#i might vent about race stuff if i cant stop thinking about it. bc god i dont wanna just soak in it. need it out of my head | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lazaruspiss · 23 hours ago

Text

i am. tired. u may have noticed that i am... "American" n what not.

I dont have the mental stability to keep up w all the... everything. but news of so and so trying to take citizenship from ppl born here whose parents came here Illegally (unconstitutional, not feasible, most likely just a scare tactic) made its way to me. and 2 things.

1) "we're gonna stop illegal immigration by retroactively making more people into illegal immigrants" ...very cool guys. very smart.

2) im like. 2nd gen i think? my mom was born here but her bio dad was not lol. hope my bio gramps doing ok wherever he is. never met the guy and tbh he sounds like a dick from what lil i know of him, but no one deserves. yknow. the. well i dont think theyre called camps but i cant remember the word. detention center or smth? im tired lol

#ramble tag #every day i get closer and closer to 'what if we snuck into mexico. switch it up reverse it.'#joking ofc #dont think thatd actually go well for us #everything is so surreal. like im at the point where the idea of getting deported makes me laugh more than anything #im too exhausted to be upset anymore #every since his campaign fuckin started man. i was in middle school.#i was in middle school and terrified of the line i felt i had to walk between white and not white enough #i might vent about race stuff if i cant stop thinking about it. bc god i dont wanna just soak in it. need it out of my head #im white im white im white!! but not as white as my classmates. sitting at lunch. our hands next to each other. stark.#highschool with immigrants and mexicans talked about like animals. this hurts me. but im told to shut up.#bc im not mexican enough to be allowed to do anything #i live in one of those 'you get one maybe two black students in a year' kinda towns if that explains anything #i had a kid who kept calling me the n word. he dated one of my friends. she didnt leave him until he cheated on her.#now that i think about it she hadnt talked to me in forever when she went to me after her breakup #jeez. highschool sucked ass.#ignore me im just... ugh. i have this identity crisis every once in a while dw #i think i even made a post about it before lol #smth about cultural disconnect and how that was a way that dicks romani backstory was smth i could connect to #something revealed to you that affects you but you exist in this limbo of if you can really claim it or not #like the world needs more stories that touch on race etc etc but i just mean that dicks story can fall into this sorta #white passing identity crisis thing. i find it comforting #dunno. my brain is soup

3 notes · View notes