#i realized pretty early on that i just kind of made zoe monster prom? which okay

[citruscore]

new teen just dropped

[rxttenfish]

i think my ideal for miravi, is they unintentionally go from strangers to annoyances to acquaintances to friends to lovers, and if you ask either of them when theyre on the verge of going into the next step, they will VEHEMENTLY deny it.

namely, i think they have to start out poking and prodding and annoying each other. like, theyre both PROUD. theyre both stubborn, and they are superficially very different from each other with different aesthetics. 

miranda mostly has issues with already assuming she's superior to people (and especially people she doesn't know yet) and will unintentionally show it a lot, and being underestimated and put down is the kinda shit that REALLY gets on aaravi's nerves. 

they also generally like challenges. aaravi's fairly obvious, and miranda likes to feel like a conquering party. she comes from a militaristic kingdom, she likes forcibly exerting her will and superiority, she likes KNOWING how to destroy someone and ruthlessly executing it.

however, at this early stage of just knowing each other, they havent really sunk under each other's skin yet. 

miranda in particular- she doesn't like feeling like her hand is being forced. she's all about power and control and, namely, she doesnt actually go all out when she's actually upset by something? i've noticed this a lot, but while miranda has all the power and position of vera and possibly even more, when she's actually angry or hurt, she tends to... close off. pout, i guess. she only ever gets elaborate and extensive in her cruelty when she feels confident about it, and tends to close off otherwise. 

to her, this is more about fun. she's not really feeling anything more complicated than a cat wanting to push a glass of water off the table. this annoyance and this pride sits more in the realm of dramatics and being able to make a show of it without actually risking her pride, and having aaravi push back just makes it more enticing for her to try and figure her out. its purely skin deep.

which is crucial when it comes to aaravi too then, because miranda stops when it starts to go too far. she doesnt actually want to hurt aaravi, not in any way that she can't justify as just being a good time. 

miranda does actually care a lot about the people she spends time with and is clearly trying to make them happy, but she's not very good at figuring that out so far or understanding a lot of intricacies of it. im thinking a lot about the bad review lunch event with miranda and liam, but im also thinking about liam's prom king ending, or zoe's totem ending, or the cockfighting event with her and damien. miranda has a lot of the WANT to be good, but doesnt know how to navigate being good or what goodness even means. 

aaravi, in being the kind of bitey person who will ABSOLUTELY push back and bite back and make it very clear when miranda has gone too far, mostly out of how often she has been mistreated, makes it very clear to miranda what's going on and when she's done something wrong. 

something that miranda can actually understand, and realize that she's made a mistake, and because she has this want to BE good, WILL go back on and realize when she's made a mistake. which further helps in letting aaravi enforce her boundaries in a way thats actually pretty safe, and shows that people ARE willing to work with her and respect her boundaries and what she needs and wants. if the monster stops and tries to help you after it hurt you, you pretty quickly figure out it was an accident, and it wasnt what they were wanting to do. it also means they're willing to listen to you and work with you, not against you.

which generally leads into friendship. 

theyve actually got quite a bit in common from there - you cant convince me that miranda entirely doesnt know how to defend herself (and, for all my problems with it, the bellanda ending does show that miranda knows how to handle herself in combat), even if she might not WANT to do it or think a lot about it, she can still hold her own. 

miranda herself is curious and wants to learn about the land and her friends and experiences outside of her own, and she WILL try things just because the people she cares about are interested in them. hell, she really just likes being included, and so even if she cant cook or doesnt play games, she will still sit beside aaravi and watch her do these things, and she WILL be excited and giddy over even the small things she does. they might not be a lot to ravi, but miranda sure can't do them, and its a lot of smaller acknowledgments and praise that really help. 

its the sense that miranda does look up to her and even trusts her (something that miranda can be too prone to doing - she was deprived of affection too, but she's gone the opposite route from aaravi, now desperate to receive it from anyone she can, which combines badly from lack of experience. not to say bad things havent happened to miranda or that all of her trust isnt hard to earn, she's still from a very backstabbing culture of royals, but people contain multitudes. she can know what to look for in one situation and not know in another, or simply ignore it when she feels compelled to) - and certainly aaravi knows how to get miranda to stop when she needs her to. 

they start seeing pieces of themselves in each other, and letting themselves open up little by little, showing more of themselves to each other and simply trusting the other not to hurt them.

that's why the denial is so bad when anyone else asks about it. 

because neither of them exactly WANT to admit to their weaknesses and moments of weakness, even if it is purposefully showing them to each other and no one else. that act of intimacy feels like a lot and even too much, and directly confronting it is difficult. 

its easier when you feel comfortable, when youre with someone who you feel safe with, and able to handle it at your own pace - but other people pointing it out isnt any of that. 

both of them are very aware of how little words can mean and find more reward in actions, which is why both of them deal with the words of what they are and what they feel last. its almost unnecessary between them, but with other people their walls go back up again and they feel the need to deflect and play it down, even when its OBVIOUS what's actually going on. 

its only after they outright start talking about the other as their girlfriend that that urge really starts to go away, because at that point it doesnt feel like vulnerability anyone, it just feels like who they are and where they feel the best.

[rxttenfish]

i think my ideal for miravi, is they unintentionally go from strangers to annoyances to acquaintances to friends to lovers, and if you ask either of them when theyre on the verge of going into the next step, they will VEHEMENTLY deny it.

namely, i think they have to start out poking and prodding and annoying each other. like, theyre both PROUD. theyre both stubborn, and they are superficially very different from each other with different aesthetics. miranda mostly has issues with already assuming she's superior to people (and especially people she doesn't know yet) and will unintentionally show it a lot, and being underestimated and put down is the kinda shit that REALLY gets on aaravi's nerves. they also generally like challenges. aaravi's fairly obvious, and miranda likes to feel like a conquering party. she comes from a militaristic kingdom, she likes forcibly exerting her will and superiority, she likes KNOWING how to destroy someone and ruthlessly executing it.

however, at this early stage of just knowing each other, they havent really sunk under each other's skin yet. miranda in particular- she doesn't like feeling like her hand is being forced. she's all about power and control and, namely, she doesnt actually go all out when she's actually upset by something? i've noticed this a lot, but while miranda has all the power and position of vera and possibly even more, when she's actually angry or hurt, she tends to... close off. pout, i guess. she only ever gets elaborate and extensive in her cruelty when she feels confident about it, and tends to close off otherwise. to her, this is more about fun. she's not really feeling anything more complicated than a cat wanting to push a glass of water off the table. this annoyance and this pride sits more in the realm of dramatics and being able to make a show of it without actually risking her pride, and having aaravi push back just makes it more enticing for her to try and figure her out. its purely skin deep.

which is crucial when it comes to aaravi too then, because miranda stops when it starts to go too far. she doesnt actually want to hurt aaravi, not in any way that she can't justify as just being a good time. miranda does actually care a lot about the people she spends time with and is clearly trying to make them happy, but she's not very good at figuring that out so far or understanding a lot of intricacies of it. im thinking a lot about the bad review lunch event with miranda and liam, but im also thinking about liam's prom king ending, or zoe's totem ending, or the cockfighting event with her and damien. miranda has a lot of the WANT to be good, but doesnt know how to navigate being good or what goodness even means. aaravi, in being the kind of bitey person who will ABSOLUTELY push back and bite back and make it very clear when miranda has gone too far, mostly out of how often she has been mistreated, makes it very clear to miranda what's going on and when she's done something wrong. something that miranda can actually understand, and realize that she's made a mistake, and because she has this want to BE good, WILL go back on and realize when she's made a mistake. which further helps in letting aaravi enforce her boundaries in a way thats actually pretty safe, and shows that people ARE willing to work with her and respect her boundaries and what she needs and wants. if the monster stops and tries to help you after it hurt you, you pretty quickly figure out it was an accident, and it wasnt what they were wanting to do. it also means they're willing to listen to you and work with you, not against you.

which generally leads into friendship. theyve actually got quite a bit in common from there - you cant convince me that miranda entirely doesnt know how to defend herself (and, for all my problems with it, the bellanda ending does show that miranda knows how to handle herself in combat), even if she might not WANT to do it or think a lot about it, she can still hold her own. miranda herself is curious and wants to learn about the land and her friends and experiences outside of her own, and she WILL try things just because the people she cares about are interested in them. hell, she really just likes being included, and so even if she cant cook or doesnt play games, she will still sit beside aaravi and watch her do these things, and she WILL be excited and giddy over even the small things she does. they might not be a lot to ravi, but miranda sure can't do them, and its a lot of smaller acknowledgments and praise that really help. its the sense that miranda does look up to her and even trusts her (something that miranda can be too prone to doing - she was deprived of affection too, but she's gone the opposite route from aaravi, now desperate to receive it from anyone she can, which combines badly from lack of experience. not to say bad things havent happened to miranda or that all of her trust isnt hard to earn, she's still from a very backstabbing culture of royals, but people contain multitudes. she can know what to look for in one situation and not know in another, or simply ignore it when she feels compelled to) - and certainly aaravi knows how to get miranda to stop when she needs her to. they start seeing pieces of themselves in each other, and letting themselves open up little by little, showing more of themselves to each other and simply trusting the other not to hurt them.

that's why the denial is so bad when anyone else asks about it. because neither of them exactly WANT to admit to their weaknesses and moments of weakness, even if it is purposefully showing them to each other and no one else. that act of intimacy feels like a lot and even too much, and directly confronting it is difficult. its easier when you feel comfortable, when youre with someone who you feel safe with, and able to handle it at your own pace - but other people pointing it out isnt any of that. both of them are very aware of how little words can mean and find more reward in actions, which is why both of them deal with the words of what they are and what they feel last. its almost unnecessary between them, but with other people their walls go back up again and they feel the need to deflect and play it down, even when its OBVIOUS what's actually going on. its only after they outright start talking about the other as their girlfriend that that urge really starts to go away, because at that point it doesnt feel like vulnerability anyone, it just feels like who they are and where they feel the best.