled. We're getting ice cream." "But it's raining." "Exactly." "Yay! Ice cream!" The youngest one exclaimed.

That was the biggest smile you had seen on her face all day. Your son was confused, but he will retaliate soon. He's such a big loser when it comes to sweet things and he got that from his father, obviously. Parking by the convenient store, you sat on the table with the view outside the street. Next to you is Koya and his little sister, all eating different kinds of ice cream. You wanted something sour, Koya wants the strawberry one and the youngest prefers vanilla.

Passing behind you, an elder woman scoffs, "Why are you feeding your children ice cream on a rainy cold day. They're going to get ill." Koya turns around and spat, "Ice creams makes mama happy. What's wrong with being happy?"

You bowed and wore a stricken smile on your face. The old lady scurried along with her things before returning to buy an ice cream herself.

"Koya,"  you called. His heavy glasses runs down half of his face but he answers, "Hmm?"

"Do you hate Dad?" "I don't hate him. I just want him to be more like dads. Making money is not everything..." "Money? Is that what he told you?" "Yeah, that time is money. With each time taken away from us, he is making money. That's what he said. I checked dad's net worth the other day and I calculated that he makes roughly, 6.78 dollars an hour." "Koya, how did you..." you frowned but shakes your head, "Anyways, dad has always been busy. We should be more understanding, that's what I think. That's what mama thinks."

Just then, your baby girl froze. Koya checks on her, "You okay?" She giggles and her lips are trembling, "Yes, my brain poof." "You mean, brain freeze?" Koya puffed his cheeks.

Driving home, Namjoon still left his bowl undisturbed. You have to talk to him. Somehow. Koya showered, and then your girl, and then they're tucked in bed. As the night progresses, the lonelier you became. Now that your kids are in bed and sleeping, the house is quieter. You hated it. Listening to Koya not wanting to tell Namjoon that he has advanced piano exams soon, and your girl mumbling how she misses her dad had made you upset that when you staring at the night sky through the glass door, your visions blurred. You're hugging your leg, sitting on the sofa facing the opened curtains with the lights off, leaning your head on the side, on the cushion.

Namjoon twisted the door knob open, and the hallway is dark, catching him off guard. Did the power outage happen when he's in there? Why didn't anyone notify him? He watched you there, sitting in the dark but didn't think much of it.

"Not asleep yet?" he mumbles to your back as he walked out of the hallway into the kitchen to grab a glass of cold water. "I didn't feel like sleeping yet," you answered simply. "Probably all those coffee you've been having," he shot nonchalantly and walked back into his studio. Your gaze shot to the side, your fingers fiddling with your toe, jaw hanging at the answer your husband gave you. You only caught the view of his back, and his white tees walking away. With a script in your head, you slipped off the couch and walked slowly to his studio.

"Can I talk to you? Can we talk?"

Namjoon swivels his chair around to see you standing by his door frame, crossing your arm. The light from the hallway make you look like you had a halo. He smiled at you but you didn't return the same warmth.

"You didn't eat anything I cook," you shrugged. "I was going to but I got carried away... I was going to, I promise," he said in a hurry, sipping hard on the cold water he took himself. "Namjoon, if you're going to be like this at home, I suggest you don't take your work here," you started off strong. And you know that because Namjoon's expression changed from warmth to confusion.

"Like what? I don't understand... I'm home because you told me to be here more often..." "You're home but you're not... home," your voice breaks, "You're not here."

Taking out a crumpled invitation letter out of your cardigan, and you held them out to place on his desk instead of waiting for him to take them from you.

"There's two of that, one for mom, one for dad. I found yours in the bin," you sniffed, wiping your nose with the back of your sleeves. Namjoon remains quiet, but his eyes are receiving every information. He doesn't say anything in rebuttal and for that, you're thankful.

"Your daughter is mad at you, so I don't know how you'll fix this but I wish you would learn that being a father is not just providing financial stability. It's about emotional and physical presence as well. You of all people should know. You taught me that," you moved away, digging your eye sockets with the heels of your palm as you leave your husband to understand what you told him.

With the way you ended the conversation, one-sided conversation, Namjoon knows he's not welcomed in the bedroom that night. It didn't take a genius to to know. When he woke up on his studio couch, unaware that he had slept on his hand instead of the pillow, his shoulders began to strain. When his eyes flutters open, several teddies were lined around him like he was going to be sacrificed in a satanic cult. Then he felt little nails scratching his ankle bone, picking the skins there. His daughter is looking at him through her bangs, with wide brown irises decorating her rosy cheeks and baby bird lips, she is an unsplitting image of you.

He spread his arm open for her and she understood what it meant, and for that, Namjoon is thankful.

"Is Dad working until late night? Are you still tired?"

Namjoon nodded. Suddenly she escapes Namjoon's arms and ran down the hall into her room where her brother Koya is still sleeping soundly. When she comes back, she took a small container full of her vitamin gummy bears and a piggy bank.

"What's this, baby?" he asked groggily. "For your body, so daddy can be strong, like me," she smiled, and a dimple dip on the left side of her cheek. That side is deeper than the right one. And, she pushed the piggy bank next to Namjoon's feet, sitting with her knees folded, "For bills. I saved a lot."

Namjoon was stunned.

"Did you save money so daddy could pay bills?"

She nods, while playing with her customized KAWS doll, "So Dad doesn't have to work all the time and play with mama, with Koya and with me."

Several hours later...

"Are you sure? Are you absolutely sure?" you repeated as you were pushed out the house, all dressed up. Namjoon chuckles, "Yes, mama. Tell mama we're going to be okay without her."

Koya was smiling and the youngest were jumping in place. When you heard, you thought you were dreaming. He said that you should go watch movie, shopping and walk on the seaside while he takes the kids to Everland, the largest theme park in Seoul. Not only that, he wants to take them there, without you. So they could bond. Make up for the lost times. No cooking, no pee checks, just get dressed and enjoy yourself. He wants today with the kids and tomorrow, you can join if you want.

"Okay, behave yourself. Koya, and you, and daddy too. Don't give him a hard time alright? Hold daddy's hands at all times, you understand me?" you warned Koya and the little one, darting your eyes at Namjoon next, "And if you don't answer my text or calls, I will come with a butcher knife."

And that's how you ended at the seaside. Life is not a game. You can't press restart at every mishap even though you wish you could. And remedies don't come immediately or in the form you'd expect them to be. It's okay, but it's not okay--a phrase you've grown accustomed to as the years passed. No matter how many times you repeat the story line, tweak whatever you did in the middle of it, the ending is what fate wants them to be. With Namjoon, things can get a little hazy, sometimes foggy. But you know one thing. That his love is real. Even if he needs to be reminded how to be a person sometimes.

He took a seat next to you on the wooden bleacher while the kids runs around the field, playing with rented bicycles and shrieking in delight. You peeled your eyes away from the kids and stare at your husband's side profile.

"I want to say I'm sorry," he begin. Namjoon blinks to the floor, scratching his forehead, blinking repeatedly. "Honestly, I am so warped with perfection that I fail to see the things around me that are also taking shape," he pressed his lips together and straightening in his seat, "I make a lot of mistakes and I'm learning. There's errors I cannot fix but I'm grateful that you called me out before it becomes permanent."

"What are humans without mistakes..." you scooted closed to him, and leaned your head on his shoulder, "I didn't want you to miss a big part of these children's life. You're maybe the nations' greatest philosophy professor, but you're their father and you're all they have... You're all I have, too. I don't want to fight the world for your attentions, and I don't want my kids to do the same thing I've been doing for years."

Namjoon links his head with yours, looking over your children playing. "I need Kim Namjoon back, my Kim Namjoon," you flutter your eyes shut, feeling safe with his arms around you. He doesn't say a word in reply, but brushes his lips on the crown of your head, and tightening his hold around you. His wedding band shimmering on his laced fingers while yours scratching the materials of his sweater.

"I'll love us better now." He promised.

.

.

.

copyright © 2019 namjoonchronicles do not repost, sorry it’s just 2.4k words

[niallismymuse]

Chapter 7

For the second time in barely a week, Tessa moped around her apartment for two whole days. It irritated her, but she couldn’t seem to force herself out of the slump; and it sure as hell irritated her new roommate Leah. When she came home after work to find that Tessa hadn’t moved from her spot on the couch, plopped right in the center with a pink blanket draped over her head, Leah finally snapped.

“Girl, what the fuck is going on with you?”

Tessa scrunched her face up, lifting her chin up defiantly. “I’m sulking.”

Leah threw her hands up in the air. “Yeah, I understand that. But why.”

Tessa nestled herself further into the blanket nest she had made on the couch these past two days. She had accumulated quite a few blankets, but this pink one draping over her was by far her favorite. It was the softest and the cuddliest. “I had a bad night the other night.”

“Yeah, I remember, Tessa. You came home from Hamilton and went straight to your room without saying a word, but I could see the mascara streaks. Stop making me pull this out of you and just tell me. As your roommate, I command it.” Leah settled down on the couch beside her, shoving over some blankets to sit more comfortably.

Tessa huffed out a dry laugh; she really had won the lottery with this one. Even though Leah was now harassing her about her problems, she was thankful for her. So, without looking at her, Tessa told her everything, starting with information from months ago to give her the whole story: how Jess had moved out, and she had met Niall at the party Jess and Lyrica threw. How while she and Niall had grown closer, she and Jess had drifted apart. Having a crush on him for the longest time, and all of the shenanigans that had gone on at the cabin, including the nasty words Jess had uttered – and then she caught Leah up with what had happened before and after Hamilton, and how crushed she was because of it.

Leah whistled lowly under her breath. “Well, damn. You’ve had quite the busy new year.” She shot Tessa a reproachful look. “Didn’t I ask you before I moved in if there was any drama happening?”

Tessa shrugged sheepishly. “I was over the situation with Jess when you moved in, almost. The shit with Niall just happened. Technically, I didn’t lie to you.”

Leah chuckled lowly and shook her head. “I guess you’re right. And that’s okay. I don’t mind. I actually like you, so I don’t mind helping you out. Now look at me, Tessa.” Tessa shuffled herself sideways in her blankets to face her, watching as Leah flipped her light brown waves over her shoulder and stared at her directly in the eyes. “Niall is a dick.”

Tessa’s lips parted, and then she frowned. “Well, I don’t really –“

“Shush. He’s a dick. From everything you’ve told me, it sounds like he doesn’t want the drama of being in a relationship with you. He doesn’t want the publicity, because hey, you’ve got it. I was wondering why I saw your name trending briefly on Twitter the other, but I guess it was because you were spotted with him at Hamilton.”

Her brows furrowed together. She hadn’t looked at her phone since she had gotten home from Niall’s; she had tossed it into her dresser, actually, and it had probably died by now. Also, it kind of sucked that she only seemed to trend when she was spotted with Niall, but that was a problem to worry about at a later date.

Leah continued on. “And I don’t know what demons that man has about relationships and publicity, but if he was worth your time, he would have seen that you are totally and completely worth all of that hassle, Tessa. You’re an amazing woman, and not a bad roommate, except when you’re taking up the entire couch with your sadness. Now get your ass up, go take a shower, and come grocery shopping with me.”

Tessa blinked slowly, and then sighed as she sat up and squared her shoulders. “I am Tessa Love Jenkins, and if he doesn’t want to deal with the publicity our relationship would cause, he doesn’t deserve me.”

Leah clapped and nodded her head once in approval. “That’s right, girl.” Then her nose wrinkled up. “But seriously, go take a shower. You stink.”

Tessa genuinely laughed then and shook off all of the blankets before tossing them at Leah, who yelped and shoved them off. “Thanks, Leah. You’re the best.”

“I know, I know,” Leah muttered, dusting herself off before looking up and shooing her away. “Now go shower, I’m hungry. Also, you need to put these blankets in the wash.”

“As long as we get some chocolate cake, I’ll be glad to go,” Tessa called over her shoulder as she padded down the hallway, her bare feet slapping down lightly on the wooden floor. The blankets could wait. She retrieved her phone from her dresser first and plugged it in before going into the bathroom to shower. She caught a whiff of herself as she tugged her tank top off and nearly choked – yeah, Leah was right, she did stink. Going without showering for two days wasn’t good for her BO.

Despite the fact that she knew Leah was impatiently waiting for her to get ready, Tessa took her time. With every scrub of her loofah across her body, she wiped away all of her troubles. As she cleaned herself off, she cleared her mind, and reminded herself that if someone didn’t want her, they didn’t deserve her. And by the time she had finished showering, she felt newly-made.

Of course, it wasn’t that easy. As soon as her mind began to wander once again, she wondered about Niall and all of the reasons why he would lead her on like that. Except this time, she wasn’t sad about it. She was getting properly angry.

“The nerve of that asshole,” Tessa growled as she marched out of her room, dressed and ready to go. She snatched her purse from its spot on the end table by the door and swung open the door. Leah watched her; one eyebrow was raised. “Who does he think he is, acting like that?”

Leah didn’t answer, but she definitely listened as Tessa ranted and raved about all of the injustices Niall had done her. She didn’t list any of the good things – didn’t mention the flowers he had bought her once– because she still felt confused about why he did those things if he was only going to reject her. But it felt good to just actively complain instead of mope around.

Leah didn’t seem to mind; she merely looked bemused as she drove the two of them to the closest Trader Joe’s.

Tessa couldn’t help muttering one last thing as they walked inside, “And you know what? I really liked Hamilton, and now I won’t be able to enjoy it without remembering how my night was ruined.”

Leah chuckled to herself as she grabbed a basket. “We’ll find some other musical for you to enjoy. Now quit whining, let’s get this shopping done.”

Tessa rolled her eyes and huffed. “Aye aye, captain.”

They wandered through the store, picking up groceries. Tessa wanted to cook a nice meal for dinner to cheer herself up, and after debating with Leah for a few minutes on what they wanted, they decided on chicken parmesan, and Tessa would make a chocolate cake from scratch for the dessert. It would be a nice roommate-bonding activity.

And honestly, Tessa felt better once she had gotten out of the apartment. She still felt very bitter about everything that had happened, but she knew she would be okay, and that one day, she would be able to let it go. Today was not that day, and that was fine.

Once they were back at the apartment, Tessa let Leah pull up a recipe to make the parmesan chicken, even though she knew how to make it herself. But she had a chocolate cake to bake, and she couldn’t control everything, so she took a deep breath and began making the batter.

This chocolate cake was going to have crushed M&Ms and Reese’s cups inside of it, a ganache coating on top, and more crushed candy on top of that. It was definitely a ‘getting-over-someone’ sort of cake, and Tessa planned on eating at least two thirds of it herself. It was going to be fucking delicious.

Leah hummed as she breaded and fried the chicken breasts, and as she boiled the thin spaghetti noodles. Tessa resisted watching her every move, let her shoulders slump, and focused on making the best damn cake she could.

And it turned out to be a good time for the two of them. Eventually Leah started humming a song that Tessa actually recognized, so she began to sing along, which gravitated towards a singing competition between the two women as they prepared their specific dishes. With the singing competition came laughter.

Tessa put her cake in the oven after Leah was finished using it, put the oven timer on for roughly twenty minutes (she liked to check after a certain amount of time to figure how much longer it would bake) and then set the table.

Leah grinned as she brought out the nice platter Tessa had dug out, full of food. She set it down – on it were six chicken filets, fried and covered in sauce and cheese. In bowls beside it were the spaghetti noodles and steamed vegetables. Tessa picked out two nice wine glasses and popped a bottle, setting it on the table between their spots.

It was a meal to be proud of.

Tessa served herself and took a bite. “This is really good, Leah!”

Leah snorted as she mashed her noodles lightly with her fork. “You don’t need to sound that impressed.”

Laughing, Tessa poured herself a quarter glass of wine. “Take it as a compliment.”

Leah stuck her tongue out, and the evening carried on quite nicely. The dinner was delicious, and once the cake was cooled and the ganache was poured over it along with the candy, they had dessert. Tessa and Leah talked and laughed, drank wine and ate cake, and got more than a little tipsy. It was the happiest she had felt in a long time, and throughout the entire event, she didn’t think of Niall once.

Everything was going to be just fine.

✩✩✩

Or at least, Tessa sure hoped so. As time went on, she tried her hardest to move on and to get out of the apartment more, away from work. It was hard sometimes – she had always felt very strongly that if she wasn’t working on improving her channel in some way, whether it was planning out new videos, recording or editing, she wasn’t working hard enough.

But she had lost a bit of that, since Niall. She had always been willing to put work aside for him; now she needed to put work aside for her.

It worked in a rather funny way, because she both didn’t work as hard and worked much harder. On one hand, she did try and leave the apartment more often. That led to her running into more fans, which was awesome. She never minded that. On the other, when she was working on her channel, she focused wholeheartedly on it. Her brain was firing out new video ideas left and right, and it was all she could do to write them down and focus on what she was currently working on.

Not only that, but she found out that she could go to VidCon this coming summer. It would be announced later on in the year, but she had to come up with a piece for her set. Tessa wasn’t even sure exactly what she was going to end up doing – most likely a panel and a meet and greet, since she wasn’t quite big enough to have something more complicated.

Yet that wasn’t all, either. Tessa had decided she wanted to put on a charity livestream and raise money for an organization a while ago, but now she was making sure it would be happening. Everything needed to be done for that still, including what would happen during the livestream and, oh yeah, what organization she wanted to donate to. Definitely one related to the oceans and oceanic support. Maybe she would check into what organizations David Attenborough contributed to or supported.

Leah had said that she would take that day off and help her record – Tessa thought she might do a cooking portion and show off her all-time favorite recipe, and obviously she would need help filming that. She would just need to teach Leah how to use the camera properly, maybe go over some fake shoots to help her learn.

It was a lot. In fact, Tessa was surprised she could even sleep at night, her brain was so full of activity. But it helped her move on – she had less time to dwell on the past, and with that came a sense of peace with what had occurred. She wasn’t thrilled with what had happened, but she could accept that it did.

Not that she didn’t occasionally think of Niall. In the beginning, that was all Tessa really did. She thought about him all the time and wondered if he thought about her. She even stalked his social media feed to see if she could perceive any hidden messages, but of course she couldn’t. That was ridiculous, and that half-hidden hope is what finally convinced her to leave it be.

Now she still followed him on Twitter and Instagram – because everyone would notice if she suddenly didn’t, and she was too tired for that drama – and occasionally saw his tweets or posts there. Tessa didn’t reach out, and neither did Niall.

It was fine. Everything was fine.

One late afternoon, Tessa was sat at the dining room table, typing away on her personal laptop. She used the desktop in her room to upload and edit videos, since the storage amount was much higher. This laptop was for travelling purposes and occasionally for typing scripts, if she didn’t feel like sitting at the desk in her room. As bright and cheerful as she tried to make her personal space be, it could get kind of gloomy sitting in there all the time.

Tessa propped her legs up on the chair opposite hers and sighed. Watery sunlight filtered in through the light blue curtains that adorned the windows in the living room. It was a little chilly inside – it was early February, so the air still had a bite to it in LA most days, but it heated up enough in the middle of the day to keep the AC on.

Leah was working and closing tonight, so she wouldn’t be home until after midnight since her Starbucks closed at 11. Tessa had gotten used to Leah’s schedule; she already planned to put some leftovers from dinner on a plate and stick it in the fridge, so Leah could eat when she got home.

The TV wasn’t on. There was nothing but silence and the occasional clacking of her typing. The lack of noise irked her for some reason. Normally the TV was on, or Leah was lounging on the couch and complaining about her coworkers. But Leah wasn’t home, and she didn’t feel like listening to the idle chatter of the television. Maybe she should call her mother and listen to her chatter for background noise. That would fill up the apartment for sure.

Tessa sighed once more and frowned at her laptop, and at the script in front of her. Her brows furrowed. The script didn’t seem right. It was supposed to be about college and some of her own experiences, but nothing was clicking in her brain – maybe this idea was a dud. It happened. But she couldn’t seem to let it go, so she forced herself to keep typing, even though she was convinced that the more she typed, the more gibberish appeared on the page.

Someone knocked on the door. It was a light, timid sound, almost as if the hand that made it didn’t want to be knocking.

Lifting her eyebrow, Tessa stood up and shut her laptop. No one was supposed to come over today, and Leah would have texted if she had gotten off early. That and she had her own key. So, who was at the door?

Hope had her heart thumping just a bit faster. Maybe it was Niall, come to apologize and beg for forgiveness.

That was a ridiculous thought, but Tessa kept it close as she meandered over to the door and swung it open.

It was Jess.

That hoped swelled and burst like a popped balloon, deflating faster than it had any business to. “Oh,” Tessa said, disappointment coloring her voice, “it’s you.”

The words were harsh, and she didn’t apologize for them, though Jess did wince. “Ouch,” she replied, voice soft, but it was obvious she knew that she deserved it by the way she didn’t bite back. In fact, Jess looked awful – her eyes were tinged red and swollen, as if she had been crying. Her lips were chapped and pouted, and her normally perfectly-styled brunette waves were greasy and held up in a messy bun. “Um. Hi.”

Tessa leaned against the doorway and crossed her arms over her chest. She didn’t know how she was supposed to feel with her ex-best friend standing in front of her, but she felt a lot of nothing currently. “Hi.”

Jess wrung her hands together, fingers twisting and interlocking before pulling apart and starting over again. “Um. Lyr and I have been fighting lately, and I just…I couldn’t stay at the apartment. I needed to get out. But I had nowhere to go, and…”

“And so, you came running back to me,” Tessa finished icily for her, ignoring the look Jess gave her, a mix of reproach and sorrow.

“I guess I did. I know we’re not on the best of terms, but I was wondering if I could stay here for a few days, in my old room.” Jess looked up through her lashes at her, and for the first time since Jess had arrived, Tessa felt a spark of anger.

“Well, Jess, your old room is currently not available. I have a new roommate, Leah.” Tessa told her and felt a bitter satisfaction at how crushed she looked. Had she been hoping that Tessa would just keep that room empty, in case she came back? That was shitty. But the more she looked down at the pathetic form of her old friend, the more pity she felt. “But you can come inside for a while.”

Without another word, Tessa stalked inside, not even caring to see if Jess followed. She could hear her tentative footsteps well enough to know that she had. Tessa snatched her laptop from the dining room table and headed towards her bedroom, pausing long enough to mutter, “make yourself at home,” over her shoulder before closing her door behind her.

Tessa exhaled sharply and sat down hard on the floor, right by the door she had just definitely shut. This was too much. Nausea swirled in her stomach. Barely twenty feet away was the woman she had cried over, the woman she had missed so much. The woman who had hurt her, pretty badly.

Yeah, she might go throw up.

Tessa wasn’t a confrontational person, but she also wasn’t a non-confrontational person, falling somewhere in between. And as she sat there on the chilled wooden floor, she knew she wouldn’t be able to focus on her work with the knowledge that Jess was sitting in her living room.

After giving it a few more minutes – she really didn’t want to do this – Tessa crawled up off of the floor and pulled her door open. She poked her head out, only to see Jess sitting on the couch with her knees pulled up to her chest, gazing into the distance. She didn’t seem to notice as Tessa warily approached the couch.

“I’m pissed at you,” Tessa blurted out, because it seemed the right thing to say, and then she defiantly crossed her arms over her chest. Her voice sounded whiny and not-at-all tough, which she hated, but what was done was done.

Jess let out an airy laugh and rubbed at her face. “I’m well aware, Tessa. And you have a right to be.”

“So why did you say that shit about me to our friends while I was in the cabin? In fact, why would you say that shit at all?” Tessa pressed on, frowning tightly down at Jess. She squeezed her arms over her chest tighter, trying not let herself reach out and just slap her. “That really hurt me, and you know what, you don’t know anything about my friendship with Niall, so I don’t know why you thought you had the right to say that, especially when you know I would never do that.”

“That’s exactly the point, Tessa! I had no idea what was going on with your friendship with Niall, except that you were spending more time with him than you were with me!” Jess exploded, leaping to her feet. “You stopped fucking spending time with me, and even when we did hang out, all you talked about was him!”

Tessa’s jaw had dropped about halfway through Jess’ rant. Faintly, she realized that she should probably shut her mouth, but she didn’t even remember how.

Jess didn’t seem to mind her silence, and instead carried on. “Yeah, I stopped talking to you. You know why? Because you were so far up Niall’s ass it didn’t seem worth my time.”

Tessa finally remembered how to speak. “Why didn’t you say anything to me about it, then? Why did you just hold it in and get so resentful about it?” Her voice was weak and trembling, and her eyes burned. She hadn’t ever considered that maybe Jess had stopped speaking with her because of her actions. Their fight years ago had reversed roles.

Jess shrugged one shoulder; her eyes downcast. “I don’t know, Tessa, I guess I didn’t want to rain on your parade. I know you really liked him, and I didn’t want to get in the way of that.”

Tessa managed to lift an eyebrow. “So, instead, you bottled everything inside and decided to talk shit about our friendship, potentially to make him think I was using him for fame.”

Pushing out a sharp breath, Jess shrugged again and looked up once more, her eyes meeting Tessa’s. “I’m not trying to say it was the right thing to do. I regret it a lot, and I really wish I hadn’t acted that way. I’m sorry”

Rubbing at her arms, Tessa shook her head mutely, unsure of how to proceed from this point onward. Jess had really hurt her; but she, in turn, had apparently really hurt Jess. What she had said was shitty and unnecessary, but Tessa had been a bad friend before that.

“Well…I’m sorry I was being a terrible friend.” Tessa muttered, the words feeling stiff and awkward on her tongue – it was odd to be apologizing when, up until a few minutes ago, she hadn’t been aware she had done anything wrong. And, in her mind, what Jess did was way more fucked up. “I guess the stuff you said about me and Niall doesn’t matter anyway; we’re not friends anymore.”

Jess full-on gasped. “What the fuck? What do you mean? Tessa, he was so obvious about how much he liked you, how come you guys aren’t friends now?!”

Tessa frowned. “I didn’t consider him to be that obvious about his feelings, but I’ll get back on that later.” She took a deep breath and spilled – everything that had happened at Hamilton, without expressly revealing that his ticket was supposed to be hers. By the end of her story, Jess was frowning too, and clicking her tongue.

“I’m sorry, Tessa, I really thought that you two would end up together. Honestly. I saw how he looked at you while we were at the cabin; he looked at you like you were the brightest star in the night sky.”

Tessa stared down at the floor and scuffed her foot along it, trying to ignore the emotions that churned inside of her at those words. “Well. It doesn’t matter anymore.”

Jess stepped forward and enveloped her in a hug. Tessa was stiff at first, not sure if she wanted this, but then she relaxed and wrapped her arms around her best friend, sighing softly. Tears pricked at her eyes and she sniffled, and Jess laughed quietly and patted her back gently. “Sorry for being a bitch.”

“I accept that apology,” Tessa murmured, but didn’t offer up another of her own, causing them both to laugh.

“I should go home. Lyrica will be glad we’re friends again.”

Tessa wondered, then, if maybe Lyrica had made this whole thing happen. If she had suggested Jess come over and mend things with Tessa. She almost asked, but then bit her tongue and hugged Jess just a tiny bit harder.

It didn’t matter. She had her best friend back.

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[tjkiahgb]

Episode Recap: 3.06, “Cookie Monster”

Well, another week running a humorous (in theory) Andi Mack blog. Can’t wait to make jokes about what happens on the show this episode.

Let’s just check the episode title.

Nice, nice. Sounds funny. Lighthearted. I can do something with this.

*cracks knuckles*

Well, let’s get to work--

Oh? Children and guns. Ok. That’s... that’s a little dark.

But, I mean, I can probably still make this fun if I--

Ah, real life tragedy. Ok then.

Well, I certainly hope there’s at least another storyline in this episode that’s like, some kind of wacky, weird Invasion of the Body Snatchers type homage? I could definitely make jokes about that.

*crosses fingers*

Our episode begins with Andi, Bowie, and Bex at Bex’s place playing the Andi Game, which is where you just say stuff you know about Andi.

Bex is wiping the floor with Bowie by knowing lots of things about Andi like that she doesn’t like any condiments. None? How do you eat french fries? How do you eat tortilla chips? Dry? Who lives like that?

Bex taunts Bowie for losing. Bowie says it’s not fair, Bex and Andi have spent way more time together. I agree, the game is rigged. Just wait until they play the “How much do you know about The Renaissance Boys?” game. Then it’ll be Bowie’s time to shine.

Bex asks whose fault it is that Bowie hasn’t spent more time with Andi and Bowie’s like, it’s yours.

Which is such a valid point that Bex chooses to immediately ignore it and move on.

There’s a knock at the door and Bowie goes to check who it is. Turns out, it’s a tiny old lady whom Bowie refers to as “Mom.” She calls him “Steven” and they hug.

Bex tells Andi that Bowie’s actual first name is Steven. His license that one episode said Bowie, though, so did he change it legally? Why? “Steve Quinn” is a great name for a guitarist. It’s one of those names like Eric Clapton or Jeff Beck where you’re like, “That’s such a boring name, they have to be a good guitarist. They let the guitar do the talking.” Calling yourself “Bowie” is trying too hard. I guess that’s why The Renaissance Boys failed and Bowie’s stuck teaching guitar to some weird father/son duo in the back of a small record store.

Bowie’s mom, Cookie, goes around giving hugs to everyone.

Andi asks if it’s true Cookie lives on cruise ships. Cookie says yes, it’s like living in an apartment where your neighbors serve you drinks in coconuts. And, might I add, you also get the added excitement of knowing that one day your apartment building might sink into the ocean and drown you. So there’s that, too.

Cookie sees the mess they’re living in and offers to make the family dinner.

And dinner she makes, whipping together this...

...out of the stuff she had in her suitcase.

The family tries to figure out how this happened and Cookie says she never goes anywhere without a roast chicken, which is maybe the craziest thing anyone’s ever said on this show. I’d take it metaphorically except she really did literally have a chicken in her bag, otherwise where did this one come from?

And what was her plan if everyone had already eaten a nice meal? Leave the roast chicken just sitting in her suitcase with her clothes? Open the bag every now and then and pick at the meat like a vulture? Her neighbors on the cruise ship must hate her. “Oh God, here comes that lady that smells like chicken all the time. Just give her a coconut drink and she’ll leave you alone.”

Anyway, the family is so amazed to see food not served from a box, they don’t question any of this and sit down to eat.

At school the next day, TJ finds Cyrus in the hallway to ask him if he wants to hang out that weekend with his friends.

Cyrus is delighted to learn TJ has been talking about him to his other friends. I feel that. It’s just nice to be talked about, even if you’re not there. It’s why I leave every party by yelling “Later, suckers!” real loud and smashing a vase.

They agree to hang out and Cyrus calls his mom to let her know he’s been a topic of discussion.

Meanwhile, Buffy and Jonah walk to school. Buffy tells Jonah she likes his skateboard so he gives it to her.

They talk about going to the skate shop that weekend and have a fun time bantering back and forth until Principal Metcalf pounces on them and takes away the skateboard.

He can smell children having a nice time in his vicinity like a fun-killing bloodhound.

At Bex’s house, Bex and Bowie return to find Cookie has rearranged the furniture. Cookie asks if they love it and they don’t have the heart to tell her they don’t.

Bex wants to tell Cookie she’s not a fan of her coming in here and moving everything around without asking but then Cookie shows up with cookies like some kind of bribe and suddenly Bex can’t remember what upset her in the first place.

Out in the desert, TJ and his friends ride dirtbikes to off-brand rock n’ roll when Cyrus shows up.

TJ introduces him to his other friends, Lester and Reed.

Hold on one second. Lester? What in the world?

No one’s named their baby Lester in 150 years. In fact, I don’t believe in such a thing as a kid named Lester. Lester is the kind of name you only get as a middle aged adult. You wake up one day after turning 45, you realize you’re caught in a dead-end sales job, your hair is thinning, your face is getting droopy, and your dreams are unrealized. Then you check your wallet and see your ID has changed and it now says your name is Lester. And you accept that. You know why? Because you’re a Lester, and that’s what Lesters do. (Apologies to anyone reading this whose name is Lester, but, in my defense, I don’t believe you exist.)

I’ll tell you what Lesters don’t do: ride dirtbikes to off-brand rock n’ roll songs. Something’s up with this guy.

Anyway, TJ invites Cyrus to ride a dirtbike but Cyrus says he fears everything and that makes Reed laugh. Then Reed wishes to laugh more and he’s like, “Dance, clown!”

And Cyrus is like, I make observational humor. Reed laughs, appreciating that line from a meta-perspective.

Eventually they get Cyrus to try riding and TJ teaches him the in-and-outs of dirtbike usage.

Cyrus rides around on the bike and tries to make it up a hill. After a few failed attempts, and with encouragement from TJ and the others, Cyrus does something physical without hurting himself.

He does lose his shoe, though. However, as Cyrus notes, that’s really his brand at this point. He’s got lost shoes all over the county.

Andi returns home and finds her parents have become pod people.

Cookie has swaddled them and they no longer wish to live outside their cocoons. They want to change the channel but can’t, so Bowie calls for “Mommy.”

This episode’s got an aggressively strange energy to it.

Cookie tries to trap Andi in her web of motherly comfort, but Andi runs off before she can.

Over at Lost Art Skateboards...

...the one-stop shop for all your skateboarding and tattoo needs, Jonah and Buffy check out skate decks.

Buffy notices that Jonah doesn’t ever say “Docious magocious” anymore. Jonah feels like he grew out of it. I might argue there’s no age where docious magocious was ever a reasonable thing to say, but I guess we have different opinions on that sort of thing.

Buffy says she actually used to like when he said it. Jonah’s surprised because she used to make fun of it, but that’s why Buffy liked it.

Buffy spots the tattoo parlor connected to the skate shop and they go to check it out. They see a man there getting a tattoo and don’t immediately recognize him.

Yep, definitely not the profile of anyone they’ve ever seen before.

They talk about how crazy it is to get that many tattoos and whaaa--

It’s the principal?!

Jonah and Buffy run away like they just caught him chopping up a body in the woods.

Andi talks to Celia about her Cookie problem. See, Andi loves everything Cookie does, but everything about what’s she’s doing around the house feels weird and off-putting. Agree wholeheartedly.

Celia decides she’ll go check the situation out.

Back in the desert, Lester and Reed set up watermelons.

Cyrus has a question: are these watermelons for a watermelon eating contest? Love it. Love the thought process.

You ever just want to take a Saturday to go out to the desert with your bros, ride some dirtbikes, and then just chow down on watermelon? And preferably, chow down on that watermelon in some kind of competition of speed? I know I do.

I have a different question: whose job was it to lug three large watermelons out to the desert on their dirtbike? Lester, right? Freakin’ Lester.

Reed’s like, we aren’t eating the watermelons, we’re shooting them. Though, they could eat them after. No need to let perfectly good watermelon go to waste.

But the point is, the watermelons have to go pppffffghhttt first.

Or however you spell that. I feel like I’m missing some S’s in there?

And the only way for the watermelons to dopely go pppfffghhttt is to shoot them. Cyrus wants to know how they intend to shoot them and Reed shows him a bag. Cyrus’s face drops. Why?

Because inside the bag is Grandpappy Reed’s antique revolver from during the war. Not that Reed’s grandpa fought in the war. He also went out to the desert to shoot watermelons. It was a difficult time in our nation’s history and he needed to blow off steam.

Anyway, Reed’s Grandpa handed it down to his son, and then Reed stole it from him, and now it’s here, making Cyrus uncomfortable.

Cyrus goes to TJ to ask if he knew about the gun. TJ did. Cyrus says he’s leaving and he wants TJ to go with him, but TJ can’t bring himself to leave.

So Cyrus heads off alone.

Well that was a deep and dramatic moment. I wonder how we’re going to proceed from here.

Oh.

Andi finds her grandmother wrapped in a blanket, covered in food crumbs, and watching TV. Cookie made her a cookie and Celia was roped in.

Andi wanders into the kitchen and finds Cookie attempting to cut Bowie’s hair. She screams “No!” in panic.

She forces her other grandmother to drop the scissors, then pulls her away from the hair.

Bowie quietly watches this happen, then, without saying anything, reaches down, grabs a lollipop, sticks it in his mouth, and starts happily sucking on it.

Aggressively strange energy in this episode, man. Aggressively strange.

Andi talks to Cookie, who explains she’s being like this because she doesn’t get to see her family a lot so when she does, the mom thing kicks in. Plus being excited to meet Andi and all that.

Cookie says she has a gift for Andi. It’s a picture of Bowie as a baby eating dog biscuits.

This somehow answers and raises so many questions at the same time.

Bowie walks out and asks Cookie if she’s really leaving, and Cookie, like an old mariner, says yes, the seas are a-calling.

Andi and Cookie share one last hug before parting.

At school the next day, Jonah and Buffy dread running into Metcalf.

They hope to avoid him for the entire year. But they should know better than to show fear, because they emit a fear scent and that brings Metcalf right to them.

He admits it was weird for him, too, to run into them. He asks if they want to know about his tattoos and of course they do. He explains they’re all prison based. Or not. They’re based on him just wanting a tattoo. Or other stuff. I don’t know. We’re running out of time in this episode and gotta wrap things up so there’s no time to really get into it.

Metcalf’s like, guess you think I’m pretty cool now, huh? And Buffy’s like, no, you’ve ruined tattoos for me, thanks.

And Metcalf’s like, oh.

Then he rolls down his sleeve and runs off before Buffy and Jonah can see him cry. Buffy and Jonah fist bump in celebration of ruining Metcalf’s day.

Wow, way to make me feel bad for that lunatic.

Cyrus and Andi head to Metcalf’s office. Cyrus has come to tell him about the gun. He’s worried TJ will hate him for this.

Andi argues he could very well be saving TJ’s life.

Cyrus finds the courage to go in, but Metcalf meets him at the door. He invites him in and Cyrus finds a police officer waiting for him.

Cyrus wants to know if something happened, but Metcalf tells him everyone’s ok. The officer just has some questions. About the gun.

And you know the gun is a serious issue because even the police in this town don’t carry them.

Cyrus says he came in here to tell about the gun, but he’s surprised to find they already know.

Cyrus admits to being there and wants to know if he’s in trouble but the episode ends before we can find out.

So many questions up in the air:

1. Will Cyrus be in legal trouble just for being in the vicinity of a gun for a few seconds?

2. Who told them about the gun?

and, most importantly,

3. What kind of person names their child Lester?!

Come back in two weeks to find out the answers, Macketeers.

Except for the one about Lester. The world may never figure that one out.

[victakestaipei]

WEEK 2 RECAP: “Gua Bao?” More like “Gua BOMB.”

So I have come to realize that during the weeks, my blog posts about my classes are going to be pretty repetitive. So to save you the few minutes of your life you’ll spend reading, I’ll just shorten it a bit...and skip to the food. We always do the same things in class. We take quizzes, read the text book, practice writing characters, and talk alot about a wide array of topics... (we actually get off topic alot... In one of the classes this week I ended up playing the song “Mr. Roboto” on my iphone because I made a reference about it... we have a new classmate and he’s from Japan and everyone wanted to hear the “Domo Arigato” part... ugh.. it’s a long story.)

Anyway, let’s start from Tuesday I suppose:

So in class we had another one of those written dialogue quizzes, I got an A ((of course HEH)) and on the test from last week, I got a 94%! Feelin’ good. In the gym it was leg day, and I’m starting to incorporate more cardio daily, so I’ve been running on the treadmill at the end of my workouts. I want to drop weight and tone up while I’m out here so I figured this will help give me the extra kick that I need. I ran a mile in 7 minutes and 30 seconds... Or so I thought. I was super happy about the amount of time it took and how it didn’t even feel hard and how my knee actually wasn’t hurting for once in my life. BUT, I soon realized that I am a headass. I didn’t realize until later in the week that everything here is in kilometers, not miles. Meaning, that I didn’t actually run a mile in 7 minutes and 30 seconds, I ran 1 kilometer. Which is less than a mile... it’s actually 0.62 miles to be exact. What A BUZZ KILL!!!! I was on this “high” the whole rest of the day because I thought I was really wrecking shit, but really I’m just an idiot. A slow running idiot. lol. 

For dinner Bunny and I went to this popular joint that she had heard about from a friend. I actually have heard of this place too, but didn’t realize it until after we had arrived and ordered our food. We went to this small hole-in-the-wall restaurant in the Gongguan night market where they serve the “Traditional Taiwanese Snack.” It’s called “Gua Bao.” It’s basically a pulled pork hamburger with veggies, pickles, grated peanuts in a peanut sauce, and cilantro... all in a steamed bun... you hold it and eat it like a hamburger, and it’s delicious!! It was only 55 NT (about $1.80 US). You could choose between lean meat, fatty meat, or a mix of the two. I went with the lean meat, and I’m glad that I did. The restaurant also offered an array of soups, but a lot of them featured pork intestines, and that's not really my type of party. 

Wednesday:

I did back day at the gym today and ran another “mile”... SMH. That still gets me man. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

For lunch, Jeannie, Bunny and I went to this potsticker place right across the street from campus. We’ve been there before and it was really good the first time, with each potsticker being 5 NT! (or about 17 cents). We each ordered 10 potstickers and a bowl of warm noodles, totalling to only 90 NT ($3 US). I chose 5 curry potstickers and 5 garden vegetable. The Curry flavored potstickers were by far the best potstickers I’ve had since I’ve been here (and that’s saying something). And for dinner, Bunny and I went BACK to the Gua Bao place (it was that good) but this time brought Nick along! We had a good time.

Thursday:

I had another dictation quiz and got another low A. Today was leg day yet again. Starting to see a pattern here? I’m proud to say that I’ve kept the routine/schedule that I talked about in my recap blog post from last week..

For our post-gym lunch, Bunny, Jeannie and I went to this Soy Sauce-Braised place. I can’t remember the name. *eyeroll*. But basically it’s a food stand on the street market by our university, and they lay out all the meats, and veggies and noodles on display, and you choose which ones you want, and they mix them all together and cook them in this super hot soy sauce soup... It’s pretty good. I was super excited about this food stand because they actually had VEGETABLES!!! You know how often I see vegetables here in Taiwan??? Never. I don’t think I’ve had a vegetarian semi-healthy meal since I’ve been here. And I’ve looked!!!!! Anyway, for my dish, I chose tofu, broccoli, cabbage, mushrooms, and udon noodles. I paid about $7.50 US which is a bit steeper than my usual meal, but I think that’s because I doubled up on the tofu. (hehe). Either way though that’s still what I spend on average at Cane’s back in the US, and it’s wayyyyy more food. I do have to say that I went a bit over the top. My food was a MOUNTAIN!!!! We also bought this watermelon slush drink to share that came in an actual watermelon! Presentation get’s an A+, and it was pretty refreshing. 

After we ate we went to this store called “Jin Xin Fa” and bought tons of stationary (everything here is so cute and I desperately wanted to buy some cute planners for the upcoming school year). I also bought an extra long ethernet cord so that I could use my laptop in bed and have better internet, as well as a new phone charger... 

For dinner I ended up cooking (reheating) left over lunch... but I made rice and added scrambled egg to it... As it turns out, my $7.50 lunch fed me and Bunny for dinner. As I mentioned in my blog post about my dorm a few weeks ago, we have a small kitchen area at the end of the hall. Bunny and I wanted to use the rice cooker, and we struggled at first. We had to put water between the bowl where the rice goes and the outer bowl?? Strange. Either way thought the rice came out perfectly. Bomb.com.

Friday: 

For lunch, the three of us tried this Malaysian Curry place on the street market. It was on the second floor, and the interior looked like someone's home at first... My dish was 100 NT ( around 3-4$), and I ordered the Malaysian chicken curry and rice. It’s basically a filleted chicken cutlet fried in batter and served with a mound of rice, both covered in curry. And topped with potato wedges... THIS PLACE WAS SUPER GOOD I WILL BE BACK EVERY WEEK OH MY GOD. There is only one lady who works here, and she cooks all the dishes. I also think she lives here...? Not so sure. We spoke to her a bit after finishing our food, and she told us how 22 years ago she came to Taiwan, and she asked us where we're from and told us she's been to both Florida and New York before. She also showed us pictures of her 8 month old grandson who lives in Florida. Her daughter was born in Malaysia and currently lives in America as she's married to an American guy. She was the sweetest lady ever, gushing about her grandson and showing us all these videos. Such a lovely lady.

After lunch we did some shopping in the street market (clothing), I bought a shirt... and not much else because everything looked so small. When shopping one lady didn't let Jeannie use the dressing room to try on this outfit.... it seemed odd, and the lady didn’t seem to have a reason to not let her use the dressing room which was clearly there with the open curtain and no one inside. I think the lady who worked there was just a bitch. She was rude, and possibly racist?? I can’t tell you how many times I would walk into a shop (during the hour or so that we were walking around) and the ladies who work there would hover over me constantly. *eyeroll*. Figures.

We went home and I took a shower and relaxed before heading to Shilin Night market. I’ve been here before and posted a video, but in case you all forgot, it’s the biggest night market in Taipei and is pretty poppin on the weekends. Jeannie and I love to shop, so we had a ball!! Four of us went, it was Ada, Jeannie, Bunny and I. We spent a few hours shopping and walking around and eating the street food. I ate this pork bun sandwich, some French fries with a bunch of sauces on them (like mustard sauce, salt, pepper, etc), and tried the popular chicken fried steak. 

squid on a stick^

We stayed at Shilin a few hours before parting ways... Jeannie and I went to meet up with some others at a bar and Bunny and Ada went home. This is around maybe 11:15pm... Jeannie and I met up with Nick at this open patio bar/hookah lounge. It was $20 (US) all you can drink. The bar was called K House and was located smack dab in the middle of the gay district off of Ximen station. Ximen station is also a very popular shopping area for the younger crowd, with a 5 story H&M and other popular stores. It took a while for Jeannie and I to find the bar, we put it in google maps and it took us to a completely different location. By the time we found it a lot of the people we were meeting up with were loose off the goose. Which makes sense since it was all you can drink and they'd been there a few hours already. We left the bar around 1, and headed to 7/11 and walked around town a bit after that. I was pretty lit. I slammed about 5 drinks in 30 minutes and was just chillen after that. I had two jack/cokes, 1 vodka/sprite, and 3 peach flavored drinks but I don't know what alcohol was in those..?? They were super good though!! My favorite, definitely. We were walking to another bar when I got super tired and decided to take an Uber home with Jeannie and another guy we met that night, his name is Collin. Collin goes to school at Carnegie Melon *ooooooooo snap*. I got into my dorm around 2:30-3am, and went to bed around 3:30. When Jeannie and I were walking with the group, Collin was telling us about how he had plans to go snorkeling the next day and he invited us to join the group on Facebook. I knocked out after showering when I got home, since I had to be up by 7:15 to make it to the meeting spot at 8am to go snorkel. I was exhAUSTED. Snorkeling should be worth the lack of sleep though.

[hundredbillionbottles]

Just Chugging Along

A new coffee shop opened in Nailsea while I was away, replacing a pub which I had never been in and which was always skipped on even the biggest of pub crawls. I met Daisy there yesterday. Daisy is a girl in the school year below mine, just finished her A Levels, who is going to Colombia in January, enrolled in the same Gap Student Programme as I finished about a month and a half ago. She wanted to ask some questions about the job, the country, the culture, and I found myself almost self-indulgently spewing out any relevant information that popped into my head, rarely pausing to take breath. It felt good to rant so gleefully about my time away, instinctively babbling out advice and recommendations, having an answer to every question that she asked and seeing the nerves and excitement build in her as the conversation went on. It was like a confirmation that it had indeed happened, that I hadn’t just imagined or dreamed it; it was real and I loved it enough to want someone else to love it too.

In the nigh-on-month I’ve been home, the coffee shop is the only thing in Nailsea that appears to be new. A couple of shops and business ventures finding their feet in the town centre in January had ran out of legs by July it would seem, but everything else is basically the same; the same faces are scattered round The Moorend Spout on quiz night; the usually interchangeable neighbours in the house next to mine look as if they are the same; the buses are so late that they’re technically early in proximity to the next one, and the wind blows the first days of August silly and cold. Spoons is dead on weeknights and rammed on Friday and Saturday, full of the local football heroes, the ‘hands-on’ figures of the community, the hard-workers, the pre-drinkers, the students back from uni (usually grouped together with the pre-drinkers), and a small congregation of twats in the corner. And in the morning we all step outside to the same smell of horse shit and weed, the latter of which was so strong this past week that it actually made headlines in the North Somerset Times. But amidst all the similarities, I feel the comforting pass of time through every conversation I have. My friends for the most part are happier, more grounded in the people they are and want to be and firmly on their paths to achieve that. Nearly everyone I bump into has something to show for the past half-a-year; Ellie finished her first year at university with a first; Cop’s started designing and printing his own clothes; I haven’t seen Cara yet but she finished her A Levels as is currently blessing the States with her ridiculousness; I saw my old work-friend Genevieve in a play devised by her and her theatre company, whose existence I only knew of beforehand through snippets of conversation over early morning mass sandwich production. Hell, to be fair to them, the twats in the corner at spoons have progressed in some way, in that they’re into harder drugs now. So although the town itself is as still as it’s always been, I’ve returned in exciting times. I can feel everyone starting to get into their stride, transforming from school friends into real people.

I had a fantastic time in the States. I loved travelling, or rather vacationing alone, making my own spontaneous plans each day and meeting several other travellers whom I’d met the night before for breakfast. I drank malts with a couple from Brighton in Atlanta, I ate fried chicken with biscuits and gravy with a guy from London in Asheville, I sat at the counter in a roadside diner and chatted with the waitress and an older gentleman next to me about how ‘things ain’t how they used to be no more’. I went back to the same diner the next day and the same waitress (also named Alex) asked if I wanted ‘the usual’. From Asheville, I went on a 3-day hike up in the Smokey Mountains and saw a sunset atop Gregory Bald, the awe-striking beauty of which I thought could only exist in Google Images, with all the orange and purple oozing into the clouds and the steam rising from between the slumbering peaks and valleys. I saw 3 members of B.B. King’s band perform in Nashville and, in Memphis, stood in the spot where Elvis Presley first recorded and sat at the piano that he, Johnny Cash, Carl Perkins and Jerry Lee Lewis all crowded round in 1956. That day also happened to be the 4th of July; the rain had washed out the already deserted streets of Downtown Memphis, and I couldn’t foresee watching fireworks in the lashing rain at a place literally named Mud Island being any fun, so I watched the festivities from the balcony of the Airbnb with Aisha and Tom, two other lodgers I had just met who were roadtripping their way to New Orleans. Once satisfied that the last red, white and/or blue firework had burst, we watched ‘The Nightman Cometh’ musical episode of It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia.

On the night I got back I hugged my Mum very tightly and went out to see my friends at the place where all roads lead to: Ringers. I walked there leisurely, like I’d never been gone, not having to even think about where I was going and what were the best roads to take. Ellie was waiting outside for me and like me she’d changed her hair to blonde, then Jess came, then Harvey appeared and sprang straight into the tale of how he got stuck in a door in the London Underground earlier that day, then Joe and Charlie came, then Cop, then Chris. All these faces I knew as well as the route to the pub came round the corner and exchanged grins with mine like a reunion episode of some sitcom that’d been off the air for years, or like that really lame scene at the end of The Lord Of The Rings. The more people who showed up, the more I melted back into the familiar flow or banter and inside jokes, so naturally and so easily, as if the night were a record that someone had taken the needle off of 6 months ago and had just put back down. In the days that followed I caught everyone up on what I had done and where I’d been and who I’d met, and in the weeks that followed I came to feel completely reintegrated into the ordinary Somerset Summer daze, crashing out on Golden Valley field, binge watching some TV show when the rain comes, turning up late for every social outing and crushing cans of cider in the garden of whoever’s been kind enough to offer it.

With every new day, everything feels more normal and Colombia feels a little further away. And as bliss as coming home has been, how much it came at exactly the right time, there are things and people that should be here but aren’t here and which Nailsea could never recreate. I think about my housemates from Bogotá every day. Those thoughts manifest in things as little as songs on the radio that I think they’d like or in grand visions of them bursting through the Spoons doors as part of some massively extravagant and completely-out-of-their-way surprise visit. I went to a rave in Bristol with Dom and I’m going to Norwich this weekend to see George, but as I write I suspect that Stephen and Ela may be wrapping up their extended travels in Bolivia and arriving at their respective homes in Roanoke, Virginia and the British Virgin Islands, so very far away. I realised on a dragging Greyhound journey from Atlanta to Asheville, miles and miles away from anyone I even remotely knew, that from now on, no matter where I go, it’s a certainty that I will be far away from at least one person that I love. This fact is actually a good thing, the slow dispersion of loved ones is a symptom of everyone finding their way and achieving their goals; I accept this, but I am still entitled to a touch of sadness every day when I don’t say ‘good morning’ to my friends in the Gap House and every time I go to bed without saying ‘good night’.

The stars over Nailsea are better than I remember. They splash and scurry across our countryside sky in ways I never saw in the orange, cloudy haze of the Colombian night. Sometimes walking back late from Charlie’s or Jess’, I crane my neck up at them and wish that my friends across the sea, in the States, in Spain, in the BVI, could see them, and then I remember that they probably can, and that’s a nice thought. To borrow some words once spoken by a sleepy, traffic-frustrated Stephen, life is ‘just chugging along’ everywhere, and everyone will keep achieving things and developing themselves and I’ll just be so proud of them all. 

Be proud of what you’ve done so far this year, and if you feel like you haven’t done much then there’s still a lot of time left in it for you to change that.