#i miss the dreams i keep having of warm spaces and soft touches and homecooked food
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#rain always makes me feel happy and calm and safe#thunderstorms even moreso.#i really wish it was raining right now.#antidepressants are supposed to make you not feel bad#instead im feeling everything and idk what to do with it#my therapist told me that I would start feeling more on them so im not surprised#but i just dream of good things. very good things.#and then wake up and reality is bad#I wish I didnt have to wake up#i miss the dreams i keep having of warm spaces and soft touches and homecooked food#the gentle monotony of being in a safe space with others#the warm pinks and browns and hardwood and swirling soups of sensory#the feeling of things ive never had#of people that have no faces but have loving embraces#the serenity of being with a lover that never has a shape but has everything i want#and then i wake up#and its all gone
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