#i missed night city so much actually i love just driving around here. vibing

[ruvviks]

CYBERPUNK 2077 ➤ [1/?]

[achaotichuman]

Day 3 of Thirty Days Of Tamcien! I apologise for the lateness of this one, I was busy second-guessing myself.

If you would like to join in on this little unofficial event, the prompts list is here!

This one was supposed to be mostly smut, but the vibes just WUHEH8F DID NOT WORK FOR ME

So it's mostly two sappy idiots. But I love that anyway!

Read on AO3 or below the cut!

It was laughable how it happened. 

Entirely like a cheesy movie, or one of those trashy romances Lucien liked to read from time to time. 

They’d been hanging out in Tamlin’s apartment, feeling the faint buzz of alcohol, the warmth under their skin. Laughing about something or other, neither really remembered, but that wasn’t entirely because of the alcohol, they never really remembered the details of their conversations. They hoped topics far too quickly for that. 

Some action movie was blaring on the tv, they didn’t really watch it, but it felt a little more like a movie night if a movie was actually on. 

Pizza boxes were scattered on the floor, while a bowl of half-eaten chips and popcorn sat forgotten on the coffee table, along with a litre bottle of soda. It was slowly getting later, the night seeping in, slowly the lights of the city glowed more intensely, until the dark view was scattered with amber lights. 

They had a good view of everything, Tamlin’s apartment was on the seventeenth floor. Most of the walls were windows, and he left the curtains open long into the night. 

Eventually, Lucien started yawning and rubbing his eyes. 

“I shall call a cab.” He said eventually, looking at the watch on his wrist, “I’m not fit to drive.”

“I can call one for you.” Tamlin offered. 

“Nah, I’ll just-”

At that exact moment, as if on cue, lightning crackled in the distance, lighting the entire sky a deep purple. Not even a second later, thunder boomed through the city. Lucien instinctively covered his ears, dropping his head down. He’d never been fond of storms. 

“Fuckin hell.” Tamlin leaned over and rubbed his friend’s back soothingly, “Wasn’t expecting a storm tonight.”

“Summer weather.” Lucien grumbled. 

Tamlin nodded, humming in agreement. He then hurried to close the windows and blinds, making for certain that everything was shut tightly. 

“Alright, all closed up,” Tamlin announced, he glanced back at Lucien, who had curled further up on the couch, looking around with a pinch of anxiety in his gaze that he was obviously trying to hide. 

“You don’t have to leave, stay in for the night.” Tamlin insisted. 

“Are you sure? I-” Thunder crackled again and Lucien took in a shaking breath, “I can still go-”

“No.” Tamlin said, and that was final. He walked back over to the white couch, flopping down onto the nest of pillows and blankets they had created, “You stay with me.”

“Fine.” Lucien conceded. His red hair spilled out over his shoulders as his head fell back onto the couch pillows. 

Tamlin moved around a bit, rearranging himself until his head was in Lucien’s lap, his legs kicked up over the otherside of the couch. 

Lucien scoffed a bit, but his slender fingers moved to twist in Tamlin’s hair, not pulling, but just… stroking. It felt nice, so Tamlin didn’t tell him to stop. 

But then thunder cracked again, louder this time, like they were stuck in an echo chamber. Lucien couldn’t hide it this time. The red head ducked his head down, the smallest of whimpers escaping his throat, even as he clamped his lips tightly together. Trying not to let his fear show. 

“Hey, hey,” Tamlin tried to comfort, sitting up and pulling Lucien into his arms, tangling them in the fluffy blankets. 

“Why is it so fucking loud?” Lucien grumbled as he buried his face in Tamlin’s shirt. 

The blond let out a soft laugh, stroking his friend’s hair lightly. The action movie continued to drone on in the background, but they had missed so much of it from talking, they couldn't go back to watching it if they tried. 

“I need a distraction,” Lucien said, wincing once more as thunder rolled through again. 

Tamlin hummed, he thought for a moment, glancing around his apartment. There wasn’t much to do, maybe put on a more exciting movie? Or just one they liked better-

The tv cut out, a black and white fuzz appearing as the lights began to flicker. All at once, they were plunged into darkness. Lucien’s hands suddenly fisted Tamlin’s hair tighter. 

“Power outage.” Tamlin said, quickly breaking the silence, he felt Lucien trembling under him, as the storm continued to rage. 

“Candles.” Tamlin said, standing up, and grabbing Lucien’s hand, “I've got some in the kitchen.”

Lucien released a shaking breath, “Alright.”

It didn’t take them long to light a few dozen tea lights. Lucien rummaged through all his lower cabinets for a while, and eventually managed to pull out a good five pillar candles. Entirely black and filled with red wax, he’d bought them during a halloween sale a few years back, and completely forgotten about them. 

A soft glow filled the apartment once candles were lit. The amber glow cast long shadows over the floors, flickering with the flame. Tamlin took Lucien back to the couch, he checked his phone, looking up the weather for the rest of the night. 

“The storm isn’t supposed to get any better, we may be out of power for a while.” Tamlin said. 

“Godfucking storm.” Lucien muttered, then said, “I’m glad that I’m with you, though.”

Tamlin blinked at him, feeling warmth colouring his face. Lucien quickly added, “I don’t think I’d like to be alone in the dark in my own apartment during this storm.”

Tamlin nodded, forcing a laugh as he said, “Yeah no, it wouldn’t be fun.”

“Yeah…” Lucien bit his lip as he sunk further into the couch. 

Thunder cracked again and Lucien sucked in a breath, the wind was howling. Forks of lightning filled the night sky, the electrical light flowing in through the cracks of the blinds. 

“Does-Does it feel like the building’s swaying to you?” Lucien whispered, in a shaking voice trying to prevent a sob from breaking out of his chest. 

“Hey,” Tamlin wrapped an arm around Lucien, “It’s alright, it’ll pass eventually.”

“Fuckin hell, I’m pathetic.” Lucien mumbled as he curled into Tamlin’s side.

“You’re not pathetic.” Tamlin wrapped his arm tighter around Lucien. Putting down his phone so he could situate himself better. 

The storm continued to roar outside, and as much as he tried to hide it, Lucien was terrified. This wasn’t going to work, but without the TV and really only their phones to entertain them, there wasn’t much to distract him with…

“I have an idea.” Tamlin said, pulling up from Lucien. 

Furrowing his brow, Lucien watched curiously as Tamlin pushed his coffee table out of the way. He pulled the blankets down to the floor and arranged them to his liking, before opening a drawer from the table beside the lounge, pulling out a small black box. Then he sat down and patted the spot across from him. 

Lucien slowly slipped down to the floor, sitting with his knees just a few inches away from Tamlin. 

“What are we doing?” Lucien asked. 

“We’re playing a game.” Tamlin said, then he set the box down between them. 

Lucien quirked an eyebrow, “Truth or dare?”

“Yep.” Tamlin stated.

“That’s a kids game.” Lucien pointed out. 

“It’s a distraction and it’s not a kids game,” Tamlin replied, already opening the box and putting the cards into two piles. One dare, the other truth. 

Lucien rolled his eyes, “Fine but I’m not doing this sober.”

Tamlin grinned, and moved to grab them a bottle of wine from the kitchen. 

Three bottles of shiraz later, they were both sprawled over the floor, the used cards pile somewhere on the coffee table, at this point they were more or less tossing them in the general direction of the table. 

“Truth.” Lucien decided on, grabbing the neck of the wine bottle and taking a long swallow. 

Tamlin sighed as he grabbed the card. 

“Your biggest regret,” Tamlin read. 

“None, I live without regrets.” 

“You’re not allowed to lie, Lucien.” Tamlin hummed. 

Lucien rolled his eyes, “This is boring.”

“The questions are boring.” Tamlin amended. 

“Alright then, hold on one second.” Lucien said, as he set down the bottle, Tamlin took the opportunity to grab it and take his own drink. Almost out. 

“Here.” Lucien announced, then he whistled, “Yep, this is a fun one.”

Tamlin raised an eyebrow, putting the bottle down before leaning back on his elbows, “If you say so.”

“Okay, truth or dare?”

He thought for a moment, then announced, “Dare.”

Lucien grinned, “Eat a spoonful of hot sauce and don’t have anything to drink for two minutes.”

“Fuck you.” Tamlin cursed, groaning as he sat up and headed for the question, Lucien laughing behind him. 

“I don’t even know if I have hot sauce.” Tamlin mumbled as he rummaged through his cabinets. 

“You do, I bought some the other day when I came over.”

“Stop bringing your own groceries to my apartment.” 

“No, because they come in handy. Like right now.” Lucien pointed out as he sat at the counter, watching Tamlin pull out the small bottle of sauce. 

He grabbed a spoon and poured the red liquid out, he glanced at Lucien who was grinning like an idiot as he gleefully watched him screw his nose up at it. 

“I hate you.” Tamlin said before quickly shoving the damned thing inside his mouth.

“You love me.” Lucien waved him off. 

“Nope, nope, nope, nope, NOPE, FUCK-” Tamlin yelled as his mouth burned. 

Lucien laughed and laughed as Tamlin instantly gave up and ran to his fridge to grab the carton of milk. 

“It’s not that bad. You’re fine.” Lucien said as he watched his friend. 

Tamlin rolled his eyes, “I hate you.”

They moved on to other truths and dares. The ones Lucien managed to find were definitely far more fun than the ones in the card games. Eventually they found themselves lying across the floor, whilst Lucien scrolled for more questions. 

“Alright, truth.” Tamlin said. 

“Hmm, oh.” 

Tamlin turned to see a faint blush across the bridge of Lucien’s nose, high up on his cheeks. Lucien turned to glance at Tamlin, narrowing his eyes as a snake-like smile curved on his lips.

“What?” Tamlin questioned. 

“I found a list of dirty questions.” Lucien grinned as he said it. 

Scoffing, Tamlin swatted at his face, “You’re a child, those truth questions are for teenagers.”

“So, you admit this is a game for children.”

“No-”

“Alright, truth, let me see…”

“Lucien, you’re not actually going to ask me-”

“Have you ever wanted to fuck a close friend?” Lucien’s smile only seemed to widen as he asked. 

Tamlin’s heart suddenly started racing. He stared at Lucien, his mouth opening and closing. 

“What?”

“It’s a truth.” Lucien shrugged, his hair moved with him. Crimson locks spilling across the blankets and pillows, framing around his shoulders and slender face. 

Dear God. 

“Yes.” Tamlin eventually said. 

Lucien’s eyes lit up, he immediately rolled onto his side, hovering over Tamlin, “Who?”

“Oh my God.”

“Oh, come on.”

“It’s your turn.” Tamlin reached over and snatched Lucien’s phone from his hand. 

“Hart?” Lucien asked. 

“Lets see…” Tamlin hummed as he scrolled through the numerous questions. 

“Bron? Oh, oh Andras?” 

“Truth or dare?”

“Come on Tam, tell me.” Lucen whined. 

“Truth or-”

“God, truth.” Lucien said, giving up as he flopped back down on the floor. 

“What’s your biggest fantasy?” Tamlin asked. 

“Oh my god.”

“I told you these were for teenagers.” Tamlin laughed. 

Lucien was quiet for a second, but eventually he said, “To have one night with this one guy I know.”

Tamlin furrowed his brow, then he laughed a bit as he said, “I’d hardly call that a fantasy.”

“No,” Lucien murmured softly, “No I’ve been fantasising about it for a while.”

“You have?” Tamlin whispered, rolling onto his side to face Lucien. The red head turned his face to look up at him. And God his gaze was so soft. 

“Yeah, I have.”

“Who?”

Lucien grinned that cocky, cocky, grin again, “Tell me who your friend crush is, and I’ll tell you mine.”

“Oh my god.” Tamlin’s heart was just about beating out of his chest. 

“Come on,” Lucien said, but his voice was lower. Still teasing, but… there was just something there. A slight, almost seductive tone, that made blood rush through Tamlin’s face. Filling him with heat. 

“I don’t know…” 

“A hint then.” Lucien suggested. 

With a sigh, Tamlin considered it for a moment. Looking into Lucien’s eyes, he knew the cunning fox wouldn’t be giving up on this any time soon, and if he was being entirely honest…

He really wanted to know who Lucien’s secret fantasy man was. 

“You know him.” Tamlin eventually said. 

“I do?”

“Yeah…”

“Like close friend well, or…”

Tamlin stared at him for a second, feeling like he was breathing too hard. Wondering if Lucien could hear his heartbeat racing in his chest. 

“You know him really well.” 

It just took those few words. Tamlin should have known it was a terribly obvious hint. It was also a childish hint, but his heart was going faster than his head could keep up with. Lucien’s eyes seemed to darken in the amber glow of the candles around him, his lips parted slightly, as his gaze flicked to Tamlin’s lips and back. 

That heat began to surge, crawling over his face, burning the tips of his ears. 

“You know,” Lucien murmured, “I think I know who he is.”

“Yeah,” Tamlin whispered, breathless. Entirely lost in the heat of that dark gaze. 

“Do you wanna know who mine is?” Lucien asked, his eyes flicking back to his lips. 

Fuck.

“Show me.” Tamlin dared to say. 

Lucien’s smile was so soft it nearly melted him. 

Pushing himself up onto his elbows, Lucien pressed a gentle, chaste kiss to Tamlin’s lips. All at once, he was caught up in a whirlwind of fire. Heat and heat and heat pressing into him on all sides. Tamlin lost himself. Forgot the storm outside, forgot the blankets underneath him, the walls surrounding him. In a single moment, he was in an endless world where only he and Lucien existed. 

Those blood-red, thick curls felt so soft, so nice, so right, in his fingers as Tamlin wrapped his arms around Lucien’s neck. He pulled slightly, and Lucien groaned against his mouth. A sudden, involuntary whine was ripped from Tamlin’s throat. It was high-pitched and entirely needy. He didn’t even know he could make a sound like that. 

It was all Lucien needed to push him down onto the covers. As he hit the floor behind him, Tamlin gasped, and Lucien took the opportunity to explore his mouth with his tongue. In a moment, the kiss was even hotter, the fire burned brighter, consuming them entirely as they gripped and groped each other. Lucien’s quick, graceful hands sliding up and down Tamlin’s skin, while Tamlin fisted his hands in the back of Lucien’s shirt, making haphazard attempts to practically rip it off him. 

Eventually, Lucien’s nimble fingers found the hem of Tamlin’s shirt, he pulled away, breaking the kiss for a moment, to pull Tamlin’s shirt up. 

Tamlin took the reigns, pulling it up and off, then grabbing at Luciens. 

They hardly spoke, just threw away all fabric that stopped them from getting at each other’s skin. Lucien surged forward, crashing their lips together, it hurt, but Tamlin didn’t fucking care anymore. He just wanted Lucien, wanted his skin, wanted his heat. He wanted to fucking burn. 

One of his hands, moved from running over Lucien’s back down and down, until he felt the tent in Lucien’s pants. He bit Lucien’s bottom lip, sucking it into his mouth as he started to palm his cock. 

“Fuck- Fuck, Tam.” Lucien moaned, jutting his hips into Tamlin’s palm. Breaking free of the kiss to trail his lips further down Tamlin’s neck. Tamlin’s head fell back as Lucien started sucking a bruise into his throat. 

“I’ve dreamt about this.” Lucien murmured against his skin. 

“I’m- holy fuck- I’m your biggest fantasy?” Tamlin managed to gasp out as Lucien’s hand sunk into his pants. 

“Fuck yes you are.” Lucien said, gripping the length of him, Tamlin moaned again, pulling at Lucien’s jeans, trying to get them off. 

“Impatient.” 

“I’ve waited this long, I don’t want to wait anymore.” Tamlin muttered, his eyes going just a bit wide when Lucien finally got his pants off. 

“Fuuck.” Tamlin whispered. 

Lucien grinned, pushing Tamlin down, twisting himself just a bit to let his muscles flex. 

“Cocky.” Tamlin noted, grabbing Lucien’s waist between his hands. 

“You love me.”

“I do.” Tamlin smiled, “I really do.”

Lucien’s grin faded into something softer, “I love you.”

It was romantic, it was so romantic it was cheesy. Just like those stupid trashy romance novels. 

But fuck it, Tamlin wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Dividers by @saradika

[pganotgolf]

Reflection of Happy Hour by Marlowe Granados ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This is like Broad City in a book.

It’s such a good slice of life of a 20something living(struggling) in the big city

If you’re looking for a plot this isn’t the book but what is so great about it is how Marlowe describes the things , like things that you’ve felt but never put words to it (see fav quotations section)

Notes I took down while reading

- It’s like stream of consciousness but witty and similar to mine and my friends (so maybe it’s just the brain of a 20 something)

- “I wonder what I’ve done in life to be subjected to Alice Langley (bankrolled by her mother) telling me to grow up. What hypocrisy.”(100)

- Broad City if one of the friends was a bitch ,

- Wait she’s turning around

- actually nope

- But the chapters with Coop were definitely white lotus vibes

- Favorite chapter: August 6 (moms, grief)

- she never says “I feel like…” it’s always matter of fact

- This book reminds me of the song Rave Angel by Blusher

- SPOILER! it would’ve gotten 5 stars if the ending wasn’t hinting at the book being her released diary🤦‍♀️

Here’s a list of my favorite quotations from the book:

- Being inside when it rains makes you forget that anything else could be happening (89)

- She pulled out a… burgundy velvet dress… Light disappeared into it; velvet has a way of doing that (92)

- “You need to grow and have some respect for yourself”. I hate lines like this. They’ve been abused so much they’ve lost their meaning. When you really think about it, they’re designed to cause the most hurt with the least effort. You Should Have Some More Respect for Yourself. (100)

- It’s a sad thing when people take beautiful old buildings and try to modernize it. Some things are meant to be restored, not re-interpreted (121)

- I want all the tenderness in the world. It’s a natural urge to want to be important in someone’s life. The soft underbelly of a course man. A preview is never enough because I am insatiable. (150)

- People forget I can be cruel too. I can devastate just about anyone.(152)

- (Fashion) is an important kind of knowledge that is overlooked. In many cases, it’s the first mode of expression women have access to. (168)

- I sat in the windowsill listening to the birds chirp and the occasional car drive by. It’s funny how seamlessly nights end and mornings begin, and yet they feel quite different. (182)

- … I am always interested in finding things. You can take a piece of junk and turn it into a talisman. You can assign it meaning and its own moment in time and store it in a box somewhere. I have an old champagne time filled with trinkets like that. I only ever open it when I’m feeling particularly blue. It’s just a case of remembering things. Sometimes when you’re set on forgetting, you have to know what direction to forget. (202)

- Sometimes I think I must be attached to reality by a thin string (202)

- Daylight crept through the windows, a reminder that things are always going on without you no matter what. Death is not unspeakable, but it often feels that way. (218)

- “ I know how hard it must have been to have me. I am the age she was when she became pregnant. Daughters make single mothers more vulnerable than lone women. Even when I was small I could sense that. My existence had put her in a precarious position where she was to protect both me and herself. (219-220)

- They look at me and say, “I don’t know how you do it.” I am not strong! I want to tell them. I am simply enduring. (222)

- It would be nice if whenever someone said, “I love you,” it meant, “Everything will be fine.” It’s all reassurance anyway. (222)

- Sometimes I wonder, if I ever went missing, how long it would take for someone to realize. Considering how long they are used to not hearing from me, I’d I were really in danger, I think it would take them about three weeks. (223)

- Anyone who prefers minimalism probably had everything growing up. When you are never left wanting, you never want much. (240)

- Love and not eating for sixteen hours feels more or less the same. (241)

- I decided to be honest (247)

- Sometimes making bad decisions really takes no time at all. In fact, you realize that you’ve been itching to do it all along. Deep down, I think comes from being so angry at having to restrict yourself all the time because in the end, no matter how well you behave someone always Dash away your life‘s work with little to no regard. We’re always swimming against the tide. How’s that for Justice? If I am reckless, it is because I am tired. (258)

- The bodegas have already brought out parts of mom’s in heartening colors. They clustered together in rich, fuchsia‘s oranges and reds a sign that summer is on its last breath, and these are the flowers that will guide us into fall (262)

[neoaevis]

“Our Little Adventure”

A/N: Hiiii Bbbys this is my first ever time to collab with @neosmutcollective​ for their ncssunnyside and aah everything in this fic is fluffy and that boyfriend lovely vibes sooo yeaa I hope you enjoy as much as I do 🎀

“NOT PROOFREAD”

Warnings: Pet Name(Princess), Smut, Semi-public sex(?), Tent Sex

Word Count: 2764

 Summary: It's finally summer break so your boyfriend planned for the two of you to have a staycation near the beach to get away from the city for a while, little did he know you prepared a suprise for him, you finally agree to give him your v card and with that your staycation will be one of the most special events in your relationship. 

The long-awaited summer break for all the students in campus is finally here, most importantly a most awaited one for you because your boyfriend told you that he plans to take you somewhere special to get away from the city for a while.“Y/N, so where is this special place Jaemin is planning to take you” your friend Winter asks as she packs her things from her locker, you peek at her locker and sighed at her question because honestly you don’t know where Jaemin is planning to take you as he said he wants it to be a surprise.“Actually he wouldn’t tell me he said it’s a surprise” her mouth had a ��O” shape when you told her about it, and it made her look at you for a glimpse second.“Do you plan loosing it this summer?” Winter asks you but you seem to not understand her question so you furrow you eyebrows, as you do so she finishes up her last item to pack and then turns around to look at you “You’re v-card” it was now your turn for you’re mouth to turn into a “O” as you think about what she just said.“Well I don’t know I feel really scared” you admit to her because truth be told you’ve always opened up to her how you and Jaemin would always try to start making out but it would never go beyond that though Jaemin is not forcing you with anything you feel his bulge every time beneath your core and wanting to go further but is too scared to do so, that’s why it always just end there “I want to give it to him but I lack the balls to do so” you tell her as you fidget with your hands.“Y/N, it’s Jaemin don’t worry ok, you’ve been inseparable ever since we were kids and I know you trust each other, so I think it will be well if it leads further to that but still don’t force yourself if you don’t like” she tells you caressing your shoulders to comfort you, but she then remembers something as she then searches in her bag, as she found it she released a relieved sigh before handing it to you, you looked at it carefully and as you looked at it further it was a condom, you were about to ask her why she has a unused box of condom but the very man itself you were talking about suddenly begins calling your name from the halls so you quickly hide the box in your bag.“Y/N, Y/N” he called as he run towards you hugging you from the back “I missed you” he exclaims and just then he notices Winter so he greets him too “Hey there Winter” Winter gave him a smile back and said “Hey there too Jaemin” as she checks her locker for one last time to make sure she did not leave anything.“You guys better enjoy your trip” she said as she was finally done with her arrangements “We will” Jaemin said while still hugging you from the back, Winter was about to move a step forward when you grab her arm “Yes Y/N?” she ask in an angelic tone playing innocent about what she just gave you.“You will have to explain to me about that” she furrows her brows to act confuse and instead of answering you she just pats you in the shoulder and winked as she finally made her way out of your bubble.“Is something wrong” Jaemin ask as he spins you around to pin you over the locker on your back, you look him in the eye as you push him away from you “No PDA right Jaem” you pick your things up so you can finally leave school to go home “You seem suspicious” Jaemin says as you both begin walking.“Nothing is wrong Jaemin, Winter just broke one of our secret pacts that’s all” you opted to lie to him as you can’t tell him the real truth why you are all fuzzy, he grabs your arms to look at you “Are you sure” he asks to check if you are lying, you look him in the eye and told him “Yes, Jaem that’s all” he gave you a smile as he grabs the things you are holding for him to hold it instead.You and Jaemin head towards his car to drive to the secret destination Jaemin planned, what’s sad about this trip though is that it’s only going to be a staycation because your parents will be back two days from now and unfortunately you and Jaemin still haven’t really told them about your relationship nor your trip because your parents are on the stricter side.Jaemin opens the door for you and once you were set he quickly went inside, he immediately looked at you with a big smile and asked “Are you excited princess?” he caressed your face with his thumb as you lean your face towards his touch “More than excited” you cited while thinking about your plan for him too, the drive was filled with wonder as Jaemin made you laugh and secured at the same time he was the best boyfriend and best friend you could ever wish for.“We are here” Jaemin announced to wake you up from your mini slumber because the drive was so long, you gave her a grin like smile as you stretch your arms doing so Jaemin quickly heads out the car to open your door for you to help you out, he also pulled out a blind fold which makes you knit your brows “Trust me I have a surprise you will like” and with his words you agree to be led blindfolded to the magical place he prepared.He walked you with outmost care and patience guiding you properly so you won’t fall, with one last step he pulls the blindfold open for you to see the most romantic surprise ever, he prepared a dinner near the beach with a tent set up near it “I know it’s not much but I hope you like it” Jaemin tells you while scratching the back of his head “What do you mean not much Jaem this is too wondeful and no words can describe how happy I am” your words filled his face with a colorful smile instead of worry that once filled him “I’m glad you like it” you turn to him to kiss him passionately to thank him, when he breaks the kiss he led you to the dinner table.The dishes he prepare were both of you’re favorites that’s why you can’t help but appreciate him more, “Jaemin how could you prepare this wonderful thing oh my god” you moaned as you munch on your food “Well of course anything for you, did you know I even woke up early to prepare this” he bragged even though truth be told he hired someone to set the table up and ordered some of the dishes from a restaurant he enjoys but though he actually cooked two of the dishes you have right now but nevertheless he is glad that you are enjoying.The dinner was absolutely amazing and as you finished both you and Jaemin decided to take a stroll in the fresh air to digest also to be able to star gaze, you both held hands never letting go of each other while smiling like fools each time, this is how you feel when you’re madly in love Jaemin thought as he can’t help but admire every little thing about you.The sky was getting darker making it a signal for the both of you that it’s fairly late so you decided to go back and head to the tent but you can help but stop at the entrance of the tent “Are we sleeping in one tent?” you ask him feeling the heat creep up your cheeks “Oh I just brought one but I’ll just sleep in the car” he said as he was about to grab his pillows but before doing so you tug at his shirt “N-no stay sleep here with me” you tell him with a bit more confidence.With that here you are both now widely awake next to each other, Jaemin joked to break the tension that was clearly visible as this was the first time you are sleeping beside Jaemin for the whole night, not that you two are a innocent little couple it’s just you still feel shy all the time.The night went on and so did Jaemin’s jokes he made you laugh too much that your stomach aches already, but as time pass it’s as if slumber was taking a toll on him so he joked less and was already shutting his eyes, silence filled the room then but as it did you remember your plan that you have forgotten, one side of you tells you to just drop it but one side of you tells you to not that’s why you choose the latter and grew the balls to do the act “Are you sleeping Jaem?” you turn to him as you plop one elbow to look at him, he opens his eyes to smile at you and asked “Something wrong princess” you trace his nose down to his lips which makes him giggle as you stopped in his mouth he kissed it which makes you giggle, you stopped and looked at Jaemin seriously this time before you suddenly kissed him passionately, with your kiss for Jaemin his once drowsiness was now gone as he kept wanting more as the kiss grows more passionate.✄Somehow all the kissing has brought you sitting down in Jaemin’s body to be connected to each other more, you were both severely making out teeth clashing, heavy breathes and moans filling the room, you also feel his growing bulge underneath you that’s why Jaemin begins to slow down but you were not planning to so you begin grinding you’re hips to feel him and for him to feel you so he suddenly breaks the kiss and held you in place “Y/N stop that, if you continue that I might not be able to control myself and take advantage” he said as he pants catching his breath “Then don’t , don’t control yourself” you said as you pushed him down for him to lie down as you re-start grinding at his crotch, Jaemin was in awe with your statement even wanting to stop you but pleasure was over taking him more and more that’s why instead of breaking free he grabs you to make him be on top of you, now it was you’re turn to be in awe to see this side of Jaemin, he begins by kissing you from you’re forehead , nose then stopping by your lips to kiss you deep, slowly he is down your neck savoring each area until he sucked that sweet spot earing a moan from you, he made a pattern he would suck, lick and kiss and his pattern made you feel so restless due to your aching need down there that’s why you tug at his shirt for him to pull it off to which he gladly did, when he removed his shirt you can’t help but admire his finely toned body so your hands went traced his chest, abs until your down to the place that covers his manhood “Y/N he moans” you quickly stopped  what you were doing to strip yourself off your dress leaving you with only your under garments, your bra and panty were a matching pink with bows that really depicts your style, cute and feminine.Jaemin quickly kissed your shoulders slowly and sensually while his hand is pulling down the straps of your bra and the other hand finding the hook to unclasp it, once he unclasped it you suddenly feel the cold and begin to feel shy you quickly covered yourself but Jaemin removes your hands “It’s alright princess ok” he tells you so you quickly remove your hands from your breast for him to finally see it, he looks at you in the eye before he gives his full attention towards your breasts while circling your cloth clit, you couldn’t help but arch your back with the too much pleasure you are having, once Jaemin decided he had enough with your breasts he pulls you panty seductively after he saw your pussy he quickly dived in licking it which makes you shiver, he begins eating you out slowly while he pups one finger inside you, you begin tugging at his hair and slowly his pace was too slow for you that’s why you ask him to go faster “Jae-Jaemin oh holy I- I want you more” he stops what he was doing to look at you “How do you want me more?” he asks which makes you go insane “I want, want you to eat me faster” you said as you finally let go of your shyness, he does what you said he indeed fasten his pace, he ate you with much vigor and began pushing two finger inside you which you did not expect, it felt like the best thing ever that’s why soon you were cumming all over him.You were a huge mess, shivering but as you do Jaemin begins undressing himself further by removing his pants and boxers to finally free his fully erect cock that leaks with pre-cum, he pumps it a few times before opening  your legs and gliding inside smoothly, the stretch hurt it was nothing like how his fingers stretched you but as soon as he was in you remembered something “Jaemin baby wait condom” you shouted and he cursed under his breath that he forgot about that one “I-I don’t have one he says” you point your bag at him “I-I have in my bag the bigger zipped part” you said which makes him shocked for a bit that you are prepared about this and that you did not make him stop midway, he pulled out for a while and began searching your bag, you moved your head away from him closing your eyes a bit to re think what you are currently doing and just then he arrives with wiggly hands, he unboxes the condom and removes it’s foil then gently sliding it in his cock.He slides inside you once again as you feel the stretch once more but this time deeper, he stops to let you adjust “Tell me when you’re ready” he tells you while holding himself back “I’m ready you tell him” Jaemin went really slow to not hurt you and it honestly still hurt and it was visible in your face that’s why to distract you he kisses you lovingly and begins whispering sweet words, once the hurt turned into pleasure you made him go faster, he went in a fast pace so fast that your tits were bouncing and all there is in your mind was how good he feels inside you that’s why soon after you began seeing stars and painted his cock with white, he let you recover from your high before he began ramming into you again but this time in a new position, you legs we in his shoulder, that position made him reach places you never knew he could that’s why for the third time that night you clench around him “A-are you going to cum again baby?” he asks as he begin to rub your clit to stimulate you more of your release “Oh-oh fuck Jaemin y-yes” you said stuttering, the place was filled with heavy moans “Cum with me baby” he says as you both came together.✄Jaemin stayed inside you for a while until he finally soften and opted to lie down beside you “T-that was amazing” you say looking at him which made the both of you laughed “Y’know you beat me into it, I was actually planning something about it” you tear your gaze away from him as you feel shy “I-I actually thought this was the right time” you said stumbling with you words which made Jaemin smile widly “Oh and well you have to explain to me why you have a condom in your bag” he grins at you as you open your mouth to find the proper word to explain, but before you could Jaemin captured you in a kiss that’s ever so sweet.

[shingia]

DATING SUNA...

in honor of this smexy middle blocker’s birthday, here are MANY hcs about what i think dating suna would be like (as exhaustively as possible) bcs he’s on my mind 25/8 <3

cw : one or two suggestive stuff, mentions of food

— EARLY RELATIONSHIP

• ok so suna would definitely not waste his time dating someone if he wasn’t truly in love

• that’s why it took him a few months to ask you out because 1. he wanted to be sure of his feelings 2. he wanted to be sure of yours 3. he was scared

• he probably acted detached at first, but it was just to compensate for the fact that you had him wrapped around your finger since day 1

• he probably didn’t officially tell his friends that you were dating and just casually kissed you before for his class (lowkey enjoyed leaving without a word while everyone else was freaking out)

• nicknames came after a few weeks, when he ‘accidentally’ called you babe after asking for a kiss. yeah he is that smooth

• because it took him so many months to ask you out, you already knew each other pretty well so he felt comfortable around you very quickly

• and he tried his best to make you feel the same if you were a bit more nervous

• honestly he couldn’t wait for you two to become closer over time <3 he's a sucker for the boyfriend/bestfriend dynamic

— LOVE LANGUAGE

->| QUALITY TIME

• he cherishes every single moment you spend together, even if it’s just for a few minutes between classes

• sure, there are times where you two just hang out at his place or yours, scrolling on your phones and enjoying each other’s company. but tell him once that you want to talk to him about something and you’ll have his undivided attention

• and lemme just kdjqdhvjdmsjvh real quick : eye contact. that’s how you know he’s listening, and he always leans in just enough for you to know that he’s paying attention. no phone in sight, just you.

• he doesn’t need to take you out on fancy dates for it to be called quality time, because he values impromptu face-to-face late night conversations much more than a dinner at the restaurant.

— DATES

• your first date was one of the only dates you spent outside, it was nothing extravagant you just went for coffee after school and ended up walking through the city, holding hands for the first time

• once you guys started officially dating, you realized that at-home dates were actually more your thing. but there needs to be a difference with the rest of the time you spend at home, so you always have one or two things planned like :

• cook together an elaborate meal for once, actually put an effort in the choice of the movie/tv show you’re gonna watch (and not end up watching rick and morty for the 23rd time this week), try the most questionable face masks recipes - he loves them and doesn’t even deny it

• but i feel like you guys might go out for your anniversaries, and it’s a great opportunity for him to take really nice pictures of you and update his phone’s lockscreen (he’s a huge simp)

• your dates often take place in the evening because he loves to see your face illuminated by the city lights, and he likes to know that you might get cold because he can be smooth af and give you his jacket (most of the pictures are taken when you’re wearing it)

• i think official and ‘elaborated’ dates with suna maybe occur every two weeks because he wants them to be special and likes to look forward to them

— CUDDLES

• he gets a kick out of kissing your whole face except your lips, but really he’s just waiting for you to get frustrated and kiss him yourself

• however, if you ever don’t play along he’ll stop like “wtf you’re not supposed to do nothing”

• he’ll give you lazy and passive cuddles where you just lay on top of him, hugging him while he watches something on tv or on his phone, BUT

• if he ever wraps a blanket around you then real cuddles begin. i’m talking scalp massages, back strokes, kisses, playing with your hands...

• i just know his kisses are aphrodisiac, there’s something about the way he holds your head still with his hands that’s just UGHHH

• you could be sharing a perfectly peaceful moment together and he’ll suddenly get bored and feel an urge to tickle your sides, squish your cheeks or randomly blow in your face/ear

• but god forbid you ever do that to him, he will crush you with all his weight until you can’t move

• he also uses your hand to scratch his back because he can’t do it without writhing like a cat, not that you’d complain about seeing that one day

• you two always end up dozing and losing track of time. “we stayed like that for NINETY MINUTES?” (he’d have to find an excuse for being late at practice, because there’s no way in hell he will tell the truth in front of the twins)

• it’s very likely that you guys wake up still cuddling after nine hours of sleep. i mean it’s canon that he has a good shoulder mobility so he can keep holding you even if you’ve moved in your sleep

• his biggest struggle is morning cuddles because it’s really hard for him to get out of bed and go on with his day when he’s so comfortable in bed with you

— PDA

• i think he’d adapt to your needs, he doesn’t really mind pda

• if he ever pulls you in for a hug in public, it won’t always be a soft and sweet hug, no. sometimes it might look like a literal headlock, but he’ll give you a quick peck on the head to make up for it

• in fact the only times his hugs are sweet and lovey in public are after his matches

• if atsumu ever makes fun of him for ‘being a softie’, he’ll do the exact opposite of what’s expected of him : and by that i mean ruthlessly tongue-kiss you until tsumu begs him to stop

• he uses hugs as a way to talk shit to you about someone without them realizing it

• he doesn’t necessarily hold your hand all the time but he has affectionate gestures like giving you little pats on the head or wiping dirt off of your clothes

• pokes your cheek for no reason, and that’s daily

• he’s also a fricken tease and doesn’t have any problem with gripping your thigh when you’re sat at a table :)

— COUPLE DYNAMIC

• he tries so hard to act like you’re the clingy one but everyone knows it’s a lie

• he probably has a private story called ‘being held against my will’ where it’s just him roasting you on a daily basis

• which is a great contrast with all the albums full of pictures of you in his camera roll. like i said, he’s a MAJOR SIMP

• you also have a private story called ‘exposing the truth’ and it’s filled with stolen clichés of him being a needy and whiny little bïtch (sorry i got carried away) : it’s the twins’ main source of blackmail

• i said before that suna’s a sucker for the boyfriend/bestfriend dynamic. yeah well you guys definitely have it - you can spend entire afternoons together without once acting like a couple

• he’d give you a kidney if you ever needed one, but steal one of his fries and he’ll flip your chair over without thinking twice

•  you both think that your failed attempts at being romantic are hilarious. one time he tried to kiss you under the rain but you were so cold that you couldn’t stop your teeth from chattering and yeah it was just terrible

• the efforts you put in to embarrass each other are remarkable. you once kissed him in a supermarket and he just pulled away, yelling “MOM AND DAD SAID NOT IN PUBLIC !”

— RANDOM HCS THAT GIVE ME LIFE

• remember when i said you guys would do face masks together ? yeah well suna doesn’t own any headband which means that you have to tie his hair up in two pigtails at the front (it’s too short for one ponytail or a bun hehe)

• he has a silent laugh, the kind of laugh where he just wheezes while slapping his thighs, and he has to make a conscious effort to catch his breath

• he tugs on your sleeve whenever he wants to show you something <3

• in winter he writes messages on the frost of your car’s windows. nothing cheesy, probably something along the lines of “nice ass”

• he thinks it’s hilarious that your contact name in his phone is your full name, no emojis, nothing. he even put caps at the beginning 

• he sends you 30 tiktoks per day and expects you to answer to all of them

• he makes you playlists for the dumbest things. one of them is called ‘dentist appointment vibes’

• he likes to see you wear many layers of clothing in winter because he takes great pride in being the only one to know what’s hiding under them *wink*

• when he’s driving, he often tries to be smooth and stare at you lovingly when he’s at a red light, but he always misses the moment when it turns green and the other drivers start to furiously honk at him (another failed attempt at being romantic)

• i’m gonna be honest w/ you : he’s probably effortlessly seggsy when he drives

in conclusion : you might not be the most romantic couple, but your vibes are 𝑖𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑐𝑢𝑙𝑎𝑡𝑒 because you’re both so madly in love with each other

pspsps: here’s a link to my suna playlist that fuels my mind with thousands of scenarios 

[eloves-writes]

a pause in reality

[spencer reid x reader]

summary : you and spencer finish work late, admit your feelings & spend the night lying on your apartment floor talking

a/n : this is an extension of this fic that people seemed to like! enjoy, it’s 12:11am + i’m tired, mwah <3

couple : spencer reid x reader

content warnings : none

———————————

it had been a couple weeks since spencer came over to your apartment in the middle of the night, and you hadn’t spoken to him much since. he had taken a week off work for ‘personal reasons’ and then you’d been completely overloaded with work after that so there hadn’t been much room for conversation. the lack of conversation had provided much opportunity for simply observing the doctor’s existence; you liked watching him work. it wasn’t in a weird way, and not in a sexual way; there was just something about how he quickly flipped pages of case files and twirled his pen around his fingers as he thought what to write that was quite encapsulating. you thought he was quite beautiful in the most winsome way, like he wasn’t outwardly trying to impress you but everything he did still made you bite your lip and smile. 

despite your admiration, you missed the usual tidbits of conversation that came with sitting on the desk opposite spencer and being his best friend; the random ‘fun fact!’s and ‘did you know?’s that hadn’t been so common since you’d spent the night together. well. not spent the night together spent the night together, but you fell asleep cuddled up on your couch and didn’t move until the morning. it wasn’t exactly awkward, but you’d both felt a heavying shift in the usual romantic tension that circled you. the intimacy that came with falling asleep on each other didn’t help the feelings you were both trying to keep bottled up for the sake of your jobs, but at the end of the day that job was behavioural profiling so it was pretty clear you felt the same way, and you had for a long time.

“hey y/n,” prentiss said, perching on the edge of your desk. it had been yet another late night at the office, the hour hand of the clock was just shy of 10pm.

“hey you,” you replied. “i’ve still got another case report to finish, i won’t be long.”

“you are the wooorst,” she moaned dramatically. “i can’t wait to be out of here, we spent far too much time in this office.”

you smiled at her and rolled your eyes. “i’ll ask garcia if she can drive me home, em. i don’t want to hold you up any longer.”

“ok, sure, thanks. have a good weekend y/n, reid.” she gave you a quick hug and waved as she left the office. emily usually drove you to and from work, partly because you didn’t like driving for an hour at 8am in the morning, but mostly because you always brought her coffee and she loved you for it. spencer looked over the divider between your desks and cleared his throat.

“you, um, need a lift home?”

“yeah, why?” you replied without thinking as you tried to speed-write the last few lines of your report.

“i thought maybe i could drive you, it’s late and i, um, wouldn’t want garcia to go out of the way when we live on the same road. it’s not a problem, i’d actually like to- i mean-”

you chuckled under your breath. your eyes met and he let out a nervous giggle.

“you can drive me home, spencer. thank you.”

his voice raised a couple octaves. “ok.”

you chuckled again and closed the tab you were looking at on your computer before grabbing your bag and coat. he followed suit, throwing his satchel on his shoulder and fiddling with the strap as he waited for you to gather the last of your things.

“ready?” he asked, biting back an excited-nervous smile.

“yeah, i just need to give this to hotch,” you motioned to the case file you were holding, “i’ll meet you in the elevator.”

spencer mumbled an understanding and you went your separate ways before meeting up again in the elevator. it was only a few minutes, but the tension was ever-thickening and you were glad to get out on the ground floor. you figured it would be a miracle if you made it all the way home without jumping on him. you didn’t.

“you know what hotch said to me when i left,” you began as you walked to his car. the silence had become unbearably uncomfortable. “he asked if we were going on a date.”

spencer looked up, wide-eyed and blushing. he fumbled with his keys and unlocked his car. “that’s, haha, that’s funny.”

you were much used to the reality-based teasing from the team.

“yeah, you know hotch. always a joker,” you replied light-heartedly. you both climbed into the car, spencer in the driver’s seat for once. he turned towards you, and in a fraction of a moment, he moved in to kiss you. it wasn’t a conscious decision, it wasn't a choice- it was a reflex. in that fraction of a moment, spencer reid felt an all-compelling yet natural urge to lean over and kiss you.

“woah,” you pulled away before he could reach you. “were you about to kiss me?”

he sat back in his seat and scratched his neck awkwardly. you suddenly regretted saying anything at all. “sorry, i shouldn’t have … let’s just go-”

“no, it’s ok,” you laughed. “continue.”

“oh, ok.”

your lips finally met, and it felt like the stars aligning. all the months of tension, the sneaking glances, the late night spying, they’d all added up to this kiss in the front seat of spencer’s car in the quantico parking lot. and this was what you’d been chasing, this was the pause of reality you could only match to the quietest and earliest hours of the morning. you placed your hands on his face as you broke the kiss, his own hands still firmly holding your head and pushing your hair out of your face. the two of you froze like that, simply absorbing the moment and framing it in your minds in case you didn’t get this luxury again.

a distant car horn disturbed your focus, and spencer finally started to drive you home. he was a good driver, if one could drive gently he certainly did. it wasn’t like being in a car with morgan, when you had to hold on for dear life and prey he wouldn’t crash- he never did, but derek’s disregard for road safety was a little concerning. in a total contrast, spencer obeyed absolutely any and every traffic law.

“you know you drive like a grandma, spence?” you joked, letting your inner thoughts out of your head.

“hmm, what did you say?”

“nothing,” you chuckled to yourself. “do you think we could grab some takeout on the way home?”

he smiled. “sure. by home do you, um, mean your apartment? you want me to come to your apartment?”

you nodded and leaned over to kiss him again. you were so done pretending you didn’t like him; you’d wasted enough time dancing around your feelings for him, you didn’t want to waste anymore. he felt the exact same- he’d never really experienced love before but he was pretty sure this was as close as he could get to a soulmate. a twin flame. there was an unspoken understanding between you, you just got each other in a way no one else did. which was also an advantage when you asked to get takeout on the way home and spencer automatically pulled up to your shared favourite chinese restaurant without having to ask.

within an hour, you were both sat on the floor of your apartment eating noodles and discussing whatever topics came to mind. first it was work, then literature, then music, and now you’d settled on a much more mature topic of office gossip. the time had slipped away as you spent the evening together, the clock ticking far past midnight as you talked. your biggest living room window was wide open to let in the night breeze and city ambience, much like it had been the last time spencer had been in your apartment, except this time there wasn’t the pestering weight of feelings on your shoulder. everything felt shiny and new, that familiar late-night vibe recast with fresher feelings of domesticity. you fixed your gaze onto the young doctor as he tucked a pillow under his head to lay on the floor, studying every line of his frame as he stretched his arms. you had always thought him quite spindly, but you could see his lower stomach where his shirt had ridden up and it was quite defined.

“are you checking me out, y/l/n?”

“maybe,” you replied breezily, shuffling across to lay your head on top of him. he brought an arm down from behind his head and wrapped it around you. it felt like there was the world outside, and then you and spencer. it didn’t feel like everything else had stopped, it just felt like right there in your apartment you were detached from it all. it was you and spencer, and that was completely ok. he cleared his throat and began to talk; he was reading from memory a book you’d told him months ago was one of your favourites. you smiled to yourself like an idiot, glad he couldn’t see your face. all your life, you had craved the exact feeling you felt in that moment- an escape from reality the way a gas station was a break from a long road trip. you felt loved, and most of all you felt ready to fall asleep and wake up well-rested for knowing your heart was at peace with your mind for the first time.

[itsbeenahellofayear]

what we got, it don't come easy

Summary: Some things are easy, some things aren't. It can take time to learn what is important.

Warnings: Smut. Maybe not as much as you'd expect from a story thats pretty much only about sex. Some feelings. Language.

Author's Note: It took a while to get this one across the line. The first segment has been written for weeks, but I lacked inspiration, motivation, and was a little burnt out on anything Leaf related for a little bit there. RIP 2021 season....

Thanks to all of you who kept checking in and were enthusiastic about the little snippet I posted. Kind of kicked my writing into gear today!

I crave your feedback - this is weird and disjointed and very personal in a lot of ways, so I'd love to hear what you think!

---

Sex with Auston is easy - that's never been the issue between you.

This thing started with sex - you connected on tinder, got to talking for a couple of days, then went out for drinks.... That wound up with him in your bed, having arguably the best sex of your life.

That first night, lying hot and sweaty and completely satiated, you'd be lying if the thought didn't cross your mind that you could do this for the rest of your life.

It was that good.

-

You don't keep a list of things to try, but you kind of keep a list of things to try.

-

Some things that make the sex with Auston so good:

He's the first guy to encourage you to use your vibrator on your clit while he's fucking you - it's not every single time - sometimes coordination isn't possible when he's fucking into you so good but those times when he's pressing deep into you, hands on your breasts, grip firm just the way you like, and you've just got your vibe pressed to your clit on a low setting and you just shake apart.... Those are good times.

His dick is huge. Like he's big to start, but then he grows. It honestly took a bit of work to find angles that didn't have him ramming your cervix each time, but once you did... He fills you up so good.

He loves to eat you out. You've had your fair share of mediocre oral, but there's something about the way he just goes for it, lets you twist your fingers in his too long hair, makes these little noises into you, that just really does it for you. He'll open you up with his thumbs and just dive his tongue deep inside of you, then move up and basically caress your clit with his tongue. If you're honest you can't even fathom what he's actually doing, it just feels insane.

He lets you ride his face. Now, it's not an every time thing, mostly because if you're going to expend energy on riding him, really what you want is his cock buried inside your aching slit. But sometimes, he'll settle himself on the bed, and you'll just climb on top of him, grip the headboard, and just ride.

-

You might love him.

(Maybe that's why it's good)

-

So the sex has never been the problem.

The problem lies in the in between bits.

In the moments when you're feeling insecure about his fame, and his looks, and the company he keeps. You're not a party girl - you'll go out to the bar once in a while, but people, everywhere, is not really your scene. You know he likes to go out, especially after wins. You know he likes to drink. And sure, sometimes he'll text you, and he'll end up at your place late at night. But sometimes he won't. And so you wonder.

It's also the moments where he just shuts down, internalizes, and won't communicate. You're not one for talking about your feelings, but you do believe in communicating when it's about things that affect someone else! Case in point: you send him a message in the morning on what you know is his off day - he doesn't even read it let alone respond until 8pm. You had asked him if he wanted to meet up for afternoon drinks.

It's also the moments when he says stupid immature shit, when you realize that, no matter how great a family he comes from, he's still a rich, entitled man-child that doesn't really understand the value of a dollar. And that irks you.

A lot.

-

But.

You're just fooling around - keeping it casual.

But.

-

He takes you out to the cottage with some of his boys. The season ended in heartbreak, they're splitting up for the summer, they want to blow off some steam.

You spend the days lazing by the lake, lying in hammocks in the yard, sneaking off for a "picnic" in the woods. And by picnic you mean Auston laid you out on a blanket and ate you out until you couldn't take it.

You spend the nights getting high sitting out by the fire, leaving unsubtly to go back inside to fuck.

It's probably around day 3 when you realize you're legitimately, 100% in love with this guy.

Day 5 you head back to the city, and haven't really talked to him about how you feel.

He leaves for Arizona the next morning.

-

He's not your boyfriend.

He doesn't know you fell for him.

-

The first night you had sex with him – the first night of the rest of your life – you remember thinking you've never felt this full.

Now, months later, you feel like you're empty.

Anytime you think of him, it's like your pussy just clenches involuntarily around what it thinks should be there, inside of you.

You want him so badly, so deeply, and you don't even have a real claim to him because you couldn't open up and tell him that something had changed.

You catch yourself scrolling insta late at night, looking to see if he's posted something that might hint he's out with someone else.

You hate that you're like this.

-

(You never see anything, for the record)

-

He comes back to Toronto in August.

That honestly catches you by surprise.

More so because you're just home on a Saturday afternoon, watching TV when he knocks on your door. Pretty much the last person you were expecting to see, but you can't deny that your heart ends up in your throat at the sight of him, tanned, bulked up, and looking at you like THAT.

"What..." you start.

"Faith" he breathes out.

You don't understand.

He walks forward into your apartment, crowding you back against the other wall of your tiny entryway.

You're still so caught up in him being here. The way he said your name...

You look up at him.

He just presses himself against you and crushes you to him in a hug. You feel him everywhere. The faint spicy scent of his cologne, the heat of his body, the puff of his breath against your neck where his head is pressing.

Engulfed - your brain provides.

"I missed you" he mutters into your neck.

-

Your brain is going a mile a minute.

How is he here? Why didn't he tell you he was coming back? He doesn't need to be back for weeks. Why is he here? What is happening?

You push him back a little. Not off of you entirely, just enough to give you some space to breathe.

"Auston, what?" You try again.

He looks down at you.

Swallows.

"I..." He starts.

Swallows again.

"I needed to see you, Faith."

He looks... Nervous?

"Aus... What's going on?" You ask him, heart racing out of your chest.

He swears.

"I might be reading this thing wrong, this thing we have, but... I want you to be mine."

You feel like you've been hit with a brick.

All you can do is stare at him as your mind struggles to keep up. You feel yourself reaching for him.

"Aus. Yes. Of course."

He blinks. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

You reach for his hand and pull him to the bedroom.

-

Sex is easy, with you and Auston.

You've never been afraid to ask for what you want. He's never been shy to ask for what he wants. And usually that lines up.

But for the first time since all this started, you feel almost shy with him.

Without discussing it, you both get naked pretty damn quickly. There's a second or twenty where you're just looking at him, drinking in his broad shoulders, his stomach muscles, his trim hips and his thick thighs. God, do you want him.

You might say that last part out loud, from the way he laughs and just picks you up and tosses you on the bed.

You've been soaked since you opened your door, and you're impatient to feel him again. He looks at you and you just whimper his name and he smiles, hitches up your legs, and slides slowly, so slowly, inside you

“Fuck, Aus" you hear yourself.

"You feel so good, baby" he groans out, letting you get used to him stretching you out, leaning down to press a filthy open-mouthed kiss to your lips. He bites at your lips as he starts to move, driving into you in a rhythm that makes you feel so good, hitting you just right.

It’s not enough.

But before you can say anything, Auston pulls back, and changes the angle that your hips are lined up with his and suddenly he’s impossibly deeper, and you just can’t breathe with how good he feels and his hands are on your breasts, and he’s pinching your nipples just right, and you are moaning his name almost like a prayer, and it just slips out.

“Aus, I love you.”

You don’t even realize what you said until he stills for a moment, eyes snapping to yours, and he makes this noise.

“Do you mean it,” he asks.

Its not the time for it, but you’re never going to be his open another time so… “Yeah.”

“God, baby. Yes. I love you too. It’s why I came back. I just wasn’t sure…”

He moves back so he can kiss you, deep and filthy. You feel him, deep inside you, and you just… cling to him. He starts fucking into you in earnest - hard and fast, kissing you the whole time, though it ends up being more like just panting into each others mouths but you can’t get enough of him.

“I’m so close,” you manage to get out.

Auston gets a hand between you and presses his thumb to your clit and you just hear yourself keening.

“I love how you feel around me,” he groans out. “Come for me.”

It doesn’t take long.

You shake apart underneath him, and you feel him pulse inside you and it’s just so much and you can feel tears leaking out from the corner of your eyes, and you just feel so much in that moment.

It’s so much.

-

So sex has never been an issue.

But now it is so much more.

[universalistotalis]

The Fifth Date

Bokuto Koutarou (Timeskip!!!) x Female Reader

credits to the owner of the picture :)

3k words

kinda long but it's worth it i guess

Masterlist!!!

You can’t believe this. You just can’t!

-

“Hey, are you alright?” Bokuto Koutarou looked at you with utmost sincerity in his eyes. You looked up and wondered if he really was worried or just being polite but either way, you stared right at his pupils.

“I am.” You agreed, letting go of his gaze and wanting to end the conversation.

This was your fifth date with him but there were no sparks since the first. You just didn’t feel his vibes and he could be so noisy at times which you hated. There was selfishness underneath his skin and it reeked in your nostrils. You hated egotistic people and you weren’t going to tolerate this much longer.

What your friends saw in Bokuto, you had no idea! They were all swooning over him when they set you up on a date together. They kept saying that he was perfect so you, being the hopeless romantic that you are, expected a prince who would be a gentleman, who would listen to you talk for hours on end, who would be so loving and caring… But instead, you were presented with boastfulness and chaos all wrapped up into one big muscle of a man! He did look like a prince but that was it!

“You know you can tell me right? I’ll listen.” You didn’t mistake the softness in his voice as he continued to stare at you lovingly.

You didn’t know if it was the beautiful place that he brought you to or if it was his kindness that made your brain turn into mush. But for the first time in five dates, your heart was hammering, its beats already like drums in your ears.

“I-I’m fine.” You stuttered and kept your eyes on the horizon.

You heard him sigh beside you on the railing you were both leaning on. The place you both drove to was divine as it overlooked the city. The twinkling lights below were mimicking the stars above and there were lanterns that hung overhead as well, casting the whole place in a lazy glow. You took a deep breath of the fresh air as you calmed yourself from the most stressful day of your life and from your whirlwind of a date.

A little rustling was heard and before you knew it, you were enveloped in warmth and his scent. Bokuto wrapped his jacket around you, letting you face him, so that he could pull the zipper up to your chest.

“There, so you won’t have to worry.” He smiled sweetly.

So he did notice the large coffee stain on your shirt and not once did he show that he was irked by it. You tried your best to cover it but of course you can't. Everyone at work gave you the side glance or the 'what-the-fuck-happened-to-you' look but he didn’t!

-

This can’t be happening. Were you reminiscing all those moments with Koutarou? AND NOW YOU’RE CALLING HIM KOUTAROU?!

You rolled around on your bed, a pillow tucked underneath your arms. A muffled scream was released as you felt an intense tingling sensation all over your body. You were supposed to end that fifth date! You were supposed to tell him that you both should see other people!

But the way he acted that night… it was as if he’s… perfect.

-

“Don’t hide from me.” He whispered in your ear as you cried in his arms. As his scent and warmth put your senses to overdrive with the jacket, you couldn’t help but sob. It was like the world was against you today. Even the document from work that you were so ready to pass, crashed on you. Even the coffee that you made this morning with care, splashed your white collared shirt. Even your ID lace that seemed so insignificant, decided to get caught on the doorknob and almost snapped your neck in two! And to spice things up, your evil boss humiliated you in the inter-department presentation even when the CEO of the company congratulated you on a job well done!

It was the little depressing and annoying moments that accumulated in your chest.

“Today has been s-so hard.” You cried in his shirt. “I keep on trying my best but it’s like I’m not doing enough. I'm not enough.”

The gentle rocking of your body stopped as he heard the words fall out of your mouth.

“Hey, don’t say that.” He cooed and trying to hold you at arm’s length. “You’re more than enough.”

You shook your head and tried to avoid his eyes again as he searched for yours. Fingers gripped on your chin to steady you and you melt for the nth time tonight.

“Don’t be too harsh on yourself. Alright? This day may have been difficult for you and maybe there are more days that would be the same but you shouldn’t doubt your efforts. The fact that you made it through, that’s already something to be grateful about.” He said while wiping your tears away. “But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t cry about them once in a while. Let yourself feel but then get back up again, yeah?”

You nodded but you felt another round of sobs escape your mouth. He pouted as he saw your wounded state and again, you were held close to his broad chest, away from the hurt, the pain, the stress…

-

This was dangerous. Are you actually falling for him? You’re actually falling for the loud guy that you swore you hated?!

‘Hey, hey, hey!’

His voice reverberated inside your skull and with that sound came the print of his smile on your brain. He had the nicest set of teeth and the nicest golden eyes you’ve ever seen. His skin was flawless too and under any light, you swore he was shining.

You couldn’t help but grin at the—

Yes…

This is bad. Really bad.

-

“You wanna dance?” He offered his hand out to you, smiling shyly. You were surprised at his somehow timid expression as you were so used to him being his confident self.

“I don’t know how.” You said breathlessly as you stared at his gorgeous face.

He let out a chuckle and reached out for your hand under the table. “Let’s figure it out, c’mon.”

The platform was small and there were four couples slowly dancing to the romantic song that was being played by a live band.

He led your hands to encircle his neck while his rested on your waist. All the motions, even the slightest graze of his skin on yours, were making your mind hazy. Everything seemed to blur and the only thing that made sense were the two of you in each other’s embrace.

“You’re so tall.” You whispered mindlessly which made him chuckle. He noticed that you could barely wrap your arms around his neck and that your arms were getting floppy due to fatigue. He then guided you to hug him around his waist instead so he could pull you closer.

“I’ve never danced like this before.” He confessed, swaying stiffly at the music.

“I can tell.” You giggle and look up at him in time to see him pout.

He poked your side, deliberately tickling you for a while. “That’s mean.”

“But it’s my first time too. And I kinda like it.” You said shyly, feeling your cheeks warm even with the cold night air.

“You think you could get used to it?” He asked, hope laced in his question.

“Of course.” You smiled up at him.

He smiled back and his eyes twinkled as he stared. He scooped your right hand and brought it to his lips for a quiet kiss then slowly intertwined your fingers with his, all while maintaining eye contact.

-

“AHHHHHHHHH!” You screamed into your pillow again as your head played that scene.

Sleep was so far away now that your adrenaline was so high because of him! You swore you could still feel his lips on your skin. It was as if he imprinted it there and nothing on earth can take that away now.

“Bokuto, stop haunting me! Let me sleep!”

-

“Now, listen here, missy.” The owner of the restaurant pointed to you sternly as she stood behind the counter. “Tell this boyfriend of yours to stop going here and actually get some much deserved rest! Athletes shouldn’t be tiring themselves!”

You chuckled at her actions and stole a glance at Bokuto who’s pouting excessively at the older woman with his hair seemingly deflating at her ministrations.

“But I like your food!” He whined.

The woman clicked her tongue, as if annoyed. “You can have better food from where you live. Now, stop pestering me!”

“I will come back here more often if you say that!” He smirked and leaned on the counter.

“As if! I know you’ll come back no matter what happens.” She rolls her eyes then turned to you. “We can’t get rid of him even if we wanted to!”

They kept bickering back and forth as you waited for the fruit shakes and other snacks that Bokuto ordered for takeout. It was a long drive back home and he said didn’t want you to get thirsty or hungry. You just listened to their banters and even though they were dissing each other out, you can’t miss the loving and motherly look the owner had for Bokuto.

“You’re a regular here?” You asked him as you settled on the carseat.

“I’m a fan of the view. And as you saw, I’m quite close with the owners and the workers. This is my safe space.” He replied and started the engine.

“When was the last time you went here?” You inquired, suddenly curious of his whereabouts.

“Yesterday.” He shrugged. “And the day before that. And maybe the whole of last week.”

Your eyes widened at his answer. “This is like two or three hours away! How?!”

“I needed some place to relax. And think.” He smiled sadly as maneuvered the car to begin the journey back home.

“Are you alright?” You blinked at your question. His voice seemed low and so sad in contrast to his usual loud and noisy screeches that you were so damn used to. This Bokuto in front of you was so hard to read!

He turned to you for a split second before averting his eyes on the road. “I am. I guess.”

“Don’t hide from me.” You bit your lip hard as you repeated his words to you. You wanted to know him more, to understand his feelings, and to make him feel better.

“Hey, you can’t use my lines against me.” He laughed lightly as he looked at you. Your eyes were begging him to tell you how he is and who was he to resist? “I’m just nervous about the incoming games, that’s all.”

“You still get nervous?” You turned to him, a little surprised.

“Why are you so shocked? Of course, I do! Some less nerve- wrecking than the others but I do always get tension at every game.” He sighed and ran a hand through his hair while thinking. “But the upcoming match is a qualifying game for the Olympics so everyone is anxious.”

“Who are you against with?” You asked.

“See, now that’s another one of my worries. The competitors have still not been announced so we have to wait for a month. A whole month! What am I supposed to do?!” He said exasperatedly. “And just last week, one of our teammates got injured so they gave us time off. You know, to rest and shit. But I am restless and—"

“So that’s why you come all the way here?” You concluded.

“Yeah.” He breathed. “The drive gets my mind off of the anxiety and their food just makes me feel like I’m home.”

‘So he is human after all.’ You said to yourself. It was the simplest realization but it did so many wonders for your feelings and understanding towards him.

The drive home was filled with stories of sadness and laughter. You both sipped at your drinks and munched at the chips he bought. And as you both neared your home, it dawned on you that this was the best date you’ve ever had in your life! Bokuto’s so laid back and chill, kind and generous. He listened so intently and patiently to all your life stories and he had a good memory too, remembering the things you’ve told him about yourself in the past dates.

-

You sighed while sitting up. There’s no question that you were falling in deep for this guy. During the drive, he became his noisy self, acting all the spikes he did at the games comically but instead of being annoyed, you had tears in your eyes because you had laughed so much at his acting. You loved listening to him talk and you realized he wasn’t selfish at all!

Go figure.

Maybe you just mistook his confidence for selfishness and egocentricity.

-

You can’t believe that you were itching to lengthen the time you had with him. The car was now parked in front of where you lived and it was time to say goodbye.

Your eyes met and there was a tinge of sadness in his eyes which surprised you.

“Look.” He turned to the passenger seat and leaned closer. “I know that I’m not the best date there is and you may have been agreeing to these just because of obligation from your friends but… I’d like you to know that I—“

Closing his eyes, he exhaled. “I really like you.”

As the words were uttered, your body visibly tenses under his gaze.

Panic rises in his gut as he realized what he did. “S-sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“N-no!” You tried to swallow. “You didn’t scare me.”

“Then why do you look like you’ve seen ghost?” He chuckled lightly not giving up his stares.

Your shoulders slumped as you sighed. “I’m just surprised, that’s all.”

He nodded, still looking. “I guess this will be our last, huh?”

“What?”

“I know you don’t like me and you hate my company. I just really like you so I tried to drag it out for so long.” He said sheepishly as he deflated back into his seat. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable and I’m so sorry if I did.”

This was not how you imagined ending your date. You were supposed to be the one saying that this will be the last. You were supposed to be excited about not seeing him again. You were supposed to go now! But the universe really did pull a reverse card on you today.

“Bokuto…” You started, feeling the guilt consume you to the bones. “I’m sorry if I made you feel that I didn’t like you.”

He was fiddling with his fingers now.

“It's just that your first impressions lasted so bad that it blinded me to who you really were.” Be honest. Just be fuckin’ honest! “I did think I didn’t like you but after tonight, you proved me wrong.”

His face looked at you in a flash, eyes finding the meaning behind your words.

“I didn’t know you could be like this!” You gestured to him, a little frustrated because your heart was pounding so bad and it became so difficult to breathe.

“Like what?” A smirk was beginning to form at his lips.

“This!” You laughed. “You’re fun to be with. You’re calm and reliable when needed. And just… yeah.” You’re just perfect.

You stared at each other’s eyes for a while longer, trying to read and drown in each other.

“If you don’t mind, I’d like to give it another try?” You asked, hoping to god he’ll say yes to your request.

His eyes widened for a moment and his gray hair perked up a little bit.

“I told you I like you.” He smiled. “Why would I say no to that?”

-

Your phone beeped beside you. And if you weren’t so red enough from the memory, you knew that you were flaming red now.

It was a text from Bokuto.

Can’t sleep :(

You sighed at what he said. His anxiety about the game catches onto him so much that he often gets insomnia. The poor baby. You were about to reply when another text popped out.

I may or may not be outside your home.

“What?!” You panicked while swiftly looking for a hoodie to put on. Why is he here and why were you feeling excited at the thought of seeing him?

You asleep, little owl?

You bolted towards the doors and true enough, he was there, leaning on his car and dazzling in all his six feet and three inches glory. He looked unreal in this light even in his simple hoodie and joggers.

“I’m sorry, did I wake you?” His husky voice greeted you as you walked closer.

“No. Can’t sleep too.” You smiled. “What brings you here?”

He shrugged. He didn’t know what came over him when he closed your distance and hugged you tight. To him, you looked like an angel sent to earth only for his eyes to see! You were in an oversized hoodie, hair a little tousled, and your face was so calm under the moonlight. Something inside him prickled at the thought of being domestic with you.

Slowly your arms wrapped around his waist and you surrendered your weight to him. In that moment, he felt like he would burst! Never did he expect for this to happen, for you to give him a chance, but here you were. He deeply breathed in your scent and planted a kiss on the top of your head.

“Do you want to hang out tomorrow?” Your voice was a mere whisper when you looked up at him.

“Like a date?” He grinned and wiggled his eyebrows playfully.

“Yeah?” You nodded.

He wondered if you had any idea about how you're making him feel crazier by the minute. If you don’t, then that’s much worse. “What am I gonna do with you?” He chuckled, arranging stray locks of your hair.

“You can go on a date with me.” You laughed and he was sure, so sure, that you felt his heart do a cartwheel when you were resting your head on his chest.

“I’d like that.” He replied hugging you tighter.

It was funny to you that you planned that fifth date to be the last. It turned out to be the first. The first real date where you felt like a princess in a fairytale. It was the first out of a never- ending series of romantic dates because Bokuto Koutarou had no plans of letting you go. Ever.

--

Okay, wait, hear me out. Have you seen that scene where Bokuto and Akaashi were just outside the hotel and they were just talking all calm and casual? MA'AM THAT'S WHERE I DIED SEEING BOKUTO AHHHH HE'S JUST SO PRECIOUS AND I DO BELIEVE HE CAN BE SERIOUS AND MATURE IF GIVEN THE CHANCE. I AM SIMPING HARD HELP

Masterlist!!!

Reblogs, replies are appreciated! <3

[dream-a-little-bigger-x]

Hero | Luke Patterson

Add yourself to my taglist! | Here’s my masterlist!

Song Fic February Week 4: Musicals 

Inspiration: StarStruck (DCOM)

Requested: Yes/No

A/N: Anon suggested doing something with the Starstruck soundtrack, so I’m writing a whole-ass series. This is based off the plot of Starstruck but the reader was a fan of JATP until she met Luke... Basically crush to enemies to lovers! Also a modern!au.

The third installment of the StarStruck series! 

StarStruck

Something About The Sunshine

Hero

What You Mean To Me

Pairing: Luke x Fem!reader

Song(s) used: Hero - Christopher Wilde (StarStruck ST)

Warnings: few swear words, mention of car accidents, mention of child abuse, mention of postnatal depression, tiny bit of angst

Words: 8.6K

I’m almost nervous to see him again. There’s a nervous flutter erupting from the pit of my stomach and I feel hot and sweaty when it’s not even that warm out. The boy didn’t have that effect on me just a day ago and now he suddenly does? I hate this. 

“Morning,” I greet when I find Luke standing outside the coffee shop with his hood pulled far over his head and sunglasses covering his beautiful eyes. He shoots me a smile, but I don’t think he actually looks at me. Right, the whole “I can’t be seen with you”-thing. 

“Want to go grab some coffee before we go?” I ask instead, pointing at the shop. 

Luke nods his head and follows me inside where we wait in line together. The silence that hangs over us is uncomfortable for the first time. I don’t know why but his mysterious, secretive antics are making me nervous. 

“Next!” the barista calls and the two of us step forward. The twenty-something woman shoots the both of us a polite smile, not even acknowledging that Luke’s keeping his head low. This is L.A., she’s probably used to it by now. “What can I get for ya?” 

“An iced vanilla latte for me, please,” I say and then glance down at Luke. 

He coughs. “Iced caramel macchiato.” His voice is low, just above a whisper, as though he’s telling the barista and me a secret. I’m glad we’re going to be out of the city soon, so Luke can go back to his regular self. Or to the singing-on-top-of-a-car-in-the-middle-of-nowhere self. 

“What’s your name, please?” 

“Y/N…” My eyes land on Luke for a split second, and I’m pretty sure he’s not even going to answer. Luke’s a pretty generic name, I’m sure people won’t even bother to look up. “Put my name on both, please.” 

The barista smiles and then dashes off after I paid to start making our coffees while we shuffle towards the end of the counter, ready to take our drinks when they’re ready. Luke keeps his head down. He doesn’t even look up at me and the awkward silence doesn’t eb away.  

“You’re not gonna talk to me yet, are you?” I ask him as I hand him one of the two straws I picked up. He shakes his head. I try my hardest not to groan and instead, hand him the keys to my car. “Here, get yourself settled in my car, I’ll handle this.” 

His eyes peer over the rim of his sunglasses, flickering with uncertainty and gratefulness at the same time. I shoot him a smile, urging him to get out of here, which he does with a quick flash of his teeth. 

The awkwardness quickly washes off me when he’s left the coffee shop and I’m all alone, hoping everything would change once we’re all alone, away from the prying eyes of Los Angeles’ residents. 

“Iced vanilla latte and iced caramel macchiato for y/n,” the barista calls and places the cups on the counter in front of me. 

I smile at her, say, “Thank you! Bye!” and then dart out of the coffee shop as fast as I could. I weave my way through hasty people and slacking tourists towards my Toyota Yaris where a hooded boy sits in my passenger seat. He still has his hood pulled up and his sunglasses balancing on the bridge of his nose. He almost looks sad, which makes me a little sad too. I wish I could do more than let him wait in my car. 

“Here you go,” I say and hand him his coffee when I’ve settled into my seat. 

“Thank you,” he mutters, and I’m pretty sure it’s not just for the beverage. 

A smile etches its way to my cheeks as I regard him. “You’re welcome,” I say and then start the engine. As I pull out of the parking lot, Luke finally sparks up a conversation. I’m almost relieved to hear his voice again for more than two words.    

“Where’re we going?” he asks. 

I debate telling him but then decide I’d do it anyway. I’ve been researching a lot last night and have found the greatest secluded spots and the time slots when they’re mostly deserted or have the least visitors. The one I wanted to take him to today was a lot closer than the other ones, so I figured we could start with that. 

“The Old L.A. Zoo. It’s less crowded before 9am, so I figured we could go explore it a bit until too many people arrive?” The statement comes out of my mouth as a question since I’m unsure whether or not he’d like that. 

“Cool,” he replies, and he sounds honest, too. “I don’t think I’ve ever been there.” 

It surprises me a little, but I go with it anyway. “Really? I’ve been there plenty of times! It’s really cool! Kinda spooky.” Luke lets out an airy laugh at that and it makes my heart flutter a little. 

Within ten minutes, we arrive at the old zoo. Ten minutes had gone by and yet it felt like a split second. The conversation ran fluently on our way there and Luke told me things about the band and his childhood that not even the biggest fangirl on earth could possibly know. I love talking to Luke about those seemingly uninteresting, small things. 

The rest of the morning, too, goes by as if there’s no concept of time whatsoever. The two of us walk through the old, abandoned zoo and explore every single old habitat. I even find a website that tells us the entire history of each section of the zoo and as I read it, Luke listens and adds in his own commentary. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed this much in just a few  hours. This guy is genuinely funny and I just adore talking to him. Our conversations go from the ridiculous to the serious, and every subject in between. 

It’s just the perfect day that I wish would never end, but inevitably, Luke has his own responsibilities and has to go by lunch time. 

“Hey, why don’t you come with me to the studio?” he asks with a smile as we’re making our way back to the car. “I’m in there all by myself, aside from our producer, and I’m recording a few songs.” 

I open and close my mouth a few times, letting incomprehensible sounds roll out. It makes me look like a dumbfounded fish, I’m sure, but I don’t care. My brain is dysfunctioning for a moment. Luke Patterson is asking me to come to the studio with him. To watch him record some songs. Songs that are going to be on the album. 

Luke’s laugh makes the gears in my brain fall back into place. “Is that a yes?” he asks. 

A heat rises up to my cheeks. “Yeah,” I finally manage. 

“Cool,” he says and then gets into the car. 

The ride to the studio is filled with smooth conversation. We never miss a beat, there’s never an awkward silence between the two of us. Only when we arrive at the recording studio and we’re met with a huddle of paparazzi outside the door.

“Fuck,” he mutters and ducks down. I do the same, knowing he doesn’t want me to be seen with him either. “Drive around back,” he orders before fumbling into the glove compartment of my car. He retrieves a pair of sunglasses I kept there, along with a shawl of my mother’s that I didn’t know was still in there. “Put this on.” 

“No,” I reply sternly, pushing his hand with the shawl away. I do take the sunglasses from his hand though, and push them onto my nose. “Put that shawl away,” I bark. The boy obeys and stuffs the piece of cursed fabric back where it came from. 

Mental note: throw that out. 

When we finally do get into the recording studio, as soon as I’m on Luke’s side, he grabs my hand and drags me into the building before anyone could ever spot us. I nearly stumble on my own feet, but quickly pick myself back up before I faceplant the floor. 

Luke huffs. “Phew, that was close.” 

He looks at me, and for a second, I think he might bring up the shawl again, but he doesn’t and instead turns to his producer, who had gotten up from his swivel chair the second we burst in.  

“Connor!” Luke greets excitedly and shakes the man’s hand. 

He looks near his thirties, strong built with flawless dark skin and a full head of afro hair. Combined with his extremely savvy outfit, I find him really cool-looking. He’s the kind of guy that would get all the girls in high school while still being a sweetheart. 

“You brought some new flesh, I see,” Connor says to me and outstretches his hand for me to shake. I do so with a wide smile on my face while pretending not to be completely nervous about being in a recording studio for the first time. 

“Y/N,” I introduce myself. 

“Welcome to our little slice of heaven on earth, y/n.” My eyes flick to Luke, who’s giving me that look again, so I quickly turn back to Connor. “Any knowledge of recording studios, y/n?” he asks. 

“Never been in one, but my friend is a producer and he did teach me some things.” 

I hear Luke huff beside me. “I didn’t know that.” 

“Well, there’s a lot you don’t know.” I shoot him a wink as Connor beckons me towards his deck. For a while, Connor guides me through his paces while Luke gives the best of himself on this song. 

After a few takes, Luke comes out of the booth and joins me and Connor to listen to what we’d recorded thus far. “What if –” I pause, debating my thoughts. “What if we go in with some soft backing vocals on here?” I click the part of the chorus we’d recorded and sing along with recorded Luke. 

“'Cause I I can be everything you need If you're the one for me Like gravity I'll be unstoppable I, yeah, I believe in destiny I may be an ordinary guy With heart and soul But if your the one for me Then I'll be your hero”

“I think if you put Julie on those backings, it could give that duet-vibe you guys are so good at.” I notice Connor and Luke glance at each other, soft smiles playing on both their lips. 

“Why don’t you show us?” Connor asks as Luke already grabs my hand. 

“What?! Me? No! Julie.” 

Luke chuckles and drags me into the booth with him. “Yeah, but we’re gonna need a demo, don’t we?” He delicately places a set of headphones on my head before placing one on his own. He signals to Connor and no later than 2 seconds, the instrumental version of the song blasts through the headphones. 

Gazing at me, Luke starts singing the first verse of the song, and I let him. It almost feels like he’s serenading me. Almost. All that’s missing is a guitar or a boombox over his head. 

“I'm no superman I can't take your hand And fly you anywhere you want to go Yeah I can't read your mind Like a billboard sign And tell you everything you want to hear But I'll be your hero”

From the chorus onwards, I jump in with backing vocals wherever I feel like it’s acceptable without taking my eyes off of Luke. 

“I I can be everything you need If you're the one for me Like gravity I'll be unstoppable I, yeah, I believe in destiny I may be an ordinary guy With heart and soul But if you're the one for me Then I'll be your hero”

“Could you be the one Could you be the one for me” “Oh I'll be your hero” “Could you be the one Could you be the one for me” “Yeah I'll be your hero”

“So incredible Some kind of miracle That's what it's meant to be I'll become a hero So I wait, wait, wait, wait for you”

We keep our eyes locked at the high note too, smiles plastered on our faces from ear to ear. Singing with Luke gives me some kinda rush. A feeling I can’t quite describe but it’s a feeling I want to feel more often. 

“Yeah, I'll be your hero Yeah”

“Cause I I can be everything you need If you're the one for me Like gravity I'll be unstoppable I, Yeah, I believe in destiny I may be an ordinary guy with and soul But if you're the one for me I'll be your hero”

“Yeah, I'll be your hero”

“Could you be the one Could you be the one for me”

“Yeah I'll be your hero”

The music fades out in our headphones, and soon, Connor’s applause sounds through it instead. I’m snapped back into reality, away from cloud 9, away from the pure bliss that’s singing with Luke and gazing into his eyes. 

“That was amazing! Good job, guys!” Connor says, beaming. 

Luke and I remove our headphones and he grabs my hand to lead me back to the decks where Connor welcomes us with open arms and a wide smile. 

“I thought you and Julie were the most watchable duetters, but I’ve been proven wrong.” 

I feel the heat rise to my cheeks before Luke snaps me out of it again. 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever, Con. Can you send the finished product to the band and our manager? I’m sure they’d like to hear this. Don’t tell them who’s on backing vocals, though. They don’t need to know that.”

I swallow a lump in my throat and try to convince myself it’s probably not that deep. Luke doesn’t want to be seen with me. Not even by his band mates. It’s fine. It’s totally fine. 

We wrap up the recording session and I drive Luke back to the coffee shop where he looks behind him and out of every single one of the windows, just to be sure the coast is clear of paparazzi. 

“Thanks for the day, y/n. I really enjoyed spending time with you again.” 

I force a smile. Ever since his statement to Connor about not wanting the band to know about me, I’ve been going over everything in my mind and it has caused me to fold in on myself.

“Yeah, it was fun.” 

He gazes at me for a moment, inspecting every inch of my face as if detecting the lie from my eyes. When I think he’s just going to bid his goodbyes and get out, he doesn’t. Instead, he turns his body to me and reaches for his phone. I watch as he unlocks it and taps away on it before turning the device towards me. There’s a new contact form open on his screen. 

“Gimme your number. I’d love to do this again some day.” 

I furrow my brow while taking the phone in my hands. “Do you even have time to spend days with a nobody like me?” I don’t dare look at him and keep my eyes on the screen as I type my name and number. 

He doesn’t say anything either until I finally cave and look up when giving his phone back. There’s a crease in his forehead as his eyebrows are knitted together in confusion. 

“You’re not a nobody, y/n. I’d gladly make time for you. I told you, I loved spending days away from reality. Especially with you.” Fangirl Me is jumping out of my skin while Present Me tries to keep her cool and ignore all of the butterflies that erupt in her stomach. 

“Cool,” Present Me says out loud while Fangirl Me is scolding her so hard. 

Cool? Cool?! Seriously? Dude.   

“I’ll text you, yeah?” 

I nod my head in response and watch as he gets out of my car. Before I can even place my foot on the gas or shift out of park, my phone beeps in the pocket of my sweater. For the first time in forever, I smile when seeing an unknown number on my screen. 

As I look out of my window, I find Luke looking at me with his hood pulled over his head again. He shoots me a quick smile and a wave before I turn to my phone again and type a reply. 

I whip my head up to see his reaction. His jaw drops before his face turns into a scowl as he glares at me. Giggling and satisfied with the reaction, I place my phone on the passenger’s seat where Luke was sitting before and then pull out of the parking spot. 

That night, I save Luke’s number to my phone. I go between “Luke P.”, “Patterson” and “Luke ❤️” but eventually decide on the funnier option and save him as “Poo Musician 💩”.   

I stand in line at the coffee shop before 8:30 that morning and I’m a little nervous. Last night when I returned from my day with Luke, the two of us had been texting back and forth. I felt like a sixteen year old again. One of those giggly teenagers that’s texting their crush. Which is what I was, but it’s been a while since I felt like it. 

Once I have an iced vanilla latte and an iced caramel macchiato, I head outside where I find a boy waiting by my car. He’s wearing a sleeveless shirt paired with a bright blue sleeveless sweater, his hood pulled far over his head so his face is hidden from prying eyes. 

I don’t need to see his face to know it’s Luke. I’d recognize those muscles from a mile away. The way he’s leaning against the hood of my car and the way he’s holding his phone is a dead giveaway too. 

“Your coffee, sir,” I say in a serious, deep voice. 

Luke’s head snaps up, eyes wide. He looks like a deer caught in headlights until he notices it’s just me and relaxes. A smile etches onto his face as he tucks his phone into the pocket of his jeans whilst taking the coffee I ordered for him with his other hand. 

He takes a cautious sip from the beverage. “Hm, Caramel Macchiato, someone’s been stalking me.” I know he’s just teasing, I can tell by the way one corner of his mouth curls up and his eyes have that childlike glint in them. 

Making my way to the driver’s side of my car, I smile and say, “Contrary to popular belief, Patterson, I’m not a stalker. I just remembered your order from yesterday.” 

Luke’s smile tells me something I’d rather not think about. It’s like he’s saying “You remembered my order” in that flirty way only he knows how to. I simply shrug before opening my door and getting in with Luke following my example. Without missing a beat, he fishes my phone from between my fingers and grabs my free hand to use my thumb to unlock my phone. This time, I don’t object and let him. I know that it’s just to get to my music app anyway. 

While Journey’s Anyway You Want It plays through the car’s speakers, I pull out of the parking spot in front of the coffee shop and start driving to the next location I’d found during my research the other night. 

“Where’re we going?” he asks, and I flashback to yesterday when he asked me the exact same question in that exact same way. 

I smile as I place my cup in the cupholder between the two of us. “You’ll see.” I glance over, finding him tilting his head slightly and giving me that ‘Really?’ look. “I promise it’s very secluded and not a lot of people will be there.” 

“Cool,” he says and sips. “Is this where you’re going to kidnap me and hold me for ransom? I bet you could get a lot of money for a Julie and The Phantoms band member.” 

I snort at his remark. “How much do you think I could get for you?” 

He scrunches up his nose in thought, which I catch as I take a quick glance at him again. As I face the road again, I reach for my coffee and take a quick sip, awaiting Luke’s response to my question. 

“Like 10k?” 

I nearly spit out my coffee. “10k?!” I screech, and his laugh thunders through my car. “Careful or I’ll actually kidnap you and hold you for ransom if I’m gonna earn that much.” 

The laughter dies down and after a few moments of silence lingering in the air, Luke says, “How much do you think I’m worth?” 

Without missing a beat, I respond to his question, dead serious. “Not even a dollar.”  

Luke gasps, his mouth dropping in absolute disbelief while I can’t help but cackle loudly. Judging from this conversation alone, I’m positive today will be a good day. A good, fun day. 

“I’m worth more than a dollar, right?” 

“No, you’re right, I’d probably ask like a million and then no one will pay the ransom and you’ll have to stay with me for the rest of your life.” 

I let out my best maniacal laughter as I feel him watch me. I know the exact look he’s giving me. The look. The one with the glistening eyes and the slightly turned up lips. The one all girls and gays swoon for. The one I would swoon for if I’d turn my head right now. But I don’t. For once in my life, I’m smart and keep my eyes on the road. 

“You like me,” he states proudly. 

“Slightly less strong dislike.” I’m lying through my teeth, but I’m hoping Luke won’t notice. Or at least not acknowledge it because I can already feel the heat rising to my cheeks. 

“I’ll take it.” 

He reaches forward and turns the volume up as Taylor Swift’s “Blank Space” floats through the speakers. Very loudly, and very obnoxiously, the boy begins to sing along. If it wasn’t for the velvet smooth voice, I would’ve scolded at him to keep it down. But the sound actually makes my toes curl and my stomach flutter. For a verse, I let him sing by himself while I enjoy his performance but by the chorus, I can’t withhold myself and sing along with him. 

The rest of the ride is filled with belting of the road trip tunes, laced with patches of small talk. It’s the perfect car ride, and before we know it, we’ve arrived at our destination. Santa Fe Dam Recreation Area. The parking lot is practically empty, aside from two cars, which I’m assuming are the staff’s. It’s the perfect indication that I picked the right spot to go to, and I can tell Luke knows it too. 

He’s bouncing in his seat, either from excitement or the amount of sugar that was in his iced coffee, and when I turn off the ignition and turn to him, he looks at me with the widest smile plastered on his face. He almost looks like an excited toddler on Christmas morning, ready to open his presents. 

“I came here once with my parents when I was younger,” he tells me, “I love this place.” 

His confession makes me smile. “Good because I’ve been scouring the internet for the perfect place.” He shoots me the look again. “Stop looking at me like that.” 

“Like what?” 

“Like you’re going to kiss me.” 

He shrugs, “Maybe I want to.” 

“So you want me to slap you?” 

His smile fades away immediately. “Let’s go,” he grumbles and quickly gets out. 

I heave in a deep breath, recollecting myself before getting out too and retrieving the backpack I brought, filled with stuff for today. Including my itinerary – or just a notebook filled with some ideas I had. 

“How about we start with a bike ride across the park?” I suggest, pointing at the bike rental shop I found on Google the other night. 

We walk into the rental place, expecting there to be bikes upon bikes but instead, we’re met with kayaks, pedal boats and go-karts. My eyebrows furrow, creasing my forehead as I look around the space. Why’s this called a bike rental when there are technically no bikes to rent? No actual bikes. 

“I thought we were going for a bike ride?” Luke says, teasingly. I look up at him, and I think my face tells him enough about my knowledge about this place. My research clearly wasn’t sufficient. 

Deciding to just roll with the circumstances, I roll my shoulders back and put a smile on my face. “Yeah, we’re going on a bike ride with one of these!” I say and point to the large, green go-kart. One of those that look like an old-school car at the front and have children’s seats in front of the terribly cushioned seats for adults. The ones with the small plastic wheel and bike pedals for two adults. I remember going on one of those big ones for six people with my family. 

“You’re serious?” Luke asks, his eyes wide. 

Instead of answering, I shoot him a smile before stepping forwards towards the staff member at the counter. The woman behind the counter looks no older than 45 and has long, billowing blonde locks that cascade down her shoulders. Her bright blue piercing eyes glisten as they land on the two of us, clearly glad she sees some customers so early in the day. 

“Good morning,” she greets with a smile, “We open in half an hour.” 

“Oh…” My research has been poor. 

Before I can possibly think of an answer, Luke steps forward and flashes the woman a smile. I’m not sure if he’s going to use his manly charms or if he’s going to pull the “Don’t you know who I am?” card. 

“Can’t you… make an exception for us?” he asks, leaning his elbow on the counter as he looks at the woman through his lashes. The woman looks up at Luke, her face like stone. She doesn’t recognize him and doesn’t fall for his charms either. 

Shaking my head, I spring into action. I quickly change the ring on my index finger to my ring finger and wrap my arm around Luke’s bicep while the other rests on his chest, making sure the ring is as visible as can be. As I flutter my eyelashes at the woman, I let the words tumble out of my mouth. 

“Please, ma’am? It’s our one year engagement anniversary and he was going to take me on this romantic bike ride….” I then lean forward over the counter. “He’s not very good at researching our dates, but he tries.” 

The woman’s eyebrows knit together as her eyes dart from me to Luke and back. 

“Aren’t you guys a little young to be engaged?” 

Luke jumps into the improvisation spot. “We’ve been told that a lot but we’ve been best friends for years and there’s no one I’d rather spend the rest of my life with.” He looks down at me and when I glance up, too, he kisses the tip of my nose, which I then scrunch. 

I ignore the flutters in my stomach and face the woman again. She seems to have softened, her eyes less icy than it was before. Then, she turns to her computer and clicks through a few browsers before facing us again. 

“What do you guys want? The Surrey?” She points to the green bike-thing at the front of the shop. I nod my head in response. “Okay. You’ve got it for two hours for the price of one hour.” 

A smile etches its way to my face. “That’s perfect, thank you.” 

 Luke pays the woman the rental fee and then she helps us get Surrey out of the garage. After bidding our goodbyes, Luke and I pedal off on the bike. 

“One year engagement, really?” Luke asks me when we’re far enough from the rental and I switch my rings back around. 

“Well, whatever you were doing didn’t work.” 

 He scoffs. “It was working.” 

We pedal down the winding road with the wind blowing through our hair. I love how warm the breeze is and how the birds are chirping in the trees around us. This is the perfect day to go out and do this. 

“What exactly were you planning to do?” I ask him, glancing up at him. He’s focusing on the road ahead of us, a comfortable smile resting on his lips while his eyes flick from one side to another, taking everything in. 

He glances down at me, the smile turning into a smirk. “I was going to charm her with my manly wiles.” 

“And how was that working for ya?” 

For a second, we lock eyes. Luke has an annoyed look on his face while I can’t help but have my lips curl up on one side into a smirk. When he whips his head forward again, I notice the slight tint of pink covering his cheeks. 

Did I just make Luke Patterson blush? 

“So,” he coughs. “Whatcha wanna do?”

I shrug. “We could play twenty questions? Get to know each other better.” 

He nods his head in response. “You wanna start?” 

“That’s your first question?” 

“That’s yours?” 

I press my lips together, shutting myself up for just a moment before recomposing myself. I’m not going to lie, I totally Googled some questions to ask in a game of 20 questions. So, I’m prepared. 

“If you had to be trapped on a deserted island with one of your friends, who would you pick and why?” Luke’s eyes widen at the question a little. 

“Woah, straight in! I thought you were gonna start with ‘favorite color’ or something.” He chuckles lightly, and so do I. “Uhm… Not Alex, he’d probably be super anxious and pace all the way across the island and make me nervous. Not Reggie either, he’d be singing country songs the entire time, though he is a great cuddler. Maybe Julie? Though she’s gonna be miserable without Flynn….” 

With every thought he says out loud, my smile grows bigger and bigger. 

“You?” My heart leaps in my chest at his answer. “Yeah, I like spending time with you and what better place to get away from real life than a deserted island, right?” 

Without missing a beat, the next words pour out of my mouth. “It’s cute how you think we’re friends now.” I surprise myself with the words I speak. We are friends, but I like winding him up into thinking we’re not. 

“Friends who wanna kiss each other.” 

Ignoring the heat rising to my cheeks, I reply, “You mean kill?” 

Luke shakes his head, an amused smile on his face. “When are you going to admit that you like me?” 

“Never – Next question.” 

“Uhm… What was the last thing you stole or shoplifted?” he asks and I’m glad he doesn’t push any further on the fact I basically admitted that I like him. 

“Oh! A magnet in a tourist shop in Lanzarote,” I reply, giggling a little at the memory. “I was there with a couple of friends during Spring Break and those magnets cost way too much for what they are and there was like a rack outside the shop. So, I shoplifted an overpriced Lanzarote magnet.” 

Luke throws his head back as he laughs, nearly steering us into the bushes. “That’s amazing,” he cackles.  

We cruise through the entire park for two entire hours, asking each other questions, and after returning the Surrey, we walk towards the lake where we settle down onto the blanket I brought for some food. I’d prepared an entire picnic basket for us to enjoy during our lunch. 

“I find it very cute that you made an entire picnic basket for our first date.” 

I smile. “I find it very cute that you think this is a date.” 

He gives me the look again, but I ignore it and get every piece of food out of my backpack, sprawling it out around us. Sandwiches, chopped up vegetables and fruits, muffins,... All the delicious foods you’d find in a picnic. 

“Tell me more about your childhood,” Luke then says as he takes a chicken sandwich and takes a bite. “You don’t talk about it much.” 

My heart drops into my stomach. I wish he wouldn’t ask about that. Talking about my childhood means talking about my mother and I’ve been trying to avoid that for the past years. Not that many of my friends even know about that. 

“I told you plenty.” 

“You talked about your teenage years, but never about your childhood.” 

I take a deep breath. He’s not going to shut up about this until I tell him. It’s not that I don’t trust him, it’s just that I don’t love talking about what happened with my mother. It’s something I’d much rather forget. 

“There’s a reason for that,” I reply pointedly and then shut myself up by taking a sip from the box of orange juice. I’d packed one for the both of us, but I’m the only one who’s opened it already as Luke had gone straight in with the sandwiches. 

Luke stares at me expectantly, waiting for me to continue. His eyes pierce through my soul and give me a sense of comfort. They lift a weight of my shoulders and chest that I hadn’t even noticed were there. His eyes feel like coming home. Comfortable. A place to relax. A place to be me, be myself. 

I heave in a deep breath and place my juice box on my nervously bouncing knee, holding it with my hand. It doesn’t stop the bouncing, so now my whole body is practically shaking along with the movement. 

“I–” I stop myself, reconsidering my words. “My childhood wasn’t the sunshine and roses it’s supposed to be.” I chuckle nervously and when I meet Luke’s eyes again, they’re looking at me with such intent that I almost launch forward and kiss him. But I don’t. 

“Mom was… difficult to live with…” I start cautiously,  not even daring to look at Luke as I speak and keep my eyes on the still lake in front of us. “She uhm… After I was born, she kinda went into postnatal depression. She didn’t take care of me, she barely even looked at me… At one point, it went so far that she got into an accident, on purpose, with me in the back. She did it a few times, even, to the point where dad just had to report it. She was admitted to the psych ward and that was that... I was ten at the time.” I swallow to hold back the tears that are pricking behind my eyes. 

Feeling a soft brush of the hand on my knee, I glance up, meeting Luke’s eyes. They give me that sense of comfort again, that sense of home, the reassurance that I’m okay. 

“We haven’t really seen her since. She’s out of our lives…” I sniffle and place my hand over Luke’s, giving it a thankful squeeze. “I don’t like talking about it.” 

Luke carefully laces his fingers through mine, his cold rings cooling my warm hand. “I’m sorry I brought it up.” I shrug dismissively. “But thank you for telling me.” 

“So, tell me,” I lift our entwined hands for a second as though pulling us back into reality. “How did Sunset Curve-slash-Julie and The Phantoms came to be?” 

Luke chuckles before engulfing our locked hands with his other and tumbling into the origin story of the bands he was in. He talks about meeting Reggie and Alex in primary school, and then meeting Bobby in middle school. He explains how they started the band in music class and then continued playing together until Bobby moved away from Los Angeles. The story then lapses into giggles and chuckles about all the things they tried to keep Sunset Curve alive, but terribly failed. 

“But then we met Julie in high school and – the rest is history.” 

We’re clearing up our mess before making our way back towards the car. I love hearing Luke talk, especially about the band. It makes his eyes light up and he gets all bouncy and enthusiastic. It’s the cutest side of Luke I ever did see in the past few days of hanging out with  him.

I take one last look at the lake where tiny dots of humans are floating along on the lake in their tiny boats. There are just a few, so nothing to worry about, but it does make me want to go kayaking too. Mostly because I don’t want the day to end. 

“Wanna go kayaking?” I ask Luke, pulling him to a halt by tugging at our still intertwined hands. His eyes dart from mine to the lake and back. I can tell he’s debating it, but then he nods and a smile appears on his face. 

With our hands intertwined, we go back to the rental place and ask the woman for a double kayak. We pay, put on the safety vests she’s given us and then proceed onto the water. As we pedal along, Luke tells me about all the adventures he’s been on with his friends and how he used to do this all the time before his schedule got so crazy. 

Every now and again, he stops and pretends to tip the kayak, making me squeal each and every time whilst he laughs his most maniacal laugh. 

The wall I’d built around my heart was slowly crumbling. Every laugh, every touch, every glance took away a small part of the brick wall. I’m falling in love with the boy I’d had a crush on and then strongly disliked for a good five-ish days. 

Getting distracted was not a good idea as I’m not prepared for what follows next. Luke pretends to tip it over again, but this time, he wobbles too hard and actually makes the boat topple overhead. I squeal, but quickly shut my mouth as I tumble into the water, making sure not too much of the lake’s contents gets into my body. 

“Patterson!” I scowl as I crash the surface again and find Luke laughing a few feet away. His brown, shaggy hair sticks to his head, dripping small drops of water onto his face. If I wasn’t so angry at him, I would definitely kiss him right here, right now. 

“I hate you!” I splash some water at him as the words roll off my lips. Luke’s laughter abruptly stops and he stares at me. His once glistening eyes dull down while his mouth falters into a frown. 

“You do?” 

My face softens as I watch him. He looks so beautiful with his hair all dishevelled and the reflection of the sun on the water mirroring onto his face. I want to kiss him. I want to kiss him so bad. 

I swim closer towards him and stroke his wet hair out of his face. My breath hitches in my throat at how close we are but I try to play it off by keeping my hands on his face and my eyes locked with his. I notice his eyes flicking down to my lips a few times, telling me he wants to kiss me as much as I want to kiss him. 

Should I? Full throttle? Or step on the brakes? 

I don’t even get the time to think about it as Luke presses his lips to mine. Now I don’t hesitate a single moment and immediately kiss him back. Sliding my hands into his wet locks and pressing my body as close as I can, I melt entirely into him. The same sense of bliss I have when singing with Luke washes over me and I find myself on cloud 9 again.  

We pull back after a moment to catch our breath. The glint in his eyes is back and his mouth, though a little swollen and red, curls up into a smile. He presses one more kiss to my nose before helping me towards the shore. We climb out of the water and bring the boat back to the rental place, along with our safety vests. 

Grabbing my backpack I had left with the woman for safekeeping, Luke and I bid our goodbyes and leave the rental, intertwining our hands again. The feeling his hand in mine gives me will never get old. 

As we get to the car again, I yawn, feeling a sense of exhaustion wash over me. Luke smiles upon noticing this and takes the keys from my hand. Wordlessly, he presses a kiss to my forehead and then leads me to the passenger side. He opens the door and lets me get in before shutting the door and jogging to the other side. 

The car is filled with a comfortable silence, just the crackling of a song playing on the radio filling out the quietness. I rest my head against the headrest and glance at Luke every now and again as he drives Sabrina. He has that one-hand feel on the steering wheel and the other rest comfortably in mine on the gearshift. 

“I had a lot of fun today,” I mumble, unable to speak any louder. 

A smile etches its way to Luke’s face. “Me too.” He takes a quick glance at me and then lifts our hands to plant a kiss on my knuckles. “Our band’s house is closer, you want to stop there and get us dry before you go home?” 

I hum softly, letting my eyes fall shut for a moment. Luke’s thumb grazing the back of my hand almost lulls me to sleep until he curses before the car comes to a halt. He pulls his hand away from mine and when I look up, the driveway and street in front of the enormous white-brick house is filled with dozens of cars. 

“Fuck, I forgot about the album wrap party,” he grumbles and then looks over at me. I’m shivering from the cold and exhaustion. “I can’t let you drive home like that.” 

I’m unsure if he’s talking to me or pondering out loud, but I shake my head instead. “It’s fine,” I say. “My house isn’t that far away… I think…” 

“No, y/n. I’m not letting you drive home exhausted and cold.” His voice is stern, yet laced with a bit of worry. “You’re gonna come in and I’m– I’m gonna bring you up to my room. You can dry off there and maybe take a nap or something. Yeah! Yeah, that’s it!” He sounds way too excited about something so banal. 

He hops out of the car and quickly jogs over to my side whilst I’m already opening the door. Before I could react, he tugs me towards the house. I can barely get my bearings or take the time to look where I’m going before I’m pulled into a room. 

“There are shirts and joggers in the dresser over there, pick out whichever you like and then take a nap or something. I’ll be back before you know it.” He kisses my cheek and then dashes towards the door. 

“You’re just gonna leave me here?” 

He lets go of the door handle and slowly turns towards me. His eyes are laced with regret as he takes in the sight in front of him. I must look ridiculous with my hair and clothes wet and bags under my eyes. 

“Please, y/n? I can’t have people know about us, okay? I just – can’t…” 

Turning on his heel, he opens the door and leaves me in his bedroom all alone. I take a minute to let the information process in my brain before turning around and taking in the room I’m in. 

The walls are painted white, except for the one wall behind his bed that’s a muted dark blue. His bed is king size and on either side is a nightstand. I inch closer to the one that’s actually filled with stuff, which I’m assuming is the one he uses most. Nightstand contents often tell a lot about a person. His contains the band’s autobiography, “Bruce Springsteen: All The Songs” and “Beach Read” by Emily Henry, the book I started the other week and shared on Instagram Stories. 

Would he have seen that and decided to read it too? 

Shaking the ridiculous thought out of my head, I move over to his dresser and take out a pair of joggers and his Rush muscle tank I’ve seen him in many a time during gigs. I peel my drenched clothes off my body and get into Luke’s freshly washed ones. They smell of his laundry products. It’s a fresh and calming scent.

For a while, I look around his room. The books on the shelves and the pictures on the walls, most of which of the band and some of him and Carrie Wilson. There had been a rumor about him dating the Instagram Influencer, but I’d never believed it until I saw her face pop up in some of the framed photos in his room. 

I decide to go and venture about the house since all the commotion seems to be outside in the garden. I weave through hallway upon hallway, finding more photos and more things that belong to the band. The living room walls are adorned with platinum records and other awards they’d won over the two years they’d been active in the music industry. I can’t help but feel a sense of pride rush over me. That’s my favorite band right there. That’s the boy I’ve fallen in love with. 

“Excuse me – Who are you?” 

The voice makes me jump out of my skin. I thought everyone was outside. When I look up, I find the perfectly flawless face of Carrie Wilson. Her long, blonde hair cascades into curls down her shoulders and back while her round, brown eyes stare at me with intent and curiosity. 

“Oh, sorry. I’m y/n. I–” I stop myself, remembering Luke didn’t want anyone to know about us. That includes his girlfriend – or ex-girlfriend. 

Carrie’s mouth curls up into an amused, curious smile, catching onto what’s happening. “You’re Luke’s new adventure, aren’t you?” I huff out the breath I was holding. It’s a telling huff, I’m sure. “You are…” She trails off and inspects me for a second before continuing. “Just so you know, it’s not going to work. Luke’s too infatuated with this lifestyle of his. He loves his job, he loves his stardom. He loves it too much to ever focus on a partner. Believe me, we tried.” 

I exhale at the use of her past tense, but then all the other information downs on me. Luke’s life is so much different from mine. While I work several jobs to pay for college and still live with my dad, he lives by himself and tours the world. He’s too busy to start anything serious with me. Whatever happened in the last few days was just temporary. 

“You seem sweet, y/n, so I’m going to be frank. Get out before it’s too late. You’re only gonna get hurt if you’re gonna stay.” As she passes me, she places a reassuring hand on my shoulder.  

If my brain wasn’t going a mile a second about everything she’s telling me, I would be caught off guard by how sweet Carrie Wilson is. She’s always portrayed as this complete ego-centric bitch who used people to her advantage. 

The exhaustion taking over, I shuffle back upstairs and sit down on Luke’s bed but when I hear the commotion outside die down and guitar strums float through the air into the house, I grow curious. I get up from the bed and make a beeline towards the ceiling-to-floor glass doors that give out onto a balcony. I carefully open the door and step out, the summer breeze tickling my skin while Luke’s voice reaches my ears. 

The balcony looks out onto the garden, it’s just out of sight from where everyone’s huddled up around the band. I lean my elbows on the bannister and watch on as Luke’s voice floated through the air. 

“I'm no superman I can take your hand And fly you anywhere you wanna go, yeah I can read your mind Like a billboard sign And tell you everything you wanna hear, but I'll be your hero”

I smile at the memory of us in the studio yesterday. The last few days have been perfect. Just… Perfect. And now this girl has to come and ruin it by pulling me back into reality. 

“Cause I, I can be everything you need If you're the one for me, like gravity, I'll be unstoppable I, yeah I believe in destiny I may be an ordinary guy without his soul But if you're the one for me Then I'll be a hero Oh, I'll be a hero, yeah I'll be a hero”

It’s not that Carrie isn’t right. She is. Luke is way too busy with the band and his fame and everything around it. He doesn’t have time or room between those things for me. Not for an ordinary girl. Not for anyone. 

“So incredible Some kinda miracle That when it's meant to be, I'll become a hero, oh So I'll wait, wait, wait, wait for you”

Luke’s eyes meet mine as he hits that high note and his mouth curls up into that beautiful smile I’ve come to love. Once again, I’ve fallen in love with someone who would never reciprocate those feelings. If I don’t get out now, I’m going to get hurt. 

“Yeah I'll be a hero Cause I, I can be everything you need If you're the one for me, like gravity, I'll be unstoppable I, yeah I believe in destiny I may be an ordinary guy without his soul But if you're the one for me I'll be a hero Yeah, yeah I'll be a hero, yeah I'll be a hero Hero”

As the last notes of his song ring out into the night, I grab my still wet clothes and my keys Luke left on the dresser, and then leave the house. My heart breaks with every step I take, but I know it’s what’s best for me. It’s what’s best for both of us. There’s no room for me in his life. Like he said, he’s no superman, he can’t handle this many things at once. Not even a hero would be able to.  

Everything taglist:

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@hannahhistorian92 @marinettepotterandplagg @thequirkybookaholic @bookdealer5 @tenaciousperfectionunknown @hemmingsness @iainttakingshitfromnobody @ifilwtmfc @angryknightstatesmantrash @kiss-themoongoodbye @charliesmountains @thedarkqueenofavalon @calamitykaty @caitsymichelle13 @wiselight @kcd15 @vicesvsvirtuesfanfic @stars-soph @kinda-really-lost @notasofti @stellasmusa @n0wornever @kaitieskidmore1 @tefilovesreading @pxperphxntom @crybabyddl @crybabyddl @headheartbellarke @authentic-gillespie @happinessinthedarkesttimes @bright-molina @rangerelik @cordeliascrown @willex-owns-my-heart @fangirlangioma @frickin-bats @flower-name @jaskiers-sweetkiss @jandthephantoms @kelpwithawhy  @the-hufflepuff-hunter @lookingthroughmirrors @buckybarnesishot310 @echocharm17618 @littlemissaddict @mystic-writings @joynerxmercer @brooke0297 @magicalxdaydream @musicianspiritsblog @bexxy @ruvaitkevicius @whitetigerlover17 @stressyanddepressysimp  @talk-on-the-street @theolivekiddo @sunsetcurvej @teti-menchon0604 @candycornmgg @gray_jato

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TAGLIST |  MASTERLIST 

[bi-bard]

Picture Perfect - Winchester Brothers Imagine (Supernatural)

Title: Picture Perfect

Pairing: Winchester Brothers X Child!Reader

Requested: by @isatkj

Word Count: 1,356 words

Warning(s): mentions of death, potential violence.

Summary: (Around Season 8 or 9-ish) The perfect town... that wasn't supposed to exist. Now, Sam and Dean have to figure out what caused this city to suddenly pop up on the map.

Author's Note: I took so much inspiration from season 14, episode 15 because of the general vibe of the whole episode.

Hey! I did a rewrite of the ending of Supernatural. It took a really long time to complete, so it would mean a lot to me if you check it out. Here’s a link! (it’s on my personal account)

-----------------------------------

--Third P.O.V--

Dean pulled the impala up to an open gas pump. While his brother got the gas, Sam opened the passenger door so he could go over the facts.

"So, there have been strange occurrences around a small town about three hours outside of Seattle, Washington," Sam relayed. "Insiders rarely come out and the outsiders that go in don't usually get back out."

"No one's making a huge deal about this," Dean asked.

"Well, it's supposed to be an old ghost town," Sam explained. "But it's not. Functioning stores and living families."

"So, something has got this town up and running but the people in it are... what performing sacrifices," Dean asked.

"I don't know," Sam shrugged.

"How far out are we," Dean asked.

"A few more hours," Sam replied.

"Hold on boys," the brothers looked over to see Death standing in front of the car. "I have some information you need about this little town."

"And that is...," Sam asked after Death had trailed off.

"You shouldn't go in," the being replied. "The person running that town is incredibly dangerous. You'll be dead in moments. The residents won't let you get close enough to harm the child."

"The child," Dean noted.

"The child is raising the dead," Death continued. "This upsets the natural balance of things. The source must be removed."

"'The source' is a child," Sam argued. "You can't just kill a child."

"I can, and I will," Death just seemed to shrug.

"Do you know why this kid wants to bring people back," Dean asked. "Before you become an asshole and murder someone who hasn't even gotten to middle school?"

"Almost a year ago, the child lost both of their parents," Death explained. "That's when their powers first spiraled. It started with only their parents. It then spread, like a virus. Soon, a whole town was standing in a spot where there should be rubble."

"You're going to kill a kid that lost their family," Sam asked.

The brothers stared at Death in shock. Death seemed annoyingly unaffected. To him, this was the only way to put things back in order. To the boys, this was a clearly scared kid that went through the same pain that they did.

"You can't do this," Dean shook his head. "We won't let you."

"You don't have a choice-"

"Give us a chance," Sam snapped. "It's a kid. A scared kid. Give us a chance to talk to them. Just a chance."

"No."

"Come on!"

"I'll give you one chance," Death replied. "If you fail, I will finish the job."

As the word "job" was spoken, Death vanished from the boys' sight.

Sam and Dean jumped back into the impala and took off. What was supposed to be another three-hour drive was done in a little over two. Neither brother knew how they didn't get pulled over but they didn't care.

Dean pulled the car over to the curb.

"Woah," Dean mumbled as they got out.

It was the picture-perfect town. There was a small dinner, a library that was actually being used, cookie-cutter houses. Sam and Dean looked at each other.

Locals were looking at them as the brothers walked by.

"So, where do we find this kid," Dean asked.

"Well, look at the signs," Sam pointed at the businesses. Most of them had (Y/l/n) on their signs. "It's the most common name. If we can find that house, we can find the kid."

Everyone's house had little signs. It was very clear this town was designed by a child.

"Well, hello," a man walked up to the brothers.

"Hi," Dean said awkwardly.

"Can I ask why you boys have decided to visit our little town," the man asked.

The boys looked at each other for a moment.

"We were admiring the lovely houses," Sam lied. "We have been considering moving for a while and this town seems lovely."

"Well, there aren't any vacancies," the man replied.

"Oh, that's a shame," Sam shrugged. "Is there someone else we can talk to? A mayor or something? I don't want to insult you but maybe you missed something."

The man's smile dropped, "You can't go near them."

"Why," Dean asked.

"You'll hurt them," the man glared.

It was like that was a signal. All of the people on the street stopped, turning to stare at the brothers. The brothers looked all around them.

"We're not going to hurt them," Sam tried to explain. "We're trying to help."

"No," the man snapped. "You're trying to take us away."

When the man stepped forward, the brothers knew it was time to run. They sprinted down the street as almost a whole town chased them.

"Sam," Dean yelled, pointing at a house. "There, look at the sign!"

"(Y/l/n)'s house!" was written on the sign.

The brothers ran through the front door, locking it. No one banged on the door.

"They don't want to hurt (Y/n)," Sam said. "We should be safe here."

"Hello there," a man and woman walked out to see the brothers.

"The parents," Sam mumbled.

They looked up to the stairs when the floor creaked. There was a young kid standing up there.

"Hi, (Y/n)," Sam said softly, trying to keep from scaring the kid. "I'm Sam, this is my brother, Dean. We're here to help."

"Why," the kid asked. "I'm happy here. Everything was fixed."

"Do you know why," Sam asked. The child seemed confused at the idea that something caused this. "You brought them back, remember?"

"Don't," the dad said in anger. "You don't get to hurt (Y/n)."

"Sam," Dean mumbled.

One more shared look and the two took off. They ran up the stairs, the undead parents on their tails.

"I'm sorry," Sam mumbled, leading (Y/n) back into their room. Dean slammed the door, locking it and being ready to hold it shut.

"What are you doing," (Y/n) went to fight Sam, but obviously didn't get far.

"(Y/n)," Sam knelt down and grabbed (Y/n)'s shoulders. "You created this town. Your parents died and your powers went out of control. No one here is supposed to be alive."

"You're... You're lying," the child yelled, shaking her head. Dean leaned into the door when (Y/n)'s parents started banging on it.

"I know it's hard," Sam continued. "It's terrifying but you aren't going to be completely alone. Right now, you're putting yourself in danger. That's not good, is it?"

(Y/n) shook their head.

"I lost both my parents too," Sam said. "It's scary but you have to let these people go. They have to move on. I promise, they'll be much happier."

"I don't wanna be alone," the kid mumbled, tears falling down their face.

"You won't be," Sam promised. "Dean and I will make sure of that."

The banging stopped. Dean stood up straight again.

The cookie-cutter house faded. Instead of falling from the second floor like they should have, they were just on the ground by an old building, already crumbled and destroyed.

Sam pulled (Y/n) into a tight hug as the kid sobbed. Dean walked over to them. He and Sam shared a sad look. Sam slowly stood up, letting the kid hold his hand as they walked to the impala.

Death was waiting for them.

The brothers froze, Sam pushing (Y/n) behind him.

"Good job boys," Death complimented. "However, there's still a problem. The child doesn't have control over their powers."

"We can teach them," Dean argued. "We have enough experience with powers that we can help."

Death took a step forward.

Both the boys moved to be more in his way.

"Fine," Death stared at (Y/n), who was still hiding behind Sam. "I'll have my eye on you."

With that, Death disappeared again. (Y/n) stepped out from behind Sam.

"He's not very nice," the kid mumbled. The brothers couldn't help but chuckle. Understatement of the century.

"Come on, kid," Dean nodded toward the car. "Let's make sure we have a comfortable place for you to sleep for the night."

The boys didn't expect to leave the town with a kid but it definitely wasn't the weirdest hunt they had been on.

-----------------------------------

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[refinedbuffoonery]

Quarantine Moments (14)

Soooooo this started as me vibing to a Halsey song and then it turned into angst. Oops. Sorry. 

Also, in case you missed the announcement earlier this week, this is the last QM. I’ve had so much fun writing these, but it’s time to move on to new things. :)

*****

It’s a quiet night in the MacGyver household. 

Mac lays on the couch, practicing the ukulele. Bozer and Riley are in their respective rooms, doing their own thing. As much as he loves them, Mac has to admit it’s nice having some alone time. 

His fingers land on the wrong strings, and the resulting chord grates on his ears. 

Progress is coming slowly, to say the least. 

Riley shuffles into the kitchen and fills a glass of water for herself. Using her presence as an excuse to pause his increasingly frustrating playing, Mac studies Riley’s posture. Her shoulders cave inward, and she shifts her weight back and forth, from one leg to the other. When Riley turns around, Mac notices the heavy expression in her eyes. 

Something is wrong. 

They hold eye contact for a few seconds, saying nothing. It’s almost as if Riley is trying to convey her thoughts without actually speaking. 

Mac wishes he could understand her. Usually he can. But this look...he can’t pinpoint what it means. 

“C’mon,” Riley beckons. “Let’s go for a drive.” 

Mac frowns, checking the time. “Now? It’s almost ten.” 

“Let’s go,” she repeats. Crossing the distance to the couch, Riley lowers her voice. “Bozer needs some space. I accidentally walked in on him while he was on the phone.” The heavy look in her eyes suddenly makes sense. 

“His mom?” 

“Mac—” Riley lowers her gaze. “She’s...she’s not doing well.” 

“Fuck,” he curses under his breath, sitting up. Bozer’s mom is the closest thing Mac has to a mother. She certainly raised him like he was her own. 

Riley squeezes his shoulder reassuringly. “I’ll drive. Does your truck have gas? Mine’s almost out.” 

Still thinking about Bozer’s mom, Mac almost doesn’t hear her. “Yeah,” he belatedly stutters. Closing his eyes and taking a few deep, steadying breaths, Mac pulls on a pair of sneakers and follows Riley out the door. 

It feels good to leave the house.

Riley winds her way through the city streets, turning periodically but generally heading west. Mac’s beach playlist plays softly through the speakers. The roads are empty, which still shocks Mac even after two months of lockdown. Even late at night, there’s usually people on the road. The eerie stillness of his city is unnerving. It’s usually pulsing with life, not...whatever this is. 

A ghost-town, perhaps. Haunted by the memory of the diverse, vibrant beings that once inhabited it. 

“Did you hear anything else?” he asks, referring to Bozer’s phone call. 

Regret flashes in Riley’s eyes. “No. I left as soon as I realized who he was talking to.” 

After a few more turns, they’re in a part of town Mac isn’t familiar with, and he can’t stop himself from asking, “Where are you taking me?” He knows the difference between Riley aimlessly driving and when she has a destination in mind, and this is definitely the latter. 

“My spot.” 

.

They end up at the beach. 

Riley rolls down her window partway, and the smell of saltwater and seaweed wafts in on the gentle breeze. The lights of a ship glimmer in the distance; it’s big, maybe a cargo ship or an aircraft carrier. 

There’s something soothing about being near the ocean, Mac thinks, like all his troubles will be washed out to sea with the receding tide. 

There’s a lot he’d like to wash away.

Mac exhales with each wave's retreat, letting his thoughts and emotions go with it, one by one. After a few minutes, Mac feels lighter than he has in days. "Thanks for getting me out of the house," he says. "I know it wasn't your intention, but I needed this."

"You're welcome." Riley glances at him and looks away, biting her lip. Something flickers in her eyes, just for a second, but it’s gone before Mac can figure out what it is. 

“So, I heard a good joke today,” Mac says. 

“Oh really? Where’d you hear it?” 

“On my run. The teenage boys on the corner were practicing their stand-up comedy routine in the front yard again.” 

Riley smiles. “Let’s hear it.” 

Mac takes a deep breath, mentally preparing himself so he doesn’t start laughing before he lands the punchline. “What did the fish say when it hit the wall?” 

Riley makes a show of thinking for a second. “I don’t know. What?” 

“Dam.” 

Riley tips her head back and laughs, the sound loud and full of life. Tendrils of warmth curl in Mac’s insides, taking up residence in the shadowed corners of his soul. He’s been thinking about that joke all day, waiting for the right moment to tell her. 

Because Riley is the first person he wanted to tell, not Bozer or Desi or anyone else. 

Just Riley. 

She’s still laughing as her gaze catches his, and her raw, unguarded expression sends a chill down Mac’s spine. 

Sometimes Mac lets himself think about what it could be like if that wall between them wasn’t there. 

She’d consume him, in every way possible. And he’d gladly let her. 

But that wall is there. It’s been there since the day they met, and Mac respects her too much to poke holes in it. Maybe it’s a good thing. With the wall there to block sparks and fireworks, they developed a quiet rhythm of love and care, and Mac wouldn’t trade that for the world. 

If he let himself love her, really love her, there would be no going back from that, no returning to the way things are now. Either they’d be it for each other—be the one—or they’d wreck each other too thoroughly to ever be just friends again. So even if the wall came down, in a future where Desi is out of the picture, Mac would think twice before crossing that line with Riley. 

And he knows she would too. 

But that wall is there, Mac reminds himself again, and he and Desi are trying to make their relationship work. And as for Riley...

Riley will always be the “what if” he never got the chance to answer. 

Mac can live with that. He doesn’t have a choice, really. 

*****

Riley didn’t think about where was going. She just let her hands and feet take her where she needed to go, and it’s only in the comfortable quiet after Mac tells his stupid joke that Riley realizes what she’s done. 

“I’ve never taken anyone here before,” she confesses suddenly. Riley found this lesser-known beach access point in high school, not long after getting her driver’s license. Her spot has always been a quiet place she could escape to when she needed to avoid the real world for a while. It has always been there for her—when Riley was mad or sad or frustrated, or when she just needed some alone time to think. 

Mac snaps his head up in surprise. “Really?” 

“Yeah.” Riley looks away. She wants to tell him, but she can’t bring herself to do it while he’s looking at her like that. “Though, I almost took Aubrey here once.” 

“What stopped you?” 

“I chickened-out at the last minute. I thought I was ready to share it with him, but there was this little voice in my head telling me to keep this place to myself. So I kept driving. I parked in the lot a couple miles south and said that was my spot.” Riley avoids thinking about what it might mean that she didn’t think twice about bringing Mac.

There’s a long pause, and then Mac says, “Thank you for sharing this with me. You didn’t have to. And for the record, even if you had told me about your spot, I never would’ve asked you to bring me here if you didn’t want to.” 

It takes a couple tries to swallow the lump in her throat. “I think Aubrey knew I was lying,” Riley deflects. “So I made out with him long enough for him to forget, and he never brought it up later.” She picks at her nails. The dark gray polish is chipping; she’ll have to repaint them soon. “That was the only thing I ever lied to him about. Besides work stuff, of course. And we know how that turned out.” 

The stench of seaweed and decay fills her nostrils. Riley focuses on it—anything to distract her from the scent of Mac’s laundry detergent. It’s plagued her ever since moving in with him after breaking up with Aubrey. The scent she’s long associated with safety and her friend—and now the person she has unrequited feelings for—follows her everywhere, since her clothes smell like it too. Most days Riley can ignore it, but sometimes....sometimes it feels like torture. 

And right now, at her special spot, in his truck, wearing clothes that smell like him, it all feels like a mockery of what Riley wants and can never have. 

Once, just this once, she lets herself imagine it anyway. 

They’re on another drive, just like this one. It starts with stolen glances, then she switches to driving with one hand so the other can rest innocently on the center console, and soon enough, Mac’s fingers slip between hers. 

Then they’re parked at Riley’s spot, and his lips are on her neck, trailing light kisses across her throat. They get a little carried away, marking skin and untucking shirts, and a murmured Let’s get out of here has Riley speeding home so they can continue this in private. 

Riley shivers. Taking a deep breath, she tucks the fantasy into the far corner of her mind for safe keeping. Riley knows she should just let it go. There’s only so long she can sit in the silence, waiting for a sign and wondering if kissing him would really ruin everything they already have. 

Riley finally dares to glance at Mac again. He’s already looking at her, still wearing that soft expression from before. It’s enough to make her wonder, what if? 

What if he’s everything she ever wanted? 

But what if she loses everything instead? 

[atinysunbaby]

Meant to be | Choi San 🖤

Warnings : Cursing, violence, mention of rape.

Words count : 2.2 k

Previous 《 Prologue

Masterlist

Chapter 1

Present

My cheeks are burning from the salty tears escaping my eyes. A tightening feeling in my chest growing by the minute. The sobs keep escaping me, making my body move uncontrollably. Chocking from the sharp inhales and shaking from the cold temperature. This moment, forever will be imprinted in my mind. Those images I wish I could forget, unfortunately will hunt me till my last breath.

I suppose it's what most people feel too when they lose their parents. I wanted to deny it, but I saw their bodies. They were cold, bruised, bloody and no longer held any signs of life.

The last time a saw them, I didn't bother much to say goodbye to them. Only telling them to enjoy their little vacation in the woods. I was more exited about being alone then making them know how much I loved them. Now it's too late, I'll never be able to see their faces again, hear their voices, feel their arms around me when I need them the most.

I woke up to my cellphone ringing this morning, answering grumpily, thinking it was my mom who disturbed me from my sleep. It was actually the cops telling me to come to the hospital, but I wish it would've been her instead. I wish she could annoy me every morning now, but it's over. She isn't here anymore and neither is my dad.

I'm in my room, at this moment, crying my heart out. I ran out of the hospital immediately after seeing their corpses. They wanted me to identifie them, but I left with people screaming for me to comeback. I guess they probably know from my reaction, that it was indeed my mom and dad.

People keep calling me on my phone, but I don't answer. I'm laying on the floor, looking at the ceiling, waiting for my sadness to subside. I know that won't happen anytime soon, but it's the only way for me to calm down. Being surrounded by people telling me how sorry they are for my loss. A bunch of fake assholes making me feel even worse about the situation definitely won't make anything better.

Slowly my eyes get heavy, I try to fight the exhaustion but fail miserably. I fall asleep on the cold floor of my room, my window open and the sound of rain filling my ears. All of this crying definitely used up a lot of my energy.

The car crash, I wasn't there and I have no idea of what happened. But I see it, something is in the middle of the road and dad just told mom a joke. They're laughing.. until they hit that thing, an animal maybe. It goes right through the window and kill my dad instantly, but as for my mom. The car rolls off the road and fall down a small cliff. Mom's still alive, she's in pain, blood everywhere, she's crying for her husband to open his eyes and answer her. She keeps screaming that she can't feel him anymore? His presence? Her breathing is getting worse the more she panics. Suddenly the door on her side opens and something stabs her in the chest, putting a end to her desperate cries. Blood is streaming down her chin, her eyes looking directly through mine while she takes her last breath.

I open my eyes to see nothing but darkness. I frantically search for a sign of light, I reach around with my hands. My eyes are open wide and my breath shaky, until my fingers brush against an object. I stop every movement, slowly gripping it and letting a breath of relieve when I realise it's my phone.

I turn it on to see a ton of messages and missed calls. One standing out, my aunts name, my mom's sister. I never talked to her, but mom insisted on giving me her number. I look around my room and stand up to look outside the window, only to notice that it's night time. The reason of the darkness and freezing temperature. I close it and turn the lights on in my room. Then I sit on the corner of my bed and hesitate a few minutes while looking at the screen in front of me. My fingers finaly press on call. A few rings later, Aunt Kath's voice is heard. "Y/N! Y/N is it you?"

"Yes it's me.. why did you cal-" I'm cut off by a loud sob. My eyes widen in confusion, but I soon remember that my mom, her sister is no longer a part of this world. I sigh and wait for her to stop crying on the other side of the line. "S-sweetie- where are you? Are you safe? You're not alone ar-"

"Kath, my parents just died. I'm obviously not partying right now, but I'm okay.. I guess.." She stays silent for the next few seconds, my blunt answer probably wasn't expected, but it's understandable. "Sweetheart-I uhh.. you have no one to stay with right? So.. your mom made me your godmother, i-in case anything happened to her.. will you come live w-with me, here in Korea?"

It takes some time to process what just came out of her mouth, my eyebrows are furrowed. Many feelings are fighting to take control of my body, but the one that wins is frustration. "W-what?.."

"She told me to take care of you if she wasn't there anymore... It was just a precaution, but I guess it really happened." She says with a small voice, trying not to upset me further. Judging from my lack of response, she can tell I'm not that excited about this new information. "I asked you, but it ins't really a choice that you have. It's an obligation, you can't stay alone out ther-"

I hang up, not wanting to listen even for one more second. I need some time to think about it. She's right, I don't have much of a choice. I turned seventeen not too long ago and I don't have any family member here. At least none that I know of. I sigh defeated, once again pressing on my godmother's contact.

She picks up not even a second later, as if she knew I was gonna call her back. She doesn't say a word, waiting for me to start talking. I clear my throat after freeing my lower lip from my teeth. "How will I get there? How about my clothes and everything else in the house? My parents' funera-"

"I'll take care of everything you don't have to worry, just bring the necessary and I'll transfer some money on your account so you can pay for your plane ticket. As for the ride to my house, my boyfriend will pick you up" She spend a whole hour explaining to me how everything will go and I agree after hesitating for a while. If my mom gave Kath the role of godmother, she must trust her. So I will trust her too, anyways I don't really have a reason not to. She's been nice till now and she'll even welcome me in her house, she's taking me in. "Thank you Kath, I really appreciate it. I don't know what I would've done if I was all alone."

Days later

I prepared all my stuff, ready to fly to Korea. It took me a while to accept, but eventually I warmed up to it. It's an opportunity for me, to start over. A new life full of adventure, new environment and culture. I want to explore the world so why not start there.

Unfortunately though, I had to say goodbye to all my friends. We cried and spend the last few days together. We promised to text each other everyday and not to forget about one another. Sad thing is, my friends aren't the only ones I need to leave behind. It's hard to leave the place I grew up in, my house, my neighbourhood, my city, everything.

In a few hours, everything I ever knew will all be in the past. Only the memories will stay, the rest, all gone. So the day my parents died, I didn't only lose them, but my life too. The life they gave me. Now, I have to make a new one, by myself.

Landing in Korea

The flight was boring and quite annoying, I didn't know what to do. A baby cried for what felt like years and a couple had an argument at some point. Then the person next to me started to snore so loudly I thought the plane was crashing. I'm glad to finaly be on the ground, the loud voices of people speaking indistinctly seeming to sooth me from what I went through previously.

I sit on one of the chairs in the airport waiting for James, my godmother's boyfriend. He'll drive me to their house, apparently Kath arranged a room for me already. She doesn't have any kid, so she's looking forward to having me over.

"Y/N!!" I jump from the chair almost falling on my ass. I luckily manage to stay on my two feet and not make a fool of myself. Upon hearing a chuckle, I turn around and see an old looking dude smirking at me, maybe in his late forties. "Umm.. Hi can I help you?"

"James, I came to pick you up remember?" He asks while pointing at himself. I'm still unsure, he's looking at me weirdly. I can feel an odd vibe from him. It makes me feel uncomfortable, but I push it aside and nod before following him.

We enter his rusty jeep, the doors creaking when moving. Despite the outside looking a bit ugly, the inside is clean. The only negative point would be the smell, cigarette and..alcohol? Paying a bit more attention to the smell though, it doesn't only come from the jeep. The man next to me is even worst, it seems that he might shower rarely. Subtly, I bring my sweater paws to my nose, looking outside to distract myself.

"So, Y/N! How you holding up?" His loud and deep raspy voice makes me jump for the second time. I turn a bit a towards him not to be impolite and think before answering him. "I guess it's a bit easier then I expected. I didn't think that I'd feel any better, but after a few days it prove me wrong. But I feel bad, to already move on.."

He hums next to me, nodding his head lazily. I wait for him to add something, but the car is filled with silence. I'm relieved he doesn't speak further, not really being in the mood to have a whole conversation, especially with someone I don't know. So, slowly I turn back around towards the window. My mind drifting to the events that happened in just a few weeks, everything is so fucked up. Fortunately, Kath and James decided to help me.

About an hour past since we came out of the airport. We just entered a forrest, James informed me that it'll take a while still. He insisted that I should go to sleep and when I'll wake up, we'll be home. I ponder for some time, but eventually agree. It doesn't take long for me to fall asleep due to not being able to get much sleep in the plane.

I wake up when the car come to an halt, a man's voice coming from next to me. Curses escaping his mouth, confused I open my eyes. The events from the previous hours coming back to me, tears threatening to escape my eyes. My body shaking slightly from fear, uncontrollably.

The ride was a lot longer then what James had told me it would be and I slept, only to be woken up by a hand covering my mouth. Horrible things happened in that car and it wasn't a nightmare, no mather how much I wish it was one. He said he would tell Kath it took us some time because of the traffic and the airport. Then he threatened to kill me if I open my mouth.

I can't let him see me crying, I don't want him to have another reason to hurt me. Despite being terrified and completely drained from energy, I swallow the bill in my throat and wipe the tears from my eyes. While I'm breaking down, next to me James is whistling and turning the car off. Announcing with a loud scream to Kath that we arrived.

"Omg! Y/N! Sweetie you really are here." Kath comes out of the house shouting happily, her arms open, waiting for me to give her a hug. I rush to open the door, but a hand grabs my arm. His nails dig in my skin and I whimper, both from fear and pain. "Remember. You talk, you die."

He puts my bag in my hand, pretending to be helping me. Finally I escape the horrible vehicle and run into my godmother's arms with a heavy heart. The second she engulfs me in her warmth, sobs spill from deep within me. She cries with me but not for the same reason. She cries because she lost her sister and now I'm here. I, cry because I've lost my parents, I lost my house, my friends. Because I've been raped less then an hour ago. Because I feel completely broken and hopeless. The new life I wanted for myself, only starts with even more problems then I had before.

Next 》 Chapter 2

[theficplug]

Swipe Right

Tyler Lepley x Black Reader 

warnings : none, mostly fluff with just a tiny bit of smut if you can call it that at the end. i’m not too familiar with him but i tried ! to the cutie who requested, i hope you like it. alright enjoy x  Face mask on. Wine in hand. Impulsive 10$ Dark and Lovely hair dye bought at the beauty supply store already slathered in your hair. It was your time set aside out of the week for you and your best friend to complain. Although homegirl was on the other end of the phone getting ready for anniversary and was not relating to your rant of the night. 

 “Girl, I’m telling y’all right now if I get another unsolicited dick pic in my dms or another “You got the bill right? I’m just a lil in between jobs right now you know how it is right baby”? I’m joining a nunnery because I love love, but me and my bank account can NOT keep getting played like this.” you rant to your friends over a video call as you walk around your apartment tending to the foils in your hair. 

The series of failed dates and “talking stages” had left a sour taste in your mouth and put you off from dating altogether, but your best friend Layla is trying to convince you to give Tinder another go. 

“I don’t know Lala. I just don’t have another talking stage in me. I’m grown in the words of the iconic Miss New York Tiffany Pollard : I want eggs CRACKED AND SCRAMBBBLLEEDD” 

Layla’s husband Aaron’s laughter erupted from somewhere in the room on her end and you raise an eyebrow not knowing that he had been ear hustling the whole time. 

“Just give a little more time. You never know what can be right around the corner!  There has got to be at least a few foine men on Tinder. Give it one more try.” Layla encouraged before saying that she had to go because her man had the night planned for their anniversary dinner. 

You huffed and sat the phone aside as you waited for the copper coloured hair dye to process your curiosity got the better of you and you reached for your phone again.

As you thumbed through the profiles of folks “looking for a beautiful girl for me and my husband (:” and “if you a feminist, pay for our first date”. You were two seconds away from putting your phone to the side again before you noticed “Tyler Lepley” and his profile.

You nearly spit out the cheap bottle of Stella Rose on your carpet in disbelief. “No, this has got to be a whole ass catfish. Why would his fine ass be on Tinder of all places? Let’s humour him. Wait but he’s verified... At the very least this should be funny as hell.” you say to yourself before rolling your eyes. 

“Okay and I definitely got to make some single friends cause I’m really home on a Saturday night talking to myself. . . Whatever-” 

You swipe right on his profile and almost instantly your phone notified you that there was a match. 

‘Hey I just wanted to let you know I think you’re beautiful and if you’re ever in the area I’d like to take you out sometime. On me of course.’

“Oh he’s good.” you thought to yourself as you tried to think of a reply.

‘Sure, I’d love to. I’m actually driving up to Atlanta tomorrow for work. And if it’s really you. I want a Tika Sumpter autograph when we meet lol.’ you respond having a little fun with the troll at least before you log out for the evening. 

‘Oh, so you don’t think it’s me? I ain’t nobody big. Just tryna find the right one to bring home for the holidays so my nosey aunties can stop asking me when I’m gon get a wife lol.’

*attachment (1)*

“Pfft.. Anybody could’ve gotten that from Instagram or something.” you said to yourself. 

He’s good though. You’ll give him that much. 

‘Okay tattoos and lips! You’re handsome or whatever.That’s understandable. I’m looking for the same thing but I must be looking in all the wrong places cause if i run into one more dud that’s looking for a unicorn for them and their wife to “share”. Whew- it’s a lot lol.’

‘I get you. I haven’t matched with too many women on here myself. They either tryna see how they can get a job at the studio or they want me to be their sugar daddy. Which I ain't got no problem wining and dining my women btw. I’m just not looking for that kinda situationship. If you don’t mind I’d like to video call you cause looking as good as you look. I'm just tryna make sure you’re not a catfish.”

Hold up. This was just supposed to be a little fun and now this man is using the video call function on Tinder and you’re still sitting there with the dye on your head. 

‘Give me 25 minutes.’ you respond quickly before he replies with ‘take your time’.

The race was on as you began running around like a chicken with it’s head cut off as you wash out the dye quickly and inspect the colour. It was a really pretty natural ginger shade as you grab your hair diffuser and blow out your hair a little to dry it the best you could. 

After grabbing your makeup bag , you slap on the winged liner, a little highlighter, mascara, and a dark brown lipstick like you were back in school trying to get ready before class. 

You fluff and shake out your hair while looking at yourself in the mirror. With 5 minutes to spare you go to your closet and pull out a cozy warm brown cropped jumper that really stood out against your deep skin tone. 

“Alright, please don’t waste my time.” you whisper to yourself as you press the video call button and wait for him to come onto the screen. After about a minute and no answer you let out a heavy sigh feeling a little embarrassed and like a fool for actually believing that The Universe was about to hook you up like that. 

You put your phone on the table next to you and leaned back in the chair before hearing the notification go off again. 

After going back and forth about it for a few seconds you hesitantly answered the call and had to contain the array of emotions you were going through when you saw him actually on the phone, smiling at you with those pretty ass white teeth. 

You put the phone for a second before letting out a ‘thank you Jesus’.

“I should be saying the same thing about you! You are beautiful. God damn. When I first saw your profile I was like man aint no way. She gotta be some sort of catfish or something. I thought at the most it would be a funny cover story tomorrow on The Shade Room or something. ‘Tyler Lepley Catfished By Tinder Boo’. I apologize for not answering your call earlier. I just wrapped on set and I wanted to be able to hear you and give you my undivided attention. How are you this evening?” he says chuckling deeply and softly as he sits back in his trailer. 

“I was thinking the same thing. I’m like at least it’ll humour me, but I wasn’t really expecting you to want to talk. How are you? I was completely kidding about the whole Tika Sumpter thing by the way.” You say giggling nervously before fussing about with the window to try and get better lighting. 

“Oh really? Cause i got her to sign this shirt for you and everything. I can just do a giveaway with it or something else. I like your hair by the way...I’m doing good. It’s been a long day of pretending to get my ass kicked and running lines but I’m grateful to be in even better company with your pretty self. Even if it is through the screen for now. There’s something about a woman like you. I feel like I wanna know everything.” he compliments and flatters you and it’s taking your mind a while to process that this is not some extreme episode of Punk’d.

“YOU DID NOT! Of course I want the shirt. I was just fronting cause I didn’t wanna seem like that’s the only reason why I wanted to talk to you. Also, thank you. You just seem like someone who’s got his shit together and I really like that. At this stage in life people think I move too fast or that my standards are too high. I think it’s just because I know what I want. I want to be married, I want to be happy and comfortable. I eventually would really like to have kids. I want to have kids young so that I can have even more time loving them and my own little family..” you don’t like to waste time with the small talk. That’s nice too but you like to get straight to the point so that you’ll know if your views on life are aligned. 

And just like that you two begin to connect instantly . You talked and talked for hours from the time he left his trailer to drive home and halfway into the night.

You actually ended up falling asleep on the phone with him because neither one of you wanted to hang up. 

Scheduling conflicts prevented you from meeting up with him the next day but of course that didn’t stop either of you from constantly just wanting to hear from each other. 

4 weeks later after non stop talking and sending pictures and videos of your day when you couldn’t talk to each other. Both of your schedules lined up perfectly and you ended up meeting in Atlanta. 

You met him at a little cozy cafe and he held the prettiest bouquet of scarlet roses in one hand and a coffee for you in the other while standing with a huge smile etched across his face. 

“Hey handsome” you say to him before leaning in to hug him but was not expecting the peck to the lips. 

Even though you’ve discussed it and you’re both “if the vibe is right fun is not off the table” kind of people. 

You kiss his soft plump lips back and thank him for the flowers. Of course given the part of the city that you were in, he was recognized almost immediately by the barista.

“My mama and auntie love your show.They both got me into it too. We thought they were gonna kill you off this season! I was scared for you. If you don't mind, can i have a picture?’ The woman named Ericka asks as she moves from behind the desk .

“Hey Ericka, thank you. I appreciate it, of course.” He replied warmly to her before looking over at you to double check if you’re okay with everything. 

You awkwardly move to the side so that he can have his photo with the giggling fan already batting her eyelashes at him. 

He softly grabs your hand to keep you close to him and shakes his head. He’s lowkey clingy in the cutest way as he moves you behind him so that you aren’t in the photo and wraps your arms around his waist before flashing a smile at the fans phone.

“Thank you so much and you are so pretty!” She says to you before trying to quickly hustle back to work in the quiet slow moving coffee shop. 

“Me? Look at you and your pretty self ! I like your braids too!” You respond sweetly as Tyler beams with pride while watching you interact with the fan. 

“Sorry about all of that” he leans down to whisper in your ear before walking with you out of the coffee shop. 

“I don’t know about you but I ain't even gon’ lie I’m nervous as hell. I’ve been spending the last two weeks trying to figure out the best ways to spoil the hell outta you. I just think you’re incredible. From your story about all that you’ve been through to just like you. I ain’t ever had this before.” he admits and it throws you a little that he was the one nervous to meet you.  

“Nervous to meet me? Tyler, you meet about 50 different beautiful women a day. I’m not saying I’m not the shit cause I am. But no need for nervousness here. I think you’re probably the most down to Earth famous person I’ve met dude. A lot of them are real snotty when I style them and stuff. Just completely out of touch…You’re always busy doing something and I’m always working on something. How about we just do nothing? What’s your favourite way to do nothing?” I get all of my favourite foods and snacks and then I just watch all of my comfort movies and shows and forget about everything going wrong with the world even if just for a little bit.” you admit and he nods along before opening the car door for you.

The entire car ride there wasn’t an awkward moment or any tension hanging in the air. The conversation flowed smoothly all the way from the supermarket to the restaurants for to-go plates, and to his home there. 

There were plates of food of every kind of food you mention from pad thai to sushi, to indian food, mexican, and a plate of soul food cause you couldn’t visit Atlanta and not try some bomb ass soul food while you were there. Not to mention the snacks that you both also picked out. 

He had convinced you that you two should build a blanket fort and he broke out the candles setting the perfect atmosphere for the storm settling in. 

Something about the rain soothed you both as you fell over each laughing and talking about nothing and everything.  

“Okay so let me ask you would have rather been on Fear Factor or Supermarket Sweep? Because this is important. I’d have to go with Supermarket Sweep because I’d rather bust my ass on tv than be in a crate full of cockroaches or something like that. I would freak the fuck out. They was wylin in 2001” you say and Tyler ponders the question for a minute before letting out a pfft.. 

“Easyyyyyy. I will drink the cockroach milkshake over playing on Supermarket sweep. I don’t mess with grocery stores like that. That’s why I order all my stuff online now. I've spent two many of my Saturdays missing Saturday morning cartoons walking around with my grandma and mama while me and my dad trail behind trying to get them to hurry up. Besides skydiving is on my list to do at some point.” he explains and you pretend to gag as he says that he’d take the shake. 

“Good?” he asked with a little laugh as he noticed you had a whipped cream mustache from the caramel hot chocolate that he made for you. 

“Mhm” was the only response he got from you in between swigs of possibly the best caramel hot chocolate you’ve ever had. 

He leans in,  licking it off of your lips before kissing you sweetly and gently tugging on your bottom lip as his tongue runs across it again. 

“I bet you taste better though…” he says against your lips

His hands find your hips as he pulls you onto his lap. 

You learned that he was talented at several things outside of acting and being inside out beautiful and a good 8- . Anyways, something you couldn’t tell your girls about on Monday.

Leaving him was too difficult two days later because you’re both those types of people where if you know , you know that you’ve found your person and both agreed to try and meet each other twice a week. Once for sure so that you try not to miss each other too much. 

Maybe swiping right wasn’t so bad after all.

[unedited so if there’s a few typos i’m sorry i’ll edit them later! ]

[georgiasfm]

╰  ･ﾟ. * 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐆𝐄𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐈𝐀 𝐂𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐀𝐘 ;

[ scarlett leithold, cis female, she/her ] have you seen GEORGIA CALLOWAY lately ? yeah, i heard they're TWENTY TWO years old and a REALITY TV STAR/PODCAST HOST now in charleston city. i mean, i don’t know if it’s their LEO vibes or that they’re -OBSTINATE and -CAPRICIOUS but also +GREGARIOUS and +EMPYREAN but they remind me of MIND GAMES by BANKS. here’s to hoping they don’t cause too much trouble around here. 

hey besties ! i’m ley , i’m 20 ( well .... i will be at midnight ) , i go by she / her pronouns , and i’m livin’ in the est timezone ! i unfortunately have a super busy weekend bc it’s my birthday , so i won’t be able to be around as much as i want to be. but i’m gonna do my best to as active as possible ! thankfully i wrote this intro ahead of time so for once it isn’t a complete disaster ( it’s still not good tho so don’t have high expectations ) anyways , here’s miss georgia calloway !! 

𝐈  . 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬  :

FULL NAME  :  georgia belle calloway .       AGE  :  twenty - two  .   DATE OF BIRTH  :  july 23rd . ASTROLOGY SIGNS  :  leo sun , aquarius moon , pisces ascendant .   GENDER  : cis woman  .   PRONOUNS  :  she / her / hers  .   SEXUALITY  :  bisexual .       MOTHER  :  diane calloway  :  former pageant  &  debutante queen turned stay at home mom / trophy wife .   FATHER  :  jack calloway  :  career politician  &  mayor of charleston .  SIBLINGS  :  georgia is the middle child of five kids . two older brothers , two younger sisters .  POSITIVE TRAITS  :  gregarious  ,  vehement  ,  alluring  , venturesome  ,  empyrean , altruistic  . NEGATIVE TRAITS  :  obstinate  ,  reticent  ,  flighty  ,  temerarious  ,  capricious  .   AESTHETICS  :  the patter of raindrops against glass windows , the lingering scent cigarettes mixed with sweet perfume , drinking honey whiskey out of red solo cups ,  watching constellations with exhausted eyes , sneaking out by means of the vine trellis , leaving texts unanswered for days , a box of pageant awards hidden away in the closet , secrets that weigh more than gold on cherry stained lips , bending every rule just enough to get away with it , wrinkled white satin dresses and knee high ruffled socks , one too many bottomless mimosas at brunch , hearts drawn on fogged glass mirrors , lollipop stained lips . CHARACTER INSPO  :  brooke davis ( one tree hill ) , sarah cameron ( obx ) , lux lisbon ( the virgin suicides ) , jackie burkhart ( that 70s show ) . 

click here for a quick trip to her pinterest bc it describes her better than i ever could !!

( tw ; infidelity , death , drunk driving )

𝐈𝐈 .  𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝  :

       from the second she was born , georgia was treated as her mother’s little doll. diane had been ecstatic the day she found out she was with child for the second time , and even more ecstatic to find out she would be having their first little girl. she was dressed up in pink dresses and frilly socks , shown off to all of the women country or her mother’s weekly book club nights. she was the apple of her parent’s eyes , until she wasn’t. with brunette tresses  &  honey brown eyes , georgia was adored by everyone .... her beauty noted with claims that she would grow up to be a heartbreaker. her mother thrived on the compliments ; the subtle reminders to what her own childhood had been like. she had always planned on having a little girl that she could do pageants with just like she had with her own mother , and darling little georgia was perfect for that. at such a young age , georgia fell in love with the pageants. she thrived in the spotlight , with all eyes on her. and just like her mother , she won every competion she was entered in , until she didn’t. by the age of nine , georgia was starting to grow bored of the constant pageants and recitals , wanting to explore other interests. by that point , diane’s interest in her had worn off and moved onto the next child , a five year old with beautiful blonde curls and dimpled cheeks. georgia grew to know the subtle ache of rejection , and from that day forward , did everything she could to win back her mother’s affection. 

      from the outside , the calloway’s came off as the picture perfect family. but from the inside ? things were quite the opposite. georgia’s parents had unmeetable expectations for their children. get perfect grades , nothing below a b acceptable. sit down , look pretty , and shut up. don’t cause a scandal. their love was entirely conditional , only being shown when their was something they believed deserved rewarding. if you were to ask georgia , she wouldn’t be able to tell you the last time her mother actually hugged her for genuine reasons , and not to manipulate her into doing what she wanted. their father was rarely home , always away working or traveling for work. it became obvious that he was having an affair –– multiple affairs , but diane just looked the other way. the calloway family was very prominent in charleston , especially with her father being elected mayor , and their was nothing that diane would allow to ruin their image. even if it cost her own happiness.

       things got considerably more difficult around the calloway home when georgia was sixteen. her eldest brother had gone out for a night of fun with a group of friends , and made the fatal mistake of getting into a car with someone who was far too drunk to drive. georgia will never forget the conversation she overheard from the living room that night ; “ they were drunk. lost control of the vehicle. died on impact. ” it tore the family apart , dividing them even more than they already were. georgia couldn’t stand the silence of her home after her brother’s death. so she started partying constantly , going on 48 hour benders and staying out long past her curfew. she couldn’t even recognize herself in the mirror. gone was their innocent little girl , the apple of their eyes. even this couldn’t get the attention of her parents , they barely even noticed she was gone most of the time ; all they did was yell at her to not make them look like fools. 

        for her whole life , georgia followed her parent’s rules. after graduating high school , she was expected required to go college and get a degree , but georgia just couldn’t be bothered. this is the one time she went against her parent’s wishes. her fear of being stuck here forever , with the same life as her parents ; a husband that doesn’t love her and miserable children , won out over the need for approval from her parents. so she ran off to la , and landed herself on love island usa after being approached by a producer. georgia is reality tv gold , and quickly became a fan favorite. her most memorable moment being after she got her heart broken on live tv , when she purposely held up a lighter to set off fire alarms ; and then laid on the ground getting drenched by the sprinklers. so now she’s single again after being made a fool of in front of the world , back home with parents that hate her for bringing them unwanted attention , and stuck in the city she tried to get away from. but , she’s got a podcast. it’s called the bimbo summit and it’s pretty much the only thing bringing her joy right now. it started as a way for her to expose some behind the scenes shit from love island , but now it’s just for fun. 

𝐈𝐈𝐈 .  𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲  :

georgia is the girl that’s not easy to forget. she’s outgoing and amiable , but stubborn and not easy to push over. she was the one that moms would warn their kids to stay away from in high school ; she leaves a trail of destruction wherever she goes , no matter how hard she tries not to. she has the purest of intentions , genuinely just wanting love  &  happiness for herself and everyone around her , but it seems like the universe has different plans. 

she almost has this air of melancholy surrounding her ? like even when she’s happy and smiling , you can still sense it or see in her eyes that she’s not truly happy 

very charismatic , she’s a major people pleaser so she’ll put everyone else’s feelings before her own . she just wants everyone to be happy even if it means she ends up being miserable . 

georgia’s a selective oversharer . she’ll tell you all these useless little facts so you think she’s opening up when in reality you don’t truly know her because she refuses to talk about the things that matter . 

she’s trusting once she gets to know someone , but if you break that trust even once she’s not very quick to forgive. she’ll hear you out , but it’s unlikely that she’ll ever let you back in. 

she is completely unhinged. somehow picks the worst possible decision every time a problem arises. she’s not much of a logical thinker , and tends to let her heart make decisions for her. it’s gotten her into a world of trouble one too many times , and yet she’s never learnt her lesson. 

she’s also a serial dater. in her pea brain attention = love so she’ll flock to wherever she gets that. she likes the validation of relationships but hates the commitment , so pretty much all of her relationships end before they ever really start. 

don’t ever tell georgia she can’t do something. she’s a stubborn bitch and she’ll either do it immediately just to spite you or dedicate her entire life to proving you wrong and that’s not something anyone needs to deal with.

very opinionated and not afraid to make sure you know !! she will stand up for what she’s believes in without even a second of hesitation.

she would not be caught dead looking unpresentable .... she’ll do her hair and a full face of make up even if she’s waking up at 4am. and don’t even bother to ask her to go out after she’s done her skin care routine .... there’s no chance 

doesn’t really know how to handle her emotions ? so when she’s hurt she tends to just .... shut down & push everyone away 

she is a hardcore adrenaline junkie , she does so much stupid shit just for the thrill. making spontaneous and impulsive decisions is her favorite pass time.  she just holds a lot of emotion in , so anything that will release all of that or make her feel anything other than the things she’s avoiding are very much welcomed.

[mediocre-writerr]

fresh eyes [jamie]

Jamie x fem reader

Requested: In a non-creepy ghost verse, reader goes to like visit Dani in England bc she wants to confront her for running away from Eddie’s death, and then basically she meets Jamie, then Dani and the whole house scheme them to get together.

For my friend @everything-im-a-fan-of​, she came up with this request and I hope you enjoy it! Also go check out her blog, it’s amazing!

*not my gif*

Ring, ring, ring, ring

You hear the rings coming from the other line of the phone as you’re trying yet again to contact your best friend Dani. Dani and you met when she met your brother Eddie. People would call you ‘The Three Musketeers’, that’s how inseparable you guys were. Before Eddie even proposed you already knew that you and Dani were gonna be best friends and sisters for life. 

When your brother proposed and Dani accepted it, you could tell her heart wasn’t in it. Maybe it was at first, but as the rehearsal dinners and the wedding planning were getting more and more serious, the more distant she became. Even though you were happy for your brother, you also knew that this whole proposal wasn’t good for either of them in the long run. Dani would have a nervous breakdown and Eddie would end up heartbroken. 

So one day you went on a lunch date with Dani and told her that he needs to tell him the truth, for both of their sakes. She did and later that night he died. Dani had become distant from you ever since, you knew what she was thinking that all of this was her fault and she had that guilt build up for a long time. And you tried to be there for her as much as possible, but one day she took off to England on an ‘impromptu’ trip, that was months ago. You just want your best friend back and to make sure she’s okay.

“Hello?” an unfamiliar voice asked from the other line. 

“Hi! My name is Y/N O’Mara! I’m looking to see if Dani is available.” you respond and you can hear rustling coming from the other line. 

“Hey Y/N,” you heard Dani respond, this is the first time hearing her voice in months. 

“Hey stranger! I have a little surprise for you!” you say excitedly. 

“Oh what is it?” she asks curiously and you can hear a small smile form on her face. 

“I’m coming to visit and see your new home that is Bly Manor! I’ve missed my best friend and I thought about needing to get away for awhile. If you don’t mind of course, I’d just really need to get away.” you say and you sigh softly waiting for her response.

“Of course that’s okay Y/N. I’m sorry I’ve been so distant and away, I promise I’ll make it up to you once you get here and I’ll explain everything!” she responds and you nod smiling over the phone. 

“Deal! I’ll see you in a couple days!” 

- - - - - - - - - - -

Arriving in London was a sight to see, but you couldn’t stay in the big city for too long. Right when you arrived you were greeted by a sweet man with a cool mustache and glasses. 

“Hi, are you Y/N O’Mara?” he asks and you nod, “Amazing! Nice to meet you, I’m Owen. I will be taking you to Bly Manor. I work with Dani.” 

I shake his hand and he smiles back, “It’s nice to meet you too! I hope my best friend hasn’t caused you guys too much trouble!” you say as he puts my luggage in the back. 

“Surprisingly not for an American, but we’re still waiting for the other foot to drop,” he jokes and you laugh, “But in all seriousness she has been lovely and actually keeps the kids in check.” 

“Good!” I reply, “If she ever causes too much trouble, give me a call and I will sort her out for you.” now it was his turn to laugh as he starts the car and makes the drive to the manor. 

You guys partake in small talk and get to know each other. You come to learn the Owen loves puns and he will do anything to keep the puns going. He’s like a dad with just dad jokes stuffed up his sleeves. 

After about an hour ride you guys finally arrive in Bly. Owen helps you out of the car while unloading your bags. You’re about to make your way inside the house when you hear snickers coming from behind the two of you.

“Owen, how many times do we have to tell you not to bring girls back to the manor to impress them? Henry always finds out and he always gets mad at us!” the voice says jokingly. 

Owen laughs and you both turn around to see a beautiful girl with curly brown hair, she had a pair of gloves crumpled into a ball in one hand, and shears in the other. Her eyes met yours and she sent you a small smirk.

“Jamie, this Y/N O’Mara, Dani’s friend,” Owen introduces the two of us, “Y/N this is Jamie, she’s our gardener.” 

You extend your hand out and she takes it softly, “A pleasure to meet you.” you say and she just nods. 

“These plants aren’t gonna cut themselves. It was nice meeting you Y/N, Poppins is gonna be glad you’re here.” Jamie responds before walking away towards the bushes. 

“A hard one to crack, don’t take it too personally.” Owen responds as we enter the house and you carry your luggage inside following suit, “Dani might be upstairs in the classroom, I can take you their if you’d like.” 

“No I can do it.” another unfamiliar voice says to reveal another women, “Hi I’m Hannah, Dani has not stopped talking about you since you called a couple days ago. It feels like we already know you!” she says and you laugh.

“Well that’s Dani for you!” you reply and the two laugh, “But yes thank you that will be lovely.” 

You follow Hannah up the stairs as she makes small talk with you. Until you finally reach the classroom and she knocks on the door interrupting Dani’s small lesson on poetry. 

“Dani, you have a visitor.” Hannah says with a smile and Dani squeals before hopping off the desk and running towards you.

“Y/N!” she yells engulfing you in a hug. 

“Dani!” you yell back as you wrap the arms around the girl. 

She looked different, but not in a bad way. In a good way. Her eyes looked a little brighter and her whole vibe just seemed to be way more positive. You couldn’t be happier that she found peace within herself and you wish she would’ve taken you along. Because while she ran away from her problems, you were still stuck with the gloominess that your family brings everyday. 

“I’d like you to meet these two,” she says releasing you from the hug as she gestures to the two children sitting at the desks, “Flora and Miles this is my best friend Y/N.” 

You give them small waves as they smile politely waving back at them, “It’s a pleasure to meet you guys!” 

“And you!” they say in unison. 

“You two most have so much to catch up on. I will watch the kids for the rest of the day so you guys can catch up.” Hannah says and Dani’s about object before Hannah cuts her off, “It’s no worries Dani really. Enjoy your day off. I will see you guys in the kitchen later so we can help Owen cook.” she sends a small smile as Dani thanks her. 

Dani leads you to her room as she closes the door softly, “I just want to apologize. I know running off wasn’t the answer and leaving you behind it killed me. It physically killed me, but I just needed to get out of there Y/N. The guilt ate me alive and I know I should’ve talked to you, but it was your brother. He died because I didn’t want to marry him.” she says and you let out a small sigh.

“I should be angry at you, but I’m not for running off. You are just as important to me as Eddie. And I know you were struggling with his death and I completely understand needing to get away. I’m not mad about running. I’m mad about you ignoring me.” you reply, “You’re my best friend and pretty much a sister to me and the fact that you felt like you couldn’t talk to me really hurt.” 

She sits down next to you and lets out another sigh, “I know I’m sorry. I just didn't know how to face you. I couldn’t face you. I was so scared and I didn't know if you’d be mad at me for killing him.” her voice cracks and you immediately shake your head.

��No, no, Dani. You did not kill Eddie you know that. He was just at the wrong place at the wrong time. I don’t blame you for any of that.” you say and immediately pull her into a hug. 

You rub her back lightly letting her let it all out. When her sniffles finally stop she looks at you with sad eyes. 

“I’ve missed you.” she says and you smile back at her.

“i’ve missed you too.” you reply sending her a small smile, “So on a much lighter note, what’s the deal with the gardener?” you ask intrigued. 

She sends you a small smirk, “Jamie? She’s a tough shell to crack, has a big ol’ ‘I don’t care about people’ front, but in reality she’s a little softie. Why? Do you think she’s cute?” 

“Maybe I do.” you reply matching her smirk. 

“Well we got two weeks to make her fall in love with you.” she shoots back and you release a laugh pushing her softly. 

“Yeah, like we’re gonna do long distance.” you respond shaking you head. 

The rest of the day goes about like that. Her endless teasing along with just catching up on everything we’ve missed the past few months. Now you guys were standing in the kitchen along with Owen and Hannah as the kids played outside. 

Jamie came walking in and bee-lined straight for the fridge, “Do we not have any food?” 

“We’re making it right now,” Hannah replies and she groans before grabbing the cookie tin from the cabinet and eating one as she leaned against the counter. 

“Are you staying for dinner Jamie?” Dani asks and Jamie nods, “Yes it’s gonna be like a family dinner! I’ll make tea and coffee for Y/N!” 

“No!” everyone including you shout in unison and she looks a little taken aback. 

“Wait Poppins made you bad coffee once?” Jamie asks and you nod. 

“Only every morning before school when we went to high school together.” you respond laughing softly. 

“Why didn’t you just not accept it after the first one?” Owen asks looking intrigued in your story. 

“Because my parents gave her a ride to school everyday and when we got to the 10th grade I could drive and she couldn’t. So I took her to school everyday and brought her home, so as a way to thank me she made me coffee. I couldn’t deny it. By the time graduation came I got used to the taste.” you tell one of your favorite stories about Dani as she just stands there sheepishly. 

Everyone lets out a laugh while Hannah goes over to make everyone a tea and you a coffee. 

“Any more stories about Poppins?” Jamie asks looking at you with that same smirk she showed you when you first met. 

“Hmm...where do I even begin?” you ponder jokingly and Dani shoves you lightly. 

“I’ve got some good stories about Y/N! If you want to hear those Jamie.” Dani says suggestively and Jamie smiles.

“Oh I would actually love to!” Jamie says and you scoff, your mouth hanging wide open.

- - - - - - - - - - -

The next week continued like that, slight flirting with Jamie that kept getting more and more obvious to everyone around you. But none of you acted on it, why? Because both of you knew that you’re going to leave soon and why start something if it’s not going to last. 

However, to everyone around you it was frustrating! They all see the tension and how happy you guys make each other, but none of you want to do anything about it for something completely out of your control. 

You and Jamie were hanging out in the garden as she was teaching you how to pull the flowers out safely. Owen, Dani, and Hannah were sitting on the side sipping on some lemonade. The children were in the city with their Uncle Henry for the next week so it was nice little break. 

You let out a loud laugh as Jamie tickled your sides for teasing her. 

“God, can’t they just get together already?” Dani asks and Owen and Hannah murmur in agreement.

“Jamie has worked here for as long as I can remember and this is the first time I’ve seen her actually happy.” Hannah says and smiles at the two girls. 

Dani lets out a sigh before sipping her lemonade, “I haven’t seen her this happy since her brother died.” 

“Maybe we should do something. It’d be sad to let Y/N leave and they aren’t able to act on them because of their fear.” Owen chimes in.

“What did you have in mind?” Dani asks eyeing him curiously. 

“I have just the idea!” 

- - - - - - - - - - -

You made your way down the stairs to dinner after showering up and dressing into something more nice. Dani said that since the kids are gone we’re gonna have a themed dinner party. And by party she meant the small family you guys have created in the week you were there: Owen, Hannah, Dani, Jamie, and you. 

When you got downstairs the dining area was lit with candles as a beautiful bouquet of flowers sat at the middle. The table already set with plates and forks. Jamie was the next one who came down and at the sight of her your mouth dropped.

She was drop dead gorgeous and you couldn’t help, but stare at the beauty she is. 

“Close your mouth darling, you’re gonna catch flies.” she says tapping your chin lightly as she walks by.

“I’m sorry, you just you look gorgeous.” you whisper still staring at her in awe and she smiles softly at you. In the candlelit room you see a faint blush on her cheeks, “Oh I’m sorry! Where are my manners?” you ask getting up from your seat and pulling out the one directly across from you. 

She sits down gracefully as you catch a wiff of her scent. She smelled of fresh flowers and somehow woodsy at the same time. Whatever she smelled like you were intoxicated by it. 

“Where is the rest of them?” she asks and I shrug.

“I expected to see everyone else by now, but they haven’t come down yet...” your gaze drifts at the small movement of someone walking in behind Jamie.

“Y/N? What are you-oh my god...” Jamie replies.

Dani walks into the room wearing a waitress uniform while Hannah comes in wearing a sophisticated coat and tail with a violin in hand. 

“What is going on?” you look at the two girls and they just smirk while Jamie looked just as confused as you were. 

“Good evening Ms. Y/N and Ms. Jamie. Me and our staff are so very happy you lovely ladies chose us as your dinner reservation for your first date.” Dani says in her super bad, yet super cute British accent. 

Jamie and you look at each other, both eyes wide as you guys realize what’s going on. All three of them literally went out of their way to force into a date. 

“Tonight our renowned chef Owen has cooked you guys up a three course meal. All of these recipes he created all on his own with the help of his handy dandy Jamie Oliver cookbook. Now can I interest you ladies into anything to drink?” she asks and you look at each other and laugh.

“Um Y/L/N, would you like anything particular?” Jamie asks you and you smile before shaking your head, “Alright can we have a bottle of your aged pinot noir?” 

Dani nods before leaving the dining area to go grab the wine. The smell of Owen’s cooking automatically makes your stomach rumble in anticipation as the scent makes its way into the room. Hannah begins to play the violin softly in the background.

You and Jamie take a look at each other before bursting out laughing. Both in shock and awe at how far your friends went to get you guys on this date, “Did you know about this?” you ask her and she shakes her head.

“No not at all, but I really wish I thought of it.” she replies smiling softly and you’re about to reply when Dani comes back into the room.

“Your bottle m’ladies,” Dani says placing the two wine glasses down in front of you.

She pops open the cork before pouring you both an even amount before smiling softly. Owen comes into the room with two plates in hand. He’s wearing a big white chef hat with a full on chef’s outfit. 

“Hello lovebirds, for your first course you have one of my personal favorite starters Spanish-style prawns with fennel,” he says placing both plates down in front of us, “I hope you enjoy.” him and Dani bow before making their way back to the kitchen.

The prawns sat a top a beautiful tomato sauce with sprinkles of fennel and parsley mixed throughout all of it. As lemons and bread garnished the rest of the plate. The smell was absolutely amazing. 

You pick up your glass of wine and raise it to her, “To the best friends that we could ask for. This date would have never happened without their help. And to us, whatever this is.” she smiles at you before clinking together your two glasses.

You both take a bite of your food and it’s literally heaven on Earth. You both let out a small little groan at how unbelievably good this is. After you guys finished eating you both turned and started to have a nice conversation.

“So what was your first impression of me?” you ask her and she smiles to herself softly before replying. 

“I thought damn we have another hot American on our hands.” she says and you both release a laugh, “Us first meeting was very short, but I felt like I got a good grasp on how you were, but there was still some mystery there that I wasn’t quite sure of. I was intrigued. And yours?” 

“I thought ‘damn does every girl in London look like her because if so, when can I move??’” she shakes her head as you both laugh again, “But no I found your sense of humor right up my alley and I guess I was also intrigued. You put up such a cold front, it didn’t seem like you quite liked me.” 

“Oh I liked you...way more than I’d like to admit.” she whispers and you smile.

Owen and Dani come back with a bowl in their hands, “Now we have your second course of Irish stew. It is sliced lamb chops with finely chopped onions, carrots, and potatoes. Enjoy.” Owen says before hurrying back to the kitchen.

Dani smiles at the two of us, “More wine ladies?” 

“Yes please.” you respond shaking your head at your best friend. 

She poured out both our glasses before wiggling her eyebrows, smiling giddily. 

“Y/N you have a wine mustache!” Dani whisper yells before taking your napkin and wiping it away like your mom would usually do.

You smack her hand lightly, “Dani!” Jamie lets out a hearty laugh before Dani runs back into the kitchen with Owen. 

Hannah took a small little wine break from playing the violin. She smiles at the two of you with a small smirk on her face. We continue to eat the delicious food that Owen made while having small conversations in between each bite. 

You both finish your food and continue a game of 20 questions. 

“Hmm, why do you think you’re here?” Jamie asks as the 19th question.

“Here as in London or here as in life in general?” you ask and she laughs softly.

“Life in general.” she confirms and you nod.

“That’s deep,” you say laughing softly, “But um I guess I’m here to make people happy. Anything I can do I do to make the people care about happy and safe.” 

“Am I one of those people?” she asks and you smile at her. 

“Is that your last question?” you ask raising your eyebrow and she nods, “Yes you are. You know besides Dani because she doesn’t count since she’s like a sister to me.  You’re definitely on top. I’ve grown to really like being around you and who you are. My head is telling me that you’re a bad idea, but I think my heart knows that I really like you.” you say and you take her hand in yours.

“What’s your last question?” she whispers back to you, her eyes never leaving yours. 

“Will you be my girlfriend?” you whisper and her small smile widens. 

“I think I could manage that.” she says her smile reaching from ear to ear. 

You get up from your seat and she does the same. She takes your face in her hands before pressing her lips against yours. Her lips are just as soft as you imagine. No matter how many times you’ve dreamt or fantasized about this, you finally get the chance, and it’s so much better than in your dreams.

Both of you pull apart at the sound of someone clearing their throat. You see Owen, Dani, and Hannah standing there with wide smiles on their faces. 

“Finally!” Hannah yells, “Do you know how much tension was in this room?! I was just sitting here playing the violin awkwardly!” 

We all laugh and Jamie presses a small kiss to your cheek. Owen held a cake in his hands as he placed it on the table. 

“Your last meal a strawberry and cream sponge cake!” he says and you laugh at him. 

“Sit down and eat with us!” you suggest and they all look at each other before Dani says.

“Don’t have to ask me twice!” she cuts herself a slice and sits down at where Jamie’s spot once was.

You all sit down with each other. Jamie on your right side as she kept a hold of your hand at all times. All of you sat there enjoying the rest of the night laughing and smiling. Jamie leans in close and gives you a small peck. 

[jamielea81]

When We Were Young

Chapter 1

Description: Leaving the only home your daughter had ever known wasn’t part of the grand plan. But then again, sometimes taking chances can change your whole life. And you should know that, you’ve been doing that since the start.

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader

Warnings: Slight angst, maybe a curse word or two.

Word Count: 2,271

A/N: Super nervous about this one. As always, this is strictly for fun as I know nothing about the personal life of Chris Evans. This series takes place in 2018.

*Italics are internal thoughts*

**

This is it. This…is…it. Okay, deep breath. Plaster on that smile.

“We’re almost there,” you sing-songed.

“Mom…” your daughter Ellie groaned.

Turning your head to the side, your co-pilot was currently nose deep in a book.

Better than her phone.

She’s a great kid and you really couldn’t complain. At fifteen you were pulling away from your parents as were most of your friends. It had been the two of you for so long that you were closer than ever. She didn’t keep secrets from you and you didn’t keep any from her. That had been your deal for years.

“I’m hoping we beat the moving truck there. Would hate to pay them to sit around,” you said eyeing the clock on the dash.

“It’s a moving truck and you don’t exactly have a light foot,” she replied, tucking in a bookmark and setting her book on her lap.

“What are you implying Ellington?” Smirk ever-present in your voice.

“It’s just that you tend to speed mother dear. When we were on the open roads in North Carolina that was one thing, but I don’t think you’ll get away with that in Boston.”

“Just wait until you start driving. You’re going to be worse than me!” you laughed. “But your probably right.”

“Don’t forget to sign me up for classes. You promised after the move you’d enroll me.”

“I know and I will. Let’s just get the school tour and the first few days of classes settled first. One step at a time,” you replied, giving her a soft smile.

Where did the time go?

“And are you ready?” she questioned.

“Ready for what?” you asked, small frown appearing on your lips.

“You’re new job. The new house. It’s an entirely different part of the country. It’s a lot,” Ellie sighed out. “Even I know that and I’m the one that wanted this change.” She placed her hand over your right hand that held the steering wheel.

“I’m ready.” You nodded your head because you really were. “This is for you, baby. But a little part of this is for me too. Change is good,” you said shrugging your shoulders. “That’s what they say right?” You gave her a questioning look which she chuckled at.

“Absolutely, mom,” Ellie agreed.

**

Despite your concern, the two of you made it to the townhome before the movers. The car was unloaded and food ordered before they even pulled up.

All of your furniture had survived the move, but now that you had it in the house, the beach vibe really wasn’t matching with the old brick row home. If your savings weren’t mostly depleted, you’d consider purchasing a new living room and dining room set. Only one box of miscellaneous knickknacks was damaged beyond repair from the move up the coast. According to your daughter, it was just an excuse to go shopping.

Ellie was tucked away in her new room organizing her clothes, promising she’d actually go to sleep in the next thirty minutes. It was a big day for her and you as she would tour her new school. The school specializing in engineering was the reason you were here. While Ellie didn’t inherit the social awkwardness you experienced in junior high and most of high school, she was also incredible smart. How your beautiful daughter turned out so well rounded only being raised by you was a bit of a mystery, but you thanked your lucky stars every night.

When Ellie came to you ten months ago with a glittery pink folder filled with the school’s brochure, a list of courses she planned to take, a breakdown of tuition cost, nearby neighborhoods, and a recommendation for one of her teachers, you knew she was serious. She had been talking about Harvard since she was nine years old when her school had a special speaker that had mentioned graduating from the esteemed university. She reminded you that when she did start her college career there, because she knew she’d get in, it would be a lot easier on you if you lived locally. Sometimes she was too smart for her own good.

Reaching out to a of couple old NYU classmate who lived in Boston was the easy part. Getting your small two-bedroom bungalow solid was the tough part. The house sat on the market for two months without so much as a nibble. The two of you got to work painting every room, replacing light fixtures, baseboards, and outlets. It paid off in the end as your house was in escrow a month later.

While you liked having a detached home, it wasn’t in the budget in Boston or in any of the surrounding suburbs. Your old classmate Hillary, who was happy to reconnect really steered you toward a row home. After searching Google for months, you found a rental in the town of Belmont that was conveniently located near Ellie’s high school. And just like that, you were saying goodbye to the only town she had ever known.

Wine. You needed wine if you were going to stop worrying and get some sleep yourself. If only you could find a wine glass. Digging through the one of three boxes labeled “dishes”, you gave up your search when you came up empty after the first box.

“A coffee cup will do.”

Filling the mug three quarters of the way full, you headed back to the couch, resting your feet up on the cushions and thought about how your lives were going to change. Ellie was excited for a new city and school, but you were sure she also held onto some anxiety on the inside as she tended to do.  

When you were three months pregnant, you moved to Wilmington North Carolina with your college classmate Peter who was nice enough to offer you a place to stay. You certainly couldn’t go home to Kentucky. Not when you were pregnant and single. Not that you wanted to anyway. Wilmington is where you built your life for the last sixteen years and you missed it already.

You grew up in a very structured home. Middle child to wealthy parents who weren’t shy about how much they had. They had goals for you and for the most part, you obeyed. Piano lessons, cello lessons, dance, although, that one ended shortly after you started. Private schools, tutors, math camp, really anything that would help you succeed. You did well in school because you worked hard. Not that you had a choice really. College and then back home to work for your father’s company. No doubt they had a short list of potential husbands handpicked for you by your sixteenth birthday. You’d be engaged by twenty four, married, by twenty five, first child by twenty seven. It wasn’t what you wanted. You wanted to plan out the rest of your life, not have it planned out for you. Having a child on your own terms was very much a part of your plans.

**

Leaving work early after only two weeks at Hayward Financial was not on your calendar for the day. Two appointments with new clients had to be canceled with new ones set up for the following week. Receiving a call from Middlebury Engineering Academy that your daughter missed third and fourth period was most certainly not a call you expected to get. She loved school. Always had perfect attendance except for that one year where she got very sick with the flu and had to miss three days. Missing class was more painful to Ellie than the illness itself. Maybe you missed something. Maybe she wasn’t as happy as she seemed. She already had a small group of friends but maybe they weren’t good kids. You slammed your hands on the steering wheel.

“Where are you Ellington Rae?”

You had already called her cellphone three times and texted her twice as much but she wasn’t responding. Home was your first stop but she wasn’t there. The coffee shop was next. It was a favorite for the two of you, stopping there at least four days a week. Unfortunately, they hadn’t seen her. The pizza place, sandwich shop, frozen yogurt kiosk, library, that clothing boutique she had been begging you to take her to since her friend Carmen had mentioned it, all turned up empty. On the verge of tears, you pulled back into your driveway for the second time that day and called your best friend who not only felt a thousand miles away but actually was a thousand miles away in Wilmington. This was the hard part about moving somewhere new. You hadn’t met the neighbors, hadn’t introduced yourself to the parents of Ellie’s friends, barely knew her teachers. You had never felt more alone than you did at that moment.

“Gwen…” you said, voice barely holding on.

“What’s wrong? Shit. Give me a second, I’m going to step outside,” she said.

You got out of the car, walking up the stairs with the phone attached to your ear and your bag in your other hand. You pushed your shoulder up to hold the phone in place while you dug for the keys.

“Okay, tell me what’s going on.

“It was a mistake coming here,” you sobbed, dropping the keys on the kitchen island. “I miss Wilmington.”

“Oh babe. You love it there. You already told me you do,” she sighed.

“Not anymore. We’re coming home. I just need, um I just need to get out of my lease. We can stay with you right?”

“Always. But that’s not going to happen. Now tell me what’s bringing this panic on.”

**

“I can do this. Just act like you know what you’re doing,” Ellie said to herself, taking a big breath, straightening her shoulders, and walking out the door.

Leaving campus after second period was a lot easier than she thought it would be. Between the hustle and bustle of the hallway, watching the exits apparently wasn’t a thing teachers did. She walked three blocks from campus and ordered an Uber. The app was already on her phone from when her mom’s car got a flat and they decided to get lunch rather than sit around the repair shop. Her mom would be mad at her, but this was worth it and she would apologize for it later.

Her driver dropped her off in front of the booming convention center. She’d always wanted to go to one of these things, just never figured she’d be ditching school to do it. The building was massive with an impressive architectural roof. The engineer in her was beaming, but she wasn’t here for that. No, she was on a schedule. This was her one chance and she wasn’t going to blow it standing outside. Walking past the dozen or so smokers, she made her way inside the convention center, making a stop at the registration table to grab her credentials. While most attendees lined up early to be let in as soon as the doors were open, Ellie was not the average attendee.

Checking her phone for the time, she saw the dozen or so missed calls and texts. She was going to be in so much trouble when she got home and she honestly hated herself for making her mom worry. Ellie had an hour before she could line up for the one photograph she purchased months ago. Deciding to kill time in the vendor room seemed like the best option. Maybe she could buy something for you to make up for giving you wrinkles at an early age.

After browsing for some time, Ellie settled on two matching beaded bracelets in your favorite color for each of you. Maybe when you finally forgave her, you’d wear them and go to brunch like the two of you enjoyed doing back in Wilmington.

Combing her fingers through her hair for the fourth time, Ellie leaned to the side to check the length of the line once more. There were maybe twenty to twenty five people ahead of her, so she knew it would go fast. But if she had to hear how hot Chris Evans was one more time, she was going to scream. Ellie had rehearsed what she was going to say a million times in her head, but she wasn’t sure if she’d be able verbalize the words. An opportunity like this wouldn’t happen again, at least not one this easily.

She was led into a room with two other girls not much older than herself. They were here together and couldn’t stop giggling. Chris said hello and both said hello in unison causing Ellie to sigh.

“How do you want to pose for the photo?” Chris asked.

“Could we both hug you?” one of the girls asked.

“Yeah, that would be okay,” Chris replied, giving them each a smile which only caused them to giggle more and Ellie to roll her eyes.

After the girls said goodbye, two more people were ushered in the room behind Ellie. The assistant urged her forward to a smiling Chris.

“Hi sweetheart. How would you like to pose for our photo?” Ellie gulped in reply. “Don’t be nervous. How about I just give you a side hug?”

Ellie nodded her head as Chris wrapped his arm around her waist. She turned her head to face him, seeing that he wasn’t looking at her, but at the camera.

“You’re my dad,” she exclaimed.

Chris whipped his head to the side to face her. “What?” he whispered.

“You’re my father.”

Chapter 2

**

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