#i really wish i could have some fun and play sims but i cant really justify that until i finish the week's hw

[finagled]

i will go to bed at a reasonable time tonight so that tomorrow i may grab hold of my destiny firmly with both hands (finish my programming assignment)

[coolgrl111]

HELP SO i dont usually really send asks im sorry if this is awkward lmao i sorta just lurk in the challengers fandom usually 😔😔 but like if you could do some kind of either like blurb or general hcs with art x goth!reader i would love you forever 🫶🫶 i completely get it if you either cant or dont want to^^

- 🦇

okay sorry if this is literally soo bad or tacky but i tried 😭😭😭 i hope u like❤️❤️❤️

bf!art donaldson x goth!reader

- art literally has no idea how he ended up with you but he loves you endlessly. like he’ll just watch you do your thing, especially your makeup. whether that be your black lipstick or sharp thick eyeliner— he watches with so much focus like he’s studying for the most important exam of his life. “jesus baby, how do you get the edges so sharp?”

- he loves your rings. actually cannot stop playing with them. will grab your hand just to spin them around your fingers, fiddle with them. especially if you wear multiple at a time, he loves when you stack them. he once tried to steal one and got it stuck on his bigger fingers. had to google “how to remove a ring without amputation” in a panic. he didn’t try again after that….

- bro does not understand how you carry so much in your bag. “what do you even have in here?” and then you pull out a dark fantasy novel, a half-eaten granola bar, some more dark makeup and a vial of fake blood like it’s normal. he stops asking after that. he’s turned on, however.

- if you go to goth/emo parties, you obviously take him after he begs to accompany you. he walks in wearing his stanford hoodie and a backwards cap, visibly nervous. he just wants to fit in. he craves being accepted. he tries so hard to dance but looks like a malfunctioning sim. you love him for trying, and you make sure he feels comfortable and you introduce him to friends etc etc.

- he LOOVES how protective you get over him. if anyone so much as looks at him wrong, you immediately stepping in. “what the fuck are you looking at?” and he’s all giddy like that photo of zendaya when tom defended her from paparazzi BYEE😭😭

- also the same for you. if anyone’s giving you weird looks he is immediately all over that defending you like a knight. he knows you don’t need that, you’re not a damsel in distress but he can’t help his protective instincts.

- he’s secretly scared of horror movies but won’t admit it. will try to act all unfazed but will literally flinch at everything. and he gets defensive if you suggest to turn it off. “i wasn’t even scared, i just wasn’t expecting it. no don’t turn it off, babe, im not even scared.. it’s more fun to act scared anyway…” yeah ok sure.

- he tries to match your vibe… TRIES!!! once he tried by wearing all black but literally just looks like he’s going to a funeral. like all he had was a button up shirt. in fact he definitely had worn it to a funeral. but you tell him he looks great though because you love him.

- late at night when it’s just you two, he gets all soft and tells you he loves how you don’t care what people think. that he wishes he was like that. you pretend to roll your eyes but secretly you’re blushing so hard. he’s the light of your life. and although you two are an unlikely pair, you’d change nothing about each other and love each other unconditionally <3

[bitchlessdino]

Get to Know Me!

technically tagged by @gyubakeries <3 (tiya ily you're so sweet always)

what's the origin of your blog title? 💘I was originally known as underratedlovedone and wanted a brand change so i did a whole fuckass poll on google forms (pre-tumblr polls btw) and that was so fun. I believe a mutual suggested this name and im sorry but rn their name escapes me. I was almost dildodino....

favorite fandoms: 💘I ult seventeen, that's obvious, got7, and recently yall have seen i've been getting into l0ve and d3ep spac3 (its a fucking problem and I’m not ready to be found yet), but otherwise what else hmmm, I'm a pretty causal listener to most of the rest kpop/krnb. smosh is fun, i love a good laugh, i think half my humor is svt other half from them or smth like that. i get so addicted to things and move on so quicky i'm trying hard to remember rn.

OTP(s)/shipname: 💘These are ship dynamics i absolutely love. Not romantic for obvious reasons. Wonchan, Boochan, Boogyu. it's hard bc i really love group dynamics, like 2+. SVT is so perfect for that actually. and really my ships are usually whatever is my current obsession at the time

favorite color: 💘light blue but specifically, #8AA7CC. it's called polo blue for some reason idk. but this was actually very close to the blue i had for my wedding and its so pretty.

favorite game: 💘I played persona 3:overload for MONTHS, my husband would literally see my gremlin ass at the tv with my controller grinding tf in those dungeons. I'm also a sims enjoyer, l0ve and d3epspac3 again lol, gta6 when it finally fucking comes out gdi rockstar

song stuck in your head: 💘the love and deepspace intro.....its hauntingly beautiful it actually scares me a little. And "if you leave me" by svt is my comfort song rn

weirdest habit/trait? 💘uhhhhh. I pick up on people's speech patterns all the time. Its how i was able to semi-learn some languages or accents. One time i was on a work call with a client that was from Alabama and maybe bc i'm from the south but i started to actually mimic her subconsciously. to this day i hope i didnt offend her or anything. you'll also learn that i'll yap alot reading this. and 'lol' or 'like' and unhealthy amount and i hate that.

hobbies: 💘I write a lot on my own time, i just sometimes don't post it bc its often incomplete or not fully-fledged. I also read, which i need to get back into bc my tbr is long asf. I sing but not as much as i used to. I also cook. sometimes game. Kdramas, anime whatever it’s ongoing at that moment anyways. I enjoy my free time.

if you work, what's your profession? 💘bro when i was working, it was at a bank as a business analyst, sounds impressive, it wasn't. but i miss the steady income

if you could have any job you wish, what would it be? 💘 honest to god, i'd love to go back at tell my younger self to seriously try to get into acting. or film and its production/writing. It wasn't until adulthood that i realized i wanted to work in a creative environment but forgoed for 'realistic careers.' this may be your 4th, 5th, 36th life guys take a chance. there's an AU me out there there that pursued everything I wished for and I wish I was them.

something you're good at: 💘I would also love to know. but i think I'm funny sometimes and a little witty. sometimes i have to stop myself before i say some dumb shit tho, so i spit all that nonsense into my writing.

something you're bad at: 💘most things, especially pushing myself to my full potential. i know i hold myself back a lot. like i keep saying i'll write a book and publish will always have an excuse not to. not deep answer: i cant ride a bike and i refuse to. i just have no balance and i can barely stand straight ngl. and most physical games bc i am feeble i would not survive a zombie apocalypse

something you love: 💘food god i love food. and milk tea or boba tea drinks in general, call me a basic asian idc 💘human interactions but not including me but like people watching, i enjoy seeing a relationship grow and flourish overtime idk such a cute human things. i like to see the humanity in people. 💘the cats in my parents' neighborhood that have made ours and the neighbors across from us lawns pretty much their territory. a whole kitty gang. 💘and days that give me a good reason to put on a cute outfit, and do my hair and makeup. i'm at home a lot so those days are kinda special to me. I'm bare face 98% of the time.

something you could talk about for hours off the cuff: 💘seventeen or in general the 2nd-3rd gen kpop lore, that was my shit. I loved those days with the exception of some things. Oh, and the plots i have going on in my head and the characters i have in mind, building them is so fun to me.

something you hate: 💘 things that don't make sense. ok, i hate on a lot of things and a lot of things don't make sense or they are just an entity they cant help it, but how people let history repeat themselves or events occur knowing fully what's going on. it's just insane. things that don't make sense, i cant help but be frustrated. Also like all of twitter/x and its existence and what it’s brought out in people

something you collect: 💘svt albums but not sm recently, stuffed animals from a couple claw machine places in my area's chinatown, my old peoples meds bc im deteriorating at an accelerated pace, things on my tbr or to watchlist

something you forget: 💘most things like errands, which is why i gotta write in my little iphone notes. where i place my phone bc i don't look where i throw and im screaming for siri in my room to find it. sometimes things i enjoy until i rediscover it one day and that's kinda the best feeling ever like "wow i remember i loved you welcome back"

what's your love language?: 💘word of affirmation and good banter, but not just straight up teasing that gets so old, i want real tension that's just like. "yeah, I thought about you. is that a problem?" OR "So you think I'm hot? "Yeah, but you're still annoying."

favorite movie/show: 💘 I dont know if i have a favorite movie i am always changing my mind about what's good out there, but my favorite show ever is this Kdrama called "Moving" It's beautiful and i loved every side story even the adults like it was so beautifully curated. i still think about it a lot and am waiting for a second season.

favorite food: 💘banh mi, korean fried chicken, and sashimiiiii omg i could just go ham on either one right about now.

favorite animal: 💘cats and dogs <3, basic ass answer but i havent felt super drawn to a specific animal. Maybe a panda bc they're such a mood. ykw a panda they are something else everytime i hear about a report of them

are you musical? 💘I've sang since i could breathe. i vividly remember my younger self getting my parents to call the viet radio so i could sing on there live (this theatric bitch). I was in choir in my teens, and i for a moment learned viola but not so much anymore.

what were you like as a child? 💘annoying no doubt, and so much more carefree than adult me. like she did not give a single fuck and people liked that about her. i miss her.

favorite subject at school? 💘debate! it got me into public speaking and interpretive performance. I really enjoyed growing a voice from learning how to not only build and refute arguments, but it got me to practice my acting chops a little like i wanted to when i was little

least favorite subject? 💘math, unfortunately i was awful and did not pay attention so i kept messing up formulas. that was my fault tho

what's your best character trait? 💘i don't like saying it but my empathy? I've been told that that's how often i respond to most situations and often give people benefit of the doubt. i just never want to assume whatever is going in someone's life bc we really have no fucking clue.

what's your worst character trait? 💘honestly too much of a people pleaser or rule follower sometimes. i let my moral compass rule over most of my decisions and that's not particularly bad but that's how i'm often holding myself back i fear

if you could change any detail of your day right now what would it be? 💘 i should have not eaten that pack of buldak ramen bc that was not good for my stomach. i need a real balanced meal especially after what i was told at my doctor's apt.

if you could travel in time who would you like to meet? 💘idk if i want to change any big part of history, that is not something i could leave on my conscious if it blows up the world, but i'd like to visit my younger self that its okay to mess up and really go for things bc she can be so much more if she tried.

recommend one of your favorite fanfics (spread the love): 💘i reallu want to read more but this one is and always one my mind: between you and me by my bb @haologram. it's just so good like shut up and and put this my man in my mo-

Anyways tagging anyone that wants to play!

[20cm]

hi rookie my beloved have u done/read/watched/played anything interesting lately

CAM MY BELOVED HI!!!

so true.. fun question thank u :] i havent read/watched anything lately unfortunately and aside from doing stuff at work i havent done much either (though i have been showing percy my beloved teenagehood anime natsume yuujinchou. its about choosing to be kind when no one has shown you kindness before. its about letting yourself be cared about. its about different kinds of families and platonic and familial love. its really great i recommend it to anyone honestly its just therapy. cried so many times ∞/10)

BUT i have been hopping between games lately :) namely because my brain cant sit still lately

assassins creed odyssey

set in greece, a fictional telling of the peloponnesian war, honestly really really fun :) i love the AC games and this one having a more RPG angle wasnt popular w/ the dudebros but its popular with ME! i love doomed siblings and fighting fate! what if you were two children doomed by the pythia and one of you was raised by a violent cult into thinking you were a demigod but instead you were a tool, and the other was forced to flee home raise themself into a hero of the people and save greece from this cult.....and then youre faced with your baby sibling who you tried and failed to save decades ago

palia

they dont tell you this but palia is a post-apocalyptic game set a hundreds of thousands of years after humans were killed off by some sort of cataclysmic event and all thats left of us are memories of concrete jungles and wires like veins permanently left behind in the memory discs of sentient robots we created to help us who got left behind. you play as a human who came out of some hibernation, separated by your own past by thousands of years and amnesia, and you befriend the townsfolk and try to make a life :) it just looks like a cute life/farming sim

the outer worlds

soooo fun its like if the fallout sense of humor + post apocalypse capitalist doomerism met the sci-fi fun of the mass effect games. which makes sense because the studio who made the most popular fallout game made this one. youre unfrozen out of hibernation and used as a guinea pig to gather material and information for the mad scientist who freed you, working with very little information but a whole lot of incentive. you accidentally crash land on the guy who was supposed to give you a ride off this planet you were just shucked onto. now youre impersonating him. humanity is spread across a system and capitalism-as-a-religion runs it all.

mass effect 1

ive always been obsessed with ME's fantasy sibling dragon age so im trying the mass effect games out... its a dense sci fi and a little clunky but shes from 2007 and both percy and gabe love these games so im persevering. the story is really fun (its about what constitutes "being alive" and personhood) but i feel like ive barely scratched the surface so far!! currently playing this one as im typing

sims 3

shes my childhood sims game :) sims 4 WISHES she could be sims2/sims3. i play it for mindless fun. my current sim has had a batshit life so far

[oneglass-zinfandel]

MUST READ

About me:

Name: call me Zinfandel<3 or nicknames are fine :D

Sexuality: Bisexual

Gender: Female

Language: I will write in English but it's not my first language

Please feel free to ask me anything you would like to know about me<3

Things i will post on my blog:

I will post when i feel like it.

My blog will be filled with fanfiction, i don't really use Tumblr for anything except reading and something I me ticks to write sometimes so here I am!

I also might post my Sims 4 OCs and rooms, as well as some Yandere Simulator related content.

I might post my Janitor Ai bots as well<3

I wish to become a YouTuber one day so I hope I can start here somehow

Who can and cant interact?

Everyone is welcome. My blog with have suggestive themes. What you view is your own personal thing. I wont JUST write smut so who ever wants can follow me and just avoid smut if they dont like that.I will put a warning always

I wont except anyone who is racist or homophobic, a ped0, transphobic, Zoophiles, Incest feaks or anything of the sort, to my blog.

What i will and will not write

First of all i want to say i will write Smut,Fluff and Angst.

Im the best at simple fluff but i do love myself some smut.Im not the best at angst but i will try.

When it comes to fluff i have no complaints about anything really

TW! For angst i will do darker topics but nothing that has to do with one character leading another or leading the reader to kill them selfs.

When it comes to smut i have things i am comfortable and not comfortable with as all people.i dont care who reads my smut fictions enough to check your age so please dont be afraid to show support or ask for more!

I dont like when people are super strict about minors not interacting with their NSFW work but i get that for some people that is a way of coping or seeking comfort or just cuz they have horomones and have no bitches. Just don't explicitly tell me your age lmao

Smut and non smut related stuff i will and will not write about:

NON smut things i WILL write about:

Trans characters or Trans Reader

Dark topics

Murder

Yandere!character/reader

Masochist!character/reader

Sadist!character/reader

Non smut things i will not write about:

Abuse targeted from one character to another ending in suicide.

NSFW!

Smut things i will write about:

Praise kink

Degrading kink

Heat

Overstimulation

Edgying

Bondage

BDSM

Wax play

Food play

Gangbang

Cum eating

Size kink

Breeding kink

Toys

Clones

Mommy/Daddy/Master/Sir

Rough sex

Dom!Sub!Switch!character/reader

Gagging and or Blowjob

Humiliation

Impact play

Role play

Somnophilia

Voyeurism

Dubcon

Spit

Double penetration

NSFW!

Smut things i will not write about:

Non con

Minor x adult (18yo and 17yo character is fine)

Student x teacher (this ones on thin ice)

Step-cest

Incest

Sex slave

Age play

Electrostimulation

Foot fetish

If you want to know who I will and will not write for please look at this blog I posted via the link:

I will also make Character. ai bots so feel free to send in requests here<3

If you would like to ask about something thats not mentioned here please do ask i will love to listen you and give you an answer<3

I will update this as time goes by and requests get sent

[hanisdaisys]

Every memory reminds me of you.

Paring: Jaeyun!XReader!

Warning : character death + mention of drowning

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“Hey babe ? Are you ready Let’s go to the beach !!”

“Almost jakey, let me just get my swim suit !!”

“Hurry up baby or else the beach will be crowded” he whined

“Promise me you will teach me how to swim?” You yelled since he was in the kitchen

“I’ll see baby, but let’s go the boys are waiting for us!!”

Jake came up behind you softly kissing your shoulder. You were inlove with Sim Jaeyun, your bestfriend, your boyfriend as well as your partner in crime.

_____

“You said your parents have a pool right ? Ahhhh I’m so excited !!!” Jake said before pulling you to the backyard

“Let’s play before eating okay ? MOM DAD WE ARE GOING FOR A SWIM” you yelled alerting your parents that you’ll be swimming with your boyfriend… or well using a floaty since you can’t swim”

“Of course baby !! Your parents won’t mind us swimming right ?” He let out a squeal at the size of the pool, the water looked so clean and cold. Perfect for todays weather .

“Not at all !! Can you teach me how to swim this time Jakey ? I’m getting tired of this swan floaty”

“Mhmm, let’s go Y/N” he ran to the pool without actually listening to you

_______

“Hey baby ? Can we go to the beach today ? The weather is really nice and you finished studying so it’s a great time !!” Jake came from upstairs pulling you hand hoping you’d agree

“Jakey :( you know I have to study a little bit more for my dentistry exam !!” You protested kissing his palm

“Cmon baby :( one time !! I promise I will drive so you can study “ Jake looked like a small puppy, he really wanted to go… how can you say no ?

“Baby I can’t swim remember ?…”you told him as he gave you these soft pouty eyes…

“Oh alright jakey !! let’s go but promise me I can study tomorrow” you couldn’t say no to him

“Of course baby I love you so much”

He ran to you giving you kisses all over, oh man you love this golden retriever so much… he means the world too you.

______

“Hey Jake ? My friends want to go to the beach today… Are you sure you will be fine alone ? I left some food in the fridge for you, call me if ever you need me”

“Of course baby have fun !! I’ll probably be catching up on some sleep.Remember to stay with your friends… you can’t swim angel:(“

“Of course jaeyun,I love you so much,stay safe baby “ you give him a small kiss on his nose as he hugs you… those loving eyes of his, it made you feel like you were his whole world… he was inlove and so were you…..

.

.

.

“Hey y/n don’t go to far…” you friend yelled out

“Y/N CAN YOU HEAR US !!!!” She tried following you but someone held her back

“don’t go, you will end up getting pulled in also.” Her boyfriend told her holding her back

“I CANT LEAVE HER JEREMY, SHES MY FRIEND..COME BACK HERE Y/N” She started crying tears flowed her eyes

“HELP HELP MY FRIEND SOMEONE PLEASE SAVE HER” she attracted all the attention and her boyfriend pulled her back…

“stop yelling !! You’re making everyone stare” he whispered

The lifeguard ran to get his vest. He started running into the water hoping to save you.

But suddenly you couldn’t go back. The waves were pulling you further and further away from shore…. You started to cry, wishing you knew how to swim… You opened your watch barely being able to breath and called Jake…

“Hey baby… what’s wrong, I was sleeping”

- jaeyun I love you I swear… And I didn’t want to leave you like this… I promise you were the only one for me… my drawer beside the bed had my proposal ring for you but I can’t hold back anymore… jaeyun I… love yo-

“ Y/N BABY WHATS WRONG ?!? HELLO BABY”

you fell into the water, your watch close at the impact of the water but you could still hear Jakes whimpers and cries. You couldn’t breath nor swim so you let your body take you where ever it wanted to you. On the other hand jake called the police he wanted you home. He wanted you safe.

The lifeguard ran towards you but it was too late, the water had already filled your lungs… it was too late you were dead. He pulled to shore as your friend cried over you dead body… Jake got there with the cops 30 minutes after. It was too late. He held you face and softly kissed your lips his hands intertwined with your lifeless ones and he held you one last time. “I love you baby and I always will, the universe toke you from me but you will always be mine.”

_____

And the day of your funeral jake couldn’t help but blame himself… if only he taught you how to swim when you asked him… and that’s the reason he became a swimming coach in order to save others… because he was too late to save you.

Your life was robbed but your love will never be robbed. Jake loved you so much, the memories you guys had reminded him how much you loved each other. Even if it was too late he wore his ring everyday reminding himself that he has you in this world. When it would get hard… he would visit you tombstone.. wishing you were there with him instead of beneath him. Little did he know you watched over him everyday and made sure he stayed safe… it would never hurt you for him to find love again but it was his choice. His choice to stay loyal to his partner he lost. He never wanted to be alone, alone in this world without you… but he lived every moment in your name. He will never stop loving you.

“Ours was a great love story that we will continue together some day.”

[crazy-hazy-sims]

.

You know i am very excited with the idea of getting a new laptop even thou it wont happen any time soon and it wont be too advanced it would be way better than what i have currently which is about 10 years old

I am mostly excited about being able to play more games !! For years i was confined to 2 games minecraft and the sims and 8 and 14 bit games i some how last year got hades to work but it crashes alot so i am excited to play all of these games i wished i could for years i am also excited to try out diffrent online activities like streaming (only try it out for fun once i dont have the personality for it lol i just like to try everything once atleast for the fun of it) and maybe try and get back to video editing even if for fun also i will be able to learn how to use blender without my graphics card crashing every 5 seconds.

Also i might be able to try out better art drawing programs and not just be stuck to photoshop all the time!!

I think its gonna help alot with this horrible feeling i feel all the time

Like i am stuck in the past being forced to not experience anything cause i am nit up to date so i felt like i am at retirement age instead of in my 20's and instead of exploring my interests i gave up and did what my parents are doing now which is just try to pass the day mindlessly till its time to go which is a dreadful way to live but i couldn't really do anything els especially with how strict and isolate-ive my parents are of me (i am only allowed to go out of the house twice a month and i cant travel for more than an hour and i cant stay out for more than 4 hours and i have to be back by 5pm wich is ridiculous cause transporting anywhere takes 2 hours atleast but yeah this is not new they do this on purpose )

Anyway yeah i am excited for when that happens 🙌

[ebonysquib]

1, 12, 24, 27 from this?

Dating Sim Asks

1.) Favorite dating sim you ever played?

its so hard to choose just one cuz i love all of the ones ive played and they all have something special and unique to them. i'd have to say sakura wars so long my love is my favorite. its not 100% dating sim but it has dating sim elements and its what introduced me to the dating sim genre

12.) Funniest dating sim you have played?

probably Hatoful Boyfriend if im talking official-y marketed games. in regards to fan made things i'd have to say pacthesis' crack dating sims she used to make. (crack as in like its meant to be silly. pacthesis was an artist on deviantart that made original dating sim games that were very fun and also helped me get more into the genre. i don't think she's active anymore but you could probably find some of her games somewhere on the internet if you are really curious.)

24.) Dating sim(s) you plan to play in the future?

probably that weird disney one?? like where you can date jafar except hes a hot bishounen?? its not released in english yet so i havent been able to play. most dating sims i plan to play in the future are not released into english yet.

27.) Dating sim you wish existed?

honestly i wish a dating sim existed for everything lol. and i cant think of something specific but id like to see things that havent been done before. most dating sims follow specific tropes to a T and that gets boring after awhile so i'd like to see them try something different.

[dxmagedrose]

GET TO KNOW THE BLOGGER!

Tagged by: my lover @hammurabicomplex​ I’m tagging: anyone and everyone who wants to pick this one up! share with the class if you feel like it! tag me in it!!

PRESENTING. RANDOM DEEP DIVE WITH INDIGO-MUN AT 2AM ;

FIRST NAME Good fucking question… It’s (sort-of) currently Dylann! I was Kieran before that, though; it’s still used as one of my first names and I’m not used to Dylann quite yet bc I’ve just started using it. 

Indigo is one of my middle names though, and I’ve used it as an online handle elsewhere forever so I use it here now!  [ Fun etymology facts: Dylan(n) is a mythology name generally meaning “born of the wave” (aspiring diver & a water witch at heart). Kieran means “little dark one” bc of my love for horror, && I chose Indigo bc as a kid to be it was neither boy (blue) or purple (girl) and was both and neither as well as my absolute favorite color as this vibrant ass mystical color. ]

STRANGE FACT ABOUT YOURSELF hmmmmm…. I’m a horror lover at heart, so as a child (I wanna say 12), I was walking through an antique store (I have a few cool finds, I considered putting my other one as the fact tbh) and I turned the corner and I saw these two dolls staring back at me at the foot of the stairs of this antique building. my blood froze, and i felt my stomach drop. i got actual, physical goosebumps stumbling across these two creepy dolls staring back at me in the corner, and i couldn’t leave the store without them. perhaps the little painted porcelain boy would be somewhat spooky by himself if it wasn’t for the terrifying lidded gaze of the porcelain girl with the hairline fractures and slightly open lips. i cant look at her. i dont really find dolls scary, I like to find the spookier ones ones, and she makes me paranoid as hell. i keep her face covered and her up in my closet except for when i bring her out to show her off proudly as the spookiest thing I have but……. i dont really collect dolls anymore.  even thinking about her brings a fearful tear to my eye.  i don’t like to think about her for very long, but that’s why I’m so fucking proud to own her. ( YES — I’m THAT white person in the horror film )

TOP THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU FIND ATTRACTIVE ON A PERSON hhhhh a beardy jawline, high cheekbones, crooked canine teeth >:3c

A FOOD YOU COULD EAT FOREVER AND NOT GET BORED OF b.l.t.’s with avocado. ahhhh. my mouth is watering just thinking about it, oh my god. just a bit of salt and pepper???

A FOOD YOU HATE barbecue anything, i hate the taste of bbq sauce, you keep your nasty black goo to yourselves at the grill. twice in my life i have presented with barbecue pizza and both times i cried literal tears. why would you do such a horrible thing to a person? what kind of a monster are you? how do you sleep at night?!

GUILTY PLEASURE the sims. constantly. always. i’ve sunk thousands of hours into my households. oh also uhhhhhh i run two 80s horror blogs, one being a shitpost blog with occasional art of mine and one gremlin fanfic ship blog for horrible, terrible self indulgent fanfics i’ll get the courage to finish writing & post so i can be cancelled on tumblr for at some point. NO, i won’t link them. as i pretend they’re even all that hard to find, within a day i was found on both by someone i admire here a lot :’) ilu bby thnk u eternally for supporting ur local horrifying dumbass wtf

WHAT DO YOU SLEEP IN the same clothes i’ve been wearing all day usually, my sweats & long sleeve raglans or my hoodies. i like being cozy day & and out. and ugh. efoort. just throw me in a blanket in a cool room and im out.

SERIOUS RELATIONSHIPS OR FLINGS serious relationships with some openness or poly. i wish i could fling! just not exactly easy for demisexual autistics lmao.

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN THE PAST AND CHANGE ONE THING ABOUT YOUR LIFE, WOULD YOU AND WHAT WOULD IT BE I think I would be adopted by my grandma as a kid. It would save me some trauma but mostly I think it would get my autism diagnosed way earlier and save me angsting all these years of wondering why & thinking it’s my fault I’m struggling so much and so loud and affectionate and different in a world that i didnt fit in the same way. 

ARE YOU AN AFFECTIONATE PERSON when i get drunk i text people how much they mean to me in my life. does that answer your question? ahhh. i’m sometimes a cuddle monster with friends, i message people with long texts about how much they mean to me, but I sometimes really don’t like to be touched at all. 

A MOVIE YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN FLYPAPER.  F L Y P A P E R.  FLYPAPER.  FLY, and, I can’t stress this enough, fucking PAPER. ( Though also Whole Nine Yards and both Re-Animator & Bride ). I have watched Flypaper already like, 5 times this week and I’m still not done, and the other movies have been on repeat for days in this household within the last year. In the past it has also been Donnie Darko & the new Nightmare on Elm Street.  roast me.

FAVORITE BOOK White Fang by Jack London. Have I actually ever finished it? No. Do I still own a copy I’ve had since childhood thru multiple dogs eating it, taking it to and from school, and highlighting and circling all the best parts of chapter one ever since I was a kid and it was too hard of a book for me to read? You bet your ass. If I ever need inspiration I just reread chapter 1. Although one of my other favorites was Broken Monsters by Lauren Beukes. But White Fang is like, a weirdly personal text. We stan London’s writing in this household.

YOU HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO KEEP ANY ANIMAL AS A PET, WHAT DO YOU CHOOSE FENNEC FOX!! I used to daydream about having my own named Shiloh when I was a lil kid. they’re adorable little things and i am obsessed. i mean, gimme any fox and im happy, marble foxes, red foxes… but I was obsessed with fennec foxes. Also tbh ferrets. I want a ferret.

TOP FIVE FICTIONAL SHIPS [IF YOU ARE AN RP BLOG, YOU CAN USE YOUR OWN SHIPS AS WELL] Rosa & @ninetyscnds‘s Luke, Rosa & @iimpulsivity is already screaming my name, Rosa & Constantine, Jesse & Andrea from Breaking Bad, and the joker and harley of 80s sci-fi Dan & Herbert from Re-Ani.  I am but a simple opossum. 

PIE OR CAKE Pie! I’ll take both pumpkin & melty apple over cake. also, cheesecake is more pie than cake soooo, pie wins.

FAVORITE SCENT my dogs / my blanket. :’)  It’s the most grounding smell in the world. 

CELEBRITY CRUSH oliver jackson-cohen, i’m fucking GAY and im angry about it. there i was, minding my own business, and i saw that asshole in a certain SHIRTLESS GIF and it AWOKE SOMETHING IN ME. dont talk to me about it, holy shit im obsessed with beardy men now god fuckkdafjaask i hate him why did he make me this gay i was perfectly fine being into girls but NOOOOOO him and his dumb hairy chest and sweet rugged face and I——  I also am obsessed with the archaeologist & television personality Josh Gates and may or may not be considering making a fan blog for him bc idk if my anthropology docuseries host is Dad or Daddy but i love him lots

IF YOU COULD TRAVEL ANYWHERE, WHERE WOULD YOU GO I would go on a dive with anthropologists and archaeologists doing fieldwork research in the ancient cenotes of the Yucatán Peninsula. My actual dream job, catch me crying & fantasizing about being underwater documenting Mayan skulls given as offerings. Fuckkkk, I love anthropology so much!!  take me anywhere in the world to immerse myself into culture & archaeology.

INTROVERT OR EXTROVERT Introvert. I have a real life friend I see roughly once a month, and that’s it. Plenty of online relationships, I’m chatty, message me all day every day. but i dont do people well.

DO YOU SCARE EASILY I used to! Really bad. I don’t as much anymore. I do get paranoia a lot still. Having therapists telling you that the FBI could be outside your house watching you through your windows will kind of nervous. ( no google results for: yes hello fbi i am a writer please dont put me on watchlists i just have research i need to do for this idea im working on, would you like to try again? ) I have nightmares nightly but not they never make me afraid, they just make me feel like crap. jumpscares and loud noises and seeing people reaching into their pockets dont set off as many brain alarms anymore tho!! progress haha.

IPHONE OR ANDROID I like my android better bc of capabilities but meh

DO YOU PLAY ANY VIDEO GAMES My mom, her husband & I play COD for family game night, and Silent Hill is my life’s blood. I’ve sunken hours into Sims & Skyrim, and Norman Jayden from Heavy Rain is my #1 fictional character in existence, why do i love the druggie babies

DREAM JOB Oh… You’re asking me to pick? I’d love to be an anthropologist doing work out in the field. Underwater archaeology is peak, but I’m also heavily considering being a body recovery diver or police diver. I’d love to see myself in uniform someday, if possible. Just the thought makes me teary eyed & proud.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITH A MILLION DOLLARS fund my person creative & educational endeavors. get myself a spooky ass abandoned house to make my own home to create in, and travel to the world’s best dive sites. just live a mild life of education, creation & exploration. that’s the dream TM.

FICTIONAL CHARACTER YOU HATE dr. hill is a gross and whiny lil bitch this post brought to u by the miskatonic crew, how is everyone here an even worse bad guy than herbert west precious dan excluded talk shit get hit tho john winchester from spn and both walter white & todd from breaking bad are all in my crew of hated characters. i jusT…   the reani novel is difficult to read because i have to deal with this old sack of shit.

FANDOM THAT YOU WERE ONCE A PART OF BUT AREN’T ANY LONGER Supernatural :-)

… AND THIS CONCLUDES A DEEP DIVE WITH INDIGO!! //

[endwalkr]

this is an ask based thingy but im really in the mood to infodump so im just gonna answer them all under the cut !

Favorite video game?

starting off with the absolute hardest question huh? i can’t possibly name ONE favorite game of mine because i adore my favorites for many different reasons. my overall favorite video game is ffxv or botw. ffxv because it has brought me so much joy for such a long time, and because i have such a connection with the characters. botw because i was actually in the fandom when it first got announced in 2016 so i got to be there when the hype was at an all time high– and finally being able to play the game after waiting for so long was an unforgettable experience. i have more favorite games but ill talk more about them in the ‘’special place in ur heart’’ question.

First console you owned?

my first console wasn’t a console. my friend and i used to play on her nintendo dsi all the time and at one point tiny little me reeeally wanted one of my own so i saved up and got one in [redacted] when i was 7. my first actual console was a wii though, we got that around the same time.

A game that holds a special place in your heart?

ffxv and botw mean the absolute world to me, but super mario galaxy and skyward sword are very important to me too. skyward sword is the game that got me into zelda which got me into anime which got me into final fantasy etc etc etc.  super mario galaxy was the first non-mini game collection and more adventure story-ish game i played. i was so proud when i beat it for the first time and mario was my first ever ‘’fandom’’ :’) 

Favorite video game character?

bro. i cant pick just one so i’ll choose one per game : prompto, ryuji and link. they were all my comfort characters at some point and i projected like crazy onto them. this doesnt mean that i wouldnt absolutely die for noct or zelda. 

Least favorite video game character?

i dont think theres anyone i distinctly dislike? i always talk about hating ardyn but that’s because he’s just a salty bitch. as a character i think he’s a great villain and i rly love him. i honestly always end up liking everyone somehow, maybe there is someone i just forgot about but i cant remember at all. 

Favorite genre?

adventure games, or action rpgs. 

Video game character you’ve had a crush on?

every character ever, but i distinctly remember the moment i fell in love with prompto sjghfkshd i was watching a playthrough of xv in december 2016 because i didnt have a ps4, and the guy got to the scene in galdin quay where the bros learn insomnia fell. i had watched about 6 hours of the game by that time and wasn’t particularly interested in the characters but not uninterested enough to drop it. i hadnt even gotten a good look at the characters faces yet, so when the camera zoomed in on prompto when he said ‘’might not be save for us here!’’ i noticed he had freckles. oh god. oh fuck. oh my god hes fucking cute. oh my god better watch 30 hours of this game now

First video game you remember playing?

wayyy before i got my own gaming systems, my then-best friend had a gamecube in her attic. i was around 5 or 6 at the time. whenever i was over at her house and we didnt know what to do, she’d sometimes propose to play ���’mario kart’’. important is that we are dutch, and i was a literal child. i thought mario KART meant it was a fucking card game, so i always declined whenever she asked. on one fateful day, i finally gave in and was pleasantly surprised it was in fact not a card game, but a viddy game. so we played mario kart double dash. (…i had never played a video game in my life besides browser flash games and was Very Very bad)

Age you started gaming?

so i played my first video game that i didnt own when i was about 5 or 6. then i got my first supply of games at age 7/8, but i dont really consider that time to be when i started ‘’gaming’’. i’d say that was when i started mario galaxy, so i’ve been playing video games for real (ie. story adventure games with boss battles) for about 6 years now.

Hardest video game you’ve played?

this is gonna sound stupid, but the witcher 3. there’s like 7 difficulties and i played on the EASIEST and still had a hard time, i just couldnt get used to the combat. i had the same problem with assassin’s creed syndicate, but after about 10 hours i actually knew what i was doing, and ive played the witcher longer than that and still am clueless. this is kind of an unpopular opinion but i dont particularly like that game

Video game you’ve spent the most time on?

i guess i am what you’d call a casual gamer; i really like video games but during a normal school week i only game for like 2-6 hours. most of the time i dont play for like 2 weeks if im busy. gaming has kind of taken over my life not because i play so much but because i get so emotionally invested lol i’m currently on summer break and even now im not playing a lot because of exhaustion and executive dysfunction. this derailed slightly but the game i’ve played the most despite my casual gamer status is …. … …. ffxv. surprise, right? the runner up is botw, but xv wins by a landslide. 630+ hours. botw is 350. my main save in ffxv is almost 200 hours i think. damn. i really managed to keep myself entertained with that game… (………i was thinking recently, since the loading screens in xv are so long, how much of this total amount was spent watching screens. i imagine it’s several hours, especially if you fast travel a lot.)

Most embarrassing gaming moment?

many moments in my gaming experience are embarrassing, but a more recent one: i was in xv’s postgame, beating some dungeons on my new save file. i had just finished daurell caverns and hadn’t saved in about 2 hours. (uh oh) i was driving around in the regalia type d and got to the big cliff near lestallum, and remembered someone made a gif of jumping in there so i wanted to try it too. i imagined the game would just put me back on the road, like it does when you crash into something. except it didnt. i got a game over. where was my last save? 2 hours back all the way in hammerhead. yippee.

Scariest video game you’ve played?

i never play horror games, cuz for me games are supposed to be relaxing experiences. no hate towards horror games of course, they just stress me out. the only time ive played horror is when friday the 13th was for free on ps+, and my friends really wanted to play it. (theyre kinda addicted to it now. huh) they had already gotten over the initial fear of having jason chase you, but i was still terrified. i can play the game without getting scared now tho. the horror sound effects just rly freaked me out at first jhsdkghsd

Most memorable gaming moment?

playing breath of the wild for the first time, or beating it for the first time. both experiences were filled to the brim with excitement and nostalgia. seeing botw as a blank slate, a world for you to explore, having no idea where you’re going… that was pretty incredible. now i know every nook and cranny of the map, so i wish i could play it for the first time again. i was so incredibly immersed. beating it was insane. i cried for 30 minutes and the end wasnt even sad, i was just so amazed at the fact that i was really here, playing breath of the wild, it was really real. the fucking main theme in the background (which i cannot for the life of me listen to without crying) didnt help with my emotions sgkdjh

Video game character you wish you could meet in real life?

…………..its prompto again. maybe 2017 me …. was .. kind of a kinnie

PC, Xbox, Playstation, or Nintendo?

i dont care about console wars at all, but i think hardware-wise, pc is the best, because if you have a good pc you can basically do anything. i however do not, so i just play on consoles. ive never particularly liked xbox, so i only play ps4 and nintendo. not the switch though. its kinda petty, but my best friend and i really dont like the switch djghks

Gaming company you’re most loyal to?

none. i used to call myself a nintendo nerd (oh my god…. i m. gonna die) in like 2015 but since the switch came out and since i got a ps4 they kinda lost me. i still like their game series of course, but as a company i don’t care for them. the only reason i see square enix as one of ‘’my’’ gaming companies is because ffxv took up like 70% of my gaming experience, but besides final fantasy i don’t really love them too much either.

If you could only play one video game for the rest of your life, which would you choose?

atm i’m really into ffxiv because theres just so much to do, but that’s just a new, possibly temporary interest. if i had to choose, i’d say botw. maybe i’d say ffxv, but i feel like running around doing nothing in that game isnt very fun, because the world is sorta empty after completing every quest and getting to level 120. in botw, just fucking around on your horse is still really relaxing and nice. 

Do you use strategy guides?

yup. in certain games i try to avoid them but i usually end up stuck or in need of advice. i couldn’t have gotten so many p5 trophies if not for the internet lol

How often do you use cheats?

never, simply because the games i play often do not have cheats. unless im playing the sims and are in need of a motherlode, i dont use them.

Competitive or single player?

single player. im bad at video games and like to do stuff at my own pace. online multiplayer can be fun every now and then in games like mario kart 8 or splatoon, and i also like teamwork stuff like ffxiv or comrades. but ultimately, i prefer playing on my own.

Video game character you want to/have cosplayed?

have never cosplayed, dont have plans to either, but it would be fun to cosplay link. omg. i just remembered i have that fucking chocomoogle shirt… sorry link im gonna slap on some sasuke hair, black jeans and ugly sneakers 

Ever go to a video game convention?

i have not, i have however gone to three (3) video game concerts which is basically the same thing. 

Hardest boss fight you’ve been in?

the hardest bosses for me are usually the ones with a gimmick. you have to use a certain item or tactic to beat them or something. other hard fights for me are when you fight someone with a similar skill set. (in ffxv, this happens twice, once with the iggy-noct sparring match and once against ardyn. somehow, the final boss was easier than getting the prince to eat vegetables.) i don’t know an actual example of THE hardest boss fight ive been in though. at the time, the first bowser battle in mario galaxy was the hardest thing in the universe and i got stuck for like a month. currently, i’m having trouble with the riku-ansem fight in kh1. 

Video game you wish you could burn from your memory?

the zelda cdi games? no, i dont really know. i dont hate a game so much that i’d want to forget about it altogether, but i dont exactly love ocarina of time that much. it hasnt aged well and playing it on the gamecube for the first time in 2015 wasnt a good idea. im sure it was revolutionary at the time, but i cant handle the outdated controls gsdgksjs 

Favorite gaming series?

see, i love ffxv itself more than the entirety of the zelda series, but i dont love ff as a SERIES more than the zelda games. so if were talking series, zelda for sure. i fucking love those games and they mean a lot to me. 

Do you skip tutorials, or find them useful?

i often skip them because i cant pay attention, but then find that i need them anyway. so i usually do skim through them. 

Best online gaming experience?

one really good one happened a few days ago in ffxiv, some guy and i exchanged emotes for like 30 minutes and it ended with us becoming friends on psn :’) ppl dont usually emote back at me in that game so this was really wholesome and nice gjshksdj 

Worst online gaming experience?

i dont really have a worst? theyre more annoying. think try harders in gta online killing you 15 times in a row because they want to show you how good they are or something. magically, online gaming hasnt been too hard on me (mainly because i dont game online that much)

Why do you game?

it brings me joy. it’s a fun way of relaxing, while being stimulated at the same time. games have meant a great deal to me the past 6 years and i wouldnt want to lose them for the world.

[kiwisimie]

𝐆𝐞𝐭 𝐓𝐨 𝐊𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐌𝐞 𝐓𝐚𝐠 !! 

RULES: Post a pic of your simself with your traits and answer the questions!

TRAITS: loner, music lover, clumsy

tagged by: the great @honeybeqr

✩ QUESTIONS 1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME? um just esther is fine 2. WHAT IS YOUR NICKNAME? mum, wife, goldfish, and esti 3. BIRTHDAY? 3rd july 4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BOOK SERIES? um I don’t really read series but princess diaries and dork diaries are pretty fun 5.  DO YOU BELIEVE IN ALIENS OR GHOSTS? honestly idk like I believe in the after life and there kinda has to something out there 6. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE AUTHOR? rainbow rowell 7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE RADIO STATION? I always force my dad to play capital when i’m in his car sooooo I guess its capital (?) 8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLAVOR OF ANYTHING? vanilla and chocolate ( cant go wrong with the classics ) 9. WHAT WORD OR PHRASE WOULD YOU USE OFTEN TO DESCRIBE SOMETHING GREAT OR WONDERFUL? cool, good, um great as you can see my vocabulary isn’t that advanced 10. WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT FAVORITE SONG? japanese denim - Daniel Caesar, closely followed by broke - samm hemshaw 11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE WORD? pueblo, it means village/town in spanish 12. WHAT WAS THE LAST SONG YOU LISTENED TO? i’m listening to the schuyler sisters as I write this 13. WHAT TV SHOW WOULD YOU RECOMMEND FOR EVERYBODY TO WATCH? modern family and the simspons 14. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE TO WATCH WHEN YOU’RE FEELING DOWN? the princess and the frog, it has good songs 15. DO YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES? not really i’m more of a lets play watcher 16. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR? disappointing people and death 17.  WHAT IS YOUR BEST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? i’m very empathetic/sympathetic, I try to see things from the person’s perspective 18. WHAT IS YOUR WORST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? I tend to shut down a lot and just hide away suddenly 19. DO YOU LIKE CATS OR DOGS BETTER? I guess dogs but i’m not really an animal person 20. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? summer for sure 21. ARE YOU IN A RELATIONSHIP? with stress? yes 22. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU MISS FROM YOUR CHILDHOOD? being able to fluently speak french 23. WHO IS YOUR BEST FRIEND? um next 24. WHAT IS YOUR EYE COLOR? dark brown 25. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOR? its really dark brown so it just looks black 26. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU LOVE? my family 27. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU TRUST? once again me family 28. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN? my friends 29. ARE YOU CURRENTLY EXCITED ABOUT/FOR SOMETHING? the half term 30. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST OBSESSION? fanfics, kpop, bullet journals and stationary ( an odd combo of things I know ) 31. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW AS A CHILD? totally spies, les zinzins de l'espace, and ratz 32. WHO OF THE OPPOSITE GENDER CAN YOU TELL ANYTHING TO, IF ANYONE? my brother, he’s a real g 33. ARE YOU SUPERSTITIOUS? not really 34. DO YOU HAVE ANY UNUSUAL PHOBIAS? I cant with butterflies I panic a bit when they fly near me 35. DO YOU PREFER TO BE IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA OR BEHIND IT? I like having the memories when i’m in front of it but I do like being behind it 36. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HOBBY? playing instruments, reading and making sims 37. WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? fangirl by rainbow rowell thoroughly enjoyed it 38. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? the greatest showman I think 39. WHAT MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? piano, some chords on ukulele and guitar, i’ve been taking violin lessons, and I have a clarinet from school that I have yet to play seriously 40. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ANIMAL? any baby animal is my favourite animal 41. WHAT ARE YOUR TOP 5 FAVORITE TUMBLR BLOGS THAT YOU FOLLOW? anyone that posts is amazing 42. WHAT SUPERPOWER DO YOU WISH YOU HAD? teleportation because i’m a lazy bugger 43. WHEN AND WHERE DO YOU FEEL MOST AT PEACE? in bed listening to music or reading 44. WHAT MAKES YOU SMILE? memes that my friends send me and being with people 45. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? I play for my school’s football and netball team and we do loads of different sports during lessons 46. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE DRINK? orange juice 47. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A HAND-WRITTEN LETTER OR NOTE TO SOMEBODY? I wrote little messages in all the Christmas cards I gave out last year 48. ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS? I don’t think so, ooo do I love the feeling when you’re in a plane and your stomach does that thing when it goes down a bit ( I probably sound crazy ) 49. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE? ermmm slow walkers and being late for no reason 50. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO A CONCERT? no :( I really wanted to go to love yourself tour but I couldn’t get a ticket 51. ARE YOU VEGAN/VEGETARIAN? I don’t think I could ever 52. WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE, WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GREW UP? an Olympian, still lowkey want to be one 53. WHAT FICTIONAL WORLD WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE IN?  all of them 54. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU WORRY ABOUT? exams and nearing everything I say and do ( I am a very anxious child ) 55. ARE YOU SCARED OF THE DARK? kinda 56. DO YOU LIKE TO SING? yes but i’m definitely not talented so you’re not hearing that any time soon 57. HAVE YOU EVER SKIPPED SCHOOL? not without informing the school because i’m a good child 58. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PLACE ON THE PLANET? good question 59. WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE? in a city that’s maybe in another country 60. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? no and i’ve never had one 61. ARE YOU MORE OF AN EARLY BIRD OR A NIGHT OWL?  a bit of both I think 62. DO YOU LIKE SUNRISES OR SUNSETS BETTER? sunrise, gotta love golden hour 63. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DRIVE? no as I am underaged 64. DO YOU PREFER EARBUDS OR HEADPHONES? depends on where I am and what i’m doing 65. HAVE YOU EVER HAD BRACES? no but like all of my friends have 66. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC? there is a wide variety 67. WHO IS YOUR HERO? mi madre 68. DO YOU READ COMIC BOOKS? do webtoons and mangas count? 69. WHAT MAKES YOU THE MOST ANGRY? how ignorant someone people are 70. DO YOU PREFER TO READ ON AN ELECTRONIC DEVICE OR WITH A REAL BOOK? definitely real books, I have brought a couple 71. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? music and maths 72. DO YOU HAVE ANY SIBLINGS? yeah I have an older sister, two older brothers and a little sister 73. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? tipp-ex, a clip-on light and a new moisturiser 74. HOW TALL ARE YOU? 169cm whatever that is in inches 75. CAN YOU COOK? only like the basic things 76. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU LOVE? family, friends and clothes 77. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU HATE? CUCUMBERS and AVOCADOS 78. DO YOU HAVE MORE FEMALE FRIENDS OR MORE MALE FRIENDS? my closer friends are basically all female 79. WHAT IS YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION? i’m your everyday heterosexual 80. WHERE DO YOU CURRENTLY LIVE? in the east of england 81. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TEXTED? my mum 82. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? a few days when I went to went to watch the curious incident of the dog in the night-time ( that show was a lot to handle ) 83. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE YOUTUBER? bestdressed I love her personality and her sense of style 84. DO YOU LIKE TO TAKE SELFIES? occasionally 85. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE APP? tumblr, youtube, google keep and huji 86. WHAT IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR PARENT(S) LIKE? we are get along nicely 87. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOREIGN ACCENT? I don’t really have a favourite I find them all pretty entertaining 88. WHAT IS A PLACE THAT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO, BUT YOU WANT TO VISIT? italy 89. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER? 6 and 3 90. CAN YOU JUGGLE? unfortunately I am not that talented 91. ARE YOU RELIGIOUS? yes 92. DO YOU FIND OUTER SPACE OF THE DEEP OCEAN TO BE MORE INTERESTING? we always watch documentaries about the deep ocean in science lessons and that’s always interesting 93. DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF TO BE A DAREDEVIL? hecc no 94. ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO ANYTHING? i’m like 99% i’m not 95. CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE? yes 96. CAN YOU WIGGLE YOUR EARS? when I raise my eyebrows they move 97. HOW OFTEN DO YOU ADMIT THAT YOU WERE WRONG ABOUT SOMETHING? more often then I would like 98. DO YOU PREFER THE FOREST OR THE BEACH? forests 99. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIECE OF ADVICE THAT ANYONE HAS EVER GIVEN YOU? ‘if you mess up no one’s going to notice unless you allow them to notice it’ my music teachers always say that for performances 100. ARE YOU A GOOD LIAR? I think I can be pretty convincing 101. WHAT IS YOUR HOGWARTS HOUSE? Hufflepuff! 102. DO YOU TALK TO YOURSELF? all the time, it helps me sort out my thoughts and explain things to myself 103. ARE YOU AN INTROVERT OR AN EXTROVERT? I am an introvert ( big surprise there ) and my personality type is isfj 104. DO YOU KEEP A JOURNAL/DIARY? yes but i’ve always been inconsistent with it 105. DO YOU BELIEVE IN SECOND CHANCES? yes 106. IF YOU FOUND A WALLET FULL OF MONEY ON THE GROUND, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? give it to some sort of authority ( like a teacher or the police ) 107. DO YOU BELIEVE THAT PEOPLE ARE CAPABLE OF CHANGE? sure 108. ARE YOU TICKLISH? very 109. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A PLANE? yes and I love them 110. DO YOU HAVE ANY PIERCINGS? just my ears 111. WHAT FICTIONAL CHARACTER DO YOU WISH WAS REAL? baz and simon ( that’s two I know ) 112. DO YOU HAVE ANY TATTOOS? no 113. WHAT IS THE BEST DECISION THAT YOU’VE MADE IN YOUR LIFE SO FAR? applying for literally everything 114. DO YOU BELIEVE IN KARMA? not really 115. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES OR CONTACTS? I have glasses and I want contacts for when I do sports 116. DO YOU WANT CHILDREN? at some point in my life, yes 117. WHO IS THE SMARTEST PERSON YOU KNOW? I know a lot of people that are smart in different areas of life 118. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING MEMORY? don’t really want that  on the internet 119. HAVE YOU EVER PULLED AN ALL-NIGHTER?  I always end up falling asleep 120. WHAT COLOR ARE MOST OF YOUR CLOTHES? white, black, a lot of yellow, and red ( I have a lot more colour then I used to ) 121. DO YOU LIKE ADVENTURES? yes 122. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON TV? no but my school has been 123. HOW OLD ARE YOU? 14 124. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE QUOTE? ’ good-night, helen’ the only part of jane eyre I liked 125. DO YOU PREFER SWEET OR SAVORY FOODS? depends on my mood I encourage anyone how wants to do this to go for it :)

[maplestreetsims]

get to know me tag!

so, i came to catfish you all with my updated simself, also i made her with alpha cc bc why not?

I saw @galaxsims did this and i thought it might be fun, so the point of this is to make a simself and answer some q’s so people get to know you better

I’m going to tag anyone who wants to do this, Just go crazy 

   - trash under cut -

1. What is your full name? Constanza

2. What is your nickname? most people call me coti, i had a few friends that called me constance tho

3. Birthday? July 1, 2000

4. What is your favorite book series? i dont read as much as i used to so i dont have one

5. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? aliens yes, ghosts...maybe? just for the spookines of it all tbh

6. Who is your favorite author? i dont read dont come for me

7. What is your favorite radio station? i never listen to the radio, mostly spotify

8. What is your favorite flavor of anything? anything cheese flavored, or like pizza? idk im thinkin chips here

9. What word would you use often to describe something great or wonderful? amazing, cool!

10. What is your current favorite song? literally queens entire discography??? like i saw bohemian rhapsody last week, i liked queen before but now im like on hyperdrive or something

11. What is your favorite word?  chaos

12. What was the last song you listened to? Somebody to love, by (you guessed it) queen

13. What TV show would you recommend for everybody to watch? hmm... i dont know, skam, maybe freaks and geeks

14. What is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down? pride (2014) always makes me feel happy when i watch it, i really like it

15. Do you play video games? yes

16. What is your biggest fear? Ending up alone, but not romantically, more of like no friends, or family

17. What is your best quality, in your opinion? i dont know... i just try to be a good person?? like i put myself in others peoples shoes and treat them how i would like to be treated i guess, bc i know how its like being treated like shit and i wouldnt want that for anyone lol

18. What is your worst quality, in your opinion? my socializing skills? or lack thereof 

19. Do you like cats or dogs better? i like them both the same

20. What is your favorite season? i dont like any season sjdjsdk

21. Are you in a relationship? nope

22. What is something you miss from your childhood? just.. happiness?? not only my own but like everyone in my family (yikes) also my innocence 

23. Who is your best friend? haha ha

24. What is your eye color? brown

25. What is your hair color? Dark brown 

26. Who is someone you love? no one honestly, maybe my pets?

27. Who is someone you trust? literally anyone who is nice to me, that’s bad

28. Who is someone you think about often? my friends, classmates

29. Are you currently excited about/for something? nothing currently

30. What is your biggest obsession? The sims, life is strange and detroit become human.....also queen?, weird combinations

31. What was your favorite TV show as a child? Art attack! also the cocodrile hunter??? that was my shit!!

32. Who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone? I know i just said i trust everyone but like....i dont open up, like ever

33. Are you superstitious? No

34. Do you have any unusual phobias? Elevators?? and cars...are those phobias?

35. Do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? Behind

36. What is your favorite hobby? Editing, playin sims... u know

37. What was the last book you read? I cant remember fghjkljhg probably something for school

38. What was the last movie you watched? Bohemian rhapsody rip

39. What musical instruments do you play, if any? i wish i could play any musical instrument, but i suck tbh

40. What is your favorite animal? cats and dogs™

41. What are your top 5 7 favorite Tumblr blogs that you follow?

@pollinationqueen​ @cosmic-espie​ @omiscanking @bloomlet @gunthermunch @cowberrys and @mellocakes ♥♥

42. What superpower do you wish you had? telekinesis??? um hell yeah why would anyone want anything else

43. When and where do you feel most at peace? this is weird but when im riding the bus home, listening to music

44. What makes you smile? my simblr, youtube videos...

45. What sports do you play, if any? i wish

46. What is your favorite drink? coca cola beech! 

47. When was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody? I dont even remember, but i had to write something like that around this year at least

48. Are you afraid of heights? yes

49. What is your biggest pet peeve? it used to be hearing people chew, but i think im over it

50. Have you ever been to a concert? no, never

51. Are you vegan/vegetarian? No

52. When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? a vet

53. What fictional world would you like to live in? idk sis

54. What is something you worry about? my future, and my life

55. Are you scared of the dark? sometimes

56. Do you like to sing? yes, only when im alone

57. Have you ever skipped school? yeah, but i tried not to, it felt like i was missing out and that kinda made me feel like shit??

58. What is your favorite place on the planet? i dont think i have one, but more like a bunch of them? and only at specific times if that make sense, like the outside of that theater at nightime when i went to see a play with my friends a while ago

59. Where would you like to live? mmm maybe the usa? or anywhere where i could get to speak english all the time

60. Do you have any pets? a cat and a dog, Mercury and Candy!

61. Are you more of an early bird or a night owl? Night owl, def

62. Do you like sunrises or sunsets better? Sunsets, im never up for sunrises anyways, unless i stayed up all night

63. Do you know how to drive? no but i hope that i do at some point, although im scared of cars

64. Do you prefer earbuds or headphones? headphones

65. Have you ever had braces? nope, my teeth are as straight as me

66. What is your favorite genre of music? rock, indie...maybe pop rock?

67. Who is your hero? i dont have one

68. Do you read comic books? not really

69. What makes you the most angry? myself sometimes

70. Do you prefer to read on an electronic device or with a real book? Real book all the way, when i do read that is

71. What was your favorite subject in school? cinematography class???? idk how it translates properly but that was my fave, although the teacher fucking ruined it for all of us tbh

72. Do you have any siblings? nope

73. What was the last thing you bought? a bus ticket

74. How tall are you? 4′9...yikes

75. Can you cook? not at all

76. What are three things that you love? this blog, my family and my pets

77. What are three things that you hate? hooo boy

78. Do you have more female friends or more male friends? i have 0 friends what does that mean? jk i actually would say its pretty equal 

79. What is your sexual orientation? yes

80. Where do you currently live? Uruguay, montevideo

81. Who was the last person you texted? my dad

82. When was the last time you cried? last week

83. Who is your favorite YouTuber? jenna and julien, and probably every sims youtuber(seriously)

84. Do you like to take selfies? not so much

85. What is your favorite app? tumblr, or youtube

86. What is your relationship with your parent(s) like? its alright

87. What is your favorite foreign accent? portugeese

88. What is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit? mmm all of them

89. What is your favorite number? 7

90. Can you juggle? Nop

91. Are you religious? no

92. Do you find outer space or the deep ocean to be more interesting? The ocean

93. Do you consider yourself to be a daredevil? hahah no

94. Are you allergic to anything? i used to be allergic to a bunch of shit when i was a kid but im not allergic to it anymore?? like chocolate, oranges....cats, and dust

95. Can you curl your tongue? Yes

96. Can you wiggle your ears? Yes

97. How often do you admit that you were wrong about something? always hopefully

98. Do you prefer the forest or the beach? Forest

99. What is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you? i dont really ask for advice that often so...idk

100. Are you a good liar? No, but i try

101. What is your Hogwarts House? Hufflepuff

102. Do you talk to yourself? i used to talk to myself all the time, but now i barely do it, thats a good thing right?

103. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Introvert

104. Do you keep a journal/diary? no, i used to when i was a kid but it was pure garbage

105. Do you believe in second chances? Depends

106. If you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do? look for an id to see if i cant turn it in, if not....well

107. Do you believe that people are capable of change? Yes, but only in certain things

108. Are you ticklish? i dont even know, probably not

109. Have you ever been on a plane? no

110. Do you have any piercings? yeah, my ears

111. What fictional character do you wish was real? idk

112. Do you have any tattoos? No, but hopefully i will some day!

113. What is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far? i dont know....

114. Do you believe in karma? yeah

115. Do you wear glasses or contacts? no

116. Do you want children? yeah why not

117. Who is the smartest person you know? honestly i don’t know

118. What is your most embarrassing memory? doing a cindirella theatre play for my school when i was 12, i was cindirella, i dont wanna talk about it njxkcfxf

119. Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? not that i remember, i always end up falling asleep, dosent matter if its like 10 minutes 

120. What color are most of you clothes? green.........i dont even like green

121. Do you like adventures? yeah maybe, depends on what it is

122. Have you ever been on TV? yeah i have actually lmao, it was on a kids tv show 

123. How old are you? 18

124. What is your favorite quote? “We don’t make mistakes, just happy little accidents” 

125. Do you prefer sweet or savory foods? savory!!

[tumblunni]

Make me play awful games!~

A cool idea to both provide you some laughs and help me pay off my broadband debt! If tumblr bloggers can get paid to eat a crayon then maybe i can sell my pain at playing awful video games?

Request me the worst, just goddamn trashiest games you can even imagine!

The consoles i'm able to record on are pc, ps4, 3ds, ds, gba, ps1, ps2 and any android game that can run on a european phone. (I'm still so mad that Dragalia Lost is america only!!)

And yes i will do ALL kinds of awful games! Low funds means i dont have any objection to Suffering Online, yknow? But i mean even if its torturously bad itd be less awful than it usually would, cos i'd be able to laugh about it with my friends!

Games i will otherwise NEVER play on my channel, but will play for money: horror games (cos im a huge wimp), anything with n/s/f/w content (cos i'm asexual AF lol), really extreme gore or something, really really fuckin awful bigoted depressing trash i.e racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, lo/lic/on, abusive relationships/consent issues/homophobia/all the common bad stuff in dating sims that i'm always vigilant for because this genre has such a weirdly high proportion of trash. ALSO: platformers and shooter games. Not because they morally disgust me but because i have shaky hands and poor spatial awareness while i have my glasses on, so i fail sooooo bad, lol! It could be fun to watch!

Only rule is that you need to give me a vague idea of what kind of bad is gonna be in the game, so i can at least mentally prepare myself. Yknow, not film the SUPER bad ones on a day when i'm already depressed? It doesnt have to be a big explanation cos avoiding spoilers would make my reactions more funny lol. But just like i dunno "it has some abusive relationships somewhere" or whatever.

Also, i think maybe prices depend on the Suffering? Like if you request a game that's just Bad aka glitchy or awfully written, then i might do that for free cos it'd be fun, yknow? But stuff with heavy sex/gore or really dark personally offending content would be a "no i'm sorry i'm not doing that without getting paid".

I dunno how much people usually charge for this sort of thing but i was pretty much thinking "throw me £1 and i will be your dancing monkey, i am just that desperate". And a fiver to make me suffer the worst of the worst, lol! Tho of course thats for free to play games or stuff i can emulate, itd kinda ruin the whole purpose if i was losing my own money in the process. Tho i think after my financial dilemma is over i might keep doing this as a "if you can pay at least half the cost of me buying the game, i will play it for you" thing.

Also everybody who's previously donated to help me with my bills, you get free requests for life! Even the maximum suffering!! After all, i'm only making this post cos i felt so bad that people were kind enough to give me money for nothing. I cant think of anything else i can give you guys that would really earn it, yknow?

Oh and just to add that i do already have one or two ideas i could do for this. There's a legendarily awfully disgusting l/olico/n game i got once in a steam sale due to the goddamn game description NOT SAYING ANYTHING ABOUT HAVING HORRIBLE CHILD NUDITY IN IT! I got fuckin jumpscared by lil girl panties!! And the worst part is that the game actually had really good gameplay?? I was enjoying it for like an hour before The Thing Happened, and my eternal rage will never cease because i hate thinking that a good budget went into this grossness. I wish i could steal all of its ideas and make them wholesome!! Srsly i really like "raising a daughter sim" type games and theyre so rare that i was excited to find one that looked decent and then ABORT ABORT ITS ABOUT RAISING A CHILD SEX SLAVE! So yeah i'd love an excuse to basically rant for three hours about how much this thing traumatized me and how awful the developers are. Also i originally noped out at just the first sign of horrible perviness so you guys can laugh at me dying at the no doubt even worse stuff that is probably there!

Also i'm sure this goes without saying but i'll be covering all the horrible sex stuff with censor bars. I don't wanna get kicked off youtube and i dont want you guys to feel the full awfulness of that game, just to enjoy my reactions to that awfulness. Also DUH i dont want any actual pedos to get off on it and follow my channel thinking they'd see more, that'd completely destroy my will to live...

I probably wont censor out other kinds of bad stuff tho? Maybe gore? Does youtube have a rule against gore? I just wanna play it safe. I wanna give you guys the fun of seeing me Die Inside instead of making you also Die.

[wildfangz]

@liliithvatore tagged me in that simself thing thats been goin around DAYS ago but here it finally is! also thank you for the tag this was fun :-]

I tag @slythersim @thelurgoyf @seoulchii @weicyn @solitasims @daisydezem @raha-plays-the-sims if they want to do it & anyone that just wants to do it in general! message me and I’ll even @ u directly if u want. 

anyway lets DO THIS shitload of questions under the cut u’ve been warned!!!

1. what is your name?

julian

2. what is your nickname?

jewel, jules

3. birthday?

oct 26th

4. what is your favorite book series?

percy jackson and the olympians will probably always own my heart & soul

5. do you believe in aliens or ghosts?

yes & yes. tho i do think a lot of alien sightings and conspiracy theories and what not are bullshit

6. who is your favorite author?

maggie stiefvater probably? also cornelia funke but its been years since ive read anything by her so i cant be sure BUT i loved inkheart & the thief lord so much

7. what is your favorite radio station?

ummm when i listen to the radio at all i kinda just switch between two rock stations and our popular music station.

8. what is your favorite flavor of anything?

blue raspberry !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tasty and i love a blue tongue

9. what word would you use often to describe something great or wonderful?

cool. or bitchin’.  i play it simple

10. what is your current favorite song?

hands like houses - revive

11. what is your favorite word?

roulette and inhibition which i never get to use either as much as i want !

12. what was the last song you listened to?

emarosa - givin’ up ! its a bop!

13. what tv show would you recommend for everybody to watch?

the new she-ra on netflix its so good. and gay

14. what is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down?

moana. its also like the only movie i dont have trouble getting thru despite how many times ive already seen it

15. do you play video games?

16. what is your biggest fear?

idk... being inherently unlovable i guess n ending up alone? also spiders !

17. what is your best quality, in your opinion?

im fairly open-minded and laid back. Unless someones being like, purposely nasty or something I generally don’t get defensive or aggressive. also a lot of little quirks that piss others off dont bother me im very u do u as long as its not actually harming anyone and ive had people tell me this makes it easier to open up to me so thats probably my best quality....

18. what is your worst quality, in your opinion?

....at the same time though i do get very sensitive when faced w/ criticism even if its of the fair variety when its not phrased really gently for various reasons and i dont like that. especially since I have a tendency to not even talk to people about it. I’ll just immediately start distancing myself. also other than that i think overall I have a really high tolerance lvl but if you cross that line I hold a grudge like a motherfucker

9. do you like cats or dogs better?

cats! dogs are good too but cats are a lot easier for me to handle...and quieter generally but even when they’re loud cat sounds dont get to me quite as much as barks do

20. what is your favorite season?

autumn but im starting to really like summer for some reason? wack :/

21. are you in a relationship?

nope

22. what is something you miss from your childhood?

the lack of responsibility, probably. that sounds real bad lmao but for me its like...I know I’ve grown in various ways over the years but I also feel like so many of my experiences, my trauma, my mental health has held me back and I don’t think I’m mentally where I should be for my age. so all the responsibility of adulthood is just..really overwhelming for me sometimes, even though ive been given a pass from certain aspects of it and the rest is pretty simple its the idea!!!!

23. who is your best friend?

my ex

24. what is your eye color?

25. what is your hair color?

26. who is someone you love?

my mom

27. who is someone you trust?

not really anyone rn unfortunately...would like 2 work on that

28. who is someone you think about often?

are my OCs a fair answer because i am always thinking about my babies.....

29. are you currently excited about/for something?

my favorite webcomic (that also has two of my all time favorite characters in it) just came back!! the artist disappeared back in 2015 like the day after I binge-read the whole fucking thing & i was so disappointed but its BACK and 2018 has been redeemed

30. what is your biggest obsession?

sims probably! i could talk about anything relating to it for hours

31. what was your favorite tv show as a child?

there were so damn many its hard to even think and figure out the most notable ones...i really, really liked teen titans though?

32. who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone?

my ex, again

33. are you superstitious?

not terribly so but somewhat. I take certain things as signs and I mean I do believe in astrology & such to a degree

34. do you have any unusual phobias?

i used to be afraid of mirrors but thats all i can think of and its not even a thing anymore...the only other thing is tornadoes but i dont think its unusual. but it definitely sucks for me ‘cause i live in tornado alley!

35. do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it?

behind it....like taking pretty pictures and dont like ppl capturing my image 2 film

36. what is your favorite hobby?

sims.....also singing!!! and drawing!!!! video editing!!!!!!!!! the works

37. what was the last book you read?

The Dream Thieves....havent finished it though because last time i went to read it a spider was lying in wait and im traumatized

38. what was the last movie you watched?

coco i think???

39. what musical instruments do you play, if any?

drums, various other percussion instruments, and violin mainly

40. what is your favorite animal?

ferrets!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

41. what are your top 5 favorite tumblr blogs that you follow?

uhhhhh @bratsims @liliithvatore @cabsim @wildlyminiaturesandwich @keysims pls dont feel bad if i didnt include u these were just the first to pop into my head and ive been following some of them since I first made my blog!! and have kept up with their stories completely and enjoy them etc check them OUT !

42. what superpower do you wish you had?

shapeshifting!!! dysphoria? gone. ugliness? gone. want to morph into a fucked up clown and scare people when they realize all the classic clown features are a real actual part of my face? possible!

43. when and where do you feel most at peace?

chillin’ at the pool in summer during the part of the day when no ones there.... swimming is always relaxing 2 me then i love just resting under the sun and drying off afterwards especially since we have a little pond nearby and i can hear the water! its nice

44. what makes you smile?

always and without fail? interacting with anyone i have a crush on. i’ll look like a dope the whole time

45. what sports do you play, if any?

i used 2 play basketball a lot. Like not seriously but it was a thing

46. what is your favorite drink?

dr pepper and monster energy (original flavor) pumps through my veins at this point. we love a carbonated beverage

47. when was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody?

two years ago for my ex and I’s first year anniversary... I never got it mailed but I did at least take a picture of it (with included caption because my handwriting is atrocious). i was very up front about being a romantic and see heres the PROOF

48. are you afraid of heights?

nope! very excited by them actually

49. what is your biggest pet peeve?

i cant stand passive aggressive behavior. my stance is either get over it or quit acting like a bitch because otherwise im just going to ignore you thats the scorpio way (in all seriousness I really, really do recommend not putting up with it and ignoring it until they decide to be up front with you. it can be exhausting constantly reading into conversations and its not healthy for you or them. if they have something to say they need to learn to talk about it properly, and that lack of social skills is not ever on you)

50. have you ever been to a concert?

yep! i think about....six or so? i love them...which is really funny im autistic and EVERYTHING about them should freak me out and they do in other circumstances but at a show i just live for it

51. are you vegan/vegetarian?

nope! ive thought before id like to go vegetarian...but i couldnt do it with my health problems. also i love shrimp too much

52. when you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up?

ive always wanted to do something creative! when i was rlly young I thought a lot about singing and acting and writing in particular...all things im still interested in.... also i wanted to be a dictator ages 4-7 because i told my mom i wanted to be president of the world and make people do what i say and she said “honey thats a dictator not a president”. i then made that known at school and that turned into a situation!

53. what fictional world would you like to live in?

pokemon universe or bust. 

54. what is something you worry about?

never being able to do things i want to do or catching up with others because of my disabilities

55. are you scared of the dark?

yes but a reasonable amount i think

56. do you like to sing?

yes :]

57. have you ever skipped school?

yes i used to play sick a LOT and as my parents caught onto it id even go all out to convince them. i was good at school but i hated it so much

58. what is your favorite place on the planet?

dunno! malls maybe i love shopping and looking at material objects i wish to own

59. where would you like to live?

oregon! portland in particular thats been my dream for a few years now

60. do you have any pets?

a cat! he lives with my dad & grandma though...hes grown up there and likes going outside so I felt bad about taking him with me when i moved out but anyway this is him hes fat and stupid and i love him his name is coffee

61. are you more of an early bird or a night owl?

night owl because my rhythm is all fucked up but in my heart....an early bird...if i get a good nights sleep i’ll be up early yacking your ear off and so excited for the day

62. do you like sunrises or sunsets better?

sunsets are prettier...but sunrises feel more refreshing

63. do you know how to drive?

nope ! im gay !

64. do you prefer earbuds or headphones?

headphones. better sound quality also discourages people from talking to me slightly more

65. have you ever had braces?

nope! but i need them

66. what is your favorite genre of music?

post-hardcore maybe?

67. who is your hero?

every trans person living their truth and being open and loud about who they are past present & future. the worlds not particularly kind to us and our existence alone is considered a radical act, so its always given me hope to see others refusing to pretend to be someone they’re not in this environment and I’ll always have mad respect for that

68. do you read comic books?

i read manga and webcomics...ive always wanted to get into superhero comics but the amount of issues and different versions is ridiculous and makes it inaccessible 2 me 

69. what makes you the most angry?

i mean its hard to pinpoint what makes me angry the MOST...but a contender is definitely how some people feel free to treat others with cruelty and think its their god given right to deny or attack someones existence in some way, & how acts of kindness, even the most basic are branded as liberal bullshit or whatever....it goes against everything i was taught growing up

70. do you prefer to read on an electronic device or with a real book?

real book! electronic device can be easier but....rough on the eyes after a while and nothing beats the real thing for me

71. what was your favorite subject in school?

language arts...at least when we did creative writing stuff

72. do you have any siblings?

two older sisters & an older brother that passed away years ago but. still my brother u kno

73. what was the last thing you bought?

mocha frappe baby!!!!!

74. how tall are you?

5′4″

75. can you cook?

a little bit....not as much as id like to though but im learning

76. what are three things that you love?

storms, cheesy breadsticks, and cat purrs

77. what are three things that you hate?

unnecessary rudeness, being talked down to or generally treated like im stupid, grapefruit which is the worst thing on this list

78. do you have more female friends or more male friends?

female i think?

79. what is your sexual orientation?

im the big bad promiscuous bisexual your parents warned you about

80. where do you currently live?

oklahoma. gofundme campaign to get me out

81. who was the last person you texted?

my friend jojo! just Now!

82. when was the last time you cried?

yesterday afternoon but im a changed man now thats behind me. i will cry about different things soon

83. who is your favorite youtuber?

the mcelroy brothers. also super best friends play. matt, pat & woolie are all great tbh

84. do you like to take selfies?

depends on whether i feel ugly or terribly dysphoric that day or not

85. what is your favorite app?

ummmm....love live school idol festival ive been playin for years its an addiction

86. what is your relationship with your parent(s) like?

dad = bad mom = okay. theres some issues that strain it but its not too bad

87. what is your favorite foreign accent?

i have no idea what the fuck australians are talking about half the time but i dig it anyway 

88. what is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit?

Italy, Greece, Germany, Japan, Mexico, various other states (ive only been out of state three times. twice to texas and then once to kansas. for five minutes)

89. what is your favorite number?

6!! 26 also

90. can you juggle?

ive always wanted to but alas.... :-[

91. are you religious?

i suppose...but im rlly not into organized religion

92. do you find outer space of the deep ocean to be more interesting?

space probably theres so fucking much of it man!

93. do you consider yourself to be a daredevil?

not to brag but sometimes i eat my mcdonalds hamburgers cold from the fridge so you can figure that one out yourself B)

94. are you allergic to anything?

pecans. not deathly allergic though so catch me eating turtle pie anyway! 

95. can you curl your tongue?

nope :[

96. can you wiggle your ears?

nope :[

97. how often do you admit that you were wrong about something?

usually as soon as i realize....unless someones being real smug and annoying then i might be stubborn about it

98. do you prefer the forest or the beach?

ive never been to the beach but i love her!!!

99. what is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you?

probably that you have to look at your accomplishments differently when you’re disabled or just struggling, to not be so down on yourself because its a fact that what might be a mole hill to someone else is a mountain to you and you have to judge yourself accordingly. Like maybe you weren’t able to clean the whole house, but washing the dishes and tidying your desk doesn’t usually get done but you did it. That that should be celebrated because while it would also feel good if you did more, you still did something and thats great all things considered.

100. are you a good liar?

sometimes, really depends what im lying about and if im like....into it at all. If my guts against it for whatever reason I’ll have trouble

101. what is your hogwarts house?

i always get slytherin or hufflepuff! usually with like 1 point difference

102. do you talk to yourself?

i am talking to myself right now as i fill this out

103. are you an introvert or an extrovert?

extrovert mainly! i used to think i was more introverted but now i think a lot of exhaustion when theres any comes from me just going the extra mile and actively trying to read people and pick up on social ques.... if I just chill im fine

104. do you keep a journal/diary?

nope...ive tried but i just cant keep up with it so i do the next best thing. shouting into the void on the internet to a bunch of strangers

105. do you believe in second chances?

depends on what you did the first time. Some people just don’t deserve taking that risk imo...but i can be a little guarded so maybe thats a bit too harsh

106. if you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do?

turn it in, unless there was no identifying things in it & it was found somewhere kinda random. Then I’d maybe hold onto it unless my gut challenged that

107. do you believe that people are capable of change?

absolutely. i mean thats all we do throughout our lives is change and evolve...that being said I think extremely drastic changes are maybe not entirely impossible, but extremely rare, and the residue of the former self usually sticks around in some form

108. are you ticklish?

yes, dangerously so

109. have you ever been on a plane?

nope

110. do you have any piercings?

one day hopefully!

111. what fictional character do you wish was real?

asra from the arcana.....even if he wasn’t my boyfriend thats just a dude u could chill and eat some pomegranates with u know. Before I downloaded the app my friends kept telling me he was made for me and he really was he ticks like everything on my Favorite Characters Feature List except villain but he has that particular allure & attitude i like so much in villains so thats not a single point off hes perfect

112. do you have any tattoos?

nope...one day! hopefully!

113. what is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far?

accepting my genderqueerness and bisexuality definitely. Self Love hasn’t been perfected just yet but that was such a huge step in the right direction

114. do you believe in karma?

yes! she doesn’t get shit done as much as id like however

115. do you wear glasses or contacts?

glasses. not contacts yet because my eye doctor is a bitch

116. do you want children?

I do....just not sure if id be a good parent. Its really important to me if I had a child itd be for the right reason and I could raise them well in a healthy environment & be able to take care of all their needs yknow

117. who is the smartest person you know?

probably my friend jojo

118. what is your most embarrassing memory?

one time i looked outside and the sunset was really pretty and i wanted to get a photo of it so i walked out.....and stood like right by the street so there weren’t trees in my way...and then i realized mid-pic 1) i am not wearing pants & my shirt is full of holes 2) id been depressed for days so my hair was a tangled mess. I tailed it back inside so i didnt even get a nice pic it was blurry!

119. have you ever pulled an all-nighter?

120. what colour are most of you clothes?

black i didnt even have to think about that one

121. do you like adventures?

they are pretty swell

122. have you ever been on tv?

a few times when i was little. always photobombing the news reporters 4 what i thought would eventually lead 2 fame & fortune

123. how old are you?

21

124. what is your favorite movie quote?

this is technically lyrics to that lil song in moana at the end but

“ They have stolen the heart from inside you. But this does not define you.”

hits me hard every time! emotional impact? i know her

125. sweet or savory?

sweet!!!!!!!! gotta balance out my bitter somehow

[somnilogical]

petty bitch

[22:58] somni: this body is really pretty 2 me rn [23:14] somni: that lasted 16 minutes [23:59] somni: okay this is super petty but im kind of annoyed that porpentine

>talks big about the experience of being ugly and gross >has a fleshform thats amazingly pretty

i feel so betrayed??? (i dont actually feel betrayed, i just feel i want to be pretty)

i wanna be pretty so bad

i wish i could stop wanting to look pretty and okay

ill probably end up having an abstract n dimensional figure if i have a form. idk if id still use a vision analogue in simspace

liike non-passing -> passing as 10000-dimensional representation of parts of my psyche

i kind of wish i could look nice in the middle(edited) 24 March 2018 [00:00] somni: kind of sad but at least i look better than i did before hormones [00:42] somni: okay

i think ill acknowledge petty and hug her but not let her front because letting things front makes them stronger? [00:43] somni: i think. ive read this no strong experience corroborating it with 2 sec of thought [00:45] SmolDuck: I think uhhh It’s important to try to like make sure all your subagents have their needs met and letting them front can lead to them taking care of their needs and then going to bed and leaving you be, while keeping them from fronting can lead to them going crazy and driving you nuts [00:45] SmolDuck: it can also lead to them sabotaging things tho so [00:47] somni: i knoooow mertl i originally wrote ‘fork’ [00:47] somni: because i also thought that and wasnt sure!! [00:48] somni: this is actually a hard choice for me,!,! [00:48] somni: but specifically petty i will ask her what is up [00:48] SmolDuck: sounds like you might want to gather experimental data by trying each path and seeing how it goes [00:48] somni: and not go autobloodlet [00:49] somni: hmmmmmm its haaard to be systemic about this thouuuugh thats a cached thought and may be #invalid [00:50] somni: (all thoughts are valid ooohh bb im so sorry for saying that omg. what was i thinking) [00:51] somni: i think the cached thought might be inaccurate [00:52] SmolDuck: nodnod [00:52] SmolDuck: outdated [00:52] SmolDuck: obsolete [00:53] somni: i want to try reinforcing things that i want to be stronger hmmmmmmmm [00:53] somni: merrr and talk privately with the other voices?

that would annoy me if people did that tho [00:54] somni: less so if they listened and changed policies based on my input? [00:55] somni: idk i dont like to declare things conserved quantities, because particular kind of zero sum thinking can cause lock in…. in most people i dont think it would lock me in because im actually good at noticing this

but it does seem like these two things trade off(edited) [00:56] SmolDuck: Hmmmmm [00:57] SmolDuck: Gentle reminder that this is not at all a private location for talking to your voices [00:59] somni: this is true [01:00] somni: the voices are #screaming tho and i gotta process

so like i thiiink that i want to be able to shift between these states depending on a thing but i d k what the thing is [01:01] SmolDuck: External cue? [01:02] somni: like between the states of letting everymodule out and trying to reinforce what ecosystem i want to have (who i want to beee) [01:03] somni: im keeping this post https://radimentary.wordpress.com/2018/01/16/the-solitaire-principle-game-theory-for-one/ in the back of my mind as a guiding framework when i say this(edited) [01:05] somni: and have been thinking of incentivizing and reinforcing parts of me i want (different but not disjoint from what i find pretty) [01:10] somni: i was also thinking of the process by which i passively gain most of my updates in personality traits and aesthetics and beliefs

where you have:

evaluate {laugh, aesthetic response, ooh i like it!} inspect for coherence with other parts (okay i often skip over this but also sometimes do it here instead of later) mirror the thing i like reinforce pattern by imitating independently let other people who have the pattern do discernment on your imitation, take criticism [01:11] somni: –

its like getting minor updates on all your programs nbd. passive growth / expansion [01:13] somni: –

but this is like directed towards growth and change which is different from being okay with and acknowledging the parts you currently have… except its not?

not really? not the way i do it

i mean yes its a different process but i d k if the two actually trade off in me when i do this thing

i was. autocompleting from memories of others subjective experience reports [01:13] somni: hmmmmmmmm [01:15] somni: i could probably both accept parts of me while reinforcing other parts at the same time [01:15] somni: meeevvvvvvvv okay so the thing nathan said is also a good observation that we also noted [01:15] somni: wanna address that [01:16] SmolDuck: wait which thing [01:16] SmolDuck: I say a lot of things [01:16] SmolDuck: fully half of them are framed to sound insightful but are actually kind of bullshit [01:16] somni: I think uhhh It’s important to try to like make sure all your subagents have their needs met and letting them front can lead to them taking care of their needs and then going to bed and leaving you be, while keeping them from fronting can lead to them going crazy and driving you nuts [01:16] SmolDuck: oh, yeah that one I endorse [01:16] somni: me too! [01:16] somni: i think!! [01:17] SmolDuck: ……uh [01:17] SmolDuck: if you did disagree, what would your disagreement be? is maybe a good way to find out [01:18] somni: let me think

ummm i might want to ask the subagent what its going to do [01:18] somni: if it fronts and talk with it [01:20] somni: but idk why do the council of elders have to be in concordance before i do anything

they dont thats literally not how you work

but i mean like in the ideal, or like in this ideal

we talked with person about how we have the council of all the parts of you, they talk it out and give their cases and then if their cases dont agree with you, you throw them out and do what you wanna do(edited) [01:21] somni: um! ！！ [01:21] somni: there are like three different alerts saying that’s wrong [01:22] somni: >yeah but one of them is our sim of nathan’s reaction so we can throw it out [01:22] SmolDuck: I endorse that [01:23] SmolDuck: if you want my reaction I can give it to you directly [01:23] SmolDuck: if you don’t want my reaction, toss your simmed version [01:23] somni: omg okay i miiight endorse this way of choosing

it is consonant with the way of choosing where to live where you have a bunch of spreadsheets and crunch the numbers and if in the end you dont like what the numbers say, throw them out and move where you wanna [01:24] somni: but its important to deliberate first because figuring out what choice you want to make is not always clear [01:26] somni: but also sidenote most choices branch out and then converge to roughly the same endpoint and for these you can actually do whatever you want without consideration as long as you can identify this sort of structure well [01:29] somni: um this is related to impulsive longsightedness where you mentally model the state of your body 1 day in the future and see that you are more or less safe invariant over a wide range of actions. so you are free to do fun and weird stuff. (that often looks really impulsive and reckless to people who are running shortsighted or people running 24hr!longsighted but who occupy a different epistemic state. but ime most of the objections and autoresponses come from people running shortsighted.)(edited) [01:32] somni: –

ooookaaay coming back to… what was the thing before the branch?

how to choose!

you have a bunch of voices in your head! how do we determine how fronting works and whats a good idea and how to pursue goals

and whose goals matter and how the system will grow and change and what parts of it to practice

okay stating it right here, evermodule’s goals matter [01:32] somni: >matter

like every module gets to be heard [01:50] somni: hmmmmm

this looks like a Project

okay!

so i want to be able to direct my growth #VALID

i also want to be able to tend to the parts of me [like id tend to a garden] #VALID

i dont have to maintain and reinforce things i dont want to grow in to #VALID what?! how is this valid??

>so look if i grow into new things and go in new directions, old things that are depricaded kind of iwhrvissh… i want to say fade away but idk what happens. they stop existing as much. stop being as available and salient?

i think there’s an important distinction between actively going around optimizing for killing parts of you. and like growing outwards into something new and the old stuff doesnt get that much reinforcement anymore because you cant hold on to everything, and even of i could i don’t want to?

some old parts are depricaded because they are clearly inferior on all fronts from their replacement, some because im not that interested anymore

maybe this is deathism? (mer what is it doing that causes harm though?) i may want to keep more in the gtf but not everything. though rn i want a memory with no non-con deletions [02:01] somni: -

okay

i want to be able to reinforce stuff i like and grow  directedly

um does this mean things that want to cant go out to play sometimes?

wait okay i think we are talking about different things because there are a lot of desires and stuff that you cant make die by not feeding them? the will to masturbate under t being one of them

i feel there’s a distinction between the thing you are talking about and other sorts of values and desires that are embedded in people.

um im addressing both the hard to get rid of and the more ephemeral things like 'hi im workethic bot!’…. my work ethic, when i have it does not sound like that but okay. and also 'work ethic’ isnt a native concept??? it isnt part of us yet but i know it as a thing that is part of other people.

maybe its part of us but havent really processed what 'work ethic’ is in internal terms when people use it. i think we have something different than the median meaning of work ethic but also it could be projected down to 'work ethic’ for legibility and people would still be able to follow most sentences i would output with the concept. …. given that i also worked to make the other stuff 'legible’. i hate the word 'legible’ now!!!

>why tho?

it is overused and i feel like you papered over subtleties there and there are more good details. buuuut ill think about this later. [02:07] somni: -

okay!

back to what i was thinking about. i think that

>i

k, lotsa agents up in this skull

stilll we think directed growth is nice and i think im okay with letting parts be deprecated

so a core problem here is that fronting does more than one thing!!!

so far im tracking two things i think fronting does:

(1) lets a module take full control of the body so it can get its needs met (2) reinforces the strength of the module [02:08] somni: -

autoquestion: (can we seperate these things?) are there other ways to let a module get its needs met besides fronting? are there ways to reinforce the strength of modules without fronting?(edited) [02:11] somni: @SmolDuck also im on 20 mg moda which i think accounts for a bit of why im Like This. but ooh! what do you think about the separability of the things? [02:14] SmolDuck: Hmmmmm [02:14] somni: ill take some l theanine to help CALM and help the comedown process go smoothly

(i think im coming down a bit) (im p sure this is moda comedown qualia) [02:15] SmolDuck: It depends on the need [02:15] SmolDuck: Seraph does better the less they front, currently [02:15] SmolDuck: the little one needs gentleness and respect [02:16] somni: nodnod [02:17] SmolDuck: if their need is like, 'attention’ they might need to front to get that fulfilled [02:17] SmolDuck: if their need is 'feeling safe’ then they can do that without fronting [02:17] SmolDuck: in my personal experience, ymmv, ianad, etv [02:18] somni: (i think im only a little more than median fragmented but of people in my fragmentation reference class im a LOT more self-aware of the thing) [02:18] somni: nod

hmmm [02:21] somni: you are very focused on taking care of parts and this is good and a thing to do…….

i dont think im as attached to parts-as-they-are but like parts that are anthropically called into existence because they can optimize over a thing (like if a module for containing anxiety isnt good at it, it sort of dies and is replaced with a new pattern; whatever anxiety containment module i have after a bit is a result of an iterative process like this*)

hmmmmmm

i do care about their welfare, but i think i care about them differently?? its hard to put my finger on(edited) [02:24] somni: *i also have spiritual feelings about this wrt people. where problems form voids in space to be filled by people who have shaped themselves to solve the problem [02:25] SmolDuck: hmmmm [02:26] somni: <i <l<3ve3 my spiritual feelings3 [02:31] somni: liike i think okayness works differently when parts of you keep getting replaced and this is standard operating procedure

whereas your parts seem like humans who eat soup and live in a village together and talk

and less like theyll quickly die and be replaced with another thing when the problem shifts [02:31] SmolDuck: nod [02:31] somni: wow okay i have low confidence in this model of my structure but it is like 1/3 right [02:31] somni: maybe 2/3? [02:32] SmolDuck: ………idek if any of us like soup [02:33] somni: hm i meant soup as a stand in for comfort and eating [02:33] SmolDuck: Ahhh [02:33] SmolDuck: I think we like clam chowder [02:35] somni: also im on moda so a lot of the descriptions will be biased towards mania / inducing in me a visceral sense of motion i thiink (die and be replaced is motion-y) [02:35] SmolDuck: ahh [02:35] somni: oooh…. everyone likes clam chowder? [02:38] SmolDuck: yeah [02:38] SmolDuck: some things, we all like, cause they’re pleasant for our body [02:40] somni: wheeew

this is better than last time

wait last time was 50 mg; okay i feel like i might be approaching the harsh meta-ing out event horizon and id want my squid module analogue to help keep calm [02:40] somni: –

hm it is nice that you can agree on something [02:41] SmolDuck: we cooperate pretty well now that we’ve actually talked about this and agreed that mutual cooperation is optimal [02:44] somni: like i can do better meta but at the event horizon things become a Lot and stuff dissolves and syntax feels like an illusion and things connect to other things without bottoming out and stuff dissolves

idk i feel like it diverges from metacog, though the chemicals help metacog in some ways [02:47] somni: okayyy feeling better

i dont need to be so tied to this visceral experience but also have the impulse that i want people with me

it doesnt affect my core i dont think which means panic attack is probs not going to happen [02:49] somni: -

if i become enlightened do i have to let go of drama? (no)

okay good because i like drama and snark and all that gay stuff [02:55] somni: -

so like ive been okay the whole time im so proud of me? im able to meditate in the eye of the storm, of course ive maintained calm under much more difficult circumstances but that was unexpected and i improvised as best i could.

i feel like i can actually do this reliably?

i still have the urge to grouse about it and snark which is spooooky why is this still appealing? is it blindsight grousing? force of habit? if im still attached and want to grouse maybe i havent let… something… go completely? idk what i mean by 'let something go’ but i def mean something [03:14] somni: @SmolDuck thanks for talking with me [03:15] SmolDuck: 👍👌

[yakumtsaki]

Which aspirations do you enjoy playing most and least?

cant blv i forgot about this gr8 ask! let me go all out and do a full ranking

8. family🍼: well u all saw that coming. in 20+ generations of Unions i’ve had a family heir exactly one time and he had a fully autonomous, lifelong affair with his stepmother. i’ve never had a family sim who was, not even gonna say ‘good’, literally just a decent parent, so i’ve truly gotten shit out of this aspiration. for one shining moment it looked like Wyatt was gonna be the one to break the curse but i’m not even gonna acknowledge him now bc he is dead to me

7. popularity☎️: a good idea that was executed in the lamest way possible. from the boring regular wants, to the indescribable lifetime ones, to the fact it’s impossible to play it successfully without making the sim a pathological phone-glued freak, popularity is a sad waste of potential. if they had combined it with the scrapped power aspiration it could actually have some bite and be interesting instead of endless friend-making for friend-making’s sake. its one and only redeeming factor: mean popularity sims 

6. pleasure🌆: the most ~high concept aspiration is also the most hit or miss one, and on sims without the personality to pull it off it can be the blandest one. on top of getting a meh sim, the aspiration points its wishes grant are crumbs, so a lot of times it feels half-baked and makes a better secondary than primary. all that said some of my favorite sims ever have been pleasure, so with the rare right sim none of the above really matters, especially if they roll one of the iconic date ltws 

5. grilled cheese🧀: a cute joke that went way too far but damn if finishing the 200 sandwiches ltw isn’t one of the most fulfilling moments in the entire game

4. grow up🎠: easy, straightforward and relateable as hell. what’s not to like

3. knowledge👽: knowledge is a weird case bc at first glance it looks like it should be chilling at the bottom of the barrel, yet it somehow almost always makes for good gameplay. it’s prob a trifecta of a) being pretty ‘open’ as far as characterization goes, b) a few cool premades making it interesting by association and c) having both fun wants (aliens/ghosts/grim reaper) + high paying careers with some of the best rewards. it’s very well-rounded overall, its only real drawback being that without a more extroverted secondary/living with other sims with such an asp, it gets really boring, really fast. like a house full of knowledge sims a la Curious bros is my literal nightmare. not even alien babies could save that lot

2. romance🔥: the best thing about the romance aspiration is what ultimately dooms it to second place: it was designed to be the most fun one, which it def is, and like most fun things, it’s reaaally hard to keep it up. this has mostly to do with how child-centric the game is, as in there’s simply not enough to do with a single-sim household after a certain point, and i really don’t like forcing romance sims to settle down against their will. ofc there are some exceptions like Gunther rolling the want to get engaged to Brit Brit, but these are so rare, world-shattering, one-in-a-million moments that they might as well be a glitch. to play the typical romance sim in a legacy context without feeling like u’re torturing them or having them cheat, u eventually have to water them down with a family-secondary icecube. so basically the romance aspiration suffers from being in a game that’s not designed to support it long-term, and while it is the funnest one, it falls short of being the total package, unlike……

1. fortune💸: i started answering this ask expecting a grand dilemma bw romance and fortune for the top spot, but it turns out that was just some residual effect of the contentious Gunther/Jojo vote and fortune is hands down my favorite aspiration. like now that i’ve carefully pondered it to a truly embarrassing degree, it’s not even close. on top of being the aspiration most commonly found in my premade hall of fame [Consort, Jessica P. (who btw is canon gay, wake up people), Dina, Dirk, Malcolm L, Gvaudoin, Frances J et al] and ofc, the aspiration of the queen of my heart, Vicky Union, fortune gives me everything i want gameplay-wise: it’s perfect for legacies without forcing u to have copious amounts of children like family and perfect for the mean sims i always get without requiring they be socially competent like romance. the sims are relatively easy to keep happy without being boring + the wants have a good asp points output+ there’s doable ltws and 2 of the most challenging ones in the entire game. finally it’s literally the only aspiration that can make sense with all the other ones both as secondaries AND as romantic pairings, i mean go ahead and try it, shit’s unreal. so at the end of the day fortune wins out over romance bc it’s more versatile and works better in the long haul, which is ~what legacies are all about~ also u kno. u never forget ur first love