#i need to go watch the zubat mom episode

[eclipse-song]

been sitting here all morning like

[shayne-or-something-blog]

Episodes 4-6

Episode 4 and we're still getting flashbacks to the first episode.

Ash had a chik-fil-a cow suit just ready for that pun.

Pikachu decides to take a nap even though just a second ago he was walking with Ash just fine.

All bug pokemon worship Misty.

Have no fear Ash is here, blatent Underdog copyright infringement.

Pidgey's Gust attack in episode one sends Ash flying, Pidgeotto's Gust attack barely moves Weedle at all. Ash’s Pidgeotto is a bitch by comparison.

Samurai bug catcher guy was trained by the blade and tips fedora mightily.

How did he even hear about Ash to begin with?

Why does he keep pulling a rubber sword on people as his way of greeting them? What kind of manners?

Pidgeotto just whipped Weedle without getting hit once, but is somehow too tired to fight.

Pinsir somehow has compound-eyes, an ability not introduced until Gen 3.

Ever sending a Metapod into battle, ever.

Kudos for showing Metapod just getting cut in half though, that's rad.

He legit said Metapod using Harden was clever...that's all it can do.

Harden battle begins, goes on for way too long.

Cardboard tank will protect Jesse and James from Beedrill, yeah okay.

Why did neither of them even try something different? Like, String Shot or something?

Beedrill swarm is coming, better pull out my Pokedex.

You have to aim to return your Pokemon? Who thought that was a good idea?

Pikachu shocks Ash and Misty but only Ash takes damage. Misty is a ground-type confirmed.

I wish the "Who's that Pokemon" weren't always just the main Pokemon of that episode. Make it challenging.

So Beedrill took Metapod to the Kakuna tree where Ash and Misty end up going, but then don't leave any Beedrill there to guard said Metapod.

Kakuna tree mass evolves the moment our protagonists show up, for a reason.

Samurai guy has a log cabin just chilling within running distance of Kakuna tree.

Everyone rips on Ash so hard, like he could've just stopped the entire swarm of Beedrill from kidnapping that Metapod.

Second person to reference all 3 trainers of the other trainers from Pallet Town but still only lists Gary by name.

Kakuna tree has replenished it's supply of Kakuna through the night.

Team Rocket voice actors changed.

Ash thinks that if he runs past the Beedrill they'll just forget he was the one that fucked Weedle up and fight Jesse and James.

It works.

A bunch of Weedle eat the paper tank. The paper. tank.

Metapod doesn't wanna go in the Pokeball because Ash didn't die for him. What a guy.

Ash falls over nothing just to throw Metapod and have a reflective moment on something that he didn't even do. Character development made easy.

Metapod fucks that Beedrill's world up for life and then evolves into Butterfree, leaving me with ruined expectations on how long it takes Pokemon to evolve for the rest of the series.

Apparently it takes a week for Metapod to evolve into Butterfree, what have Ash and Misty been doing for the last week?

How does Ash just know all these moves his Pokemon have immediately upon them evolving?

Sleep Powder doesn't even have that great of accuracy but hits everything in the forest basically.

Apparently his Metapod evolving makes him a true master in the eyes of rubber sword guy even though it's literally just a matter of time. You could leave Metapod in a puddle for a week and it'll still evolve.

Team Rocket somehow made the paper tank into Kakuna suits and hung themselves from the Kakuna tree? These are the antagonists.

Five episodes in and this theme song still jams so hard.

This is the episode that begins Jesse and James' hole digging fetish.

Team Rocket step in their own pitfall trap...I mean...come on.

Flint sells rocks...he sells rocks.

Looks can be decieving, beard prejudice.

What kind of ten year old uses the word "revitalize"

Another Nurse Joy, thus begins the vast network of identical twins that all took the same profession.

Flint's laugh is so fake, who is trying to fool?

Ash stares at Misty's ass, my guy.

Snap on lights, classy move, Brock. Brock’s Gym is complete with rock terrain that easily snaps together.

The weird jump Brock did seemed unnecessary, why even have those stairs?

Let's be honest, the first time we saw Onix we thought it was the strongest thing ever.

Onix uses Bind before Brock gave it the order.

Ash's aim with his returns is ass, but he blames it on Onix.

Flint takes Ash to spy on Brock and his ten younger siblings, that's not weird.

Brock has ten brothers and sisters, giggity.

Deadbeat dad and dead mom, slow down there Pokemon.

Let's hook your Pikachu up to a power plant to power it up. Pokemon logic.

River is dry making the power plant not operational, but let's not say that until after we're here.

Ash just let's the dirty hobo hook shit up to his Pikachu without even saying a word.

Misty finally says something intelligent but Ash says he's going to go all by himself (While getting help from Flint)

Ash says, "If I can take it you can take it" while walking on a stairmaster and his Pikachu is having a power plant put into it's cheeks.

Gust has literally changed every time it's been used in this show so far.

Flying is weak against rock, so my Geodude is gonna grab at your Pidgeottos’ feet until it faints.

Pikachu's random discharge sets all the lights on fire, but we just ignore that.

Ash wants to battle to the death as Pikachu fainted but he wants to continue.

Oh, the fire actually mattered after all, leading to some Deus Ex Aqua letting Pikachu fuck Onix up.

Ash has 10 people on him and thinks it's all in his head. He's actually crazy.

Brock's character changed so drastically in this one episode. He went from calling Pikachu a nerd to being a softie in 10 minutes.

Brock wants to be the best at making Pokemon get it in, and enlists Ash to do that for him.

Cold spaghetti for breakfast and cereal for dinner, these kids really do need a father.

Agrees that he has to pay Misty back, then tries to run away from her.

Why were Team Rocket even in this episode?

Zubat. Just. Zubat.

Wow I hate this scientist immediately.

The lights hanging from the cave are fucking up all the Pokemon, so instead of just pulling them down or turning them off, Seymour the Scientist just watches.

These poems are almost as bad as the ring from the telephone.

Pokemon are aliens, Moon Stone spaceship.

Clefairy is holding a Moon Stone but isn't evolving?

Seymour stops Ash from catching a Pokemon under the pretense "I'm sure you understand" but there's literal no context to what Ash is supposed to understand.

Ash understands anyway.

"Trouble?" Team Rocket announces as Ash triggered their trap card.

Random "You can't join us" thrown at Ash even though he never said anything about joining them.

Brock randomly catches a Zubat offscreen even though he's only a Rock-type trainer. Your ploy to get me to like that shitstorm of a Pokemon won't work.

Misty just throws a Pokeball in the water. Sure Staryu may like it, but that was a fast moving river, that thing is gone.

Ash has never seen Pokemon food.

Seymour and Ash both decide to eat Pokemon food.

Pikachu is the Naruto of Pokemon. Makes friends with everything by just saying his name over and over.

This one particular Clefairy was holding the almighty fragment of Moon Stone that made the thing glow and cause the rest of the Clefairy to show up.

Clefairy rave.

Ash doesn't understand Clefairy, but understands Pikachu because it's "his Pokemon".

Ash can only understand 90% of Pikachu's words, the rest must be done in a game of shitty charades.

Clefairy worship and pray to the Moon Stone, causing Seymour to lose his shit over space travel.

Seymour the Scientist just turned into Velma, but if she wasn't hot or interesting but instead the devil.

Onix versus Ekans results in a "size doesn't matter" joke from Jesse.

Jesse and James are able to move this MASSIVE meteor with no one noticing or making a noise.

I'm really confused on how much of each other's language Pokemon and people know.

So many Pokemon know Counter in the show.

Mass Metronome is just one of those "Put your hands in the air" moments.

Misty continues to have inner ear problems as moving her head back and forth slowly makes her dizzy.

Sing-Song Seymour is still a cunt.

The Clefairy Metronome explodes the Moon Stone into smaller Moon Stones, only now making some of them evolve into Clefable? I can’t follow what’s happening.

Secondary Clefairy/Clefable rave entices Seymour to live with them.

Postcards from space comment.

Why does Gary make fun of Ash here? Didn't they only meet once and for like, less than a minute? What makes them rivals, they barely know each other exist.

PokeRap is still bomb.