#i meant dont go it came out as goodbye you said ok when you shouldve said we should try /lyr

[justabunchofdragons]

events of today

counselling (went well! i didnt realise how bad i am at vocalising what's wrong. honestly was surprising to me how many questions she asked that i went "um. oh." so we arent going to unpack that)

kept hearing yoko by maisie peters in my head and now i am going to cry :-)

[gwisingegooli]

party yesterday and the night before was really good

it’s cool talking to new people who are different ages and have different experiences from you!! everybody was really memorable, and nice. good mix of people for sure.

i really liked hanging out w people and just having a chill time yesterday. hope theres more opportunities to hang out w everyone. endless joints being passed around. we thought we ran out of alcohol but then there was a ton more in the freezer LOL. that’s how you know a party’s good.

one guy, ama_ris, was a total party dad, checked on everyone, made sure volume wasn’t too loud outside, also yiked on some chick and we were all like oh mah god LOLOL apparently someone who wasn’t black said the n word and he made a psa to erryone that that word wasn’t ok LOL it was like oof but yeah. i gave him an edible but just one since he already took half a tab of molly LOL

jerem__y x_ue came through with his gf!! they were realy cute togetha. she’s really sweet and smiley. they were hella good at beer pong but they were playing against one dude m_att who was literally on the baseball team!!!! ma_tt literally made six cups in a row LOLOL but it ended up being a really close, hype game.

then i played w someone and i was actually IN THE ZONE and turned my competitive tryhard mode on. we were both killin it but we ended up very narrowly losing. but it was definitely a good game.

there were these three white girls who came and were havin a good time together and i really liked their vibe. i only met one of them but apparently she went to tino, same year as jer_my and they were like omg!!! LOLOL i talked to her for like ten seconds but her smile was so cute and bright that i got really smilely back LOL

the dance floor was SO INTENSE LOL. i’m not cool so i didn’t know the songs that well but people were like GOING AT IT yellin lyrics grindin on each other. i just like danced through it every time i moved rooms LOL whoo cannot match that energy but wish i could

whenever we went outside there were some dope conversations going on. a decent amount of tino people came thru, and it was nice seeing the homies again. n_ic_k and i r actually bffs now hehe. he was rolling for the first time in a year and i would see him every once in a while and he’d update me w how he was feeling. i’d be like u good homie :) LOL

this dude named con_over was fuckin lit at talking and really knew bay area culture. you could tell he’d hung out w a ton of different people, and he was really quick. he was talking to g_abe about like armenian people in the bay, and like competitive hs kids at lynbrook, about p flo LMAO yknow

later when we were chilling outside i told him he should stream LOLOL and actually he’s like decent at gaming although he doesnt make it his whole life. i was vibin w the group convo tho and then he engaged me in like side convo about video games and kinda awk but when he asked me about like how much i play and stuff i was like eh i dont really wanna talk about video games rn. and then he like clarified and asked again and i was like nah i just dont really wanna talk about video games rn. cause i just wanted to rejoin the main group but is whateva

ok now talkin bout a few things myself. i realized what dfeng meant when he said i didn’t know how to chill. i know how to be an active participant, and even a passive participant, but i never just chill LOL but yesterday was perfect for just chillin and absorbin the vibes. i think that’s literally the most i’ve just chilled at a party LOL imma do that more bc uhhh why not lol. go w the flow.

also edibles r my fave at a party. i feel really chill and like ok w everything.

i also tried like coming up w really good group questions when the timing was right and there was the slightest lull in convo. it was pretty great LMAO and i love asking shit like that. like if there was a coin and one side was $50 million, and the other side was aids... would you flip it LOL i love when people have strong answers and go off LOLOL

i also love like side vibin w randos. if theres a vibe i appreciate ill let u know yknow LOLOL one guy was goin off about how cereal was a soup and i was like u got some wisdom to share and he was like meaningfully nods LOLOL

i think i should leave a little earlier? idk lol i think i left at a perfect time but shit just happened to go down (three people helping someone yakking outside). my only regret is like being kinda rude to con_over and then not helping that person outside. i shouldve just checked in instead of being weird about it and just leaving. luckily con_over is cool and was like have a nice night LOLOL. i also missed saying goodbye to amar_is since he went to help out w vomiting dood

also lowkey everyone at the party who knew me hyped me up and was like THIS IS THE MEME QUEEN LOOOOL i was like .oh god.. but its my legacy tho (◡‿◡✿) everybody at the office apparently still talks about me all the time like i’m still there heart heart. i’m so glad i got the opporunity to be editor in chief. and i’m also so glad that la voz only continues to grow and be even more amazing. my office was like i love everyone!! lets have a fun time. and then it was like. we are legitimizing journalism. this program will train you. *intense voice* but i love it. and chr_istian is totally gonna do an amazing job. he knows how to be serious and connect w everyone. i gave him my blessing LOL he’s gonna be amazing.

i liked really talking to a_na, cause i hadn’t before. and anna (different person) was great LOL she knew how to be the life of the party and had an amazing laugh.

one dude j_osh was MY MAN LOL he literally went around the party w alc and his goal was to make sure everyone got fucked up. it was amazing i loved him. i wanna be that guy too LOLOL. whenever i saw him making rounds in whatever room i was in i’d be like my man LOLOL and he’d do the bro nod and smile

i really liked everyone there. none of the guys were weird at all. nobody was shady. everyone was nice and out here to have a good time, get a lil turnt, make new friends, maybe share some wisdoms.

just mah reflections. i wanna say bye to everyone when possible!! always check in on fucked up people. chill. ask fun questions. wish i did one crazy, memorable thing but there’s always next time LOLOL