#i pulled this off in 1.5 day after coming home from the family festivities like from build to posing (tWICE; i lit got a hand cramp from

[lre333]

i couldn’t resist taking new photos and going back through my Kwanzaa posts to add in an extra crop of the image (same pose, lighting, etc) that just focuses on what’s inside the lil stage set , cuz the full crop is necessary for my intentions re signifying lighting a candle on the kinara (the golden bird on top of the canopy is stand-in for flame; LCNBC production ain’t got the insurance to be putting cast members underneath fabric topped with actual real fire loool) but i feel like i wanted the models and the scenery to stand out a lil bit more than they did

lalalala~ i can’t hear you, perfectionist tendencies lmaooo~

so, i’ll leave a link to the start here so you can go look without hunting, if you like 💚❤️🖤✨

[cno-inbminor]

adsentio - the masque

a/n: it’s royalty!au once again! i would recommend reading adsentio AND bonus letters for the full context. thank you to those who were waiting patiently! did i rewatch ‘ever after: a cinderella story’ for inspiration? of course. 

genre: royalty!au ft. fem!reader, angst, fluff; warnings: terribly written sword fight, somewhat unedited.

summary: You’re starting to wonder if an impostor wrote those letters instead of Prince Akaashi, but the show must go on. 

wc: ~7.4k

royalty!au: adsentio (pt. 1) | bonus letters (pt 1.5) | the masque (pt. 2)

“Are you sure everything is packed?”

“Yes, mother,” you reply, voice laced with exasperation.

“Is your dress for the ceremony there as well? We absolutely cannot leave without that gown!”

“Yes, mother, it’s in there,” you reassure, pointing to a trunk that’s already in the carriage. An audible sigh of relief leaves your mother’s lips. Even though your mother’s fretting was starting to grate at your last nerves, you still felt the excitement of going back to the Fukurodani Kingdom.

After all, Prince Akaashi is waiting for you.

Akaashi’s Christmas gift had come a month and a half before the holiday it was intended for. Soon after, the two of you agreed to refrain from sending any letters during the months of frost, wanting to lessen the burden on the delivery man. He needed to be home with his family when possible, and the journey could be treacherous during those times. As warmer weather rolled around in mid-March, his familiar face had arrived at your castle steps with a small bundle of letters tied with parcel string. They were all addressed to you in a handwriting that you had grown extremely fond of.

If it were up to you, you would be adorned in your most comfortable riding attire and charge full speed ahead. You would probably be able to cut the journey time by about a third, and though it wasn’t much, it would still mean that you would see Akaashi sooner. With how forward he was in his letters, you could only bubble with enthusiasm at how different this summer could be.

Nevertheless, time passes as it does, and you’re once again at the entrance of Fukurodani’s castle. As always, the king and queen stand side by side at the bottom of the steps, the prince standing politely by them. It seems that Prince Akaashi has only grown more handsome since last summer. If you had to guess, he would be more than a full head taller than you. Besides height, Akaashi’s face seems to have lost any remaining baby fat, leaving nothing but a pointed chin and a sharp jawline. Whether or not it be a result of your newfound attraction towards him, there’s no room to deny just how handsome he truly is, bordering on ethereal beauty.

His piercing blue orbs seem to sparkle in delight when you step out of the carriage. In fact, he’s quick to take place of their usual footman and hold out a hand for you to grasp, securely ensuring that you don’t lose your step. Your grip is tight, and you can only hope that he sees the joy reflected in your own eyes. With intention and purpose, he presses his lips to the back of your hand, needing no reminder from his mother this time, and never removes his gaze from yours. Your breath seems to have escaped your lungs, even more so when he straightens and takes one daring step closer to you. Both of your parents must be brimming with satisfaction at this interaction, but all of it is ignored and disregarded. Akaashi still keeps your hand in his as he slightly leans down to whisper in your ear.

“You look beautiful as always, Princess (y/n).”

Your title had always moderately annoyed you over the last 18 years, but you decide then and there that there would be no complaint if he addressed you as so for the rest of eternity. Furthermore, if it weren’t for your dignity and pride, you would kiss him right now in front of everyone. As he pulls away, you do your best to compose yourself. After all, two can play this game.

“Thank you, Your Highness. You’ve grown more handsome since I last saw you.”

“Have we returned to formalities again?”

“Please forgive my old habits, Prince Akaashi.”

“(Y/n),” he murmurs darkly, metallic blue eyes full of warning and mischief. “Need I remind you of my given name?”

You register the tightening of his grip. Don’t even dare, his eyes seem to caution, not when so much progress was made through paper and ink. But you know he will rise to a challenge for his desires when he sees one – it’s only in his nature.

“Perhaps I need a reason to address you as such,” you quip, watching his eyes flash with an emotion you are unable to pinpoint. Nevertheless, you remove your hand from his, ignoring the yearning for the warmth that he had provided. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must greet the king and queen or they’ll have my head.”

Akaashi only watches with longing as you trek away to curtsy before his parents. Could your birthday celebration come any sooner?

-

You’re beginning to think that someone other than Prince Akaashi wrote those letters to you, that someone else had just forged his handwriting to a tee and perfectly replicated his writing style. Since the little interaction between you two on the day of your arrival, Akaashi was acting as if this were any other summer. Very little was said to or done with you – even last summer, the two of you had often strolled through the gardens while discussing various topics. Yet now, it was five summers ago all over again: the two of you at opposite ends of the castle reading your desired books.

You only ever saw him during mealtimes or in passing – even then, he would simply nod in your direction or only speak to you when he had to. Your efforts to narrow the gap diminished significantly by the third day, and by the end of the first week, you decided to completely give up. The prince has constructed a wall between you two and you possessed no ability to strike it down.

On days you weren’t reading, out of boredom and the need to fill your mind with thoughts of anything other than Akaashi, you would help prepare for the ball and your coming-of-age celebration. A private, proper ceremony would be done in your own kingdom once you returned, but it had long been determined that the festivities would be held here. Invitations and RSVP’s had steadily increased over the months, indicating that this would be a grand occasion. All the lessons on design and party-arrangement were finally paying off in its fullest, but your mother could not ignore the lack of life in your eyes.

It’s two weeks before the ball – you’re currently sitting in your chambers, lounging in a chair on your balcony with a book in your lap. You’ve recently taken an interest in philosophy, first starting with the works of Aristotle and Plato. A faint rap of knuckles on your door breaks your focus. “Come in,” you call out loud enough for your visitor to hear. The door clicks open and shut, and you’re mildly surprised to see your mother turning the corner to search for you.

“Mother, what a surprise,” you express while standing. She pulls you in for a hug without a word, only confusing you in the process as you return the embrace. After removing herself, she guides you back inside until the two of you are sitting on the edge of your bed, still holding your hands.

“Something has been bothering you, my child. Is there something you wish to tell me?” Your mother doesn’t want to push – she knows of the letters, your developed affection for Akaashi, and the lack of interaction between the two of you this summer. It’s hard to miss the lack of your figure by his side when he’s wondering around the castle, the ever pensive, calculating look on his face never fading. It’s hard to miss the way you often pick at your food, even going as far to request smaller portions for all your meals.

But it’s even harder to ignore the worried look in the prince’s eyes that’s cast your way when you excuse yourself after every meal, leaving earlier than everyone else.

You can only sigh before your teeth begin to gently gnaw on your bottom lip. “Mother, how angry would you be if this engagement doesn’t proceed as you’ve planned?”

“To be quite honest,” she begins as a small smile forms on her face. “I wouldn’t be angry at all. Not if the cost of it was your happiness.”

“But what about the merger?”

“With all these years between our kingdoms, engagement or not, a merger of sorts would only be inevitable. We only hoped that naturally, you and the prince would be drawn towards each other. But to force the two of you together would be unfair – your father and mine, as well as his parents, main concern is the happiness of our children.”

“Do you really mean that?”

“Of course,” your mother emphasizes, a hand reaching up to cradle your cheek. “In fact, if you would like…

“We don’t have to come here next summer.”

Your eyes widen. Your mother was giving you a choice in this?

“Are you...sure?”

“I’m absolutely positive, (y/n). I will not force you and neither will your father, especially if forcing you would only make your pain greater.”

“Very well then, mother. We shall see.”

“Keep your chin up, my dear. We must keep you in your best shape for the ball, and…” she pauses, her smile turning somewhat mischievous. “Perhaps remind the prince that he should be properly courting you by now.”

“Mother!”

-

“Is it proper for a princess to be sparring?”

“Bokuto, you’ve known me for so many years, yet you still ask me this question every time. Do you really think my father would allow me to marry without knowing how to defend myself?”  

“I can’t really say, Princess. At least, not without possibly offending the king.”

Every summer, you make it tradition to leave time for sparring. When you turned fourteen, many of the younger guards in training had been terrified of practicing with you, fearing that they’d be punished for engaging in behavior that could possibly harm the princess. But after much coaxing and convincing (as well as written promise from King Akaashi), they finally felt comfortable in sparring with you. Back at home, you had a few designated training partners from the royal guard, but it would do no good if you didn’t keep up with your skills.

You’ve won your fair share, as well as lost a few handfuls. But you were never a sore loser and only thanked your partner for their time, even asking for pointers. On a few occasions, you would duel with Akaashi, though for times when you were at an advantage, you would purposely lose. The prince needed faith and trust from his men, and many would be dimwitted enough to let a few losses to a woman diminish their view of him. Akaashi was very well aware of your generosity, as well as Bokuto, which only caused him to tease the prince relentlessly in private.

For the sixth time this summer, just one week before the masque, you had pleaded with Bokuto for his time. At this point, you prefer to not ask for anything from Akaashi, especially when you’re so obviously kept at arm’s length. Bokuto is much more agreeable and doesn’t treat you like a glass figurine, thanks to the many years of roughhousing during your childhoods. He isn’t afraid to use his full force behind the strikes of his sword and you could always guarantee a few good rounds from him. Additionally, he always offers a lot of good advice after each duel. When you incorporate his teachings into your skill set, he recognizes it immediately and howls with pride, praising himself for being such a wonderful instructor.

“Why haven’t you asked Akaashi to spar with you yet?” Bokuto asks while tightening his gloves. The training grounds are empty at this time, though to be fair, it’s still quite early in the morning. You wanted to spar comfortably without the overbearing heat of the summer afternoon sun. A sigh leaves your lips – it’s not as if he doesn’t know already.

“I believe you’re well aware of why I haven’t, Bokuto. He’s barely spoken to me in these weeks. In fact, I’m sure he has better things to do than to indulge me.”

“He still cares for you.”

“Well, he has a funny way of showing it,” you reply bitterly and draw out your sword. “Come on, no time to dawdle.”

Disobeying your words, Bokuto bides his time with some extra stretching. “I’m his closest friend, I would know.”

“Then he can tell me himself. Can we please start?”

“Very well then.”

His words have riled you up significantly, Bokuto notices. Your attacks are relentless and your senses seem sharper than ever, easily dodging and parrying with the footwork of an experienced soldier. In fact, your movement is breathtakingly graceful, almost as if you were dancing. The duel goes on for minutes until Bokuto accidentally hesitates and can only surrender when the tip of your sword is millimeters from his neck. He drops his sword and a big grin forms on his face.

You lower your weapon and step back as the both of you catch your breath. Behind you, Bokuto spots a familiar figure leaning over the edge of their balcony. They’re too far away to hear what you’re saying or what expressions you’re wearing, but that doesn’t stop Bokuto from coming up with a devious plan.

“(Y/n), don’t look behind you, but he’s watching.”

You freeze – you completely forgot that Akaashi’s room faces the direction of the training grounds. Naturally, he has his own balcony, but you didn’t think he’d be watching. Had he been observing all your other sparring rounds? And how was he awake now? He’s usually never up this early.

“I have an idea,” Bokuto continues. “But you have to play along, all right?”

“I’m not liking the sound of this…”

“You just need to follow my lead. Now, pretend you’re about to start another duel.”

With all the confusion displayed on your face, you warily adjust yourself into your preparatory stance. Bokuto steps closer to you while sheathing his sword, eyeing your position with his hands behind his back. He quickly checks to see if Akaashi is still paying attention, and after confirming so, he enters your bubble of personal space.

“If you begin to feel uncomfortable, tell me. If I’m right, it’ll only take a few minutes before he’s down here.”

“But I don’t want—”

“Shh,” Bokuto interrupts with a gloved finger on your lips. He smirks when he spots Akaashi suddenly straightening himself, his posture turning stiff and guarded. You watch as he reaches for the hand holding your sword, wrapping his own around your grip.

“What are you doing?” You hiss at him.

“Wait a few seconds…okay,” Bokuto removes himself from your personal space. You relax and put down your guard, resisting the urge to punch him in the arm.

“What ever was all that for?!”

“Look,” he replies, pointing in the direction of Akaashi’s balcony. “He’s gone. I guarantee he’ll be here in the next five minutes.”

“Bokuto—”

“Now, now, let’s have another round to pass the time.”

“But—”

You’re interrupted when Bokuto swings his sword towards you, your own blocking his instinctively. You could try to protest all you want, but he wasn’t going to let you have it. You would make sure that he regrets it. Much like the first round, you put your all into the sparring session, fury growing as Bokuto’s grin widens over time. He’s taunting you over and over, leaving you so focused that you’re completely oblivious to the third figure currently making their way towards the two of you. Once within earshot, Akaashi clears his throat and you whip towards him with horror in your eyes.

“Ah, Akaashi, excellent! So glad you could join us!” Bokuto yells, walking away from you to clap him on the shoulder. “In fact, would you mind taking over from here? I just remembered I needed to attend to something back inside the castle. Thank you, Akaashi!” And then Bokuto just…leaves.

A shroud of silence covers the two of you – your attention is directed at anything but the object of your affections, choosing to focus on the dew of the grass, the glint of the light on your sword, the light morning breeze blowing past your stray hairs, the loose threads at the waist of your pants—

“Shall we begin?” He asks, breaking the tranquility.

Akaashi is infuriating; infuriatingly handsome, infuriatingly good at stripping down your defenses, infuriatingly adept at raising your heartbeat to an alarming rate. It’s simply unfair, and it angers you.

You say nothing while taking a few steps backward, your feet adjusting yourself in the same position that Bokuto had you stand in just mere minutes ago. Akaashi observes and also readies himself, his stance very similar to yours. Only seconds pass before he’s charging towards you, and the fight begins.

The first round falls in his favor, his face showing little reaction throughout the whole clash. You demand another round, barely giving time for a break because you’re brimming with the need to have some semblance of a victory. Weeks of pent up furious confusion make themselves known in the way you fight – you no longer move with the grace seen earlier with Bokuto. Instead, traces of sloppiness are there in your footwork and Akaashi takes advantage of this, though he begins to worry. If this were a real duel, you would’ve long fallen victim to his sword.

The second round lasts much longer than the first due to your obstinate refusal to back down and give up. Your braid had long come undone and Akaashi can’t help but think about how beautiful you look, even with your hair seemingly flying wildly every time you spin to try to catch him off guard. His split focus costs him when your weapons meet in the middle, allowing you to push and twist his hand around to force him to lose his grip. The metal is flung towards the side and he’s met with the shimmer of your sword that’s dangerously close to his jugular vein. He slowly brings his hands up in surrender and you falter.

Both of your chests rapidly rise and fall, lungs desperate for oxygen. Akaashi struggles to remember the last time you had put so much effort into a duel, your desperation to win screaming itself into the air. He notices how much thinner your face has gotten, how your arm slightly trembles with exhaustion. You need to rest and eat more, Akaashi concludes with furrowed eyebrows. Your well-being is of utmost importance to him.

You feel yourself begin to quiver under Akaashi’s stare, yet long to know what could be going through his mind. Even though you’ve won this round, Akaashi still has your heart and the thought somewhat embarrasses you. You’ve always prided yourself in being level-headed, yet you just spent the last thirty to forty-five minutes taking out all your frustrations on him.

“Have you been getting enough sleep, (y/n)?”

Don’t say my name like that.

“I don’t see why it matters,” you sigh, moving away to pick up his fallen sword.

“You need to look after yourself,” Akaashi replies, following after her with a slight sense of urgency. You whip around too fast for him to react, only groaning from the impact when you practically shove his weapon to his chest. Nothing prepared you for this conversation – you aren’t ready to have it, and you’d rather not have it with swords nearby.

“I am looking after myself, your highness,” you bite through gritted teeth. Your feet carry you as fast as possible towards the entrance back into the castle, but a hand latches onto your wrist and demands your attention. You have no choice but to turn your body towards him, denying that his eyes are flashing nothing but concern and frustration.

“You’re eating less. You’re always awake at odd hours. Your corsets are too tight – they look as if they’ll squeeze the life out of you. You keep pushing yourself too hard during sparring sessions. It takes you longer than usual to finish books. You’re under the sun too much—”

“You have no right!” you accuse, attempting to wriggle your wrist from his grip. Why does he speak as if he’s been keeping a watchful eye on you when he can barely meet your own over the dinner table?

Akaashi refuses to relent, even pulling you closer to him under the shadows of the doorway. “Please (y/n), you must know how much I worry—”

“Then pray tell, why have you ignored me since I stepped foot into your castle?!” You cry out, tears of vexation beginning to form. “Why have you ignored my very existence, as if we are twelve again and trying to escape something seemingly inevitable?! How could—how could you build me up for months and months, only to tear me down without a second thought?”

Akaashi knows his reasoning is botched and full of fallacies – he’s beginning to understand the extent of how much his actions have affected you, but he can’t help but try to save some face. His cool, collected façade and wisdom had long taken a backseat towards matters concerning you, and he feels like a fool. A big, bumbling, inexplicably irrational fool in love.  

“Princess—”

“I would have no qualms if you had just outright told me that you didn’t care for me,” you interrupt once more, though in a calmer tone. Your body is still shaking from the emotional downpour, tears streaking down your cheeks unattractively. You wish you could just take a horse from the stables and ride home, away from all this nonsense. “But you can’t write me those letters, the very ones that I’ve so deeply cherished this passing year, and treat me as if it were all some dream that my brain so desperately sprung together.”

“I have my deepest regrets – I’m so sorry, it’s just…with the way we greeted each other on the first day, I somehow convinced myself that you didn’t mean what you wrote—”

“Keiji,” you interrupt softly. How he wishes you were saying his name in a different context, in a tone that was full of love than disappointment. How he wishes there were no salty tears tracking down your cheeks. “You have known me for almost thirteen years. Thirteen long, playful, revealing years. Nothing ever escapes you, and you said so yourself; we are old friends. Therefore,” you pause, gulping.

“Shouldn’t you know that I would never pen those words to just anyone?”

And you disappear into the castle.

Akaashi feels that there’s nothing more appropriate than beating his head into the wall, cursing himself for being so stupid.

What have I done?

-

“I must say, in the most appropriate sense, you are truly, royally fucked.”

“I know, Bokuto. I know.”      

-

Akaashi tries to make up for his mistakes in his classic fashion: silently, with small thoughtful gifts.

He has resumed leaving flowers from the garden in your chambers again: some days, you return to a peony. Other days, you return to the addition a single rose in the ardent shade of passionate love. They accumulate on your dresser, your room becoming filled with the floral scents. The lingering fragrance haunts your dreams, filled with flashes of childhood memories and anticipated encounters at the masque. You often wake up feeling as if there’s a lead weight on your chest, and even though you physically slept for eight hours, the fatigue in your eyes vehemently argue otherwise.

Akaashi becomes insistent on escorting you everywhere, always offering his arm for you to take. At first, you’re hesitant, but just a day later, it becomes second nature. Akaashi joins you again when reading – if he can, he’ll take a seat next to you. If not, he’ll be sure to be across from you, though he’s not reading most of these times. He often carries a journal with him, assistants always prepared to provide him with a writing utensil and ink, and scribbles away. Akaashi has never held back his admiration for the world’s literature, and four days before your birthday, you pause in your reading to feed the curiosity.

“What are you scribbling in there, if I may ask?”

“A…personal work of sorts.”

“Your Highness, an author? I must say, it suits you. Is it a work of fiction?”

“Not this time,” he says with the ghost of a demure, secretive smile on his face. “You could consider it a memoir.”  

“If you say so.”

-

It had been decided some time ago that the ball would be held the night before your birthday, rather than the day of. These events were known to last well into the night, so at midnight, they would make an announcement in your honor and present you before everyone invited. With these change in plans, your original deadline for Akaashi to find you had to be moved ahead, and he was less than pleased to hear this the day before the ball, even though it was anticipated.

“Fifteen minutes is precious time, Princess,” Akaashi expresses with displeasure. “Could you permit me at least five ‘til midnight?”

“I’m afraid that won’t be possible, milord. I must have enough time to prepare myself.”

“Have I only been upgraded to being called ‘milord’?”

“How is it that your title irks you so?”

“Only when it’s coming from you, Princess. And I must say, you’re one to speak – don’t think I’m unaware of how much you greatly dislike it when you’re addressed as such. You’ve never bothered to correct me though. Why is that?”

“Perhaps…” you say, giving him a side glance full of mirth. “Perhaps you’re just an exception.”

Akaashi’s eyes widen a bit before crinkling with delight. You never cease to amaze him, reminding him at the most unexpected times that you are also invested in this growing relationship with him. He quickly looks around him before gently dragging you to the nearest empty bedroom, hoping that even though the walls have ears, they don’t have the eyes to witness this. Once the door is quietly shut behind him, Akaashi begins to take slow steps in your direction, towering over you and crowding you until your heels hit the wall. You struggle to maintain eye contact as well as keeping your breathing under control. Akaashi continues to pin you down with his piercing gaze, gradually bending down until he’s at eye level with you. Thoughts run amok in your brain as his face nears yours. Is he going to—

Your internal process ceases when he tenderly places a kiss at the corner of your lips, then moving until his breath is right by your ear. The sensation triggers a shiver down your spine, causing him to chuckle.

“To give you an idea of what I’d like my reward to be when I catch you tomorrow night, Princess,” he murmurs before moving away.

You’re blushing furiously no matter how much you fight it, barely registering when he lifts both of your hands to place a similarly gentle kiss on your touching knuckles. Part of you wants to protest when he steps towards the door and cracks it open, peeking out to see if anyone is lingering in the corridors. Akaashi keeps a hold on one of your hands, quickly leading you out and folding it into the crook of his other elbow. He fixes his gaze in front of him to bring on an air of normalcy, as if he didn’t just sneak you into a spare bedroom to do something that many would somewhat frown upon. Akaashi had yet to ask to formally court you, but he has full intentions to change that tomorrow night.

“Perhaps you’ll give me an insight on what you’ll be wearing tomorrow night?” He inquires cheekily and you send him your dirtiest glare.

“Only in your dreams, milord. Did you not read the part about making this harder on you so I could have some fun?”

“Wouldn’t it be better to have fun with each other?”

“Do you mean to tempt me?” You tease, chuckling into the back of your free hand.

“There was no guarantee that you’d refuse – am I not allowed to grasp onto any remaining hope?”

“Whatever satisfies you, milord.”

“Then let me find you tomorrow night. I don’t believe I’ll stand for any of the other suitors attempting to whisk you away with baseless words and ill intentions.”

“What would you know of their intentions?” You ask curiously, looking up towards him. His eyes darken and harden with an emotion you’re not familiar with. It’s one that is never directed towards you, almost dangerous in a way.

“More than you should know, Princess,” he replies gravely.

Before you realize it, you’re sitting in front of your vanity, sitting as prettily and patiently as you can while your handmaiden, Yachi, does her best work on your hair. You observe your current features – a faint blush had been dusted on your cheeks and a deep rouge painted on your lips. Your mask would be similar to many those of the other attendees, one more thing to pull in your favor in this game of cat and mouse.

Your heart begins to beat faster as the seconds tick by – there’s no doubt that Akaashi is already by his parents’ side, carrying a princely aura and politely greeting all the guests. The ball began at 9PM and it was already thirty minutes after. You can hear the faint sounds of the musicians playing up a lively theme, imagining that the festivities will be in full swing soon. Soon, your handmaiden is patting you on the shoulder, notifying you that she was done. In the mirror, you turn your head left and right and nod appreciatively, thanking her for her hard work. Your fingers shakily pick up your mask and Yachi ties it securely behind your head and underneath your hair.

“Do you think he’ll recognize me?” You ask nervously, fiddling your fingers in your lap. Yachi knew almost everything about the ordeal and had even come up with some good ideas to make things harder on the prince.

“If he keeps in mind that you’ll be the most beautiful maiden at the ball, then I’m sure he will,” Yachi giggles, tucking in some stray hairs.

“You’re not here to lie to me,” you whine, pouting slightly. “In all seriousness…”

“I have no doubt, milady,” Yachi says, her eyes and tone softening. “If His Highness likes you as much as he says he does, then he will certainly find you.”

You let out a deep breath before standing from your chair, the nerves beginning to course through your system. In the reflection, you gaze upon the line of flower-filled vases on your dresser, their presence somehow bringing you some serenity. Yachi is right -- with how much he boasted in letters about studying every memory he has of you, there should be a reasonable level of certainty that he would catch you by your deadline.

But now was the time to be festive. After all, the guests were here in your honor (and to have a joyous time) and you’d be rude to not partake in the activities. Some of the maids are bustling around, ensuring that drinks and food are readily available, never running low. The sound of your heels clicking along the granite echoes against the walls, yet your heartbeat seems louder and louder as you near the ballroom. The castle beholds two specific large ballrooms with double doors towards the courtyard, allowing the cool summer air in. You take a quick detour and choose to enter the ballroom from the outside, much less likely to arouse suspicion.

At least everyone seems to be enjoying themselves, you think to yourself with a smile. It’s easy to spot Bokuto in the crowd with that hair of his, just as you predicted. The band just finishes a song when you sneak in, yet starts up a familiar tune not long after. The piece calls for a large group to dance together, and wanting to join in, you make your way to the center. Luckily, one more female was needed and you are welcomed, as well as gently shoved to a tall man who seemed to be lacking a partner. It’s not hard to guess who it is, however. Even with a mask, you could recognize that crooked grin from anywhere.

As per tradition, he bows to you and you curtsy, then routinely placing your hand in his. He draws you close to him by the waist, but his grip is light and barely holds any weight on your back. Taking a quick once-over at the group, he addresses you.

“Should I be counting my lucky stars to be dancing with the princess in honor?” He teases just loud enough for you to hear. 

“I would advise against it, Prince Kuroo.”

A quiet laugh leaves his chest as he gives you a spin, flawlessly bring you back to him. “You can trust me, Princess. Bokuto has already informed me of the game in place, though I suppose it was more of a warning more than anything.”

“Oh, how so?”

“If I didn’t want to face the wrath of your dear prince, I should refrain from attempting to convince you that a merger between our kingdoms would be more ideal.”

“I must say, I’m a little surprised that Bokuto isn’t trying to stir up trouble.”

“I would advise against speaking too soon – he’s already on his third glass of mead.”

“Good gods,” you mutter in disbelief. Kuroo shakes with laughter.

“For my amusement, I’d like to see Akaashi be a clumsy fool in love. You have my word that I’ll keep this interaction secret for now,” he promises, rushing his words a little bit. Soon, the two of you will need to break apart and switch partners.

“But don’t forget to have a little fun. Happy birthday, Princess,” Kuroo says sincerely in your ear, sneaking in a quick kiss to the back of your hand before letting you go. You fall into the hands of another male, one you don’t recognize, and fall into silent routine until the dance is over. When the band comes to a stop, everybody bows to each other with a wide smile on their faces and cheeks tinted red from happiness. Momentarily, you had forgotten about your nerves and Akaashi, but now that there was nothing else to focus on, the shivers of being chased creep along your body.

In one sense, it’s almost thrilling. The thought has you questioning your own sanity, but perhaps it’s only because Akaashi is the one searching for you, finding the right time to pounce. As a result, you never stay in one place for too long, mingling into other crowds and making small talk. Very few have noticed who you were, and even Bokuto replaces his antics for a wink when he passes by you, knowing his usual behavior would give it all away.

The clock strikes eleven, each toll causing your heart to skip a beat. You grant yourself one more glance towards Akaashi.

Earlier during the dance, you had spotted him in the far corner of the ballroom staring in another direction. Now when you have the time to watch and appreciate, you can’t help but marvel at how beautiful this man is. Time boded well on him, his features and height resembling a strong, trustworthy young prince. He had the intellect and perceptive level worthy of being king, and even the atmosphere around him agreed. His head was fit to hold a crown, and any woman would fall at his feet in seconds. Tonight, he is donned in the kingdom’s colors, his own attire a regal show of ivory, ebony, and gold. The design is not overly ornate or flamboyant, yet regal enough to instantaneously remind others exactly who he is. Each hue makes him shine like a beacon of light in darkness.

Needing some fresh air, you slip out towards the courtyard and quietly make your way to the garden entrance. A couple of guards are standing watch but let you in once you untie the mask from your face. Your feet pad down a familiar path towards the rows of peonies and you’re thankful for the uninhibited rays of the full moon tonight. They’re cast in a soft glow of white and blue – you can’t help but tenderly touch petals of one half-open.

“I had an inkling that you would come here.”

The familiar tenor startles you out of your wits, your hand flying back up to your chest as you turn towards the perpetrator for your premature heart attack. None other than Prince Akaashi stands before you with his hands behind his back and a twinkle in his eyes. Then, the weight is lifted off your chest.

He had found you.

Once you catch your breath, you can only let out a suppressed laugh. There was nowhere to hide, not when your mask is grasped between the fingers of your other hand. He hadn’t even bothered to wear one, though you’ll scold him later for not participating in the festivities.

“I suppose you followed me here?”

“You could say that,” Akaashi replies with a smile, moving closer to stand right in front of you.

“It did take you over an hour and a half though.”

“(Y/n).”

“…yes, milord?”

“I noticed you the second you stepped into the ballroom.”

The statement baffles you and freezes you to the core. You find yourself unable to do anything when Akaashi grasps both of your hands in his, bringing them to his lips much like he did yesterday.

“Then why did you not come to me then?” You question after finding your voice again. Akaashi says nothing at first, only rearranging your limbs to a familiar posture for a waltz. He begins to step and lead, your own feet naturally following him as if you’ve been practicing this for a long time together. His silence makes you grow more unsure of all this.

“I wanted to observe, reconfirm my suspicions that I was already fully convinced on. In addition, I wanted you to enjoy yourself. You and our mothers have spent so many months preparing this – it’s only right that you enjoy the fruits of your labor.”

“Then you saw me dance?”

“Yes, and you were the best of them all,” he instantly compliments, always honest and straightforward to the point, sending blood to your cheeks.

“Thank you, milord,” you reply sheepishly.

“You’re welcome, Princess. Though I must say,” Akaashi’s tone turns dangerous, leaning over to whisper in your ear. He notices how your hands tighten their grips on his, perhaps trying to ground yourself. “Why did Prince Kuroo of Nekoma speak to you like this, so intimately? I thought, perhaps, this would also be left as a privilege solely for me?”

“He was doing just as you had warned before,” you chuckle, silently apologizing for pulling the wool over Kuroo’s eyes. Judging by the sharp inhale, Akaashi was less than pleased at what you were insinuating. “He may or may not have been attempting to persuade me into forming a more personal alliance with his kingdom.”

“Was he now…” Akaashi murmurs. In an effort to contain the green jealousy rising within him (and gain a little leverage), his hands slowly release yours to gently grasp your waist. For a moment, he wishes they were holding you this way in a different situation, but that doesn’t stop him from daringly ghosting his lips over the column of your neck, his breath sending goosebumps along your skin. You keep as still as possible, completely unsure of what to do. But if there’s one thing that is certain, it’s that no man could ever have an effect on you like Akaashi does.

“I have known you since you were young,” he proceeds. “And though we didn’t want anything to do with each other, we eventually grew accustomed to each other. Before I even realized it, I was watching your every move, listening to every word you said. Even when we were twelve, I found myself wanting to be near you. I wanted you to take notice of me just as I did you. When we were fifteen and you sat against me by the fireplace…there was the most wonderful sense of belonging, as if you were supposed to be right there by my side.”

Your heart might fail you at this point, aching for the man who was now lifting his head away to face you. The back of one hand lifts to caress your cheek, and your eyes catch the ardent passion in his, even in the moonlight.

“I penned those words to you with every intention of properly courting you. I wished for you to understand the lengths I would go to ensure your happiness. It was never about this merger between our kingdoms and hasn’t been for a long time. I only want you to know that should you allow me to, it would be my honor to court you and perhaps…be your husband.”

Unshed tears of joy are brimming in your eyes. Akaashi has suffered enough, you believe. A tear must have escaped because he catches it with his thumb, softly wiping it away. You can’t help but let out a breathless laugh, and Akaashi knows it’s a good sign. The smile on his face grows wider as you collect yourself to give your response.

“You do, after all, deserve a reward for finding me.”

Akaashi smirks and tilts his head forward, his lips millimeters away from yours.

“And what would that be, Princess?” He purrs.

Your heart takes a leap and you press your lips to his. Instantly, Akaashi cradles your face, refusing to separate from you. The first kiss is innocent and unmoving, allowing the both of you to revel in the sensation. A thrilling streak of adrenaline courses through your veins and sets your soul on fire as he puts more force, conveying to you his neediness and years of pent-up desire. You return it ounce for ounce until you can’t breathe anymore, pulling back to breathe in some much-needed oxygen. Akaashi doesn’t stop, sensuously kissing every available surface of your cheeks until he’s tired of waiting to kiss your lips once more. You give in and let yourself fall until the point of no return – even if Akaashi was the devil incarnate, you would gladly hand over your soul for an eternity of his love.

“As much as I want to continue this,” he states over bated breath. “We have a ball to return to.”

You sigh and nod, brushing your nose against his before allowing some distance between the two of you. Akaashi offers to tie the mask before taking hold of your hand, folding it into the crook of his elbow as he has done many times before. The two of you bide your time as much as possible, giving each other knowing glances when the courtyard is within your view again. Some of the ladies (and men) throw you nasty looks for having had private time with the prince, but none of it matters as Akaashi asks for a dance, spending the rest of the minutes until midnight with you in his arms.

After midnight strikes and being presented to the crowd, Akaashi keeps a hold on you again, ignoring the jeering and teasing gestures from Bokuto and Prince Kuroo. Kuroo, the ever honest yet playful man he is, sends you a wink behind Akaashi’s back and you bury your face into his chest. Whatever the cause may be, Akaashi continues to envelop you in his arms with a light and comfortable conversation taking place. As a natural silence passes over, he whispers into your ear, “Happy birthday, Princess.”

“Thank you, Keiji.”

Ecstasy fills his soul -- there hasn’t been anything more gratifying or more satisfying than hearing his name from your lips again. Finally, from now until death...he feels absolutely complete.

[thejosh1980]

Live Alive...

So much to write, so little time...I'll try to keep it short and focused.

Life has changed a lot here in northern New South Wales recently, but first, lets talk about the music...

It's just over 5 weeks since I performed my first live show after a 13 month break. I was a little concerned I couldn't pull off a show in my usual fashion, however I think in the end, every one, including me, was satisfied.

It is true, it's just like riding a bike...

Once I stepped up on stage to do my job, which is to put on the best show I could, I felt comfortable. I really enjoyed the moment, and didn't feel nervous or anxiety.

I met the drummer only minutes before we jumped on stage, it reminded me of the first show with Eddy and the Backfires in mid 2008 in Bottrop. I met Eddy and then bam, on stage to play a show together... We continued to play together for another 5 years. Sometimes I watch the video (on youtube) and smile when I see Eddy's face light up from the get go, much like the singer 5 weeks ago. I was the right guy for the job, I knew what I was doing.

I've gotten used to that though, learning songs off a CD then playing without a band rehearsal, and usually it works well... One doesn't really learn the songs until they're played live anyhow, right? The groove and feeling is always little different once the energy of a live show kicks in.

I try to slip into the band's sound and style... Learning on the spot who to follow and figure out what's going to happen next. Sometimes that means I'm not fully concentrating on the crowd, and maybe even looking a little confused at the band, but it's the lead singer's job to work the crowd, my job is to support them in their work, and I can't do that if I'm trying to impress the girls in the front row instead of listening and watching the band.

There were quite a few restrictions in place in Australia in July, so festival attendee numbers were down. Only Queensland folks and a few New South Wales folks could join. Usually the much larger crowd is a mix from all over Australia. I did meet up with some old friends, and made a few new ones. Reminding me that not only do I love playing music, but I do enjoy the social aspect of being a musician, that is whenever my anxiety levels are manageable. It's also sweet that no matter how long I've been away, folks come and say hi, and we talk like no time has passed.

This show was meant to be the beginning of returning to regular live shows, the band are very interested in having me play with them in the future and gigs were (very) slowly coming in...

However, everything changed the next morning...

With the high of a fun show, I woke to my cousin offering me eggs and bacon for breaky, I said “hells yeah!”... I had decided I wanted to attend the festival that afternoon before driving home that evening, to catch up with more friends and see some of the bands I had only been hearing about while living in Europe.

The 10am news came on “South East Queensland Lockdown Begins at 4pm” ! Well there goes my plans for visiting the festival!! I had to freshen up, eat, pack up and head south and cross the border post haste. I didn't want to be stuck in QLD, or in traffic!

Some folks had tested positive near Brisbane, and the festival was in one of the areas of concern. The festival promoter had to cancel 1.5 days into a 3 day rockabilly weekender.

Once I crossed the border back into NSW I found out I had to isolate at home... Apparently they back dated the restrictions for returning residents.

Lucky us!

So, I had a week at home to isolate. I decided to get tested, it was a negative result. What else do you expect?

The situation at the time, wasn't too bad, but a pain in the butt. I had to isolate for a week or two, and then I'd be free in NSW to hang out.

Luckily our classes went online too... Another challenge to contend with... Online classes are a necessity these days, but it took a few weeks for me to get used to 'em... To settle into the new routine.

Anyhow, so there I am isolating at home... A week later, on Sunday evening, I am released from isolation as the QLD situation is under control and NSW ease their rules. Earlier than expected, winner winner chicken dinner!

But then... The very next day, Monday evening, the whole of NSW is thrown into lockdown because of Sydney's high case numbers and some regional cases coming to light.

It's 5 weeks after the show, and I have been in either home isolation or restrictions or code red type lockdowns (or whatever you want to call it) for 99.9% of the time...

Good times...

I'm not bagging the rules, I know they're there to help. It's OK, it is what it is... I can call friends and family, I can exercise and, I can play the guitar. What more could I ask for? - Probably a lot more, but I digress.

I have learnt to become adaptable... It's not uncommon for me to feel frustrated at change, but eventually I come around to it.

Now back to music...

The NSW lockdown does affect the band too, 2 band members live south of the border in NSW and 2 live north in QLD, which has few restrictions...

Can we even get together to play? Are shows being booked? If we play a show on either side of the border, do we have to self isolate afterwards? It's a bit like living in 2 seperate countries at the moment, each with its own rules.

Leading up to the show, I hadn't done any live streams, I hadn't worked on music production or songwriting, however I was looking forward to the show. I wasn't really thinking too much about about the future... I've been concentrating a lot on my studies (which is another blog for another day)...

A week after the show I was a little put off by the isolation and restrictions, however now I am starting to take small steps to get back into playing for myself. What I mean is, I have worked on some song production, song marketing, song writing and even looking into working with musicians to put my own band together!!

How cool is that? To me, that is very cool...

Now the small steps mean I have also been co-writing with a friend, starting to put more of my music online (like Bandcamp... coming soon!) and thinking how I can start over again... Cause that's what this is really about...

While I do have a band who hires me to play their music (which I enjoy and am grateful for, whenever we'll actually be able to play together) I really need to start on my own music career. That is a big step! So time to break it down into smaller steps...

When I first moved back home, I had a few offers to jam with old friends, and didn't take them up on it. I didn't feel like playing. Maybe it was a bit of depression, or something, but I just wasn't excited about it...There had been a lot happening in 2020, on top of leaving Europe and integrating back into Australian life, well, I guess it was a bit too much for me at the time.

In the past few weeks I've started contacting folks to get together, once the restrictions have eased, and I am really looking forward to swappin' riffs, ideas and jammin' with friends old and new!

It was a small thing, to say yes to that show in July... Really, it was just a word “yes”... but that decision has lit a fire... the spark is burning... and I don't quite know where it's going to take me, but even the pandemic blues hasn't gotten me down this month like it has done in the past...

Cause now I got something to work towards...

I wanna work with musicians, in person or online... I wanna write songs again... I wanna play a live show with others, their music or mine... I wanna release my solo album (eventually) and I wanna express myself as I once did with the 6 string in the past...

Are you comin' along for the ride??

Thanks for reading,

The Josh

[peonybane]

Welcome Home, Soldier

Pairing: N (Cha HakYeon) [VIXX] x Reader

Word Count: 1.5 k

Genre: Idol verse, Military, Romance, Fluff, Angst?

Summary: 21 months. 21 months is how long it’s been since he started his enlistment. At times, you missed him. But at others, it felt like he was still with you– his footprints and all those hidden years together, comforting you– reminding you that you will walk together once more.

a/n: First I would like to thank @minoru-hayashi for their feedback on this story. This is a tearjerker and one that I’ve wanted to write for a while. PLEASE NOTE: I know nothing about what happens when someone is discharged from the Korean Military. I tried to look it up and I couldn’t find any clear/consistent resources in English. So a lot of this is made up but is based on my general knowledge of what I think goes on.

Song: Walking

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21 months. 21 long… long months. Sometimes it felt like it wasn’t that long, like it was just a mere few days since you ran your hand over his freshly buzzed head. Other times it felt like eternity— there were days you wondered if you had imagined it all. 

But it was finally over. All those months apart. All those brief, lingering visits, leaving you wanting for far more. 

It was all finally over. 

Well… not really. But there was no longer as large of a wall between the two of you. You were no longer walking a different but parallel path to him— to your HakYeon.

Getting up and getting dressed had been strangely surreal. You kept everything relatively the same since HakYeon’s been gone. Everything was in its place. You still used the same fabric softener before he left (so that your sheets on the days you missed him most wrapped you in that familiar and calming scent), the same brand of rice (even though you knew he’d scold you for wasting money like that)— it was all a means of keeping him near you, even if just in your mind. 

It certainly helped that his bandmates included you in activities whenever they could. You all missed him. Everyone missed him in their own way. You missed him coming home, late at night (even for the brief time you were living together before his enlistment) and dropping down onto the bed, enveloping you in a hug and falling asleep before you could even rouse yourself enough from sleep to greet him. 

TaekWoon would never admit that he missed him, but you all knew. He started taking on HakYeon’s mannerisms, for one, becoming almost overly affectionate in his hyung’s absence. JaeHwan was probably the most vocal about missing him, often calling you up after seeing something that reminded him of HakYeon. Then the two of you would do something that would comfort you both, whether it be going out for ice cream or playing video games— or rather, HongBin and JaeHwan played video games, cursing at each other while you watched on. WonSik… WonSik was your surprisingly strong one. Despite being the most baby of them and the most emotional, he’d been surprisingly strong— trying to pretend to not miss HakYeon, pretending that he doesn’t miss his guidance, especially with everything that happened in his own life. HongBin took it probably the hardest. HakYeon was always there. Always the strongest, always the one you could turn to for a hug, or for some sort of comfort, or to be a source of strength. SangHyuk stepped up. HakYeon was no longer there to be relied on. So it was all up to him now. He had to be strong one (both literally and figuratively) for everyone else.

The ‘ottokaji’ ringtone on your phone pulled you from your musing as you finished getting ready for the day. Grabbing it off the side table, you smiled. It was a text from JaeHwan letting you know that they’d be there to pick you up soon. Well apparently that ‘soon’ was sooner rather than later, because as you glanced out the window on chance, the group van rolled up to your apartment building, with JaeHwan looking at you from the window of the car, making all sorts of kissy faces at you and waving. 

You couldn’t help but giggle as you grabbed the last of the stuff you needed, you rushed out the door, and practically bounded down your apartment building stairs. At the base of them, you were huffing and puffing as JaeHwan rolled down the window. “Come on! We’re going to be late.”

“Yes, Ken-jhumma.”

“Yah!”

HongBin opened the back door for you and you slid into the car. You greeted all of them as you buckled in and TaekWoon drove off. There wasn’t any worry about over crowding— HakYeon’s parents would be driving the two of you back to your apartment after all of the festivities. 

Through out the car ride towards the base where HakYeon would be discharged, the six of you made small talk, mostly surrounding what you would do at the festivities later and how excited you were to have him back.

Your heart rate began to race in your chest as you drove closer and closer. This was it. The moment you’ve been waiting for for a couple years. As the trees grew sparser and sparser you couldn’t help by feel thankful: his discharge would be private, family and close friends only. No prying fans, it was just be a happy intimate moment before your lives would return to back to their usual chaos before he left to complete his civic duty. 

Despite it being a private ceremony there were many fans waiting outside, all holding up various posters and trying to get as good of a look as possible in the compound. HongBin helped you out of the car as you looked over at all the fans held up posters with HakYeon’s face and some with other idols who were also being discharged. It made you a little nervous as some of the fans glanced over in your direction from behind the barricade, whispering to each other, but JaeHwan squeezed your shoulder reassuringly, helping you relax a little.

A few minutes later (after presenting your pass to the guards, of course), the six of you found yourselves inside the main gate. You looked around the sea of people, all eager to welcome home brothers and sisters, fathers and mothers, sons and daughters, trying to find HakYeon’s family. After what felt like an eternity, you heard HakYeon’s mother call your name. Turning towards her voice, you called back, waving at her frantically. 

Your little group met up with theirs and there were greetings and hugs to be had. HakYeon’s mother was at your elbow, both of you silently supporting each other as the tension in the air rose and rose. It was unbearably exciting but also, deep down, you were scared. 

What if he changed? What if you changed? Could he have met someone else? Question after question ran through your mind. 

A silence fell upon the crowd and it was like a knife had cut through your thoughts— halting them completely. A lieutenant asked that immediate family made their way to a certain building, the rest were to wait in the current area. Hakyeon’s mother gave you a small hug before she joined her husband, heading off to see their son as he finished the last moments of his enlistment.

You stood with SangHyuk, his huge body protecting you from the glaring light of the sun, waiting for the family only ceremony to finish. Even as you chatted about nothing at all, it was nerve wrecking— just standing and waiting. You needed to move, you needed your paths to cross once more. 

Suddenly, the doors leading to the building where the ceremony was being held opened.  The crowd practically moved like one, facing that direction. Everyone shoved passed each other (some more politely than others) trying to meet with their friends and family that they’ve been missing for so long. 

You got lost in the crowd, losing SangHyuk (somehow despite his unruly height) in the process. You stood there, spinning around as the crowd dispersed, trying to catch a glimpse of someone you knew. Then you saw him.

He was like a beacon in the dark. His smile bright, his face tanned from all that marching in the sun. He stood there like a prince in his formal military band uniform, the uniform almost fitting his now bulkier frame almost tightly. His service had aged him, but only just. After all, he seemed to have aged like fine wine, getting better with age. 

Your breath caught in your throat. You couldn’t believe it.

It was like your body knew what it had to do before you even did. You practically launched yourself at him, wrapping your arms around him as your kissed his face, making him laugh and smile even more brightly as he held you against his chest.

HakYeon buried his face in your neck, breathing in your scent and you felt his tears soften the skin of your neck. He whispered, “I missed you.”

Happy tears began to blur your vision as well, one hand reaching up to caress the back of his head, cradling it against you. “I missed you, too. You did well. Thank you.”

He pulled away from your neck long enough to kiss your lips gently. “Thank you.”

You giggled as he pressed his forehead against yours as he squeezed you in his arms. “Welcome home, soldier.”

As always, reviews, comments, asks, and tags are always loved! ~Peony

Also, please note that I do NOT do tagging lists. Please see my FAQ for why.

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[gocchisama]

Rollercoaster of Emotion : A Keyakizaka Story

The “Republic of Keyakizaka” concert took place the week end of 22-23 July, in FujiQ conifer forest. With a schedule matching mine, i had the privilege to attend the two days full of keyakizaness, from unique scenery inside the park to the sharp performance of the girls. I will attempt to bring as much anecdote from the inside as i can, and yes there’s a lot of things to say!

The concert took place near the popular attraction park FujiQ Highland.

Getting tickets as a foreigner might be an hassle. I had to create a Rakuten account, an EMTG account, have a credit card that works, a japanese phone number and address. You can get the last two by submitting to tenso, a japanese service specialized in shipping Japanese goods. After that, it was first come first served so web servers were saturated from fans multiple connections, disabling the service for those who have poor internet. Fortunately the venue capacity was big (12 000 seats) and some gave up because the venue was too far from tokyo (2 hours from bus/3 from train). 6 hours after the start of the selling, i managed to buy 2 tickets (i didn’t choose seats). Something hard, was also to book a bus ( most japanese fans rushed to this service as well) and all hotel were book. I got lucky to find a very affordable airbnb (guesthouse online service) and managed to secure a super early Bus from tokyo to the venue. Vacations were finally starting!

A sneak peek of the queuing line for Keyakizaka goods. There’s three of them.

There’s a reason i wanted to come early: exclusive goods! I wasn’t satisfied with the towel available on the official online store, but the one sold at the venue was a real “coup de coeur”. Hirate Yurina being a very popular member, i didn’t wanted to face a sold-out situation. I arrived at 10AM and the show started at 5PM(afternoon). But there was already a massive line worth 1.5 hours! Easy to tell that Goods are really popular items of collection. I thought i was going to wait in hellfire, but weather was cloudy and the forest around were kind of absorbing the heat. Also we were waiting below the fujiyama rollercoaster so it was fun to see people getting scared 60m above our line. What surprised me was how disciplined fans were : patiently waiting their turn, and quickly purchasing their goods. What looked really long actually moved quite fast. Aki-p was also prepared : there was a huge amount of package behind the selling staff to fulfill everyone’s otaku needs. Thumbs up for japanese neat organization!

Exclusive goods were affordable and high quality.

i was positively surprised at the goods prices. 3000Y 100% cotton T shirts, 3000Y lighsticks and 2000Y the god of items, the oshi towel. Aside from the oshi towel, the biggest value for me was the exclusive fanclub keyakizaka bandana (the one on my bag) with the unbeatable price of 300Y. There was also this 4500Y exclusive T shirt with handmade blazer “humility, kindness, bond” but i skipped due to budget reasons. The highlight was also keyakizaka photoset : for 1000Y, they give you a set of 5 random pictures, either from special silent majority (kohaku version) to futari season (gold uniform). I had a good pull with yuipon, moriya, shida manaka. When i got out, there were hundreds of fans trading like crazy to complete their sets! Some had 30 000 Y worth of photos, just to get a chance to have their oshimen sets complete. As you can expect, a lot of fans keep popular members set for their own collection, and to trade them is very rare. The trading was a raging battle and with my poor 5 pictures, i didn’t tried to join the fray. Even though i could probably catch  Yurina... let’s hope for another chance in the summer tour!

There was so many keyakizaka fans that the park could have been renamed Keyakizaka land.

Keyakizaka performing in Conifere forest was undoubtly a big collaboration with FujiQ Highland. Sony management get a big venue and promotion from FujiQ, while FujiQ ultra boost its attendance rate with all the wota coming to have a good time in the park. I won’t be surprised if they do it again. The scenery was unreal : almost 70% of the park customers were wearing their oshi towel and keyaki T-shirts. After all, the 1500Y admission pass was free for those who had concert tickets (but you have to pay the biggest rollercoasters). It was a great opportunity for group of friends to attend both fujiQ and keyakizaka GIG, but also couples and families. There was members panel scattered over the whole park and fans had to search for their oshi (see above). You could see who were popular according to the lane of fans waiting to get the perfect shot. Zuumin, Monarisa, Neru always had a lane. Techi was very well hidden (at the near edge between 2 rollercoaster) and had like 100 members queuing for her! It took me 1h to find the panel and take a picture, but the hide and seek game was fun.

About the sociology : after a lot of observation, i would say the ratio is 75-25 boys/girls, and most of them were very young 15-20 years old. They probably didn’t lived the Acchan era, and that explain why AKB is declining : AKB didn’t managed to appeal to this new fandom; Nogizaka and Keyaki did. I haven’t seen goods related to other idol group, even from Nogizaka. It was really all about Keyaki. I’ll be honest, it was hard to connect with fans. Langage barrier, also they were already hanging in groups of friend/Focus on trading. I chatted a bit with fans when i was queueing in Fujiyama rollercoaster, and they were surprised i came from France, but that’s about it. On a side note, Fujiyama has nice attractions like Eee janai ka (see videos on youtube) so please check it out for one day (you don’t need more, and go on weekdays) if you have the opportunity to do so!

The actual venue, with a big stage looking like a castle with flags ornaments.

The actual venue was very convenient. There were a lot of staff guiding fans and you just had to cross the bridge to be at the concert. Lot of policemen, security was strict, checking bags and ID. Impossible to resell ticket thanks to this, even with accompany status (the concert didn’t sold out anyway). How it was organized : seats were spread through blocks. For example, if you get A block, you’re very close to the stage, and if you get the number 7-9, you are in the center of the venue. Kami seats were not A1(on the edge, but still good), but A7 (sooo close). Since i bought ticket late, i had F2, which is quite bad, but i was already glad to be there. I had the big left screen to follow the concert (picture above). You were given a balloon to use it during Sekai ni wa ai shikanai. Saturday i would say was filled at 95%, and Sunday was 90%. Mission accomplished.

The girls appeared in brand new horsemen-inspired costume, holding (*cough* confederate *cough*) flags.

The show was finally starting! Big new instrumental intro to lift the atmosphere, again with the army style. People wavering their greenlighstick, all standing up. Techi was standing in the middle with her badass stare like the leader of the army. After this intro, they played Overture and followed by the 3 first singles. First thing i wanted to confirm : No zuumin (imaizumi Yui) also Yonetani nanami chose to focus on her studies in the meantime. Anyway choregraphy went smoothly and the crowd was cheering and doing the mix (wota chant). It’s our way to tell the girls we’re enjoying our time and mutually motivating ourselves. It’s our way to communicate! Overall members had good expressions, like Moriya, Yuuka and Neru, but also Satoh shiori and uemura rina that were dancing on my side. Others like Berika and Techi were kind of warming up, trying to avoid making mistakes.

There were a lot of interactions between fans and the group. Shida Manaka particulary enjoyed shooting on fans but also members.

Aozora and Bokutachi no sensou were pretty original : they put the crowd into work sending big floating air balls that we were bumping around the venue, and girls had waterstream to shower the first lanes. Other members had waterguns. It was really festive and even though bokutachi no sensou is not my favourite song, people were having fun. Aozora to marry is a fan favourite, as the calls were very strong.

Techi entering the scene the coolest way possible

Techi was singing live, with a playback running behind. A double edged sword as if her pitch was off, it could be distinguishly heard, so she focused a lot on her singing. Her voice is more girly than the studio version, which was cute. However, because she wanted to do good, she was restraining herself and her moves lacked expressions. She didn’t interacted much with the crowd, making her cold. As if she was aware of her mistake, she did significantly better Sunday and she felt much more natural. Hearsaying on my way home, a lot were satisfied with her performance, as her aura is “yabai” (so impressive)

Yurina’s performance was followed by Hiragana keyaki 2 songs, “hiragana keyaki” and “boku wa tsukiatteru”. I was pleasantly surprised at how genki, smiling and fluffy the girls were, lifting up the crowd even more. They were so much more expressive than Kanji singles it kind of woke up everyone. The song in studio is standard orthodox idol, but it is a killer during live performance because the lyrics are easy to remember and moves easy to mimic. Very good surprise, i saw myself tagging along, leaving behind all regrets to look ridicule. At the end, Sasaki kumi took charge of the MC. I can see she is comfortable with talking, but topics to talk about could be improved. Other girls were short to comment.

Waterworks  were giving density to the rare performed “Otona wa shinjite kurenai”

Kanji are back with the great “otona wa shinjite kurenai” and the very anticipated “eccentric”. Very solid performance, very sharp and powerful. The girls are in their element and Techi is finally unleashing the darkness within her. We don’t have mix in this song, but people were amazed and couldn’t speak much. It gaves a stronger feeling than Silent majority. Less mainstream, much deeper. I really liked it. Great follow up with Eccentric, people argued the choregraphy was a hit or miss, but i would say definitevely a hit! If felt like the girls were having erratic spasm, but did synchronized move as well. Very technical. The song itself is good, and i saw myself doing the wakame dance (waving my arms), shuffling my towel (while they use their shoes) and shaking my chest. (that was weird).

Something i noticed too in Hohoemi Ga kanashii and Wareta Smartphone. Because Techi is a little bit cranky and mechanical, the chemistry with Neru is not perfect. Techi shines in dark songs, but on her path to become a great idol, she needs to express herself more in normal situation. It feels like Neru is assisting her rather than being a balanced pairing. On the other song, Berika is reminding me of Paruru, doing the barely minimum during performance. I know it’s funny to put someone awkward in a sexy song, but i don’t think it’s helping her to grow. The contrast with the sexyness of Moriya is making her look bad. She looks more comfortable in songs like Aozora ga chigau. In the meantime, Mona risa are fooling around while Yuuka try to focus on the choregraphy. I personally like Wareta smartphone.

Sometimes the wota culture can be misunderstood. 

We reached a climax with the 3 last songs, “Kataru nara mirai wo”, “Takaku tobe” and “Te wo tsunaide Kaerou ka”? Kataru Nara is an absolute jewel of choregraphy and the mix were really strong. Before that we had a Hiragana and Kanji dance medley very similar to what happened in Ariake. Some moves were recycled, but i don’t mind as the girl had little time to practice. Special shoutout to Suzumoto Miyu who is by far the best dancer of the groupe. Saito Kyoko dance battled with her and she was very decent too. As people were hyping, they send Takaku tobe which once again blowed me away at how popular of a song it was. Perhaps the instrumental got changed to sound more upbeat, but everyone was tagging along with the moves and quirky mimics. Hiragana songs are really popular! To answer to that, Kanji Keyaki used Te wo tsunaide, another popular song that worship the yuukanen pairing. People were warming up at Yuukanen chasing each other, in a very cute way. The cheering was pretty even with Takaku tobe.

The Encore escalated quickly, with loud screams and fireworks.

To me the big highlight was the encore, Fukyouwaon. People knew it was the last powerful song so we kind of put everything to it. The girls exploded and the pyrotechnics made it look like a warfield. It was so funny i shouted “boku wa yada” with Techi similar to if i was in hellfest, surprising people next to me (i thought it was part of the mix , sorry). Anyway, people did their best mix and you couldn’t hear the rollercoaster next to us. Fukyouwaon went from the “weakest” A-side to “best A-side on stage” haaands down. It was truly marvelous and you could see the girls were enjoying the crowd hype as their moves were growing in power (Techi was smiling from enjoyment).

Finally we finished with our anthem kanji/hiragana together, Keyakizaka no Uta. We kind of let loose after the final rush and enjoyed the last bit of time together. We had fireworks and it almost felt the girls weren’t aware. Since we were around 7PM, it was night and you could completely see the fireworks. People were having a blast. I heard “sugeee” “yabaaai” “majiiii de” from everywhere when it started to lighten up the sky.

Aki-p used credit card platinum. It was very effective.

In conclusion, it was a great experience to live as a fan. You could either skip Saturday or Sunday as it was the same setlist. Unfortunately, Yonetani and Zumiko absence were quite heavy, leaving their fans bittersweet. Also there was only eccentric as new song, making fans craving for more. That’s why it can’t beat Ariake coliseum yet. But fear not! Because Keyaki summer schedule is very busy; they still have to perform the summer tour, handshakes, summer sonic, fuji rock and Tokyo idol festival. I think Zuumin will come back avoiding the hectic schedule, just in time for their biggest stop, Makuhari Messe. Keyaki story is not over yet!

I was impressed once again by japanese crowd control. They brought special train for people to come back safely to tokyo. The guideline was perfect, and they regulate trains so people don’t overcrowd it. Also it was free, so i only paid 500 yen to come back from Fujisan to Chiba! They really do the maximum for the fans and i’m really grateful.

It’s not all the time you see a town full of wota, wearing their oshi towel like it’s pretty standard; to see fans helping each other to take turns of 2shots, praising their respective oshimen quality; a young daughter refusing his also-fan dad to accompany her in handshake to not be embarassed in front of her oshimen... Now i realized what the true meaning of “republic of keyakizaka” is : people bonding, having fun together, enjoying life around the positive energy that brings the group.

- Gocchisama

En route toward new keyaki adventures! Thanks for reading.

[awholenewworld-dcp17]

"if you weren't you, then we'd all be a little bit less we"

Growing up I've always been told "family comes first." "When your friends aren't there for you, your family always will be." "Family is forever." These concepts had been instilled in my mind at such an early age not only through words, but actions and the very nature of my life. There were definitely times when I would look around and acknowledge that "okay, not all families are as close as mine, and that's okay." But it wasn't until I came down here that I realized this universal truth of family-being-the-most-important-thing-in-your-life may not be as universal as I thought. Let me just start off my saying there's nothing wrong with living your life otherwise. I've met so many people who have different priorities and I'll even admit - there have been times when I wish I could be able to be more like them. To focus more on me, on my career, on my friends. To be able to worry less. To care less. But that's just not me. Starting from the very beginning weeks of my adventure, I thought about my ppl back home a lot. It was amazing to be able to share all of these new experiences with new people and bond with my roommates to create unique friendships, but all the while I had sometimes wished I could also share it with the ones I already loved and left behind. It got easier to be able to enjoy this experience for what it is and embrace my independence as time went on, but there were always those days when I would be riding pirates or splash mountain and wishing my dad was there with me, or wishing I had jess to blame when I secretly wanted to ride the astro orbiter. Needless to say, disney is where I grew up with my fam, so it has only been natural for me to be nostalgic of those days in the place where so many of my favorite memories were created. I wouldn't sit here and say I've spent the last 3 months longing to be home and spending every waking moment missing the people there (tbh ain't nobody got time for that even if I wanted to), but this experience has made me appreciate more than ever that home IS such a happy place, and I'm grateful for the people there that make it that way. So as you can probably imagine, the week in Florida when home came HERE for a little bit was one of the absolute best so far. It all started with a visit from Aunt Linda and Uncle Steven. I showed them around my complex and spent about the first 20 breathless minutes answering rapid fire questions about my program, lol. They took me to a lovely and salubrious lunch at bahama breeze and then on a very unique thrift shopping adventure. They offered to buy me ANYTHING I wanted from the thrift store, and though the $25 dishwasher was tempting, I resisted. No but seriously, I really did enjoy my time catching up with them. It's so nice to see family and get the chance to bring them into my own little world here. The mr. softee ice cream was also a plus, but that's besides the point. Before we knew it, it was time to go meet my mom and dad at their new ("week" long rental) (three bedroom) condo! If the nostalgia wasn't already strong enough, being back at caribe cove strengthened it a little bit more. I helped them get settled in and re-explore the old stomping grounds, and soon enough it was time for me to be off to work :/. That was one of the slowest nights I've had here, as all I could think about was my family down here in Orlando having fun without me, but thanks to them - I had some surprise visitors asking for some ice cream! Between mom's narration/recording of snap chats, uncle Stevens high decibel excited voice, and aunt Linda's flash from her digital camera, it was only a matter of seconds before every person in the shop knew my family was here to visit. Lol. I ensured that dad got the best (and largest amount of) ice cream (nonna d's oatmeal lace, yum) and sent them on their way. I heard Mickey was pretty good to them at the register, you'll have to ask them about that doe. The next day I had work again and consequently missed the arrival of my dear cousins. Matthew, Jamee, and Matt were scooped from the airport by mom and dad that morning and directly started their Disney adventure at Hollywood Studios. When I got off, I boated over to meet them (what a beautiful change from the post-work bus transportation I'm used to) and we made our way over to none other than the magical magic kingdom. I could tell they already were running on fumes from such a long day, but you can't Disney half butt, so we pressed on. We got to watch the beautiful Wishes (a night time spectacular, ending May 11, 2017), and explore as much of the park as humanly possible. I convinced them to try the churros, which may have been in the running for the highlight of my night. I beat them all in buzz lightyear, but that I'm used to, so it didn't make the running. Also, dad got to join the club of being on screen for monsters inc, lol - looks like he needs a hug. No worries tho, mom gave him that hug on screen. Supe cute. When in line for splash mountain, we realized time was running out and it was likely to be our last ride of the night, which we came close to accepting (side eye at Matthew and dad who knew there was still a chance for one more). After exiting the world of the b'rers, we HUSTLED over to big thunder, and squeezed in one more ride with 1.5 minutes to spare. No but really, we were the very last train to run that night. Now that's what I call doing disney right. That night, I stayed at the condo. I snapped the metal bar on the pull out couch in half just by sitting on it. It was a funny experience to add to the adventure, but if that isn't a sign to lay off the churros I don't know what is, lolS. So matthew and I got our rest that night with a metal pole in our backs, but TBH we were tired enough that it didn't even matter. The next day called for some animal kingdom exploration. We started off the day right, that is - a ride on the famous expedition Everest, which was actually a lot more fun than I remembered. Still not sure if that particular ride was actually superior or I just was happy to be with my fam, but either way I'll take it. Matt really liked it, too. He's into the g force thing. Jamee giggled the whole time. Dad sat with a stranger. But if I gave you a play by play of every single thing we did we would be here all day. Some other highlights from the DAK of course were the festival of the lion king, and our kick start on drinking around the world with some fancy drinks in Africa. And of course, (thnx Lynne!) we got to see the harp player up close and personal. We traveled back to magic kingdom that night, as per usual. We finished up most of the things that we had missed the night before (still second guessing if we should have waited 130 mins for space mountain or not) and then left the park. Before closing - I know, shocker. We relaxed at the condo pool with some beverages that night and got to bed relatively early. My final day w the cuz' was spent in Epcot. I had work in the afternoon but I got some time with them in the morning. When I said goodbye the first time, I was sad and cried. So then later they came into my work as a detour part of their drinking around the world showcase. I said goodbye again but it was still sad and I had fomo. So then, of course, at the end of my shift they come back to the boardwalk AGAIN and we all got ice cream before they drove me back to my apartment. That was the kind of goodbye closure I needed to last me the final two months, lol. High key miss them lots tho, but we had a blast. After work the following day, I met mom and dad in Japan (Epcot) for dinner, and HAD to try the Andalusian nights. We hopped over to animal kingdom post dinner, to enjoy rivers of light once more. We had really good seats this time, and got some cool pics around night time DAK. The next day of that week I had class and work, but typs mom and dad picked me up at the end of my long day so I didn't have to get the bus. I actually had off again the following day (ty managers) so I was able to spend the night at the condo again. The following morning (and by this point I was exhausted so when I say morning I mean 12pm), we enjoyed some lunch at Cici's and some magic kingdom magic. I had to stop at company D which is right by MK, so why would we choose any other park?? Ya know?? Highlight of that day was getting to ride the up and running railroad train!! Before we knew it (guess that's what happens when you sleep in in Orlando), though, it was time to go get chris and jess and jaime from the airport! I was so super happy to see them but that was to be expected I suppose. I got to do universal with them, which was a fun and different experience. Harry Potter world was a blast, and they even convinced me to go on the dueling dragons for the first time. I scream laughed the whole time, which won me the title of jaime's new favorite person to ride a roller coaster with. Also we had some butter beer on mommom, and got to see the incredible!!!!!! Ollivanders show. We kind of were all over the place, but got A LOT done considering. My roommate rebecca also joined us that day. We got to be one of the first ever to go on the new jimmy Fallon ride, which was really really cool, but slightly underwhelming considering all of the press it had been getting. I rode rip ride rocket next to jess and we chose the same song so we could jam together, which was pretty legit. G-l-a-m-o-r-o-u-s, na mean? Overall we had a pretty fantastic time, but I had to leave them around 5 to go to work :/. They also visited me at work that night, which was a nice little pick me up considering my how tired I was from all day in the park/working. Next day we went to ... you guessed it! MK! And started off in adventureland. We did pirates first (anyone else NOT remember that by drop from when we were little??) and made our way clockwise throughout the park. Since the park had been at such high capacity they were doing the parade twice, so we saw the 3 o'clock parade at 12! We skipped a few things, knowing we would be back again the next day (spoiler alert - that night too) and ended over at buzz light year which unfortunately was shut down!!! We got a fast pass though to come back later, but had guest services switch it over to Epcot since that was our next stop! At Epcot, we went on test track and soarin' and the land and ate at sunshine seasons before making our way over to the showcase to travel the world. We started in Mexico, where we even got to meet Donald Duck. Chris was so excited, but he def was trying to be cool and hide it. A great start to our travels, even though I was slightly mis that my contact was scratched and I couldn't see. Next was Norway, where jaime thought the statue of the gnome from frozen was dobby. Lol. Next was china - we detoured here for a bit to watch the acrobats and enjoy some potstickers and plum wine. Germany was a blast, we got some really cool pictures here with our grapefruit beer and pretzel. Italy is always my favorite food wise, I split a chocolate covered cannoli with mom and it was deeeelish. We also had limoncello here. That was something. Chris was doing this cool thing where he made us say cheers in the language of the natives of the country we were in. Our journeys continued through America, Japan, morocco, etc. We stopped for a little dance party in morocco and of course revisited the Andalusian nights. France was fun, UK was funner (Ello mate we're in London would you like some fish n chips). We made it to Canada just in time and ended our Epcot night there for the fire works. But of course, it was only 9, and MK was open til 12! So we hopped on the monorail and made our way back over. Night time disney really is the best disney. We got to a bunch more rides including Winnie the Pooh and the Snow White mine train. We even got to see the kiss goodnight!! The next day, the sad and final day, we finished up MK. We had a few fastpasses, so we got to ride space mountain and mine train sans wait times, which was really nice. We got to see the infamous country bear jamboree. We also went to ride splash mountain for a second time, and boy was that SOMETHING! I felt bad for being so excited about such a miserable thing to the rest of my party, but the ride broke down and we got EVAC'd!! Mom shared in my glory with me. That was legit on my DCP bucket list, and one of the few that I had absolutely no control over! It really delayed us and put a wrench in our plans for the day, but it was cool to be able to exit the log mid b'rer world and be escorted backstage on one of my favorite rides. Big thunder was shut down, and I felt real bad about that :(, so the mine train actually was the last ride of our day. I think every time I go on it I love it more and more. After squeezing in the last few things of the day, we made time - even though we really didn't have any - for a little TLC sans C (Turkey legs and churros without the churros for all you noobs out there). That was a good time. When all was said and done, we exited the MK as a fam for the last time for a long time, and they took me back to my apartment before making their way to the airport. That was supe said because I really love them. And I miss them. And I had a really really good time with them.

[cwebberphotography]

Two New YouTube videos: https://youtu.be/ipOWwYufwa4

Holi is the festival of colours. It’s also the day I chose to take a break from Pokhara. After breakfast I got a ride on Nirmal’s motor bike to the bus stop. I didn’t get a seat for about 20 minutes so I bumped around in the isle. Then I walked four hours up to Panchase. Got lost, stopped a lot.  I asked directions a couple times and when I got to Green Village I was pulled in for a tea and dal baht. Arjun said if I stay a week it would be 700 NPR/night for a room and three meals a day plus all the tea I can drink.  Now I have lots of time to meditate explore, photograph, sit with the cats and watch them make food in the Gurung kitchen.

There are no decorations in this place. Mud walls and floors a fire on the ground some pots and pans and stools five inches off the ground. Somehow everything is possible in the kitchen. They have a big pot that acts as the sink/compost which they feed to the buffalo once a day. And running water outside that comes out glacier cold. After lunch I walked the trail to one of many Shiva Temples. Lots of good view points and half way up stopped in a secluded spot to meditate on a rock. Found a tree and put my hand on it to see if it would speak to me. It just said he was old as time immemorial. When I came back at sunset it was raining and hailing so I went by the fire and the cool cat warmed my lap while they made dinner. Eventually my legs fell asleep and thankfully the cat moved off. Then slowly the life blood came flowing back again. They hired a carpenter from the next village to stay there and make 20 bee hives and furniture. He was treated like a second class citizen the entire time, he ate last, only millet and dal, usually outside or on the floor away from everyone else and had his own plates and cup…I thought he was a slow neighbour at first as he chatted on about god-knows.  While eating he was striking all sorts of poses he was also drinking lots of local wine.

Soon I’m off to bed. Shuba raatri. What stars aren’t clouded over are completely over taken by the brightness of the full moon. Made even more powerful by the lack of power on top of the mountain.

A letter to the man who just arrived: This place will eat you alive. If you let it. You may leave a different person. You may not like the long cold nights and the silence of the days may cause a blissful malaise. Bamboo forests and fires in the distance. Dusk in the meadow. Hermits who don’t wave back, abandoned foundations and empty river crossings. Cow bells hidden by mountain passes. Himalayas tower over me tall with white clouds blown over, smeared across time from day break to now, they stand watch in the North over tiny galaxies in the leaves.

The higher I get the better I feel. Nepal is the top of the world. This place just got a road in 2012 and electricity is also new. I can take an evening stroll and see nothing but the view. The stars shine bright and the food is fresh within a few feet. There are no preservatives no refrigerator and the air and water are clean. The only voices I hear are miles away.

The sun emits radio waves through the vacuum of space. Exactly two months into this trip. Two months ago I left home now I’m in a cave in Nepal in a mountain in the forest with my feet up. I see maybe three or four people everyday. Wake with the sun. Ma lights two incense and makes tea and I stretch and gaze at the Himalayas. Wash my face and eat breakfast then walk into the mountains to find Shiva temples and small caves. Pink and red rhododendron trees line the path. Sit in the sun. nap on a stoop, my jacket packs into little pillow. Smell of wet green forest and only the sound of birds and falling leaves occasional bees and far away single engine airplanes. I’ve had too much dal baht. Probably eaten my weight in rice. Singing Om with John Lennon listening to Let It Be the sun dries my tears as I descend the mountain. Several Beatles references this week have brought back the thought that as time goes on coincidences and synchronisities will grow as well. The song Across the Universe has new meaning for me now as Lennon sings the mantra Jay Guru Deva and then says Om.

Fog straddled the mountain and caressed it from all angles. As I pass flowers after flowers and my path is lined with red pedals the smell of a woman enters my nostrils and I know it’s no woman but the fragrance of God and it’s he who makes all the beautiful women smell as good as they do. Without flowers there would be no perfume.

Green Village guest house is at least 25 years old. Arjun’s grandma’s older brother lived in town and lost everything in a card game so he came here where there were only a few buffalo farmers. He built the original place and lived here 50 years before he was robbed and returned to town. Slowly his family moved up the mountain and started the first tea house and added to it as others came to make a full-fledged ‘hotel’. I had a lot of questions for Arjun, he said they go to town once a month for supplies sometimes less sometimes more. Sometimes they’re without power for months at a time and before the road his aunt would walk both ways.

Today I was caught in the rain. Turned hail storm. I sat under a tree to stay as dry as possible then continued to shoot. Someone who knows Nama the Mother is here now. He’s my age and working in England and is home visiting for a funeral. He says he’s Buddhist and could not do vipassana because he’s not strong enough.

Bishal left this morning after another good talk.  Also my phone is dead and there is no sign of power coming back on. We had breakfast around 6:30 and lunch after 10 a.m. Between we chatted about London, meditation, smoking, family, LSD, books, music and getting together in Pokhara. His family caste is from Himalayas, the Gurung warrior caste, and have been with the British Army for 200 years. He told me two stories of vipassana he’s heard. One was his friend ran away early on the third day and another friend did it and told his long time girlfriend after that he had been cheating and also has a wife. Today I saw Ma with a pile of buffalo shit in her hand walking down the path.

Woke at six and had a millet pancake which includes five teaspoons of sugar, water, eggs and honey on top. The moon is still high in the sky as the sun rises. Mountains are invisible and the sky is blue. The dew and condensation drops from the roof and ceiling as the local news plays on the radio and the dude hammers away at bee hives. I went to a part of the mountain with no birds or bees or breeze and felt complete silence. It’s fleeting and actually deafening. After it disappeared I was happy to hear again. Ok with the radio, the birds and bees the chatter in any language was welcome. Here I’m able to meditate all day and stretch and read and be 100% in nature all the time. Best of all I have no worries. No worries of the future or present. All my food and shelter are taken care of, my toilet, clothes, TV time at night when there is power. Even without power or electricity I’m fine and happy.

Occasional sense desires come but that’s why I’m here. To get away from cake and chips and jungle talkies and tourists because soon enough my life will be turned upside down in Japan and Kathmandu. Monday of this week like the last 10 at least have come and gone without a whimper. Just a smile if I realize which day it is. It truly is your job you hate not a certain day of the week.

After an hour sit in my room I walked the path to Arthur and found a spot to sit in the sun. Stopping every 10 feet to smell a new smell or listen or stare far away and regain my long distance sight which dissolves in the confines of a city. Seeing people on these trails is as rare as seeing a moose in Canada. I heard people have around 60,000 thoughts (conscious and subconscious) a day and 95% of them are the same as yesterday. We are all writing our stories day by day. I would like for mine to have no repeats.

It’s Thursday, yesterday I had a hot water bucket bath and today I did my laundry which may never dry. As I walked the ridge I could hear two women in the bush and figured they were pruning trees for buffalo like the woman I came across on the way up, way up in a tree. After sitting I heard them closer, then saw four human size bunches of leaves go down the path laughing and chatting along. These people are masters of camouflage.

After an afternoon nap, out my window a man and Ma were carrying wood on their foreheads and dumping it. She’s old and he’s older and I found myself watching thinking maybe they’d let me stack the wood. I asked Arjun and he said go ahead and grab a basket. If she can do it so can I. Now she’s stacking and he’s carrying so I grab a basket and start. After 1.5 hours working bare foot the pile disappeared. It’s hard work, and if you stop paying attention to what you’re doing for one second you can really hurt yourself. That night I had two roxies (local wine) and watched the Waterboy until her Hindi soaps came on.

Pani is water. Jaro is cold. Basa means sit. Chiya is tea. Chiini is sugar.

Second last day a man from Vancouver came and we talked most of the time. He’s 44 has a house and family. Works for the city as an engineer and micro-doses LSD and mushrooms for ideas and to stay fresh. He said he couldn’t live without meditating before bed. I said I also enjoy it. On the walk down Ram Dass said meditation is a method and a trap. You need to become trapped in it for it to work but ultimately it is a method and should be dropped. The goal is not to be a meditator but to be free.

The days are long and life is short. I take it one hour at a time. I love laughing with Nama and Arjun. I could live in this area but it’s changing fast. The road is starting to be used more and people searching for solitude are all coming here. Today a picnic bus came with people crammed in and over flowing onto the roof.

After a long walk I went to warm up and watch the festivities. As soon as I sat down two guys grabbed me and forced me to dance a fast song. I danced with an old man who looks like Gandhi with foggy glasses and missing teeth. My reward was some of the best food I’ve had to date.

Thankful to be traveling alone and for strangers who dance.

      Seven days in Bhangjyang Two New YouTube videos: Holi is the festival of colours. It's also the day I chose to take a break from Pokhara.