#i need a tag for dumbass posts like this they're so fucking funny to make LMAOOO
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the-acid-pear · 6 months ago
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Y'know this little throwaway gag is so bizarre to me and I know this game is a bit very different to 2 and 3 but look at Matt's reaction when Jack raids the place in 3:
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You'd argue he's simply stopping Jack bc he hates this guy and he also hates this job which Could Be True but i highly doubt bc overall despite his virginity and overall cursed vibe, Matt seems to be a good employee, by all means (I mean, Peter literally gave him a vacation instead of firing him in 2, so that says a lot).
Plus, Dave hates this guy as much as he hates him! He literally always calls him creepy and, AND!
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This is the only footage you get of the prize corner in 2. Which is also the first game to show Matt and Dave's disdain for one another, Dave being likely more scared of Matt than Matt will ever be of him.
Which is all very curious. 2 does set a drastic change for Matt too with him going from being just strange to outright creepy, so was the old pizza place closing something that actually affected him or was he consistently that creepy all along? And if the later, did he just start hating Dave after that or did they always have beef and they simply had some sort of arrangement (or even higher word from Steven who tended to let Dave do whatever he wanted in general) that let him do so?
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acecopularbignaturals · 1 year ago
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I spent like 30 minutes tracking this stupid fucking post down bc it's haunted me for years and is also extremely ace coded
⚠️ NSFW TEXT ⚠️
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naturesapphic · 6 months ago
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Hey, I really enjoyed the last fanfic you did for me and I was wondering if you could do another Rhea Ripley x Reader where they're watching Backlash at home, and when JD and Finn come out to help Damien Reader forgets Rhea's hurt and says something like " where's Rhea" and Rhea's like "Im right here"
Cause I keep forgetting she's hurt and thinking she's gonna show up.
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Backlash
Rhea ripley x fem!reader
Warnings: fluff
You were sitting on the couch with your girlfriend Rhea ripley watching backlash. Damien was fighting against jey uso and out of no where Finn came running out and tried to get jey but was kicked in the face by him and landed flat on his back. I don’t think Damien even noticed that he tried to help let alone him being out there.
“Bro what the fuck! Damien! Pay attention!” You huffed out and crossed your arms as you payed close attention to the match. Rhea gave you a side eye and smiled at your behavior. The dogs came over, including Bella, and sat on y’all’s laps. Luna went over to Rhea and barry went over to you, whining for your attention.
You grabbed him in your arms and wrapped your arms around his body as you continued to watch the match. Barry seemed content and stopped whining. A few moments after jey had Damian pinned down and jey was about to win when jd appeared and grabbed damiens foot and put it on the rope to disrupt the countdown.
Everyone screamed and your mouth opened in shock and you were getting anxious but relieved that jd came out to help, even though you don’t like him. Then you realized that Rhea isn’t out yet. “Where’s Rhea?” You said not realizing that your girlfriend was right beside you. “Im right here?” She said and gave you a dumbfounded look. You looked at her sheepishly and blushed from embarrassment.
“Please forget that I said that.” You stated and she smirked. “Not a chance doll.” She said and you groaned in annoyance. “You are never gonna let me live this down are you?” You said and she shook her head now. “Im telling everyone and tweeting about it now. It’s too fucking funny.” She laughed and went on her phone tweeting and making Instagram stories about it as you sat on the side and pouted at her.
“You’re mean.” You said as Rhea pointed the camera towards you and laughed playfully. She scooted closer to you and started peppering your face with kisses to make up for her teasing towards you. You started to giggle and your face flushing red at the kisses and attention she was giving you. She stopped recording and put “she’s my dumbass but she’s my dumbass and I fucking love her.” She said on her story and posted it and tagged you in it.
You continued to blush and Rhea kept smirking at you as y’all continued to watch backlash together. A few more moments later and Damien pinned down jey and kept his belt. Everyone cheered including you and Rhea then groaned when everything went to shit between the judgement day. “They definitely need mami back because what is this shit? They are so childish my gosh.” You said and Rhea laughed, wrapping her arms around you.
“Is that right?” She asked and you nodded. “Mami makes the rules.” You said shrugging, knowing that you were right Rhea nodded her head at you. “Do you want to watch some trash reality tv now?” You asked her and she smiled. “Of course.” She stated and you went onto her lap facing her and snuggled into her strong arms. Barry whining for y’all’s attention so you put him beside the both of you and started petting him. Rhea turned something on and placed the remote down to wrap her arms around you, securing you as you laid your head on her shoulder. Even though it’s sad that Rhea had to be on break because of her injury, you are still glad for this opportunity to spend time with your girlfriend.
A/n: I hope this is what you wanted @drsheperd-bartley18 ! And I hope the rest of y’all enjoyed! Remember that my Melanie martinez, Billie eilish and the rest of my characters requests are still open! And remember to stay hydrated and to rest! I love yall! :)
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niktoes · 8 months ago
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₊˚♡˚₊ word salad headcanons for könig as your best friend ₊˚♡˚₊
♡ just konig things. prematurely posted by accident last time, so if anyone saw that, no you didn't ♡
♡ on this blog, könig's name is otto ♡
Tags: headcanon, silly platonic friend stuff, best friend könig, reader insert
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♡ Otto is a man who makes the best of friends. As an adult with a busy life, making friends is hard. Plus, he's acutely aware of the fact that he can be awkward when he's first meeting someone, and because of that he generally isn't the easiest man alive to make friends with. Most of his friendships happened because something just clicked, and everything worked from there. When it happens, the easy chemistry that lets conversation feel effortless and him feel understood? Yeah, cherished doesn't even begin to cover how close to his heart he holds your friendship. Any of hid close friendships, really, are things he values deeply. If what you need is a ride-or-die kind of guy, that is exactly what he is.
♡ This friendship looks like a relationship from the outside. Sometimes his being playful can come across as unintentionally flirtatious (wanna talk abt the 'they're dating' rumours every set of best friends has? yeah, it's like that. And he, for one, thinks its hilarious), but it's all just in good fun.
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♡ There are several ways that he might approach you having a rough time in life, whether that's due to your work or issues in your personal life. Mans is spiteful. That's just a facet of himself that can't be removed or avoided if something really rots his fucking socks. And by spiteful, I mean he's the kind of guy that'll stop in the middle of a crosswalk to very carefully tie his shoelaces if a driver's impatient and pushing the boundary on the pedestrian crossing light. Malicious compliance is his cup of tea, too, if it applies. He's been alive nearly forty years, man, so no matter what problem you're dealing with, his plots for petty vengeance come naturally and he and is not shy about sharing them with you for the sake of justice (or catharsis- that too).
♡ This could just be a him thing, but if he's your friend- like, really good friend, he fully backs you no matter what. If you're out here being confidently incorrect about something debatably unimportant, he'll agree with you until he's blue in the face out of respect. It's in private that he'll let you know how much of a hilarious dumbass you were back there, arguing with so and so about 'insert topic here' when he knew- and for that matter, he's pretty sure you knew too, that you were HEINOUSLY incorrect. It's a perk of being friends with him, but also? It's kinda... just really funny to him, and his sense of humour is catered ENTIRELY towards himself.
♡ Your interests are, to some extent, his interests by proxy. He expects pretty much the same in return where your friendship is concerned. If he hears you going on about something you're pretty interested/invested in, he's gonna put in a bit of effort to learn about it so he can hold good conversations and support the things you like. That said, again, he's gonna expect the same outta you, and a lot of his hobbies are fairly active. If you can't participate, that's fine, but showing a bit of interest goes a long way. He likes reading and cooking, too, so listen to him word vomit over books he likes and be a guinea pig when he wants to try this daring new recipe he found somewhere online. If you can participate in his active hobbies? He's dragging you along when he decides to hit the slopes and go skiing- if you've never done it before, even better, because he'll get a laugh out of you fighting for your life on the bunny hill.
♡ Otto makes some decent money, and has spending money to throw around thanks to his decorated career. Because of that, and the fact that he likes to treat himself to nice things and fancy places when he feels the vibe for it, if you're cash poor and he wants to do something with you, he's gonna pay for you. He's gonna crack jokes about it, not unkindly, but he is a bit of a shithead when he's properly comfortable with someone- and as his best friend, he is very comfortable with you. So don't worry, Daddy Warbucks has you when your wallet doesn't. Time to get culturally enriched, 'cause he wants to check out a museum or attend a concert. No, he's not gonna let you feel guilty about it, because he really enjoys taking care of the people he values when he gets the chance. You can cover lunch or something next time he feels like a day out, or something.
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courtana · 1 year ago
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Long post about the non-con/rape fic author who harassed me by directly sending me a non-con fic. Scroll past if you are not interested.
Trigger Warning: mentions of rape, pedophilia, and stalking
I'm going to continue addressing the bullshit claims that @ns-imagines keeps on spewing after harassing me in my DMs for simply disliking their approach to romanticizing abusive behaviors and sexual assault in fanfiction. Because they continue to twist the story, and now they are @-ing tumblr users who simply said they were sorry this was happening to me. They're misinterpreting my blog and what happened two days ago when they first slid into my DMs and began this fiasco.
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first, the post is totally still up on my blog. you probably cannot find it because either i blocked you or because you're an expert at lying and playing the victim. you can find it here: https://cssndra-cain.tumblr.com/post/723586418512920576/or-yall-could-just-be-fucking-normal-for-once.
Your @ was also never, ever once in the post. I did not even tag cod or Nikto. You are pulling this out of your ass to try to make me look bad and to justify sending me a non-con fic as harassment. It's not working. Even if I did name you, it does not justify doing what you did to me.
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first, you're a dumbass if you think i wasn't going to see what the image you posted was about. i was confused what that picture was even pointing to, and went to your blog to see why you sent me that image. when i saw it was a non-con fic that you had directed me towards, that's when i got physically sick to my stomach and realized it was not just a funny little meme. it was you taunting me with something you know i clearly don't like and that most people would find triggering. it's why people warn each other when they see a movie or tv show that has rape, because most people—even if they haven't been raped—feel awful watching it.
i did not post my life-story on tumblr either or any of my experiences with sexual abuse because it's private. not that you would've cared anyway, because you clearly don't now. either way, sexual abuse and violence is so prevalent that most women have experienced it either way. to send a non-con fic to taunt someone, without it even crossing your mind that 'maybe a not so nice past is the reason why someone has said they don't like non-con & rape fics' shows you're not that intelligent. if i say, i don't like non-con, it's probably because i have a reason to. not just because i'm petty and dislike things for no reason.
either way, you had no reason to taunt me in my DMs either way. you could have messaged me saying, "hey, you used a screenshot of my introduction character post, and it hurt my feelings even if i wasn't your intention. do you mind taking it down? i'm still new on tumblr." and i would've been okay with doing that and apologized. hell, in this very response, i say that although i never once tagged you or included your username, i will admit that maybe using a screenshot was not the best idea. for that i will genuinely apologize. but your reaction thereafter was totally uncalled for and worse than just using a screenshot of one sentence of your post.
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i did reblog a post about how people with violent kinks on tumblr need to be looked at closely because they're often proshippers who encourage rape and pedophilia. but i did not include your username. i just said something in the tags along the lines of 'last time i did this i had some freak come into my DMs' but i did not mention you by name.
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I did post the screenshot of the conversation. You did not just send the meme. You sent me a whole pile of invalidating, insensitive, and idiotic nonsense.
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I mentioned you in the post so people know exactly who I am talking about and what you did. You find joy privately harassing people in their DMs, but once your horrible actions see the public limelight, you feel shameful. That's your problem, not mine. I think it's fair that people in fandom spaces know when someone is engaging in harassment and using non-con/rape material as a way of taunting people, so that they can stay the fuck away from toxic folks.
Lastly, my blog does not complain about NSFW content. I do read smut, when it's consensual and well-written. What I don't like is when the smut portrays rape and abuse (like possessive behaviors and stalking, something you actually portrayed as positive in Nikto post), and other things that impressionable, young people in our fandom should not think is normal in a relationship. I do have the NSFW filter turned on, and i have non-con and dub-con in my filtered tags. But it's almost like this content is so pervasive in our fandom, that it escapes those filters anyway.
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Again, genius, the problem was not that it was NSFW. You're such a master manipulator with words. Very common tactics in gaslighters. My problem was that 1) your character introduction post was glorifying stalking and possessive behavior in relationships and 2) you sent me a non-con fic in my DMs in order to further taunt me instead of simply asking me to not engage with your writing. I don't know how else to spell this out to you. You will continue believing in your own narrative, because it's very obvious you're the type of immature, narcissistic person to put down everyone around you instead of simply owning up to one flaw you committed.
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Follow your own advice, babe. Read that bolded part again, slowly and to yourself, one more time. Slide into my DMs to harass me, and of course I'm gonna fight back.
Also, I never once sent you death threats. And I don't know of anybody you've listed sending you any. Post the screenshots, and I'll make sure to address that. As much as I find you disgusting and annoying, I don't condone death threats and threats of violence, even if you don't have any problem being an absolute pest in people's DMs.
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flrtwoo · 3 years ago
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wc: 1.3k
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as changmin neared the locker room, he heard a bunch of shouts and hoots coming from inside. soon after, a crowd of highschool kids started making their way out of the room, buzzing with energy and excitement. siyeon, who was in the crowd, spotted him and ran towards her favorite uncle.
"uncle changmin!" she shouted, earning a jolt from the clueless guy. when he saw siyeon coming his way, he smiled so wide and opened his arms for her. she jumped into the hug, laughing in happiness.
"that's a lie, you now have all the time in the world to do mom's errands WHICH you can't run away from anymore!"
"okay... maybe but don't think that i'm not dragging you with me to do them!"
you watched changmin and siyeon interact so animatedly from the entrance of the locker room, and you couldn't help but fall even further for the guy who's already stolen your heart. his smile could literally light up the whole world, you truly believed that.
"so i lost to dimples? huh."
"so i lost to dimples? huh."
you turned to meet the owner of the voice. "younghoon i still don't know how to respond to your comments, i love you but also are we really okay?"
your best friend laughed as he slung an arm around your shoulders. "YES we're okaaay it's just funny to see your reactions whenever i make comments about my crush on you!"
"you're sick, you know that? sick in the motherfriking head." you poked his head, younghoon continuing to laugh. "i know, i know."
from his peripheral vision, he saw changmin waving siyeon goodbye and walking towards you. with that, younghoon made it his cue to leave.
"looks like lover boy is coming right this way, so don't feel pressured to come to the lunch! i'll take care of the kids for now, you enjoooy your time." he teased and winked at you. you pretended to gag, mouthing a "what the fuck?" to him as he shrugged and left your side.
once you faced forward, you were met with a very nervous-looking changmin. "congrats y/n! you're the last person i needed to congratulate, i already spoke with younghoon but yea." he said.
"thanks changmin." you gave him a soft smile. he looked extremely anxious and you didn't know what was going through his head, so the both of you just kind of stood there in an awkward silence.
as you were about to end the conversation because where tf was this going to go, changmin cleared his throat. "i know your busy with the team, but can we talk? there's something i actually need to say to you."
"oh, sure! we can talk outside, at least it doesn't smell like chlorine and sweat out there." you commented, trying to lighten the mood. however, changmin didn't respond and just made a beeline towards the entrance of the arena.
you were confused, a little scared even. "what if he didn't want to be friends anymore? what if he was moving away to someplace far? what if he's not actually human? what if-"
"y/n, don't worry! it's nothing of that sort." he chuckled. "holy shit i thought out loud." your face grew beet red, and you stuttered out an apology for how he shouldn't have heard your thoughts.
you two eventually made it outside after an excruciating minute of you fanning the red out of your face and him trying to hold in his laughter at your embarrassment. you found a bench and sat on it, gesturing for him to follow.
as he sat down, he rubbed his hands against his pants, wiping off the nervous sweat that had formed. "okay, y/n i'll need you to listen to me carefully. let me know your thoughts after, alright?" he asked as he turned to face you.
"will do changmin!" you turned to face him too and flashed him an encouraging smile.
changmin was nervous in front of you, but the warmth you exuded from your smile alone was enough to give him the confidence to just think fuck it and tell you what he's been meaning to tell you for a while now.
"y/n the way we met, it was so, how do i put this... out of the blue? i mean, who expects to be punched during work duty and be pushed into the pool for literally standing there?"
you laughed at this, recalling the memory of how messed up your first and second meetings were.
"okay, i admit the second time was partly my fault, but still! it's crazy to tell people 'yea i met them in a haunted house where i was the scarer they punched'! but honestly, it's a much more interesting story than all the other 'how did you meet?' stories out there."
you nodded in agreement.
"when i met you the third time, you as siyeon's coach and me as her uncle, not gonna lie i wasn't the happiest about that. i'm sure you knew that too. but we kept meeting and meeting again under the most unexpected circumstances, and eventually i just thought 'maybe they're meant to be in my life, one way or another.'"
"we started talking more and hanging out, and soon i started looking forward to every time we talked and, well, hung out. i mean, you made even the boring things seem fun! that time i was studying for that dance theory test? all you did was ask the dumbest questions and i was already on the floor laughing my ass off!"
you wanted to protest about how your questions were NOT dumb, but changmin stopped you.
"i'm sorry, yes your questions were not dumb, i was just kidding." he patted your head, smiling affectionately at you. you rolled your eyes, however a smile similar to his soon made its way to your face too.
seeing you look at him with so much love in your eyes made something in his mind click and suddenly, his thoughts have never been clearer.
his heart's never been happier.
he didn't just like you. you meant so much more to him, and he knew you needed to know.
"what i'm trying to say is: home is somewhere i feel happy in, where i feel comforted, where i feel loved. and if being with you makes me feel those things, then y/n you are my home. and i hope you feel the same way, because i love you."
changmin exhaled as if he was holding his breath the entire time. he looked at you expectantly, waiting for your answer.
you, on the other hand, was shocked. just plain shocked, and you didn't know what to do, how to react, or what to even say.
the guy who'd stolen your heart had just admitted that you've stolen his heart too, so how the fuck do you respond to that.
after you had stayed silent for 13, 14, 15 seconds (yes, changmin was counting), he lost all hope. sighing, he looked down at his hands. "i'm sorry for putting this all on you, i knew it was a stupid idea, i'm sorry-"
you cupped changmin's cheeks to stop him from talking. he looked up, meeting your glassy eyes. you slowly neared his face until you were inches apart, and whispered your reply.
"i love you too, dumbass."
you closed the distance, lips meeting his as you kissed him slowly, sweetly. he smiled into the kiss, holding you as if you could disappear between his fingers.
it was a very romantic moment that unfortunately didn't last very long, because shortly after a bird landed on changmin's head causing him to scream, you to scream, and the bird to go number 2 on his head.
but oh well, everything about your relationship was so out of the blue anyways, right?
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out of the blue | jcm
[chapter 19]
previous | masterlist | next
summary: when you find out that one of the students you coach is the niece of the guy you accidentally punched in the face and pushed into a pool, you're not surprised that he's, well, disappointed at the outcome. however, you're determined to make amends with him for the sake of his niece... and maybe for the sake of his cute face too.
taglist: @s0ngk4ng @wooyoung-a @skiez @kittkyu @stealanity @sofie296 @ccobbiee @deputyjuyeon @enhacolor @simplewonderland @jaerisdiction @arepabella @snuhee @loonathewurld @loki-in-hogwarts @hidejeon @jakesahi @nyujjan @suzy-rainbow @w8nuzone @yeletbz @seungcheoluwu
can't tag: @yannew @deobib
(reply to this post or send an ask/message if u wanna be part of the taglist! :>)
a/n: I'M SO SORRY FOR THE LATE UPDATE i had to finish writing this piece but 🥲 last update on wednesday AAAA i hope you guys liked this chapter though, i didn't expect to go past 1k but i think i got carried away? 😃 it's not super edited too, so i'm really sorry if there are any mistakes!! please send me a message or tell me thru the ask box if there are hehe THANK UU <3
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floating-mid-air · 4 years ago
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The Princess Of All Saiyans
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Masterlist
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Hey guys! Chapter nine is here. And this one is a fun one. As always, I hope you enjoy. And if you have any comments or questions regarding this fic, feel free to let me know.
Also if you've been following this story for a while, then you'd know how inconsistent I am when I post chapters of this story. Sometimes it takes me two weeks to write another chapter, and other times it takes me an entire month. So if you're interested in being notified whenever I post a new chapter, you can join my tag list here.
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Chapter 9
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Vegeta and Raditz land simultaneously, both Saiyans carefully observing their surroundings. All of the Dragon Balls have remained in place, but that provides very little relief. There isn't a trace of your presence, not a footprint, not even a stray hair. "Y/N!" Raditz shouts at the top of his lungs. This was a severe mistake on his part. For his own sake, Raditz better hope the Ginyu force hasn't heard all of his commotion.
Vegeta paces back and forth, his hands knotted through his hair. "Relax, Vegeta. She couldn't have gotten far." Despite Raditz's calm words, his tone gives him away completely. It wouldn't take a genius to figure out that he's just as anxious as Vegeta. 
Raditz's advice doesn't seem to calm down the prince even a little. In fact, he only seems to grow more distraught. "Raditz, you don't understand. I never disclosed the location of the Dragon Balls to her."
Raditz furrows his brows at the smaller Saiyan. "What the hell, Vegeta!" Never in his wildest dreams did Raditz ever imagine himself shouting at the prince. He didn't even notice that Gohan and Krillin had joined them. Hopefully, they've picked up bits and pieces of the conversation because neither Saiyan has the patience to deal with their idiocy at the moment. "Just--- What the fuck were you thinking?" Raditz doesn't understand. How can Vegeta go from ordering someone to stay glued to your side at all times to leaving you to fend for yourself on a foreign planet? It's only been a few weeks. How can he have gone through such a drastic change in such a short amount of time?
"If I knew the Ginyu Force was coming, do you think I would've left her alone!" Their bickering is doing nothing to help. In fact, it's probably making the situation worse.
"Alright. How about you both calm down." Krillin decides to jump in and play peacemaker. "Y/N seems more than capable of taking care of herself. We need to focus on the threat. We need to get this over with and summon the dragon before something bad happens."
Both Saiyans turn to the smaller earthling, glaring daggers at him. "Who gives a damn about immortality right now! You don't know the first thing about my sister! So don't stand there all high and mighty and act like you do." Krillin hit a nerve, but it wasn't just in Vegeta. 
The earthling wants to revive his friends, but there is something he doesn't understand about Raditz. You've been the faint speck of light in his otherwise shitty world, the only friend the Saiyan has ever had. Even though he stood with his brother, you're still a priority over the resurrection of a handful of puny earthlings. 
"Interesting to see where your priorities lie, Geta!" Your legs have been sticking out of your handcrafted shelter the entire time. It's funny to see what details people miss while they're in a state of panic. You lean forward, revealing yourself to the abnormal group. Now your entire body hangs off the mountain.
Four sets of eyes look up at you, all with varying responses present on their features. "Oh, thank god," Vegeta whispers, at an octave low enough only for him to hear. Raditz places a hand on his chest, sighing in relief as Vegeta's features contort in displeasure. "What did I tell you about pulling shit like this? Get your ass down here!"
You jump down, landing in front of the Dragon Balls. This ensures that you maintain a safe distance away from your brother just in case he decides to kill you. "Don't get your panties in a twist."
Vegeta's nostrils flare, complemented with his entire body shaking with rage. "You scared me half to death." You expected a lecture, but he's not even raising his voice. You may have freaked him out more than you originally intended.
Your lips curve upwards. "That sounds like a you problem, big brother." Something is particularly satisfying about throwing his own words in his face.
"I suppose I deserved that." His features soften. "I'm just relieved that you're alright."
Raditz walks over to you, slinging an arm around your shoulders. "Well, what did I do to deserve that scare?" 
"Collateral damage Raditz. Call it a happy accident."
"Enough of the chit-chat. Now let's---" Vegeta cuts himself off as you all lookup. You can sense the Ginyu Force, and they're heading straight for you. You grab Raditz, pulling him into the homemade cave. The others were facing the Dragon Balls. There would've been no time for them to get up here as well. Your higher altitude could be used to your advantage since you'll have the element of surprise. 
It's a bit cramped, but when you created the cave. You never expected to share the space with a Saiyan of Raditz's size. He takes up more space than you and Vegeta combined. You both watch the Ginyu Force land in front of a trembling Gohan, a frozen Krillin, and an aloof Vegeta. You really hope the Genius Force doesn't do those god-awful poses. You've already been traumatized enough for the week.
You decide to keep a close eye on Captain Ginyu, who is currently exchanging pleasantries with your brother. Well, as pleasant as it can get for two beings who are about to murder each other in cold blood. Followed by murmurings from various members of the Ginyu Force and Recoome's delayed laughter. "Just hand over the Dragon Balls, Vegeta. No need to make this any harder than it has to be." Vegeta's posture remains stiff. It's clear your brother isn't going to budge. Their little group is going to have to pry that orb from his dead body. "Come on, Vegeta, be a sport. We already have five." He gestures to the spheres behind him. That means Frieza will have five. Can you really trust those neanderthals to hold onto their Dragon Balls? No, you were raised to trust no one's capabilities but your own, not even Vegeta's. 
Jeice looks around, his green eyes scanning around the area. "Where's that gorgeous sister of yours, Vegeta?"
Vegeta glares at the red man. "Even if my sister was here. I doubt she'd be interested, Jeice. I mean, she never has been." Oh, your brother knows all about your history with the mutant Brench-seijin. He's overly flirty, and you reject him. It was a vicious never-ending cycle. If Vegeta had no self-control, he would've murdered him years ago for even looking in your direction. In his eyes, Jeice is unworthy of a woman of your status.
"Well, with Raditz out of the picture, there's no chance for Saiyan offspring. So I figured I'd shoot my shot." You cringe. You're not sure which idea is more repulsive, a relationship with Jeice or procreating with Raditz.
"Even if you were the last man in the universe. My sister wouldn't so much as glance in your direction." Vegeta and Jeice continue going back and forth as an idea pops in your head. This may be your only opportunity to get your hands on a Dragon Ball. You're only chance to put a fork in Frieza's plans for immortality. 
You silently climb out of the cave, dropping to the ground. The others can unmistakably see you, but they make no expressions alerting the Ginyu Force of your presence. You grab the closest orb before promptly flying back to the cave. Call this your insurance policy for when Krillin and Vegeta ultimately screw up. You escaped that entirely undetected. Is the term elite just thrown around loosely in the Frieza Force? Because that's what you're starting to think.
You hand the Dragon Ball to Raditz, directing your gaze back outside. "Those scouters of yours can't detect Dragon Balls, can they?" It was a rhetorical question. Vegeta knows they don't have that type of technology yet. You know how your brother thinks, and this is a faulty plan on his part. "Then you lose!" Vegeta pivots, launching the ball at an alarming speed. It would be a fatal blow to the head if it hit someone. 
Burter takes off, chasing after the orb. He flips in the air, catching the ball with ease. You swear, Vegeta can be such a dumbass sometimes. He knows Burter rivals you in speed. He may even be a bit faster than you.  
You shake your head, turning to Raditz, lowering your voice to a whisper. "Here's the plan. When I formulate a distraction, you're going to take the Dragon Ball and get the hell out of here. And Raditz, go hide the damn thing, somewhere no one will find it." He grins from ear to ear, causing you to glare at him. You know how this moron thinks by now. "And do not hide it with that Earth woman. That will just get her killed."
"What if that's my intention?"
"I don't think little brother Kakarot would be very pleased with you, but it's your call." You stand in silence for a moment, your piercing gaze lingering on the Saiyan. "Though, I can assure you. If Frieza gets his hands on that Dragon Ball. I'll kill you. In the most graphic and painful way, I can imagine." He gulps nervously, rapidly shaking his head in understanding. To Raditz, you're the only life form that can still sound menacing while whispering. 
You revert your vision back to the little gathering outside. And as you assumed, Krillin lost his Dragon Ball as well. Ginyu decides to take Vegeta for himself, which doesn't go over well with his team. They're acting like a bunch of children. It's almost comical. "Fine." The Captain sighs. "I'll take the Dragon Balls back to Lord Frieza. You all can sort this out amongst yourselves." They chant Ginyu's name a few times. They kinda remind you of a cult.
The four lower members of the Ginyu force move to stand in a circle. "So the winner gets Vegeta. And for second place---" Guldo is cut off by Recoome.
"The rest. Make the two runts a set. Together they'll be more equal to Vegeta." Oh, that can't be going over well with your brother. The fact that Recoome would declare that those two are his equals must be sending his blood pressure through the roof. 
They begin playing rock paper scissors. This must be how they decide their battles. It's like a game to them. Every single match ends in a draw. At this rate, you could be stuck up here forever. 
You doze off until you hear Recoome cheering. The endless match must have finally ceased. "Ya! I get Vegeta!" Fate can be an amusing thing sometimes. Vegeta must be ecstatic, getting to show the moron just how much stronger he is than those pathetic runts. 
"Of course, I'm stuck with the runts." Guldo wines. He's the last creature who should be referring to anyone as a runt. You could squash that little freak like a bug.
Ginyu approaches the Dragon Balls, picking them up with his telekinesis. He counts them before snapping his head toward the dumbest member of the Ginyu Force. "Recoome! There's only four here!"
Recoome scratches the back of his neck, that classic confused look on his face. "I'm sorry, Captain Ginyu. I thought I counted five."
Jeice turns to his superior. "I told you we shouldn't have trusted him with counting the Dragon Balls."
The Captain takes a deep breath, attempting to keep his composure. "It doesn't matter. I'll search for the missing Dragon Ball. It's probably with Y/N anyway." He takes off, heading in the direction of Frieza's ship. Well, that takes out your major concern. The others are child's play compared to Ginyu.
You pay minimum attention to Guldo's battle with Krillin and Gohan. You're more focused on finding an opening for a distraction. You begin to notice significant holes in their fight. Guldo will be in one area and then magically appear in another, and he's not teleporting. If he was, you would've been able to track his movements. Could the rumors about that green freak be true? Can he really pause time? They must be. That's the only feasible explanation. So under the assumption that Guldo can stop time, the earthlings don't even stand a chance. No matter what they do, that four-eyed freak will always remain one step ahead of them. 
You do, however, pick up on something. Guldo appears to hold his breath before every skip in time. That must be a limitation in his abilities to pause time. So if those two can somehow prevent him from holding his breath, they should be able to best him. You know what, scratch that. Those two probably haven't picked up on his abnormal behaviors.
Though, the earthlings do appear to have the advantage at the moment. And the rest of the Ginyu Force won't let Guldo forget it. They're heckling him so loud that you can hear them clearly from all the way up here. Guldo's kinda like the Raditz of the group, just a lot less respected. 
Guldo tosses the pair up into the air as a strange yellow light surrounds them. He's claiming it's a paralysis attack. That doesn't sound good for the earthlings. 
Krillin and Gohan struggle almost as if they were trapped in invisible bindings. As far as you can tell, they're immobile. If Guldo felt the need to resort to such dire tactics, he must think that he can't take out the pair any other way. So when the earthling and the half-breed combine their strength, they're mightier than Guldo. That's quite impressive considering how weak they were back on Earth.
"Now I'm gonna show you what happens when you embarrass me in front of the boys." You clench your fists, your nails digging into your palms, as you watch Guldo intently. As much as you hate to admit it, you're going to need those two runts. So if Guldo were to kill them, it would be very unfavorable. He uses another mind trick to pull a tree from the ground, using the bottom end as a makeshift spear. He points the weapon at the pair, taunting them. He's gonna impale them with a fucking stick. What a pathetic way to go.
You do wonder why Vegeta hasn't intervened yet. He's never played by their rules before. So what's stopping him now? Your brother may simply believe that Gohan and Krillin deserve to die. For not adhering to his warning regarding the weakest link of the Ginyu Force. It's not below Vegeta to be that petty. You can't blame him though, those two fools have no sense of self-control.
The slimy green creature's obnoxious cackling invades your ears. Honestly, Guldo's just pissing you off more than he was before.
Amidst the chaos, you jump out of the cave, flying a bit to distance yourself from suspicion. You shoot a purple beam at Guldo, efficiently decapitating him. Raditz seems to have gotten the message since he checked out with the Dragon Ball sometime during the commotion. He better hide that thing somewhere safe because his life depends on it.
"Did you really think I'd let a creature as pathetic as Guldo kill anything with a drop of Saiyan blood!" Your voice booms causing all eyes to land on you. You place a hand on your chest, fixating your gaze on the Ginyu Force. "I'm hurt that you didn't include me in your little game."
"Oh, our apologies Y/N." Jeice's thick accent invades your ears. "We should have assumed. Wherever Vegeta is, you're always somewhere nearby."
You swear you can hear faint grumbling. You just can't quite locate the source. Your eyes scan over the ground until you discover the origin of the sound. Long story short, it was Guldo's severed head. So his species can survive decapitation, good to know. "Defeated by a damn Saiyan. And the weaker one at that." You could run circles around that little freak. If you went head to head, he wouldn't even be considered a challenge. Guldo's giving himself far too much credit.
Vegeta chuckles darkly. "Well, don't worry." He strides over to the talking head. "You won't have to deal with that shame for long." Vegeta finishes the job, eliminating that embarrassment of the group of supposed elite warriors. 
The three remaining members complain about Guldo's demise, but it's not for the reason you may think. They're more upset about the impact his absence will have on their ridiculous pose. You wish you could say you were surprised, but you've known those idiots far too long to believe anything else.
The half-breed and earthling walk over to you, identical expressions of gratitude apparent on their faces. "We owe you one, Y/N." You roll your eyes at Krillin. It was a simple business decision. And it was nothing more than that. 
Gohan nods in agreement. "Ya, thanks." You cringe at his gratitude. Why are they thanking you? You killed Guldo for your own selfish reasons.
"Your lives had nothing to do with it." Well, at least Krillin's. If Guldo did kill the half-breed, it would've been an embarrassment to your entire race in hell. "I needed a distraction. I saw an opportunity."
"She's right, so pull yourselves together. Your lives are incredibly insignificant to us." Vegeta's lying. Your brother knows you need them. He's just far too prideful to admit it.
Burter turns to Jeice, morphing his hands to prepare for another excruciating match of rock paper scissors. "Alright, Jeice. Winner gets the Princess, and the loser gets stuck with the two runts."
Jeice shakes his head. "No, Y/N's all yours." He turns to you, his green eyes meeting your own. "I could never lay a hand on a lady as fine as the Princess." You suppress a gag, deciding to keep your mouth shut. If you were to respond, there's a good chance you could end up fighting both of them.
Burter furrows his brows at his comrade. "Are you sure?"
"Ya, go crazy, Burter." It's actually a reasonable match-up. You and Burter both have incredible speed. I guess you'll finally find out who's faster.
Now with Guldo out of the picture, it's Recoome's turn to fight Vegeta. He reminds you a bit of Nappa. Since he lacks any form of self-control. His punches at your brother are erratic. He even almost hits you, Krillin, and Gohan several times. If Recoome were to hit Krillin with that kind of force, there's no doubt in your mind that it would be a fatal blow.
"Don't go killin them all yourself!" Jeice is second in command to Ginyu, so his authority over Recoome makes sense. "I get the two runts, and Burter get's the Princess of the monkeys." One minute Jeice is flirting with you. The next, he's demeaning you. Talk about mixed signals.
You watch Recoome and Vegeta trade punches, and it's starting to lack any value of entertainment. Vegeta's covered in blood while Recoome's armor is chipped, and he's now missing tufts of hair.
You begin to grow impatient. This will be the first time you've been challenged in a while. "Yo, Burter! Let's just get this over with now. We'll make this battle a double feature." 
"Fine with me." The two of you distance yourselves from Recoome and Vegeta, commencing your battle as well.
Their gazes flicker back and forth between both battles. They were so enthralled in the action that neither Gohan nor Krillin noticed that Raditz had joined them. 
Gohan and Krillin stick to the sidelines. They're in no hurry to fight Jeice. Even though he's significantly smaller than Recoome and Burter, Krillin doesn't think Jeice's smaller size will give them any sort of advantage. 
"Raditz?" Jeice looks far from pleased. He's always been jealous of the Saiyan. Not for his strength, rather the envy stems from Raditz's luscious mane of hair. It took Jeice several years to grow his hair to an adequate length, while that fool was born with that full head of hair. Raditz meets his gaze, an arrogant smirk overtaking his features. As he waves at the green-eyed man mockingly. "But--- Y/N said you ran off!"
Mid-battle, you turn to Jeice. Without even looking, you still manage to keep up with Burter. "I'm a compulsive liar, Jeice! It's a nasty habit."
Jeice huffs, crossing his arms at the largest Saiyan. "Raditz is mine. I'm throwing him in with the two runts." A chuckle escapes your lips. He's underestimating what the three of them could accomplish together. Jeice is letting his own petty feelings cloud his judgment. How arrogant.
Krillin's brows furrow as his eyes linger on you. There's something that isn't quite adding up. He turns to Raditz and Gohan, lowering his voice to a whisper. "Hey, guys. I've been thinking about something. Remember back on Earth how Vegeta said that Saiyans get stronger after battle. Well, Vegeta's gotten stronger after several fights, but do you see Y/N? She's still able to effortlessly keep up. Even though she's barely lifted a finger. How is that possible?" The earthling's eyes widen as the gears begin to shift in his head. "Unless. Is she stronger---"
Raditz's hand covers Krillin's mouth, lowering his voice to a deadly whisper. "Silence, you earthling. Keep that big mouth of yours shut."
Krillin's teeth sink into his captor's hand, successfully freeing himself from the Saiyan's clutches. Several muffled phrases of obscenity escape Raditz's lips as he rapidly shakes his hand in an attempt to soothe the pain. "She is. Isn't she?" The look on Raditz's face told Krillin all he needed to know. "But you knew that already, and I bet you know why too. I wonder how Vegeta would feel about this?" His last sentence was clearly a passive-aggressive threat toward both you and Raditz. The earthling wouldn't be dumb enough to follow through with that threat, would he?
Raditz scowls at Krillin. How dare this pathetic little weasel attempt to threaten him. "Not a word to Vegeta. If you value your life. I'd stop talking now. Vegeta doesn't know, and it would be very unfavorable if he found out, for all of us." His tone shifts, his eyes flashing with vulnerability. "Something bad happened to us as children, and Vegeta still doesn't know about it." He returns to his menacing demeanor, your shared childhood trauma getting pushed to the back of his mind becoming yet again a distant memory. "So you will stop your absurd thoughts now. Or I can assure you. The second you resurrect your feeble friends, I will single-handedly slaughter them, and then you will follow." Krillin gulps, nodding in fear. He better pray Vegeta heard none of their conversations because he has a feeling Raditz will stick to his word.
Raditz thinks he knows all your secrets, but he's only aware of the tip of the iceberg. Below the surface lies pain and suffering the older Saiyan could never imagine from you. You keep these secrets to protect him, to protect Vegeta, and most importantly, to protect yourself. But if either of them were to find out the truth, your life as you know it would come crashing down. If they were to find out your greatest shame, your pride would be in shambles, and they would know the truth. You're just a weak Saiyan who's an embarrassment to her family name.
You're not exactly sure how much time has passed. You've completely blocked out the entirety of your surroundings, remaining focused on your battle with Burter. You can't joke around as you did back on Earth. There's no room for error today.
The two of you take turns beating the absolute hell out of each other. If you keep this up, there will be no end to this anytime soon. You shriek, spiking up your energy substantially. Burter's eyes bug out as his scouter explodes. Those pieces of junk are really no match to this energy-sensing technique. 
Even though you've blocked out your surroundings, you know the two of you have moved a significant distance away from the others. You could even be on the other side of the planet by now. In the back of your mind, you can't help but worry about your brother especially, now that you're so far away. Recoome may be an idiot, but he's a strong one. You have to remain focused. You can't help Vegeta if you don't help yourself first.
You begin to get the edge over Burter. Now he's attempting to block your attacks, but due to his large size, he's failing horribly. A couple more blows, and you'll finally be able to knock him down. You've taken down guys much larger than Burter, creatures who were triple his size. 
Over the years, you've learned to use your smaller size to your advantage. Making your opponent's sheer size more of a nuisance than a strength. Burter begins to struggle further. He's now barely able to keep up with you. "I'm the fastest being in the universe! How can one of you monkeys be faster than me?" You scowl at him, finding no humor in his statement as rage boils inside of you. 
Unknown to you, you and Burter aren't alone. Goku has been watching your battle in awe for quite some time now. He knows he should've left to find the others, but he just couldn't help it. He can't take his eyes off of you. This is the first time he's seen you fight, and you're much stronger than the Earthbound Saiyan believed.
Your fists clench as your entire body convulses in rage. It's not often you'll lose your temper like this. Goku swears that he saw your irises flash a shade of red. He rubs his eyes, glancing back at you. Your eyes have returned to normal. Maybe Goku is just seeing things. If you knew someone was watching, you would've kept your temper in check. 
Burter sends a blast of your energy your way. Which you dodge by teleporting behind him. You use all of your body weight to knock him down to the ground. You won't mock him like you typically do after defeating a foe. You won't take the chance of giving him an opening to strike back. In the palm of your hand, you create an orb of energy, disintegrating his head. Successfully, taking out your second member of the great Ginyu Force.
You fall to your knees, desperately gasping for air, before grabbing your side, wincing in excruciating pain. Damn, Burter must have nicked you good. You look to your side, noticing just how much blood has leaked through your armor. This is gonna be an issue, though you've fought through worse. You stand back up to check your body for any further damage. There seems to be no other physical damage to your form. Your armor is a bit ripped, though. 
"Wow! You're really strong." You gasp, moving your fist, aiming it at whoever is in front of you. They swiftly catch your fist, preventing you from attacking. Their grip is secure enough to stop you from escaping, yet at the same time pleasantly gentle.
You move your gaze upwards, finally gathering the courage to look them in the eye. Your brows furrow as Goku's dumb face enters your field of vision. "God, Kakarot! When the hell did you get here?" You shake yourself out of his grasp, taking a few steps back, putting some distance between you two.
"A while ago." He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. "I got distracted by your fight." So he was observing you the whole time. Why does that make you feel incredibly self-conscious?
"Of course you did." You sigh, moving several strands of hair out of your face. Goku steps closer to you, bringing his hand to meet your forehead. It's so big that it takes up the entirety of your forehead and even the top of your head. "Kakarot. What the hell are you doing?"
"Just be quiet for a second." It's official. Goku has lost what was left of his mind. "So it is true. You guys are working together. And that Frieza guy is a much bigger deal than I thought." How does he know about all of that? And why is he still touching you?
You slap his arm, convincing him to remove his hand. "And why's that?"
"Because you're afraid of him."
Your face flushes. "I'm not scared of Frieza. I'm not afraid of anything." Your cross your arm, averting his gaze.
"Yes, you are." He pouts. "I saw it." Kakarot saw it? How the hell--- Did Kakarot acquire the ability to read thoughts? Is that even possible?
You decide to divert his mind from his accusations. Knowing Kakaort, that shouldn't be hard at all. "Since when can you read minds?"
He rubs his chin, lost deep in thought. "I don't know--- I just had a feeling."
"Well, let's go. And new rule." You bring your hand up, pointing your index finger at the buffoon. "Stay out of my thoughts!"
He holds up his hands in surrender, nodding. "Are we gonna go find that Captain Ginyu guy?"
"No. We have to go make sure that Recoome and Jeice haven't killed the others first. Don't bite off more than you can chew." Goku has this aura around him. You can tell he's gotten stronger. He just needs to learn how to get his priorities in order.
Okay. All you have to do is pin down someone's energy. There are at least four sources to choose from, so this should be fairly simple. You shut your eyes. This should help you concentrate adequately. 
"Ohh, what's that?"
Your head snaps toward Goku. "What?" You swear the man has an attention span equivalent of an insect.
He bends down, observing the ground intently. "It's like a green string."
"A green--- Kakarot! Don't!" But you were too late. He's already yanked the tripwire.
The ground concaves beneath you, causing you to lose your footing as the two of you fall down into the pit. You fall on top of Goku. Unintentionally straddling the Saiyan. And if you thought this situation couldn't get any more awkward, you'd be wrong. Goku's arms are wrapped securely around your waist, holding you in place. Your heart feels like it's beating out of your chest. And your face feels like it's been set aflame. As your eyes lock, your face only turns a deeper shade of crimson. "D-Don't touch me!" You're stuttering. What the hell is happening to you?
His brows furrow. "You're the one who fell on top of me!"
"It's not my fault." His classic pout spreads across his lips. "How was I supposed to know that the ground would collapse?" 
"W-Well, you're the reason we're in this mess!" You stand up, wanting to get as far away from Goku as possible. You don't like the way you feel around him. The only time your pulse should be racing like this is during combat.
"Well, it wouldn't be called a trap if you could see it!"
"I don't get why you're so mad. Can't we just fly out?"
You snicker as your lips curve upward. "Give it a shot, Kakarot." You know it won't work, but at least his failures will provide you with some quality entertainment. It would be a pretty pathetic trap if you could simply fly out. Goku flies up, slamming his head on the invisible barrier. You break out into a fit of laughter as he falls back down. Goku jumps back up, rubbing the back of his head. "Ouch. Did you know that would happen?" Your giggling dies down as Goku begins looking around the hole. "How did this place even get here? Is this Frieza's work?"
"No. It's definitely the work of the Namekians. Frieza wouldn't be able to formulate something so elaborate in the amount of time he's had. Besides that dictator never does any of his own dirty work."
"Well, let's just sit back and relax. I'm sure we'll be fine. Someone will have to find us eventually." He has such a laid-back attitude. Maybe another alien baby crash-landed on Earth. Because with every second that passes, you're finding it harder to believe that Goku has Saiyan ancestry. 
"Oh, ya, let's just relax." You mock him. "While the others are probably getting chopped up into little pieces by the remnants of the Ginyu Force as we speak!"
"Why are you always so negative?" Is he serious? Do you have to spell out why this is potentially a very dire situation? You'd think he would show more concern for his son.
Your hands meet the sides of your head. You're practically yanking your hair out at this point. To say you're frustrated would be an understatement. "God, why am I constantly getting trapped in enclosed spaces with your idiotic bloodline! First, it was your spawn, then it was your moronic brother, and now I'm stuck with you. And you're somehow the worst of them all!" Goku just stands in front of you like a statue with that goofy smile plastered on his face. "And stop smiling when I yell at you!" 
Being stuck down here with Kakarot will be the ultimate test of your willpower----
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Will the others make it to Y/N and Goku in time? Or will Y/N kill Goku before they even get the chance? Find out in the next chapter of The Princess of All Saiyans!
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