#i really liked him sndfjkgvas and i guess i was. Not putting myself first
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GRAGHH
#so i've been looking back at the relationship super critically#and i'm like#hmmmm i should not have let that amount of shit slide#but also i was like#i really liked him sndfjkgvas and i guess i was. Not putting myself first#and although there was A LOT of good#the bad parts although they were few were like. significant#like idk why he kept trying to pursue a romantic relationship with me when he realized 2 months after we met that#i was lacking something that he really needed#whatever#anyways i'm trying to focus extra hard on all the bad reasons so i can be sad as fuck#and MOVE ON nadsjkfdsf#and now he tells me he got me a christmas present#GODDAMN ITTTTTT#i was like huh. maybe we CAN go more than a month without seeing each other#[EXTREMELY LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER]#goddamn it.#when the communication is key person has to communicate but doesnt (me)#tbf i actually don't know what to do#long term about this#because it's not like he's a bad person in any way#but being around me literally makes him anxious and Bad and causes him severe pain. and now i'm trying to Grieve Properly#and hopefully speedrun the 5 stages of grief#after bottling that shit for 2 months straight#so idk if this is the move#i understand he's being nice and i'll accept of course#but. Gah#i actually don't know what to do long term about this#idk#we probably have to move on first ANDJFK
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