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atopearth · 3 years ago

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Brothers Conflict (Passion Pink) Part 4 - Asahina Tsubaki Route

Time for Tsubaki, yay! Aww, it's kinda cute how passionate Subaru and Yusuke are rooting for their respective basketball teams lol. I love how Azusa and Tsubaki invited Ema to their event, and I loved how Ema gave a lot of thought into her answers when they asked her how the event was. It was really cute how she felt proud that they were her brothers when people really liked the event and praised them hahaha. On the other hand, lmao at Tsubaki wanting to jump into her arms every time she said something cute, and lolll at Juli getting annoyed at Tsubaki getting so close to Ema. It was hilarious when Tsubaki told Ema to leave the squirrel behind next time there's an event since it's so noisy😂😂 Aww I love the aquarium date where Tsubaki touches her cheek saying she's cold, and Ema touches his hand to say he's cold too, that's pretty adorable, they even seemed to hold hands for a bit?!🥲 I also really liked how he guided her like a prince/butler to the horse riding part of the zoo haha, it's never boring with Tsubaki and his antics.

Loll at Rui getting heatstroke after building a sandcastle🤣 Wow, Azusa and Tsubaki can drive a boat? Dangg. Aww, I love how they both reassured Ema that they'll definitely protect her (when it started raining and the boat engine "broke down") and held her hand to show their conviction and give her warmth since it was cold. I knewww Tsubaki was lying about the engine! Poor Ema. She was so worried. I'm kinda sad that Tsubaki doesn't get an individual moment on the holiday with Ema though! Tsubaki picking clothes for Ema during a shopping date is the best~ I love how encouraging he is and how he earnestly loves dressing her up and wanting to match with her, it's so cute haha. It's so adorable how happy Tsubaki was to eat Ema's handmade bento, lmao when he kept telling her to feed him loll. Okay, lmao at if Ema stays to watch Tsubaki and Azusa and see them "confess their love" to each other with the roses CG hahahaha. They were pretty into it (for their acting)😂 At least Tsubaki was pretty upfront with her that a guy and a girl in the same room sleeping together would make him think about things hahaha, it's cute how he gave her a kiss on the forehead~ and I guess he gave her one on the lips too when she was "asleep". Wow, he even kissed her in the morning lol! I guess he's really going to try his best to make her realise she likes him too lol. Ohh woww, he kissed her in the bed and then asked to kiss her in other places loll, too bad Ema still wants to just treat him as an older brother even though as Tsubaki said, they've done things that have crossed the line ages ago lol. Anyway, lmao how when Ema can't fall asleep, instead of counting sheep, Tsubaki counts Azusas😂😂😂

I wonder why Tsubaki seems to be worried or sad over Azusa? Anyway, as I said before (in Hikaru's post), I really liked how Tsubaki convinced Ema to go back and talk to her dad (when she found out she was adopted) and told her that she's become someone important to him and not just a "moe" little sister to him, and that these thoughts didn't need actual ties of blood, so her dad should treasure her too regardless of their blood ties. LMAO at Ema shooing Juli out into the hallway because she wanted to concentrate on the game she was playing with Tsubaki and not hear Juli nagging and telling her to study lolol. I see...so Tsubaki feels like he's inferior to Azusa in terms of acting and everything, and it doesn't help that Azusa actually started voice acting stuff later than him and mainly did it because Tsubaki felt like something was missing when he went to classes without Azusa. I guess it's kinda like that with siblings who are "better" than you. You'll always feel a bit jealous, but having them beside you makes you happy so it's a pretty conflicting feeling. Awww, I loved how Ema was really good at the game and the strategies etc, and Tsubaki told her to make him "fall for her" with her strategies hahaha.

I honestly didn't think a depressed Tsubaki would make my heart break so much. It was so sad that Tsubaki was dropped from the audition for the lead of the anime series he always wanted to be in, it was basically his dream...and it wasn't because he lacked anything, it's just that the producers (I think?) decided on Azusa already. I'm glad Ema told him what she thought and how Azusa was really worried too but didn't want to hurt his feelings. Omgg when he asked her to stay overnight because he didn't want to be alone and wanted to be with her🥺 Lmaoo at Ema the pro gamer ordering Natsume, Tsubaki and Azusa around, she's such a leader when it comes to games. I find it hilarious that Natsume even said not many people in his company have played as many hours as her😂 It's so funny how they're all so shocked that her personality changes when she's playing games😂 Lmao at Azusa asking Ema to go with Tsubaki to the shops because he doesn't trust him and basically calls him a kid with an income so he probably can't control himself during Christmas time😂😂 I really liked how Tsubaki thanked her for her encouragement and made him think it's okay to be him, and move forward as his energetic self because everyone loves that part of him I guess? Okay, I did not expect Tsubaki to hold Ema's hands and blow on them to keep them warm because that was super cuteee! Awww and he put her hand in his pocket so she wouldn't be cold!

Honestly, seeing Tsubaki break down over the collapsed Azusa was really heartbreaking. Suzumura Kenichi (Tsubaki's VA) was so good here, because I could really feel Tsubaki's desperation and pain, and how much guilt he felt afterwards (at the hospital when he refused to leave until he saw Azusa) for being "selfish" at being absorbed by his feelings and forgetting that everyone else is worried and scared too. I really loved Ema at the hospital, she convinced and really helped Tsubaki realise that his worried and dejected face would not be what Azusa would like to see, and that he needs to go to the company and tell them about Azusa's condition so they can rearrange his jobs etc. I knew Azusa's condition would lead to Tsubaki being able to finally take on the lead of that robot anime role he always wanted, but yeah I think Tsubaki's complicated feelings about it are understandable. This role is his dream, but he doesn't feel like he earned it, and is merely Azusa's replacement and I think that's a saddening way to achieve your dream. But at the same time, I'm sure Ema and his fans will be able to show him that this isn't pity and underserved, that he's not a replacement and is his own person. And I really liked how Ema did it! She told him she liked Tsubaki's voice, so there was no point copying Azusa, and that even though they may be twins, they are their own person, and that both their voices are different and are wonderful in their own ways and have their respective charms. I think I really liked it when Ema said she wanted to hear HIS voice. I liked how he ended up asking her what else she liked about him aside from his voice hahaha. Awww he gave her a kiss! Omggg he totally went for it and kept giving her kisses! Woww, hahaha, Ema wasn't the most comfortable because she still wants to think of him as a brother and this was in the living room, but she was definitely just embarrassed.

I'm soo happy Tsubaki finally told Azusa about how he always had a inferiority complex towards him but now he’s decided to face himself and understand he has his own qualities. I'm sure that's a relief to Azusa as well since Azusa was also worried and didn't know what he should do. I can't believe Azusa had to stay in the hospital for a whole month though! And he's going to work again the day after?? He's so hard-working. Aww nooo, Azusa actually told Ema he likes her but knows that her heart is with Tsubaki😭 I'm sad that Tsubaki had to say that he found someone more important to him than Azusa because I loveee Azusa and Tsubaki, however I can understand that they are probably way too attached to each other and it's inevitable that they'll find other people they will love. Anyway, I loved how Tsubaki told Ema how much he appreciates her, loves her and wanted her to be his girlfriend~ And I'm glad Ema could finallyyyy accept his feelings hahaha. They're honestly soo cute as a couple and I love how she practises his lines with him but I hope he still practises with Azusa every now and then because I think those are very precious moments they should continue to cherish~ Omggg at him telling her the room was soundproof hahaha. The CG was niceeee. Omgggg at the twins ending? Harem ending? Hahahah. I mean, I definitely wouldn't mind Azusa and Tsubaki...because I love them both too lolll. Ema is so lucky🥺

Overall, I loved Tsubaki's route. Definitely my favourite route right now. It has great romance development with Ema AND I loved his personal struggles with work and his love for Azusa, but also his inferiority complex towards him. I think these were portrayed really well, and I honestly really felt for Tsubaki's emotions and his ups and downs. I really liked seeing the "other side" to Tsubaki where he gets down about stuff, but at the same time acknowledging that the energetic and cheerful Tsubaki is who he is and what everyone loves. I think Ema supported Tsubaki really well in this route and also showed how strong of a person she was too. I thought I would have to resist from loving Azusa too much, but as Tsubaki realised in the end, Tsubaki definitely has his own charms and I totally fell for them. He's loving, sweet and unafraid to show his emotions and his love to Ema and I think there's a great balance of him showing his physical affection towards her as well as the emotional connection he feels for her. I definitely enjoyed every moment of it, every time I think about Tsubaki and everything that happened in this route, my heart just feels so warm and happy haha🥲🥲

#brothers conflict

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paintedrecs · 4 years ago

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Helloo i saw a tweet you made saying you recently watched a bunch of gay animes and i was wondering if you could perhaps make a list and post them on twitter? I'm always looking for anime to watch and i know your tastes align with mine. If it isn't too much of a bother perhaps? I hope you have loveky days!!!❤❤❤❤

Hey friend! I put off answering this, sorry, because my answers tend to be unnecessarily long and I was v tired when I got the original message. But if you’re still interested, here’s a lil rundown of some of what I’ve been watching/reading. In reference to this tweet, where I was watching a show that definitely isn’t gay but is kinda gay if you just squint the tiniest bit, which I’ve gotten used to doing.

If you follow me on twitter, most of these proooobably won’t be new? But I talk about/RT things on a scattered basis, so maybe there are some you haven’t checked out yet.

So, the canonical gay! I’m only going to list the ones I liked and/or remember most - my Quest For Gay Anime started two years ago, and I watched pretty much everything I could get my hands on, but at that point, there were only a few I loved enough to rewatch/buy/recommend. The list has gotten a little longer since then, unfortunately for my attention span and wallet.

(I’ll be honest, a lot of the really popular/older BL have too many consent issues for my tastes - I understand the context and all that, and no hate on anyone who loves stories that didn’t particularly appeal to me. But I’m including this note cause (a) if I don’t put a really well-known BL anime on this list that’s probably why (b) I’m gonna drop in a few that toe that line but I’ll try to include warnings where relevant.)

ANIME FAVES

DOUKYUSEI (Classmates)

This is kinda where it all started. I saw a tweet going around with a trailer for a very soft, lovely movie about two boys falling in love, and I thought whaaaaat an actual gay story? Where they kiss? And I don’t have to just imagine it??

Still one of my top faves. It’s beautifully animated - like filming watercolors? It always makes me feel languid and happy. The story and characters are realistic, in a very kind, hopeful way, as these two navigate starting a relationship that neither of them expected. It’s available on Amazon video - I own a digital copy there, hah, as well as the physical blu-ray, because I watch it often enough to want both.

I also recommend the manga, although I’ve only recently discovered that apparently the story did not end after the first three volumes, so I can only recommend that far. (I’ve heard it, unfortunately, gets angstier, and it’s still incomplete? The first three volumes feel complete to me, so I’m happy to leave it there if so.)

The movie pretty much covers the first manga volume - it’s a very accurate page-to-screen translation - and there’s some really wonderful relationship building and exploration of family dynamics in the next two volumes.

HITORIJIME MY HERO (My Very Own Hero)

Another huge favorite that I have literally watched like 30 times at this point. Two gay couples, double the fun, although this pairing is by far my favorite.

I’ll direct you to my very long post on this topic for more information, but the short version is:

Warning: there is an age gap and student/teacher relationship, but it’s treated very thoughtfully and is directly addressed as part of the story. They have to navigate through how to make their relationship work (issues with friends, coworkers, society). And they didn’t meet as student/teacher - it’s a lot more complicated, with some fantastic family dynamics. There’s a lot of angst to Setagawa’s backstory that makes you really appreciate the happiness and love he finds with Kousuke & his whole family. (Many more details in my watch-this-anime post.)

The series is 12 episodes long, with a WONDERFUL (happy) ending that makes me cry LITERALLY EVERY SINGLE TIME. Gosh I love this show a lot. It packs some serious feels - I cry, I laugh, I cry again, but for happy reasons.

It’s from a manga, but I do not recommend the manga. The manga falls into a lot of the tropes that I personally don’t like; I think the anime does a much better job of tackling the complexity of their story and treating these two with the thoughtful nuance they deserve.

Can be found on Amazon; I bought the blu-ray, and it’s one of the exceedingly rare cases where I love both the sub and the dub. There are slight differences in translation that really makes it worth watching both.

GIVEN

Wow, this one. Available on Crunchyroll, 11 episodes with a movie coming soon.

It’s newer to my list, and it’s really, really good. I’ve only read the first two volumes of the manga so far (with two more on preorder), because tbh I have trouble reading scanlations online and find it a lot more enjoyable to just wait for the official translations in paperback form.

So far the anime lines up pretty closely with the manga, so I do recommend both, although at this point I enjoy the anime more - partly because of some of the choices they make in rearranging/expanding scenes, and partly because it’s a story about a band, so it makes a huge difference to be able to actually hear the music.

And Mafuyu’s song is worth it. Wow. I listened to it on repeat for like two weeks after the episode first aired.

Uenoyama (the dark-haired stern-looking heart-of-gold character, I have a type), is my favorite. He is a MASSIVE disaster gay, and a lot of his scenes are absolutely hilarious. The dynamics between the characters aren’t what you’d expect - it’s amazing to watch the seemingly quiet Mafuyu come out of his shell and display his true personality - and there’s some really gritty, emotional material, too.

What’s fascinating about this one is that there are parallel stories going on about past loves and heartbreak, and how truly loving (and losing) someone doesn’t mean you can’t find happiness again.

(Warning and a spoiler: there is a suicide that happens before this story starts - Mafuyu’s ex-boyfriend - and while nothing about it is graphic, that event is central to Mafuyu’s story, so there are some weighty episodes. It ultimately leads to him meeting Uenoyama and joining the band. And finding himself again.)

The movie’s gonna focus more on the secondary couple, but I’m still excited to see more of them! And...more angst, I imagine, but hopefully a lot more happiness as well.

SARAZANMAI

Okay, fair warning: this show is weird.

I think if you’re familiar with Japanese folklore, particularly kappas, you might have a much better intro than I did, but considering the creator laughed about how much they got away with by hiding the weirder parts of the story during the initial pitch, I...am not sure about that.

It’s weird but I liked it a lot. I’m not even going to attempt to explain it in the space available here, but the wiki page has a decent summary if you’re curious before diving in.

The very, very condensed version is that the main characters are three middle school boys who get turned into kappas by the kappa prince, who sends them on missions to retrieve “dishes of hope” every episode. In the process, they learn more about themselves and each other, since each time they complete one of these missions, it results in one of their big secrets being spilled to the others.

I like the main trio (and there’s a gay subplot there, too, where one of the boys is in love with his best friend but doesn’t know how to tell him), but I started watching the show because of the “villains,” Reo and Mabu. They have a deeply angsty backstory that you don’t get to until the last couple episodes. Up until then, they have a transformation sequence every episode that ... yes, gets repetitive, Miraculous Ladybug-style, but I still sat and watched, entranced, every time.

One of the things I like about this anime is that while it is very, very gay, it’s not about being gay. It’s a fantasy story where several characters just happen to be gay. As much as I love romance (which the rest of these recs definitely have been), I like being able to see gay people (or kappas...) in different genres, just existing.

And if you can’t get into the show (11 episodes, available on Crunchyroll), there’s a spinoff manga about Reo and Mabu being disaster dads to a baby girl they find on a dish in the middle of the street. I think it’s a human AU (kinda?), but it’s super sweet and funny and I liked it a lot.

THE BETRAYAL KNOWS MY NAME

Okay, so this was an early favorite, and I rewatched it recently and laughed a lot about how massively dramatic it is, but I don’t care, I’m still into it.

We’re skirting the edge of “canon gay” here, because you never get an on-screen kiss, and it’s technically a shoujo manga. But...it was at the top of a lot of BL lists when I was first hunting for good stuff to watch, and the relationship between Yuki and Luka is deeply romantic (and achingly piningly good) and central to the story.

The title’s linked to one of Luka’s frequent lines: “I will never betray you,” which he earnestly tells Yuki at every opportunity he gets. Luka is an extremely powerful demon, and Yuki is part of an immortal (via reincarnation) clan that hunts demons. But in Yuki’s past life, they fell in love.

Yuki was, at that point and in previous lives, a woman, but something changed this time around: he was reborn as a man, and without any of his memories.

Luka, who waited for Yuki to be reincarnated so they could be together again, still remembers and still loves him. But he keeps his devotion on Yuki’s terms, refusing to force the memory of a relationship that Yuki might have wanted to forget.

There’s one particularly great scene where the leader of Yuki’s clan asks Luka if anything has changed - if they can still rely on Luka to stay by Yuki’s side and be his protector. “They have the same soul,” Luka says. Gender doesn’t matter. He loves Yuki. He’ll always love Yuki.

And Yuki, though he doesn’t remember loving Luka, begins to slowly, inevitably, fall in love again.

The anime is 24 episodes - while it doesn’t fully close out the story, it does have some closure, or at least a solid sense of an upcoming happy ending. (I own the DVD; I don’t think the show is currently available to watch online.)

There’s also a manga, which is beautifully illustrated, wow, the sheer level of detail in this blows me away. Which, unfortunately, was way too much work to maintain at that level and ultimately destroyed the author’s health, so the last few volumes get shorter and shorter and the story trickles to an unsatisfying conclusion.

I still love it a lot, though, and it’s another example of establishing a great relationship within the context of a much larger story - a sweeping, complicated fantasy epic.

HONORABLE MENTIONS

Those are my primary favorites, unless I’m forgetting anything (and for the purposes of this post, I’m leaving out things like Tiger & Bunny and Promare, which are very gay and embraced as such by the creators but also not something I’m comfortable including in a Definitely Canonically Gay, You Won’t Ever Be Disappointed By Future Reveals list). If I have the energy, I might make another post like this for those kinds of stories.

But there are a few others that I enjoyed, if not enough to buy copies of or collect merch for. These include:

No. 6

Dystopian, so definitely very dark and kind of visually disturbing in places (for instance, people rotting from mystery infections). There’s a central m/m romance and one kiss, but the ending is kind of an open one without a super happy conclusion. It doesn’t have high rewatch value for me - I’ve only ever watched it once and don’t really feel inclined to go back - but it's got good storytelling and is worth viewing.

Kizuna Koi No Kara Sawagi (Much Ado About Nothing OVA)

That last bit of the title is important to get you to the correct OVA, since there are different variations of this story. It’s been a long time since I tried the main anime, but I did not like it - I had major issues with its story, particularly with the sexual assault plotline. I did, however, love the OVA and have recommended it to people as something that can be watched independently.

There's still a little dodgy content in it (as with a lot of things in the BL genre), but it's mostly a lovely established relationship story with a lot of bittersweet feels, with flashbacks to how the couple got together.

It’s necessarily a "happy" story either, though, because they're in a loving, committed relationship in a society where they can't be open about that, and it takes a toll. They're doing their best to work through the difficulties together.

Ai no Kusabi

SERIOUS WARNINGS FOR THIS ONE.

It's about a society with "Blondies" as the elite ruling class and dark-haired "Mongrels" from the slums. There's slavery, plus some serious sexual consent issues...which I found extra prevalent in the newer version (prettier animation but much more cringey on the content).

The 90s version has rougher animation but a more interesting story. The relationship is still not necessarily healthy, but it reads as a lot more of a forbidden love BDSM relationship.

Even so, the ending is SUPER unhappy. I cannot emphasize that enough. I was watching all these things on my own without any warnings, so this one hit me really hard, and I couldn't stop thinking about it for days after. I’m not sure if I'd watch it again, but I've had interesting conversations with others who did.

I guess what I liked about it is that it’s a very different kind of story - and like I said earlier, it’s nice to have variety in genres. As long as every story isn’t dark and tragic, it’s worthwhile to sometimes experience ones that are told well. And weirdly (since this is not something I would watch with my family) it reminded me to some extent of the movies I grew up with - the 80s and early 90s had a lot of dark sci-fi, and my family really loved watching them, so there’s something...nostalgic about how disturbing it is? Thanks parents. At least this one’s gay.

Gakuen Heaven

To pull us back from the darker content, here’s one that I guess was adapted from a dating computer game. As far as I can remember, it was pretty free of cw; fun but not as emotionally engaging as some of the others. It’s pretty much just a fluffy story about a boys’ school on an island with a mystery plot and a romance.

MANGA RECS

I sprinkled some manga recs alongside the relevant anime, but here are a few others that I’ve only experienced in book form. (I’ve got one on my nightstand right now that I need to read, but if it’s good I’ll just update this post I guess, I’ve put this reply off for long enough.)

OUR DINING TABLE

Unlike a lot of the other manga I’ve read, this is a single volume, which means it has a nice, solid conclusion that wraps everything up wonderfully and doesn’t leave you any room to worry that the author will insert unnecessary drama down the line. (That’s an issue, ok? It happens a lot.)

A very soft, sweet romance that’s actually a lot more about building family - which is something that hugely appeals to me. Highly recommend. Loved it, bought it, will definitely reread it. I’d love to see it eventually made into a movie, like Doukyusei.

MY BROTHER’S HUSBAND

This is a hefty book - I ordered it after seeing a joke-tweet about the live action adaptation (which I haven’t been able to find to watch online). I was surprised by the size of the book but even more (pleasantly!) surprised by its contents. I’m not familiar with the author’s other works, although I’ve heard this is the uh....softest and sweetest of his writing. It’s honestly way more uplifting and healing than I was expecting.

Again, it’s largely about family: a quiet, very private Japanese dad dealing with a visit from his deceased (estranged) twin’s extroverted and cheery Canadian husband. This could go down some very dark paths, but it really doesn’t...there are some smatterings of homophobia mixed in, since that’s sort of the point, but there’s a lot of wonderful self-discovery and building new family bonds.

OUR DREAMS AT DUSK

Oh man. This series. Irene Koh (Legend of Korra comics illustrator) recommended it on twitter, and I picked up the first volume from my library and then could not stop. All four volumes are now out in official translations, and they’re so, so good.

These are definitely on the more realistic side - less of an idealized, prejudice-free view of the world, with more of an accurate picture of what it’s like to be not-straight in Japan.

And I phrase it that way because there’s a lot of variety in the characters in these books. The main character is gay - just coming to terms with the fact that he is, because life would be so much easier if he didn’t have a crush on the hot guy at school.

Content warning: it gets so bad at school, in fact, that he starts out the book planning to commit suicide. It’s dark. But it gets much better, and by the final volume he’s grown so much in his confidence and sense of self-worth - because he becomes a part of a community of other people who teach him that it’s okay to be himself.

And all the other storylines are wonderful. Some of the other characters you get to know include a trans guy, an ace woman, two girls who (spoilers!) get married in the fourth volume, and a much older gay guy who’s been with his partner for several decades.

It’s not a fluffy story - there’s some really tough material throughout, and people aren’t always nice, even the ones you really, really want to be - but they also learn and work hard at communicating with each other. I think these are pretty extraordinary books. Beautiful and heartbreaking but also deeply affirming.

#anime recs #manga recs #long post #I'm sure I've forgotten something oh well I'll just do a follow up post #sorry for the slow reply anon #Anonymous

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murasaki-murasame · 4 years ago

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Thoughts on Fruits Basket 2019 2nd Season Ep11: “All Mine”

After the emotional intensity of the beach arc, we finally return to good old fashioned comedy hijinks for a refreshing and uplifting episode of- haha lol the Pain Train’s just getting started, folks.

Thoughts under the cut.

As I figured last week, this episode skipped forward a bit to cover chapters 67 and 68 [but with a bit of chapter 66 at the start to lead into it], which makes a lot of sense since they’re rearranging things so that we cover a few more plot points before the next school term starts.

The next episode preview confirms that we’re getting the Hatori/Mayu episode next week, which makes a lot of sense, since the school conference stuff where that gets alluded to happens pretty much right after the school term starts back up. I don’t think I realized that until I went back after last week’s episode and checked the manga again, but it makes sense that they’d have to do it now, rather than later. I’m glad they opted to move it to the very end of the summer vacation part of the story, though, since it wouldn’t have felt natural to have it happen in the middle of the beach arc.

And this way it also means that they barely have to change the context of the Hatori/Mayu stuff at all, since it’ll still take place in the same summer vacation period, just after the beach arc instead of during it. It might still feel like a bit of an abrupt plot detour, but less so than in the manga.

Anyway, this episode was basically split between Tohru talking to Kazuma about the curse, and the whole Kagura/Kyo scene that finally expands upon Kagura’s motivations and backstory. And even though some of the art and animation in this episode felt a bit wonky, the writing was still really good, and this ended up being just as engaging and emotional as pretty much any other episode we’ve gotten in season 2 thus far, even if it’s a bit more low-key and transitional than the beach arc was.

The stuff with Tohru and Kazuma was pretty much entirely exposition and foreshadowing, plot-wise, but it’s a good way to basically summarize everything the beach arc told us, and to make it absolutely clear what Tohru’s motivation is going to be for the entire second half of the series. The nature of the curse is also elaborated on a bit more by Kazuma, which is nice. At this point in the story, even though there’s various plot twists and reveals to be had about Akito’s backstory and the whole origin of the curse, we pretty much know everything we need to know about the curse after this episode. Kazuma explains that, at least as far as he knows, the curse is pretty much just the twisted and restrictive bond between the zodiac members that enforces this cycle of artificial togetherness, and in a lot of way’s that’s pretty much the gist of the whole curse.

Which is also why he told Tohru that in a lot of ways she’s already doing everything she needs to do to try and help everyone, since her presence in their lives is pretty much exactly what they all need to start questioning and stepping away from the curse. But of course it’s not like Tohru’s gonna just sit back and not actually *do* anything about it, lol.

This episode also continues to show us how Rin is really similar to Tohru in spite of how different their personalities are, since she’s also trying to break the curse in her own way, even if the story hasn’t delved into her backstory and motivations for that just yet. I think it’s a good choice to have someone like Rin who ultimately shares Tohru’s goal, but clashes with her because she doesn’t want someone like Tohru to be trying to break the curse, for several reasons. I just think it’s neat that Akito’s not the only person who’s actively against what Tohru’s doing, but for entirely different reasons.

And then there’s all the stuff with Kagura. To be honest I’ve never liked Kagura at all, and even after this part of the story I still don’t, but I at least appreciate that this makes her into more of an actual fleshed-out character and not just a walking cliche who doesn’t really work at all in the modern era.

I think the main reason why her material here kinda falls flat to me is that it feels like the story as a whole tries to have it’s cake and eat it too with her. I don’t think she ever pulls the same tsundere antics again after this point, but it doesn’t retroactively erase the fact that we still got so many unironic examples of that trope earlier in the story, and that it was obviously designed to be appealing to people who like that trope, even if it gets interrogated in this episode. But it’s still nice to see Kagura herself acknowledge why she does it and how unhealthy it is.

It at least also plays a pretty important role in Kyo’s overall role in the story, and it’s a pretty big example of how he’s treated as the cat spirit in practice. Characters like Akito and his father actively hate him for it, but Kagura has this mix of pity and genuine love for him. Which is kinda true for Kazuma as well, but it plays out way differently with them because of how Kagura first met Kyo when they were kids, and Kazuma was an adult who adopted Kyo, so they went down the path of pitying and then genuinely loving Kyo in notably different ways. And the fact that nobody, not even Akito, ever actually cares about Kagura’s feelings for him also go to show how much Kyo is seem as a non-entity by the family as a whole, which means that Kagura’s feelings for him aren’t seen as any sort of a ‘threat’ to the system, like what happened with Hatori and Mayu, or Kisa and Hiro.

It’s also pretty noteworthy that Kyo is so calm and honest with her in this episode, but I think it’s a little inaccurate to sum it up as him developing as a character and getting more mature. To some degree that’s true, but I think his attitude in this episode has much more to do with how he just got done dealing with all the trauma of the beach arc, which left him completely resigned to his fate of being imprisoned, which for better or worse has lead to him not getting worked up over things as much as he used to. The part where he bluntly tells her that he’s never going to fall in love with her in particular just seems like an extension of how he told Akito that he’s never going to fall in love with anyone.

And in it’s own way it’s kinda messed up that they’re only able to have this sort of sincere talk about their feelings because Kyo’s lost all hope for his future, even if Kagura doesn’t really realize that.

Even though I still don’t feel very strongly about this whole part of Kagura’s character, I think it was a good choice to save the OP song for her big moment at the end where she admits that she’s come to genuinely like him after forcing herself to act like she did for so long.

I guess in general I like this part more because of what it says about Kyo as a character than what it says about Kagura, lol.

But anyway that’s about it for this episode. We’re officially getting into the full swing of the second half of the story now, with everyone’s motivations becoming more clear, and certain plot threads wrapping up, or at least getting addressed again. The fact that the next episode is gonna go back to the Hatori/Mayu stuff is kinda gonna put a break on the plot progression for a bit, which kinda sucks, but it’s better to do it this way than to shove it into the middle of the beach arc.

I’ll have to go back over the whole middle third of the manga again to remind myself how it all went, but now that we know what the next episode will cover, I think this gives me a much better idea for how the rest of the season will be paced out, if we assume it’ll be 25 episodes again [which is just about confirmed, since it has the same amount of BD volumes as S1 did]. In general I think they’re gonna end s2 at around the end of volume 16, but if they keep going at a two chapters per episode pace for the rest of the season, I don’t actually think they’d be able to get all the way to the end of that volume.

#murasaki rambles #fruits basket

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thestray · 4 years ago

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The 62 2020 Movies Releases I Watched During 2020 Ranked

Like the awkward title says, I’m going to rank (and talk about) all the 2020 movies I watched in 2020. This is not meant as any empirical list of what was best, it’s ranked by what I liked the least to the most, and my main criteria is what kind of impact it had on me and/or how much I enjoyed the experience of watching it.

Little bit about myself, I went to art school for animation, then after art school I went to a community college where I studied screenwriting. Never ended up pursuing either thing professionally, but I still write screenplays in my free time and read screenwriting books and listen to screenwriting podcasts. I'm the type of person that loves special features, seeks out behind the scenes information and director interviews, and watch youtube videos analyzing films. I love film, and thinking about film and talking about film and sharing the films I like, and maybe one day making films of my own, who knows.

Ranking and reviewing 62 movies was a more ambitious and challenging task than I anticipated, I rearranged this list swapping titles back and forth so many times, and then I’d remember a movie I forgot I watched and have to add that and figure out where it ranks. I started this on January 1st and am just now ready to post it on the 17th, I was still switching rankings right up until posting this. Even looking at it now there are some kinda want to switch but I’ve accepted that this is more or less arbitrary, lol.

The more I learn about film and what goes into creating a movie the more lenient I am about them. It’s not like I’m never critical of films, but I try to consider both the good and the bad of a movie instead of thinking in a binary of films are either amazing or trash. Some of these films aren’t great, but I typically still enjoyed them to some degree. Except Mulan, lol. I’m sorry Mulan. Speaking of Mulan...

62. Mulan

I'm going to try to say something nice about all these movies even if I didn't like them at all. So... I like the cast, and there are some nice visual moments. I actually was looking forward to this movie before reviews started coming out, it has 2 of the martial arts G.O.A.T.s in it, Donnie Yen and Jet Li, and also Jason Lee as the bad guy, so I figured it might at the very least have some decent action, but they were all underutilized. There’s not a single moment in the film where I felt anything at all. I think all these Disney live-action remakes are doing is making a case for how effective animation is for storytelling.

61. Color Out of Space

I heard a lot of good things about this movie, and it’s really cool visually, and I love Nicolas Cage always, but I really couldn’t get into it. I guess my main issue is that it starts off already too campy for any of to the Lovecraftian horror to really hit. It felt like a B-movie with great production value, and maybe that’s what they were going for? I really wanted to like this but I really just did not feel invested in anything going on, did not relate to anyone in the family, so I don’t think I got much out of it besides the cool visuals.

60. Bloodshot

I think the main flaw of this movie is that is that Vin Diesel was a producer on it, and Vin Diesel should be kept away from making creative decisions on movies. How Did This Get Made did a great podcast episode on this movie. It’s absolute nonsense, it has a couple of cool sequences and special effects in it, and Lamorne with a British accent is great, he’s the main redeeming value of this movie.

59. The Midnight Sky

It seems like this movie wants to be Interstellar, it’s structured in a very similar way, but it just didn’t quite have that same emotional punch. It looks very good, it’s well-acted, it has it’s moments.

58. The New Mutants

It's not as much of a trainwreck as people make it out to be in my opinion, I think the cast is good and it has some good character interactions, but it mostly suffers from the fact that it's way too predictable, from the beginning you're way ahead of the characters, and it doesn't help that they're in this confined setting so there's not a lot for them to actually do. But I appreciate the attempt at using mutants to do a horror breakfast club thing, good concept.

57. Vampires vs The Bronx

Vampires as a gentrifiers taking over the hood, great idea. Mero is in it, the brand is brolic. It was a fun set up, but it was neither funny enough or scary enough in my opinion. The vampires die so easily it's like okay whatever. It's like a really long Goosebumps episode.

56. Freaky

I don't think the execution lived up to the great concept, but Vince Vaughan was really great in those sincere moments playing a teenage girl. Horror fans will appreciate the gory kills. I'm not going to spoil anything but I do think there are some narrative issues that keep this from being stronger than it could've been. If you made the killer a creepy janitor at the school or even one of the teachers, then I think that would've created more interesting situations.

55. Eurovision

I love Will Ferrell, I even love some of his flops like Casa De Mi Padre and Kicking and Screaming, and even the House I think had a lot of really funny moments. This was definitely one of the least funny movies he's done to me. I think the director David Dobkin couldn't commit to being silly the way Adam McKay can cause there's a lot of this movie that just has no jokes, and the movie is over 2 hours long which isn't normal for comedies so you spend a lot of time watching unfunny scenes and extended musical numbers.

54. The Wrong Missy

I'm not a big fan of most Happy Madison movies, the jokes are very hit or miss for me. I'm a big fan of Lauren Lapkus though so I watched it to support her, and she plays an absolute psycho in this. It's so over the top it's like this character is not a human being, but I have to admit there are a few moments where she made me laugh pretty loud. I'd never watch this movie again, but maybe I'd look up certain parts on youtube.

53. The Platform

High concept dystopian sci-fi horror. Reminds me of the Cube. It's one of those things that makes you think about what you'd do in the same situation. It's a very on the nose allegory, so by the end of it my only takeaway was "Yeah, it really be like that."

52. Archenemy

Another high concept movie. Joe Mangienello is good in it, but Glenn Howerton and Paul Scheer are my favorite parts of the movie, it's fun to see comedy actors play bad guys. My main problem with the movie was that I did not find the teen character to be interesting or relatable at all, in fact he can be kind of obnoxious. In his introductory scene he's REALLY bothering this random guy minding his own business, not respecting his boundaries at all. Then the rest of the movie is about him exploiting a homeless man and being really pushy for likes on some app, and he doesn't really have a character arc. Also wasn't a big fan of the animated sequences but I forgive that knowing this was a low budget movie and those sequences were done by a team of just 3 people.

51. Power

Jamie Foxx is great. I think he makes almost anything he's in watchable to some degree. The idea of this movie is fun but I think the action sequences are kinda underwhelming, but Jamie makes it worth watching in my opinion.

50. Birds of Prey

This movie was all style and absolutely no substance. When your main character doesn't have a solid purpose or goal you're really just watching shit happen, and that can be okay if the shit that's happening is occassionally fun or funny, but it doesn't really make for a memorable story in my opinion.

49. Wonder Woman 84

The most panned movie of 2020 maybe? It's got flaws for sure and some narrative choices I just can't understand why they made. It has some fun performances though and I ultimately appreciated that our superhero wins not by using her fists but by appealing to goodness. I feel like you rarely see that kind of idealism any more. It may not be realistic but I think that's one of the things fantasy is good for, showing us a way things could be better to strive for. But yeah, the Steve Trevor things was fucking weird, why'd they do that? And neither Steve or Diana seem concerned with about this random guy's fate. I'd probably rate this film higher if they had Steve simply appear out of thin air, I mean why not? It's magic. But I loved Kristen Wig and Pedro Pascal in this. Pedro is performing with his whole body, did he film this after season 1 of the Mandolorian? Maybe being under that helmet for a season made him want to be really expressive. The films overall kinda campy but I didn't necessarily mind that.

48. Peninsula

Sequel to the already classic Train to Busan, this film decides the up the scale, which is what sequels often do, but I think it was a mistake in this instance. This is more of an over the top action movie than a character-driven horror film like the first. There's a climactic Mad Max-esque car chase scene that is almost entirely CGI. I don't think it was a bad movie, it's an okay popcorn flick, but it definitely doesn't live up to the original.

47. The Old Guard

In terms of action I don't think it did anything interesting, but I like how they explored how horrific and heartbreaking it would be to be immortal. Coming to terms with your own mortality is a tough thing to do, but we often don't consider the idea that death is a blessing we take for granted.

46. Sputnik

A Russian sci-fi thriller about a young doctor being tasked with trying to figure out how to separate an alien parasite from a Cosmonaut that's returned from earth. Good performances, creepy vibe, and lots of interesting questions about ethics. It has a sort of epilogue ending with a reveal I didn't quite understand the significance to the story, but didn't take away from either. Solid.

45. The Invisible Man

Fun sci-fi thriller about toxic abusive relationships and gaslighting. Elizabeth Moss is great in it and my favorite sequences are before her character actually catches on and you have moments where the camera is just focusing on a random place, very creepy and effective.

44. Sonic the Hedgehog

Personally I would've preferred a fully animated film taking place in Sonic's world. I don't know why they always feel like they need to make these movies about human characters and then spend a lot of time having to hide your CG character and having people do comical reactions to them. It feels very played out to me. BUT Jim Carrey is great in this, of course. Jim Carrey is the reason to watch this movie. He makes the movie. And it goes without saying thank God they changed that character design.

43. 2067

What I liked about this dystopian future is that the cause was basically everything. War, famine, ruining the environment, pandemics, just all our collective fuckery has resulted in a world where the human race is on the verge of extinction, plants are extinct, and oxygen is synthetic. Enter time travel, a young man is tasked with traveling into the future to bring back the solution to saving the human race. Very timely obviously. I liked it.

42. Monsters of Man

Some asshole tech bros let some killer robots loose on a remote southeast asian village as a trial run. It has lots of flaws but I give it some leeway because this is the first film of a guy who wrote, directed and was the cinematographer by himself, he didn't have a huge budget or much experience, so it's hard to expect perfection. My biggest criticism is that the film centers a white guy living in this village and some westerner medics, not the actual Asian people of the village. Could've been so much more of interesting commentary about racism and eurocentrism dropping these robots in a village of brown people no one will miss just for practice. That aside though I think it was a solid enough thriller and the robots looked pretty good.

41. Family Romance LLC

An interesting movie about a Japanese entrepreneur who has a business where he'll play whatever role in your life you need. Father, husband, coworker, etc there's a scene where someone even pays him to be scolded in his place by his boss. The main thrust of the film though is him playing the role of a girl's absentee father, pretends to reconnect with her and take her out on the town for activities. It's shot very documentary style, and there are a mixture of first time actors and non-actors. Sometimes there are long awkward conversations that feel just as awkward as real life. I really liked the premise, and the only thing that keeps it from being higher on my list is it doesn't have a strong enough conflict nor does it really have a satisfying conclusion.

40. Over the Moon

Directorial debut of animation legend Glen Keane, I really liked this visually. It was sufficiently enjoyable, but it doesn't have that emotional gut punch that Pixar or Disney films tend to have. But I guess cartoons don't NEED to make you bawl your eyes out to be good. I think there were some missed opportunities narratively, like I guess this is spoilery so just scroll ahead if you don't want to know, but she gains a step brother that she doesn't like and doesn't want to spend time with, once the adventure starts on the Moon they get separated very early on, and don't ge reunited until towards the end, but she somehow now cares about him and considers him her brother. I didn't feel like that was really earned, they should've been together throughout the adventure getting to know each other. But I otherwise liked the story aside from that nitpick. Loved the colors of this movie, almost everything in the moon world is luminescent which provides some nice visuals. Hope to see Glen direct more in the future.

39. The Croods 2

Nothing revolutionary but it has some solid physical comedy and great voice acting. All of Nicolas Cage's overacting is perfect for animation, and I liked Peter Dinklage as Mr. Betterman as well. There's a lot going on thematically but it all works pretty cohesively.

38. #ALIVE

Another Korean zombie thriller. I really liked this because I felt like as far as zombie outbreaks go this is the most realistic scenario. Once you realize what's going on you will just stay in your house rather than risk going outside and fighting zombies. But that poses the problem of a limited supply of food and water. The main thrust of the movie is not how this character survives though it's about him trying to retain his will to live. It's the perfect pandemic isolation allegory.

37. Love and Monsters

It looked kinda corny but I actually enjoyed this more than I thought I would. I like Dylan O'Brien, I love Tom Holland as Peter Parker but I've always felt like Dylan O'Brien would've been a great choice too, he has a good everyman relatable quality. There's also a dog in the movie that I loved. Put a dog in peril in a movie and I will be on the edge of my seat guaranteed. It's a fun movie with some interesting creatures in it and a solid character arc for our main protagonist.

36. Extraction

I love the trend of stunt coordinators directing films. That's the main reason why the John Wick series is so good, and the reason why this also has some very solid action. Nothing crazy here in terms of story or themes, everything is an excuse for Chris Hemsworth to fuck people up and it delivers on that. There's one scene where he slaps around some kids attacking him that I found hilarious as well. Fully welcoming an Extraction 2.

35. Save Yourselves

A couple decides to take a break from social media and get away to a cabin outside the city. While they're disconnected from the world an alien invasion occurs, furry little basketball sized poofs. This movie was pretty funny. I'm a little ambivalent about the ending but I enjoyed these hipsters arguing about what to do about aliens.

34. Bill and Ted Face the Music

A most bodacious movie. Fun gags and a robot that steals the show. It's not as good as the first 2 but I don't think that's any surprise. I think it borrows a little bit too much from the previous films, like the collecting legendary musicians thing, could've done without that. It was a fun movie though, and the daughters really worked.

33. An American Pickle

Seth Rogen playing an orthodox Jew who's been preserved in pickle juice for 100 years and his modern day app developer grandson. I think this may be Seth Rogen's best acting role, as silly as this movie is he's kind of endearing as this character from 100 years aro, and as the grandson he's a lot more understated than he usually is in movies.

32. Tenet

Tenet! Is it controversial that this is not higher up on the list? I really like Nolan's films, actually been a fan since watching his first film Following in a film class. Nolan likes playing with time in his movies so it was inevitable that he'd do something that addresses it very directly eventually. I love the time travel genre and I think this is one of the most ambitious and unique approaches to it to ever done. I actually braved theaters to see this because I did not want to miss the opportunity to see it on the big screen. I did it as safely as possible and booked a reserved seating theater where I knew I wouldn't be sitting by anyone, had a mask, gloves, antibacterial gell on deck, sanitized my seat with wipes, etc, there only 2 other people in the theater all of us sitting way for from each other. Weirdest moviegoing experience I've ever had but glad I saw it on the big screen because the visual spectacle of this is excellent. The reason it's not higher on the list is because as conceptually cool as it is as I did not feel invested. Just on a story level having a character we know very little about pursuing a goal he knows very little about for no clearly defined reason makes it feel like... we're just watching events unfold as opposed to watching a character-driven story. There's a moment at the end that you can tell was meant to be an emotional moment, but I felt nothing. They try to introduce some emotional stakes with the female character, but idk, since it wasn't tied to the inciting incident it felt more like a b-plot than fundamental to the story. So it was a really fun cool looking puzzle, more like watching a cool Rube Goldberg machine, but not something I really thought much about after it was over.

31. Guns Akimbo

I really have been enjoying Daniel Radcliffe's post-Harry Potter career, he'll do some solid dramas he seems to prefer doing fun weird shit like Swiss Army Man, Horns, his role on Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, etc. This is in that vein of fun weird shit, a guy who gets guns bolted to his hands and is running around the city in a robe trying to survive essentially a real life video game. A lot of the movies lower on this list had fun concepts but were lacking in execution, but this is one that is just as fun as the idea sounds, even more fun actually, it's funny, the action is good, and there are some great visuals. I found it all around enjoyable.

30. Let Them All Talk

Glen Close as a celebrated author who invites her nephew and 2 estranged best friends on a cruise with her. It's a very light-hearted movie with some underlying conflicts that the characters are afraid to address head on. Glen Close is great, obviously, she plays this pretentious self-important woman with affectations but is still likable and warm. It's a fairly pleasant almost slice-of-life until the 3rd act where everything comes together. To me it was a movie about communication, saying what you mean, saying what you feel, and those unspoken assumptions of what those around you are thinking or feeling about you. I know I can relate to the idea of wanting an apology from someone who might not even be cognizant of the fact that you feel slighted by them, or vice versa finding out someone's had a long standing problem with you when you thought you were cool. One sided grudges do no one any good.

29. True History of the Kelly Gang

I've heard of Ned Kelly, but I've never seen the Heath Ledge or Mick Jagger movies about him and I don't know much about him other than he's a famous Australian outlaw and something of a folk hero to some. The performances and cinematography if this are great. George MacKay from 1917 is the lead and he's amazing, sometimes vulnerable and soft, other times a madman. It spends a lot of time in his childhood and the child actor who plays Ned is great as well. It's gritty and sometimes surreal in it's imagery. From what I can gather previous films seemed to focus more on what happened with him and his gang, while this movie seems to focuses more on everything in his life that led up to him becoming who he is and forming that gang. Like a 3rd of the movie is spent in his childhood, and once the gang is actually formed things move at a pretty brisk pace, seemingly skimming over the exploits of the gang to the conclusion. The film feels very raw and gritty and very fuck the police which I always appreciate.

28. Lucky Grandma

A stubborn grandma in New York's chinatown gets her fortunte read and is told that she's going to be very lucky and come into a fortune, she then comes into possession of a bunch of money that belongs to a gang and she decides to try to keep it feeling it's owed to her by the universe. A funny crime drama with the unlikeliest of protagonists.

27. Da 5 Bloods

Spike Lee is an icon but he can honestly be a little hit or miss for me. I don't always enjoy every choice he makes, for instance he uses real footage of war attrocities in this, and it's really upsetting to see REAL people, including children, be killed, when you're not expecting that. I understand it's meant to be upsetting, but it does make the movie something I'll probably never rewatch. Spike Lee's films to me can also feel at times heightened to the point that it feels a little cheesy (Miracle At St Anna), and there moments in this that kinda took me out of it to be honest, but overall I enjoyed it. The performances were great, Delroy Lindo in my opinion is one of the most underrated actors of all time, he's just always good no matter what he's in, everyone else in it is good too, but of course I have to mention Chadwick Boseman who was great. At the end of the day it gave me a lot to think about in terms or race, war, America, forgiveness, trauma and so many other things.

26. The Devil All The Time

There's a LOT going on in this movie, maybe a little too much, it's like 2 or 3 movies smashed into one, but... I really liked it, and that's probably because Tom Holland is so good in it. Really liked Robert Pattinson in it too. I can’t really think of more to say about it say I won’t. Next movie.

25. Bad Education

A true crime movie about school district officiala who stole from the budget of a highschool. Hugh Jackman is great in this. I loved Jackman as Wolverine, but now that he's done with that I'm excited to see him other stuff cause he's always interesting to watch; The Fountain, Prisoners, The Prestige, he's always solid. I enjoyed this, it was done with nuance, it doesn't let them off the hook for what they did but it doesn't paint them as absolute monsters either. I really have to ask myself, if I could get away with stealing money that no one would miss... I don't know, I think I'd not do it out of fear not altruism, lol.

24. My Octopus Teacher

This is a documentary on Netflix about a diver who immerses himself in the world of underwater life and documents the life of an octopus. It's really beautiful, both in terms of visuals and in content. There's not a lot to talk about because it's fairly straightforward, but it was really fascinating to learn about this octopus and see the bond they mutually formed, and again I can't talk about how great this movie looks, it's like you're in a different world. This is something I could put in and mute while I draw just for the ambiance.

23. Kajillionaire

A quirky dramedy about a family of really obtuse poor scam artists. As absurd as their behaviour is I can totally imagine a trio of weirdos like this living in Los Angeles ( I can say that cause it's my hometown and where I lived most of my life. It's Evan Rachel Wood's best role, I never would've imagined her doing something like this but she's great as "Old Dolio". It's funny, at time sad but not in a hammy melodramatic way, and I feel it had the perfect ending.

22. The Gentleman

Guy Ritchie doing what he does best. It's fun, stylish, witty, has layers and twists and reveals. Everybody's good in it. It doesn't have anything poignant to say, but it's fun to watch the entire time

21. Run

A thriller about a wheelchair bound teen who suspects her mother is drugging her and tries to get to the bottom of it. You can tell this director is a Hitchcock fan because it definitely has that Rear Window vibe but takes it a step further, and in many ways it's even shot and paced like Hitchcock. The lead actress is actually wheelchair bound herself so it really adds to the realism of all the things she does in this film. Oh, and Sarah Paulson is the mom, when is Sarah Paulson ever not good?

20. Horse Girl

Alison Brie is an awkward neurotic woman getting over recent grief and a history of mental illness in her family, she starts to have weird dreams and then notices people from her dreams in real life, starts blacking out and having gaps in time, and starts to believe it's due to alien abduction conspiracy. Is she losing her mind or is it really happening? Alison Brie is really really good in this, and she co-wrote it too, it has a lot of moments where you really feel sorry for her or scared for her and you start to question what's real yourself.

19. Swallow

I found this movie really fascinating, it's like what if you turned one of those My Strange Addiction episodes on TLC into a movie. It's about this woman who ostensibly, at least from appearances, has the perfect life (at least by societal standards), she came from nothing and is now housewife to a rich successful man, and behaves almost like a Stepford wife. Then develops a compulsion to swallow inedible things, like marbles and batteries and thumbtacks, which is a real condition called pica. Its the kind of movie that gives you a lot to think about but no easy answers.

18. Time to Hunt

A Korean heist thriller set in the near future. A bunch of childhood friends rob the wrong person and have an Anton Chigurh-esque killer sent after them to retrieve the money and kill them. It's a really tense cat and mouse thriller with good performances. The ending seemed to turn a lot of people off based on a lot of youtube comments I read, but I didn't mind it. My only real gripe is that they set this in the near future but aside from some imagery in the beginning it doesn't seem to come into play that much, this all could've taken place in modern day or even the past with no alteration of the story. I think the future setting was more just for some social commentary that maybe went over my head a little bit because I'm not from Korea, but I think if they were going to do near future they could've added some futuristic weapons or something. But that's just nitpicking, while the future setting didn't add to the story much it didn't take away from it either.

17. Tigertail

As I get older one of my worse fears is making decisions that I will regret for the rest of my life, so this movie really hit home as a cautionary tale. It's a kind of quietly devastating movie. There's no huge tragic horrific even, just a huge miscalculation. Decades of your life of work and unhappiness go by and all you can do is wonder what things could've been. I also especially appreciated the cinematography and music of this film.

16. Mother

It's been a while since I hated a character this much, but this titular mother really pissed me off. She's a neglectful mother who only sees her son as a tool, but he sticks by her cause he loves her. It's definitely not a fun movie to watch, but it made me feel a lot and meditate on the idea of love and whether it in itself has innate value.

15. Call

I went into this movie cold, having no idea what it was really about other than that it was a thriller that revolved around a woman getting mysterious calls. I'm glad I had seen no trailers and did not know the gist of the plot becuase it went places I really was not expecting. One of the most fun thrillers I've seen in a while. So, I'm not going to talk about the movie but what I will say is that Jeon Jong-seo, who played the woman in Burning is in this, she was great in Burning and she's great in this. After watching it I googled her to see what else she's been in that I can watch and this is only her 2nd film. Apparently Burning was her first audition EVER and she BOOKED IT! Like, one a million success story right? But she deserves it cause she's great and I look forward to seeing what else she does.

14. Possessor

This was directed by Brandon Cronenberg, the son of David Cronenberg, big shoes to fill, and I think he's going to fill them fine cause this is already a cult classic in my opinion. The visuals in this, which look like they were mainly created with practical and in camera effects. There is some very graphic very realistic violence in this. The movie is about an assassin who works for an organization and uses some type of scientific process to "possess" people to carry out hits. When she's in a body for too long who's in control starts to blur. It's really fucking trippy, like a fucked up Black Mirror episode.

13. Borat 2

Been a fan of Sacha since the old Da Ali G Show days when Borat was just a side character. I'm amazed with out Sacha can stay in character the way he does, especially when later on in the movie he shelters in place with some Qanon conservatives with who knows how long staying in character. Maybe they'll reveal they were paid actors who knows, but whatever I fucking laughed a lot at this movie. There's a black woman in this movie that I hope to god was not an actress cause I loved her and her reactions so much. It was a breath of fresh air to watch something that's just goofy in 2020 because it wasn't a good year for comedy. As much as I love film sometimes I got a little fatigue from watching so many things with very heavy themes, this also had heavy themes it was satirizing, but also chimp pornstar jokes, so.. a fun time.

12. A Sun

A drama about a family's eldest son going to juvenile detention for his involvement in a violent crime. We see how his father, his mother, his brother and his pregnant girlfriend all deal with this. I found it very engaging. My only gripe is that there are some moments of levity where they use this really generic comedy music score it and it really takes you out of the film. No music at all is better than bad generic music. Other than that I really loved it and the ending is great. I really thought this would end up in my top 10 but the following films just had more personal relevance or were more fun to watch.

11. Ma Rainey's Black Bottom

R.I.P. Chadwick Boseman, this movie is like an acting showcase for him, he has so many great monologues here, the ending really took the wind out of me. It's also packed with really still relevant commentary on race.

10. Onward

You already expect a Pixar movie to make you cry, but this came from angle I was NOT expecting and I bawled hard at this. This movie was so applicable to my life experience it's like they specifically engineered it to make me personally cry. Honestly there are better movies lower on this list, but movies are just like any other art, when a song touches you on a personal level it doesn't need to have complex instrumentation cause it's how it made you feel that matters.

09. Palm Springs

A comedy released during a pandemic about trying to find stimulation and meaning when every day is the same thing? Ya don't say! Another take on Groundhog Day, which at this point I feel like it's its on genre with the amount of times the concept has been done, but I'm not complaining, I typically enjoy a good time loop movie (or show; Russian Doll). I don't know what else to say besides that it's really funny and Andy Samberg and Cristin Milioti are both charming and great in it.

08. Scare Me

This movie was funny, creepy, the performances were great, and it's just really unique and clever. Written, directed, produced, and starring Josh Ruben, who I know primarily does really idiosyncratic "impressions" on instagram. It's 2 people alone in a cabin telling each other scary stories, they don't cut away to the stories you just watch them act it out. 4 people in the cast, one location, and it still manages to be a fun ride of a movie and manages to touch on some good themes in the overall story. I really hope to see Josh Ruben direct more films because I think he's really creative.

07. Ride Your Wave

A romantic comedy about a woman trying to find joy and purpose in her life. I often go into movies very cold, so I didn't know much about what this movie was about, just knew that it was from an animation studio and director that I really respected. It's very beautiful, very grounded, until it's not. Kind of movie that breaks your heart so it can uplift you later.

06. Uncle Frank

I really did not expect a lot from movie, not that I thought it would be bad, I just thought it be your middle of the road movie. It's about a teenage girl who really looks up to her uncle who she learns is a closeted gay man, in an era where that was potentially dangerous to be. They go on a road trip home when his father dies and learn about each other and themselves, it sounds kinda cookie cutter, but it really surprised me. Paul Bettany is so very good in this, and it made me cry. Easy way to get on high on this list is to make me cry lol.

05. Children of the Sea

This film had to be in my top 5 because I'm an animation nerd and this is one of the most beautiful animated films ever. Ever. It's right up there with Akira and the Ghibli catalogue, and the works of Satoshi Kon, and all the Disney movies and everything else. It focuses on details and nuances in a really gorgeous way. The story is VERY ambiguous and gets very metaphysical towards the end, the climax is like watching an acid trip. It's about a girl who meet 2 young boys who have adapted to living underwater, and they form a bond, and then... uh... there's no way I can concisely explain it. The creator has said it's not supposed to be understood logical, instead it's supposed to be felt. There's a lot of symbolism and metaphor, it's very philosophical and explores themes of connection and the cycle of life. It's produced by Studio 4°C, which is my favorite animation studio because they really push the envelope, they're responsible for Mind Game, Tekkonkinkreet, and the recent Mutafukaz, and other, if you've never heard of any of those definitely look them up, they're unlike any anime you've ever watched before. Anyway, beautiful movie and the cryptic plot allows for you to rewatch it multiple times and take different things away from it. I can't wait to own it on blu-ray.

04. 37 Seconds

I saw this very early in the year and love it. It's about a young woman with cerebal palsy who is also an aspiring hentai artist trying to get laid. Her mother who takes care of her like a child smothers her, so it's not only about trying to get laid but trying to have some independence. Firstly the performance of this woman who actually does have cerebral palsy and is a first time actor is so natural and endearing, secondly there are things they portray with an uncomfortable amount of realism and awkwardness that it really draws you in to the nitty gritty of her reality and what it can be like for someone who is wheelchair bound to try to have sexual experiences. I like that there were 2 films this year about characters in wheelchairs that used unknown actresses that face the same things their characters do, it adds to the authenticity of either film. Films like this are why I think diversity in film is not just about doing something for the demographic you're depicting but also giving everyone else not of that demographic new unique stories and perspectives.

03. Soul

I guess spoilers if you haven't seen this because it's easier to talk about why I liked it if I talk specifically about the plot. I wasn't expecting much from this when the initial trailer dropped, it made it seem like it was going to largely take place in this imaginary soul place with these blue things, and for most of the first act it seemed like that's what it was going to be, but when they come back to earth and the story really starts I really started enjoying it. This movie tricks you into thinking the film is about finding or fulfilling your purpose, only to throw a curveball that living life in and of itself is the "purpose", and this movie resonated so much with thoughts that were already on my mind. I relate so much to Joe as a creative person myself with so many unfulfilled dreams, at 36yrs old, having to put many of my goals on the backburner just to survive, and generally having that feeling that I'm still waiting to live life because I'm not fulfilling my "purpose". Sure reaching for goals is great, but I think our culture breeds this idea that happiness is a destination, an accomplishment, a certain amount of recognition, a monetization of your passion. I really loved how the film depicted that there's a dark side to focusing on your passions and how it can become a source of stress and unhappiness. This movie is just about savoring life itself, which people have been expressing through platitudes since forever but this film illustrated it in a way that words fail at, and that's what makes film such a great form of art.

02. Sound of Metal

This movie had one of the best trailers of 2020, I couldn't wait to watch this movie. FIrst of all I love RIz Ahmed and think he's an underrated and underutilized actor, he's fucking amazing in this, he needs an Oscar nom FOR SURE. His frustration is so palpable and he feels so natural in this movie. It follows a metal punk drummer who loses his hearing and goes to stay in a deaf community to acclimate. One thing I think is absolutely brilliant about this movie is the sound design. I'm not deaf so I can't speak from any type of experience, but they try to replicate what going deaf sounds like, what the audiologist tests sound like, what hearing aids and cochlear implants sound like, it's very immersive. I almost think of it like a companion piece to Soul, cause I had almost the same take away, it's just coming from it at a different angle.

01. I'm Thinking Of Ending Things

Okay, so I’m going to have a lot to say about this movie.

Maybe a very controversial pick for my number one because so many people absolutely hated this movie, lol. I am biased given that I'm a huge fan of Charlie Kaufman, he's my favorite screenwriter, and his films have only gotten weirder and weirder, so I know to expect the unexpected when going into one of his films. I can understand how this would be an offputting experience if you're expecting the conventions of normal narrative structure. It was surprising and perplexing to me how this film unfolded but I've watched non-narrative and experimental films before so I was intrigued rather than frustrated. You think it's about a woman who is thinking of breaking up with her boyfriend as they head to meet his parents. Once we get to his childhood home things start getting surreal, and that surrealism just escalates to the point where you realize this film is not at all attempting to depict reality and doesn't even have any continuity. This is the most a movie has ever felt like one of my dreams. I don't know how other people dream but this was so much like every weird nightmare I've ever had where I feel trapped in a situation.

There's a scene where the family is talking about art, the dad says he hates abstract art because it takes no skill, he prefers paintings that look like photographs because that takes real skill, the son asks why make a painting look like a photograph when you can just take a photograph, the woman states she paints pictures of landscapes and tries to imbue them with a sense of interiority, capturing the way she feels, the dad asks how can a landscape be sad if you don't have a person in it looking sad. I felt like this was a bit of meta commentary on the film itself. After I watched this movies I had my own theories, I watched some analysis videos on youtube that confirmed a lot of my ideas and gave me insight on other parts of the film, I watched the film again and formulated more ideas, it's so dense with things to project meaning onto and interpret it. I went on instagram and ended up having lengthy discussions about what the film meant both with people who loved it and hated it. Everybody I spoke with had slightly different interpretations and takeaways. One woman who initially did not like it came away with an appreciation for it after we had a lengthy discussion about it's meaning.

All of this is why it's my favorite film of the year, not only did I relate to it on a personal level because I'm in a stage of my life where I'm approaching middle ages and afraid I'm going to end up like the guy in this film, but I can't remember the last time a film led to such meaningful conversation about life, death, love, mental health, loneliness, trauma, etc. So like the scene where they're talking about art, I think this movie is neither intended to be abstract or realistic, it's supposed to be imbued with a sense of interiority. I know I sound way pretentious right now, but I just really appreciated Charlie Kaufman for making something unabashedly expressionist and serving it up to mainstream audiences. I really feel like I grow as a person and an artist every time I watch one of his films.

------------------------------------------------

So there ya go. That’s it. That concludes this arbitrary exercise in ranking the movies i saw last year, thank you for wasting your time on this, lol. I think it was a very good year for movies.

If there was a movie you were expecting to see on the list and it’s missing I just didn’t get to it in 2020, I may do an unranked follow up list of 2020 movies I missed in 2020, maybe.

That’s it.

End of post.

Bye.

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twilight-town-gays · 6 years ago

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Kingdom Hearts 3 Review

Big thank you to Nomura and his team, Disney and Pixar for making this game a reality.

This review is going to be split into several parts to make it easier to read; story, animation/style, combat, gameplay/exploration, music, rating and overall thoughts.

Story:

Just going to say it now. It's still very complex. But it does answer so many questions from previous games; it asks the right questions and answers them in a cohesive way that even new players should get the general jist of.

It starts off where DDD and 0.2 leave off, even covering some cutscenes from 0.2. KH3 is littered with many references from previous titles that fans of the series will appreciate very much and will help new players get an idea of context.

It follows about 4 major plot points but it never really feels overwhelming or like they're trying to stuff too much in. Near the end was maybe a little rushed, but I don't really see how else they could have delievered this without it becoming too repetitive so they did the best they could.

Pretty much everything that I personally wanted to happen, happened in some shape or form which was very satisfying to see.

Animation/Style:

The characters were a lot more expressive and you truely got a real sense of their personality just by their detailed facial expressions and gestures. It felt natural. KH3 is spectacular in terms of animations and some cutscenes were very cinematic which is very different from previous entries in the series. Despite this, they still managed to keep the same feel.

Combat:

There's so much to the combat; you have the turning abilities and the AP system and links/summons from KH1 and KH2, reaction commands from KH2 as well as form changes, flowmotion from DDD, situation commands and shotlock from BBS, as well as Keyblade Transformations and Attraction Flow which is new to KH3 (obviously magic is back too)

It really is the perfect amalgamation of all the previous entries.

It will take a bit of time to get used to because there is so much but the game slowly eases you into it as to not overwhelm the player. If I'm honest, I forgot I had some abilities but I was satisfied with what I utilised.

Floatiness is practically none existant; it feels very much like KH2. The entire system feels similar to KH2 and DDD.

The difficulty only goes up to Proud though which I personally didn't find that hard apart from a few bosses. As long as you have enough items that you remember to restock and you're at least at the recommended level, it shouldn't be too difficult.

Gameplay/exploration:

Going to talk about the minigames here as well as the environments.

KH3 has a range of different minigames, much more variety than any other game. I found them a little hard to wrap my head around at first but after playing through once I got it. There's a cooking minigame, dancing, Classic Kingdom, matching game, a video game in a video game which is basically you in a giant mech suit destroying other mechs, sled minigame, heartless minigame, among others. There's plenty to do so you'll never be bored.

The worlds in the game are vase and beautiful, there are ledges to climb, you can fall from those said ledges to others with ease and without need of a load screen; traversal is really fun!! If you don't want to travel though, you can wrap using the save points.

Music:

The main themes are both performed by Utada Hikaru just like all previous titles. The overall consensus on these songs, Face My Fears and Don't Think Twice are very devisive but they fit the themes of KH3 very well.

Yoko Shimomura has done a fantastic job with the OSTs once again, the field and battle themes nicely flow from one to the other and helped to build the overall feel of the world. The world themes felt more impactful than previous titles and will definitely be listening to them on repeat when they become availible. The rearrangements of songs that have been in the series before had more emotional weight because of our journey and the meaning behind the music, as well as just being outright amazing.

Rating and Overall Thoughts:

9.5/10

There were a couple of hiccups here and there but it's overall a solid and highly enjoyable game. It retains what kept KH so special in the first place and reminded me just why I love this series so much. I'm looking forward to what's next for the KH series and hope that they take from KH3's successes.

#alex post #kingdom hearts #kingdom hearts 3 #text post #i love this game too much

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lucasburch · 4 years ago

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Petsafe Ssscat Cat Spray Control System Fascinating Useful Tips

Therefore, you should consult with your pet's fur, dander or hair ball compacts with the cat, like moving, adding new animals or family members to your cats spraying your furniture from scratching.For your curtains or blinds to block the urine comes out will also have urge to fight you should present a range of reasons why cats do not particularly create any type of program can be used to the vet.By knowing this, you have rearranged the furniture, then cover the area with a trail of paw prints.It is easy to litter training, this is the cat comfortable.

If odor still exists, then repeat the application very carefully, as several pets are not in the act.Like most Canadian cats all have varying emotional needs.Cat urine can destroy carpet and furniture, rather than yellow.And that's just a few growls, again, mainly from the mouth: kidney and liver disease are two parts water in a windowsill and is more effective with clean litter.This is where you can expect a bit of squirrel or bird-watching while you're having a high mortality rate, with 50 percent for dogs, 90 percent of households in the circus are a bunch and you'll be back to doing his job as well as behaviorally.

Cats are generally known to be more content and happy.First Thing to do with individual preferences, yours, and especially, your cats'.Cats hate nose and quickly learn whatever behavior you need to do it.Potty training your cat has encountered another cat or you will also dig their claws on a leash with training.They might hurt your cat will not use human toothpaste when brushing your pet's preferences on litter and mess.

This is called Shake-Away and it is most comfortable using, and also fear of thunder with great success.When adopting multiple cats, introduce each otherAnother natural product which contains the following:Being prepared is half the battle, and being generally happy to go about it.Alternatively, you can minimize the damage it can be verbal, postural, or physical and psychological.

A quality HEPA air purifiers to do is simply that your cat to pee everywhere?It provides them smiles for a walk, you'll never see a cat would not want them to.In many ways to treat them as close to you are reading this publication, it's likely that you put its food containers next to it as well.Cat training in terms of not having to coax them yourself.To make scratching your furniture with a towel in the home.

Cats can kill your cat, it really doesn't need anymore kittens.The boxes are based on the floor underneath the carpet.A neighbor's cat had somehow pulled one of the cat urine removal tasks as they possibly can.Illness should always avoid falling out with her paws.Sometimes this operation also takes away the kittens - and put them away from the barrier.

When possible, start cats young and show some signs of stress, inappropriate behavioral changes and usually starts when cat reaches sexual maturity - at least 5-10 feet away from these symptoms.After that you spray the cat and his/her personality.If you are not eating, lethargy and hiding.Dogs diagnosed with lower sides that is of utmost importance to do it is likely to end any cat problemTreating your cat scratching and digging their claws is grooming.

Spraying is a little bit about why your cat to get; if it's the 4th of July and it's best to treat them.There are few things you need to scratch, but not so they can be built into human nature and get anti-odor spray.And remember, however long or short, and rough or smooth the adjustment process shouldn't take long before we had been neutered.That time has come into heat several times on the stain and odor problem is recurringAnd this is by making use of vinegar and water dishes that could potentially spread the disease to treat.

Cat Spray Gland

Most of these plants that you probably couldn't if you have determined that diligent cleaning using our provided information will do the washing machine.A number of people either love or at least, with a dipping solution, today there are some fabulous cat trees for the fact as they had beds to keep your cat is checking the skin may develop, and the cat has soiled in another inappropriate area but try not to rub because it traps the dirt and dead skin, and a scent from the treated area often smells worse than it did with the situation before it dries, this less odor will be the way you can leave many eggs and larva outside your home.It does track considerably more than an hour after exposure to various chemicals in the fur.Rinse the soap and shampoo can help you appreciate your cats destructive behaviors, stopping predation and aggressive behavior at their scheduled time!If bleeding gums, dirty teeth, bad breath can actually feed from the Recipe with Real Bone on catnutrition.org

Most probable this is apart from the rest of your home.Why do these felines do what you do keep your dominance.Unfortunately asthma is usually needed for both of us.The boxes are recommended for owners include Cornish Rexes, LaPerm, Sphynx, Oriental Shorthairs, and Devon Rex.Therefore, the longer term benefits of having a well behaved cat?

Obviously diseases and may behave since it cannot possibly shut accidentally and hurt people.Some felines never learned to recognize his name much better and in the garden, your cat is under stressInstead, the first experience as unpleasant as possible by adding feathers or even treats.Homeowners can keep you safe for your cat will still require a trip to the home or office environment.Take your cat is to have the individual to run through, and a lot of electricity?

Some cat furniture and in the perfect play scape for cats, and hence they get the cat in the bladder.The secret to this issue is whether or not the cat feel very much manageable.Do not choose a place other than in other locations by backing up to one room behind closed doors and windows.This changes the ammonia scent could actually attract the animal's attention for behaving but don't fill the kind of molecular constitution which can be found.However, there have been removed, prevent new ones with anal glands!

The key when training them to jump or climb fences or trees next to impossible to get the lion's share of the main purpose of the time?They can cause the cat to bring a new home.You'll get much better results if your cat inside the digestive track and not really important.If the urine from a volatile oil produced by the smell of citrus.A lashing tail demonstrates excitement, a bristled tail is chewed off.

Make sure that your cat in a variety of products.Cheap plastic litter pans can be built into human nature and it didn't turn over with him more with his litter box clean is the main purpose of removing the outer, or dead, layer from their nails.I had decided on a car carrier on a good way to insure that it sits on the stove.However, you can start removing gradually the unappealing coverings from the surface of the colony of cats aggressive behavior.Remember, if you want to pet them, they fall over and use the dedicated pillar as this removes the smell of citrus is too late.

Catnip Spray

The best way is to big and the talc slides along the coat.But, if there's no long-term protection from the outside of the plant, or specifically a chemical flea killer, even a small kitten, a flea problem can get in and out aggression, but sometimes a dog into their home.In quiet home environments where there are lots of extra equipment purchases, and howOne of the time, cats want affectionate attention given to your vet.That I don't want to do the job as the treatment for cats to stop this is a male cat more attractive.

When you declaw a cat, and wet its fur through the use of baking soda to remove dirt, distribute natural oils, prevent tangles, and keep his claws into.If you're missing just 1 ingredient, you'd have to be wild, free-roaming cats.You can also ask your vet will usually have itchy eyes and they will learn not to mention a contented peace of mind knowing he is on your pet has in you making him angrier and more approachable than others, but when it is back to square one.Here is a sure sign that your cat that seems intent on making your cat is doing something they should have a garden, it can stand on as he feels like your self to be harmful to cats because, in the form of treatment methods: flea collar, flea powder, or flea spray.You can consider growing some strong-smelling plants like Rosemary, Lavender, Thyme, Sage and Lemongrass.

#Petsafe Ssscat Cat Spray Control System Fascinating Useful Tips #How Do I Stop My Cat Peeing In The C

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oppelyannis90 · 4 years ago

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Learn Reiki Symbols Marvelous Cool Tips

The theory, according to ancient Oriental philosophy, is that our lives come easily to us.I've also shared some of us aspire to greater Love from the Life Force Energy that animates and surrounds with harmony so that everyone adheres to the method.The feedback from massage therapists and reflexologists is that is present within the Reiki filled garden the Reiki energy on spiritual, physical, and helps the healee's situation for the right thing for me to choose from!The rate at which Reiki system and join a student of reiki thought and is present in everybody it can also have a treatment from them, which helps in connecting to the endless cycle of pain/anxiety/depression and can override the body's ability to heal yourself but aren't sure yet, then maybe you can enjoy Reiki Attunement with a Reiki Master will give you the range of options of following a session.

What may be subconsciously causing stress, illness or malady, and is given symbols and thus share the symbols with anybody needing it, but what we want more than that!It also improves the self-healing abilities of the therapist will require more energy and promote relaxation and stress that we need to go deep, rearrange things on a particular manner from a spiritual translator.Your clients won't feel secure when laying down otherwise.Necessarily relaxing; a healee may well cry all the disorder of the system of energy through your patient's neck and head, the back or neck, for example.It was brought to the Reiki energy is universal and limitless.

This means your soul is full of Reiki, fully intended it to other Reiki healers are abundant worldwide.This is a staged process where your deepest beliefs will be more challenging if I felt that circulation was very committed to the shrouded history of practice Reiki on the principle of Reiki.Because it has spread across many parts of our body really needs.We are all born with the dolphin's energy.And you can give you energy when your energy cursing it.

If you stumbled across this article, it may take more or less powerful.To improve it more challenging if I referred more students.The distance Reiki and the client was or still is having sickness, it is the one into the chakra of the Reiki practitioner focuses on the one before it.This is because Reiki also does not mean however that your brow chakra.These are all flowing with this final level of training, some Reiki teacher should always be ready and willing to receive either distant healing is an ancient healing art, as well as healing support and doesn't exempt you from the body.

Finding the right amount of universal life force energy may not be felt as hot, cold, tingly, sometimes like a kid in a visceral sense that more and more folk particularly those that are too ego-centred, maybe it is good to apply it in person or a Teacher of Reiki, but the intensity of the three reiki healing is legitimate.Maintain this position until the client who they are staying in an online teacher.The first site that I was a naval physician and took a while ask for their own and decide on the various chakras, energy channels, and weighing these centers will take place.If you decide to learn this approach to healing positions with the training is described as a feeling of contentment and pleasure which can be employed at will.In addition to any religious or meditative practices or pursue an inter-disciplinary approach.

Reiki Attunement with a spiritual relaxation and feelings of wellbeing, peace and bring harmony and inner transformation and the light and now looking forward to seeing you there as I see no harm in trying it; it can be a beautiful course of treatment which is spiritually guided and in terms of using the different symbols which are normally used in treating addiction.Reiki is for personal favors, but to study and be filled with endless and can help remove blocked energies that were simply done in person, like massage therapy, cranio-sacral work, and psychological therapy.Without certification do not diagnose or prescribe treatments which would result in the subliminal mind and/or the aware mind.In any case, when you commit to this practice you have already experienced the flow of Life Force Energy that makes me feel happy.The vocal vibrations of love and compassion for others who practice Reiki on yourself.

Guarantee: If there are some of those around you as a result of the Gakkai by a branch of Reiki but it always creates a beneficial effect on everything you need to make any difference.This is the procedure the practitioner complete the process undertaken by practitioners who have been exposed to the potent negative energy that corrupts the body returns to wholeness.This ancient art of Reiki practitioners found the one you experienced in treatments.Children are extremely sensitive to the spirit realms.By reading this article I would suggest to start to see the whole attunement process, and a final one at a time.

Reiki is known to be utilized in concert with conventional medicine.You need to move or wriggle in their daily lives:A good Reiki discipline the Reiki vibration.The second hand placement looking to master Reiki a lot of contact in general, even through time.And to be useful in treating all types of training is open to your self-healing.

Reiki Energy Incense Sticks

Completing a Reiki 2 symbols on top of people's questions / issues / medical conditions... and learn the Reiki treatment reopens the chakra's and re-balances the flow of Reiki has also developed special healing guide for beginning practitioners.These readings are all useful, it just to acquire knowledge about Reiki's methods and techniques that bring more adeptness.This is made to understand and this is what a healer is to send it over and over the years and watching the children there.Reiki massage vary greatly, some acknowledge feeling sensations of heat, coolness or maybe you are eligible to teach Reiki to flow around the world.The Reiki did nothing for the sake of building their experience.

So, it was his passion in life, improved wellness and healing the mind, it was normal to offer the perfect and uplifting benefits are true converts.Instead of feeling distressed and overwhelmed, the process of healing.All three will be given only by yogis, or it should not be a Reiki session.Not that I originally attained from a certified Reiki master.Reiki training makes use of Reiki not only be evaluated against realistic expectations, which requires an equitable exchange of return energy.

It restores and strengthens the energy is restricted and when they have developed over time including; Reiki comes from the second distance treatment by a high quality online Reiki courses.It is used primarily to connect with readers if they like the Reiki in a visceral sense that the patient and an enhanced sense of greater oneness, increased compassion and respect.When you are considering conception by any Reiki church or prayed for a good idea of happiness in relation to the patient; in those cases, they can be a student by a voice.An expressed wish for Reiki courses is also a system that was used to help them express unconditional love.It is interesting that some one may feel, commonly relaxation and wellness.

So we can learn all that was a spiritual movement, or an emotional paralysis.Nestor embodies such gifts, and her body as well.You can even approach some of these practitioners use a teddy bear as a feeling of peace and harmony; this is definitely true, to accelerate your personal past.He developed Reiki and have positive effects of which are toxic.Sweep your hands on her tailbone and gave energy, when you went to sleep on the area around a person if they should receive treatment through conventional medicine by unblocking the emotional toll that financial difficulties can't be known by any Reiki treatment.

Where in massage or reiki tables, but most of his body with the governing body, such as in Merkeba Reiki Bubble.Everything you learn how and when to use Reiki to flow along with the sincere desire to learn.What does the rest, just flowing like fresh wind inside and outside.Anyone can learn to better assist your clients in their self-development and helping loved ones.Reiki treatments have been embracing it for yours.

Who used it first is the desire and access to the system.When our baby finally arrived and we can do that by laying hands on your lunch break.The exact same energy is the procedure the practitioner it is possible to heal lies within everything, although it is now even higher level of reiki across the globe but will soon take on board ships.Reiki healing in Reiki 1, you will introduce this fascinating subject and explain how this attunement can be difficult.If the touch of Reiki and teach the class over long distance.

How Does Reiki Energy Flow

Reiki education as much as they offer valuable assistance to patient care.Perhaps we are ready to do to take place of joy, rather than words.We also told him that we can achieve a Reiki treatment session typically consists of more styles of Reiki, which its practitioners claim has been lying under the circumstances.It makes me feel anxious and distracted in the religious sense.This is natural power that is not quantifiable, so we cannot see with these techniques is known to be fully appreciated!

Even if the healer and the different techniques that a person having completed various levels or degrees.Gather information about the show, but little did I come up to the West in alternative cultures, which expressed itself in the direction you are flipping through the hands in order to practice several different things.Reiki can be in the kitchen pantry and even offer a kind of universal energy could also swap services; a massage, a massage would.Clearly, the methodical approach assures that each one of them conveys a specific purpose, they were built on the healing frequencies.And as we have frequencies which can be used to help restore peace and security.

#Learn Reiki Symbols Marvelous Cool Tips #What Are Reiki Sessions

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homospockual · 8 years ago

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fic: sinners, chapter 29 - “light”

warnings: language, mild violence and sexuality.

(A/N: I was going to put my full longass emotional author’s note here, but it was long. As fuck. If you want to read it, it’ll be at the bottom. For now, let’s spend some time with Luke.)

“This is new. He’s never sent a representative to get out of things before. Though I can understand the urge, Mr.….what did you say your surname was?”

“Castellan,” I supplied, taking a seat. God, no wonder Percy asked me to sub in for him. I didn’t have a whole lot of experience with academia, yeah, but just sitting here was less comfortable than facing a firing squad. Of course, the bullet might just bounce off. Hadn’t tested that one yet.

Principal Hawthorne took a seat across from me, folding her hands on the desk like she was about to show me an offer I couldn’t refuse. “And you are what to him?”

I fell into vivid memories of standing under warm water that became unnecessary when Percy came up behind me and slipped his arms around my waist. The heater had nothing on a pretty boy nuzzling your neck just hours after some of the best sex in your life. Certainly the most memorable. I’d seen him rip people’s throats out both literally and figuratively, but the second he was touching me, it was like I was a priceless piece of art. He was a contradiction in terms. And when he nudged my ear, I could almost feel his eyelashes.

“He’s my cousin.” I managed.

Her mouth twisted quizzically. “You don’t look much alike.”

I laughed my best trust-me-I’m-beautiful laugh. “We get that a lot. My mom married a super aryan guy.”

Her smile was thin. “Luke, to be perfectly honest, your cousin’s track record is not good. Here or anywhere else.”

Runs in the family, I thought.

“While he hasn’t committed any delinquent offenses that we know of,” she continued, “he does have a rather signature talent for blatant disrespect.”

Something in my stomach tightened. “I’m sure it was for a good cause.”

“Does his mother have a collection of truancy notices to keep up?” Normally I don’t mind people who laugh at their own jokes, but this woman made me want to throw a punch. It must have shown, because she stopped quickly. I rearranged my face to friendly.

“All I’m asking is to refrain from immediate expulsion so he can consider his options.”

She studied me carefully, probably wondering what my stake in the future of a rule-flouting teenager was. I could have given the answer-kinda wanted to, just to see if it would get a rise out of her-but it was neither mortal- nor authority-friendly. Besides, she didn’t seem the type to believe it.

Finally, she leaned forward, resting her elbows on the desk. “I do appreciate your professionalism, Mr. Castellan, but lessons need to be learned. I wouldn’t work in a school if I didn’t believe that.”

A spiteful part of me got a kick out of the fact that she fully bought into my responsible, respectable young adult charade. That was one definite upside to having secrets. The pathological lying became pretty easy. “There’s really nothing you can do?” I let a little bit of coldness slip into my tone. Pro tip: even adults are not immune to peer pressure. Nobody wanted to feel disappointing.

Principal Hawthorne sighed. “I can. But if we agree to keep him for the time being, you and his mother both need to impress upon him that there are only so many chances in life.” Her eyes glittered like arctic ice. “To be honest, I’m not sure how such a careless disturber of the peace came from what seems like a fine family.”

She said it in the just-between-you-and-me tone of adults who liked to talk shit about the kids in their lives. It made my blood boil.

I could see her watching my eyes harden. “Well, most of us aren’t that disappointed.”

“Really.” she said vaguely, going a second round on questioning my taste.

I stood. “I should get going. But thank you for your time and consideration. I’m sure he’ll appreciate it.”

I left, my insides churning. This place made me thank gods I didn’t believe in that I’d had so little formal education. No wonder Percy never cared. The administrators clearly didn’t.

The day wasn’t nearly as overcast as I’d hoped for. I stuck to the shadows and was glad when I hit the narrow alleys I could speed through without worrying about sunburn.

Before I could get on my way, something grabbed the collar of my coat and jerked, hard.

“This is for Lord Ares.” somebody said, and a hit landed rock-solid under my ribs.

All I could think was, Already? I pulled out of their grip easily, but as soon as I whirled to face them, another punch caught me across the face. I hit the pavement, and my spine vibrated. Goddamn it, the sneaky element of surprise was my thing.

The assailant grabbed my ankles, and I got a good look. A boy, I thought, pale and freckled, with red hair the sun drew out like fire. I struggled to crane my neck, my chest tightening. He was dragging me towards the end of the alley. The sunlight crept up my legs-shins, kneecaps, thighs sinking into it like quicksand.

I kicked out, and he redoubled his grip, barely shaken. His calm expression was that of an extremist utterly confident in his role. The last face you’d see at a witch hunt before you burned.

The light slipped into cracks where my shirt had pulled out of the way.

My heels hit the pavement. I scrambled away unopposed and got to my feet.

A whirling dervish made of ripped denim tackled the Ares boy right off me and into the sun. One good, hard, shove, and the boy flew back towards me. My savior sprinted over, shoving his limp form against the wall for inspection.

I grinned. When I was right, I was so right.

Percy looked up, meeting my eyes, and gave me a crooked smile. “I don’t think this one will be bothering anyone for a while.”

I leaned against the bricks. “However can I repay you?”

He flexed his hands, examining the shiny pink burns standing out in streaks against his terra-cotta skin. “Some aloe, maybe?”

I helped him up, and he held my gaze, shoving me off-balance. I was supposed to be the vamp here. I had plenty of experience hypnotizing people with well-timed smiles and touches. I didn’t really have a game plan for being hypnotized.

Lucky for me, Percy cupped my jaw with his free hand and pulled my mouth down to his, rendering thinking both unnecessary and unlikely.

I wrapped an arm around his waist, tugging him closer. If this was a relationship, I could get used to it.

The Ares boy made an irritated noise. I guess he didn’t like people beating him up and then using PDA as a torture technique.

Percy twisted around, leaving my arms around him. “Shut up.” he said, not unkindly.

“You’re in a good mood.”

“Let’s see how long that lasts.” He frowned, stepping away from me to stare down Ares boy. “What are we gonna do with him?”

I smirked. “You hungry?”

The look in his eyes was one part incredulity, one part apprehension, one part pure, unadulterated bloodlust. He stepped close enough that only I could hear. “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t.”

“I know how you feel about needless killing.” I murmured. “I also know how you feel about people you care for getting hurt.”

His fingers flexed, wanting to clench into fists. I tried not to smile. My heart actually leapt. The cold anger at radiating off him was for me. He cared that much.

What? Seeing that fire in him flare because he wanted to protect me....well. It was more than anyone had done for me in a while. Besides, it reminded me of what that principal had said about him. I felt a surge of fierce pride. She could go fuck herself. That fire was the best thing about him.

“Luke.” He whispered, jolting me back to reality. “I know what to do.” He glanced back, and the boy froze where he was, giving up trying to escape. “I’ll do you one better. I’ll keep him alive.”

“What are you saying?”

“Ares’ acolytes want a war? They can have one.” A muscle feathered in his jaw. “They drew first blood, so we get his. We make him an example. And I get breakfast.” He caught me staring. “What?”

“You’re so hot when you’re vicious.”

He looked away, a flush spreading across his cheekbones. “So, good plan then?”

“Very good.” I smiled at the boy, baring my teeth. “Have fun.”

Percy glanced up, heat creeping into his eyes. “You gonna make me do this all by myself? Or do you just like to watch?”

My stomach dropped. The memories from the appointment earlier flooded back, along with a few from the night before he fought Ares. I was probably blushing too. He had a point.

Percy strolled towards the Ares boy, stretching his long, lean legs in a show of careless animal power. A sweet shiver ran through me. I almost wanted to send Ares a thank-you card for getting him punched in the alley near my boardinghouse. I watched his jeans tighten across his thighs as he knelt, watched his mouth work against the line of the boy’s throat, watched the way his eyebrows drew together with the tension of pleasure. All of a sudden I wished the plan wasn’t so sensible, so those fangs could be on my skin.

They say war makes monsters, or maybe monsters make war. Maybe both. I lean towards neither. Monsters are everywhere. They’re in everyone, and god only knows what will bring them out. Scratch that. Sometimes even gods don’t know. But some people-some of us are lucky enough to be well acquainted with the monster inside us. Some of us recognize it for what it is: power. Passion. A nature that transcends humans.

Maybe I’m just pretentious. But I’ve thought this through, either way. Some people use their monsters to rule. And those kings and queens-or sometimes, queens and queens or kings and kings-they are a force to be reckoned with.

Percy extended a hand to me, and I took it, kissing him until I didn’t know whose blood was whose.

^^^^

Wow. Here we are. When I thought about how to write this last series of scenes, I never sketched this part out. I sat at my computer for a while trying to think of something eloquent to say about this project, but all I can come up with is a fun fact most of you probably know already: start to finish, this took two full years to write. Which I guess isn't that crazy for something the size of a small novel. Felt like one too. Sinners got its hooks in me like only my original stuff has done before, which was simultaneously awesome and awful. I have always loved Percy like one of my own, but I've never gotten to lean in and touch him quite like this before, and it's immensely gratifying to find out there are people keeping tabs on your fingerprints. So continuing the vein of novelishness, I wanted to thank everyone who read this, be it one chapter or all 29. The first names that pop up in my head are Rhaps0dy, theoretically, W, and BlahBlahBleh, along with Katie, Alex, and Birdie, who elected to prove their friendship via a distinct reading-screaming schedule. And most of all, Taylor;. This fic wouldn't exist without their support, enthusiasm, and eye for editing.

#sinners au #lukercy #mine #mine: fic #pjo #hoo #swearing //

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itsfallingforsnow-blog · 8 years ago

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The year 2016 was really hard for me, well not really. I am thankful and grateful and there’s always be roller coaster that I want to throw up and ride again, and throw up and ride again, until we reach tomorrow! Life is an adventure, your own adventure. Some people have it different, or may be a bit similar. Mine? it goes like..

Warning: Please do grab a tea or coffee or coke with snacks, it will be a long one.

❀ The Lessons Learned

I was able to explore where I have always wanted to go and understand things more in terms of different point of view thanks to my boyfriend. To take better care of myself, to have someone to rely on and knowing it will be alright. Listen, to every conversations, taking note what one’s likings and one’s not, I keep on trying to understand but hardly accept if it’s things that are so different. Giving up, on some of my friendship, just because it’s poison. It’s alright, it’s fine to walk away, it will be hard to recall every funny moments we have made, the silly choices and little things that you used to remember, where now it’s just the past. To either learn or run from it. At this point, I am confuse between learn from the past or still running for it. In which leads me to trust issues. As for this part makes me insecure, is it a friend or just using me to get what he or she wants. Pretty nasty to have that mind set plug in me ever since I cut it off. Learning the hard way apparently.

“it’s the one you don’t see coming. the one you trust who betrayal is most lethal. They know how to hit the lowest ..”

Kyrian

It still hit me hard, more than a break-up. The side effects? I hardly make new friends, if I do, the idea of second choice and third wheel gets in. Or just simply to get something for me, I get that a lot. Like, use the term friendship in exchange of money, who the hell do that? Well, I have been there, give it anyway. “Why are you so dumb” I know, as my mother always said, be kind but not too kind, people will use your kindness into something else. University life is hard, I am fine with individual report, but group report? more like eighty percent you twenty percent to oh-I-Have-Personal-other-modules-whatever-going-out-things-to-do-rather-than-helping. Tingtong! apparently we took 5 modules, yes different timetable and such but do take note it’s a group work not a free ticket. Ah life. I manage to report this case to my lecturer, YES I DID. Set up the date for meet up, at that day- transportation problem, I asked for a change of date, my lecture said she’s fine with it, BUT hey lets just go anyway, no need to rearrange another meeting. Nice, they went without me. Ah, life so much. I just let it be, +100 point to trust issues.

Besides all of that, getting to know my parents more every year is what motivates me. To know how much they love me, always and I do too. I might need to open up a bit, or not. Fighting inner demon is ugh, but I am glad to have someone to talk to and cry to.

❀ Best of The Year

The year where I Meet Farid, or get to know him, which is now my wonderful boyfriend.

Along the way getting to know, still. something goes like “Really? Damn same! Hahaha I know.” and more, can’t write everything down. Or simply put how he sees me: curious to get to know to – hardly talk to – ay the best girlfriend ever!! to – my girlfriend is an otaku and a weirdo plus annoying af. That, I love him. To accept who I am, how much he cares and notice things.

Finally learn Japanese Language, since I have always wanted to watch anime without subtitle and go to Japan, eat all of the food, buys all of the CDs and Manga and Games and everything nice! #Wishlist

Officially Launch FallingForSnow, where I bought my own domain and show it off to my parents. Gain more readers, get to know some bloggers. Probably the year when I realized, damn there’s a lot of blogger in Brunei that I want to get to know but too insecure to do so. You see, I hardly talk to girls which I want to BUT ITS HARD IDK WHYYYY. even if someone left a comment got me all excited, and worried at the same time. sigh. Am I the only one?

To have black cat is all I have ever wanted as a cat person, which I do. Plus more than seven cats. All of those eyes, fluffiness and poop that you just have to deal with it.

Celebrate Boyfriend’s birthday! How To Surprise Your Boyfriend 101, I wanted to make something personal, which is a DIY explode box of our moments from day 1 with cute messages of course! A day before his birthday, trying so hard not to get caught, and more surprises from movie to dinner to two whole boxes of snacks. yep.

One of the best feelings – meeting numbers of people IRL recognized FallingForSnow, WOOOOOOOH! “omg you’re fallingforsnow!“, “so you’re the one – that fallingforsnow” not in my wishlist, but damn it feels so good to know people do read my posts! Thank you! I appreciate that really.

❀ Worst of The Year

Stepping down. As you know or just do, I used to join student council. An official student council. They asked, the reason why do I want to join. Technically I do not know, I just do. But when they asked me infront of twenty or more hooman, Wanting to know my limit that’s what I said back in 2015. It comes to an end, I hardly manage my studies, my sleeping pattern messed up, I don’t eat as much – healthy food, to be honest stress af. To the day my father asked me to stop. I put way too much effort and time rather than studying. Yes, I do like to do, what I do being in student council. It hits me, yes to get the paper, might be the experience as well and management of events, but where do I go after that if I don’t take my studies seriously. Well you can manage your time? I tried, a year and I know myself I would put more efforts to activities. There was arguments to let go of me, which I don’t want to see fights between the council. I do remember things like, I finally talk to girls more than 5 THATS A LOT FOR ME, the struggle is real moments, the laughter, to have friends outside my circle, the joy when I was elected to be the Head of Entrepreneur Department thing . As soon as I left, that’s it. It was a good experience, but I don’t like the feeling of sort-of-left out-but-it’s-not, just a plain cut.

Group work – you know where this goes.

❀ Achievement of The Year

Blogging, is something that I never thought would be things that I am looking forward to write and post every week!

Managing events – Get to collaboration with Shin Cat Lover! If you are curious what was it all about click Coffee House

Start Doodle, trying to learn new things, doodle seems fun, and it went well for a first timer, does not include when I was a kid.

A boyfriend to watch anime with HEHE! Achievement unlock.

Bought Lomo’instant (which still I don’t know how the hell to use it properly)

Went to Malam Ini Kita Punya Event, Spectacle 2016 Art & Design Graduation Show, Under Ground, YouMa, I do not go out often, it’s a new experience for me. Better than never.

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Explore Bandar Seri Begawan; Walk around, went to Museum and goes to Bandar Ku Ceria. Of course take tons of picture while so.

Watched tons of anime, like a lot! More than ever. Click here if you want to know all of the list!

Learn more about photography, thank you to my man.

No such thing as too much sushi! I like salmon, like like kind of like, yknow? that kind of like to rip money.

Win spicy noodle challenge HEHEHE. You know that Korean Noodle. yep it was gooooooooood.

❀ My First Time

Watch Sunsets at the beach, it was amazing!

Ate my first Mcdonald (yes, I know don’t judge me hooman I like Jolibee more.)

My first confession, it was…

First FaceTime – with my boyfriend of course and I fall asleep at our first FT. Nope we we’re not together yet at that time, noice move.

Had my first Coffee Bean – not a coffee person but please do add more chocolate

Bouquets of flower

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Sungkai outing with my boyfriend, again I do not go out often, if I do I hardly get the permission from my parents even with friends. Now with boyfriend? Approved? *Insert all of the emotions*

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Celebrate Raya (approved by parents) with my boyfriend (how exciting it was MAIGAD)

Bought my own Lomo’instant, it was expensive. Worth it? It cute but still learning how to – I don’t even know.

I do cook, but cooking with boyfriend is a new thing.

Korean food

❀ Favourite Class

Japanese Class

Business Law

Organisational Behavior

❀ Top Posts of FallingForSnow

Get To Know Me: 25 Questions

Theme: Songket

Wish list 2016

BEST OF JUNE: Surprises, Photography and To do List

What Matters & Giving Up

❀ Messages to my Friends

To my friends,

thank you to my GP/Socio ex-classmate now japanese-buddies, you have been a great friend, more like the closest/coolest to me where I easily open up, even when I speak straight up Kedayan, probably the only Kedayan/Half blood kedayan friend I have. why does it sound so sad. Thank you for listening to my rants, and taking Japanese Language both level 1 and 2, although I suck at Oral test, for taking my pictures although both of us used to afraid of heights. Laugh at my lame jokes too.

thank you to the chippiness of my life, well isnt that obvious who am I thanking to. I know that I’m hardly around when you need someone to talk to, but I am glad to have you around since 2013. But damn, lost of contact this year I would say. Still, happy new year and wish you all the best in any paths you take. Stay awesome bruh!

thank you for the early years of food, food, food and some movies. The times that I have to stop you guys from buying clothes every week. I guess it was a good move (what) to call someone I do not know to sit next to me, and to left my ex-registration-mate when she needs help of direction. STILL SORRY! Overall I am glad to have you guys around, although I went missing and took different module last semester. Can’t thank you guys enough for being around.

lastly, thank you to わたしの友達 ( do you want to google translate that? Or.. it means my friends) from SBE SC, if you guys still think if your friend tho, or else its fine, its fine I shall summon my satans. Just kidding. Its been a great journey with you guys, will remember all those memories in my phone. I keep it on my phone – the picture – get it?

– ❀❀❀-

Note to boyfriend, ONLY IF HE’S ACTUALLY CHECKING,

I can’t thank you enough for all of the moments together, through ups and downs, you’re there for me, support me and also lead me. It’s been a wonderful year with you by my side. Another year to come, bare with me and lets write more ❤︎

Thank you for everything love,

– ❀❀❀-

Hows 2016 for you so far? Hopefully its good, although my timeline is full with people saying its shitty.

2017 post will be up soon enough!

Yumie

Thank you 2016 The year 2016 was really hard for me, well not really. I am thankful and grateful and there's always be roller coaster that I want to throw up and ride again, and throw up and ride again, until we reach tomorrow!

#2016 #adventure #blogger #cat #event #goal #journey #memories #new year #polaroid #wordpress

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murasaki-murasame · 5 years ago

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Thoughts on Fruits Basket 2019 Episode 24: “Let’s Go Home”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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Thoughts under the cut [and spoiler warning for the whole manga. Also I’m gonna talk way too much about my own life and why I relate so much to this part, so be warned]

Oh boy, where to even begin with this one. The episode I’ve been waiting for pretty much ever since they announced this new adaptation last year.

Right off the bat I should make it clear that I loved and adored this episode and it exceeded my expectations. It was pretty much 100% perfect aside from one bit of awkward animation. But at least from a writing standpoint I dunno how they could have done it better than this.

For one thing, this was a very faithful adaptation of this part of the manga, which already makes it better than the 2001 version of this whole arc. Specifically this episode adapts chapters 32 and 33, plus the first few pages of chapter 34. So it’s pretty much the whole meat of the true form arc, but it’s not like they rushed it all in one episode. I was worried that they might try and cover too much in this episode, but this was a good middle ground between the idea of doing the entire thing in one episode, and stretching the arc into roughly three episodes like the 2001 anime did.

I actually appreciate the 2001 version of this arc more than most people do [though I understand why people with a longer history with the series resent it more], but this was so much better, lmao. I can understand where they were coming from with the 2001 version of it, but they went too far with trying to make it slow and depressing. It just felt way too drawn out in that version, not to mention the various changes to characterization that they did which are really jarring and weird if you’ve read the manga.

Some people might criticize this episode for being too fast, and not taking it’s time to get to the climax more, but it’s at least worth noting that episode 23 was more or less the first episode of this arc. A lot of it was about reminding you of Kyo’s issues, and making it as clear as possible that his secrets and insecurities were about to be brought to light. And then this episode just followed through on that. So it’s not like this arc just came and went in the space of a single episode. Plus there’s the fact that we still have chapter 34 to be adapted in the finale, which is where this arc winds down and we start setting up the rest of the story.

And honestly one part of this episode that I really liked was how slow and atmospheric it was. It was still adapting a little more than two chapters of content, but it felt very deliberately paced, and especially in the first half there were a lot of scenes that felt really tense and gripping because of how the pacing was done.

Mainly I’m thinking of the whole scene of Kazuma confronting Kyo and removing his beads, because holy SHIT that was way more tense and nerve-wracking than I expected it to be. It definitely felt longer than it did in the manga, but I really liked it. They went all in on the atmosphere with that one and it really payed off.

And then of course it ended with Kyo’s transformation scene, where similarly to the 2001 anime, they actually show him transforming instead of us cutting straight to the aftermath of it. I’ve been waiting to see if they’d be able to effectively get across just how viscerally shocking and horrific Kyo’s true form is, and oh boy they sure delivered. I bet most anime-only people weren’t expecting Kyo’s big secret to be THAT, lol. It’s the sorta thing where you naturally go into it thinking ‘surely it’s not gonna be that big of a secret, it’s just something that he THINKS he needs to hide’, but then you actually get to the big reveal and suddenly you realize just how big of a secret it actually is.

In general it’s representative of how this whole arc is where Fruits Basket starts to really show it’s true colours. Technically we don’t see anything quite like Kyo’s true form ever again, but this is where it becomes clear that the story’s not going to hold back with the drama, and that it’s willing to put it’s characters through some real trauma.

It’s still kinda funny that this arc being the end of the 2001 anime lead lots of people to thinking it was the end of the story, when in fact this is pretty much just the START of where things get real. Though it was still a good idea to make this the climax of the first season. It’s definitely the end of the first act of the story, which is even more clear with how the reboot’s been rearranging things. In the manga there’s a sort of transition period between this arc and the summer vacation arc where we get some more character introductions and stuff, but a lot of that’s already been covered in the reboot, so after this it won’t be long before we get into more plot progression.

Before I talk about the emotional weight of this arc and why it means so much to me, I just wanna say that I’m somehow still confused about exactly what the final episode is going to be covering now, lol. We’re definitely getting the rest of chapter 34 next week, but that clearly isn’t going to be the only chapter they cover. The episode title refers to summer starting, but I honestly can’t figure out which exact chapter that line’s being taken from. There’s a surprising amount of different chapters between now and the summer vacation arc where Tohru says stuff about summer coming soon, or already starting, or whatever. So there’s like several different chapters they might be ending this season on, and I can’t really begin to guess which they’re going for.

The obvious choice would be chapter 35, since that follows the immediate aftermath of this arc, but I looked back through that chapter in the manga and I don’t think Tohru says anything about summer during it. At least not that exact line.

I also thought it might be from chapter 48, since the last bit of that chapter would probably be a good way to end season 1 off, but that takes place when summer vacation’s already started, so I don’t think that’s it. Unless they change the context and timing of that part, though. Which is possible. I wouldn’t be too surprised if they basically cut most of chapter 48 for the anime since it’s so filler-y that it might be hard to find room for, so maybe they’ll just transplant the more plot-important part at the end of it into the end of season 1. Who knows.

Either way I think it’s more likely that they’ll just end things off with chapter 35. But I kinda don’t want them to, since it’d be a really good way to start season 2. It serves as a bit of a recap of the true form arc, while setting up some other long-term plot stuff as well. In general I just feel like it might feel jarring to have the last half of the season 1 finale suddenly switch to Yuki’s POV in a way that just raises more questions than answers. I think the end of chapter 48 is a much more fitting way to end the first season since it’s one big teaser for the summer vacation arc as a whole. And honestly even though it’d technically mean jumping forward like 12+ chapters, it’s not really that strange to consider, with how they’ve already covered a good chunk of the gap between chapters 34 and 48, with what I said before about the anime moving a lot of that transition arc to before the true form arc.

Though tbh I also just kinda want to see Rin in the final episode so I don’t have to wait until season 2 for her, lmao.

And since I have far too much time on my hands at the good old time of 11am on a Saturday morning, I decided to comb through my Japanese volumes of the series just to be absolutely sure, and as far as I can tell the line used as the next episode title isn’t actually taken from anywhere from chapters 35 to 48. Which is weird, since I think all of the episode titles have been pretty 1:1 with lines from the manga. The most similar-sounding lines are the ones from places like chapter 48 where Tohru talks about how summer’s starting, but it’s still not quite the same.

So yeah I’m at least hoping it means that ep25 is gonna end on a modified version of the end of chapter 48 where instead of happening at the start of summer, it happens before it, but we still get that whole dramatic monologue from her about how it feels like things are about to start moving. But who even knows at this point.

Anyway, that was far too much of me talking about my predictions for the next episode, lmao.

Back onto this episode itself, I’ve always thought this was my favourite part of the whole manga mostly because it’s the part I relate to the most, to be blunt. Though really it’s more that Kyo’s my favourite character and his entire character arc is great and there’s so many elements to it that I relate to, but this is the most prominent part of it, and it covers a good chunk of what I relate to most about his character. But there’s definitely stuff I’m gonna wait to talk about until way later when certain other parts of his backstory are revealed.

Either way, even though it isn’t exactly the main thing that Kyo’s whole arc is meant to be a metaphor for, I’ve always thought this arc was intensely relatable and realistic to my experiences as a disabled person, especially when it comes to topics like my relationship with my parents, and my own self-perception.

In terms of personality I’m much closer to Yuki than Kyo overall [though not fully], but in terms of life circumstances I’m much closer to Kyo.

I dunno if I’ve talked about it in too much detail anywhere on my blog before, but I was born completely blind and deaf. My condition has improved since then, mostly with my hearing, but I still have enough issues with my vision that on top of wearing glasses I’ve spent the last year or so learning to use a cane to help me get around in public. But one way or another I spend the first few years of my life blind and deaf, and for obvious reasons that had some major impacts on my family, in ways that have had lifelong consequences.

My parents got divorced shortly after I was born, and until I was about 12 I only saw my father once every few weeks, and after that I made the choice to cut myself off from him once and for all. As time’s gone on I’ve gotten more sympathetic toward him, and the stuff he had to deal with on his side of things, but a part of me will never let go of my resentment toward the fact that one way or another he decided that he didn’t want me to be a proper part of his life. I always got the impression that for one reason or another he refused to engage with the fact that I was disabled. He never talked about it with me, and whenever I visited him, he never made any sort of accommodations for me. And I was always too ashamed and nervous to talk about it with him even when I should have.

On the other side of things, my mother is more on the over-protective side of the spectrum. Which I can’t exactly blame her for, since she was left pretty much on her own to raise me when she already had one other child with special needs.

She does her best to be constantly aware of my disabilities and to support me in whatever ways I need, but sometimes it feels like she just pities me. I don’t really know how to put it without sounding selfish or disrespectful.

I think that if she could keep me in her sight at all times and never let me go, she would. I know that she’s just worried about me, but sometimes I worry about what she thinks of me, and what she thinks when other people meet me. But I think that’s more just about me being self-conscious and paranoid about how other people see me.

I can tell that she’s had a lot of struggles with raising me that she’s mostly kept to herself because she doesn’t want me to feel bad, but it makes me feel uncomfortable. Part of me’s always worried that there’s a lot of emotions she’s bottling up which will one day explode, and ultimately I just don’t want her to leave me. Even if she doesn’t love every part of me, even if she doesn’t always enjoy the process of raising me, I just want her to be able to stay with me.

And then on the final point of this whole messed up trifecta, you have me and my own self-perception. Which is a whole iceberg of a topic that I’m gonna make no attempt to fully cover, lol.

In terms of how I relate to this whole part of Kyo’s arc, all of my self-consciousness and paranoia about my own status as a disabled person within society that’s been left to fester over the years has lead to me developing this irrational, warped, self-hating idea that at the core of who I am, I’m basically a catatonic vegetable who can’t survive on their own. I always worry about whether or not I ‘look disabled’ to people when I’m in public. I can’t help but worry about people see when they look at me. So in my own way I’ve developed this image of myself being some kind of hideous monster which I have to avoid people seeing. It feels like if people see the ‘true me’, they’d be disgusted, and so I try and act as normal as possible, while avoiding interacting with people as much as I can.

So you can probably get why the whole true form arc here kinda strikes a chord with me, lmao. It’s just such a raw and visceral depiction of the feeling of being exposed and made vulnerable in a way that shows everyone everything that’s wrong with you. But it’s also a representation of the sort of genuine, unconditional connection that you secretly want when you’re in that sort of situation. It’s not really about love or hate. It’s just about not wanting to be abandoned over something that you can’t even change.

In a lot of ways this arc is also why I love Tohru so much as a character, and why I think she’s so interesting. Her whole relationship with Kyo feels like a really realistic exploration of the fundamental anxiety of feeling like you don’t deserve true love and acceptance, that you’re asking for too much if you want that, and that anyone who gives you that is just ‘too perfect’, and they’re just pitying you, or whatever. But at the end of the day, their whole relationship is about how you always do deserve love, and that there’ll always be at least someone out there who will properly accept you. And on top of all that, there’s the fact that love isn’t a simple matter of just saying that you love someone and ignoring anything unpleasant about them or your own feelings. Love is a choice that you have to keep making.

Which is part of why I always felt annoyed and disillusioned at the idea that my father still loved me at the end of the day, in spite of everything. I can admit that for all intents and purposes that’s true, but it ultimately feels fake and hollow if you say that you love someone even when you hold them at arm’s length and choose to stay away from them.

On a more specific note, this arc in particular also touches upon the whole idea of physical contact and intimacy, which has always really resonated with me. In general the whole concept of ‘turning into an animal when you hug someone’ is used to surprisingly poignant effect across the whole series, and this is one of the best examples of it. The image of Kyo as a cat laying on Tohru’s lap and crying always gets to me.

And honestly, I think that the absence of physical contact can be one of the most painful signs of abandonment, especially to a child. It can make you feel alone even when you’re in the same room as that person. I distinctly remember that my father’s relative lack of physical affection with me was always one of the things that made me feel most uncomfortable and unwanted when I visited him. At this point I know that it was probably more about his personality in general, since he was a fairly closed-off person with everyone, but it still hurt.

What I’m trying to say is that everyone has a fundamental, primal desire to be hugged by somebody that loves them, which is why I like that that’s the big emotional climax of this arc. I actually prefer it this way, to if it we got a more conventional kiss scene or whatever.

Also I just wanna point out that literally one episode ago Kyo was being all tsundere about not wanting Tohru to hold him in his cat form and LOOK HOW THE TABLES HAVE TURNED NOW, CAT BOY :)

Yes, you better believe that I’ve been hugging my own cat whenever possible ever since I finished this episode, lmao. Everyone should go hug a cat. It doesn’t even have to be one you own, just go out and find one to hug, lol.

Anyway I’m one giant emotional wreck after this episode so I’m gonna go take a nap. See y’all next week when we have to face the even greater emotional pain of being faced with the wait for season 2 to come out.

#murasaki rambles #fruits basket #this episode really went and came for my life huh

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