#i miss fixating on him but i'll try to be around though

[clooneys]

popping up after years of inactivity just to say i still love the fuck out of this brilliant guy <3

[misahyochaeng]

Can we get a momo car smut? it would suit her scene in the Strategy mv 😮‍💨

Let Me Into Your Heart. 🎄

tw - fluff, angst, smut, car sex, idol x idol!reader, tenth member reader, friends to (?), cunnilingus, bi-curious!reader, implied cheating/breakup, fingering, first time with a girl, praise kink.

note: a lil christmas gift for yall!!! enjoy

—

“Should we get more popcorn?” Chaeyoung asked as she shook around the unpopped kernels in the ceramic bowl they had all been using. All ten eyes fixated on the TV screen that was displaying the movie “Home Alone.” It had become a group tradition to watch it every christmas-eve.

“Chaeyoung, this is our fifth bag, we’re gonna run out of popcorn before this movie is even finished.” Jihyo scolded lightly as she sat on Sana’s lap, the Japanese girl toying and twirling with some locs of Jihyo’s hair. “Well it’s not my fault some people here aren’t saving some popcorn for the rest of us!” Chaeyoung argued as she eyed you and Momo, a pout of her face as she sulked with furrowed brows. Momo stuck her tongue out and mocked the girl while you stuck your middle finger out and pouted, some banter immersing you all as the movie continued on.

Your phone buzzed.

Jisung: “Y/N, can we talk?.”

The playful banter continued for a few moments before your phone buzzed again, louder this time, cutting through the sound of the movie. You glanced down at the screen, your heart sinking slightly at the message:

Jisung: “Please, it’s serious.”

For the past few days, he'd been distant—barely answering texts, no late-night calls after hard weeks of recording, no cute emojis or "I miss you" messages. Nothing. The sudden flood of unease gnawed at your popcorn filled stomach. You weren’t sure if it was the holiday season or the amount of unaligned schedules, but the weight of his absence had started to feel heavier than usual.

Momo, sitting beside you, noticed the subtle shift in your mood. She glanced at your phone and then back at you, her expression softening. "Are you okay?" she asked quietly, her voice laced with concern, her hand caressing yours with her thumb.

You froze for a moment, suddenly aware of how tense your shoulders had become. You didn’t want to dive into it now—not with everyone here, not on Christmas Eve. You forced a smile, but it felt brittle, like it might break at any moment. "Yeah... I'm fine. I’m just gonna step outside for a bit. I'll be right back."

Momo looked at you for a second longer, her brow furrowed, but she didn’t press. She knew better than to push too hard when you weren’t ready to talk. "Alright. Let me know if you need anything," she said softly, her eyes staying on you for a moment before you stood up and headed for the door.

You made your way down the hallway, the muffled sound of laughter from the living room fading behind you. The cold air hit your face as you stepped outside, the sudden silence almost suffocating. You unlocked your phone again, reading Jisung’s message over and over:

Jisung: “Call me. I need to tell you now.”

A chill ran through you, though not from the shivering cold. Serious? What did that even mean? You stared at the screen, fingers frozen in place. Part of you didn’t want to know the answer, but you couldn’t ignore it. You needed to hear it from him, even though you already had a sinking feeling in your gut.

Taking a shaky breath, you tapped his name, a little white heart next to it. The phone rang twice, then he picked up. His voice was different—distant, quieter than usual.

"Hey," you said, trying to keep your voice steady, but it cracked slightly. "Hey," Jisung replied, but there was something in his tone—hesitation? Nervousness? You couldn’t tell.

You swallowed, trying to shake off the dread creeping into your chest. "What’s going on? Is everything alright?" There was a long pause before he spoke again, his voice even more strained now. "I... I think we need to talk."

The words hung in the air, and your heart skipped a beat. We need to talk—you knew what that meant. You felt the air go still, the weight of the moment pressing down on you. “About what?” you asked, barely above a whisper.

He let out a long breath, like he was trying to find the right words. “I don’t think we’re... I don’t think we’re right for each other anymore,” he said, his voice barely audible now. “I think it’s time we... end things.”

You couldn’t breathe for a second. The words stung in a way you hadn’t expected. You felt your chest tighten, the cold air no longer offering any relief. “Jisung, no...” you managed to whisper, the lump in your throat making it hard to speak. You had expected this to come, but hearing it... it still hurt.

There was silence on the other end for a long moment, and then he sighed. "I’m sorry. I just... I think it’s better this way." The words felt like a slap in the face, and the world seemed to tilt beneath your feet. It was Christmas Eve. You had been hoping, maybe even pretending, that things could be fixed, that it was just a rough patch. But this... this was the final word.

You tried to steady your breath, but it felt impossible. Please, you thought. Just don’t let it end like this.

"Jisung, please... don’t do this," you whispered, your voice cracking despite your best effort to keep it steady. "We can fix this. I know we can. Just... talk to me. Please." There was a long silence on the other end, and you could almost feel the distance growing between you, stretching wider and wider. His voice finally broke through, distant and emotionless. "I’ve already talked to my company," he said, each word heavier than the last. "They’re going to issue a statement tomorrow. It’s already been decided."

A statement. Your chest tightened. Your throat felt like it was closing. "A statement?" you echoed, almost laughing at how absurd it sounded, but the bitter edge to your voice made it clear you weren’t finding any humor in it. "You’re not just ending things, Jisung. You’re... you’re making it official with a statement?"

“I can’t keep doing this,” he said, and there was a finality to it. Something in his tone said this wasn’t a conversation anymore—it was a conclusion. A chapter closing. “This... it’s for the best.” The words stabbed at you like a thousand needles. For the best? How could this be for the best?

“No,” you whispered, your heart pounding. “No, Jisung. I don’t want this. I can’t just... let you go. Not like this. You can’t make a decision like that without even trying—please.” You squeezed your eyes shut, desperate to pull yourself together, but you were barely holding on. “We can talk about it. We can fix this. Please.”

“I’ve thought about it, and I know this is what’s best for both of us,” he replied, but his words felt like they were slipping away from you, becoming less real with every breath. There was no room for anything else, no space for the love you’d shared. Just cold, emotionless distance. A lump formed in your throat as you pressed your palm to your forehead, trying to stop the tears from coming. "But I love you," you said, the words slipping out before you could stop them. "I don’t want to let you go. Please don’t do this. I can’t—"

He sighed. It was long and exhausted, like he was done explaining, done trying to make you understand. “I’m sorry,” he said, his voice soft but final, like he was already saying goodbye. “I think it’s better this way. I really do.”

"No," you repeated, your voice barely above a whisper, your entire body trembling. *Please, don’t hang up. Please, don’t leave me with just this.* "Please... please just listen to me, Jisung. We can work through it. We can—"

But before you could finish, there was a sharp click.

The call ended.

You stared at your phone, your hand shaking, the empty screen glaring back at you as if mocking your attempts to hold it together. The cold air outside suddenly felt suffocating, and you clutched the phone in your hand, but it did nothing to ease the tightness in your chest.

He was gone. Just like that.

A familiar voice cut through the cold silence.

“Y/N, the girls told me to bring you a jacket, Jihyo didn’t want you catching a co—”

Momo stopped mid-sentence when she saw you, her words faltering as she took in the sight of you standing there. Your face was pale, eyes swollen and red, and your nose was bright from the cold, but it was clear—it wasn’t the cold that had made you look this way.

Her breath caught in her chest. She could see it in your eyes—something had shattered, and it wasn’t just the chill of the night.

You didn’t speak, just stood there, looking like you were trying to hold yourself together, but barely. Momo’s heart twisted as she saw how small you seemed, how lost you were.

For a moment, neither of you moved. Then, instinctively, Momo stepped forward, her voice soft but full of concern. “Y/N…”

You didn’t respond. You just looked at her, your lips trembling, and that was all it took for Momo to close the distance between you. She didn't ask any more questions, not yet—she just shrugged the jacket off her shoulders and wrapped it around you, the thick wool lining offering warmth against your skin. The smell of her perfume, the faintest trace of something sweet and familiar, clung to the jacket, mixing with the cold air around you.

She pulled you closer, wrapping her arms around you, her hands warm against your trembling body. For a few seconds, she just held you, letting the silence settle between you. She could feel the tension in your body—the way you were trying to hold it all in, like you were waiting for something to change.

Momo didn’t know what to say. The words felt like they were stuck in her throat, but one thing she did know: you needed her, and that was enough for now.

Her thumb brushed softly across your cheek, wiping away a tear you didn’t even realize had fallen. She took a deep breath, her voice breaking the silence, but barely above a whisper. “What happened?” Her words were careful, like she didn’t want to push you too hard. "Y/N, please talk to me."

You closed your eyes, the pain in your chest threatening to crush you with each breath you took. You shook your head as if to shake off the reality of it. “He… he ended it. Just like that.”

Her arms tightened around you, but she didn’t say anything for a moment. She just let you keep talking, keep processing.

“He… said it was for the best. That it’s over. That we’re over.” You choked on the last words, your throat so tight you could barely breathe. “He’s already talking to his company, Momo. They’re going to release a statement tomorrow…” You trailed off, your voice barely audible, and your hands gripped the edges of the jacket she’d wrapped around you as if it were the only thing anchoring you to reality.

Momo’s chest ached as she heard your words, her heart breaking for you. She knew you and Jisung had been going through something, but this? This felt so final. Her fingers brushed against your hair gently, tucking a strand behind your ear.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered, her voice thick with emotion. “I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

You just shook your head, unable to say anything more. The weight of everything was too much, and for the first time in a long while, you let yourself lean into her warmth. Momo held you like she’d never let you go, like she could protect you from all of this pain, even though she knew she couldn’t. But she would be here. She would always be here.

Momo gently pulled away, but kept her hands on your arms, her voice soft but insistent. “Okay, listen to me. We’re gonna get through this,” she said, her tone more confident now, though there was still a quiver of concern underneath. “I’m gonna go talk to the girls. We’ll come up with something. I’ll take you out for a little drive, get some air. You deserve that right now, okay?”

You didn’t have the energy to argue. You just nodded, still trying to breathe through the ache in your chest. Momo squeezed your shoulders before rushing back inside to join the others.

Momo burst back into the living room, still feeling the weight of the moment. The girls glanced up at her, noticing her flushed cheeks and the wild, panicked look in her eyes. Before anyone could say anything, Momo blurted out, “It’s over. She... he ended it. It’s over.”

The words hit the room like a bomb, and the girls froze. For a second, no one moved. Then, a beat later, Nayeon looked up from her phone, her eyes wide. “Wait, wait—what?” She blinked rapidly, trying to process. “Momo, have you seen a ghost? What’s happening?” Momo groaned, running a hand through her hair in frustration. “I’m serious, Nayeon. It’s over. Y/N’s heartbroken, and I... I don’t know what to do. She’s falling apart, and I just—” She shook her head, cutting herself off. “I need to fix this.”

Jihyo looked up from her seat with a knowing smile, trying to calm Momo down. “We’re not saying you have to fix everything, Momo. But you can’t do it alone.”

“Right,” Sana added, her voice light with a teasing tone. “You need help. You’ve been practically obsessed with Y/N for months. It's okay, we see it.” Momo’s face turned beet red, her hands flailing in the air as she tried to brush off their comments. “I... I’m just trying to help her. This is about her, not me!” She was still panicking, but it was clear from her flushed face and darting eyes that they were right. She liked you. She always had.

Chaeyoung gave her a knowing look, a sly smile tugging at her lips. “Momo… you do know this is just a breakup, right?”

Momo froze. “What do you mean? Of course it’s just a breakup—what else could it be?!” she said, waving her arms dramatically. Sana, eyes twinkling, smirked. “Momo, we’ve been watching you two for months now. The way you look at her? You think we didn’t notice? Please.”

“Yeah, you’ve practically been ready to confess,” Jihyo added, crossing her arms. “Except you keep getting interrupted by work or... Y/N’s boyfriends or whatever.” Momo’s face went bright red. “What? No! I—I’m just—what?!" Her hands flailed in the air even harder now, like she was trying to swat the conversation away. “I don’t know what you’re talking about! I’m just trying to make her feel better, okay? She’s my best friend. That’s all.”

Chaeyoung leaned back into the couch, crossing her arms with an exaggerated sigh. “Sure. Best friend. And you want to make her feel better because...?”

Sana and Jihyo both shot Momo a knowing look, and Momo groaned, hiding her face in her hands. “Okay, fine! Fine, I like her. But that doesn’t matter right now! She’s hurting, and I need to figure out how to help her.”

“Look,” Jihyo said, leaning forward with a smirk. “It’s okay. We’ve all been in your shoes at some point.” She paused dramatically, glancing at the others. “Well, not everyone.” She shot a look at Sana, who rolled her eyes.

But now wasn’t the time for that. “I’m taking her out for a drive. She needs to clear her head,” Momo said quickly, trying to regain control of the situation. “I’m gonna be there for her. I just... I need to get her to feel better, okay?”

Chaeyoung leaned back on the couch, folding her arms and raising an eyebrow. “Oh, so now we’re trying to get her to feel better. What happened to the Momo who was all, ‘We’re just friends’? Huh? You’ve got it bad, don’t you?”

Momo’s face went even redder, but before she could respond, Jihyo stepped in, holding up a bar of chocolate with a smirk. “Here, Momo,” she said, tossing it to her. “You’re gonna need this. Chocolate fixes everything.”

Momo caught the chocolate, but she barely acknowledged it, her mind still racing; then she blinked, momentarily distracted by the random appearance of chocolate in Jihyo’s pocket. “...Wait, did you just have that in your pocket this whole time?”

Jihyo smirked, unwrapping another bar she had stored. “Never leave home without it.”

“Oh you’re weird.. anyways, right. I’ve got this. I’ll take her for a drive, talk things through... Just... make her feel better. Mission: Help Y/N Feel Better is a go.” She gave a dramatic sigh, half-exasperated, half-hoping she wasn’t totally messing this up.

The girls all nodded in unison, giving her supportive smiles.

Momo quickly turned toward the door, but not before shooting one last glance at the girls, her mind still racing. "Thanks, guys."

The scene shifted, and suddenly, Momo was standing with you at the front door. The moment of action felt strangely quiet between you two, almost like you were both holding your breath.

“So...” Momo started awkwardly, holding the strings of her hoodie inbetween her fingers like it might help steady her. “I thought... maybe we could just go for a little drive? Clear our heads. Get away from all of this for a bit.”

You stood there for a second, still processing everything, feeling the cold air against your cheeks. You glanced at her, your eyes tired, but you nodded.

“Yeah,” you whispered, forcing a weak smile. “That sounds... good.”

Momo hesitated, her hands fidgeting with her hoodie before she stuffed her hands in its pockets. Her heart skipped. It was like it was happening too fast, but also, it was the only thing that made sense. You needed comfort, and she needed to be there for you. That’s all she could do right now.

“Alright,” Momo said, almost to herself, trying to regain her composure. “Let’s go.” And with that, the door clicked closed behind you both, the world outside waiting—neither of you knowing exactly how the night would unfold, but knowing you wouldn’t be facing it alone.

Momo opened the car door for you, her hands steady but her mind racing. “Here,” she said softly, offering a warm smile as you slid into the seat. She closed the door gently behind you before walking around to the driver’s side, sliding in and starting the engine. She glanced at you with a playful smile. “You want the heater on?”

You groggily nodded, your body shivering slightly from the cold air outside. The warmth of the car hit you almost immediately, flushing through you like a wave, and you let out a small sigh of relief.

Momo reached into the backseat, pulling out a thick, cozy-looking blanket. She held it up to you, her brow furrowed in mock seriousness. “Do you always just keep this here?”

You raised an eyebrow at her teasing. “Do you want it or not?” Momo shot back, her lips puckered in that endearing way she did when she was being playful.

You giggled softly, nodding. “Fine, I’ll take it.”

With a smile, she wrapped the blanket around you, tucking it in carefully, her hands brushing against your arms as she did. You let out a pleased sigh, sinking deeper into the warmth.

Momo buckled up, starting the car and pulling out of the driveway, her focus now on the road ahead. The quiet hum of the engine filled the car, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. You watched the side windows begin to fog up, your breath a little heavier, as you gazed out at the Christmas decorations twinkling in the distance. Couples walked hand-in-hand, laughing under the soft glow of holiday lights, and for a moment, you forgot how cold it had been outside, lost in the warmth of the car.

But then, just as quickly as it came, the thought of him slipped into your mind. It had been your second Christmas together. Your second Christmas you wouldn’t get to share with him again. The ache in your chest returned, the holiday cheer around you somehow making it worse.

Momo broke the silence before it could consume you. “Are you thinking about him again?” she asked bluntly, glancing over at you.

You froze for a second, caught off guard, then quickly lied. “No,” you said, forcing a small smile as you looked away from her.

Momo didn’t miss the way you stiffened, the shift in your expression. She knew. Her voice softened, but there was something else there, something sharp. “He never really deserved you.”

The way she said it made something in your chest tighten. There was an odd tone in her voice—something... almost like jealousy? You looked over at her, trying to make sense of it, but before you could ask, she continued, rambling softly as if trying to hide the edge in her words.

“He was an ass, Y/N. Seriously. No one should treat you the way he did. You deserve so much more than that...”

You couldn’t help it. You teased, your lips curling into a small grin. “Are you sure you’re not the one going through the breakup?”

Momo’s eyes widened in surprise before she laughed softly, her usual playful nature returning. “I’m just... sympathizing,” she said, her tone light but with a hint of something deeper you couldn’t quite place.

You softened, your expression turning more serious. “Thank you, Momo.”

The silence fell again, but this time, it felt different. It wasn’t uncomfortable. It was just two people, driving through the night, each lost in their own thoughts but sharing the same space, the same moment. The world outside was busy, filled with lights and laughter, but here, in the car, there was only warmth and quiet.

After a few more minutes of driving, Momo pulled into a small coffee shop parking lot. The warm glow of the shop’s windows was inviting, and the smell of coffee and cocoa drifted in the air. Momo shifted the car into park and turned to you, her smile returning. “Let’s go get some hot cocoa. You look like you could use it.”

You stared at the coffee shop happily, a soft smile tugging at your lips. You hadn’t realized how much you’d been craving something sweet, something to distract you from the ache that had been gnawing at your chest.

With a quick nod, you unbuckled your seatbelt, excitement bubbling up inside you. “I love hot cocoa,” you said, practically bouncing in your seat.

Momo chuckled at your enthusiasm, rolling her eyes playfully as you quickly hopped out of the car, your steps light. “You’re like a little kid,” she teased, but there was affection in her voice.

You didn’t care. For the first time all night, you felt a little lighter, and Momo was the reason for it.

As you both stepped into the coffee shop, the cozy atmosphere immediately embraced you. The air was filled with the scent of coffee, cinnamon, and a hint of peppermint. The place was decorated with twinkling lights, a large tree in the corner sparkling with gold and red ornaments, and little touches of holiday cheer all around. The soft hum of Christmas music played in the background, making everything feel warm and festive.

Momo walked up to the counter and ordered the Christmas special hot cocoa—whipped cream topped with little Christmas sprinkles, the kind that made you feel like you were inside a snow globe. When the drinks arrived, she handed one to you with a smile.

You took a sip, and the sweetness hit you almost immediately, the warmth of the cocoa comforting you in ways you didn’t expect. A wide smile spread across your face, and Momo watched, amused.

She giggled softly, her eyes crinkling with affection. “You’re adorable,” she mumbled under her breath, watching you with a soft expression. Then, without warning, she pulled out her phone and snapped a quick picture.

You blinked, caught off guard but still smiling, and struck a playful pose, holding up your mug like a model. You giggled at yourself as Momo put the phone down, her eyes still fixed on you.

“I probably look so bad right now,” you said, rubbing your eyes lightly, feeling a little embarrassed.

Momo quickly shook her head, her voice a little too loud in her rush to correct you. “Don’t say that! You’re always pretty, Y/N.” The words slipped out awkwardly, and she immediately flushed, her cheeks turning pink.

You couldn’t help but tease her. “Aww, you’re so sweet, Momo,” you said, your voice teasing as you grinned. “You’re totally in love with me, aren’t you?”

Momo sulked, slumping in her chair and crossing her arms, clearly embarrassed. “Shut up,” she muttered, hiding her face behind her mug. “You’re such a brat.”

You both fell into a comfortable silence, sipping your drinks. Then, just as the moment started to feel peaceful, Momo reached into the pocket of her hoodie. She paused for a moment before pulling out the chocolate Jihyo had given her earlier. She placed it on the table, shoving it toward you.

“Wowww, so charming,” you teased, raising an eyebrow as you picked up the chocolate, unwrapping it with a playful smile.

Momo rolled her eyes dramatically, but she was secretly pleased. “Shut up, just take it,” she muttered.

You bit into the chocolate, letting out a hum of delight at the rich flavor. “Mmm, this is so good,” you sighed, before raising an eyebrow. “Aren’t these Jihyo’s chocolates?”

Momo hesitated for a second, her cheeks flushing again. “Uh... yeah... but she said I could have it... or something...” she trailed off, clearly not wanting to elaborate.

You smirked, teasing her again. “Sure you didn’t just steal it, huh?”

She quickly changed the topic, eager to avoid the embarrassment. “Okay, okay. Let’s go for another drive. There are some really cute light displays I wanted to show you. You’ll love them.”

You finished your cocoa with a smile, feeling lighter than before, and nodded eagerly. “I’m in,” you said, excited again. “Lead the way!”

Momo stood up and grabbed her jacket, offering her hand out to you with a smile. “Alright, let’s get out of here. The lights are waiting.”

You slipped your hand into hers, and together, you stepped out into the chilly night air, the car ride ahead feeling like the perfect distraction, filled with warmth, laughter, and—maybe even a little bit of magic.

Momo sat in the driver’s seat, her hands gripping the steering wheel tightly as you climbed back into the car. Your cheeks were flushed from the cold, but your eyes sparkled, still captivated by the lights you had just seen.

“These lights are so pretty,” you said softly, glancing out the window at the glow illuminating the snowy streets. Turning to her, you added with a small smile, “This is really nice... especially because I’m with you.”

Momo’s fingers twitched against the steering wheel, her heart skipping a beat. She tried to steady her breath, her eyes briefly flicking to yours before darting back to the road. “Really?” she asked, her voice quieter than she intended.

You nodded, resting your hands in your lap. “Yeah. It’s been a while since I’ve felt this... peaceful.”

She wanted to say something, anything, but the words caught in her throat. Just as she gathered the courage to speak, your phone buzzed, breaking the fragile moment. You sighed, pulling it out and staring at the screen. Jisung. Your stomach twisted as you hesitated, but ultimately, you answered.

“Hello?” Your voice lacked its usual warmth.

On the other end, Jisung’s tone was sharp and frustrated. “Y/N, we need to talk.”

“What’s left to talk about?” you replied, exhaustion lacing your words. “You broke up with me today, Jisung. On Christmas Eve.”

“I didn’t mean for it to be like that!” he snapped, his voice rising. “But you never listen to me—”

His words blurred together as your chest tightened, the overwhelming weight of the day catching up to you. You blinked rapidly, fighting back the tears burning your eyes. “I don’t have the energy for this,” you mumbled, your voice barely audible. But before you could say more, Momo leaned over and gently, but firmly, took the phone from your hand.

“She’s busy,” Momo said sharply into the receiver, her tone calm but edged with steel. Without waiting for a response, she hung up and set the phone down on the dashboard. You stared at her, stunned. “Momo, you didn’t have to do that—”

“Yes, I did,” she interrupted, her jaw tightening. Her eyes met yours, and for a moment, the intensity there made you forget to breathe. “He doesn’t get to talk to you like that. He doesn’t deserve you.”

Her voice was steady, but there was a tremble in her hands that gave her away. “You deserve so much more than someone who makes you feel like this, Y/N. Someone who cares about you, who treats you the way you deserve to be treated.”

You swallowed hard, her words striking something deep within you. “Momo...”

Her eyes softened, and she looked down at her lap, exhaling slowly. “If it were me,” she continued, her voice quieter now, “I’d treat you better than that.”

Her confession lingered in the air, heavy and unspoken until now. Your heart raced, and you turned to fully face her, your voice barely above a whisper. “Yeah?” Momo froze, realizing the weight of what she’d just said. Slowly, she lifted her eyes to meet yours, her vulnerability laid bare. “Yeah,” she admitted, her voice barely audible but sure.

The silence between you thickened, the atmosphere in the car charged. Outside, the city lights sparkled in the distance, but neither of you noticed.

“I want to kiss you right now,” Momo blurted, her voice cutting through the quiet. Your lips curved into the faintest smile, and you tilted your head slightly. “So do it.”

Her breath hitched, and for a moment, she hesitated. Then, she leaned in, her hand trembling as it came to rest gently against your cheek. Her lips brushed yours softly at first, testing, before pressing more firmly. The kiss was warm, tender, and filled with an unspoken emotion that made your heart ache in the best way.

The faint taste of chocolate and strawberry lingered between you, and when she pulled back, her forehead rested against yours. Her eyes fluttered open, searching yours nervously.

“I’ve wanted to do that for so long,” she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. You smiled, your fingers brushing against her cheek as you leaned closer. “Then don’t stop now.”

Her lips curved into a shy smile before she kissed you again, the city lights twinkling behind you as the night finally felt like Christmas.

The kiss deepened slowly, the initial tenderness giving way to something more urgent, more desperate. Momo’s hand slid from your cheek to the back of your neck, her fingers threading through your hair as she tilted her head to press closer. Her lips moved against yours with a quiet, restrained passion, as though she had been holding herself back for far too long but was afraid of overwhelming you.

Your hand found its way to her shoulder, gripping the fabric of her hoodie as if grounding yourself in the moment. Her other hand rested on your waist, fingers splayed like she couldn’t get enough of the feel of you under her touch.

The warmth in the car seemed to rise, the windows fogging slightly as her lips parted against yours, and you felt her breath mix with your own. There was a soft, almost inaudible sound from her throat, a hum of satisfaction that sent a shiver through you.

Your body leaned into hers instinctively, the space between you shrinking until there was hardly any left, swinging your legs over to straddle her lap. The kiss grew more insistent, her lips moving with a rhythm that felt like a conversation without words. She pulled you closer, and your chest pressed against hers, the tension thick and electric.

When you broke apart for air, both of you were breathing heavily, your faces still inches apart. Her dark eyes locked onto yours, filled with something raw and unfiltered that made your pulse race. Her thumb brushed against your jaw as if she couldn’t stop touching you, and her lips were slightly swollen, glistening from the kiss.

“Momo…” you whispered, your voice trembling with both nerves and anticipation.

Her eyes flicked to your lips, and she exhaled shakily. “I—” she began, but words seemed to fail her as her gaze returned to yours, her need palpable in the way her hands tightened their hold on you. “I want you.” she bit her lip lightly, “Please?”

You nodded lightly and she didn’t waste any time, latching onto your neck, a needy groan escaping her lips as she bit onto your skin. “Fuck, Momo..” you whined.

She continues to suck on your neck, her hands roaming under your shirt to toy with your chest almost possessively. She breaks away slightly, panting, "Let’s go to the back..."

You nod and she climbs into the backseat after you, a lustfilled glint in her eyes. She closes the door and locks it, ensuring privacy. She turns to face you, her gaze intense, yet you could see the slight nervousness on it. "Take off your shirt..."

You slip off your jacket before taking off your shirt, revealing your black bra that’s decorated with lace at the hems, Momo’s mouth practically drooled at the sight, “You’re so beautiful..” she muttered before pulling you closer, she pushed you down softly onto the cars door as she hovered over your body, kissing from your collarbone to your chest, swiftly unlatching your bra, almost like muscle memory.

She cursed under her breath at the sight of your bare chest and didn’t waste any time to latch on, putting her swollen lips onto one of your hardened nipples, a sensitive moan escaping your lips as your hands tangled onto her black hair, she hummed in delight, “Gosh Y/N-ie, you taste so good..” you whimpered as you grinded your clothed center on her thigh, a pout on your lip as you carressed her head.

“No ones fucked you like this before, no?” she kept sucking your tits as her hands fiddled on the buttons of your jeans. You shook your head, “Bet that shit-head of your boyfriend couldn’t make you feel good.” she bit softly onto your nipple, you threw your head back slightly. “Hnngh— n-no…” Momo chuckled softly “Yeah? couldn’t make your pretty cunt feel good?”

She digged her hand through your pants and began toying on your swollen clit through your underwear, “Couldn’t… satisfy me.—Nngh.”

“Gosh, you’re so wet, baby, so fucking cute, can’t wait to feel you inside me.” she smirked against your skin, leaving a path of wet kisses all over your collarbone and breasts. “Please, i need it Momo..”

“Yeah? you need me inside you? Fuck..” she slowly dipped her fingers in your wet cunt, moving your panties to the side as she tested the waters, letting you adjust to her length, you could see in her face she was holding back—holding back the urge to absolutely ruin you with her fingers, make you forget the existence of that shitty man from how good she was making that pussy feel.

She curled her fingers in deeper, her palm rubbing your clit from time to time, she pressed her lips on yours in a hungry kiss, a low husky growl leaving her lips as your moans vibrated against them, your sounds were like a vivid symphony to her, she craved more and more, the touch of your skin, the wetness and tight squeeze around her length, the smell of slight musk covered by your fruity perfume—she craved it all.

“Gosh i’ve wanted this for so long. I crave you, Y/N.” she moved her fingers in figure eights, “Wanted you so badly—wanted to have you like this.” she kissed your neck as she curled her fingers, inching them even deeper now, “Fuck—! Momo.. It feels so good!” she chuckled before speeding up her pace again, the muscles on her forearm flexing at every thrust. “Yeah? Unnie fucks your pussy good, right?”

“So fucking good—Gosh, fuckfuck fuck! Momo..” She practically ripped your pants off you, the garment flying somewhere to the passenger seat, your panties coming off with it too. “Good girl, baby.” she coos as she puts her tongue right on your pussy, both her fingers and tongue doing the work, your hand instinctively went to push her further into your cunt, her structured nose brushing against your clit, she smelled the scent of sex, your wetness—it was addicting.

Her chin was coated with a mix of her own saliva and your pussy juices. The sound of pornographic squelching, low groans and moans echoed through the cars exterior, you were so dripping wet she was sure she’d have to deep clean her car seat after this.

She grabbed your thighs, a rather harsh squeeze as she pushed you down onto her tongue, you began rutting your hips back and forth on her face, humping your cunt on it like a bitch in heat. It wasn’t long until you felt close, that knot form in your stomach, breathing getting heavier and moans going up an octave as your voice cracked. “Momo-nee, fuck…fuckfuckfuck— close, i’m fucking close.”

She spat on your cunt, “Yeah? cum for me, Y/N, keep moaning my name.” and you did as requested, vision turning white as you saw stars; eyes rolling to the back of your head as your body went into a slight spasm from your orgasm.

She helped you ride your high, seeing your face during orgasm and how pretty your back looked arched might’ve made her cum on the spot, untouched. “Gosh, you’re so pretty..” she pampered you with kisses all over your face and lips, tiny whiny giggles from the ticklish feeling leaving your lips.

Suddenly your face grew red and you avoided her gaze.

“Are you okay?” Momo’s eyebrows furrowed as she caressed your cheek, her eyes beady under the christmas moonlight. “I’m sorry if i pushed it, I…uhm.. we can pretend this never happened and I’ll—“

“No no, it’s okay. I liked it, a lot, It’s just…” you bit your lip out of hesitation “That was my first time with uhm.. a girl.”

Momo’s face grew red, she tried to speak up but only an exhale escaped her mouth, there was a moment of silence before you both giggled, “Come on, let’s go home before the girls think i drove you off a cliff or something.” She handed you your clothes and the blanket that was in the passenger before she jumped to the drivers seat, starting the engine and driving off while you got dressed in the back.

“I guess that chocolate really was useful after all.”

[4sturns]

H(ATE) YOU

enemy!chris s. x fem!reader

genre: smut

synopsis: you and chris do not get along. the both of you do the most to irk the other. but what happens when he has you under him, naked and moaning his name?

warnings: smut, pwp, oral (reader receiving), enemies to ???, hair pulling, empty threats (reader's a little violent), marking, chris is a masochist, dacryphila

a/n: y'all want a part two with messy, nasty, disgusting hate sex or nah ... also i had to rewrite literally half of this fic because tumblr crashed on me 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

if you were smart you wouldn't be here right now. you'd still be downstairs and enjoying the party just like everyone else. except you're not downstairs, instead you're upstairs in chris' bedroom, completely nude from the waist up and severely worked up.

you're unsure how you even got yourself into this situation. one second you were downstairs by the punch bowl, and the next you were dragged up the stairs and into his bedroom. maybe you shouldn't have provoked him.

chris hovers over you, his shirt discarded on the floor with yours. his breath is hot against your skin, his tongue licking at the sweet spot right under your ear. quiet moans leave your mouth at his motions causing him to smirk against you.

"keep smirking and i'll cut your dick off, sturniolo." you hiss at the boy. all he does in return is suck on your sweet spot, his teeth nibbling at the skin before pulling back to admire his work. a slightly red mark is left behind, though chris is sure it'll be blooming purple and yellow by the time he's done with you.

"maybe you should give my dick a try before saying such things, baby." chris sneers as he lowers his hands from your waist down to your clothed hips. his fingers hook around the belt loops of your jeans before he starts to slowly tug them down, his eyes fixated on yours.

"move faster or i'll do it myself." you throw your head back onto the pillow, breaking eye contact. you're tired of his teasing. you debate whether or not this is worth the fact you're missing out on the party downstairs, but your curiosity gets the better of you, making you stay put in chris' bedroom, your fate left completely in his hands.

"calm down, mamas. i'll give you what you want once you learn to tame that tongue of yours," chris finally gets your jeans off and haphazardly tosses them to the floor. "or you can use that tongue elsewhere." chris smirks.

"shut the fuck up." you snap back quickly.

you're left in your black lace panties which match your bra. your head comes back up to look chris in the eyes right as his teeth take a hold of the waistband of your panties, tugging them down and off of you at an agonizingly slow pace.

"holy shit, chris." you moan at the sight, noticing how much darker chris' eyes have gotten compared to the start of the night.

you can feel his breath against your skin, causing goosebumps to form in its trail. despite the obvious effect chris has on you, you refuse to let your guard down. you refuse to stroke chris sturniolo's ego. but you wouldn't really mind stroking his dick.

chris rids of your underwear, leaning back to place his feet back on the ground before reaching to undo his belt. he watches you as you watch his every move, as if you were daring him to keep going. and he's not one to back down from a dare.

"get your dick out before i cut it off, asshole." you spit through gritted teeth. although you know you don't mean it and chris does too. regardless, he quickens his movements, letting his pants fall to his ankles, revealing his boxers. they feel and look tight against him as his hard cock takes up any extra space. you'd never admit it to his face, but he seems quite big based off the imprint in his boxers.

he confirms this when he releases his throbbing member from the confines of his underwear, hissing when the hot tip touches the cold air. he's leaking from his tip already, presumably from the never broken eye contact he still holds with you.

when chris leans back down to get level with you on the bed, you can feel the temperature in the room start to rise. even if you won't admit it out loud, chris has already done a number on your body. he has barely done anything yet you're worked up beyond words and dripping onto his sheets.

"and for that you're not getting my dick," chris snickers, opting to slide lower onto the bed to settle between your thighs. you open your legs to him without protest, an action which makes chris break out into a smug smile and causing you to let out a huff before finally break eye contact to look at the ceiling.

"aren't you just eager, you pretty thing." chris mocks you, and you can only assume he noticed the wet spot on his sheets.

"i'll kick that look off your stupid face if you keep testing me. i'm dead serious, chris." with this, chris puts his hands up quickly in a mock surrender, something you only get a quick glimpse of before his hands settle back onto your thighs, gripping them firmly and pulling you closer to his mouth.

your heartbeat speeds up rapidly, beating so loud you're afraid chris can hear it. all you want to feel right now is his tongue on you, working at your folds and bringing you to that climax you need so badly.

an embarrassingly loud moan leaves your mouth as chris licks a long stripe up your folds, collecting your arousal. at this he hums, savoring the way you taste before his eyes find yours.

there's a difference between his eyes and yours. his are dark and pointed, while yours are a pure reflection of him. it's clear in your eyes that all you want is him. and he's gonna make you admit it tonight whether you like it or not.

he continues to work his tongue in and out of you, alternating between fucking you open with his tongue and kitten licking at your swollen clit.

a sneaky hand makes it way from your thigh to your entrance, two fingers collecting your slick before plunging into you.

"chris— fuck! just like that, keep going." you're whimpering as you squirm against chris' tongue, and all he can do is hum against you in response as your hands come down to pull harshly at his hair.

your thighs start to tremble in chris' grip. his fingers are working quickly inside of you, scissoring you open before angling them and curling right at your sweet spot. with every drag of his fingers combined with the feeling of his mouth sucking on your swollen clit, you know you won't last long.

you're holding back tears as you feel the coil in your stomach start to tighten. the grip on chris' hair tightens too, causing a muffled whine to vibrate against your clit. you buck your hips up as a long cry leaves your body.

"oh my god, chris, keep going. please don't stop, don't fucking stop— holy shit!" tears cascade down your face as your thighs begin to uncontrollably shake against chris.

chris takes a quick look at your face, noticing the river of tears. his eyes nearly roll into the back of his head as he works faster and harder. his fingers plunge in and out of you so violently that the wet sound of your arousal fills up the room along with your choked cries.

your grip on his hair only seems to get inhumanly stronger, causing him to let out more muffled whimpers and moans against your body. call him a masochist but he'll never get tired of the way you grip, tug, and pull at his hair. he'll always eat it up. chris feels his cock twitch, and he knows he's in deep shit.

it's not long before he starts to imagine what you'd look like crying on his dick, all pathetic and weak while you sob and cry for more.

with a choked sob and a vice grip on chris' hair, the coil in your stomach snaps. a wide variety of curses, cries, and incoherent sentences including chris' name leaves your body as you lose complete control of it.

you're violating shaking against the sheets as chris continues to finger fuck you through your high. loud whines come out from your gaping mouth and fill up the room. chris' mouth has left your heat a while ago, but with the grip you still have on his hair, he reminds in his place.

with a rather sharp pull of his hair, he lets out a strained, almost pornographic moan as his eyes flutter shut.

you immediately let go of his hair, using the little strength you've gained back from your intense orgasm to prop yourself up and into a sitting position. you inch forward, trying to get closer to the edge of the bed where chris sways in a trance.

from your view, you spot a small puddle on the floor. a cruel and mean smile reaches your face as you watch chris' thighs flex every so often. reaching forward, you quickly return your hand to chris' hair, tugging and pulling at it violently making him hiss and look up to meet your dark gaze.

"well, aren't you just eager, you pathetic little thing."

[mokkadere]

❝ Be Your Fix ❞ | Chapter One

A/N: I have too many ideas and too little time to write all of them. Sigh. Well, here you go - a small snippet of what could be yet another pretty long story. I'll probably break it down in snippets and one-shots displaying different scenarios + time jumps to experiment a little with this as well. Anyways, there are too few yandere doctor/psychologist/psychotherapist stories out there, so this is yet another contribution. :')

synopsis: yandere!psychologist (OC) keeps returning home to his lawyer!darling (OC) trying to cope with her mental struggles with alcohol instead of seeking his professional help. When will you learn?

this story includes the following themes: alcohol abuse + dependence, mental health struggles (intrusive thoughts, burnout, breakdowns, anxiety), manipulation, infantilization, obsessive behaviour / fixation, briefly mentioned self-harm

word count: 2.4k

Yandere!Psychologist Theo Reed who returned every evening from the ward to find his darling shivering against the warmest corner of the living room and clutching a bottle of wine.

You looked like such a mess with your unfocused gaze and helpless trembling, but at least he could call this mess his own. He'd never let you down and especially not now that you needed him this desperately.

With long strides, he walked up to you before sitting down on the floor and carefully scooping you into his arms. Even though the situation wasn’t exactly optimal, he loved keeping you close to him like this; he loved having you need him to make you whole again.

„Darling… You really have to stop doing this to yourself,“ he murmured into your ear as he slowly began to rock you back and forth, the steady rhythm stirring your mind awake. His hands - freezing from the December cold - soon found their way to yours, gently wrapping around them before taking away your liquid escape and putting it somewhere out of reach. You didn’t need cheap substitutes anymore, now that he was there to help.

He wanted to ground you. It’s been a long day, after all, and both of you deserved it. His softness slowly guided you back into reality, leaving this numb, hazy state that made you feel like you were hovering outside your body behind. „Come to me,“ he’d coo as he tucked you even closer into him, letting you listen to his heartbeat. You barely registered it but you felt his presence and that was enough for your body to find some respite from this self-induced numbness that now made your head spin. 

„H-Hey…“ you slurred as you nuzzled against his neck. Your voice had a certain rasp to it that usually wasn’t there. It seemed like this breakdown had done a number on you, leaving your throat sore. He made a mental note to make you some tea with honey. He’ll be your caretaker tonight.

„Hey, you,“ he mumbled into your ear before giving it a small peck, getting a small noise of satisfaction out of you. He lived for these noises. For them and for the way you squirmed in his arms when he did things to you. But he clearly couldn’t go there, not when you were so out of it, that is. Still, he couldn’t help but smile at your neediness, rewarding it with the kind of pets that always made your entire body tingle.

„I missed y-you…“ you whispered, your tone way too whiny to come out of your mouth on any other sober occasion but you couldn’t help it right now. If you weren’t so intoxicated, you would’ve died from embarrassment from how pathetic you sounded, but right now you were just too exhausted to care. You’ve been waiting for him for hours now, and you were quite literally desperate for him to do his magic and rearrange those broken parts that kept chipping time and time again off that usually so perfectly curated façade of yours.

„I can tell, baby. And I missed you too. Work is always so lonely because you’re not there. My mind constantly kept wandering to you, wondering if you were okay, if you were doing alright on your own… I wish you could’ve been there with me.“

He feels you nod against him, your nose tickling his neck. „H-How w-was work?“ you asked, barely able to string your question together. Every word was a struggle, but you liked struggling for him. Hearing his deep, calming voice in turn made it worth it to you.

„It was very busy, but also quite productive. Some of my patients are making great progress, actually, so I’m really proud of them. I’m sure you’d be proud of them too considering the fact that you were the one that negotiated in their favour in court.“

„Amalia? Reynolds?“

He nodded with a small smile. „But… what I’m way more interested in knowing is how your day went.“ At that he pulled away, letting his fingers tilt your chin up for him to look into your hazy eyes. His thumb rested on you lower lip for your hot breath to warm it. „Mind telling me what happened? Why are you sad again? I thought we agreed that you’d wait for me instead of drinking…“

You stammered countless slurred apologies as your eyes watered, telling him what you always did: that you were sorry, that you didn’t mean to go back on the promise, that you didn’t mean to disappoint him, that you’ll do better in the future, that you were sorry—

„I know you are, darling.“ His calm demeanour painted a stark contrast to the way words seemed to anxiously bubble out of you. „Let’s get you to bed where you can feel a bit more comfortable. That’s enough sitting on the cold, hard floor. You’ll get sick at this rate.“

You clung to him needily, your grip tight despite (or perhaps because of) how much the world was spinning.

Once he set you down on the plush blankets of your shared bed, he carefully cocooned you in them, wanting to make sure you were absolutely tended for while in this compromising state. He knew he’d done a good job when you hid a little further under the sheets, your eyes going half-lidded in comfortable satisfaction. 

You let a sleepy hum when you felt him hug your lower body, his head resting on your stomach - one of his favorite positions. It felt so nice to run your fingers through his silky brown locks while his hot breath caressed your sensitive skin. This soothing intimacy he managed to create between the two of you never failed to make you feel safe and cared for. It truly was the only thing that managed to quieten your constantly buzzing mind - it swirling with perpetual, unwanted thoughts.

„Talk to me, darling…“ he pressed once more. „What happened? Was it work?“

„No… ’s fine. I’m alright again… You’re here.“ While those words never failed to make Theo’s chest swell with this desperate need to protect you and to make sure you keep saying those words for years to come, he knew he should try digging deeper. You always did this, you always shot down any attempt at actually talking it out with him. Couldn’t you see how much that hurt him - to have all the necessary tools to help you in terms of knowledge of human psychology, but you refusing to let him in?

„Please… Just talk to me. I want to help you. I want you to be there for you.“ Theo kept quiet, hoping that perhaps the fact that you hated silence would make you open up more just to fill it. 

„I’m sorry…“ you whispered once more, making Theo sigh before he pulled himself up to spoon you, making a wave of warm tingles spread throughout your numb body. 

„I just wish you’d share with me. It breaks my heart to keep finding you trembling from nerves every evening, clutching those bottles. It’s… unlike the strong and confident woman I married.“ He hesitated saying that last sentence, knowing that you hated being compared to your old selves, the very thought of you having changed for the worse and having lost a perfectly good version of yourself along the way causing you anxiety.

For a long while you didn’t say anything and he figured you might’ve dozed off at this point. It certainly wasn’t the first time you did that. Wine made you sleepy quickly like that, and while he found it adorable, he found it equal parts frustrating. He was about to leave bed to make you some tea for when you inevitably woke up an hour later, but then you finally spoke up hesitantly: „I don’t know how to explain it without sounding absolutely unhinged…“

„Come on, try me,“ Theo countered, feeling hopeful.

„It’s like my brain is constantly screaming at me to do or not to do something - constantly buzzing, nagging, always making me so anxious that my entire body starts t-to shake,“ you whispered, those long unsaid words finally being splayed in the open. Faint anxiety began to creep into your voice once more. It felt numb, but it still lingered, threatening to spill over once the wine’s soothing effect has been washed away from your system completely. „I feel messed up. Fifty percent of the time I’m so frustrated because there’s so much work for me to do, so many cases to look over and so many letters to write, and my mind keeps yelling at me to keep going and going and going— to just do one more thing, despite having said that ten things ago, despite feeling like I’m running on fumes.“ 

You drew a shaky breath, feeling defeated by your own words. It hurt to admit things like that. You knew what you had just said, it didn’t require a psychology degree to recognize symptoms of burnout for what they were.

„My darling girl… come here.“ Theo murmured into your ear as he pressed you closer to his body, and you would’ve pulled away like a child and glared at him for patronizing you like that but you didn’t have the energy to put up a fight this time. You just let him hold you tightly, finding a comfortable sense of calm in the way he petted your head affectionally. 

It was clear to him that you needed his help — not just as your husband but as your doctor, too. He didn’t mind taking hours off to care for you, far from it. He welcomed it, with excitement even. He’s always wanted to have you as his little patient, for what was more beautiful than healing his own most treasured person the way you had healed him?

He felt a tiny bit bad that a part of him longed for this broken version of you, when he knew just how unhappy you were with your vulnerability. He loved you, he cared for you and he didn’t want you to suffer a second of your life. In fact, if he were to decide, you’d forever life in bliss, just you and him forever and ever with no distractions… ah, how perfect that would be. Perhaps bliss could be him taking care of you, if only you would let him.

But you were so damn stubborn with the way you kept to yourself like this, bottling your feelings up until they exploded in your face in the form of yet another destructive breakdown, and making him question time and time again if he should maybe just hurry and lock you at the hospital to take care of you better. You absolutely needed his professional attention, that much he knew. In fact, you’ve been needing it for a long time now.

He’s known you for 6 years now and even in the beginning he was able to tell that you had some underlying issues tied to your work ethics specifically. 

What had begun as quiet admiration for your ambition and will to work hard and succeed didn’t take long to morph into worry whenever he saw you study until exhaustion, pulling one allnighter after the other. Sometimes he couldn’t tell whether blood or coffee was primarily coursing though your veins, with the way you chugged one Americano after the other to sustain your absurd lifestyle. Either way, you were too jittery by default for him to come to a solid conclusion. 

Still, in the back of his mind he always kept thinking that it wasn’t normal how much you obsessed over your work and how badly you stressed yourself out over achievements and academics. Pacing for countless hours in your room, surely trying to figure what’s wrong with you if your google history was anything to go by; crying yourself to sleep whenever you had tears to spare; hurting yourself when you didn’t have any because of the sheer numbness and resignation that were accumulating within you - all these symptoms were worrisome, to put it mildly. But all that disappeared once you got your fix, just for everything to start anew in the next semester. And now you perpetuated this cycle by applying those distructive habits to your work and even escalating them in the form of alcohol abuse.

He never addressed the fact that he was indeed aware of your hyper-fixation on success and your clear need to do everything in your power to achieve it, mainly because it didn’t make sense to do so in his mind. Countless strained discussions between the two of you have shown that you were the type of person that needed to experience a burn first hand for the lesson to stick (and that wasn’t even guaranteed), so he figured that he just had to wait and support you until you inevitably wore yourself out. He just never would’ve thought that it would take six years for that to happen. 

Needless to say, he was truly amazed by your year-long resistence to the way you were torturing your own mind, but now it was time to rest. He’s always known that you were the strongest person he’s ever had the honour of knowing, yet your strength was paradoxically also creating a blind spot in your psyche that let a special kind of fragility to fester.

One that he’s always been meant to mend to perfectly match his own.

„Don’t worry, my Ana, I’ll help you feel like before. Just rest for now… You trust me, don’t you?“

[bitletsanddrabbles]

But What If I Wasn't Rich?

Right. So. With revisions on Stolen Child going well, I've tried to start gearing up for my next big project, which is what I'd planned on working on this month. It's a very different tone - lots of zany hijinks with a group of idiots going through the jungles of India looking for biologically impossible flora - so I figured it shouldn't need too much in the way of research, especially since I'm avoiding politics like the plague. Don't know how much I'll manage, mind, since the only reason I can think of for Thomas's cousin to be in Bombay is military, but I'm pretty confident I can just say that and let my historically well informed audience fill in their own blanks while I concentrate on more important things, like cobras that spit hydrochloride acid at people*.

For all of that, though, I am having problems right off the bat with the research. Why? Because I need to get a disgraced-with-no-reference Thomas from Downton Abbey to Bombay, and I need to do it via a land route (or mostly at any rate), because he needs to start the whole thing off by crashing into someone in a train station. I suppose it could technically be at a port, but the train station just seems more likely given that the person in question is trying to get to the Congo.

This should not be difficult to figure out, right? A couple of Google** searches and you're done.

Well, not so much. When I search for how to get from England to India in 1920, the search engines seem to think I'm curious about immigration in the late 1800s. The closest I've come is an article that outlines the sea route around Cape Horn that was utilized the early 1900s...and stops there.

There was one (1) Reddit thread that popped up from someone with a similar problem who had the route mostly mapped but was just missing a bit in the middle. It started with the Orient Express.

Okay! Time to look up the Orient Express! And we get...

An absolute ton of information on the very big, very famous luxury liner of trains! Yes'sir, the Orient Express got you from Paris to Istanbul in style like you wouldn't believe! All of the rich people were lining up to bask in the lap of luxury as they made this cross land trip!

...

...which was probably beyond the budget of a newly sacked valet...

Pretty certain.

So we start looking for other ways to get from Paris to Istanbul in 1920 and apparently you could...walk? Or something? Maybe hitch hike?

Yeah, there's nothing. I can not come up with a search that does not tell me about the Orient Express, but unless Thomas ties himself to the roof, I don't see him getting aboard that one.

So! Are there any travel experts out there who have insight? Or people who have faced this issue in their fanfiction? Researchers with a hyper fixation on Agatha Christie? Banana cream pie? I'm kinda hungry, I could go in for some banana cream pie.

Heck, I'd settle for a less politically volatile reason for Thomas's cousin to be in residence, although I'm going to have to at least touch on the BEF*** for plot reasons.

*our fauna is as biologically impossible as our fauna

**or, well, Duckduckgo, but that doesn't roll off the tongue as nicely

***at least I assume that's who was stationed there. Again really, really not interested in politics. At all. Ever. Plague on the planet.

[maylovessyou]

Part 2 - nightmare

Sooo... Finally the 2nd part, I've been a week abroad and didn't have much time to write, as soon as I got back home I finished this part, I strongly believe there will be like at least 3 more and as always I hope you all enjoy it very much! Reposts are really appreciated!!

Tw: afab, cursing/fowl language, name calling, tell me if I missed any

Word count: 1,550

He just stays there, a smirk imprinted on his face "so that's what you think of me, Honigbiene?" He asks tilting his head.

You quickly turn around facing him with fear in your eyes "I... Uhm.." you stutter, ashamed of what he's heard.

"I'll snap your back in half if I ever hear you talking about me like that, kleine Hure." He threatens through gritted teeth.

"I... I'm sorry, König.. just..." You try to explain yourself tho you couldn't find any valid reason.*

He looks at you with nothing but apathy on his face and walks away, grabs the lighter and cigarettes on the counter and rushes outside to have a smoke. You look at him both perplexed and angry, why would he take *your* cigarettes without asking? Or even caring?

You try to ignore it and run after him to get your stuff back. When you get outside you find him lighting a cigarette and looking at you with a smirk.

"What do you want, Hure?" He growls. "I'm not a whore, if anything you're the one that fucks every living thing." You spat back at him, his face contorting into a pissed frown.

"Watch your tongue before I'll cut it off." His words harsh as ever, tho their effect on you is minimal, after all this time how could it be any other way? Yea?

You get back inside, forgetting about your belongings and most of all ignoring him.

You take out your phone and look for something to make for dinner, somehow, somehow, you still manage to have a soft stop for his wellbeing, and that only.

You find some sort of pizza pockets that you think you'll like so you start making them, by the time you've finished baking them it's become 7pm.

You plate them on the table and look for him, first in the living room, then outside, then his room. Nowhere to be found.

"The cunt left?" You ask yourself aloud shaking your head in disappointment and turning around to get the cutlery, only to find him there, grabbing you by your nape.

"What did I tell you about calling me names? Huh?" He yells, the height difference, force and brutality different and age difference makes you shiver from fear. Hatred leaking eyes pierce through you, leaving you tremble.

"Answer, Honigbiene." He yells again, your eyes widening.

"I... I was just worried... Yea.. worried." You babble, trying to sound convincing.

His grip loosens though he keeps your eyes fixated on him. "No one taught you manners? Useless bitch." He looks down on you, almost feeling disgusted.

You quickly wiggle off his grasp and just look at him, rubbing where he left a sore mark. "I was calling you to eat. Just trying to be gentle. But you're clearly not worth it." You said feeling repulsed by him and going to your room, just as far as you can from that monster of a man.

König, on the other hand, took it more easy. It was fun to mess with you, make you feel bad, sad, angry, make you cry. He simply sat on a chair and ate the food you made, like nothing had just happened.

After an hour or so he comes up to your door "I like ya cooking, who taught you?" He grunts, feeling like an animal.

You hear his voice, oh you do, but you also don't do or say anything. Complete silence. Ignorance too.

"Hey I'm talking to you, Honigbiene." He scowls, your avoidance pissing him off.

"Go away." You whisper, just enough for him to hear. And hopefully do as said.

But he doesn't. Why would he? He's the man right? He got the pants. So he bangs on your door, hard. "Open up, ja?" He smirks, thinking he's having control over you, but still, you don't say anything.

After some time he decided he's had enough, so what's better than just breaking in? Knocking down the door? Easy. The first thing that comes to his mind tho isn't to break down the door, maybe you didn't lock it, right? Right? Right.

He simply wiggles the knob and boom! He's inside. Your figure way smaller than him, any size is smaller than him. Just a little mouse hunted by the cat. No, a tiger in this case.

You stay there, scrunched up by the headboard, your phone and headphones by your side. "Go out." You whisper, the fear that König instills in you has no words capable of describing. "Please.." you add, you're voice sounding weaker than usual.

"What? The little girl's gonna cry now?" He says in a mocking, degrading tone, not caring to pick his words correctly.

You just look at him, speechless, scared, fragile even. Only a moment after you take your gaze off him, looking down at where your knees and chest meet, trying to ignore your now flooded waterlines.

König just looks at you, the pathetic state you're in, feeling nothing but superiority. "Look at me when I speak." He demands, his voice stern as always, but you're unable to. Certainly not when you're on the verge of tears.

You slightly raise your head up, enough for your eyes to meet his, and then you see him. A wide smirk plastered on his face, the bastard enjoying the torture he's giving you.

"Don't cry now. I bet you've gotten hurt in worse ways, Honigbiene." He tries to sound sympathetic and cover the mock in his voice, of course, he doesn't succeed.

"Please just leave.." you plead once again, you're voice shaking and lips quivering, eyelids becoming heavier by the second.

He looks at you up and down one last time before exiting the room, closing the door with a loud slam.

Night falls and you're still in your bed, drenched in tears of fear and broken heart, not because of him directly, but because of the way he treats you. You've done everything you could to make this agonizing stay a little less hard, but he hasn't put any effort, no, on the other hand he has just gotten worse and worse.

At around 1am you decide to get up and take a shower, refresh yourself, get something under the teeth, hopefully be alone. At least now.

And you do so, after you've finished showering you just walk down to the kitchen and heat out the leftovers of the dinner you cooked, careless to get dressed. After all, you were sure you were alone.

You take the plate and sit at the table, slowly eating the food and sipping water, the headache you've had until now slowly vanishing.

After finishing you rub your eyes and slightly stretch, "this is a nightmare... A very big, tall and strong nightmare." You say to yourself, your head resting in your palms.

"As if you were a dream." You hear a voice say right behind you.

Taglist: @Lillumrorum , @captainsarcasmandsass , @attractivesteaminghunkofflesh69 , @notyoursweetcat

[animehouse-moe]

Mobile Suit Gundam - The Witch From Mercury S2 Episode 8: The End of Hope

So, last episode was violence on earth, and this episode is violence in space! What do we call that? A cycle! That's right. Good old Gundam, perpetuating violence through one sided fixations on the other's wrongdoings, which is perfectly personified through Shaddiq in this episode. Lots of stuff to talk about for sure!

This episode is interesting in that sense, it's less methodic and progress focused than the previous, almost catching you off guard as you shift from the norm towards combat. Regardless of that though, Shaddiq is a total piece of work through it all. It's pretty incredible.

The Earthian boy that allowed space to get to his head. Shaddiq was an orphan from Earth who worked his way up through Grassley to get a spot at Astacassia, and is now using it "to his advantage" to bring equality and power back to the hands of Earthians. What he doesn't, and will probably never realize, is that he's only serving to exacerbate it by perpetuating exactly what his adoptive forefathers did. In a terrible twist of fate, all Shaddiq is able to do is dirty the lives of others. He forces Guel to kill his own father to survive, he forces Miorine to dirty her hands because she doesn't want to be owned by Shaddiq, and he ruins the lives of such an innumerable amount of people that you can't begin to quantify it. All because he wants to bring peace and equality to Earth. But he can never understand his actions. He could never understand what it's like to kill your own father, what it's like to watch on as violence is incurred in your name. And this episode illustrates that incredible well, that Shaddiq is a Spacian, more than any of these other characters he despises, as his words completely betray him.

His entire existence is centered around his ability to bring their own lives back into the hands of Earthians, but he entirely misses the point. All he does is take advantage of. He takes, and takes, and takes some more, and offers nothing but hellfire and brimstone to the people that he wants to help. He brings oppression, violence, sanctions, all manner of terrible fates to the people he cares about, because the scope of his desire is so narrow. He wants to erase the past that he existed in, rather than focus on the future moving forward. In that sense, he plays a very solid second fiddle to Prospera (and raises up Guel even more, which I'll touch on later), as their foolish grasp on history blinds them to the atrocities that they commit in their names.

Just a quick little interlude here as the grounds of Astacassia are under attack during Guel and Shaddiq's fight. I thought this was a really great piece to appear in it. Miorine's tomato greenhouse was destroyed. Not by gundvolvas or even Norea herself, but someone defending Astacassia from her. What a sad, sad fate. A peaceful existence, quashed not by the enemy, but the people she might even call allies. Such a throwaway piece, but one that speaks to the boundless and senseless act of violence. To how inescapable it can be, to both sides of the conflict.

Anyways, back to Guel and his hubris. The sheer mockery that is his existence is palpable. "If you didn't get expelled from the school, if you didn't try to make things right and help out Plant Quetta during a terrorist attack, if you didn't try to thwart my plans, your father would still be alive, if you didn't fight to be a better person, my Miorine would still be clean.". Shaddiq embodies more selfishness than Guel could ever manage to muster in his existence. Even as the self-centered Holder of Astacassia, he could never stoop to the depths that Shaddiq inhabits.

And that's illustrated perfectly here. Shaddiq blames everybody around him for everything that has happened to him. Despite being the leading son of the Grassley House. Despite having the tools to change the world at his fingertips if he so wanted. He believes he needs to deliver power to the Earthians, through terror and violence that incurs the wrath of Spacians. Despite the peaceful approach that Gund-ARM desired, despite the wishes and fears of Guel, at each step he has refused to use his power, and relies on that of the group. He relies on their reactions to violence, he relies on the hatred of Spacians by the inhabitants of Earth. He only uses his power to take from those around him, and in turn drags them further into this abyss.

Then there's this moment. This line from Shaddiq. The sheer hubris of it is hilarious. And Guel destroys it right away.

The difference in wording speaks volumes. Shaddiq could only ever acknowledge what he's doing. He can sit and there and say, "I did some bad things for the sake of Earthians", and immediately, he absolves himself of it because of why he did it. Guel, on the other hand, chooses to carry that weight with him for the rest of his life. The inescapable burden of his father's death, of that girl dying in his arms, of his inaction and what it's led to. He refuses to justify his sins in the bigger picture. And that dissonance extends to the girls around Shaddiq, as they speak of "silver spoons" while piloting their top of the line Gundams, as they sortie from the incredibly exclusive and highly expensive Astacassia school ran by Spacians.

Then there's this last part from Guel is just outstanding. Given the context of Shaddiq and his crew being out for blood, Guel's effort in bringing in the Grassley House unharmed just further widens the ocean's width between the two characters. I especially love it because it speaks to exactly what I was saying so far about Shaddiq, and because it's Guel's version of the words that Suletta gave him.

And to finish off the Shaddiq content of this episode, we have Sarius. His forced passivity through this all, in concert with this comment, speak volumes to his feelings of it. He's lived through this before, he's experienced similar issues and challenges, and he knows where this path will lead to. But in the end, he remained powerless and oblivious to the plight of his son. It's rather depressing to see the resignation on his face at his failure in raising Shaddiq.

Now then, we can move onto Norea and Elan! What an interesting pair, I do think that Norea's character is a bit overblown than need be for he purpose, but there's still plenty of great moments. I really like how despite her hatred of mobile suits and Gundams, the only thing that she thinks she has left is to pilot them. Through her short life, all she could do at the end of it was fight, she could never find a way to run, to leave behind those feelings of hatred and resentment for the life that she was forced into.

And Elan can't help but intervene. The Elan that would only ever run away, only ever fight to preserve his own life, is drawn to Norea. Forced to pilot for the sake of others, relinquishing their chances at a normal life because of the selfishness of Spacians, the pair find common ground in losing their lives and passions to capitalist money machine that is the Benerit Group. I think it's a really great and emotional moment, to bring the puppet of a clone of Peil Technologies, and the child soldier of the Dawn of Fold together in their desire to flee their lives and discover something outside of their current existences. Sadly, this Elan has his chance, but Norea's fate has already been sealed due to her actions.

Finally, we arrive at the end of the conflict. A mass of rubble and bodies litter the ground from the conflict as we find Suletta on her own moving earth to try and help the people beneath it. I think it's a really important piece, both in regards to Suletta and the relations between Earthians and Spacians at Astacassia. Though they're meant to be cogs in the cycle of perpetuated violence and control, some of the students at this school have found ways to connect with one another past the boundaries of Earth and Space. Working together to defend Astacassia, or helping save injured students, or removing those trapped from the rubble. It speaks to the passion and desire to good that the Earthians aboard Astacassia have spread and infected those around them with. Alongside Suletta, they've broken the curse of Prospera's words, and in doing so, have helped free Suletta. Without Aerial, without her mother or Miorine or any of the other crutches that brought her this far, she remains in the dark, with bloodied and bruised hands, searching for life amidst the destruction.

It's an astoundingly good GWitch episode, and moves the characters forward in incredible ways. Shaddiq's hubris arrives at his doorstep as Guel find vindication in bringing him to justice, while Norea makes peace with the life that was stolen from her that Elan carries onwards, and Suletta and the Earth house continue their calling of peace and helping others even in spite of the atrocity that was committed in the name of their company.

The cycle of violence leaves nobody untouched, but it doesn't mean you must succumb to it. This episode speaks to that greatly. That you are justified in your hate and resentment for what life has done for you, but that you also hold the tools within your own hands to change that. To rally against it and make a difference, to speak out against those actions and to fight to find ways to break that cycle. Whether it's within the scope of the school you go to, or the whole of humanity.

[nar-nia]

hoodie season

heeseung x fem!reader

warnings: none

word count: ~1k

~~~

Heeseung always knew what he had to do to cheer you up. You didn't know how he did it, maybe it was a magic ability, but he always made you feel better in one way or the other. And you desperately needed that today.

"Hey baby." You didn't even have time to answer after opening the door, before Heeseungs arms were wrapped around you. "How are you."

You returned the embrace, pressing your boyfriend even closer to you to take in his warmth. "Could be better."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Just a stressful day." You buried your head deeper into his hoodie "I missed you."

"I missed you too. Have you eaten?"

"Just breakfast," you mumbled. "I wanted to wait for you so we could eat together."

You felt his lips pressed against the top of your head, a sweet gesture before he suddenly wrapped one arm around your legs to pick you up. "Let's change that right now, hmm."

You let out a squeal of surprise, arms wrapping around the back of his neck to prevent you from falling down again. "What are you doing?"

"Making us food," he grinned. "How about ramen?"

A smile lit up your face while you nodded. "Sounds perfect."

"Perfect like you," Heeseung smiled. He took advantage of the fact that you were looking up at him, his lips softly connecting with the tip of your nose. Your cheeks were almost instantly covered in a deep blush, your face now pressed against Heeseungs shoulder.

"Like you, you mean."

"I meant exactly what I said," he grinned. In the kitchen he sat you down before he went through your drawers, picking out two packages of ramen. "Are those okay?"

You nodded, watching him in comfortable silence while he prepared everything. This wasn't the first time he cooked ramen in your kitchen, so his hands were moving in confidence and it didn't take long until you had a steaming bowl in front of you.

"Do you want to watch something while we eat?"

You nodded, grabbing the bowl while you dragged Heeseung along. "I already know what to watch."

A small groan could be heard behind you - an indicator for what's about to come, words you already heard a lot of times before. "No en o' clock please."

"Yes en o' clock," you grinned, dragging him to the couch. "Please."

"Y/n…" he sighed.

"Pretty pretty please." You looked up at him with big eyes, a pleading look in them - and you knew he couldn't say no anymore.

"Okay. But only because I love you so much."

You grinned, pressing a small kiss onto his lips before you got comfortable on the couch. "Mwuahh. I love you too."

He just shook his head, but you could see the slight smile on his face.

A short while later you had settled onto the couch, your eyes fixated on the screen. You loved watching those episodes. And even though Heeseung always kept getting embarrassed and claimed he didn't want to see it, you were sure he was secretly enjoying it too. Maybe not the episode itself, but you would regularly catch him looking at you, face lighting up with happiness and love seeing you enjoy watching him so much.

"Are you cold?" Heeseungs words grabbed your attention, his eyes focusing on you. "You're shivering."

"Oh - a bit." You shrugged. "I think I'm coming down with a cold or something."

"No what?" Before you could fully realize what was happening Heeseung had already taken off his hoodie, handing it towards you. "Wear it."

"What.” You blinked at him one, two, three times, your brain trying to comprehend what was happening. "Why are you shirtless."

"So my girlfriend can take my hoodie and not get a cold. Wear it please."

You took it, still stunned when you put it over your head and pulled it down. "Won't you be cold now though?"

"Stop worrying so much," he chuckled. "I'll just cuddle with you instead."

"Okay…" You were still hesitating, but surrounded by the warm fabric you instantly felt warmer, snuggling into it. "Thank you."

"It suits you," Heeseung smiled. "You should keep it."

"Nooo." You stared at him. "No."

"Yes." He swiftly pulled you closer to press a quick kiss onto your lips, before he wrapped his arms around you. "Keep it."

Your sounds of protest were muffled when he pulled you against his chest, one hand creeping under the hoodie.

"Hey!"

"What is it?" His eyes feigned innocence, but the big smirk on his face showed that he knew exactly what you meant. "Your boyfriend is cold, y/n. Don't you want to help him?"

You were speechless. Especially when you felt a second hand moving towards your stomach, a thumb drawing small circles onto it. But you couldn't help but melt into the touch - something that you could imagine caused another smile on Heeseungs face.

"Just cold, huh."

"Just cold." You could even hear the smile in his voice.

You tried to fight down your own smile, instead hiding more in the hoodie while you pushed your focus back onto the tv that still showed an en o'clock episode. Time passed in silence, Heeseungs presence spreading a comfortable warmth through your body, your eyes slowly closing - until you saw one of Heeseungs hands creeping towards the tv remote.

"What are you doing?"

It froze midair, as if Heeseung had to debate if he should accuse you of having delusions or just admit that he had tried to turn the episode off. Both of you knew anyway that it was the latter.

"Just… trying to turn the volume higher."

"Mhm." Now it was your turn to grin. "You're an awful liar."

"And you love tormenting me."

"I do. But you love me."

It was quiet for a second. You turned your head to look at Heeseung, trying to figure out why he suddenly turned silent, when you saw his face right in front of yours, a knowing grin on his face.

"What-"

"I love you." And with that his lips were suddenly onto yours, trapping you in a kiss that almost made you forget about the tv - almost.

"We will still finish that episode."

The kiss was stopped abruptly, a groan escaping his lips. "Whyyyy."

You grinned. "Because you love me."

~~~

guess who's back 🥲 i didn't even mean to be ia for so long but life has just turned stressful and there were so many things to do that i had barely time for anything. but that will hopefully change again now and i will be able to be more active again. starting with this little story, i hope you enjoyed!

permanent taglist: @maeum-your @suneonu @hoonsmarsbar @soobin-chois @sjyuniverse @taekbokki

[otomiyaa]

do you have any ToT fics?

Mr. Mouse

Lee!Marius & NXX Squad ft. Reader

[Fic Reupload] - Haha I thought you were crying but then thought oh right I've been sharing Tears of Themis posts lately. Well I've got one, only one, apart from some drabbles scattered around. I'll reupload the fic ^^ It's not lee Luke though, but Marius. (Also on AO3)

Word Count: 3.1K

The mood was dark and heavy. Though it had been your intention to shift the team’s focus off the complex investigation case just for a little, you did not expect it would arise new complications.

All you had done was suggest a funny game for some team bonding, fun, and to have a laugh, since there was just too much tension in this team and definitely not enough laughter. Alas, there was little to no laughter at all as the men glared at each other, even while playing the game. 

"Guys...” you whispered, watching them nervously. 

Even with those stupid cards sticking to their foreheads it didn’t look at all like the lighthearted situation it should be. Marius and Artem were exchanging death stares as if they could fly over the table any second and clash. Vyn appeared to be judging their behavior quietly, a little pile of successfully guessed cards of his own proudly placed before him as he stared at the duo with piercing eyes. And Luke...

“Luke,” Marius suddenly called out, glancing sideways at Luke who was, just like you were, observing the two nervously. “I’ll ask again, Luke. Am I Mr. Artem Wing?” Marius asked. Luke was stuttering, but couldn’t get in between them again with a firm ‘no’ or anything else, given the tense atmosphere.

Marius already continued to speak: “Summarizing all of your answers, I am a male, I am old, I am not big, but I do have big earsー”

“Mr. Wing does not have big ears though,” you whispered, but Marius didn’t hear and continued.

“You are also an animal, Marius. You are forgetting a key part of the interrogation,” Vyn said in all seriousness. You should have known. There was no such thing as playing a fun and simple game of Who Am I? with the NXX gang. 

“Ah, an animal. Right. I stick to my guess. Mr. Wing is also kind of an animal,” Marius said, shrugging. Artem glared.

“Your insults are getting less and less creative. I suggest you proceed with more clever guesses, or you should just give up and admit you cannot guess the character,” he said. Ah, these two really weren’t getting along! Still, it was hard to fight back your giggles as you felt your lips twitch unwillingly. 

On Marius’ forehead was the card that said ‘Mickey Mouse’ and for the past ten minutes it had been him trying to guess the name which was not that difficult. From Elvis to Sherlock Holmes, Harry Potter, Leonardo da Vinci, Darius Morgan, Phoenix Wright and Mark Zuckerberg, everyone else including yourself had already finished some interrogation rounds successfully and guessed the right names. 

It was just Marius who was still Mickey Mouse for such a long while since the start of the game that all of you had decided to focus your attention on him alone until he would guess it right. Though usually enjoying to be in the spotlight, Marius did seem to get annoyed and had been trying to wriggle his way out of it by provoking Artem.

“Ask more about the animal’s nature,” Vyn suggested. 

“Or his career,” Luke said.

Marius rolled his eyes, a confused look on his face that said ‘an animal’s career?’ but he sighed and growled, “Fine. Am I a monkey?” 

“No,” chirped Luke.

“Am I a cat? Or a dog?”

“No and no,” Vyn said. 

“A fish?” You shook your head at him. Marius made a wild gesture with his hands.

“A bear?” 

“Nope,” Artem said. There was definitely something smug about Artem’s attitude, and unfortunately Marius did not miss this. He lunged towards him and sneered, “Ah I see. You thought of a difficult name for me, just to finally have something I am not better at. Hm?” 

“Just keep guessing, Marius,” you tried gently, but Marius was fixated on Artem again and you were kind of relieved that he didn’t catch Luke’s very soft “It’s not that difficult though...” because if he did, Luke would be enjoying all of that attention that was going to Artem now.

“Looks like we’ll still be here tomorrow,” was Artem’s calm remark, sparking Marius’ irritation again. There had been something mischievous about the usual serious Artem all day, something childish yet not more childish than Marius himself, and you were torn between amusement and fear of this all escalating into something bad. 

“Rosa~ Help me out here? They are bullying me,” Marius whined like a child, pouting at you. It was hilarious how he really did seem at loss with this game, and it didn’t even seem to cross his mind that you were the one who came up with the idea to play this in the first place. Or better, that it was your very own hand that wrote the name 'Mickey Mouse' for Marius to guess.

“Just keep on guessing. You are really close,” you encouraged him. He wasn’t close though. You could tell Marius had still no idea.

“Perhaps he will need a hand,” Vyn said. Marius let out a sudden guffaw. 

“Oh you guys are loving this aren’t you? The only way you guys can beat me is with silly games, or maybe even a prank. I’m not gonna be surprised if I take this off and there’s no name on it. It’s getting shady, why am I the only one who’s an animal?” Marius said, grabbing at the card on his forehead, but Luke reached out swiftly and caught his arm.

“Hey, don’t take it off now!” the brunet warned. Marius was sort of right. The guys were enjoying the hilarity of Marius failing at something as simple as a guessing game, but there was no prank going on here. Marius really failed gloriously and you couldn’t blame them - especially Artem - for rubbing salt into the wound.

“See? You don’t want me to see you’re fooling me huh?” Marius said, trying to pull his arm free from Luke who held him with both hands, but Marius reached for the card again with his other hand. This time Vyn got up fast and stood behind Marius, where he grabbed both his arms and moved them behind the seat. 

“You are going to play fairly, Marius. This’ll be a temporary measure to make sure you do,” he said, taking off his own tie and using it to bind his hands behind the chair. Marius laughed out loud again.

“Come on now! As if you guys are playing fairly! This is so childish!” 

“Or you are the childish one. Just because you are finally bad at something doesn’t mean it isn’t fair. You’ll have to accept you can’t be good at everything,” Artem lectured. 

“Oh yeah? Well, it’s not that I don’t want to play a game, I just don’t want to cooperate with your pranks! I’m going home,” Marius said, but Vyn tightened the light bondage on Marius’ hands and said: “Oh but you’re not going anywhere. And it’s not a prank, Marius. It is a fair game.”

“Rosa, help!” Marius made a scene on purpose, still smug and at the same time dramatic about the whole situation, and you shook your head at him.

Vyn sat down again, but Luke leaned towards Marius and poked him teasingly between the ribs.

“I’ll give you a hint. The sort of animal you are tends to get stuck by human traps as well,” he said, but the poke caused a different reaction than everyone expected. Marius literally squeaked. 

Your eyes widened. Marius von Hagen.... Could he be.... Ticklish? Judging from the look on Artem’s face, he seemed to notice too.

“The animal makes a similar sound too,” he said, poking Marius as well from the other side, making him squeak again.

“EEP!”

“The animal does, but the character does not make such a sound,” Luke said, watching how Artem’s single finger poked Marius not one, not two, but three more times.

“Haha-hands off, Artem, you don’t want to face the consequences once I get out of this,” Marius argued, dancing uncomfortably. 

“Hm.  That’s… quite an attitude for someone in your position,” Artem retorted, and this time he made a claw of his hand, digging his fingers into Marius’ torso and getting him to let out another lovely squeak. Luke snickered.

“Shall we tickle him?  he suggested, wiggling his fingers. 

“We could. Until he guesses it right.” 

It was hard to believe what was happening here. You saw how both Artem and Luke surrounded Marius who sat tied to his chair thanks to Vyn’s bondage skills, and their fingers started to poke and prod his sides. Marius threw his head back, the card sticking to his forehead like magic while he let out the loudest most hysterical giggles.

“GAhaha-guhuhuys! Y-you ahahar the wohohorst!” 

You gaped at them and exchanged looks with Vyn. He was smirking. “Amused aren’t you?” he murmured while in the background, Marius continued to laugh because of Artem and Luke tickling him. Artem was calm and collected, tickling Marius with this concentrated look as if he was some kind of work project. Luke was much more playful and smug about it.

“Heehee, take that! Well, aren’t you gonna guess?” he sang.

You chuckled at Vyn. “Yeah. Amused, and confused. What is even happening?” you giggled, amazed that even Artem would do something of such a childish nature. Perhaps everyone would act a little different if a bratty person like Marius was involved.

“Well, I can tell you what’s happening. They are tickling him. What do you say, shall we help out?” Vyn asked you, leaning close as if the two of you were having an intimate and personal moment in the middle of the tickle fest. 

“Should we?” you asked, smirking. Vyn shrugged.

“I think we should.” And so you two rolled your chairs towards where Marius was laughing for his dear life.

“I refuhuhuse to plahahay your stuhuhupid gahahames!” he laughed, and he shrieked even louder when you joined in, clawing at his tummy while Artem continued to tickle his ribs and sides, and Luke was playfully wriggling his fingers under his arms, tickling his armpits.

“You’ll have to, Marius. Continue playing, I will be the one to answer your questions,” Vyn said, sitting right before him with his hands on his knees. He squeezed, and Marius let out a loud gasp.

“AHAHah!” His eyes widened, and you could see the realization on his face. He was stuck. He struggled with his bound arms, but even if he were to shake the tie off, you were certain these guys would not let him go easily. Heh. Neither would you. This was actually fun. 

“Ahaham I a rahahabit?!” Marius finally laughed, and you couldn’t help but giggle along. He was both cute and hilarious right now, and you continued to dance your fingers all over his belly. Vyn snickered and shook his head.

“No, you are not.”

“S-sehehehe, squirrel! A squirrehehel!”

“No,” Artem said firmly.

“A rahhaahat?!” Marius roared. 

Luke giggled. “Close, but no!” 

“AHAHAH! A MOUSEehehee! A stuhuhupid mouse!” 

Vyn smiled. “Correct.” To help ‘celebrate’, Luke switched to tickling Marius’ neck with scribbly finges as he taunted, “Bingo, finally you guessed something right! You are a mouse!” and meanwhile Artem continued to squeeze and pinch at different spots on Marius’ torso, from his upper sides to lower sides, his hips and back up towards his ribs, causing him to bounce hysterically.

“Thehehen stahahhap!” he laughed. 

“You are not there yet, Marius. You are a mouse, continue guessing.” 

“WHahahaht!” 

“Like I said, ask about his career!” Luke said, going back to tickling Marius’ underarms. Marius was giggling and snorting adorably, the grin on his face bigger than ever and a huge blush spreading on his cheeks.

“GAahahah-- a cohohop!?” he asked. Vyn shook his head.

“Can you name any mouse cop? You’ll have to do better than that, Marius,” he said, and he spidered his fingers all over Marius knees and thighs, making the poor ticklish heir bark out some more hysterical cackles.

“GAAGAHha! Not thehehere!” he roared. You were still tickling Marius’ tummy, gently and not too harshly, but you couldn’t help but move up his shirt a little and scribbled circles around on his stomach, fluttering all over the soft bare skin. Marius seemed to get even more flustered at this, and he shook his head. The card threatened to fall off, but Artem slapped it firmly back on Marius’ head, making the guy yelp out loud.

“HAHAHA! Artehehem you ahahaass-ahaha!” 

“Marius, remember the questions I asked when I was Harry Potter,” you tried to help him fondly even though you couldn’t stop your fingers from tickling Marius’ sensitive tummy without mercy. 

“HEYAhah!” Marius squealed and shook his head again, but this time the card was glued firmly to his forehead, and he continued his hysterical laughing fit.

“Hahahha! Ahaham I on T-Teehehee-TV?!” Marius laughed, indeed succeeding to copy your questions from earlier.

“Correct.” 

“OHOhoh! Ahaham I Jeheherry?!” Marius really appeared like he thought he finally guessed correct, but Vyn’s answer was a teasy “No~” and he punished the wrong guess with fierce squeezes right above Marius’ knees, making him howl for his ticklish life.

“AHhahahah! Nohhoho thihis ihiihisn’t fahahahair!” he laughed. You smiled, wonderstruck by how attractive the young heir looked laughing his head off like this.

“It’s a little fair, Marius. Continue guessing, you’re so close,” you encouraged.

“Come on man, can’t you really think of any other famous mouse on TV?” Luke asked - his tickles were the most energetic, switching from rapid pokes and finger wiggles and switching spots even when it would cause his hands to bump against yours or Artem's.

“PIHIHIKACHU!” Marius roared. Luke frowned.

“That’s a mouse?” he asked, to which you nodded.

“Actually it is. But wrong guess, Marius!” 

By now Marius was really turning beet red as he continued to laugh and struggle. Artem had been quiet for a while, tickling Marius with concentration and focus of a typical lawyer, and he smirked as he drilled his fingers between Marius’ ribs.

“I think it is a talent in itself that you give so many wrong guesses, Von Hagen,” he said, triggering Marius but all the graduate student could do was laugh and giggle more as he was attacked from all sides. You only noticed now that his arms were already free again after so much struggling, but both Artem and Luke were holding an arm each, and Marius could do very little with the strength he had left. 

Using their free hands, both men continued to tickle him, making him giggle and squeal even when he was nearly out of breath.

“Guess it right, or give up,” Artem said. Vyn made a face at that.

“Mr. Wing is right,” he said teasingly. “If you would like, you can give up. It means you lose the game.” 

Marius made a face that expressed his surprise and confusion that giving up was still a possibility. But then he shouted “Nahaha-neheheever!” while continuing to squirm in between them.

“Then have it your way~!” Luke said, getting up from where he was sitting so he could tickle his armpits more comfortably. 

“Heeehehehehe! Nahahaha!” You were getting the impression that stubborn Marius was going to laugh himself to death here if he couldn’t still guess the character that wasn’t even so hard. 

Maybe you were enjoying yourself a little too much by bullying your ticklish partner like this, and not just for evil reasons. But when you looked at Artem, Luke and Vyn, you recognized expressions that matched your mood as well. They all looked fond to have the usually arrogant heir laughing like this and refusing to give in.

“Ahahaahahlright I gihihive! Guhuhhuys, enahahaa-enough! I gihiive uuhup!” he finally wheezed. Surprised he still didn’t guess it, you were the first to stop tickling his stomach, and you sat back. Luke also stopped tickling, so did Artem, and finally Vyn stopped the squeezing and digging movements his hands were making on Marius’ legs.  

Leaning forward and bending his head, Marius panted and wheezed, catching his breath tiredly. And as he did, the card finally let go of his sweaty forehead and twirled down onto his lap. It fell with the text upwards, and you could see the realization on Marius’ face as he read it:

Mickey Mouse.

“N-no way,” he panted.

“Not so hard, huh? Can’t believe you didn’t think of the most famous mouse in the world,” Luke said smugly, patting Marius’ shoulder.

“Like I said, you can’t be good at everything,” Artem said, patting his other shoulder. 

“Unbelievable... Mi-Mickey Mouseー” Marius panted, and he raised his head suddenly and glared at everyone.

“You wrote my card, didn’t you-- R-Rosa?” he panted, smirking at you despite his exhausted state. You blinked your eyes.

“King,” you said, using his codename like he kept using yours, and you smiled nervously. 

“She did,” Vyn said, standing behind you with both hands on your shoulders.

“Anything you want to tell her, Mr. Mouse?” he asked. You giggled at the new nickname for Marius, but noticed this certain teasy remark wasn’t necessarily directed at Marius. Gulp. You looked up at Vyn. Why was this situation suddenly getting suspicious? 

“It was also not our idea to play this game. You can’t blame us,” Luke suddenly said. You gasped, turning your head towards him. Wha--?! Yes, it was your idea, so...? You finally looked at Artem, your eyes begging for his help, but you blushed to see the smirk on his face.

“Clever. You perhaps knew that such classic pop culture is Marius’ weakness? Are you the mastermind behind all this?” he said. You started to stutter, blushing like crazy. They were placing the blame for their stupid quarrels and the tickle incident ー which you joined but that wasn’t the point ー on you! 

“N-no of course nohot! Marius I thought it wahahasn’t difficult, ahaahah M-Mariuhuuus!” you whined when Marius lunged at you and started to avenge whatever was left of his dignity by tickling you, the one most responsible for his predicament just now.

“Guys, I might just forgive you for what you did to me if you help me out right now,” Marius purred, smirking at the others. It was no surprise after what all of them said, but still to suddenly have the tables turned with you ending up in Marius’ position of the one tickled by all of the NXX squad, well, that was something you could never ever be properly prepared for.

“HAHahaha- guuuuys!” you howled, but these four had the time of their lives wrecking you, and you were surprised at their well-played teamwork. 

Well all in all, you had achieved your goal though: team bonding, check. Having fun, check. Having a laugh? Thanks to Mr. Mouse, double check! 

[alliseearekingsandthieves]

Hi!

First of all, I'm in love with your work, I think your time travel fic might be one of the best ones I read on mha so far!

It's so original, the way Shigaraki ponders each decision like he's in a videogame is so charming, and I love your Kurogiri!

Also your Hana survived AU is such an original idea.

Speaking of, my real question for you.

What are your thoughts on canon Shigaraki?

The fact that in your AU he still had one family member he cared about around during his formative years means that he now has that tad more of emotional intelligence (even though his stats are still shit) to be honest with himself about his feelings for his League. Therefore, he thinks about them with genuine care, reflectiong on ways he can take care of them better this time around, proving that he noticed stuff about them even in the first run. Not that he's all healthy, he's possessive in a way, and I'm surprised the fact that surrounding himself with people he cares about while working against AfO might be dangerous for them hasn't yet crossed his mind, but still.

He cares, he knows he cares, he's working to show he cares.

Canon Shigaraki on the other hand, the one who spent fifteen years of his life with zero human contact aside from his sensei and a nomu, do you think he realizes he needs the league on a different level than their skill sets? Does he care more about total destruction or about giving them the freedom they desire? Does he listen to their reasons to be villains, is there some anger for them too in that bundle of hate inside of him? Does he miss Kurogiri, does he think of him as a parental figure? Does he know that they care for him?

I guess you could summarize the question like this: does Shigaraki canonically love his League, and do they really care for each other, or is it just us wanting to see this group brought together by desperation and isolation happy?

Fuck, I'm sorry, this is a super complicated question.

Thank you for reading, sorry for the headache, have a good day ✨

Hi! Wow! Thank you so much for enjoying my work! I'm glad it's something which appeals to you and that it's entertaining! Thank you so much for reading and for your kindness!

Regarding your question: no worries! I get it! This question is complicated but I love to ramble!

My thoughts on canon Shigaraki are complicated and they are colored by the fact that I haven't read the comic properly in several years! There's a ton of people out there who do some really clever analysis work on him and how he is; I am very much not one of them. The following information is probably wrong and when I reread the comic and find I'm wholly incorrect about a ton of things in this answer, I'll shrivel up inside. This is gonna be long and rambly, so buckle up!

Anygay, I don't really love canon Shigaraki all that much. I don't think enough was really done to justify why the League is so devoted to him, so a lot of my work is meant to weave into the places where the reader wasn't allowed and explain where he might've had softer points with them. Like a lot of other LoV fans, I am fixated on the part where he tells his League they should be able to get what they want. And I don't think he really truly wants total devastation as much as he wants the world to just stop hurting.

His name literally means "mourning" and All for One made him wear his family's hands so that he would never stop feeling terrible. He always seems to me like destructive grief. When you're passively suicidal, you want to stop existing for a while. He wants everything else to stop existing, and I see that as grief more than anything else.

He's got all the mental trauma and very little of the reason for said trauma up until he fights Re-Destro and suddenly it comes flooding back. He cannot physically handle his emotions and violently rejects them over and over again through vomiting. His body seems constantly like it's trying to reject Overhaul's quirk and I would make guesses that he feels ill and unsettled all the time, but it keeps turning into bad temper because he's got no other outlet. I could make some metaphors here about how discomfort in your body leads to you harming others and/or harming yourself when you lash out, but I can't think of something with a 1:1 ratio right now, sorry.

He's constantly destroying things, but it's not just other people's things; he destroys his own things in fits of rage and then has to deal with the fact that he did. He's obviously very mentally unwell and has no tools for fixing that, and he dies thinking of his League and how he wanted to be their hero, which does suggest that he loved them a lot.

I've mentioned before that I read the Smash! comics (not recommended and I did not like the humor most times), and the Shigaraki in those is a little funnier and more openly awkward and weird. He wants to make friends with the League and wants them to see him as cool, and you can watch him kind of struggle through that in some of the little League comic strips. My favorite is the one where he wants to show the League how great he is by playing Dark Souls, like, buddy...

But him wanting to impress the League and keep them around him is canon. He has to try and convince them to stay with him and he takes vengeance for Magne. (I can't say for sure that it's really on her account though as the narrative seems to drop her existence afterward and she doesn't show up in his line-up for the League of Villains when he says he wants to be their hero, so it's like :/) He lets Compress attack Overhaul first in order to avenge his arm, he defends Himiko, he and Spinner are Very Close. I think he and Dabi do not vibe in the goddamn slightest, which is probably due to Dabi's loose cannon tendencies and Shigaraki's own temper.

I don't know if he loves Kurogiri in canon! I think he takes them for granted, but that could be chalked up to the fact that he's twenty, twenty-one, and at that age, you take your parents for granted. Or that could be my "Kurogiri is his dad!!!" lunacy talking and it could be that Kurogiri is just an adult who he can trust and he's acting out to see where the boundaries are. Because canonically, as much as Kurogiri defends him, All for One is still the "favored parent."

TL;DR I think canon Shigaraki loves his League the best he can, but I think he knows it wasn't enough in the end. I think we are reading more into it than we're shown because we want them to be happy, and they were at points! They were happy! It just wasn't enough to save them.

(But that's what fanfic's for, right?)

Haha, thanks for the ask and for enjoying my work! I loved trying to answer this question and I hope it makes at least a little sense. Have a marvelous rest of your day and stay safe!

[mywritingonlyfans]

hello uuu💓!! I love your writing so much and I hope you’re doing wonderful. I don’t know if you saw but Alex’s gf got a nipple piercing, and I would just die if you could (most importantly if you want and are in the mood for, if not totally understandable) tell us your thoughts or write something along the lines of Alex seeing your nipple piercings/reaction, how would he treat them. I just can’t get that idea out of my head

Omg omg omg omg 😭 I literally just woke up and read your message and went on Instagram to see this jesus. (HELLO YOU! babe)

I'm sharing thoughts, but I'll try to use that in a narrative soon because this is so good pls 😭 tthxx for sending this!

Alright, imagine telling him this before doing it. You're sitting on the edge of the bed, and he's between your knees. Your hands are on his jaw, holding him close to you as if he would consider looking at anything else but your worried eyes. Your fingers are sliding down his neck (and soft baby curls) as you contemplate how getting a nipple piercing could boost your self-esteem, and it could be an idea, but you want to hear his opinion first (even though you'd do it the same way, and you know he wouldn't mind). And he's looking at you cautiously, hanging onto every word before giving you lovely smile, seemingly caught off guard but not failing to shower you in repetitions of how hot you are and how you'll get even hotter as he tightens his grip on you and kisses you. (Like, please, the way he would be fixated on sucking and nibbling them, and how it would intensify afterward – maybe you'd even feel more confident after and pushing his mouth to them at any opportunity.)

And then he goes with you, your eyes watery with the prospect that it might hurt. He holds your hand, running his thumb over your skin to soften it and try to trick your synapses. Or better, he stands by the door, looking at you without your baby tee shirt. You're smiling and confident about it as he holds his jacket between his hands and watches you because you said you wanted him there. He feels happy to see you happy and a bit numb as you get up from the chair, push your hair back, and ask him to look at how it turned out. (He's already drooling over you.) Your face holds a smile between your teeth, knowing he won't hold back when it comes to complimenting you once you're alone. And yes, he would listen attentively about how to take care of and clean the area to do it for you whenever you'd like.

He would be so careful during the healing period, so you would always be on top. Unable to lavish the intensity with which you took care of him on your breasts, he would certainly focus more on other areas, like thighs and waist (squeezing, biting, marking and everything). And of course, seeing that you enjoy that, it would become a recurring thing. And you getting there, feeling exhausted and a bit frustrated, only for him to hold you and kiss away your tears while you're whimpering that you needed this to pass quickly because you missed having his mouth around them. He would clearly chuckle but feel the same way, even knowing that the wait would be worth it, and then he would nibble and kiss the skin around to try to soothe you a bit. And he would say that you would have to wait a bit longer with some laughter. Oh, he would clean the area for you, you know? Wipe away the sweat and put you in one of his tank tops that he usually wears under his button-down white shirts, then give a kiss to each one over the fabric and hear you moan softly because it was still a bit sensitive.

Around people who were close to you both, like the boys and girlfriends, I think he would kiss them over the thin fabric of your blouses. Maybe you haven't seen each other since the morning, and he's seeing you for the "first" time after having spent energy from you first thing in the morning and then he pulls you by the waist, wrapping his wide hands around you, lowers his head and kisses them with a good (lots of) pressure and he can see your body growing soft or just tense because your cheeks getting too hot at it. (If he's having a good day, he'll even bite to hear your muffled sighs in your hands). Oh, he would certainly stare at them from time to time whenever you were braless and they were showing thru your t-shirt. It would be like magnetism, even if he tried or disguised it, you would notice. Or touching and squeezing them when no one is watching just to have you snuggle up to him and say, "not here" even though the voice didn't hide that you liked it.

And okay, if it's a surprise and he's going to see it for the first time after you've already done it, I think it would be a case of you not being able to wait to show him. You would certainly have to take him to a calmer place or maybe in the car and tell him that you want to show him something and he feels a little red in his cheeks and ears when he sees you opening the buttons on your shirt, his bright eyes on you, meeting the metal slightly illuminated by the light light of the car. Your pretty nipples stiff from the cold wind and him licking his lips, sighing contentedly and unrestrainedly as he didn't utter words even after you let out a smile and whispered, "did you like it, Al?" with a calm tone and without perspective on the thoughts he was having at the moment. Let's say this happened while he was on tour, so at this event your nipples had been pierced for a few weeks and safe. So soon, Alex's reaction would be to run his thumb over your happy skin, making you let out the same sighs he had let out minutes ago and after rubbing them lightly and seeing that everything was ok, he would hold your waist and kiss them cautiously until he decides he would like to bite them and then leave the skin below your breast chewed and marked. (and yes, this is in the car, minutes before you need to go out and meet people. The windows are cloudy and you hold the back of his head in light pulls and moans, not being able to verbalize well a tiny, "I'm glad you liked it, my love.")

[kumoriyami-xiuzhen]

Hakuoki Shinkai Hana no Shou Animate Bonus Drama CD "Unchanging Feelings" Eng translation

Anyone happen to know where content that is probably under the title of 「土方さんの習字について」 comes from? Found it saved in my Nimble file in both JP and CN... and I have no where idea it came from. It's short exchange between Hijikata, Souji and Kondou.

Anyway, this translation is of the Hana no Shou Animate Bonus CD 「変わらぬ想い」. I actually had this on my to-do list for a while since I'm pretty sure I don't have any Iba content that's longer than two sentences (well, I'm at least pretty sure about that?)... but I just never got around to it (or a number of other drama CDs that I want to have translated...😅). Suppose it helps that I got discouraged (again) from translating the Shimabara Disturbance drama's first track as I have to go and review some videos to fill in the gaps where text is missing for that... and doing this felt like less work despite how it felt like a pain to do.

enjoy~? Almost didn't make it because I had a hard time with one sentence...

Hakuoki Shinkai Animate Bonus Drama CD "Unchanging Feelings"

Translation by KumoriYami

Iba: As expected, the Shinsengumi's training is strict, but I also feel that the time spent has been very meaningful. And practising with the officers has been exhausting.

Toudou: Oh, isn't that Hachiro? Have you come to train?

Iba: Heisuke-kun! Yes, I've just started to rest now.

Heisuke: Speaking of which, you really do seem to like our training.

Iba: I'll take that as a compliment.

Heisuke: How was the training?

Iba：There are many people who use different techniques and styles, and it's a great learning experience. I accidently got carried away and sparred with everyone many times. If I don't properly rest, I feel that my body won't be able to keep up.

Toudou: That's because Hachiro is very popular. There are many members who want to train with you.

Iba: Truly, I'm very happy.

Toudou: That's right! Who did you train with today?

IbaL Shinpat-san was my first opponent. He's as strong as ever.

Toudou: Shinpat-san is very strong.

Iba: If we were in a tsubazeriai*[references at end], I would be the one to lose, so I tried to prevent that from happening as much as possible.

tsubazeriai can be used to describe a situation where two swordsmen are very close to each other where they both try to push forward. To simplify this would be to say that they are in "neck-and-neck" competition."

Toudou: But Shinpat-san would definitely charge ahead without any mercy, right?

Iba: Precisely.

Toudou：If that happens, it feels you'd get supressed right away. It truly feels good to know that he's companion.

Iba: That's true. Ah, after that, I sparred with Saito-kun.

Toudou: Oh, how was that?

Iba: Saito-kun's iai has great value. That being said, there's no time to think about that during training.

Toudou: Hajime-kun and Shinpat-san aren't the same when it comes to strength.

Iba: My own training is insufficient.

Toudou: Hehe, then I can't lose!

Iba: Heisuke-kun still hasn't changed at all.

Toudou: You say that, but isn't it the same for Hachiro?

Iba: Me?

Toudou: That's right, it's just like that time, as long as Hachiro showed up at Shiekan, you and everyone would engage in matches.

Iba: Yes, I previously used to train a lot.

Toudou: As long as someone challenges you, you'd accept accept it.

Iba: Isn't that the same for Heisuke-kun? Didn't you Shinpat-san used to have some pretty wild fights before?

Toudou: Ah, I miss those. They were the sort that didn't end unless someone collapsed.

Iba: Of course, the two of you were both over your heads/stubborn.

Toudou: Even though I really got beaten until I collapsed, we were scolded by Hijikata-san.

Iba: Even if we try to console him, he wouldn't listen at all.

Toudou: It's because it feels like Shinpat-san's physical strength is endless, that his attacks are relentless.

Iba: I know how you feel. It's because we know the other party is strong that we fixate on not losing.

Touodu: We surprisingly haven’t changed at all.

Iba: Indeed, even back then, Toshi-san was obsessed with victory and defeat.

Toudou: Why are you bringing up Hijikata-san now?

Iba: When mentioning things that haven't changed, the first person that comes to mind is Toshi-san.

Toudou: Hachiro, you've really admired Hijikata-san for a long time.

Iba: Yes, Ithis hasn't changed since then.

Toudou: Hey, what exactly is so good about HIjikata-san? Not that I hate him or anything.

Iba: Toshi-san is a very good person. Not only is his swordsmanship excellent, but I was attracted to his character.

Toudou: Like how/For instance/example?

Iba: For example, he's very strict but is still treats us with love.

Toudou: Love!?

Iba: On one hand, he has resolute and unwavering beliefs, but he simultaneously has a weakness to cute things.

Toudou: Was there such a thing?

Iba: Even his ability to not drink is quite charming.

Toudou: Haha, I get that!

Hijikata: Tch, you guys, what exactly is it that you know.

Heisuke: Hijikata-san?!

Iba: Tosh-san! We were just talking about Toshi-san.

Hijikata: Yeah, I figured… I could hear uncomfortable subjects from afar.

Iba: Toshi-san, you you like to talk about this too?

Hijikata: What do you want me to say?

Iba: Of course, about how outstanding Toshi-san is.

Hijikata: Spare me. Furthermore, it'd be too embarrassing if the other members heard this so please stop.

Iba: Is that so. That's a pity. Since Toshi-san has said that, I won't say anymore.

Hijikata: Geez, you. Also, Heisuke! I'm not bad at drinking!

Toudou: Ah, I get it. (Hijikata walks away). That scared me. Hijikata-san has seriously good ears, I don't know he always appears when he's mentioned.

Iba: That aspect hasn't changed at all.

Toudou: That's right. Who knows when he started listening/when his ears became so sensitive.

Iba: Hey, Heisuke-kun.

Toudou: What is it?

Iba: You, Heisuke-kun, who has since been learning from everyone else and going in the same way since the beginning/Everyone, including Heisuke-kun, who used to be shrouded in obscurity is now in Kyoto as the prestigious Shinsengumi, and I became an Okuzume. Although we're not in the same position, we all serve the shogunate. Thinking of about it all this way, always feels incredible.

Toudou: Ah, that's right.

Iba: What's wrong?

Toudou: I mean this hypothetically, but what if you questions about where you fit in/belonged?

Iba: Eh? Do you have questions about where you belong?

Toudou: Yeah.

Iba: If I had any questions, then I would be not be questioning where it was that I belonged, but myself.

Toudou: What do you mean?

Iba: I have my own beliefs about the work I do as an Okuzume. Because of that, I often get anxious about whether or not what I do is useful.

Toudou: I see. So Hachiro also feels the same way.

Iba: Yes, I have thinking of this especially lately.

Toudou: I've been thinking about some things lately. the people who've been joining the Shinsengumi, and how it's changed. In the future, when these changes become bigger and bigger, will I be able to think as I do now?

Iba: Heisuke-kun...

Toudou: Sorry, I said something weird.

Iba: Ah, no, not really.

Toudou: Forget about what I just said. It's almost time for me to go on patrol. I'll be going!

Iba: Oh, Heisuke-kun! Wait a moment!

(Heisuke runs off)

What happened to him? Ah? Toshi-san! How long have you been there?

Hijikata: Ah, you noticed me. I was just passing by. By the way, is that guy Heisuke, okay?

Iba: Ah, Toshi-san is also worried about Heisuke-kun? That's why just now.

Hijikata: We've known each other for a long time so it's hard to not notice any changes to him. Although I've been trying to keep more of an eye on him lately, that guy's been worrying about something by himself all the time.

Iba: So that's how it is. Although Heisuke-kun seems to be thinking about a number of things, I think it's best to leave him to think to himself.

Hijikata: I see.

Iba: It's fine. If Heisuke-kun really has a problem, he has a trustworthy comrade beside him.

Hijikata: Trustworthy is it, well, maybe so.

Iba: Speaking of which, Toshi-san, do you had questions about where you belong after that?

Hijikata: What, why are you suddenly asking about this sort of thing.

Iba: It just came to mind. Of course, just hypothetically.

Hijikata: The moment I suspect that the Shinsengumi is over, I think it's my responsibility to prevent that situation from happening.

Iba: : Even so, if one day the Shinsengumi really changes, and if that sort of thing really happens, will Toshi-san be able to stay the same as before?

Hijikata: As long as Kondou-san and I are alive, the Shinsengumi will not change. But if change happens, then I won't change, regardless of how large the changes are around me, I just need to stick to my beliefs.

Iba: As expected, Toshi-san is indeed the same Toshi-san from before.

Hijikata： What are you saying.

Iba: It's so great that I met Toshi-san, I've been attracted to you for a long time.

Hijikata: Hey, that's why I asked you to stop saying such embarrassing things for others to hear.

Iba: Really? Is it something embarrassing?

Hijikata: You haven't changed at all. How is it that I can be so interesting to you?

Iba: Of course that's because I respect Toshi-san.

Hijikata: As you wish, but, just don't mention this sort of thing in front of the other soldiers.

Iba: Ah, I understand.

Hijikata: Then I'll be going first.

Iba: Ah, please Toshi-san, I'll be going back to training, so please accompany me!

(footsteps)

(The current situtation is very turbulent,but even if everything changes, the ideals I have in my heart will remain unchanged. The guidance he gave just now, has clearly been engraved into my thoughts. I will just believe in what you said, Toshi-san.)

Hijikata Toshizou: Miki Shin'ichiro

Toudou Heisuke: Yoshino Hiroyuki

Iba Hachirou: Miyano Mamoru

---end---

image was taken from suruga-ya

*references:

https://www.japanesewiki.com/culture/Tsubazeriai.html

https://www.tanoshiijapanese.com/dictionary/entry_details.cfm?entry_id=41759&element_id=204340

https://samurai-shodown.fandom.com/wiki/Locking_Swords

note to self: maybe use an audio translator to check over that line when Iba first mentions the Okuzume... not sure about that part since the translations of the differing tls I use are very different in that part.

[kai-anderson-whore]

New colleague (part 2 smut) (jeff pfister x fem reader)

Warnings: smut, Jeff being a sub at the start, oral (jeff receiving) jeff having a boner imfront of reader for no reason, mutt walking in on reader and mutt after they did the deed, I think that's it let me know if I had missed anything

A/n I don't really like this one as much as my other smuts not because it's jeff I just think it lacks

Taglist: @violetweekly

•¤❅¤•.•°˚˚°•..•°˚˚°•.•¤❅¤•.•¤❅¤•.•°˚˚°•. .•°˚˚°

As the weeks turned into months you created such an amazing relationship with the boys, more so with Jeff first it was talking more often than mutt, then to having your own inside jokes, then it dawned on you that you actually have a crush on Jeff.

To be honest usually guys like Jeff wasn't your type especially with the drugs but he was so sweet to you treated you like you hadn't been treated before how could you not start to fall for him.

You stood in the lab sketching some ideas for your next project that was actually for someone other than mutt and Jeff's dirty minds, you were stuck trying to figure out what to sketch for your client ripping the paper from your sketch book with a groan.

"You alright y/n" you heard Jeff say behind you, you turned from where you stood to face him, "no I can't get this sketch right for my client it's some businessman who wants a cool robot for his kid" you sighed rubbing your temples in frustration.

"Want me to help I mean I was a boy once so might be good to have my help?" Jeff offered you gave it a thought and agreed to have Jeff help you, "you still are a big child Jeff don't kid yourself" you joked Jeff pretend to be shocked at your statement making you laugh.

"That hurt my feelings but I'll still help you" Jeff chuckled now stood right beside you brainstorming some ideas you could do, as you sketched on the paper finally your project was coming to life with the help of Jeff you couldn't thank him enough so you asked him to be your partner on your project in which he accepted.

As the weeks went further on you and jeff were almost halfway through finishing your project, you were doing the wiring for the robot trying to be careful not to electrocute yourself, Jeff was on his lunch break leaving you to do the hard work you didn't mind though you were good at wiring things since your father was an electrician.

By the time you had finished Jeff came back from his break with some more food, "I brought you something since you didn't want to go on your break to finish this" he said handing you the Styrofoam tub you gave him a small appreciation smile taking the tub from his hands, "Thank you Jeff you didn't need to" your voice almost at a whisper he bought your favourite food to be honest you were completely surprised that he listened to you.

"Is that right your order?" Jeff asked knowing that it was infact your correct order, "yes Jeff thank you" you said with a small smile going back to wire the robot, "why don't you just leave that till later y/n" Jeff suggested you did need a break from the project for 5 minutes but you were almost finished with the wiring "it's okay Jeff I'm almost done with this last part" you replied.

"Y/n you've been at that all day just take a break for the rest of the day" Jeff chuckled he thought you looked so cute all focused on your project the way your eyes fixated on every detail, the way your tongue would stick out slightly when your in deep concentration Jeff didn't realise it made him have a boner.

You were too invested in wiring the last of the robot you didn't notice Jeff squirming at the other side of the table, "I'm almost finished Jeff it's fine honestly i promise when I'm finished I'll take a break" you said softly finishing off the work.

After a few minutes you were finally done with a heavy sigh you turned to Jeff now noticing his red face and constant shifting around, "what gotten into you" you asked taking a sip of you now cold coffee grimacing at the coldness of it, "nothing" Jeff tried to play it off but it was no use, "Jeff I'm not dumb something is up your constantly shifting around if you got ants in your pants" you laughed.

Now realising what was the matter your jaw dropped with a small chuckle, "Jeff have you got a boner" you laughed nervously, Jeff was even redder if that was even possible "no I've not" he protested making you laugh harder at his denial, "your such a virgin Jeff it's cute" you smiled blushing at the fact he had a boner infront of you but at the same time it did something to you knowing that you had such an effect on the blonde.

"I'm sorry" Jeff mumbled trying to hide his face with embarrassment he felt silly having a boner infront of you he couldn't control himself he wanted you so bad, and you now knowing this wanted to take the situation into your own hands.

You went over to him all full of the confidence you got placing your hands him his thighs Jeff's breath hitched at your action making your hands go higher till they hovered above where he needed you most, "want me to take care of that for you?" You asked innocently watching Jeff swallowing a lump in his throat nodding.

"Use your words Jeff" you chuckled batting your eyelashes at him, "yes" Jeff breathed out as your hands began to remove his pants freeing his throbbing erection, you were surprised at the size he was bigger than you expected, you held his cock in your hand kitten licking the tip sending Jeff in a frenzy his head flew back his eyes scrunched shut.

Now taking him in your mouth bobbing your head along his length hollowing your cheeks on him taking him further in your mouth, "fuck" Jeff hissed his hips bucking up making you gag a little, as you tried to breath through your nose, you continued these actions till Jeff pulled you off him.

You looked up at the Bob cut blonde in confusion as he collected himself, "I need to be inside you" was all he said you let a smirk play on your now plump lips and pulled your underwear down under your skirt discarding the thin fabric somewhere in the lab.

You then straddled Jeff on the chair he sat on lining him up with your throbbing heat, sinking down on him both of you moaned in union your hands gripped his shoulders adjusting to his size since it has been a good while since you've been intimate with anyone since your ex, "you feel so good" Jeff groaned once you started in a slow pace at first your moans started getting louder as you speed up the pace Jeff's hands on your hips guiding you through the pace you rode him.

Jeff was intoxicated by you the way your mouth hung open the way your neck was on full display Jeff couldn't help but attach his lips on the skin exposed to him finding your sweet spot making you moan your hands in his hair tugging the blonde locks.

You felt that knot in your stomach beginning to form you sped up your movements bringing you closer to your sweet release, "fuck I'm close" you moaned Jeff pulled away from your neck looking into your eyes, "me too" he panted thrusting up into you with each time you bounced on Jeff's lap your clit brushed against the fabric of his zipper bringing you closer.

You couldn't hold it any longer finally letting go over Jeff's cock with a loud moan of his name Jeff wasn't that far behind letting ropes of his seed fill you up with a moan as well, you stayed still for a moment collecting yourself together letting out a small chuckle, "what?" Jeff asked confused, "nothing just didn't actually expect we'd do that" you shook your head looking at him, "is that a bad thing or?" He asked unsure of what you had meant he knew that you were way out of his league but he couldn't help but have those feelings for you.

"No not a bad thing definitely a good thing just didn't expect it to happen like this you know but I'm glad it did" you assured with a soft smile that made Jeff's heart melt at the sight, Jeff then decided to crash his lips on to yours for the first time and he was instantly hooked on the feeling of your lips on his not wanting to part from the plush softness of them.

"OH MY GOD YOU TWO FUCKED ABOUT TIME" the loud voice of mutt interrupted your intimate moment with Jeff, making you both snap your heads his way to find him wide eyed eyeing the way you were seated, "mutt get out so we can get clothes on you prev" you laughed in embarrassment mutt instantly ran out the lab giving you and jeff privacy to fix your clothes.

"Look y/n I like you like a lot" Jeff chuckled nervously after fixing his pants back on as you put your underwear back on, "I like you too Jeff" you smiled pecking his lips one more time, "so what so we do now?" Jeff asked scratching the back of his neck, "well we get back to work right now but as this" you said pointing to yourself and Jeff before continuing, "we take it slow one step at a time see where it takes us" you offered.

Jeff nodded with a glad smile on his lips, "I like the sound of that I'll go tell mutt he can come back now" he chuckled away to get his best friend who wouldn't stop making jokes about what he had walked into leaving you amd Jeff red as a tomato.

[decaf-mother]

"Like I'm The One"

-

MDNI

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Carlos Oliveira x GN!Reader

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Warnings: Pure Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Slight Hurt + Comfort

-

Your fingers tapped anxiously against the kitchen table, you've been best friends with Carlos since you were children. You confided everything into each other.

Being without communication with him for so long made your heart sink, mind plagued with worries especially since there's been a few close calls with his line of work before.

Losing your best friend is not on the list of things you think you could handle going through, yet it's a very real possibility that sits right around the corner always. A suffocating weight that you learned to cope with via distractions.

-

"I'll be back before you know it."

"You better be."

That goofy grin spread wide on his face like usual, he waved to you before heading off. Your fingers clutching onto your mug tightly.

You better come back to me. I can't imagine a world without you- you big idiot.

-

His thick curly hair soaked from the rain as well as the rest of him, effectively looking like a giant drenched sheep dog dripping all over your floor.

"Carlos-"

"Told you I'd be back."

You aren't sure when you started crying, not entirely aware of your own body's reactions at this point, all the stress from everything surfacing.

You missed him.

You needed him.

Work had been horribly stressful on top of everything, coffee stains on your shirt from a pissy customer, trembles wracking your body.

You only came back out of your head when you felt two strong arms wrapped around you, tugging you into a tight embrace. He smells of rain and musk, getting you damp in the process not that you cared.

"Hey, hey... Look at me. I'm right here. It's going to be okay..."

His words were soft as he spoke, a reassuring tone to try and ease your aching heart, gripping you close like a precious vase that could be shattered in one slip.

He pulled back and looked down at you, letting your gaze fall on his worried expression. However you also took note of just how messy his hair is at the moment, a soft chuckle emerging which in return made him smile.

"There's my sunshine."

He remarked as he took in your happier features, your smile could always light up his day and he'd do anything to see it- even if it was because you were giggling at how disheveled he looked.

"Let me go get you a towel."

"Good idea."

••

You sat beside him on the couch watching TV, settling into the comfortable feeling of it like usual. Those deep brown eyes of his were fixated on the show... You however kept finding yourself glancing at him instead.

Were you harboring feelings for him that were more than just friendship? Of course not... Don't be ridiculous...

He finally shifted and looked right back at you, catching you during your deep-in-thought staring.

"Something on your mind?"

You were like a deer caught in headlights- how do you possibly explain this???

Though the way he looked at you wasn't how friends looked at each other either, come to think of it he's always looked at you a bit differently- you just never fully noticed.

"I just..."

He moved in closer to you with a small smile playing on his lips.

"Just what?"

"Stop looking at me like that."

You scooted back away from his form slightly and glanced away, trying to force the butterflies in your stomach to cut it the fuck out.

"You were the one who was staring first."

He chuckled slightly and you couldn't help but huff at the comment, it almost felt like back when you two were young teens again. Attempting to navigate that desperately fuzzy feeling.

"Just- don't look at me like that."

"Why not?"

"Because..."

His hand finds its way to yours and encompasses it in his grip, his touch warm and comforting as always which only worsens the tide of feelings.

"Because?"

"Because it makes me feel like... Like I'm the one."

He moved in closer and placed his finger beneath your chin, tilting your face up to meet his gaze and allowing him to take in all that is you.

All the things he's loved about you for so long.

"What if you are the one?"

There's no hint of doubt in his expression or voice, making it clear it's always been you that he wants. Perhaps he's held back all this time out of fear of screwing up the friendship.

Maybe that's the chains that have held both of you back.

Soulmates or not you'll be damned if you miss this chance, leaning in and at last getting to taste him on your lips.

Tender and sweet like honey, eyes shut and at peace with the world. All you could feel was him and the steady drum of your heart, one of his hands settled on the back of your head while the other was on your mid-back.

Don't you dare ever leave me in a carlos-less world.

-

{Guys I'm so in love with him you have no idea- this is my first attempt at writing for him though. Lol}

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{More Content}

[benjaycaptain]

Wonders all around you

written for @descendantsgiftexchange for @fifthnormani . hope you had a lovely holiday, and sorry for the wait!

Jay stared at his rucksack, going over his mental checklist to see what he had missed.

He hadn't expected Gil to actually agree to a trip, but now that it was happening, Jay figured why not. Gil definitely wanted to experience the wonders of Auradon, and Jay could use a breather after a busy year.

"So," Mal drawled as she came up beside him, "all set for the honeymoon?"

Rolling his eyes, Jay said, "For the last time, it isn't a honeymoon."

"It's totally a honeymoon," she practically sing-songed, "you're doing exactly what Ben and me are doing. In fact, you're doing it for longer."

Because a king can't exactly be away for longer, Jay thought, knowing that they both knew that. "Except the whole marriage thing," he said instead, questioning why he was even entertaining the conversation yet again.

"Don't sweat the small stuff."

"Oh, so now marriage is small stuff?"

"You decided to take a gap year to travel the world with Gil, how is that not like a whirlwind marriage?"

Jay sighed. "Do I need to throw you out?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, am I distracting you from something important?"

"Nah, you're just being annoying, as usual."

She swatted his shoulder. "Rude, I am a delight."

Raising an eyebrow to hide his amusement, he said, "That's not the word I'd use."

Mal gasped, moving her hand to her chest in mock-shock. "How dare you, sir! Just for that I'm leaving." She made a show of huffing as she stomped toward the door.

"Oh no, what will I do now," Jay said, deadpan, focused once more on his rucksack.

"Just for that, I won't give you any romantic advice," she warned as she crossed the doorway, her hand on the doorknob, as if she was waiting for the perfect time to slam it shut.

Her threat pulled a laugh out from him, despite himself. "As if I'd ever ask you for that."

Mal opened her mouth but paused. She blinked. "You know what, that's fair," she said, but a grin formed as she began to close the door. "But I'll take that as admission that you need some. Bye, Jay, have fun!" The rush of her words were punctuated by the door clicking closed.

Jay stared at the door.

He then sighed.

Mal's really harping on this, he thought, wondering why she was so fixated on the idea. Though, in the grand scheme of things, he supposed it wouldn't hurt anything if he just let her continue thinking the trip had a deeper meaning than just an excuse to go exploring.

After all, he'd been in Auradon for some time now, but he hadn't actually seen anything. Why shouldn't he take the opportunity that Gil had presented?

Never mind that it had been his own idea.

Sighing again, Jay continued packing, trying not to let Mal's words get under his skin.

—

They hadn't been on their hike long, their pace leisurely if excited, when Gil stopped short, a gasp leaving him.

"The leaves are different colors!" Gil said, practically bouncing on the heels of his feet.

Jay blinked, and he looked around. "Yeah, the colors change with the season. We're in Fall now."

"Amazing," Gil said, voice soft as he stared out at the different trees. "Do they become, like, every color?"

Jay opened his mouth, but he paused, glancing from the different types of trees to the awe on Gil's face. "You know what, I don't know," he said, truthful and unashamed. He hadn't been outside in forests all that often, and he certainly hadn't been everywhere.

Maybe trees could be every color.

"I wanna see every color possible," Gil said, eyes gleaming as he continued staring, determination now dancing across his features, mixing with his excitement so much that he almost glowed.

"We'll keep our eyes open," Jay said even as his gaze stayed on Gil.

Even when he first arrived in Auradon, he hadn't been half as excited as Gil currently was.

When Gil turned to smile at him, Jay found himself smiling back.

—

They had decided to each keep a journal of their findings — the different colored leaves, types of animals, flowers, plants, rocks, anything and everything new and interesting — so Jay was writing about a funky type of mushroom when Gil grabbed his wrist.

Alarmed, Jay looked up, and his nerves braced for a threat until he took in the astonishment on Gil's face. Blinking, he followed Gil's gaze until he landed on a blue-gray and white bird perched on a tree's upper branch.

Brow creasing, Jay asked, "Gil?"

"Shh!" Gil squeezed Jay's wrist briefly. "I think—" He gasped as the bird spread its wings and took to the sky.

The both of them watched the bird fly for as long as they could before it disappeared completely in the foliage.

"That was an actual bird," Gil said at length, tone soft even as he squeezed Jay's wrist again, "and it was actually flying!"

A small laugh left Jay, unbidden. "Yeah, man. I think it was a hawk," he said, but the longer he watched Gil stare after the bird, the more he realized that the island had very little birds, let alone ones healthy enough to actually fly. "Maybe we'll see more. Like an owl or something."

"An owl?" Gil asked as he finally tore his eyes away from the canopy.

"Yeah, but they probably come out after dark."

"Dude, why are we sleeping after dark instead of exploring more!"

"Because we want to stay alive, dude," Jay reminded him.

Gil pouted. "Fine."

Amused, Jay said, "Maybe one night we can just chill outside our tents by the fire. See if we can see anything."

Instantly, Gil brightened. He pulled Jay close — and it was then that Jay realized that Gil had never released his wrist — and said, "Deal!"

Jay collided with Gil with a small grunt, the one arm hug a little awkward because Gil still held his wrist, but Jay simply let Gil manhandle him as he said, "Deal."

Gil hadn't released him right away, but when he did, he was smiling wide.

Despite the chill in the air, Jay felt warm.

—

"It's getting colder," Gil said one day after he had climbed up and down yet another tree.

"Yeah," Jay agreed absently, focusing on building a fire; the sun would be setting soon, and they hadn't properly set up camp yet.

"And it's usually even colder at night," Gil continued, playing with the bit of bark in his hands.

"Yup," Jay agreed again as he got up, satisfied with the fire enough that he decided to start on pitching up their tents.

"So why don't we just sleep together?"

Jay nearly tripped over his own two feet as he spread one of the footprints down on the ground. He stood straight, staring at Gil. "What?"

"I mean," Gil began, tilting his head to the side, "why use two tents when one is big enough for both of us?"

"Ah," Jay said lamely, and he glanced down at the tent he was currently setting up and then glanced at the other still packed away. They weren't huge tents, but one could definitely fit the both of them; though, it wouldn't be roomy. "I guess that's fine," he said when he realized Gil was still waiting on his answer.

"And we'll be warmer!" Gil said triumphantly.

"Seeing as we'll nearly be on top of each other, definitely," Jay said, amused, as he continued setting up.

"That's fine," Gil said pleasantly, sitting by the fire and watching Jay work. "I like to cuddle anyway."

Feeling himself grow warm, Jay did his best to focus on the task at hand. "Lucky me…" His cheeks grew warmer as Gil laughed.

Luckily for him, Gil busied himself with his journal, so Jay was able to pitch up the tent and ready the inside without any more distractions. Even dinner came and went without anything remarkable happening.

It was only as they cleaned up to get ready for bed that Jay began to grow nervous. Which was silly. What did he have to be nervous about?

He stretched lightly, trying to calm himself, and as he did, he found himself looking up at the night sky. For a moment, he forgot himself, taken by the vastness above and the multitude of stars. He remembered the first time he saw stars in Auradon; they had taken his breath away then as they did now.

Had they taken Gil's breath away yet?

"Jay, what're you— whoa!"

Jay blinked.

Gil had knocked into him, and they had both tumbled to the ground, Gil on his back and Jay on top of him, with Gil's hands on Jay's hips to steady him as Jay braced his hands on either side of Gil's head. They stared at each other.

Before Jay could say anything, Gil's breath hitched, a glint to his eyes. "Beautiful…"

Jay blinked again, his stomach fluttering before he remembered the stars above him. He tried to will away the warmth he had felt. "The stars?" he guessed lamely.

Gil blinked, his gaze flickering past Jay for a few seconds before settling back on him. "Yeah, they're pretty, but I meant you."

Jay stared, heart skipping a beat. "Me?"

With a soft smile settling on his lips, Gil nodded. "Yeah, you." And with that, he leaned up and placed a chaste kiss to Jay's lips.

And though it was chaste, it sent a spark through Jay, and he found himself leaning into the kiss.

Well, crap. Mal had been right.

He was so not looking forward to her gloating.

Still, as Gil pulled back, looking up at him with that soft smile, Jay figured he could endure Mal's smugness.

Gil was worth it.

[swimmingwolf59]

I finished reading dungeon meshi a while back and I wanted to ramble about Laois and monsters and autism

HUGE END GAME MANGA SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT!!

Though it's never explicitly stated in canon as far as I'm aware, Laois is very autistic-coded. (I think that's pretty established in fandom but I will continue anyway lol.) There are a lot of moments throughout the story that demonstrate this, but the biggest one for me was this one with Shuro (this scene was actually pretty painful for me to watch as someone who is also probably on the spectrum and has experienced this lol):

Laois completely misreads Shuro's feelings and actions, missing cues that Shuro at least assumes most people would understand. I think this is a pretty clear tell that Laois is somewhere on the autism spectrum, or at the very least it shows that social interactions are not in any way easy for him.

I think this ties into his fascination with monsters. He's definitely hyper-fixated on them, and if you've ever met an autistic person with a hyper-fixation, you can bet your ass that person knows everything there is to know about that hyper-fixation lol. But I think part of why he's so drawn to them is also because he can easily understand them. He grew up around animals (and monsters in this series are essentially wild animals), which makes them familiar, and monsters have much more defined behavior patterns that he can study and learn and use to interact with them successfully. Laois talks about this often - and a great example of this I think is the living armor fight. Laois analyzes the monster's behavior, figures out its weak points, and fights and defeats it successfully, something that I don't think he could've done easily against a human opponent.

So let's look at the chapter where Laois decides to try and defeat the winged lion by becoming the lord of the dungeon.

I think this is a key part of this whole arc. Laois doesn't think he has any desires because all previous dungeon lords that the story goes into detail about were focused on humans. Thistle's whole motivation was to keep the golden kingdom and Delgal safe - his main desires were that no harm would ever come to them. Mithrun's desire was to live happily with the person he loved, something he couldn't do in real life. And Marcille too wanted to eliminate life span differences between the races so that she wouldn't be alone, so that her friends would live and stay by her side for her whole life.

Laois on the other hand doesn't really care about society (to Kabru's continued horror lol). I think a lot of that is because he has trouble understanding and connecting with people in general, which has to be frustrating for someone who absorbs knowledge so readily, and because people have hurt him in the past. Therefore, since everyone around him is constantly telling him he shouldn't care about monsters and people are what matter, he can't fall for the winged lion's tricks, right? Because he doesn't have any desires when it comes to people (I do think it's funny that he seems to have forgotten about Falin in this part lol, but I digress).

But Laois DOES have desires about monsters.

So when he's driven to a choice between the monster world and the human world, of course he's going to pick monsters.

But I think this is also why he was able to win against the winged lion, and why literally no one else could have.

I'm fairly certain that Laois didn't actually plan the whole "I'll trick the winged lion into stealing my body and letting me become a monster so I can eat his desires" thing, at least based on his reaction when Kabru asks him this LOL.

But I do think that Laois's understanding of monsters and passion for monsters led perfectly to that situation. With how hyper-fixated Laois is on monsters, I think he saw the winged lion's ability to eat desires, and the effects that had on his victims, and thought, "Wow, that's super cool! That's definitely something the strongest monster would be able to do!" Because of that, he added it to his sketch of the strongest monster. All that was left to do was poof that strongest monster into existence, and we've seen from the shapeshifter fight that Laois is not above getting on his enemy's level.

Laois is always thinking about the world from a monster's perspective. What is a particular monster's role in the ecosystem? How do its adaptations drive its survival and the type of prey it consumes and how it consumes them? And what else could kill a monster at the top of the food chain but another monster with similar abilities that's also at the top of the food chain (like how wolves are mostly only killed by other wolves, if we take humans out of the equation)? Because Laois understands all of this, he was able to analyze the winged lion, understand what put him at the top of the food chain, and meet him on his own field. (Which makes it even more beautiful story-telling wise imo that Laois is a literal monster in the final fight.)

And I think that's why he was able to win, and why I don't think anyone else in the story could've. Only an autistic person hyper-fixated on monsters could defeat a demon at its own game, and I love that so fucking much lol.