#i might be missing some but i just spent 30mins making this list so i need to stop
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
what’s your favourite George fic that you didn’t write?
Love this question!!! Means I can give love to other writers woohoo! And tbh I could talk for ages about George writing - I feel like he doesn't get enough written about him!!
The first first first one that came to mind is One Last Night by @thef1diary because if freaking hit me in the heart so strongly and I think about it far too much. If you want a balance of angst and heart wrenching spice, read this NOW.
Speaking of angst and spice balance, A Helping Hand and it's following parts from @futurewdclandonorris was one of my first George universes I read! Smut is chefs kiss and ties in just enough with the angst that it kinda hurts?? But in that nice reading-something-good hurt??
Literally anything by @mrs-saturday as she is one of the only other mainly George x Reader writers on here with me!! But especially Only Bought This Dress So You Can Take It Off had me feeling some kinda way fr-
Corruption Kink by @safetycar-restart put me on something I didn't know I needed tbh. Just a little something that change my world and got my mind going brrrrtttt
And for some dark George, Twisted Game of Hide and Seek by @f1driverszona was my guilty pleasure. Shamelessly had me giggling kicking my feet behind my iPad while reading, catering to a part of me I sometimes suppress LOL
Straying away from xReader now, if you vibe with that!
I discovered Led by a Racing Heart by @landoisokay the other day and this one is artistry. Limited dialogue leaving room for such depth of characterization and everything. I've dabbled in a few more of this author's works but fr I need to properly sit down and read and interact because the writing style is mwah
Eagle Eyed by @prettydangrotten was so freaking addicting and riveting tbh. Every description was incredible and the characterization was nothing short of professional, parts of this fic had me holding my breath fr, and the author's way of writing George was spot onnnn imo.
@starlightiing's Stardew Valley Galex AU was the first AU of hers she told me about so it holds a special place in my heart. The crumbs we have gotten for this one so far are delectable and although Jess is the queen of Pierresteban, this AU's interpretation of Galex is something else!!!!
#i might be missing some but i just spent 30mins making this list so i need to stop#and i discovered i mostly use ao3 for landoscar fics and nothing else LMAOO#also got me realizing im proud to be one of the only george centric writing blogs#other authors dabble here and there but none that focus most of their works around him#appalling!!#anyway here you go anon :)#fic recs
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
Please talk to me
But I guess it wouldn’t help, anyway. I can talk all I want to; the problem isn’t changing or evolving quite yet. I need to sit still in an empty room for an hour and think, but motherhood doesn’t often present me that luxury. So since I have a little bit of time right now, let me use it, before it’s gone. I’m going to talk. You’re going to listen. I have a lot to get out of me.
If I had to imagine my perfect world going forward, I have no idea what would be in it. I’ve given up so much to get to this point that I barely remember what I enjoy doing anymore.
I remember when I found out I was pregnant. So many things were supposed to be different right before it happened. I was going to move to Texas but chickened out. Then I didn’t get into the college I’d been secretly praying would send me to Texas anyway, and I was crushed. I sobbed. I was then going to move to Thailand (I got the certificate to teach English finished one month before I found out I was pregnant, which means I finished it one week before I got pregnant) to get some perspective and understand myself better and try to get some distance from and time to process the intense feelings I chickened out from. I was dating several people, all of whom were unimportant distractions from reality; see “chickening out.”
Then, of all the things that could have mattered, I started dating this kinda crazy guy who had some potential to be a little less crazy, but I didn’t really care that much because I had other things going on. He wasn’t supposed to be the future father of my child. I barely even knew him. And I talked on the phone to the person who did matter, and he pointed out that staying with someone just because you’re procreating with them is a bad idea. And I didn’t listen. I wanted to try because I didn’t have two sets of parents. I saw my dad like maybe 10 times in my life, all but two being before the age of 5.
Shortly after finding out I was pregnant, we decided we were in it together. He was going to be there for me. I wasn’t going to be abandoned. We started going to couples therapy, paid for by the big bad sexist/racist/homophobic/history-revising/repression-inducing (but it reminded me of my most recent shrooms trip at the time, so I didn’t care about that list) Mormon Church.
She was a great therapist. Getting her grad degree. Divorced. Not some crock religious counselor who tells you that you’re loved by angels and that Jesus will wash away your tears, amen. She was great. But she believed in us making it work. Because that was the reality she and the father of my fetus understood and had been sold their entire lives. Meanwhile, I was frustrated with myself for my issues (re: chickening out) and wanted to believe I could escape the weird life I’d been led into by my mom and my aunt that fast forwarded to this terrifying image of me becoming an old maid who never could loosen her grip on the reins long enough to know what love even was. Except maybe when drunk, but then that was like, “Hey, there aggression. Nice to get acquainted. You’ve got a lot of pent up shit in here, and alcohol is sort of exacerbating that.” Nevermind that I’m starting to learn that my inability to love unabashedly and compulsive behavioral fixes have something to do with being the adult child of an alcoholic. I didn’t have any idea about that then. I barely have an idea about that now. I told the therapist in our first session before I was pregnant that I thought maybe I wanted to get married and have a family of my own one day, and then BAM it had happened. It had to be fate, right? So, I started pregnant-waddling down this path to “healthy marriage” and family. I slowly stopped working and started letting him pay the bills. I slowly/quickly (depending on how you look at it) stopped talking to any and all straight/male friends and many of my straight/or-gay/female friends, no matter how important they were to me. I slowly got huge (I gained a lot of pregnant weight) and miserable and regretted the decision to stay pregnant half the time. I considered running away and making it on my own, but I felt trapped by my lease and all of the sacrifices I had already made to try to make this fucking work. I considered going somewhere else and not telling him when I had the baby and just hiding away almost every time we got into another one of our huge blowout fights. But then he would help me. We lived in this teeny apartment, and he rearranged the furniture just how I’d wanted while I was out of town for a week. He would put my socks and shoes on, rub my feet, sacrifice his place on the bed when I was uncomfortable, help me shave my legs, go to therapy with me each week. He tried so hard. I sobbed alone on long drives around the city and hated myself for the one brief moment that had conceived my son.
But then he was born, and all of that changed. I can’t explain that love to you. Even my issues couldn’t stop me from loving this magnificent human. He’s a miracle. He’s the only thing I’ve ever felt I was meant to do. And I had no clue till he came out. But now I know.
His dad stepped up again. He tried again. He set me up every day with food and water so I wouldn’t have to get out of bed. He cooked and cleaned and worked so that I could stay in bed with my postpartum pain and the baby. I needed him, and he did everything I needed. There were still outbursts sometimes, but we were stressed. Who wouldn’t have outbursts with a life that hard and cramped? Then our son started getting a little older, and it wasn’t getting any easier. He wanted to have sex, naturally. He’d quit being Mormon, and we’d eloped so that we could explain to the government how many people were really in our household. He wanted to have sex and reconnect with me. But we spent the first year and two months of our relationship trying so hard NOT to have sex (because Mormon) that we’d wasted any chance we might have had to build that intimacy. Now, I was in excruciating pain and honestly really turned off by the thought of sex. I was exhausted. I still am. I rarely get a chance to shower. Some days, I forget or don’t get the chance to eat more than once. Back then, I never ate unless Zac allowed me to. If he was tired and cranky and didn’t feel like helping, I didn’t get to go to the bathroom or eat food or shower. I just had to deal with it. So when he was tired and at his limits, he pushed me way past mine. And honestly, I think I started to hate him for it. I may not have meant to, but I think the resentment was incredibly deep, and I loved Montgomery too much to feel it toward him. I know Zac had every right to be tired. We were working so hard. But as he got more tired, he woke up less to help me at night. As he got more tired, he changed fewer diapers and walked Montgomery to sleep less. As he got more tired, he gave me fewer breaks. And I started to lose my fucking mind.
Then my mom split her house in half to give us some privacy, and we moved in with her. My literal worst nightmare mixed with my wildest dreams. Montgomery could have a yard to learn to run and walk in that we could afford without me going back to work (since at that point, he couldn’t be away from me for more than 10 minutes without losing his shit anyway, I couldn’t even fathom working) but at the price of living alongside my mother again. I love my mother. I need her help with my son. I’m very grateful for this living situation. The rent is affordable, and the babysitter is free. But we still have a very complicated past and dynamic. Mixing the things I had to constantly give up to be with Zac with the things I have to give up to be with my mom finally sent me over the edge. Zac and my mom started to have this silent battle for control over my actions, and Montgomery is a baby, so he needed/needs me pretty much at all times. Zac’s anger kept getting bigger, despite mine being totally under wraps with the addition of motherhood as a part of my personality and the total absence of alcohol for almost two years (thanks, pregnancy and breastfeeding). He quit his job to go back to school, and we decided to live on loans–something that’s just the opposite of what I’m naturally comfortable with. He was home for six weeks. During those six weeks, most days, he was still tapped out. He cooked quite a bit, cleaned a little off and on, and didn’t do any work, but I still had to ask for showers and cut my time short because meltdowns were my job. Night wakings were still predominantly dealt with by me. I still felt unhelped. And while he was home, the jealousy kept peaking. It’s hard enough to talk on the phone with a baby present. Forget it when we’re all home. My only reality was the house. Not to mention that in that house, I would go into the dark with Montgomery for 12 hours each night. I would lay down with him for 30mins-2 hours every time he napped. During those times, Zac would sit in the living room getting alone time. Alone time I desperately needed and was asking for and still wasn’t getting.
Seriously, after all of that shit. No wonder it broke. After having so little time for myself in 8 months that it’s literally quantifiable (in hours) on my hands, it’s no wonder.
So I accepted a job. I needed some excuse to be alone for a minute. It was only 8-10 hours per week, condensed into two days. Good hourly pay rate. Good company. Room to move up in the future and get more work/hours/pay. And the kicker? From home. Literally my dream. Work a legit job that I can have anywhere. Hello, travel. I’ve been missing you. Unfortunately, that was the breaking point for Zac. Something about him having to help me watch Montgomery during those hours of work just wouldn’t click. And he snapped. But I’m so tired and so at my own breaking point from the zero time I’ve had to myself that I also snapped.
And now we’re here.
1 note
·
View note
Text
Canyoneering or canyoning (n.) is considered a sport of exploring a canyon that includes: rappelling, rafting and waterfall jumping.
Caution: Jump at your own risk, but luckily, you can skip the hard levels anyway.
Canyoneering is the first on my “100 things bucket list” (inspired by Sebastian Terry’s book – 100 Things – what’s on your list?).
You may wonder why canyoneering is the first on my bucket list; just so you know, I live in Cebu City, Philippines. I have been in Cebu for almost 3 years now, and I have to admit I haven’t tried anything extreme nor did I explore much of Cebu. I have first heard about canyoneering from my officemates in a call center and all of them asked me to join in which I definitely said “no”. I am afraid of heights and closed or small spaces- so I don’t think I need to further explain why I said “no”. Scaredy cat you may say I am but in all honesty, YES, I don’t have the angst nor guts. Not until you encounter a certain tragedy that will then let you realize, living in a box nor extensive precaution will let you miss the fun in living. Alright, alright, will skip the boring details and will proceed with the action and thrill of this experience.
Here it goes…
My client asked me to head to Badian with some people from our company, experience canyoneering and live to tell the experience, all expenses paid (so I can’t say “NO” and just shooed my coward side somewhere else). Just got lucky! :)
Before continuing my story, things to note for a canyoneering well-spent in Badian:
You can hire a car (Toyota Innova) for as low as 5,500PHP. 6,500PHP for a van. The transfer fee is already to and from your destination. Or, you can ride the bus at South Bus Terminal an hour away if you are coming from Mactan-Cebu International Airport. Bus fare can be 150PHP to 200PHP depending on the bus you will be riding, if it has an AC, then it’ll be expensive. For this trip, we hired a car instead.
Not that I am promoting here, but just a piece of advice, Get a tour package! Why? Because everything else will be taken cared for. The package already includes food and bottled water, motorcycle fee, entry fee, tour guide and canyoneering gear. Side note for gears: They will provide a helmet and a life jacket with a harness. They will also provide you some trekking shoes or sandals if they have available shoes with your size (ssshh! Just a tip, I would personally advise you to wear your own trekking shoes or sandals, you might not like the ones they will be offering). For this, I would personally recommend Highland Adventures (for further details, please see link: https://highlandadventuresph.wordpress.com/) Canyoneering package is at 1,500PHP/pax which is really affordable and the service they have rendered is more than the price, so better check them out if you’re planning to experience canyoneering.
A must not forget note: You will be needing lots and lots of water! (I know you will from time to time be able to drink some of the river’s water but don’t worry, I haven’t had any stomach ache nor were the people who went with me – haha).
For an ultimate list of what to bring for canyoneering, kindly click here!
Alright, I apologize for the ads, I just wanna make sure you guys will get the ultimate canyoneering experience like I did.
So, the exact date was March 18, 2017. The trip started at the meeting place where the 6 of us met in the parking lot of Mango Square Mall Cebu City. Since the meeting place is near a Jollibee chain, we have some meals for breakfast and drop by the 7-eleven shop for chips and some bottled water. The trip from the city to Badian can take roughly 4-5hrs depending on your speed and congestion. As for me, I am used to long land travels, since I have traveled from Zamboanga City all the way to Davao City (that’s like 26hrs all in all, these are the Southern part of the Philippines). Along the way, you will be passing by the famous “lechon” town in Cebu which is Carcar (this is also the biggest shoe factory in the city), you will know when you are in Carcar because you’ll see a roundabout as old as time, PLUS you’ll see vendors selling “chicharon” (A local trademark of Carcar which is consisted of fried pork belly or pork rinds). You won’t totally get bored along the travel since you will be seeing the beauty of nature at its finest details, from trees to valleys, to beaches and sunrise. You will totally get lost with the Spanish-inspired churches and plaza, old houses and ruins. And of course, not to mention the long and funny chit-chats with your friends.
Once you reached Badian, you may inform Michael (Highland adventure’s contact person) and they will be happily meeting you, their station is just along the road so you will not be having any hard time locating them.
A short briefing will be held at the station, followed by signing a waiver and settling of accounts for any balance.
Here’s us after the briefing.
POWER NOTE: Please do some stretching before canyoneering to avoid muscle pain, I am reminding you and I am telling you, you will be sore all throughout the next day if you won’t.
Once briefing is done, they will hand you over your life vests and will be assisting you with the harness. NOTE: It is government mandated “to always wear your respective helmets”.
And we are set with our canyoneering gears!
Every group of people (maximum of 10) can be accompanied by (2) two guides, these guides are well trained and know the trails by heart, as they grew with the river and had their childhood in it as well. In this photo, we are accompanied by one of the coolest guide (in yellow helmet) you’ll ever meet. The above photo was taken on our way down from the station to ride the “habal-habal” or motorcycle going to the entrance of the canyoneering site.
Note: You don’t need to pay the drivers of the motorcycle as it is already part of the package. The road to the entrance of the site can be a bit rocky and a bit steep but I can guarantee you won’t feel it anyway as you will be too busy looking at the sceneries around you.
Once you get to the entrance, you will be required to register your names, and that’s it. The walking starts here… Make sure to hold on tight to your bottled water because you will need it. The walk to the mouth of the river will take at least 15-30mins depending on how fast you can walk. The path has been cemented, you’ll feel like you’re just walking through a canopy in a park.
This is the steepest part of the path, so I guess you can just all manage since most of us did. And the rest are either plain or going down (they have created stairs made of mud!) :)
Yipee! We reached the middle of the trail (that part of which needed walking, not the actual canyoneering trail).
Don’t worry if you ran out of bottled water along the way, you will be able to pass by some local stores and they even offer fresh coconut juice! Whew!
I am sure a couple of minutes after you go down the stairs made of mud, you will feel a sudden excitement as you hear the rush of the water, oh before I forget, don’t get too excited as you might slide down the stairs, be careful and watch your steps. It can be a little bit slidey. It will all be worth it I swear! When you reach the end of the stairs, you will be welcomed by these amazing rock formation – I know, nature has its own art!
See the look on our faces? I, for one, was captivated and left speechless, I have never seen something like this my whole life of traveling.
The actual canyoneering trail will start here. The swimming and jumping, climbing and walking will start here. Alert! Water in the river is “cold”, so know what to expect! Brrrrrr.
The jump. The jump you will need to take is from 12ft to 35ft (this is the last level – yes, save the best for last!)
This is the first level of all the jumpings in this trail. This is “just” 12ft for adrenaline junkies, but for people that are afraid of heights (like me!), this is already a grail for contemplating about your past mistakes. I am not the one who is jumping in the picture (if you have that question in mind when looking at the photo). I was the second to the last from a group of 6 to jump off this first level (I did have an actual video of the jump, but sad to say, all files were corrupted and gone – I know, a bummer right?). And in all honesty, I can still remember vividly what the feeling was – once you’ve got your feet up in the air world war III happens inside your head (regrets, mistakes, past, and the never ending what if’s of life). Seriously the longest 2 seconds of your life and whoosh, cold water embraces and knocks out your senses back to life – and yes, I survived!
Power tip for not-so-adrenaline people: Don’t think and just jump!
After the first level jump, everything will be easy and free flowing. Imagine the feeling of just letting go and having a full on fun.
And this is just us having fun and going with the flow ;)
Who will resist a swing? Who will resist a couple of minutes being a kid? No one right? As you go near the Kawasan falls, you will have a chance to try the swing that will take you directly to the water (For only 10PHP – how awesome that can be!) or a slide that goes with the actual flow of the river.
The photo at the top seem like my other posted pictures for this canyoneering experience but wait, don’t be deceive as this is the last jump for this trail which is 35ft. There is still the mother of all jumps which is the 60ft but it’s now closed for some reasons. I was the only person in the group who didn’t have the guts to jump and went to pass the long-cut but not too long, it’s just a mixture of a 5min walk uphill and downhill until we reached the end of the trail and had the most sumptuous meal after a vigorous activity. In our menu: Pork sinigang (Pork stew in tamarind), fried chicken and unlimited rice.
Note that you will still have to walk back for 10-15mins out of Kawasan falls and ride a tricycle back to Highland Adventure station where your driver is waiting to take you home.
I just want to reserve this section for my client Roslyn Ranse for making this experience possible for us.
“Thank you”.
Bucketlist Number 1: Badian Canyoneering Canyoneering or canyoning (n.) is considered a sport of exploring a canyon that includes: rappelling, rafting and waterfall jumping.
0 notes