#i really could ramble on about q too- but i'm holding it in

[blizzardfluffykpop]

Yoooooo dude, I’m starting to understand why you like Changmin so much. I mean, not only is he cute, funny, and dedicated, but he has a certain charm that I can’t quite put my finger on and none of the others seem to have it, at least not to the same degree. We all know you love Q but after watching more The Boyz content, it’s like oh…. OHHHH…. I finally get it. He might just become my bias too, tbh 🫣. I don’t think I’ll really know until the after the concert but him, Jacob, and Hyunjae have caught my eye. Jacob is just cute but Hyunjae has a special level of “dorky loser” (I mean this in the best way possible) that I can’t help but be kinda drawn to.

Btw, when I told my friend that I’m going to the concert with that there will be 2x as many members as the last concert we went to (Oneus), she literally texted back “Oh man, are there really that many band members?” So yeah. That will be an interesting experience for her. Anyway thanks again for the recs!!!!

I'm sorry I couldn't get back to you sooner! I just saw them in concert- and I spent 4 days in total over in NYC *which was a crazy experience* and didn't have access to tumblr- anyways!! I'm sosososo glad you're enjoying them!!

I'm so glad you're starting to see his charm!!! Look it's crazy- he has this charm that is unbelievable and absolutely reels you in- he's dorky but cute- yet silly as a goose- but then has this way of calming himself- he's two opposites combined in one and it's just hard to look away from- and his dedication!? Is sincerely unmatched! If you ever figure out that charm- pls lmk- because I haven't been able to put my finger on it either but it's just ebhbehbhebha ("we all know you love q" - i def walk around with that plastered on my forehead 😂😂) but I'm sososososo glad you're finallllyyyy getting it- it doesn't hit you right away- and then all of sudden he's got you wrapped around his fingers- BUT OMG YES ANOTHER CHANGMIN BIAS- we can be kyubodans together~ 😌🤭💖 (I wonder if there is any updates on that? If you've already decided for real- 👀)

But I def get that- and I told myself I wouldn't admit to a new bias until after the concert- and I may have to admit that I have another soon- But anyways- I can't wait to see who ends up on the official bias lineup!! And I can def see why you bias Jacob! He is seriously so cute! Hwvr I am telling you this to warn you that he's about to blow your mind with his vocals- good luck to your heart- and oh my god- you're so right he's a "dorky loser"- it's so captivating! Just like how Juyeon *imo* is an "awkward baby loser" we love losers here~ (Ik I do too!) but Hyunjae def has that charm and the giggle- good luck with the dork too- I won't spoil anything- but I will let you know he's gonna wear some vv wonho esque clothes :) And q's dimple will send you to new plains- they're each so good ehbhebbhbha- (I really could go on but them live is just unbelievable dude- you won't get over it- pllllsssss spam me with your concert thoughts! *ofc if you wish to!!*)

Oh my god- that's gonna be so fun for you two to experience together! Omg it is 2x as many- I didn't even think of that- was seeing oneus fun btw? And it's no problem! I hope you're enjoying them all! I love these little silly weirdos sm- But pls enjoy the concert!!! It's gonna be unforgettable I promise!!

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Off the Page 1

Warnings: non/dubcon and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

Characters: skinny!Steve

Part of the Bookstore AU

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.

Maria brings you your travel cup as you acknowledge her with a quiet thanks under your breath. You try not to turn your attention from the person on the other side of the table. You keep your rehearsed smile in place, nodding as you open the cover of their book and write their name inside before leaving a message and your signature below. They ramble on but you don't mind so much, their passion is entirely flattering.

You still can't believe this is your life. You're a writer. Not that freelancer knocking out commissions for pennies, by an author. It's your second novel and by your publisher's declaration, a hit. You suppose you wouldn't be on a book tour if it wasn't.

You pause to have a sip of coffee. You've been here all morning. That there were people lined up before opening assured you of the long day but it just doesn't seem to stop. At the end, you're set to do a reading and giveaway a collector's edition of the book. Your longing for your hotel room only grows deeper as your hand cramps and your eyes sting.

The next reader steps up, his book well-worn and clutched in his slender hands. He's thin and short, with a swoop of blonde hair over his forehead.

"H-hi," he sputters as he goes to set his book on the table but it hits the edge and falls to the floor, "oh, s-sorry, I'm sorry."

He's almost frantic as he bends to retrieve it and places it in front of you. You smile at him as one of the store's branded bags dangles from his elbow. He has to buy a book to get a signature. You pull his well-read copy towards you, the cover wrinkled and the spine cracked.

"You know, I could sign both..." you offer, "since you spent the extra money."

"Oh, oh, n-no, that's... that's okay. Um, thanks. Just that one." He smooths his hair with a shaky hand, "sorry, I've been awake since two in the morning. Too much caffeine."

"Tell me about it," you kid as you hold his book open, "I can tell you really liked the book."

"Ye-yeah, yeah, so much," he seems ready to burst as his blue eyes light up, "you know, I really love Emeris. He... I don't want to be lame but... he's like me. You know?"

"Oh, yeah," you agree kindly, "he's one of my favourites."

"Most writers -- I read a lot -- they always have the typical hero. Big and brawny, but you mad Emeris strong in other ways."

"I tried," you reply. "Anything in particular you want me to put here?"

"I... I can't think of anything," his eyes go wide, "I've been looking forward to this forever and I didn't think."

"That's okay," you assure him and uncap your pen, 'Keep on the path, my brave Emeris,' you weave onto the page. You sign your name and slide the novel across to him.

He takes it and opens it, reading as his nervousness breaks into a smile. He peeks up at you, closing the book to bring against his chest.

"Thank you!" He beams.

"No problem, you sticking around for the Q&A?"

"Oh yeah, my friend wants to go get a snack but we'll be back," he proclaims. "Thanks so so much."

"Yeah, no worries," you subtly look to the line.

"Oh, uh, I won't keep you any longer," he waves his hand apologetically, "can't wait for your reading."

"See ya," you return and turn to the next person, a girl in deep red plaid, a brand new copy plopped down before you.

You just have another hour until you get to sit in front of all these stranges and try not to get tongue-tied. It should be easy by now but those butterflies in your stomach still flutter. More coffee, next book.

📖

The Q&A goes about as well as any other. It was good fun but entirely exhausting. You're ready to just go as the winter sky darkens fast outside the bookstore windows. Maria stops you to talk about your train ride tomorrow and the next venue. You beg her to let you go back to the hotel.

"I told you it was going to be a lot," she chuckles.

"You did. And just like you said, I'm tired, so please, I have a tub with jets waiting for me."

"Just make sure you don't stay up all night writing your next bestseller," she winks.

"You're telling me to get sleep?"

"I'm a great sleeper, I just happen to sleep best while commuting," she shrugs, "fine, go. I'm just going to talk to the owner quick."

"Alright," you utter through a yawn and cover your mouth, "I'll see you tomorrow."

You leave the bookstore and the chill air blows into your open coat. You shiver and clutch the strap of your bag. The bright sign of a Korean shop catches your eye. You're so tired of the bland hotel room service, you can spare ten minutes and a couple bucks.

You cross the street and enter the shop. The lights are low and the din is soft. You approach the counter, perusing the menu laminated on top and order some hoison noodles.

You hear muffled chatter from the corner and sway, trying to ignore it. After paying, you move over to wait for your take-out. As you do, you sense someone watching you. You peer over and see an eerily familiar set of blue eyes. It takes you a moment to recall the skinny man from the signing.

He's with another sat across from him. A bigger man with dark hair and wide shoulders. He shakes his head and catches the blond's hand before he can wave at you. He hisses something at him and you quickly look away.

You're still getting used to that. It doesn't happen too often but it's still awkward. You face the counter and take out your phone, a way to make yourself look busy.

You try not to hear but it's so quiet in the place, "Steve, quit, she doesn't wanna talk to you."

"I know. I just wanted to say hi," the hiss blows back.

Your order number is called and you grab it with a thanks, eager to flee before the situation can devolve. As you go to the door, you hear a groan under the jingle of the bell above you.

"Great, Buck, you always got be a buzz kill..."

You don't look back as you walk away from the shop, searching out a taxi as the smell of the noodles torture your empty stomach. You might just fall asleep before you can enjoy your prize.

[seangelfish]

"Just hold onto me, okay?"

Izumi Sena x Reader ♡ Tags: Fluff, mutual crush, she/her pronouns ♡ Word count: 2,444 ♡ Synopsis: Inspired by the gacha story Dance on Ice in which this card is featured in. Reader is a soloist idol that has also acquired a photoshoot at the same ice rink Knights was having theirs at. However, you haven't ice skated before, so Izumi lends you a hand. ♡ A/N: I need more Izumi x reader fics.

"Hm, what? Were you guys looking for me?" asked Leo curiously.

"Not the two of us; just Anzu," Izumi stated. "She says she needs to talk to you about work. She already told me what it was about, but I can't make a decision on my own, right?"

Leo laughed. "Well, it's only natural for the leader to make decisions. So, what kind of work is it?"

Anzu explained that the work she had for them was a pinup photoshoot for a magazine in which the theme was 'Knights on Ice.' Since the theme was geared towards Knights, Izumi suggested that they should take on the offer. Leo agreed on how convenient the offer was to them, and to be on ice would perhaps spark inspiration for new music.

"Naru-kun has skating experience and Kuma-kun will probably be fine too. I'm not sure about Kasa-kun, but I can teach him if he doesn't know how to skate," Izumi rambled on. "Ou-sama, can you skate? It'll be embarrassing if you slip awkwardly. Do you want me to teach you along with Kasa-kun?"

Leo rejected his offer, stating how he has crossed and walked on ice before. "Oh, since we're going ice skating though," he began. "Shouldn't you ask (Y/N) if she wants to join?"

"We're going to be at the rink for work," said Izumi. "We aren't there to have fun."

But the mention of your name did make him think of whether to bring you along. Izumi knew how much you have always wanted to try ice skating, but since you were a soloist at Yumenosaki which took up all of your time working on perfecting your performances, you never really had the time to try out the activities you've always wanted to do.

Leo pointed a finger at him. "You know you want to, Sena! Come on, the client won't even be mad if we bring her along. She's (Y/N) (L/N) after all!"

Izumi flicked his hand away. "I know how much everyone's trying to get their hands on her," he said with a tone of annoyance in his voice. "...I'll think about it."

"Hahaha, so that's a yes then!" cheered Leo before realising that the two have been excluding Anzu in their conversation. "Oh, don't worry, Anzu. You won't get in trouble if we bring (Y/N) along. She actually knows the client very well, seeing that she keeps getting constant job offers, hahaha!"

"Anzu, you could come into the kotatsu instead of standing there like that," said Izumi before continuing on the subject at hand. "But if it does bother you, then we won't bring her–"

"Oh no, it's nothing like that," she said with a light chuckle. "I also got her a photoshoot at the rink too!"

Izumi was actually excited upon hearing those words. The next day, when he arrived at the ice rink, he scanned the area all over for you. Though, he wasn't only looking for you, but for Leo and Ritsu too.

Irked by their absence, Izumi sighed. "I've already given Ou-sama a warning, so I thought he'd be fine... He said he doesn't forget about the important things, but it has completely slipped his mind..."

Tsukasa went off to go find Leo whilst Anzu offered to find Ritsu. Izumi knew that Arashi had a photoshoot before this, so he wasn't too worried about her. But where were you? Anzu had informed him that your photoshoot was set an hour before his, so you would’ve been finished with it, right?

He would’ve called you, but he didn’t want to disturb you if you were still busy. Though, he sent you a text, hoping that you’d read it soon.

“Since we’re here at the ice rink, I guess I’ll warm up,” he muttered to himself.

Izumi kicked off his heel as he started to slide through the ice with grace. He circled the rink effortlessly, performing beautiful tricks with ease.

You watched him quietly from behind the barrier. Your photoshoot hadn’t even started despite it being booked an hour before. Since you told the client you didn’t know how to skate, they gave you an extra hour to learn which would’ve been nice of them, but they specifically said, “Alright, teach yourself then. We don’t have all day.”

This was the first time you’d ever dealt with a rude client, so your usual happy-go-lucky mood had shifted to a gloomy one. However, watching Izumi skate so elegantly made all those bad feelings go away.

You were amazed at how beautiful he looked as he skated. He was light on his feet, his movements mesmerising. You could watch him all day, but you knew you had to practise your own skills before you had to go back to your photoshoot.

Izumi wasn’t paying attention to his surroundings whenever he skated, he was only focusing on himself in that moment, but when he caught a glimpse of your silhouette, he immediately came to a stop.

His eyes lit up and his lips curled into a genuine smile. There you were.

“(Y/N),” he exclaimed. “I was wondering where you were. You must be finished with your photoshoot, right? So, why didn’t you reply to my message?”

You smiled at him sheepishly. “I… haven’t even started with my shoot,” you admitted. “…I don’t know how to skate after all, so they told me to go practise—”

“Wait, they didn’t have someone on the team to teach you?” he asked with concern in his voice.

“No… they told me to teach myself… I have an hour to do so.”

Izumi’s smile was wiped off his face. He had experience within the fashion industry and with modelling, so he knew how unprofessional it was for your client to not teach you how to skate let alone leave you to do it yourself.

He couldn’t believe that you were already having trouble with your client. He never wanted you to experience anything like that at work even if it was inevitable.

He was going to speak to the staff on your behalf right after he was finished.

But right now, he was going to teach you how to ice skate.

“Alright, get in the rink,” he said, skating towards the entrance. “I’ll teach you.”

You instantly smiled at these words, but you were still pretty nervous. You haven’t ice skated before and you were scared of falling. Falling in front of Izumi would be embarrassing too even if you two were close friends.

“You should’ve called me beforehand since Ou-sama and Kuma-kun aren’t here yet,” he continued. “But it’s okay, I can teach you how to skate in twenty– fifteen minutes.”

You hesitated. Your hands gripped onto the barrier as you tried to get into the rink, but couldn’t due to how frightened you were.

This is so embarrassing, you thought. I can’t even get in…

Izumi stretched a hand in front of you. “Don’t be afraid. Come over here,” he said gently with a smile on his face. “Just hold onto me, okay?”

You nodded, taking his hand as you entered the rink. He took your other hand in his as he glided you across.

You held his hands tight which stung him a bit. “(Y/N), relax. I won’t let you fall.”

“B-But this is scary!” you fretted, your grip tightening even more. “Izumi, please don’t let go of me…!”

“I wasn’t planning to,” he stated. "Alright, look straight ahead. Don't look at your feet even if you're scared. If you can't help it, then just focus on me."

You lifted your head a bit and locked eyes with him. His blue eyes mimicked the background the two of you were in right now. Despite how blue and icy his eyes looked, there was some warmness in them as they looked at you.

You blushed and instantly looked away.

"Ah, no. Don't look away!"

You couldn't help it. You were holding hands with him and now you were looking into his eyes? It seemed like the two of you were a couple with how close you two were together.

"People are going to take this the wrong way..." you muttered.

"So? Why not let them think that way?"

"...What?"

Izumi shook his head. "Let's get on with the lessons, okay?" As he kept hold of your hands, he taught you how to skate by bending your knees to keep your balance, then using your body weight from one side to the other to start moving.

He taught you how to glide and to stroke. It was difficult at first, but you were improving really fast. Midway through your session with him, you were getting the hang of it, but the two of you still kept your grip on each other's hands.

"Haha, this is so fun!" you chirped happily as the two of you skated around the rink together.

Izumi smiled. "See, it wasn't too bad, was it?" he said. "You're doing great... as expected from you."

"Thanks to you, of course!" Your fingers began to lock with his. "Izumi, thank you for teaching me, I really do appreciate it."

"Of course, anything for you," he replied, mumbling the last part of his sentence so you wouldn't pick it up.

"Now, let's spin!"

"Wait, what–"

You pulled your body weight to make the two of you start spinning. Unfortunately, since you were still a beginner, it did not work, so Izumi had to try to steady you both again before either of you fell.

"(Y/N)!" he exclaimed. "You're always like this..."

"S-Sorry, I got too carried away..."

"If you wanted to spin, then you should've let me do it."

Izumi had let go of one of your hands but kept a soft grip on the other. He brought you closer to him and then lifted your hand to twirl you around.

It was a short twirl, but it had excited you. It made you incredibly happy that even his cheeks were tinted with a soft pink colour.

"Haha, that was so cute!" you beamed. "Let's do it again, please?"

Izumi just couldn't say no to you, so he twirled you again, and you looked beautiful. Even with the coat hanging over you, you looked beautiful to him. Your eyes glistened as you looked at him, and he fell for you all over again.

"Again!" you squealed.

"Don't you have a photoshoot to be getting ready for?" he said with a slight smirk. "Our lessons were over once you started spinning us around."

"Oh, right! My photoshoot!"

Izumi sighed. You reminded him so much of Leo, but at least you didn't cause trouble.

"Have a good photoshoot," he told you, lifting your hand up to his lips before planting a soft kiss. "I'll be here waiting for you once you come back."

Your cheeks were hot even when the rest of your body was cold, yet you couldn't stop smiling.

"Izumi..."

"Off you go then."

Your hands parted from his even if the two of you didn't want it to.

You waved him a short goodbye before skating back to your preparation team. He watched you trail off as you began to get ready, slipping off your coat to reveal the dress you were hiding underneath. You really were breathtaking.

"I found Leader," said Tsukasa as he began to berate the Knights' leader on why he kept getting lost every single time they needed him. Anzu was dragging a coffin in which Izumi assumed Ritsu was sleeping inside.

Once Ritsu woke up, Izumi informed the staff that they were all here. Arashi had been waiting inside for them for a while now.

"I didn't know (Y/N) was doing a photoshoot here as well..." Arashi whispered into Izumi's ear. "She's pretty, isn't she?"

Izumi flinched at this, but calmed down almost immediately.

"Let's just do a good job, okay?" he said.

Your photoshoot lasted longer than you expected, but you preformed well especially since you had help from Izumi earlier. The client was a little bit nicer to you this time, but even if they continued to be rude, you wouldn't let it get to you. Nothing could sour your mood now once Izumi left a kiss on the back of your hand.

Knights were finished with their photoshoots too, even the one where they competed against UNDEAD.

You skated towards the crowd, waving your hands at them to notice you.

"Ah, here comes (Y/N)-chan~" sang Arashi, teasing her silver-haired friend. "Uwa~ her dress is sooo cute~!"

But before Izumi could reply to her, you had slipped. "(Y/N)!" cried Izumi, rushing towards you.

"Ow... ow..." you hissed. I guess I'm still not cut out for this after all.

"You okay?" he asked you worriedly, crouching down on the ice as he lifted your back. "Nothing's broken, I hope?"

"N-No, I'm fine," you replied. "Although this IS kind of embarrassing... I was hoping not to fall today and I was doing so well..."

Izumi chuckled as he leaned down closer to you, hugging you ever so slightly. You were surprised by this affection, but you weren't complaining. You rested your head on his chest, finding comfort in his grasp.

"You did do well and I am so proud of you."

You grinned up at him. "I like it when you're like this," you began. "You could be so sweet..."

"Haha, alright. Let's get you up," he said, noticing how much you were shivering. However, you kept him in place before the others could check up on you two.

"Izumi."

"Hmm?"

"I like you so much."

Now it was his turn for him to turn red. Hehe, revenge, you thought. But you weren't lying when you told him you liked him – you really did like him. You wanted to hold hands with him again, to be within his comfort again.

"I like you too, (Y/N). I always have."

[Extra]

Izumi didn't inform you about this, but he did speak with your client before your photoshoot officially started. He berated them on how unprofessional they were with you, and how they should've had someone on the team to help you with skating instead of leaving it to your own hands.

He didn't want you to experience any more rudeness from them as he knew you wouldn't be able to stand up for yourself. It was one of the ways he wanted to protect you, and it worked because you couldn't stop smiling at him throughout the rest of the day.

Hand in hand, the two of you left the ice rink together with Knights, your fingers interlocked with each other.

Intro page | Ensemble Stars masterlist | Rules

[corrupted-creatures]

BRO I LOVED THE SWATCHTON RAMBLE I'D LOVE TO HEAR WHATEVER ELSE YOU ARE PARTICULARLY AGITATING ABOUT W THEM/GEN

Literally anything you want to talk about

(Sorry for the delay!! Got busy IRL and haven't had the time or brain power to sit down and write this out)

AHH I'M GLAD YOU LIKED IT!! I was hoping I got my point across in an understandable manner!

As for swatchton thoughts, I have been thinking a lot about them and the role the machine/NEO body has played in their relationship and individual lives... (most of what's ahead is not particularly based in canon and is just a result of me thinking about these guys A Lot) [Long post ahead once more]

I've always believed that the machine holds a lot of personal significance to Swatch. They aided in its creation, after all, only for it to end up in the basement. While I don't think Swatch has the sort of religious reverence for the machine (and the Light World in general) that Spamton does, they do still hold Lightners in high regard, which I'm sure extends to Lightner creations as well. The machine, with all of its power and history, commands respect regardless.

I've mentioned it before in a post or two a couple of years ago, but I like to believe that Swatch visits the machine when they've had a long day and need some alone time. Not only is the basement it's housed within quiet and virtually inaccessible to all but a select few, but Swatch's personal sentimentality towards the machine makes it all the more soothing when they're stressed.

Spamton was, most likely, incredibly stressed out during his big shot days. He was juggling a massive amount of success he'd never experienced before with keeping the "recipe" to this success under wraps, all while dealing with the fallout of his broken relationship with the Addisons. We know Spamton would vent to Swatch about these things thanks to the Spamton Sweepstakes Q&A. We also know that the machine is a closely guarded secret that Spamton somehow found out about.

What if, as Swatch and Spamton grew closer and Swatch began to trust Spamton to a greater degree, they told him about the machine.

Spending time with it was how Swatch de-stressed, so perhaps they brought Spamton to it after he'd had a particularly rough day. In my mind, Spamton was a bit of an egotistical ass at this time, but not really mentally unstable, so Swatch had reason to believe Spamton would not do anything with the machine. They trusted him, after all.

Perhaps the two of them made a habit of spending time down there. They would share what was bothering them, joke around, fall for each other, you know the drill. It was wonderful for a time, and while Spamton certainly took more of an interest in the machine than Swatch expected, it wasn't anything to worry about.

...Until the voice on the other end of the phone line went silent.

That's when it all began, really. The desperation, the reverence, the begging, pleading, praying. That's when the obsession began– with the machine, with the light, with Heaven. Spamton was losing it all, and he couldn't do a thing. Nobody could.

Swatch bore witness to it all, at least all that happened within the mansion. They wanted to help, even as Spamton distanced himself from everyone and even after he was evicted, because Swatch still trusted him. They loved him.

But then Spamton began breaking into the mansion. He began impersonating Swatch. He began trying to steal the machine for his own goals. And Swatch's trust was eroded.

And when Spamton finally got ahold of it... well, the mere thought is almost too much for Swatch to bear.

The machine, the NEO body, lies at the heart of their mutual trust issues I think. It's something that they bonded over once upon a time, but as things started falling apart it drove a wedge between the two. It holds value to the both of them in such differing, conflicted ways. It represents both of their hopes, dreams, insecurities, and flaws. The machine was, and always will be, a broken dream at the end of the day.

(A lot of this post was sort of Swatch-centric but I have so many thoughts about Spamton with regards to the NEO body as well that I'll have to get into at some point)

Thank you so much for the ask!! Feel free to send in more if you want to pick my brain about them or if you have thoughts of your own!! (And this goes for anyone)

[nyrlthtp]

Having lots of thoughts about Mordecai...

While the System AI is more predictably sydbait, and while I adore the AI for all its freakishness and messy depth, I do think Mordecai maintains the "favorite character" spot for me. Putting my thoughts under the cut because there are some things about the seventh book mixed in.

Maybe it's just that I'm not immune to the Sad Dad trope at the end of the day. Maybe it's that "by his left tit" is the funniest exclamation ever. Maybe it's the grudges he's been holding onto, or the sadness he's been nursing for so long.

What's interesting is he doesn't have a parent/child-related backstory that others do—Maggie My or Frank Q, or Katia, or even Miriam Dom (albeit hers was related to fur-children). His story only ever involves his brother, and Chaco, and Odette, and Huanxin. So this paternal nature is based on nothing more than how much he cares.

And he's aware of that, too. It's why he gets so angry when Donut makes him her Manager. It's why he's so annoyed about letting the NPCs into the safe room. It's why he comes across as such a grumpy hardass—because he knows he'll get attached, and he knows the crawl kills many more people than it will ever let go. Caring about NPCs is a fruitless endeavor to him, and getting too attached to Crawlers is just setting himself up for more hurt when they die.

And that caring has to be why his anger at Chaco and Odette (and Huanxin, but that is slightly different) is so vitriolic. They weren't just random people; they were people he trusted, people he cared about, because he's incapable of not caring. And then, from his point of view, they betrayed him and killed his brother. It wasn't a random grudge; it was a betrayal of his love and care.

And that is why he is so adamant that Carl can't save everyone. He knows, firsthand, that people will turn on each other when things get too dire, and caring for everyone will only hurt worse in the long run.

But he also can't resist his own nature. From playing movies early on for the NPC children, to inviting other NPCs into the safe room as part of his own idea, to holding and reading to Ruby at what felt like the end of the world, to getting directly involved in a possibly-futile effort to save Louis.

There really is no point in this rambling, except to say that I love Mordecai so much. Despite that "deep well of sadness" Carl saw in him, filled as it is with all the loss he's experienced, and despite knowing that the loss toll can only keep going up the more he cares, he still does. While he did what he could to maintain distance at a professional level as Game Guide, once he was Donut's Manager (and only after he went through his drunken bender to cope), he didn't bother trying to maintain distance. He was in it. It was too late.

All he could do were the only things he's ever been able to do: care, and help.

[purpleglitch]

READ @demonstars 'S ROLESWAP!DNF FIC RIGHT NOWW!!!!

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Ok warning this is very long, i'm gonna ramble about the fic on itself here because UGFHGHHG i cried 😢💖 nunki tqm te debo mi vida entera

Starting with RS!George's pov during the prison break i love that so much, he's so chaotic in this au i really liked how he's the main focus :((( ohhgg the scrungly, and besides dnf being the main relatioship of the story i can't stop thinking about the silly dynamic of george and techno and the vibe of "we're not that close but you're my best friend's lover so i'll help you i guess :/", and them immediatly rushing to hana kingdom looking for dream with the compass.

THE VISUALS!!!! i love love love how it was all described, the imagery, all the plants and flowers surrounding the castle and after reading it, thinking how a big part of it was probably HD's influence on the world trying to keep dream hidden (and trapped), the fact that the kingdom was meant to be a safe place for "war criminals" according to dream, and they both thinking he meant a safe place for george,,, hheartbreakign reading about sapnap's absence in the kingdom to keep an eye on dream and also not appearing during the chase to capture george after breaking out of pandora like MAN. (also FUCK Q) my poor fucking cat george dealing with so much pain for a year im goign to throw uo :(

george knows thanks to techno that dream is going to welcome him back with open arms but still he's scared of the small possibility of dream not being in his room and all the scenarios of why that would be, but not wanting to show that panic to techno so he covers it with insults and deflection. and how for a split second he thought the worst case scenario happened and someone killed dream on their way there (ALSO GEORGE'S PARANOIA MENTION :c ). I love the imagery of dream being like the sun for the flowers and how even the sunflowers are ignoring the actual sun to point directly to a sleeping dream, they're dependent on him, like the world's connection and pure love for its admin but amplified by HD's wish to keep him for himself (or i'm reading too much into it lmao).

I keep thinking about the rs!dteam flashback because it's making me insane,, sapnap adoring dream's admin powers but george not caring too much about it because he cared more about dream himself, and deciding that he's going to protect him and sapnap following him and training together to become dream's bodyguards and if i keep talking about it i will burst into tears,,,,,,,

the fact that the flowers and vines and plants are covering dream even blooming from his own chest and holding him down as he sleeps,,, this would go hard as a painting like if you agree. but also george defending dream and how HE is the one that knows dream the best not even any of their other closest friends like sapnap, punz or even techno, his jealousy demons are insane like if you agree. I also kept jumping on my seat whenever i noticed a referenced to lore we've talked about before like the dnf chains and dream pleading techno to rescue george from pandora ooohhggg the details,,, and techno joking about how it's the last time he does dream a favor but deep down he also cares about him that's his dearest rival and he really doesn't want him suffering :((

PAUSEEEEE I LOVE THE STORYY OF HD, XD AND PVP AND THEIR BATTLE FUCKKKK i was thinking about it because i didnt know what to do to make both pvp and xd die so hd could become a lonely god (and also applying it to dsmp canon with dreamxd) and this way is SO GOOD!!! they were doomed and my chest hurts thinking about them, “Sometimes people do stupid shit for those they love, I dunno,” I'm biting my arm off oh my gODDDD.

AND NOW HD'S BIG ENTRANCE YASSSS, and the reveal of george having talked with hd multiple times in prison and his warning of staying away from dream, and how possesive he is with dream while he's sleeping, I LOVEEEE the way it's added the uncanny valley to hd's appearance, it's my fav hc how xd and hd look so perfectly like dream and george to the point of no humanity, their faces so perfect it's evident they're pretending to be human, trying to replicate all in looks and flaws, like george's pride, and george defeating hd by making him realize that dream never cared for him, he only wanted george and only wanted hd because he was replacing george but also hd wanting dream because he was replacing xd after he died.

and george realizing that it's his fault dream got hurt by hd and him during the dethronement so he wants to free him and let him choose next even if it meant him staying away from george, that's why george telling hd that "life moves on" also soothes his soul, they both lost their lovers (by not being able to stop his fight against their other friend, and by trying to keep him away from conflict he drove him away) so george thought he also needed to move on if dream hates him because of what he did. but finally dream wakes up as hd's curse is lifted and he doesn't hate george, he's angry because he left and didn't came back for him (until now) and they still have feelings for each other YIPPEEEEEEE

can i say that i imagine off screen dream and george taking a bath together and dream tending george's wounds from torture and putting bandages on him and they're soft and cute and cry and TALK and it's an intimate moment where they connect again and it's a new beginning for them together again <3

and george's version of the gods story having a happy ending, giving hd his own happy ending too :( and it's what he believes as the story is mentioned to have multiple versions, so i think that as long as george believes that HD XD and PVP lived and are happy, it would be true :) or idk at this point i kinda zoned out i probably misinterpreted this LMAO SORRYYYY. but anyway DNF CUDDLING!!! THE REAL GOOD ENDING!!! and finally,,,,, dream is finally free from hd's curse to sleep for longer, the flowers are gone. he's gonna wake up to an embrace of his lover and start living <3

I BELIEVE IN HAPPY RS!DNF ENDGAME!!! AGAIN THANK SO MUCH FOR THIS FIC I KEEP SAYING THIS EVERYWHERE I CAN BUT IM SO GRATEFUL FOR THIS AND ALL THE ART YOU'VE MADE AND FOR LISTENING (reading¿) MY SELF INDULGENT STUFF 😭😭💖💖💕💕 i hope this made sense i started zoning out at the end of writing this so i'm really sorry if i misinterpreted some scenes!!! feel free to correct me nunkito :3 and thank u nov for hosting dtblr secret santa i loved this,, ooghghgg

[datastate]

(sending this as an ask because it got WAYY too long to be a reply whoops) i really like your opinions on the routes!! especially on the ais waugh…. i am planning on playing kanna's routes whenever i eventually replay this summer + i am excited to see what they entail…. but yeah overall i really like your thoughts and man do i need to replay yttd T_T it has been so long. (+ this is where the reply turned into a small ramble about qtaro because the autism) plus your comment about how the main games have gone + the qtaro thing. sorry i am ill about him. glad to see someone who understands his intent there because although i am not active in fandom ANYMORE i used to see so many people absolutely hating him for that (<- like obviously not the best way of going about things but he had intentions. okay?) (also i would like to make the comment of although in 8th grade i had intense hyperfixation on alice, ever since my first playthrough in 6th grade (HOW HAS IT BEEN THAT LONG?!) qtaro has + always will be my favorite sorry society….). i still remember when 3-1b came out + so many people were like "oh maybe qtaro is not deplorable" meanwhile i was over here #1 qtaro fan sobbing. sorry this is so long

(in response to this ask! also, for my own sake, i've broken up replying this into little sections :] <3 but i don't mind at all!!!)

REPLAYING YTTD

oho...!! i do think even a general replay (without seeing other routes) is really worthwhile to get a better feel for the characters & see how you can recontextualize things they're doing/have said at the time... i love combing through to see what nao and kai were up to in particular just before the main games <3

while i do think there was more that nankidai could've stood to do to differentiate the two routes particularly to make kanna & shin's separate routes feel like an actual choice, i do think that what small things are changed are still worthwhile & cool to see! i hope you enjoy your replay!!! :D

Q-TARO

YEAH exactly... i'm really sad that it's taken until his literal death to truly appreciate him as a character when more morally ambiguous characters like... well. shin, keiji, and even kai (though i'd honestly argue that most people don't see kai for who he is, you know; rather they place emphasis on his attractive appearance...) -- what they've done & how they behave are excused because they're, frankly, thin enough to care abt.

i've gone on about this before, so i won't linger much more than i need to, but i find it so strange that most people don't seem to recognize that - if not in the moment, i can understand that everyone's emotions are in a swirl. even the player's, but in chapter two when he says he felt a connection w kai - q-taro is autistic. and this definitely makes how he approached things in the first main game all the more understandable, personally... being so blunt about it when he'd settled on it being the clear solution, he even outright says that he doesn't want to see any of them just resign themselves right away to being voted out! & then we learn in ch3 as well that he's also experienced suicidal ideation which just lends so much more value to what he says...!! he doesn't want anyone to die, but certainly not with the belief that it's the only option they had. he wants them to at least have the chance to fight, just in case. and he's willing to hold himself to the same standard!

of course, first impressions mean a lot, but i feel like people saw this and completely missed the entirety of chapter 2 where he quickly warms up to gin afterward & even apologizes to sara for all she's had to deal with, despite it not being his fault, and expressing that he wishes there was something he could do even irt miley... he cares so much abt the kids within the group, even if it takes a lot of courage to support strangers when he knows he has other kids waiting at home for him... he still tries his damnedest, you know? i feel like there's something about that you have to respect. even when he's attempting to leave, you visibly see how conflicted he is about it & it's why sara can pick up on it so early, because he doesn't want to do this, it just feels like the only option... which. well. there's something to say about how gin's the one who's freely handing out tokens and yet q-taro goes to someone like sara first. someone who's been steadily pushed into the figurehead of the group, who is clearly strategic... versus someone who resembles the people q-taro's trying to get back to. hmmm. i sure wonder what the implications are here. (& i have a post for you. that you might enjoy... i've been meaning to write it for a while but i forget. but the idea is there.)

but. yeah... they didn't give him much room to grow in their mind after this point, which is so disappointing & definitely created a very toxic space. beyond that, it played into general southern stereotypes of him being the only homophobic/transphobic one, which i honestly often find treatment of to be in poor taste (it can be used well in stories, but you shouldn't just. throw bigotry on characters simply because you hate them...) -- but also just. blatantly untrue?

even just. everything about his treatment of people in general being so understanding once you explain something to him, or his desire to be a good person worthy of looking up to (which is why it doubly wrecks him when he sees himself become disabled/suicidal in the hospital, because he's become such a rotten person and he feels it and it's a terrible, terrible cycle) for the orphanage kids & to prove something to the parents who abandoned him that he's still worthy of being loved too... he believes in equivalent exchange in social dynamics, only ever giving out what you can take, just... in what world would he be so insensitive?

and this isn't even bringing up the fact that he has slightly longer than shoulder-length hair + nonetheless treats kai/mishima with a lot of respect and care even with them both generally being considered (physically, as well as in their demeanor) strange. combined with the fact that he relates to kai on the basis of being "lonely" rather than "loved" for what's unchangeable about them... there's so much there to read into. not just with autism or ptsd, but. gestures. transgenderism, being mixed, so on. things that sara had people to help support her with prior to the death game, or that she lacked altogether (if she's fully japanese)

but i digress! i'm glad that ch3-1 skirted some hatred toward him, but i definitely agree -- he's such a well-rounded characters even prior to that & it deserved to be acknowledged...!!

[driftingvoid-155]

Your dead like me au got me thinking and now I'm curious about Liz and Mike's relationship once they meet up again. Like, is mike (justifiably) terrified of his wire monster of a little sister? Does Liz ever realize just how much she hurt her brother? Do they ever make amends?

Also! Does mike still have a hollowed out body? Does he acknowledge it? Use it? Does Charlie and/or phone guy hide in there? Does liz!? (Later of course, if they ever address the trauma.) Does Jeremy even know about it?

I have so many thoughts and questions.

Hi!! Thank you for your questions!!! I'm so excited to answer these. Okay, gonna break it down:

Q: Liz and Mike's relationship once they meet up again? Like, is mike (justifiably) terrified of his wire monster of a little sister? Does Liz ever realize just how much she hurt her brother? Do they ever make amends?

It's strained between them at first. Mike is still nervous about what she did to him and that there might be a repeat of what she used the funtimes to do. He never really voices this outloud, but its a subconcious fear that he has and is one he feels a little guilty about feeling. Becasue that's his baby sister and he knew she wasnt thinking right, especially after learning more about ghosts and how they operate, but he still can't help but feel a baselevel fear about what she did and about what she could be capable of doing in the future.

Liz tho, is still scared. She was desperate to get out from under circus babys and once she does, she basically never stops running. She never stays in one place too long, terrified someone will find her and bring her back and she doesnt trust anyone. She hides from any humans she comes across and this makes it very hard in tracking her down once Mike and the gang try doing so.

Upon meeting again, it takes a bit for Liz to recognize him, even as the man that she killed to escape (already her memories from then are hazy and so full of emotion, its hard to focus them) but after it's explained with the help of Charlie, she feels awful about what she did, both to escape and that it was her brother she did it to, and Mike of course immediately forgives her. From there, even though they hold some hesitencies towards each other, they do try to start making amends and becoming brother and sister once again.

Liz up until this point had bascially been running on fear and emotion but once she's in the same safe place for a bit, she starts to remember a bit more and function on a more human mentality rather than a ghost one and this allows her and Mike to connect once again. She'll constantly asks him about their family and have him confirm whether or not something is real or if she remembered right. It mostly only becomes strained when it comes to their father as Liz only remembers him as the loving dad he was to them, nothing else, and has a hard time wrapping her mind around the truth of what their father really was. Something Mike's lenient with her on because under it all, the metal, murder, and being a ghost, she really is just a scared little girl that wants her family and life back and he is a brother that wants to give that to her even if is impossible to completely do so.

Q: Does mike still have a hollowed out body? Does he acknowledge it? Use it?

Yes he does! I actually just rambled a bit about Mike and how he now operates here! He doesn't necessarily 'use' the hollowness of it as he keeps it mostly stitched up (except for when he caves and munches on some popcorn and then later has to dig it out).

Does Charlie and/or phone guy hide in there? Does liz!?

Uh.. not as of right now lol. Is kind of a cool concept tho and one I might keep in the back of my mind just in case a scenario ever comes up lol (thanks for the idea!)

Does Jeremy even know about it?

Yup! Jeremy, as a vampire, is completely aware of what Mike is.

Thanks for the questions! These were fun :) Any more and you know where my ask box is!

[yuukimiyas]

hi chloe !! first of all i am forever obsessed with ur theme <33 SO PRETTY !! AND THE SELFSHIP ART AAA !!!

second of all :3 for ur ask game, could you answer fantasia and dumbo? ^_^ LOVE YA !

aims my love!! ☆૮꒰ˊᗜˋ* ꒱ა hehee tysm!! i felt it was high time i put my comm on display ꒰♡˃̶̤́ ꒳ ˂̶̤̀ ꒱ OMG!!! OKAY THESE Q'S!!! IM OBSESSED!!! <33

fantasia - a song that reminds you of your f/o? omg okay!! this is probs gonna be a lil long so i apologize ૮⸝⸝> ̫ <⸝⸝ ა SO for lover boy, there's a TON of songs that remind me of him!! but the first 3 that come to mind are: is it really you? by loathe, sextape by deftones & shades of cool by lana del rey!! there's just smth ab these that scream 'late nights, long drives, fancy events & soft slow dances in the kitchen' ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა & for kenyū its gotta be: dizzy vision by dev lemons & sweet disposition by the temper trap <33 there's lyrics in both of these that just speak to my soul w yukimiya!! i could simply write a dissertation on how & why these songs for these 2 but i'll refrain from makin this too long hehee ໒꒰ྀི ∩ ⸝⸝ ∩ ꒱ྀིა

dumbo - what stands out to you the most about your f/o? i could also list 100 for these for reo but it'll stick to a select few :3 firstly! just how motivated & driven he is! despite having the world handed to him on a silver platter, he is still so hard working toward what he wants & not what others expect from him! secondly! its gotta be how sweet, kind & polite he is ૮꒰๑´ ˋ๑꒱ა (when he's not on the pitch ofc lmaoskddj) he listens intently, genuinely asks how i'm doing, holds the door open for me, & lots of other gentlemanly things!! <33 sigh i ADORE him!! for dream boy kenyū its gotta be the way he looks at me! he sees me like i've hung every star in the sky just for him! (it's true, too!) ꒰✿´ ꒳ ` ꒱♡ his view on the world def changed after learnin ab his eyesight problems & it def shows in his sweet lingering gazes he gives me when we're flipping through vinyl at our fave record store & he thinks i can't see him out of my peripheral (∗˃̶ ᵕ ˂̶∗) & also! how attentive he is to my needs! whether it's anticipating what i need before i need it like water, food, a hug or just listenin to me ramble on & on ab my fave tv show or movies, he's always giving me what i need x 10 <33

[randomclam24]

My positivism (and it's not positivity, because that's a resting state) forsakes that there *is* a society If I just ramble things off the top of my brain, it is humiliating update - I found whole Milk at aldi Update - You just have to remember, when things being remembered in life from when we had emotion give us feelings, these equivalents in the real world, even Toy Story, have theoretical meaning

I don't see - why don't people have meaning in the real world - theoretically that should have been cut off - they were just - it's too late

Update - I'm tired of thinking it isn't People who get a day job get thrown to the wayside "Band on the Run" was written about blackmail

and that goes for just about any song - Common Filth says children were originally born for a household purpose - that *is* [the case (here) If you're under blackmail, they care

The hornets event is coming back If you make a decision against the jew, technically you are under blackmail - I just have to smuggle a bit further after bro falling off - I just have to forget it The second you touch drugs, which is Synthcool saying Persona, parallel to Synthcool timing "military" - these are synchronous[alright he's cutting off in his video communal-realizing consensus They're looking for Alright, where the military - shut up Alright - if I cry for *help* - they *are* - they're - I'm their I know Aliester Crowley's rewrite of the Satanist agenda, look for your inner love, then what thou wilt, do, is the reason for the cutoff, not *noT GETTING IN TRWUBBLEEeee!!! BOO MOMNMY This is trail crumbs for then

Update - Didn't take too long!

example footage

I say "that's politics, that's not what we're talking about" ("if only things could In reality, the meme "everything has to be political"(and it does For the slow, political means the opposite on my rail Politico! Puh

In my life, what thou wilt, do, means adults plop you down, *hold

Update so, like, childhood fischer price o algo https://duckduckgo.com/?q=fischer+price+great+adventures+pirate+ship+dragon&t=ffab&iax=videos&ia=videos&iai=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DmAREaLU9E5w so youtube won't advertise (on account of the annoying, someone gets mad and shoves an infinite number of pens in your eyes

upDate

there's something infinitely funny about someone saying oh i'm a jartycuck

Update - just the childhood memory makes me think the parrot is edible Oh yeah and the penguins say stinky cheese until their butt turns red For some reason, I thought coins and such-shaped jewels especially for pool toys would be better eaten Update - I'm serious about reviewing it For whatever reason it is, top-budget movie adaptations - okay so I'm being very untrue to myself - my mind is cursing This on the other hand has a good color palette - I had to cut mine self off

You just admitted to teh greatse evil. Not even Hitler

We trannies keep our selves.

Update - >Look at these photos of white class domestic America <You'll find yourself there FUCK NO YOU WON'T Update - The facefagging when you realize that the "STFU" song was about coming off way too white like this game meanwhile two gay non-chromosonmes

Well no It's just that this kind of white-talking from white games from 1999 cover over war crimes

Update - Really, though, the vibe of these fixed-camera scenes was used for horror as well, just not deliberately There's an uncanniness to the use of scenes, such as where the wrong sound is playing, it can kind of say "this we would never

This is now a war on the factions of Charles Manson versus the Saturday Night Live pressing crew for dignifying their asdfasdfasdf Blackmail, being represented as the mob culture for when you' George Bush's statement about how if the American people knew what we have done, they would hunt us down in the street and lynch us, is the finalizer - there aren't any people who would rape the world establishment that aren't white Cancel culture is that blackmail be the will[I'm - it cut off - down to this root, then my identity is handle? I'm a handler - Bingo - say it - I'm a handler

Update - Your parent or something tells you to stop - 26:42 or something - now this is a game changer Update - Since the sharty is as defeated as one who has been sentenced to hell which doesn't exist . I'm going to sacrilege their arguments since they're plastic disposable trash Keyed things: feeding the parrot an infinite number of crackers

Update - How to understand the "incomprehensible" of "sociopaths" in uh, marketing Nobody gets the "you fall out of society enough, it wraps around and becomes a good thing" Having acknowledged the barriers that define a crisis to pleboids which don't exist in the literal reality, you treat the onset to these as barriers while in fast motion which to them doesn't exist

So yeah, if you're onset, you don't have any nation to which you can go Update - I'm not dead [] Update - All the videos don't include the stinky cheese drop I'm looking at the versions. When I get the eww stinky cheese drop, everyone has to say up

Update - When even the .dir files can't be run for sample

">There's literally nothing I can think of that's more cringe than some genetic dead end socially outcasted low status loser trying to "self improve" to fit into society. It's like they're so far off the mark I don't even know where to begin with them. >The average person, and even the above average, just exist and the things that you consider "normal" just happen to them. No high schooler ever had to go out of his way to get a girlfriend, he just existed, thought it would be cool and fun to play sports, and a girl was attracted to him and they gravitated towards each other. There's no thought out into any of this, these things just happened through the natural flow of life, no "self improvement" necessary. That's what happens when you're not a genetic dead end mentally ill freak, you don't ever find yourself one night lying in bed alone wondering why you don't have a single friend or you've never kissed a girl at 23 years old. You don't devise a plan to stop touching your cock for six months in order to look a girl in the eye. You just exist, you go with the societal flow, and you end up with a wife, a nice job. a house, and some kids. If you missed out on this flow, it's probably because you're complete genetic raisin. >>wordswordswords didnt r-ACK" Update Well I did find it It was more lackluster than I thought The backstory is, I thought there was an underground cave in which all the penguins were hiding

Weirdly enough, all my media players just show a black screen The legend is called FLING3.MOV

Update! I'm finally out of having to put money down for this even though I'm out

[ahiddenpath]

IRL, is it possible to learn to sing at the same level as Eimi/Amy without the help of a singing teacher or coach?

I'm tossing this one beneath a cut because it's long and rambly, and I am not even sure if I answered exactly what you are asking. I apologize if I missed the mark.

But I love music and I love personal growth and learning, so I'm so happy you're thinking about it and asking these qs! I wish I were better equipped to answer, but I will try my best :D

I'm not sure... Eimi usually has formal and/or informal training. She takes formal university vocal training in Four Years and Seeking Resonance, and she did a lot of singing at school/theater club in high school in FY, plus practicing/working on singing and guitar by herself and with Matt since middle school. In Puits d'Amour, she got her knowledge from a kindly neighbor who shared her instruction and music resources, and then went on to formal training in university via scholarship. In the Growing Up with You line, she does a lot of singing in school/clubs from early elementary school, so she has the least formal training there. But every time I write Eimi, music is a big part of her life, even if it's just a hobby she practices alone or with choirs.

I'm not involved in the music industry or formal music/vocal performance criticism, so I'm not sure how much I can really comment without just... reaching/guessing? I imagine that the musicians we know have a broad range of formal training/backgrounds. Some probably went to a ton of formal schooling, some probably learned from family or taught themselves. Some maybe made a YouTube channel and blew up.

I do know that I took some formal singing training in college, and it was far less helpful than my casual, once-a-week coaching in high school. Were the college classes bad? Was my high school music teacher just a really great teacher? No idea! I do know my old guitar teacher told me that most guitarists can't read music, and being able to can help you land performance gigs, which to me implies a range of education.

While I do agree that there are probably folks out there born into wealthy and/or musical families who trained them since they could sing/hold an instrument... I think it's kind of sad to assume someone will never be an outstanding performer without that kind of background. But I don't think that's really what you're saying/asking, either.

Traditionally, music lessons, instruments, and travel for performances cost a lot of $$$. I'm not trying to downplay that. But the good news is that we are in an unprecedented time where there are lessons for free online, plus online classes available for a monthly subscription, which is a lot cheaper than music school. It's an incredible time to be learning music/an instrument/how to sing! There are also local performance choirs and groups, I belonged to one in college and it was a blast! If you're looking to improve (and please forgive me if I misunderstood you), then there are options, and some of them are low cost/free, and some of them are so much fun and will give you a community and people to learn from/grow with!

Basically, I think anything is possible if you work at it daily, take advantage of every resource you can find, and actively go for it and find a community. For me, personally, I have so much fun singing that it's never a waste, even if I'm not making huge improvement strides. But I also think the end goal matters, too. Like, are you looking for a fun hobby that provides a sense of growth? Or are you looking to become a famous/professional singer? For the first, anything is possible and it's so achievable! The second presents a lot more obstacles and requires luck/chance and the ability to market yourself, on top of everything else.

I have no idea if that was helpful, or if I really answered your q, but I'm wishing you fun and happiness in your musical journey! Thanks for the ask <3

[rosesloveletters]

Q, R, and U!

Hello, darling, Anaya🥺🥺 How are you, dear? I hope you're doing well on this fine Thursday!! Sending you lots and lots of love, good vibes and hugs. Thank you for asking🥰🥰 (any excuse to discuss Will & Jake👀)

Q-Question: If you have a question for your partner, how do they generally answer it? With a specific explanation, rambling, looking it up with you, etc.

Jakob: It depends on what my question is that determines his response method. Jakob is very well-educated and knows a lot about a lot of things; there's not too many things I could ask that he would not have some sort of answer for. If it's anything to do with writing, he's almost too eager to help. Usually with Jake, there's lots of rambling involved because his mind moves faster than his mouth whenever he's really, really excited.

Will: If I have a question that requires a direct, somewhat concise answer, I'll go to Will. My Wilhelm is very straightforward and to-the-point; he can even be rather blunt, depending upon the situation and what is being discussed. Will is just as educated as Jakob, though he will normally look things up with me if need be. He pays attention to detail, but things that don't require his immediate attention are things he will pass over and not commit to memory the same as Jakob does. Will does not know as much about story writing like Jake, but he is a master at proofreading and editing, so if my question lies in that department, he's my guy.

R-Reassure: How do you comfort them when they’re upset? How do they comfort you?

Jakob: Jakob likes to be cuddled when he's upset and will often crawl into my lap unannounced; I quickly put away whatever I was working on and focus on him and his needs. He likes to talk about the things that upset him because getting those things off his chest helps him feel less bothered by them; talking about it makes his troubles seem small enough to manage. He really likes having his hair played with or his beard scratched. Sometimes I can make him laugh by swapping our glasses and wearing his while he wears mine. He comforts me in much of the same ways. He likes to rub my back and he will ask questions to get me comfortable in opening up to him about what's going on; he'll kiss my neck and face until I'm smiling or until I hug him and hide my face in his shirt so he can't get to me to kiss me anymore. He also will read to me sometimes, if I want him to.

Will: Wilhelm is trickier than Jakob when it comes to him being upset. He doesn't like to discuss his troubles unprompted and I have to work hard at pulling them out of him if I really want to know what's going on. If I act really sweet and charming I can usually get him to do whatever I want, so I'll look at him sweetly and touch his face and he'll almost always start babbling away about whatever it is that's upset him. Will is very grumpy when he's upset about something but I don't let him get away with being mean to me or to Jakob, which he will try to do. He does like his alone time, so if he needs it I'll leave him alone to calm down or we will go for a walk together in silence until he feels right enough to talk to me. It's amazing how much hugs seem to help him too; he really likes long hugs. If I am the one upset, Will feels like he's got to jump in and act immediately. As the protector, he doesn't like to see Jake or I upset because of something he didn't cause or couldn't control. He will hold me like Jakob does and he'll talk to me gently because I like the sound of his voice.

U-UwU: Do either of you use emojis a bunch? If it’s a universe where phones don’t exist, do either of you draw little faces and symbols on letters? What does the other think?

Jakob: Jakob and I draw little notes in the margins or each other's journals all the time. Sometimes while he's asleep, I'll grab his journal and write him a lengthy love letter on some of the unused pages. If I look closely, there's lots of cute little doodles of our names together, mine with his last name. We draw tons of hearts on each other's work and write little notes to each other about anything and everything or we will make comments on each other's work for the other to find written around the text. Jakob's cursive handwriting is beautiful!

Will: Will isn't one for too many mushy notes or drawings, so I always leave him little doodles on blank pages that I stuff into his coat pockets while he isn't looking. Sometimes he finds them during meetings with townsfolk and he'll stand there blushing while he reads them, hoping no one notices the look on his face. He feigns exasperation as he shoves the note back into his pocket, sometimes rolling his eyes along with it, but he actually thinks it's sweet and he keeps every one that I write. If he's in a romantic mood, he'll write one back or make a little drawing for me, but the thing about Will is: his handwriting is horrible. And he cannot draw. At all. I love it so much because it's so him; he's embarrassed about his handwriting/drawing skills, but I always tell him how much I love it and that I want him to draw more things for me.

questions from: Mundane Selfship

[franeridart]

This might be too much to ask but I broke my laptop and only have access to mobile and I'm dying to know what I'm actually missing but I can't check would you be able to describe it? Sorry I know this is annoying ignore it if it's too much trouble

It’s not annoying so don’t worry about it, but my posts should all be visible, now? At least my app doesn’t give me the option to request a review anymore… if you can’t see them still they’re all (aside from the one I posted earlier) backed up on my wordpress blog! You can see them from there without me needing to describe them~

Anon said:Franeri-san what dimensions do you usually use for your canvas? When I draw I end up making the canvas too small, so when i zoom in to make details it becomes pixelated. But I also don’t need my canvas too big because I won’t be able to proportion it;; it’s a visual thing… Ah I’m rambling sorry

I use a 6000pxx5000px with a 4px brush, usually, but I really rarely use it all, mostly it’s just like, corners of the whole thing. I tend to draw a lot of things on the same canvas before switching to a new one - that said, personally I can’t draw properly if I don’t zoom in above 100% (usually I work at 150% or 200%, more for details) so I’m really not the right person to ask this haha

Anon said:I saw that profanity is now being blocked more heavily by safe search so our good, good but foul mouthed Baku may be the reason your stuff is hidden. You’ve probably already heard this but I thought I’d let you know~

Rip so I heard orz though let’s not give our Baku all the fault here, I swear a lot by myself too haha I’m my own ruin, seems like - thank you for taking your time to share the info, anyway!!

Anon said:I’m really happy about your blog not being censored seriously. CAUSE YOU MAKE WONDERFUL DRAWINGS THAT FILL MY HEART AND I WAS STARTING TO PANICK. Keep up the good work~. 🖤

And I’m really happy you can properly see my blog, you sweet sweet cute and adorable anon!!!!!!!!!! *O*

Anon said:Hello! First, I love your art and your headcanons and stories! I am in love with bakushima half because of you, you beautiful tart. Second, about Bakugo’s laugh, holy crikey, of course he’s loud and explosive. The boy is a ball of stress and anger and when he laughs for real, it’s rare and takes effort. But like, can you just imagine when his explodo-kill mask cracks his face turns red because he doesn’t want to laugh. But THEN he barks out a laugh and everybody’s stunned and then he just SNORTS

YES!!!!!!! Oh my god yes that’s an hc I have he definitely, definitely snorts when he tries to hold back his laughter it’s so effin adorable I die every day a lot bless that kid

Anon said:Who tops of in your opinion in Bakushima?👀

Maybe either, maybe neither, depends on many things but mostly on how I don’t ever ask myself this question for any of my ships so I got no answer for it at all ever - instead we should ask ourselves the important questions, like who opens the water bottles between them (Kirishima when Bakugou’s palms get too sweaty and Bakugou’s forever resentful about it), who kicks when they sleep and who always ends up sleeping on the floor because of it (Bakugou’s the restless sleeper, poor Kirishima), who takes way too damn long in the bathroom goddamnit Kirishima get out of there already I swear to go——-

Anon said:your blog makes me really happy just keep doing you you’re like the best thing

Thank you so much holy smokes!!!!!!!!!! *O*

Anon said:wait wait wait wait! is Bakugou the one teaching Shark Kirishima sign language?? then does that mean Kirishima learned to sign ‘I love you’ from Bakugou!? (Q/)////(\Q)

They’re learning together!! They have an online dictionary and follow online courses, so Kirishima kind of looked it up for himself at first - he was signing it as love instead of really like thoug, which made Bakugou indecently flustered so in the end, yes, he was the one to teach him how to properly sign it :D

Anon said:Will you still be updating this blog?

Sure will! The wordpress one is just a backup thing!

Anon said:wait so question: in the mer au, does kiri know jsl from before? because the way he reacted to bakugou first attempting to sign at him looked like he recognized it but you said they both had to learn? does he react like that because he recognizes it as bakugou actively trying to communicate? (btw this au is So Good i love how kaminari is just “why are you like this” at kiri but his Gay Ass cant be swayed)

I’m glad you like it!!!!! And nope Kiri didn’t know jsl from before, but mers do have something similar to a sign language (there’s deaf and mute merpeople too, after all) so he recognized it as Bakugou going “I want to talk to you and this is the best way to” - also, he’d never seen a tablet before and Bakugou was showing him an explosion on it to make him understand and instead he went��“what is this SORCERY” and got excited about a gif. Good, pure kid. I had no clue how to add that in the comic in a fast way tho so let’s leave it at him being happy they found a possible way to communicate haha

Anon said:Hi Fran!!! Hace you reas the theoriws aboyo kiri o kaminari Boeing traitors? Si you know where they came up? I’m lil bit lost even tho I’m up with the man lmao ALSO pls more maki-chan

So pretty much at some point in the middle of a meeting Present Mic mentioned how there probably was a traitor between them that kept on feeding the villains infos about UA, and the fandom of course got interested in that!! Who could it be? They started thinking it through and for some reason the theories that ended up being more popular are about it being either Kaminari, Kirishima or Hagakure - I don’t think any of these are true, but if you google search “kaminari traitor theory” or the same with the other two names you should easily find the posts explaining the theories and where they come from, if you’re interested!

Anon said:omg fran i haven’t watched/read bnha but still solely bc of your art i am IN LOVE with kirishima. he’s such a pure being I feel like crying every time i see him??? like i just watched the first opening of the anime and you bet i watched the 5 seconds kirishima gets over and over. like all the bnha kids seem great. i am somehow extremely motivated to read bnha now thanks to your art. BUT OH MY GOD KIRISHIMA I LOVE HIM SO MUCH WHAT EVEN

You picked the best fave you could ever pick, anon!!! Kirishima is the BESTEST boy, purest and brightest and energetic and actual sunshine and also super strong and resilient and kind of an ass now and again but in a good way he’s GREAT I’m IN LOVE with him good job your intuition is perfect

Anon said:THE MER AU WAS THE CUTEST THING EVER I LOVE SHARK KIRISHIMA AND THE TAGS ALL GAVE ME LIFE

GLAD YOU LIKED IT OMG!!!!!!!

Anon said:I love all your art, but especially all your self indulgent stuff bc first off HELLS YEAH DO THE STUFF THAT MAKES YOU HAPPY and another is it feels like self indulgent stuff for me but I’m not the one making the thing… So like… It’s Good™ BUT YEAH ANYWAYS I LOVE YOUR ART AND YOU AND YOUR ART MAKES ME HAPPY TBH I HOPE YOU’RE HAVING A LOVELY DAY

AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH also this is super nice to know because sometimes being self-indulgent is all I can manage to do haha r i p but at least now I’ll know you, for one, will like it!!! That’s nice!!!!!!

Anon said:If you were ever bored and wanted to do more of your mershark au thing I wouldn’t be mad at all ! 😝 your art is so cute and easily recognizable and I really enjoy it! Stay beautiful lovely Fran!

!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I really, really think I will!!!!!!!! :D

Anon said:I bet if denki tried to do the “if i jump at ______ they will most certainly catch me” with bakugou, bakugou would just let him fall

Oh my god no Bakugou’s reflexes and instincts are too fast and automatic the actual reaction at seeing someone run and jump at him would be without thinking trying to explodo-kill them don’t jump at him Kaminariiiii

Anon said: What to you think of a school dance bnha concept thing???

I read a bakushima about it once and I DIED so actually A++++ great perfect amazing concept I love it

Anon said:I gotta know,what do you think of the “Dabi is Todoroki Shouto’s brother” theory? i personally feel like that 1’s the most likely theory to become a legit thing but im curious

I talked about this on my main just the other day!! And added something about it earlier through another ask! But generally I think it’s believable, and I wouldn’t mind it being true :D

Anon said:But, what are your feelings about this chapters? And Kirishima? God, I love him even more and want him to be happy, but Im also dying to know what happened to him in his past!!

I CRIED I love that boy so much I swear it’s getting ridiculous I’m so so proud of him and how far he’s come and I just want him to be happy??? I do want to know his past tho!!! I’ve just been asking for this for, like, eight months!! I hope next one will be the one I’ll finally learn about my child tbh ;–;

Anon said:Fran you should totally do bnha and haikyuu calendars

………………..boi that sounds like a lot of work, anon. Like, it’s an interesting idea, but also my lazy ass is telling me no way no what the heck go to sleep instead r i p

Anon said:Have you ever thought of an eraser mic fusion?

I’ve drawn it already!!

Anon said:fran i?? i love the way you draw smiles?? idk i was just going through your art and i realized that holy SHIT i really love the way you draw smiles. like each smile is different and has its own specialty. esp bakugo’s smile I LOVE HOW YOU DRAW HIS SMILE!! like usually it’s not really noticeable but then there’s that slight quirk of his mouth (see what i did there?) and it’s so perfect. idk dude i just REALLY LOVE THE WAY YOU DRAW SMILES

THIS IS SUCH A CUTE ASK I DON’T KNOW HOW TO ANSWER HELP ME !!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you????? so much??????? I’m glad you like them cause honestly I love drawing people smiling and laughing, it makes my heart smile too~

Anon said:Theres a bnhaStuck blog in the works ;)

That’s? Nice! I guess!! I hope whoever’s working on it will have fun with it!!

Anon said:Fran this last BNHA chapter hurt so bad. And then I saw your mer-Kiri and it cheered me up!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m glad I could cheer you up cause honestly I felt that pain a whole damn lot too ;A; let’s hope Kiri won’t have to suffer much more in this arc #sob

Anon said:im crying fran, my hard bby kiri in the latest chap,,, my baby boi, i know that i wanted to know more abt him but,, keep my baby safe pls oh goodness gracious… (and as usual ur bootiful art keeps me alive)

I mean nearly all the character arcs we got are damn sad so it was obvious Kiri’s was going to be too, but still ;A; don’t make him suffer too bad Hori I beg u ;A;

Anon said:*takes deep breath* I FUCKING LOVE YOU SO MUCH THANK YOU FOR MAKING QUALITY ART OF MY FAVOURITE SHIPS YOU ARE SUCH AN AMAZING PERSON AND YOUR ART IS VERY PRETTY AND I JUST WANTED TO THANK YOU FOR EXISTING IN GENERAL BYe

THANK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO MUCH OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:!!!!!!FRAN!!!!!! YOUR MER!KIRI AU!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D I’m glad you enjoy it!!!!!! 

Anon said:I love your work 😍. You are the only one who makes comics About my favourite ships. I check your web everyday If you post something new. My fav ships are I.waoi, bok.uroo and bak.ushima. Love your work 🙂

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh thank you!!!! holy smokes!!!!!

Anon said:Do you have an OC for Boku no Hero Academy?

The closest things to bnha ocs I have are the fusions, right now, but there’s a couple of asks in my inbox about a bkkr kid… soon……..

Anon said:Quick question, I want to read haikyuu, I’ve watched the anime already and I was wondering how close the anime follows the manga, like how bnha is basically identical, is it the same? Or is there a bit of difference *^*

I’m SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME FOREVER TO ANSWER - I bet you already found your answer elsewhere, but anyway the anime is pretty much exactly the same as the manga!!

Anon said:Back on the topic of hq!!! I find it funny how people ask about bok.uroo so much as if you dont like them anymore when they’re literally still your header, like if you didn’t care for them they’d think you’d change it to bakushima or something

I’ve literally thought about changing my header so often but then I look at it and I’m like….. my kids………… I can’t do this………………. not yet…………………. same for my icon tbh haha I love them too much rip

Anon said:Okay but what if Kirishima makes a really stupid pun and Bakugou just turns away with a curse and he’s just covering his mouth and quietly giggling into his hand because even he can’t believe he found that funny, and that is SHAMEFUL. And Sero in the distance is just looking at him, all disappointed. Quietly judging the fact that Kirishima and Bakugou are practically meant for one another.

You wanna know the best thing the absolute best thing? My very first bnha comic was something eerily similar to the first part of this ask! Only Bakugou was the one to accidentally make a pun - I’d link it but honestly my style was ridiculous back then so not happening, just know that I’m 100% sure that post is the reason why I keep on drawing bnha comics about puns, my very first post set the path for all the others to come hah a curse I don’t actually mind

Anon said:are you planning on starting another series? like the bokuroteru tattoo shop au you did (it was real dandy and rad) it was what made me find your blog, so i was wondering if you have any future plans for anything similar. i really like your blog lots, i hope you have a nice day!

Right now I don’t actually have any idea orderly enought to make a proper series out of it, rip - maybe in the future, tho! That one comic was fun to make, after all!! And thank you!!!!!!!!

Anon said:IM HARDCORE IN LOVE WITH TODOSHIMA THANKYOU SO MUCH FOR RUINING MY LIFE❤️❤️

I’M GLAD YOU LIKED HIM OH M Y GODS!!!!

[fillorian-pocketwatch]

Yes. I know so many people felt similarly to the way I did. And we all have our own stories about how hard we were hit by it, and why, etc. Or some of us just *liked* Q and so were mad. And maybe that's the shittiest bit--the people who didn't seem to *get* Q at all, to really feel him or love him or relate to him--those were the people pulling the strings and making extreme decisions.

I guess if I were to make an analogy, it's sort of like...well, people in power who make decisions on a mass scale for those less fortunate, with zero context or empathy (lawmaking). And that, on a global scale, is so disheartening and life-draining and soul-sucking, and it's one of those things that leads to those of us with mental illness *not wanting to stick around.* So when we see this thing shrunken down to a mirror-sized scale and hurled at us, it feels personal. It feels like one more little message from the universe.

When I watched 4x13 last fall, I was struggling with an invisible chronic illness. I had been, for 8 years, without an answer or a diagnosis. Not being believed. Just seeing myself deteriorate. Still being young, but feeling/functioning like an elderly person (brain fog, moving slowly, constant joint pain, crushing fatigue etc)...and then I saw Quentin "sacrifice himself."

If I hadn't been in the headspace I was in at the time, just--being who I am, which is someone who has been clinically depressed just about all of my life, I would have related to it and hurt over it and been mad and taken it to heart etc. But it was especially crushing and heartbreaking last fall because I was seeing myself (in my own mind):

*Holding back the people I loved

*Literally taking away the things my partner wanted because I was physically incapable of "stepping up and being human"

*Sick? But not diagnosed? So maybe not sick? Maybe just incapable of functioning?

*Selfishly staying alive when the best thing I could probably do was die because no one would really miss me/be affected anyway, and though I need them they could surely get along fine without me and heal and move on and in fact have *better* lives without me around

So. Yeah. Quentin "sacrificing" himself (I've never been fully convinced of the "need" for him to do so; I think there were other solutions) was something I could relate to all too well.

I bet there were, in fact, suicides that were carried out as a direct result of 4x13. One little nudge or push someone was vulnerable to. And then, season 5. Season 5 should be fucking burned. They hardly spoke about Q. They hardly mourned him. Eliot's physical appearance was the one constant bit of testimony to the fact that everything was not okay. And why do I have this niggling feeling that Hale had something to do with that? Like he couldn't say a lot I'm sure if he didn't agree with aspects of how things were carried out, but I just have this feeling that he was so not okay on certain levels with a lot of it and if he could find some way to convey that to us then he would.

(I know wardrobe and makeup departments exist and decisions like this aren't solely Hale. But I still feel this, regardless. Just like it's obvious he wasn't totally cool with the Charleton thing at the end there. Microexpressions and acting choices are a thing.)

I'm rambling, but yes. The writers are clueless and as much as I love things about the show, certain moments, some of the characters etc, I'm so reluctant to revisit any aspect of the show or books now except these little hints, waves, and winks of emotion regarding them that have become part of the daily fabric of my life. Remembering, yearning, wishing. Listening to the audiobook of Brideshead Revisited. Admiring pretty clocks. A twinge when I hear or read the word "magic." Thoughts about college, of Q and Eliot secluded together before the school year was going to start in the first book.

And it's such a weird, weird feeling, this sense of being so alienated and removed from something I want to love wholeheartedly because it was obviously created by people who have no concept of/appreciation for what they made me feel. What they made so many of us feel. It's a feeling of being misled, gaslighted, of not being able to trust. This feeling of having walked into some huge joke. A room full of people posing as your friends who laugh their asses off about you every time you've left the room. It's such an uncomfortable, disconcerting, familiar love.

I'm rambling. But yeah. Sigh.

I miss Quentin so much.

I very distinctly remember seeing him die. I knew it was coming since I'd come to the fandom late, but the way the timing landed it was still unknowable and hit me in a way I couldn't brace for, because it was a horrible time in my life and I was suicidal as well. And I think I'll continue to remember it for the rest of my life as the time my friend died and all I wanted to do was follow.

So that's what it is.