#i really just wanted to give vash head scratches ngl

[anime-grimmy]

Guess who got their ass up and actually wrote a fanfic. No, Im not a writer, this is a stream of conciousness which I cannot promise doesn't have obvious flaws, but I wanted to write one of my prompts from here. (it's the "Vash has soft hair" one)

Based in the '98 anime, Vashmeryl-centric.

______

As triste and unforgiving the land of planet Gunsmoke was, the festive atmosphere in the many saloons showed the bright sides of the hard lives of its populace. Meryl and Milly found themselves in one of the most joyful saloons they have been in a while.

The town they were in was barely on the map, just a small cluster of buildings that held maybe a few dozen residents. But as Meryl had gathered from fleeting conversations, despite all odds the small settlement was experiencing a small economic boom. She could have guessed as much, considering all the construction sites they’ve passed just at the outskirts of the town, or the fact the number of thomas in the stables and the cars blocking half the streets seemed out of the ordinary for such a small residency.

So it was no surprise how lively the people were. The saloon was basically glowing, the small lamplights reflecting off the many risen pints of beer. The atmosphere was so joyful with all the shouting, laughing and singing.

Meryl could not care for any of it.

Milly and her were cramped at a small table in the corner of the room, Meryl slumped back in her chair, hands idly turning her whiskey glass in circles without taking a sip. She was just so, so tired, the exhaustion weighing heavy in her bones.

Their few days long travel through the desert felt like it had taken weeks. From encountering sandstorms and bandits, to one of their thomas running off, everything that could have gone wrong, had gone wrong. When Milly and her had arrived at the inn and finally taken a much deserved shower, Meryl had been ready to flop into bed and not open her eyes for at least 11 hours.

To her dismay, the warm water had seemingly energized Milly to the point where she acted like they hadn’t just spent days full of sandy torture. Meryl really had wanted to decline, maybe even let Milly go by herself, but she just knew that the nagging feeling she’d get wouldn’t let her get a wink of sleep.

So, 30 minutes later found them in the brightest saloon for iles, Milly already downing her third drink while Meryl just stared off into space.

It really wasn’t too bad, actually. Milly was having a blast and Meryl was too tired to care for even the rowdier patrons. She just kept on watching the people with mild interest.

Maybe then it was her exhaustion that didn’t make her instantly panic when a very familiar broomhead made his way towards their table. Milly immediately waved Vash over when she spotted him, patting the stool next to her in invitation. Vash was all grins and drunken blush, probably having a big deal to do with the busty brunette slung under one of his arms.

Usually by now, Meryl would be filled with dread, disgust and a lot of other harmful words, but she found her mind was a bit too zoned to get riled up. Instead, she was honestly surprised Vash had managed to land such a woman, knowing how terrible he was at flirting.

It didn’t take too long for her to figure out how though.

The way the brunette was totally playing into his schtick, clanking drinks with him and even complimenting him, yet also keeping him at a physical distance, screamed gold digger to Meryl. She opted not to comment, it was weirdly enjoyable watching Vash dig his own grave.

A little flirty whispering here, some more coins clanking on the table there and a well-manicured hand brushing through the straw hair of his with barely disguised disdain over the woman’s face, Meryl was quite enjoying the show.

Ah, but then Vash got greedy, or too drunk to understand his companion’s signals.

His hand kept sliding too close to areas the brunette didn’t see fit, and after his third attempt, there was palm on his face and a second later, the seat next to him was vacant.

Meryl pulled her glass to her mouth, if only the hide the smile on her lips. The absolutely shocked and longing look he threw after the brunette was so sad that it was hilarious.

Milly, in comparison, didn’t have Meryl’s filter, especially not four pints in. Milly’s laughter was both sweet and boisterous which made Vash turn his hurt gaze onto her. With a loud whine he slid onto the tabletop, crying dramatic tears as usual. Milly slapped his back in comfort (a bit too hard if Vash’ wince was anything to go by) and shouted for another round of drinks.

Half a glass in and the whole escapade seemed to have been forgotten.

With her immediate show now over, Meryl let her eyes slide back over the crowd. Milly, despite being way too deep into her glass, seemingly had Vash under control. As long as the two of them just kept drinking together they’d stay out of trouble, probably, hopefully.

Meryl sighed. She was honestly too exhausted to care much.

The moments ticked by without anything really catching Meryl’s attention. She tuned into some conversations she could overhear or watched people lose at poker, but most patrons seemed to just drink and enjoy each other’s company. With nothing interesting to focus on, Meryl felt her eyelids grow heavy. She really didn’t want to fall asleep in the saloon, not when Milly was too drunk to find her way back to the inn, but the shouts and laughs soon turned into a low buzz in Meryl’s mind.

She was sure she was about to lose her fight against sleep when something blonde popped into her vision.

Meryl jerked back slightly, quickly blinking the drowsiness from her eyes, and turned to look at Vash.

He was leaning forward in his chair, closer to her, staring at her with squinted eyes. Meryl rose her brow at his…accusing? No, maybe puzzled look? She couldn’t quite describe his expression, but he sure was concentrating hard on her.

They spent a few moments like this, Vash just staring intently and Meryl waiting for him to speak what was on his mind. His head cocked to the side and Meryl swore she could see his eyes adjusting. A second later, they flew wide open.

“Holy crap, insurance girl, were you here the whole time?!”

Meryl pinched the bridge of her nose. He couldn’t be serious.

Vash laughed loudly, his chair scraping on the floor as he scooted closer to her. Meryl couldn’t help but lean back a bit when his beer breath hit her nose.

“Wow, you were so quiet, I didn’t even notice you! Wait, is that a new technique so you can watch me from the shadows?!”

Oh boy, he was being so serious about this. This time Meryl was sure his squinted eyes were supposed to be accusatory. She shook her head with a sigh.

“No, Vash, I just really don’t have the nerves today to pity you for being a terrible flirt.”

Vash gasped in offense, his hand flying to cover his heart. Meryl only rolled her eyes.

“Excuse you, that girl was all over me.”

Meryl gave him a deadpan look.

“More like all over your wallet.”

Vash’ hand slid from his chest to his pocket, protectively cradling the bag inside as if Meryl was the one trying to steal it. He held her gaze for a moment, before he cleared his throat and rebutted with way less confidence.

“I might have tried to appeal to her with some of my funds, but I know that my good looks sparked her interest.”

Meryl scoffed. The way the brunette had tried to cuddle up to him with as little touching as possible spoke more of aversion than attraction, which, if Meryl was being honest, was kind of surprising. She may call Vash a lecherous creep sometimes, but he was relatively harmless and not to mention far more handsome than most drunken patrons. Not that she’d tell him that.

“Really now, Vash? You really think that girl was into you? She bolted the moment you tried to make a move on her.”

Meryl was pretty proud of herself how little contempt and judgement clouded her voice as she said this. Still, Vash dramatically recoiled.

“She was just intimidated by my handsome-ness!”

Meryl sighed.

“Yeah, sure.”

Vash gave her the stink eye before leaning in close. Meryl wasn’t entirely sure what he was going for, but any seriousness was off the table with the way his lips pulled into a childish pout.

“She said my eyes were pretty.”

“Aha.”

“She also said my smile was nice.”

“Oh, how original.”

“She ALSO said my hair was great.”

At that, Meryl laughed.

“Vash, that girl barely dared to touch your hair! Not to blame her, I wouldn’t want to stick my hand in a haystack either.”

Vash’ jaw actually dropped at that. Meryl was taken aback how the look on his face wasn’t his usual theatrical performance but looked actually offended. A disapproving noise came from Vash’ throat as he jabbed a finger at her.

“How dare you! My hair is perfectly fluffy and stylish to boot! I will not allow you to insult my soft locks!”

Wait, fluffy?

“Fluffy? You can’t be serious.”

Vash slid the palms of his hands along his hair and then went to frame his face with a hand under his chin. He gave her a dazzling smile.

“Why yes, my dear insurance girl, my wonderful hair is the smoothest silk known to man.”

Meryl’s brow twitched. There was no way. No way in heaven and hell was that broomhead of his anything but dried grass. She’s seen it in action, it never lost form, and even when drenched to the bone his hair managed to look somehow spikey.

“There’s no way.”

“Yes way.”

“I don’t believe you.”

With a huff, Meryl fell back against her chair, crossing her arms in the process. She glared up at Vash, who was only staring back with just as much stubbornness.

Ugh, why was she arguing with him. Her body was almost melting into the chair from how drained her muscles felt, and here she was spending energy bickering with this idiot. And by the way his eyes shone with a challenging glint, she knew their argument was going to go on for hours at this rate.

Even while mulling over how to easily diffuse the situation, Meryl herself didn’t drop her gaze, therefore keeping the tension between the two alight. Vash’ own eyes flitted about, seemingly also analysing the situation, when he suddenly bent forward.

Meryl jerked back at the sudden movement and watched him angle beneath her eyelevel and then turn his face downward.

“Try it.”

Meryl stared at him for a moment.

“Excuse me?”

“Touch my hair.”

Again, Meryl recoiled, thrown off kilter by the sudden demand.

“What, no!”

Vash turned his head to pout up at her.

“Hey, you said you don’t believe it! This is the easiest way to prove it!”

Meryl held his gaze, seeing the dangerous mix out stubbornness and determination written all over his face. She really did not want to touch him, but at the same time, she was just so over this argument.

So, with a defeated sigh, she gave him a small nod.

“Fine, fine, I’ll do it.”

A big grin broke out on Vash’ face before he bend downwards again, presenting her the crown of his head.

Meryl was still hesitant. Somehow, this felt way out of bounds of their relationship, not that she was even sure where the two of them stood on an intimacy basis. But getting a bit flustered being so close to him beat bickering with him for another hour or so.

Swallowing another sigh, Meryl slowly raised her hand to the top of Vash’s spikes and gently took a strand between her fingertips. She rubbed them together slowly to properly feel the texture of his hair, and felt her eyes widen.

There was no way.

Meryl brushed a few more strands between her fingers, still doubting what she was feeling.

The hair felt soft.

Too stunned to accept this fact just yet, Meryl turned her palm towards Vash, gingerly pressing the hair down atop his head. It gave way immediately, bending down with the pressure she put on it and bouncing back up straight once she removed her hand.

Meryl could not believe what she was seeing, could not believe what she was feeling. Of all the impossible things she’s seen Vash do, this somehow felt like the most implausible. It just seemed so out of the laws of physics. After all, she had seen how his hair behaves. Once it was spiked up, his hair never seemed to stray out of its shape. While moving or being caught in the wind, his strands always seemed to move as one form.

But this, this looked and felt like something that should not be happening. Meryl bunched a bit of his hair in a fist, again evaluating how it felt. It wasn’t exactly silk like, how Vash had claimed, it reminded her more of finer, more strand-like thomas down.

Meryl released his hair and pulled her hand back slightly. Eyes still glued to the blonde mess in front of her, Meryl could hear a small voice in the back of her head screaming at her not to do what she had in mind, but her curiosity was too strong to not overrule her logic.

So, tentatively, she let her fingers comb through his hair. She let them slide from atop his forehead into his hairline until all her fingers were submerged in a sea of blonde. Meryl cringed slightly as she could feel some sand and grit in between his strands, but she kept kneading through his locks, untangling some knots she came across.

Meryl hated to admit how fascinating this was. She had always assumed such a dry and rough texture from Vash’ gravity defying hair, and yet, her fingers glided through even smoother than through Milly’s hair after a fresh wash. This blew all of her expectations out of the water, so she couldn’t help but marvel at the experience.

Meryl was only dragged out of her little trance when Milly’s giggling caught her attention. She turned her head towards her colleague, raising a brow in question.

Milly was trying to hide her highly audible laughs with a hand to her mouth, but Meryl couldn’t judge her as the poor girl was swaying in her seat from her buzz. The tall girl was also struggling to get a sentence out between her uncontrollable giggles.

“Aww, Mr. Vash looks like a kitten getting pats!”

Milly burst out into more laughter at her own quip, but Meryl immediately froze as reality caught up to her. With a hammering heart, she looked down towards the man whose hair she’s been toying with for the last few minutes.

Vash, for his part, looked to be in absolute bliss. There was a big, content smile on his face, body laying on the table with his arms serving as a pillow for his head. He had his eyes closed and was humming a sigh every few moments, bright cheeks getting even rosier as his smile grew.

Meryl only noticed now her hand was still scratching at the back of his head.

Flustered, Meryl jerked back her hand, instead opting to press it against her pounding heart. Vash wailed in protest, looking as if he had been ripped out of a cozy dream. Milly only laughed harder.

Oh god, what had she been doing? Was she really that zoned out that she was giving Vash, the absolutely insufferable Stampede, head scratches? This exhaustion must be making her delirious. Yes, that’s what it must have been, the exhaustion.

With a resolute slap on the tabletop, she rose from her seat.

“Ok, that’s it, party over. C’mon Milly, we’re going.”

Twin whines met her ears, but Meryl only glared at the other two.

“No, enough is enough. It’s late, we’re exhausted, and the table is filled with almost a dozen pints. It’s time to turn in.”

Now having her resolve back, Meryl whirled on Vash and flicked him against the nose.

“This also counts for you, Mr. Fluffybuns.”

Resolute on finally getting her well-deserved sleep, Meryl slapped some double dollars onto the table, grabbed Milly by the arm and Vash by the ear, and headed out the saloon.

Sweet bed, here she comes.

______

That was easier said than done, however.

As fate and circumstances would have it, the small size of the town only provided one inn for the whole town, so Meryl found herself dragging two drunken giants along with her.

The inn was a mere five minute walk from the saloon, but the sheer difference in size, mass and drunkenness made it an ordeal for Meryl to keep her two friends on track. She felt like she was running after children that tried their hardest to run off. Only the kids were over a head taller than her and probably could throw her around as easily as a sack of potatoes.

So, it took them a good twenty minutes to finally arrive at their five-minute-away inn, and Meryl all but slumped against the counter. She was just about to ask for their keys when two heavy weights barrelled against hair, squashing her against the table and knocking the air out of her lungs. With a loud groan, she pushed them off of her, shoving them in the direction of the stairs.

“Off with you two! Let me get our keys in peace, geeze.”

Meryl turned with a huff, trying not to look too disgruntled at the man at the counter. Thankfully, if anything it was amusement crossing his features. He offered her a laugh.

“Rough night out?”

“You don’t even know. The keys to room 104 and…”

Meryl noticed she had never asked Vash for his room number. As she turned to yell after the two drunks, a small jingle caught her attention.

“And 107.”

Two pairs of keys were dangling before her eyes. She met eyes with innkeeper who only smiled at her.

“Your buddy came in just a few hours ago, and I wouldn’t forget such a gaudy get up for a while.”

A nervous laugh made its way out of Meryl’s throat. So far no one in town seemed to even have an inkling that Vash was, well, THE Vash the Stampede. Still, comments like these unnerved her just a bit.

“Oh, yeah, he just really tries to stand out, you know. Thinks it’s going to land him some points with the ladies.”

Meryl bit the inside of her cheek. Even to her that explanation sounded kind of fake, but to her relief, the innkeeper’s chuckle seemed sincere.

“Well, just make sure that he doesn’t do anything stupid. The women here are vicious. If he makes the wrong move, they gonna put a bounty on him and come for his head!”

The man cracked up at his own joke, Meryl laughing only to hide how much this unsettled her. She knew it was meant as a joke, but from experience, things always liked to end badly.

So, as not to spill something she didn’t mean to, Meryl yanked the keys from the man’s hand with as much restraint as possible and hurried after her friends.

Milly and Vash were struggling up the stairs as she approached. For a moment, her heart almost jumped out of her throat when the two of them bent backwards at an alarming angle, but they managed to readjust themselves with a loud thud on the stairs, breaking out in drunken giggles.  Meryl moved to shove them up the stairs, trying not to hurry them too much as to prevent them from falling over.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity to Meryl, they arrived at their room door. Meryl had to grab onto Milly and Vash so they wouldn’t mindlessly keep wandering down the hallway. She spun them to face her and thankfully caught their attention. Dangling the key in front of Vash’ face, she placed it in his palm, turned him around and pointed down the corridor.

“Just three doors down from here, alright?”

Vash blinked slowly, moving his eyes from the empty hallway to the key in his hand, down to Meryl and back again. Meryl waited with waning patience as his fuzzy mind processed her order, but not too long and he gave her a lazy smile and an even lazier salute and went to trudge down the corridor.

Sighing in relief, Meryl turned to her own door and unlocked it with a swift movement. The door was barely open a fraction when Milly squeezed through, making a straight beeline for her bed. Meryl could only smile, Milly really had the right idea. Collapsing in bed seemed like the best course of action right now.

However, just as Meryl moved to close the door, a nagging little voice in her mind made her hesitate. With apprehension, Meryl leaned back to see beyond the door and down the hallway.

Vash had, thankfully, found the correct room and was currently trying to push his key in the lock. Emphasis on trying.

With Vash’ glasses on, she couldn’t really read his expression but by the way his brows furrowed and he kept missing the keylock entirely, she was pretty sure his eyes refused to focus. Meryl watched him miss the hole sometimes by an inch, other times barely even striking the metal of the doorhandle. When one miss sent the key clattering to the floor but Vash kept repeating the hand motion still, Meryl groaned in resignation.

She threw a quick glance into her and Milly’s room, only to find her colleague passed out on the bed. Meryl closed the door and locked it, just to play things safe, then quickly crossed the small distance between her and Vash’ room.

Vash, for his part, had finally caught up with the fact that the key was not in his hand anymore. The way he flexed his fingers and frowned down at them were enough to clue Meryl in. When she came up to his side, she gently pushed him back a little.

“Move a bit, will you?”

Meryl noticed him startle, but as soon as recognition settled in he smiled and took a step aside. Meryl bent down to retrieve the fallen key and smoothly unlocked the door. Just like with Milly, the moment the door was open just a slit, Vash pushed his way inside. Meryl threw a glare after him but ultimately let her shoulders slump with a sigh. At least he was safely in his room.

Sticking the key on the inside of the door, Meryl turned to Vash to remind him to lock it after she left, when he suddenly stunned her into a pause.

Instead of flopping into bed, Vash had his duffle bag over his shoulder and was currently pushing open the window. Meryl only managed to startle herself out of her stupor when Vash swung a leg outside the window. With a few quick steps, Meryl bound across the room, grabbed him by the bag and dragged him back into the room. Vash fell flat on his ass, the momentum bringing his feet up in the air, and Meryl used the short moment to slam the window shut.

She whirled on him with an incredulous look on her face.

“What the hell are you doing, Vash?!”

Vash sat up with lighting speed, eyes so big they peaked out from behind his glasses.

“What does it look like, I’m bailing! They’re already after me!”

Meryl felt her heart drop down to her knees. Vash was being pursued? Why hadn’t he said anything until now? Wait, if he was being followed why had he even stopped here? And how could he let himself get this plastered knowing there was danger?

Shaking her head wildly, Meryl quickly dispelled the mounting questions from her mind. Now was not the time to fall into panic.

“Vash, what are you talking about? Who is after you and since when?”

Vash was back on his feet again, trying to edge closer to the window, but Meryl planted herself as a barricade, not allowing him to leave before she got the answers. With an indigent whine, he met her eyes.

“Didn’t you hear the innkeeper? They’re already out for my head! There’s no telling how long it will take ‘til they get me!”

Air tight in her lungs, Meryl’s eyes widened as realisation hit her.

Then she smacked Vash upside the head.

Meryl rubbed her face tiredly as irritation burnt through even her strongest haze.

“Vash, you idiot, the guy was JOKING. Now stop acting stupid and get your drunk ass in bed.”

When Vash still looked resistant, Meryl’s patience was worn too thin to talk him into doing anything. Instead, she just yanked the bag from his shoulders, grabbed him be the suspenders at his back and dragged him over to the bed. With a strong shove, she pushed him onto the bed. Vash landed with a pained grunt, but the moment he realised the softness he found himself in, his body went lax with a content sigh.

Feeling a headache come on, Meryl rubbed her temples as she thought about what to do next. With a longing look at the door, she debated whether to just leave and finally get the sleep she so desired, but Vash was hanging halfway off the bed, still fully clothed and with a gun strapped to his leg. Against her better judgement, Meryl went to close the still wide-open door and go help Vash properly get into bed.

She returned to him no 10 seconds later, and his hip was already sliding off the mattress. With a result huff, Meryl grabbed him by the belt of his coat and dragged his body fully onto the bed. She made quick work of the clasps of his boots, sliding them off and arranging them next to the bed. Next followed the knee protectors and his gun, which she decided to keep on the nightstand to still be in quick reach for him. Once again, Meryl pulled him up by the suspenders that connected to the back part of his coat, and settled him against the wall to more easily open the buttons of his coat.

She took a moment to read his expression, mostly to see if he was still awake. The reflection of his glasses didn’t give her any insight on what he might be thinking, but when his lips slowly stretched into a smug grin, she was at least sure he wasn’t asleep.

“Oh my, insurance girl, didn’t peg you for the handsy type.”

Meryl just rolled her eyes at the overly suave tone and slapped him against the chest.

“Oh, shut up, you. Don’t spout such nonsense, rather help me get this off.”

At her comment, Vash’ grin only grew but he did as he was told. With practice ease the last few buckles and buttons popped open and he slid out the form fitting coat like it was no problem. With a little shift of his hip, he tugged it out from under him and let it crumple to the floor. Apparently satisfied to be freed from excess weight, Vash let himself fall back onto the bed with his hands behind his head.

Meryl just shook her head at his antics and retrieved the coat from the floor. She was honestly surprised his coat was in such good condition with how little care he seemed to handle it. She hung the coat up on a chair and took the time to right the discarded duffle bag as well. Stepping back to Vash’ bedside, Meryl reached down to eventually pluck the glasses from his nose.

To her surprise, an arm snaked around her waist and pulled her down. With a startled gasp, Meryl tried to retrieve her balance but ultimately found herself sat down the edge of Vash’ bed. He was grinning up at her with a mischievous glint in his eyes, but Meryl only graced him with a huffed sigh. She placed his glasses by his gun before trying to peel off his hold on her.

“Come on, Vash, let go, I wanna get to bed as well.”

Meryl bit her lip, believing she might have given him just another sentence to easily turn into a tease, but Vash only laughed softly and secured his grip on her waist.

“Aww, come on, insurance girl, just until I’m asleep? Don’t wanna get nightmares. It will be real quick, I promise.”

Now, that was an unusually honest sounding request. Meryl peered down at him. Vash’ looked and sounded rather sincere, which perplexed Meryl a great deal. Even if drunk, since when did he act like this in front of her?

Still somewhat taken aback, Meryl gave a slow nod and let herself relax against the bedside. Vash looked content, small smile turning gracious, and closed his eyes with a sigh.

As he promised, he slipped off into sleep only a few moments after. Meryl couldn’t help but watch him. His little smile soon turned lax, his jaw even hanging open slightly. The arm around her loosened its grip until Vash’ hand lay slack on her lap. She could easily unwind herself from him now, leave and finally get to her own bed, but something in the carefree, calm and dare she say, vulnerable expression on Vash’ face made her so mesmerized she couldn’t get herself to move.

Then, a little twitch of the hand in her lap. Muscles tensing in his arms up to his shoulders. His jaw clamped shut and his brows furrowed. His dreams seemed to turn sour.

Meryl watched him still, apprehensive on what to do. Had he actually known he’d experience a nightmare? Was it something that had happened, or was it the alcohol that made his mind turn dark?

Either way, he seemed to have anticipated it even in his drunken stupor, and he had asked Meryl to stay.

Slowly, with her own hand trembling, she laid her thumb on the crease of his brow. With gentle strokes, she tried to ease the tension, staying attentive on how his body reacted to her touch. His muscles relaxed just a bit, the arm around her not clutching at the fabric of her shirt anymore. But the furrow in his brow and the downturn of his lips wouldn’t leave his face.

The image of a goofy smile and feeling of feather-light texture beneath her fingertips rushed through her mind.

Ever so slowly, her fingertips glid across his forehead until they met the base of his hairline again. With one smooth motion, Meryl buried her fingers in his hair. She let her nails lightly scrub against his scalp and once again carefully loosened any tangles she could find.

The effect was instant. She had not brushed her fingers through his hair three times when a heavy sigh left him, and so did the tension. The knit of his brow immediately evened out and his mouth popped back open in tiny breaths. His body basically melted into the bed after only few moments of her combing through his hair.

Vash was doing fine, he was fine. She could leave.

Meryl really didn’t want to leave.

A humourless laugh left her. She felt so selfish, enjoying an intimate moment like this even though Vash was so vulnerable underneath her hands. Meryl couldn’t deny the happy buzz beneath her skin to see him so content, so at ease. She also couldn’t deny the thrill it sent through her as smooth locks glid in between her fingers.

She wanted this, she wanted this so badly, but she also knew she couldn’t for so many reasons.

She knew Vash. No matter how big a flirt he was, intimacy was just something he seemed to deny himself at any cost, be that physical or emotional. Not that she was any better. Meryl had to bitterly admit that she was not ready to act truthful to her emotions either, she was too prideful and scared to do that.

So, sharing such a calm moment together, while one half was in drunken, sleepy daze, felt both exhilarating and awful at the same time.

But still, Vash had let her close, had requested her presence, even if he was drunk. So even if it was egocentric of her, if only for a few moments more, she wanted to be self-indulgent and enjoy the quietness and intimacy she could only dream of.

Vash was drunk out of his mind, he wouldn’t remember this.

He would never have to know.

______

Except when opening her eyes the next morning, an aquamarine gaze was staring right back at her. There was surprise, confusion, realisation and some kind of excitement sparkling back at her, and Meryl couldn’t stop the thrum that went through her body.

Oh, she was not ready to face these feelings just yet.

So a scream, a slap and a flustered march back to her own room would have to do for now.